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G-946-38 "All the News that's Tone to Print" IP. Tonetown, Dreamland, Outer Edge --~l):::;ol~. 1~9_-,:.:N:::;o·,.:.7:,8 _____________________________________________________ Wednesday July 78, 1986 GRAHPS VAHISHES Hometown Dogwonder Franklin Snarl Linked to Mysterious Disappearance Wins 6th Consecutive A very strange but lovable Tonetown own somewhere. tor from another parasphere. visitor. who calls himself Gramps, has He was reported last seen around "He was just a great guy," said Ultra Journalism recently disappeared. moonup, June 26, with real estate Stelgad. manager ol the Daglets, as she Gramps was one of the only visitors magnate, Franklin Snarl. ruffled the soft green feathers in her Award who, in spite of his untass apparel, was "It seemed he was resisting some," intense pink hair. well accepted in Tonetown. said one witness who wished to be "He was the one who gave us the Tonetown'sown Ennio, better known After visiting with several of Tone unnamed. great idea for the Zagtone, our ultra as "The Legend,'' has done it again. town's most prominent citizens, like But Snarl denies these reports. "I touch new instrument that's helped He's won the lnter-Moonal Ultra Jour Stelgad of the Daglets, Flo of Flo's Party never heard of the guyl " Snarl insisted. our new tune, 'Tu~,' hit the top," she nal ism Award forthesixthyearina row. Supplies and Nuyu, editor of the Times, Other citizens, however. have given added enthusiastically. This year the canny canine snapped Gramps evidently wandered off on his glowing reports of the strange old visi- Continued on Page 4 up the prize with his investigative arti cle about intra-dimensional travel through a new invention called "The Hoop." At great risk to his health, Ennio Enniogranted us the following inter actually traveled through the hoop and view as he typed upsomeofthestories back again to gain first-hand knowl you see in this issue. Pets or Wetlands Myst ry! edge of the device. His article, "HOOP TAKES USERS FOR A LOOP THROUGH Interview with t:nnio Pests? Tonetown travelers disappear in the TIME AND SPACE," was published in TT: What is it that makes you such a the April 15 issue of the 1bnetown great reporter. Ennio? vicinity of the Wetlands Times. The furor over the Blobpets Ennio was born and raised right ENNIO: l'fy nose. lfauing a dog's rages as many citizens find nose is a real boon - that's two O's - themselves rugless here in Tonetown. His firstjob was as in this biz. pup reporter for the Campus Clutter whileatt.endingtheLunaQuatroversity IT: With the kind of credentials you "It bums me up," says Nessie Loch, in Tussly. After graduating he landed a have now, Ennio, it seems you could recent blob pet purchaser. '"They're cute, position as a feature writer for the just about write your ticket to any- but tough to housebreak." 7assly Daily, where he worked for 76 where. Why do you stay here in Man~ other. blobpet .o_wne. ..,;. share · ~-'""'"'"'~oetlod1s.... ________JM,U~ toL.1.m~n7r___~------------~ ................ .,...•• t,;,n,;o ;;,.-- c s rus lions. re or e1r ur Buteventually-and fortunately for .f.NNlO: As I've said, my home is rowing abilities by Franklin Snarl, blob us- he returned to Tonetown as a re here. My heart is here. And besides, pets can dig a hole in surfaces as hard porter for the Times, and started raking there are ve.ry few places as lass as as wood and linoleum at the rate of in the awards. 10netown. f.ven 11J.ss/y, with the l l 18 cubic centimeters per tock. " My heart is really in it here," he Quatroversity and all, did not have the says. "because your heart is where your excitement you find in 1bnetown. home is." Continued on Page 4' Search party feared lost too TWo local couples, out for a roman in the Wetland s. e~ e n with th e seven tic stroll in t11e Wetlands, vanished re moons. a search party was sent out as cently. And now search efforts have soon as dawn broke the next morning. bogged down. too. But now. over 24 hours later. they too Jonboi Waltune Gets Walking It was just two evenings ago. accord have not returned. ing to witnesses, that the two townsomes "We:ve had mysteries in the Wetlands Papers-Fuddy Appearance Cited went Wetlandish-and never returned. before," says Chief Fi reweather. "But "They said they craved a walk to the they've always been solved in a day or Erstwhile Tonetown eyesore Jonboi with someone else's name on one hip Wetlands. but they'd be back for another so. We know there's <;Orne curious crea Waltune. cited for aggravated toneles.s pocket." Fizzie," said Wendy Wando. a wait tures living out there. But they're usu nes.s. left town quietly last