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WEEKLY SCHEDULE SHABBAT SCHEDULE Avot Ubanim starts BH This Mosae Mincha 5:15pm Shabbat at 7:30pm SUNDAY

Shir Hashir im: 5:35pm We split up the Teenager program for Shaharit: 7:30am Candle Lighting: 5:13pm Minha 5:15pm Daf Yomi 8:00am older & younger Teenagers. Looking Followed by Arvit & Shaharit: 8:30am forward to seeing everyone there! Teenager Program

Youth Minyan: 9:00am We started BH the Thursday night Shiur Zeman Keriat Shema 8:47am MONDAY TO FRIDAY 2nd Zeman Keriat Shema 9:22am on Avne Shoham Shiur 6:10am Shiur: 4:10pm The Wednesday Night Shiur has been a Minha: 4:50pm Shaharit 6:30am huge Success! Everyone Welcome! Hodu Approx: 6:45am Followed by Seudat Shelishit & Arvit Save the Date: Sunday December 2nd Minha 5:15pm Shabbat Ends: 6:13pm 2018 our Annual Hanuka BBQ Event in Followed By Arbit Rabbenu Tam 6:43pm Greynold’s Park. Flyer on Last page! & Shiurim in English & Spanish. Avot Ubanim 7:30pm

We would like to remind our Kahal Kadosh to please Donate wholeheartedly towards our Beautiful Kehila. Anyone interested in donating for any occasion, Avot Ubanim $120, Kiddush $350, Seudat Shelishit $275, Weekly Bulletin $150, Weekly Daf Yomi $180, Daf Yomi Masechet $2500, Yearly Daf Yomi $5000, Weekly Breakfast $150, Weekly Learning $500, Monthly Rent $3500, & Monthly Learning $2000, Please contact the Rabbi. Thanking you in advance for your generous support. Tizke Lemitzvot!

בס''ד Refuah Shelema List Men Women

• Yosef Zvi Ben Sara Yosefia, • Isaac Ben Mesoda, • Simja Bat Esther, • Sara Ledicia Bat Mesoda, • Aviv Ben Luba Miriam, • Haim Ben Marcelle, • Mesoda Bat Esther, • Alegria Simha Bat Esther, • Mordechai Ben Brucha • Yizhak Ben Simja • Rachel Bat Sarah, • Naomie Bat Rarel Adda, Malka Shmalo, • Reuben Ben Eta, • Evelyn Bat Solita, • Malka Bat Joyce Simja, • Yizhak Abraham Ben Sheli, • Michael Ben Aliza, • Nina Bat Rachel, • Sivan Simha Bat Yehudit, • Yosef Yizhak Ben Sara Hana, • Eliel Moshe Ben • Gitel Rina Bat Yael, • Nikita Nechama Shimona • Yehudah Leon Ben Mesoda, Sarah • Miriam Bat Sofy, Bat Hava, • Mordechai Ben Miriam, • Rahma Bat Simha • Natalie Rachel Bat Nancy, • Meir Raymond Ben Mathilde • Esther Bat Fortuna • Abigael Haya Bat Esther • Salomon Benarroch Ben Alia • Malka Bat Dina • Madelaine Bat Esther • Mordechai Ben Mercedes • Camouna Bat Fortuna • Nurit Jacqueline Bat Rahel

Torah Teasers (AISH)

1. After Yaakov has a dream he takes a neder, a vow (Genesis 28:20). Where else in the Torah is an actual neder taken (not a shvuah)? 2. Which of the sons of Yaakov, whose birth is recorded in this parsha, is not named by a mother? 3. For which child born to Leah is there no reason given for the name? 4. In this parsha, Rachel steals the terafim (idols) from her father Lavan. Where else in Tanach does another woman handle terafim? 5. In this parsha, in what context are the four directions, north, south, east and west mentioned? Where else in the book of Genesis are the four directions mentioned? 6. Aside from the Matriarchs, which two other women in Tanach are described as "barren" (akara)? 7. Where are flowers mentioned in this parsha? 8. Where is ice referred to in this parsha? 9. Aside from the seven years that Yaakov worked for Rachel and Leah, where else in this parsha is the number seven mentioned? 10. What item, mentioned in this parsha, is the tallest thing described in the entire Torah?

Answers

1) In Numbers 21:2, the Jews vow to consecrate all of the spoils of war. 2) In naming all the sons, the verse states "And she called." Only with Levi does it state "he called his name Levi," implying that he was not named by his mother (Genesis 29:34). 3) The Torah does not state any reason for the name of Leah's daughter, Dina (Genesis 30:21). 4) Michal placed terafim in the bed of David to help him escape from her father, Shaul (1-Shmuel 19:13). 5) In this parsha, Hashem promises Avraham that his children will spread out in all four directions of the earth (Genesis 28:14). In Genesis 13:14, Hashem tells Avraham to look in all four directions, since his children would inherit the entire land - i.e.

everywhere that Avraham looked.

6) The mother of Shimshon is called akara, a barren woman (Judges 13:2). Chana, the mother of Shmuel, refers to herself as

akara (1-Shmuel 2:5).

7) Reuven collects duda'im for his mother which, according to some commentators, is a type of flower (Genesis 30:14, with Rashi).

8) Yaakov describes his devotion to Lavan by saying that by day heat consumed him and by night ice consumed him (Genesis

31:40).

9) After Yaakov and family run away, Lavan catches up with them after seven days (Genesis 31:23).

10) The ladder in Yaakov's dream stands on the ground and reaches to the heavens (Genesis 28:12).

If anyone would like to contact the Rabbi, please feel free

to call or text 786-879-4951, or email [email protected].

בס''ד Community Announcements

(It is YOUR Community, make the most of it!)

Miscellaneous Announcements:

• This Week’s Congregational Kiddush is still available for Sponsorship!

• The Kiddush Club Initiative. Anyone interested donating a Kiddush Please kindly contact the Rabbi. Tizke

Lemizvot!

• This W eek’s Congregational Seudat Shelishit has been Kindly Sponsored by The Benoudiz Family in

th memory of their Dear Silvia Bat Ruby z”l the 11 of Kislev. Tihye Nishmata Tzerura Bitzror Hahayim Amen.

• This Week’s Breakfast is still available for Sponsorship!

Anyone interested in sponsoring Breakfast for this week or on any day please contact the Rabbi.

