The Sad Muppet Society presents... Issue 22, Spring 2005

T HE NEWSL ETTER

ST MICHAEL CALLING...

THE SAD MUPPET SOCIETY

M UPPETANIA|OPEN PLAY REPORTS|CARDIFF CARNAGE|OPEN WAR 2 40K DOUBLES REPORT|ARMIES FROM E B AY|TACTICA: DARK ELDAR Page 2 Issue 22, Spring 2005 EDITIORAL Contents (THE RAT’ S RAMBLINGS)

The Rat’s Ramblings 2 Another quarter, another starts to drum up volunteers I’m back! More rubbish Newsletter. For some for the project. Suffice to say from Chief Muppet strange reason things seem we are trying not to mention to have gotten a little busy Dam Busters anywhere near Events Diary 3 around here. Between jury this one. service, work, and Knights of In addition to all this, we are Incoming 4 the Old Republic, time has also doing more and more Regarding Retribution I’d be lying if I claimed that I been in short supply so far events with other members and The Lake of Kadrin- had made any significant year. of the Gaming Club Network Ril progress on the army Still, as I write this (the day (check page 10 to learn Muppetania or bust 5 painting front. However the after the bank holiday more about the Open Play Ian starts our first ever Order of Sanguinius, my weekend) I can safely say League in particular) and the Blood Angel’s successor I’ve managed to squeeze in plan is to also run a Club Necromunda campaign chapter, have gained 16 some painting... Four walls ‘Booth’ at Gamesday as well. First Time 6 Land Raiders… worth to be precise. Finally, after A Small Matter Jamie’s report from OK, they’re EPIC ones!!! Anyway, enough of my of Honour, our next big event Open War 2 Anyway, I hope you enjoy our moaning, what’s happening is going to be our first ever Warhammer Fantasy (late) spring Newsletter…. with the club? Herohammer 7 tournament, Regarding Daniel Gibbons gets Richard (the Rat) Kerry Well, a few of you might have noticed that little Retribution, on the 12th back in WFB after a bit Chief Muppet Warhammer 40000 November. There will be of a break tournament thing we’re more details next time once The Sabretooths 7 running (probably the day I’m I’ve prized the information from Mark’s Freeth and giving out this Newsletter). Seeing Doubles 8 Thanks to the rest of the Waple. Jamie’s adventures at committee and Nathan Anyway back to the painting. White, we’ve managed to Now let me think… what’s the Doubles tournament build enough new scenery to next? Probably the living The Birth of a New Army 9 cover more than a few room... boards (plus some new Richard Kerry Seconds Away… 10 boards as well). The plan is Chief Muppet Team Muppet’s first to retire some of the older Open Play fixture stuff to a top secret storage As always I’m on the look out against Oxford facility (known as the bin), or for more articles so if you’ve to use it for fantasy (oops, got any new rules to test out, Terminating Cardiff 12 want to review something, did I say that out loud). write a story, or have any Nick is back in Wales! Speaking of fantasy, our other interesting article in The Kabal of the Gamesday project for this mind, email me and you 13 year has now been approved might see it in here next by the powers that be, so time. Newsletter Twenty Between a Rok and a 14 expect hear the title “The Three is due out on the 5th Hard Place Lake of Kadrin-ril” whispered July so I need any articles in Mark Freeth at Spiky’s in dark corners as Dave the week beforehand at the 40K Campaign “Other Muppet” Offen-James Front cover: latest. Weekend The chapter logo of the Sabretooths The Final, Final Trials 15 THE CLUB Where there be 16 Muppet dragons... Merchandise Our third Open Play We’ve now got a club earns you the title ‘Member fixture, this time against Muppet’ and entitles you to a If anyone wants one, we can running, so what’s the deal? Spiky Club get ‘Team: Muppet’ t-shirts Well, as the main aim is just printed copy of this and polo shirts, with the to cover our running costs, Newsletter four times a year The Great eBay 17 SMS logo on the front and ‘The Meet’ on Tuesday nights plus gets you into ‘The Meet’ Experiment the Team: Muppet logo is going to cost you £2 if at member’s rates. In Matt looks online for his across the back, as you’re a member and £3 if addition to this you can join next army modelled by various folk at you’re not. Team: Muppet, for the glory the club. of, umm, Basingstoke... Your Soul Will Be Ours 18 So how do I become a Tactica: Dark Eldar from These are £15 each and member? So that’s it? available in various sizes. Mr Jenkin Sorry, this is going to cost Yep, it is. At least until we Speak to Other Muppet you more money. £5 per year change our minds... The League 2005 20 (Dave James) for more info. The NewsLetter Page 3

Coming to a Muppet EVENTS DIARY tournament near you... O R MORE OPPORTUNITIES TO SPEND MONEY FORLORN 7th May 2005 A Small Matter of Honour 05 HOPE Church Cottage, Basingstoke. See page 5 for more information. “To win is to lose, 11-12th June 2005 Pompey Pillage To lose is to Win” 40K and WFB tournament in Portsmouth. Contact [email protected] for more information. Combat Patrol with a Twist 26th June 2005 GCN Open Play Event Glebe Hall, Basingstoke. SMS plays host to Spiky Club, Oxford Gaming Club, and the Yeovil club, for three Open Play Fixtures. Speak to Richard for more info. 9-10th July 2005 Attack 2005! The Corn Exchange, Devizes and including a 40K tournament. Date: TBA 20-21st August 2005 The Albion Coast Cup Blood Bowl tournament in Southampton. See www.ascd92.dsl.pipex.com/Bloodbowl/ACC/ for more information 3-4th September 2005 Colours 2005 The normal big show in the south of England, including Spiky Club’s Starsmash tournament. 25th September 2005 Gamesday 2005 Games Workshop’s annual show, for the first time at the NEC in Birmingham. 1st October 2005 Open War 4 The 1st Company Veterans 40K, WFB, and EPIC tournament at Warhammer World in Nottingham. 12th November 2005 Regarding Retribution Our first ever Warhammer Fantasy Battle tournament...

19-20th November 2005 Warfare 2005

2005 SMS Meetings “The Meet” Glebe Hall, Church Street, Basingstoke 10 May, 24 May, 7 June, 21 June, 5 July*, 19 July, 2 August, 16 August, 30 August 13 September, 27 September, 11 October*, 25 October, 8 November, 22 November 6 December, 20 December *indicates dates the Newsletter is available

“FANTASY ..... DID SOMEBODY SAY FANTASY.... AND BACON SARNIES, I MIGHT JUST MAKE IT” Here are a couple of the models from the Oxford Gaming Club, from their visit to us on the 29th March. Money Muppet The thing of the left is from Burt Bassett’s Lost and the Damned army. Page 4 Issue 22, Spring 2005

I G AMESDAY 2005 THE LAKE OF KADRIN-RIL NCOMING

Lord Dohvan watched the it, too few by far. Dambusters… sun set over the ancient In the distance Lord Dohvan Just like the Final Trials last lake. In the distance he faintly caught the whisper of year, the core game will could make out the torches blades cutting through the involve our players taking on and fires of the ratman air. A faint simle came to the the roles of the game’s encampment. The foul old dwarf's lips. The guild heroes, as this case trying to creatures filled the valley had answered his plead. A avoid Skaven jezzails and below as far as the eye could flight of dwarven gryocopters ratling guns before defeating see. A horrible army that where on their way… the waiting Skaven horde. would soon overrun the halls It started at Gamesday last If you want to know more, or of his ancestors. year at lunchtime. Myself, help out, let Other Muppet Kadrin-Ril was only a small Dave ‘Other Muppet’ Offen- know as he’s in charge of border settlement in dwarf James and Dave Driver this one. terms. The difficult approach where pondering various had kept the city secret and Richard Kerry ideas for another game, a Major Muppet safe for more than an age. fantasy game. But their where too few of the longbeards left to defend I will only mention the original idea once… The

26TH JUNE 2005 OPEN PLAY EVENT DAY

The local scout group from Reading, and the Yeovil games will be 1500 point whom’s hall we use have Wargaming Club will be Warhammer 40000 games kindy let us take over for playing no less than six and the doors will open from Sunday the 26th June in individual Open Play fixtures. 10:00am. Let me know if you order to cause mayhem. That’s a total of fifteen want to take part as soon as Over the course of the day, games per club. possible. ourselves, the Oxford With the exception of the Richard Kerry Gaming Club, Spiky Club SMS/OGC fixture, all the Team Muppet, Muppet

12TH NOVEMBER 2005 REGARDING RETRIBUTION

For centuries the prize had of all other races for eternity. would have rules though; been hidden and safely these will ensure that truly, They came from far and guarded by the ancients, near, from the Icy wastes of only the best would win. now there was but one and Kislev and the Chaos Wastes The finest knights of the she sensed her life force was to the steaming Jungles of Empire and Brettonia, slipping away, her arcane Lustria, fair Maidens of stalwart Dwarves from their powers which had aided in Brettonia and the Boorish mountain holds, the it’s concealment were Orcs from the Wastelands. Lizardmen from their jungle waning. Something needed ziggurat’s, elegant Elven High Elf Princes, Dwarf to be done, but what? There nobles with their retinues. Kings, Demons and Warlords was no choice but to offer Chaos warlords and their all seek the famed prize, the this to the greatest race in warbands, menacing Skaven Chalice of Perdition. There the known world. A and the sinister Dark Elves, are those that crave its Hi all, this is a bit of a new tournament would be called, Orcs and Goblins, Giants, power while equally there column here to keep you invites were offered, Ogres all are coming… good folk abreast with all the challenges issued and are those who would thwart little projects going on at the threats made, there can only these attempts at supreme For their will be…ONLY ONE! club. be the one victor, the one power. All races are Mark Freeth gathered onto the plains of So watch out, there’s true hero to hold the power Fantasy Muppet Ostland, the tournament INCOMING... and suffer the subservience The NewsLetter Page 5

