Raising Your Lifelong Learners Do Your Kids See You As a Lifelong Learner? It Is So Important That Your Kids See You Learning and Actively Seeking Knowledge

A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners

By Colleen Kessler

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Find out about additional works by this author at www.RaisingLifelongLearners.com Contents

3 Title of the book This book is dedicated to all parents out there striving to raise lifelong learners, creative and critical thinkers, and the best kids they possibly can. Thank you for all you do. Letterfrom the author

irst, I want to say thank you. Raising kids today can be a challenge, and raising them to be adults who love to learn can seem like an impossible dream. There are so many things that clamor for our attention, and helping our kids be independent thinkers often gets lost in the shuffle of doing what everyone else is doing. You’re doing a great job, and picking up an eBook Fto help you be a better parent shows that – thanks! In conversations with other parents – homeschoolers and non-homeschoolers alike – I hear them say that they want their kids to become lifelong learners, too.

But what does it mean to be raising lifelong learners? What does it look like, from a practical standpoint?

Wikipedia defines lifelong learning as, “the on-going, voluntary, and self-motivated pursuit of knowledge,” and goes on to explain that it promotes “active citizenship and personal development.”

I agree, and would take it a step further. I think that yes, a lifelong learner is an active citizen and always in pursuit of knowledge. More importantly, though, I think a lifelong learner is a critical thinker.

He or she can look at the world and see what works and what doesn’t… and then figure out ways to make it better.

Lifelong learners are world-changers.

I want to raise my kids to look at the world and change it for the better. I don’t want them to settle for what they’re told it should look like — I want them to be the change we need.

I want them to be lifelong learners who are ready to take action.

How about you?

Join me – let’s raise a new generation of learners, thinkers, and doers. And let’s empower them to change the world for the better.

5 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Cultivating a Learning-Rich Environment

“My child just isn’t a reader.” “My son has no interest in history.” “My daughter loathes science.” “My kid hates learning of any kind.” “It’s such a struggle that it doesn’t seem worth it.”

I’m saddened when I hear parents talk about their kids like this, as if the genetic propensity to learn is what it is, and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. I’m not a psychologist or a brain researcher, though I’ve worked with counselors and researchers alike, and have read widely in the field to better understand how kids learn. Despite my lack of PhD, I don’t believe that there is anything present at birth that determines a child will be a scientist, store clerk, reader, writer, or cook. Yes, I firmly believe that children have different abilities and intellects. There are gifted children with exceptionally high IQs and children with disabilities that make learning new things incredibly challenging. And there are kids that struggle with both. But, becoming a lifelong learner is not dependent on ability level. It’s a value we, as parents, can instill in our kids by cultivating A learning-rich learning-rich environments, and modeling the environment is behavior of a lifelong learner. one that

A learning-rich environment is one that cultivates {and cultivates {and even celebrates} curiosity. even celebrates} Putting away the books to watch the plumber jack-hammer a hole into the basement curiosity. floor {ugh}, experimenting with blocks and paints in the bathtub, digging for toy dinosaurs in a container of cornmeal… all of these things encourage children to think about their environment and ask questions.

6 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Recently, my seven year old asked me what would happen if Joining together with groups of like- minded families to create rich she microwaved a banana. I’ve never microwaved a banana before, learning experiences for your and have never wondered about it, but I told her to try it and draw or children can be powerful. write what happens in her “science notebook.” Something seemingly simple – like She did, and felt validated in her curiosity and now regards pulling a few friends together to play herself as a scientist-in-training. She then went on to microwave it with science for the day can have an incredible impact on your child’s for increasingly longer periods of time, try the experiment with development. The fun and shared peeled and unpeeled bananas, and then froze bananas in different experience, centered around a learning ways. activity like the elephant’s toothpaste Little things like giving permission to be curious about experiment above, tells your child that bananas matter to kids. learning and play go hand-in-hand. It lets him know that learning is fun, and Yes, little things matter. And sometimes the littlest things doesn’t need to be relegated to “school matter the most… like talking. time.” All of my kids like to talk – even the baby, who will babble loudly as he tries to be heard over the din. Talking, storytelling, and sharing plans is crucial to developing readers, writers, and thinkers. Even if you’d prefer silence every now and then.