• This Week’s Daf Yomi has been Kindly Sponsored by Mr. & Mrs. Abraham Becker in memory of his Dear th Mother Dina Bat Adel z”l the 13 of Kislev. Tihye Nishmata tzerura Bitzror hahayim Amen.

• If anyone is interested in creating a weekly class in your house or an individual class with the Rabbi, please do not hesitate to

contact the Rabbi.

• We are trying to update our Congregant’s contact information. We would like to start sending texts about different Events and

Shiurim. We would also like to start emailing the weekly bulletin. We would like to start a list of Nahalot/Azkarot/Yahrzeits.

We would also like to make a Refuah Shelema list. Please send your contact information to the Rabbi at [email protected]

• Please feel free to contact any of the board members either in person, or via email with suggestions or comments. Our email

addresses are: board member’s first name @oroziel.com

Important Message!!!

Eruv Update: Surfside: The Eruv in Surfside now includes the walking paths along the beach. Pushing strollers and carrying is

permitted on the paths, but not beyond the path or onto the beach.

Bal Harbour: The Eruv in Bal Harbour included the inner (western) walking path only. The pier at Haulover Cut is not included.

• Due to the recent reorganization of seats in the Bet Hakenesset, We are happy to announce the NEW possibility of purchasing seats

in the Bet Hakenesset. For more information, please contact the Board.

• Before hanging up anything anywhere in the Bet Hakenesset, please seek authorization from the Rabbi. This includes flyers etc.

• Please be advised that prior to bringing any food or drinks for any occasion, you must first seek the authorization from the Rabbi.

Special Announcements

• We are pleased to announce that Ness 26 is part of the Amazon Charity Program, which would allow our community to

collect 0.5% of all the orders made by any of you on Amazon.com. In order to register you need to log on

smile.amazon.com and select Ness 26, Inc as the Charitable Organization you want to support, and from then shop on

smile.amazon.com instead of www.amazon.com. It won’t cost anything more, and is an easy way to contribute to our budget needs.

• Anyone wishing to receive the Daily Halacha by the Rabbi please send a whatsapp message to Simon Chocron 786-351- 1573

Community Calendar:

• The program for Teenaged Boys ages 13-18 Started again with Great Succes with Shiur by the Rabbi & Supper on Sunday Evenings after Arvit at around at 7:10 pm With Supper. New Participants Welcome! Anyone

wishing to sponsor this Shiur Please contact the Rabbi. Tizke Lemitzvot! • We have started the Mishmar Program Every other Thursday evening at 8:00 pm with Chulent, Beer, &

Snacks. Everyone is welcome!

Avot Ubanim: This Mosae Shabbat at 7:30pm

Youth Minyan

• We are proud to announce the inauguration of our YOUTH/TEEN MINYAN geared to train and teach our future generations on the different tefillot and parashiot.

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We would like to Whole Heartedly Thank our Dear Friends, Mr. & Mrs. Isaac Benmergui for generously Donating the TORAH LEARNING of Kislev 5779 May the Light & Miracles of this Month accompany & Enlighten our Community Amen. We truly appreciate it. In this merit, may Hashem Bless you & your wonderful family with all the Berachot of the Torah Amen.

Birthdays Happy Anniversary To

Happy Birthday To Nahalot • Lou Bsiri – Sun. Nov. 18th, • Gabriel Samuel Becker Ben David z”l the 10th of Kislev • Yankel Majluf Bsiri – Sun. Nov. 18th, (Uncle of Mr. Laurent Becker) • Mr. David Cohen – Shabbat Nov. 24th, • Silvia Bat Ruby Benoudiz z”l the 11th of Kislev • Moshe Elmaleh – Shabbat Nov. 24th, th (Mother of Mr. Michel Benoudiz) • Yosef Avraham Nahon – Mon. Nov. 26 , th th • Hananiah Bouhadana Bar Mazaltov z”l the 11 of • Shana Cohen – Tue. Nov. 27 , Kislev (Brother of Mr. Isaie Bouhadana) th • Eitan Perez – Thurs. Nov. 29 , • Dina Becker Bat Adel z”l the 13th of Kislev st • Isaac Hooge – Fri. Dec. 1 , (Grandmother of Mr. Laurent Becker) th • Orit Benhayoun – Sun. Dec. 3 , • Mrs. Dayana Benmergui – Tue. Dec. 5th, Next Shabbat: • Nava Taieb – Thurs. Dec. 7th, • Yosef Berdugo Bar Flora z”l the 21st of Kislev • Mrs. Jessica Benmergui – Fri. Dec. 8th, (Brother of Mrs. Camila Benmergui & Mrs. Fortuna • Isaac Maya – Sun. Dec. 10th, Mamane.) • Mr. Laurent Becker – Mon. Dec. 11th, • Orly Benhayoun – Tue. Dec. 12th,

• Mrs. Raquel Benarroch – Wed. Dec. 13th,

בס''ד Community Shiurim

Weekday mornings:

• 6:10AM to 6:45AM: Laws of Nidah. New participants welcome!

• 7:30AM Shiur on Hok Leyisrael with Breakfast! Everyone Is Welcome to Join. • 7:45AM to 8:30AM: Daf Yomi Masechet Menahot. NEW DAF YOMI MASECHET! New participants are welcome! It is a great time to start learning the Daf and join thousands of Jews across the world in this incredible project.

• 9:00 AM to 10:00 AM: Mishna Berura Dirshu Cycle! New participants welcome!

Weekday afternoons:

• Before Minha o Monday through Thursday: Shiurim in Spanish on assorted topics.

• After Arvit: o Mondays & Wednesdays: Hoshen Mishpat – Business Halacha o Every Thursday evening after Arvit Hilchot Nida in Depth for Men. o Tuesday Assorted Topics

In Recess for the Summer o Monday & Tuesday at 7:00pm Masechet Berachot in French o Every other Monday evening at 8:30pm Shalom Bayit Class to Women. o Every other Tuesday evening at 8:30pm Shalom Bayit Classes to Men.

