BiJou 27 The Bisexual Journal May 2013 www.bine.net/bijou

Kaboom: The Film Winged Visions: Concept seminar What to do against Homophobia? Bi-Quiz: Quiz cards and more.... BiJou 27 Table of contents We‘ve got the first word!

We’ve got the first word!...... 3 The earth is shaking – on one side It’s me again Traveling all over the place 20 years of BiNe – an excursion with Anja...... 4 the resistance against gay marria- Around ten years ago I first att- First of all a warm welcome to ge is crumbling, on the other side empted to work on the BiJou on Mara: May you have lots of fun and Interview with Walter...... 6 hate and discrimination towards a regular basis. What despite good success in our editorial team! Ecstasy is Necessary...... 7 non-heterosexuals is thriving. intentions failed at the first att- My focus this time wasn’t wri- We dealt with these issues in our empt, went perfectly smooth in the ting. Instead I worked on getting Kaboom!...... 8 past issue (Bijou 26) with articles second attempt. And it was com- an ISSN for the BiJou (ISSN is an Who invented what? The bi:forum turns one...... 9 about different political parties, pletely unintentional this time, it ISBN for magazines) and represen- Concept seminar 2013: Winged visions...... 10 gay marriage, and the situation in just happened. I sent maybe three ted BiNe at events we were invited Russia. In this issue we’ve got an emails to Frank about some ideas to (like an invitation to speak at Honourable desire: Your commitment to self-determined sexuality...... 11 interview on homophobia as well I had and before I knew it I was the European Commission against The end of the one-time rule...... 12 as an American study about bi- an official member of the editori- Racism and Intolerance (ECRI) and Six times Sex...... 14 and homophobia (The end of the al team. Naturally then I had no the opening of the first rainbow one-time rule). choice but to deliver. ☺ family centre in Berlin). The ultimate bi quiz...... 15 Changes are being promised at the I’m looking forward to, as per the I hope you enjoy reading! What to do against homophobia?...... 19 concept seminar (Winged visions) pleasure principle, do what I en- Meschede rocks! Where fox and bisexuals bid each other good night....22 while the interview 20 years BiNe joy doing (writing) and to at the Christoph e.V. allows us a look back. same time create something with Where’s a man a man?...... 23 The main focus this time is the bi others, which will - hopefully - We don’t want to be telephones! – Polyamory...... 24 film Kaboom… enjoy reading! bring you, the readers, enjoyment Also I’d like to welcome Mara as an and maybe a light bulb moment or Swinger clubs postal code 3...... 28 active new addition to the editori- two. The bisexual umbrella...... 30 al team! Now there are three of us! Enjoy reading and see you in the Impressum...... 31 next issue… Frank Infos...... 32 Mara

Bisexuality doesn’t equal bisexuality! Not every bisexual is the same. There are plenty of variations! I think the differences between different bisexuals are greater than between he- tero-, bi-, and homosexuals. Since not every issue of the Bijou can cover all types of bisexuals, let me point out a few ways in which bisexuals can differ from each other. They can be anywhere between:

• Monogamous to polyamorous, • Loyal to cheating, • Having sex with only one person to being a swinger, • asexual to nymphomaniac, • more attracted to one gender to “fifty-fifty“, The Bi Quiz (Part 1) • completely outed to completely closeted, The bi quiz cards (in the centre of the magazine) can be cut out and used for a number of different game • interested in men and women to interested in more androgynous people, variations. • possibly transgender, intersexual, etc or not, One idea would be: • identifying oneself as bisexual to not believing in labels. The players take turns reading the topmost card to be answered by the person sitting next to them. If they know the answer they receive 2 points. If they don’t, the “reader” reads the 3 possible answers. If the “gues- Each contributor in this journal has his or her own idea as well – and ser” answers correctly after the choices being read they receive one point. by the mere act of writing the article nothing is said about their own But of course it’s up to you how you want to make use of the cards. sexual identity, orientation, or behaviour. Enjoy! Frank Frank