7 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Listen to your kids spin their imaginations… and then encourage them to tell you more. And more. And still more. As parents, we naturally encourage talk when our kids are really little, reporting to family and friends all the words our kids are saying, but this celebration of language acquisition tapers off as they get older. In fact, I find myself telling my kids to “be quiet, for the love of God!” I want peace, and I forget that they’re spreading the wings of their imagination when they prattle on and on about what they’ll invent when they’re older and how they’ll be a homeschooling mom who creates a cure for all disease while making food from scratch for every meal and snack.

Read, write, and celebrate play. Give your children activities like making playdough playscapes for Honestly, the best way to cultivate a learning-rich miniature dinosaurs. With activities environment is to fill your home with books, share a love of the like this, they’ll use their imaginations written word, and celebrate the play in which your child engages. and will naturally act out rich stories, Get down on the floor with them and act out a trip to the learning story structure, creative farm to pick up produce. Play with light and shadows. Read a thinking skills, compromise {as little brother begs to join in and wants to book… and then 10 more, and bake a cake to go along with it. Play play his own way}, and they’ll learn that games. it’s actually easy to create their own simple fun with everyday materials.

Ask Your Children Questions

Listen to their answers. Ask them to elaborate, where they got their ideas, why they think that way, and so on.

And answer their questions.

Take each one seriously, and think about your answer. Show them you value their thinking and you’ll teach them to value themselves as active learners.

Share Experiences With Your Child Sometimes it really is the simplest of things that excite your children about learning. For this little animal lover it was a subscription to the Junior Explorers Club. She receives an animal mystery in the mail that includes trinkets, an activity book, animal fact cards, and a code to solve an online mystery while learning about habitats from around the world. We do this together once a month for an afternoon.

8 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Cultivating a Love of Literacy

We live in a print-rich world. From the signs on the highway to the packaging surrounding the products we buy, kids need to be strongly literate if they are to be active citizens. Therefore, our first job as parents who are cultivating the next generation of world-changers is to instill in them a love of literacy.

We want our children to read widely with lots of variety. We hope they’ll write – their hopes, dreams, thoughts, and complaints, journals, diaries, articles, letters to the editor, blog posts, and books – we want them to contribute to the world in tangible ways, and to do that, they need to love words.

So how can we help them? Especially if they’ve already developed an aversion to the written word?

Start at Home For little ones, verbalize what you’re thinking. “I’m making cupcakes right now, do you want to help me? Great! Here, squish this piece of candy right down in the middle, we’re going to bake it inside the cupcake. Won’t that be yummy?”

It doesn’t matter if they’re answering you, you’re helping them build language skills.

When they get a little bigger, ask questions. “What do you think will happen when we squish this piece of candy into the cupcake batter and bake it? Will it stay whole? Will it melt? Why?”

9 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Continue that type of talking, but this time, verbalize their thoughts for them. “Here, you do it. Follow the instructions in the cook book. Tell me what you’re doing and what you need me to do. Oh, you need baking soda? Why do you think we put baking soda in cupcakes? What does it do to the batter? Think about that time we made a volcano with baking soda and vinegar. Do you have an idea now?”

Have Dinner Together

I read a book awhile ago, Awakening Your Child’s Genius by Thomas Armstrong, PhD. In the foreword Shari Lewis writes, “A couple of years ago, there was a study to determine what caused children to get high scores on the SATs. IQ, social circumstances, and economic factors all seemed less important Let them read – anywhere and everywhere. than another, subtler factor. Youngsters who got the highest SAT scores all regularly had dinner with their parents.” In this photo, the girls are outside, in the backyard, in a tent, reading their new LeapFrog LeapReader 3D book. So what does that mean? By creating a little novelty, their interest was piqued, and they read out there for It means that YOU have the power to help your child become hours. And can’t wait to do it again. a lifelong learner, critical thinker, and intelligent communicator by giving your family dedicated time. Sit down and talk. Share stories. Cultivate conversation. Play word games. We keep them at the table.

Early literacy skills are based on oral communication.

10 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Fill your house with words. Buy books. Go to the library. Have several eReaders to bring with you when you travel.

When your child is surrounded by books and other reading materials, he or she will naturally turn to the written word to find things out and for entertainment.

We have boxes of children’s books, bookshelves in every room, and are now transitioning to eReaders The Case for eReaders simply because we are living Electronic reading devices make it easy to take your library on the in Teeny House and don’t go without taking up a ton of space in your bags. In fact, we have a basic Kindle, an iPad, and reader apps on all of our computers. have a lot of space to hold all Our kids have received used Kindle Fires for their birthdays, and of the books I’d like to have. use them for all sorts of things. Plus… books are often offered for free on Kindle.