• SHIUR for Ladies! The Rabbi’s Shiur on Halachot of Kashrut NEW SERIES ON Hilchot Basar Vechalav, (Laws pertaining to Meat & Milk) to Ladies, in the Bet Hakenesset, every Tuesday afternoon at 2:05 pm. New Participants are always Welcome! In Recess

Shabbat:

• Shabbat night before Arvit: Short lecture on the Parasha of the week. • Shabbat Morning: Lecture on the Parashah of the week. • Shabbat Morning – Daf Yomi at 8:00am. • Shabbat Afternoon – Shiur at 4:20pm • Spanish Shiur – with Simon Chocron One hour before Minha • Seudat Shelishit: Short lecture on the Parasha of the week.

בס''ד WEEKLY INSPIRATION This, perhaps, is the meaning of Yaakob’s dream of the ladder. He dreamt of angels Yaakob’s Dream ascending and descending the ladder so that (Rabbi Eli Mansour Daily Halacha) he would be shown the proper approach to materialism. The ladder – money – has value In Parashat Vayeseh we read about the only if it has “angels,” if it is used for, and prophetic dream that Yaakob Abinu dreamt channeled towards, lofty purposes. A as he left Eretz Yisrael and made his way to person’s “ladder,” his pursuit of wealth, can Haran, where he would live and work for his extend all the way to the heavens, have great uncle, Laban. In this famous dream, Yaakob spiritual significance, if he uses that wealth saw a ladder extending from the ground to properly, supporting charitable causes, the heavens, with angels climbing up and including the study of Torah. down the ladder. Indeed, when Yaakob awakens, he Why would Yaakob dream of a ladder? immediately makes a pledge to donate a Righteous people generally dream about significant percentage of his earnings to G-d matters involving the Torah they are learning. (28:22). He understood the message being Stories are told of great scholars who conveyed through his vision, and thus encountered a certain question or difficulty committed himself to use his earnings for during their study, and that night, while they holy purposes. slept, they were shown the answer in a dream. Why would Yaakob, who had been May we all succeed in having our “ladder” learning Torah diligently for some sixty years, extend to the “heavens,” by ensuring to use suddenly dream of a ladder? our material blessings the right way and for the purpose for which we have received The image of the ladder becomes especially them. difficult to understand in light of the comment of the Ba’al Ha’turim (Rabbenu Yaakob Ben Asher, 1269-1343) regarding Yaakob’s dream. The Ba’al Ha’turim observes that the word “Sulam” (“ladder”) has the same Ends and Means Gematria (numerical value) as the word (Rabbi Mansour) “Mamon” (136). In other words, Yaakob We read in Parashat Vayeseh of Yaakob’s dreamt about money. Why would Yaakob famous dream, in which G-d appeared to him have such a dream? as he made his way to Haran, promising that Yaakob was now going to live with his uncle, he would care for him, bring him back to Laban, where he would work and become Eretz Yisrael, and produce a great nation wealthy. After devoting his life until this point from his offspring. Upon awakening, Yaakob to Torah learning, the time had come for exclaimed, “Indeed, there is G-d in this place, Yaakob to work and earn money. The yet I did not know!” (28:16). Rashi explains purpose of this transition was to lay the that Yaakov would never have slept at that foundation for Am Yisrael, the eternal nation spot if he had known what a sacred place it which he would be producing. Am Yisrael was. He went to sleep at that place along the would need different groups of people – road without thinking there was anything those who devote themselves to Torah study, special about that particular location. But then and those who work to support them. It was he had a dream of a ladder extending from necessary for Yaakov to combine both his head to the heavens, and G-d spoke to pursuits – diligent Torah study, and hard work him. It was now clear to Yaakob that this to earn a living – in order that his place was special and unique, as he descendants, the Jewish Nation, would excel proceeds to say, “This is only the House of in both areas. G-d; this is the gate to the heavens.” Yaakob

בס''ד thus regretted sleeping there, as it is Unfortunately, many of us are too flippant inappropriate to sleep at such a sacred spot. when it comes to Halachic technicalities, and prepared to compromise Halachic standards We have much to learn from Yaakob’s for the sake of important goals. For example, response to his dream. From his perspective, there are those who, for the sake of helping it would have been preferable to forego on their children find marriage partners, this extraordinary experience, on beholding a compromise modesty standards by running prophetic vision, in order to avoid violating inappropriate social events. Yaakob Abinu’s one Halachic detail. Yaakob did not feel it reaction to his dream should remind us of the was worth neglecting a Halachic technicality paramount importance of Halachic details. to experience this vision; he was committed We cannot simply dismiss Halachic to abiding by each and every Halachic restrictions because we are pursuing noble nuance even if this meant forfeiting and worthwhile goals. Our job is to observe something as significant as a prophetic Hashem’s laws, and if this observance message from G-d! As far as he was hampers our ability to achieve certain concerned, the ends do not justify the means important goals, we must trust that He will – even if the “end” is prophecy and the find a way for those goals to be achieved “means” involve the violation of a “minor” without the need for illegitimate Halachic Halachic technicality. compromises.

A Respected Master of In his second comment (at the level of Medrashic interpretation), Rashi says that Deception Yaakov was saying, “If he comes for deceit, I (Rabbi Frand from Torah.org) am his brother in deceit; but if he is a decent person, I am also the son of Rivka, his decent Analyzing Yaakov’s Claim That He Was sister.” In other words, apparently Yaakov Lavan’s “Brother” was telling Rachel that he was prepared to go The pesukim in this week’s parsha say, “And tit for tat, punch for punch, toe to toe against it was, when Yaakov saw Rachel, daughter of anything her father Lavan was prepared to Lavan, his mother’s brother, and the flock of throw at him. Lavan, his mother’s brother, Yaakov came This appears to be a very strange comment forward and rolled the stone from upon the by Rashi. Baruch Hashem, I have the mouth of the well and watered the sheep of privilege of teaching young men who are in Lavan, his mother’s brother. Then Yaakov the stage in life when they are seeking kissed Rachel; and he raised his voice and appropriate marriage partners. Many times, wept. Yaakov told Rachel that he was her a young man who is beginning to date comes father’s brother, and that he was Rivka’s son; to me for advice on how to conduct himself then she ran and told her father.” [Bereshit on a first date. 29:10-12]. The first thing I might tell such young men is Rashi comments on the implication of the not to be embarrassed to say, “I need to use message that “he was her father’s brother” the bathroom.” After that, I might suggest (when in fact Yaakov was Lavan’s nephew, what to do and what to discuss. I never ever not his brother). In his first comment (at the tell a young man, “On the first date, do not level of simple interpretation), Rashi says that ever say to the girl ‘your father is a swindler the term “brother” merely means relative, as and I can match him in deceitfulness.'” in the expression “we are men who are brothers” [Bereshit 13:8] (which Avraham This comment of Rashi is amazing. Yaakov said to Lot, even though there, too, Lot was is meeting Rachel for the first time. He has Avraham’s nephew). barely had time to say, “Shalom Aleichem”