S UMMER 2005 NECROMUNDA CAMPAIGN ONCE UPON A TIME IN M UPPETANIA

Say, you must be new to these parts. Well if ya want to know the lowdown on what’s happening in Muppetania, I’m yer man. Folks round here call me Blakey, or One-Arm Blake, cos of havin’ only the one arm, see?. I ain’t good for much since a ripperjack took me shootin’ arm, but I gets by. I makes it my bizness to keep up with all that’s worth knowin’ in these parts, and let me tell you – there’s plenty goin’ on right now. Ever since the hive quake opened up a crack in the dome wall, bad sorts have been creeping into Necromunda is GW’s Muppetania from the badlands, stirrin’ up a bit of trouble. Here in Muppetville we’ve had it easy shirmish version of since anyone can remember. Folks here are used to the quiet life, and we do alright – the ole Warhammer 40000, and is factory keeps on churning out its widgets, and the guilders come by to collect their share every so now available as a free often, and that’s the way things are. But now we got us some trouble makers. download from the Specialist The word is out that there’s easy pickings in Muppetania, and now there’s a bunch of gangs holed Games website: up outside Muppetville. Mostly they fight between themselves, and that’s how we like it. I www.specialist-games.com happened to witness a big ole scrap between a bunch of ‘em – from what I could make out, it were Van Saars, Delaques and Eschers, maybe another one as well, but I was keepin’ my head well down. Well to stop things getting’ out of hand the Mayor let the word go round that the gangs could have the land outside the Muppetville limits to carry out their business, but if they caused trouble in town or interfered with the Guilders then there would be hell to pay. Yes siree. We even got us some Enforcers sent down with shiny new guns and armour, and even if I had two good arms I wouldn’t want to cross one of those boys. But some of them new gangs have got big ideas of their own. I know it, cos I happen to be close personal friends of a couple of gangers, and I can tell you – things are gonna get mighty interestin’ round here sometime soon. Buy me another bottle of hooch and I might even let you in on a few secrets – but you didn’t hear it from me, right?

The start of a Necromunda which campaign Muppetville Deep within the Hive Primus depends for on the planet of its wealth Necromunda lies and Muppetania Dome. For survival. generations the dome has The been a peaceful place – as remainder peaceful as things ever get of the dome in the underhive. The only is a no- entrances to the dome have mans land been heavily fortified, giving of crumbling the hivers within some structures measure of security from the and less salubrious inhabitants bubbling of the underhive. However, a sludge recent hive quake has lakes, opened a breach in the populated dome wall, leading to a by a mix of desolated region of the underhive known as the badlands. It hasn’t taken long for word of the new entrance to Muppetania to adventurous and desperate land of Muppetania spread through the settlers. everything is up for grabs – underhive, and gangs The gangs who arrive in all that’s needed is a strong looking for new turf to settle Muppetania must carve out resolve, a sure aim, and “all that’s needed is a have been making their way a territory for themselves, plenty of luck. Who will rise through the badlands to imposing themselves upon to become top dog in strong resolve, a sure Muppetania. the locals while defending Muppetania? aim, and plenty of At the centre of Muppetania themselves from the other Ian Westmoreland is the town of Muppetville, gangs in the area and Underhive Scum Muppet luck” home to the Guilder families avoiding the attention of the and hivers who work in the mayor of Muppetville and the factories and synth-farms on Enforcers. In the no-mans Page 6 Issue 22, Spring 2005

FIRST TIME… 1ST COMPANY VETERANS OPEN TOURNAMENT II

went. deployments on both sides, storm of 1s and 2s that I He deployed first and started off we went. managed to roll while trying very aggressively with the After a few turns of long to hit, wound or damage deployment of a couple of range firing, punctuated by anything and hence he had Talos’ (Talosses? Taloi?) and my armoured fist squad plenty of nasty troops left a nasty looking Archon with grabbing cover by an when he hit my lines. I’d been told that you always retinue of power weapon objective, the rough riders Well, suffice to say, he remember your first time, wielding looneys. I deployed dithering aimlessly and a destroyed everything on my and I certainly won’t forget fairly far back, with my battle cannon shot of mine right flank and in the centre my first visit to the Mecca of veterans deploying in taking out four grey knights and I destroyed everything Warhammer related different table quarters to try from a squad of five, his he had on my left flank with activities (Warhammer and spread my troops out, Eversor assassin charged in my veterans. My ogryns World) to play in a whilst still retaining density and made mincemeat of one covered themselves in glory, tournament. of fire. of my guard units. Not to but once again, my rough The first question of whether The Dark Eldar pressed miss the chance to use their riders proved ineffective in I would get a painted army of forward and, well, given my shiny powerfists, in charged combat, but at least I got 1,500 points of the Savlar inaccurate shooting, they the command unit and them into combat this time I Chem Dogs together was just kept coming. I managed finished the assassin. I only suppose….. The end of the solved at approximately to do some damage to them, learned later that the Eversor battle saw the two units of midnight on the Friday night but after my rough riders had should have “exploded” after veterans sat in his before the tournament, when launched a pre-emptive dying, but my opponent deployment zone, after I decided enough was strike, done only a little forgot about it and so the they’d done sterling work enough and gave up and damage and then run away, command squad ended taking out the Leman Russ went to bed. only my Ogryns and being heroic instead of battle tank, well away from Getting up at Crazy o’clock command squad festooned dead….. the green hordes who had the next morning to wait for with power fists were left to Then, the grey knight invaded my deployment Richard, Nick and Mark damage the Talos. They soon terminators appeared and zone. Well, looks like they Freeth to arrive wasn’t too solved that situation by chewed their way through a didn’t get to being veterans tough and was certainly running away and dying couple of my squads and I by being stupid and putting easier than it had been for respectively…. managed to leave the rough themselves in the line of fire at any point! Nick and Mark, who I believe So without further ado, the riders in charge range of his had to get up at a time that splinter cannon armed grey knight dreadnought, And so, with a major loss, the was still technically scourges joined in the fun who charged them and then last of my games ended. yesterday in order to get to and let’s just say it didn’t they ran away (I’m sensing a Funny though it might sound, Nottingham for the take me long to pack the theme with these fellas….). I’d had a really good day and registration time. remains of my army away at After the dust settled and we three excellent games Much fun ensued on the the end of the game. My dice called time, we’d managed against good fun opponents journey up, although it all rolling during the game was to get a draw, and with only who were reasonable with all proved a little too much for so unfortunate, my opponent 100 points separating us, rules queries that cropped Mark, who drifted in and out kept apologising to me for although I was on the losing up during the games and of slumber as we my dice rolls, which isn’t end. Still, heartened by this helped the spirit of the game approached Nottingham, something you see every improvement in fortunes, I along no end. apparently to keep himself game! got ready for my third and All that was then left was the fresh for the fighting ahead. Still, I was heartened to see final game of the day. final placings and awards. Or that was his story that Nick and Mark Freeth I was pleased to hear that Coming in 30th out of 32 anyway…… had very kindly got my next opponent was an was probably just reward for Still, when we got there, a massacred in their games as Ork army which Richard had my performance and it plentiful supply of coffee and well (in order to keep me just massacred, so I thought helped cancel out Richard’s doughnuts for breakfast company so they claimed) I’d do okay (just remind me, excellent 3rd place showing! (healthy, nutritious and full and so off we trudged for what is it “pride cometh” Still, a good day out was of caffeine, just what a body lunch knowing we’d be off to before ?). certainly had and I can needs!) pepped everybody the lower tables after eating. Anyway, he had a couple of recommend tournaments back up and in we went to The organisers had very large foot-slogging units, a held in the Warhammer find our opponents and first kindly kept us apart as we units of Nobs in a truck, a World hall as the scenery table. were from the same club, so unit of trukkboyz, some of was top quality and the My first opponent was Sam we ended up lined up on the the fast things sprinkled overall atmosphere was from the Gobstyks club. He bottom three tables and I around all Ork armies, a unit really good (and I managed had a very infantry-centric was facing a Daemonhunter of Kans and a looted Leman to avoid spending a fortune Dark Eldar army and we were army with inducted imperial Russ. in the shop as well!). told the first game was to be guard. Seize and control was He advanced over the table Jamie Morton Cleanse. Strange though it the name of the game and with everything he had and ChemDog Muppet may sound, I hadn’t played after placing the markers managed to weather the Cleanse before so off we and with fairly conservative The NewsLetter Page 7

less impressive model being HEROHAMMER? used in his place. On the other hand, my general is a gaunt fellow in a cape, riding a colourfully It wasn't like this in the back characters would be able to in the next game he was decorated horse and carrying in the good old days with take on a whole unit of most fried by a vile Skaven a rather plain lance. Maybe Warhammer, when lone races' elites and come out weapon after humiliatingly for Evan to get the respect characters were truly a force on top. proving himself unable to he deserves I should replace to be reckoned with. The first So, ten years later, I still wound mere rat swarms the model. I'm thinking I'll time I faced my best mate's haven't been able to work several times. His horse maybe use Mannfred von Undead army led by Nagash, out whether or not if it was a even did better than he did! Carstein's model. Oh yes, I can't remember what was stroke of tactical genius that I think the appearance of a and mounted on a Winged worse, the horrible model made Tony decide to have character has got to have Nightmare, just for that extra released for the Lord of his Stegadon flee when my something to do with it. old-school ultimate killing Undeath himself, or the modern-day Vampire Count When Richard got out his power. Of course, under my massively overpowering general charged at him, Deathmaster Snikch model, I command he'd probably just rules which governed him. resulting in the beast being was not happy at the make a more tempting Nothing in my entire skewered and killed as it ran, prospect of facing this target, but the good thing greenskin horde could touch with the charge being creature, and even when about commanding the him, and my friend tried to redirected into a nasty unit reassured that he was just a Undead is that when your decide that we were going to of Lizardman warriors. Poor regular Assassin, I did my guys are killed, you know play until one army was old Evan von Carstein didn't best to keep out of his way death is never the end… completely wiped out (I gave even last one turn against throughout our battle, when I Daniel Gibbons up by about turn 15). But them, and it was all downhill may have had a unit go up (Un)dead Muppet even then, many regular for my army from there. Then against him directly with a

A SMALL MATTER OF HONOUR 05 THE SABRETOOTHS

Night was falling and soon gleamed orange as the sun desperate times called for the call to arms would come. slowly set on the distant desperate measures. The But until then Jorrell could horizon. Sabretooths were still very rest. Jorrell’s thoughts focused on short of support vehicles, His beloved First Company, the dangers of the night to and so several banks of the “Sand kings” stood come. The clues were there teleporters had been hastily ready. All the available waiting to be discovered, set up well away from the Dave “Other Muppet” Offen- Terminator armour had been ancient writings lost amongst battle line. From here the James’ Sabretooths Space mustered and soon they the ruins. The war zone was “Sand Kings” would stab at Marines have been in the would wreak vengeance on awash with heavy terrain, the very heart of their foes. making for the last couple of the heretic masses. and hazards of every kind. Jorrell gazed back at the years, however, ASMOH 05 will their first tournament He walked slowly past the His solution was unorthodox Termite as Commander mighty Termite transport that in the extreme. But Celabus and his Veteran outing. Command Squad clambered I’ve played this army, its not aboard their tunnelling nice, but at least it doesn’t leviathan. have four Land Raiders. On the hill, far above, Richard Kerry Gladiator Regent Thorbious Major Muppet urged on his Tenth Company scout squad. He took one last look at the Sabretooth Chapter Banner, as it fluttered high above Command HQ. His grip flexed around the teleport homer in his right hand and then he was out of sight, as his scout contingent moved silently on into the sinking twilight. “Tonight the Heretics will burn.”

