September 19,1983 Page 5 Costello proves he's not just another Elvis

by Tony Scbfani ment. Being associated with new wave gave him a does. His cat and mouse game sometimes tires or tag and an audience, but it also limited him to a falls flat in relation to his other works and some When the lights went out I didn't know what smaller, more discriminating audience. His take- of his overambitious ideas don't always gel. to do it-or-leave-it angry young man image didnt help However, it is safe to say that even his relative If I could fool myself I thought maybe I'd fool matters much either. Elvis has also fallen into the failures are more interesting than a good 90 per- you Velvet Underground's and Bob Dylan's bad cent of most pop and rock around today. For -Elvis Costello habit of alienating audiences with unpredictable example, his Armed Forces album (contains LP's, appearances, et al. "Oliver's Army" and "Peace Love & Understand- If Elvis Costello is not the best songwriter He cannot be pigeonholed, as he is obviously ing") is often criticized for being too synth- around now, he is certainly the most interesting. intelligent enough to avoid stereotyping. He is oriented and slick. In relation to EC's work this No one else is as consistent, witty, perceptive, also very, very prolific—did you know that the may be true, but A Flock Of Seagulls later made gripping, catchy, complex, pop, or unique as this average Elvis Costello LP contains 16 songs? a career out of this stuff, as did the Fixx and "other" Elvis. Unfortunately, his involuted, non- Among other things going for him is that The countless others. FM oriented rock is generally overlooked by the Attractions, his backing band, are one of the "Get Happy," a 20 song soul-influenced album mainstream, with a few curious exceptions; he tightest acts in rock today. Any band that can was criticized for being out of step and ridicu- wrote "Girl's Talk" for Linda Rondstadt, and in firmly grasp Costello's ideas with as much con- lous. Yet Madness and Dexy's Midnight the movie E.T., Eliot's brother walks in to the viction as Steve Nieve, Bruce Thomas and Pete Runners attempt the same sort of thing now. house singing "Accidents Will Happen." (Word Thomas do is more than worthy of the praise This is called "being ahead of your time." It may The Dirge-.Point, counterpoint; has it that Steven Spielberg is a big E.C. fan.) that's been laid upon them. not be hip to like Elvis now, but like the best Elvis had both the fortune and misfortune of With all of this said, let it be known that Elvis work of Dylan, the Beach Boys, The Doors and appearing in the thick of the new wave move- Costello is not 100 percent successful at what he The Kinks this is music that is so far ahead of the point, counterpoint; point.. competition that it needs.a good ten years to be absorbed. Whether you appreciate it or not is by Bryan Denson and Bruce Goldfarb Also in the dictionary is the word pogostick. solely a matter of personal choice, but let's bridge But no mention of pogonotrophy. things by saying that Elvis Costello's newest Ernest Hemingway had one. Abraham Lin- I have just concluded a call to Mr. Goldfarb's album Punch the Clock is good, not great, but coln wore one. Hell, Reggie Jackson sometimes address that went like this: one of the year's best LP's and Elvis' most com- wears one too. Beards, mYriends, look where "Goldfarb, you sonofabitch, you made up the mercial yet. they got them. Hemmingway blew his head off words. There's no such thing as a pogonotrophist The best of Costello's work has been the vio- with a shotgun, Lincoln got his blown off by or pogonotrophy. It's bunk. You made it all up lently aggressive and the fleetingly repressive. On John Wilkes Booth, and Jackson...he's already and now IVe got you by the..." Punch the Clock he tries to combine the two and an Angel. "Hold it. Get out your dictionary and look up doesn't quite deliver the knockout punch This week's discussion of beards will introduce pogonotomy, pogonology, pogonotrophy and expected. The artsy ambitions of Imperial Bed- a new concept to The Dirge, one that will hope- pogonotrophist." room (last year's classic) have been welded fully never be repeated again. I will go one on "Like I said, Goldfarb, you made it up. IVe together with the soulful bang of Get Happy. By one, head to head, mono a mano, whisker to looked it all up and it's nonexistent." all reasoning this should have worked, but the shaved peach, with Bruce Goldfarb, a bearded "As nonexistent as your facial hair?" album comes out more unfocused than coherent. scalawag of little literary note who has no chin at "Look you..." On the other hand, if you have never bought a all. "Sorry, sorry, look, I swear to you if you go to Costello album before this is the one to buy. It is This will be a point-counterpoint discussion catchy the first time around, commercial, as deep betwixt myself and the aforementioned brow- as anything else you may listen to and it contains beater. I will offer Mr. Goldfarb first blows, here, the hit single "Every Day I Write The Book." as he has assembled before me a short note which see Elvis, page 6. I will relate without editing, although already I can see by his grinning face (if you could see it behind the pubic fuzz) that he has taken numer- ous potshots at my unshaven face. I give you Mr. Goldfarb (oh that I could): Is Kinski too kinky for North America? A man without a beard is something less than a man, like a hand without thumbs or bread with- by Jon Lasher