The girl with bright blue hair FEW evenings ago, as A I waited for a taxi I found myself standing next to a pretty girl with bright blue hair. (I suppose it was a wig.) Her eyelids had' been painted to match, and there was' even a blue tint to her eyebrows. And I thought—believe it or not- how attractive she looked, and in a] odd way even rather domestic, as though she might at any moment delve into her bag and bring out her knitting. On the following day, I saw a pretty girl with bright grey hair. She was hardly out of her teens. It wasn't a wig; it was her own hair, quite ob right viously dyed and silvered. And she didn*t look in the least attractive, nor, most certainly, domes tic ! She looked dreadful. Like a silly perverse child who had strayed into a world where she did not belong. •n-...::
Ladies^ beware! •^"^ ^HY was the blue right and the grey wrong? I
think one can answer that without '*«»."? tying oneself up in psychological knots. The blue was right because it was a ^ fantasy, a fairy story . . . like dressing up. The grey was wrong because.it was too close to life; it was a grim X, reminder of what was to come. Moral for les Girls? Go on dressing up. But be careful! ;^r • wrong MORE PAGES FROM BEVERLEY'S DAY-TO-DAY DIARY NEXT WEEK ,j?.'26 Teaching nSiJiiV^=^"9^'^^ Overseas IISI^^^' /LiOye BWaflf^:r' ^x;: *'k fawafda ''^^'^ ,28 The Subtlety ^""^"^ of Rabbits Karls 20 identities seem to be falling Welcome °"^ everywhere! Part four of ^ fi0«5»l^0dem Comics Age Wdmen"': our controversial comic story to Weenie ^f^J^=', ;Comlcs1r)ttiie'90'sareCreddy-Tim , ^StudontS ' R|-2^'Mansfieldwlih^erylhrngyc^ever^^ World Role aojiellyfish F;:^.' -wanted to know about peopJeln^v ^ /' t^'S/i^JSi*.^ J^l playing Games thirty degrees retrograde tights but were afraid to are aeddy too 33 Styte/eH 90210 14 This IS The Shorpi^f i^ ?f |/'V' ^ T' 34 W' is it a Melbourne's, black;dacl'three-plece;" Croc-k? Scott Cooper putting It bluntly puts his case ' ,C^ ^ ^
35 fjoviews A ^ > ft.* 44 Tne Nake ^of. ^^?f^^i ^w/^ s-s* ;'s^ >'A?, ^u0 jf rciilipl is'lte ;opiiJiri^o||iap8S^^ then-spcirtis the >^sx~J|cc4.||i '*4^ •• ^!\x4iJ^^ «-^-^ />;£^,v The wlnwri of Semper*'! iWrt competition were Marcy Nobie, Tom BIfkhotz, Benedict Power, Sarah flahertty and Nick! Turrier. Well done ycu degenerate hippies. .land Student Unionv ;;37|::4JS5;EftM}U;;;: ifv thl%fnafi^2aie>r<>; ;i;»t ^itg^::thi|liifoj^^: (iayvl'^^ ; Seaf:Vi^;ln^£i^^^^^^^^^^ iilactualij^: Want tte job'^iAJter^l;ppork:yOTt^ HELLFIRE FOR THE he Hellfire Club Is fhe brainchild of S&M Tenthusiast Richard Masters, who, after visit ing mainstream S&M clubs In New York and Amsterdam, decided It was time to push Australia's own underground S&M scene into ttie mainstream. The establishment of Hellfire In Sydney and Melbourne about a year ago has certainly succeeded In pushing the scene Into ttie public eye, generating exten sive media debate and the odd picl Now, far be It from me to enter Into ttie mine field of sexual politics by attempting to argue for or against the validity of S&M as a private sexual practice and whether or not it Is a heo///iy'(psychologically) move to drag It Into the public eye, There Is already considerable debate concerning this subject (no doubt this public debate Is Masters' Intention) and, quite frankly even though it is all very Interest ing, I really couldn't be bothered going Into It. Why? Because you want to know what Hellfire was actually like, don't you? Weil. I'll tell you.... |jppi^if5i5«iITfTW*^^^ YOU DIRECT ME TO THE In an effort to be fashionably late I arrived at Ithe Site around 11 o'clock, figuring that the Rave would be In full swing by ttiis time. As I stepped out of the taxi I was glad to see a steady stream of people filing In through ttie front door while the sounds of the techno dance beat filtered out and onto the side walk, About twenty or so exhausted looking revellers were milling around on ttie sidewalk, no doubt catching some fresh air before returning Inside. As I pulled out my ticket and walked over to the front door I was pleasantly surprised not to see representatives of various local religious organisations picketing the Club and condemning It as a sin before God, taking It as a sign that the final days were upon us, and that everybody who went inside was condemned to burn In hell for all eternity. 'Gee, perhaps things really are changing.' I murmured to myself as I handed over my ticket and stepped inside. {Actually Ihey had been there but must have given up and gone home to write more letters to Semper - ed) Rave was well publicised, with the promise of much whipping, spanking and bondage acts to be seen. Quite frankly, I was intrigued by the whole concept, and like the rest of Brisbane was curious to see what an S&M Rave was really like. So, in the interests (or perhaps under the pretences) of the investigative journalism I somewhat ten tatively went to the Site, and to my amazement discovered that -* The first thing I could not help noticing v/as much to the crowd's approval. By using an that Hellfire had attracted a phenomenal assortment of "punishment' tools, including a IS THAT IT? crowd, as I had never seen the Site so packed flail, cane and a v/ooden paddleboard, the red In my life. The dancefioor was absolutely feather v;oman swiftly turned the crowd into a crammed with people energetically dancing congregation of v/hooping, whistling, cheering rue to red-feather's prophecy, there v/as to happy techno dance songs, songs which voyeurs. Tno end of volunteers to indulge in both blended seemlessly onto each other as the v/hipping and being v/hipped and the crowd beat of each new song neatly picked up the After a few more minutes of this. .?he relented of voyeurs never tired in watching. But as I beat of the last (far be It from me to say that and v/hispered something to the young man. v/atched yet another volunteer step out of this suggests anything about the creativity of He nodded his head, and she proceeded to the crov/d to be v/hipped (the majority by techno musicians...). The song that was play untie him as the crowd gare a cheer and the v/ay, of volunteers were male) i asked ing as I walked in sounded something like a around of applause. As the young man myself a question. How many times can one car alarm screaming at full blast, but nobody stepped back into the crowd, another was tak v/atch people being whipped before It really seemed to mind. Behind tiTe dancefioor ing his place on the wooden frame. A young becomes boring and predictable? How long was a large screen, which alternately was woman stepped from the crov^d and said before the novelty v/ears thin? Sure, I had screening scenes from Blue Velvet (the closet something to the red feathier v/omon, v/ho nod found the whippings that I had come looking bit), Hellraiser (the gruesome nasty bit with ded, handed her one of the whips, and after for. but they only left me bored and disinter hooks and chains), and a film with which I was giving her a few v/ords of advice stepped back ested. The opening of "The Attic" at half past unfamillor and basically consisted of three and let her begin beating the young man. I one for much advertised 'Private S&M play' women In tight leather spanking each other pushed my way out of the crowd and walked offered me hope, but only turned out to be ("No doubt one of Lynch's lesser knov/n films" over to the red feather v/oman. more of the same, Feeling something like a I thought). disenchanted Victorian dilettante v/ho v/as "Con 1 help you?' Red feather asked calmly. bored v/ith all that was offered to him, I emp In front of this screen, and set at a slightly Somehow 1 could hear her quite clearly, regard tied my final drink and decided to leave. hilgher level ttxin ttTe dancefioor, was a stage. less of the sounds of the car alarms blaring from People In tight block leather and otho'- appro the next room. Upon recolleclion. I do not regret refusing a priate bondage grab would occasionally whipping. But perhaps that is because I know climb up onto this stage and proceed to "I was v/ondering If all these people were volun that I'll soon have another chance. Before 1 spank each other. Unfortunately It looked teers out of the crowd.' left I took time out to have a couple of v/ords highly staged, and left me feeling somewhat with Richard Masters, and asked him if he disappointed. "Yes, they are. The people on the stage aren't was thinking of opening a regular nightclub they're Hellfire people, but these people' she In Brisbane. "Could this be all the Hellfire has to offer me?" pointed to the young woman, who v-zos smiling I mused to myself as I surveyed the main room gleefully as she slopped the cane across the "Yeah, v/e should be opened up regularly In and dance floor. "A danceporty, movies , young man's bum." - they're voiurteers, They'll a couple of months," he said excitedly. So all and highly staged spa.iking? Surely there must be at it all night too." She paused and then those of you v/ho didn't go (but really be more. Where are the whlppingsl' Feeling asked - "Would you like to be beaten. Is that v/anted to and v/ouldn't admit it) will have o slightly ripped off, but still hopeful of finding a what you're asking?" I threw a quick look over second chance to be Sado-Masochlsts for a good old fashioned flogging, I graobed a my shoulder at the young v/oman v/ith the night. The He.lfire Club open regularly In drink (ttiree bucks for a beer, con you believe cane, and remembered the time I was caned Brisbane. It'll drav/ the crowds, but how long itl) and set off to investigate. in Primary School for fighting (I was. however, v/ili the novelty last? totally innocent and did not deserve the caning because It was Rictiord Monk v/ho threv/ the first punch. Anyway, the little shit thoroughly CamerQH"Spanky " Beles mm. deserved o thrashing), and recalled that i hadn't particularly enjoyed it then. FETISH IS READY...." 'Ah, I'll get back to you, okay?' Red feather trolling into the side room that houses the nodded as I said this, Spool tables and the narrow staircase that and then walked over leads up to "The Atflc", I discovered a tightly to the wooden frame packed group of about sixty or so people fac as she began to tie up ing the wall. Since they were standing too a new volunteer. As I close together I couldn't see what they were sat dov/n I recognised looking at, but they would occasionally whis the nev/ volunteer as a tle and cheer quite loudly. Whatever it was, friend of mine (v/ho they were absolutely loving it. Needless to say, shall remain nameless). I was intrigued, and with murmured apologies so I decided to hang to those I trod upon, pushed my way to the around and ask him just front of the crowd. how being whipped feels like. Set before the crowd was a wooden frame 'How was It?' I asked that stood up like a tadder. A young man with him after he returned to his shirt off and the back of his Jeans pulled the crowd. down exposing his bum was standing up "It fucken' well HURT!" against this frame with his back to us. His was his reply. hOfTds were securely tied to the top half of the "Would you try it frame while his ankles were tied to the bot again?" tom. A woman In a flowing red dress that was "No!" And then he decorated vAth many feathers and wearing a went off to get a well red face mask was virhlpplng this young man. earned beer. Calling Oeeupanl'S ol JntoplancJapy CraM We take a caring and sharing look at ttiis month's cries for help to the editors. backwoter mother-fucker, not even more affluent parts of Brisbane. zine the goddamn goddamn V/ho ?m\.KDl^Z LOST mode your first billion in box-office They were last sighted heoding magazine' - that's who doctor! receipts! You'll never make it in o towards Kenmore v/ith their pea To those of you who have never world of plastic surgery, blood- shooters and their "Fidel forever" t- Witch doctor, that's who, the Tardis ventured out of the western sub money, and first-rate silicon shirts (I think Fidel is one of the has nothing to do with it. Goddamn urbs, implants? Will you look good year characters in A Country Practice). goddamn, who knows how to give 0 boost to boring old haz-beans after year for those pesky It was with horror thct I read Ms paparazzi? Who's wearing who? Yes, Wynnum is well and truly on (packed with vitamin A, fibre, pro Kiley Gaffney's article about my overseas goddamn? Shame. Public the road to moral purity. With the tein and pulpy-pop!) Haz-beans delighlful home town of Wynnum. like Elizabeth Hayes and that Image. Elizabeth Taylor is dead. Admittedly we Wynnum residents government's recent announcement that it would perform 9000 frontal 'Growing Pains' girl who lost so have had our trials and tribulations much weight, it must have been a Stories for boys: Who Magazine, over the years. We've had our fair lobotomies iri the oreo by the year 1995, I am becoming increasingly real pain for Elizabeth to grow up because glitz is good and everyone share of rifle-wielding maniocs, in the sticks! She knew John must yearn for the plastic goddomn inebriated degenerates and hous optimistic. Our beautiful suburb has much to offer. PLEASE PLEASE Singleton a bit loo well, single taste golden ones in the sky. ing commission boons. But times of right-wing nausea strikes me have changed. PLEASE consider moving back to Wynnum, Ms Gaffney. I can guar- dead i don't know about you.... -1 like Who Magazine! ontee you that you won't find a bet Who knows exactly whot Steve I om proud to inform you that Martin looks like in sunglasses? Carl Rickard Wynnum has put its seedy past ter doss of neanderthal this side of The Gap. 'Who' that's who, better not men behind it. In fact Wynnum has now tion the noise owls make who who ME TOO! become a haven for clean, decent who! Read this magazine back Yours sincerely, living folk, Local church groups wards and it's just so Ohw, does Afnanda "prolelanat and proud of STjTTTY SI^TT SI5EETS have forced bevons ond bikies into that mean anything? Who takes permanent exile (together with ii" Parker black and white photos 'cause I've had enough. I'm fucking angry most of fhe Gaffney family). The they're right out of colour film? and I'm here to say that this will not homicidal killers who once stalked Who smells like commerdal TV, the be tolerated. Why do the fhe district ore now in therapy and real state of our hearts? And which Conservatives think that its OK to hove vowed fo become Mormons teen spirit sold itself to me just like Who knows people goddamn? broadcast homophobia on this when their community services Faith No More? Commercial TV - People people people people compus. I've stood giving out how stints end. Michael Veitch sold out - commer people not 'People' the magazine, fo vote cords for Focus, I've read cial TV because who are you? Not but the magazine that knows the propaganda for oil the different Our crime rate has been drasti goddamn anyone importont god people goddamn goddamn. The sides, I've heard what's been soid cally reduced since the local MP damn, that's for sure. Who? What real people, the ones on the screen, in the lecture bashes by the differ described to juvenile delinquents in did you say your name was? Who? on the box, in the Cinema god ent groups. the oroo the concept of "displace Sorry, never heard of you buddy, ment" and its relevance to the class damn those ones! better try someone else! see you As a 41 year old poofter who has struggle. Now Wynnum's delin later! You'll never be anyone good lived in the real world for a lone quents ore channelling their ener Who knows how to tell us exactly enough to get into this red hot time now, I am absolutely gies into more laudable pursuits. who the real important people on throbber of a magazine, who are astounded and totolly fucked off b'-' Rather thon bashing their own the Planet on the Hollywood you? the outright homophobia that is neighbours to a pulp, they have Boulevorde on the Planet are right token to bashing people in the now? You know who - the mago- allowed on this campus. It is a dis You're some irrelevant Brisbane grace and would not be allowed in so mony workplaces in our country. tion materiel. This is my second come out, fake a stand and fight institute "The University of I say this with pride because I have year at this University and it seems against your vileness. But there are Queensland". As a few of you fought in my workplaces to put an that bigotry and hatemongering more and more of us (only today I know, I ran with Deceit for the end to this vile shit. I have fought ore accepted as normal for elec had someone come out to me and Semper election (for oil you that and won the support of unions and tions. Well let me tell you Tory fuck- they had already voted ogainst you voted for Lome and I - thank you managers in my working life and 1 wits, that hatemongering" and big because of your bigotry). I am told very, very much) as did my good have ensured that this pestilence is otry do not just go out into the that the shitsheet put out by the friends in Trubble. Unfortunately, consigned lo the scrap heap where empty air and disoppeor. They Tories purporting that both Vision we both lost. Even more unfortu it belongs. Yet here at the place of incarnate in rape and bashing and and Focus had o specific "gay nately, Timelords won. Now, I don't so called light, liberty and learning, murder. This year I have known a rights" agendo won votes for the hove a personal grudge against it seems to be an accepted woy of 19 year old guy become veg- anti-conservatives because people these boys BUT I think with their life. etabilised because of poofter bash thought that it was a good thing to track record, ie a half on article ing. He hod only just come out and support us. I only hope that enough published in September's issue, It is especially ironic when the New to people were taken in by yojr lies to they ere not really quolified to South Wales liberal Party is against you! know anything about publishing ously considering entering something that people like. (I must in next years Lesbian lol much more to say. I am also apologist profusely to Stephen Mardi Gras - a fl angry. I do intend to Dann here for commenting on his include John e Human Rights stage of sexuol development and Fahey, the intend to utilise implying that his parents were local Tories ha the gay and les- related during election week.) the real worli n this town to about the shit. My goal I suppose what I am trying to say is port the lections you that, voting is essential and the only a life! If ou will be fuckers that seemed to vote were up your ^your hote- bloody right-wing baby eating queer p ligns. We fuckstains. Don't you get it - next WILL ito circum- year you will get a Semper filled peopi a crosh- with photographs of the editors stand bia and running around with bloody long beings I't like it, scarves on, being really bloody fight agl icceptable annoying pre-pubescents and you'll selves. ( intend to have no-one to blame but your selves. Shame on you shjdents! I It is even' didn't necessarily want you to vote sider that for Deceit, but you could hove ore actual voted for any of the bloody 'nor dykes but the mal' (and 1 don't use this world nism and call lightly) teams and still got intelligi Yet you sick hah f ble articles. Now you are doomed them to oppose HAEL. I TOO AM to read crop. OF SOME OF that's something AT CRAWL OUT AT more poofters would Yours incredibly sincerely, IMES AND THINK THAT and then you complain Kiley Gaffney xxx THING CRAP THEY REPRE- all left wing. Well hey, if some3fl THE MAJORITY OF THE STU kicking you in the head wouldn'] P.S. Thank you once again Koty, DENT BODY. STILL, AS THE ELEC you stand with people who support but"nrwPipiiPPii^WV§ been Andrew and Nick for your encour TION RESULTS SHOW - GIVE you? And as someone who has organising for a while now. This is agement and a fucking greet THEM ENOUGH ROPE... been physically kicked in the head not longer Uncle Job's foscist state • Semper. May tiie force be with you by male homophobic shits I don't we will not cop your hate any BmRJR(2 KhL r^ER and hopefully we will seen another use that metophor lightly. longer. If you hove a problem with BR3D(2ES greet editorship once again. that-TOO FUCKING BAD! The Union does have policjes Friends, students, campusites lend KYLIE'S NEW BOOK,"SO, WHY against homophobic material yet it I hold you all responsible for every me your ears, DON'T YOU WANT TO HAVE A seems that it does not apply in elec queer that gets harassed and CONVERSATION ABOUT ALL tion time. Similarly with the policies • bashed, for every women that gets I would like to say in a most gratu ABOUT ME?" IS AVAILABLE NOW on sexisrn. Hey, why not bring out harassed and roped, if you whip itous manner how thankful i cm to FROM SEMPER PRESS. BUT SERI the whole hog ond allow racist and up hotred and bigotry then the the editors of this yearns Se.Tiper for OUSLY, IT'S KYLIE WHO other bigoted campaigning! Maybe blood is on your hands. But we will allowing me to wollow in my own DESERVES THE THANKS FOR SUB- it's obout time that the Union not take it anymore. I have been self-importance bv sharing my MiniNG SUCH GREAT ARTICLES enforced its policies on sexism, proud to see queer women and somewhat twisted lire and theories (REASONABLY PROMPTLY) EVERY racism and homophobia on elec- men, some of whom have only just with the students of this magnificent ISSUE. TA KYLES. r £KirJKe5 4 UOQTU! AUi4o^it^G f^^RH)"' Erethron begat Zebedlah, ivho begat FUael who begat Johannes, who became known as 'Dudley.' Johannes spent Ajiercost (n the desert, J^d U came to pass that on this day the second faoiuf was emptied. And then there was Roger, htmging there. Hanging... oo ELECTIONS THE WINNERS Disclaimer Before I tell you aboul the UQ Union not to have ttieir name leaked POSITION NAME TEAM Election I want you to know that I'm before ttie close of nomina PRESIDENT WATT, Murray FOCUS writing this report not only as a left tions - largely because ttiey SECRETARY MCALLISTER, Jennifer FOCUS wing, pro-union student, but also as hadn't made a decision them TREASURER THORPE, Mary FOCUS the current President of the Union • a selves. However, ttie wtiole CLUBS & SOCS VP TERRY, Michelle FOCUS member of the executive that was philosoptiy ot keeping ttie AGIVITIESVP OTTO, Narween fOCUS continually defamed, insulted and team name a secret until close GENERAL VP SHANKEY, David FOCUS harassed throughout the election of nominations went out ttie EDUCATION VP LYNCH, Sean FOCUS campaign. So I may be a little biased. window wtien "BEST of 93" COLLEGES VP COWELL, Lisa SPEaRUM ctianged ttieir name to FO ^ My first experience of ttie student elec- WOMEN'S EQUAL OPPORTUNnY VP RIDE, Carolyn FOCUS CUS = FEE INCREASE after I tions was in 1990.1 remember being on POSTGRADUATE VP MUSGRAVE, Richard IND ttie dead-line. A loop-hole that I ttie bus from Indooroopilly Shopping PART TIMERS VP BONGERS, Jason FOCUS will no doubt be fixed up be DUVAL, Craig Town and looking al all the pictures in TURBOT ST AREA VP IND fore next year. FORREST, Michael "^ ttie Election Semper and seeing a guyi HOSPITALS AREA VP SPECRUM ViCARY, Peter named Ian who was a friend of minel^There were other teams run- EXTERNALS VP . VISION SISKIND, Dan (kind ol) whom I knew when 1 was going^ ning in the election. ISC (Inter- NAT'L STUDEfviT AFFAIRS OFFICER FOCUS to church. About tha last time I'd seen^ national Socialist Club} ran for EDITORS OF THE UNION BOLTON, David ) him was on a church camp and he'dl^a few positions to show the NEWSPAPER DANN, Stephen } TIMELORDS gone through everyone we knew and^,^ rest of the teams how a proper WARD, Cameron} categorised Ihem thus "... you known^ election campaign should be AG/SCIENCE FORESTRY REP OLLEY,Mark IND she's a swampie, he's a mod, he's a jock^ run and we thank them fortheir ARCHITECTURE & PLANNING REP AITCHISON, Matthew FOCUS ...". When t asked him what I was he •^contribution. Then there was ARTS FULL TIME REPS CONOPUA, Rebecca FOCUS said. 