Dave’s Termite emerging in the middle of Matt Pinto’s eldar Dave Offen-James Page 8 Issue 22, Spring 2005

SEEING DOUBLES WARHAMMER 40K DOUBLES TOURNAMENT

Now the rules for the all of the opposing army was Necrons. Both armies were doubles tournament are like pinned or fleeing by their first the same with one unit of this: Both players take a 400 turn. The game didn’t really necrons, a couple of point combat patrol list and get any better for them after skimmer necrons and a play against another pair for that and we comfortably won skimmer necron with a las- nine games over a weekend. the game by a massacre. cannon. This was the only A while ago, I decided to I wasn’t due to see Simon This shot us up the tables bad table I played on as their enter the WH40k doubles before the event, so we and after a break to grab side had a line of cover and tournament in Nottingham agreed to pick our forces and another coffee and get to the ours had absolutely none! at the GWHQ and I decided just turn up and use them! I shop, we found ourselves They simply sat behind the that it will be a great chance had the trusty (?!) Savlar against a combined guard/ cover and as we advanced to meet up with one of my Chem dogs Imperial Guard sisters of battle army. The (the mission was take and old school friends (Simon) and Simon brought Biel-Tan guard were all deep striking hold), popped out and shot who lives in Manchester as Eldar. through the use of us. And when we shot them, this meant we could meet My army consisted of an tunnelliers (!) and the sisters they just got back up again. up without either of us armoured fist squad, a small started the game on the So, off we went down the travelling the length of the unit of veterans, some board. The men of the game tables after a very one sided whole country... ratlings and my rough riders. were definitely my rough massacre. His consisted of a couple of riders, who managed to be Next up were an chaos units of three Reapers, a standing in just the right slaanesh marine/dark eldar biggish unit of striking place, so that a platoon combo and off we went. scorpions and some rangers. command squad and Well, the dark eldar shot Simon also brought a couple platoon squad managed to over to our side of the table of mates down who had a scatter onto them, thus with their transports, wyches guard/space marine drop destroying the opponents’ got out and saw off the troop combination (with the units! This left our opponents striking scorpions as they space marine assault squad a bit under-strength and we rolled a ten for their break deep striking). We all met up managed to get another test after losing the fight by in Nottingham on the Friday massacre, so it was off up one! Still, we dealt with them evening and went out for a the tables again! and then over came two bite to eat and a few beers, Another short break later we units of furies (I only realised as that was bound to help us were playing against a afterwards that this was an play better the next day…… double Tau army with lots of illegal list as both the chaos …….Groggily dragging myself crisis suits and two units of marine units had the mark of into consciousness the next fire warriors. Well, the fire Slaanesh, thus making them day, I realised that maybe, warriors got shot up pretty elites and the furies were just maybe, all those pints quickly (by my imperial guard fast attack, thus no troops weren’t going to help me be no less, huzzah!) but the choices…) and finished us off a better general after all! crisis suits jumped all over along with a beastmaster Undeterred, we set off for the place and gave us with his warp beasts. So, GWHQ. The coffee and problems trying to winkle once more down the tables doughnuts laid on helped me them out. The man of the we tumbled! get back to reality and off we match was the lone survivor Still, it was time to leave for went for our first game, a of my armoured fist unit, who the evening, so off we went take and hold the centre of managed to get behind the to drown our sorrows after a the table game against a wreckage of his Chimera to day that was definitely a day double space marine army. stop the Tau killing him and of two halves! The marines set up mainly in getting all the points for the So, bright and breezy (well, it cover, as did we and we won unit! This left us with a draw was bright outside anyway) the roll for first turn. It was at and we moved to the table we wandered into the hall to this point that I realised why above for the next game! carry on where we had left the Dark Reapers are called Now, not to spoil the rest of off. Unfortunately, we took Reapers, as the article, but being on that a little too literally and they table four truly was the high lost to a marine/guard army, proceeded to watermark of the weekend despite destroying all of the reap the with regards where we guard, when the marine land marine ranks ended up. Those of a speeder tornadoes (two of pretty nervous disposition should them with seven shots each, sharpish. My avert their eyes from the rest four of them rending. Ouch!) ratlings also of this article as it involves a took out most of our army got into the lot of Guard and Eldar piece by piece. action and deaths…… Still, undeterred, we were up pretty much Next up were double against a double witch- The NewsLetter Page 9

hunter army played by none riders then ran away and the can’t remember the game the other side and we came other than GW staffer Owen Eversor came too close to I’ve missed, so apologies to out with a minor victory. Rees and one of his mates the edge of the woods, so our opponents in that game, So, a good end to an who has had his armies the reapers took his last but I just can’t remember enjoyable weekend. The best appear in White Dwarf. wound away. We managed to you!) thing about Doubles Needless to say, their army get a minor loss, due in no ….against another marine/ tournaments are that you was absolutely stunning, so part to the last turn heroics guard combo. This was the have somebody on your side it was with heavy hearts we of the reapers, who first time I’d seen a to commiserate after your started trying to destroy it! destroyed an entire unit of character in a game, and it losses and the whole thing The funniest moment of the six seraphim with six shots! proved to be a poor choice was played in a great spirit game was when the rough Thank goodness they’d used as the scorpions killed the as opposed to being overly riders charged in at an up their faith points earlier…. marine captain on turn two competitive. Eversor assassin, missed all So, on with the last game… after he leapt out of his of their attacks with the Now all I need to do is get (Now, the observant razorback! Still, a long range 500 points together for the lances and the sarge only firefight developed on one took one wound off the amongst you will note that Warhammer doubles in July! this is only game number side of the board, while the assassin, thanks to it’s scorpions did their thing on Jame Morton invulnerable save! The rough eight. Try as I might, I just Chem Dog Muppet

L ETTERS FROM GLEBE THE BIRTH OF A NEW ARMY

Arch Vizier Karvaz stared out stalked by, the eyeslits in it's continued. across the barren landscape headpiece glowing from "You will travel east... the of Thor's Hammer, taking in within indicating the life- bodies of your men are the rugged hills through giving presence of the the needed... when the time which his warband were daemon bound within the comes... be ready to serve making their way. The stony engine. Karvaz drew a small me... and my followers... this ground glistened with vial from within his robes is my will... do you accept moisture from a recent and uncorked it, taking a sip your fate?" Sorceror, sending him the storm, and ragged of the precious liquid within. souls of thousands of Karvaz nodded again, stormclouds still lingered, He sighed as the elixir took sacrificed innocents. shuddering. He slowly made ruddy by the rising effect, allowing his thoughts Karvaz snapped back to sun. His small band of a moment to drift back to a opened his mouth to talk through chattering teeth. attention. He had lingered Thousand Sons were memory from eleven days too long, caught up in the advancing towards a position before. "Yes Great One. But... I have promise of future glory and which had recently been The Changelord had come orders... from Ahriman -" neglecting his present vacated by a Dark Angels while he was in the "Ahriman is a fool!" the being duties. The Dark Angels had force which was in the area. Dreamtrance, completing his interrupted. "Ahriman is... of still to be dealt with. With the They had been driven off by ritual of devotion to the no consequence. This is my captured stronghold under a cadre of Iron Warriors Great Sorceror and will... the Ways have been his control, he would have a which Karvaz and his band revitalizing his psychic spirit. revealed... you shall travel base from which to build his had been shadowing for Suddenly he had found east... and assist the Ork strategy, and where he months now. It now seemed himself in a maelstrom of things." would be safe from the obvious that their target was swirling energy, where he At that, the vision had faded. attentions of the cursed the rich Imperial planet of was confronted by a beaked Karvaz had gone over the Imperial thugs. Glebe, since they had visage of fearsome memory many times since departed shortly after the Suddenly a voice invaded his proportions. Even though he then, during the journey to defeat of the Dark Angels. thoughts "They come..." recognised the being as a this sector in the wake of the Karvaz had arrived at Thor's Almost immediately he heard Changelord, he recoiled in massive Ork Waaagh which Hammer not long after the a distant whine, growing horror expecting his soul to had ignited just as his force battle, but was aware that louder. A speck in the be swallowed as the cruel- had arrived. The massive the stubborn Space Marines distance increased in size, looking beak opened. wave of greenskins had were still in the area and revealing the form of a Land Instead, the being emitted a struck against the defenders would pose a threat to his Speeder. He saw movement weird high pitched keening of the Imperial planets, ambitions as soon as they to the side, as figures in as its head turned from side leaving a trail of devastation had regrouped - hence his green power armour moved to side, each eye regarding in its path. The destiny of his careful scrutiny of the out from behind the cover of him in turn. Thousand Sons was assured surrounding landscape. a scree-covered bluff. "You are Karvaz. You worship - they would attack the With an unconcious me... your soul is mine... to Imperium, bringing death to As the first bolter shots rang out Karvaz soared across his command, the Arch Vizier command." the despised enemies of his steered his Disk-steed to the warband, preparing his Karvaz could say nothing. God. Once Thor's Hammer side of the trail they were had been secured, the way troops. The time had come to following, settling to the His jaw was clenched in fear. serve his new Lord and see He managed to nod his would be open to advance ground beyong the choking on Glebe where Karvaz his destiny manifest. clouds of dusk thrown up by head, hoping that it would be enough of a sign of his would perform a glorious Ian Westmoreloand the marching of his minions. diabolical rite to the Great Dusty Muppet He watched as the Defiler submission. The being Page 10 Issue 22, Spring 2005