3 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 Most people only associate BiNe with the open mee- What do you wish BiNe for the next 20 years? 20 years of BiNe tings – do you feel the same way? Or is BiNe more I wish that BiNe will always be a network that fights than that? against homophobia and that stands for equality and – an excursion with Anja Of course BiNe is more than just the open meetings! acceptance of different lifestyles. And of course I’d BiNe is an advocacy which offers the possibility to like for the meetings to continue. state and develop political demands. BiNe in my How long have you been a BiNe member and how did you can forgive me for not remembering. Those were opinion has spearheaded many discussions on sexu- Interview conducted by Mara you find out about BiNe? times where the BiJou, current, informative, and full al identity, love, and relationships, through the se- I was at a national meeting in Groß-Bademäusel in of enthusiasm, stood for the networking of bi-inte- minars by Jürgen Höhn and Bettina Wessolowski to the early 90s where they discussed founding an as- rest groups and individuals in Germany. name just one example. It reaches beyond bisexuality sociation. I was against it because I didn‘t want to and that’s very important. I find the question inte- join yet another association and I felt that the or- If you were to compare BiNe at the very beginning resting on whether bisexuality or specifically poly- ganisation of meetings was going just fine without with BiNe today, what changes do you perceive? relationships bear a socio-political relevance since one. I’d been in several other associations and it was Hmm… those that every association goes through people who are involved in multiple relationships my experience that it could get pretty complicated. throughout its development and professionalisati- display less competitiveness and aggression at work I did ultimately join the association out of solidarity on. I believe the demand for professional visibility and in their private life. to Winnie since further organisation of the meetings has increased. I also think that the drive to achieve would have only been possible through a funding of something politically has become stronger and that Is BiNe getting enough people involved? For the as- her work. activities like the participation at the CSD allow us sociation, for political issues? to go more public. The reason for this change might I don’t know. I guess so. I’m not really involved in What does BiNe mean to you? Is it just an association be that the public image of bisexuality has evolved. what the association does internally. to you or is it something more? Did you get true and There were times that bi was ‘in’, there were cover lasting friendships out of it? stories in magazines like the Marie Claire, and, at the How do you live your bisexuality? Are you monoga- Of course there have been true and lasting friend- time, shocking reports that dealt with bisexuality and mous or polyamorous? ships, for as long as I’ve been active in the bisexual sadomasochism. I remember one particular situation I’ve been openly bisexual since I was 16. That was scene. On a professional as well as private level, at in the 90s, when I was still working for the BiJou. never a question for me. I’m married and am current- meetings, seminars, workshops... There have been a I’d given an interview for Jürgen Domian at the WDR ly in a heterosexual monogamous relationship with number of people who have left an impression in my with two other guys. Inge Meisel joined in via tele- my husband, with occasional sexual encounters with heart and whom I’d really like to see again. These en- phone and said that it wasn’t a big deal anymore no- women. Polyamory would be too complicated for me. counters were always very meaningful and I wouldn’t wadays. I disagreed and argued that bisexual people It’s difficult enough to keep ONE long-term relation- want to miss a single one of them. In short, I’ve be- were still being discriminated against today. She was ship going. come a part of BiNe. I have to admit that it probably acting all arrogant and insisted that I was wrong and wasn’t such a bad idea to found this association after that nowadays discrimination wasn’t an issue anymo- Anything else you’d like to say on the topic of BiNe, all. I’m still not much of an “association person” but re. I felt that her position was too undifferentiated bisexuality, or yourself? I am now blessed with the kindness of old age so I since discrimination didn’t always manifest openly or I’m much more ‘offensive’ with my bisexuality now no longer care to oppose it. aggressively. Just because you couldn’t see it didn’t by being a part of a poster campaign here in North mean that it wasn’t there. The development of BiNe Rhine-Westphalia for instance. Back in the 90s I was Can you think of a particularly nice/funny/crazy/me- became really apparent to me at the mixed meetings. already active by appearing in newspapers and the morable experience with BiNe? Until far into the 90s these meetings had always radio but this poster campaign is on another level Holy shit, just one? I couldn’t think of a meeting that been something very familiar, something comfortab- altogether. It’s become something more aware, more WASN’T exciting, fun, and memorable. All meetings le. These little comfy meetings changed throughout conscious. had a certain charm, led to new insights and inspira- the years and turned bigger and bigger, and more tions. Sure, the first meeting was probably the most and more people attended. What became more and memorable. It was the first time that I’d encountered more unsettling for me was the increasingly strong people that were bisexual and defined themselves as emphasis on sexual encounters. That is when I began such. It was a feeling of having arrived in a familiar, withdrawing from those meetings and going to the secure place, and being caught in a wave of people women’s meetings instead since to me, they still had Bi & Friends Hamburg after ten years of solo organising now with who were the same as I. It was the mixed meeting in that familiar feeling. It was more about exchanging big team: Fresh into the year 2013, Frank is no longer doing Gelsenkirchen in the early 90s which had been orga- ideas rather than about hopping in bed. I did – and the job all by himself but is receiving support from five other nised by Claudia. It was also the time I first began still do – find that a very pleasant change of pace for people. We’ve still got our regular Stammtisch meetings, game working on the BiJou, it was incredibly exciting. The myself as well as for the many women that go there, nights, wine samplings, movie nights, and once in a while a trip team harmonised very well, we were creative and of- full of curiosity, wanting to talk about being a wo- to the sauna: Bi & Friends HH – every 1st Saturday of the month ten met at all kinds of different places. I still remem- man, regardless of sexual orientation, and wanting to at 7pm at the Variable, Karolinenstr. 23, 20357 Hamburg and ber Heiner, Frank was already there by then, Thomas, approach the topic of sexuality among women. every 3rd Thursday of the month at 7pm at changing locations. Vivi, Robin, Angelika, and if I missed anyone, I hope Contact: www.bigaystammtisch.de 4 5 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 of the most important turning points in my life and I Opening of first centre for rainbow look forward to many more decades with BiNe. Interview with Walter families The first centre for rainbow fami- What do you wish BiNe for the next 20 years? lies has had its grand opening on That we never get tired of one another and stay open How did you hear about BiNe? cally, there were around 20 bi women and men sliding March 15th in Berlin. Famous Ger- for new generations of bisexual men and women. I lived as a gay man for 15 years and in the fall of around in several litres of warm oil. man politicians (Renate Künast of 2007 I noticed that I was beginning to look at wo- the Greens, and others from the Interview conducted by Mara men, too. I was surprised and felt that I needed to If you were to compare BiNe from when you first joi- CDU and SPD) were there as well as explore these feelings further. So I googled bisexu- ned with BiNe today, what changes do you perceive? our very own Christoph, who went ality, got redirected to the BiNe website and there That’s a difficult question to answer. What I’ve noti- as representative of the Bisexu- just happened to be an open meeting 6 weeks later. ced for myself the most is that I didn‘t know anyone al Network. (http://berlin.lsvd. I signed up and things just kept going from there. in the beginning and have grown to be a part of it de/projekte/regenbogenfamilien/) When I first got to the meeting I wasn’t even sure if now. I’ve noticed that I perceive a great continuity (German) I was doing the right thing or if these feelings were in the people I meet there. Short URL: http://bit.ly/YGWH0E just a flash in the pan. Most people only associate BiNe with the open mee- What does BiNe mean to you? Is it just an association tings – do you feel the same way? Or is BiNe more to you or is it something more? Did you get true and than that? lasting friendships out of it? I mainly think of the open meetings in addition to By now it’s become the sensation of “coming home” the men’s meetings. But I am thinking about beco- and entering a world that I don’t have nearly enough ming more involved in the association’s work in the of in my everyday life. So the biannual open meetings coming years, simply because BiNe is an opportunity represent a break from everyday life. In the past five to live bisexuality more consciously. years two relationships have come out of BiNe – with a man and a woman, each having lasted one year. How do you live your bisexuality? Ecstasy is Necessary I’m still in touch with both of them. It’s also become That’s a very good question. In actuality I live both more apparent to me that I really care for a lot of the sides of my sexuality much too little. In the past years A Practical Guide by Barbara Carrellas people I’ve met at the meetings and it saddens me I’ve had 80% of my sexual encounters (aside from the that I don’t get to have them present in my regular two year-long relationships) at the meetings. Though life. I’m currently trying to change that by putting I lived out my sexuality there quite extensively, the Lately, I’ve developed a certain interest in Tantra, isn’t taken for granted either and the book also in- more effort into opposite is the case in everyday life. For me, bisexu- visiting courses and reading up on some literature. cludes tips for one’s own little orgy. Barbara Carrellas keeping in touch ality is strongly associated with openly approaching But I never really liked what I read. There, Tantra builds bridges between Tantra and S&M. One chapter with the BiNe other people and not categorising people according lives off the gender dynamics between man and wo- is dedicated to their apparently contradictory natures people by pho- to ‘friends’ on one side and ‘sexual partners’ on the man and is incredibly esoterically charged. They talk and points out how they fit together. ning and emai- other, as is often the case in the heterosexual and of Shiva and Shakti as man and woman. Or from the The whole thing is rounded off by a comprehensive ling them regu- gay scenes. People should be able to meet one ano- pelvis of the woman or the vagina, depending on the section with literature- and film recommendations, larly. ther without feeling like “something needs to happen type of Tantra these are called Yoni, and there are a meeting places, workshops, and shopping. What I now” or “nothing is supposed to happen”. lot of other names giving the whole thing an esoteric particularly enjoyed were the music recommendations Can you think I’m openly bisexual in my private as well as profes- touch. on which musical piece fits to which Tantra mood and of a particularly sional life. The problem is that I used to live as a Not so in Ecstasy is Necessary. Here the author speaks variation. special experi- gay man and that many people can’t differentiate candidly about pussies, dicks, and fucking. A little The book doesn‘t just attract with its great content ence with BiNe? between bi- and homosexuality. When I was still to- eso-speak is still present but it’s the nature of the but the layout and design is fantastic as well. Nice There are so many gether with my boyfriend, it didn’t really bother me topic and I can live with that. simple illustrations emphasise the content. The for- special experien- if people thought I was gay since at the time the The book is meant for anyone, regardless of gender mat is square and makes it an eye-catcher in any ces I can think gay side of me was still dominant. But now that I’m or preferences. The terms man and woman are deli- bookshelf. I‘m thrilled with this book and can only of. What spon- single again I’m noticing that both sides are starting berately avoided. The book is meant for all genders recommend it to anyone who is interested in tantric taneously comes to balance out and that I would like to communicate and sexualities. sex. It‘s a great queer sex book (Amazon, 251 pages, to mind would that. In the gay scene especially I try to make very Breathing techniques are introduced as well as small $12.45). be the “Glitschi” clear that I’m bisexual and I always stress that I’m bi rituals or hand movements that lead to ecstasy. There John Workshop that because that’s who I am, and not because I’m afraid is no order in which exercises should be done, unlike was first held a of being gay. in many other books. Instead it encourages people to few years ago play and discover, to have fun with Tantra and one’s in Butzbach and Anything else you’d like to say on the topic of BiNe, own desires. It’s an invitation for all that want to then again in bisexuality, or yourself? fuck better – whatever a good fuck might mean to Bad Belzig. Basi- The day that I first joined BiNe six years ago was one whoever is reading it. The healing aspect of Tantra 6 7 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 monogamous story but even monogamous bisexuals The film Kaboom is available for purchase on DVD and Kaboom won’t be able to think bad of this character. He’s Blu-ray at Wild Bunch Germany/Universum. young and somehow everything is totally normal and – finally something worth watching for bisexuals! okay the way it is. This portrayal of bisexuality is so completely positive that it’s just fun to watch. The side characters are interesting as well and Stella’s “Kaboom” is an onomatopoeic word for an explosion, witty comments are a lot of fun, “Straight guys are it is a comic series, a book with memories of the war gayer than gay guys. The fact that they are in love in Iraq, a bike, a videogame, a Mexican game show, and can’t suck each other’s dicks makes them act a cornflakes brand, but most importantly it’s a fan- queerer than Clay Aiken,” But the best thing is the tastic bi-positive film which is exciting, fun, and a birthday present… But I won’t reveal too much! must-see for all bisexuals! Frank The cover of Gregg Araki’s FSK-16 film says “Not even a David Lynch film could be much more off-beat!” and if you’ve seen Blue Velvet, Twin Peaks, or Mul- holland Drive, you can guess what kind of journey Kaboom will take you on. A friend didn’t attend movie night because she’s “neither into science fiction nor into teen films”. Too bad for her, because neither, especially the former, Chris Zylka applies to this film. The story is pretty weird and crazy –beginning with a mysterious dream, strange More bi films people and visions, a connection between witches, Not too long ago most bi films turned out to be gay/lesbian coming out sects and mysterious abductions is formed. But since films. Now, however, there seem to be a lot more options. Kaboom, Three, what the film is really about are the wonderfully writ- Puccini for Beginners, Kissing Jessica Stein, Vicky Cristina Barcelona, ten characters, the - compared to other queer films The Opposite of Sex, Hamam, Happy Endings, Crustacés et coquillages, A still fairly down to earth - storyline is pushed into Home at the End of the World, The Sex Of Angels, Brokeback Mountain – the background. although most people consider the latter a gay film.

The characters are awesome: • The athletic, not very bright surfer boy Thor is the stereotypical heterosexual, but his fondness for 20 colourful flip flops – neatly organised in his closet – and his extensive grooming rituals speak volumes. • The sarcastic lesbian Stella is always there for her Who invented what? friends and falls for a female control freak whom The bi:forum turns one Haley Bennett and Roxane Mesquida she can’t get rid of so easily. • The straight-to-the-point party animal London is into gay men, likes to experiment, and also deve- lops new feelings during her studies. • And the one everything/-one revolves around – biforum.haz.ch is a place where people meet and ex- The bi: forum was formed a year ago out of a private the bisexual Smith – Thor’s roommate, Stella’s change stories about their lives and experiences. A initiative and is being supported by haz.ch. It offers best friend, and ultimately London’s boyfriend. lot of people realise at some point in their lives that a freely accessible and ad free forum, chat, agenda, they are attracted not only to one, but both sexes. and additional resources on bisexuality. Everyone is Along with Smith, played by Thomas Dekker (known invited to join the forum and be part of a lively dis- from series like Heroes and Terminator – the Sarah Since monosexuality still seems to be the social norm, cussion. Connor Chronicles) we suffer and long for desire and that kind of realisation could lead to insecurities or love. He also takes us on a strange trip of conspira- even identity crises. Bisexuality is still a taboo in Christian, biforum.haz.ch cy theories and chases along the way. But the best both the heterosexual and gay scenes. part is Smith’s open and natural bisexual attitude, biforum.haz.ch is meant to be a place where this which is being widely accepted by everyone else. The challenge can be dealt with and a new sexual identity “bad” word bisexual is even mentioned and it’s okay might be developed. Different ways in which bisexua- to sleep with both men and women. It may not be a Thomas Dekker with director Gregg Araki lity can be expressed are stated here. 8 9 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 Concept seminar 2013: Winged visions