'You Sandy, you're a square." In^KLOP. I haven't been bothered BENNEH, Tanya FOCUS the end I got back at him by convincing^ to find out what exactly was RICHARDSON, Joanna FOCUS him ail the music he listened to was "OF^ going on here but 1 think they FORREST, Walter SPECTRUM THE DEVIL" and he ended up burning a|| annoyed fhe hell out of the WENTWORTH, Sarali VISION quite valuable record collection. But I ^election staff with all the write- ARTS PART TIME REPS JERRED, Paul FOCUS voted for my groovy friend Ian and his^on candidates that you all did GRAHAM, Katie FOCUS team purely and simply because I knew - but it doesn't matter as long AMES, Katherine VISION him. as you all had fun. COAWiERCE/ECONOMICS REPS PAYNTER, Gerard SPEQRUM CROOKE, MaHhew FOCUS If you know and respect someone then Semper came up with a few BOHLSCHEID, Emma SPEQRUM chances are you'll vote for them in the good names this year such as DENTISTRY REP DUGAN, David IND lelections. However, an interesting thing TRUBBLE, DECEIT, Against EDUCATION REP SCANNED, Susan VISION that happens around election time is Post Modernism and For Post ENGINEERING REPS GILBERT, Cfirisfopher SPEaRUM people you vaguely know start coming Modernism and my favourite HANNIGAN,Todd SPECTRUM up to you like you're their best friend and MUMSAtDWECOULD. All LWV'REP DUPUY, Paulelte FOCUS asking "How are you going and by the were reasonably interesting MEDICINE REPS WHITEL4W, Sarah FOCUS way are you voting this week?" Candi names and some even had FREDERIKSEN, Steven BEST OF'93 dates want to ingratiate themselves ontol interesting campaigns to go PHARMACY/THERAPIES REPS MORTON, Ann-Louise SPECTRUM the student masses in what ever way along with them. However, for PRITCHARD, Catherine SPECTRUM possible. So if they don'l know you per whatever reason the students MUSIC REP BROWN, Vivienne FOCUS sonally, they'll give you leaflets, "bash" R8 decided on the TIMELORDS. SCIENCE REPS FALLU, Mark FOCUS your lectures, chat with you while you're Personally I thought the name JENKINS, Carlyle SPECTRUM having lunch and do everything else in was enough to lose them the WICKHAM, Brent SPEaRUM their power to get your vote. This is called election. Not slagging Dr Who CLEGG, Christine FOCUS campaigning. or anything. Yes everyone SOCIAL WORK REP STAPLETON, Adam FOCUS likes the show. Yes it would be The team with the best campaign usu VETERINARY SCIENCE REP BUHERWORTH, Edward SPECTRUM great if the Tardis were real. ally wins. This year FOCUS took the EXTERNAL REP WICKHAM, Mellissah SPECTRUM Yes, yes, yes - but there js honours gaining 1700 primary voles to COLLEGES REP MACQUEEN, Peggy SPECTRUM something so intrinsically in SPECTRUMS 1500 AND VISIONS 500. OVERSEAS STUDENTS REP WONG, Ka Ming SPEaRUM sipid about ripping off Dr Who FOCUS have 10 ot the 15 votes on the POSTGRADUATE RJLLTIME REPS FISCHER, Jane VISION like these kids did. It's just so executive and nearly half of council. WRIGHT, Andrew FOCUS grade nine. No, but really. I'm VIZZARD, Michelle FOCUS So, lets have a quick look at the Univer sure Semper will be great next OOESTENBROEK, Anthony SPEaRUM sity of Queensland election '93 style. I'l Iyear . POSTGRADUATE PART TIME REPS JENNER, Steve IND start with the team names. In the end it seemed like HAMWOOD, Julie VISION I One of the most often asked questions TIMELORDS simply out cam BENZIE, Timothy FOCUS I this year was WHAT THE HELL IS THE paigned the other contenders. SISKIND, Marlene FOCUS DEAL WITH THE OPTICALTHEtJlE IN Their win was convincing HOLLEY, Anthony SPECTRUM THE TEAM NAMES. I MEAN - SERI enough to give them that much STAFF REPS ON COUNCIL WRIGHT, Simon OUSLY - VISION. FOCUS AND SPEC credit. However being fully STICKLEY,Abn TRUM! A bit like a Sesame Street skit, endorsed by SPECTRUM ob SERVICES & FINANCE COMMITTEE SHANKEY, David FOCUS really. viously helped them along. - STUDENT REPS GLYNN, Joanna SPEaRUM WENTWORTH, Sarah VISION The story with team names is that you I The election on a whole was SERVICES & FINANCE COMMIHEE COGILL, Diana try and keep them a secret until after on a smaller scale then previ - STAFF REPS PEREIRA, Dawn nominations close so people can't run ous years. All the t6a^^s didn't ACADEMIC BOARD • U/G REPS McALUSTER, Jennifer FOCUS "joke teams" like SPECTRUM = LIBER-1 come out in force until Cam LYNCH, Sean FOCUS y ALS. VISION = ALP, FOCUS = FEE IN- paign Week. While most stu MCDONALD, James ^ CREASE and have these appear on the I dents were pleased with not SPECTRUM ACADEMIC BOARD - P/G REPS FISCHER, Jane I election materia!. This is no easy task being hassled as much as in VISION HAMWOOD, Julie when around 60 people are involved in previous years, some ot us VISION ! each team. FOCUS were the only ones were wondering if anyone would be bothered to vote. In the end give half price bus fares to students, they Now on to FOCUS. At first FOCUS^ inadvertently hitting some classes about the voter turnout was not that bad at were claiming victory because the City seemed fairly keen to ignore the iee-\r\-W,5 times in the two weeks. I think Ihey about 4200 votes cast. Down on last Council "v/ill have to listen to us now". crease issue and not a little worriedly also ran the risk ol seeming too slick and year, but better than most. This kind of fluffy campaigning was about being labled the same as this organised - bul apparently nol. The first anyone saw of SPECTRUM topped by their fluffy propaganda. Vi [years executive. They seemed to be try-'' was their petition to call a referendum sion promises to change the world, bitu ing to do a balancing act between wanl-^'" '^^ ^"^ '^'^ ^^"^^ '^ '"• ^'"^"^^ '"^- on the question of the tee increase. This men the carparks, and keep ABBA in the I ling to have enough left credibility andlo^'y^"^ 'bought it would be a lot closer was supported by propaganda stacked Schonell and to do ail of this without al |get the left vote, yet not wanting to ap-J^Jl^'" '^ ^^^- " ^^^ ^ '^°"''"'='"9 ^'"' "°' fee increase. Meanwhile they let us all y inly for FOCUS bul for fhe left as well with lies to the extent that the "Electoral pear too left wing. In the end they finshedVTu— „ .u ,• .•• • .u . Tribunal" ruled that the wording of the know that Kimberley Kitching was the uDp sittinsitiingo oonn ththee fencfencee -- soun..unHd familiaf.miii.r/Jhir s IS actually the first time in ages that Ithe left have been returned to the Un petition question itself was so value "biggest funster" and the "dancing Murray? This is often the problem with ion, and heralds a new stage in UQ stu- laden and had so many (mis)leading queen" on campus. This was essentially left wing teams. They are usually con I dent politics. statements that it needed to be stripped about all we got from VISION this year. vinced that most students are either apa back to the basic question. The referen Oh yeah, except tor publishing a photo thetic or right-wing. FOCUS came .There were a couple of remarkable dum was eventually accepted. Spectrum with Kimberley at a demonstration. I still through, though. They took a stand on jlhings in the campaign that 1 should continued to campaign on this issue and [haven't figured that one out. the fee-increase issue and were the only mention. MUMSAIDWECOULD's dog claims of this year's Union being ineffi was speaking with a VISION personk team to attempt to address the issues of 'and campaign was possible the funni cient at best and corrupi al worst. and another student in election week. l| the campaign in a realistic and honest est I've ever seen - if only they had more exposure; the amount of lies, lies and I was surprised at the similarities be said that it was surprising how few can manner. I think that students actually ap more lies this year was second to none; tween this year's and previous year's didates had a clue at all about how thei preciated this and essentially that's one the Bomb scare; Kiley Gaffney and Nigel Right-Wing campaigns. Especially as tar Union worked. The VISION person saidi of the main reasons they won. Pearn "out-skitting" each other; the righ as the posters and lecture bashing styles Well maybe that's a good thing, maybel It also seemed to me that they spent hall wing making Grant Muller campaign] went. I think ils a good rule that if people we'll be able to get more than you didi theirtime and energy countering the attacks manager?!?!?; the amount of campaign! aren't listening to you in a lecture - you done."As you can imagine I thought ihatl from SPECTRUM and VISION. Again there ideas ripped off (Irom all sides) from last start yelling at Ihem. I know I'd respond was an incredibly valid comment. Itl is a fine line as to how much you respond year's SEA campaign; and thoi well to this one, guys. Spectrum's post seems to me that this is the way they to shit Irom other teams and how much you TIMELORDS winning (I still don'l get it). ers were shockers but they did pick up came across to students. "Hi guys. We Ikeep plugging away promoting yourself. to an extent wilh the layout of their propa don't really know what we're talking However, il they were a bit excessive in the We'll all take our fond memories of the ganda - although they completely ripped about, we're not going to take a position shit sheet side of things, they made up for Elections '93 with us but when it's all said off a lot of the layout for their broadsheet on anything or to come up with any real it in positive lecture bashing and talking to and done. I don't know anyone who isn't from last year's campaign. policies, but if you elect us we'll do a bet- people one on one. ^_ glad it's over. iter job than this year did or any other can By the week before campaign week, VI didates could promise". The funny thing FOCUS' main strength was in the cali So until next year Voters - adeiu, and remember for Semper '94 - VOTE 1 SION had started the tried and (and not is that there were a few people in VISION bre ot people on the team and their dedi- EKKY FOR SEMPER ... WE LOVE! so true) bus discount petition. Having that I think would have done a good job, calion, hard work and ability. Again, they YOU. YOU'RE OUR BEST FRIEND apparently got over 4000 students to PI hopefully they'll stick around next ye ar and simply out-campaigned the other teams. 4 sign a petition demanding Jim Soorley get involved with the Union. To some extent they took it a bit too far, Well we Couldn't Resist Telling You If Youi^ You'll Get Have At HUNwrTaring V JACK'S MsismcEimEmi TV were returned to society matrons, de- That's easy. You clone him several limes A Bit Of Comics rhocracy was saved at every turn. and bring him back to life. Yet another History revolution in the revolutionary world of At the turn of this century, comics as we comic book fiction. But how revolution Marvel and The Silver knowthem today didn't exist. To be more ary is it really? Whal is a postmodern specific, comic books didn't exist. As Age comic or a modernist comic for that mat Scott McCloud points out in Undersfarjd- Soon of course, this brave new world be ter? Are these terms even relevant when ing Comics (an excellent read if you can gan lo show signs of age. The comics discussing a medium of expression find a copy), sequential art has existed market, largely dominated by DC Com largely dealing with idiotic themes forthousands of years, but the newsprint ics looked ripefo r some new blood. printed on shitty paper? Well, yes, I booklet with the speech balloons is a It appeared in the form of Marvel Com think (hey are. comparatively recent invention. ics under the dedicated direction of the The newspapers were running comic doubtless daddy of the day, stupefyingly flQDERNIST strips just as they do today and eventu stagey Stan Lee! The golden age was ally someone got the idea of collecting a over and the Manuel Age was here! Ex COMICS run of strips into a book. In the thirties, clamation marks dotted every caption the first comics which weren't just col box! Excuse me for a moment, lections of strips appeared and the comic The Man/el approach was to look at new this may get a little heavy, book was born. needs of the market that DC wasn't pro but bear with me. Detective stories, horror tales and war viding. So we got teen angsl from Peter Modernism and stories abounded and then one day two Parker, the amazing Spiderman. Postmodernism aren't guys from Ohio called Joe Siegel and psychedelia from Dr Strange, master of really art movements in Jerry Schuster came up with a guy in the mystic arts and straight oul commie- the same sense that. blue underwear who changed all of that. bashing from Iron Man. Millionaire indus say Surrealism or Neo trialist Tony Stark invented the costumed Geo or Expressionism The Last Son Of that made him into his high tech alter ego !^re. For one thing they Iron Man and then proceeded to save Doth refer to character- Krypton the free world from such menaces as sties of movements; In a sense, comics were a modernist The Barbarian and The Mandarin who, I they seek to group medium from the start. II was a very suppose were trying to save the Soviet movements based on modern form: fast, immediate, popular. worid from the likes of Iron Man; ideological similarities. No-one realised that at the lime because Terrified by the competition. DC duly For anotherthey refer comics weren't taken seriously until very spent the late sixties and early seven to movements in all recently ties revamping its golden age heroes into creative fields, art, ar Siegel and Schuster's Superman char new costumes and often whole new chitecture, literature, acter however was the first hero of the identities, Green Arrow grew a beard and photography, sculp modernist age. He appeared first in Ac started wearing more leather. Batman ture, art criticism and, tion Comics in 1938 and rapidly rose to got a thinner head and started acting inevitably comics. heights undreamed of. He was a new much less cheery. Both lost their unfash The modernisms be god with an earthly focus. He sen/ed ionable (and slightly suspect) boy com gan al different times humanity, fighting proper^/ crime wher panions by packing them off lo college. in different fields, but ever it was found, returning the hard-won Green Lantern got squeezed into a skin generally around the wealth of millionaires to its rightful own tight body suit and lost his cape. beginning of this cen ers. What a guy! Social causes became the order of the tury. Abstract art was One year later in Detective Comics, day; as the seventies drew on Super beginning to take off: Bruce Wayne, neurotic millionaire play man began saving hapless teens from Surrealism, Dada, boy pulled on his leather mask and evil genii bent on subverting their pro Futurism, Cubism longjohns and became Batman for the test marches. Batman started working were outraging sensi- first time. Soon they were '"oined by Cap- against gangs and murderers instead of ^bilities everywhere. fain Marvel, Wor\der Woman, Johnny bank robbers. Green Arrow gave away The new architecture Thunder, Green Lantern, Green Arrow, his fortune and became a vagrant. At one was redefining our rela Black Canary, Kid Eternity and scores point he had a lenghthy leamup with tionship to space. Le of others. Green Lantern and during their travels Corbusier, Frank Lloyd This was the Golden Age of comics. A discovered Speedy (the ex-boy compan Wright, the Bauhaus school whole new pantheon of gods sprung ion) a heroin(e) addict. created the skyscraper, the from the minds of fevered young men to Comics were suddenly no longer cheery Guggenheim Museum: new build empty the pockets of fevered young escapism. Grim messages abounded. ings made from new materials in men. Criminals, juvenile delinquents, Captain America once stalwart of the es- new shapes. In literature James mad scientists, aliens from space all fell Joyce, Samuel Beckett, Katherine before the might of the Justice Society So wurde Bruce „BATMAi\' Mansfield and Virginia Woolf were rede of America. Endless banks were pro- • denn er ist ja Amerlka- fining what "writing", "narrative' and ner, und Flederinaus heilJt lecled. Da! Ein Huschen... Flettern "novel" meant. Exciting days... modern countless Eine Fledermaus hat sicti days. jewels ins Zimmer verirrt! •All of these developments are 'called modernist because they're characterised by a re- !jection of tradition, an enthusiasm for the new and a commitment to . fundamental changes in how art is created. Modernism is about revo lution. For most of this century, various modernisms have swept the arts, each one reacting against the failures of those before. They bloom, flower, 'I wilt and die only to be replaced by a new movement bringing new hope for a brighter modern future^ It's very fifties isn't it? Very sparkly and lamtnex-topped. " Bruce Woyno decides to USB the symlwl of a bal lo light crime in ihlsGerman ro-lellirig of' Batman's origin. The first caption in the second panel Iransbles as (roughly) - "So Bruce became Botman.'because he's on Amorlcon. and "Bat," in Enaiish. is 'Ball" L w "ws m[j(§(^ tablishment. was forced to start question "normal" is the heart of postmodernism. dead or finished and unalterable. That ing whether he had been fighting for the However she also points out this Is History is Just a was the way things were. Work like good guys after all during a lot ol street merely her formulation and goes on to Campbell's Deadtace remind us (hat pacing. Dark days... discuss the slightly different interpreta Good Yarn both are just good yarns which with a tion of tens ol other theorists. This enor This is close to what Linda calls good storyteller can not only come alive The Underground mous variety of opinions is part of the "historiographic meta-fiction" which is a but change. reason why in this month's Comics Jour briljiartt'term, but this is Semper. I just re-read Earth, Water, Air, Fire the During all of this, DC had bought up most Jhls^jslKeJdea that really history is just of the smaller presses still producing nal J S Russell dubs Postmodernism other day when Bacchus meets Joe 'Ihe ultimate, empty buzzword". ./;;?f ^"'^'^er story. Someone told the story superhero comics. Between them DC Theseus and Ihe Eyeball Kid (who is best However, for the most part, we caniiF''^"^ '^ caughton and now almost every- and Man/el had the hero market sewn read rather than explained) and be agree that each other's definitiDnsrrfei WHAl'S Well, that's it really. Hopefully I've helped you understand mysterious world of postmodernism a little belter. Don't for- gel that that was all my personal take on postmodernism, if you expect to hold your own in an English Department wine and cheese, you really should do some more reading and Hutcheon is a good place lo start. I've also tried to explain what I think comics are doing these days. It's never been enough for comics to deal with mature themes, novels have been do ing that since the 1700s. Comics need to be intriguing and technically inter esling as well and they have become that. As J S Russell says in his re view of Adult Comics: an Introduc tion in this month's Comics Jour nal, comics figure centrally in the debate aboul the defini tion and relationship be tween "high" and "low" culture and the struggle between creativity and com Miroclomon roises the dead in Nsil modity, they can't be ignored. Goiman's vorsion of Alan AAoore's version Above all I hope I've made you of o very British superhero. a little curious. Some of the From Eclipse's Mirackmon #22, writers and artists I've dis oasting a wildly energetic stage Bshow and a trio of hummable hits,T(h]@ SDiiairip) could well be the best pub band in Australia. As they perch on the edge of hugeness with the release of their radio friendly debut album This Is The Sharp the big questions are: What's the secret of their success? and how did they get away with one of the most blatant songs about oral sex ever writ ten ("Scratch My Back")? !MlsQF©(U!