SECONDS AWAY, ROUND ONE! TEAM MUPPET GOES TO OXFORD

It was all Mike Sharp’s fault1. where set against some With only the crisis suits with Back in October last year, rather nasty Chaos guys. their plasma weapons to Mike cornered myself and Dave McCoy’s Sisters had an threaten the terminators, the Sean Curtis at Gamesday to Ulthwé Eldar army in front of rest of my army got on with fix a date for the three clubs him, and my Tau would be the job of trying to kill some to kick-off the 2005 GCN facing a Dark Angel’s army normal marines. In Open Play League season in belonging to a guy named particular, hiding in the The Gaming Club the south of England. Matt. forest on the left there was a Network Open Through a quick bit of Okay, I probably should have unit with a lascannon and Play League is deduction, we decided the suspected something was up plasma gun, plus a unit of envisioned as a 14th February probably when Matt suggested playing scouts. They had to go. competitive won’t be popular with our an Omega level mission.7 The kroot had moved from structure to get all the better halves, so on the Escalation, my favourite behind their woodland, into various member clubs following Monday, the 21st, scenario special rule; not. it, and put in the first volley. visiting and playing each Team Muppet2 headed into So, with the exception of Followed by both units of other. In the process the wilds of Oxfordshire3, anything that can infiltrate, pathfinders and the stealth hopefully making new friends racing up the A34 directly or has the scout ability, suits. Despite the amount of and having a lot of fun. from our various places of everything else in their nice firepower only three of the For each fixture, a club employment.4 shiny tanks stayed in brutes went down, leaving supplies 3 to 5 players for Despite my attempts to lose reserve. Umm, and that two left, including that one system. both Mr Freeth, and Mr would be an (almost) all lascannon. Each club plays as many Jenkin between the Milton infantry Dark Angel’s army The two hammerhead tanks fixtures they want to during Interchange services and lined up on the board. had a similar amount of the course of the year Oxford, and with a bit of Bugger. success, dropping two big against the other clubs in the guidance from Dave5; we Matt won the roll-off for the templates onto a unit league, and a winning club is managed to get parked up in first turn and kindly let me go covering the middle of the crowned for each system Oxford City Centre, and after first, mainly on the grounds board. Three out of the five (presently Warhammer Mark’s protests about the my entire army was hidden perished, but again the 40000, Warhammer Fantasy snow6, we even managed to behind one bit of woodland. lascannon was still there. To Battle, and Lord of the Rings) get into the Oxford Games Stealth suits bounced out, my amazement, the crisis at the end of the year. Workshop a few minutes unloaded their twenty shots suits managed to hit the before they closed! into the closest squad of terminators in front of them After the Oxford guys had a terminators, hit most of but alas, Matt managed to bit of fun trying them, wounded most of pass his invulnerable saves. (unsuccessfully) to getting them, and killed nobody. Still, at least we managed to into their hall, the ever Sensing a likely degree of kill stuff that turn, now I just resourceful Mr Sharp retribution they ‘bonged’ had to sit through Matt’s managed to secure an straight back behind the shooting… alternative venue. Thirty trees. With the exception of his minutes later and after much Matt’s first turn was only terminators and a couple of apologising from our hosts, slightly more successful. newly arrived land speeders, we were in business. With only the stealth suits in Matt decided to remain in Nick Jenkin’s Deathwing view, his entire army manage place and crack the vehicles army would be facing Witch to roll 21” to spot them.8 with those heavy weapons. Hunters. Mark Freeth’s Bugs Unfortunately only the Unfortunately for him his terminator squad was luck completely deserted actually within 21”. A couple him in his shooting phase. of assault cannons later and Lots of hits but nothing could the drone and a suit not penetrate my armour, and to quite behind the woods were cap it all, one of the toast. First blood to the lascannons was two inches home team. out of range. Out of one Turn two, ah ha, now I could round of shooting Matt roll for reserves. In possibly managed to stun one the luckiest set of reserve devilfish and kill three kroot. rolls I have ever attempted, Various members of the First my entire army turned this Naval Cadre looked up turn! However despite the amazed to see their forces mission’s title, Seek and pretty much intact. Destroy, Aun’O Tsua’m Turn three and with most of decided that concentrating Matt’s army on the board The First Naval Cadre demonstrating combat potential concentration, our forces on the left flank this turn was going to be or hiding was the way to go.9 critical for the Tau. First The NewsLetter Page 11

would be the last turn. The Teams Notes The speeder that had The actual TEAM MUPPET 1 For those who have no system used for been stunned all game Richard Kerry Nick Jenkin Dave McCoy finally blew up whilst the idea whom I’m talking the Open about, Mike Sharp is the League has drones blasted the Mark Freeth Mark Waple Chairman of the Gaming charged slightly assault cannon from its counterpart. The Club Network and the Ox- this first fixture. ford Wargaming Club. So rather than using set teams such as Team: Muppet which went to Pathfinders continued Oxford, each club is entered into the League for either Lord of the their orderly retreat from 2 Myself, Nick Jenkin, Mark Rings, Warhammer 40000, or Warhammer Fantasy Battle (or any two the big scary guys in (almost Conqueror of Car- or all three). This is much better as anyone can fight for the glory of terminator armour, diff) Freeth, and Dave whilst the squad that their club in the league depending upon availability etc, etc. McCoy had moved onto the hill If anyone’s interested in the exact workings of the Open Play League, 3 North of the M4, where got wiped out by the there be dragons. wants to see how the teams are doing, or even look through the remaining hammerhead 4 Nick wins the dedication various team challenges, check out the GCN ‘Magazine’ website at and the crisis battlesuits. www.gcnm.org.uk trophy, working in South- With little visible, Matt ampton. used his terminators and priority, kill terminators, or much to Matt’s glee one of last land speeder to finish off 5 Who was in a pub. least make them angry those remaining lascannons the four drones buzzing 6 Apparently he thought he enough to chase after my found and then penetrated a around in his last turn, should have brought a crisis battlesuits. The last hammerhead, only to stun however at the end of the coat… thing we needed was two the crew... day it was a solid win for the 7 In fairness we did roll for terminator units on the main Turn four. After surviving Tau. it. Stupid dice. :) body of my army. Second another round of shooting priority, finish off units: Overall the fixture was a 8 Stealth suits are always and being charged by a man draw with two wins each, targeted as per the Night where possible I needed to with a big pointy stick10, my with myself and Nick both Fighting rules, which is nice. fully remove the squads boys were looking good at which had taken casualties winning our games, and 9 Especially as all my rule this point. Unfortunately Dave McCoy’s Exorcist the turn before. books, causalities, and those remaining gunners going back into 11 other junk had filled the Matt had very kindly moved terminators where getting basic training. that second terminator close, so it was time for the right-hand corner of the squad within rapid fire range Pathfinders to pull back a Many thanks to Mike Sharp board. Oh, and there were of the crisis suits so up they bit. As it happened this left and the boys from Oxford for those three lascannons as popped, and down a couple one unit that could only putting on a great night of well… of terminators went. target Matt’s chapter master. gaming. I for one, can’t wait 10 Read: a Chapter Master Opposite the kroot, the two Despite the terminator for the return leg... in terminator armour with a marines and the scout had armour, the pulse carbines Richard Kerry sword of secrets. Thankfully to go. The kroot and stealth managed to inflict a wound! Team Muppet he was charging one of the suits removed the marines, In the middle of the table, Devilfish.

whilst three seeker missiles the second unit of 11 And is it that everyone landed on the scouts, terminators, who had gone except me can make 2+ finishing them. The last after the crisis suits, where save??? seeker missile managed to finally wiped out by massed Seconds Away, Round Two stun one of the speeders, plasma fire. The return leg against the Oxford 12 Or floating. whilst the heroes of the day, Unfortunately the two Gaming Club was played at 13 This unit being equipped two gun drones from one of hammerheads succeeded in Glebe Hall on the 29th March. with a heavy bolter rather the pathfinder’s devilfish, killing absolutely nothing this Suffice to say it hurt, a lot. In than a lascannon. managed blow up the other turn, although one of the order to get as many people from one! devilfish did down a speeder. SMS involved in the League as possible, only one member of With our shooting and ‘bong’ With drones and other the original Team: Muppet, Mr McCoy took part in this fixture. Alongside Dave, the brothers Driver, Paul ‘Money Muppet’ moves done, it was Matt’s nasties running12 his turn. On the right-hand side backlines, Matt’s middle Russell, and Blair were Team: Muppet for the night. of the board his two other marine squad finally broke Mike Sharp’s battle against little (!) Andy Driver showed how marine squads broke cover cover obviously aiming to kill well the evening went for our guys. First turn and Andy’s determined at least to get something in this game apart Vindicator was a smoking wreck and despite immobilised two that lascannon in range of from kroot.13 our his own tanks, Mike’s Space Wolves ran over the Dark something. Again with fairly Angel’s in pretty quick fashion. limited targets, but at least Much to Matt’s relief, his Things went a bit better for Paul, until an Avatar with a hell of a one fresh land speeder, Matt shooting actually do lot of Guardians, a Seer Council, and a Wraithlord, steamed proceeded to plough something in his turn, through his evil pixies. everything he could into my downing a devilfish and then vehicles and then the kroot. one of the hammerheads. He The same story was repeated on both Daves’ boards, whilst Thankfully most of the also tried out those assault Blair was at the steep end of a learning curve with his Orks assault cannon rounds cannons against a pathfinder getting shot to pieces by a Crimson Fists army. bounced, however after squad, half of which However, despite our five - nil defeat, everybody did enjoy losing five more of their promptly perished. themselves, so mission accomplished. Turn five. As it was getting friends, the kroot decided to Watch it Oxford, next time we’ll unleash the Pinto!!! bug out and go home. And late, we decided turn five Page 12 Issue 22, Spring 2005