night. Sore Chaz offered to give the Jonboi a Unlike former pet-types like doggies res.s at Fast Freddies. "Only they never ally quite shy and don't bother travelers." eyed locals did notregrethisdeparture. jumpsuit by TroppoWear from Down and catties. blobpets don't shed or leave came back." Officials are deba j ng whether to risk "Hejustcouldn'tgeta take on whars Under. But Waltune said he wouldn't untas.s puddles on floors and sidewalks. Wendy reported the group mis.sing sending another search party or to wait tas.s." said celebrated bodystylist Chaz. take hand-0uts. Th is is why many pet fanciers were when the Fizzies she had waiting for another day to see if yesterday's volun "no matter what he did. He wore the So he was asked to leave. Tonetown originally drawn to blobpets. them finally lost their bubbles. teers. or the origi ~ al four travelers, most untone shirts with ugly little em just couldn't tolerate such sartorial litter. But the evidence mounts that blob Since you can't see a thing at night return. blems on them and blue scrub pants pet owners face even bigger problems than owners of traditional pets. One blobpetter has reported a hole in his hearth so deep irs hit an underground stream. On the positive side. however, BOOM FEARED an unnamed source from out past the Wetlands - now one of the reclusive Franklin Snarl doggies. catties. and guppies." rich-says his blobpet actually struck Rumor has it that Snarl is currently oil. Purchases Choice In ne~tiating with Fast Freddie for his You wanna talk filthy lucre? Blobpets town Sites For Project ultra-tone fabu-dub. However, Fast range from 5-20 P.. depending on size, Freddie is.sued an emphatic denial. color, and personality. ofSnarl Construction 'Tm not selling out." claimed Fred Some tips on care and feeding: the Corporation die. " We were just having a ... lunch. best place to keep a blobpet is on a yeah. thars it! Lunch! We just had concrete surface- that may help curb " Location. Location. Location," lunch. " its burrowing tendencies. Franklin Snarl is quoted as saying. Concerned citizens fear a takeover Continuous feedings are just about "That's everything in real estate." by Snarl. Will it destroy the tas.snes.s the only way to keep blobpets from And "everything," it appears. is just they have worked so hard to build here excavating your house and yard. They'll what Franklin Snarl seems to want. In on the outer edge? A meeting has been eat just about anything. but their Favor addition to his recent acquisition of scheduled for the second eve of the ite snecks are aluminum. rubber, petro five downtown blocks - the absolutely Poo Pea Pet shop (Deis and all) from fingering her bulging handbag. "But triangular moon. at the Tonetown lllv leum by-products, and banana wax most tas.s section ofTonetown - Frank Madam Doople. the funny thing is. I just can't figure out erna. to d iscus.s pos.si ble action. peppers. lin Snarl has also purchased the former "He made me an ~ !fer." said Doople. what he did with all those cute little Watch this space for details. 2 Tonetown Times Wednesday July 78, 1986 From the ______Daily Horror Scope ______ Aries-The Beam in your Triangular careful. You look chewy in the massive Sagittarius -Archers love arrows. but Moon is quite unstable. Avoid the Wet jaws of a Crocogator. beware of lightning bolts. Especially EDITOR's lands. Someone-or something when your planets dance in the chevron Virgo - Your Planetary Keeper strikes a wants to douse your fire. discordant note with your House ofTone. formation . DESK 'lilurus-With the Horse in your Seventh Hope not to meet a large. strange. Capricorn-Animal lovers. be careful Star, beware offerociousdogswith giant unfriendly animal in a scary place. this time of the moon. There's a weak teeth. They'll trytochompyourhornsoff. Ubra-With your Air Planets conjunct link in your planetary thread . Gemini-Your House of l\vin Moons in the House of Infinity. don't step off Aquarius -Always the adventurer. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• is vacant today. Not a good time to any cliffs. Or does falling headlong you're willing to try anything. But purchase pets. Especially blobpets. And into a bottomless nothingness appeal remember: If you loop through a hoop Stay on the path. especially if you own linoleum. to you? let and enter another parashere. you Cancer- Your moon has declined into Scotpio-Swimming is aquatone for might never return. Preserve our woody life. the watery House of Tidal Quickmud. water signs like you. But now. while Pisces-You're ruled by your feel but Steer clear of deep beds of mushrooms.

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