« Sa05sIbGiit;'>f takes up the tale and tries out his latest routine to a captive audience of three. he Sharp are a Melbourne band formed in 1991 who are making it Tquite big at the moment. Heck, they've been featured on Paradise Beach. They are noted for their black- clad image and their distinctive sound (and distinctivo double-bass.) This hum ble Semper writer got reasonably drunk at their Brisbane album launch (with a noto rious local TV show host) at the Gig and interviewed the boys in black the day after, picking up some interesting quotes and some quotable autographs. MARCUS: How dose have you stayed to your musical roots? I mean, have you still gol their phone numbers? (laughter) CHARLIE (guitar): Who wants to go first? ALLAN (bass): Musical roots? That was 3 IntrA wasn'r ll? J MARCUS: II was a serious question, with a bit of innuendo. ALLAN: You'd have lo think of what our musical roots are, which is difficult. CHARLIE: 1 think you collect a lot of ideas as you go along when you start writing songs, and it lakes a lot of time, a lol of practice. To do that you've got to hold on to the reasons you wanted to do it in the first place. To keep writing songs you have to maintain that^. I thin3k peopl e lose that after a long time, people like.... MARCUS: Roger Waters.. CHARLIE: ..Paul McCartney, who get lo the stage where they've forgotten why Ihey love writing songs and playing music. ALLAN: I feet sorry for people who lend to become a parcxJy of their for mer selves. MARCUS: Roger Waters again. ALLAN; Yeah, which is what tends to happen in the Rock Industry. PJET(dnjms): Bands when they get really successful, they start losing sight of why they did it in the first place. They want to be successful, so Ihey write songs for that reason. CHARUE: We'll do a Buddy Holly trick, ALLAN: I think I loved music because MARCUS: I think he lives in Geebung. Him and Elvis. my Dad loved it. He had a record col- CHARLIE: Naaah, Elvis has definitely kari CHARLIE: You can only have that if bul still a-piece and still raw. you've gol somelhing lo say, you know, MARCUS: A lot of shjff they play on the radio these days is quite boring, it all you're at school and you're learning like sounds so much the same, doesn't il? everybody else but you have something more to say. I always fell like that at CHARLIE: Yeah, it does. So by having one guitar and drums and bass and all of us school, so I tried pretty hard at sport and singing togettier on the vocal lines, thaf s all you're basically hearing. There's a lot of also music. empty spots if you like, there's no backup on the solos, only bass and dmms. TTiat gives il a sound of its own. PIET: Ifs a way of standing out from the crowd. ALLAN: We're hoping ttie restrictions and limitations we've imposed upon ourselves are going to keep forcing us to think laterally aboul how to appproach the music, how CHARLIE: Yeah, I don'l think il was to write songs and how to record. Thaf s the thing we relied on at the start, basically completely that, but that was part of it, 1 forced on us by poverty. ^ guess. CHARUE: I suppose rock and roll has gone lor a sort ol mass production thing. ALLAN: ll kind of gives you an identity I think, because music's so functional, so much a part of everyday life, so if PIET: With songwriting and stuff we've all got big ears and big eyes for cliches. When you're good at it as a kid then you feel one appears in one of our songs we jump on it straight away. When something someone like you've got a place. else would do shows up, step on it. PIET: And it's something you always CHARUE: Deep inteiviewthis one. isn't'if? have as well. Even If you don't have any ALLAN: Our aim in recording is to capture spontanaeity, feel and excitement rather friends al least you've always got your 'Jian go for pristine sound. So we gel something that feels like il's live. We try to get good sound, but thaf s not priority one. bloody ristaiment! MARCUS: Have you ever contemplated writing a satirical song about Australian life, sort ALLAN: Yeah! of like the Kinks? CHARUE: Oh yeah, we love ttie Kinks. CHARLIE: That was a great question! ALLAN: We've got a song on one of our singles about where we lived in Collingwood. MARCUS: John Entwistle from The Who was on TV the other nlghl. He's getting PIET: Wo just sat around a table and wrote a song about Collingwood. on a bit, and he's been with the same ALLAN: Do you want to hear it? I'll see if I can get a copy. band for about 30 years. Will you be CHARLIE: This isn't a really serious song, though. We were giggling all the way doing the same act when you're aboul through when we were writing it, Uiinking of really stupid lines. But the bottom line is 700 years old? :hat it was really serious. It was heartiell, but basically it's a stupid song. CHARLIE: No. 1 don'l want to be a PIET: We were kind of laughing at how it was. Rolling Stone. Those guys are fantastic and I respect them in some ways for (Allen comes back witii a copy of "CoHingwood." an evocative song witti the Sharp's hanging in there Il's very hard to slay distinctive vocal sound.) together, most groups break up, ifs one CHARLIE: That was ttie B-side of "Scratch My Back." of the biggest problems with bands, bul I think (The Stones) think they're still 25. MARCUS: Oh. that was tiie one witii tiie allegedly mde lyric... PIET: I think 8 lo 10 years is a good PIET: Allegedly...deliberately. lifespan. ALLAN: ll wasn't as ilwe were swearing or anyttiing. CHARLIE: I think the band should CHARUE: And nobody said anything before ttiat. decide when they break up, instead of the MARCUS: We're going to have to wind this up soon as you're going to have public deciding, lunch soon. MARCUS: Gel out while you're on top? PIET: Yeah, a power lunch. CHARLIE: Yeah, we should go missing MARCUS: Before I go, can I have your autographs? [Don'f blow it Marcus, it's over the Bermuda Triangle and retire to nearly over!-ed\ some island! CHARUE: Sure. ALLAN: Iceland! ALLAN: Do you want a poster or something? What was yournamc again? (Laughter) MARCUS: Marcus. MARCUS: Geebung. PIET: Aurelius! '(More laughs) CHARLIE: I enjoyed that inten/iew. Okay, this is what happened.[ Sunday of women and their contraceptive liability rate. If I choose a barrier method, night I had a wonderful bonk with my choices, was basing her judgement such as cap, diaphragm, condom, or partner, and then on Monday morning I purely on her own moral position. I had lUD, the failure rate is increased. Caps woke up, looked at my Brevinor packet gone inlo her office fully aware of my and diaphragms have to be medically and realised, with a good deal of swear choices • I knew the unp'easanl effects filled, so your control factor basically er ing. that I had forgotten my pill on Sun- of the MA Pill, I knew it was available. I goes out the window, plus spermicide .S day morning. Shit. had experienced the possibility of un tastes so god-awlul that it rules out oral planned pregnancy before and faced the sex. so my ability to choose what kind of it I've been on the pill for aboul six months consequences. What if I had been an sex I want is undennined. Plus, caps ^ now, and I've forgotten pills before, but uninformed woman, a non-English and diaphragms don't protect against Is have always been able to follow-up by speaking woman, a younger, less confi disease. Condoms would have to be the C remembering to use condoms. This lime dent woman? Would she have given me best option -they protect against VD and y was a brt close for comfort though, so I all the options available? Would she AIDs, you avoid mess, and the possibil Q made a doctor's appointment, planning even have suggested the MA Pill at all? ity of thrush and urinary tract infection is ^ to gel the Morning After Pill, For those What if I was pregnant? Would she have reduced. But they do break - most of us » of you vA\o don't already know, the Mom- even suggested an abortion? Or would have had some post-breakage panic y ing After Pill is two tablets of a fairly high- she, perhaps, have reported me lo the before - and they do reduce sensation. ^ dose regular combined (oestrogen and cops - abortion is still illegal in Queens The rhythm method, also referred to as fff progestagen) Pill, followed by two more land, after all. Vatican Roulette, is probably the least 'q tablets after 12 hours. This is designed reliable method of controlling fertility, Women can only take charge of their ^ to reduce the possiblity of conception owing to the variability of women's men lives if they can control their own repro g after unprotected sex e.g. if you forget a strual cycles (which I'm sure Pope John duction. This means either abstinence ^ Pill, if the condom breaks, or your cap Paul 11 knows just heaps about), bat at from het sex, or the separation of sex slips or whatever. It has a few side ef least it means that your partner doesn't from procreation, not such a bad idea fects - including nausea, vomitting, ir have access to your body 24 hours a anyway in this lime when overpopula-_ regular bleeding, breast tenderness, day, 365 days a year. There's Ihe lUD - tion would have lo be one ol the largest headaches etcetera. Great, huh? It forget it, unless you want to chance in (growing) problems currently facing us. won't stop you from getting AIDs or VD. fertility, cancer, hemorrhage, womb re and sometimes it doesn't even work - There's a tendency to think that wom en's control ol their own fertility is a re moval elc etc... in fact, few doctors will this has happened to me. just for the recommend them at all now. I could use record. But it is about the only way of sult of twentieth century technological advancement, that it is 'unnatural' and the new'injection* system, Depo-Provera following up accidental, unprotected sex, - oh, and risk infertility and cancer (and and has proven (usually) quite eifective women have only fixated on it in the last century. This is nol the case. There is no, they haven't finished testing il yet but I if taken before 72 hours tiave elapsed it is being widely recommended in clin after intercourse. plenty of evidence, fromold medical and anthropological texts, that women have ics all over the place -1 wonder why?). The next event was what prompted me almost un'wersallysoughtto control their And these are our choices? No doubt j to write this article. At the clink: (Toowong fertility, and most of our present anti-con- there are some of you oul there reading Medical Centre) I was shown into the 1:eption and prophylactic techniques (eg this who are screaming, well, just slop office of one Dr. J, a female physician cap, condom, abortion, lUD. spermk:ide) having all that naughty pre-marital sex, whom I unfortunately can't name owing have had precursors in earlier, less tech you promiscuous hussy!!!! But please, to publishing legalities. During the nologically advanced societies. "Gen lets be just a lad realistic - people like to check-up I presented the problem and erally speaking, the extent and openness fuck. People have always liked to fuck, my tears. Basically I went looking for a with which birth control is practised is as there's just no getting around it, and peo protessional opinion - I'd taken my Sat much dependent on a societies' altitude ple will continue to fuck for as long as it urday Pill a bit late; could I have been to sex, and the status of women, as it is feels good, in the face of moral outrage, protected? Did I need the Morning After on technology... the use of birth control life-threatening disease and any olher | Pill? Also, I'd jjst gotten Ihrough a seri requires a morality that permits the sepa variable you may care lo name. To say, ous viral illness; was my body capable ration of sexual intercourse from pro "Oh well, you just don't have sex Ihen, of handling the after effects of the Morn creation, and Is related to the extent do you!" is not only ridicufously unrealis ing After Pill? How would it upset my to which women are valued for roles tic but downright intrusive. Why shouldn't cycle? After I laid out the dilemna. I other than just those of wife or people be able to fuck whenever and asked for Dr. J's advice and was mel by mother." (Greenwood and King 169). wilh whomever they feel like? And more hesitation. Yes, It did seem like a bad That there are doctors out there who are pertinently, why shouldn't women be able time of the month for me to miss a Pill. happy to see women remain uninformed to fuck without having to worry about the Yes. it was likely that I had been unpro about their contraceptive choices, or rec risk ol pregnancy, or the health-risks in tected. No, I probably wouldn't have any ommend against certain reliable forms volved wifh the current birth control problems physically wilh the Morning of birth control because they morally dis methods available? The question really After Pill. But - no, she didn't think it was approve is scary. It says something is - If, in this technologically advanced a good idea, prescribing it for me. I was about the ways women are valued in this age, they can put men on the moon, taken aback, confused. Why wasn't the society, why can't we get safe, hassle-free Morning After Pill appropriate? Was birth control???? there something else that I hadn't heard What is even more scary is how limited about? What the hell was I supposed lo the options really are. I, for example, am That's the real question I wanted to pose do? currently on the Pill. Over fifty million in this article, apart from suggesting that women worldwide take the contracep you give the above-mentioned doctor a Finally, I soned oul whal the issue was. tive Pill. And yet the problems and side- swen/e. You have a think about it. It wasn't that the Morning After Pill was effects of pill-use are still largely inappropriate. Dr, J just didn't want lo unresearched and rema'n shrouded in Eleanor Marney prescribe il for me. And for me, light fi mystery. Wilh continued pill use I can nally dawned - Dr. J didn't want lo pre look fonvard to the high possibility of scribe il because she didn't 'believe' in cervical cancer, cardiovascular disease, Post-script: If any of you are wondering aboul what hap h. She thought it was 'amoral' or per thrombosis, liver cancer, breast cancer, pened to me at tha doctor's - well I got my sonally compromising or something, and and malignant melanoma. While on the she fett that I should just "wait and find MA Pill in the ond. Bul only altera lot of argu Pill, I could experience withdrawal and ment, and a lot of insulting, patronising ques out" if I was pregnant. Or. J was pre breakthrough bleeds, breast changes, tions aboul the regularity of my partners (im pared to advise me, in her 'professional headaches and migraine, allergies and plication: I'm promiscuous), my choee of tiirth capacity', lo play Russian Roulette with viral infections, nausea and other intes contnsl and my decision not to have chikJren my fertility and well, if I was pregnant that tinal problems. I could suffer thrush, at ttiis time - which I certainly shouldn't have would presumably just be luck of the weight gain, the increased chance ot to justify to her or anyone. I also had to listen draw, or 'God's will', wouldn't it? to Dr. J wax lyrical on Itie joys of ctiildren." rheumatoid arthritis and muscular prob and somelhing bizan-e about how woman in I have never encountered an anti-abor lems. I could ( and have, on other Pills) Bangladesh get tots from having heaps of, tion/pro-lifer doctor before, and so help experience depression, irritability, mood children in the midst of appalling poverty. me I hope I never do again. What was swings, and (on the dose I am currently Bul • I did get my pi:i. Now lefs just hope I'm positively chilling was the idea that this taking) loss of libido. But what are the olher options? I am sacrifteing my future not preggers. and Uiat my womb doesn't one 'doctor', who is supposed lo be advising day spontaneously fall out in a big, bloody, health and current personal and sexual her patients professionally, giving an cancerous blob. Alternatively. I could become unbiased, informed opinion on the issue experiences for the Pill's 99 percent re a dyke... isfTi Many students at U.Q. ore mature-age (MA). The major ity of these students are women who study port- time. In recent years there has been an abundance of rhetoric from both universities and the Federal Government on the opportunities available to women. These largely hollow sen tences have been full of promise tor women seeking to return to education, but in reality it is becoming harder than ever for MA women to become students. There are three broad obstacles to MA women seeking The majority of women who are MA are aged between a tertiary education: 22-29 years (D.E.E.T considers any student who has more than one year between the end of secondary •Initial access school and the beginning of tertiary education, not •Initial costs including deferred students, as MA). •Costs of maintaining an education and other obsta Tha'cost:of education contiriues throughout a degree. c'es. MA students also must contend v/ith the charge that The prices of Handbooks isMncreasing. H.E.C.S has they are a waste of money and a drain on the educa doubledJorlhose enrolled-in second degrees and tion economy. This disregards two things - one, MA increased fay SO per cent for, those who take a longer A)lho'uglijso!fi^|!progre^s H'as"been'made, in terms of an students have a far lower attrition rate than the normal than "normal" time to complete their degrees. equal education being given to both female and male 17-18 year old student. That is, farfev^er MA students students our education system leaves a lot to be relative to the rest of the student population, drop out of But costs are not all financial. MA women are often desired. Female sludenls are still concentrated in the uni. So education Is, in terms of success at study, supporting their families emotionally, as well as dealing humanities while males tend lo study the sciences and wasted on the younger student population. Secondly, with unsupportive partners. A lack oi support from part maths. And that is in the 1990's! A student is MA this disregards the fact that education per se benefits ners can be aggravated if the partner is unemployed. according to the Mature Age and Part Time Student society. The better educated society is the better off (MAPS) Association of Monash University, al 23 years, that society is, regardless of the age of the educated or A huge obstacle to MA women, indeed to all student and this will be the age accepted for this article. Thus, the proportion of practicing doctors, lawyers or engi parents, is the lack ol accessible, affordable, and reli anyone who went through the education system prior to neers elc. that are in that number. able childcare. The problems with the requirement for 1985, will be MA. Of course, there are many students prior bookings, often years ahead, the necessity tor who stu died before this. Once the biases inherent in our society are overcome parents to pay for childcare that they do not use and by women, there is the problem that enrolment for MA the abysmal discrepancy between tho numbers of Real attempts to redress the imbalance caused by students is not a matter of course. Enrolment requires places available and the numbers of places required, patriarchy in the life expectations of women and men greal forethought. Added lo this is the problem that all point to a syslem that is drastically in need of reform. have only really occurred in the last decade. Il can take prospective students are isolated. There is not repre decades for women to overcome the socialisation sentation available for students who must rely on those A last problem is the government's obvious agenda to effects of the family, schools, partners and general already in education to ensure that l,iey get a fair deaL push MA women into the Open Learning Programme. society. Simply to decide to come lo uni is a huge step This is an inadequate response lo the problem of a lack for many women, ll Is necessary for society to accept It is suspected that the government has told universities of university places. The only purpose it would sen/e this reality and provide ways to compensate women for lo increase the numbers of immediate school leavers at would be to further alienate and disempower MA tho limits placed on them in earlier years. the expense of MA students. This is designed to allevi women and fo hide them in the home. ate the unemployment figures. This works on the idea Even those women "lucky" enough to have made 'it to that mature-age vwmen are not in need of a serious MA women should demand from the government and university after their initial education do not have a real education, and that they can always rely on their hus their union reps that: choice in the courses they take. The lack of financial bands to support them if they can not find a job. this is assistance from the government combined with the blatant discrimination based on age, and should not be - occasional care be provided reluctance ot many families to "waste" money educat accepted. - childcare in libraries and computer rooms (it the ing a girt has resulted in women being forced to take union ever sets one up) courses that provide al lease limited income and guar ?