Part I – David's Life This part of the book contains a chronological account of David's life. It also includes, in appropriate places, much of David's written work, such as: compositions, essays, book plans, presentations, and the like, and some pictures of his art, notably, the windows. However, because of the sheer volume of what he left and I chose to record, I have decided to include much of his art work in a separate section, at the end, called Part II. Growing Up This section covers David's life through high school graduation.

Newark, New Jersey at St. Michael's ,(ד' טבת התשכ"ד David was born on December 19, 1963 (corresponding to hospital, in Newark, New Jersey. He weighed 8 pounds and 6 ounces at birth, and was 22 inches long. For the record, it also became clear later that he was left handed. The Sandek at his Brit was Rabbi David Lifshitz, who had been Saba Wolicki's teacher in Yeshiva University. His godmother was his grandmother (my mother) Pearl (Peshe Rachel Etshokin DuBow) Dwork. David was named after my father, David Daniel DuBow. The mohel was Rabbi Mordecai Zimmerman. David was a hungry baby, who ate eagerly and slept a lot. He found and started sucking his thumb by the time he was three weeks old. Maybe that was the reason that he did not cry a lot. When he first stirred, he sucked his thumb and only started to cry when he was really hungry. Then, he had to be fed right away. After eating, he also sucked his thumb. This helped him settle down and go to sleep easily. In any case, I remember him as a very easy and predictable baby. It was a good thing, because I was a very inexperienced mother, having had little exposure to babies before my own. When David was born, we lived in a two bedroom apartment at 240 Mt. Vernon Place, in the Ivy Hill apartment complex, on the outer city limits of Newark, New Jersey, and across the street from a lovely park. 1964, Three Months I went for long walks with David almost every day, for a number of reasons. I liked to walk, David liked the walks, and it enabled me to run errands. As a baby, David smiled readily at everyone. As a result of his enchanting a group of elderly ladies in the park, they got together and bought him a highchair. Another gift that David received when he was born was a multi-colored, zigzag crocheted afghan blanket. A lady named Mrs. Clumpus made it for him. He kept that blanket on the end of his bed for years. Around the time of his death, it was still used as a throw in his living room. I repaired it a few times. The last repair was a new white crocheted edge. David stood up quite early. He first learned to stand up by himself in the crib when he was about six months old. For a short time, he would stand up and then cry because he couldn't figure out how to sit down. But, he soon solved that problem. At that time, we had no carpet, but we did have a lightweight coffee table that was just the Growing Up, Wallingford, Connecticut right height for David. He would stand up at one end of it and start taking steps. As a result, one end of the coffee table would start to slide on the floor. However, since the other end did not move, David would end up going around in circles, much like oxen did centuries ago at grinding wheels.

Wallingford, Connecticut In July, when David was seven months old, we moved to 93 Constitution Street in Wallingford, Connecticut. David was already standing up by himself by this time. By ten months, he was walking without holding onto anything. This was good for me, because I was already expecting his brother Zvi in March. We continued to take frequent walks. We lived in a three bedroom, split-level house that was surrounded by lots of very tall trees. There was no sidewalk in front of the house. There was a steep hill from the front of the house down to the street. In back of the house, the land extended uphill. A small piece was grass and the rest was untouched forest. It was in this house that David first encountered stairs. One day, on the way into the house, when he was just learning to talk, he proudly announced, "I gupping the stairs". Just outside David's bedroom window there was a large bush in which some robins chose to build a nest. We were able to see the sky blue eggs and watch the young birds hatch, eat, grow and fly away. David loved to watch them. This love of nature continued all his life. David was very aware of the world around him and loved to observe the sky, trees, animals and everything in nature. 1964, Nine Months In the fall, we had huge piles of brightly colored leaves. David loved to play in the leaves while I raked them into piles. We purchased a swing-set for the backyard and David (and later Zvi) often played on it. A friend offered us a small gray kitten. It was very cute, so we accepted it. We called it Smokey. However, as the kitten grew, it needed places to sharpen its claws. Also, it learned that there were many small animals living in the trees that surrounded our house. By the time Zvi was born (when David was almost 15 months old), we had to give the (by now) cat to a local farm. Smokey stayed out all night and caught his own food anyway. We were afraid the cat would bring home fleas and give them to Zvi in his playpen. One morning (before Zvi was born), David was following me around my bedroom and fell. He hit himself on the footboard of my bed and needed stitches just above his eye. It was very frightening for me, but it turned out to be not very serious, although it could have been. I also remember David having a bad bout of croup, which wasn't really serious either. However, as I said earlier, I was an inexperienced mother and his loud barking coughs and high temperature made a strong impression on me. Other than these incidents, I remember David as a sturdy, healthy child, who was always on the upper end of the size charts and ate well. He especially loved yoghurt. His favorite flavors were strawberry, prune and coffee. Growing Up, Mt. Clemens, Michigan

Zvi was born when David was 14 and a half months old. David was a calm baby, who woke up at six in the morning, took regular long naps and was asleep for the night by six in the evening (with the help of his thumb and his favorite yellow thermal blanket). Since Zvi's addition to the family did not upset his routine very much, he did not show any noticeable reaction to his new brother. David, Zvi and I spent a lot of time out of doors. When we moved to Connecticut, we purchased our own washing machine. However, since we did not yet have a dryer, I hung the clothes outside on lines most of the time. While I hung and took in the clothes, David and Zvi played outside with me. We also continued our long walks (we would be out for an hour or two), with Zvi in the carriage and David sitting on a seat resting across it or walking. 1965, One Year and a Half We would go into the center of town (a 15 minute walk away) to the library, shopping or just enjoying the weather. At that time, David and Zvi were both very nervous around dogs. The family across the street from us had some very large, noisy, and aggressive dogs. However, another family not too far from us had two young playful dogs that were also noisy, but friendly. These dogs were kept tied in front of their house on chains. So we spent several afternoons sitting just out of range of those dogs, just watching them jump and play. Eventually, the boys got used to them and recognized that their barking and jumping was just playfulness. From that time on, neither was afraid of dogs anymore.

Mt. Clemens, Michigan In May of 1966, when David was just under two and a half years old, David's second brother, Eliav was born. Then, in July of that same year we moved again, this time to Mt. Clemens, Michigan. We moved into a three bedroom home that had been built before indoor plumbing. We had big flat lawns in the front and back of the house, several huge lilac bushes, very tall walnut trees in the back, plum trees, a climbable apple tree, and dirt that provided many hours of fun for the boys, especially after a rain. While the boys played outside in the dirt with their trucks, I began working on an old round wood table that we found in the garage. When I first discovered it, it had the remains of several coats of peeling paint, but it was very sturdy. I started removing the paint and later, sanded, stained and refinished the table. We used it for years and later gave it to Zvi. He used it for a few years and passed it on to David. The table held his fish tank in his home in Ginot Shomron for many years. As I write this, it is still in use, now in Benjie's living room. I suspect this and my many other do-it-yourself projects may have been partly responsible for the interest in this kind of thing on the part of my sons, especially David. Also, the fact that we took so many walks and were surrounded by so many magnificent trees and much nature may have heightened David's awareness and interest in his natural environment. By this time, when I walked with the three boys, David was on foot. It didn't seem to faze Growing Up, Mt. Clemens, Michigan

him. He was always a good walker and we all enjoyed it as we explored our neighborhood and ran errands. While we lived in Michigan, when David was four years old, his third brother, Benjie was born. In Michigan I started taking the boys to shul. I arranged for a non-Jewish baby sitter to come to the house for a few hours on Shabbat morning. Then I would walk with David (usually) to shul, just in time for the closing communal singing. One Simchat Torah, when David was four and a half years old, we went to shul. There was a table set up in the shul for the men to make Kiddush after getting an Aliyah. David approached the table and helped himself to what he thought was apple juice. He liked apple juice very much so he drank it right down. It turned out to be whiskey. David never learned to like whiskey, or any alcoholic beverages for that matter, including dry wine. He did use sweet wine for Kiddush on Shabbat and Chagim. 1966, Two and a Half Years In Mt. Clemens, David attended story hour at the local library every week and a morning nursery program. He also liked watching TV. As a young child, his favorites were Mr. Rogers, the Friendly Giant and Sesame Street. He always watched very intently, almost hypnotized. He would become extremely annoyed if others made noise or distracted him. This "TV watching style" was uniquely his and notably different from the TV watching style of some of his brothers. It lasted all his life. Around this time, I noticed that David only sucked his thumb when he was very tired. So, I suggested to him that if he continued to suck his thumb, it would make his teeth grow crooked. From that time, he stopped. I was amazed. It is usually very hard to get a child who sucks his thumb to stop. My guess is that he must have been almost ready to stop anyway. However, it is also possible that he simply took what I said very seriously. It is only with hindsight and later knowledge of David as an adult that I became aware of just how deeply he pondered and thought about things, especially himself. Although he didn't express his thoughts and feelings very much as a child, I know that the adult David was extremely critical of himself, aware of the gaps between reality and what he thought he should be, and always conscious of his position as the oldest child. This focus on himself and on the wish for the ideal (in this case, to do the right thing) may have been partly responsible for his stopping his thumb-sucking so readily. David loved all kinds of music. I frequently played a wide variety of music on our phonograph – Jewish and secular children's and popular songs, classical Jewish and Hassidic music, light classical, country, and other. Years later, in Israel, when the phonograph was becoming obsolete, David undertook the job of transferring all of our favorite records onto tapes. After completing the task, he told me how much he enjoyed doing it because it brought back to him music that he remembered from his childhood. In our last year in Mt. Clemens, when he was four and a half, David started attending kindergarten every morning in Detroit. Saba drove him there every day. A Mother's Day present that he made the following May (age five and a half) records his height as 44 and a Growing Up, Cleveland, Ohio half inches tall (1.13 meters) and his weight as 50 pounds (22.5 kilograms). It also shows full hand prints and includes the following poem (written by the teacher): You clean my prints from wall to door for I'm not careful when I play. But here's a pair you'll want to keep. They're made for you this Mother's Day. Love, David W.

Right hand actual size: • Tip of thumb to tip of pinky,14.3 cm (5 5/8") • Tip of pointer to outside corner of palm, 12.7 cm (5") Left hand actual size: • Tip of thumb to tip of pinky 14.6 cm (5.75") • Tip of middle finger to base of palm 12.7 cm (5")

Cleveland, Ohio In 1969, when David was five and a half years old, we moved to 3662 Bendemeer Road in Cleveland Heights, Ohio. The move to Cleveland brought a number of changes in David's life that were probably significant for him. The first was the death of his paternal grandfather (and the subsequent frequent visits of Grandma Wolicki). The second was the fact that he started first grade at a school to which he walked by himself. In addition, we were now living in a religious Jewish neighborhood, which meant that David and his brothers now had Jewish children as playmates. Finally, in February of 1970, David's brother Pesach was born. When Pesach was born, and for a short while after, Grandma Wolicki (Saba's mother) came to help. This was the first of many extended visits she spent with us. She was a very special person and I believe she had a strong impact on David and his brothers. (David named his first daughter Miriam after her.) Later, David always got along very well with people at least a generation older than he was - the older the better. I think it was a combination of the facts Growing Up, Cleveland, Ohio that older people tend to be more honest, and they make fewer demands, that made him so comfortable with them. (See also "My Grandmother" on page 28 and "On Who He Is" on page 47.) Ours was a lively household, but disciplined. Everyone was wide awake by six a.m., ate breakfast by 6:10, and went to bed at fixed times. David, Zvi, and Eliav slept in the same room (David and Zvi in a bunk bed), and went to bed at almost the same time. I would read stories every night before bedtime. When they were in bed, I would say Shma with them. Often, I would sit on the floor outside their room until they quieted down and fell asleep. Sometimes, I would sing songs to them while they were falling asleep. David started wearing glasses in 1971 when he was seven. I don't remember it being an issue with him. After all, all the adults around him wore them. One summer, David went to a day camp. One day, while playing on a slide at this day camp, David fell and landed on his head. We were very frightened and David was hospitalized over night. The diagnosis was that he had had a hairline fracture in his skull and no other noticeable ill effects. However, we were cautioned to keep our eyes open for other possible problems, such as seizures. In retrospect, that event may have had some relevance to the headaches he suffered later and, subsequently, to the hemorrhage that caused 1971, Seven Years Old his death. It was in Cleveland that the older boys started taking breakfast for themselves. In the summer, they also often took lunch for themselves. At the beginning they often left a mess, so I didn't watch. But, they took the first step toward self-reliance by learning to make simple meals for themselves. In later years, David thanked me for teaching him his way around in the kitchen. David got his first bicycle in Cleveland. He would play on the street with all the other kids. Some had bikes and knew how to ride and some didn't. At first David couldn't seem to get the hang of it. In fact, his brother Eliav was the first of the boys to learn to ride without training wheels. Zvi learned the same summer, soon after Eliav. Then, one day all the kids were playing and David, as usual, was on his bike, pushing himself along with his feet on the ground. At some point, in his eagerness to keep up with the others, he must have picked up his feet and started pedaling. He ran into the house very excited yelling, "I can ride, I can ride." He hadn't been trying at that point in time, but learned almost by accident. Throughout David's childhood, David was tall for his age. Because he was bright, he was deemed ready to start school the September before he turned five. However, even allowing for the fact that he started school early (his birthday was in December), he was usually the tallest in his class. Consequently, teachers in school and others outside of school all expected him to behave as though he were older. To this day, I believe that this had an impact on his self-image. He agonized for years about not meeting the expectations of first his parents, then his teachers, and finally of himself. Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec

We stayed in Cleveland while David was in first, second, and third grades. As a student, David was unpredictable. Sometimes he was very good, and sometimes he just tuned out. He was not a troublemaker, but he didn't always do what he was asked to do. I sat with him often while he did his homework. Neither of us enjoyed the experience.

1972, Eight Years Old

Montreal, Quebec In September of 1972, we moved to 2515 Badeaux Street in Ville St. Laurent, Montreal, Canada. David was eight years old. In Montreal, David had some major adjustments to make. The boys now went to school by car. We did not live in a neighborhood that was walking distance from the school and all of their friends from school lived far away. As a result, they spent most of their time playing with one another. This was mostly on Shabbat afternoon because during the week, the boys spent long hours in school and there was very little time for playing after they got home. In the early years in Montreal, we allowed some television watching in the evening. I would provide critical comment, a practice not appreciated by my sons at that time. David was one of those most annoyed by my interruption of his concentration. I was particularly annoyed by the foolish behavior of adults and smart-alecky children in what was classified as "sitcoms" and therefore, suitable for the young. To this day, I believe that my comments played a part in developing the ability in my sons to not accept blindly Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec

what they see, but instead to think independently and draw their own conclusions. This ability to think critically and independently sometimes got them (especially David) into trouble, but more often (I believe), proved valuable.

School

Another change in the school situation was that in Montreal, French was a serious part of the school curriculum. Most of David's classmates had already had some exposure to the language, both in school and from the environment. Although David learned enough French to meet the government requirements, he never overcame his initial disadvantage. In addition, it was in Montreal that one of his teachers noticed that although David could see what was on the blackboard, he had trouble with work at his desk, especially keeping his finger on the place in texts. It turned out that, although he had glasses that enabled him to see distance, he was having trouble with his vision for things that were close. In other words, he needed bifocals. Getting the right glasses helped his vision problem. Unfortunately, it was harder to correct the cumulative effect of not pleasing the teacher and not knowing what was going on for an unknown period of time. 1972, Eight Years Old David remained an erratic (sometimes excelling and sometimes failing) student, with a tendency to daydream until he was out of formal schooling. He did well in subjects he liked, but refused to apply himself when faced with a challenge. He was strong in English Composition and Sciences, but weak in Math and French. He got top grades in Biology, but failed Canadian History (he said the book was boring and never read it) and Math. The result was that he, and his brother Zvi graduated high school in the same year, 1981. (In Quebec, graduation from high school is after 11th grade.) When he was finally able to decide for himself what, how, and when he would learn, he did it intensely and thoroughly, retaining whatever he learned and taking every opportunity to share with others what he learned.

Summers The first few summers we were living in Montreal, we took family vacations. We would all pile into our station wagon and drive first to Chicago where the Dwork grandparents lived. Then we would drive to Rockaway in New York where Grandma Wolicki lived. In Chicago we visited the zoo, museums, family, and restaurants (a treat that we seldom enjoyed in Montreal). On the way to New York we would make stops, stay in motels, and do some sightseeing. In New York, we played in the Atlantic Ocean (Grandma Wolicki's house was a short block from the beach), visited friends (the Wieders, mostly), and shopped. One summer we went to the White Mountains of New Hampshire where we hiked, toured, and stayed in motels. Another summer, we rented a summer house at Trout Lake in the Laurentian Mountains in Quebec. At Trout Lake there were many other children from Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec religious families for the boys to swim and play with. Two summers David went to sleep- away camp for a month.

Bar Mitzvah In the summer of 1975, when David was 11 and a half years old, he went with his father on a trip to Israel for three weeks. We wanted to introduce him to Israel in the hopes that some day we and he would make Aliyah. We also wanted him to have some time alone with his father, who was often too busy to spend quality time with his sons. They also purchased his Tephilin at that time. At that time, we had no way of knowing what impression the trip made on David. Hindsight suggests we succeeded. As a Bar Mitzvah boy, David was average. He learned what he had to learn, did it well and suffered afterwards writing "Thank You" cards. When David was 13, he changed schools from an all-boys, non-Zionistic environment to a co-ed Zionistic one. He had seemed to be tuning out in his religious studies in the more intense and rigid school he had been attending. We hoped that he would find a way to express himself in a more open environment. Eventually, David did find his way. I am not sure if what we did had any impact one way or the other. However, it probably did influence the choices he made in the next few years. 1976, Bar Mitzvah

Music David was very talented musically. At one point we bought a piano and arranged for David to take piano lessons. After a few years of friction over practicing, we gave up and exchanged the piano for a china cabinet. A number of years later, David was playing the piano on the stage in one of the halls in our shul in Montreal, behind a closed curtain. We were told by the man who maintained the building that David frequently came there to play the piano. He played from his head, without music. As with many other talents he had, he was most successful when he did it his way, privately, and without anyone directing him. David also had a good baritone voice. Our family always sang many zemirot at the Shabbat table. As the years passed, David would improvise harmonies. I, personally, loved to hear him sing. Initially, he did not show the personality of a performer, that is, someone who is eager to show off what he could do. However, when encouraged, he enjoyed it and threw himself into it. He learned the words to many Broadway shows and loved to sing them at the top of his lungs in the shower. He also liked the songs of Harry Belafonte and especially the song "16 Tons", all of which were appropriate for his deep rich voice. Our shul (Beth Ora) always had a world-class, professional, full time Chazan and a men's choir with a professional choir leader. On Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, the Chagim and on special occasions, they would sing to enhance the service. Saba Wolicki introduced a Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec practice in our shul (Beth Ora) of having a communal Seudah Shelishit at which they sang zemirot. The leader of the choir used to attend. One Shabbat, when David was improvising harmonies, both the Chazan and the choir leader heard him. They were so impressed, that they invited him to join the choir. He sang in the choir for a few years and learned an appreciation for chazanut in the process. Later, men in many minyanim in which he participated learned of his pleasant voice and he was frequently asked to be the Shaliach Tzibur. Before accepting, he always warned them that he didn't like to daven fast. If they could accept his pace, he went to the Amud. Even then, his style was to immerse himself in what he was doing, and not to show off. He was concerned with enhancing the prayers for others, and keeping them with him. He knew and kept to the Nusach. However, whenever he permitted himself to open up a little, it was always impressive and appreciated.

Art David was constantly drawing cartoons and illustrating his notes in school. He even got in trouble once when, in answer to a question on a test, he drew an illustration. It was marked wrong. Later he brought the paper home and showed it to us. The illustration answered the question fully. Saba took the paper to the principal of the school who agreed that David had answered the question completely and correctly. Unfortunately, the teacher was very rigid and did not know how to relate to David's innovative way of expressing himself. David also drew caricatures. At first, he just practiced different characters that he made up. A few were so charming (to me) that I kept them. He drew his teachers, his classmates, people on public transportation, anyone in his vicinity. David spent a lot of time experimenting with different media. In addition to pencil and pen, he practiced with water colors, charcoal and pastels. One day, when I was helping him clean his room for Pesach, I noticed a small watercolor of trees on the floor. I liked it and asked if I could have it. He shrugged and said okay. I framed it and still have it hanging on my wall. Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec

1979, Trees, Watercolor Rescued from Floor of David's Room Original size: 10 x 14 cm (4" x 5.5") All of these attempts were without guidance and completely on his own. Also, he rarely showed the results to anyone. I gave him a few art books that I had used in my art classes when I was growing up. He used them to practice drawing parts of the body in various positions and perspectives. At any point in time you could find papers around full of noses, ears, knees, feet and hands. We had a professional painter/artist in the community who taught art classes and with whom we were very friendly. In addition, she had a son David's age with whom David was moderately friendly. We arranged for David to go to her for lessons. It didn't work. Later, David developed his artistic skills, one at a time, learning different media and techniques in his own time and his own way (usually from books), and producing material as the spirit moved him.

Drama I have a picture of David dressed as a lady for a French play when he was about eight or nine years old. Later, in high school, he played the king in a Purim play. He always liked to clown and enjoyed dressing up for Purim. In costume, he always acted the part to the fullest. His dramatic skills became more evident when he was in Yeshiva University, in New York. At that time he made a very strong impression on many people when, as a member of the Drama Society, he won a number of awards for his dramatic abilities. Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec

Pets We started with goldfish in a bowl, when David was quite young. That was not a successful experiment. Probably because I was not particularly interested and did not bother finding out what it took to keep them alive. When David was 10 years old, he had to have teeth pulled. His teeth were very crowded and some were pulled for orthodontia. As compensation, David got a parakeet that he called Simcha. Unfortunately, Simcha was the most unhappy and neurotic parakeet I have ever seen. I had had a parakeet when I was a young girl that I had trained to take baths in my hand. So, I thought I knew something about parakeets and could help David train this bird. Nothing worked. David had no pleasure from Simcha. When Simcha died, everyone was relieved. One summer, when David was in his early teens, some very good friends of ours who lived in the community and owned a black Labrador retriever went on vacation. They asked David to "dog sit". Since their dog was very intelligent and well-behaved we agreed. David took the dog for walks and enjoyed its company very much. When David was a little older, he bought a fish tank. He started with a small one and worked his way up to the biggest tank he could fit into his room. He even had to get a special table that was strong enough and big enough to hold it. It was approximately four feet (1.22 m) long, a foot and a half (46 cm) wide and two feet (61 cm) high. In a pattern that proved to be the same for many of his interests, David acquired books about the equipment and contents of aquaria, and made himself an expert on the subject. He did not share this information unless someone happened to show an interest in the subject. When this would happen, it opened the floodgates as David eagerly shared what he knew until the listener's eyes would glaze over. There were few who could match him in his enthusiasm for detail and thoroughness about the subjects that took his fancy. What is interesting is that David understood that many others did not match him in their desire to know everything about everything. As an adult, he learned to recognize when his audience had reached the saturation point and could no longer absorb any more information. He even developed a sense of humor about it so that when I talked to him on the phone, and I had reached my limit on a particular subject, I could call "Time" and he would good- naturedly change the subject. See also, "Why Someone Should Have a Pet (Especially Fish)" on page 23.

Miniatures David was fascinated by miniatures. A number of his school projects involved making miniature buildings or scenes. He also collected miniatures of all sorts and materials, e.g., blown glass figures, small animals from brass, wood, onyx, and other materials. He even kept plastic and china figures that came in cereal boxes. Some of these had been mine. I, too, found them interesting. However, as with everything else, he took it further than I ever had. Later, when he had his own home, he made a special cabinet for his collection. Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec

David's Miniatures in the Display Cabinet He Made

Gardening We had a big backyard in Montreal. David's first attempts at gardening on his own were not very successful, but not for lack of trying. He tried planting strawberries but was frustrated by the short growing season in Montreal and the poor soil in our backyard. Given a choice, David preferred chores that kept him physically active and outside. He would eagerly cut or water the grass, shovel snow or help plant flowers in the spring. It was a little harder to get him to participate in indoor chores. David and his brothers made friends with a number of adult members of the community. David learned a lot about gardening from books (as was his style) and from discussions with some of these adults. One of his dreams for when he was an adult was to have a yard which he could plan and plant as he chose. Although he lived to have his own yard, his dreams had by that time expanded so that he never had enough time and space for what he wanted to do.

Reading David always read voraciously. Initially, I read bedtime stories to him and his brothers. Later he read to his brothers. Libraries in Montreal were free and we (the family) visited regularly to take out the maximum number of books. When he started to handle some of his own Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec

money, he would purchase his own books, mostly nonfiction. It was at this stage that he purchased "The World of Disney" (a kind of encyclopedia for children), one book each month. The amazing thing is that he actually read every book, cover to cover and retained what he read. David's interests covered a wide range of subjects. In addition to fiction, he read books on art and drawing, gardening, fish, carpentry, history, philosophy and many other subjects.

Sports Montreal had free city swimming pools. One summer I decided the boys needed to learn how to swim. I started with David, Zvi and Eliav and took them to a pool every day until they were comfortable in the water. David was the first to learn how to swim. From that time on, David swam whenever he had the opportunity. David also loved to walk. As a teenager, he would go for long walks very late at night, by himself. I suspect he enjoyed the opportunity to think as well the physical exercise. He also found it hard to part with clothing that he felt still had some wear left in it. On one of his walks he was stopped by the police. He looked scruffy, it was the wee hours of the morning and he had no identification on him. It didn't stop him from walking or wearing the clothes. Partly because of his growth pattern, as a small boy, David was not well coordinated. During his biggest growth spurt in adolescence, he suffered through a very clumsy period when he seemed to often stumble over his own feet. The doctor said that it was caused by the various parts of the joints (especially the knees) not growing at the same pace. What is interesting, is the impact that this might have had on his personality. As a young boy, he was not particularly good at sports that involved running and throwing, or catching a ball. As a result, in the early years, he was not in demand as a team player, although later, David did make the basketball team in high school, where his height was an advantage. Possibly because he knew how it felt to be on the fringes, he often reached out to those who had a different style from the norm.

Temperament David was impatient with injustice, falseness, and mediocrity. He had a low tolerance level for people who were not experts in their field, but pretended to be (including some teachers he had). He had only kindness and patience for the elderly and people who were truly disadvantaged. He focused on essentials, and had no patience for empty words. He hated waste, and kept everything in the expectation that he would use it some day. When he wasn't really sorry, he couldn't apologize. When events upset him, he lashed out at anyone around in anger. As a teenager, he was incapable of speaking diplomatically (in his opinion, deviously or falsely). Later, as an adult, he found it extremely difficult to keep silent when he disagreed, even when it would have been to his advantage (for example, at work). But, he was really a softy. He cared deeply and was alert and sensitive to the feelings of others, though he often didn't know how to show it. He was a man of action, not (spoken) words. He often befriended others that he sensed needed befriending, for whatever reason. He felt the weight of responsibility especially in two areas: developing his own potential and, as the eldest, concern for his brothers (in spite of the fact that they neither wanted nor needed it). David, in his teen years, had no clear direction of where he wanted to go in his life. He knew he was smart and had many talents, but had trouble deciding what path to take. He worried about finding his way and being able to support a family. Although many of his talents were in artistic directions, he was afraid of the economic instability of those options. Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec

David was stubborn. On one occasion this was beneficial. He decided that he wanted to learn to touch-type. I gave him a book from which a person could teach himself to type. He completed it. This skill served to be very useful to him throughout his life whenever he felt like dumping his thoughts onto paper, for assignments in school and later, when he worked as a technical writer. David was very careful with his money. Once, when he received some money for his birthday, we went to a store so he could buy something. He walked around for some time before he came and said he couldn't decide what to get. I told him that he didn't have to spend it if he couldn't find anything that he wanted more than the money. We went home, his money intact. It was only as an adult, near the end, when he began to feel a greater sense of economic security, that he began to indulge himself and spend a little more freely on his hobbies and interests. (He never stopped wearing the most outrageous old clothes when he worked around the house, although he did finally upgrade those he wore to work.)

Humor David had a marvelous, wry sense of humor. His best jokes were clever and original, usually word plays and corny puns, delivered deadpan. We would be sitting around the table talking (mostly on Shabbat or Chag) and he would insert a line that would break us all up. His letters were witty and entertaining, filled with illustrations of whatever he was expressing in words. He rarely guffawed. When amused, he showed a slightly crooked smile and a twinkle in his eye. He had a beautiful smile and it used to annoy me that he always kept his mouth closed (teeth hidden) when he smiled, especially for pictures. They say that body language is a strong indicator of a person's feelings. I believe that this closed-mouth smile was a reflection of his trying to keep his inner thoughts to himself.

