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Organising Intimacy Exploring Heterosexual Singledoms at Swedish Singles Activities Organising Intimacy Exploring Heterosexual Singledoms at Swedish Singles Activities Andreas Henriksson Faculty of Arts and Social Sciences Sociology DISSERTATION | Karlstad University Studies | 2014:54 Organising Intimacy Exploring Heterosexual Singledoms at Swedish Singles Activities Andreas Henriksson DISSERTATION | Karlstad University Studies | 2014:54 Organising Intimacy - Exploring Heterosexual Singledoms at Swedish Singles Activities Andreas Henriksson DISSERTATION Karlstad University Studies | 2014:54 urn:nbn:se:kau:diva-33658 ISSN 1403-8099 ISBN 978-91-7063-592-2 © The author Distribution: Karlstad University Faculty of Arts and Social Sciences Department of Social and Psychological Studies SE-651 88 Karlstad, Sweden +46 54 700 10 00 Print: Universitetstryckeriet, Karlstad 2014 WWW.KAU.SE Contents 1. INTRODUCTION Defining singles activities ................................................................................................................. 11 Singles activities in historical perspective ...................................................................................... 17 " "&""*&"&!;C'!'*%.,!333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333<: !!&&!&'+'.33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333<< "% %333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333<> %&22!&#%&"!"'!#%'&3333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333<A &'"%."'%"&-*'.33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333<C * %."&'"%-#"&33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333=; Singles activities and contemporary research ................................................................................ 33 !' .!#%&"!33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333== !&'+'&!'%"&-*'.33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333=B #&"&!&'+'&3333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333>; A note on pronouns .......................................................................................................................... 42 Questions and disposition ................................................................................................................ 43 2. EXAMINING SINGLES ACTIVITIES Multi-sited ethnography as sampling methodology ...................................................................... 46 Mixed methods .................................................................................................................................. 51 Ethnomethodological contextualisation .......................................................................................... 53 Evaluating the use of methods ......................................................................................................... 54 &%+'"!&3333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333?? !'%+,&333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333@< Surveying singles ....................................................................................................................... 71 Validity .............................................................................................................................................. 77 '#&"%+'.&#'"%&%$*&'"!&3333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333AA +% &*%&'"!%&+'.33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333B: Interpreting the data ........................................................................................................................ 81 %&!'!'%&*'&33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333B? Ethical considerations ...................................................................................................................... 86 3. INTIMACY AND RELATIONALITY Organising ......................................................................................................................................... 89 Personal life and (non-)relationality ............................................................................................... 93 The phenomenology of intimacy ..................................................................................................... 98 *'/"! !!!' '%'"!&#&33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333CC '%*'*%"!' '-#%!3333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333;:; !$*!&&&!' .3333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333;:> Organising intimacy ....................................................................................................................... 107 Intimacy with and against personal life ........................................................................................ 108 Illouz and the intimate 20th century .............................................................................................. 110 !'.!'-#%!"!" .33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333;;< In closing .......................................................................................................................................... 114 4. SINGLES EVENTS: NEGOTIATING LIMINALITY Leave everything behind ................................................................................................................ 116 Crowds and speed dating logics .................................................................................................... 118 Downplaying difference ................................................................................................................. 125 Intimacy as therapy: liberating the calculating mind ................................................................. 130 Men who look at women and a tale of two boats ......................................................................... 134 Conclusions ..................................................................................................................................... 139 5. MONOTOPIA: RECONSTRUCTING INTERNET DATING Constricting gazes ........................................................................................................................... 141 Singles therapeutics online ............................................................................................................. 144 Persons and individuals online ...................................................................................................... 148 Interlinking spaces and places ....................................................................................................... 150 What did the members do? ............................................................................................................ 154 Conclusions ..................................................................................................................................... 158 6. FILOS: SINGLES WITH RELATIONSHIPS Therapy and hetero-doxical possibilities ...................................................................................... 159 Remaining single in the face of coupledom .................................................................................. 162 Groups within groups ..................................................................................................................... 165 Conclusions ..................................................................................................................................... 168 7. SINGLE LIFE AND NON-RELATIONALITY Substituting family ......................................................................................................................... 171 Avoiding future adjustments ......................................................................................................... 176 Concerned with health ................................................................................................................... 181 Sexual difference as intimacy ........................................................................................................ 186 Age, widowhood, and divorcees .................................................................................................... 189 Conclusions ..................................................................................................................................... 193 8. CONCLUSIONS Organising intimacy ....................................................................................................................... 195 Space and place ............................................................................................................................... 197 Relationalities .................................................................................................................................. 200 Hetero-doxicality and singles activities ........................................................................................ 204 Research on courtship and singles ...............................................................................................
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