The Drink Tank

Troubled Waters by Taral Wayne Sailor, my last re- also been overshoot- maining cat, gave me a ing her litter box, lot of grief last night. She forcing me to mop peed on the bed. Nor the floor about every was it the first time – it’s other day. I grieved a foul surprise she’s given over her premature- me a few times before, ly, though. There was but fortunately at inter- no repeat of the bed vals months apart. incident. And think- The first time ing rather than griev- Sailor peed my bed was ing worked out a simply a shock. I had solution to the prob- come back from a trip to lem with the box. find a standing puddle of Hitching a reeking urine in the mid- ride from a friend, I dle of my bed. Since I had bought an enormous been away a number of plastic storage box days for the Reno World- from Wal-Mart. It con, I’d left Sailor in the was about 22 inches care of Miriam, a lady long and 18 wide, down the hall. Although and should give all Miriam plainly hadn’t ne- the room even an glected her charge, Sailor arthritic cat needed may have been distressed to enter and turn by my absence. around. Indeed, it As they say, forewarned is forearmed. My washed. So I wrote the incident off. seemed to help – though Sailor still overshot, previous cat, Amber, was in the habit of showing The second time Sailor peed my the bed it was not nearly as often, and a stiff plastic tray her distress by inappropriate wetting, so before disturbed me more, however – because there under the front of the box caught her urine leaving for Reno I prepared for the possibility by was no reason for it. I worried that Sailor had whenever her business end still wasn’t inboard. placing a sheet of plastic cut under the bedcover. become senile at last, and there would be no Whenever Sailor misses, I lift the tray and empty As a result, only the lightweight cover had to be alternative but to have her put under. She had the piss into the toilet, then rinse it off under hot water. hideous yellow spot form the mattress and then of the “floods.” If she had not... I realized there So things were shipshape for another drying it. I never succeeded in completely eradi- might be no happy ending to this story. long while. Then Sailor both pissed and pooped cating the moisture, or the smell – especially the The 24 hours have passed uneventfully, on the bed. I stripped the bed down and laun- smell – but I was exhausted by that time, and and the situation with Sailor seems, for the time dered the sheets over the next couple of days. had to get some sleep. Ironically, I threw one of being, stable. I found a piece of board that’s she’s The mattress was protected by its rubberized Sailor’s old blankets over the damp spot before too old to jump over to put across the door. This cover, thank goodness, and only needed washing bedding down. turned out to be a better solution than keep- with soapy rags, rinsing, then given time to dry. Next morning, the smell of cat pee still ing the door closed – airing the room out will But then Sailor did it again, this time at lingered faintly in the air, so I stripped back the bring the day closer when every breath won’t an even shorter interval between acts of incon- cover again, and allowed the mattress to air out remind me why we flush toilets. That two-foot tinence. I had the fire drill down pat – remove all that day. As if all that weren’t enough motiva- high board wouldn’t have stopped Sailor for a the sheets and launder immediately, wash the tion to strangle the cat, the first thing I discov- moment when she was younger, of course. I protective mattress with soapy water, dry it with ered when I got up was that she had peed again shouldn’t have any trouble stepping over it my- hair dryer. It wasn’t fun, but by having a routine during the night – this time on the office chair self, either ... Except that I’m older too. *Sigh* at least it was quickly done. at my computer! Fortunately, I pamper my butt At least the board is easy to move. Then, just before I went to bed that with a cheap pillow, that had absorbed most of In the meantime, Sailor hasn’t wet any- night, I discovered she had gone again, this time the pee. It wasn’t too hard to wash it in the sink. thing else. Maybe she just had a Bad Fur Day. So, in a new spot! Twice in one day was an ominous A small spot on the chair itself I tackled with if there can be no happy ending in the long run, first. soapy water and a rag, and the results were at with luck there’s still a chapter or two left to her There were no sheets to wash this time least livable. story. – they were still drying from their soaking that Alas, even after the passing of a second Or, as Mehitabel the Cat might say, may- morning. I washed the mattress cover again with night, I can’t say the same for the bed. Despite be “there’s a dance in the old dame yet.” soapy water again and played the hair dryer over spraying the spot repeatedly – emptying the bet- it until it seemed dry ... only, whenever I pressed ter part of an aerosol can of Lysol onto it – it down on the dry surface, it became damp again still stinks. I can only hope the lingering odour ... as though something underneath was soaking fades with time. Fresh sheets will probably help through. This wasn’t supposed to happen. The mask the stink, too. cover was rubberized inside, remember? The strange thing is that Sailor seems On a hunch, I unzipped the cover and healthy, active, alert, happy and not distressed in peeled it back, only to discover that the rubber any way, so I can only chalk it up to age and had begun to decay and laid the middle of my a weak bladder. She is in her 17th year, after mattress wide open to a soaking. The mattress all, and that’s pretty old for a cat. Still, I can’t was disfigured with a huge, yellow, wet stain that spend hours every day cleaning my bed and fur- my finger came away wet from! nishings – I’m getting rather old myself, and tire Shit! Well... cat piss, anyway. This was easily! And so, for the next 24 hours, I kept my exactly the disaster I had felt protected from. bedroom door closed and Sailor under observa- I spent the next three hours washing the tion to see if she’d gotten over her sudden bout Words and Pictures by Howeird “Everyone should have a white paper “You can see that the line stays on the Earlier in the presentation, Alex Larkin strip with a sticky end”, said the tall, lanky young outside of the loop, it never crosses the plane. had shown a few slides of a chameleon and how man in front of the room. His face was multi- Now take the loop apart, give the paper a half the TARDIS might use refraction to camouflage colored – he was standing between the projec- twist, and re-attach it. That’s a Möbius strip.” Ev- itself. In early Doctor Who episodes, she noted, tor and the screen. eryone tried drawing a line again, but this time the TARDIS had a working chameleon circuit, “Take the sticky end and make a loop. it covered both sides of the paper, crossing the and could be made to look like almost anything: Now draw a line along the outside of the loop. I plane. A rock, even a whale. Several kids shouted out see we need more pens.” This, Matthew explained, is one way that the circuit had become stuck on a 1960’s The young man is Matthew Rowley, a a wormhole might be created, with a twist in London police box. There’s a whole new genera- Stanford Graduate Student in Particle Physics space. He had a couple of slides to show what a tion of Whovians out there! at SLAC and he is half of the duo who are ex- wormhole might look like, one which went from Alex is a Research Associate at the Stan- plaining some of The Science of Doctor Who to a lab in Germany to a beach in Southern France. ford Medical Center, the other half of the duo more than 100 students, parents and teachers in Next, he called up a volunteer from the and the main presenter for the evening. To dem- the performing arts center of Christa McAuliffe audience. Only a hundred hands went up. The onstrate the refraction technique, she had two school in Saratoga. The presentation was given lucky girl who was chosen was given a pair of glasses filled with liquid, and two glass rods (stir- October 15, and was sponsored by The McAu- scissors, and asked to cut the Möbius strip in half rers?). When she placed the first rod in the first liffe Upper Grade Committee and the SLAC lengthwise. Now it had two twists.

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