On Being a Rabbi's Son It is impossible for me to know how much being the oldest son of a Rabbi who served in different communities affected David, and his brothers too, for that matter. However, there is no question that it did. I know that David often spoke of the difficulty of having to change communities and friends. It doesn't matter that other people moved more. What was important, was that David didn't like it. In addition, our community in Montreal numbered close to one thousand families. Although the shul was a fully Orthodox one, most of the members of the congregation were not Sabbath observant. Consequently, although David and his brothers went to schools with fully observant classmates, they lived among people who were not. Because Saba was the Rabbi of the congregation, he had a fixed seat up front, on the Bima. When we came to Montreal, the atmosphere in shul was still very formal, closer to the old British style than the American. The boys couldn't sit with their father, although on Friday night they sat with him, not on the Bima. All of the boys learned to fend for themselves. They each made friends with different men in the community, according to their personalities. We tried to teach them that they had to behave properly because they were religious Jews and Bnei Torah. They had a responsibility to behave so that people would praise the lifestyle we represented and cause a Kiddush Hashem. Of course, though we personally never said it, they probably thought it was because they were "the Rabbi's kids". Although it was probably difficult for them at the time, they didn't verbalize it and I didn't notice it. Growing Up, Montreal, Quebec

However, I believe that the fact that all of my sons as adults handle themselves well with strangers and with people of all backgrounds is one of the results of the environment in which they lived as children and teenagers. Growing Up, Childhood Ends

Childhood Ends In June of 1981, when David graduated high school, the whole family went to Israel for a year. We had been talking about wanting to make Aliyah for many years. In preparation, we arranged to go to Israel on Sabbatical. We exchanged homes with a family we knew who lived in Bayit Vegan, in Jerusalem. In addition to packing for the trip, the boys also had to pack away anything that they didn't want the other family to use. During this year, we hoped to upgrade our memories of Israel and to explore the possibilities for our own Aliyah. In addition, we hoped that each of the boys would get to know Israel and come to some conclusion about whether or not he personally wanted to make Aliyah. Both David and Zvi were going to programs that took them out of the house. Eliav was going to be in a dorm during the week, and come home for Shabbat. The other boys would attend schools in Jerusalem, and live at home. This marked the end of an era and a dramatic transition for the whole family.

1981, Seventeen Growing Up, In the Words of a Friend

In the Words of a Friend Submitted by Irwin Yellin (and slightly edited by me, David's mother) I first met David in 1972, when he and his family moved to Montreal. I was 10 years old, and David, the son of the new Rabbi was almost 9. I was in a particularly fragile state at that time, having lost my father a few months previously. David was the “new kid” in the area, looking for new friends. Of course, being the Rabbi’s son carried a certain amount of stigma associated with it, and many others did not really want to be his friend. I, on the other hand, had been friends with the previous Rabbi’s son, and had no problem associating with David. One drawback to our friendship was that we did not go to the same school. I did make several attempts to switch to his school, although for certain technical reasons, it was not possible. His school was more religious, mine was more labour-zionist. Our friendship lasted for many years, and through a lot of trials and obstacles. While we were in grade school, and most of high school, we belonged to the same youth group, and went to the same (occasional) Shabbat groups. One part of our friendship was made possible by the fact that I did not spend time trying to bother him. We would sit together in shul, and spend a lot of time talking, (to the consternation of the gabbais, and I assume, David’s father).

On David's Intensity I do remember that whenever he was discussing something, he became focused on the topic and the person he was talking to. There was seemingly no outside interference, no distractions. As I look back and think about it, I realize that many adults do not have this skill – to filter out all distractions. I recall one incident, when he was telling a few of us how he cleaned out his fish tank. It was not an interesting topic and the other fellows just walked away. David continued, describing in detail exactly the procedures he used. I still remember listening to every word, enthralled by the detailed, exact description. He made it sound interesting. It is no wonder he chose technical writing as a profession. He once told me that he wanted to be a cabinet maker or a carpenter. I think he was 15 or 16 at the time. I remember he told me that he wanted to have a job where he could be creative all of the time. After seeing his home in Israel, I saw the full extent of his skills, when his brothers pointed out all the work that he had put into the house. I was also impressed with the array of professional tools and equipment he possessed for working with wood. It dawned on me that based on his total focus on whatever he was doing, I should not have been surprised. His focus would have directed him to find the best tools available. We were both members of NCSY. We participated in dozens of events together. Sadly, due to the passage of time, most of them have blended together. There are some incidents that do stand out in my mind: We had both worked at a Purim carnival in the shul on a particular Sunday. Both of us had been there from about 9:00 in the morning, setting up. David and I were each in charge of at least two or three booths. By 5:00 p.m., we were both exhausted. Someone asked us if we were interested in going to Cornwall, Ontario (about an hour’s drive from Montreal) to help with an outreach program. We both went, and I remember both of us breaking the ice with the Cornwallers by grabbing people and starting to dance. David was like a dynamo; despite the fact that he was exhausted, he did not take a break. He seemed to gain energy with every passing second. I remember we were once at a Shabbaton. If I remember correctly, I was 15, and David was 14. It was a warm Shabbat afternoon, after a good lunch. We were sitting in a discussion Growing Up, In the Words of a Friend

group, and David was arguing some point. I do not remember what we were all discussing, but I remember everyone listening to him rebut point after point, declaring most of them irrelevant to the discussion. Even the advisor was not willing to intervene. On another occasion, on Shavuos, we were chatting at about 2:30 am. He looked kind of worried, so I asked him what was wrong. He told me that he had a Chumash question. "When Moshe went to get the Torah, he learned something from every angel. So what did he learn from the Angel of Death?" We both started looking up sources, points and ideas. After about an hour and a half, I came up with an answer. He listened to what I had to say, smiled and said, “That’s a good answer. I wanted to see if you could find one.” Teens were regularly invited to attend Ongei Shabbat at the Rabbi’s (David's also) house. They were a lot of fun, being casual, informal affairs. We spent the time listening to stories, singing, eating and playing games. At one of these, one of the games that David pulled out had a lot of marbles. The game itself was not very interesting, but David and I began playing marbles on the living room carpet. We set up a small tournament, although David spent a lot of time making new rules and redefining the game.

On the Light Side One thing we did was play harmless practical jokes on each other. I remember one time, at a Shabbaton dinner. We were sitting next to each other. I was leading him on with an idea that we should be more personal with the food we were about to eat. In order to become more personal, I named my food. I carefully waited until he had a mouthful of food and said "This is my chicken. His name is Fred." David burst out laughing. The result was not pretty. We both had a great laugh, and we both forgot about it, or so I thought. Occasionally, when we were older, a group of us would go to Lake Placid, New York for the weekend. Several members of the shul owned country houses there. Our group, of about 6 to 8 people would take over the house belonging to one of them. One Shabbat evening, we were invited to someone else’s house for dinner. We all sat down to a huge dinner, and it just happened that David was sitting next to me. We were having a pleasant meal, and had just started on second helpings, when David turned to me and said: "You know, I have a great memory." "So?" I asked. "This is my chicken." he said. “His name is Fred." "Oh, really?" I replied. "My chicken’s name is Bill." He burst out laughing again, with the same result as 10 years earlier. I told him not to shoot me with my own weapon. During that same series of weekends away, we would sometimes go to Lake Placid on Saturday nights to have a drink. We went to some hotel, and David started sketching on a pile of napkins. Within about 20 minutes, he sketched all the members of the band and the waiter, and gave them the sketches. I did not know that he could draw. None of us knew that he could. He was extremely modest. When the waiter started thanking him, David started blushing and wanted to leave (which we did, shortly afterwards). On the way to Lake Placid one Friday, we stopped in Plattsburg to pick up some supplies. One item we picked up was a bottle of a smooth liqueur appropriately called "Loshon Harah." (gossip). On Sunday, we were preparing a barbeque dinner before the trek home. We quietly added a generous amount of the liqueur to the raw hamburger meat. We grilled the meat, and started eating. David took a bite, looked up, staring off into space, and said “There is Growing Up, In the Words of a Friend something in the meat that is not supposed to be there." We all laughed, and told him that we had spiked the meat. He looked up again, sighed and said, "What a waste of a good drink."

On Being True to Himself I just want to add that David rarely drank more than enough to be polite. In fact, the few times when alcohol was available, he would rarely more than taste it. One of the last incidents I remember was on Shavuos, 1987. (David was then 23 years old.) We were among the few people who managed to stay up all night. David was the chazzan for Musaf. Someone told him to daven fast, so we could all go home and get some sleep. David turned to us all before he started and said, "It is a Yom Tov; we are going to have a Yom Tov davening." With that, he began, using some very nice niggunim. To his credit, however, he did pick up the pace, and tried to finish a bit quicker. Growing Up, In His Own Words

In His Own Words David was a saver. Among the things he kept were some compositions he had written in school. On the assumption that he intended to share them, I include them here. Some are dated and some are not. I have arranged them in what I think is chronological order, based on the handwriting. Almost everything in this section was a school assignment. (A few were not.) We have no way of knowing what instructions the teacher gave and to what extent they had an impact on what he wrote. However, the creativity, ideas and expressions are David's.

The Angry Bear One morning, Ranger Person set out some wolf traps, which had a chicken hanging above them. A pack of wolves came, but they saw the traps and did not know what to do. Then, Waub the grizzly bear came. He also saw the free meal. But he did not see the traps. He started pulling one of the logs that held up the chicken. He was getting a little tired, so he sat down. But, oops, what is this? He had sat down on one of the traps. That sent him running and that was the end of him.

Now You See Him, Now You Don't December 16, 1973 Mr. Green was the best golfer in New Gilsburg. But, how did he get to be the best golfer? It was his friend Gilbert who helped him. Once, when Gilbert was experimenting to see what would happen if he mixed sulfur with salt water, he discovered an invisible spray. Whenever Mr. Green shot the golf ball, Gilbert (while he was invisible) would roll the golf ball into the hole. (When Gilbert was not with him, Mr. Green was very bad at golf.)

The Magic Elephant Jumbo the elephant's mother is the pet of Wizard Wonka. Wizard Wonka is a midget who lives in the outskirts of Valgaria. Their king was the meanest man on earth, Baron Bomburst. Nobody liked him, especially because of his worst law. He hated children. Whenever he heard that there were children around, he sent out his child catcher. Wizard Wonka wanted to solve this problem. He couldn't change Baron Bomburst's mind, or could he? Then he remembered that his aunt gave him a magic potion to change people's minds. He gave it to Jumbo. With his trickery, Jumbo slipped it into Baron Bomburst's mind and they lived happily ever after. Growing Up, In His Own Words

Some Big Problems (Editor's note: The moral at the end is part of the composition that David wrote.) This is Timmy. He lives on Cornfield Road. It was on August 3rd when it happened. Mrs. Topman, Timmy's mother, was ironing the clothes and Mr. Topman was reading the newspaper. Then the doorbell rang. It was the postman. Timmy rushed to the door, because he loved to look through the mail. There was one letter for his father, one letter for his mother and one for him! Quickly he ripped it open and read it. It said, "You, Timmy Topman, are invited to the school's dinner of the year!" Timmy jumped in the air as he hardly ever got mail and the dinner was to be made by the world's best cook. Timmy couldn't wait and he went to bed dreaming of a thirty inch pizza. The next day he dressed up in his best clothes and went to school. That day, most of school was to be delayed because of the dinner. Timmy was first in line down to the assembly room where there was a luscious dinner waiting for them. In the middle of the dinner, there was to be a pie eating contest, which Timmy was looking forward to very much. Timmy was selected by his class to go against the ones selected by the other grades. Now they were ready! Each one had a pie in his hand ready to start. Timmy had two in his hands because he had such an appetite. Ready, set go! They started – zoom, at the pies. Timmy's hands were going at the speed of lightning. At last, the three minute period ended. The scores were down on paper. Tommy, from grade one, had eaten ten pies. John, from grade two, had eaten twenty pies. Yanky, from grade three, had eaten twenty-six pies. Timmy, from grade four, had eaten 100 pies! David, from grade five, had eaten thirty pies. Dennis, from grade six, had eaten thirty- two pies. So Timmy won by sixty-eight pies. He must have been very full. Yes, he was full and fat! Timmy went to weigh himself. He weighed twelve tons. He was four feet tall and twelve feet wide. He had to lose weight, and how! Then, he knew he needed a doctor. Maybe he would know what to do. But the doctor didn't. Neither did any other doctor. So he had to stay that way. He couldn't fit in the car, so he had to walk. He needed unicycles to hold his fat all the way home. He had a little league game in football the next day, and he had to go. He thought he would lose for sure, but it was a sure win. All he had to do was run through them, and they all were down. (The moral of this story is not everything is bad about being big.) Growing Up, In His Own Words

The Stowaway (Editors note: This composition was not finished.) Johnny couldn't wait for the next day. He and his father were going to their cousins who lived in the country. They had many animals and Johnny couldn't wait to ride them. But one thing bothered him - his dog Rufus. He had told his cousins that he had a dog, but his cousins laughed at him because he wouldn't show them Rufus. Now why didn't he want to show them Rufus? Because they went to their cousins by train and dogs weren't allowed on trains. So this time Johnny had made up his mind. Rufus was coming, allowed or not allowed! Johnny had already figured out a way to stowaway Rufus on the train. He was going to bring his checkered blanket with him and in the blanket he would roll up Rufus. To make sure Rufus would be quiet on the trip, he would put Rufus right next to him where he could shut Rufus up when necessary. But right now, he had to go to bed! The next morning he felt great. He had just one problem, how to get up. Rufus had jumped up on his bed and was pulling the red checkered blanket off the bed. Johnny wondered why he was acting like that. Then he remembered. So, he got out his suitcase, packed it and rolled up Rufus in the blanket. He reached the car just in time to leave. When they got on the train, he covered Rufus' face so the inspector wouldn't see him. When they were finally on the train, the action began. When a man was walking to his seat, Rufus began to growl. Though Johnny didn't know it, Rufus wasn't what he was leaning on. He was leaning on a plain blanket! When Johnny woke up from his nap on the train, he realized that. But it was too late. There were people on the floor who Johnny thought had been knocked down by Rufus. But, where was Rufus? Johnny looked all over, under the chairs and on the luggage racks. Soon he became tired and fell asleep. When he woke up, the train had stopped. The men were unloading the luggage, but, what was that scratching up there? ...

Why Someone Should Have a Pet (Especially Fish) December 6, 1979 To some, a pet may seem to be a luxury, but I consider it a necessity. Having a pet gives the owner a sense of responsibility for the creature, besides the fact of having a friend. It's a fine feeling, because the pet is totally dependent on you and you can do with its life as you wish. When the being in your care lives a long, healthy and happy life, it means that you have done the right things for it. This can give a great sense of satisfaction. Fish may not be able to go with you and cannot play with you in the backyard like a cat or dog. However, all the other things I mentioned in the fist paragraph apply even more so in the case of fish. Other important facts about fish are the following. The movements of the fish are restricted to the tank in which they are kept. There are about thirty or forty different sizes and shapes of tanks and countless ways you can decorate them. There are also thousands of different kinds of fish that you can put in your tank. The good thing about this is that no matter how you decorate your tank, it will always be like another world sitting on your desk, dresser or wherever you have your aquarium. One common joke about having any pet is that it can never say a hostile word. Some people are afraid that a living pet might bite. This is where the pet rock idea comes in. The main reason for loving a pet is usually not for its quietness. The more one gives and the more time Growing Up, In His Own Words one spends with his or her pet, the more he or she gets to like the cat, dog, bird, fish or whatever. All I have said is from personal experience and I honestly do not know how I ever managed to live without a pet.

The Great Boredom September, 18, 1980 In the land of Gorn there was a great king by the name of Notindoin. Notty, as his friends called him, had one very great problem. He had a boring kingdom. In order to liven up the kingdom, Notty tried all sorts of things. At first, what he tried was innovative and a little bit interesting. But, the effects usually wore off within a week or so, and the people in the kingdom found themselves as bored as they were before. Since they were so bored, the people in Gorn tended to do strange things to keep themselves occupied. They would gamble, eat and paint their toes pretty colours. Some would even beat others up, just to keep from getting bored. One day, Notty called in his chief adviser, Mr. Takalatin, for their daily discussion on how things were in the various states within the kingdom. Eventually, their discussion led the great boredom that had been causing all the problems throughout the land. Said the king, "I understand why my countrymen are bored and listless, but why don't you and I get bored and therefore, act strange?" "I've noticed that very few people talk as much as we do." said the adviser. "That's it!" cried the king. The next day the wise king sent forth this proclamation, "From this day on, all work shall be stopped at the hour of four, and people should retire to their homes. From four until five o'clock, everyone shall find a partner. They should talk to one another until the hour is done." From this day on, all boredom vanished from the land of Gorn and the crime rate dropped drastically. It is a great shame that other lands never tried this method of boredom removal. Perhaps there is still hope. Who knows?

Expository Composition October, 1980 Madame Flutesnoot's annual cocktail and corn chip party is known as the social event of the season. People come from all over the country to meet this great "high-hatted" hostess. The unique factor in Mrs. Flutesnoot's parties is that she gets to shake hands with every one of her guests. This is probably helped by the fact that she has four arms. As for last night's party, the high point was probably when the famed professor Blob choked on his corn chips. The audience included all the famous actors and writers from around the globe. Mrs. Flutesnoot says that there will be many more parties to come. The parties liven up her house in which she lives alone most of the time. Since her husband's death, Madame Flutesnoot had been a bit of a hermit in her eighty-five room house. This is why I am sure all her friends are glad that "Snooty" is back out in society. Sorry. No drawing with this one. (Editors note: The teacher wrote, "Aw". David often illustrated what he wrote.) Growing Up, In His Own Words

On Winter in Montreal November 20, 1980 The cold wind blows through the empty city. All windows are boarded, doors are locked. Winter is coming! The call is buried by silence. A mouse scurries across the road, looking for shelter from the snows. The town has been abandoned. It is a cold November. The clouds darken on the horizon. Winter is coming, And everyone has gone to Miami.

Fame January 23, 1981 Everyone, at one time or another, wishes to be famous. In this composition, I will ask if fame is as desirable as we think it is. Recently, a movie called "Fame" was introduced to the public. This movie was not a happy one. It was one of frustration and the need for recognition. If fame is so desirable, why do we associate it with such sadness? It is true that in the movie, the ones in search of fame did not get it. But, I believe that one of the most important factors about the subject of fame is the need for it and the lengths to which some will go to achieve it. Once one has become famous, there are several ways to react (emotionally). The first is to get swell-headed and think that nothing is good enough for him. This person will not make many friends. The second response is much more common. The person in question becomes afraid of losing his "fame" status and may turn to drugs or liquor, or keep changing to please the public. Last but not least are the few people who managed to keep themselves emotionally stable and do their jobs, purely out of enjoyment. These people do their jobs best. Desire for fame comes from the need to be remembered. Fame can be achieved by doing one thing or many. It can happen, not only in show business, but also in business and politics, science or just about any other field. Fame can be used for good or bad. Above all, fame should only go to those who can handle it, for if the person loses control, he/she can bring him/herself to a disastrous end. Growing Up, In His Own Words

Should I Jump? January 23, 1981 Should I jump? I don't know. What if I missed the net? Why should I jump? Even if I were to survive the fall, what would I have to live for? All my worldly possessions will have gone up in smoke. They are yelling for me to jump. Why can't one of them come up on a ladder, the way they do it in the movies? I don't want to jump! Maybe the net isn't strong enough. Maybe I'll just fall right through it. I think it would be safer just to stay here and suffer a little smoke inhalation. It's such a long jump! What will I do? I wish Harry was here. He would know what to do; he always knew what to do. Oh Harry, where are you? I knew I should have renewed my insurance last month. I'll have nothing. I'll have to start over from scratch. All my things are here. What shall I do?

On Artists as World Leaders January 23, 1981 It has been said that there are people who could act much wiser than our present politicians, but that all those who qualify are too smart to get themselves involved. A great artist would definitely qualify for this category. Be he a portrayer in the performing arts, creative arts, fine arts or literary arts, all artists must have insight. In order to become successful, an artist must be able to understand how people think. A great artist has been accepted by the public and therefore, were he to become president, we could not insult him. [Note: Ronald Reagan was not a great actor at all. Therefore what I say in this composition does not apply to him!!!] Since an artist is a portrayer of people (characters, if you will) he learns to understand different kinds of people. As a result, when he meets with another political leader, he would be more likely to understand the other's way of thinking This would help in negotiating treaties and settlements between countries. The artist will also be able to understand his critics, his public and reasons for their behaviour, important factors in public relations. Indeed, I feel that a great artist as a leader would lead to a more effective government. Growing Up, In His Own Words

Unmasking (Editors note: This was not a school assignment.) Feb. 22, 1981 I've discovered in myself a new problem. I am too honest. Scratch that. I was getting mixed up. I have been doing a lot of that (forgetting what I was saying). What I meant was that I have been thinking too much. I am a firm believer that the world is in a state so drastically hopeless that the more intelligent a person is, the more of this confusion he "understands" and the more depressed he becomes consequently. On this line of thought, I said that I had been thinking too much. I mean that I have been studying the world too much. I have discovered a depressing outlook from a great number of different vantage points. This tends to be rather upsetting. Maybe one of the more surprising words which I prefer to use is the word "confused". I say this because this is the way I feel. I refuse to accept that this world can survive without any good whatsoever, and yet I believe that, socially especially, the world is in a hopeless state. On the other hand, I maintain that if indeed there was some good in the world, it would be impossible for the world to be entirely without hope. This could tie in with my view on the mask syndrome. It is feasible that everybody could be hiding whatever good they have in them behind their masks. When the average person looks at another average person, all that he sees is the other person's mask. Because he sees only the mask, he thinks that the person is his mask. The only possible way I can see to get past these masks is by introducing extremely open honesty between everybody, especially with people whom we have never met before. Just about the most effective way of establishing good relations between one man and another is to sit them both down together in a situation about which both men feel the same, and getting these two men to talk about anything except the obvious differences. Once this is accomplished, you may rest assured that these two men will find that they are very much alike in their thinking. Unfortunately, the ideal circumstances for such an encounter are not easily found. You need to be certain that the two (or more) subjects are completely willing and open-minded. Here is where you must start with the difficult task of the unmasking. Unmasking Psychoanalyzing somebody is one thing. Treating them is a totally different matter. This is something that I have found many psychiatrists and psychologists have forgotten. They think that once the problem is identified, it is solved. Identifying a patient's mode of disturbance is merely the first step towards helping this person to cope with him or herself. After a psychiatrist has identified his patient's problem, the next step is to make sure that the patient knows what is wrong with him, and even more, that he understands. In order to find out what is wrong with someone, you first have to get him to open up. Because of society's tendency to take advantage of the person who is open, when trying to get a patient to open up, you will have to be ready and able to pierce his protective shield, or as I like to call it, mask. The people around us develop these protective shields in order to save themselves from being hurt too easily (emotionally). To erase this mask, you have to convince the patient that you are on his side and that opening up to you would and could help him. Growing Up, In His Own Words

My Grandmother April 2, 1981 My grandmother is one of the most interesting and entertaining people I have ever met. The difference between her and other interesting and entertaining people is that she is interesting by being her same old self, whereas others learn a wide variety of special skills and expressions to be entertaining. As I remember, my grandmother has not changed much since I was very young. I used to think of my grandmother as the "fun" old lady who would visit us three or four times a year. I suppose that she has grown cynical with age, though to me it is amusing. I enjoy talking wih my grandmother. She somehow manages to always have her own unique way of putting things. My grandmother often tells me about my father and his two sisters. Since she runs a boarding house, she also often speaks of her former tenants. This is what makes my grandmother an interesting person. She talks about people, not things. Politics, sports, entertainment – none of these interest her. It is all people, past and future. Lately, her favorite topic has been her first great-grandchild. The last time she visited us, she was forever parading around the house exclaiming, "I'm a great-grandma." She likes to tell me how my father loved her strudel. I can safely predict that my grandmother will never change and I'm glad.

The Holocaust We cannot conceive the horror, and yet it was conceived by human minds. We try to understand it. Was it done by other kinds of people, were they different? Did they think while killing the weak and lame? And in the circumstances, would we have done the same? Such questions are quite difficult for ones like us, so small. For us, we must remember, and not let Judaism fall.

The World's on a String The world's on a string. It is a fragile thing. For it to hold fast, it must have a past. What's been forgotten and what's not yet come. Young Adult, Hachshara - Tochnit Shituf, Israel

Young Adult This section covers David's life from high school graduation in 1981, until he married in 1990. It includes his first year in Israel, his years in Yeshiva University and his single years after he made Aliya.

Hachshara - Tochnit Shituf, Israel While in high school, David had participated in whatever youth activities were available. He attended NCSY events and Shabbatonim, and also was moderately active in the Bnei Akiva youth movement in Montreal. However, because we lived far from the major neighborhoods where Bnei Akiva was active, David did not participate on Shabbat. As a result, he was considered on the fringes of the organization. This had an impact when it came time to decide what David would do the year after high school graduation, when the family went to Israel. Since at this stage in his life David had not yet developed a desire to learn intensively in a Yeshiva, and he had a strong interest in gardening/farming, he chose Bnei Akiva's Hachshara program. However, because he had not come up through the ranks and was only marginally a Bnei Akiva person, he was steered to a new program being run by the organization, in parallel with the regular Hachshara program. At that time, it was called Tochnit Shituf. The structure of the year and the nature of the activities were the same as the regular Hachshara program. The difference was in the participants, and in the fact that they worked on a Moshav Shitufi (co-operative only economically) instead of a Kibbutz. The year was divided into three portions. The first and third took place on the home ground of the group, in David's case, moshav Bnei Darom. The participants performed whatever tasks were needed by the moshav, that were also appropriate for the individual. In David's case, that was working with the chickens and in the avocado orchards, and fixing sprinklers and pipes for the irrigation systems. In addition, they had classes and looked after themselves (keeping their quarters clean, cooking, etc.). During the middle portion, called seminar, David's group was combined with a number of other regular Bnei Akiva Hachshara groups at Kfar Etzion, where they had lectures on the Shoah (a week), Hadracha (how to be a Madrich in general, with emphasis on Bnei Akiva - two weeks), and Jewish studies, e.g., Mishnah, Torah, Zionism, etc. (four weeks). Participants in the Hachshara program could choose to study in Yeshivot during this time, in lieu of these seminars. After the seminars, they went on tiyulim all over Israel. The eight members of David's group came from widely different backgrounds, religiously and educationally, and had very different reasons for participating in the program (unlike most of the regular Hachshara participants). David, who took everything seriously and who chose the program because he was genuinely interested in learning about the land and working it, found himself in conflict with some of the others who joined the program for what he considered frivolous reasons. He was highly idealistic and critical of those who seemed only interested in having a good time and whose religious standards were sloppy. After failing to get transferred to a different group, in typical David fashion, he withdrew into himself and went his own way. While on Bnei Darom, he introspected a lot, worked seriously on the tasks he was assigned to do, got along well with the adults on the moshav, concentrated on improving himself (e.g., getting to minyan regularly and on time) and continued his reading and artistic activities. He bought colored pencils and water colors in the local store and started by drawing scenery and the shul of Bnei Darom. Young Adult, Hachshara - Tochnit Shituf, Israel

David poured out his feelings and frustrations in journals. Sometimes, he would digress. In November of 1981, he wrote the following in one of his diaries: Today my discussion centers on the pet syndrome, though I can't hope to cover all the pertinent points. There are many reasons given (and some not officially) as to why people often find a need to adopt a creature of some sort. Among the explanations given are: sport, amusement, companionship, to do a specific job, curiosity about fellow creatures, need to feel superior, to relieve boredom. If I have enough time, I will explain each item on the list. Sport: This is a very simple one to explain. Man long ago discovered that he would need to establish certain activities to keep himself occupied and to exercise his competitive instincts. Unfortunately, in his competitive zeal, he often harms the animal by experimenting to make it run faster, stronger, jump higher, etc. even at the expense of the longevity of the animal. Still, through the strange and sometimes cruel world of "meaningless" rituals of animal sport, many actually develop a sort of affection for their dependent "pets". The major problem here is that if the animal does not win, its sentimental and monetary values sink rapidly. No, I would not recommend the world of sport to any animal I knew. Amusement: This situation is very similar to sports, but is much more light hearted. Let's be realistic for a moment. This section has many subsets. Consequently, it is indirectly tied to almost all the other sections. For some reason, amusement is one of man's major objectives. Sport is for amusement, at least that's how it started. Entertainment and music are for amusement. Because of the width and depth of this part, I am afraid I must not pursue this part for now. Companionship: This reason for having a pet is touching, interesting and also, slightly depressing. This is because I think that it is sad when a human cannot turn to his own kind for companionship. There is, however, a cheerful or at least pleasant side to this also. to be continued . . . (Editor's note: I consider this entry from David's journal relevant, because I think it shows how his digressions were a product of his social situation at that time. He yearned for a close friend to whom he could pour out his heart and who would share his feelings. Instead, he was among people with whom he was incompatible. Some in the group chose to amuse themselves at his expense. One result is this partial essay on the concept of pets, which he left unfinished.) During the seminar portion of the program, David participated actively and often debated the issues hotly. Once, during the seminar on the Shoah, David became really involved and excited when they were given garbage (e.g., egg cartons, broken plastic, newspapers), told to imagine that they were children during the Shoah, and asked to create something from it. (This was told to me by a fellow participant in that seminar.) On tiyulim, for example to the Negev, he was continually impressed and awed by what he saw and the fact that there was ancient Jewish history (shards of pottery, coins, ancient cities, and so on) everywhere in Israel. On his return from a three day hike to the Judean dessert, he wrote in one of his journals, "Until now, I did not realize the extent of the archeological Young Adult, First Year in College (CEGEP, Montreal) treasures in this land. Even in the mountains and old, dried up river beds, there are numerous proofs of inhabitants from other time periods." His life-long love of nature and appreciation of the physical world in which he found himself also had ample opportunity for expression, especially on the tiyulim. He enjoyed and marveled at the scenery, rock strata, trees, deserts, flowers, waterfalls, in fact everything that he saw. During this year in Israel, David exchanged letters with a number of people, including some of his high school classmates, men in our community with whom he had become friendly, his grandparents, and his cousins. In them he expressed concern about the future and how he would ultimately earn a living. He wrote about some of his frustrations with his roommates and his problems with the program. This was David's first year of not living with his family, although we did see him from time to time where we were living in Jerusalem. We also visited him once on the moshav. For the first time, his parents were not breathing down his back. It was the beginning of his starting to push himself. I also think that it was during this year that David became personally committed to making Aliya. By the end of the year, the short term plan was to return to Montreal and complete his schooling. Since David had no idea what he wanted to do in the long run, he decided to start in the local CEGEP (a pre-university community college).