At past concept seminars there was always a lot of Specifically this means that a survey needs tobe pessimism and fear that the association might have conducted by an interest group in order to create a to dissolve. But in the end we always parted ways basis for further work. Furthermore the plan is to mo- with an optimistic mindset. dernise the website for a more contemporary appea- 2013 was different. From the beginning there were rance. We will also embed services such as RSS, Face- active discussions and members who couldn’t be the- re sent others to voice their ideas. Early March around 20 people met in Syke near Bre- men in the West Wing, a beautiful house that also houses psychiatric patients who work in a number small workshops. The guided tour through the house was wonderful and the residents reported on Sunday that they were very happy to have had our group of visitors there. West wing But of course, primarily we were there to work. The Saturday agenda called for the general assembly, the activity report of the board, treasurer’s report, re- lieving of the old board, election of the new board, Collecting points – Peter and Astrid reports from the project group, and the adoption of the budget. out the forum: aktionsforum.bine-forum.de. The discussions were heated at times, after all there On Sunday we were greeted by a snowy landscape are quite a few strong personalities in the group. John and, like at every concept seminar, took a look ahead John introduced a new concept for the BiNe reform. at the things to come – and some even felt the wings Relevant points are: from our hostel’s name. • Survey the needs and situation of members and book, Google+ und Twitter. We are probably going to Frank queer as well as non-monosexual individuals, hire an external company to do the job. Lastly, the • Redesigning of the Bisexual Network website, aim is to get more involved in political work again. • Realignment of the club images and aggressive And in the registration for open meeting we intend public relations, to reserve 10% of the available spots for newbies. • Changes to existing meetings and new meetings Despite all that, all agree that there should be no 2014, expectations set on the individual work groups who Honourable desire • Supporting the board and base work. volunteer to do this work. The concept was already discussion – Your commitment to self-determined sexuality topic on Friday and then again on Sunday. We welcomed Mac of the bi commu- Like many other organisations and groups that ad- and lesbians would be the first to mention. A lot of nity Liebe-Leben-Leuten (www.liebe- vocate freedom, self-determination, and concerns of it was made possible through voluntary work as well leben-leute.de) as guest, who advised a particular group of people, the Bisexual Network as a resolute appearance to fight for visibility and a us on the website and told us of his (BiNe e.V) is built on volunteer work. place in society. bi flyer concept. According to Wikipedia, volunteer work is generally For all those that – like us at BiNe e.V. – love more The new board consists of David, considered an altruistic activity and is intended to than one gender, this has not yet been realised. Sure, Hartmut and Jasmin. promote good or improve human quality of life with the media covers the topic every once in a while, but There are several active work groups. no financial gain. usually in a more flashy and colourful angle. We are Telephone counseling, bi with disabi- This type of volunteer work is especially fun when the “others”, the abnormal ones. Many straight peop- lities, BiJou, group list, info packet, you pursue goals along with like-minded people, that le, and even lesbians and gays hold prejudice against International contacts, internet, and enrich yourself and the group. You meet new people, us. And it’s up to us to change that – if that’s what organisation of the open meetings. work in a goal-oriented fashion and successes have we want. an impact on one’s surroundings, one’s own life. This will not happen overnight. It takes a lot of pati- Those who are interested are invited Many groups all over the country have proven what ence, a common vision, a strong group and network. to get in touch with BiNe e.V. or check can be achieved based on mere commitment. For The Bisexual Network offers a good basis for this. It’s Work self-determined sexuality the achievements of gays an association that fights for self-determined sexua- 10 11 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 lity because the expression of sexuality is as diverse • many political parties have a local contact person It said that young men were being encouraged to that a man who sleeps with another man can be gay, as the people expressing it. We don’t use the encyc- for the LGBT community. Try contacting them and join team sports from an early age, to teach them to bisexual, or even a heterosexual who just happened lopaedia definition of bisexuality, because we include ask them if they take non-monosexuals/bisexuals compete with one another. And that violence played to have had sex with a man. people who don’t (want to) live and love monose- into account. a role in these sports as well and would likely lead to Upon requestioning, the young men changed their xually. There are all kinds of people. Trans* meets In addition to these suggestions, there are a lot of homophobia and “hypermasculinity”. The one-time previous definition of “bisexual” and acknowledged Cis, young meets old, tantric meets sadomasochistic, other things that can be done from walking at the rule in terms of same sex experiences leads to sexual that one could for instance be 5% attracted to men people with disability meet people without, monoga- CSD to setting up an info booth at town festivals or orientation being limited to hetero- and homosexua- and 95% attracted to women. The existence of bise- mous meets polygamous, etc. even open conversations with acquaintances, friends, lity and this dualism denies bisexuality. xuality was clearly accepted despite the lack of per- At BiNe e.V. we follow the pleasure principle. If so- and family about one’s sexuality and the wishes and Back in 1995 Schwartz reported that a drop of homo- sonal contact with bisexual men. meone would like to do something, he looks for peo- fears that are associated with it. sexuality, according to society, immediately made a One man questioned why bisexual women were admi- ple who want to go in the same direction. Maybe an Naturally BiNe e.V. is happy about every single lovely man gay, while a drop of heterosexuality didn’t even red but bisexual men weren’t seen as equally “cool”. opinion will be picked up from others to determine person that wants to get involved in the association minimally affect him. Furthermore the rigid labels for sexual orientation the goal. Then they put their idea into practise, for itself. Be it public relations, networking, the orga- Anderson/Adams wrote that the restriction into were questioned. as long as it brings them pleasure. nisation of meetings, local groups, etc. – we look homo- and heterosexuality limited sexual behaviour 3. “Recognising one’s own bisexuality.” The drawback – you can’t say “I want you to do this.” forward to welcoming you to our ranks! and emotional range. In times of strong homopho- Although none of the men identified as bisexual, a If someone wants something he either has to take it bia homosexual contact was frowned upon because it lot of them recognised indicators of bisexual tenden- in his own hands or he can join existing groups. So in John stood for insecurity and weakness. It would go so far cies and (slightly) bisexual behaviour, such as: the end only those projects that enough people are as to lead to gay hysteria and any type of physical • Kissing a male friend, passionate about are realised. * Cis people are people who identify with the sex that they contact between members of the same sex would be • Having been to a gay bar, It is an honourable desire to fight for one’s self-de- were biologically assigned with at birth. In contrast, trans* avoided since even a mere hug might entail sexual • (Friendly) love for the best friend (one referred to termined sexuality and against societal norms. people perceive a discrepancy between the sex they were as- desire. But would homosexual tendencies be unco- it as “bromance”) signed with and the one they identify with. Some of you might say, “I do want to do something vered in a “real men’s sport” such as football this • Ranking of self on a scale from 0 (100% hetero- now, but I don’t know what.” perception of the world would fall apart. sexual) to 10 (100% homosexual) which resulted I’ve listed a few suggestions for the benefit of those And that’s exactly what Anderson, Adams, and their in 0 (12 men), 1 (32 men), 2 (12 men), and 3 (4 people (for a lot of things you don’t even have to be crew did. They interviewed 60 footballers between men) which, in my opinion, can be considered as a member of BiNe e.V.): the ages of 18 and 22 from three different univer- a 13% homosexual rate on average, • Have a look if you can find a group for non-mo- sities in the US, one of which being a rather con- • Joking about one’s sexual identity, nosexual/bisexual people near you where you can servative establishment. Six coloured and two Latin • Statements like “We’re all a little bi, aren’t we?” engage yourself. Sometimes groups like that can American men were part of the study as well. The 4. “Old myths die slowly.” definitely use a fresh new point of view. crew accompanied the men for ten days during foot- Despite everything, a few of the football players still • Form your own local group for non-monosexual/ ball season. The members of Anderson and Adams‘ had some false preconceptions, for instance that bi- bisexual people. Make sure you feel comfortable team integrated themselves well and at times were sexuals are confused, that bisexuality was just a pha- doing it. If you need organising tips, get in touch no longer perceived as observers. se on the way to homosexuality, that bisexuals were with BiNi e.V., they’ve got more than enough ex- permanently horny or neurotic. But these prejudices perience. The results were as follows: only came from a few of the guys and weren’t set in • Go to local discussion groups, lesbian and gay 1. “Decreasing homophobia leads to decreasing stone. groups included. Share your position on the topic biphobia.” Overall, the study showed that since the research and your opinion on sexuality. Statements like “It doesn’t matter who you love,” conducted by Herek und Capitanio in 1995, where 64 were the rule. Some of the kickers even had gay % of men considered homosexuals “disgusting”, a lot friends. Only two individuals made homophobic has changed. statements. The others also didn’t have a problem As previously mentioned, none of the football players with men showing a romantic or sexual interest in identified as bisexual. The terms “gay” and “straight” The end of the one-time rule! them. They either felt flattered or didn’t care. were not so sexualised according to Anderson/Adams Although there was mention of gay as well as bisexu- and were preferably used as opposed to “a little gay” For a long time in the past, when a man kissed ano- xuality was not being denied, and some were even al men in the questions posed, the responses usually for instance. ther man even just one time, or even had sex with said to have recognized a certain amount of bisexual referred to gay men. However, in this case the term him, it meant that he was and would forever be gay. tendencies in themselves. “gay” seemed to be inclusive of “bisexual”. The foot- In my opinion the study suggests further develop- Now, a study by Anderson & Adams published in the In BiJou 24 we reported on Dr. Eric Anderson’s rou- ballers also claimed to have nothing against friend- ment in the acceptance of bisexuality in the western American Journal of Bisexuality claims that this sing appearance at the BiReCon 2010 and on his bi- ships with bisexual men, but didn’t personally know world. mindset has become outdated. The study revolved sexuality-positive studies. any (outed) bisexuals. around 60 young footballers who were observed and I would like to talk a little bit about the article 2. “Complex understanding of bisexuality.” Frank interviewed. “Aren’t We All a Little Bisexual?: The Recognition of The one time rule was depicted as absurd by the in- Even though most of them didn’t have bisexual Bisexuality in an Unlikely Place” by Eric Anderson terviews. A fluid sexual orientation and wide sexual friends or acquaintances, the level of acceptance is und Adi Adams from the Journal of Bisexuality, 11:3- range was recognised. One footballer said that maybe said to have been quite high, the existence of bise- 22, 2011. his grandfather still thought in that old mindset but 12 13 Das ultimative Bi-Quiz BiJou 27 BI Quiz: Answer 1 BI Quiz: Answer 2 BI Quiz: Answer 3 Six times sex B B C