>,.. tt f| - that government recognise the needs of student par anteed employment. Many women took up the option of lhbriaoes'^iri^fl,fe.Ori^(^nd|flff up front fees will deci- ents as being just as important as those of wcji;ing nursing or leaching which paid a minimal income mate the MA women population at universities. Many parents throughout the study years. This situation hardly adds MA women have families and are the solo providers for - access to union facilities, services and officers at up to "a choice by the woman. Yet the argument against these families. A lot of MA women receive welfare. The night MA education is often heard that '1hese people already income of these women is often low. This group will be - a method for a network for note swapping lo be had their chance". hard hit by any increases in the costs of education. It is established. an obvious example of the poverty trap. Thanks to MA women are not bored housewives going through H.E.C.S, many women with mortgages are now having Many thanks to Jacqui Robilliard, President of mid life crisis. And so what if some ot them have had to choose between a home or an education, while MAPS, for the information she provided for this such a background. Society prevented them frorn other women are not given the luxury of this "choice". article. (entering education institutions in the past, so it is their right to participate in education today. Coming to Initial access and initial costs often combine to crush University with a whole life of experience can only ben the idea of uni before it has begun. efit learning for everyone. It is time that we recognise the benefits ot diversity and differing liie experience. ^GAFFNEY' WITH THE LOVE BOAT ''What do you get when you fall in love? You only get and and so for at least until tomorrow^ I'll never fall I n love again ff - so sangeth Karen 'Richard and I are just safe but most of us eat sixteen whole onions, brother and sister' Carpenter. Love - whal the smoke fwe packets of cigarettes and drink tour fuck is it? Why do sex gods like Neil Diamond, cartons of beer before that beautiful moment (well Elton John and Rod Stewart, consistently pen even if you don'l that's what it tastes like). And tunes aboul it? What makes great men (I'm still then it happens - stars collide, juices flow and you trying to think of some great men) fall lo their share your undertongue with someone else. IM knees to the great rhythmic swoon of a couple PORTANT: Never ever see that person again if of litres of bodily fluids, bad breath and an un you think their breath tastes like the compost bin believable amount of personal responsibility? I'll alter it has been in the sun lor six weeks -.it you lell you why - sometinr>es it feels good PLUS you can see flaws already, imagine what it will be like have someone else to blame when you feel bad. once the honeymoon is over. I have decided to lay out the ins and the outs of WHERE DID THIS ARM COME FROM? love (pun certainly intended), and before you Sex. The first lime you do do 'it' with someone switch off and start reading the next story, don't new and you actually like them it is supposed to worry, this is not going to be a giriie-hormonal be very 'cosmically' beautiful. The problem is usu spiel about the beautiful rainbows of paradise ally you worry aboul whether you are doing eve emerging from my somewhat faulty libido. rything rightan d if they are enjoying it. Sometimss BREATH LIKE THE this can slop you from having a good time - never COMPOST ARER SIX WEEKS IN THE SUN do this because essentially all that matters is that Although love is a many splendoured thing, it you gel off (here's where all of my friends begin to seems the road to actually falling in love with wonder about my sex life - it's only a story folks). someone is indeed a reaiiy fucking bumpy one Whether lo do the oral thing, dealing with the ar (kind ot like the roads in tower socio-economic ray of rubber accessories of the safer sex era, areas). You l.ave to have the first date, unless and the fact that you always have one arm that you get really drunk or stoned and find yourself gets in the way can be bothersome but hey, con waking up beside someone who you have spent centrate on cumming and everything will be fine. the nighl drinking the giddy wine of desire with Hopefully passion will gel the better of you and and decided that this attraction cannot be denied you just won't care about any of these superflu (personal experience has led me to believe that ous matters, If not, stop It, There are no rules in this is not a basis lor love but in lact the 'Fuck I the big old game of love and certa'nty don't feet am never gobig to drink'or smoke again' phe obligated to have sex wilh someone even if they nomenon). If you do things the right way (do you tell you they will get blue balls and they'll drop off like this little judgennental tum of phrase? I'm kind (God 1 love that one - Imagine what it would look of proud of it) you v/ill have to have the first dale. . like?). Forthe heterosexual men: ramemberyour goal in life is to seiye and pjease.women and that First dates can enlaila Hdyts 8; dinner anywhere but Sizzler or Pizza Hut:-going to see a local means reiTieniberlnathaffey can f^^ 'grunge' band; if you aire that way inclined, The Big Kahuna (does this sound like a slang term YOUR FRIENDS HATEiviiE DON'T THEY? for the male appendage to anyone else?); or tor Once dating, you have to get around to telling both the more risque, videos at home. Picnics in the sets of friends about this match made in heaven. Botanical Gardens, doing anything at Southbank If you have the same sat of friends, you score or doing the International Socialist Meeting to 1 extra points for incestuousness (I still don'l be- gether score extra points for romantic schmaltz. ;| lieve that Karen and Rfchard were just brother and O.K. so you have completed the intended plan sister). Usually you v^ill think that the love of your for the night; you have decided whether your ife's friends are wankers. This Is because they date is the kind of person you'd be willing to hate change, and you are change, and they'll share some more of your precious lime with, or never let you forget K. It could be Jealously, H could that Ihey are what your Ancient History teacher be that now the numbers are wrong for games of lovingly referred to as a Simian - now to the big Trivial Pursuit, it could be that you aren't as friendly decision - will I hit a home run and if not, how or attractive as their last partner, or it could be many bases am I prepared lo go to? I usually i that you are the most socially unadjusted piece ot prefer to bunt on the first date and slick lo a bit shh to walk this earth (this is what i think of some of tongue pashing and see where it leads me. of my friends' partners). Don't worry though, you Now the angst of the first kiss is comparable to hate them just as much as they hate you and, of that of a pap smear. People in PK ads play il course, your friends don't like your choice either. The current love of my life (my God, how did I survive the last twenty-five years without this fairytale; this romantic para TEN TIPS TO dise?) and I have shocked, angered, in spired disbelief and humour with our bliss ful and steamy union - and wow - all that ABEAUTBFUL ROSTGRADUAT E RESEARCH time we thought we had no street cred and were completely insignilicant - v/e ROMANCE SCHOLARSHIPS 1994 were wrong. The more furore your rela tionship causes the better - everybody loves controversy; everybody loves a .'\n inicrnationally rccognlsod re.st'arcti Jnsdiuiion, Minders loser if you really want to piss your friends University invites graduaies lo apply for the folk)\vinK oH even more - dump both sets of trlends IRead Jane Seymour's best sellers A Guide postgraduate researcli scholarships offered in 199 i for and become totally dependent on each to Romantic Living at\d A Guide to Roman full-time Ph.D and re.search .Masters degree programmes in other (you can make up with your "they tic Living With Someone Else. Not only do a wi(.le range of research areas: just don't understand me's" v,'hen you split they explain how to be so extremely pathetic up wiih your "reason for living"). that your partner will feel guilty about leav IT'S NOT THAT I DON'T LOVE YOU.... ing you, they also have beauty tips. *Australian Postgraduate Awards (APAs) This usually occurs three to six months with stipend into the relationship. It is sometimes ^ Remember that no one will love you if called settling in; it's real definition is you are not very similar to the beauty myth Priority award p.rea.s for 199.1 are: boredom. If you have taken my advice ideal. Ladies: never let your partner see you Biotechnology and .Molecular Biology and dumped both sets of friends and without make-up and never ever let your Chemislrv' become co-dependent, you will really get partner see you with unsightly hair anywhere Cultural Sludies: Australia & Asia sick of and resentful of each other. Do at all except on your head of course, which Engineering not panic - this is normal. AH of these Environmental Sciences feelings will culminate into a talk (usu should be long and lush. Gentlemen: well of Information Sciences ally in bed late at night when one of you course there aren't as many rules for you Marine Biology is really tired) and will end in tears. Most although back hair is a bit of a beauty myth Medical Science of the time the phrases: "It's not that 1 no-no as Is acne scarring but you could use Psychology don't love you..."; It is just a break...."; "I these to advantage In the 'rugged good Physics just need some space..."; etc; will be ut looks' category. tered and you will definitely 'have sex for the last lime'. This is the ugliest part 0 Never share any bodily functions with •Flinders University Research Scholarships of c\ relationship, not because it is emo your partner (ie farting, shitting, waxing, tionally turgid, but because you make a flossing, teeth brushing, vomiting, under (FURS) complete and utter fool of yourself. You arm smells, etc). Applicants must have completed tlie equivalent of four run around to all of your old friends and years in full-time study and should hold a Isi Class, or tell them how stupid you were and how 0 Never comment negatively about your High 2A, Honours degree or equivalent. fucked your ex is - and thenyou get back partners sexual prowess. Although pop psy with 'the biggest tuckwil in the worid'. chology recommends that sex is something The awards are tenurable for up to two years for Masters Getting back together is always a high to be shared, don't be fooled, it Is in fact candidates and three and a half years for Ph.D candidates. point of the relationship but don't gel too something you do to someone else. If you APAs with Stipend currently pay in the range of $14,474 cosy because you'll be sick of them aren't enjoying sex then it must be some to $18,679 p.a. and FURS, $12,3(X) p.a. The scholarships again in three to four weeks. If you are a thing that you are or aren't doing. are lax exempt and subject to indexation. HECS real masochisl you will continue splitting exemption, relocation and thesis allowances are also up, getting back together, splitting up. 0 Remember that sex is not something provided. getting back together, etc for a least six beautifully created and experienced through months lo a year (I did this with Jacob's the people involved, it is a skill. One must •Postgraduate Course Awards father for two years - pretty good record work at sex so that you become the best; These awards may be available to sludenls wishing to huh?). Of course, my relationship with better than any other partner your partner undertake an approved Masters degree by coursework my own little fairytale is completely dif may have had. It must appear as though you offered at the University, A stipend, HECS exemption, ferent and it will never happen with us relocation and thesis allowance will be provided. (yes, you are allowed lo laugh uproari are a faultless fuck or they will leave you ously or vomit now). and you will never get a husband or wife. IT'S ALL JUST A BEAUTIFUL ^Always keep a clean house. Application forms and further informal ion are available FAIRYTALE... ^Never allow your partner to meet your fam from; When you are in the early throes of love ily (embarrassing as hell that they are). and passion, it is easy to be blinded by The Scholarships Officer, Officer of Research irrationality and those revived bodily Q Never be a single parent unless you are Flinders University of South Australia functions and fluids. Now, you can re male (what a sensitive guy) or your 'husband' GPO Box 2100 ally angst out on this and worry continu died in a really creddy way (ie The Gulf War, Adelaide SJL 5001. ally that this delusion will all fall apart and skiing in Gstaad, Arctic explo.-ing, sponta Telephone: (08) 201 2759, Fax (08) 201 2035 leave you as a really ugly stain on soci neous combustion, etc). ety and your friends shoulders; or you Applications must be received by 31 October 1993 can ju.st enjoy it for what it is - a beautiful Ql If you are getting on (over twenty and fairytale. Everyone, including the people you still can't find anyone, get really drunk involved, knows it will all disintegrate at a crowded nightclub and you're bound to someday but why not stretch 'it out and IF YOU'VE DONE YOUR RESEARCH find someone (let's face it, at that age beg make it last for as long as you can. The ... You'll choose Flinders! absolutely wonderful thing about love is gars can't be choosers). that it makes you so light (thanks Mr (j^ Never ever say "I love being single", "I'm Kundcra) and allows you lo enjoy a lot just not ready for a relationship", "I'm wait of normally restrained elements of your FLINDERS ing for the right person", etc because no- personality. Besides, being loved and one will believe you and when you do start UNIVERSITY loving someone in return is a really seeing someone, everyone will remind you groovy feeling and sure helps pass the ADELAIDE AUSTRALIA time pleasantly. of all of these thoroughly inodern comments KILEY GAFFNEY made in a lonely, bitter and twisted state. iii Congratulations on purchasing the WE EN I EWORLD^" system - the complete guide to the WEENIE^" wonder land ! In the pages that follow, you will be initiated ^corne V^o into the fantastic arena of roleplaying and comics. Even if you are new to this subculture, don't panic! This sim ple introductory guide will tell you everything you need to know. In the mere blink of an eye, you too will be exitedly recounting your fabulous adventures to your amazed friends! In WEENIEWORLD^" you can be any thing that you want to be; you may, in reality, be Jane Smith, a plain, nondescript computer analyst, b'Jt in the WEENIEWORLD""^ universe you can be (A. |I)LcLycr''s CJ ulcic) Johannes Skullcrusher, conqueror of the world, slayer of dragons, and rescuer of fair gender-neutral persons in distress! The choices of what you can do, and what Michelle an? you can be, are only limited to your imagination". WEE- Cameron, world NIEWORLD^'^ is a place where trees can talk, space ships punch across the unknown void, dragons walk the renowned WEENIES, earth, and magic is real. We trust that you will enjoy take YOU into the your journey through WEENIEWORLD™, just as much as wide and wonderful we have enjoyed bringing it to you! world of non-tradi tional hobh'uj, thatij,'/ /. ROLEPLAYING GAMES- What are they and are they a contact sport? the What we are talking about here is your basic roleplaying game WEENIEWORLD of J (RPG). For those people who have never come across these things, they are not avante garde theatrical experiments, not roleplaying ganie^ and i something you get together to do in self improvement ther comicj. apy. They are in fact an imagination generated world run by v/hat we like to call a game master (GM or dungeon master - DM) in which each person (player) has a character (PC) who has certain defined qualities, expressed as statistics, skills and equipment. Each player controls the actions of their PC in response to situations presented by the GM (or God). The whole point ofa roleplaying session is to successfully work to achieve goals and avoid obstacles set by the GM; interact with other PCs and Non player-characters (controlled by the GM; think of them as extras) and watch their character's per sonality and skills develop. A series of such gaming sessions Is generally called a campaign. This process is accompanied by much dice rolling, shouting and gnashing of teeth. WUtmena .flood, alone, at tht threjhold. Blood ran from jeverai dmail cuU on her arnu and tordo. She redUd one hand on the migfity longjword at her jtde, cojting her gaze around the room, searching for dome clue OJ toitj jecretJ. WhyeLe would il be JO well protected if not for jome great treasure within? She tlnnh back, over all the companioiu jhe bad Icjt: the valiant Eleanor, kin? Rudemary, and tlie great magician Terete. Site u alone notv, an?, oj J he wait.), figured hegin moving wilhin amongdt the rackd of dtrange tomed. A table dtandd before her and dhe trembled a.i jhe realided dhe faced the beadt dhe thought wad a myth: The Midoggnutic Gamed Storeowner... I. wometsj IN fioiepLAyiNQ. As you embark, wide-eyed and expectant on your life as a WEENIE™, you are bound to notice some alarming similarities between WEENIEWORLD™ and the real one. There is a fear some and powerful monster in the WEENIEWORLD"^ that is not described in any rulebook. And yet it lurks and lurks, as monsters are wont to do, casting a pall of dread over ai socially aware WEENIES^". This paragon of evil is called SEX ISM. For, although roleplaying gives people this chance tt' leave the problems of the real worid behind, some of then are bloody persistent... This can become immediately evident for some of thos- would-be gamers tiying to start out. If you ars female, you may never have been encouraged to look for escapism in the first place, let alone in a brave new world which is perceived to be a violent and logic driven one. The activities undertaken in the Science Fiction/Fantasy universe (this Includes role playing, comics, novels and films) are those typically per ceived as masculine activities, such as exploration, superior strength, success at any cost, and generally going where no MAN has gone before. Hmm.. Surmounting these ridiculous assumptions can in fact he quite difficult, and unfortunately for those few WEENIE"-' women out there, this is not the last of their problems. They search valiantly for a group of roleplaying WEENIES'" with which to commune, only to find that most gaming groups are filled by men, mn by men, for men. These little male spheres can be penetrated (deliberate phallic metaphor). In fact, mosl WEENIES'"^ are eager lo share the joy! Once safely settled in a haven of escapism, however, one begins to notice insidious little sexisms al! around you, biting you.- ankles. These critters fall into two main groups (although they are fofid of inter breeding). Firstly, gaming rulebooks and supplements are usually stuffed with non-Inclusive language. Yes, that's right, the all perva sive "HE". One may well wonder how characters keep the species going with so many HEs around. The blatant disre gard of a female audience Is usually prefaced by a neat dis claimer, such as: A NOTE ON SYNTAX: In this book theo n with others) and Empathy are not tending to be someone terms 'he", "him" and 'his' will be neariy as important as being able to who doesn't really exist, impressive SCATDSOCXL used generically for both sexes. hit things really hard or cast really big along with a group of peo 6)C IN K BOX. Attempts at less chauvinistic terms - spells that kill people. pie who are also pretend "he/she" or '(s)he' - were found to Some may say that It Is a positive ing to be people who Comic book buying is another of those be both artificial and clumsy. thing that women/female characters don'l really exist, all talk areas where women are few and far From James Bond 007 RPG • Victory can take "male" attributes.-Our point ing excitedly about things between, and if you are a female comic Games, 1983. is that men/male characters are not that never happened and buyer you will be subject to all the usual This serves to exclude women, and rewarded in the same way if they take which bear absolutely no even the possibility of female charac "female" attributes. Not as much loot resemblance to the REAL prejudices described above. Remarkably ters, which is a very nasty thing can be won by being a quiet, caring, worfdf You really should few women actually buy comics for them Indeed. While some gaming systems understanding healer, herbalist or a get out more and develop selves, as wc discovered when we are quite sound, you have to sift cleric, as by being a knight, archer, a life of your own." In through a lot of crap before you find wizard or a magician. Perhaps it is no such circumstances the approached the three main comic stores in one (Vampire and Star Wars are good joke at all thai the Rolemaster (one of word WEENIE'" becomes Brisbane for some impressive statistics for examples of equality in gaming sys the many roleplaying games available) a highly insulting label; so our article. And here they are,- tems). Persevere, persevere, perse spell list Midwifery is the laughing much so that many peo vere! stock of most players. pie deny their essential Only 5% of customers were women, and The next, although not so blatant Although these fads may discourage WEENIE'^ness and go to at Comics Etc where there are 400 comic male biased characteristic of roleplay and depress some of you would-be great lengths to conceal storage boxes reserved for regular cus WEENIES"^, do not give up you quest. it. And who can blame ing games are the actual statistics of tomers, only five (count 'em, that's five!) the characters themselves. It may We are not saying that gaming is an them? Who in their right take a gaming newcomer (or even a avatar of all that is wrong in the world mind would self-identify belonged to women. Five! Only five, that's veteran) a while to notice, but all the and needs lo be lorn down from its wilh such a bunch of bloody amazing-,. key slalislics are qualities tradition pedestal and trampled upon. There losers? ally associated with masculinity: are pleasant, socially aware and will Recently, however, there has been a ing to be educated WEENIES'" out can be; J.O'Barr's incessant quota Strength, Constitution, Willpower, slight change in these popular atti tion of Cure lyrics throughout his Strength, Intelligence, and Strength. there. Some may need some small tudes. This year, for example, it is encouragement before they come gothic revenge comic The Crow, and Now, we do not suggest fpr a moment somewhat unusual to find a student Neil Caiman's quotation of Roland that women do nol possess these around lo the correct point of viev/ newspaper that doesn't have a (like threatening their entire collection Barthes in Signal to Noise are good attributes, not that some of them are reviews page that is dedicated to examples. Many of those exciting new also associated with women. The of Rolemaster supplements with a comics (hint, hint...). Rolling Stone match, or colouring in all the numbers comic writers can be found printed point is, that lo "succeed" as a char magazine, the bible of corporate rock, under DC comic's new Vertigo line, a acter, s/he must cultivate ruthless- on their dice with a NIKKO pen), but each year in their "HOT" issue note they WILL. line that offers the best of this "new ness, great physical/mental strength, that reading comics and roleplaying wave" in essential WEENIE™ reading. and a jolly impressive set of biceps. are steadily becoming very creddy (For (urther information regarding "Female" characteristics such as 2. WEENIEWORLD^^': things to do. Comic and game stores WEENIE™ comics and the issues they Intuition, Presence (how well you get are even beginning to attract cus are nov/ dealing with, check out the LIFE IS SHORT. tomers who are socially capable and PLAY HARD. article by fellov/ WEENlE^"-in-arins. have a certain degree of streetcred. Tim Mansfield.) At this stage many This change in attitude is due to a Similarly, there has been a movement of you would-be brave new movement at work in WEE- W0Nt)eRtKNr). (although not as strong as in the WEENIES'" might NIEWORLD''-', a movement of vision You may have observantly noticed thai one of the writers comics worid) lo make roleplaying a be having second