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Fordham University’s journal of news, comment, analysis, and review volume XXXIX The Paper issue IV Suspense! With: Michael Sulick, p. 3 Douchebags, p. 9 The Blend Cafe, p. 15 Also Starring: Comix, p. 24 Romance! In Theaters April 14, 2010 page 2 the paper april 14, 2010 Every issue online & blog posts about everything and nothing. Check us out online: fupaper.wordpress.com Fan mail? Hate mail? “ Deepest, darkest secrets” Write to us! Editors-in-Chief the paper Bobby “Is the Zodiac Killer” Cardos c/o Offi ce of Student Leadership Alex “Jerked Off in the Print Shop Once” Gibbons and Community Development Fordham University Executive Editors Bronx, NY 10458 Sean “Evangelical Christian” Kelly [email protected] Emily “Hates Her Vagina” Genetta the paper, Fordham University’s student journal of news, analysis, com- News Editors ment, and review, is a product solely of the students. No part of the publication Alex “Cat Lady” Orf may be reproduced without written consent of the editors. the paper is produced Sean “Has a Fake Moustache” Bandfi eld using Adobe InDesign, Adobe Photoshop, Microsoft Word, and the incredibly hard work of the people to the right. Photos are “borrowed” from Internet sites like: www.google.com, www.imdb.com, www.nambla.org, www.rollingstone. Arts Editors com, www.cnn.com. Sorry mom, subscriptions are not available. Ad rates are Kaitlin “Suffers from Bouts of the Vapours” Campbell unreasonable – don’t ask. Open staff meetings are held Tuesdays at 8PM near our Mickie “Never Nude” Meinhardt offi ce, McGinley B-57, in The Ramskellar, located in the basement of McGinley. Articles and letters to the editor may be submitted via e-mail to paper.fordham@ Earwax Editor gmail.com, or scrawled incoherently in White-Out on back issues of Penthouse Sarah “Rush Limbaugh Superfan” Madges magazine. 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You might just learn something. Jake “Minor Character in Grapes of Wrath” Sanders Lauren “Canadian” Duca our aim Will “Possibly Didn’t Copyedit” Yates the paper is Fordham University’s student journal of news, analysis, comment, and review. Our aim is to give the Fordham community fresh insights on old is- Contributors sues, new thoughts on new issues, and information that other campus publications may not be able to report. We do not claim to be a newspaper of record – facts, Not Parents, Katie Levitt, Primary Colors, Caroline Egan, Sonic fi gures, and dates. Instead, we focus on the Fordham student perspective, on the Hedgehog, William Dudley, Candy, Munchiez, Munchies, thoughtful analysis, and on the comprehension of the full scope of events, rather Chris Gramuglia, Public Urination, Danny Miami, Strawberry than staggered and straight news coverage. In short, our emphasis is on the obvi- Cough, Andrew Craig, Prospective Students, Learning About ous and active role of the student writer in his or her work. We also aim to provide Hip-Hop, Keelin O’Donoghue, Large Marge, Grace Waltemyer, Fordham students a less fettered venue for expression, something they may not be Uppers and Downers, Diction, Holden McGroin, Catered Events, able to fi nd at other student publications. McShanehawk, Humphery Bogart, Real Talk, Beasts Anonymous, Basically, if we make you laugh, piss you off, or move you in some way, then Pop Physicists, Not Sunlight, PBR Cat, Car and Driver Magazine we’re doing our job. If you don’t like it, shut your pie hole (or come write for us)! April 14, 2010 the paper page 3 news CIA Clandestine Services Director Lectures, But Offers No Substance Fordham, USG Rise to the Occasion By Censoring Student Questions by Sarah Madges stan, where 80% of those killed ture on Leadership and Gov- Gordon received, it is infuriat- the president secret information EARWAX EDITOR are civilians. After compiling a ernment Service” began with ing that not one was asked and about security threats and over- list of such questions, McGov- laudatory remarks about Su- answered. seeing “covert action,” though n Thursday, March 25th, ern warned us to “anticipate him lick’s humanitarian relief ef- Moreover, never did Mi- he never elucidated what that Oformer CIA analyst/cur- fudging [the answers].” forts, service in Vietnam, and chael Sulick even mention even meant. Amidst