IIn the series Dynasty Al Thomas Mann Michael Page designed the One Four Corley, later Jack Coleman, (1875–1955) was married bi flag in 1998 with the Mareike Sven I was itching for it again last week. Yes, female hor- My biggest fantasy? The glory hole in the darkroom played sensitive Steven to Katia Mann, but secret- colours magenta, lavender, mones need some balancing once in a while, too... of my favourite club. I’m kneeling in front of it and Daniel Carrington, who ly heeded an (unrequited) royal blue. Magenta So I called Maik. We’ve got similar names, similar one after another dicks appear in front of my face, was in alternating love for young boys which represents same-sex likes and are not in love – good conditions for spen- which I then... relationships with men is apparent in his works attraction, royal blue the ding a nice evening. My absolute no go? The glory hole in the darkroom of It was like it always is, hot, hot, hot! my favourite club. and women, but was Buddenbrooks, The Magic attraction to the opposite I’m itching again today. As much as the thought of someone else’s semen in never officially referred to Mountain, and Death in sex and lavender stands I hope Maik is itching, too! my face and mouth excites me – my health is more as bisexual. Venice. for the entire gender important. spectrum. Two Lars Five I’m straight. I’m not one for one night stands. So far Lena I’ve been in four long-term relationships. I only got A few years ago I was sleeping with a guy. We knew tested for HIV because a friend of an ex girlfriend each other well and he knew that I wasn’t on the pill. BI Quiz: Answer 4 BI Quiz: Answer 5 BI Quiz: Answer 6 wrote me on Facebook. While I was still enjoying foreplay, I suddenly felt his C A C I’m straight and positive. penis inside me. I looked at him, horrified. He smiled reassuringly and said “Don’t worry, I can control it. Early 2013 issue 116 of The 1994 bi film classic The kinsey scale goes from Three Thanks to Tantra I know when to pull out.” Silke What I found shocking was the ease with which he the Bi Community News with Lara Flynn Boyle, from 0 (exclusively hetero- My girlfriend and I are in an open relationship. We alone, without even asking me, made a decision that (bicommunitynews.co.uk) Stephen Baldwin and Josh sexual) over five bisexual are living together and each of us is free to get with concerned us both. was released. The magazi- Charles is called Threeso- grades to 6 (exclusively other people. ne is thinner than the me. It’s about a love homosexual), so seven Safe sex? If I get intimate with a man not using a Six condom is out of the question. Me BiJou but is published triangle in which Eddy grades in total. Both of us find dental dams extremely unsexy. Besi- I had a lot of encounters with people. What I wish for more frequently. The loves Stuart, Stuart loves In addition there is grade des, a woman can’t really get anything from another and also live myself is that everyone takes responsi- editor-in-chief’s Alex, and Alex loves Eddy. X which stands woman anyway. bility for themselves. Of course I do pay attention name is Jen. for asexuality. And if we somehow do catch chlamydia or something to my partner, is he/she feeling alright, does it feel we’ll just take antibiotics. right between the two (three) of us? The wonderful encounters are definitely worth it. But what is safe and more importantly, which risks are worth taking and which aren’t – that’s something I want to decide for myself. Being able to talk with the other person about our ideas, and to then go for BI Quiz: Answer 7 BI Quiz: Answer 8 BI Quiz: Answer 9 it together, is one of the most erotic foreplays I can B B C think of.

Being able to decide on your own desires is the gre- The bi symposion was held Terviseks is pronounced Elizabeth Gill’s film Gold- atest feeling imaginable. in Berlin in 1996 with the Der Bi-Sex (dea-bee-sex – fish Memory (2003) is set Mara motto The many faces of German for the bi sex) and in Dublin. As the charac- bisexuality – the diversity means Cheers. ters switch partners, of bisexual relationships. gender and sex are not Attendees included Fritz really an issue. New blogger at bisexualitaet.org The bi blog that fights for bisexual visibility and deals with political Klein, Oswalt Kolle and Dr. The film is light and cheer- issues regarding bisexuality, is welcoming a new face: Julia, a bisexual Erwin J. Haeberle. ful and is therefore a queer feminist! Have a look: http://www.bisexualitaet.org/2013/03/eine- pleasure to watch for all neue-mitbloggerin-julia/#more-1878 (German) bisexuals. Short URL: http://bit.ly/YGW5YW 14 The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: Question 3 Question 2 Question 1 Question 10 Question 11 Question 12

What are the three colours Which German author was What is the name of the Which country still hadn’t Which bisexual popstar got What was the religion of of the International bi flag? married but had a secret bisexual son of an oil legalised same-sex marria- sued for $10.5 million by the man who in 1200 AD weakness for young boys? millionair in a famous ge by 2012? Russian activists in St. wrote, “He who claims that soap? Petersburg due to he experiences no sexual “Gay Propaganda“ desire [when looking at beautiful male youths] is a A – Pink, violet, dark blue A – Franz Kafka A – Bobby Ewing A – Czech Republic A – David Bowie liar.“? B – Pink, purple, blue B – Thomas Mann B – Steven Carrington B – South Africa B – Lady Gaga C – Magenta, lavender, C – Hermann Hesse C – Dominik Gerner C – Iceland C – Madonna A – Islam royal blue B – Christianity C – Hinduism

The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: Question 6 Question 5 Question 4 Question 13 Question 14 Question 15

How many grades for Where does this quote What does BCN stand for? When was What did scientist J. Michael Who is Kyrsten Sinema? profiling sexual orientation come from: “You have the BiNe e.V. founded? Bailey use in a dubious study does the Kinsey Scale hots for me, I have the hots which resulted in the NYT have? for him, and sooner or later article claiming that bisexuali- he's gonna have the hots ty in men does not exist? for you. - Sounds pretty hot A – 5 to me.”? A – Bisexual Church A – August 29th, 1992 A – Colonoscope A – US Politician B – 6 Network B – October 23rd, 1990 B – Plethysmograph B – British professor C – 7 A – Threesome B – Bisexual Cyber Notes C – July 26th, 1994 C – MRI for sex education B – Basic Instinct C – Bisexual Community C – Australian actress C – Chasing Amy News

The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: The BI Quiz: Question 9 Question 8 Question 7 Question 16 Question 17 Question 18

IIn which city does the If you hear Der Bi-Sex what year did the 4th Which breed of monkey has Which song‘s music video When is Celebrate romantic comedy Goldfish (dea-bee-sex – German for International a pronounced bisexual shows two men and one Bisexuality Day? Memory take place? the bi sex) in Estonian, it Bisexual Symposium (IBIS) orientation? woman taking turns means what? take place in Berlin? kissing?

A – Oslo A – Vagina A – 1992 A – Gorillas A –Diamonds by Rihanna A – May 17th B – Amsterdam B – “Cheers!” B – 1996 B – Bonobos B – One Day/Reckoning B – June 28th C – Dublin C – a curse word C – 2001 C – Chimpanzees Song by Asaf Avidan C – September 23rd C – Try by P!NK BiJou 27 BI Quiz: Answer 12 BI Quiz: Answer 11 BI Quiz: Answer 10 A C A What to do against homophobia?