First Year in College (CEGEP, Montreal) From September 1982 to June 1983, David attended Vanier CEGEP in St. Laurent (our neighborhood of Montreal). Fortunately, he was able to get a year of credit for the courses he took as part of the Hachshara program.

1983, The Family at Pesach's Bar Mitzvah Young Adult, Yeshiva University (New York)

At Vanier, he pursued a general program that included courses in psychology and anthropology, film and theater, English composition and literature, and the usual obligatory math and physical education courses. David did very well in his studies in the Community college. However, this was his first experience in a non-Jewish school and he did not feel at home. During the year, he socialized with some of his former high school classmates and friends in the community, but applied to Yeshiva University in New York (his father's alma mater) for the coming year. It goes without saying, that even while pursuing his studies and socializing, he pursued his other interests as well. He drew constantly and on anything that came to hand, both out of boredom (in some classes or to while away the time while waiting for something) and to develop new skills. He continued to dabble in gardening, although he was severely limited by the short growing season in Montreal. He corresponded with his brother Zvi who had stayed in Israel. He read voraciously, sang in the synagogue choir, tried his hand at woodworking and went for frequent long walks. During the summers, he worked for one of the men in our community who had an import/export business. In my opinion, the primary benefits of this year, in addition to what he learned in class and the credits he was able to accumulate, were his improved self-confidence and belief in his own ability to excel.

Yeshiva University (New York) David entered Yeshiva University in September, 1983, as a Junior (third year university) because of the credits he had accumulated from both Hachshara and CEGEP. He chose Psychology as a major. David was at Y.U. for four years, two as an undergraduate and two as a graduate student. He spent the first year in the dorm and during the last three years, he shared a rented apartment with a number of fellow students. He took two summer courses in Psychology at McGill university in Montreal. In 1985 he completed his BA degree. He then entered a program towards a doctorate, which skipped the master's degree. After two years, he dropped out and made aliya. He had completed the courses for a master's degree and had been told that he could complete the papers for it from Israel. Later, he found out that that was not 1985, College Graduation the case. During his four years in Yeshiva University, in parallel with his studies, David: was elected to the Psi Chi National Honor Society in psychology continued his painting and drawing was active in the Yeshiva College Dramatics Society Young Adult, Yeshiva University (New York)

was active in the Yavneh organization for which he also made a banner for a parade worked for the CAT organization that promoted Aliya for religious Jews was president and an active member of Club Canada worked in the Mendel Gottesman library of Judaica on the Y.U. campus regularly visited several house-bound elderly people in the community as part of a community project counseled families with a Down's syndrome child as part of his Psychology internship maintained an active correspondence with family and friends While in New York, David managed to bang his head on a kitchen cabinet door badly enough to have to go to a hospital for stitches. Also, for many years he had been suffering from digestive problems and intermittent abdominal pain. He went for many tests that produced negative results. I don't know why no one thought of lactose intolerance, which runs in the family. It was only later, shortly after he made Aliya, that David discovered that he was lactose intolerant.

August 1986, The Wolicki Brothers

Letters David's letters during this period were often filled with introspection and self-deprecating humor. They were also liberally sprinkled with illustrations. (See also, Letter to Us in Israel on page 50.) Years later, in a letter to his brother Eliav in New York, after asking Eliav if his five year old son had decided on a career yet and if he was taller than his father (among other Young Adult, Yeshiva University (New York)

similar comments), David wrote, "Aliza is looking over my shoulder and says I am getting ridiculous. I'm surprised she hasn't realized that it's the silly parts that make my letters worth reading. I mean, what would be the fun if I didn't go off the deep end at least three times in the same page?" He corresponded with us, his brothers, his grandparents, friends – almost anyone who would answer, and some who didn't. My mother, a severe critic, described his letters as "interesting and well constructed". His brothers complained about his spelling, but that was not important to him.

In one letter, when he wrote about the weather being stormy, he illustrated it with a cloud and lightning.

In another typical example, a letter dated May 3, 1987 (and continued on May 11 and 12), David announced his decision to make Aliya in the fall. He then proceeded to number (and illustrate) the problems this decision produced, as follows:

1. How do I 2. Can I get transport my and hold a belongings? job, without declaring Aliya and possibly losing immigrant rights?

3. How does (my service in) the Israeli army fit into the picture?

4. Is the price of tea in China (note tea bag) going to fluctuate as a result of my incumbent abandonment of the cause with regards to the American market?

5. Will I have proof of degree to present to Mr. Giraffi? (Editor's Note: A real name of someone who had some employment connections for David.) Young Adult, Yeshiva University (New York)

6. Can I survive another summer working in the library?

Later in the same letter, in a continuation written on May 11, more than a week later, David wrote and illustrated, as follows: "I looked in the mirror this morning and discovered a bloodshot, fatigued old man. Hopefully, we can pull me out of this. I think that one of my major problems is that I'm doing too many things at once. My constitution's love for simplicity has been bombarded by a hectic lifestyle."

Hectic Lifestyle Fatigued

Drama David was a member of the Yeshiva College Dramatics Society for the two years that he was an undergraduate student, from fall 1983 through the spring of 1985. In that time, he served in many different capacities including: stage hand, program artist, set painter, publicity chairman, and actor, often taking several jobs simultaneously. He participated in four shows: "JB", "The Petrified Forest", "Pinocchio", and "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat". With his deep booming voice and his practice of totally immersing himself in the character he was portraying, his contribution was always impressive. Usually, in addition to acting, David also served as stage hand. For Pinocchio and Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, David also designed the covers of the playbills and did the publicity. (The covers of the playbills are in Part II of this book under "Art – Logos and Covers of Publications".) A review of "The Petrified forest" in the Yeshiva College newspaper (The Commentator, April 11, 1984) described his performance as follows: "Perhaps the most memorable character of all is Jason's grandfather, Gramp Maple, splendidly portrayed by David Wolicki. Mr. Wolicki steals the show with his enchanting Beverly Hillbilly-type characterizations." In the play, he wore a beard and walked stooped, with a cane. His Grandma Wolicki, on being told, "That's David." did not recognize him. In December of 1984, when David played the evil Maestroni in the play "Pinocchio" we wanted to take David out to dinner the evening of the performance. He excused himself. He said that he had to take a shower, "wash off his old persona" and concentrate on getting Young Adult, Yeshiva University (New York)

himself into character for the performance. When we finally saw him perform, we were truly amazed at the transformation. By the end of the two years, David had been elected to the Alpha Psi Omega Dramatics Honor Society, had received one award as "Best Performance by a Supporting Actor", and had been nominated for three other awards, two for best supporting actor and one for best gypsy (behind-the-scenes worker). The faculty director of the dramatics society told David that he should consider dramatics as a career. However, David rejected that option as being in conflict with his observant Jewish lifestyle, in addition to being undependable as a source of income.

Club Canada Although David had been born in the United States, once he was among Americans, he felt very Canadian. After all, he lived in Canada from the age of eight until he graduated high school. So he joined Club Canada, and in the first year, became editor of "The Maple Leaflet", the club's publication. By his second year at Yeshiva College, David was president of Club Canada. In 1984, in his letter from the editor David wrote, "The Maple Leaflet is the channel for introspection and expression for those who have been forced to analyze their backgrounds by living in a different land and by encountering a forum for religious debate."

The Library David worked in the Mendel Gottesman library of Judaica during the four years he was in New York. Among other things, he was responsible for cataloging, filing, and generally organizing. He helped students access reference materials, organized periodical materials and entered them online in the Library of Congress, reorganized portions of the rare book collection, manned the circulation desk, and catalogued new entries. He was highly regarded by the people with whom he worked, who continued to correspond with him after he left.

Psychology David's choice of major was probably influenced by a number of factors. He really did not have a strong idea of what he wanted to do; his father had majored in psychology; he was very interested in what made people the way they were; and it seemed more practical than the various artistic branches that he enjoyed. As he did with most things that he chose to do, David threw himself into the study of Psychology. In May, 1984, David was elected to the Psi Chi National Honor Society in Psychology and, upon graduation (B.A.), he was awarded the Chaplin Hoenig Memorial award for excellence in Psychology. It was only in later years, that we realized just how thoroughly David absorbed and retained everything he learned. Anytime a question or discussion arose concerning Psychology, David proved to be well-informed on the subject and could provide the necessary information. Young Adult, In His Own Words

In His Own Words This section contains various documents that David wrote during his years in New York, and one description of him that he described as 90% accurate. It includes excerpts from letters, compositions written as assignments for courses, essays in which David just dumped his thoughts, and witticisms he wrote down. Together, I believe they help to understand David's thoughts and feelings at the time.

On Loneliness (short excerpts) October 16, 1983 Writing a six page letter to a friend is something you do when you have no one to talk to. It would be nice to have a friend, a good friend, a constant companion, someone to go for walks with, long walks. A girl with deep, penetrating eyes. An intoxicating smile and a laugh that grips your soul. A happy friend. An exclusive relationship. Alone. All alone. Together.

Description of One of David's Teachers (?)

October 24, 1983, David drew the picture at the right on the same page as these words. Furrowed temples Wild gestures, black shoes Stacks of books with chewed pages Conservative ties Bags under eyes Wrinkled white shirts and grey flannel suits. Wild, wild gestures.

Composition: Speak Up! You Can't Hear Yourself! Nov. 21, 1983, on dealing with frustration and expressing your feelings I often wonder about what the purpose of everything is. Then, once I define an abstract purpose, one of my greatest frustrations is applying it in a personal way, so that it has meaning for my life. There are several ways I can deal with this frustration. One way is to express it externally by writing, drawing, speaking, or even singing as loud and explicitly as possible. This approach enables others to better understand what is troubling me. As a consequence, when I behave in a given way, they will tend to interpret my actions more accurately. However, my problem is how to communicate effectively when I am in a state of frustration. It is imperative that, when one wants to make a point, to make sure that the point will be received in the right way. If one is not careful about how one expresses an opinion, he may defeat his main purpose. First and foremost, one must remain calm. When an individual says something in the wrong tone and style, he may be misunderstood, even when the choice of words is very accurate. This need to remain calm could mistakenly lead to the generalization that, in order to fight frustration, above all, one can not allow oneself to appear frustrated. However, in effect, when an oral expression of frustration is clearly communicated, it indicates that the person is still in control, not the frustration. Young Adult, In His Own Words

A more internalized, abstract and dramatic way of letting out one's problems is through drawing them on paper. A drawback to this method is that it may only be understood by those possessing a vivid imagination. Also, it takes considerable patience to express the frustration in concrete images. In addition to improving my communication with others, verbalizing my problems, or at least attempting to portray my frustrations visually, also brings me closer to analyzing them in order to grapple with them and reach a better understanding of them and of myself. We are all constantly striving for a better self-understanding. It is what enables us to reach a higher level of self-actualization, of realizing our potential. By helping others to see us as we are, and being coherent in expressing our thoughts (sometimes by rather unusual means), we can help ourselves to reach a higher level of self-understanding. Through this improved self- understanding, we can deal with frustration by simply eliminating the confusion on which it thrives. Editor's note: It was hard to figure out what David was trying to say. The instructor also had difficulty. I have tried to preserve David's words and ideas, where possible. I felt it was important to include this composition because it so intimately deals with some of the issues that plagued David, that is, his frustration with his own inability to live up to his own potential, his worry about the meaning and direction of his life and his tempe r.

Composition: The Morality of Mental Measurement Dec. 12, 1983, on the injustice of teaching superficial and boring material, and the difficulty of remembering it Among the things that I find particularly worthy of criticism is the over-emphasis on grades in the school system, which encourages students to achieve high grades, at the expense of morality. Students steal tests, borrow and copy homework, or even organize complicated ways to communicate with peers during an exam. This over-emphasis on grades also has an effect on those who do not stoop to dishonesty. Students find themselves absorbing information solely for the purpose of thoughtlessly spitting it back. Many courses try to cover wide expanses of knowledge in a short time. There is no time allotted for introspection and depth. However, because the student needs the "grade" and the credit, he will be forced to do just what will ensure a passing grade. When schooling consists mostly of general knowledge, the lack of depth may result in the course material being recorded only in short term memory. In other words, when your main purpose for learning material is to get a good grade or credit, then once the course has been passed, the information is no longer useful and is forgotten. No matter how general a course is intended to be, for material to be retained it must provide new insights.

Composition: Nutrition and Its Fruition Jan 4, 1984, on food and expenses Three months ago I left home to come to college in New York. Upon my arrival here, I discovered that living away from home includes many chores that I wouldn't have had to do otherwise. Foremost among my new worries has been how to feed myself, and still remain healthy and wealthy. In other words, I have had to learn how to eat cheaply, and not starve in the process. Young Adult, In His Own Words

The first new food source that every new student encounters is the cafeteria. I was no different when I came here and, for the first several weeks, I ate all of my meals downstairs in the "caf", trying to keep to a maximum of six dollars a day. Luckily, this university is populated with many more experienced individuals than I, and it was not long before I absorbed true "college food values". College food values are a function of the student's attitude compared with how much he has to spend. Some college students have been known to sacrifice sound dietary needs for monetary reasons. However, to minimize this, my peers had worked out all sorts of formulas to prioritize food related expenditures. One example, is justifying the acquisition of appliances. Eating in one's room for two months redeems the cost of a toaster oven. A refrigerator takes a little longer, but convenience evens it out. I have minimized the expense even further by having a roommate with a toaster oven and a refrigerator. The art of true parasitism is quickly learned in the college atmosphere. By using my roommate's equipment and learning to curb my urge for snacking, I have managed to keep my food expenses down to about four dollars, considerably less than the initial six dollars. Some find additional ways to cut expenses, such as working part time and getting invited to relatives for weekends. I do not like these alternatives because they limit my activities too much. My relatives live too far away and I have no time for a part time job. Like most, I have found a system that works for me. I usually eat in my room, but I occasionally venture down to the cafeteria for a decent meal. I have heard it described as the choice between eating like a king and living like a bird, and the reverse. I do what works for me. It is my body and my health, after all.

Composition: Man and His World Jan. 16, 1984, on appreciation of the world in which we live Criticizing man and his behavior has always been a favorite habit of mine. Today, my complaint is man's destruction of his surroundings as a result of his pursuit of progress, ignorance, apathy, and a lack of appreciation for his surroundings. There are many different ways man can show appreciation of fascination with our natural environment. Scientists may be interested in ecosystems that have developed over millennia. Or, a man like me can simply find himself in awe of the incredible variety of life forms that inhabit this planet. Poets often find solace in natural surroundings. Nothing is more inspiring for me than the feeling I get when I lie at the foot of a large tree and look skyward at the myriad of branches that constitute its upper half. It reminds me of a gnarled hand reaching for the stars, nature's umbrella, or sometimes, just an interesting piece of wood. The tree is stationary, and in the broader scheme of things, relatively small. Yet it can trigger such varied and vast feelings. As a child, I was fascinated with miniature worlds around me. I spent hours watching insects go about their chores, lifting rocks to find the universes beneath. Typically, children love to climb trees, explore their wonder, and try to reach the highest point. A childhood without trips to the zoo, mud pies, and caterpillars in jars, is rare. Then we grow up and make decisions about our environment. We flood land in the name of hydroelectricity. We acidify lakes in the name of industry, and we teach our children with machines. We lose the sense of being a small part of a larger world. Young Adult, In His Own Words

Modern man is concerned with the here and now. He is not concerned with the future and those who will inherit the earth. Modern man is wrapped up in himself. He has lost his concern for others and ignores his natural surroundings, because they remind him too much of his mortality, of how small he really is.

Composition: Idealism, or My WOT March 6, 1984, on David's World Organizational Theory (WOT) Words, words, words. I used to have many, but of late, I find only ideas. Thoughts that could move mountains, if only they could be expressed orally. Alas, in place of oratory, I resort to the lowly pen. I see the pen as a less than perfect instrument in that it lacks the expressive possibilities of conventional speech. Accents and facial contortions are lost in this tremulous translation of my personal revelations. Still, it is more peaceful to write. It allows long pauses between words, or even letters. More time to strengthen my arguments. More time to reflect on my reasoning. For one as introspective as myself, I admit, this is a plus. Now then, what are these fantastic imaginations? What plagues me? Why do I constantly waver between a calm collected character and one overflowing with imbecilic wit? My theories are circular, but they have a basis that, to me, is infinite. All that I have experienced and all that I have dreamed of experiencing has gone into what I call my WOT (World Organizational Theory). I believe that every individual has a WOT. Whether he calls it "perspective", "point-of-view" or "religion", every human being needs to create for himself a basis for reasoning, for explaining the why of the what, when, where, who and how. I am idealistic and my WOT reflects my obsession with ideals - ultimate truths that must exist, but don't and can't. (I am a realistic idealist.) My WOT believes that all people are essentially good. Everyone must have a justification for his actions. How can anyone act without reason? Even if that reason constitutes blaming someone else for providing an example or needed impetus, the action will be given a basis. Justification of the self is what enables the individual to retain the belief that he deserves to continue his existence. Woe to he who becomes objective when regarding his own person, for he loses his purpose, his humanity. Too many justifications, lack of universal values, misunderstanding and lack of interpersonal communication, these are the integral problems that we must deal with today. Let me rephrase my perfunctory presumption. I have expressed my belief in the deep-down good that exists in all of us. My dilemma is that I find it deeply frustrating when I see the overwhelming bad that roams in the face of existential good. The answer to my question, is that what I call good is actually something much more complex. I have already said that good is only universal in that everyone believes himself to be justified in his actions (at lease during the performance thereof).

Composition: The Beginning, Middle and End March 7, 1984, on the injustice of teaching boring material Boring! This is what I think as I sit half-mindedly absorbing the needlessly simple-minded balderdash that confronts me in English class. I have a head-ache. Why force myself to listen to this? I know that adjectives describe nouns. I use them all the time! Needless exclamation, undue emphasis on uninteresting interpretation of fact, these are what I recently described as examples of frustration inserted into the learning process, in a speech given in another course. Why endure it? Why relearn that every story has a beginning, a middle and an end. Young Adult, In His Own Words

It's a required course. The administration, in its infinite wisdom, has decided that in order to insure my literacy and expansiveness in education, I must sit and listen to an English professor profess. If logic determined school grade, this would barely make kindergarten. If I want to receive a diploma at the end of several long years, I must fulfill my requirements. Why do I need a diploma? Do I need a paper to certify my intelligence? Will I be a better person after the college experience? I doubt it. I fail to see how understanding and learning small segments will help my perception of the whole. Too often, appreciation for detail has been mistaken for better overall judgment. Why must I be taught how to think? To conform to the norm in thought processes doesn't impress me as a good pattern. Is not one of the fascinating, exciting facets of our world centered in the multitude of personalities inhabiting this earth? Billions of individual WOTs (World Organizational Theories) and WOAs (Ways Of Approach) provide a wealth of perspectives that never cease to provide new insights into the different aspects of our existence. Modern education has forgotten about results. They pay too much attention to travel, and too little to destination. We have expanded the beginning and the middle, but we have forgotten the end.

On the Interpretation of Poems I wrote a poem once, and I've been dead long since. Interpretations I have heard are prone to make me wince. Mystic spheres, long harbored fears, they tend to attribute to wit and verse, which meant to curse the taste of rotten fruit. So-called students, not quite prudent, correct my superb spelling. Words converge, then they emerge, with quite a different telling. That they don't choke on my bad joke in form of poetry, would make me laugh were I not dead. Instead I R.I.P.

ICKOZIBOBAYABLE The title is not a mistake. This poem reflects one aspect of David's creativity and sense of humor. Though life is rare and seldom slack I'll not receive my booties back for squigums lord is balazork when overrun by spastic dork in Yucksome leek for 'bout a week I sat in loathsome muck for ickies like their veggies old and thrive on fresh ground chuck. Don't go zap cause I don't tap or do some sweet ballet So york your ski, don't come with me and wallow in sorbet. I wish to split, so this is it, I'll bid my fond adieu. If you seek rhyme, you're in right clime, but meaning eludes yeux. (eyes in French) David's signature appears at the bottom of the manuscript of this "poem". Young Adult, In His Own Words

On the Future April 15, 1985 I need a goal, reachable, with difficulty, but necessary! I must. But, realistically, what if I don't, if I fail? I can't, I may not, I should not, but I may. The future? A wife? A partner? A Zionist? America? Israel? G-d knows! I don't. Curse it all! I wish I knew!

On Self Analysis and Loneliness Life is full of firsts and I've just experienced yet another. I turned off the TV with my foot - not even a clumsy movement, it was graceful and followed through like a well choreographed musical. Wow, am I ever vain! I wasn't always vain. I suppose that, according to Piaget, we all start out egocentric. I, however, am thoroughly convinced that until the age of 16 I was an introvert – not just any introvert either. I was the king of introverts. I lived in my own fantasy world, populated with super Davids and thoughts that could change the world. I was ruler of a realm in which the lion dwelled peacefully with deer and controversy had long been abandoned in favor of universal submission to a wise and eminently graceful monarch, Me. Then, G-d help me, I think I grew up. First, I started to voice my opinions, to assert myself and stand up for my bruised ego. I was challenged and met with fury at every step, but after some perseverance, some level of return to fantasy and some miracle, I survived. What is left? What is there now? I'm alone. I'm tired and I'm unsure. I don't know where to turn. I know where I am, but I'm not sure I like it. I'm scared. Time flies at an ever increasing pace. I want to settle down. I feel the need to share my most intimate thoughts with someone who is sympathetic. I need more than sympathy. I need downright altruism. A woman! I don't know why, but for some reason I prefer talking to women. The problem, my problem, is that I don't know how. They're different. There seems to be a system, but I'm not familiar with it. When I'm with someone I like, I just open up. I pour out. I overflow with emotion. I tell jokes and act out all of my more prominent failures. I entertain and I scare away any true emotional contact. Is there no one like me? Is there no one other person who wishes that she could dispense with society's bindings? I need that one person. I need someone to share with. I don't have to be depressing. It's just that I need someone who can deal with raw emotion. I spent 16 years holding it all in. I fought hard to find myself. I think that with the right partner/manager I could reach the start. All I need is an honest, straight-forward, intelligent, sympathetic woman!

On Being Understood I can make girls laugh. I can make them stop. But I can't make anybody understand me. Empathy, understanding and knowledge of others are not things that can be taught. It is partially for this reason that I often make my judgments about people on a first meeting. Young Adult, In His Own Words

On Meeting a Partner You meet somebody at the seashore, on a vacation and have a wonderful time together. Or in a corner at a party, while the glasses clink and somebody beats on a piano, you talk with a stranger whose mind seems to whet and sharpen your own, and with whom a wonderful new vista of ideas is spied. Or you share some intense or painful experience with somebody and discover deep communion. Then, afterward you are sure that when you meet again, the gay companion will give you the old gaiety, the brilliance, the communion. You remember the individual words from the old language you spoke together, but you have forgotten the grammar. You remember the steps of the dance, but the music isn't playing anymore. So there you are.

On TV I watch a lot of TV. Perhaps I've learned to believe that if I see enough happy endings, then maybe I'll one day live one myself. Still, every time I find myself at the end of yet another love story, I feel even further from happiness.

Wishful Thinking Why are there so many of us who feel that we must always be in the presence of someone who is enjoying himself? If we fail to live our own lives as we wish, we turn to the ever faithful media. Do we think that if we are with or exposed via remote control to some complete individual, it will influence our lives? Do we think that by absorbing the happy ending drivel, we will somehow also absorb some aspect of success and live happily- ever-after, as well? Well, take it from a TV addict. It doesn't work!

On Movies Good movie or bad, it's still a movie. Fiction or non, it's still a movie. People die, people laugh, they fall in love and out of it. When the credits roll, there I am on my own, vegetating.

On Being Down on Himself Goodbye, huh? Yeah, sure. Goodbye. The world's closing in on me and I watch a movie called "Goodbye"! It makes me feel like G-d's telling me to jump. G-d surely has a hand in TV programming. Why did he cancel Mork and Mindy? Maybe it's because there is no intelligent life on other planets. Intelligent life – what is intelligent life? Me? They tell me I'm intelligent, but that's just because they want me to stop breaking the furniture. They – my parents originally, then my teachers, now my boss, they – who do they think they are anyway? I know (or I think I know) that if I were them, I'd be nicer to me and those like me, well … most of us. After all, some of us can be pretty bad from time to time. Young Adult, In His Own Words

On Thoughts vs. Words I've been informed that some folks find my words amusing, or at least thought provoking. Just what thoughts are those that my words provoke? Are those thoughts "wordable". A thought is worth a thousand words. Given the multi-dimensional aspect of thoughts, the more ambiguous we are when we try to portray them, the closer we are to the truth that we, incidentally, never reveal.