Read those books TO your kids. Okay… it seems like a no-brainer, but I’m going to say it anyway.

READ those books to your kids. Homeschoolers, put away the workbooks, curl up with a book about pioneer times and read history to your child. Let them read it to you. Have several books going at a time.

My kids are currently listening to a biography of Ronald Regan read by my husband at bedtime, The Secret Garden read by me at lunchtime, and a variety of other picture books throughout the day.

My five year old reads to herself using our new LeapReader and loves tackling the basket of TAG books we have.

Read, read, read… and read some more. The foundation of early literacy skills is reading. Kids need to be read to often. They need to see books as the answer to everything – entertainment, information, and imagination.

When they learn that the answer to all of their questions and dreams are in the pages {e-ink or paper} of books, they can accomplish anything. And they’ll be lifelong learners.

11 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners The Importance of Play Play allows children to use their creativity while developing their imagination, dexterity, and physical, cognitive, and emotional strengths. Play is important to healthy brain development. It is through play that children at a very early age engage and interact in the world around them. Journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics, Jan 1, 2007

By play, I don’t mean video games, toys that do things for kids, or even board games. Sometimes I worry about the toys that fill the shelves of toy stores and big box stores today. When playthings come with scripts and directions, kids are merely acting out someone else’s ideas.

Something is lost… the imagination. Finding Worlds

Kids, especially those who are used to having their play directed, might complain, “there’s nothing to do.” They are, in a way, addicted to the computers, talking toys, and television shows that permeate our home lives today. We need to help guide our children to be resourceful and active play-ers, and then let them run with it.

There’s something to be said about letting your kids loose in the backyard or giving them a few cardboard boxes and stepping back to see what they do with the freedom.

Will the backyard become a jungle? A forest? Or a calm local park in which doll tea party picnics occur? Or, like ours recently, a LEGO version of Man vs. Wild in which Lego Bear Grylls was subjected to all sorts of trials before being summarily rescued by Lego Tony Stark?

12 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners What will become of those boxes you packed your groceries in at Aldi? Or that Amazon just delivered? A cave? A multi-level apartment building in which dolls, princesses, and animals live in harmony?

If you continue to limit the toys and electronic devices that play for them, your children will learn to play creatively. And their creativity will grow – astounding you. And they’ll ask for those devices less and less often.

Real play will become more fun and engaging.

Encouraging Imagination

My five year old was bored the other day. The toddler was sleeping in the Ergo Carrier, my seven year old was with a friend, and we were at my oldest son’s FLL Team meeting. And, as it was chilly and damp outside, I wasn’t going to give her the iPad until we went inside. For the moment the boys were talking strategy and working on a 4-foot by 8-foot practice table and were in an unheated garage. Play is the work of childhood. Play- based learning in the early years will set I told her to explore. your child up for a lifetime of wanting to find out about new things. Explore, She found an old, ripped net and a rock. I saw she was learn, create, and do it all with your engaged, and turned to listen to the team so I’d know child, looking at the world with fresh what to reinforce with my son before the next meeting. eyes.

But my daughter kept drawing all of the moms’ After all, when was the last time you attention away from the boys. truly embraced the beauty of the day and dance in a fountain like this? Isn’t The rock clunked in corners and on the driveway as she about time you did? tossed it and went after it. I heard her mutter and pounce. Again, and again. She crawled on the dirty, cold cement floor, and hid behind boxes. When I finally could talk to her without disturbing the team, I asked her to tell me the story of her play.

13 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners She spun a tale of lion hunting and told how Keep Being Selective the rock was a baby lion that continued to run away from its mommy. She’d been hired When our kids are little, we parents focus by the cub’s mommy as a “baby-lion-hunter” intently on the characteristics of the toys and and kept recapturing it only to have it escape playthings we purchase for them. We want through the hole in the net right as she to make sure that the things we bring almost got back to its home… every time! into the house are going to have value for them. That they will grow their minds, But, finally, knowing that time was short and be safe, and teach them various skills. she’d have to go inside, and wanting the lion cub and its mommy to be reunited, she But, when our kids get older and start asking clasped her hand on the hole and for specific toys, it’s natural to step back and successfully brought it home in the “nick of let them take a more active role in choosing time.” their playthings.