Muslim Hanbalite jurisconsul Madonna was aware of Up until now the Czech Ibn al-Gauzi wrote: "He who the consequences, but did Republic does not allow claims that he experiences no it anyway. same-sex marriage. In desire [when looking at Her August 2012 concert 2006 South Africa became beautiful male youths] is a in St. Petersburg saw the 5th country to legalise One one hand the world is incre- And later on the reference group since 1945 and the emancipation liar, and if we could believe rainbow flags with “no same-sex marriag and asingly becoming more accepting. plays a crucial role. In a worst case movements of gays and lesbians In more and more (western) coun- scenario they allow me to think in the 60s and 70s. Also the in- him he would be an animal, fear” written on them, Iceland the 9th in 2010. By tries gay marriage is being lega- and act in a way that is normally fluence of the Catholic church is not a human being," and, like pink bracelets, and a 4 2012 there were 11 coun- lised and in Germany the Constitu- not socially acceptable and sup- stronger in other places. many other Muslim spirituals, minute speech against tries who’d opened marri- tional Court has decided that the ports my position which I would However there are also counter-ex- acknowledged bisexuality homophobia. age to same-sex couples. adoption of children by rainbow normally never admit to. That is amples. In the traditionally stron- families may not be prohibited, the basic mechanism. gly Catholic kingdom of Spain, gay as natural. no matter how reluctant or reac- People who are insecure due to marriage has been equal to hete- tionary the current government is unemployment, policital uncer- rosexual marriage since 2005. Ap- approaching the subject. tainty, or whatever else, tend to parently there are many different BI Quiz: Answer 15 BI Quiz: Answer 14 BI Quiz: Answer 13 On the other hand homophobia is look for minority groups to project factors involved when a minori- A B A more present than ever in the eas- their anger onto. People who use ty or even larger parts of society tern states. Under the pretense of violence perceive themselves as think and act homophobic. Some Kyrsten Sinema, born in With help of a plethysmo- The Bisexual Network was alleged protection for children the powerful which gives them even factors are easier to point out, Russian Duma seems to be pushing more confirmation. In Southeas- some we can but guess on. 1976, is the first openly graph, Bailey attempted to founded August 29th, the dubious law against “gay pro- tern Europe it’s the Roma that bisexual US Congresswo- measure bloodflow to the 1992, although some older paganda”, and other countries’ have to serve as the scapegoat, in But homophobia is sick. What do man in history. penis. The study and issues erroneously claim governments consider these kinds Russia it’s the Jews. therapists or science have to say She was appointed in newspaper article were the year 1994. of laws sensible as well. about it? The retired pope is being praised How can this way of thinking be Be careful. Others’ unwanted Arizona and is a member of debunked. In the meantime by chancellor Merkel instead of explained on a deeper level? points of view, albeit objectively the democrat party. studies with completely being criticised because of his ab- Psychodynamic studies confirm being viewed as “wrong” beha- different results have been use cover-ups, and there are still that people that are extremely vior, still can’t be called “sick”. published. A colonoscope is 79 countries worldwide where ho- hostile towards the gay, lesbian, Referring to anything or –one as mosexual acts are still punishable and bi community use their hatred sick is derogatory and stigmati- used in colonoscopy, an MRI by law, in seven of which it may to attempt to surpress their own sing. It begins with the choice of is a brain scan. even be punishable by death. homosexual tendencies. It scares words. Calling somebody “sick” is We spoke with Thomas, a therapist them subconsciously to be the putting a label on him, since it’s from Hamburg specialised among same way, or to possibly become something he “is”. Someone “has BI Quiz: Answer 18 BI Quiz: Answer 17 BI Quiz: Answer 16 others in coming out issues, about “infected”, as absurd as that may a sickness” might be more approp- C B B homophobia, its causes and coun- sound. “My son might end up gay riate. If someone “has” something ter-strategies. if he hangs out with them,” – the- at least there’s the possibility of se types of statements show how getting rid of it. Celebrate Bisexuality Day is It’s the No.1 hit One The Bonobos are even Where does this incredibly strong threatening being “different” is The use of the term “sickness” the brainchild of the bise- Day/Reckoning Song of the considered a fully bisexual homophobia that goes as far as vi- being perceived, because it ques- is increasingly being discussed xual US activists: Wendy Isreali folk rock musician species. There are also olent acts towards homosexuals in tions their domineering image of and viewed with criticism. For Curry, Michael Page, who Asaf Avidan. “ One day many other species with some countries come from? masculinity. one, more and more sicknesses This question has been bothering and disorders are being thought also designed the bi flag, baby, we'll be old, and proven bisexual behaviour social scientists, politicians, pa- But in Germany that’s become a up and it’s not exactly helping, and Gigi Raven Wilbur. It think of all the stories that such as beetles, bats, rents, and countless others for a thing of the past. instead they give people the per- was first observed on we could have told.” dolphins, penguins, etc. while now. Yes, where does such I actually don’t agree. Strong ho- fect excuse for living questiona- September 23rd, 1999. extreme apparently baseless hat- mophobia can be found everywhe- ble lifestyles. Also, doctors and red come from? Social psycholo- re. The fact that it’s more evident the pharmaceutical industry often gists primarily deem certain soci- in Eastern Europe, Africa and some suggest treatment where it is not alisation as responsible. Prejudice parts of Asia is probably due to necessarily needed, in cases like a is often passed on to children. our relatively democratic tradition recent incident where an “obsessi- 19 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 vely healthy diet” was considered it is often seen in court ordered You mentioned that you’ve been pulist has really been successful. The psychotherapeutic medical a mental illness. therapies for violent hooligans or to Poland. What were your expe- That, in my eyes, is pure fortune. practicioner Thomas Östreicher, notorious DUI speeding offenders riences? I also think that young women born in 1960, works as conversa- But these people have lost touch for instance. If the individual lacks A few years ago I visited Krakow should never forget that the achie- tion and Gestalt therapist in Ham- with reality. insight, every therapy is bound to with a friend. The gay owner of vements in terms of equality so far burg with focus on coming out I wouldn’t go that far. Still, a real fail. While insight may develop as our small holiday flat immediate- didn’t just fall from the sky and (www.hamburg-psychotherapie. phobia is a serious disorder that the therapy progresses, this is qui- ly warned us to avoid any type of must be secured and developed info). many suffer from. Well-known ex- te rare. physical contact – we knew kissing every day anew. And like the rest amples are fear of heights or ani- was out of the question but hol- of the rainbow community, bise- Recommended reading with mal phobias in which behavioural So there’s nothing we can do about ding hands was as well and even xuals must not relent their efforts many further references: http:// therapists are being attributed these people? hugging. Even downtown during for acceptance. Presenting oneself en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homophobia rapid treatment successes. I don’t There is. For instance if a father re- the day time. Otherwise we could with srength and confidence is the consider the “homophobia” we’re alises that he is losing touch with get into trouble. And trouble me- first step. Note: In queer studies the term talking about as an anxiety disor- his gay son and suffers immensely, ant, verbal abuse if we’re lucky, “heterosexism” is now being used der but as a term that represents like “It’s terrible that he has this probably being physically attacked Interview conducted by Frank instead of “homophobia” and “mo- passive or aggressive rejection of horrible flaw that is causing us to or beaten up. And Krakow is sup- nosexism” instead of “biphobia”, lesbian, gay, or bisexual people. drift apart, it hurts me,” and he posedly anything but conserva- to stress that the hatred does not And violent bullies don’t exactly turns to a therapist at this point, tive. It’s known to be more of a represent a sickness. look anxious or afraid to me. there is a chance that he may be liberal university town. What must Roughly speaking a so called men- able to grow past it. If the father, it be like in other parts of Poland, tal disorder with clinical signifi- with professional help, manages then? Feeling this atmosphere so cance begins when a person suf- to lay down his beliefs, prejudices, evidently was pretty shocking. fers under significant limitations and accusations and accepts a new Luckily nothing happened but we in social and emotional functio- way of thinking, then there may did behave and acted totally he- ning. But we know that homopho- come a time when he will be able terosexual. bic, baseball bat swinging guys on to objectively look at his homo- the other hand can also be good phobia and recognise the defense Is there even a way to talk to the- friends and colleagues. We can mechanism hiding beneath it. se notorious homophobes if they diagnose them with poor impulse The people who, as part of a mob, are so set in their plans of “abo- control, antisocial behaviour, and beat up and nearly killed homose- lishing” homosexuality? What can other things, but whom are we hel- xuals in Poland, Hungary, and el- we do to encourage positive deve- ping by defining violence against sewhere would first need to deve- lopment? gays, lesbians, and bisexuals as an lop insight that there is something We can always talk, but do they illness? Granted, it’s inacceptable wrong with their actions. But why want that as well? We have to at and, depending on the severity, would they? Their governments, least try and keep doing in Eastern a violation against human rights, political parties, courts and the Europe what we did in Germany the respective country’s constitu- media encourage them in their be- that lead to the abolishment of § tion, morality, and Christianity’s haviour. 175 and the implementation of the simple commandment of “love thy right to adopt – dialogue and per- neighbour” – but it’s not sick. The What drives politicians to put all sistent education on all channels, same way being a neo Nazi is not their energy into opposing the coupled with external pressure BiNet USA has published bisexual fact sheet: sick. An in our opinion distorted rights of homo- and bisexuals (for instance if German politicians • Half of the LGBT community is bisexual. socio-politic point of view alone is instead of worrying about issues were to go there to campaign for • In comparison with lesbians and gays, bisexuals have a higher lifetime not a sickness. likes unemployment, education or human rights). It takes time and prevalence of sexual victimisation. the economy? won’t be easy but I don’t see any • Bisexuals are at least one-third less likely to disclose their bisexual Is there such thing as therapy for Easy. Stirring up hatred against other way. identities to their doctors than gay men or lesbians. homophobic people in Germany? certain groups distracts from the In our country this much-desired • 40% of LGBT People of Colour identify as bisexual. I’m not aware of it being specifi- real problems. Comparisons with tolerance still isn’t as extensive • Bi women are almost 6 times more likely than heterosexual women to have cally offered, let alone as a “re- the Nazi period are usually prob- as it should be though, especially seriously considered suicide, and 4 times more likely than lesbians. education measure”. Generally lematic, but what we are seeing outside the major cities. Hungary • Bisexual employees are eight times more likely to be in the closet com- precondition for any type of the- in Eastern Europe is following the is a good example to show that pared to homosexuals. rapy is a willingness to undergo pattern of 1933 with the slogan democratic societies can regress • From 2008 to 2012 only $5,000 in grants were awarded to bi specific pro- the treatment and to actively par- “The Jews are our downfall!” Un- back to authoritarian systems. In jects or bisexual organizations (out of over $100 million tracked) ticipate. Otherwise it will never fortunately that kind of thing usu- post-war Germany, unlike most of 2013 Bisexual Fact Sheet“, http://binetusa.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/2013- be more than an alibi measure as ally works best. our neighbours, no right-wing po- bisexual-fact-sheet.html, Short URL: http://bit.ly/YGVO8n 20 21 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 Meschede rocks! Where’s a man a man? Where fox and bisexuals bid each other good night Bi men’s meeting 2013 in Göttingen

