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School Director Had a Quote from Child Psychologist, Haim Ginott, Tucked on Her Wall Between Framed, Finger-Painted Flowers and a Photo of Her Adventures in Africa

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School Director Had a Quote from Child Psychologist, Haim Ginott, Tucked on Her Wall Between Framed, Finger-Painted Flowers and a Photo of Her Adventures in Africa Dear Lower School Parents, My daughter’s pre-school director had a quote from child psychologist, Haim Ginott, tucked on her wall between framed, finger-painted flowers and a photo of her adventures in Africa. Having arrived early on conference day some ten years ago, I read it repeatedly while waiting for our meeting to begin. Today it still remains a mantra that prescribes my work with children. It helps me stay mindful and present. Ginott said: I’ve come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. As a teacher, I possess a tremendous power to make a child’s life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or de-humanized. As adults in children’s lives, how we respond matters. As educators, we must pay attention to the “story in front of us” instead of the “story in our mind.” Dr. Ginott’s words speak to this. For teachers and parents, life is busy, complicated, and full of agenda items. It’s hard to have authentic responses to our children if our minds are somewhere else. It is difficult to remain present with children if we have the story of who we think they should be running through our minds. How do we listen for the story they are telling? Do they love soccer as much as I want them to? Am I aware of how much I’m on my phone or computer after my children are home? Am I making this story in writer’s workshop more mine than theirs with my suggestions? Am I managing my stress so that it doesn’t inadvertently affect my family? The good news is that mindfulness is a practice. I was in a first grade class last week as the day began. The leader led the class in the recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance and the class rules, followed by a breathing exercise with the help of an expandable sphere (breathe in, sphere opens; breathe out, sphere closes). What a beautiful tool to help children learn how to calm and focus themselves. Last year our Lower School faculty began an exploration into the practice of mindfulness through a partnership with The Momentous Institute, a wonderful local organization dedicated to helping educators launch children who are “self-regulated, good communicators, problem- solvers, empathetic, grateful, gritty and optimistic.” That work lead to some intentional changes that address such needs for our students. We created a schedule that allows for children to go deep and narrow in their studies instead of shallow and wide. Children of all ages take part in weekly class meetings to discuss and find solutions for important class issues, practice mindfulness techniques that promote self-awareness, and team building strategies to improve collaboration. These meetings value student voice and leadership and allow them to have critical conversations in a safe environment. We have also continued partnering with parents through Bright Starts mornings and our special speakers series. One thing I know for certain is that life will give us plenty of opportunities to respond. I’ve come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in my home (on the field/court, in the stands, grocery line, carpool, etc.). It is my daily mood that makes the weather. As a parent, I possess a tremendous power to make a child’s life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or de-humanized. Here’s to our journey together this year! I look forward to working with you and your precious children, and I’m incredibly thankful for your partnership. Blessings, Tracey Shirey Assistant Head of Lower School .
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