What Is in a Name? What is in a name? I didn't choose it, but I put it to all I write. A name may often be the informal, yet decisive means of judging a person. When no other information is available, there is always the ever present name. Name is not a characteristic of the self, at least initially. It is an offspring of the parents' imaginations. What does he look like? What does he sound like? What does he smell like? What would I feel comfortable with? What would be cute? And so on . . . What will he have to go through the rest of his live with? Certainly the legal option is name change, but change your name and you've changed your self, your integral self. You must learn to answer to a new alias, a new and foreign self, much removed from past self. (signed, as shown below) David Daniel Wolicki, the 1st

Application to Graduate School In the spring of 1985, David wrote several versions of a letter for his application to several graduate schools. The following is the beginning of his first draft. I am David Wolicki. Since my completion of what is known as secondary school, it seems that I have clearly chosen my route in life with the intent that I be able to relate to all sorts of people. I spent my first year after high school in Israel. Being in a small group, far from home, I learned a lot about independence. I also developed a new work ethic, which has helped me in my studies. On the moshav, I learned that my workday was not over when the clock struck five, but instead, whenever the job at hand was completed. In addition to my work on this agricultural settlement, I attended classes in Judaism and Jewish history, and participated in workshops on youth work and the Holocaust. I was a teacher, youth leader, soldier, and student all over the land of Israel, and worked with all sorts of people. Young Adult, In His Own Words

When I returned, after my year in Israel, I enrolled in a public college in Montreal. This was my first true experience in a non-Jewish environment and I gained from the experience. I learned that there are views other than my own that must be recognized and do not necessarily conflict with my own. I approached that school with an open mind and much flowed in. I was also vice president of the Hillel group in that college and our main activities involved open houses and displays concerning the various Jewish holidays. In September of 1983, I came to Yeshiva College. I came partially because I had been led to believe that it represented the epitome of the open-minded Jewish university that I had been seeking. Discovering that it was less than I had hoped, I immersed myself in extra-curricular activities and tried to ignore what I did not like. Letters that he actually sent out omitted the above and looked like the following. I enjoy working with people. I am a good listener, and theories that have been postulated for the purpose of understanding behaviour intrigue me no end. I suppose that these statements best summarize my reasons for studying the field of psychology. Upon nearing the end of my undergraduate studies, I find that I have only touched the surface of what can be learned in my chosen major. I hope to eventually be capable of functioning well in this field and that a graduate program in psychology at xxxx University will help me towards this goal. I specifically would like to attend xxxx University because it is known to be a quality institution and quality is indeed what I seek. I look forward to learning possible practical applications of what I have learned so far, as well as alternate and updated theories. I am particularly interested in child development theories and how the school experience affects them. Another interest of mine is the concept of Umwelt (a psychological term meaning the environment that is meaningful and effective for a given species, i.e., nature in relation to man), peoples self-perspectives and their resultant behaviours. I like to think that I have had a well-rounded undergraduate career. My years in Israel and Montreal helped to expose me to many different teaching methods and peer groups. In addition, I have been involved in numerous extra-curricular activities. I am currently president of the psychology honor society in which I have been active since I came to Y.U. I am also active in the Canadian club, for which I was editor of the Maple Leaflet (their publication) and of which I am currently president. I am an active member of the Dramatic Society and am currently in my third show produced by that group. I currently hold the position of Director of Promotions. Last year, I was awarded the best supporting actor award for the 1983-84 season as well as inducted into the Alpha Psi Omega national dramatic honor society. In addition to these affiliations, I have been organizing an art club and hopefully we will be exhibiting at the upcoming spring festival of the arts here at Y.U. I like to think that I have proven my competence through my perseverance. I take pride in the belief that I have learned from my experiences and would enjoy the opportunity to continue them at xxxx University.

On Feelings March 11, 1986 The Note at the end was written by David and is part of the original. Feeling good – a subjective experience, that is in part contingent upon other's subjective ideas. All ideas are subjective, else they be fact, in which case they merely represent an individual's triumph over subjectivity. Young Adult, In His Own Words

Feeling good – an uplifting experience brought out by a shower, a good night's sleep , or a financial boon. Feeling good – an experience perpetuated by others with equally good feelings. This enables us to safely adventure into further competition and hence, due to positive thoughts and actions, further success. Feeling good – an experience dependent on the definition of feeling bad. The relative experience helps determine the interpretation of present phenomena. Feeling good – a potentially long-lasting effect dependent on learned behaviour that helps to maintain such a status. Feeling – an inate potential elicited by external and internal phenomena and subsequent subjective interpretation of said factors. Feeling empathically – vicarious experience, adopting another's subjectivity and hence becoming one theoretical subject with that individual. Identification with another often spurs action in favor of the subjective interpretation of the other's feelings, which are in turn, subjective interpretations of external and internal phenomena, as well as extraneous empathic influences. Wow, am I deep! (and tired) Note. The author of the above thoughts in no way purports to have thoroughly defined feeling and related influences. These merely represent the free associations elicited by the subject's having taken a shower this morning, and hence, his temporarily awake, aware and refreshing state of mind.

Personality Test Results David sent us a letter containing the following results of a standardized psychological test done on him on December 22, 1986. As he says, he gave it 90% for accuracy. My supervisor showed me an interesting test based on colour preference. You choose between a number of different colours and pick one of each pair that you prefer. This is also done with various shapes. It doesn't sound like much, but it is based on considerable research and the results are impressive. I'm enclosing a copy of the report this program generated on me. I think you might find it interesting. My own personal reaction is that the report is amazingly accurate, though it occasionally misses something. I give it a 90%. My chief complaint is with the over simplistic conclusion "Things to Consider" and the lack of specific examples (which are, of course, out of the range of this test). The report also describes my present situation and approach, without noting how well or poorly I function within it.

The Luscher Profile ™ Copyright © 1986 Mindscape Inc. and Dr. Max Luscher All Rights Reserved Profile for David Wolicki Your Mood Right Now You feel your current conditions are intolerable and unreasonable. Therefore, you desire conditions which are tranquil and which guarantee absolute and reliable satisfaction. Young Adult, In His Own Words

Your Needs, Desires and Goals You have the determination to assert yourself and to confront any challenges and difficulties you face. You want quiet stability and considerate and personal regard from others – especially from those closest to you. Lack of attention, respect, or injustice disturbs you. You critically observe the world and are sometimes difficult to please. You try to master each situation by advancing cautiously and objectively and by establishing your superiority. What Motivates Your Behavior You want to distinguish yourself and hope to achieve important goals. Therefore, you guard against submitting to inner weaknesses, to the need for pampering and contentment, or to self-pity. You want to assert yourself and to prove that you're equal to the demands placed on you. You only indulge yourself when you're certain the circumstances allow you to do so with no dependency resulting. You guard against dependencies. However, by being so vigilant, you may lose the abilities to maintain a healthy perspective on life and to relax. If you continue this way, you run the risk of exhausting yourself. What You Need to Cope with Stress and Problems Your current situation is unreasonably demanding. Because of this, some of your important needs remain unfulfilled and, for the time being, you've lost a sense of inner peace and calm. You want to protect yourself from irritations and intolerable confrontations, so you're keeping your distance from others to avoid arguments. Protecting yourself this way will allow you to regain the calm inner peace you so urgently need. How You Respond to Challenges You want to live intensely. You enjoy tackling challenges, and want to experience things to their fullest. You assume that others share your interests, and expect them to be enthusiastically supportive. As a result of your energetic activity, you want to achieve success and to have your presence recognized. In the process, you experience a strong feeling of fascination and enthusiasm. What You Expect From the Future You are uneasy about your prospects for the immediate future. Therefore, you tensely monitor events as they unfold. You have the ability to respond quickly and sensitively to adverse conditions, and you are on guard against being excessively trusting. :You are a critical observer, which may lead others to perceive you as being detached. This is your way of protecting yourself against criticism and of trying to establish your independence. Things to Consider Your liveliness and curiosity make you open-minded and willing to embrace life. You should guard against being over-enthusiastic and perhaps swept away by your zeal. At those moments when you feel strongly interested in something, try to find an inner detachment. Listen to the opinions of those you respect, then make a mature and thoughtful decision about how to proceed.

On Who He Is October 9, 1986 Life can be strange. I suppose, we all know that. My life is in a greatly confused state. It has been for some time now. I don't know what I want to do with the rest of my life right now. I do know that I'm not enthusiastic about my present, but my future concerns me even more. Young Adult, In His Own Words

In an attempt to better analyze my present situation, I will review my history to date. You, the reader, may find this interesting and you may not. I hope that you will find comfort in the knowledge that you are not alone in your confusion. I would like to make sure that I am understood. I do not mean that because I am miserable, I want company in it. Rather, I believe that the realization that others think similarly and somehow survive, gives the rest of us hope. I am not a pessimist. I am a realist. There are some aspects of myself that I love and there are others that torment me day and night. The great diversity of what I am confuses me and compels me to review its development. While I am sure that I will, unwittingly, omit some factors, it is also probably true that what I remember is probably what most influenced the development of my "self". I will start with my family background. My father's side of the family is Polish. My father's father was raised in Germany and though I do not truly remember him, I am told that he possessed the stubborn, stolid stance characteristic of that culture. My grandfather met my grandmother in America. She comes (She was alive at the time that David wrote this.) from a considerably more rural background and embodies the practical, unimposing attitude associated with the classic "Yiddishe Mama". If I were asked to differentiate her from others of her background, I would be hard-pressed. I do not pretend to know the nation. She is a nice lady who worries about her children and rejoices when they do. She is amiable, enjoys company, is independent and avoids burdening others with her problems. Somehow, through all this, her concerns are expressed and her understanding of how our young minds work reflects insight that one may not attribute to her immediately. I always get the feeling that she knows considerably more than she reveals. I don't know if she is different from others, but that's my grandma "in a nutshell". My father is the youngest of three children. In a sense, he was born with baby sitters. His two sisters are nine and ten years older than he is. I rarely see my aunts, and then only on special occasions. Regardless of what they are truly like, they impress me as very "American". Unfinished

On Talent I sit on my own, contemplating the relevance of it all. Time is a dreadful thing to waste. With friends, it is easy to do. Alone, staring at walls makes for boring conversation. This is what turns man to philosophy. Philosophy is the art of contemplation. Everyone is a philosopher - an unwilling one, but always a philosopher. Ah, the many ways that our teachings may be interpreted. We make our generalizations vague so that they may have wide applicability and controversy. Spouting gothic words in a play, a strange and yet meaningful pastime, some may even call it an art - the art of using someone else's words to portray someone else's philosophy. Don't call it an art. Art is the viewer's interpretation, often biased, especially when he knows of the artist's reputation. One does not have to be talented to create something meaningful, but it helps. To create something meaningful and original takes uniqueness, another great word. We are all unique and therefore, everything we do is unique. Then what is talent? Young Adult, In His Own Words

Talent is the mode by which a possessor of such is able to convey a finite philosophy to an infinite audience. The ability to portray the same thing to different, unique individuals is indeed a talent.

On Self Expression David's talents included an excellent voice and ear for music, a gifted command of pen or pencil and dramatic abilities that were recognized when he acted in plays at Y.U. This essay expresses some of his agony over his need to be creative and express himself, and his difficulties with finding a way. Stagnation is being given three free hours and throwing them back; it is senseless stupor; playing with one's fingers while dreaming of endless wealth. Man has a tendency for reflection at the most inopportune times. When faced with an emergency or useable minutes, this two-legged lummox is only too often beset by glum stupor. He whirls in space, but his physical being shows no sign. Stagnation: rotting bones and dying brain cells, being overwhelmed by the need for self- expression. Some try song; syllables uttered accompanied by tremulous tones; sounds that lift the soul and then drop it uncaring, unconcerned. Songs always end. The composer loses the idea, has no more words, has no more sound. Silence isn't song; it is a dirge. Some try art; visual expression that is as fascinating as it is personal. How can an artist hope to convey what he feels? How can he capture his past and present in paint and canvas? Well conveyed feelings through art provoke thought. But, it is not uniformly perceived. Some try to act: becoming someone else while losing one's self is not acting. To act is to explore a facet of one's self, to understand one's own infrastructure, the roots of each individual aspect of emotion. Acting is a true introspective art. And yet, to act is also to put on a play, to convey this insight to an audience. It is to pour libidinal energy into self- expression, to communicate, to show the workings of an inner self. But is acting supposed to serve the audience, or to help the actor express himself? At the end of a show, reality intrudes. The anticlimactic results are draining, leaving the actor quiet, completely expressed out, laid back, peaceful, lonely and introspective, thinking about his inevitable end and back at stagnation.

On the Infinite Capacity of Man Perspective is a dirty word. It implies that a point of view may be identified. What is man? Who is man? When man assumes that he could possibly explain himself in mere words, he assumes the impossible. How dare he! How dare we! How dare we live our daily lives without constantly recognizing the infinity with which G-d has endowed us. The ultimate paradox is that in man's infinitely inexplicable nature he still may not be defined as perfect. Man is infinite to (his fellow) man. Man is infinite in that no matter how well a man thinks he knows another, he may never totally enter another's world. Man's personality is infinite. However, man's mental capacity is finite. No matter how much a man learns, he can always learn more, but he cannot learn everything. Young Adult, In His Own Words

On the Mystery of His Existence Sometimes I just want to curl up and sleep for an eternity. Eternity is a relaxing word. It sounds permanent, when we know that the concept of permanence only exists in our minds. Why do we always seek out what is safe? Why can we not do what we feel we should without consulting that infernal logic within? Long measures of time spent in deep thought can be as disturbing as they are relaxing. Insight is as much a curse as a blessing. The damned paradoxes of living! Why did I have to be intelligent? The expression "of blessed ignorance" is more than a phantom of some philosopher's imagination. It is a truth recognized by anyone who has the nerve, as I have, to question his own existence. The paradoxical behavior of certain individuals in our society almost never fails to send my once clear thinking mind into metaphysical oblivion. Why the hell do we do stupid things? Why do I find that I am more and more compelled to write my thoughts down on paper? Will anyone ever care to read them? Why did I choose to major in psychology when like most people I've met I assume that I already am an expert on the subject (not to mention, countless other subjects). It is a hard world to understand, in the most objective of terminology, a veritable cholent of paradox, defensive action, self-deception and just plain stupidity on the part of so many.

Letter to Us in Israel November 2, 1986, near the end of his studies at Y.U. in New York

Well, here I am, abandoned in this spiritual wasteland they call N.Y.C. But, I don't want to depress you by endlessly recounting anecdotes to support my dysphoric mood. Suffice it to say, I am down in the mouth. I do cheer myself up with the thought that I have come to a decision which will hopefully eventually pull me out of this. and the עליה This decision involves rural life to which I believe I am more suited. Cosmopolitan I am not. Educated? Yes. Smart? Yes. Nice guy? Yes. American? No!

So, what am I doing here? I guess, I'm trying to finish school for its own sake. I was hoping that the realization that I would not follow psychology as a career would take off some of the pressure, but unfortunately, this has not proven to be so. I forsee some very great demands on myself, academically and I question the importance of burning myself out in the name of a masters degree. I am increasingly concerned with my and feel forced to make a choice . Rational being that I am, I've decided לימודי קודש neglect of to weigh the alternatives carefully and only then rush into some senseless endeavor. Young Adult, In His Own Words

Later, in the same letter, describing someone who David believed had been gossiping about him, words seemed inadequate to David. He inserted this illustration to supplement.

October 1, 1987, a few months before David made Aliya I miss you guys. I don't miss the noise or the fuss, just the people… bodies… whatever. I've got zero left here. It's very lonely but it makes it easier to leave… No loose ends – clean break and all that rot.

See also "Letters" on page 33.

One Liners David was a master at coming up with amusing expressions and one liners. Most of them are not recorded. The following are a few that I remember. David labeled our first car in Israel, a Citroen, a "lemon" mobile. (It wasn't a bad car.) He referred to his brothers and their wives as: Mr. and Mrs. Zvi, Mr. and Mrs. Eli, Mr. and Mrs. Benjie and Mr. and Mrs. Pesach. It is truly amazing how little one can accomplish in one week. Young Adult, Single, in Israel

Single, in Israel David arrived in Israel in November 1987, just before his 25th birthday. He moved into the basement of our house in Neve Aliza, in Ginot Shomron (Karnei Shomron). In the basement, he had his own room and bathroom. In addition, he used half of the laundry area for some of his "things", such as art supplies, power tools for working with wood, and the like. The basement also included a room with a ping pong table. This room opened onto a porch that looked over the valley. David took advantage of the magnificent views and continued his drawing and painting. He was supposed to be finishing some papers to complete his advanced degree in Psychology, but that never happened. He had become disenchanted with Psychology as a profession. He felt it would be more productive to pursue activities that would fulfill his dreams and help him become the person he wanted to be. At this point in time, those activities were learning in a yeshiva, gardening (with the goal of living and working on a moshav), and woodworking. In the next three years, until he married in 1990, David did many things. He applied to the Bezalel art school in Jerusalem, and was turned down. He took gardening jobs around the neighborhood. He worked for a while in the local grocery, doing everything and anything that had to be done. This experience turned out to be very useful later when he applied for and got a position with the Supersol chain. Although he dreamed of living on a moshav and working in agriculture, he realized that it was more practical to be married first. Once you go to a moshav, you are not likely to meet anyone. Also, most of the moshavim were interested in couples. So, he was biding his time. In the meantime, he decided to spend some time in a yeshiva.

Yeshiva Although David had attended yeshiva day schools all his life, he had never become comfortable in the sea of Jewish learning. He felt guilty about that and was determined to address that lack in himself. To that end, in the spring of 1989, he chose Machon Meir in Jerusalem as the best environment for him. They catered to older students, many with advanced degrees, but most with little or no background. In retrospect, it seems to have been a good choice. One of his fellow students of that time remembers him as, "soft spoken, always smiling, well mannered, and someone who had time for everybody". In later years, David always remembered the yeshiva and his teachers fondly, and never failed to send them regular donations. He also began regular study habits. By the end, he was leading a regular Halacha session following Mincha at work, participating in a regular Gemorah shiur on Friday nights with other men in his community, regularly learning Mishnayot, and continuing to study subjects of particular interest to him on his own. One subject that particularly drew him was the laws that relate to agriculture in the land of Israel.

The Supersol Period While David worked in the local grocery, did gardening, went to yeshiva, and continued his artistic activities, his base was our home. He kept busy, but he was not happy. What he really wanted was to find a wife. However, he was not meeting anyone where we lived. An opportunity to be trained in management for the Supersol chain came up, and David grabbed it. After a brief training period, he was assigned to a store in the Kiryat Yovel neighborhood of Jerusalem. Later he was transferred to the Ramat Eshkol store. Young Adult, Single, in Israel

He worked both as a manager and as a worker in a number of different departments. Among other things, he became familiar with the entire store inventory, learned to clean fish, and learned to carve meat. Although, he quickly came to the conclusion that his future was elsewhere, he stuck with it because it gave him independence and more opportunities to socialize . During this time, he lived in a shared, rented, furnished apartment in Jerusalem. At one point, he became bored, and was itching to use his artistic skills. The landlady gave permission to use one of the bed pallets for a painting. David painted an aquarium and hung it on their living room wall. One of David's roommates, David Ziants, was so taken with it that he kept it. It now hangs on the wall in his children's room.

Fish Tank Mural Original: .8 meters high (31.5") x 1.9 meters (6' 3") wide After David's death, David Zaints wrote to us about David. He said, "David was one of the best flat mates I had, being very easy going and tolerant. He was very happy to talk and give advice, and he was a great friend." Early in 1990, on the occasion of his brother Zvi's 25th birthday, David made a sign for a surprise birthday party. It so impressed and amused Zvi (as it was intended to do) because it included a picture of Zvi's stuffed panda bear, Mikey, in addition to the usual birthday stuff ( cake, balloons, and a bluebird of happiness), that he kept it.

Actual size: 35 cm h x 90 cm w (14" h x 75"w) Young Adult,

In the end, David met his wife through us. Aliza's neighbor in Petach Tikva worked at Orot where Saba Wolicki also worked. She suggested the match. Once David met her, he moved fast. They met in May. A week after they met, he brought her to the Brit of one of his nephews (Benjie's and Penina's oldest son, Menachem). By June, they had made up their minds. The wedding took place in October.

Married

Married David and Aliza were married on October 18, 1990 (the 30th day of the Hebrew month of Tishrei, 5751). David and Aliza moved into an apartment in Jerusalem, while David continued working at Supersol and arranged to move to a moshav. In January of 1991, they moved to moshav Maon. David was excited about finally getting on with his life in the direction he wanted. He and Aliza immersed themselves in the agricultural and communal life of the moshav. But it was not meant to be. After a year and a half, it became clear that David's style was not compatible with that of the other members of the moshav. David and Aliza,1990 In June of 1992, David and Aliza left the moshav. For both idealistic and economic reasons, they decided to buy a home in Ginot Shomron, not far from our home where David had lived when he first came to Israel. We were in Netanya by this time, but David knew the community there and remembered it fondly. Also, there were some new homes available in the right price range. In 1995, David spent a week doing his minimal army service. He had made aliya at an age that the army wasn't particularly eager to have him. In addition, because he had had hepatitis as a child, and had tricky knees, after basic training they released him, permanently. David tried out a number of different professions before finding a niche for himself in technical writing. At the same time, he kept himself busy with his other interests, painting, gardening, woodworking, learning new art media, and reading. David was active in his community as well. He attended and participated in local shiurim. His deep melodic voice and knowledge of the Nusach were appreciated when he davened for the Amud. Above all, David and Aliza prayed for children. Married

Painter One of David's first projects after moving to Ginot Shomron was a landscape to be hung over their sofa in the living room. It included many of his favorite elements, that is, trees, sky, weathered wood (on an old barn), and fields of grasses and flowers. David also included morning glories growing up the side of the barn after both he and Aliza had read about it in a book. To help him, David accumulated many pictures and studied them. He took photos of scenes, trees, and flowers. Like many things David did, this painting was large, and developed as he went along. I remember discussing it with him on several occasions. He executed it in several stages, and would gladly expound at length on how he intended to create a feeling of depth and perspective by doing it in layers. He worked particularly hard on the clouds, the coloring in the sky, and the old wood of the barn. He worked in one bedroom of their new home and used almost all the space. David and Aliza took pictures of the painting in the stages of development. When he finally decided it was finished, he made a frame for it from scratch. He did not take any short cuts. He bought wood, stained it, and finished it. David was particularly proud of this painting and it graced his living room wall, setting a tone and color scheme for the whole room. David and Aliza called the painting their first baby because it took nine months to complete.

David at Work Married

"First Baby",1993 David at Work David's first job after moving to the Shomron was in a local butcher shop. However the salary was disappointing. Clearly, this was not a good option for the long term. David then tried a number of different directions before settling down to his final profession. After working for a brief time for a printer, he was offered an interesting position trying to find bugs in a new program. This was David's first serious exposure to computers. However, that, plus his college degree, and an inquiring mind, qualified him for the position. By the time he left that position a year later, he was writing the user documentation for the program. Again, he reached a point where the pay and future were not promising, so he accepted work in another field he loved, carpentry. While he learned a great deal about the work, he also learned that he was not cut out to spend the rest of his professional life making cabinets for someone else. Married

He began to consider becoming a technical writer. He had had a taste of it during the year he had worked on the computer. In addition, I was working in the field and was able to share my experiences with him. The demand for technical writers was rising, and the salaries with it. It was certainly a more promising field than the other jobs he had been doing so far, in addition to being less physically strenuous. In 1993, he was accepted for a position as an entry level technical writer at a company called Fourth Dimension Software. (The name of the company was later changed to New Dimension, and finally to BMC.) Initially, his immediate boss (and the woman who hired him) was someone he had first met on Hachshara, years earlier.1 She told him to bring his resume, a writing sample and his Hachshara pictures. She told me she had hired him because, among his other qualifications, she remembered him as intelligent, serious, and reliable. From that point on, he learned on the job. David was fortunate to be working with an experienced team. Alan Perlman was put in charge of a major project, and David began to work under him. He told me that David applied himself, and sponge-like, absorbed everything about the work and the product he was documenting. At one point, after he had made great progress, he considered transferring to a better paying position. However, when advised that he still had a great deal to learn and would be better off staying with an experienced group, rather than working where there were no other writers, he stayed where he was. After a few years, David was again frustrated by his inability to advance. In Alan's words, "He was woefully underpaid." With the passage of time, David felt that although he was technically qualified for advancement, it wasn't happening. In 1997, he moved to National Semiconductor, where I had worked until a year earlier. I was able to vouch for the fact that it was a company that treated its employees well. While he was there, in addition to substantially improving his salary and working conditions, he acquired new skills. Meanwhile, his former colleagues from Fourth Dimension Software kept in touch with him. They told him that he was badly needed and begged him to come back. In the meantime, Fourth Dimension Software underwent organizational and name changes. They were now BMC and were using tools that David was using at National Semiconductor. In addition, they remembered his work style and knowledge of their product. Since he preferred documenting software to documenting hardware, and he was able to negotiate new favorable conditions of employment, after a year, in 1999, he went back as a "lead writer and technical resource" to what was now called BMC. It turned out to be a good move for him. Finally, David had found a professional niche that suited many of his talents and provided him an adequate salary. Sometimes, his style caused problems between David and his fellow workers. He was very intense and outspoken about his opinions. Although his intentions were good, they were sometimes misunderstood. He was totally committed and super-focused on the task, the work and the job, sometimes to the detriment of social relationships. As a result he was sometimes perceived as self-absorbed. However, his wide knowledge was respected both by his fellow writers and the developers with whom he worked. Several of his colleagues said of him, "He was simply never wrong. He always had the correct answer to any question about how to use a tool or application, on

1 This account and evaluation of David in the workplace is based on interviews with Michal Berman and Alan Perlman, both experienced technical writers who knew David during the entire eleven years he worked as a technical writer. What is interesting is that at different times, both also served as David's supervisor and co- worker, and worked under him. Married content of any of the manuals or on the software being documented." He had zero tolerance for goof-offs or dishonesty. He always delivered what was required on time. Another colleague, Izzy Cohen, who also worked with David the whole time he was at BMC, said, "David was the only writer at BMC who had a complete understanding of the entire product suite, how it worked, how it was marketed, how it was related to other products, and what BMC's plans were regarding the future of the product." David was a regular at the BMC Mincha minyan. After the tephilla, there was also a brief talk, usually related to Jewish law. After the previous person stopped leading it, David took on the responsibility. When questions arose, if he didn't know the answer, he would research it, and give the answer the next day. At lunch the BMC writers used to play a word game called Balderdash in which a person picks an obscure word from the dictionary and the others suggest possible definitions for it. Points were allotted for the correct definition. In addition, the others would vote for what they thought was the best definition. Sometimes a totally incorrect (often humorous) definition would be voted the best. David participated actively and excelled at this game. Sometimes, David would use his acting skills to do voice impressions that often had others in stitches. He had a very innovative and sharp sense of humor.

Husband and Father After David and Aliza had been married almost eight years, Miriam Chana was born on July 23, 1998 (Rosh Chodesh Menachem Av). Words are inadequate to describe both David's and Aliza's feelings. Everything else paled to insignificance by comparison. No matter what else David was doing, he never lost sight of the importance to him of his wife and family. He began a journal to his daughter, in which he wrote his thoughts and feelings about her, the future, and other things. He felt the need to communicate with her, even though it would be many years before she could read and appreciate those words. David and Aliza would have liked to have many children. They were granted one more, Chaya Hadassah, born on March 22, 2003 (18 Adar B). For her too, David began a journal. Unfortunately, he didn't get very far. She was only 14 and a half months old when he died.

2004, David and Miriam Married

David worked in a high pressure environment that had cycles driven by releases of the product he documented. As a valued and experienced worker, he was expected to put in overtime when it was required. However, it was paramount to him to be home at a time when he would see his wife and daughters. Since that meant he could not stay late, his solution was to go in early. Most days, he left his house at 5:30 in the morning to get to work at 6:00. Then he would leave to go home by 5:00 in the afternoon. This was often not appreciated by his fellow workers who may not have been aware of how many hours he worked. In any case, he had his priorities. It was rare that he gave in and stayed later. On one occasion, when his work group went on a day long outing without families, they stopped on the way home. Everyone in the group took advantage of the stop to get souvenirs and refreshments. 2004, David and Chaya One of his fellow workers told me of how impressed he was that David's only interest was to find something to take home to his wife.

Extended Family There are numerous testaments to David's devotion to his brothers and their families, Aliza's parents, his sister-in-law and her family, and his nieces and nephews from both sides. He was always there. He was often consulted for advice on tools or how to do something and freely gave it. Some of the things he made for them were bookcases, a bunkbed ladder and railing, blocks in a rolling hassock, toys, and a doll house. For us, among other things, he made a coat closet for our entry, and covered a box for boots in the same material.

Reader David was well read and conversant on many subjects. He liked knowledge for the sake of knowledge. There was nothing that did not interest him. He read voraciously. Since he would often borrow books from us, I saw some of the books he read. Usually, he was in the middle of four or five books on different subjects at the same time. They included his furniture and woodworking books, gardening books, books on philosophy, manuals relating to technical writing tools and technology, light frivolous fiction, classic fiction, world and Jewish history, and books on various art media and techniques. What I found most amazing about his reading is that he seemed to retain what he read. Many people read, but most do not remember all the details of what they have read. David did. Also, to David, reading a book meant reading all preliminary information (e.g., forward, preface) and footnotes, checking out all references, and reading any information added at the end of the book. When he had to learn a new piece of software, he read the manual, cover to cover. As a result, he knew everything it could do and how to do it. Married

One of the most maddening things about David's reading is that while he was reading, you couldn't talk to him. He would be totally immersed in what he was reading.