ary people who are seeking to totally creddy and more equality oriented of this artide is a woman, Me, I've been a gamer for thoughts about redefine what it means to be a WEE thing lo do. Recently published around five years now, and have played in a fairly large plunging headlong NIE™, to push the envelope as it games such as Vampire (and every variety of different systems, mostly with two main groups into WEE- were, break the rules and do the olher game published by White Woli) of fellow gamers, I am the only female player in bolh of NIEWORLD^'''. and impossible; make WEENIEWORLD™ and Cyberpunk are attempting to these groups. The fact that I'm still with these groups indi embracing the "hip." lifestyle of a WEE change roleplaying from an act of cates Ihal I'm pretty happy vidlh their efforts to include me This movement is strongest in the NIE™. No doubt mere escapism into a forum in which as a woman, and to attempt to counter most of the sc; ~ X nn? take a quick glance at the list at the you, a would*e WEENIE™ who Is just end of the article. You may (eel that starting out, Is to purchase our sup this Is an awful lot to buy, but rest plement "Guide to Avoiding Pitfalls assured that it is not essential that and Ripoffs", which sells for a mere-^ Want to Study you purchase every product. Also, thirty dollars al any good comic or rest assured that this is not a manip games store. Law? ulative scheme intended to exploit you, our valued customer. But also 4. END BIT: IN WHICH rest assured that il you don't own at WE CONCLUDE OUR UNE-Northem Rivers (Lismore), on the beautiful least half of these products, you will INTRODUCTION. NSW North Coast, offers a be made to feel that you have missed out on some of the most innovative So there you have it, the trials and and exciting merchandising ever. tribulations of WEENIEWORLD™. For You may not realise it, but WEE- the WEENIE™ convert it may still Graduate Law Degree NIEWORLD™ is big business, and in seem to be a confusing and compli this section we're blowing the whistle! cated place. You may feel lost, roam This fully accredited program gives shidents the In the realm of roleplaying games, lor ing the unchartered wilderness, alone opportunity to gain significant practical experience example, writers will often neglect to and unguided. Bul here at WEE publish necessary or helpful data in NIEWORLD™. we like to think that through a unique academic year and course structure. the original mlebook. This information we're a star to steer by. And if you Classes commence January 10,1994 will then be published separately in think that sounds wanky and preten the form of an "optional" njles sup tious - you're absolutely right. If any Applications close October 29,1993 plement wliich every player will feel thing, we hope that you have taken obligated lo buy. This then, will be fol this article with the pinch (read "truck- load") of salt that we put into writing Further information and application form are available lowed by a second rules supplement. from the Faculty of Law and Criminal Justice And a third. Then, no doubt after you it. Keep in mind, however, that the have bought a veritable tonne of worid of roleplaying and comics is an these "optional" supplements, the interesting and challenging form of games company will release a revised escapism for both women and men, edition of the original rulebook which which expresses new and innovative totally outdales the first edition, and ideas in an unusual and enleitaining way. UNE the whole process of publishing NORTHERN RIVERS "optional" rules supplements berjns Remember, WEENIEWORLD™ really is again. wonderful! PO Box 157, Lismore NSW 2480 Telephone (066) 20 3109 Fax (066) 22 4167 Similariy, in the worid of comics, just buying one comic is never enough. 5. ABOUT THE AUTHORS Please supply me v/ith further information/an application form (delete The first comic that you buy regularly . CAMERON EELES: CAMERON SPENT if applicable) for the Batchelor of Laws program. will crossover every so often witji FIVE TORTURED YEARS TRYING TO another monthly comic. Curious about DENY HIS TRUE WEENIE'" SELF BY Name: TAKING REFUGE IN THE SEEDY this other comic, you decide to begin WORLD OF SEX. DRUGS AND ROCK i to buy it regularty also. This, in turn, ROLL, NEEDLESS TO SAY, HE DID Address:, leads you to another comic, which NOT SUCCEED, AND IS NOW leads you to another, which leads you UNASHAMED OF HIS HERITAGE AND Postcode: Ph: to the "stand alone" thirty dollar spe HAPPY TO ADMIT HE SPENDS UP TO cials and deluxe editions, and so on. 10 HOURS AT A TIME PRETENDING The above mentioned Vertigo line, TO BE SOMEBODY ELSE. while being very creddy, is an excel HE HAS NO PETS lent example ot this. • HicHELLE KING: MICHELLE REAOS As you can see. WEENIEWORLD™ is LOTS OF BOOKS ABOUT THINGS THAT fraught with many dangers, perils, DON'T REALLY EXIST, AND FEELS and the odd ripoff. Our suggestion to SHE HAS GAINED A LOT QF CRED BY ACTUALLY 3 E I fJ G ONE OF FIVE woHEN AT COMICS ETC... WITH A BOX. SHE STUDIES weeNie^^'J^iHi' with Boo SOCIOLOGY AND WOMEN'S There will doubtless be those amongst STUDIES AND SO OBVIOUSLY REALLY KNOWS WHAT SHE'S you, hordelings ot style that you are, who TALKING ABOUT. THAT LAST might regard the phrase 'weenie'" style' PHRASE HAS A JOKE. as oxymoronic. Personally, I do not self- HER RAINCOAT SUE IS lO. identify as a 'weenie^"', bul such is my commitment to exploring fashion that I OTHER AVAILABLE have had occasion to delve into its grimierj WEENIEWORLD^^^ side, the world of gaming couture. VPRODUCFS: If only weenie™ s took as much time coor-| ^^'i^-^->^l^'" V:'EEKL )". Ou r dinating their wardrobes as they do creat- "'^^'''•''•'' »"'S"^'"^ covering ing their characters. Alas, the average ";*';'^ '"'' '" -t^^/"^"'"-''^ weenie™ is recognisable for three princi "°' ' \XW025: Weeme World Alios: pal features: with this fabulous, fully illus 1. An ancient gaming t-shirt, which, if trated guide, you 'It always once white, is now grey (and if once know exactly where you are! black, is now grey) bearing the logo of a \V\\'666: Weenie World heavy-metal band consisting of a super- Compendium of Monsters- naturally buxom 'warrior-wench' clad in a Chocka o' block of all those few strands of chainmail, or else proclaim bcasties you love to bate ing the wearer's attendance at a Con five (including the much awaited statistics on the Mysiognistic years previously. Store Owner)! 2. A pair of scuffed, off-white sneakers, W\V70: Weenie World Game purchased at K-mart sometime before the master's screen: Hide your evil decline ot Cimmeria (little gaming gag for plans while keeping a vast Sedacalm you weenie™ s out there). amount of useless data at vour 3. A pair of fleecy-lined track-pants fingertips! A MUST HAVE! stretclied in the knees. Includes the niini-adventurc, Sedacalm relieves the stress of nervous But this does not have to be the way. "H7)o Stole the Raincoats?"! tension during exams - naturally. Readers! The road is open to change fhe Coming soon ... world of weenie™ wear for the better! Just u\'enie^"worhi^^ . Totally Sedacalm is a non-habit forming traditional herbal remedy and is keep in mind thai gaming fashion should invalidates etviylhing you ever bought. useful for the promotion of calm restful sleep. be comfortable but stylish. Wear nothing Permission to Photocopy for that will become annoying over a long Personal Use only, night's hacking and slaying. Of course 10% STUDENT DISCOUNTr TUNE UPS (4) (6) (8) cyls $30 +parts ^GREASE AND OIL CHANGES $20 + oil and filter (if required) ^ WHEEL ALIGNMENTS* *free brakes and front end checks come in for friendly service srPH 369 6288 SERVICING THE WESTERN SUBURBS FOR OVER 20 YEARS NOW RELOCATED AT MILTON ON THE WAY TO UNI COL PEARSON AUTOMOTIVE 14 Railway T"orraoo IVlilton I ieaching English as a Foreign Lan all desperate for English as the only way In January for an accessible $2400 |guage outside Australia is a serious they were ever going to get a job in a (approx). If you're bored making papier wori< prospect for that longed-for defer country with 20% unemployment, where mache out of all those ten dollar notes ral /dropout/postgraduatlon jaunt. Think It's not so unusual to stay at home till and In a hurry to go, apply now - an of It: your chance to experience the per you're thirty, cramming forthe alhencono alternative Is the Postgraduate Diploma fect combination of learning and con passing exam system or saving the pit or the Graduate Certificate In TESOL of tinual creation! To hear someone say tance/fortune you earn against the rainy fered at the same centre but through exactly what they mean because they day when you wake up and decide it re the university. For information on the haven't got the vocabulary for bullshit! ally Is about time you got married. Class former ring TESOL Programmes on 365 But wait all you wanton carefree 1-have- "discussions " were avalanches of in 6565 or go to the 3rd floor of the Joyce no-tles frollckers...reality doesn't stop formation. Ackroyd Building; for the 'after contact for $20 departure tax. English means UQ enrolments. If you want the RSA I left the fold-out lounge of the old jobs forthe ones who know it best now, Cert it's probably still cheaper to do it woman I'd boarded with for two months and what you do in a classroom can in elsewhere, in Spain I paid about $1500 and against better judgement but des terfere dramatically with your students' plus accomodation. (NB most teach perate to escape the old witch's accus attitude to learning...."and on the forti ing staff on this campus would fall the ing forefinger, moved in with English eth day the prophet said to Aaron 'never course.) speakers. For five months I bumbled tap the stone more than five times' and through class after class towards the he was gone "...yeah, yeah, yeah. OK- Penniless, and in the throes of post-in summer holidays. Summerln l\fladrid Is tensive course depression, 1 had to stay thls is what happened to me - its a bit when shops close for a month because with several friends over September and Eurocentric but as far as I know applies no-one in their right minds or who even arrived back In Madrid at the beginning fairly generally. has vague ambitions about staying sane of October to a job at the same dodgy \ arrived in Madrid with the intention of hangs around during August. A July academy, which I took out of despera staying for a month to do a safe little Intensive course with ten people In a tion and lack of funds. If you ever try Intensive course in Spanish with a gag hot little upstairs classroom was enough teaching In Europe, do remember the gle of Australians and New Zealanders to send me reeling off to the post of long, long summer holidays often with let loose on the city, and then leaving to fice to mail an enrolment form for an out work. (There is a glimmer of hope in rejoin my Arts degree where I'd left off. RSA (Royal Society of the Arts) Certifi the form of summer camps but it can Within about 5 days of arriving and few cate intensive teaching course in the keep glimmering until I get to it later.) rousing conversations with some fellow cooler north of the country. After an A couple of us were housed t^ the kindly desperados I was reconsidering and interview In Madrid I got let Into it by parents of a friend until we managed to swinging in the balance. A final deci mistake. I'd forgotten to put my date of take control of the wilderness of prefilled sion and a jittery but stubborn phone birth on the form: you were supposed apartments and find ourselves places call to a couple of stunned parents had to be 21 or over and I was nineteen but to live. The criteria this time was Span me planted firmly and indefinitely where they didn't find out until the end of ish-speaking flatmates. (Nine months I was. And so tlie interminable pattern course party when I got a bit pissy and struck me as quite a while to be In a of study-holiday-studysummer-study told the teacher trainer. country having barely any contact with was broken. It had been some fourteen people who belonged there. If your main years of schooling, and all of a sudden Paying for the course itself took all my aim was to leam the language.) There i saw whal it must feel like to be told savings. It was, however, well worth It. were classes, of course, but now ( had you could leave and go for a swim after The focus was on learning how to im a few Spanish words to choose from. having to shift a pile of bricks from one prove continually rather than on a strict You must learn some of the language If corner to another In prison for months. formula. International House Schools you don't want to end up Insulated In a I met other English speakers, found a provide these basic 4-week training stagnant pool of I'm-bringlng-Engllsh-to- job In a shoddy little academy- and was courses and a RSA Certificate is widely the-world missionary types. In order to thrown into a classroom with a teach recognised. A big plus is that an A or B leam, also avoid people who are after er's book. I wanted to learn Spanish grade allows you to work for IH, a chain free private English tutors as flatmates more than I wanted to teach English, a of the most advanced language centres when doing the apartment search - and common phenomena amongst the trav in terms of teaching methodology. They there are heaps of them. elling teaching breed - not great foryour offer a relaxed atmosphere and moti motivation or for the students, but at vated staff, no stupid dress codes and So it was back to work and with a least that type of eagerness allows you effective teaching. A mention of IH on vengance. Inspired, with two other RSA to learn atx)ut whom you're teaching, I your CV for future job applications will graduates I attempted to channel the was given classes of both adults and be your best asset. UQ TESOL (Teach huge stockpile of ideas In the big red kids (I had to learn the language pretty ing English to Speakers of Other Lan folder of notes I had collected. We fast CO be able to handle their capers), guages) Programmes in the Joyce chopped bits of coloured card and pic Ackroyd building are running a course tures from magazines and planned u- iisa nb ONvs WHAT'S IT LIKE TO TEACH ENGLISH Christina Koch went to Spain and found out. per warm-up activities and drill games. sound like a local and =J carefree travel Applications for any kind of teaching It lasted about six weeks purely on the ler of the worid simultaneously, did my work are normally made Ihrough the Di force of our own mctivation but the en worst at convincing them not to go back rector of Studies. Now that everything thusiasm then began to dull somewhat ..."forget the Law degree..you hale il has tightened up in Europe illegal work in the absence of any kind of encour ...you knov/ you do." is just about the only option for most agement from our employer, who wasn't Austraians who don'l possess that When all that hypey happy stuff v/as over magic Euro - passport . In Spain, at in the least bit interested in what we there was v/ork to be done looking for did inside the classroom as long as no- least. such work is still available. We're avenues of escape from the ex- pat talking dodgydodgy work conditions, but one complained and tried to withdraw scene. I took up theatre classes and their enrolment. Only the teachers kept this can be true even if you're legal. workshops purely out of interest and dis P!ease....l know it sounds soooo that place running to vaguely profes covered them to be a likely candidate sional standards. So eventually prepa obvious.,...just don't sign anylhingthat's forthe elusive PERFECT WAY to learn a in a language you don't know, no mat ration forclasses diminished all round. language. All the most advanced lan An IH job at that stage would have pro ter how nicely the charmingly format guage teachi;ig methods are based person behind the desk explains il to duced some very different results. I had ' around the principles of making stu you. A friend once got cheated out of been intending to leave as soon as I dents comfortable, relaxed and ready $1000 that way and she couldn't really had the opportunity to wori< elsewhere to learn, and putting them in siluations spare t at the time. She didn't report bJt then came the amnesty. where they are forced to use what they them for double dealing because it know. Normally this is done by the use Up to this point almost all the employ meant ten of her wori^mates would have of roleolays snd dinky games which are ees of "The English Academy" had been been out of a job. never carried to their full potential be working there illegally. Australians and cause of the restrictions of a classroom Americans were all getting a bit anxious The last job I had was with Linguarama. setting. In a theatre space relaxation about the rumour of a government clap- The name tells the story. Corporate ex techniques, voice work, improvisations down on illegal workers and ploitation at its finest. Ties and execu and de-inhibition exercises which put deportations and things. Then the boss tive clothing ....I thought I'd subvert it everyone on an equal footing can be made her big clinching move and offered but it gol down lo "dof those desert combined ir a manner which breaks to sponsor us all through the Amnesty boots or you're out", so I put on my down the "I native- you foreigner" prob for illegal workers introduced by the submissive face and shuffled off, agree lem, instils confidence and alows for Ministry of Work and Immigration to re ing with the director of studies that no I optimal learning. I certainly fojnd it in duce the number of illegal immigrants wasn't really sorry was I. I survived be finitely more productive than silting in a working in the country. Like any proc cause ll vvas only a few hours a day and "Spanish as a 2nd Language" class with ess mvolvingthe pitilic service in Spain. i nad a weeked job in a bar and a cou ten other fceigners speaking to each it involved a large time commitment on ple 01 private classes to keep me go other in bad Spanish or in English. the part of the consumer. A couple of ing. In a worid of illegal work the pri months later, after a lot of running vates are a good low-risk alternative. So again it was summertime snd living around to cement blocX government They're very lucrative and il's quite pos was easy the fish were jumpin' and the buildings , handing in every document sible to live on the proceeds, the one cotton was high....well there wasn't any that could possibly be used as proof ol draw-pack being the irregularity i( slu cotton bul there was lots of brown grass our existence and movements, we went denls are sick/on holidays/can't be and mountains because I sco'ed a job to have our thumbs squashed onto bothered that day. They're not the best teaching a mere three hours a day with inkpads and walk away with the little choice to go for in the stmmer months, full board in a camp for 6-14 year-olds. blue permits which we would have to but during the academic year a slither There was a bar next lo the pool in the flash when our ID was demanded in the of organization can mean a good deal river down the road. That was a very street. Being blond and female, that of money, flexibility and time on your lucky find: most camps requi'e teach wasn't really a problem - two Americans hands. ers to work as monitors as well. It's of Korean and Indian extraction amongst very draining labour but after a I running our number were the ones who got taken I left eventually because if I'd stayed I around in the sun for a tew weeks isn't in for not having the thing on them. would have stayed forever. I wanted to so dreary. see what il was really like here again be cause I'd forgotten. We are spoilt little By the time that was all finishedi t was Intensive courses are another option for shits to live here. And,.. Shut up!.-yes....- January, and thoughts of my disappear short-term mrk. I managed to do the you with the funny hair.... Brisbane's not ing postponed themselves to the end Inlernationai House thing for a month boring, you are. But you kids toddle off of the academic year in June. Now with and il was quite a relief to see real learn overseas and have a lovely time. my roots piercing the surface I got to ing happening, engineered by profes entertain a few Brisbane backpackers sionals who, despite their long term Give me a ring in a few months when passing through on the Eurall experi commitment, were relaxed and creative. my feet start to itch a little. ence: showed them the sights, tried to 3H3ll3d O • Words by Tim Mansfield HABBITS Pictures by Brett Lethbrldge I Tpheir talent for tribute has brought them into collaboration with ex- Beatles and Beach Boys. San Francisco's auteurs of retro JELLYFISH stunned punters at Metropolis last Sunday with a stage act and musicianship that proves they're anything but spineless. What we're talking here is fair/ lights. Eogles' diummer, Sturmer fronts the performance, though. They pby TAK E ALL THE BEST BJTS cardboard stars, a gold glitter backdrop band. He's olso got Henley's voice, superbly and they con all sing • sing from 60s ard 70s rock and throw it inlo artd some beiiously silly costumes, and Q talent for writing songs uncannily like those high choral bits on the a melling pof. Add wilty, non-clicbed like Henley's. And wonderful posture, I Queen albums - and they ao it often. lyrics, and let it set, "Well, yeah, every guy has go! his own might add. They should be playing stadiums, ond thing going. We're all very loud in our Fiist appearing in 1989 wilh the olbum there was a sense of witnessing own woy still," admits Manning, who Put all four of them together at the front Bellykulton weoring outrageously something olmosl too speciaf in the was resplendent behind the keyboard of the stage, and you've got magic: colouifu! Dr Seuss style geai; hailed b>' suddenly liny Metropolis interior on on Sunday night in figh' leopard-skin intensef*/ groovy modern pop with o l^clling Stone as (he best debut of the Sunday. But why no mega hils for ponts, spotted craval ard insane platted seventies flavour bul unparalleled year; Jellyfish have jusI linished their first Jellyfish? bbcf. cope. Surely nobody in the musical skill. "The show is charac Australian Icur supporting, of all people, seventies ever actually wore ihis gear. terised by a lot of live harmonies," says 'A lot of people lob us inlo this Retro Died PfRtfy. Not even on Bulch Cassidy and the Manning. 