TERMINATING CARDIFF C ARDIFF CARNAGE 2005

Raider Crusader. The Assault Cannon Dread anything that happened on We had some decent took out a Land Speeder and the second day was going to moments where the was causing terrible trouble be a bonus. Chaplain refused to die, even with that rending ability. The Day two brought the 13th to lascannons, as he Crusader charged across the Company screaming towards charged around killing board into his quarter and me. They’re a bit mean you guardsmen left, right and lost several weapons but know? This was a fun game was still a mobile vehicle. The third visit to a Cardiff centre. He did go down that involved much tactical Carnage then for this finally to sheer weight of Excellent! manoeuvring, assault particular Muppet and numbers. My hand to hand At the end of the game we’d cannons, missile launchers, having come third and then combat squad leapt out of taken one quarter, held our plenty of 2+ saves and a second on my two previous the Crusader at one point own quarter and were Gate power that annoyed my visits I was obviously gunning and were promptly charged contesting the other two Crusader driver. for first this time! by Rough Riders (yes, I’d (including his). Victory points As he is, essentially, an came out to 1642 to 682. A Or not. This is me we’re forgotten they get Fleet of assaulty army we surprised tournament pointing of 25-7. talking about and this Hoof) and, next thing you the hell out of him by driving A good solid victory, helped competitive stuff is a little know, we’ve all been killed right at him and assaulting because he didn’t realise lost on me and this year I’ve by their exploding lances! him! The Long Fangs died how shooty an army of decided to take my lesser Ouch. Big time. very quickly, his commander terminators can be. I love used armies to tournaments We totted everything up and got himself involved and to see if I can actually win a I surprised myself as it rending. then the Wulfen charged. game here and there with hadn’t been a complete The third game ended up Unfortunately for him my 2+ them. By lesser I mean massacre: He had 2,145 VP being the exact opposite. saves were up to scratch (we Daemonhunters, Witch and I had 1,346. Converting Necrons. Recon. 2,000 survived 17 wounds or Hunters and the Deathwing. that to tournament points points. I think I managed to something equally silly!) and Therefore, since I needed gave 23-9 to Steve. A fun make every mistake under then we struck back. His 2000 points, Cardiff was game as we tried to stop the sun for this one. I commander died. Wulfen about to receive a visit by the getting shot at by heaps and allowed myself to be taken were ripped furry limb from Deathwing. heaps of guardsmen. out unit by unit and just furry limb and so on. couldn’t kill anything in his The weekend started with a So, on to the second game Meanwhile his Priest chap phalanx. We ended up draw for the first round. Out on table six. This one was at was having a deep think over having to charge the popped my name first and 1500 points and this time the other side of the Monolith but couldn’t bring it then a chap by the name of the Ultramarines arrived for battlefield but couldn’t Steve Butler. Now, anyone a bit of Cleanse. His army down! remember where he’d put who’s been paying attention was mainly shooty with a Things were so bad that we his shopping list. He also over the last few years to the Veteran Unit and Chaplain in even managed to immobilise managed to fail a psychic ramblings of Team:Muppet a Rhino. This unit became our own Crusader through test at the same time. So the will have come across this my must kill as I didn’t want difficult terrain. Not a good big unit of Grey Slayers stood name before. Usually that lot getting re-rolls and game and we were soundly around with him for a while. followed by the words the rest as they charged into beaten as I failed to get Eventually he did remember massacred by or scraped a my Termies! anything into his deployment how to do it and scattered draw or something similar! Oddly enough he helped me zone and he got a lot of stuff within 6” of the rear of my I was about to face his 2000 out on this requirement. The into mine. Crusader! With a Meltagun. point Imperial Guard army board had a nice large piece We killed a grand total of five Bang!!!!! Lots of fire and starring more guardsmen of cover in the centre which Necrons and the Scarabs. brimstone. Not pretty. By the than you can shake a stick allowed my army to deploy in That was it. We lost end we could have won if the at. I was outnumbered by hiding. He then charged his everything except the Priest chap had failed an something like 10-1 in Rhino around the terrain and Chaplain and his squad of invulnerable save from a figures!! It was time to suck it piled out. This unit was scary termies who couldn’t do missile launcher but it was in and play with the big boys. but was now completely anything ‘cos they were not to be and a losing draw miles away after the was had by me. Far too many Essentially Steve was moving isolated and right in front of points tied up in that his guard around on my army. We leapt out of the Crusader did its track Crusader so when it went Warhammer movement trays Crusader ready to charge throwing trick in the rocks. so he obviously wasn’t any survivors and then let fly We had 394 VP to his 1672. pop it cost us big time! worried about casualties and with everything. As the A 26-6 Victory for the So the final game beckoned I can see why. No matter smoke cleared the Chaplain Necrons. One day I’ll beat and my 2000 points of how many I killed there stood there alone, with one the Necrons. I will…. raging terminator hormones always seemed to be more of wound left. Nice. So my prepared to faith the wrath commander charged him So day one ended and I had them – worse than Zulu. In managed to lose two of the of some Iron Warriors. These summary it was a take and and used the Sword of were Iron Warriors with lots Secrets to good effect, three games. Still, we’d hold mission and the only achieved our target of and lots of big guns! This slicing the Chaplain in two. thing I had left at the end of winning one game so was to involve loot counters the game was the Land After that it just got better. and with only three on the The NewsLetter Page 13

board they were worth a have picked mine and Paul’s well. The survivors now faced near and the third objective whopping 666 points each!! jaws off the floor. a trek across open ground we were about equidistant He put down a Land Raider My turn and we decided not towards the Assault Cannon on. (with a squad of combat to take any more chances! Dreadnought; it was going to The key though was the nutters in it), a Defiler, a Racing forward my Chaplain be a long day. Chaplain. In that final round Basilisk and a Predator as and his assault terminator His turn and he surprised me a Defiler shell landed, but his heavies and then six squad (four pairs of by not assaulting his diverted off. A Basilisk shell Obliterators, couple of troop Lightning Claws and a Daemon Prince into my landed but the 2+ save is choices and a nice little Thunder Hammer) leapt out Chaplain, instead he went for great. Then the Predator Daemon Prince. This was of the Crusader (got to love the Crusader and, as it had found its lascannons and going to be scary. that ability of the Land moved 12”, he needed sixes tried its luck. A wound! As Not a lot happened on the Raiders) and assaulted the to hit. Not one rolled up. So the objective was in a first turn, bit of jockeying for first row of Obliterators. What now he was stood in the building we had a 4+ cover position and a Basilisk/ happened next wasn’t pretty middle of my army. Only one save. The tension mounted, Defiler shell both bounced as the whole squad had re- thing for it then... the dice rolled and up came off the Land Raider; as did rolls to hit thanks to the Next turn and the Crusader, the 4! We’d survived. one lascannon. Turn two and Litanies of Hate and then a Dreadnought and a Termie We held two objectives and I went for the full frontal most of them had re-rolls to squad opened up on the neither of us was within 6” of assault with the Crusader. I wound as well thanks to the Prince. We took all but one the third. A good win for me knew it had little chance of lightning claws. Three wound off and so charged at the end of the day and as survival as it raced into the Obliterators died with no the squad of termies in. The the results came in we open with no smoke as it wounds back. The squad Prince died. discovered we’d finished rolled on to their next had used it! It now had to Elsewhere the Chaplain took sixth. I have to say I’m victims, I mean opponents. survive the full might of the out the troop choice and amazed to finish that high Obliterators and the troop Elsewhere we decided to try then proceeded towards the but very proud of the lads for squads in their bunker. a shot with the only Cyclone next squad of Obliterators their achievements. Seven lascannons, Basilisk Missile Launcher that could that were stood on an Another good weekend in and Defiler later and not a see his Land Raider as it objective. By turn six the Cardiff and now time to think single scratch. Not one. They trundled towards our lines. Chaplain and his squad held about what army wants to had failed to get any result at You can guess what an objective, but one more volunteer for next year. all – not even a glancing hit. happened next, can’t you? casualty would take them Yep. Hit. Six to glance. Six to Nick Jenkin It was the single most under half strength. Terminator Muppet unbelievable turn of the blow it up. Couple of guys Elsewhere we had a second entire weekend. You could decided not to get out as objective that he had no-one

A SMALL MATTER OF HONOUR 05 CREATING AN ARMY FOR ASMOH

It’s that time of year again (it painted, and following Gary So this year its time for that being March) and being the from BaD (Bracknell and Dangerous Thought. This Sad Muppet that I am this District Gamers) advice from army having languished in means time to write an army many years back, five new the boxes for twelve months list. Having sat down and run Scourges with dark lances was chomping at the bit through the lists I have pre- were added to the mix. waiting for its turn, but prepared I discovered to my Now came the play testing. NOOOOO GW in its infinite complete amazement that Not many games later and wisdom has realised fourth By now even I’m running out none of them faired well in Rita – she whom must be edition and it will stand less of options and I have some battle over the last year… obeyed in all things said chance then usual with me 3000 points to pick from! I It is therefore about time to “Take your Nids their better throwing the dice. Time to re- finally settled on a list, which retire Caxth and The Warped painted” so I did. Well they jig it. So the first variant comprises the majority of the Mind and bring out a new played well and left the A came out to face Ross and original list and has fought Kabal, that of the Dangerous Small Matter of Honour 04 a his Chaos Marines. A good and lost to two armies, the Thought. This said being a respectable 21/28. game and we did a lot of first a power gamer from the tightwad, as few new damage but lost in the end. Oxford club when they came figures as possible need The Kabal of the Dangerous Thought So drop the Mandrakes and down to us a beat us 5/0 to be bought. A new 1750 point army list weapon swap odd models and the second time to John and bring in some Hellions. Barter’s Nids. And so I wish Archon model converted Archcon and Incubi Retinue w/raider slightly and painted in the And then play Dave Offen- to recommend to you this Wyches w/Raider new colour scheme, James. A nice win but both list, we all need a good laugh Caxth (painted by my wife More Wyches w/Raider armies need changing… now and then. And anyone many years ago) now Lots and lots of warriors (well, 36) Swap another couple of units not laughing after playing this army hasn’t seen my resides in the retirement Three Jet Bikes w/blasters and play Nick Jenkin. I don’t home for elderly tyrants hold out much hope and dice throwing. that is the Welsh Dresser. Scourges w/dark lances then he puts his Sisters on Paul Russell A box set of new Warriors Scourges w/splinter cannons the table. Yet another re- Evil Pixie Muppet had to be assembled and And a Talos think! Page 14 Issue 22, Spring 2005