בס''ד and the first thing that comes out of his mouth are not onto their methods of deception and (according to the Medrashic interpretation will continue to try to fool them. given by Rashi) is, “I am as big a swindler as The Gemara then asks what the bottom line your father is!” What is the meaning behind was: Did Rabbi Yochanan reveal the halacha this inexplicable comment? or did he not reveal it? The Gemara The other problem with this statement is that concludes that he did reveal it, based on the if we read the ongoing story, we see how following pasuk: “…the ways of Hashem are Lavan actually swindled Yaakov repeatedly. straight; the righteous will walk in them, and Yaakov, in fact, complains later to his wives the sinner will stumble over them.” [Hoshea that Lavan had switched his salary ten times 14:10]. This is the nature of Torah. Torah (according to the Medrash it was a lot more can be a potion of life, or it can be a poison of than ten times), trying to undercut his death. Torah knowledge can be used for advantage each time. The whole time, righteous purposes, or it can be used for evil Yaakov never reacted to Lavan’s deception. purposes. The righteous use their Torah What happened to his bravado that “I can go knowledge for righteousness, and the wicked toe to toe with your father in deception?” use it for evil. Yaakov seems to take Lavan’s abuse lying The Tolner Rebbe notes that Rabbi down. If I were Yaakov, I would have walked Yochanan was hesitant to remain silent, lest away from Lavan the first time he cheated the thieves think that Torah scholars are me. Yaakov stayed in this abusive naïve and unaware of the tricks of the trade environment for twenty years, without ever of the wicked. The Tolner Rebbe points out a pulling a fast one on his father-in-law in universal human character trait: When I meet retribution for all of Lavan’s trickery. On the another person, the thing that will impress me contrary, he was an extremely loyal and most about him is if I think he understands extremely dedicated employee throughout! my business well. If I am in real estate or Yaakov acted throughout like the “Tam” he some other business, yes, I can have respect was — a naïve Yeshiva bachur who was for the Rav, or the Rosh Yeshiva, or the repeatedly manipulated by his uncle/father-in- Rebbe. But if I go into that person and see law. Yaakov’s statement to Rachel that “I am that he knows real estate just as well as I do, your father’s brother in trickery” seems to be then I have tremendous extra respect and nothing more than a bluff. derech eretz for him. I heard an amazing interpretation from the I am greatly impressed when I see someone current Tolner Rebbe of Jerusalem, based on else who has expertise as great as my own a Gemara [Baba Batra 89b] that discusses — or perhaps even greater — in a field that I the prohibition of making measuring utensils understand well. If a doctor goes into a Rav in ways which could lead to deception. The with a medical shaylah, and he sees that the Gemara elucidates; if you make it this way, Rav knows medicine as well as he does, he the seller can cheat the buyer, if you make it is very impressed with that Rav. this other way, the buyer can cheat the seller. Rabbi Yochanon ben Zakkai was afraid that After an extensive technical discussion about the swindlers would have no connection the matter, the Gemara states: “Rabbi whatsoever with the Rabbanim. They would Yochanan Ben Zakkai says, concerning all of have total contempt for Rabbis who spend the above, ‘Woe to me if I reveal the halacha, their entire time sitting in the Bet Medrash and woe to me if I don’t reveal the halacha’.” bent over pages of the Talmud. Rabbi The Gemara explains Rabbi Yochanan’s Yochanon ben Zakkai said, “I want to show dilemma. If he reveals the details (of what the robbers that I know how to swindle as should not be done because it could lead to well as they do. That will impress them. cheating) it will benefit the thieves (who may Then they will respect me. We never know. learn new ways to cheat); and if he does not Maybe the swindler will be lost, but if he has reveal it, the thieves will think that the Rabbis derech eretz for the wisdom of Rabbanim,

בס''ד maybe it will have a subtle positive impact on Once someone gets into the practice, it his children, and they will come back. becomes second nature to him. It is a Rabbi Yochanon’s message was, “I want to slippery slope. Once someone begins to have a connection with every type of Jew — descend it, it is very hard to stop. Yaakov even a thief, even a robber!” The fact that I merely stated that he knew the profession. daven a long Shmoneh Esre, or that I know He never intended to use it. However, Lavan every Tosafot in Shas will not overly impress could not stop himself. He was a compulsive a thief. This is not “currency” with which swindler who could not act otherwise. thieves will be overawed. What is “currency” The Sefarim state that each of the Avos had by the thieves? It is when I know the tools of his own attribute. Avraham’s attribute was their trade. Chessed [Kindness]; Yitzchak possessed the What does this teaching in Baba Batra have attribute of Din [Judgment]; and Yaakov’s to do with our parsha? Rav Chaim Vital attribute was Emes [Truth]. If we review the writes in the Sefer haGilgulim that Rav Torah portions of the recent weeks, we notice Yochanon ben Zakkai was a “Gilgul” that Hashem tested each of the patriarchs in (transmigrated soul) of Yaakov Avinu. With the area of their special attribute. They were this bit of (mystical) insight, we can better tested in their area of spiritual expertise, and understand the comment of Rashi regarding they each passed their test, thereby taking Yaakov’s boast to Rachel. their mastery of this spiritual attribute to an even higher level. Yaakov meets Rachel for the first time and tells her, “I am your father’s brother in Avraham was the master of Chessed. He had trickery.” This is not to say, “I intend to to be prepared to slaughter his son. The swindle him.” Yaakov never swindled Lavan. Gemara in Shabbat says that Hashem Yaakov was not the type to swindle. threatened to wipe out Klal Yisrael, and it was However, Yaakov was telling Rachel, “I want Yitzchak who stepped forward and made a you to know that your father is going to deal with G-d and argued for compassion respect me. He is not going to respect me towards Israel. Avraham and Yaakov were because I learned in the Yeshiva of Shem silent here; Yitzchak, in an out-of-character v’Ever for 14 years without sleeping one moment, pleaded that Hashem should night. That does not mean anything to him. mitigate Din, and he was the one who Rather, he will be impressed that I am as became the savior of the nation. Yaakov shrewd and insightful into the ways of Avinu, whose attribute was Truth, had to thievery as he is. He will respect me, and “steal the blessings” of his father and struggle therefore maybe I will have a chance to have with Lavan in an atmosphere of falsehood for a positive influence on him!” twenty years. He had to bring out the attribute of truth to a new, higher level. Yaakov wanted to improve Lavan. That was the hidden message behind “I am his “I am his brother in thievery” does not mean brother.” This explains why, throughout the he intended to cheat Lavan. That would be a entire parsha, when Lavan tricks Yaakov left, contradiction to his entire essence. It means, right, and center, Yaakov does not retaliate. “I know the profession; your father will “I am his brother in swindling” only means “I respect me. I can hopefully have an influence know the ways of swindling” — not that I over him, because I am “in charge” when it intend to use them. Heaven forbid that I comes to deception, not your father.” should actually engage in thievery. The Rambam writes (in Igrot HaRambam), The Merit of 20 Years of “that which our Rabbis interpreted ‘I am his brother in deception’ only means he could Honest Work Surpassed the demonstrate it to Lavan once or twice. Merit of the Forefathers However, deception becomes addictive.