the palaver rent pastoral associate Ray Good advice. It didn’t take his 25+ years in the CIA. Here words like “interrogation tech- Sulick did discuss the chang- McGovern spoke to Fordham long to realize Michael Sulick I’d like to make a few conces- niques” (he’d never actually ing realities post-9/11, and even Anti-War Coalition members to had no intention of answering sions. First, as a student-run use the word “torture”) or “Af- talked about how the U.S. “re- brainstorm pertinent questions any of our kinds of questions, event (before which the admin- ghanistan and Pakistan,” which moved the regime and restored preceding the USG-sponsored ironic given that event promo- istration told student leaders to are current buzzwords in his the Shah [of Iran] to his throne” Michael Sulick lecture. Both tions quoted the Gos- Sulick, looking mildly surprised that his specialized line of in the 1950s, though he didn’t he and Sulick attended Ford- pel of John: “the truth audience expects him to talk about some- work. Instead, Su- clarify that this referred to the ham University, majored in and shall set you free,” as thing substantive. lick spoke vaguely elected Mossadegh government mastered Russian Language & Dan LoPreto (FCRH about how cool it that the CIA overthrew. Despite Literature, and spent decades Class of 2011) point- was to be the fi rst nods to his Jesuit upbringing, working for the CIA, but devi- ed out to me. The truth CIA offi cer to alight Sulick’s only acknowledgment ated paths when McGovern re- of the CIA-trained in the Soviet Re- of such morally dubious ac- tired and began to expose the guerillas who killed publics after 1991 tivities were brief mentions of CIA, believing it is no longer six Jesuits as well as and how the CIA the “moral compass” a job in what President Truman intend- thousands of civilians didn’t issue super- the CIA required, and the fact ed. For example, Sulick, as the in El Salvador (while high-tech cars, if that “public service requires Director of the National Clan- Fordham annually that’s what we ex- sacrifi ce and tough decisions,” destine Service, is in charge of sends students to Fort pected. This self- though he never provided any “covert action,” a euphemism Benning to protest declared “Fordham specifi c examples. for unmanned drones deployed such horrors) wasn’t boy” began with a While you’d think during over combat zones in Afghani- mentioned. Nor was shout-out to other Q&A we’d learn details about stan and Pakistan to search it said that the pro- CIA/Fordham al- exactly what Sulick’s been do- and destroy insurgents. Debra posed counterinsur- ums (clearly trying ing those three decades in the Sweet of the World Can’t Wait gency tactics in Iraq to raise a new army CIA, most of the hand-selected (an organization that repudi- have been called “the of CIA agents), like questions (Gordon screened the ates the occupations of Iraq El Salvador Method.” John Brennan and questions to limit irrelevant or and Afghanistan) told us about How about Sulick’s Ray McGovern. infl ammatory remarks, though Georgetown professor Gary position’s role in doz- Without mention- it smelled suspiciously of cen- Solis’s article in the Washing- ens of covert coups, ing he and Bren- sorship) were comparatively ton Post that claimed those CIA such as the 1973 nan’s infamous benign softball questions, ask- agents under Sulick’s aegis are overthrow of Chilean waterboarding tor- ing, for example, what being unlawful combatants. As civil- President Allende? ture program, he in the CIA is like. When some- ians, they lack uniforms and Never touched upon. began his lecture one asked about the unintended insignia, as well as clearance to You’d think he’d complain quell any protest planned), the by talking about the terrorists loss of civilian lives from drone participate directly in hostilities about how diffi cult it is to fi ght lecture focused on how Ford- who “threaten to destroy our warfare, Sulick joked: “Security according to the Geneva Con- terrorists using the tactics the ham infl uenced Sulick’s career, way of life,” and from there breach!” and didn’t answer. ventions. For the Q&A section CIA trained them (in the 1980s not his policy decisions. Sec- proceeded to gush about how The second time this pro- of the lecture, McGovern sug- the U.S.