Student of Torah David internalized the principal that study of Torah and related topics should be a regular part of every person's life. However, his formal experience in school left a great deal to be desired. As in all things he did, David seemed to have to find his own way and time.

On His Own In a letter to his brother Eliav (who was then in Israel) in September of 1984, while David was in New York, he wrote, "I've made myself a resolution. I want to learn a Mishnah a day." In a continuation of that same letter on the next day, he wrote, "I just spent a good half hour breaking my teeth over the Hebrew in the Mishnah Kahati. I did it! I breezed my way (more or less) through two whole mishnayot, complete with commentary. Ooh my head." Three years later, he was still walking around with a pocket size Mishnah in his pocket and he was still learning at least a Mishnah a day. As I have already written, soon after he made Aliyah, he immersed himself in the yeshiva world for several months without any distractions, until he felt he was on the right track. He never stopped finding time for Torah study, whether at work or at home. When he and Aliza moved to the Shomron, he joined a group of young men who studied Gemarrah every Friday night and took turns leading the group.

The Chaburah The Chaburah is a group of about six men in Ginot Shomron who meet every Friday night to learn Gemara. One of the members of the group, David Danziger, consulted the others and provided the information included here. David joined the Chabura right after he moved to Ginot, in 1992. The Chabura meets at the homes of the members in rotation, with the host preparing the Gemara and acting as leader. When David was host, he was ALWAYS prepared. He didn't take the responsibility lightly. He was heads above all of us when it came to agriculture and all things related. When there were references to other texts, no matter what they were, he always took the time and effort to look up the sources, and usually had them ready and open on the table. This also applied to less traditional sources, such as Encyclopedia Talmudica, botany, history, and so on. He always insisted on looking up the full text of sentences from the Torah that were referenced. An approximation of the words was not good enough. He favored the simple "Pshat" (the direct interpretation of text) over the "Drash" (allusion or inference). He wasn't one to create a "Pilpul" and find meanings that were not clearly there. David would argue respectfully, and once he had an idea or explanation that he liked, you couldn't budge him easily, if at all. Throughout the "Machloket" (discussion) he always had a smile. He definitely enjoyed the give and take of the debate. David lived the furthest from the rest of the group. However, he rarely missed a Friday evening, unless he was away for Shabbat. He always arrived first, in all kinds of weather. When he was the host, David tried to improve everyone's health by offering healthier snacks. While the others would put out fattening foods as a nosh, he provided carrot sticks!! That, plus the walk, made the members feel virtuous whenever the Wolickis hosted. David also served less healthy but more popular snacks, in addition to the carrot sticks. Married

Gardener In a letter to his brother Eli in New York, David (with his typical self-deprecating humor) wrote, "Most of the big news makes it to the papers over in your part of the globe. Surely you noticed that article in the gardening section of the Times about my raspberries." (Three paragraphs later, he continues.) "My raspberries are turning color, and that means we'll soon get to see whether it was worth planting them. I think that it probably was. There you are. Until now, you were probably the only person I hadn't told about my raspberries, and now you know too. I think Aliza's happy if I only mention them to her six times a day (or less… or even less). I suppose there are worse vices, (like talking about it too much)." David expressed the same very personal interest and enthusiasm about everything he planted. Their attached house had a small yard in the front and another in the back. In addition, since they were the end house in a row, David took it upon himself to maintain a small area on the side of the house. David made the most of every inch. David expanded his knowledge of gardening by reading gardening magazines and books on the subject, and then trying out what he read. Whenever I would ask him about a particular plant that wasn't responding well to my care, he would proceed to give me the scientific name, the popular name, and a complete detailed description of the growing conditions it required. David created a compost pile in the back of his house. He planted several kinds of trees, ornamental bushes, raspberries, vegetables, and flowers in front and back. In the front, he mapped out what he hoped would be a kind of rock garden, with a path. He experimented with many kinds of plants. Most of the vegetables and flowers he grew from seeds. Sometimes he took cuttings from my house plants. Of course, under his care they flourished. He took particular pride in his gardening results and was eager to share the produce. Near the front corner of the house, David planted aravot that were suitable for use in lulavim at Succot. He made a point of telling everyone in the community that they were freely available. However, he insisted on cutting them himself to ensure that it was done correctly. He wanted to make sure that the pruning would be beneficial to the plant, and would only encourage improved growth. David was particularly interested in the laws that apply to agriculture in the land of Israel. In time, David became so knowledgeable in this area that people learned to turn to him for information. He had plans to write a book on the subject and had even gone so far as to prepare an outline for it. It particularly bothered him that so many newcomers to Israel are not aware of these laws. He would go for walks and come home aggravated because he passed yards where things were planted in violation of these laws. Married

Wood Craftsman At the same time as his other interests, David continued to work with wood. He read woodworking magazines, and continued to expand his knowledge. He practiced to hone his skills. David planned and executed many wood projects for home improvement, for his own enjoyment, for the enjoyment of his children, for others in the family, for others in the community, for gifts, and for possible sale. David was feeling burned out at his technical writing job. He had dreams of leaving it and going into business, selling things he had made. Unfortunately, most of the items he made were very labor intensive, and would not bring in enough money to support a family. In any case, he had started to accumulate items that would sell at a crafts fair, such as, trivets, toys, and silhouette pictures. Wood projects at home included: • floor to ceiling, wall to wall closets for two bedrooms (he never finished the doors) • a linen closet (with doors) in a niche, with a clothes chute to the laundry area • a clothes closet (with doors) in a niche, in the entry, for hanging clothes • a display box for his many knickknacks • a floor to ceiling, wall to wall, shallow storage cabinet for all his art supplies • a corner desk and shelving built into the corner of a room as an office for Aliza • a solid wood collapsible trestle table • a pergola for the succah • built-in, floor to ceiling, and wall to wall storage cabinets in an extension room • woodworking cabinets on wheels that housed his tools and provided workspace • a lockable storage area, just outside the front door, for outdoor tools • a three section wall unit with glass doors, shelves, and drawers, in the living room • a matching built-in cabinet that maximized use of the space under the stairs (he had to break open the space to do it) • toys for his own children, for his family, and for friends Wood projects for family included: • projects for his nieces and nephews (for example, trucks and a doll house) • a two-door clothes closet • recovering a wooden storage box with formica to match the clothes closet • a wooden box of blocks on wheels, which also served as a seat and a padded footrest • a ladder for bunk beds • a wooden silhouette sign for his brother Benjie's home, with the family name • bookcases, a desk unit with shelves, and a utility storage unit for his nephews and in- laws Wood projects for others in the community included: • a custom made table arrangement for a child who could not sit at a regular table • the mechitza for the local Bnei Akiva group • planning of a wall unit for his shul, and execution of the Hebrew letters for it Projects for gifts and possible sale included: puzzles, trivets, silhouette pictures, and toys. Married

The Windows When approached by his community to do stained glass windows for his shul, he at first refused, because he didn't know how. However, he hated saying no. So he decided to learn how and do it. David was meticulous in following the sources, mostly Midrash Rabba, when he designed the colors and content of the windows. At one point, when I complained that the choice of background colors was not appealing, he insisted that the colors were not negotiable. However, the fact that many of the stones from which the banners got their colors are found in nature in many different hues did give him some artistic freedom. In addition, sometimes he used the color specified for the banner of a particular tribe in the Midrash for the frame and sometimes for the background. Unfortunately, we do not have explanations for all the cases where he seems to have deviated from what is written, but I am certain he had a good reason for his decisions. Although he prepared carefully before starting the project, David learned a great deal while execu ti ng it. There were many challenges. David c onsulted Rav Oron of Ginot Shomron regularly and they decided to respect the prohib i tion on representing images of animals (worshipped by many pagans) or of people in house s of worship. Every design was discussed with and approved by Rav Oron before David execu te d it. David worked hard to come up with designs that expressed the reputation of each particular tribe without using any animal images. In add i tion, although ideally the most durable media in which to execute the designs would have been real stained-glass, cost considerations dictated otherwise. Instead, David simulated staine d glass using special paints designed for that purpose. Unfortunately, after completing several windows, he learned that not all the brands were equally durable under the existing condit i ons. Later, he took down the first two windows, which had faded badly, to try to fix them. David d id everything himself. He researched the material, planned the designs, drew the patterns, painted the windows and even climbed on ladders to take down and return the finished windows. Although David succeeded in completing the twelve large windows, the full scope of the project actually also included the smaller window above each of the large windows. David did co m plete the design for these windows, but not the execution. His plan was to use the color t h eme for the corresponding large window and to write the name of the tribe in the center . He sta r ted the project sometime in 1998 and finished the 12th tribe window approximately five years later. Each window is 1 meter (39 and 3/8 inches) high by 70 centimeters (27.5 inches ) wide. I have all the original full size drawings. I have a dream that maybe, someday someone will approach me for the designs of the windows and execute the complete project in real stained glass. David was asked to prepare a description of the windows to explain the background and source s for a possible brochure. He started, but never finished it. The description I include here is based on the material he wrote, plus whatever information we could get from others with whom he discussed the project. Married

Introduction From the time I was first approached to design and paint illustrated windows in our synagogue, many people approached me with a wide range of questions. The purpose of this pamphlet is to answer these questions and to add some further background information. I hope that these words will lead to greater understanding about the background of my windows project and to a better appreciation of a somewhat neglected Torah topic.

Background Gershon Spund asked me to prepare colored windows for our synagogue. I responded with surprise, and explained that I had no experience in this medium. However, he was not deterred and said that he had every confidence that I would be able to learn this skill very quickly. His obstinacy and persistence achieved their goal. I began to research the topic and slowly a plan took shape. Initially, I didn’t appreciate the scope of this task. If I had understood it, chances are that I would not have undertaken it. However, I have to point out that I feel greatly honored to be able to contribute to my community utilizing an artistic medium which is so close to my heart. I want to thank Mr. Spund. Without the faith that he showed in me, it is hard to believe that I would have achieved what I did.

The Theme It was our good fortune that the windows of our sanctuary are arranged in twelve columns. Therefore, the natural decision was to depict the twelve tribes in these windows. Perhaps there is an additional significance to the fact that all of the people of Israel would be represented in our synagogue, as our congregation represents an ingathering of the exiles and demonstrates how unity creates a beautiful and unique atmosphere.

The Sources The main sources that describe the distinguishing characteristics of each of the tribes of Israel and the blessings (בראשית מ"ט ,are the blessings that Jacob gave his sons (Genesis 49 In addition, some of the .(דברים ל"ג ,transmitted by Moshe to the tribes (Deuteronomy 33 tribes are mentioned in the books of the prophets and writings because of their famous descendants. After some searching, I decided that the source that would serve as my primary guide throughout the project would be the following one from Midrash Rabbah. Bamidbar Rabbah (Vilna edition) 2:7. (במדבר ב"ב ,According to the Banners” (Numbers 2:2“ From these words, we learn that there were distinctive banners for each prince (i.e., tribe). Each banner had a different background color that matched the color of the precious stone of that tribe on the breastplate that was worn on the heart of Aaron2. It was from this that governments learned to provide themselves with banners of different colors. Each tribe had its own prince and its own banner, whose color corresponded to the color of its stone.

2 Often the banner did not match the color of the stone. Married

Content and Colors of Each Window

Reuven – The stone was a ruby. The color of the banner was red, and embroidered thereon were mandrakes.

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Shimon – The stone was a topaz. The color of the banner was green, and embroidered thereon was the city of Shechem (Nablus). Editor's Note: The window shows the gates of the city in the foreground. In the background, David included Mount Grizim in green, and Mount Eyval in brown.

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The color of the banner was one third white, one .(ברקת) Levi – The stone was a smaragd third black and one third red. Embroidered thereon was the breastplate (the Urim and .(אורים ותומים ,Thummim Editor's Note: A smaragd is described as a greenish stone, possibly an emerald or morning star. However, since the Midrash described the background explicitly as white, black and red, David remained true to the source.

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Judah – The stone was a carbuncle. The color of the banner was the color of the heavens. Embroidered thereon was a lion. Editor's Note: Again, since the Midrash described the color of the banner explicitly as like the heavens, David made the background sky colors instead of red, the color of a carbuncle. Even though the Midrash states that a lion was embroidered on the banner, to avoid using the image of an animal, David's window for Judah shows a crown and lyre to indicate King David, the most famous descendent of the tribe of Judah. However, the crown and lyre are positioned to suggest a face and beard under the crown.

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Issachar – The stone was a sapphire. The color of the banner was blue/purplish black (like stibium or antimony). Embroidered thereon were the sun and moon in allusion to the text, “the children of Issachar, men that had understanding of time” (I Chronicles The Radak comments on this verse, “Our rabbis .(דברי הימים א י"ב, ל"ג ,XII, 33 explained that the people of the tribe of Issachar knew how to determine when leap years should occur and to fix the beginning of each new month.” Editor's Note: David and Rav Oron wanted to avoid depicting images of the sun and moon, which are also commonly worshipped by pagans. David included the names of all the months in circles to allude to the moon, since the Jewish year is lunar. The Sefer Torah in the center reminds us that people of the tribe of Issachar were also known as teachers of Torah to young children.

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Zevulun – The stone was an emerald. The color of the banner was white. (See second version of the window.) Embroidered thereon was a ship, in allusion to the text “Zebulun shall (בראשית מ"ט י"ג ,dwell at the shore of the sea.” (Genesis XLIX, 13 Editor's Note: David was careful to depict a model of a ship that was common in biblical times. It is also interesting that the colors in the windows appear very different, depending on the source of the light, i.e., whether you view them during the day or at night and whether you are inside the building or outside.

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Dan – The stone was a jacinth (orange color). The color of the banner was similar to sapphire. Embroidered thereon was a serpent, in allusion to the text “Dan shall be a (בראשית מ"ט י"ז ,serpent in the way.” (Genesis XLIX, 17 states, “Dan shall judge his people as (בראשית ט" ט"ז) Editor's Note: Genesis IX, 16 one of the tribes of Israel.” The scales represent judgment, and the scales are decorated by a hint of the serpent that was on his flag.

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Gad – The stone was an agate. The color of the banner was neither white nor black, but a blend of black and white. Embroidered thereon was a camp, in allusion to the text “Gad, a troop shall troop upon him.” (Genesis XLIX, 19, (בראשית מ"ט י"ט

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Naphtali – The stone was an amethyst. The background color of the banner was like clarified wine of a not very deep red. Embroidered thereon was a hind, in allusion to the text (בראשית מ"ט כ"א ,Naphtali is a hind let loose.” (Genesis XLIX, 21“ Editor's Note: Naphtali's portion of the land of Israel was richly fertile and produced sweet fruit. The famed Ginosar valley was in their territory. Therefore, again to avoid depicting an animal, the window instead shows the seven species with which the land of Israel was blessed (i.e., wheat, barley, grapes/wine, olive oil, pomegranates, dates and figs.

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Asher – The stone was a beryl. The color of the banner was like the precious stone with which women adorn themselves. Embroidered thereon was an olive tree, in allusion to (בראשית כ" ,the text “Asher, his bread shall be fat.” (Genesis XLIX, 20 Editor's Note: When the sun shines through this window, the color of the tree is like the color of olive oil.

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Joseph – The stone was an onyx. The color of the banner was jet black. Embroidered thereon was Egypt for both princes (his sons, Ephraim and Manasseh) because they were born in Egypt. Editor's Note 1: The translation of the Midrash Rabbah on which this material is based includes an explanatory footnote. I have taken the liberty of paraphrasing it here. This passage on Joseph is not quite clear. Although there is a reference to a banner for Joseph, in fact, there was no separate tribe of Joseph, nor is it clear what is meant by “embroidered thereon was Egypt for both princes”. It seems to imply that Ephraim and Menasseh were included in one twin flag. The background was black and Egypt was depicted across the whole flag. On top of that a horizontal or vertical line divided it into two, with each part bearing the device of the particular tribe, that is, a bullock for Ephraim and a wild ox for Menasseh. Although it is possibile that they each had a separate flag, placed side by side, while a third flag represented Joseph as a whole, this option seems less likely. (In keeping with the first explanation, David decided to handle the tribes of Ephraim and Menasseh under the banner of Joseph.) Editor's Note 2: The striped talit that David chose to depict on Joseph's window represents the striped coat that Jacob gave Joseph. The wall behind it alludes to Its branches" .(בראשית צ"ט, כ"ב) Rashi's commentary on the words in Genesis IL, 22 run over the wall." This is a reference to the physical attractiveness of Joseph. He was so handsome that the daughters of Egypt would climb over the wall to gaze at him.

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Benjamin – The stone was a jasper. The color of the banner was a combination of all the twelve colors of the tribes. Embroidered thereon was a wolf, in allusion to the text," .(בראשית מ"ט, כ"ז ,Benjamin is a wolf that raveneth.” (Gen. XLIX, 27“ Editor's Note: The window border in the colors of all the tribes symbolizes the participation of all the tribes in the building of the Temple, the Bet Hamikdash, which was located in the territory of the tribe of Benjamin. Instead of the image of a wolf, David shows the Bet Hamikdash with its radiance and its marble walls. At its side is the eternal flame with the cloud of glory over it.

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In His Own Words In addition to all of his other interests and activities, David was thinking about writing. He played with ideas for books for children, documents related to technical writing, and a book about gardening according to Halacha in Israel. Sometimes, he just wrote essays to let off steam. I include here, whatever we found. Like other things that he wrote in earlier years, I believe they reveal the man who wrote them. In 1992, in a letter to one of his brothers, David wrote, “When I finally get around to writing a book, I'd like to write a book that does something. Not just another novel that people read and forget about. The goal as I see it, is to make people think, and to keep them entertained while they're doing it.”

Compassion Grandpa Dwork died just before the holiday of Pesach, in 2003. This was probably written in December in either 2001 or 2002. I do not know if David ever mailed a version of this letter. I know he intended to do so. Dear Grandpa Dwork, I heard that you are ill, and I felt a strong need to let you know that our hearts – here in Israel – are with you. I know that your birthday is also just around the corner, so let me take this opportunity to wish you well. I'm very sorry that we are not able to be with you at this time. Despite our many reasons for living here, times like this make us wish that the distance were not quite so great. You are the only grandfather that I have ever known. Though we did not see you very often, I can tell you that it was always with joyous anticipation that my brothers and I awaited your arrival for each brief visit. As a grandfather, you gave us your perspective. You proved that, regardless of the size of our family, there is a certain "spice" that only a grandfather can add. I am sorry that my daughter has not had the opportunity to meet you. That is all there is. I think this letter reveals more about David than it does about "Grandpa Dwork". The actual visits were few and far between. However, to me it is significant that David chose to reach out to an aging and distant "grandpa", and express himself in a way that would bring comfort and pleasure to him.

Freedom After David participated in a demonstration and was arrested, he was asked to write about his experience for the magazine of the New Synagogue of Netanya for their Pesach 1995 edition. Background In late 1994, the Zo Arzeinu organization began a campaign to try to double the number of settlements in Yehuda and the Shomron. The residents of Ginot Shomron, including David, went to a hill top nearby that was privately owned and sat down. The army should not have been able to declare it a closed military zone (in which anyone not leaving the zone could be arrested), but they did anyway. When the army arrived to chase the demonstrators away, David started to walk back slowly in the direction of Ginot Shomron. One police officer approached him, presumably because Married

David was not moving fast enough, and asked him if he wanted to be arrested. David was non-committal. He shrugged his shoulders and answered, "I don't know." The policeman promptly told David to get into the bus. Aliza did not hear about his arrest until she saw him behind the barred window of the police bus on the news that evening. They were taken to a police station, and later transferred to Tiberias. The first evening, David was separated from most of the others who had been arrested (about 21 in total). He was placed in a cell together with two others that he knew and some drug addicts. They took turns sleeping that night. The next day, they were transferred to the same area as the others. Among those arrested with David was Yosef Begun. Yosef had been a prisoner of Zion in Russia. When they came before the judge in Tiberias about 48 hours later, Yosef Begun told her that he was honored to have been arrested in his country for such a worthy cause. David later spoke of feeling honored to have been in prison with a prisoner of Zion. A year or two later, when the case finally came before a judge, his case, and that of most of the others, was dismissed for lack of evidence. Only a few of the most active participants were instructed to do community service. The Essay Some weeks ago, I was arrested for expressing my political opinion. As a result of this, I and twenty other equally innocent individuals were temporarily incarcerated in a prison in Tiberias. When the tale of my experience reached certain ears, I was requested to write down my feelings on the subject of freedom on the eve of Pesach, the holiday that celebrates the freedom of Israel. It would be chutzpadic in the extreme for me to compare what I went through with our forefathers' experience in Egypt. We were imprisoned for two days by people who, while not always sympathetic with our cause, were at least correct in their behavior toward us. Our forefathers were enslaved for generations, and their taskmasters were less than kind. Never one to let chutzpa stand in the way of doing something, I have decided to accept the challenge of finding the connection between my short stay in prison with the enslavement of Bnei Yisroel some two and a half millennia ago. Many of our sages point out that Bnei Ysroel's stay in Egypt was preparation. The fact that Hashem took us out of Egypt places us in debt to him, and we agreed, in return for this great service, to become servants of God. In our service to God, we have found true freedom. Those of us raised under the primarily Christian influence of the Western world sometimes have trouble understanding the idea of freedom in servitude. If we sublimate our desires, and obey all the many laws of the Torah, how can we call ourselves free? My brief stay in prison helped me resolve this question. When my friends and I were locked up, we naturally tried a number of different ways to keep ourselves occupied. Some exercised and some slept, but all of us found one common area that occupied the lion's share of our time. We studied Torah. Much of what we studied was from memory; some discussions jumped from subject to subject; but we all found comfort in the laws that our ancestors received at Sinai when they chose to serve God so many years ago. The Torah that was presented, on our entering God's service, protected us from feeling truly imprisoned. The sages tell us that our forefathers were released from bondage in Egypt because they held onto their Jewish names. What was so special about these names? The answer to this is evident on close examination of the names of the children and grandchildren of Jacob, who Married

went down to Egypt. These names are replete with recognition of God's role in their birth and the future that was to be theirs. Bnei Yisroel held on to the names that showed their recognition of a power much greater than Pharoh, who was responsible for their enslavement. They still identified themselves according to the names of the children of Israel, the twelve tribes. For this reason, God saw fit to justify their belief by a spell-blinding display of miracles that defied all rational explanation. Upon removing us from the influence of Egypt, God saw fit to bestow upon us the laws of the Holy Torah. The gift is much more than just a body of laws. It is the eternal protection from bondage. As long as the Torah is our guide, we can never be truly imprisoned. God gave us this additional protection from bondage because names were no longer enough. It was admirable that Bnei Yisroel retained their identity while in bondage, but upon release they needed rules to guide them. Freedom carries many dangers. The Torah helps us realize our true potential, while at the same time, protecting us from the many aspects of freedom that try to enslave us. May it be God's will that we will soon see a great return to the Torah, that bastion of freedom, and may this return soon make us worthy of yet a greater return in the person of the Messiah in our days. David Wolicki

Pressure Written in 2001, when David was 37 years old. The doctor asks me if I'm under any pressure. I have to laugh. Pressure? Tension? When am I not under pressure? It seems that my entire life is one big pressure cooker. One day somebody is going to open the lid and I'll hit the ceiling. It is true that some of the pressure is self-imposed. I have a long list of things that I want to do, and there never seems to be enough time. Here I am, 37 years old, and I'm trying to figure out how soon I can retire so that I can do all those things that I keep putting off. Aliza was just explaining to Miriam the other day about how, "Abba is always busy." It's true. How else will I ever finish anything? I try to do something "constructive" each day. It's only a "drop in the bucket", but at least some things get done. After eight years, I'm finally close to finishing a unit under our stairs. I started several months ago. It is true that I did something a bit fancier than most, but I want to feel good about what I'm doing. So, I try not to "cut corners". My only hope is that the finished job will look good enough to have been worth the investment. How do you measure that? I guess it's the feeling of satisfaction that I get when I finish something.

Yesterday I painted the wall above and next to the unit under the stairs. It took me about one and a half weeks to build up layers of plaster until the wall looked as it should. When I finished painting, I stood back and studied what I'd done. I do this frequently with projects in process. I step back; I look from one angle and another. Yesterday when I did this, I felt good. That's a rare feeling. It makes it worth all the effort. Married

Soon I have to start working on the last two big windows for the shul. I hope they give me that feeling too.

Terror David probably wrote this between 1999 and 2004, between the ages of 35 and 40. The word terror has a lot of implications. The concept involves random violence that is carefully planned. The idea is that, using relatively few resources, a small group can inflict "terror" on a large population. The feeling (it creates) is one of hopelessness - the feeling that there is nothing that you can do to ensure your safety. Actually, there is something you can do. But, it seems that by removing yourself from the area under attack, you are in fact rewarding the terrorist. This is not just a matter of pride. If we give a terrorist what he wants, we are re-enforcing terror. We are sending a message that "terror works". What then can we do? We need to send a message that "terror doesn't work". In order to do that, we have to determine what terror is meant to accomplish. Once we've done that, we can then set out to find out how to make it clear that these objectives will not be reached using terror. Regardless of the actual case, terror always works towards two types of objectives: • It attempts to create fear (a secondary objective). • It sends a message that fear will be alleviated if we give in to the demands of the terrorists (the primary objective). Fear is difficult to prevent. However, it can be moderated by leadership with a well-defined plan for dealing with the object of fear. For this reason, many people feel somewhat better when our government acts against terror. When actions exist, we perceive that our leadership is handling the problem. The effect may be illusory, but it may also be necessary to maintain the collective sanity of a population that is subjected to random terror. Let us now take a look at the primary objective. In order to pass on a message, a number of things are necessary: • The act of terror must be associated with the terror group. Since acts of terror are anonymous when they are performed, the claim of responsibility becomes necessary. Without it, the terror group can make no demands. • The message must be clear. • The message should be passed as publicly as possible. Terror works on the masses and aims to cause those masses to pressure the authorities to accede to certain demands. • The demands must be feasible. If the demands cannot be met, then they will not be met. Demanding the impossible is not going to lead to results. • The target of terror must believe that, if demands are met, the acts of terror will cease. In addition to all this, the terrorist walks a fine line. If an act of terror is too horrible, public opinion will sway in the direction of retribution instead of reward. Married

Given all that we've discussed, let's see how we can thwart the primary objective of the terrorist act. (Unfortunately, David was not able to offer a solution to this problem. The essay ends here.)

Thoughts on Lag Ba-Omer Probable timing: between age 35 to 40, i.e., between 1999-2004 Fires burning in and out. Pagan rituals replace holy light. Theft and dishonesty abound – no one cares. Current Practice On the thirty-third day of the Omer (Lag Ba-Omer) we are told to observe a modicum of happiness. We are happy because the students of Rabbi Akiva did not die on that day. There are even those that believe that some did die on that day. However, even they agree that the death ended on that day. What kind of happiness is this? Is the absence of death a reason to rejoice? Should it not more appropriately be a reason not to mourn? A number of customs have arisen for Lag Ba-Omer. Most of these are based on the two following historical traditions: • The first is the theory that Rabbi Akiva's students died, not by supernatural hand, but rather as a result of their participation in the Bar Kochbah rebellion. • It is widely believed that, on this day, Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai left his seclusion with his son. The memory of the Bar Kochbah rebellion led many to see this day as one appropriate for going out to the fields. Many even practice with bows and arrows to feel more a part of this tragically violent portion of our history. The memory of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai is more complicated. In addition to this being the day that he left his cave, this day is also considered Rabbi Shimon's "Yahrzeit". Tradition has it that Rabbi Shimon asked that the anniversary of his death not be used for mourning, but rather it should be a day of rejoicing. This rejoicing led to what is known as the "Hilulah D'Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai". For whatever reason, this party usually involves a bonfire and much singing. There are also those that claim that today's bonfires are to remind us of the signal fires lit during the Bar Kochbah rebellion. All this history is interesting. But what does it mean?

