An Examination of the Attachment Process from Childhood to Romantic

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An Examination of the Attachment Process from Childhood to Romantic Iowa State University Capstones, Theses and Retrospective Theses and Dissertations Dissertations 2008 An examination of the attachment process from childhood to romantic relationships among young adults raised in long-term and adoptive foster care Lucy Diane Ganem Iowa State University Follow this and additional works at: https://lib.dr.iastate.edu/rtd Part of the Developmental Psychology Commons, Family, Life Course, and Society Commons, and the Social Welfare Commons Recommended Citation Ganem, Lucy Diane, "An examination of the attachment process from childhood to romantic relationships among young adults raised in long-term and adoptive foster care" (2008). Retrospective Theses and Dissertations. 14905. https://lib.dr.iastate.edu/rtd/14905 This Thesis is brought to you for free and open access by the Iowa State University Capstones, Theses and Dissertations at Iowa State University Digital Repository. It has been accepted for inclusion in Retrospective Theses and Dissertations by an authorized administrator of Iowa State University Digital Repository. For more information, please contact [email protected]. An examination of the attachment process from childhood to romantic relationships among young adults raised in long-term and adoptive foster care by Lucy Diane Ganem A thesis submitted to the graduate faculty in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of MASTER OF SCIENCE Major: Sociology Program of Study Committee: Teresa Tsushima, Major Professor Cornelia Flora Marcia Michaels Iowa State University Ames, Iowa 2008 Copyright© Lucy Diane Ganem, 2008. All rights reserved UMI Number: 1450149 UMI Microform 1450149 Copyright 2008 by ProQuest Information and Learning Company. All rights reserved. This microform edition is protected against unauthorized copying under Title 17, United States Code. ProQuest Information and Learning Company 300 North Zeeb Road P.O. Box 1346 Ann Arbor, MI 48106-1346 ii All cultures are concerned with children, not only because children are vulnerable but also because they are a society’s investment in the future. It is our children who will eventually grow up to be in charge of the future. Because humans are social creatures living in complex social groups, we must all take some interest in our culture’s youngest members (Meredith Small, 1999, p. 3). iii TABLE OF CONTENTS ABSTRACT iv INTRODUCTION 1 LITERATURE REVIEW 6 DATA 15 LIMITATIONS 21 METHODS 23 NARRATIVES 26 ANALYSIS 85 RESULTS 87 BIRTH PARENT RELATIONSHIPS 90 FOSTER CARE OR ADOPTIVE CARE RELATIONSHIPS 99 ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS 108 SOCIAL AND ENVIORONMENTAL FACTORS 120 DISCUSSION 135 ACKNOWLDGEMENTS 144 FIGURE 1 146 REFERENCES 147 iv ABSTRACT This is a qualitative study that seeks to examine the foster care experience through the narratives of fifteen participants. This study specifically examines how foster care and family disruptions impact a young adult’s ability to form and establish meaningful and trusting romantic relationships. The data were collected from interviews of young adults raised in long-term foster care and adoptive foster care placements. As I set out to explore the foster care experience, I noted the recurring themes that resonated from interviews with the participants. Participants’ experiences and understandings of attachment are reflected in my findings. Many researchers, such as John Bowlby, have long argued that the attachments that infants form or fail to form with their caregivers have life long implications for future relationships. But attachment researchers have overlooked the institution of foster care and the ways it shapes children’s lives. This study examines lifelong attachment processes and examines the attachment process of young adults raised in foster care and adoptive foster placements. Specifically, this study examines how romantic relationships are viewed, established, and often avoided by young adults raised in foster care. 1 INTRODUCTION The purpose of this study is to examine attachment-based experiences through the lives of fifteen young adults raised in foster-care or adoptive care. Three major life experiences are explored: (1) the child-primary caregiver experience, (2) the foster care experience, and (3) romantic relationships. I am specifically interested in how young adults’ recollections of their relationships with their birth parents and foster parents are related to the quality of attachments formed in their romantic relationships. Using narrative inquiry, I explore individual lives, including participants’ perceptions of their relationships with their birth parents and their foster parents. I also explore major turning points in their lives, such as family transitions from their birth parents’ homes and, in some cases, to and from multiple foster homes. Specifically, I examine how the institutions of foster care and the birth family shape participants’ identities and experiences as these relate to their romantic relationships. I note that in this study most participants recognized their birth mothers as being their primary support and in many cases their only caregiver. However, two participants did recognize their birth fathers as being their primary caregivers. Each narrative clearly conveys how institutional structures play a role in shaping participants’ lives and their views of attachment. Many criticisms have been made by theorists from the symbolic interactionist tradition, who argue that sociology must make central human actors’ involvement in the creation and recreation of the social world through symbolic meaning. (Jary & Jary, 2000). Consequentially, in this project I examine how each participant constructs meaning about attachment and relationship. Even further, I examine how each participant’s experience in the birth-parent relationship has contributed to his or her construction of meaning about relationships and attachment. The sociological significance of 2 this project, then, lies in how the narratives enhance our understanding of the attachment process among young adults who experience family disruptions or are permanently removed from the care of their birth parents and placed in foster care. Additionally, this project deepens our understanding of the importance of the child-caregiver relationship, even when it is disrupted by foster placement. The child–birth parent relationship shapes emerging identities of children, even as they move from one foster care placement to the next. As such, dual foster parent and birth parent relationships impact children’s lives in a number of ways, including attachments with future romantic partners. Each participant shared a unique story. But almost everyone recounted difficulty in forming successful, trusting, and meaningful romantic relationships. Difficulty in forming healthy romantic relationships is a theme this research explores. When I asked one of my participants—a twenty-year-old female who has been married for three years and has two children—why she does not trust her husband, this is what she had to say: Because I just have trust issues; I was taught that really you can’t trust anybody. If you can’t trust the person who gave birth to you then you can’t trust anybody else. I think that’s where that stems from. (Heather) The above comment reflects the ideas of the renowned attachment researcher John Bowlby (1977) that attachment is learned in infancy and childhood. The participant also implies that trust is a prerequisite for attachment. Her response compels us to ask whether the attachment-related socialization that is experienced by children in highly disrupted families may be relearned through relationships with other caregivers, such as foster parents, or with romantic partners. I have chosen to examine romantic relationships because they are the quintessential form of intimacy in life cycles, naturally following parental and peer attachments. According 3 to M. H. Huyck (2001) “As with other intimate relationships, we expect to see at least some evidence of commitment, affection, cognitive intimacy, and mutuality” (p. 9). These relationships may evolve into lifetime commitments. I hope to answer the following question: When children’s relationships with their parents are disrupted by foster care, how do these experiences affect their subsequent attachment-related experiences in romantic relationships? Support for considering either birth mothers or fathers as primary caregivers is found in Hazan and Shaver, who state that, Multiple attachments are hypothesized to be hierarchically arranged. At the top of this hierarchy is usually the infant’s mother. There is nothing in attachment theory requiring that mother be the primary attachment figure. Infants form primary attachments to the person who most consistently care and responds to their distress signals (1994, p. 69). In this study, I note that most participants recognized their birth mothers as being the primary caregivers and in many cases their only caregiver. Therefore, I use the term birth mother and birth parent interchangeably to reflect the experiences of my participants. However, two participants did recognize their birth fathers as being their primary caregivers. The strength of the research resonates from the voices of the participants as they share their experiences. Susan Kools offers a sociological perspective on the study of foster care when she says “Very few researchers have interviewed children in foster care to explore their thoughts and feelings about their status as foster children or their placement experiences” (1997, p.
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