בס''ד (Rabbi Frand from Torah.org) cutting corners, not trying to cheat people, This week’s parsha contains Yaakov’s etc. famous dream of the ladder with its legs on Perhaps this is what the Baal HaTurim the ground and its head reaching means here when Yaakov is leaving the heavenward. The Angels of G-d ascend and comfort and protection of his parental home descend the ladder. The Baal HaTurim and he’s about to embark on the rest of his makes the following interesting but almost life’s journey into the “real world”. He sees inscrutable comment: The numeric value of the ‘sulam’ [ladder] representing the the Hebrew word for ladder (sulam) equals challenges of ‘mamon’ (money=earning a the numeric value of the Hebrew word for living). He sees the Angels of G-d ascending money (mamon). This common “gematria” of and descending the ladder. He sees both the 136 obviously teaches some kind of potential for ascent as well as the potential symbolism between the Angels ascending for descent in trying to traverse the ladder = and descending the ladder and money. What attempting to earn a living. is this connection? Yaakov Avinu passed the test of earning a One of the standard interpretations of this livelihood with flying colors. Not only did he Baal HaTurim is based on the fact that one of not cut corners, he was impeccably honest. the great tests in life is how we handle He was impeccably honest with a father in money. I once read an essay from my good law who was a crook. This did not give friend Rabbi Yaakov Luban on this subject. Yaakov the rationalization to say “You need We have all observed a phenomenon in life to cheat a cheater; you need to fight fire with whereby when a person is in Yeshiva he fire.” This was not part of his calculation. strives for matters of spirituality, growth in When Yaakov finally left the house of Lavan, intellectual accomplishment, and acquisition Lavan chased after Yaakov and overtook him of Torah knowledge. Many times however, at Mt. Gilead. The Almighty came to Lavan in when this same person leaves the protective a dream and told him “Take heed that you not walls of the Yeshiva, his priorities change. He speak to Yaakov — either good or evil!” In is no longer interested in growth and his effect, G-d warned Lavan: “Don’t lay a finger spirituality begins to slip. on Yaakov Avinu.” The Medrash Tanchuma The primary reason for this is that when a says a very interesting thing on this pasuk: person leaves the Yeshiva and certainly We see from here that the merit of Yaakov’s when he goes from being single and honest work for Lavan brought him more supported by his parents to being married protective merit even than the merit of his and responsible for his own livelihood, his fathers (Zechut Avot). The Medrash bases outlook on life changes. The burden of this on the pasuk: “Except the G_d of my making a living skews a person’s entire father, the G_d of Avraham, and the Fear of outlook on life. A person becomes so Yitzchak, had been on my side, surely now consumed with trying to earn a parnasah for would you have sent me away empty. G-d himself and his family that the priorities that has seen my affliction and THE LABOR OF were important to him as a yeshiva bochur MY HANDS and He chastised last night.” (getting a good chavruta, having a ‘good [Bereshit 31:42] Elul’, etc.) often fall by the wayside and are I always felt that this dialogue here between no longer important. Instead, “I have to put Yaakov and Lavan is one of the most moving food on the table” and “I’ve got to pay the dialogues in the entire Torah. Lavan comes mortgage” become important. to Yaakov and says to him “What are you The yoke of earning a living is one of the doing? You took my daughters! You cheated major tests of life — not only in terms of me! What kind of business is this?” Yaakov making a living but also in terms of the tests a Avinu then pours out his heart at his father-in- person confronts within the working world — law. He goes through the whole litany of remaining honest, dealing with integrity, not complaints against Lavan. “I didn’t cheat you.

בס''ד You cheated me! I suffered the cold. I blessing to him. suffered the heat! I faithfully took care of your The Rambam writes in the last law of Hilchot sheep for these 20 long years! I hardly had Sechirut [13:7]: Just as the employer has to time to sleep at night. You kept changing the treat the poor (worker) honestly, so too the terms of my service to improve your position! poor (worker) is warned not to “steal” the If not for the G-d of Avraham and the Fear of work of the employer and take off a little time Yitzchak (e.g. — my Zechut Avot) that stood here and a little time there, thereby spending by me, I would be left penniless. I would have the entire day in deceit. Rather, he must be left your house a pauper. Furthermore, G-d meticulous with himself during the time he is saw my efforts and the work of my hands and working because (the Rabbis) were particular He chastised last night.” that he should not recite the fourth blessing The Medrash interprets this pasuk as follows: (of Birkat haMazon since it will “waste” the The Zechut Avot (merit of the ancestors) only time he is obligated to be working for his aided him in that it allowed him to escape employer). So too, he must work with all his Lavan without being penniless. However, the strength as the Tzadik Yaakov said “For with fact that Lavan was not able to touch him, the all my strength I worked for your father”. fact that he escaped intact, as a wealthy man Therefore, he took reward for this even in this with a large family — that was a reward for world, as it is written “And the man prospered the faithfulness of his work. It was because very very much.” Hashem saw his honesty and dedication to It is interesting to note that the Rambam his work that He appeared to Lavan and refers to Yaakov here as Yaakov haTzadik (a prohibited him from harming Yaakov in any term usually reserved for Yosef), not merely way, shape or form. Yaakov Avinu. Why is he referred to as The Medrash says we see from here that a Yaakov haTzadik? It is because he was an person should not slough off on his job. He honest worker. He is the paradigm of an should not say “I can take it easy and not put honest employee. out 100% effort for my employer.” A person must put in a full and honest effort in all his labors so that Hashem can send forth His