in Moon in the Gutter. When the new film was in love with Kinski, who, it seems, reminds him out the crust. shown at the festival in Cannes, it was all but of his sister. Curiously, when she returns his Pogonotrophy has a fine and distinguished There is a wise old saying that one might refer booed off the screen. affection, he shuns her. And on it goes. To make history, as we should all well know. There was to in comparing American and European To bring a European flop to America, where matters worse, Beineix throws in a Freudian sur- Bluebeard, who was a famous, fun-loving pirate. cinema: Never the twain shall meet. Europeans, even a success has little chance of succeeding, realistic dream sequence that is completely out of And there is James Beard, who in spite of the whose fascination with things American creates a seems a risk not worth taking. But perhaps in place and does little to advance the plot. popular books, cooks and eats a damn good constant demand for American film, look at such America, Moon will be able to make it on Diva's Despite Beineix' attempts to murder the film, quiche. film as entertainment, not art. American audien- reputation. it manages to avoid total failure through Depar- If you ask me, I think Denson is suffering from ces, on the other hand, find much European film dieu's acting, Kinski's presence, and a lively per- pilus envy. dull, and prefer fast-moving plots, action sequen- formance from Victoria Abril as Depardieu's He will tell you that having a clean-shaven face ces, and the predictable happy ending. jilted, re—established lover. Though her part is a helps cut down wind resistance, and trims time Here lies the obstacle that keeps Nastassia small one, she pours immense energy into it, and off his quarters. Kinski from attaining the same level of stardom the scenes involving her are the best moments of I think that's bull hockey. If Bryan's face were in America the she enjoys in Europe. The enig- the film, pulling the audience out of its dreamlike a little more insulated he probably wouldn 't get matic Kinski—one moment an enchanting child, trance and reminding them there's a movie up on chapped cheeks in the winter. the next a seductive nymph—may never achieve the screen. It's an established fact that beard-wearers are superstar status on this side of the Atlantic. Her virile, witty, intelligent, and masculine. Clearly American films (Tess, Cat People, and Exposed) The plot...may even Denson's perspective is tainted by sour grapes. achieved various levels of success (including Tess' Have you ever seen him? Oscar nomination for best picture), yet none of No moustache. No sideburns. Not evenpeach- these films gained Kinski widespread recogni- have slipped into reverse. fuzz. Nothing. tion. Perhaps her true test with the American Can you blame him for feeling a little audience will come with Unfaithfully Yours, star- Had Beineix played up the love triangle end of inadequate? ring Nastassia and Dudley Moore, scheduled for the story, the film definitely would have profited. But to ripost those of us who take pride in our release next month. Instead, he spent most of his time trying to whiskers, who derive such profound satisfaction a monster dictionary, one of those library jobs, Her roles thus far have included a woman who express the rough texture of the French water- in our growths, is in my estimation a wrongful you 11 find the words. But if you must know, here occasionally transmogrifies into a black panther front community. He tries to do this with his and misguided attack at pogonotrophists. are the definitions, and I swear they are the and dismembers people, and a student— usual colorful, glittering, eye- pleasing shots. MYriends, I have had to lug from beneath my truth." turned international model — who falls in love The perlexing result simply does not work. lonely writer's desk the Webster Reference Dic- "I'm trusting you, Goldfarb." with a Parisian terrorist and gets him killed. Nastassia's performance is subdued, yet flaw- tionary of The English Language to clear up "Pogonotomy is the act of shaving; pogonol- Such roles, in addition to Richard Avedon's less. Her changeable appearance takes on yet something that may leave you—as it certainly left ogy is..." somewhat unconventional portrait of Nastassia another form. With her hair grown longer and this author—a trifle stumped. , "The study of cigar smoking frogs in comic clad only in a seven- foot long snake, have left dyed darker, her mystery is even more complete. Namely, what the hell is pogonotrophy and strips, isnt it?" much of the American public wary of the Also, the French language unquestionably suits what fn tarnation is a pogonotrophist? "Pogonology is the study of beards, you ninny, German- born actress. This wariness makes her Unfortunately, even the most patient of film- her far better than the English. Yet the language Well, 111 tell you what it is. Nothing. There's and pogonotrophy is the growth of hair." all the more intriguing for those who have goers will have a hard time sitting still through barrier does cause a problem. The subtitles, no such word. There is, where the word would be "I am beginning to believe you." already accepted her. A large part of her enticing Moon in the Gutter. The plot moves slowly, stalls which are always annoying, are in this case a located in the dictionary, the word pogonip, At any rate, whether the words exist or not is magic is her unattainability, the sense of her occasionally, and there are times when ;t may poor translation from the French, so even the which is a "heavy fog, containing ice crystals, that still a mystery because I haven't been to the being some sort of dangerous, forbidden fruit, a even have slipped into reverse. authentic French flavor is lost. forms in the valleys of the Sierra Nevada Moun- library since I started getting those fines in the notion which is enhanced by her latest film, A stevedore, competently played by Gerard Still, the acting is more than adequate, Bei- tains and other parts of the western U.S." mail and then the nasty phone calls from the Moon in the Gutter. Depardieu, is obsessed with avenging his sister, neix' stunning shots of the waterfront are worth I suspect Mr. Goldfarb discovered his word in librarian and well...suffice it to say I believe The picture, a French film with English subti- who was raped and killed in an alley in a seedy the price of admission, and of course the pleasure the middle of one of those fogs, looking for some Bruce. He's never lied to me before. tles, is a new entry from Jean- Jacques Beineix, waterfront area. Curiously, Depardieu never of seeing Nastassia bigger than life makes Moon of those funny mushrooms, or perhaps he was Although this brings up a new point. My who entered the film world last year with Diva. actually searches for the felon, but merely thinks in the Gutter a worthwhile European fling. But if hiding something in the fog, like perhaps his friend Jeff Krumm believes that men who wear Regrettably, Beineix' flair in Diva is not present about it. Consumed with grief and guilt, he falls you're looking for excitement, look elsewhere. chin...or lack of. see Dirge, page 6 Overweight children remarkably re-formed by Obesity Clinic by Bryan Denson the room with the scales wearing a broad smile, exclaiming to her sister "I lost 8 pounds!" Her The weigh-in begins each Thursday at about sister, grinning, nods her approval. 3:30, there on the fifth floor of the University of The clinic was begun seven years ago, the con- Maryland Hospital's Pediatric Continuity cept of Pediatric Endocrinologist Dr. Judith Clinic. The handful of four to 18 year-olds who McLauglin, and is for children under 18 who are comprise the hospital's Obesity Clinic filter in for 50 percent overweight, and who have exogenus their once-a-week weight progress reading given obesity (obesity due to overeating). by Registered Nurse Eleanor Katz, director of "There are mostly teenagers now in the clinic," the program. says Ms. Katz, explaining that adolescence is the Ms. Katz, a soft-spoken woman who seems to time most children become aware of their bodies. be in her early thirties, greets the children— "We have our best luck with four to five year- mostly adolescents—with their charts, and the olds," she says. That is the time when their eating weigh-in begins. habits can most easily be changed. By the time One girl who looks to be about 12 pads out of kids get to their teens, they have already begun good or bad eating habits. "We try to find someone with a stable back- ground during the screening process," says Ms. Katz, explaining that the obese youths are screened over the phone, usually after referral by a family physician. "We try to find someone who lives in one spot," she says. If a patient were to live one weekend with his grandmother, two days with an aunt, and the rest of the week with his mother, it would be difficult to chart or re-chart his diet. Behavior modification is the main tool in fight- ing an overeater, and some families simply have bad eating habits, often encouraging the same. "We simply have a terrible time with grandmoth- ers," explains Katz. To get into the clinic, a child must first be referred by a physician v.ho has given his best Vaudeville revue alive and tapping effort to solve the child's weight problem. kins, who has performed with both Pearl and Theater, located at 806 South Broadway. The parents of the child must then call the Local tapdancer Michael "Toes" Tiranott, Bill Baily; and mime artist Tom Casciero; as Pictured above are (from left to right)The clinic, and are screened over the phone. who performed before a crowd of nearly 300 well as Steve "Captain Saw" Allerton; and Hawk, Toes Tiranoff, Tom Casciero, Fatima The next step is for the child to come in for a students August 31 at the University of Mary- Donald "Barrelhouse Billy" Locklear, a coun- Ball, Barrelhouse Billy, and Captain Saw. three-hour Oral Glucose Tolerance Test, which land, Baltimore campus, will be one of six try blues vocalist and ragtime guitar playdr Tickets ($2.00) are currently available at determines—after the child has ingested a very members of the Chesapeake Vaudeville who will accompany the tapdancers. the Fells Point Coffee Company in the South sweet glucose mixture—how long it takes the Revue to perform in Fells Point during the Highlighting the revue will be Fatima Ball, Broadway Market at Broadway and Ali- patient's blood sugar level to rise and fall. In a Fells Point Festival October 1 and 2. a five foot tall fire dancer who will eat fire, ceanna streets. Performances will be October different test, they measure the child's insulin The Vagabond Players will host the all- Baltimorean cast which includes Tiranoff; dance with it on her body and breata huge 1 and 2, at 1:00,3:00, and 7:00 p.m. For more level. streams of the stuff across the Vagabond information call 522-0612. see Clinic, page 6 master tapdancer Lewis "The Hawk" Haw-

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