'In addition to the vocals I try bag but ihal's not what we're about. "Yeah, it's pretty fbshy for an opening Sundance Kids . Tim, Jelly's limitbssly to do a lol of the orchestrations on the We're about tiying to make contempo slot," says keyboard/guitar/vcxralist talented bassist, wore gorgeous striped keyboard. But some songs ate just rary pop." and, dore I say, backbone of Jellyfish's trousers and o mop of hair Donovan rearranged to be more down-loEorlh, a Bul has Manning and Slurmer's love for songwriting team, Roger Manning. ' would hove been proud of, lead lot more raw, garoge versions of seventies sounds meant difficulty in We try to bring as much of our show guitarist Eric was a dead ringer for Jellyfish. Which is fine because we're finding a market? "Oh, definitely. Bul I on the road as possible, a bt of David Cossidy. And dnjmmer Andy about thol loo." just figured that if something's catchy lighting, making a bl of low-tech things Slurmer? 'He stands up." Nothing garagey or (if the mood lakes it'll get heard. Whether il's rop or go a long way." He stands up. Like Don Henley, the you) Seatttesqve about these guys' dance o: gtunge or whatever, in my TITY opinion the catchiest, most well-crafted George Harrison guitar solo. "Sebvira, stuff kind of rises to the lop. And even Paiste and Pblo" crosses the Partridge though we don't fit in any of the current Family with the Beach Boys. "He's My trends of confemporaiy music I'd like lo Best Friend' is a Oonovan's ode lo think thai our cafchy melodies and lyrics wanking. But the album's high point is and stuff would be what would get also the greatest song Freddie ^^eTCUIy everybody's attention, bul it's been never wrote: the appropriately titled very slow. #W|S% "Joining A Fan Club". 'We just came from Japan arid ^'^^ "Y^g ly^g^ ^g wanted it to be a it was quite amazing. They're tribute, or a parody maybe, of very much into il up there. classic rock in all of ils glory We had seven sokl oul and all of its hideous humour, shows and Ihe album is seen through Ihe eyes of an selling very well. I don'l odoring kid," says Manning. know, people just seem to "We made it os flashy as understand it. Sweden is possible, lots or big, operolic the same way. We have vocals, sitings coming in our core fans around the and out, oig guitars, it's ver/ US and Europe but I want deliberate ihal way." more people lo hear the record." ^tl crall-cd Jellyfish ore one of the lew N BETWEEN ^•< 3, bands in the world who ,: ) RECORDING write layered, complex ^S^x hind of and louring • which will pop and toke time with ,..i^ \^ include an upcoming support iheir production lo odd o Pises io - with Tears For Fears on their wide range of instiumenls. the ^..; American tour - Manning and The sleeve design for their '^^' Sturmer supplied backup vocals second and blest albumSp/// top.." j^ for IJingo SIOT'S lost solo album. Milk features a studio We were originally supposed lo crammed wilh organs, harps, •"^^Mf ' sing on Kvo songs bul we ended banjos, kettle drums • you name ^^il^'' up singing on six. And we ended up it, they play it. "We love technology writing a song for h'm as well which bul we're big fans of a lot of vintage was a real honour." They also were sounds as well. Orchestral, timeless irviled to a special audience with sounds." Beach Boy Brian Wilson • "We ran The only bond vaguGiy comparable some musical ideas by him. It was very would be Britain's XTC who have brief unfortunately but il v^os quite an steadily'drifted into brilliantly produced, opportunity lo meet one of our heroes, psychadelic pp wilh an intelligent to exchange musical ideas with him." modern Iwist. Manning agrees. With their love of the past il's "I always hovo been [an XTC fan]. But unsurptisic\g that Jellyfish's conlemporar,' there's a couple of groups like SteeV musical heroes ore few. "I think Suede's Don and Fleetwood Mac and v/hole vibe is very cool. The few songs Supertromp where the production was I've heard haven't amazed me -1 think kind of a behind-the-scenes thing. We they're greot more os an entity, as a never wonted the producticn to bond. That's how 1 like lenny Ktovilz. I overshadow the songs, which come first think Lenny's got amazing imager/, 1 and foremost. We ore big fans of the think his band is greal, he has a lot of hidden beauty of ihe arrangement." greot visual asides. I'm not a great fan of his songs bul his records sound real)/ Thejelly'ish sloiy begins in High School interesting. So I think there are people where Manning, a cbssicclly trained who ore really liyinc lo go beyond 235 EDWARD STREET/BRISBANE Ph: 22B 4916 pianist, met Andy Sturmer and fotnried Sitting in front cf a computer ond various bonds. Aftei fours years of making rave music. college in San Francisco, Manning re- NERARY teamed with Sturmer to wrile the songs Kind of depressing eh. that were lo become Jellyfish's first ",t hos stripped all of the human aspeclj album. away." "Andy and I put the demos together and Only one more question: Semper's then we found Jason to pby guitar and obligator/, caicialjane Austen question; my brother lo play bass. We loured thot Whol's your favourite Jane Austen album {Bellybutton ) and then Jason and novel? It's the furthest question from ihe Chris decided they wonted lo nrove on standard rock interview we could come to different things. Chris cojidn't handle up with. Ihe road, which was a shame because he was a big part of the visual "You'll have lo forgive me, I'm fairly personality of the group." illilerote. I have no idea who that is. You can ask me another question if you So Spilt Milk was recorded with new like.' • Duty Free Drinks bass player, Tim; Eric Dover (guitar) Would you like to come lo my birthday • Take Home Souvenirs was drafted in to lour fha.album. And party? "Sure," • Live Music what a great album it is. The blest • Free Check In & Much More! sing!©, 'New Mstake", Improves o^^ Rick Dent Supertramp and tfirows In a (pretend) , HAVE A GOOD FLIGHT! ns^ he Student Union and Uni Health and Counselling Services have organised a week long program of seminars, workshops and forums to provide information and advice on contemporary health issues affecting students. Health Week will introduce students to some of the health resources that are available and assist individuals to access and participate in these. Health Week will also highlight individuals rights when using University community health resources. October ll-lSth sponsored by MBF SEMINARS AND ACTIVITIES Monday, 11 October FOR STUDENTS TROUBLED BY Friday, 15 October EATING PROBLEMS LIVING ON A TIGHT BUDGET GETTING IT DONE Alexia Lennon & Diana Coglll Debbie Lewis 12'1pm Bruce tills 12 to 1pm Seminar Room, Counselling Services 12.1pm Seminar Room, Counselling Services jjaminar Room, Counselling Services CONTRACEPTION SEIMINAR ABORTION RlGHTsffa^,,A«iV Dr Helen Kerr QUEENSLAND WOMEN B^lWdMEN^S^ , 1.2 pm ,—i^'^j. ABORTION CAMPAIGN ^pJiRKSHOP^ Axon Room, Student Unlon^ Complex 2.3pm f^^' ' HEALTH WEEK MARKET DAY Axon Room, Student Unldtt Complex Tuesday, IZi^E^tober Come and see stalls from RELAXATION SESSJ^N Thursday, 14 October Qld major Health Annette ArundeL.:{ '^ flttness,sind diet 12'1pm ,<-^^#'V||: STRESS MANAGEMENT spcci ^•^ The laugliter and sorrows, the Iiighs and the lows: like ill the hourglass of oiir t^ adolescenc ^'i^;'M Boo: So here we are again. How was your holiday, Dee? Wtien I first began ttiis column six monttis ago, I had After last issues nasty little misunderstanding, Readers, Dee a fuck of a lot to say. 1 saw myself in much ttie same decided to take a holiday to sort out her fashion priorities. I way as the crusaders must have seem themselves as trust things went well? they choofed around crusading during the eleventh and twelfth centuries. Yes, I was a torch bearer, but I Dee: Absolutely, Boo. was also a roadside prophet and like Ginsberg, Snyer Boo: Did your stay wilh that nice Doctor Klein help you to and Kerouac I drank from the heady flask of life itself resolve your doubts? and mulled its bittersweet essence in my mouth. Dee: Absolutely, Boo. At ttiat point fiowever, I realised ttiat firstly ttie Beat generation had Boo: By the way, how is Doctor Klein? nothing at all to do with the crusades, secondly that no-one would get Dee: Absolutely, Boo. my torch bearing reference to the year 2000 Olympics and thirdly that Boo: Right. Moving right along, I thought we'd spend this none of these metaphors had anything to do wilh Beverley Hilis 90210. Several drinks later I realised that the Beat generation had issue looking back over the past six months, over that happy nothing at all to do with anything, being largely made up of a bunch of time, when 'Boo and Dee' swept the catwalks of the world self-obsessed middle age, drunken males who wrote on toilet paper. and became a h-ue fashion phenomenon. What do you think In a moment of profound existential abjection I then saw that of of that. Dee? course these cultural gurus were related to my beloved sitcom. Dee: Absolutely, Boo. Well readers, the well is drug. I have no more metaphors. I have no Boo: Of course ! could rattle on about Paris, or Milan, or that more adjectives. So I've decided not drag this courageous farce on week in Beirut doing that piece on combat fashion. And there any longer. Enough about Beverley Hills 90210. let's talk about me.... were so many triumphs; the new collection, knocking Gaultier Gudday! My name is Nigel Pearn and I'm from Cornwellian slock as off his chrome-plated perch; or the night 1 met Naomi any of those who have read my parents' fascinating genealogical Campbell and asked her if she'd written a sequel to The adventure, A/etv Horizons, wilt know. New Horizons is a book that is Beauty Myth (tres amusant); ah, the endless soirees, the glit not generally available to the public but there are five hundred copies tering evenings. I don't know how I'll manage without you. of the bastard in my family home, so if anyone is interested... Actually there are a lot of other books there too. You see, I love to read. Dee. Dee: Absolutely, Boo. My hobbies are world peace, photography, water-sports and reading. Boo: You know, Doctor Klein always used to include a trigger Uy dog is named tslim which is short for Nimbrethal which is Elvish for white and comes from The Lord of The Rings. I told you I loved to in her hypnosis-patients, a word that would break the trace. read. Nim has a skin disorder which makes her ever present desire to Knowing her it's probably something that no one could possi be close to me a little repugnant. To gain credibility ! tell my friends bly ever guess, like 'precipitation' or 'unmoglich' or some that Nim got her skin disorder in Nam. *ti-ss55 thing like that. Louise Nowra once said that he considered all puppeteers perverts Dee: Unmoglich? because they like pulling their hands up doll's bums. This worries me Boo: So, where was I? Ah yes, the endless soirees, the long as 1 am a puppeteer. Actually 1 am a puppeteer wilh absolutely no days shopping in the King's Road and browsing through | prospects - a fairly common condition amongst puppeteers who as a Peter Jones, the long nights chatting to Marianne (Faithful) group are being constantly marginalised. I love being political. I drive a Laser you see. about Marx and how silly the poor ore... Dee: Boo. Whicli brings me to something that Nietzsche once said which was Boo: Dee! You're back with us. And what are you taking out "One no longer loves one's knowledge enough when one has com municated it." This is true. I thought that telling you something of of your purse? myself would conflate the distance between us, would make us What a beautiful silver-plated automatic with mother-of-pearl closer, would make you want lo reach out and touch me. Instead it handle! Heckler ond Koch, isn't it? It really suits your has made my life seem strangely unfulfilled and pointless. Thanks for **2S. that. choker.... Nigel Pearn one person's ranting diatribe for an unfulfilled promise. cVEial years ago Brisbane was brought out before the big commercial push for "Blood Sugar Sex Magik"? THnk of all those 15 year-olds who went to the concert of the dark ages wilh (he introduction of and sang along wilh "Under The Bridge", not knowing that il was aboul injecting drugs and nearly killing yourself S(he ABC's youlh radio station - Triple J. Another case is Sugar. How many people claimed to be old Husker Dil fans when they found out that Bob Mould was Sure, we had had one of the most successful commU' in bolh bands? Witness REM; Jane's Addiction; The Breeders; Nirvana and a million other small lime or long standing nity radio statioiu in the country for years (Triple Z), bands that shoot to prominence, ably assisted by the J's (ailhough JJJ should not be held solely responsible for this, Ihey which until the evil Brazil days had heea student ori do assist in the 'selling out' of these bands). There is nothing wor.« for a big fan of an obscure band, than lo have that ented and run. We wanted more. We wanted the fa band become really successful. All of the thousands of people who claim to have been following them for years, when bled J's (hat out friends and telaltves from southetn you know that you are (he only person brave enough to leave a deposit at Rocking Horse to gel (he album imported... climes had been ejaculaUog over for years. What did Sorry, just got off the irack there for a minute. we gel? Well everyone has their own taste, but as a Worse than this 'selling out' is when they play shit like Guns 'n' Roses. Sorry to fans out there, but if I hear friend said lo me just the other nighl - "It lakes B105 Sweet Child Oh Mine (my spelling) once more, I will hurt someone. This is supposed to be a youlh network, which to make JJJ look any good!" means that Ihey cater for people up to aboul 28, and due to the plethora of teen networks ihey (should) try to avoid So what happened? Where did it all go catering to Ihe young teen market. Unfortunately this does not really happen. They have been glitzing themselves up wrong? Why do we have lo put up with Roy and more, and more, with their constant competitions etc. What I don't understand is Ihal they do not need lo bold a certain HG.forhour after hour on the weekend? We, as tax maricet share so that iheir income from advertising remains the same - ihey don't have advertising. So why do they payers (there must be a few of you oul there), pay for have these silly competitions? If they just play good, new music that does nol fit the mold of ihat played by Ihe other this crap! Slop-rewind-lets have a quick look atthe stations, they would immediately have a huge market share. As it is, I end up turning lo another station, or turning the history. radio off because oflhe crap spoken and played, In i975 2JJ started in Sydney. About ISyears This is nol to say that everything about the station is pathetic. The dream analysis segment, and the questions later, and after converting to FM, il came to Brisbane. for Dr Carl are always good listening while you are in the shower, and the information programs, like rights under ihe At aboul the same time something very strange hap law, and the Aboriginal issues lalkback are usually good, but really you don't tum on (he radiospecificall y (o hear these pened at the station. Seemingly simultaneously Ihe shows do youV network appointed a new manager and a report was The almighty Hack, Horton, says thai his most annoying feature of the slalion are the 'radio personalities'; made aboul the staff al the staliosi. at\er which mosl y'know Helen and .Mikey etc. elc. They add to it's sounding more and more like a commercial station, but don't annoy of the then current DJ's were sacked (Maynard was me as much as the bad music. The thing we agreed on is the abhorrent commercialisation oflhe 'indie culture'. Since one of the very few who avoided the axe), Whal ac Triple J has been in Brisbane, there has been an increased, bul watered down indie scene that has left much to be lually went on will probably never be made fully pub desired. There are more clubs playing 'alternative' and 'dance' music, but 1 have yet to findon e that plays consistently lic (the slalion wouldn't tell me any details when 1 good music for multiple hours. Maybe I'm just getting old, but muchof the music sounds Ihe same. Shit, I am getting ca)led them), bul at the lime there were many bitter old -1 used lo yell al people who said that all of The Smiths songs were the same, bul at least they were alone in the words uttered by the ex-DJ's lo the media. wastelands of independent music (yes I know this is alie, bul il kind of sounds good, doesn't it?). This absoiption oflhe All of tWs is fine. OK, so the station has 'indie' culture may nol be due lo JJJ - after all, tho greal Grange fashion movement was totally inspired by (read stolen l)ccome more and more commercial, but what is ex from) this sub-culture, bul whal the suburban teenagers pay S2-300 for at Myer, you used to be able lo buy for less than actly wrong wilh it? Well they have a play list now, SlOal an op-shop. which is not nearly broad enough lo accommodate Being part oflhe 'indie' culture used to involve a long period of reading English music magazines, findingth e the mi'slcal tastes oflheir listeners (well mine at least). 'allemaUve' record shops, findingclothe s in strange dingy shops, and really findingmusic . This culture has now been They do nol 'go' in any particular musical directions popularised and marketed by capital driven companies, and for this reason il has lost the connection with its own - except for their specials, like the world music seg sensibility In the same manner, JJJ is claiming lo be something which il is nol (but once was?). This may sound like ment - so they end up playing watered down portions an eliUst stance, but when you realise that your musical tastes lie outside of the mainstream, then the personal journey ofall musical directions. Ailhough they still 'break' of discovery is what makes the culture, not just being sold the 'alteraative' image. For those of us who have experi a lot of Australian bands, the bands from overseas enced life before JJJ. you may understand whal JJJ can not accomplish - real culture musl be taken: cannot be given. which Ihey play arc still fairly conservalive in their 'indie / alternative' approach. Fore.xample, how many As a last word, some friends of mine (thanks Kyla and Dan) spotted a car wilh a Triple J sticker beside another teenagers had heard of The Red Hoi CWli Peppers .Slicker which said "Don't blame me -1 voted Liberal". I think that says it al! really, don'l vou? Scott Coooer nmnM ii'7*'V^'.f''if'''f-'^K *!'Mlii. :\. :;g\ s AV;.>»VT'^J¥ ••%•'• S • •'•• :i "•',-.'< ;.v4 ;^ •>^'.- '..I^ 5.^* I <" 7/)6 HuOQ^r'^/l^f'^S^ ir^ <3 jitfle'^irl • priginalt'l approach to The show closed on the 25 Sep, P:^0'/':f pv'j'i^i^Whd finds^ti^dfKeanticipate s Tier • Shakespeare as jt tHay have but there are already plans for The Hunger^ Artist runs fer c)hi®^^'^,'^°f'®''" an ^increasingly been In d seventies Brisbane it is a return season next year to about forty minutes; and has x°f["P'®^ language of gestures, cerfain y one which has fhe give YOU a second chance. been presenfed as ifie second -'^''.^^®"®^°^ '"^^^^n^^ ^^''^ P°^^"^'°' .^^ '"'f^^ '"^^"^'^ °"^ Christina Koch part of a double bill with a °"^"*'°"' ^'^^^ ^i verv lively and emohon info the original fext. variety of Brisbane performance P°"y audience, the Hungry Several reviewers hove corn- groups filling the opening slot ^'^f' ^^jpite his capacity for mented on the problerrjs of the WHAT'S On? over the three week run The T^'"^ "^"^ °'''>' '''T* ^'L ''" ?P°?. ''^ *^^.^^^^°^,d ^!^^°*^^ The Deadly Game night I went fo Kicking fhe Ketrie ^^^T ^ '^^''''^''- m L ^°' ^^''' P^''^.'