BETWEEN A ROK AND A HARD PLACE SVA 5: SPIKY CLUB’S CAMPAIGN WEEKEND

Well it was the second the Grey Knights with only them 56 rending shots plus campaign weekend for me one warrior and four 27 heavy bolter shots. and I think the third for Mark stealers, after my warriors Needless to say, I hid around Walker, however I think I am had managed to kill two of the objective with my right in saying that it was the his seven Knights on the way “infantry”, my big boys first for Messrs Waple, in with their Deathspitters! coming on in dribs and drabs Morton and Jenkin. This proved to be enough, as from turn four, which only 8th April dawned and the my stealers managed to kill served to getting them three Marks embarked bright three marines in the first annihilated later in the game and early to the venue of the round. My warrior went down than would have been Spiky club in Reading. We and then in the second possible. We died to a ‘Nid!! met up with the other round we finished off what Second and final game saw Muppets on arrival, Jamie was left! The Inquisitor didn’t me taking on Jamies much using his fine Chem Dogs move, discretion obviously vaunted “Chem Dogs” Seek and Nick his Sisters, that’s being the better part of and Destroy eh! Great! I want Sisters of Battle, not literally, valour! to kill all of them as I don’t believe his Sister Next game for me, 1000 anyway….great! Omega….oh actually plays wargames! points against some of GREAT! I just know what will Anyway where was I, oh yes! John’s (again from the happen here. Well by turn “weight of numbers I Mark Waple was going to be Oxford posse) Marines. This three I was into the Guard using his now acclaimed game allowed me a little line, no big greeblies on yet thought, well they can’t 13th Company, while Mark more flexibility and saw me though, no Tyrants, no Old have enough bullets can Walker took his infamous go for the Recon mission full One Eye! Sheesh! No normal they…..can they?” Plague Bearers. tilt! Everything swarmed Tyrant for that matter!! In Spiky Club operates a forward and thankfully short Jamie played a very system for the sequence of John’s shooting let him tactical game and gave my battles which to my down. Using the cover I Nids a real kicking, if I had knowledge hasn’t changed managed to get my Hormies only rolled a Gamma mission much in the last couple of and Stealers into contact by things may have been years. We were all put into a the second turn, John different! Oh well tomorrow Domain which suited our responded by dropping his would be another day. So far armies, I was with two other Drop pod into my one win, a loss and two Nid players, a Dark Eldar and deployment zone, thus draws….got to get better you an Iron Hand….I know, he earning him some vital would think? wasn’t sure why he was points and diverting some of New day dawned, I had been there either! While the other my Termies back to deal with up since 3:20, when my guys found themselves in this threat. I managed a lovely wife decided to come similar setups. draw after the points were back home from her night added up. If I hadn’t chased The first game was a 400 out with the girls!!! I gave up a Whirlwind around the table trying to go back to sleep point combat patrol and my for three turns and gone into Domain had elected to hit and watched a film, Mark his deployment zone it may and Mark arrived at five the Daemonhunters Domain. have been different. John is My first opponent was a nice hours later and we were off a very good player and to tell again! chap, Ben from the Oxford the truth I was glad of the Gaming Club. A squad of draw! Come to think of it all First game was against Bert Grey Knights and an the Oxford guys I have played Bassett, another Oxford Inquisitor deployed against know what they are doing chap, great player full of two Raveners, three and they are a great bunch good humour, oh how he Warriors, eight Hormagaunts of lads that are a real credit laughed! and eight Genestealers. The mission was the loot “We died to a ‘Nid!!” to the fraternity. My deployment saw me First 1500 point game was counter job, we had five of refuse the flank where the against a marine player from them, now at this point I Inquisitor sat and pile the Spiky club, Gareth. His thought, hell where will my everything in front of the army I have to say is the first army be? In his half of the Knights, weight of numbers I real “specialist” army I have table, so as part of my thought, well they can’t have played, his choice was three cunning plan I deployed all enough bullets can Dread’s, nine Landspeeder my counters in Bert’s half of they…..can they? tornados, a terminator squad the table, great, very cunning Right we’re off, bounding and two squads of five I thought, then we rolled for across the table utilising all scouts, oh and a chaplain. the mission level….oh (ed - the cover along the way, We rolled Omega and this darn it) Escalation again… Ben’s shooting was was a “Take and Hold”. Lots aaaaaaargh! Well it can’t be awesome. I finally assaulted of Assault cannons, giving as bad for the third time can The NewsLetter Page 15

it? My luck has got to were supposed to keep our (if you are reading this Ben I creature has the ability of change, right? No way. Bert’s own most expensive blame you entirely for the being able to pick out a Blood Angel army turned up character alive….not kill the fact that I am now the proud model in base to base on turn two, all apart from oppositions. We agreed that owner of ten of these new contact, if I had taken the one Dreadnought, that’s we had followed the ruling in models, you git) the Power fist wielding Marine, three Furioso’s, thirty odd our own way and both got Terminators ripped up half who ultimately killed the scouts, one Marine squad, the bonus points…hurrah! my twelve Genestealer Tyrant, it may have been a and two normal Dreads plus The last game saw me up squad in the preceding turn, different story!!! Attack Bikes. Oh and what I against Ben, another great allowing only five to actually am told is a “small” death make the assault in my turn, Oh well the moral of this is to guy, great game, straight out get more sleep and keep company…only six marines of the annals of Space Hulk, I managed to kill five out of and a Chaplain. The special the six Terminators with the practicing with your choice of the mission was a cleanse army and certainly don’t mission here was that if I mission and we rolled rending claws!! It didn’t help killed the most valuable with Ben rolling lots of ones make too many changes on Alpha!!!!! Oh my goodness, the eve of this sort of event. character, my domain would we were weeping tears of for any of his saving throws, get twenty bonus campaign pure joy! Ben’s Marine army throughout the game, for all Last but not least, I would points! Well I went for it, the was a vanilla type with a trait the squads! The final stage like to say a special thank Winged Tyrant came on turn and drawback which I forgot saw my Winged Tyrant and you to the Spiky boys, two. Yippee! The rest to write down, so apologies Old One eye slugging it out especially, Dave Palmer and however didn’t until turn four mate if you read this! I only with an assault squad and a Sean Curtis, as without their and the other Tyrant turn remember that he couldn’t Dreadnought respectively, time and effort, we would all just be playing the straight five, bloody slacker… Well it take Land Speeders! the shame of my play was was horrible for me, the only that I forgot that Old One Eye forward versions of the game bonus being that my Winged We deployed fully in our “automatically” regenerates in our own back yards and Tyrant managed to kill the respective quarters, at the end of the Tyranid not getting the chance to Chaplain, only to be killed aaaaaaand went for it, my turn, needing a 4+ only if it’s meet some great people. Stealers, Raveners, Hormies, itself by the death throws of killed! This would have Until next year then, must try said character. It was only Winged Tyrant, Old One Eye allowed me to contest a and the Termies flooded to get more of the Muppets after the dust had settled quarter, while the Tyrant, as into the same domain! that we both realised that we forward, the Stealers tore a Tyranid monstrous into Ben’s new Terminators, Mark Freeth

O VERLORD 2005 THE FINAL, FINAL TRIALS

opportunity to than a few take a demo days game to developing, Abingdon building Wargaming and Club’s annual playtesting show, Overlord, the game on the grounds I that would was on my be the honeymoon (I flagship game for SMS at final outing, and Final Final know, what Games Workshop’s Trials, and once again the commitment?). Gamesday. game proved to be very However apart With John Barter’s and Nick popular, a fine testament to March 13th. Sunday morning from Colours in September, Jenkin’s help, the game saw the efforts put into the (or Saturday after-evening Overlord is probably the its first outing at the Romsey project. depending on your point of closest show to the Sad Model Show in September. So what next? Well, the view). Muppet Society’s stomping Followed by Gamesday, a board will see one final Last year I missed the grounds therefore this year I visit to SMS itself (sorry it outing to A Small Matter of was determined that we took so long guys), and then Honour in May and after that should get by request to we hope to sell it off to help there. Miniature finance our next project, the Back last Merchants, Lake of Kadrin-ril. summer, an Richard Kerry myself, independent Major Muppet Other game store in Muppet, Newbury. Dave Driver, March 13th Marks and Overlord Waple and 2005 was Freeth, planned as spent more the game’s Page 16 Issue 22, Spring 2005