The Jewish Home The Bet Hamikdash serves as a mountain (Rabbi Zev Leff) (har), a place to ascend to, to look up to, a place that inspires one to feel that he is in the Not like Avraham who called it [the Bet shadow of the Shechinah, the Divine Hamikdash] "mountain," and not like Yitzchak Presence. That is the function of the Bet who called it "field," but rather like Yaukov Hamikdash emphasized by Avraham Avinu who called it "house. . ." (Pesachim 88a). "Har Hashem yera'eh-the mountain upon Rambam in the beginning of Hilchot Bet which G-d will be seen" and from which the HaBechirah lists three functions of the Bet Jewish people will be observed by G-d. This Hamikdash: (1) to be a bayit LaHashem- refers to the first Bet Hamikdash, on which literally, G-d's house; (2) to be the place the Shechinah devolved and which made a where sacrifices will be offered; and (3) to be profound impression on those who stood in the place to which the Jewish people will its shadow. ascend three times yearly to celebrate the Yitzchak emphasized the second function of Festivals. the Bet Hamikdash by calling it "field (sadeh)," a place for growth and development, an environment conducive to bringing out all man's various emotions and

בס''ד expressing them in Hashem's service. This occupy this inner area. Shalom bayis refers was the essence of the second Bet to the perfect harmony that the home HamiLdash, which lacked the full measure of engenders, where each individual feels Shechinah, but which still served as a place himself part of a unit that must function for prayer and the bringing of the sacrifices. together-each using their unique talents for a It was left to Yaakov Avinu, however, to common goal. And finally, the walls of the perceive the all-encompassing nature of the house serve as buffers against destructive Bet Hamikdash as the House of G-d. Yaakov foreign influences, hostile to Torah values. clearly knew the place of the future Mikdash Once the inner area is infused with sanctity as one where his forefathers prayed. That is and purpose, then the light from the inside why he returned after having passed by on can be projected from the windows, and the his way to Charan. Nevertheless, after intense sanctity of this home environment awakening from his dream, he exclaimed, "... can be exposed to the outside world verily G-d is in this place and I did not know There are several mitzvot that apply it.... How awesome is this place. This is none specifically to a house. The mitzvah of other than G-d's House, and this is the Shabbat lights symbolizes the sanctity that Gateway to Heaven" (Bereshit 28:16-17). the house must engender and the Although he knew of the distinction of this site enlightenment of Torah values and ethics. In as a mountain and a field, its significance as addition, the Shabbat lights symbolize the a house, which he perceived at that moment, harmony that is produced when each overshadowed either of those designations. member takes care not to step on others in That designation applies to the third Bet the darkness of ignorance and selfishness. Hamikdash, which will be eternal and The mezuzah and ma'akeh (guard-rail) influence the entire world. represent the protection the house offers Yaakov perceived this aspect of the Bet from the physical and spiritual dangers of the Hamikdash as he was ready to descend into outside world. Bedikat chametz (checking for galut, where his children would be as the dust chametz prior to Pesach) teaches us that we of the earth, trod upon by all the nations of must from time to time check to see if foreign the world, yet, at the same time, a source of influences have succeeded in invading the inspiration and blessing to the entire world. In house and remove them. Lastly, the mitzvah galut, the concept of Bet Hashem would be of Chanukah lights placed outside the door or embodied in the House of Prayer, House of in the window symbolizes the influence that Study, and the Jewish Home. These three the Jewish home can have on the outside would preserve the Jewish people in galut world. and enable them to return to Eretz Yisrael The letters of the word Bet itself hint to its and receive the ultimate Bet Hashem, the function. Bet represents binah, understanding third Temple. - understanding of what to let in and what to To appreciate the precise function of the Bet keep outside. Yud is a letter of holiness, but it Hashem, we must understand what a house also represents the unity of all the separate is. A house is basically four walls, a door, and integers that unite to form one unit of ten. The perhaps a window. The four walls serve three yud represents the holiness that pervades the functions. First, they create an interior area, a home when all of the individuals unite in private inner domain, separated from the service of Hashem with a common goal. And public domain. The Jewish home must create finally, the suf is a sign-a sign to the outside an environment of Jewish values and morals, world of the Jewish home's influence on the an inner sanctum of spirituality that serves as entire world. the foundation of Torah learning and It is significant that the parashah that depicts observance. Yaakov's first galut deals primarily with our Secondly, the walls form a partition that Mothers. The woman is the akeret habayit, encompass and unite all the individuals who and more specifically the essence of the bayit

בס''ד itself (Shabbat 118b). To survive in galut and Reprinted with permission from Artscroll Mesorah Publications, ltd. This article is provided as part of Shema Yisrael Torah Network prepare for the Bayit Hagadol Vehakadosh - Permission is granted to redistribute electronically or on paper, the Third Temple-we must strengthen our provided that this notice is included intact. For information on subscriptions, archives, and other Shema Yisrael Classes, send mail public houses, shuls, study houses, as well to [email protected] as our individual homes, to reflect the ultimate functions of that future house of G-d.