Now, my kids are just as interested in Is it the right move, though? screens as the next kid, but I’m hoping that by continuing to limit them and encourage {and validate} their Who is really influencing their imaginations, that I’ll have more stories decisions? Likely it’s a friend, a movie, or a like this to tell. smart advertising campaign. Right? And I’m totally guilty of allowing these outside influencers to take over the role of guiding my children’s wants.

10 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners In fact, up until I finished researching the things I wanted to share in this book, I handed my kids the stack of toy catalogs that just came in the mail, telling them to start thinking about the two or three things they wanted most for Christmas.

I just threw them away.

It’s just not right. My girls have been playing happily with several cardboard boxes that they’ve turned into a mansion for their dolls for over a week. Now, they’re both coveting a dollhouse that costs over a hundred dollars – just because they saw it in the catalog. We have a dollhouse! And they play more with the boxes than they do the house.

If your child really wants something, ask him or her why.

Like I mentioned earlier, each of our kids received a Kindle Fire for a recent birthday. Before I was sold on this idea, though, I sat down with each of them so they could explain to me why I should purchase an expensive electronic device for each of them to have as their own.

Open the dialogue and help your kids think through their wants, needs, and requests. It’ll be great for all of you.

Play with your Kids The almighty to-do list often keeps us too busy to play with our children, but it’s important. Board games, imaginative play, hikes, catch, Frisbee, and simple things like taking a walk and pretending you’re exploring an enchanted forest all build your relationship with your children. It teaches them that you are there for them always, and that they are important to you. Take some time – even if you need to schedule it – and play with your kids today…and every day.

15 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners The Presentation

I used to keep my toys in a big toy chest when I was young. Things were tossed inside and jumbled up. I lost pieces, things broke, but it didn’t matter to me because I was doing what I was told and cleaning up. My books were a different story. I had bookshelves made out of wooden milk crates and lovingly painted for me. I reverently put all of my books, spine out, away each time I finished a story.

Why the difference?

The presentation. When things are messy and thrown in a heap, we naturally assign less importance to them than those things that have a specific place and method of storage. And guess what? I read more often than I played with my toys.

Kids will use what is easily accessible and inviting.

Did you see my post on organizing tiny spaces? The premise applies to all spaces. Everything needs a place. And, honestly, when you’re organizing your kids’ playthings and their rooms and playrooms, it’s best to have them help you Lots of open space, simple furniture and bins do the work. They can see the effort it took, and will be that on shelves… This type of playroom design leaves much more likely to keep everything organized so they don’t a place for everything, while allowing lots of space have to spend hours cleaning and purging with you again. {mentally and physically} for open-ended play.

Everything Has a Place

We have clear bins for all of our toys, art supplies, and building things. Wedgits are stored in a different box than wooden building blocks.

Snap dolls are grouped with their clothes in a plastic Sterilite container.

Science supplies are separate from science tools because while my kids might not need access to the books, videos, and specimen we’ve collected at all times, you never know when an occasion will call for a magnifying glass.

16 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Take it Deeper

The Choice Great educators know that the key to deepening the learning for kids to As we live in a time of excess, you’re question. probably like me and have way too many things for your kids. And, when you have several kids, that stuff grows Tell me more. exponentially every year. While we are What else can you add? working diligently to simplify and trim I love the tree you drew. Can you observe down that excess, we still have a lot of any other colors in the trees outside? How stuff. can you enhance your drawing? What else might you find near a tree? The problem is that too many What happened next? choices can be as harmful to kids as Why? the lack of a rich-learning When? Where? environment can be.

It’s endless, really, the sheer volume of When kids have too many choices, they questions you can pose to your kids. You tend to rush through their play so they can extend their thinking on just about can get to everything, not allowing any topic. But what about their play? themselves to truly engage deeply with one activity.

My husband is great at this. We keep Legos, Wedgits, Lincoln Logs, dress-up clothes, and a toy When our son was very young, he was kitchen available to the kids at all times, obsessed about all things train. He never and now work everything else in on a wanted to play with anything else rotating basis. When the Playmobil but wooden train sets or GeoTrax. pirates or the Little People sets reappear, they’re like new toys My husband would play with him for long and imagination is rekindled stretches of time, and then he started pulling out the Little People farm things and adding bits here and there to the set ups.

In time, the basement was filled with tracks leading to and from a big elaborate farm set up. The trains went to the farm to pick up livestock, food, and resources to take into the city and back. It was still train play – just deepened.

My husband took our son’s love of trains, validated it, and took it further.