^'^'^'' pro^ffion- ' performe' d' a simple- . ,=» bu. t effec" ana his impresario (Homboy- went fo see it twice-the hrsf lime Arts Theoire tive piece bosed on fhe theme of antly dressed and exuberantly I was seated on fhe side stairs tillCctoberlS women's empowerment against played by Craig Boil), despite and fhe second in the front rov/. .A scarcy thriller set in a remote a backdrop of rape as a strat desperate offempts to attract Even then 1 had to crone my chalet high in fhe Swiss Alps. egy of warfare. Three female attention fo his lean performer, neck in parts, but the significant Diving for Pearfs performers used low-key chore finds it necessary to deposit him difference between who'r I expe- RQTC oi the Cremorne Theatre ography and intermitient taped with a circus. His efforts at rienced on the two separate from October 7 and live sounds from their audio attracting the public eye include occasions was largely due to the Barbara is a obttling single operators as a backdrop for another wonderfully staged better view the second time .. The original choice of theatre- mother who dreams orimprov- their shared monologue. The scene where the Hunger Artists in-the-round at La Boite v/ould ing herself. Den is a steel mill text ranged from personal is wheeled around in an have been ideal. There were worker who dreams of a brave reflection on relationships to invalid's chair in every increas other factors such as the plot, new world. Their lives ore poetic symbolism and some ingly desperate attempts (sym who for anyone who didn't inti thrown into turmoil when the times humoridus reflection on bolised by ever decreasing cir mately know the story of mill undergoes a major their approach to the less than cles) to lure passers by Macbeth , was fairly hard to fol shakeup. But with the arrival of funny topic of rope in our soci The malevoientiy camp circus low (despite the summary Verqe, a dark mystery from ety, it's uncomplicated presenta master, played magnificently by printed on the programme) ,ond Barbara's past, unexpected tion, humour, and empower Sandro Corelli relegates the due to some problems with humour and hope enetr their ment politics made it a pleasure Hunger Artlit to :q position In: sound, lyrics;weren't always lives. (Apparently). , to watch. audible- _ To the great credit Ir frontvof the imend^erle,.where he ps imirkisinDly yiewecl as an of the cost they rose above Cbsi fon Tirffe After 0 short, interval a^different obslriictipn. In the absurdist con- these disadvantages and put in Lyric Opera world was reve^aied on the cluslpn^fi the story; the Hunger some -strong singing and from 29 Cktolier stage. The Hunger Arfist"resem Artist reveals; jn: his last breiath, dynamic performances Love, Fidelity Deception, bles a silent film as much as'^o that the reason he wa s so;^ cpm- After the first time I was slightly Laughter and some of the most play. The live piano, so expertly mitted fo fdsfinp was that he bewildered , but the second beautiful music ever written. played by Nicole Trocey almost hod never tostea any food that time round, with a clearer Idea seems to oe directing the action, he liked. of what was going on and a Freedom Ride and Musorgsky(?)'s 'Pictures at closer view, I was stunned . to Boite an Exhibition' seems to belie its The play seems to me more on And, yes, the leads were amaz some time in October title and become PjctOre.s OOJP,;- exeriise In style than the presen ing. Much of the audience Draws together fhe events that Movie Screen. The opening tation of any partlcuiorly pro would have been expecting a led to fhe ride for freedom in sequence, where the nunqer found Ideas. It does comment on lot of these two and what they Martin Luther King's Alabama artists is brought on stage in^is the fickleness of fashion and saw was not Andrew McDonell with Charles Perkins bus jour magnificent globe shaped cage public opinion and even on the and Alison St Ledger strutting ney from Sydney into the reveals the" theatrical ity of a • possible misreadings of Art, but their shjff but a torhjred Lady M Australian heartland of roclal nineteenth <:entyry fredklshcw In the end Its value is provided and a malleable, power crazed prejudice. transported to^ an early twentieth by the enchanting interplay of Macbeth clutching at immortal- century film genre^ The costumes pidno, costume and melo ify . I got auife emotional in Too Ctever By Half (by Hairy [5og Fashions) ore drama. "Out damned spot"...These are ACR.O.N.Y.M. wonderful caricatures of two performers whose consis CEMENT BOX Victorian fashion and enhance tently high energy presence 6-23 October the larger-than-life style that the Ke/tf) Ti\i66y seems unable to disappoint. Greed is good? Greed is funny. actors employ, always in thrall to fhe piano. The narrator, who MACBETH tells tlie story of the hiunger A group of young local theatre Artist's fall from popular travel workers and musicians combin ling performer to Circus ing new performers and old sideshow freak, does a superb hands worked together with job, while fitting nicely into the remarkable commitment to silent movie framework (as the revive this show for writers Judy replacement for the text frames Stevens and Clarry Evans, who in between the action.) There first performed the piece at La are some beautifully staged Boite in the 70's. The bond,- scenes, like the one in which the lead by Judy Stevens at the Hungry Artists becomes a mir piano- was solid and immersed ror fo his public, performing in the atmosphere they were duplicate actions to whichever creating (drummer Chris of nis admirers is In front of the Connord the most exceptional cage. This scenario develops example) Benedict O'Leary (Gtumou), Lisa Hickey (Kleopatra), tvlartin Odger into an Intimate encounter (Krutitsky) in TOO CLEVER BY HALF. While not such an incredibly mm^smaM^l^^^^t f ^^^fa^Ma gs*a*isas>iS55B!$SS3 11^^ •'•. •.-:;•,-,*•: :-' •y;-..:;.:;i;<->--;::- with Cowboy There is Mo Such ../.#• .viwwsaiss Thing as a Bad. Giant Earthworm No. 2: r/ze Homogenisatlon ofFonzie Movie"Bob . "; f there is one figure missing from popular television, it is the figure of tfie rebel. / ou Icnow you would be amazed ii (he number of people,who come up lo me Television is such a powerful roedium, and for il to lack a figure who might V in Ihe sired Ihese days and say "tHey! Cowboy "Tlicre Is -No Such Thinj; As loosen the Fomily Ties is a frightening and deeply suspicious phenomenon. T.V. rebels I • A Big Cianl Eantiworm Movie" Bob, how come yoO've never aclually fcviewcd a giani eailti- hove existed in ihe pasi, the 'cooT Cookie of /'T Sunset Strip, the hot-headed Little Joe of wormmovie in your column^ I mean how are we supposed lo know if Ihere arc no bad gianl eartli- Bonanza, but os soon as they began lo show signs of popularity, the 'powers-lhal-be' have worm films if you never lell us aboul all ihe f;oqd oncsf' Well, this month's column is dedicated lo all worked fo bring them over to the 'Olher side', to homogenise ihem and sirip them of iheir ihose people out there who have lalien the lime, shown ihe iniliative, had ihe spirit and ihe guls la rebel status. Look at 'Hot Lips' Houlihan, the sexual misfitof A1'A'5'W, who by the last series come up lo me and lell me what ihey want! I salute you! Yes Ladies and Cenllcmen, ih'is is for all of was definitely 'Margaret' Houlihan, and proKcd arourKl the compound like a bom-again JMIPMMII Christian. Joining her in ihe last series, sons kocks, was Klinger, and other ex-deviant. Even Havi^eyewas toned down, his anti-army stance so terrifying the moral majority of the seven- lies that he was robbed of his Catch-22-esque glow and made more like Albert Schweitzer. DUNE .^ A ' Matt in Melrose Place, who hod the potential of being the 'Other' figure, is reduced lo being a token gay man, and is about as challenging and confronting as Don Burke. (A friend Now thai, since the last edition, you've all gone and seen Blue Velvet 1 can say ihal Dune, based on pointed out ihol the goyest thing Maft's done so far is get bashed.) But perhops the most frank Hcrbt'rt's novel oflhe same is dircclcd by lilue Velvet's David lynch and stars Kyle MacLachJan, glaring and blatont example of a rebel being transformed info Donny Osmond before the Sling, Max von S)'dow, )ose Ferrer, Sian Phillies and.-.. Lois of Cianl Eanhwomisi viewers' eyes is ihal of Aiihur Fonzarelli in Hoppy Days. Viewers, you ore being manipu Yes, this visually stunning film has worms all over the place; Ctfo I love ihem! They lead the best lives lated and you have been robbed, and in cose you weren't aware of it, I'm going to show you ihese worms: They are virtually jmmorlal, hundreds of melfcs long, worshipped-jis gods by the locals how. and basically spend ihe day'cruising around bbncalh ihc dcserls surface and ealing everything ihal When Happy Days began there was a bit player in what was predominontly the adventures moves. Too Cool, To lill you in on tlie slory, which is pretty irrelevant when you consider the worms, of Richie Cunningham called 'the Fonz'. He was only ever seen outside on his bike, complete "the Universe's Mega-rich are all addicted lo this life prolonging narcotic called ihe Spice Melange, with jacket (at first pale blue • a lo Jomes Dean, and later blade leather} and dark sunglosses. ••and this Spice comes from only one place. The desert planet Dune. Whoever controls the Spice Little was known about him, except that he was, without any doubt, 'cool'. He was a rebel controls Ihe universe, therefore, everyone wants lo conUol ihe Spice, therefore Politics, therefore and a sexual dynomo, portrayed Ine images of the biker, the leather-man with its s/m conno War, therefore Kyle MacUrhlan riding lo tbe rescueo n the bi& of, Yes.... A, Giant Earthworml tations, and more obvi ously vras a reflection of Sting geli l A police officer wifh all the understonding ond broadmindedness of Lourie Kovancgh comes Kevin Bacon: we remember the day wo li5t saw him, the plucky young kid in Footloose who had to Milwaukee and decides that Fonzie is a 'thug' vAich was good spotting os his behaviour dancing in his heart and the beat in his soul. In Tremors, jus', like in the Nulri-Grain advert, we watch- was closer to Frankie Avalon by this stage of the show than a young Marlon Brando. It seems , the boy become the maii.liacon plays opposite Fred Ward as a pair of of country handymen Inm Ihe there is nothing Fonzie can do, the law is on Kirk's side, and a showdown is arranged at ' iown of Perteclion, Nevada. They are gelting-sick and lired oflheir boring and often smelly jobs and Arnold's lote one night. But unbeknownst to Arthur, the townsfolk have a plan and arrive 'decide to pack up everything they own, whack il on the back of iheir truck and head oul to '".the city',. dressed in jeans and leather jackets. Their point is that if you run Fonzie out of town there will where they plan to make ll big. . . simply be more where he tame from. Kirk, unable to cope, or even understand (again resem Enter giant womis. These poorly-made yet strangelydisUjrbing things (thirty fool long, weighinglhirty bling Kavanagh) leaves, never to return. The idea is cleverly executed. On the surface, if tons, bigmomh/mpulhs, dineson raw iiesh, usually human, you know the drill) begin chewing up tho appears that me rebelliousness of Fonzie, as symbolised by his clothes, has rubbed off on town and ils inhabitants, slarting wilh the road, this ONLY road leading in and oul of Ihe valley mainstream Milwaukee and mode them rebels unto themselves, the ultimate realisation of subversive behaviour affecting the attitudes of the majorify. But the jocbt remains just that - Michael Cross (ihe culerthan cute Dad from Famiiy Ties) plays a gun nut survivalist in an altogether a symbol, for when Joanie shows signs of enjoying her new look she is discouroged, and enjoyable perfomtance. • Pofsie is sodly still 'a Potsie' despite his 'cool' appearance. What happens is that a powerful weapon of Fonzie's, his wardrobe, is appropriated by Middle America and is completely The ading in is tllm is well above the average for horror/thrillers and it is a true pleasure to watch disempowered. The sight of Fonzie's jacket is never, ever, the some again. Bacon and Ward playing off one another in their, on ihe whole, well wrillcn scenes together. The plot: well the plot slinks. Wo never find out where the womis come from, how they breed, how So what now? Alt seems hopeless and although shows like Married With Children do their Ihey avoided dcHedion for so long, why ihey haven't been seen by anyone else, and the list goes on ' best, they ore hardly damaging fo anyone's moral stance. The program is seen as a parody and on. There ace enough hok, in this one lo drive a fleet of Harieys through, HaHeys with big fat or a caricature and with the svhole show slotted ai 'Other' it becomes completely ineffective, men riding Ihem al that, bul to be frank, Who Really «ives A Damn! There be Womis in ihem there Bul there is a glimmer of hope, a shining light on the television horizon, viewers of the world, hills. and I place all my aspirotions and dreams in her smart mouth and street-wise nature, as she lays trapped in the mid-west hamlet that is Lonford. She is the daughter of Rosanne Connor. So until next lime "Ride High Saddle Pals" and remember... She is Dorlene, And while Fonzie was 'Disney-ed' info Arthur, I pray that DaHene will never become America's Dar-ling. TH€R€ IS NO SUCH THING, SROTH6R5 AND SISTERS flS' r. Benzie fl 8flD GIANT €flflTHLU0RIVlM0VI6! FAG HAG More Please is collecting quite ORE PLEASE Australia with her German hus rightly so, IRolw^it^RodlA rty Humphfie.j a bit of kudos, and band Karl to establish a Lutheran this Is quite possibly-the Ijcherfshjniyiposi- Barry Humphries is best mission near Coonabarabran. greatest Australian autobiogra ^ tion as ^ Irie nd,of known as the creator of Mysterious murders and shifty iKeVgayicpmrnul phy written to date. Even if it Danne Edna Eve rage. -This dealings follow their arrival and riity-and l^espe isn't true. Gudrun soon begins to question is a damn shgme. It's dally cherish iriy; Marcus Salisbury the role that Europeans place friendshipiwith^a obvious from reading his themselves in with number,-; : • of autobiography More respect to the beloved fags, t Please that there's a lot Aboriginal peoples. haveln the past more to Humphries than &V Ginny of the laughed at referr Edna, v/ho seems to edited by Brae Kamilarot people ences tomyselfi have grown out of ali DanieLf comes by tragic as a: "fag hag" proportion since Gough There have been a coincidence to live and have even Whitlam bestowed her lol of comics started on the mission with used the term ^to her husband and "knighthood." For a start, in Australia over the proudly describe years and most have children. As racial there's booze. A lot of nfjy intimacy'with been crap. There tension grows, gay men.;That is until 1 read Robert More Please deals with have been notable Ginny finds herself Rpdl's novel Fs^ Hag. Jo briefly Humphries's period of alco exceptions, like and her family vic describe tills novel would be to say holism, from first "entering Cyclone Comics' The tims of the Myall that it embodfes the hostility and sex the adult world on a forged J a eke rod and The Creek Massacre. In ism of gay male separatism. \ passport' as a student in the Southern Squadron her struggle to deal Fag Haiftells.the stdiy of a .^visted, i950s to his prolonged bout and the Pox Comics with the tragedy she ugly, fat, Vindlctive/lonely wornan who ; of detoxification in the early anthology. discovers love from thwarts her gay; friend's attempts at seventies. He doesn't mention This month has seen within the white cul happiness iy systematically destroy ture. Sir Les Patterson much, how the release of a new ing his;re(atlonishlps with promising ever it .becomes easy to. anthology humour Gudrun, too, finds men. Natalie. Stathls failsjto find rela comic called suspect after reading this love from outside tionships in^tHe,;h^terosexual commu GROOVY GRAVY, produced locally by book that les is a particu her. traditional bounds and nity due priedoifilnantly lo her aes Ponsonby press and edited by Brad matures with an appreciation of thetic unattfactiveness. In a desire to larly nasty piece of self-mock Daniels and it seems to fall in with the Aboriginal way of life. She "be seen" with beautiful people she ery and self-flagellation. the exceptions. GROOVY GRAVY'sdeal s with the tragedy of discover befriends P|terfLeland. She schemes Huriiphrles is: also a talented contributor list is quite small, but ing the truth amid her culture's relentlessly^tp^^increase Peter's painter and a man of many different collaborations between deceit, and works towards both dependency.:pnl|ier and,;ultlmatflly to, /immensely refined sensibility. the six creators produce a variety of her own personal and a wider res make him realise the appeal ofa het-^ It's reaiiy quite a shame that material. olution. erosexua! relationship': with her. The The art is mostly veiy competent and greatest challenge to her plan ismat:^ this has been glossed over in The book is written in the style of W; favour of Edria^ in places quite stunning, although a frontier novel and therefore pro ifested in the form of Lloyd Hood., with compnjmised a little by the reproduc whom Peter falls madly In love. It is More Please presents an vides the powerful insight into the (apparently) honest account of tion process, layoijt ranges from stan Aboriginal response to first settle through Lloyd's ;character that RodI dard tiled panels to Tina Williams full- introduces some rather bizarre the Adventures of Barry ment of traditional lands. While page fluid images in DRIBBLINGS OF as winner of the 1992 David rftetoric about extremist liberalism, Humphries, and wil! go some A CONVOLUTED MIND which direct Unoipon Award for Black the only clink in which being the way toward rexjefining the the flow of the text rather than pan extent to which the fundamental free Australian writing [Sweet Water - general perception of this els. Stolen Land is undoubtedly well dom to bear arms is balanced by the "pleasant person and patriotic deprivation of freedom as its conse The writing is a grab bag of the criti written) it didn't seem to me that quence. Mingled wilh this rhetoric are Australian." There's a lot in cal, the hilarious and the very weird. it extended itself enough to deal suggestions that gay rights cannot be this book. It's fuil of aneo- It's funny stuff, but on the whole it at length with the real issues. In campaigned for by lobbying the gov todes, confessions and events, isn't really humour, it's just plain an attempt to make the novel ernment as no authority should dic and knocks the stuffing out of strange. Whether you like it might readable McLaren loses touch tate others inalienable rights. ; Clive James when it comes to depend on whether cascading non with the ultimate theme and fails Interesting theory, t thought! This tales of parochial suburbia, sequiturs, neosurreal word plays, a to build his characterisation in a strange fascination wilh grindcore and way which would afford the reader political garble serves the plot by Humphries's accounts of life illustrating that Lloyd is far too clever parodic pseudo-ideology reaiiy light a reat insiglit into the persona! in the Australia of Lyons and your candle. consequences of racial brutality. to have his relationship with Peter Menzies are wonderfully evoca undermined by Natalie's bitchy cun i really liked GROOVY GRAVY, i rcconSimilarlyv , in an attempt to provide tive, a leafy IVIelbourne GPS ning. Natalie's tactics reach psychotic mend getting a copy, it's only $1.50 an unbiased perspective McLaren levels when she is shut out of Peter's, j version oi Fatty Finn. He also and it's available from comic stores, tries too hard to integrate the life. She becomes obsessed^t|)| had^5^;^Jot. more fun at Uni Kent and Rocking Horse Records or European reaction to the events regaining Peter's confidence an(J.yQy6;i.,^ thari^^oiJr average uptight the publishers, Ponsonby Press c/- and therefore fails to provide the and fails to stop even at crifpinaj::" ; und^rgrad. During a Melbourne Brad Daniels, 12 Ponsonby St, powerful response to the plot activities to pursue her aim7Her : Uni V Dada performance he and Annertey, 4103. from an Aboriginal perspective. obsession does, however, effect a a colleague pelted the audi Give these folks a chance and pre In short, the novel's ambition weight loss and therefore everyone ence with fruit and raw meat, vent another local effort disappearing results in its reading more like a ends up happy. WHAT CRAP!! while screaming out famine down the River Guano. best seller than as the powerful The only positive thing that this book statistics. The audience, soon Tim Mansfield and moving account of the colli could achieve would be to assure sion of cultures that the book insecure fags that their lack of attrac to join "the logical province of SWEETWATER - could easily have been. tiveness to women is justified. It also bores, the World of Buisness" STOLEN LAND stormed the stage. But maybe there is con selves the contention that there is a Philip McLaren strong correlation between rigtit wing Humphries also recalls the siderable strength in politics and a pursual of gay rights long-lost days of the pre-TV Sweet Water - Stoled the argument that the without the need for political activism Ausualian entertainment indus Land explores the way to peoples' hearts or participation. This book is ugly and try, describing bedraggled, immediate repercus is through popular my opinion is not borne from any sut> boozy viragos who were sions of the white inva Culture. Sweet Water - consclous realisation that this book famous as radio, vamps and sion of Australia. It Stolen Land is defi reflects my own alterior motives for mother-hens, and corrugated traces the trials and nitely good reading and having friendships with gay men. catamites who played children. resolutions of integrat while it isn't swinging Rather it Is borne by the fact that 1 ing two very distinct cul personally recognise the positive He proceeds to tell the story any punches it defi of his expatriated exploits in tures and peoples from nitely deserves credit. implications of an alliance betv/een an Aboriginal, but far the homosexual and straight commu 1960s London, including being Kyla Reid from biased, perspec nity and more importantly the produc tranquilized by Spike Milbgan, tive. tivity of the common bonds that link while using lots of recondite the gay and women's movements. and nacreous words (like The plot revolves Beneath a masquerade of dodgy com recondite and nacreous). around the fives of two women destined to personally deal with edy and misdirected satire, this book Ultimately a picture emerges defies that very bond. the integral implications of settle of an off-key ment. Gudrun Maresch arrives in Kyla Reid genius who has only recently grown up. TimiTyw could be quite danceable, but as they going to emerge as the John Lennon / BABES IN fltbumsi, arrive onjhis CD .they,are nol really, Robert Forster ofjhe^group, and,which „,J.OYLAND^ dancefioor maierial^Ther^ are six tracks;- the Paul McGaftney/iGrant McL'ennaii. } .PotnkiUers' 4 NON-BLONDES here, tqtaf)ing^25 minutes ot" Since then,;Frank Black has releasMhIs ReprisQ'"} Bigger. Better. Faster. music,jTnaklng me wonderTf: solo debiTt, now Kiin Deal is back yi'ith her Well, " for More his a,riiega-EP or a v^iy Imall" former |ide-prbjecL:The Breeders and-it starters, I usu Atlantic Ibuin? To their credit;they- seems that they've J)qth become; George ally, really like Let's face it; we all like a bit javold thi temptation toipro- Harrison. Who'd have guessed? t ' • j, Babes in oi a v/ail now and then. And .-ijjvlde numerous remixes of the Kim Deal lias amply proved herself lobe a Toytand. This Linda Perry, lead vocalisti 5^ same track, which many dance fine songwriter and musician in herown album, however, for 4 Non-Blondes, has one ^^ bands give into, resulting in a right, now that she is no longer sharing isn't quite as whale of a wail. Hers is fhe dash to the CD player to avoid the limelight with the tikes ot Black hard as some of their previous releases. I l(ind of voice that one the pain of yet another version Francis, Tanya Donnelly and ... and ... oh had the disturbing impression that f was acquires by gargling pow-! i the same song. Hov/ever, in God, what's her name? You know, the listening to Transvision Vamp about half dered glass. From a chest tone as deep fhe case of South End, I would woman from Sonic Youlh? Jeez, I just way through Painkillers. There's only six and resonant as the have appreciated a chance to hear know that I'm going to remember her tracks on this CD, but the last one, ocean it goes spiralling what they consider to be a good name three days after we send the paper Fontanellette runs tor nearly 35 minutes. lilce a runaway rocket dance remix of one of these tracks. to the printers. Damn, i hate being caught And rather than being dull, this is possibly into a scream/wail/roar South End is part of Volition with my trivia down. ,., one of its best features. , thai carries more Australia's Second Nature dance Last Splash is one ot.those perfect pop Babes in To^'land still manage to dish out angst than a busload music stable, along with notables albums that quicklygrabs your attention a great sen/ing of hard guitar grunge, and of existentialists. Perry like Boxcar and Itch-E and Scratch- on first listen and drives you through the you should certainly cdrisider adding it mai Bul nevous Chuck has been keeping his wslls secret, so when the truth comes out t]ie"duthQiities and Chuck's mother are all too ready to exercise iheir prejudfces, ond l:^neh€(adiS suspect that Mcleod has been molesting his pupil. The remainder pbys out like Bsajty and the Beast or To Kill A c "fi^fwiih g@lw||esc|if(n3!