Some B ackground If, as appears to be the case, today's bonfires and field trips are to commemorate the Bar Kochbah rebellion and the memory of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai, why memorialize them in this w a y? What are we to learn by commemorating these events? Conversely, if we do not explore the meaning behind the fires and the field trips, do they have any value? While it may not answer all our questions, it may be interesting to take this opportunity to compare the two persons around which these customs revolve. Rabbi Akiva stands out in his tolerance of those around him. This is illustrated well in a story of how Rabbi Akiva survived a ship wreck. When asked how he swam all the way to shore, Married

Rabbi Akiva replied that every time a large wave approached, he bent down to let it pass. ."חביב האדם שנברא בצלם אלקים" ,This attitude towards others is expressed in his statement Rabbi Akiva traveled widely and had many students. While he stands out as the one who the world of Kabbalah) and returned unscathed, he is also one of the most) " פרדס" entered the authoritative of the Talmudic sages. In fact, where there is a difference of opinion between Rabbi Akiva and any one other Talmudic sage, we rule according to Rabbi Akiva. Let us now take a look at Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai. In many ways he appears to be the opposite of Rabbi Akiva. Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai is best known for his supposed authorship of the "Zohar". This is, of course, the best known Kabbalistic book. Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai (or "Rashbi") is also known for his strict judgment of those around him. The most famous story in this line describes his interpretation of the actions of those he first met upon leaving the cave. Rashbi had been living with only his son for 13 years. His experience was one of making do with a minimum of resources. The Rashbi was more a spiritualist than a man of the people. Where Rabbi Akiva traveled, Rashbi stayed in one place for 13 years. Where Rabbi Akiva had many students, Rashbi had few. Where Rabbi Akiva is best known for Halachic rulings, Rashbi is known for mysticism and reflection. What joins these two? Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai was a student of Rabbi Akiva and their approaches do not conflict – they complement each other. Actua ll y, Rabbi Akiva had two prominent students – perhaps the only two that he "ordained" – Rabbi Meir and Rashbi. While Rabbi Meir was a prominent Halachic authority, Rabbi Shimo n Bar Yochai focused more on spiritual topics. Together, these two men represented the best of their teacher, Rabbi Akiva.

The Message of Lag Ba-Omer How are we to commemorate the loss of Rabbi Akiva's students while at the same time celebrating perhaps his most famous one? The most obvious answer is that we should study the works of these great sages. We should strive to learn from them, and we should try our best to understand the common thread that bound these two very different people. Perhaps the message is in the disparate natures of Rabbi Akiva and Rashbi. Perhaps the message is that very different people can find very different ways to fulfill the potential that G-d has granted them. In these days of the Omer, we are supposed to be preparing ourselves for receiving the Torah. These seven weeks are to be used for self-improvement. It seems most fitting that in the middle of this period we take out time to commemorate two very great and very different people. Their message to us is that different approaches can be used to achieve greatness. Their combined message is that our efforts at self-improvement should not be frustrated by our failure to be the same as those we admire. To improve, we need to examine our own qualities and find how best to use them to achieve our own form of greatness. Do the bonfires help us? Do the bows and arrows remind us of our abilities and how to use them? Does the theft that characterizes preparations for Lag Ba-Omer properly commemorate the memory of two of our greatest Torah sages? Perhaps we need to rethink our customs for this day – each in our own way. Just a thought. Married

(חאפ) "A "Chop The word is Yiddish and means "an insight". Probable timing: between age 35 to 40, i.e., between 1999-2004. The title and words in quotes are as David wrote them. . Some enjoy staring at heavens and convince themselves that they see myriad forms up there. Horses, chariot, all manner of flora and fauna are imagined, where all I see are stars. In this week's portion "Va-Etchanan" we are specifically instructed not to "worship" the stars "ופן תשא עיניך השמימה וראית את .and sun. a particularly interesting verse is Chapter 4, Verse 19 השמש ואת הירח ואת הכוכבים כל צבא השמים ונדחת והשתחוית להם ועבדתם אשר חלק ה' אלקיך אתם לכל העמים תחת כל השמים." Basically, this "Pasuk" instructs us not to think that we can resort to worship mere stars and planets. The interesting part is the end of this Pasuk. It seems to indicate that these "Heavenly .for the other nations to worship (חלק) "Bodies" were "set aside "אשר חלק ", להאיר. ולפי עיקר הפשט .The Rashbam, in fact, seems to indicate this interpretation אשר הניח אותם לכל העמים לעובדם כי אינו חושש בהם ..." "להאיר. דבר אחר לאלהות, לא מנאן מלטעות :Rashi goes a little further. He explains as follows אחריהם, אלא החליקם בדברי הבליהם לטרדם מן העולם." Very strong words. He implies that Hashem set aside the sun, moon, and stars to lead the nations of the world astray. Could this really be the meaning? is also one "איסור עבודה זרה" The Torah Temima also points out another problem. It seems that of the Noachide laws. How is it possible that Hashem deliberately placed a stumbling block to adherence to the Noachide laws. A second note by the Torah Temima seems to shed some light on this issue. He quotes a Gemara in Megila 9B. There we have the story of Ptolmi the Greek king who commissioned the Septuagent). It is considered a miracle that all seventy sages chosen for) תרגום השבעים the the task of translation deliberately altered a small, but very significant, number of words in exactly the same way. is one of those altered verses. Without exception, they all (דברים פרק ד' פסוק י"ט) Our verse translated this verse as saying that Hashem set aside these bodies in the sky "to light the world". This helps explain why both the Rashbam and Rashi start their commentary of this " להאיר." verse with Most changes in the Septuagent were made to avoid angering the Greeks, and thus to avoid danger to Jews governed by them. It seemed that the seventy sages believed as Rashi did, that the sun, moon, and stars were given the job of leading the nations of the world astray. They changed the translation so that it would indicate a less offensive purpose. I would like to offer an alternative explanation. First, let us go to Gemara Shabbat (156B) ( ."There we find a discussion of how we know that the nation of Israel has no "Mazal .( קנ"ו: Not "luck" as it is normally translated, but here we are referring to a force whose purpose is to guide our future literally – a "symbol", a "star". The mazalot are often described as corresponding to the planets. Each nation is seen to have a .(להאיר להם) planet guiding its fate The example brought in the Gemara describes how Hashem showed Avraham the heavens and . . . Left unfinished Married

Communication (Mostly on Giving Oral Presentations) David wrote this (by hand, on paper in a notebook) during the years he was employed at BMC. Probable timing: between age 35 to 40, i.e., between 1999-2004. Apparently, these were rough notes on the subject, into which he was dumping ideas. He probably intended to prepare a larger talk or presentation on the subject (possibly, initially for the STC), or even write a book. This is evident from the bullets that indicate topics he intended to include and the wide variety of sub-topics. It is said that the power of speech sets us (human beings) apart from the other animals with which we share this earth. When most of us read this, we puff ourselves up and feel secure in our supremacy over "lower" creatures. We have vocabularies, grammar, and the written word, which we use to pass knowledge to future generations. Speech gives us the ability to join groups in which collaboration combines knowledge to invent and innovate. Whoa there! As with many aphorisms, the above statement holds only a partial truth. The power of speech is not unique to the human race. Many, if not most, animals make some sort of noise. These noises (and, in some cases, movements or electrical impulses) are used to communicate danger, direction or a desire to mate. The truth is that we really don't fully understand the communication capabilities of animals. What then sets us apart – the written or recorded word? Animals do that too! They leave trails and read them. They mark territory in various ways that are then interpreted by their peers and/or enemies. It seems that what truly sets us apart is more a question of degree. We are able to convey complex thoughts about abstract subjects. We are able to "paint a picture" with words. Properly assembled, language can create entire worlds or describe belief systems. The possibilities are virtually limitless. There is another side to this. When improperly used, language is even less effective than the squeaks, grunts, and catcalls that we normally associate with our furry cousins. Tragically, bad use of language lacks the straightforward practical nature of animal communication. Poorly assembled words are doubly disappointing because they do not realize their potential – the potential of all communication to be informative and thought provoking. King Solomon said in Proverbs, "Say little and do much." At first, this advice may appear to belittle the value of communication. In fact, it does the opposite. Say little admonishes us to choose our words wisely, and not to indiscriminately disperse them without clear purpose or direction. Chapters: • Child raising • In the home – spouses, children, setting a good example • In the school/college • Non-verbal communication (watching what we do) • Dating/social communication • Letters/email • Communication between generations o Ethical wills o History Married

o Classic Literature • In the workplace Public Speaking: • Don't allow dead air. • Preparation - Have everything ready beforehand. Don't go looking for things while your audience waits for you. • Have a logical flow, a path, not just an accumulation of facts. • Remember your audience! Be aware of how things look to them. Presentation: • Use slides. • Don't read displayed text. Your audience can do that. • Describe what you are doing when you demonstrate. Distractions to be avoided: • Annoying graphics • Noise • Typos Content: • Make sure your audience comes away with something that they didn't have before. • Don't preach to the converted. • Don't oversell yourself. • Don't state the obvious – it's boring. • Knowledge alone is not enough. • What does your listener want to know? That is what you should provide. • Know where you are going and make sure you get to the finish line. Don't get side- tracked. • Plan your time and watch the clock. • Include action items, such as: o References o Exercises o Advice – dos and don'ts Training: • Focus on problem solving. • Divide tasks according to job description • Define objectives Training:

Pieces One document we found on David's computer was titled "Pieces". It included the following three short pieces: Optimism and Pessimism, Perspective, and Wanting to be God. In addition, there were only headings that indicated his intention of expressing his thoughts and feelings about Bullies, Truth, Cigarettes, Years, Work, and Violence. Married

Optimism and Pessimism Optimists are doomed to experience unpleasant surprises. Pessimists are immune to this. Since they expect the worst, their surprises can only be happy ones. How's that for a black outlook on life?

Perspective I've always judged the rest of the world in relation to myself. It sounds sort of selfish, but I prefer to think of it as egocentric. Why shouldn't I be the center of my one universe? After all, all my perceptions are from my own perspective. By making myself the baseline by which my world is judged, I am able to easily categorize everything and everybody without memorizing actuarial tables, or squandering my time acquiring knowledge that will enable me to order my world according to statistical data. Anyone taller than me is tall. Anyone shorter than me is short. Anyone fatter than me is fat… I'm sure you see how this works. There is an added bonus to my unique perspective. It makes me what I've consciously or unconsciously strived for all my life. I am normal. I am more the center of my universe. I am the average, the mean. The very nature of my viewpoint obviates my skewing the charts. I am the charts. Perhaps normalcy is not a lofty goal. I realize that it almost sounds as if I'm saying that without my perspective, I may actually turn out to be subnormal. Perhaps that's true too. However, normalcy is more than average. It means that you fit in. Whatever your traits, they are acceptable because they are expected. Anyone whose traits are not compatible with mine becomes abnormal. I'm sounding like a god wannabe, aren't I?

Wanting to be God We all have an inner urge to be God. Not just any god, the one, the only. Him (or Her, if you prefer). It comes from a need to control our environment. We want to prevent the surprises. Don't get me wrong. I enjoy a pleasant surprise as well as the next Guy. It's just that the worry about the unpleasant ones creates far more tension than is healthy. My daydreams often place me in an omniscient role. I pretend that I have the power to do anything, to be anything, to change anything… I hope I'm not the only one. If I'm the only one, then either I'm not normal, or I'm the only normal person in a world of abnormal people. (I don't know which is worse.) Married

The Friends This is another document that we found on David's computer. I think was meant to be a book for children, in which animals are the most significant characters. Maybe someone who reads this will use David's beginning to write a book. A girl goes on a long trip around the world. She meets all sorts of interesting people. She makes friends that accompany her, and is sure to always write to her mother. Her friends have interesting and somewhat magical properties.

The Friends • Friend 1 – A cat who talks and knows all the best places when you need somewhere to nap. • Friend 2 – A parrot that appears in various places but does not actually accompany the girl in her travels. This parrot has all sorts of news about the world at large and is also a great messenger. • Friend 3 – A chinchilla that resides in the girl's pocket. This creature is very annoyed when people call it a mouse. Also, there are some interesting dynamics between it and the cat. • Friend 4 – A tortoise who can grow to enormous size so that our heroine can travel inside him. (Possible digression on the history/purpose of sea turtles? "Myth of motion and illusion of speed do not bind this ponderous steed.")

Chapter 1 A chinchilla is a rodent native to the Andes mountains. It is sought after for its fur, which is rich and soft. While this creature resembles a furry mouse, it should not be confused with one. In fact, chinchillas have been known to put up a great fuss when this distinction is not made. Curiously enough, those who hunt chinchillas to the brink of extinction share their prey's aversion to the name of "mouse". While honorable enough (with Disney's help), it just wouldn't carry the same prestige to market or wear a stole or coat made from the fur of a "mouse". I had never seen a chinchilla. I had no idea what they looked like. I was certainly not aware of their likes and dislikes. It was only a very unusual string of circumstances that changed all this. My parents have always loved their fellow animals. Sometimes I wonder if they feel the same way about other people. It seems that they are forever complaining about what people are doing. The subject that bothers me the most is that other people don't share their feelings about the animals with whom we share this earth. I don't know what it was that started them on this track, but for as long as I've known them (and that's a long time) my parents have been on a crusade to better the lot of our furry friends. Not just furry friends, scaly, slimy, slinky, and smelly ones too. Not to mention, hoofed, hairy, and humungous ones. Even though not all the benefactors of their work were furry, they (my parents) decided that they (furry ones) were the best to put on the posters. That's how our family founded the Folks for Furry Friends (the FFFF). We thought of adding Fat, Floppy, and Frumpy, but that seemed to be a bit too much, and not very complimentary to those that they we were trying to save. Every night, mom and dad would review their day. They'd discuss each thing they had done and determine if it was good for the FF (furry friends) or bad for them. Married

When they were finished with that, the FFFF (a.k.a. my parents) would plan out the next day. • Who are we going to save? • How are we going to do it? • Who's going to post bail for us? My parents didn't sleep much.

Chapter 2 This material is obviously an unfinished, rough dump of ideas, to be fleshed out later. I'VE GOT IT!!! Wow, I hadn't heard my father shout like that since . He had just gotten this idea that if people learned to love their little furry friend s , then they would be less likely to wear them (didn't work for the cows, but I guess that's because they taste so good). blablabla Our cat was inherited, so no one really knew how old she was. She's just always been there… blabla b la Something about the cat's reaction to the addition (the chinchilla). blablabla More about the care of a chinchilla … blablabla Trip to Galapagos to see the tortoises. Left alone. Learned something about these stately creatures. blablabla Decided to seek out xxx, the chinchilla's family … So begins our odyssey… Torah Learning, David's Book "The Laws of the Land"

Torah Learning, David's Book "The Laws of the Land" This is a rough outline of a book David planned to write about gardening in accordance with the Torah in Israel. Note that the angle brackets and the material between them are David's.

Book 1 Theory and Concepts When our forefathers entered the land of Israel, the land was divided among all those who came. No family was without a portion. While over time, land could be sold, (for example, to cover debts) the sale was only in effect until the next Jubilee year. After Yom Kippur of the Jubilee year all land was returned to its rightful owners and slaves3 were set free. It is interesting that this moment of ultimate freedom had to be accompanied by return of the land. This means that every slave who exited servitude had a piece of land to which to return, and hence a means of sustenance. It is important to stress this. Land in Temple times meant sustenance. Most of those living here then, owed their livelihood to the land that they tilled. Even those who earned the bulk of their income in other ways, typically supplemented it with produce grown in their own gardens or those of their neighbors. Given the importance of the land for physical sustenance, it is understandable that the Jewish agricultural laws were those that most affected the day-to-day life. Two important major purposes are served by the bulk of the agricultural laws. • They serve to remind us of God's dominion over the land and our gratitude to him for allowing us the use of it. • They are the foundation of a system of social welfare and "taxes". The agricultural laws are referred to as "Zeraim" (seeds) in rabbinic literature. They are typically grouped into the following categories: • Tithes (Trumot and Maasrot): Various taxes that are given to the Levites and to the Priests. • Portions that are given to the poor. • Produce forbidden for consumption. • Forbidden combinations of produce. • Food that must be eaten in special circumstances (usually in a state of "purity" in Jerusalem). With the return of Jews to the land of Israel, it has become necessary to review the "laws of the land" and to determine how they apply in our time. Several factors affect modern application of these laws.4 Most existing works on this topic approach it from a scholarly, research-oriented point of view. Most Halachic (Jewish legal) rulings have been focused on those who earn their living from the land. The result is that the average "man-on-the-street" may find it very difficult to understand what is required of him and how he should apply these laws in his own home garden.

3 This actually refers to Hebrew slaves. The status of the Hebrew slave in Jewish law is very different from the slaves of other nations. Very strict laws govern the way in which "owners" were required to treat their "slaves". Typically, Hebrew slaves were those who sold their services to pay a debt or to repay punitive damages required of them in a court of law (a Beit Din). 4 These factors will be described in detail in the first chapter of this book. Torah Learning, David's Book "The Laws of the Land"

The purpose of this book is to provide a working knowledge of the agricultural laws and how they affect you, along with a sprinkling of helpful and practical information. This book is divided into two main parts: • The first part contains an outline of the various agricultural laws and how they affect you. • The second part describes how these laws relate to specific produce and contains an alphabetic list of various fruits, vegetables, and herbs, and how the laws apply specifically to them. I will do my best to provide footnotes wherever possible, to point to Halachic sources for further study. It is my hope that this book will help introduce you to the world of mitzvoth that flourishes in your garden.

The Laws Today During Temple times, the agricultural laws applied in full. While these laws are eternal (as is every part of the Torah), they apply differently today, due to certain circumstances. Understanding these differences is essential to understanding how we must act today with regard to our own produce, and even with the produce that we find in the supermarket. The remainder of this chapter is devoted to descriptions of the various differences between the agricultural laws today and how they applied in Temple times. This chapter will deal only with the concepts. Specific application of these concepts will be described in the relevant chapters later in this book.

(כשעם ישראל שוכן בארצו) When the People of Israel Dwells in Its Own Land The Sefer Hachinuch lists various limitations on the application of various mitzvoth (commandments). Among these is the category of mitzvoth that only applies when the nation of Israel is settled in its own land. Most commentaries interpret this as referring to a situation in which the majority of the Jewish nation is living in the land of Israel. In addition, many laws only apply when the Beit Hamikdash (the Holy Temple) is standing. Since most Jews do not currently live in Israel, and the temple has not been rebuilt, the aforementioned laws do not have the status that they would "normally" have. However, many of these laws do, nevertheless, retain some significance as rabbinic ordinances. As such, while they are not normally as strict, they still affect us, and must be taken into account.

Taharah The question of spiritual purity also affects application of the agricultural laws. In Temple times, anyone who came into contact with, or close proximity to, a dead body was required to undergo a process of purification before he or she could properly handle items that were assigned a certain level of holiness.

Lineage (Yichus) The tithes normally given to the Levite and the Kohen can only be given or claimed by those who can prove that they are entitled to it. Today, very few of those that we can trace their lineage far enough back so that (כהנים) identify as Levites and priests they can claim their priestly gifts. Torah Learning, David's Book "The Laws of the Land"

Borders of the Land of Israel Editor's Note: This section was empty.

Bikurim – The First Fruits Each year we are required to set aside the first fruit of certain varieties and to bring that fruit to Jerusalem to present to the Kohanim. There is more to this mitzvah than at first meets the eye. Actually, this mitzvah involves a good number of activities that at first seem superfluous, or at best decorative.

Notes on Bikurim: Editor's Note: From the nature of the material in this section, I suspect, that he just collected information that he wanted to include under this heading. He probably planned to edit and flesh it out later. The formatting is mine. • Bikurim is the last portion in Zeraim. • Reason for Bikurim (see the Sefer Hachinuch) is that precisely at this time of celebration, we should recall the goodness of God and how all our celebration stems from his goodness. .and 34:26 23:19 שמות/and Exodus 1-12 ,26 דברים/Sources for Bikurim are Deuteronomy • • Only brought from the seven species (Mishnah 3 of Chapter 1). In addition, only the ideal member of each of the seven varieties can be brought as Bikurim. The ideal species are mentioned in the Mishnah. • No set amount is required, but the Jerusalem Talmud mentions a quantity of one sixtieth. .(as Terumah (Bamidbar 18:13 (קדושה) Bikurim have the same holiness • • Requires a basket, which is also normally given as a gift to the kohen. .(שירה) Should be accompanied by song • • Requires lifting (derived from the language of "Terumah". .(תוספת) Requires an addition • • Requires decoration (question of whether the decoration can be of other produce or not. .(וידוי) Requires confession • .(מקרא בכורים) "Additional mitzvah of the "Declaration of First Fruits • • Who brings Bikurim? There are those who bring Bikurim and recite the Declaration, those who do not bring Bikurim (and therefore do not recite the Declaration) and those who do not recite the Declaration. Those who do not bring Bikurim - Mishnahs 1 and 2, in Chapter 1 refer to an expression that determines whether or bringing Bikurim is required. The Torah says of As long as .(ראשית פרי אדמתך) "Bikurim that it must be "the first of the fruit of your land the land is not yours, the requirement to bring Bikurim does not apply. This includes grafted branches and branches that stem from the original vine – as long as they are attached. Included in this category are: Torah Learning, David's Book "The Laws of the Land"

o Anyone who takes a branch of a vine that starts in his land and roots it in his neighbor's field or in public property. o The reverse of the previous case, anyone who roots a branch of a vine in public property and roots it in his own land. o In the case of anyone whose private property is divided by public property, or by private property owned by someone else, and this person takes a branch from his property (e.g., on one side of the street) and buries it under the interim property (e.g., a public thoroughfare) so that the opposite end of the branch surfaces in his property on the other side of the interim property, this too is a case where he cannot bring Bikurim, because he is benefiting from property that is not his and this fruit reflects that.5 o Mishnah 2 of Chapter 1 includes sharecroppers, those who rent land and those whose land is stolen among those who do not bring Bikurim on the grounds that it is not their land. Those who bring Bikurim but do not recite the Declaration - Mishnah 4 includes the following in this group: o A convert, because he cannot say the verse that is part of the Declaration "… who referring to the ,אשר נשבע לאבותינו לתת לנו) swore to our forefathers to give to us land of Israel). His ancestors were not among those to whom the land was promised, so he has no ancestral claim to the land. The Mishnah says, however, that if the convert's mother was a non-Jewish Israelite, he could recite the Declaration. However, the Gemara (Baba Bathra 82:2) implies that this could only occur in the case of a descendant of the Keni (descendant's of Jethro) who were given land in the area of Jericho, and could hence claim an ancestral right to that land. o Anyone who is bringing bikurim for someone else (Mishnah 5, Chapter 1), such as the guardian of orphans who is bringing bikurim from land that belongs to his charges, an appointed representative or a Canaanite slave. (אשר נתתה לי ה') "o A woman, because she cannot say "…which God gave me because the land was divided among the men of each household. 6 o One whose sexuality is questionable (due to physical ambiguity) is assigned the same status as a woman regarding the bringing of Bikurim. 7 • Timing of Bikurim o Bikurim cannot be brought before Shavuot (Pentecost) because the Torah says "...the feast of the harvest, the first fruits of thy labors…" (23:16 שמות/Exodus) .This is brought by Mishnah 3, Chapter 1 . וחג הקציר בקורי מעשי() o Another restriction on when Bikurim can be brought is caused by the different times at which different fruits become ready. (Q. Can one bring Bikurim from the previous year, e.g., wine or oil.)

5 Rabbi Yehuda differs and says that, provided that the interim property is public and not privately owned by someone else, he can still bring Bikurim but not say the Declaration. 6 The daughters of Tzlafchad did receive land as do any daughters where there are no other valid heirs. However, they received the land as an inheritance and not as part of the normal division of the land (according to Kahati who quotes the Tosefot Yomtov). 7 Torah Learning, David's Book "The Laws of the Land"

o One who brings Bikurim between Shavuot and Succot (inclusive) recites the Declaration. If he brings Bikurim between Succot and Chanukah, he does not 26:11 דברים/recite the Declaration. This is learned from the text in Deuteronomy (ושמחת בכל הטוב) "… where it says "…and thou shalt rejoice in every good thing and the primary rejoicing in the harvest is between Shavuot and Succot.(Mishnah 6, Chapter 1) o Another reason Bikurim should not be brought after Chanukah is the verse in that says "…and thou shalt take of the first of all the fruit 26:2 דברים/Deuteronomy ולקחת מראשית כל פרי האדמה אשר ) "…of the earth, which thou shalt bring of thy land This implies that you can bring Bikurim as long as it can be found in .(תביא מארצך the fields. However, after Chanukah, there is no longer fruit in the fields. (Mishnah 6, Chapter 1) • Ownership of the land is necessary for bringing Bikurim o If someone buys three trees in someone else's field, it is assumed that he also purchased the land on which they stand. In this case, he brings Bikurim and recites the Declaration.8 o It the land dries up or a tree is cut down after the fruits were set aside for Bikurim, the fruit is brought without a Declaration, because the owner is considered as not having land.9 The reason he does not recite the declaration may also be because of the requirement to rejoice, and such an owner would not be able to rejoice.10 o If someone sets aside first fruits and then sells his field, he brings them but does not recite the Declaration because he no longer has land. However, this is only if he knew when he set the fruit aside that he planned to sell the field. If he did not know, he must let the fruit rot because the status of the fruit changed. Previously, it could have been brought with a Declaration. Now it cannot.11 o If the previous owner already brought Bikurim of the same species from that field and did not recite the Declaration, the new owner does not bring Bikurim. However if the new owner has another species to bring from that field, he can bring it and recite the Declaration.12 The Mishnah lists ten requirements for the mitzvah of the first fruit. Editor's Note: David left a large space here, probably for more material.

"Matanot Kehuna" (Tithes) Our sages determined that when we partake of any pleasure in this world, we are required to recite a blessing. This type of blessing is intended to remind us that nothing on this earth is actually ours. We can only use something in our physical possession when we first acknowledge God's sovereignty over the entire world. We must acknowledge that the items

8 If he only purchased two trees, there is a difference of opinion as to whether or not he also purchased the land. Rabbi Meir claims that two trees is enough to have purchased the land. The law is not according to Rabbi Meir. 9 Rabbi Yehuda maintains that the Declaration should be recited. The law does not follow Rabbi Yehuda. 10 What if the land dries up or the tree is cut down, but the person has other land and/or trees of the same type? Can that person then bring Bikurim that had been set aside from the now dried up land or cut down tree and, if so, does he recite the Declaration?> 11 Rambam does not agree. He maintains that the fruit should still be brought without a Declaration. 12 Some say that if the previous owner did recite the Declaration, then the new owner should not bring at all. Torah Learning, David's Book "The Laws of the Land" in our possession are only there by "the grace of God". Partaking of some worldly pleasure without reciting such a blessing is described as "theft". The idea behind this would seem to imply that nothing is to be truly ours until we first acknowledge that it is, in fact, not ours at all. In a world that judges us by what we possess, this acknowledgement promotes a certain special type of humility. When physical sustenance is derived from this world, we are similarly required to perform actions that remind us of the source of that sustenance.

Benefits for the Poor Editor's Note: This section was empty.

Forbidden Fruits Editor's Note: This section was empty.

Forbidden Combinations Editor's Note: This section was empty.

Book 2 Practical Application

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Technical Communicator It is natural that a number of the things that David wrote focused on issues that arose as a result of the profession in which he invested so much time and energy. Even though, at first glance, they seem to be relevant to only the technical writing profession, I believe they are also good examples of David's ability to organize and present his ideas. Also, because I have already included so much of David's material in unfinished and unpolished form, I believe it is especially important to include two professional presentations that he delivered to his colleagues at Society for Technical Communication (STC) events, at the end of this section (because of their length).

Dos and Don'ts for Installation Documentation The following incomplete material is probably a preliminary dump of his thoughts on the subject. I imagine that he used it initially to clarify the subject for himself or others on his team at work. Typically, once he felt it was ready, he might have used it as the basis of a talk or a document for others.

Do:

Use dynamic links for numbering systems. • Clearly indicate the flow using signposts, such as numbers and flow diagrams. • If you must jump, jump forward only. • Put information where the user needs it. • Repeat if necessary. • Include planning as numbered steps. • Tell the user what to do (instead of, about something). • Hold the user's hand. • Tell them how to check the prerequisites. • Break into multiple paths, if necessary. • Do QA (quality assurance) on your documentation by following the flow, step by step. • Make sure that anyone doing QA on the product uses the documentation to install. • Avoid conditional statements. Make them into steps that may be skipped. • Review installation script messages (inserted by the development team) as early as possible so you can suggest changes as necessary. • Be consistent. Always say the same thing in the same way. For example, in the sentence "the following prompt is displayed", do not substitute other words in place of the word prompt when the meaning is the same. (The same is true for other terms, like: question, information, menu and screen.)