Next time your child is at play, sit back and observe. Think about how can you help him take it further. Your role isn’t to do the thinking for him, it’s to help facilitate the elaboration that will help him solve problems and seek answers later in life.

17 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Growing Healthy Work Habits

I used to think that work and play were separate. That if you worked hard and long, it paid off in the end. It might not be fun, but it was worth it. Now, I think differently.

It is important to work hard – to have a good, solid work ethic. Diligence is important and something to strive for. But, I don’t necessarily think work and play need to be isolated anymore. I’m striving to teach my kids that they can love what they do, and that work and play can coexist.

As I write this book, I’m sitting in the quiet study alcove at our local library. I can hear the kids in the children’s section, in a muffled way, running around the museum-like play structures and talking about the computer games they’re playing and the books they’re choosing. The man on the cell phone {who, unknowingly prompted me to ask if a study room was available} murmurs on.

I’m at play.

I want my kids to know that, just because writing is my work, doesn’t make it any less my play.

I’d write if I didn’t get paid for it. I’d write books if they never got published, lessons if they were never used by my kids or others, and stories if they were never read.

I love to write. It’s my joy that I’ve been able to work as a freelance writer for the past seven years.

We often think, as parents, that it is our job to hammer home the importance of hard work to our kids during school time or chore time. But, what about play time?

18 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Yes, we need our kids to value a job well done. We want them to know and understand the importance of clean kitchen counters, fed and watered pets, and clean clothes neatly folded in drawers. But, I’d argue that we need them to value a creative Lego design, or a tall, balanced block tower, or a lovely chalk pastel, too.

I don’t want my kids to see the good life as fancy clothes, an Chores Can Be Fun expensive car, and time to sit around by the pool {though I don’t see anything wrong with Do you remember the fun of helping to rake the having any of those things}. I leaves up on a fall day so you could be the first want them to understand that one to jump into the leaf pile? Making chores a the best life is one where they family activity and creating a game out of them work hard on work and can go a long way to getting the kids to buy in to projects that they find chore time. valuable. There can be a blurry line between work and play. Sure, there will always be things kids would rather be doing than a certain subject they disdain. But, what a gift we can give them when we celebrate all work as valuable. “Hooray! Your math lesson today is one I know you’ll understand quickly. Let’s focus hard on it so we have lots of time to devote to our volcano unit study. I can’t wait to show you how the Earth would look if we cut it in half down the middle.”

Chores can be tough though. I know that I am met with grumbles often when I tell my kids to do something that will help around the house. Like I’ve written before, though, children need chores. They need to be made to feel as if they are a contributing member of the family community.

Ideally, I’d like my kids to see that things need done around the house {setting and clearing the table, filling the dog’s empty water bowl, or bringing the clean laundry upstairs}, but I know that this isn’t likely to happen without some guidance. Doing simple chores like these isn’t about a “job,” it’s about recognizing that things need to be done to keep a household running, and as members of that household, they should help out.

And, as I tell my kids, that empathetic thinking is what leads to true maturity.

I encourage my kids to have a great work ethic by providing them opportunities to practice working hard without grumbling. They have simple morning, afternoon, and evening chores. We also do thing as a family, like clean up before company comes, rake leaves in the yard, organize the basement, or other big tasks that need done.

19 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Using Projects to Instill Great Work Habits

Did you know that projects and hobbies, and even musical instruments can have an even greater impact on developing work ethics in kids than chores?

Every project your kids get involved in has the potential to lead to an incredible body of work. And, you often don’t know exactly what will spark the diligence.

Here’s an example—

Recently, I discovered a phenomenal site, Mama’s Learning Corner, full of printables made by the talented Lauren Hill. Her site is awesome, and I’ve downloaded just about every one of her printable packs and eBooks.

I’d been looking for a painless way of encouraging my oldest son to grow his vocabulary so I downloaded and printed a stack of her vocabulary printables.

I wrote a long obscure word on the whiteboard, handed him the page and told him he needed to report to all of us at lunch time, and after his report, anyone who used the word in an organic sentence could have a piece of candy.

And then I forgot about it…

Until lunchtime when my son came to the table with the worksheet and the iPad. He shared his worksheet, definition, sentence, and illustration, and then he showed us a stop- motion animation he’d created to demonstrate the word. And then he begged me to give him new words everyday.