The third men’s meeting once treat one another with respect, on, sex, whatever anyone wanted. 1999 – 2001 – 2002 – 2006 – rather with the people that we workshop, two jeux dramatique again took place at the Wald- tolerance and warmth, because On the other hand, I didn’t see the 2010 – 2012: These are the years meet at the BiNe meetings. sessions about airships, male self- schlösschen where it will also be our bisexuality in its breadth and exclusion of women as a particu- in which the BiNe men’s meeting Like all of our meeting houses, the gratification, a meditation work- held next year. Like every time diversity requires and entails it. larly positive thing. If asked what has taken place in Meschede. The Matthias-Claudius-Haus lies quite shop, naked yoga, “20 years of there was a sauna evening, won- It’s so different as opposed to my the mixed meetings could offer last time I went was six years ago hidden, far away from civilisation. BiNe – attempt at a speech“, and derful encounters, a jeux drama- heterosexuality dominated regular that this one couldn’t, I wouldn’t because I missed the 2010 mee- But that’s what makes it so attrac- an active workshop “The future of tique and interesting conversa- life, and I use this opportunity to be able to come up with an answer. ting, 2006 was also the meeting tive. It’s like entering an oasis of BiNe”. tions. However, there were some draw the strength I need to brave (Thomas) at which Martin and I distributed emotion and relaxation. After things that have changed. The en- regular life. our first BiJou together – the few going up the stairs you’d see vironment was freer (which wasn’t (Wolli) copies we had were literally ripped an open room with a central to everybody’s favour), Michael Hello men, from our hands and we were pretty fireplace, a library, and cosy has passed the organisation for The big event at the men’s mee- This is the new organisational damn proud of it! seating possibilities. A few next year on to Christoph and Ralf ting: The two organisers lay down team of the future BiNe men’s Now – in the fall of 2012 – I‘m steps further there’s the kiosk and sexually the meeting has got- the leadership on day one. The meetings. in Meschede once again and BiNe and access to the group rooms. ten a lot more liberal since 2011 men themselves put the pieces The men’s meeting in the coming just happens to be celebrating its Further up the stairs are the – which doesn’t mean that it was back together, into a new shape year already falls under our, Ralf 20th anniversary! The party motto dining room and the hallways just all about sex, in fact, for some and it worked despite springs and and Christoph’s, responsibility. is “The golden 20s“, we’ve brought leading to the rooms. it wasn’t about sex at all. And fi- cracks. I look forward to the next We’ve taken over the organisation the new BiJou 26 along, and there Intensive new contacts are nally this year’s workshops were a meeting. from Michael and are excited to is going to be a picture show with formed as usual, but also, old lot more structured. Among others (Roland) see how we will manage to carry many many familiar faces from all friendships are rekindled with At the party we were treated to there were the fetish workshop, on Michael’s established and suc- the meetings that we’ve been to many wonderful people. a sample of the Charleston work- team bulding, the HumanMetrics Exciting workshops, great men, cessful programme. over the years. It’s all very emo- The different workshops offer so- shop which had us all wanting personality test, jeux dramatique: and lots of male energy! I was Michael, we would definitely like tional because there are so many mething for every taste: BDSM – more. A long night of free and wild Leatherstocking Tales, sperm – finally able to attend the BiNe to thank you for making the BiNe emotions and memories we asso- Theory & Practise (2 workshops), dancing followed. The outfits were desire and frustration and tantric men’s meeting and I can’t wait for men’s meeting what it is today – ciate with the BiNe meetings, or Charleston – the dance, a film once again imaginative, beautiful, massages. the next one! Thank you! with great dedication and commit- and stylish. One bi woman said, (Frank) (Walter) ment. This will serve as our moti- “Finally the men are showing their vation. We’ve got big shoes to fill. chic side!” Those who have been to a BiNe The jeux dramatique “Leathersto- Let’s see if we can fill them as well Meschede may be a beautiful place meeting will be able to tell you cking Tales“ was super dramatic. as you did. After all there are two but the best thing about it are and that afterwards heart and head are The death at the stake triggered of us… ;-) always will be the people that en- swimming with positive impressi- several therapeutic processes and We wish you all the best – for all counter each other there. ons and experiences, you’d be able was pure self discovery. Unfor- the things you now have time for Frank to talk about it for hours. And at tunately the LoBBi and the erotic again! the same time it’s difficult to put part of the meeting kind of faded With this in mind, dear men, we in words, which defines the magic to the background because of it. look forward to seeing you soon of the BiNe meetings. How can I (Stefan) at the next men’s meeting at the describe the men’s meeting 2013 Waldschlösschen! in a mere few sentences? Open arms in all directions! Christoph and Ralf I have to limit myself to what was (Jens) very important to me aside from BiNe men’s meeting 2014 all the other beautiful and posi- An especially beautiful experi- Where? – Akademie Waldschlöss- tive things at this meeting – it’s ence. There’s no need for expli- chen (Göttingen, www.waldschlo- always overwhelming to be among cit leadership, if need be we can esschen.org) people that feel the same way I organise ourselves (and accept When? – February 6-9 2014 (Thu– do. Because then I can really be that we can’t have some of the Sun) myself without having to bend things we’re used to from the big More information on bine.net un- over trying to pretend I’m so- meetings like theme parties with der “Treffen/Offene Treffen“ (not mething that I’m not. The friends games and DJs, but we DID have available in English) that I’ve met there are mindful and a LoBBi of course). There was op- Matthias-Claudius-House sensitive towards each other and portunity for meeting, conversati- 22 23 Aus dem TONIC: Wir wollen keine Telefone sein BiJou 27 BiJou 27 We often encounter interesting things by accident. It was completely by accident that I stumbled upon an just as often to Berlin where he meets one of his We are not obliged to disclose anything but we do of- interview of the editor in chief of a new youth magazine called Tonic. My interest in this magazine was piqued other girlfriends. Notker, who lives there, is currently ten tell each other about the people we are currently by several things I heard about it. Like this new magazine was said to be completely free of advertisements, it fully occupied with his studies, his part time job in interested in. I’m happy for Esther when she spends was produced by volunteers, and young people used it to write about things that interest them. Even though parliament, his political engagement and our relati- a night with another woman. Notker listens intently I didn’t really fall into the age group the magazine was trying to reach – I wanted to read, too! onship – there’s no time for anyone else. when I tell him about John. I went for it and it was worth it. The first time I met John and Notker at the same time The polyamorous refer to this feeling as “joy reso- Among lots of interesting articles I found the following article “We don’t want to be telephones “. I contacted I was really nervous. They were sitting in Notkers nance”. Notker thinks that the preference for poly-re- the editor as well as Lisa, the author of the article, and voila, we – the BiJou – got our hands on an article apartment at the dinner table when I entered the lationships is a sexual orientation just like heterose- about polyamorous life. room. I hugged them both and sat in the middle. xuality. The only difference is that polyamory doesn’t We are proud to present you Lisa’s article, first published in Tonic magazine, as well as a short description of Then they carried on their conversation about po- conform to social norms. Whoever lives polyamorous- how she defines herself and what the term bisexual means to her. lice violations at the last Castor transport. I obser- ly is forced to keep having to come out as “abnormal” Mara ved them and waited for the first signs of jealousy. or to deny their own lifestyle. In that sense polyamo- But I couldn’t spot any. I spent the night in Notker’s rous people deal with the same challenges anyone bed and John slept on the living room couch. Two who isn’t heterosexual does. conflict-free days and nights later we were all excited Esther is sometimes asked if she has a boyfriend. about how easy it was to spend time as a threesome. Most of the time she answers honestly and says that We don’t want to be telephones. Nowadays Notker, John, Esther and I have gotten she is in an open relationship with a woman. So she used to us all meeting up and hanging out together. manages to deviate from the norm twice in one sen- It’s evening in Mainz now. Esther and I are sitting on tence. The author Lisa Bendiek is involved in three rela- we spent together he explicitly warned me that he wobbly plastic chairs in the garden of a squat and are That doesn’t always go smoothly. “A polyamorous tionships – with Esther, John and Norker. didn’t want a relationship, “In a relationship it’s like sharing a vegan pina colada. A few metres further the lesbian like myself is a totally strange concept for And for this she needs a lot of time and a thick you’re suddenly ‘occupied’, like a telephone.” Notker campfire is crackling, a punk with purple hair is play- most. You don’t usually encounter women who sleep skin against prejudice. didn’t want to be ‘occupied’ by me, didn’t want me to ing guitar. “You guys are so cute together,” Daniela, with a lot of other women outside of porn. Some raise any claim on him. That’s why he was relieved to a friend of Esther’s says, “One might think that you men will then be incapable of thinking of anything At the foot of the stairs of Mainz train station Esther hear about my boyfriend at the time. guys were in a monogamous relationship.” Daniela other than this absurd porn portrayal of women. I’ve is waiting for me. I haven’t seen her for a month, Esther, John, Notker and I, we don’t want to be tele- knows me, so she’s long given up trying to convert had the displeasure of being hit on along those lines take three steps at a time. Her arms wrap around me, phones. We believe in polyamory. This word is com- Esther and me to monogamy. The relationship bet- as well. After a few beers at a pub an acquaintance hold me tight. “I’m glad you’re here,” she says. “Yes,” posed of the Greek word “poly” – “many” and the ween Esther and I destroys her whole understanding leaned over to me and whispered, “Hey you’re not I say, “I’ve missed you.” Latin word “amor” – “love” and stands for being in of the world. In love, Daniela says, there is only one monogamous right? So does that mean you’ll sleep One month is a long time for me, when I’m in love. love relationships with more than one person at a person in the world that is right for you and that can with anyone?” I’m in love all the time. Usually with several people time. We know that love and desire – in contrast to make you happy. “If you’ve found that person, why do Again and again people mistake polyamory with pro- simultaneously. Currently there are three, and Esther coal, oil, and uranium – are not limited resources. you need anyone else? The two of you are perfect for miscuity. Not that there is anything wrong with the is one of them. Our emotions follow different rules than the batteries one another, there’s no need for anyone else!” Esther latter – having sex with a lot of people that is, but We met for the first time in 2006 at the summer aca- of our mobile phones. That is why we can love several chokes on her pina colada. As she finishes coughing it has as much to do with polyamory as swingers’ demy of the Young Greens – back then I was 16 and people at the same time and have sex with them as she protests, “I’m not looking for a person that will clubs do with monogamy. Polyamory doesn’t rule out still thought feminism a bad word. Esther remembers well. save me from my misery. This perception of romantic promiscuity but it doesn’t implicate it either. And that I used to do cartwheels during coffee breaks. To make sure everyone is okay, we strive for maximum love is an illusion that isn’t worth striving for.” neither of both concepts obligates us to hop into bed Five years later I found out that we both have the honesty. Before