Don't: • Don't assume: - That the user has a high level of technical knowledge. - That the user will return after jumping to another location. - That the developers know how the user thinks. Technical Communicator

• Don't confuse the user: - By breaking the procedure into pieces. - By adding excessive textual explanations. - By offering multiple ways to do something. - By including too many jumps. - By making "Uninstall" the last step. • Don't put information where it will not be found. For example, don't put fixes in a separate document or at the end of the document. • Don't assume that the developer (your source of information) knows how the user (your target group) thinks. • Don't write backward sentences in which the purpose of performing an action precedes the directive to perform the action. Make direct statements. For example, "Do x by doing y." is an indirect statement. Instead, write "Do the following to do x."

Steps: • Use names that are readily understood. • Do not allow one minor step to take more than approximately half a page. There should be at least two steps per page. • Each step should have only one action. If there are two actions, there should be two steps.

Lean and Mean Documentation/Saying It with Less (David's title) In April 2002, David presented a talk on documentation at an event sponsored by the Israel chapter of the Society for Technical Communication (STC). I started with the review of David's presentation by a colleague of his, Debbie Shapiro. I edited it, based on his original slides and notes. The result below does not show the actual slides he used, but it does include all the points he covered, in his own words.

Lean e r and Meaner (Debb i e's title) The April STC Israel events included a presentation by David Wolicki. I totally enjoyed his fast pa c ed and interesting talk, laced with humor and lots of old fashioned good advice. I am sitting here with my notes, trying to figure out how best to share them with you. I hope you don't mind if I do this in a somewhat outline fashion. (Debbie inserted the following summary at the end.) In summary, I learned a lot from this presentation. I also realized how important it is to get feedba c k from end-users. Without this information, it is impossible to make the judgment calls required to make documentation more effective.

How Did We Get Where We Are? Feature Glut has let to Info Glut, resulting in bigger (and not necessarily better) manuals. This despite the fact that 80% of the people use 20% of the features 80% of the time! Why such large documents: • Squeaky wheels - someone complained about an obscure feature – so it got documented (for only one person!) Technical Communicator

• Overlap - over specialized documents and redundant information for special users • Unnecessary details • Old information

Today's Situation Today , hi-tech industries are facing new challenges. • Feature rich products are losing contracts to products that are fast and easy. • Big products are "dumbing down" (hiding features behind an Advanced button). • New buzzwords are leading the way. o Plug and Play o First-day experience o Out-of-box design o User-centered design, usability, ease of use … • Economic down-turn o Slimmer staff means less people to write and review o Same crazy deadlines

The Challenge Too much information: • Makes it harder to find what you need. • Forces the user to filter out whatever he or she considers irrelevant. • Is harder to maintain. • Takes longer to write.

The Solutions In the face of all the challenges, we need to question what really needs to be included in our documents. Stage 1. Start Big – Look at the books, before looking at their contents • Does each book have a specific purpose? • Is there redundancy – does their content overlap? • Does the user know where to look? • Which books does the user really need? Stage 2. Make a Plan • Identify objectives (key concepts, not how much). • Break it down into manageable chunks. Remove unnecessary information, consolidate books, and rearrange chapters. • Schedule chunks to match release dates, and get commitments from reviewers. Technical Communicator

Stage 3 . Implement • For each chunk, edit for economy. o Question additions. o Keep language simple. o Remove obsolete issues. • Review the logic and revise to achieve simpler and clearer organization. Stage 4 . Look Again! • Can you remove any more? • Did you meet your objectives? • Get feedback from the field?

Concrete Suggestions • Delete theory that does not translate into action • Slash material that does not require user intervention or that is intuitive • Delete lengthy descriptions of what the product is. Keep only what describes how to use it. • Convert headings followed by brief text to a table. • Delete unnecessary headings. • Rename descriptions of material that is not of interest to the user.

The Result • Less material to review means better reviews, faster turnaround and met deadlines. • The customer is introduced to the whole product. • Documentation matches marketing directions. • Usually, usability problems can be detected and fixed.

Overcoming Internal Resistance to Change When you try to improve your documentation you may run into resistance. Deadlines may also limit how much change you can implement in each release. You need to get the co-operation and backing of your reviewers, support staff, and users. Also, e mphasize that increased usability means less customer complaints and reduced mainte n ance costs. Technical Communicator

Planning a Documentation Project On February 6, 2003, David presented a talk on planning a documentation project at a convention for technical writers sponsored by the Israel chapter of the Society for Technical Communication (STC). I was at his session. It was well attended. He spoke well and with humor. I was very proud of him. It is a perfect example of how far David had come. I include the slides that he used for the presentation first, and then the three page outline that he handed out (at the end). Although the material is expressed in terms of a documentation project, much of it is applicable to other project types as well.

The Slides

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The Handout

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The End On Thursday; June 3, 2004, David was working at home, as he did every Thursday. At one point, late in the morning, he walked into his work room (where he did much of his carpentry) to take a break. Suddenly, he fell. He called to Aliza, who was upstairs with Chaya. He could not move his limbs on one side. Aliza thought he had had a stroke. She called us from the hospital. By the time we met them at the hospital, David had been sedated. We stayed with him until The bleeding in his .(ט"ז סיון תשס"ד ,the end, at 9:45 a.m. Shabbat morning (June 5, 2004 brain had occurred in a location that could not be reached, and was so severe that he could not recover on his own. The funeral was scheduled for Sunday, late afternoon, to enable his brother Eliav to arrive from New York. It was held in the shul in which he davened in Ginot Shomron, and for which he had created the windows described elsewhere in this book. Over one thousand people attended. One said, "The enormous crowd at the funeral was indicative of the high esteem in which he was held by so many." Speakers at the funeral were his father, his brothers (Zvi, Eliav, Benjie, and Pesach), Rav Oron and Rav Halevi. The rest of this section contains his brothers' eulogies, followed by other words that were written about David after his death.

Zvi's Words Zvi spoke in Hebrew. I asked him to also translate it into English. The English translation follows the Hebrew.

Hebrew דייויד ואני, האחים הגדולים, כקטנים היינו שובבים כמו כל זוג של ילדים קטנים, חקרנו יחד הסתבכנו יחד ורבנו לא מעט אבל מעבר לכל ידענו שאפשר לסמוך אחד על השני . ביום שישי ישבתי עם פסח להסתכל על תמונות ישנות וראיתי תמונה אחרי תמונה שלנו כקטנים תמימים . היינו שותפים לחדר מספר שנים עד שפקוח נפש חייב שנישן בחדרים נפרדים . דייויד היה שונה ממני הוא היה אומן, (שחקן , צייר , יוצר , חוקר ) בעוד שאני הייתי המעשי והדואג . הוא היה ביישן ומופנם ואני הייתי רעשני ופזיז. הוא היה בעל כישרון למדעים ואני הצלחתי בהיסטוריה ושפה. היה נדמה שאנו מפקירים כל אחד תחומים אחרים לזולת. רק כאשר סיימנו תיכון ופנינו לכיוונים שונים , אני לישיבה והוא לאוניברסיטה התחלנו לגלוש כל אחד לתחומו של השני דייויד נהיה חסכן יותר ושמרן ואני השתחררתי והתחלתי לחשוב יותר לעומק. עם השנים למרות השוני בינינו הפכנו להיות דומים עוד יותר בעניין הנגרות, אצלי בניית רהיטים שימושיים וכדרך לחסוך כסף, והוא כדי ליצור דברים ייחודיים ויפים וגם רהיטים. כאשר דייויד התעניין בנושא הוא היה לומד אותו לעומק ולאחר מכן היה דואג להרצות לכל מי שהיה מעונין לשמוע על תחום ההתענינות החדש . כך למדנו על הפסיכולוגיה של חולי איידס , קצבות , גידול פירות , כתיבה טכנית וכמובן מצוות התלויות בארץ (עוד הדוגמאות רבות). אני החזרתי לו עם הרצאות על יין , מזון קפוא, גניאלוגיה וכמובן פוליטיקה. אני לא בטוח ששמענו אחד את השני אבל אהבנו לטרטר את הזולת עם נאומים ארוכים. מבין כל התחומים שלמד דייויד , לימוד ההלכות של ארץ ישראל בלט ולאחר שעברנו לגור בביתינו והיו לי שאלות לגבי ערלה, מעשרות, כלאים ועוד, ידעתי שהתשובות אצלו. כמובן שכל עשב שהצלחתי להרוג הוא היה לוקח הביתה והופך לשיח שלם. The End

למרות שכל אחד מאיתנו הכיר ביכולתו של השני לא הרבנו במחמאות הדדיות ועכשיו אינני בטוח עם הדגשתי לו מספיק כמה נהניתי לשמעו כשהוא היה מתפלל בציבור . או כמה התפעלתי מציוריו או יצירותיו. היינו מדברים רבות על "אחינו הקטנים " מנתחים את אשר הם עושים ומחליטים איך לייעץ להם גם אם הם אינם מעונינים בעצתנו. לרוב התעלמו מאיתנו ולהפתעתנו הענינים תמיד הסתדרו. דייויד אהבתך לעליזה ולבנותך לא ידעה גבולות כמה היית מאושר לאחר הלידות והסבל שעברתם. כל המשפחה שמחה איתכם ואנו ממשיכים להיות גאים בהן . אני מתחייב בשם האחים שנעשה כל מאמץ למלאות את החסר ולדאוג להם כמו לילדינו. הפסוק לשם דוד הוא "דרשו ה' ועוזו בקשו פניו תמיד". אני חושב שפסוק זה משקף את האדם שנהיית ואת החיים שחיית. בדיבורים בינינו, לינדה ואני תמיד אמרנו שאם חס וחלילה יקרה לנו משהו היינו רוצים שאתם תגדלו את ילדינו . להפתעתי נודע לי אתמול שגם לפסח וקייט היתה אותה מחשבה. אני רואה בזה עדות לאדם שהפכת להיות ולמידת האמת שבך . אני אהבתי אותך יותר ממה שאמרתי ותחסר לי יותר ממה אני קולט היום. אני מבקש ממך סליחה ומחילה על כל ריב שהיה בינינו לאורך שנות חיינו והייה בטוח שמזמן מחלתי לך. דייויד קח את קולך הערב השמיימה ותהיה מליץ יושר לעליזה , לבנות , ולכל המשפחה . תלך בשלום ותנוח על משכבך בשלום ותעמוד לגורלך לקץ הימין.

English David and I, the two older brothers. As small children, we were as naughty as children can be. We experimented together, got in trouble together, and fought often. However, through it all, we knew that we could count on one another. On Friday, Pesach and I sat looking at old pictures and I saw picture after picture of two young and innocent children. For many years we shared the same bedroom, until "Pikuach Nefesh" (the commandment to preserve life) mandated that we sleep in different rooms. David was different from me. He was an artist (actor, painter, researcher), while I was always pragmatic and concerned. He was shy and introverted, while I was loud and impulsive. He had a talent for the sciences, while my strengths were in languages and History. It was almost as if we had each abandoned certain fields to the other. It was only after completing high school and we had each gone our own way, me to Yeshiva and he to university, that we each began to encroach on the other's territory. David became more conservative and realistic. I loosened up and began to think deeper. As the years went by, in spite of our differences, we emerged with extreme similarities. Carpentry for me was a means to build cheap furniture, while for David it was the opportunity to create beautiful and unique items, as well as furniture. When David developed an interest in a subject, he studied it carefully, and then lectured to anyone willing to listen about his new passion. And so we all heard about the psychology of AIDS patients, butchery, raising fruit, technical writing, and of course, the laws pertaining to the land of Israel. I, in turn, responded with lectures on wine, frozen food, genealogy and of course politics. I am not even sure that we always heard each other, however, we did enjoy watching the other suffer throughout the long lectures. Of all the subject areas that David studied, the laws pertaining to agriculture in Israel stood out. After we moved into our new home, and we had questions regarding "Orlah" (new trees less than three years old), Ma'asrot (tithing), Cla'im (hybrid planting), and more, I knew that he would have the answers. Of course, any plant I succeeded in killing he would take home where it would thrive. The End

In spite of our respecting each other's abilities, we did not overdo the mutual complements, and now I am sure I never told him how much I enjoyed listening to him daven, or even how inspired I was by his pictures and other art. We would go on and on about our "younger brothers", dissecting what each of them was doing with his life and how to advise them, all the while knowing that no one was interested in our counsel, nor would they listen. To our great surprise most things turned out well anyway. David, your love for Aliza and your daughters was unlimited. You experienced such joy after their births, and suffered such difficulties in having them. The entire family rejoiced along with you, and we continue to be proud of them. I undertake, in the name of all our brothers, to do all we can to fill the gap and treat them as our own. The "posuk" for the name David is "Dirshu hashem veuzo bakshu panav tamid" (seek G-d and his strength, always looking to his face). This "posuk" exemplifies the man you became and the life you lead. In our conversations, Linda and I have occasionally said that if, G-d forbid, something should happen to us, we would have wanted you to raise our children. To my great surprise, Pesach told me that he and Kate have shared the same thoughts. I see this as testimony to the man you became and to your search for truth. I loved you more than I ever told you, and will miss you more than I can even imagine today. Please forgive me for all the fights between us throughout our lives and rest assured that you have my complete absolution. David, take your beautiful voice heavenward and use it to speak for Aliza, the girls, and the entire family. Go in peace, rest in peace, and enjoy the reward you have earned.

Eliav's Words

At the Funeral Eliav flew in from New York and arrived, just in time for the funeral. His speech was not originally written. The following is what he wrote down from memory for this book, two years later. In thinking about David, the first thing that comes to mind is shock, or disbelief. I spoke with him a couple of weeks ago. He'd called me in order to wish me a happy birthday. We got into a conversation about our personal artwork. This wasn't one of the topics we generally discussed, for the most part, because I didn't view what I did as art, but rather just artistic presentation of food. David said that I either had to take much better pictures of the food, or start to make something (artistic) that won't spoil. I brushed him off, as usual. I need to say, "I'm sorry". Standing where I am today, looking at these beautiful windows, some of which I've never seen, and others only in pictures – pictures that don't come close to doing them justice – I can't help but think about how worried I was when we thought he'd had a stroke; that having lost function of his left side (David being a lefty), how frustrated he would be and how much future artwork would be missed. In fact, that was what I told the various minyanim when I asked them to make a misheberach for him. They also said extra Tehilim at two of them, without my requesting it. When I got home from shul on Motzei Shabbat, Bernice (my wife) met me at the door, crying, and told me in utter disbelief that David was gone, and that it hadn't been a stroke after all; that I had to leave immediately in order to get to the airport to come here. My gaze shifted to the wall of our den where our Ketuba, made by David, hangs. Underneath, right by The End

the edge of the couch, were two boxes. It was David's most recent order of woodworking tools and books that had been delivered a few days earlier. These were specialized items that David begrudgingly (because of his rule to buy only Israeli merchandise, whenever possible) ordered so that he could continue to create things of beauty. It generated – as does everything my family members order – junk mail. The difference is that I use the junk mail generated by David's orders. It is responsible for my current employment, and more. "David!" I will miss you greatly for your letters, phone calls, art and even your junk mail. I'm sorry I brushed away your advice while you were alive. I will try to change that in the future.

A Month Later Eliav inserted the following in the newsletter of his synagogue for the week of July 2, 2004. לזכר נשמת דוד דניאל ב"ר יוסף ברוך זצ"ל (In memory of David Daniel the son of Yosef Baruch, of blessed memory) It is impossible for me to fully describe all of the aspects of my brother – David Daniel Wolicki z"l (abbreviation for "of blessed memory"). I will, however, do my best. He was an accomplished artist in many media, a true Torah scholar and a tremendous gomel chesed (doer of good deeds). David did not waste time. He filled every minute with something productive and never did anything without proper research into the best procedures to follow. He believed that you did not own a book unless you'd read it, and every book in his house had been read or had a bookmark in it somewhere. David was more than a "Jack of all trades". He was a master of them. He was at the top of his field professionally and his hobbies were at the top of other people's professions. David left behind a vast legacy, as well as a large hole to fill. The residents of his community will see aspects of him every day in the things he made for the community and in his wife Aliza and their two daughters, Miriam – 6 and Chaya – 15 months. The funeral was close to a month ago and I have a feeling that, although David is at peace, I doubt he's at rest. He's probably researching design and construction procedures for the third Beis Hamikdash (Temple). May he assist Hashem (God) to finish it that much faster in our time. In loving memory, Eliav Wolicki

Benjie's Words David was an artist. Anyone who knew him can attest to that. In everything he did, he was an artist. I mean that he was a perfectionist who put all of himself into everything he did. Any time he did anything, you knew it would get done to the best of his ability. He wasn't always satisfied, but it was usually far beyond the imagination of the rest of us, never mind the ability. He worked in many media. I'm not just referring to woodwork, painting and glass. I'm referring to everything he did. I'm referring to his gardening; he took so much pride in successfully planting things and getting fruit from them. I'm referring to his singing in the shul choir in Montreal (when he was in his teens and the average age of the other choir members was over 50). He also created his own harmonies to Zemirot Shabbat. I'm referring to his acting. I'm referring to his work expanding his house. I'm referring to the cupboard he made for his tools. His workmanship was (I should say is, because his workmanship lives on) beyond compare. The End

Wolicki family) sign for our house in Ma'a lot that is an) "משפחת ווליצקי" He made a absolute work of art; I see it every time I go into my house. He did it as a first job, experimenting with a new tool that he bought. Everyone who sees it asks me where I got it "כתובה" because they would like to order one. Sadly, it will now remain one-of-a-kind. The (Marriage Contract) that is hanging on my bedroom wall is the first one he ever made. He has since made many more, so he remains a part of many people's lives.

Original size: 44 x 34 cm (17 3/8" x 13 3/8") Original size: 71 x 51 cm (28" x 20") Amazingly, most of these things he did so well, he did without any formal training. He just read voraciously, and was instinctively able to convert his book knowledge, and apply it practically. He was a firm believer in that old saw about a book only really being yours if you've read it. How many of us have libraries of books that we've never read. When David bought a book, it was with the full intention of reading it, cover-to-cover. (He was an artist even when it came to reading.) I didn't always appreciate David's enthusiasm and artistry about everything he did. When I was younger, I saw it as competition or one-upmanship. I didn't realize that this was just David's way. When I got a tropical fish aquarium (a small five gallon tank, with swordtails and mollies), David became interested and went out and bought a 40 gallon tank, with state of the art equipment and beautiful fish (like gouramis and cichlids). We both collected stamps, but I was very jealous of his humongous two-volume stamp album that I was sure had a place for every stamp in the world. I didn't realize that this was just the way David was. When he did something, he did it all the way, with no compromising. In recent years, I've found myself calling David for advice because he is such a wealth of information on just about any subject. We've all heard of know-it-alls (usually meant sarcastically as people who think they know everything). David actually was a know-it-all; he had sound, practical, useful information on just about any subject. I would call with a few the laws of tithing that apply) "הלכות תרומות ומעשרות" short questions about gardening or only in the land of Israel) (David was probably one of the top unacknowledged experts on the practical application of these laws.), or carpentry, and I would usually find myself listening to all sorts of information on various other subjects for about three quarters of an hour. This was The End

simply because he had so much to share on so many subjects. Once again, he gave it his all. I only wish I had listened more and called him more often, because now I can't do that anymore. Among my brothers, I am the only one who had the unique opportunity to relate to David as a colleague as well. I had the opportunity to hear him give a lecture at a professional convention. Once again, he performed with artistry. I can't really do justice to the experience by describing it. All I can say is, sitting anonym ously in the crowd and hearing people praise him made me proud to be his brother. I was trained as a technical writer; he wasn't. It just sort of fell into his lap, yet he surpassed me in many ways. He was admired and respected by his colleagues and co-workers and will be sorely missed by them all. David leaves us with many physical reminders; just look around you at his works of art here in the shul. I just hope that the physical reminders can act as spiritual reminders and help me remember to give as much of myself to everything I do, in the same way that he did.

Pesach's Words The Gemara (Talmud) in Shabbat (31a) states the following six questions that one is asked after death when ascending to the heavenly court for judgment: Rava said: when a man is brought in for judgment, he is asked, "Did you deal in business faithfully? Did you set times for Torah study? Did you involve yourself in procreation? Did you anticipate the redemption? Did you delve into learning with wisdom? Did you understand one thing from another?" The Gemara is telling us that it is these matters that are the gauge of success or failure in life. David will not just be able to answer yes to these questions; he will pass the test with flying colors. Interestingly, the Gemara derives each of these six questions from a different word in the ".והיה אמונת עתיך חסן ישעת חכמת ודעת..." ,(ישעיה ל"ג ו') verse in Isaiah 33:6 אמונת The first question, "Did you deal in business faithfully?" corresponds to the word (integrity/faithfulness). David was a person who not only always spoke the truth. He was absolutely intolerant of dishonesty of any kind. It upset him. He took pride in his honesty, dependability, and trustworthiness. He was honest in the extreme. The Gemara also associates each of these same six words with one of the six "Sedarim" of corresponds to the Seder of Zeraim (Plantings). This was a subject אמונת Mishna. The word David loved and in which he developed expertise. I remember one time while I was in kollel, and my chavruta and I hit a sugya that referenced a source having to do with agricultural halacha. We didn't really understand the situation being described or the ruling. I called David at work and asked him. He answered my question, and proceeded to explain a dispute among the Rishonim that related to the particular situation. He didn't just love the Torah of Zeraim. He loved the practice of it as well. Recently, my entire building enjoyed an abundance of lemons from David's garden. עתיך ,The second question, "Did you set times for Torah?" corresponds to the second word (times). David was meticulous in setting times for Torah study. He was a man of "projects". He would take on a project to learn a particular sefer or a particular topic, and go about it methodically and effectively. He finished many books this way. He understood that a real acquisition of Torah is accomplished in this slow and steady fashion. There are no get rich quick schemes. He did not waste his time. He always had a book of Mishnayot in his pocket. The End

with Seder Moed (appointed times, i.e., holidays). For עתיך The Gemara associates the word David, Moadim were a time for more learning. The third question, "Did you involve yourself in procreation?" corresponds to the third word, treasure house) and the Gemara also associates this same word with Seder Nashim) חסן (Women). David and Aliza were involved to the point of mesirut nefesh in fulfilling the mitzvah of peru vrevu (procreation) – mesirut nefesh emotionally, physically and financially. Aliza was his treasure and the girls were their fulfillment of the mitzvah of peru vrevu. I remember when Aliza was pregnant with Miriam. The whole family was together in Netanya and the men were walking to shul. David was telling us how Aliza sent him out late at night recently to get her ice cream. We were laughing about pregnant women and their cravings. As he was describing the late night runaround, trying to find ice cream, one of us said to David, "She's putting you through hell." David turned serious for a moment and said, "This is not hell. Hell is what we went through all those years." ישעת ,Question four "Did you anticipate the redemption?" corresponds to the fourth word (Salvations). David loved Eretz Yisrael in a way that was an example to everyone who knew him. He always defended Eretz Yisrael. This weeks Parsha, Shelach, contains the words " .the land is very, very good), words that David believed strongly) "טובה הארץ מ מא דאד I remember once buying imported jam and getting chastised by David for not buying Israeli jam. He viewed my choice as a slap in the face to the produce of Eretz Yisrael. He felt genuine pain in my being in chutz la'aretz and was always on the lookout for any indication that I was becoming too galus oriented. His genuine joy in greeting us at the airport reflected these feelings as well. David genuinely yearned for redemption every day, and all his choices showed this. a reference to the sacrifices in the Temple), also suggests the fifth) קדשים ,The fifth word question, "Did you delve into learning with wisdom?" David enjoyed the works of Machon HaMikdash, and studied them avidly in the hopes of getting a glimpse into how the world is supposed to be. the sixth word corresponds to the question, "Did you understand one thing from ודעת another?" David was always full of pilpulim and chidushim based on the Torah he learned. Sometimes he could drive you crazy. He had an awesome and powerful mind. He brought the full force of his creativity to the way that he though about everything. The End

Bnei Akiva Mechitzah in Ginot Shomron "חדש בג"ש"This was first inserted by Zvi Fine in the Bnei Akiva publication in Hebrew, the week following David's funeral. An English translation of the same article appeared in the Rosh Hashanah magazine of The New Synagogue of Netanya the sane year. I include the Hebrew text after the English, with pictures of the mechitzah at the end.

English This week David Wolicki, of blessed memory (z"l), passed on to the world to come. Chazal (our sages) teach us in the writings of Masechet (Tractate) Sanhedrin, that every Jew constitutes a "complete world". I would like to take this opportunity to allow the readers to share in a short story about David (z"l) that may provide some insight into his unique personality. When we were designing the Beit Midrash (study hall/synagogue) of the local chapter of Bnei Akiva, one of the main problems we found was the design and subsequent construction of a Mechitzah (room divider for prayers) that would fulfill our needs. We wanted a Michitzah that would allow us to utilize the maximum amount of space in the hall. It had to be strong, but also portable. We were looking for a carpenter that could design, as well as build, the Mechitzah in a manner that would most completely suit these requirements. One of our chapter members suggested we ask David if he might be able to help. I remember asking that same member in bewilderment, "What does David have to do with carpentry? Doesn't he work with computers?" The answer I received was, "Yes! You're right. He does work with computers, and he's also a carpenter, a sketch artist, a sculptor, a gardener, etc… He's actually a Jack of all trades." I was very hesitant to approach him. After all, it's kind of unfair and presumptuous to ask someone for whom carpentry is just a hobby, and not a profession, to design and then build a Mechitzah for a Beit Midrash. It's not exactly a small undertaking. David, however, never even had to think about whether or not to build it. He was just afraid that he wouldn't finish it on time, due to all of his other pursuits. Wanting to make it as easy on him as possible, I called him up and tried to explain the required dimensions of the Mechitzah over the phone. David insisted on going down (a steep hill) to check out the location for himself so that he could determine the optimum placement and construction of the Mechitzah. That same day we met at the Beit Midrash. David showed up with his measuring tools and began to measure lengthwise and widthwise. Then he began figuring out the total area. Feeling bad about putting him to all this trouble, I tried to explain that all we wanted was a simple Mechitzah that would go across the room from one wall to the other. Smiling, David explained why that kind of Mechitzah would not optimize the use of the available space. The Mechitzah would have to be more complex than that. Upon finishing with the measurements, David promised to consider all of the options, and that after researching various types of wood, he would begin the work. On our way back out of the hall, I tried to discuss his fee for the construction. "Forget about it!" he said. "First let me get started building it. When I've finished, we'll discuss it." The money simply didn't matter to him. About a month or so later, he called me and happily informed me that he'd finished building the Mechitzah. He invited me over to his house to inspect the finished product. As this was a Friday, I figured that I'd stop by, take a quick look, and hurry back home. The End

In fact, I ended spending about an hour in the home of the Wolicki family. It wasn't enough for David that I see the Mechitzah. He gave me his exact reasons for choosing this particular type of wood. He showed me the specific saws he used and explained the formulas he used to figure the weight distribution of the Mechitzah, in order to determine the necessary physical capacity for the wheels he had attached. I was entranced by the depth and scope of his knowledge, from his attention to detail, to the overall perfection and his love of his work. I asked to see what else he'd made. I had the privilege of seeing the excellent furnishings he'd built for his home, with his own hands, and the wooden games and toys he had made for his daughters. I thanked him for both the beautiful Mechitzah as well as for the carpentry lesson. I told him I would send a large truck to pick up the Mechitzah and transport it to the Beit Hamidrash. But one more surprise awaited me. David insisted that he bring it down himself, so that he could judge whether it was appropriate and consistent with his original design. This is how we discovered that David, in addition to being a talented carpenter, artist, cartoonist, etc. was an excellent porter as well. Finally, it was time to talk about payment. I saw that the topic made David very uncomfortable. It was as if we had done him a favor, even though it was he who had invested tremendous effort and hours upon hours of labor, from our initial trip to take measurements at his expense, to using his personal time to find the perfect wood, including the many hours spend in the construction process, and the tremendous amount of strength to personally carry it down and place it correctly. All through every stage of the project, from design through construction, David never gave a moment of thought to the vast quantities of time it would steal from him or any personal gain, monetarily or otherwise and would not accept a penny more than the cost of the materials. His only concerns were the good and the needs of the local chapter of Bnei Akiva. I always got the feeling during construction that we were doing him a favor in allowing him to build the Mechitzah. It never seemed that he was doing a favor for us. Our chapter owes David a great favor, for both the beautiful Mechitzah, that we have been privileged to enjoy for well over a year and a half, and for the tremendous lessons we learn from his personality as a man, lessons in modesty, happiness, desire to finish what he began, and assistance to others L'Shem Shamayim (for the glory of Heaven), never expecting any reward in return. We pray that each and every one of us will be able to learn from the examples and exceptional behavior that was part and parcel of David, whom we were privileged to know.