| boi|)ing^.dnd rtHS^Mrarocter ipiS^^ npSif|yia^-.M6 8rafe It .td^pt^lle to conyifici^'me but} kiiid of tked TJieMon Urilike. Woyne's World, in which the plot wos irreb. .VV/rftciriA'Tpce by tlvesfld.'MobbIm AibcRuty's scnp'- vanf (bit that didn't really matter), Cor^eheods hos a m-m oad stories... ah, here's a good one but I don't J(now If you should write T "Robou t it. V/hen Jimmy (guitar) gets drunk he gets full- on feisty and aggressive and like 'Blah, blah" and Just mouths off any s shlt..." THEUNIVERS 2 COMPETITION Pangaea's Ben Ely (bass/vocals) Is recounting a little bit of the fear and BOOKSHi loathing madness from their recent national tour with the Saby Animals twenty-one support shows plus three headllners In under five weeks. "Anyway, Dave and 31m, In Melbourne, went to this St. Kllda party with The buy a copy of the new Boby Animals and the singer from Mantissa vas there and Pat Cash and all these really big music reps and all these rock stars and stuff. And Jim got CLOUDS CD THUNDERHEAD' really, realty drunk and abused Pat Cash about his guitar playing [laughs]. He goes "Oh I think you're a good tennis player and all but you should do something about you're fucken' guitar playing like put It in the bin or some thing!" I don't know exactly what he said but he mouthed off at him. And ^ then he passed out In the toilet and they all went and took photos of him", laughs Ben. CLOVt^S We're sitting in Ben's Paddington house and the afternoon sun Is bursting forth through tho dense cluster of Chinese Elms In the backyard making them glisten golden. It's a hoi, dry day. even though Its only a few days Into Spring, and Marcello and Jevan (from the Toothfalrles). along with a few friends, are talking and playing guitar downstairs. We've both Just had a smoke. 'Yeah, v/e had a bit of a Jari) in a hotel one night fn Sydney. Just playln' some rhythm stuff and then they came in and I thought they'd Just play commercial stuff, and like, they're good players for their songs but they Just started Jamming out, really good players - no egos at all." Ben's talking with such enthusiasm and zest that you can't but be con sumed by It all and as he rifles off some of the spin-offs from the tour I'm left smIUng. First, they have scored a distribution deal with Mushroom which means that the newly mastered version of Serpent Fire will be available throughout the country - as well as 5000 copies In Oermany. Imago, their record company, have also given thorn a thousand dollars to record a few demos in order to satisfy some Interest from America arm of the label The or the new tour also gave the band the opportunity to foster and consolidate their relationship with the Southern Imago reps, it also gave them a chance to THE WONDER STUFF see the realities of being on the road. "We spent a month and a half in a van, everyday, together • you'd wake up 'ON THE ROPES E.P/ and the drummer's snoring in your ear or the guitarist Is this far pom your Ar-J i>:t r »*m»n! trmrr^ Uti*\ utt tn;i^ ;n»(1 j-aiT ' C *»«' face [laughs]. If you spend that much time with anyone you're going to go fucken* cockoo". says Ben candidly. ^ "wnnnvy^fl^l^. We start to sidetrack, slightly. We both agree that the spectrum of musical talent in Brisbane Is peaking. From the acoustic folk rumblings of One straw to the lightening charged sonlcs of The DreamktUers, there are some very good acts across the field says Sen. I stort raving about the singer from The Pleasures for the sixth Sense and their recent Award winning success. It leads to a direct and fairly personal question. Recently, the one criticism I've heard of the band Is thai they need a singer, what do you think of that comment? "Yeah I've heard that and I sort of think that myself but I like the Idea of keeping It a tight three piece. I'd like to get a singer who fits In with the band really well and we haven't found anyone like that yet. It wouldn't matter what they looked or anything but if they could play sax and sing really well and got on with us. it might change the style of the band like If we got some guy who wore tights and cowboy boots and wore mldrlf tops and mascara and shit, if we got some one Uke that we probably>ouldn't get two people to our gigs," laughs Ben. At the moment the band^are preparing new mateflal before heading into the studio, Ben says thej new material wilt expand on their reggae roots. and win either of the bands fuil bacldist. PADDY DEMPSEY Shock fungus . Paddy Dempsey is a singer/songwrifer who has been haunting the Storey Buy your copy on CD or cassette at: Bridge for a while now, playing o mix of covers dnd originals In amongst the flow of Coopers Ale. Shock Fungus is his first tape, featuring seven THE UNIVERSITY BOOKSHQP UNIVERSITY OF QUEENSLAND . originals ranging from the provocative and political pop of "America" to STAFF RD the melancholy, folk of "Dancing in Fiery Flames". From "America, We're • ST." LUCIA 4067 Turning Into", a shunky up-.beat litany of 'fuck you's' aimed at American PH: 365-2657 culture] imperialism, to the bvers' arigst of "Satellite", Pat paints charac ters and scenarios that ore smeared with a veracity that is both compelling and frightening. Most songs revolve 'on little more than an acoustic guitar and voice, occasionally harmonies and some electric are added for colour, but in this sparse fprmat his songs shine. As with any good songwriter Pat has the ability to get within and under Competition closes Nov. 30th 1993 your skin arid on S/JOC/C Fungus he does just that. Whether ifs wifh o straight-out love song as in "Hob Bella", one of the truly beauHful and delicate melodies of '93, or wifh the humor ^h 'h: n I4i)^ * .isLi^riz/.i^'-^iMioiKl ,111'J olhi'f hislro i.iic iti pushing the extremes. 'I like a lot of Sly and Robbie. Dub-Reggae and, ' ,)Mi,il .ilmostilvn- yeah. Bob Marley. Peter Tosh and Jimmy CUff. It's the reverse pulses, like •: .ii'.;<'M'!c< III id ni li.i^jcl, { u>is->,inl-<.\ ii,i'.;iii'll! •- the reggae pulse Is on tho one and Ihe three and rock's Is on the second H.V.O. with NO corckn^e tVc and the fourth and the accents In Reggae relax people and bring out peaceful emotions and the second and fourth beats bring out the fire All Meals Under $12 and aggression." JOHN MULLEN OPEN lOam till late Seven days a week • --[..'][ • !' .11- iK'-s .111(1 |>,l-lMl-v liU CK if 111-v.; .••I ll), r •i, i, .f. ll .1 • ' ': I':, Kii.l. ' • < !• ,1 •; tics of "Mutation City", P.D. disfuits your equilibrium and reallx mokes yoi| reflect. Even without the Coopers, Pat Dempsey is very good - check this out. JM BIRO The Hula €P "Pineapple Jelly, Pineapple Jelly/ Sounds good on the radio/ Loob good on the telly... " Treading a thin line between Play School and pop, aren'f XXXX & V.B. on TAP you, John, Nick and Trev? But 1 must say, this new Biro tape sounds very • Pots $1.50 ^^^^^"'''^'"^''^'^^''"Se ve7 nice and better than the last one. I really do think there is room for this stuff on mainstream radio. Whot could be a better antidote to Cock- Bottled Wine by the glass $3 Stay and enjoyi Meals cart be ordered'from Rock than a song about what a nice shirt someone is wearing? When PASTA PASTA other fizzpop bands starl releasing stuff this well produced and well tar- WtmtTOtBMUhWlWCMOALWOOfOrMtiarBEBEqWIltPWTMtDOM • 242 HAWKEN DRIVE ST LIfCIA PH 371 1452 getted, then I'll start listening to them. Let them all wither and die! let Biro survive and prosper, prosper, prosper! Gilberts. MirlK-WK f*-*, y^DD [^00(3© i©©[7©G©0^°© [^©^[FG FOCUS ON A TERRIFIC YEAR who voted in the survey, the NEXT YEAR majority believe in ABORTION ON DEMAND. The final results No doubt you all know that the are Yes-117 and No-97. Brendan I'm not Ellie the EVP Student Union Elections were in and the 'Feminists For Life' (read the last week of last term. I'm filling in for a little and one of anti-choice oppressive) you cer- the things 1 have to do is write Besides a bomb threat which 'tainly do not have my sympathy meant that nriain refec had to be this report so if it's a little for the waste of time you put into sketchy.... evacuated Wednesday lunchtime campaigning. The best-side cer at the height of voter turnout, the tainly won this little competition. There's four things I'm going to week went by quickly and Hopefully it won't be too long write here. smoothly (from a non-candidates before the women of Queensland The first one is that Education perspective anyway!!) win the competition they have Area has begun to organise a .'vv-i,.:,; There are lots of people over been forced to enter. I can'l wait rally against student poverty. joyed wilh Ihe final result - yeah for the day a women's right to be Anyone who would like to help to FOCUS for winning!!! This in control of all parts of her life is can call the Education Area on year's Exec is relieved that we upheld - and the State and the 371 1611. Anyone. don't have to quickly finish up all legal system keep their hands off The second one is about HECS the projects we have painstak our bodies. Anyway Brendan, on placement. This is HECS keep your rosaty off my ovaries! ingly started. We are happy to being charged on students who leave the rest of what we hoped HEALTH WEEK are doing work experience out to achieve in the capable hands side of Uni (i.e. therapies and TAKE RESPONSIBILITY of the FOCUS Executive and the stuff) and it may be that the FOR YOUR OWN HEALTH 1994 Council. ANYWAY CON- HECS charged is not legal. The On a lighter note - Health Week GI^ATULATIONS TO FOCUS - Union is currently seeking more is happening between the 11th AND I HOPE YOU ALL HAVE A information from the Uni admin and the 15th of October. The GREAT YEAR!! and DEET and major event of Health Week is the will be contacting ABORTION ON DEIVIAND: YES Market Day to be held in Mayne students. If you want to kno'iv OR NO - HOW DID UQ STU Hall on Wednesday the 13th more about what's happening DENTS VOTE? between 11.00am and 3.00pm. phone Sally, the Education Another result of the elections I'd Heaps of community groups will Organiser, on 371 1611. The like to draw your attention to is be their distributing infomnation to work continues. the results of the sun/ey question: help you be healthy. FrgQ food Number 3, We are looking at an ABORTION ON DEMAND: YES will also be provided at lunch Altemative Handbook for 1994. If OR NO. 1 ran the 'NO' candidate time. you're interested in this one there was a meeting last THURS but but I'd like to publkily put on the Throughout the rest of the week keep an eye out for more. record nrjy beliefs regarding abor seminars and workshops will be Contributfons, help, ideas all wel tion. 1 believe in free safe abortion held on a variety of healih issues come. on demand for all women. 1 do relating to students. not care what reasons women Four. Four, Four. Four. You For any more Information contact have for wanting an abortion - 1 may have heard the latest before the Union. believe it is a women's right to the holidays that tho University have control over their own bod admin (or parts of rt) are thinking ies and their lives. I am proud to of doing away with SWOT-VAC. I announce that of all the people think it's some idea to extend r?^..-^'* ,^S'J''.'i UNION PAGES exam times. There's a petition against this floating around or if mm you want to drop into the Union. If you want to know more about any of these. You can call 371 • •'-•'•*-Ai 1611 and ask for the Education •••• •*»!'.•-.-.^ Area. PHILLIP O'DEA STALLS on Reproductive Technologies for the Keep an eye out for a stall at main last part of Semester refec full of infomriation about the Two. rally, petitions and olher matters, put your name on a petition to stop Don't forget that the the axing of 'swot vac'. Help us out annual magazine pro if you've got heaps of time and are duced by the Women's incredibly enthused. We'll be pro Area. HER-ETICAL, is currently calling for con ducing a few leaflets about the tributions from al! rally and other things. Oh well... R3@/^® K©[o)®[?G, women on campus. We Sacha Blumen are looking for poetry, (Arts Rep and failed articles, short stories, RO®G g) @GQG©[IQ Postmodernist, I actually liate it.) graphics, cartoons or anything else you care OH LAMENT to submit. This maga THE GLORIOUS SUMMER zine is a voice for ALL women students on DAYS OF GLORIOUS WARMTH campus, so it's up to DO MEET THE BRIGHT BREEZE wm you to make sure you BLOWN LIKE THE BEARDS OF are heard.. We need DANDELIONS the contributions by TO SCATTER OVER FURTHER November 1; they can be dropped into Toni FIELDS •mi •: and Pippa's office on SEAN LYNCH the top level of the Student Union complex. 19? The Women's Area has been using the holiday period to catch Congratulations to the up on a backlog of work and newly elected execu attend a training seminar on tive, and especially tb Sexual Harassment. If anyone Carolyn Ride, the 1994 wants any information or advice W.E.O.V.P. Finally', on Sexuai Harassment Issues, don't forget that the please come up to the office and Women's Area is a have a took at the training pack place to read, relax, age we have purchased from the drink coffee or tea and Human Rights Commission. make use of the resources we have We are planning, amongst other things, more self defence work available. shops and an information seminar PIppa Rudd ENCORE FESTIVfiL OF WORLD CINEMfi CLfiSSICS 2 FILMS fs JI^H!?ISZS•K^I r|MFMIl$4ALLFlLMS nwfi nnn $8 CONCESSIONS yi;™ ^d a PIZZA for $6! flNV DflV $10 ADULTS CLUB Yea(^:$20ADl!L]S/JI0AIIOtlieis ncro DQCC $20 STUDENT/CLUB nWf fm $4 STUDENT/CLUB nWrniM S4 STUDENT/CLUB SI.Fft.?S^?i $30 CONCESSIONS VLUh^ $6 CONCESSIONS "Nt MLI^ $5 CONCESSIONS Bny 10 Films! $40 ADULTS Tue&ThS) $3 ADULTS TUE&THU $6 ADULTS UNIVERSITY GROUNDS - ST LUCIA WHEELCHAIR ACCESS PwfMt OS o D€BUSSV pi«hK>« I rwo Of THE MOSr RtQUESriD filMS Of THi 80'j BfTUHNS Jarred to marnj. or OA Imprwilonbt paindn^ A Frenrli film IhM equals MY FATHER'S GLORY & MY 'Jorad to ruU. 'Thar LIFE AS A DOG. A young boy arrives in Ihe ;he Slory 6(came a lofotd. ^ GRAND picturesciue French countryside, where a young cirl inducis nim inlo the big highway of life (1hf^7). FOR SEPT, CHEMINwIVI, The Amazing Irue story of an innocent and a rebel OCT,NOV, WE WITH ANEMONE AND who became a victim of conspiracy & intrigue when Jane she was forced to marry and then rule England for only WILL PRESENT RICHARD BOHRINGER CARY ELWES Dlrrclrd by Jf in Loup IfubrrI 9 days. Perfect cast, costumes & scenery (2.22) HELENA B0HAN-CAR7ER THIS FESTIVAL IENCHANTED MIKE NEWELL's film sel in the 1920's has a sparkling, iS0,\llNATlDFOR IN CINEMA I intelligent script and fine performances. The story of f 1983 A Fl AWARDS three women who rent a villa in Italy. For those who BEST FIU'\. \ ON WED-THU respond lo wit and sensitivity it will appeal.(1hr50) a BEST DIRECTOR. AND CINEMA 2 PAUL COX's masterpiece, is our first true "ART" film A riLM BY( and can only bo appreciated on tho CINEMA screen. PAUL COX OTHER DAYS. A lonely, rich and sexually repressed man caters to his desires in a mansion full of obiecls d'arL (1hr30) hlMIJifi Fnvc DUNniunv VOLKER SCHLONDORFF's (Tin Drum) tilm Irom noncnr DUVBLL I The Story of niDHN OUINN Margaret Alwood's novel is a bizzare fantasy set in the uiUiro, and co\'ers surrogalcsy, censorship, nuclear ' HENRY MILLERS NflTRSHin .TH 1^ nicHnnosoN issues and survival of the planet.(1hr49) /eafirre HENRY MILLER'S controversial slory of his life in Pari< )MA1DS and his affair with Anais Nin in 1932/33. It is a rare fiVNB thing,- a serious film about sexual passion. FRED WARD, UMA THURMAN, R.E. GRAt^T (2hrl6) defeases G.n. Forstor MORE REMARKABLE E.M. FORSTER's classic gay novel has characters who AMANDA DONOHOl THAN 'A ROOM have been honestly recreated in Edwardian England, Please check WITH A VIEW'." when lliere wasa girdle of repression on sex, pleasure HI and desire in (he cbnfines of class structure (2h.') COURIER MAIL IJRAM STROKER'S (Dracula) wrote this bizzare story of pagan mysticism and RusselKWomen in Love) has BRISBANE lUlM HI UU.Wl.s brought it into Ihe modern world with a psychedelic look- and cheerfully absurd comedy. {1hr33) REVIEW Ol Niio! .\' !•!;:(); i TIME -OFF BEST FOREIGN UNGUAGE FIIM GUISEPPE TORNATORE'S loving tribute lo the Vil.'l.'lJrlllll;l'frl:M.'l.tJ-IWJ or phone (ITALIAri/ Subtitled) delights of movicgoing, is full of emotions, laughter, 1992 CANNES FILM FESTIVAL passion, sadness and Toss. The story of a young bey 37) 1879 growing to manhood. (ITALIAN/Subtilled)2hours. TH€ As disributors can only €lliErj|A GIANNI AMELIO'S film has won universal acclaim as it advise us each Monday rivals Kalian classics like BICYCLE THIEVES. The story STOL€NE of a young ooticcman's odycssy with Iwo youlhs and his svaiWilltY of prints (or awakening to Ihe realities and emotions of life (lhrS2) CHILDR6N films opening on Thu. (Baradiso^ (ITALIAN/Subtitled)! MATTHETS BliODEHICK fj, HARVEY HERSTEIN HARVEY FEINSTEIN's Broadway play is brought to Ihc Hubert So|fc>m's| screen, and covers Ihree distinct phases of his life as a drag uucen. A rclalionsliip wilh a lliscxual, a yoviiw TORCH model ond coming lo terms wilh his mothcrdhrS'S) PHONE 3711 611 •^ ULI EDEL has brought lo the screen one of Ihe most Ext.270 12,30-2.30 controversial novels of Ihe Fifties. An apocalyptic vision of life on the New York Waterfront, peopled by sailors. Iransvesliles.and prostitutes. (]hr42] Pi22^ Caffe Wi.MkM%)i\tyh\f1 ALMODOVAR's Classic film wilh CARMEN MAURA A film by and ANTONIO DANDERAS in a lale of 3 womens' PHONE 870 3566 tribulations .A willy wicked comiedy of moral ? '^ Derek itirman Mon-Fri from 5,30 anart hy in an art deco coloured Spain (5uDlilIcd)lhr30 lllLMOSTCOSTKOVLRStAL TueAThu 12-2PM itii liic \.'ii:(' jARMAN's I ilm of the greatest aivi mosl conlroversijl I'ArNTlKOITHt. ITALIAN Satt-Sun from 2,30 painter of tlx? Ilalian Renaissance. Like hispainlings llx> RtNAISSAS'CL (Pizza* from SPM) lilm is brotxlirig, sensual .md pagan and in Jarmaii NvK'lIiS slRlmfXfWiV tradition 2()lli century louclics are introduccd.(lhr3B) ) rARAVACC;io| ORE GUIDE ONLY: CHECK CINEMA/PAPERS FOR ALL OUR OTHER MOVIES SCREENING iniiavr: BOB MARLEY appears on flin celebrating his life and the TMC LtFB St A^USIC music of his Reggae Band. There are 22 .songs culled from OF JK. LECENDt 8 years and several continents, rehersals, Kingston St life, and newscuts letting Marley and his music speak for itself. It makes clear how nis beliefs gave meaning lo his life and his work. Like ABBA this film will have you dancing in tlie aisles. For all those who never saw him live. arley BrisbaneSCHONELh Ftrlusive Season 7-2(1 OCT] M Time Kumsix Bob Jane's money saving coupons for motorists... r— -^ 1 Present this coupon for batteiy special! 12 volt battery to suit: Holden, Comnrtodore, $ Falcon, Nissan, Mitsubishi, Mazda, Toyota. Australian 73 made Exide, Guaranteed Quality Radials. The safer alternative to retreads. Small Cars; 1S5SR 13 To suit most: Astra, Charade CS, CX, TS, Colt, Corolla, Escort, Gemini, Hyundai GL Laser, $ Ma?da323, Meteor, Pulsa'GL Subaru, etc. 45 155SR12 To suit most: Datsun 120Y, Honda Civic, Early Corolla, Escort, Torana, etc lesSRia "o suit rr.ost: Accord, Cam'ra, Charade, Civic, Mazda 626, Galanlpre'89. - _ IVre Care and Safety plan... ;\ really maximises tyre life. Tliis is a booklet which includes a free ^^y £ 5 yO U v,M alignment voucher valid at 5,000 , km, arxl saves/ou $195 on balances, ^ alignments ani rotations over the life ^ of your tyres. Supplied free v/ith the ^ purchase of two or more tyres and a wheel alignment 195 Value for money. Australian Made Steel Radials Small Cars: pies/rs SR 13 To suit most; Astra. Charade CS, CX, TS, Colt, Corolla, Escort, Gemini, Hyundai 51, Laser, Mazda 323, Meteor, Pulsar GL. Subaru, etc. «59 Medium Cars: pi75/75 SR U To suit most: Mazda 626, Corona, Bluebird, 1B0-200B, Tclstar, Sigma CJ onwards, Magna, *69 Family Cars: nasns SR I4 To suit most: Com.modore, Corona CS, $71 Pintara, Cressida. Larger Cars: P195/75SR14 To suit most: Holdc.i, Falcon, Peugeot 505, Volvo 245, Citroen CX, Crown to '86, Starwagon '88 onwards, etc. »74 BOB JANE T-MARTS Browns Plains Cnr Ml UrdesayHvvy Springwood3329PacfcH-.'.7 20E9322 & 'rade L nk W StrathpineCn-GyrrpeRdS Cap3laba46Rea'ard3ayW 245i233 Pas'eyOirve ChermsideC"f6ymp:eRd& Tarings Cr Mosrak 8 Walker Sts 371 79C3 Bandeifl Si 3502899 Service Hours CoorparooCr,rCave'-dis'iRd& 7.45am - 5.15pm Monday to Friday jeliicoe S' 3941133 7.45am - 4.00pm Saturday, Darra Cnr Ipsu.ch & Oarra Station Rd> 375 5455 Enoggera Cnr Samford S Burdekn Sis 354 3222 OPEN UNTIL 4 PM SATURDAY Ipswich Cnr BrMare & Waghorn Sts 8: /1155 Tread patterns iv3;' vary Reddifie Crr Anzac S Oxley Aves 283 2000 Oiiciv aMailatile while \'.(K^\ last People should just not vote,.tl-icy should stop going to work, they should screech this whole flicldng sham to a hait Put the fuckers out of business and start all 0%'er again. Havie the faith to go through the chaos that \^'ill result from doing that, realize that's the only thing to do. Look at viliat happened in Los Angeles. That has to happen on a larger scale without the de- strucdon of people's property or lives. If W-er' e all togedier, we can fuck it up. a good vibes - happening tunes veryjjow vidfixjuvlsion - way cool fun ii Neither is it good enough for Australia to be simply the 'smart oountry'. It must become the party country, ff THE BIG KAHUNA POLICY SPEECH 1993 he hut that hosts is open 7.5 nights a week - most studious uni -dudes! join the tribe, tonight! turbot street ramp city ph 236 2848 vJ•:^>;*i^•:*>:^'<•:^^'>M••;^v.v^«:t^^'^'•^:^;^;^^^^^^ «'«*.*v: