December 2016 Alternative Adventure Honda’s VFR1200X & NC700X aerostich.com/cb Coffee at the start, pizza at the end, East Bay twisties in between! We raised $700 last year—let’s make it $1,000 this year! Meet at Cornerstone Coffee, 20991 Redwood Rd, Castro Valley, CA 94619 $20 per rider ALL money goes to Alameda County CASA Coffee time: 10 AM Kickstands up: 11 AM Pizza: whenever we get there! Get more info and (please!) RSVP: CityBike.com/RFGB Photo - Jose Mejia ©2016 aero cb 10 2016.indd 1 8/31/16 9:55 AM California BMW 2490 Old Middlefield Way Mountain View, CA 94043 650-966-1183 www.calbmw.com BMW of Tri Valley 952 North Canyons Parkway Livermore, CA 94551 925-583-3300 www.calbmw.com December 2016 | 2 | CityBike.com News, Clues & Rumors Volume XXXIII, Issue 12 Publication Date: November 14, 2016 On The Cover: The Treasure On That Island Is that The Man hates motorcycles, even went into making this happen, and we’re Max Klein ‘Stiching up a series of corners Minibike Racing though the rejection email included these looking forward to riding in the expanded on Honda’s VFR1200X. flattering and certainly sincere words: park by the time Tesla figures out how to Photo: Angelica Rubalcaba Minibike racing seems to be on a little “Because of your outstanding credentials make self-driving cars that don’t run down upswing—it’s cheap and easy (like us!) and experience, I want to encourage you to motorcyclists. Contents: and a lot of fun (where the similarity ends, apply for the Council in the future.” NCR............................ 3 unfortunately). If you read our coverage of So You Like Metal? Pitstops ........................ 4 Well ok then—we’ll try again next year. the last Treasure Island midnight minibike If you’ve previously read CityBike, you Uneasy Rider . 6 Open recruitment starts sometime in the New Stuff ....................... 7 madness (“Show Us Your TI TT” – News, may have caught a whiff of our dislike spring or summer of 2017, meaning all Events......................... 10 Clues & Rumors, December 2012), you’ll for crowdfunding. To be fair, it’s not Ex-NC ......................... 11 seats will be available and current advisors be happy to hear that the Dames Don’t like we hate the concept—we actually VF-Article ...................... 14 must reapply for their spots. See Bee . 17 Care Motorcycle Collective is bringing the contribute to campaigns for things we Scoots ‘n’ Pasta ................. 18 TITT back the evening of November 26th. Maynard ....................... 20 American (Flat Track) Is care about—it’s just that so many people Hertfelder...................... 21 We’re gonna make you work for the Already Great, Mr. Trump asking for money are looking for free Doc Frazier..................... 22 particulars, in part because this might not funding for bitchass bullshit that they Devine ........................ 23 Seriously. All this bombast and bullshit be a 100% sanctioned event, by…well, should go out and work for themselves, or Classifieds ..................... 24 about making America great again is a little Locals Only..................... 25 anyone. But we do know that you’ll need want someone to pay the penalty for their disingenuous when we already Slappy McSlapperson ............ 26 a four-stroke under 125cc or a two-stroke Last Page Photo ................. 27 have kickass flat track racing, with less than 80cc. It’s free to stand Carnegie Expansion Opening Date...... 29 thanks to certainly-not-a- around laughing and talking shit, but single-goddamn-politician. Find us online at: there’ll be a fee to race. CityBike.com The newly christened American The location has not been disclosed, /CityBikeMag (fuck yeah!) Flat Track (formerly known but we’re guessing it might be near your moronic mistakes. “Bro. I crashed my as AMA Pro Flat Track) series has released /CityBikeMag favorite Treasure Island motorcycle shop. Gixxer because I don’t know what contra- its 2017 schedule and thankfully we’re still That’s all we’re gonna give you, so if you stirring or whatever is. Help me pay for /CityBikeMag gonna have races in California, in spite of wanna get in on this, start asking around— new fairings and sneakers, puhleeeez!” Contact CityBike: recent oh-so-realistic talk of secession. or using the internet—for details. We’ll see But sometimes, crowdfunding serves PO Box 18738 you there! Oakland CA 94619 We’ll get three races in the Golden State to, you know, fund things that actually Phone: 415.282.2790 in 2017: the Sacramento Mile on May benefit the crowd. Such is the case with Wanna Be The Next Helimot th th Editorial: [email protected] 20 , the Calistoga Half-Mile on July 29 , Moto Guild’s GoFundMe effort, which Advertising / Business: [email