engender personal responsibility in your kids; Top 10 Parenting Mistakes encourage them to achieve on their own. Stop enabling – and star empowering. Boo-boos, blunders and mess-ups… and how to avoid them. (By Sean Grover, LCSW) 8. Bad Modeling Parenting is a doozy of an emotional workout, A parent’s first and foremost job is to be a chock-full of highs and lows, joys and good role model. Yet, there are many parents despairs. Children give you the chance to whose misbehaviors serve as poor examples keep evolving and developing as an for their children. Parents who erupt in rages, individual. Growing with your kids won’t just blame others, tell untruths, or play the victim make you a better parent – it will make you a are subconsciously training their kids to do better human being. the same. Blaming your kids for the behaviors and bad habits you taught them is So, let’s count down parenting mistakes that like blaming the mirror for your reflection. every parent is bound to make: Behave the way you want your kids to 10. Micromanaging behave. Be the person you want your kid to Micromanagers are dedicated and be. Above all, before you fault your kids for hardworking people; they love their kids and their conduct, consider amending your own. want them to succeed. The problem is that 7. Bullying they do too much for them. As a result, their Bullying parents tend to be control freaks. kids remain dependent on their parents and Rather than understand their kids, they have great difficulty standing on their own; overwhelm them with orders, directives, they have trouble self-governing, they lack threats of violence, or actual violence. They drive and motivation, and, despite their aim to shape and define their kids by intelligence, they’re emotionally immature. intimidating them, rather than letting their kids Instead of micromanaging, give your kid the unearth their own individuality. Sadly, tools to be self-reliant and independent. The children of bullying parents suffer low self- more your kids can succeed without you esteem and anxiety problems; they have lording over them, the more drive they’ll have difficulty trusting others. Bullying parents may to succeed on their own. get their way, but their kids suffer mightily for 9. Enabling it. A parent’s actions are usually well-intended 6. Inconsistency but enabling is one of the most disastrous Inconsistent parenting drives kids nuts. parenting tendencies. When parents pander Parents who change their minds often, don’t to their kids’ every need, their kids fair poorly take a stand, and have difficulty making in relationships; they expect everyone else to decisions or providing strong leadership are cater to them. They shrink from challenges very likely to produce emotionally volatile and avoid hard work yet maintain a sense of children. These children emerge with entitlement. Emotionally, they suffer from a unstable cores and weak identities. They bizarre mix of low self-esteem and arrogance. have trouble defining themselves, and often To sidestep the trap of enabling, strive to develop oppositional and defiant behaviors to

בס''ד camouflage their insecurities. Providing a understood by their parents don’t act out for stable and consistent home may not always attention and are less likely to engage in be possible but providing stable and destructive behavior. Spend quality time consistent parenting is always within reach. listening, understanding and identifying with your kids. It doesn’t cost you anything, and it 5. Criticism and Comparison will save you a fortune in therapy bills in the No one enjoys criticisms or comparisons. Yet future. many parents compulsively criticize and compare their children daily: “Why can’t you 2. Disregarding Learning Problems be more like _____?” or “Why are you so Many academic and behavioral problems are _____?” This is a surefire way to impair your the direct result of undiagnosed learning kids’ esteem and damage their fragile egos. difficulties. Impatient parents, who are too Children who are criticized grow up to think of quick to label kids lazy, unmotivated and themselves as outsiders and underachievers. apathetic about school often fail to consider They don’t celebrate their strengths, because what might really be triggering their kids’ they were never taught to do so, a direct attitudes toward learning. Even exceptionally result of having internalized their parents’ smart kids suffer from difficulties with negative voices. It only takes a thoughtless processing speed, executive functioning, and moment to hurt your kids with criticism or sensory and memory deficiencies. These comparisons – but it can take a lifetime for under-the-radar complications often don’t them to recover. emerge until middle school or high school. Such difficulties make learning a painful and 4. Poor Structure, Limits, and Boundaries exhausting experience. So save your money; Providing balanced structure, limits and psychotherapy isn’t going to help solve these boundaries is essential to good parenting. problems in the least. If your kid has even the What exactly are structure, limits and slightest difficulty with learning, an boundaries? Here’s the breakdown: Structure educational evaluation is the first step to means consistent schedules and routines; finding a solution. limits mean curbing destructive or risky behaviors by engendering good judgment; 1. Invalidating Feelings and boundaries mean honoring and When your children reveal their feelings and respecting the physical and emotional space insecurities to you, don’t contradict them, between people. Some parents are too strict correct them, offer unsolicited advice, or use with limits; some don’t provide enough it as an opportunity to lecture about your structure or boundaries. Strive to find the experiences. Remember, they are taking a right balance for your children, and they will risk in doing so; therefore; your sensitivity is be better prepared for relationships, jobs, and imperative. Kids want to feel understood; they the world outside your door. want to feel validated by their parents. Many symptoms of hyperactivity, defiance, and 3. Neglect mood problems are generated in children of Parents don’t set out to neglect their kids, but parents who invalidate their feelings. many do. Adults get absorbed in their work, delegate parenting responsibilities to eldest Parenting is a full-time job without training or children or grandparents, miss important supervision. Everyone is certain to make events in their kids’ lives, or worst of all, they mistakes, especially during those chaotic first become terrible listeners – all forms of years. But no need to fret; parenting is an emotional neglect that undermine a child’s evolutionary process. You grow into it day by healthy sense of self. Emotionally neglected day, year after year. Strive to learn from your kids always suffer mood and behavioral mistakes and improve; your parental journey problems. The simple act of listening to your will be far less hindered by self-doubt and kid has a healing effect that remedies many worries, and far more joyful for you and your parenting dilemmas. Children who feel kids.

בס''ד Red Flags in Marriage and • unrealistic expectations and demands What to Do about Them • taking each other for granted • blaming and not taking responsibility How to keep your marriage strong and • getting lost in technology, social passionate. (By Slovie Jungreis-Wolff) media, texting and emails Romance, discovery, passion. Ah, the early Relationships are the key to living a life of joy. years of marriage when everything was new. When we connect there is magic in our lives. And now? If you’re wondering “What With time it is easy to forget how to cherish happened to the love and romance in my and value our spouse. We put away the marriage?” it is not too late to make changes. dreams we shared and the laughter. We The key is awareness and desire to transform become careless with our love. We neglect to your relationship. infuse our relationship and the heart grows frigid. Every marriage has its moments of challenge. There is a difference though What can we do? between strong and weak marriages. The Begin with a conversation. Tell your spouse marriages that stand are the ones where, that you recognize a need for greater despite the differences, we maintain positive bonding. It’s not about whose fault it is or who feelings about our spouse. We are is to blame. It’s about being determined to committed. We realize that no one is perfect nurture the gift of having someone special in but living life together is a source of joy. We your life to love. Life is too short to spend can’t imagine being without one another. squabbling or living as if we are two ships Weak marriages bring a sense of disillusion. passing each other in the night. Take back A spouse withdraws physically or your relationship by strengthening your emotionally. There is less expression of love; resolve to make it work. (I am of course not ambivalence sets in. An atmosphere of being speaking about a relationship that has soured unresponsive to each other’s feelings exists. to the point that professional help is needed.) Conversation is one sided or dead. The light Here are some positive steps you can take to has dimmed. energize your connection. Red Flags in Marriage 1. Commit to time together It is normal to feel let down at times or as if Life is stressful. We get distracted. Our your relationship is coasting. But then there togetherness becomes a given and we are moments when something does not feel become careless. Plan your time together. right. Paying attention to red flags can help No phones allowed. Leave talk about put a marriage back on track. stressful topics behind. Share dreams, Here are some of the red flags that may thoughts and experiences. appear. They’re easy to ignore especially 2. Don’t be afraid to love since so many couples are dealing with the same issues. But why not make your There is a fear of being vulnerable. We think relationship the best it could possibly be? that if we express our emotions, we seem weak. We wait for the ‘other’ to be • lack of romance affectionate. We wonder why we must be the • living selfishly, absence of one to take initiative. Stop wondering and consideration and empathy start doing. Be proactive. • lack of respect-in words or actions 3. Careful with your confidences • finding excuses to be apart, seeking Don’t ask marital advice or confide in people escape who are not true proven professionals. There • overdependence on friends, parents, are plenty of advice givers; this doesn’t mean workmates