20 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Since then, he’s written dozens of those printables and created corresponding animations. His vocabulary is growing and so is his sisters’. He works hard to come up with creative ideas and has run with it, creating videos for just about everything he needs to do.

His work has become his play.

By the same token, music lessons can help kids develop a work ethic, but they can also help a child learn bad habits. That same son wanted to play the flute. So we found a homeschool band, had him tested on it, rented the instrument, and started lessons.

Playing the flute is tough. And practicing daily is a challenge for a kid. And, while some parents would argue that it is the child’s responsibility to practice, I disagree. We can do damage to our kids’ developing work habits by not stepping in and guiding them. I don’t agree with nagging, but setting up an expectation {or a chart} that clearly shows the child that he must complete his practice before he can play or have free time still keeps the child accountable while setting him up for success.

This comes back to tapping into your child’s interests and being flexible.

21 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Developing a Love of Reading

A reader is a person who loves to read for its sake, not because it’s been assigned. I think that, if we truly want to raise lifelong learners, we need to raise readers first. And not just readers… readers who LOVE reading.

I tend to keep the concepts of developing literacy skills separate from becoming a reader. I know most of us sit on the couch, curled up with our littles and read to them. There’s nothing better than having a snuggly 2, 3, or 4 year old leaning in, fiddling with your hair, and laughing together over some of Amelia Bedelia’s antics.

When was the last time you sat and cuddled with a book and your 10 year old? Your 13 year old?

And, I’m talking to myself here, too. We’re all guilty of this. “Here’s the book you need to read, why don’t you go find a quiet space and read the first chapter.” Once kids get proficient at reading, we let them go. And, there’s a place for that, but we’re not talking about raising kids that know how to read.

We want to raise good readers who love the written word.

They won’t get there if reading always happens in isolation. Reading is social. Books and characters need to be talked about. They need to be shared.

Ask:

What’s going on in that book you’re reading?

Tell me what happened today – I tried to get to the book last night and catch up to where you are, but I was just too tired. Can you fill me in?

That main character is something else. Why do you think she chooses to do those things?

What would you do differently?

22 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Good readers read a lot. They listen to others read. They have several books going at a time. They check piles of books out of the library and rack up large fines for overdue books {oh, wait… that’s just me}.

They have shelves of books, eBooks on devices and computers, magazine subscriptions. And they always look to Choose a wide variety of books for your kids to read. read about something The key is to know your child and the books they’re reading. Stay involved and talk about their books. Read they need to learn first, their books with them, before they do, or at night after they before doing anything put them down. But encourage them to read often. else. You can help facilitate this.

Build in reading rituals. We read at bedtime – that’s an easy one. But, I also read aloud to the kids at the breakfast table and at the lunch table. My littlest takes a nap each day, while the others take quiet time, build “nests” of pillows, and read. They also read in the car on long trips.

We also have the ritual that, as I’m not a morning person and would much prefer lounging in bed, if you’re up before me you can come snuggle in my bed with some books. On mornings after I’ve been up to meet a deadline or with a fussing baby, this extra time to lay in my comfy bed before starting the day is welcome, and my kids love having that quiet time with me.

Books and reading need to be warm and fuzzy.

And you know what, they don’t all need to be classics. I may get negative comments over this one, but I don’t think that there is anything wrong with books by contemporary authors. I love classics, too. We’ve read A Little Princess, The Secret Garden, The Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings, Swiss Family Robinson, and more. But we’ve also read and loved Harry Potter, the Who Was? biography series, The Magic Tree House series, books by Beverly Cleary, Mary Ryan, Nancy MacArthur, Roald Dahl, and Matt Christopher, among others.

I think it’s so important that kids relate to the stories they’re reading and have good conversations about them. There are times to stretch them and have them read difficult books, but for the most part they need to read and enjoy in order to become lifelong readers and learners.

23 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Writing vs. Handwriting

People ask me all the time what I am doing to teach my kids writing. And, to be honest, it’s an area in which I struggle. The whole “shoemaker’s kids going shoeless thing… this writer’s kids don’t learn writing.”

Or do they?

I think it’s so important, first, that we take a good, hard look at what we are considering writing. Because, to be honest, I think many of us – parents, homeschoolers, and even classroom teachers – mistake handwriting for writing.

Writing is a creative process, handwriting is a physical one.

When we tie the two together, we place limits on a child’s creativity. In order to raise our kids to become lifelong learners, we need to encourage their creativity and give them developmentally appropriate ways to express it.