Hebrew דברים לזכר דוד ווליצקי ז"ל השבוע הלך לעולמו דוד ווליצקי ז"ל. חז"ל לימדו אותנו במאמרם במסכת סנהדרין שכל יהודי הוא "עולם מלא". רציתי לשתף את הקוראים בסיפור קצר על דוד ז"ל שממחיש מעט מאישיותו המיוחדת של דוד . . כשתכננו את בית המדרש של הסניף אחת הבעיות המרכזיות שעמדה לנגד עינינו הייתה תכנון ובניה של מחיצה שתתאים לצורכי הסניף. רצינו לתכנן מחיצה שתנצל את שטח בית המדרש באופן מירבי. מחיצה שתהיה חזקה מצד אחד אך ניידת מצד שני.חיפשנו נגר שיוכל גם לתכנן וגם לבנות את המחיצה בצורה המושלמת ביותר. אחד מחברי הסניף הציע שנפנה לדוד ונבקש את עזרתו בנושא. אני זוכר ששאלתי את אותו חבר בתמיהה: "מה לדוד ווליצקי ןלנגרות? הוא עובדבמחשבים, לא?" התשובה שקיבלתי הייתה: "נכון, דוד אמנם עובד במחשבים אבל הוא גם נגר, צייר, פסל, גנן, וכו'... הוא מהאלה שעושים הכל ." ." The End

הססתי מאד אם לפנות אליו. הרי זה קצת חוצפה לבקש מאדם שהנגרות אצלו היא רק תחביב ולא מקצוע לתכנן ולבנות מחיצה לבית מדרש, פרוייקט שהוא לא קטן בכלל. אך לאחר שפנינו אליו, דוד לא הטבלט כלל וכלל בשאלה "האם לבנות את המחיצה" ורק חשש שלא יצליח לסיים אותה בזמן עקב עיסוקיו הרבים . . אני רציתי להקל עליו עד כמה שניתן. ניסיתי להסביר לו בטלפון את גודל וצורת המחיצה, אך דוד התעקש להגיע לסניף ולבחון בעצמו את המקום ואת האופציות השונות לבניית המחיצה. כך באותו היום נפגשנו בסניף. הוא הגיע עם כלי המדידה שלו והחל למדוד את בית המדרש לאורך ולרוחב ולחשב זוויות ושטחים. שוב, מחוסר נעימות, ניסיתי להסביר לו שאנו מעונינים במיצה פשוטה שתגיע מצד אחד של הקיר לצידו השני. אך הוא הסביר לי בחיוך, שמחיצה כזו לא תנצל את השטח בצורה הטובה ביותר. צריך לבנות מחיצה מורכבת יותר. בסוף המדידות והחישובים הבטיח שיחשוב על כל האופציות ולאחר שיבדוק את סוגי העצים יתחיל בעבודה . . כשעזבנו את הסניף ניסיתי לדבר איתו על המחיר שיידרוש עבור הבניה. "עזוב, אני אתחיל לבנות, וכשאסיים נדבר על המחיר" הוא אמר. הכסף פשוט לא עניין אותו. לאחר כחודש צלצל אלי דוד והודיע לי בשמחה שסיים את בניית המחיצה. הוא הזמין אותי אליו לביתו כדי לבחון את המוצר המוגמר . . מכיוון שהיה זה יום שישי, חשבתי שאגיע לביתו, אציץ רגע במחיצות ואחזור מיד הביתה. בפועל, ביליתי כמעט שעה בבית משפחת ווליצקי. דוד לא הסתפק בכך שאראה את המחיצה. הוא הסביר לי בדיוק למה בחר את העצים שבחר,את המסורים השונים שבהם השתמש, ואת חישובי המשקל שעשה על מנת לקבוע מבחינה פיזיקלית את משקל הגלגלים שהתקין במחיצות. הייתי מהופנט מהידע הרב, מההשקעה בפרטים עד כדי שלמות, ומהאהבה של דוד לעבודתו. ביקשתי לראות עוד דברים שהוא בנה וזכיתי לראות את רהיטי הבית שבנה במו ידיו, ואת משחקי העץ שהכין לבנותיו . . הודיתי לו צאד על המחיצות המדהימות ועל השיעור בנגרות. אמרתי לו שנשלח רכב גדול שיאסוף את המחיצות ויביא אותם לסניף, אך שוב ציפתה לי הפתעה. דוד עמד על כך שהוא יביא את המחיצות לסניף בעצמו כדי שיוכל לראות שבאמת הן מתאימות לתכנון המקורי שלו. כך גילינו שדוד, בנוסף לכישוריובתור נגר, אומן,צייר וכו', הוא גם סבל מצליח . . כשהגיע הזמן שבו דיברנו סוף סוף על התשלום, ראיתי שכל העניין מאד לא נעים לדוד, כאילו שאנחנו עשינו לו טובה. למרות שהשקיע מאמצים רבים ושעות עבודה מרובות, החל בהגעה לסניף לתכנון המחיצות, דרך הנסיעח על חשבונו ובזמנו הפנוי על מנת לבחור את העצים המתאימים, השעות הרבות שהשקיע בבניית המחיצות, וכלה בזמן ובמאמץ שהשקיע להביא את המחיצןתלסניף ולהעמידם במקומם, לא הסים לקחת יותר ממחיר עלות החומרים! בכל שלבי התכנון והביצוע של בניית המחיצה, לא חשב דוד לרגע על הזמן הרב שפרוייקט זה יגזול ממנו או על רווחתו האישית, אלה רק על טובת וצרכי הסניף . . תמיד קיבלתי ממנו את התחושה שאנחנו עושים לו טובה בעצם העבודה שאנחנו מאפשרים לו לבנות לנו את המחיצות ולא שהוא עושה טובה בשבילנו. הסניף כולו חייב טובה גדולה לדוד, הן על המחיצות שאנו נהנים מהשימוש בהן כבר למעלה משנה וחצי, והן על השיעורים הגדולים שלמדנו מאישיותו בתור בן אדם. שיעורים בענווה, בשמחה, בשאיפה לשלמות וגמילות חסד לשם שמיים שלא על מנת לקבל פרס . . אנו מתפללים שנדע כל אחד ואחד ללמוד מדמותו ומאישיותו המיוחדים של דוד כפי שזכינו להקירו . . צבי פיין

The End

The End

BMC (David's Employer) At the time of David's death, Benjie was being considered for employment, also as a technical writer, at the same company, but in a different branch. Six months later, BMC interviewed Benjie (at the time, a new employee) for the company newsletter about himself, but mostly about David. I include here, parts of that interview that are relevant to David. The included parts in English are after the Hebrew.

Hebrew כותרת: "זה משהו שדייויד היה אומר..." כשבנג'י ווליצקי, כתב טכני באתר תל חי, מגיע לפגישות ברמת החייל, הוא פוגש באנשים שעבדו עם אחיו דייויד ז"ל. לעיתים הוא רואה את הקושי בפניהם, לעיתים משהו בו מזכיר להם את דייויד שהלך לעולמו בטרם עת. בנג'י, מספר על אחיו, מתגעגע לשיחות איתו, ולא מבין איך הספיק לעזור לכל כך הרבה אנשים. בנג'י ווליצקי התחיל לעבוד ב BMC- תל-חי חודשים ספורים אחרי טרגדיה משפחתית, המוכרת היטב לאנשי החברה: אחיו הבכור, דייויד ז"ל, שעבד ב BMC- רמת החייל ככתב טכני, נפטר במפתיע בשנה שעברה, טב "ז סיון תשס"ד . . "ביום חמישי קיבלתי טלפון מאבי", אומר בנג'י, ועיניו מתמלאות דמעות, "שסיפר לי שדייויד בבית חולים. חשבנו שזה שבץ, אבל הסתבר שהתפוצץ לו כלי דם במוח. בשבת בבוקר נפטר, בן ארבעים בלבד, כשהוא משאיר אחריו אישה ושתי בנות: בת שש, ובת שנה וחצי". המוות הפתאומי של דייויד הותיר את בני המשפחה המומים וכואבים. לא רק אותם. "שמעתי מחבריו לעבודה", אומר בנג'י, "שאנשים הסתובבו במחלקה כאילו שהשמיים נפלו. זה היה הלם גדול גם עבורם". בין המבקרים הרבים שהגיעו לנחם, היו חברים לעבודה ומנהלים מ BMC- , שהשתדלו להעניק למשפחה תמיכה ועזרה ככל שנדרשו. בנג'י הכיר את מקום העבודה של אחיו מסיפורים ששמע ממנו, וגם באופן אישי: זמן קצר לפני כן, הגיע בעצמו לראיון עבודה, כדי להתקבל למשרה מסוימת באתר בתל-חי, שבסופו של דבר הוקפאה. במהלך ימי השבעה שמע דבר שהפתיע אותו: אחד המנהלים אמר לו ששמע שאולי יבוא לעבוד אצלו . . "זה היה לי מוזר", אומר בנג'י, "כי אני בעצמי לא ידעתי על זה... בתום השבעה, התקשר אלי המנהל הישיר של דייויד, ואמר לי שהמשרה ההיא אמנם מוקפאת עדיין, אבל הוא הזמין אותי להתראיין למשרה אחרת, באותה המחלקה בה עבד דייויד, אבל באתר תל-חי. בסופו של דבר, הציעו לי הצעת עבודה שהתאימה לי והעובדה שידעתי מדייויד שמדובר במקום שטוב לעבוד בו, בהחלט תרמה להחלטתי". בנג'י השתלב בחברה בתפקיד של כתב טכני, כאחיו לפניו, "ואנחנו לא היחידים במשפחה", הוא אומר. "גם אמי עוסקת בכתיבה טכנית". - כיצד הגיבו אנשים שעבדו עם דייויד, כשפגשו אותך כעובד מן המניין ? ? "לי עצמי מוזר לפעמים, שאני עובד עם אותם אנשים שהוא עבד איתם. כשאני מגיע לרמת החייל, אני פוגש אנשים שאת חלקם היכרתי קודם, ואני רואה שקשה להם במידה מסוימת לפגוש אותי. בישיבת צוות, לפני שבועיים, למשל, אמרתי משהו, ומישהי קפצה ואמרה 'זה משהו שדייויד היה אומר... .' .' זה מצחיק אבל מי שלמד כתיבה טכנית בצורה מסודרת זה אני, והוא דווקא התגלגל לזה די במקרה. הוא התחיל לעבוד בחברה קטנה בגינות שומרון, היישוב בו התגורר וכשאמי שמעה מה הוא עושה, היא אמרה לו: 'מה שאתה עושה זה בעצם כתיבה טכנית .' כשרצה להתקדם בתחום והגיש מועמדות לחברה מקצועית יותר שחיפשה כתב, קיבל את המישרה והופתע מעצמו. אותה חברה, ניו דיימנשן, נרכשה מאוחר יותר על -ידי BMC". - תאר לנו את אחיך . . The End

"אנחנו חמישה אחים, נולדנו למשפחה שחייתה בארצות הברית ועברה למונטריאול, קנדה. הגענו ארצה לשנת שבתון וחזרנו לקנדה כולנו, פרט לאח אחד, שנשאר פה. בשנים שלאחר מכן, עלינו ארצה, כל אחד בגפו. דייויד, שלמד פסיכולוגיה בישיבה אוניברסיטה שבניו יורק, לקראת תואר דוקטור, הגיע אחרינו. בסופו של דבר, הוא לא השלים את התואר משום שעבודה שהכין, שבדקה את נושא ההומוסקסואליות כמחלת נפש, התקבלה בכעס רב על-ידי סטודנטים אחרים. חוסר הסובלנות שלהם גרם לו לא להמשיך בתחום הזה. הוא היה טיפוס מאוד מיוחד, יצירתי, לא שגרתי . . דייויד היה אדם מבריק, איש אשכולות של ממש, צייר ואמן, שיצר עבודות נפלאות ממגוון חומרים: זכוכית, עץ, בד, ותמיד היה עסוק בלימוד והתנסות בדברים חדשים. פנו אליו כדי שיצייר על החלונות בבית הכנסת בגינות שומרון, והוא אמר: אני לא יודע לצייר על זכוכית. הלכו וחיפשו מישהו אחר והוא בינתיים הזמין ספרים וצבעים, ולמד את הנושא במשך שנתיים. רק אחר כך הוא הציע את עצמו שוב לעבודה - והתקבל מיד. לצורך הציור הוא חקר את המדרשים כדי לדעת כיצד נראו סמלי השבטים, צייר את שנים עשר הסמלים ועשה עבודה מופלאה . . דייויד בנה חלק ניכר מהרהיטים בביתו - כל אחד מהם יצירת אמנות רבת יופי. בפתח הבית שלי תלוי שלט מעץ, פרי עבודתו. הוא אייר את הכתובה שלי ושל האחים האחרים, וזכה בתחרות לאיור כתובות שערכה המועצה המקומית בקרני שומרון. כל דבר שעשה, אפילו עבודות גננות, יצא מדהים". קולו של בנג'י נשנק. השכול עדיין טרי והאבידה עצומה. "יש כל כך הרבה סיפורים עליו", הוא לוחש, "על חלקם שמענו רק בשבעה. אחי עזר לכולם. בכל פעם שמישהו היה צריך משהו, הוא היה שם". הוא היה שם , בשביל לבנות לסניף של בני עקיבא מחיצה לתפילה על גלגלים , שיהיה קל להזיז ולקפל . הוא היה שם בשביל בת השכן , ילדה בת שנה וחצי , שעברה ניתוח ושתי רגליה גובסו , כך שלא יכלה לזחול ולשחק. דייויד בנה לה תוך מספר ימים שולחן על גלגלים, כדי שתוכל לשחק עליו. הוא היה בהרבה מקומות נוספים, ותמיד הצניע את פועלו . . - מתי הוא הספיק לעשות הכל ? ? בנג'י: "שאלה טובה. אין לנו מושג". בנג'י מתחיל לחייך, כשהוא נזכר איך דייויד רצה תמיד לעשות הכל בדרכו שלו: "אבי אוהב לספר עליו שבתיכון, היתה לו מורה לתנ"ך שהוא לא הסתדר איתה. באחד המבחנים שהיא נתנה לכיתה היתה שאלה ודייויד, במקום לענות עליה במלים, פשוט צייר הכל. המורה נתנה לו אפס. כשחזר הביתה עם המבחן אבי אמר לו: 'ענית להפליא', והלך עם המבחן למנהל. המנהל צחק ואמר: 'אתה צודק. - הייתם קרובים זה לזה? בנג'י: "כן. יש בינינו הפרש של ארבע שנים בלבד. אמנם היינו מרוחקים פיזית - אני במעלות והוא בגינות שומרון, אבל דיברנו המון בטלפון. דייויד ידע הכל, היה מלא וגדוש בידע, וידעתי שלפני שאני הולך להתקשר אליו כדי להתייעץ איתו, כדאי שאפנה הרבה זמן. ידעתי שהוא לא יניח לי, עד שאקבל את כל המידע האפשרי ממנו..."

English

"That is something that David would have said…" When Benjie Wolicki, a technical writer in Tel Chai, comes to meetings at Ramat HaChayal, he meets people who worked with his brother David, of blessed memory. Sometimes he senses the difficulty for them in their faces. Sometimes something in him reminds them of David, who passed away before his time. Benjie tells about his brother, yearns for their conversations, and does not understand how David had time to help so many people. Benjie Wolicki started to work in BMC Tel Chai a few months after the family tragedy that is so well known to the employees of BMC, the sudden death last year on June 5, 2004 of his older brother (the eldest), who worked as a technical writer in Ramat HaChayal. "On Friday, I received a telephone call from my father", says Benjie his eyes filling with tears, "who told me that David was in the hospital. We thought it was a stroke. But, The End

apparently some blood vessels in the brain burst. On Shabbat, in the morning, he died. He was only forty years old and he left behind him a wife and two daughters, aged six and a year and a half." The sudden death of David left the members of the family shocked and in pain. Not only them. "I heard from his colleagues at work," says Benjie, "that people were walking around in the department in which he worked as though the heavens had fallen. It was a big shock for them too." Among the many visitors who came to visit at the house of mourning, were David's fellow workers and managers from BMC, who tried to extend whatever support and assistance to the family that they could. Benjie had heard about BMC as a workplace from his brother, and also personally. A short time earlier, he had been interviewed for a position in the Tel Chai branch, which had subsequently been frozen. In the course of the Shiva week, one of the managers mentioned to Benjie that he expected to see Benjie working at BMC in the near future. "It was strange to me," says Benjie, "because I myself hadn't known about it. At the end of the week, David's direct manager called me and said that although the original position was still frozen, I was invited to an interview for a different position in the department in which David had worked, but at the Tel Chai location." In the end, they offered me a position that was right for me, and the fact that I knew from David that BMC was a good place to work definitely contributed to my decision to accept it. Benjie works as a technical writer, like his brother before him. "And we aren't the only ones in the family," he says. "My mother is also a technical writer."

How did people who had worked with David react when you encountered them as a fellow worker? "For me personally, it is sometimes strange, that I work with the same people with whom he worked. At Ramat HaChayal, when I encounter some of the people who I knew before, I can tell that it is somewhat difficult for them to see me. For example, in a staff meeting two weeks ago, I said something and someone jumped up and said, "That is something that David would have said…" "It is funny that I am the one who learned technical writing formally. And he actually came to it accidentally. He started to work in a small company in Ginot Shomron, where he lives. When my mother heard what he was doing, she said to him that what he was doing was technical writing. When he wanted to advance in the field and applied for a position in a better company as a writer, he himself was surprised when he was accepted. That same company, New Dimension, was later bought by BMC."

Describe your brother. "We were five brothers. We were all born in the United States and moved to Montreal, Canada. We came to Israel for a Sabbatical year. All except one of us, who stayed here, returned to Montreal. In the years that followed, each of us moved to Israel, each on his own. "David, who learned towards a doctorate in psychology in Yeshiva University in New York, came later. In the end, he never completed his doctorate because the work that he was preparing, the subject of which was homosexuality as a psychological disorder, was received with anger and opposition. Their intolerance toward his thesis led him to drop this field entirely. He was a very exceptional type of person - creative and unusual. The End

"David was brilliant, a true renaissance man. He was an artist and an artisan, who created wonderful things from a wide range of materials: glass, wood, fabric, and more. He was also always involved in learning and practicing new things. When he was approached to design and decorate the windows in the synagogue in Ginot Shomron, he said that he did not know how to paint on glass. While they looked for someone else, he purchased books and materials on the subject, and practiced for two years. At the end of the two years, when he felt ready, he offered his services and was accepted immediately. For the designs, he researched the Midrashim (early biblical commentaries) to determine the original appearance of the banners of the twelve tribes. He drew all twelve designs. It was an amazing piece of work. "David built a lot of the furniture in his house – each one a work of art and craftsmanship. At the entrance of my house hangs a sign made from wood, the work of David. He illuminated my marriage contract and that of each of my brothers, each in a different style, according to the wishes of the couple. His illumination of a marriage contract was chosen in a competition run by the local religious council to be the standard marriage contract given to couples in the region. Everything he did, even gardening projects, was amazing." Benjie's voice breaks. The tragedy is still fresh the loss is great. "There are so many stories about him," he whispers. "Some of them we only heard during the week of Shiva. My brother helped everyone. Anytime anyone needed something, he was there. "He was there to build a Mechitza on wheels for the local branch of Bnei Akiva that would be easy to move and fold up. He was there for the daughter of a neighbor, a little girl who was a year and a half old. She had had an operation and both of her legs were bandaged in a cast so that she couldn't crawl and play. Within a few days (without being asked), David built her a special table on wheels on which she could play and eat. He was involved in many other things, too, always quietly, modestly, in the background."

When did he have time to do everything? Benjie answers, "That's a good question. I have no idea." Benjie begins to smile as he remembers how David always had to do it his way. "My father loves to tell about a Torah teacher that David had in high school, with whom he did not get along. As an answer to one question on a test, David provided an illustration instead of answering in words. The teacher gave him a zero. When he brought the test home, my father told him, "You answered the question perfectly." My father took the test to the principal. The principal laughed and said, "You are right!"

Were you close? "Yes, there is only a difference of four years between us. Physically, we were far from one another, with me in Ma'alot and him in Ginot Shomron. Nevertheless, we spoke to one another a lot. David knew everything. He was filled to overflowing with knowledge. I knew that before I called him to ask his advice or opinion on something I had to allow a large block of time. I knew he wouldn't let me go until he was sure that I had all the right information from him..." The End

Letter to Miriam, from David's co-workers at BMC (Editor's Note: This was written by Michal Berman on behalf of all the workers in David's department at BMC. It accompanied drawing materials presented to Miriam during the week of Shiva.) Dear Miriam, I don't know if you will be home when I come to visit you and your family, so I wrote this note just in case. I want you to know that your father was very proud of you and talked about you all the time at work. He used to bring in pictures that you had drawn and show them to us. When someone who is an excellent artist tells you that you draw nicely, it really means a lot. And your father really liked how you draw. So that really means a lot. Just like you are sad that your father is not here anymore, so are we at work. We miss him. And we are going to miss the pictures that you drew that he used to bring in to us. We want you to have some things to color with. David told us how much you like to color. This week there are going to be a lot of people coming to your house to visit, so you can color to keep yourself busy. Or maybe, if you are feeling very sad, you can color a sad picture… or if you are feeling angry, you can color an angry picture and then crumple it up really tight and throw it in the garbage, or if you are feeling OK, you can draw a nice picture too, maybe of something fun you and your dad did together. Whatever you like. Maybe you could sometimes draw a picture or two for us? We would really like that. Your mom can bring it to us or mail it to us. The address at the company is: BMC Software 6 Habarzel Street POB 58168 Tel Aviv, 61581 We hope to see you soon, Michal, Alan, Moshe, Debbie, Yael, Andy, Bill, Shane, Leslie, Yaron, Eliezer, Joel, Myron, Avi, Yechezkel and Aryeh The End

by Jerry Blumberg מזמור לדוד (Editor's Note: Although Jerry Blumberg had been a friend of David's for a long time, in the weeks just before David's death, the friendship became closer. They started taking long walks together for the purpose of improving the health of both of them. On these walks, naturally, they shared many experiences. Most of what Jerry wrote, I include below.) During the several weeks prior to David's sudden death, we became closer friends. Though we shared the passions of gardening and creative woodworking, we grew closer as evening walking partners. The cadence of walking steps opens up one's soul to put the clutter of everyday life in order and open windows to past experiences. "Call me David, never Dave," he stated emphatically. That characterized his world: strong, stubborn, uncompromising, "Do it yourself, if you want it done right," kind of guy. David had a strong opinion on everything from his vast reading and educational background and his experiences that he shared with me. As he told me of all his experiences while growing up, I began to understand how each contributed to the man he had become. The strongest recurring topic in our talks was his family. David was very excited about his father's upcoming retirement, which would allow his father to finally become himself, instead of being bound by leadership constraints, as he had been for so many years. David's brothers and their activities were always mentioned fondly, especially the wonderful group of cousins his girls had. Aliza's father, his care and welfare were always on his mind, since he lived alone and was very dear to David. Aliza and the girls were his focus in life. The responsibility of providing family upkeep is what pushed him to become a technical writer, even though he was really an artist at heart. David would phone the girls to say "Good Night" while we were on our walks, since it was around bedtime. His future hopes were for a bigger home with a play area for the girls, and an accessible craft and work area for himself. I secretly hoped that we could work on projects together and I could benefit from his knowledge and skills. Though I was able to assist him to install the .work was done quietly חסד windows and deliver the Mechitza, most of his I decided to take on a new challenge as a way of coping with losing David. I started to learn as David did, beginning with the book of Proverbs, hopefully to understand ,דעת מקרא wisdom such as David's. I began with the first verse and halted. David would never have done it that way. I went back to the beginning, and this time read the Foreword, Introduction and footnotes, as he always did. David and I shared a strong belief that working on synagogue projects in our "mini Temple" were tangible indications of our preparedness to build and maintain the real thing, may it be rebuilt in our days. There are different ways that the third Temple could be built. One is to be assembled by qualified men here on earth. Another possibility is that it is currently being assembled, stone by stone, in heaven, by every "mitzvah" that we do, and it will descend ready built. I am not a proponent of the second possibility. The redemption is near, the Temple building is almost done and David was called up to put on the finishing touches in Heaven. I find the thought comforting. May God comfort all the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem. Jerry Blumberg, Tamuz 5764, June 2004 The End

Collected Brief Comments (Editor's Note: The excerpts included here were culled from various communications (cards and email) sent to members of the family. There were communications from many more people that I did not include, because although they expressed condolences to the family, they did not include any descriptive comments about David.)

Colleagues Eliram Braudo, (STC), "I have known David only for the past two years, since I became active in organizing the various STC events. But, even in that relatively short period, I have come to appreciate his ability to convey clearly any topic he was presenting, whether at a local event or at the annual technical writing convention. This, always accompanied by a humorous touch, which was particularly evident at the last event at which he presented, only three weeks ago." Ari Gerber (BMC), "I always appreciated David's willingness to help, to answer questions, his warmth, his wit." Houston team (BMC), "David was a significant contributor in the redesign of the documentation. He always showed great dedication and enthusiasm." David Schor (STC), "I knew David on a professional basis and, even though we did not socialize outside of a professional environment, I liked and respected him a great deal. He helped me organize an STC lecture evening at BMC a few years ago and I attended a few of his presentations over the years. Just a few weeks ago, he gave a short presentation at an STC event and even though he was talking to everyone in the group, I felt his eye contact quite strongly and enjoyed the passion that expressed about the topic." Debbie Shapiro (STC), "It was with great shock that we returned to work after the weekend and learned of the passing of David Wolicki. We had just conducted a successful event – the Ideas Market – with David presenting on "Making Friends with Marketing" – a topic that many enjoyed… David was a great contributor to STC events and our convention. He was also an inspiring professional. I don't know how he could manage teams that handled 80 to 90 documents at a time, but he did… " Frank Taylor (STC), "David always presented with a smile and a quick wit." Techshoret (STC online news group), "David was a rising star in our community, someone willing to give of his knowledge and his patience. He was so young, so smart. Many of us will remember his quick smile, his witty comments, and his interest in the technical writing community. There was much about David that we did not know, such as that he was an artist and a perfectionist who created amazing works of beauty. But, what we did know was that he was always there with a smile to brighten the room and help you see the light side of things that just moments before seemed so serious. David presented at the first STC convention, and at several community events. He willing shared his knowledge, his opinions, his sense of humor, and his smiles." Beth Thompson (BMC), "David was passionate about his work and uncompromising in his standards of excellence." Dottie Wood (BMC), "David epitomized devotion, dedication and integrity." The End

Friends and Family Leah Cohen (originally, from Montreal), "I remember him both as a boy, when you and your family first moved to St. Laurent, and as an adult, when I would bump into him in Israel. David always struck me as friendly, discursive, honest, and reflective. I enjoyed hearing him discuss issues, such as his views on psychology, after his studies at Yeshiva University. I also remember him taking art lessons with my mother, as well as doing gardening, and I used to wonder if he was a kindred spirit to my own family." Marc Leeds (cousin), "I will always remember his sweet nature and big smile." Marion and Harry Reiss (in-laws), "We first met David as an actor at Yeshiva University when he played the role of God in the play J.B, in which our son Jonathan also had a role. David stood out from the others, not only for his performing talent, which was formidable, but for his friendly and kindly demeanor towards us as the parents of a friend. So open was his personality in fact, that when I met him a year or so later, I had no hesitation in engaging him in conversation about his plans for the future. Thinking of him still as an actor, I was surprised when he outlined a very traditional course of study in Psychology. The expression on his face belied any enthusiasm for the plan. When I commented on that, he said, "Well, it is something to do."… From then on we met many times. We remember and admired many of the things he made, and will always treasure the trivets that you gave us with their intricate designs. We will always remember David as we first met him, warm and friendly, overflowing with talent, vitality and energy." Gary Rubin (cousin), "David was a gentle, caring man." Mark Stolovitsky (originally, from Montreal), "David had a great sense of humor." Janet Wieder (family friend), "David was a great man." Moishe and Susan Wieder (family friend), "David was a beautiful soul who we watched from afar as he grew and as his life took on direction no one would have imagined 10 or 15 years ago. We all mourn that David is no longer with us." A Few More Pictures

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For Sale Sign

David and Aliza were planning to sell their home so they could move to something bigger that would have more room for David's hobbies, among other things. Note the alarm on the face of the house that is for sale.

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David's Fortieth Birthday, Six Months Before the End