I get involved with a new person I Esther has never been in a monogamous relationship with just any idiot that comes along - see example same habit of painting the white IKEA paper lamps tell them about my current relationships. When Es- and doesn’t feel the need to ever be in one. “For above. with watercolours. When I finally ended up with Es- ther and I kissed for the first time, John and Notker me,” she explains, “it’s important to know that my I find it absurd to grant another person the absolute ther, John and Notker were already part of my life. were there. Ever since Ester’s ex-girlfriend moved to girlfriend has someone else or could have somebody right to my body. And Notker can’t imagine giving up John and I have known each other for two years. Scotland I’m her only relationship. else. That way I feel like I can say no. I could lea- his way of thinking out of love for a monogamous When I come back out of the bathroom into his room After my arrival in Mainz she’s standing in the kit- ve without leaving anyone on their own. It makes “dream girl”. “Then I’d have to leave you for her!” he in the mornings he lays in bed with his mobile on chen at the stove and is frying potato pancakes. I me feel free.” This freedom allows her to really get says, horrified. “Besides, I could also turn it around twitter. He can even recite particularly interesting stand behind her and put my head on her shoulder. close to someone without feeling suffocated. And the on her. If I refused to get into a relationship with tweets from memory hours later. In return, John “Do you think you would be able to be in another other way around, she doesn’t want to put the burden this woman it wouldn’t just be because I prefer poly- learned from me that ketchup is vegan but pesto relationship – parallel to ours – with the same inten- of fulfilling all of her needs on just one person. Me- amory, it would be because a monogamous relation- usually isn’t. About a year ago we realised that our sity?” I ask. Without missing a beat she replies, “In anwhile, Daniela is still crying after that one woman ship meant more to her than a relationship with me.” no strings attached affair had turned into a loving terms of emotions, easily – in terms of time, no way.” whom she had expected eternal happiness from, but The next morning I’m woken up by a huge cup of relationship. Time, as opposed to love and desire, is a limited who now wants nothing to do with her. Esther and soy milk coffee under my nose. As always, Esther had Notker is very much into agriculture. Since getting resource. To be able to see my three loved ones regu- Daniela are both convinced that the concept of the gotten up while I was still half-asleep, to prepare together with him, I’ve learned to tell the difference larly I use up a lot of it and often drive from Hamburg other is bound to end in misery. her favourite drug. She pulls back the curtains, the between Holstein cattle and Simmental cattle. Our re- to Goettingen, Mainz and Berlin. My schedule planner The agreement between Esther, Notker, John and I morning light floods into the room. lationship has been going on for two and a half years is calibrated with three others. John, who lives in entail that we are all allowed to sleep, fall in love, Between sips I ask a meaningful question, “Do you now. That surprised us both. Because the first night Goettingen, comes to visit me regularly and travels and enter long-term relationships with other people. think polyamory could make the world a better place?” 24 25 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 Esther takes the cup from my hands, steals a sip of “I’m not polyamorous because I want to make the As an openly ex-heterosexual queer feminist I am Fight for bi politics coffee and thinks. “Monogamy,” she says, “is one of world a better place,” says John. “I’m polyamorous working on making the category “gender” become Kiturak writes about previously the many ways people enslave themselves and others because I just like it better that way.” He thinks for (more) meaningless. unseen, unacknowledged discrimina- without realising it. If monogamy weren’t the only a second and then adds, “But I’d still say that poly- tion against bisexuals under the alternative anymore, if other relationship structures amory is political. Because it questions norms just by Informations about the author: Lisa is 24 years old working title “The reason why bi would be considered normal, a lot of people would be existing. It’s like a demonstration only in reverse.” and is working on her master in Ethnology in Halle can’t be an appendage of gay/les- freer.” I snatch back the cup of coffee. “Yeah, I think John goes on demonstrations for political reasons, an der Saale. She also writes journalistic and literary bian movements”. At first glance it so, too,” I say, “But do you think it would make them fun is just a pleasant side effect. Polyamory on the pieces , for TONIC among others. reads a bit exaggerated until you happier?” “It depends,” Esther says. “On how they other hand, he engages in out of his own perso- realise – if you allow yourself to deal with the freedom.” nal needs, but even by doing that he is forcing a Footnote: be open to the subject – that the A lot of members of the poly community present their change in society. The revolution, if one believes in * Cis people are people who identify with the sex that was arguments actually make a lot of relationship concept as a kind of salvation. As a stra- it, doesn’t only happen in one’s own bed, neither is assigned to them at birth. In contrast, trans* people feel a discrepancy between the gender that was assigned to them sense. http://kiturak.wordpress. tegy to save long years of marriage but still be able it present only in one’s mind or heart. Being happily socially and that which they feel comfortable and identify com/2011/07/08/warum-bi-kein-an- to fall in love again, or as a way to attain spiritual in love with many doesn’t do anything for the climate with. hangsel-schwuler-und-lesbischer- perfection. change, world hunger, racism and sexism. But I can’t bewegungen-sein-kann (German) Others use polyamory to put their criticism of the picture utopia without looking at personal relation- Short URL: http://bit.ly/YGW9Yx capitalist property situation and institutions like mo- ships at all. nogamous heterosexual marriage into action. Esther takes me to Mainz train station. As always I wistfully bid her goodbye. I know that I’ll miss her dearly. On the other hand I’m looking forward to the next few days I’ll be spending with John in Goettin- gen. Ester hugs me, kisses me on the nose and says, “Send my love to John.” TONIC – a home remedy against bigotry. Lisa Bendiek In the summer of 2010 13 school newspaper nerds The first issue is available online at www.tonic-maga- from Bavaria, Hamburg, and Switzerland met up in zin.de. It can also be purchased at individual stores Stuttgart to create a new magazine for young people. in Berlin, München, Leipzig and Dresden. The price is It was an idea born out of late adolescent pride – no up to the buyer. question about it. Idea and concept were vague then, The second issue will appear in November 2013. but the child grew and by June 2011 the website was Fabian up and the question “Who are we?” was beginning to find an answer. TONIC wants to be a platform against the dictator- Selfpresentation of Lisa Bendiek ship of happiness and the cliché of youth that all the other magazines are cultivating. We want to surprise, far away from the logic of the market. What interest I don’t have the best word to describe my sexual ori- two insufficient sections of the broad spectrum of us will interest others as well. entation. What I do know is that there was a time sexuality and gender identity. That is also the reason TONIC decided to forego ads. that I was heterosexual. That time is over. why I don’t like to refer to myself as “bisexual”. The The backgrounds of the over 70 illustrators, photo- I grew up in a Catholic village in the South of Hesse. term indicates that I’m only interested in cis men graphers, and authors that are now working for TO- When I was fourteen and unable to fall for one of my and cis women* and that anything beyond that does NIC differ, not all of them want to be journalists. It male classmates like the rest of my friends, I thought not exist. makes us less susceptible to hypes and keeps us off I might be a lesbian. And then I thought, damn, this But I’m into individuals. Whether they have a penis the beaten tracks. is going to make my life complicated in this homo- or breasts, or both or neither, whether they paint The EU programme Youth in Action offered TONIC phobic world. their nails or have a beard – I consider all these some funding which allowed for the publication of When I was 16 I did fall for one of my male class- things secondary. I don’t understand why “gender” the first printed issue towards the end of 2012. Lisa’s mates. During my first relationship – heterosexual, is such a big factor for a lot of people in deciding polyamory article, a sketch of a repeatedly failed es- monogamous, flowers on valentines and all that jazz on whether they feel sexually attracted to someone. cape from Ghana, and a photo report from a juvenile – I got used to the position of a heterosexual woman. I find it absurd that society expects me to settle on detention centre were included in this issue among And I resigned myself to it. But still I somehow felt one gender to desire, and on precisely one person at others. that I wouldn’t be heterosexual forever. any given point in time. After all, nobody ever asked “Spiegel Online“ congratulated TONIC and spoke As I moved to Hamburg and began my studies at the me if I prefer people with big earlobes over people about its “outsider topics“ – and we asked ourselves University I started moving in queer feminist circles. who are into computers. if this focus on the unconventional could be above It became clear to me that “man” and “woman” were all, evidence of a broader horizon. 26 27 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 In every issue we give you an overview about the bi-friendliness of swinger clubs in a specific postal code LUNA Swingerpark Extra-3 area. This time we’re covering postal code area 3. Maschmühlenweg 50 Im Niedernfeld 21 37081 Göttingen 31542 Bad Nenndorf Hannover Are swinger clubs in postal code area 3 bi-friendly? www.club-luna.de www.swingerpark.com On a Saturday every two months there’s a bi party They’ve got the TundCausH 2.0 party (current ent- (current entrance fees: women free, men 60–75 €, rance fees: women 15 €, men 90 €, couples 70 €) € ADVENTURE 2 bei Magdeburg La Envie couples 20–45 ). “For bi-curious couples, women, with bracelets that among others can also indicate Haldensleber Str. 17 An der Marburger Str. 33 and single men that want to meet similar people bisexuality. Every six weeks the Bi-InJecTion-Party 39179 Ebendorf b. Magdeburg 35117 Münchhausen/Simtshausen in an erotic ambience. Whether women want to be is held as well. “2012 we’ve been very successful in www.adventuretwo.de www.la-envie.de amongst themselves in a special room, make erotic creating a new meeting place for bi/trans* coup- contact with men, or have an exciting experience as les and men...“ Tina is a gay transvestite and has Every 1st Wednesday of the month at 5pm is the Every last Friday of the month they’ve got the Bi party a three(or more)some, everything is allowed so long brought these parties to life, since she didn’t see Goldfisch – Bisex Only Party (current entrance fees: for her and him (current entrance fees: women free, as everyone enjoys. […] since there are also women her life as a drag queen happening in adult movie women - free, men - 49 €): “If you enjoy same-gen- men 100 €, couples 30 €, transvestites 40 €). The who like to watch their man have an erotic experi- theatres – much too negative an environment. The der sex this is the right place for you. Here, your most philosophy of the club, however, states that nobody ence with another man.” well-attended parties (60–120 people, 50 % couples, They also have gay parties (current entrance fees: 25 % TV or single women, 25 % men) have speci- secret desires will come true. … perfect for bisexual is excluded. “Regardless of whether you’re hetero-, € men, couples, women, and trans* with a sense for bi-, or homosexual: If you treat others with respect 30 , trans* free) every 1st and 3rd Wednesday of fic mottos, hotspots like the fireplace room for smo- eroticism and discretion. An insider’s tip for begin- you’re welcome here!” There is a separate room for the month, ”for all gay and bi men that want more”. kes (everything else is non-smoking), and men and ners and the bi-curious, too!” smokers. There is only one room beside the bar where smoking friends only group sex rooms. is allowed. CASA 69 / Swinger Fulda Aspenstr. 19a 36119 Hauswurz www.swingerfulda.com