A child who struggles with the physical act of writing his thoughts on paper can type, dictate while a parent writes for him, or use software like Dragon Naturally Speaking to get his thoughts on paper. The ultimate goal in writing is to have children who are able to craft stories with compelling beginnings, middles, and endings. And the goal for nonfiction writing like reports is to be able to pull together facts that are substantiated, but still interesting to read.

24 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Handwriting still needs to be addressed because there is a great deal of brain research that suggests a connection between fluid writing {like cursive} and creative and critical thinking. And, let’s face it, there is a high likelihood that your child will need to fill out some type of form or write a list at some point in his future.

As a parent, I struggle with this.

I want my kids to be able to pick up a pen and notebook, and write. But if I just give them the physical supplies and not the mental tools, they’ll fail right off the bat.

Try this – use lapbooks to focus research and writing on topics of your kid’s interest because the mini books are, well… mini.

Each one is designed to present a bite-sized amount of information that is just enough for a reluctant writer to write before his arm withers, dies, and falls off, completely useless for the rest of his life.

Really, though, I urge you in your quest to grow your kids into lifelong learners, to watch and adapt to them. If writing becomes a struggle, find ways to make it fun. Don’t confuse writing with Play games, encourage your little one to play princess handwriting. and tell you her life’s story, act things out, and talk. Writing is the creative act of coming up with stories and using one’s creativity Above all, enjoy their creativity and tell them that and imagination. Crafting a cohesive they’re great and creative writers. When they ask why story from beginning to a rising climax, you’re calling them a writer when they aren’t and onto a satisfying end is the “writing,” explain that writers {authors} don’t pick up important point in teaching writing. a pen and put it to paper every time they craft a story. Handwriting is the physical act of Sometimes they dictate it, or type it, or use an iPad, or putting pen to paper. There is much their phone. brain research that links creativity development to fluid movements like those used in cursive writing, so it is still And any way is okay – as long as your child remembers to an important skill to teach. keep imagining… and researching… and discovering.

Forget about the physical act of writing for a bit {come back to it, but don’t make it the focus}, and embrace the creativity.

25 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Conclusion

Throughout this book, we’ve examined many aspects of what it takes to raise your kids to be lifelong learners. All of that is great information. It helps us be intentional parents. It gives us a compass against which to measure the choices we make regarding our kids’ childhood experiences.

That information is valuable… but it’s secondary.

Here’s the thing – if we’re not modeling lifelong learning, our kids will not embrace that lifestyle. If we don’t seek knowledge, read, and write as we live, our kids will chalk our instructions up as just something we’re saying. They won’t internalize it.

If we want our kids to be readers, we have to read. If we want our kids to be writers, we have to write. If we want our kids to be lifelong learners, we have to be lifelong learners too.

What are you doing to show your kids that you value reading? Do you pull out a magazine or a book in the evening instead of turning on the television? Do you talk with them about books and stories and characters? If your child asks a question, do you take him to the library to find a book on the subject?

It’s simple – you show your kids that you value books when you read them.

Let your kids see you writing, even if it’s as simple as taking the time to write out the things you’re grateful for each night or a wake up message on the bathroom mirror in dry erase marker.

Raising Your Lifelong Learners Do your kids see you as a lifelong learner? It is so important that your kids see you learning and actively seeking knowledge. They will value it if you do.

Sit down with them when you put on a video about Pompeii and the Mount Vesuvius eruption, and talk about what you didn’t know. Learn alongside of them – this is one of my favorite things about homeschooling. When we delve into a topic, we all learn.

My kids know that I go to at least one conference and take one class each year. I’ve taken classes on science and nature writing, other types of writing, have attended and spoken at blog conferences, children’s writing conferences, and education conventions.

I value learning. I’m a lifelong learner.

My kids will be too. And so will yours…

26 A Parent’s Guide to Raising Lifelong Learners Colleen is a former teacher of gifted and talented children who prayed for nice, average kids, never dreamed of leaving the classroom, and thought homeschooling was weird.

Since God has a sense of humor, she now finds herself homeschooling her four highly gifted and twice- exceptional children while working from home. She’s published dozens of books for kids, parents, and teachers, and writes about homeschooling, parenting gifted kids, and hands-on learning and fun for all ages at Raising Lifelong Learners while trying desperately, and unsuccessfully, to stay one step ahead of her children {and their messes}.

You can find her avoiding housework by playing around on Pinterest and chatting on Twitter, Facebook, and Google Plus.