WHERE THERE BE DRAGONS... SPIKY CLUB/SMS OPEN PLAY FIXTURE

representing the club. In then particular, Nick had come charge equipped to dismantle any the two army having bought his Dark said Eldar3. Mark Freeth had his drones. Nids with him, Mark Waple Somehow was using his 13th Company in that As anyone from Space Wolves and I had my first the Sad Muppet Tau. round of Society will be After somewhat confusing combat, Nick considers his next move carefully... able to tell you, the locals with our arrival, we one of there’s a big sorted out four games and the two drones survived, and biggest threat to my plans at blue line that runs across got started. My opponent for then even more incredibly, that point. most road maps of the the evening would be Matt that drone decided not to run The Hammerheads United Kingdom, and above Finch, a jolly nice fellow I had away. Stupid drone. systematically destroyed the this line “there be dragons.” met at A Small Matter of Excorist, and Matt’s This is the M4. So that was Matt’s first turn. Honour last year were he With one Evensor Assassin Inquistor, although the both Just above the M4 and was using his Tau. This time on my doorstep I decided to of the remaining Battle Sister therefore in dragon territory around, he had his Witch concentrate on the Penitent squads seemed to be lies our closest GCN Hunters with him and after Engines. Two disappeared completely invulnerable to neighbour, Reading’s Spiky much rolling on charts, the under a hail of seeker pulse fire (or plasma or Club. Unsurprisingly we mission was to be Gamma missiles whilst the other one missile pods). know a few of the guys from level Cleanse. fell to a lucky plasma rifle It wasn’t pretty but in the Spiky Club (mainly because I have to admit I thought my shot from one of the Crisis end the First Naval Cadre they’ve dismantled our day was about to go from Suits. wiped everything out and armies at various bad to worse when Matt put The Kroot and Stealth Suits Matt’s crowning moment tournaments) so the Open down his first Heavy Support was destroying the railgun on Play Fixture on the 20th managed to all-but choice. I’ve read up on annihilate a squad of one of the Hammerheads. April, on their home turf was Penitent Engines before but Despite this Matt remained always going to be fun. advancing Battle Sisters had never actually played while the two Hammerheads in remarkably good humour I’d come back from a them. And Matt had three. removed the Stormtroopers and I can honestly say he meeting in Coventry (where Oh, that could hurt. After my and blew up an Immolator. was one of the most fun even dragons are a little two Hammerheads deployed Poor Matt’s face dropped. In opponents I’ve ever played. nervous) and all things behind the nearest cover, one round of shooting a Elsewhere in the Post Office 1 considered had a naff day . Matt then put down an significant part of his army club room, Mark Waple Coupled with my mobile Exorcist. had just disappeared. finished ages before me prompting dying whilst trying However things looked even Unsurprisingly the drone’s having eaten his opponent, to organise this fixture, grimmer once we got around and Mr Freeth did pretty the things where not going well. luck didn’t keep him alive for to deploy infiltrators. Ah ha I a second round against the same. However, after eventually thought, Stealth Suits and Eversor, however with my Then finally, despite virtually finding junction 7 on the Kroot, you’re in trouble now tactical withdraw and some being wiped out, Nick M40, and getting something Mr Finch, and then he careful positioning of two managed to win his Alpha 2 to eat , I was in Reading with deployed an Evensor Devilfish, he could only level mission on the plenty of time to spare and Assassin within 18” of one of charge one of the APCs in his objectives in the last turn. So stood around chatting to Mr my Pathfinder units. Oh, turn. a four-nil result to Team Freeth for half an hour. glup. The highlight of Matt’s turn Muppet. Now there’s one for For this fixture, myself, The first move was to use two was the light toasting the roll of honour! Marks Freeth and Waple, the Pathfinders scout move one heavy flamer inflicted on Richard Kerry plus Nick Jenkin would be to action a tactical withdraw my Kroot. So much for hiding Major Muppet from the in the woods. However, on area, whilst the plus side Matt’s Excorist sending was out of range of the Notes: two drones Hammerheads, although of 1. The ‘exploding’ window at to draw the course not the other way home wasn’t a good start… Imperial round. 2. I use the term loosely, I Agent out. found a McDonalds. Matt got After Matt’s Eversor failing to the first attach a melta bomb to one 3. The previous weekend turn and of the Devilfish, both tanks his Witch Hunters had not proceeded plus two full squads of had a good time had SVA5. I to run Pathfinders unloaded think he was after a bit of towards my everything into him, payback. army, and removing possibly the Opening moves as Matt charges forward The NewsLetter Page 17

THE GREAT EBAY EXPERIMENT!

I would like to start by saying buy individual and specific that I blame my latest army units. However you can get entirely on the internet. I had much bigger savings when managed to raise self- people sell big lots. Many restrain almost to an art people might bid for a form by steadfastly refusing regiment of Skeletons all the shiny new toys that (after all, you can always GW dangled in front of my use more) but few people face week after week. The bid much on large mixed reason for my self-imposed lots because they only austerity was simple, I am appeal to people who need currently drowning under all or most of the units in savings I was after. The lot unpainted miniatures and I them. I was convinced that contained Spirit Hosts, really shouldn’t be getting with patience and some Graveguard, Vampires and any more. savvy bidding, I could make some Black Knights. It set I have been playing the a big saving because there me back about £30 and was beautiful game for more than would not be many other worth over £70 new. That twelve years now and like people bidding on the sort of was more like it! For only most veterans, I have lots I would target. The only 40% of RRP, I had acquired a accumulated far too many downside with this plan was lot of the metal Elites for my armies (including ones for that my army would be new army. races that are no longer even rather haphazard and it Enthused by my new-found in print!). So with three 40K would be difficult to plan. success I continued to scour armies, another for Fantasy, The army I picked for this eBay and started posting on two Battle Fleet Gothic fleets experiment was Vampire Portent. I was able to trade a and three Epic armies, I was Counts. I have always had a load of space marine spare determined not to start yet fondness for Vampires in parts for Ghouls, a Black another project. fiction and I liked both the Coach and a large box of That is why I blame the colour scheme and the Zombie parts. For just the internet you see? I was models in GW’s range. So my cost of managing to hold onto this resolutions were forgotten postage I had resolution until Christmas and the children of the night managed to 2003 when I got involved in gained a new follower. get around a series of discussions on The early days were a £50 of new Portent. A regular theme that modest start to the plan. I models. crops up is players picked up some Banshees Another trade bemoaning the prices of GW and a spirit host plus a few for some figs and how expensive it is other odds and ends. My Wraithguard to get into the hobby. Tired expenditure was running at gave me with making the same about 70% of RRP for the enough suggestions about buying first month or so. Not a bad Grave Guard online, using eBay and other start although less than I had to complete money saving ideas, I hoped. Then I went a blew it my unit. decided to put my money all by splashing out on the A few months leading up to where my mouth was. I lovely limited edition the start of the summer would build a new army from standard bearer which cost allowed me to pick up some scratch and I would do it for me all the money I had Skeletons and more half RRP (Recommend Retail managed to save on my Zombies. I settled down to Price) or less. earlier purchases. I consoled take stock and realised I had I decided to put my There were no rules beyond myself that the new model acquired over 3000 points of that 50% target. I could buy would form the centrepiece Undead (not counting special money where my mouth from anywhere I wanted of my army but I still berated characters like Manfred Von was. including eBay, my gaming myself. I need to do better Carstein) for a little over club and even GW for items I and score some real £150. By rough and ready I would build a new could not find anywhere else. bargains. estimate, I now had a large army from scratch and I I also decided that I would Things really kicked into gear and viable army for which I trade some old stuff that I at the start of spring 2004. had paid on average only would do it for half would never get round to My first big find on eBay was 40% of the RRP. painting on Portent in a bid a blurry photo showing a lot Now all I have to do is paint RRP or less. to bring prices even lower. of metal undead. With much it! My reasoning was this. poring over the image, I Matthew Pinto Buying on eBay can often net managed to find that this Pointy Teeth Muppet a 10-20% saving when you could be one of the big Page 18 Issue 22, Spring 2005

YOUR SOUL WILL BE OURS!!! TACTICA: DARK ELDAR

The Dark Eldar were my first wielded by some of the best you will lose. army. Yep, you read that shooting troops in the game. Army Structure right. I picked them ahead of Dark Lances, Disintegrators, the Marines from the starter Splinter Cannons and Now that the ground rules box back in 1999. Since I Blasters are fantastic are out let’s look at the basic started playing in 2001 I’ve weapons and your structure of my 1500 point played 66 games with this opponents will be amazed at army and then I’ll run Darkness. Torture. Soul mob, won 35 lost 21 and how much firepower a single through each of the units and what their basic purpose devouring. Firepower. drawn the other 10. They’ve unit can chuck out. Assault. Speed. How can you is in each game. I’ll also look been second in a Morale not love an army that does tournament under fourth at some of the weapon and all of these and more? edition rules and I think it’s You have good morale. wargear choices. now time to lay down just Everyone is Leadership 8 or By the end of this, hopefully, The Dark Eldar are all of the higher. Chances are you’ll above and more and yet, for what it is about these guys you’ll understand more of and galls that makes them survive one or two checks the ways of the dark kin who some reason, they are seen before legging it. Once again, as an army of losers by so damned good as an army. will devour your soul by the All in my humble opinion of don’t be afraid to throw moonlight. many. As an army that only yourself into the fray. Speed the mad would select. You course!! bumps are great. So, how does it work then? make one mistake, they will Before embarking on the Every unit in this army is say, and the game is lost. individual units allow me to Cover They are an army for the set some ground rules which 1500 Point Dark Eldar Army List more experienced gamer I would advise you to learn only. with this army. Command Squad All of which is tosh. Pure and Isolation Dracon (agoniser, shadow field, combat drugs, splinter pistol, plasma grenades), 3 Incubi (plasma grenades), 2 Warriors simple. This is an army that You do not react well to is good at everything it does. being isolated. Use all the (splinter cannons, plasma grenades), Raider (disintegrator) If you learn to embrace the units together for best Wych Squad darkness, and be prepared results. However, the same Succubus (agoniser, splinter pistol, combat drugs, wych to make sacrifices, then you is true of your opponent. weapons), 7 Wyches (wych weapons, one blaster), Raider will prevail against all those Isolate him and strike. (disintegrator) naysayers. You’ll be drinking souls in no time. Resilience 3 Raider Squads You are not resilient to fire. Sybarite (agoniser, splinter pistol), 6 or 7 Warriors (one At only toughness 3 and with blaster, one splinter cannon), Raider (dark lance) a 5+ save you are going to lose tons of them. Don’t 2 Warrior Squads worry. It’s all about 10 Warriors (two dark lances) presenting the targets you want to be shot at whilst Ravager (two dark lances, one disintegrator) hiding the others! Raiders are only armour 10; they will fall out of the sky with a 2 Talos certain panache. Expect it. Use it. Hug the trees. Make expendable but not all in the Encourage it as every same battle, at least not crashed Raider is a size your opponent have to hunt you down. This can lead to normally! Sometimes I three terrain piece that block sacrifice the Wyches, other line of sight. Great for him getting ahead of himself and isolated. Patience is a times my Raider squads or funnelling. the Talos and sometimes virtue. Speed even my HQ is thrown in Mission You are very, very fast. knowing it will die. Why? ‘cos Raiders can go 24”, most of Never, ever, ever, forget the it throws the enemy off your ground troops can fleet mission parameters. I have guard! of foot. Use speed to always lost count of the number of Allow me to run through why control the battle. Make your games that people think they I take the units, weapons opponent react to you. In are winning only to draw or and wargear above. I’ll then combat your initiative will lose because they have try and bring it all together so nearly always be higher; forgotten about table that you can see how they never under-estimate the quarters or the like. As a then work together to win standard Dark Eldar Warrior Dark Eldar player you will battles. in combat. learn to plan ahead and think about the mission or, In this article I present the Firepower I’m sorry to say, the HQ and Elites. You have some of the best naysayers will be correct and So there you have part one. guns in the game being Two very mean and nasty The NewsLetter Page 19