Bi parties are being held here on (most?) Thursdays. Sometimes it’s called Bi night, sometimes Backdoor man and bi party (current entrance fees: women 15 €, men 110 €, couples 60 €). There’s a separate smoking area. There is said to be a new owner soon.

Club Swing LUNA Halle-Kasseler Str. 100b Room 37318 Hohengandern Whirlpool www.club-swing.de

Sometimes they’ve got A different type of men’s eve- ning with Kati and partner (current entrance fees: women 10 €, men 80 €, couples 40 €). “A very spe- cial evening because Kati and her partner want to be spoiled by a lot of nice men”.

Feelings Swingerclub La Envie Swingerpark Extra-3 Warburger Str. 36 French wall Disco for foam party 34246 Vellmar Gyn chair Tina www.swingerclub-feelings.de

“Bi activities by men are welcome at our bi parties. On other days, it depends on the people. It is defini- tely tolerated, especially within the week.“ Smoking allowed (current entrance fees: men 75–95 €, wo- men free, couples 20–45 €).

28 29 BiJou 27 BiJou 27 Michas-Swingertreff Swingerclub Harz-Heide Gewerbestr. 10a Osterfeld 3 Impressum 31275 Lehrte 38159 Vechelde www.nordharz.net/michas_swingertreff/mod/cms/ www.swingerclub-harz-heide.net/ Editors: Christoph, Frank, Mara ([email protected]) “The bisexuals that come to our club do live out their One of the parties at Michas Swingertreff is the bra- tendencies and it hasn’t bothered anyone so far. We Layout: Martin ([email protected]) celet party, where yellow indicates an interest in wo- have a lot of non-smoking areas,“ but smoking isn’t men, men, and couples, and the bi party (current entirely prohibited (current entrance fees: men 60– English translation: Aki entrance fees: men 70 €, women 15 €, couples 80 €, women 15 €, couples 35–45 €) 45 €). The second party says: “A little bi won’t hurt Contributors: Christian, Fabian, Jens, John, Lisa, Ralf, Roland, Shiri, Stefan, Thomas, Walter, Wolli ... for all women and men who want to act on their bi tendencies with like-minded people. Of course trans* Weißes Haus Circulation: 1000 pcs + online version (www.bine.net/bijou) are welcome as well”. Häuerstr. 13 39418 Staßfurt ISSN: BiJou (Frankfurt. Internet) ISSN 2196-3150 www.weisseshausstassfurt.de BiJou (Frankfurt. German ed. print) ISSN 2196-3169 BiJou (Frankfurt. English. ed. Print) ISSN 2196-3177 Every Thursday at 4pm is “Men’s night“ (current ent- rance fees: men 39 €) for bi- und homosexual men. Printer: www.printerwahnsinn.com

ViSdP: BiNe – Bisexuelles Netzwerk e. V. c/o Hartmut Friedrichs Eschweger Straße 16 Der Bisexuelle Regenschirm D-60389 Frankfurt am Main

BiJou representative of the board: David

Image rights: Image rights remain with the copyright holders. Should image rights have been vio- lated despite our intensive research, it was not deliberate and the copyright owner is requested to contact the editorial team.

Special image rights: The film Kaboom is available for purchase on DVD and Blu-ray at Wild Bunch Germa- ny/Universum.

Note: We assume no responsibility for the content of all links. The site ow- ners are solely responsible for the content of these pages. The mentioning of a person (even as an author) is no indication of their sexual identity, orientation, or behaviour.

Bi group in Tübingen now meets on Fridays: TüBisch-Gruppe – every 2nd Friday of the month at 8pm at the Saints & Scholars Irish Pub, Wilhelmstr. 44, 72074 Tübingen, Contact: bi-treffen- [email protected] (Schedule changes are announced via email.) 30 31 Infos

The Bisexual Network (BiNe e.V.) has been around since 1992 and, as the name already says, aims to network bisexuals with one ano- ther (through group listings, their website www.bine.net, nation wide bi meetings, etc.). It stands for awareness and tolerance, conducts coun- seling, supports bi activities (e.g. at CSDs) and makes the existence of this magazine possible.

Become a member and support BiNe e.V.: www.bine.net/mitglied

Logo of BiNe e.V. Meetings 2013/2014/2015: 31.1.–3.2. 2013 Bi men’s meeting Waldschlösschen Göttingen 8.–10.3. 2013 Concept seminar Syke 26.–28.4. 2013 Bi seminar (commercial) z-bi Berlin 9.–12.5. 2013 Open bi meeting Butzbach 18.–21.7. 2013 Bi-Con Edinburgh, Scotland 8.–11.8. 2013 Bi women’s meeting Altenbücken 14.–15.9. 2013 Bi Berlin camp Berlin 23.9. 2013 Bisexuality day worldwide ??.??. 2013 Low budget treffen Fredelsloh 3.-6.10. 2013 Open bi meeting Meschede

6.–9.2. 2014 Bi men’s meeting Waldschlösschen Göttingen 29.5.–1.6. 2014 Open bi meeting Belzig 23.9. 2014 Bisexuality day worldwide 2.–5.10. 2014 Open bi meeting Butzbach

14.–17.5. 2015 Open bi meeting Meschede

More info at http://www.bine.net/treffs/?lang=de (not available in English). Registration for the bi women’s meeting: [email protected]

Regional groups can be found at http://www.bine.net/gruppen/?text=bigruppen (not available in English).

You can have a look at our book list at www.bine.net/literatur/bineliteratur.pdf and the movie list at http://www.bine.net/literatur/ (page not available in English, but Eng- lish series and films are listed) International Bi flag There is an online version of the Bisexual Journal on our website: www.bine.net/bijou.

For Germany only: If you need help, call the bi counseling hotline: Tel.: 0 700 – B I B E R A T U N G (24 23 72 88 64) Costs in Germany depends on mobile provider (landline approximately 12.3ct/min)