Askadude Report

AskADUDE report From Powered by Videographer - the Askadude team 2 Table of content 5 Summary 7 Introduction Chapter : I. The problems Askadude helps to solve II. How is Askadude different? III. Achievement unlocked! IV. What’s required for Askadude to Run? V. How it works VI. Intended outcomes & theory of change VII. How do we spread Ask a Dude? VIII. What resources are required (our ask) IX. HOW-TO-GUIDE 1. How we recruit FACILITATORS 2. How we recruit PARTICIPANTS TO VIEWING PARTIES 3. How we find & prepare wing men 4. How we find & prepare hosts X. Appendices - the Askadude team 3 4 Summary Quality of life is a trendy topic within community living organizations - and whilst there is increasing focus on physical and social wellbeing, there is a lot less focus on psychological and sexual wellbeing. Ask A Dude puts explicit focus on men; honed in our user group; team operating as Headquarters sexual health and wellbeing by developed original video content making the video content and opening up conversation between and a process for making that conversational tools. We estimate men on topics around sexuality, content; and begun to develop the the cost of this over one year to dating, and relationships. We know roles and the training required to be $XX. We believe the cost can from the literature that open and spread videos via watching events. be offset by charging subscription honest conversations are a major Now, the question is how to take fees, or a fee-for-service model to protective factor for healthy and Ask A Dude forward, from small- other agencies for the content. safe sexuality.1 scale prototype to scale? Over the past six-months, we’ve We have identified three models of taken Ask A Dude from being scale: (1) in a box (2) as a program a provocative idea to being a (3) as a party. Each model has promising solution. We’ve tested different resourcing requirements. whether the idea is attractive to At it’s core, we need a small 1. Sex Information and Education Council of Canada. (2010). Sexual Health Education in the Schools: Questions and Answers, 3rd Edition. Retrieved ii Ontario Ministry of Education. (2012). Education Facts. Retrieved from www.sieccan.org/pdf/she_q&a_3rd.pdf 5 Some of the people we met during our ethnography: 6 Introduction Askadude is a catalogue of videos + a series of facilitated viewing parties, which promote discussion of sexuality, dating and relationships. These aren’t just any videos. They So how do guys view these videos? participants are invited to go on are made with dudes, for dudes, At a viewing party! These can camera and add their voice to the using a language and approach take place in homes, programs, or conversation if they want to. that is very different than your community spaces. Participants typical sex education. (dudes of all ages orientations, genders and abilities) get together We take real-life questions about over pizza and pop and watch the sex, dating and relationships videos. Think a Grey Cup party from adults living with cognitive atmosphere. A facilitator then disabilities. Then we make videos leads a discussion about the where frank, candid, funny, content of the videos. He asks irreverent guys have conversations for the participants’ perspectives about those questions, and come on what they’ve seen, and up with answers that work. creates a dialogue around dating, relationships and sex. Lastly, the 7 8 I. THE PROBLEMS ASKADUDE HELPS TO SOLVE Askadude grew out of 3 months of user research into sex, love dating and relationships as experienced by adults living with a cognitive disability. We identified four pain points: Staff don’t know their employers’ 1 expectations when it comes to supporting sexualities. Consequently, accurate information 2 is withheld or only presented in a risk & safety context. There are systemic barriers to 3 relationships. Men are particularly left out of 4 the conversation. 9 1 Staff not knowing We found that many direct service employers’ expectations to guide ignore sexuality or to convey staff don’t feel like they have the them. (Several staff referred to conservative values to the people tools to have conversations about this as their “common sense”. they support. sexuality, dating and relationships. But what constitutes “common They aren’t sure what community sense” varies greatly from staff For too many folks living with a living agencies’ expectations to staff - particularly when it cognitive disability, these factors of them are: Are they allowed comes to sexuality - and it is are perpetuating social exclusion to answer questions on these often incongruous with actual and hindering full self-expression topics? Are the people they’re agency policies.) Many staff also and quality of life supporting allowed to date? In report the usual concern that the absence of clarity, staff are doing something wrong will lead left with their own values and to censure. Most staff conclude their assumptions about their that the safest approach is to Folks like Rupan. He asks regularly to wear makeup and nail polish and a sari. His staff think this is attention-seek- ing behaviour and tell him he can wear makeup once a year on Halloween when Folks like Pat. He is very inter- he dresses like Dracula. When he’s ested in sex but afraid to ask told this, Rupan gets upset and breaks questions. He’s been fed lots of things. Then staff sedate him. misinformation to keep him in the dark, such as “masturbation makes your brain shrink” 10 2 Risk and safety narrative dominantes Likely as a result of this lack of Conversations about relationships, There are reasons for this risk and staff clarity and broader cultural partnering etc. are framed as safety narrative. We are working prejudices, we found that adults either: “that would be nice” with with a population that has a higher with cognitive disabilities and no plans to act, or moved in a risk of being sexually abused. the staff that support them are different, ‘safer’ direction, where We are working with a population operating from a risk and safety the only sexual behaviour takes that sometimes exhibits sexual narrative when it comes to sex, place alone and is not talked behaviour out of step with cultural dating and relationships. When about. Some relationships conventions. It is easier to create it occurs at all, conversation and operate within a frame that can simple, universal prescriptive education are focused on STI’s, comfortably fit into log notes: a scripts from a risk and safety how to use a condom, and birth coffee date, a festive dance, etc. narrative. But that does not foster control. Less common but also detrimental growth. Or learning. Or joy. are staff who support people who ARE dating, but believe that such relationships are “none of their business” and don’t talk about them - denying the individual insight or feedback on common relationship dynamics. 11 3 Systemic Barriers We also found that many people experience systemic barriers to building and maintaining their romantic relationships. Folks like Josh. He lived in a Folks like the scores of group home and his girlfriend people we’ve worked with lived with her parents. When Folks like Joseph and over the years who say they they told their support networks Leanne. They have been want a boyfriend or girl- they wanted to get engaged, romantic partners for more friend, a husband or wife, they were told their service than two decades but have but have never gone on a hours would be cut. Josh’s never been allowed to live single date. group home staff started re- together. When asked if they fusing to drive him to dates. He wanted to marry, they both is unable to use public transit. replied in unison “It’s too The relationship soon fell apart. expensive.” 12 4 Men left out Several male staff told us they is appropriate in public. We heard by current formal models of sex didn’t think this conversation was whispers about guys who still talk and relationship education, and “for their guys” while in the next about their “girlfriend” although that they have less of a culture of breath telling us about purchasing they haven’t seen that person in discussing relationships - their blow-up dolls or sending them years. Research shows that men joys and discontents (McNamarra to classes to talk about what is (in the disability sector and be- et al., 2011). appropriate in private and what yond) are not being well served 13 II. HOW IS ASKADUDE DIFFERENT? Some sexual health and relationship education programs aimed at people with developmental disabilities already exist: The Sunny Hill program has The Circles program teaches what legal and ethical conditions excellent information on the about physical and social must be met for two people to mechanics of the body. This is boundaries from a prescriptive, agree to start dating. It says not sufficient. In his 1991 book safety-oriented perspective. nothing about how someone might on sexuality and disability, “I This is not sufficient. The social express interest in another person, Contact”, David Hingsburger world has too many variables for or gage another person’s interest asserts that human sexuality a simple, universal script to be in them. Nor does it say anything cannot be minimized into the effective. (For example, Circles’ about what might happen once physical act. Essentially, “sex” accompanying VHS tapes were two people start dating. Circles is about what one does, and created in the 1980s. The social can help prevent some lousy “sexuality” is about who one norms informing some of their outcomes.

Load more