HQ Elites Command Squad Wyches Main Purpose: Combat Main Purpose: Combat Secondary Purpose: Intimidation Secondary Purpose: Mission Parameters Tertiary Purpose: Mission Parameters Tertiary Purpose: Intimidation Dracon: Why take a Dracon when I could have an Archon? Too Good: many points. An Archon has one more attack, wound and Combat: Wyches are really good at it. The 4+ dodge save is initiative. The Dracon initiative is already higher than, or at fantastic and will enable you to tie something up for quite least equal to, the best troops out there so why upgrade? The some time. Use this squad against power weapons as it extra attack can be countered by the combat drugs and the annoys your enemy. wound is meaningless when you have a Shadow Field. If the field fails then you’re going to die quickly anyway and, a lot of Bad: the time, you’re being hit by weapons of strength 6 or above – Being shot at: Wyches die horribly to every weapon in the Insta-kill territory if you fail the field roll. game. Combat Drugs: Always worth it for that extra attack and re-roll Weapons/Wargear: misses combo. Very useful for those occasions when you really Wych Weapons: Under fourth edition these beauties halve the need to do damage. WS of whoever you are fighting both when you hit them and Shadow Field: Um, right. You don’t have to ask why a 2+ when they hit you. Generally this means you will be hitting on a Invulnerable on a toughness 3 character is useful do you? 3 whilst being hit on a 4. This helps as a lot of armies will be Problem is I cannot see a reason not to take it, which is wounding you on a 4 whilst you’re trying to wound on a 5. probably wrong. Blaster: Always useful. If there’s a way of taking a wound off Agoniser: I swear by them. Absolutely stunning weapon. You’ll something or removing a member of a squad before you have noted that I give this to every character that I can. Why charge then take it. not? A 4+ auto wound on anything no matter the toughness? Raider: Since you’ll be heading into combat bring the gun Yes please. For an army who are only strength 3 I ensure that (Disintegrator) that can kill the most people at once. Helps we can take out everything we come across (especially prevent back up units from charging your Wych combat. Wraithlords). Combat Drugs: I take re-roll misses and nothing more. Since I Incubi: Only three? These guys are lethal but frankly why go only have 1 wound I have yet to find any reason to risk killing overboard? With the sheer number of attacks on the charge myself with drugs, but the extra attack with the Agoniser has these guys are nasty, and when coupled with the Dracon, they more than paid for the Combat Drugs on many occasions. are likely to wipe out whatever they face. Herein lies the Fleet of Foot: With the Raider able to move 12”, you can jump problem, this isn’t always a good thing!!! I rarely want to wipe out 2”, fleet of foot up to 6” and assault 6” (sometimes 12” if out, or beat the enemy, in the first round of combat as then I’ll you get the right drug roll). You’ve got a charge reach of be standing in the open. So I take less of these, and the between 21” and 32” – you can control who and what gets Dracon, to try and ensure not everyone dies immediately!!! I charged by this lot. Providing you remember the ground rules know – shocking isn’t it? about speed and cover. Warriors: With Splinter Cannon? In a combat squad? Why not? Haywire Grenades: These are great tank buster bombs and in They’re in a Raider that means they can all fire out (it’s open- third edition before the dodge save these were great as the topped). Two of these provide Eight shots at 24” and they can Wyches tended to go hunting tanks. Things have changed and move 12” and still fire out. Eight strength 4 shots at 36” range? I now have plenty of other tank killers. The Wyches are now Yes please! Oh and when your command squad get shot down back in hand to hand mode so I no longer see a need for miles from the enemy what are you going to do. You can’t fleet of foot ‘cos of the Incubi. Next best thing is to shoot at the Haywires. enemy when you can. Plasma Grenades: Not as vital that we go first as we all have an invulnerable save so I’ve not found the need for these Raider: Marines hate Disintegrators. Basically it’s a Plasma grenades yet. The Combat Drugs on the Succubus mean that Cannon that will cause absolute grief to power armour. 36” she can opt to go first no matter what and, quite frankly, that range and can move 12” and still fire and don’t forget the should be enough! secondary fire mode; it’s proved more than useful of late! Plasma grenades: These have become a total necessity lately. Like frag grenades they help you when you charge into combat but, unlike frag, they allow you to strike in initiative order! I hold the opinion that I don’t like spending too many points on my HQ. The more units I have the more chance I have of securing quarters, objectives and having scoring units left on the board. Oh and plus you can throw so much at the enemy at once that they don’t know what to shoot at next! Each to their own though.

combat squads, very capable are doing whilst this is going of slicing through anything on will be covered in part two that gets in their way; but of this ‘ere likkle article. they must be protected at all Nick Jenkin costs to ensure they get Dark Lord Muppet there. How to try and do that and just what all the other units THE LEAGUE 20042005 THE SAD MUPPET SOCIETY Bragging Rights 2005 (as of 05/05/2005) valde tristes sumus… Player Played Won Drawn Lost Bonus Points Rating (we’re very sad indeed…) Matthew Pinto 5 5 0 0 0 10 2.00 Email: [email protected] John Barter 3 3 0 0 0 6 2.00 Web: www.sadmuppets.org Yahoo Group: groups.yahoo.com/groups/ Antony Walls 2 2 0 0 0 4 2.00 sadmuppets Phone: 0118 9820489 (David) Dave McCoy 6 4 0 2 1 9 1.50 The league is a chance Richard Kerry 6 4 0 2 1 9 1.50 THE COMMITTEE for members to test each other’s metal Chief Muppet Richard Kerry Nick Jenkin 9 5 1 3 1 12 1.33 (again). Money Muppet Paul Russell Ben Dove 3 1 2 0 0 4 1.33 Other Muppet David Offen-James • A win is worth 2 Memory Muppet Nick(ron) Jenkin points Nathan White 3 2 0 1 0 4 1.33 • A draw is worth 1 Mark Waple 4 2 0 2 1 5 1.25 THE CONTRIBUTORS points (any result Mark Freeth 5 2 2 1 0 6 1.20 (in no particular order of importance or where the winning achievement) margin is 10% or David Offen-James 9 4 0 5 1 9 1.00 Richard Kerry, Nick Jenkin, Mark Freeth, less of the starting Nathan White, Mark Waple, Jamie Morton, values of the armies Paul Russell 9 4 0 5 1 9 1.00 Daniel Gibbons, Dave Offen-James, Paul involved or defined Russell, Matthew Pinto, Ian Westmoreland Jamie Morton 3 1 1 1 0 3 1.00 and Che Webster as a draw by the Andrew Driver 7 2 1 4 1 6 0.86 scenario) No tau were harmed in the publication of • A loss is worth 0 Dave Driver 4 1 1 2 0 3 0.75 this Newsletter. points. Ross McNaughton 4 1 0 3 1 3 0.75 • A bonus point can be earned for winning Peter Hibbett 4 1 0 3 0 2 0.50 against someone Mark Walker 2 0 1 1 0 1 0.50 with a better rating than you in the Daniel Gibbons 5 1 0 4 0 2 0.40 league. Nick Doran 6 0 1 5 0 1 0.17 • And you must play at least ten Steve Mesmer 1 0 0 1 0 0 0.00 The Disclaimer games to be in This material is completely unofficial and in contention for no way endorsed by Games Workshop Limited. the title and Adeptus Astartes, Battlefleet Gothic, Black you must be a Templars, Blood Angels, Blood Bowl, member. Catachan Jungle Fighters, Chaos Space Marines, the Chaos device, Codex, Dark • Remember Eldar, Dark Angels, Dark Future, the any game can Double-Headed/Imperial Eagle device, the be a league 40k device, Dwarfs Crossed Hammer logo, game as long 'Eavy Metal, Epic, Eldar, Eldar symbol devices, Eye of Terror, the Games you agree with Workshop logo, Games Workshop, your opponent Genestealer, Golden Demon, Gorkamorka, beforehand. Grey Knight, Hammer of Sigmar, Horned Rat logo, Inquisitor, the Inquisitor device , Nick Jenkin Khorne, the Khorne device, Kislev, Kroot, League Muppet Leman Russ, Mordheim, Necron, Necromunda, Nurgle, Nurgle logo, Ork, Ork Skull devices, Skaven, Skaven logos, Slaanesh, Slaanesh logo, Slottabase, Space Hulk, Space Marine, Space Marine chapter logos, Space Wolves, Sisters of Battle, Steel Legion, Talisman, Tau, the Tau caste designations, Tyranid, Tyrannid, Tzeentch, Tzeentch logo, Ultramarines, Vampire Count logo, Von Carstein, Von Carstein logo, Chaos, 40k, GW, Warmaster, Warhammer, White Dwarf, and all associated marks, names, characters, illustrations and images from the Warhammer world and Warhammer 40,000 universe are either (r), TM and/or (c) Games Workshop Ltd 2000-2004, variably registered in the UK and other countries More Ork bikes than you can shake a big stick at. This is Dave Continuing the ASMOH theme, here around the world, used without permission. No challenge to their status intended. All McCoy’s Speed Freak army for ASMOH this year. are some very nice ‘Killer Kans’ from Rights Reserved. Ian Courtney’s Ork army