protected] Dealer? Hell Yeah! and the Perris Half-Mile on October 7th. will greatly increase the capabilities of the CityBike Staff: If you’re with us on CityBike SF / Treasure Island Moto Guild facility Editor in Chief & Jackass of All Trades: Surj Gish the hell yeah part, will be in to include a pretty legit metal shop with Master of Puppets & Layout: Angelica Rubalcaba you should know attendance tools like a desktop mill and lathe, band Senior Editor: Robert Stokstad that you do need to at The Sac saw, sheet metal shear and brake, MIG Mile and Chief of the World Adventure Affairs Desk: have a motorcycle & TIG welder, welding table, tools, and Dr. Gregory Frazier shop. You can’t just The ‘Stogie, supplies, plus bead blasting, painting Staff Photographers: Robert Stokstad, go around town with and who and powder coating capabilities and a Angelica Rubalcaba, Max Klein a trenchcoat full knows, hydraulic press. Artwork: Mr. Jensen, Sam Devine of gloves, winking maybe we’ll Operations: Gwynne Fitzsimmons and whispering even figure As we went to press they’d actually Road Scholars: “Hey buddy, wanna out some exceeded their goal, so all bets are on, Sam Devine, An DeYoung, Jeff Ebner, Fish, buy some bitchin’ kind of epic at least bets on Moto Guild SF getting Max Klein motorcycle gloves?” ride to a some bitchin’ new tools. Why are we Contributors: race or two running this story, then? Well, just to tell Michele Appel, Dan Baizer, Craig Bessenger, J. But if you are a shop, you that Moto Guild SF is getting this Brandon, Blaise Descollonges, Julian Farnam, outside of Alonzo Fumar, Will Guyan, Brian Halton, David or know one that California— stuff, we suppose, and also to provide Hough, Maynard Hershon, Ed Hertfelder, Otto would make a good second home for the although you can bet your ass it won’t be another opportunity to talk shit about Hofmann, John Joss, Bill Klein, David Lander, best damn US-made gloves this side of the Florida, because fuck Florida. crowdfunding. Lucien Lewis, Larry Orlick, TJ Noto, Courtney Pecos (and the other side too), Helimot is Olive, Jason Potts, Bob Pushwa, Gary Rather, looking for one good dealer for their gloves For the full schedule, check out The Moto Guild Metal Shop campaign is Charlie Rauseo, Curt Relick, Mike Solis, Ivan at gofundme.com/MotoGuild, in case you Thelin, James Thurber. in the Bay Area. The chosen shop will be AMAProRacing.com/flat-track/events/ want to add to the pile of money—they’re Alumni (RIP): the only dealer in the San Francisco Bay default John D’India, Joe Glydon, Gary Jaehne, Area, other than Helimot HQ in Fremont, offering some pretty useful incentives, Adam Wade of course. Any interested shops should Carngegie Expansion & New like free shop time, instead of the usual For back issue and archive requests, email [email protected]. Back Master Plan Approved! “donate $500 and I’ll sing a song on your issues (if we have ‘em) are five bucks a pop. No, we will not mail you email Helimot at [email protected]. our last copy of an issue from the ‘80s for free, just because your buddy st voicemail” bullshit. was on the cover. We can find stories (maybe) and send you scanned On October 21 , the California Off images for $5, too, but please know what you’re looking for and the year of publication… at least! If you say something like, “Well, it was about Editor Surj Ain’t On The MTC this cool bike I used to see at Alice’s and I think it was in 1988... or maybe Highway Motor 1994, or maybe it was in Urban Moto” we will buy a cheap latex adult novelty and mail it to your grandkids. Remember how we told you that Editor Vehicle Commission CityBike is published on or about the third Monday of each month. Editorial Surj applied for a spot on the Metropolitan voted unanimously deadline is the 1st of each month. Advertising information is available on More outhouses (and hopefully no more fire) coming soon! request. Unsolicited articles and photographs are always welcome. Please include a full name, address and phone number with all submissions. We Transportation Commission’s Policy to approve the new reserve the right to edit manuscripts or use them to wipe our large, fragrant bottoms. Advisory Council (“Speaking Of Advisory Park Master Plan and ©2016, CityBike Magazine, Inc. Citybike Magazine is distributed at over Boards, The MTC Needs You.” – News, expansion into 3,100 200 places throughout California each month. Taking more than a few copies at any one place without permission from CityBike Magazine, Inc, especially for purposes of recycling, is theft and will be prosecuted to the Clues & Rumors, September 2016) in an acres the state bought full extent of civil and criminal law. Yeah! attempt to get us some moto-representation in 1998.