בס''ד that they are successful or correct. Do not confide negativities about your spouse to family members or friends. You may find You Need a Vacation resolution, but they will continue to carry bad How I really recharge my batteries. feelings and impressions. And if someone does not like or understand your spouse, they (By Emuna Braverman) are definitely not your ‘go to’ person for help. I told myself that after all the holidays were 4. Express your love over, I’d take a vacation, just to rest and rejuvenate. But there really wasn’t time. My Show your spouse that you do not take husband and I needed to travel overseas for her/him for granted. Little actions speak a business conference. volumes. Be considerate. Do a kindness each day. Listen to your spouse’s feelings While the conference was successful, it was and reflect empathy. Ask: what can I do to definitely work and the travel only added to give the message that you are meaningful to the effort. I told myself that when it was over, me? I would take a much-needed vacation. 5. Be compassionate Then we had to deal with some personal and community challenges which pushed off that Put yourself in the shoes of your spouse. vacation again. I told myself that when they’re Imagine his pressures, her stresses. What over (but of course they never really are) I would you want your spouse to do for you? would take a vacation, just for a change of Now ask yourself what your spouse would perspective. But there really wasn’t time. I appreciate your doing for them. I am was hosting a Shabbaton for 25 women with speaking not just about actions but sensitive a speaker from out-of-town. Thank G-d, the words. Be open to hearing your spouse’s program was successful. fears and worries. A listening heart brings compassion. Finally, my husband turned to me and said, “Now we can go on vacation.” Our calendars 6. Don’t hold onto anger could easily be cleared. Let’s seize the There is no room in marriage for grudges. We moment. are all human. We all make mistakes. Too All of the sudden I was reluctant. Not just often we bring up incidents that are long because he’s more spontaneous than me. I gone. Let it go. Show understanding; forgive. didn’t really want to go. Suddenly I didn’t feel Don’t use your mouth as a weapon of mass like I needed a vacation. Despite all my destruction. Move ahead by leaving the ‘if kvetching, I realized that I actually had not only’, ‘could’ve’, would’ve’ and ‘should’ve’ been drained by all these experiences; I had behind. Speak about what is hurting you now, been energized. live in the present. And when you speak about your sadness or pain do it without The Torah teaches us that “mitzvah goreret blame. Look for solutions instead of mitzvah”, that one mitzvah leads to another. If problems. In a calm tone and without giving a we get habituated to doing mitzvot, we will lecture, tell your spouse how you would like continue along that path. But it’s more than to handle this situation differently in the that. One mitzvah leads to another because future. Be sure that you speak in privacy. after doing the mitzvah, we feel good. We feel excited. We feel invigorated. We want to Taking the time to make your relationship a engage in another meaningful act, another priority is one of the greatest gifts you can act of connecting to G-d so that we can get give yourself. Having a partner to share your that feeling all over again. life with, to face both trials and joy, is a most valuable treasure. Nurture the relationship When a real vacation (albeit a short one) was and keep your love alive. actually in the offing, it was no longer so appealing. I was on fire. I was ready for more. I had deluded myself into thinking I needed a

בס''ד break. I had been affected by the comments milestones, creating everlasting memories and sentiments of those around me – you with my son. The times with friends. Sitting must be so tired (yes that part’s true), you around the family table and reminiscing on really need to get away – and hadn’t really crazy family times. looked inside. The pinch of salt represents the part of my I didn’t want to go on vacation. I didn’t want to life’s journey that’s heartbreak, stress, feeling slow down. I wanted to keep going. I wanted overwhelmed or lonely. The pain. Those more. times where you feel like you need a good But there are many types of mitzvot we can cry. Something triggers it and you just break do, the most important one of course being down. chesed, kindness to our spouse. And my Have you ever walked into the Dead Sea only husband really did need a break. So, I put my to discover cuts and open wounds you didn’t needs aside (I am truly a selfless wife!) and even know existed? I sure have! You let forced myself (!) to go on vacation. Maybe I yourself feel those open wounds. did need it, maybe not. It was also And the salty moments in your life may come energizing, and it was certainly good to have about even during the sugary ones. My son some uninterrupted time together. (Oh, the standing so proud at his graduation from sacrifices we’ll make!) Kindergarten last year. Dressed in beautiful But I really did learn a lesson. I didn’t need a Shabbat clothing holding his brand-new vacation. I was energized by the giving, by siddur, feeling accomplished and noble. But I the caring, by the investing, by the doing of get all emotional when I think about that mitzvot. That was an important insight to beautiful moment because Motty wasn’t there keep in my back pocket. Along with the fact next to me shouting his name and saying that sometimes we or someone we love may how proud he was of our son. Or when I’m truly need a break… out with couples and it’s an odd number at the table. Those nights when I have no other

obligations and I put Dovid to bed and it’s just After My Husband’s me and the four walls with no one to talk to, no one at home to go over the highs and lows Passing: Life as a Challah of my day. No one to laugh with me while Recipe watching Golden Girls reruns. Learning from the salty moments and Water. Oh, the water! The tears! I don’t want holding on to the sugary ones as long as I put you in a down mood. In my life not all can. (By Stephanie Pollak) tears came from sad and painful moments. They’ve come from some of the best My beloved husband, Motty, passed away conversations, something funny on social just over four years ago. And I’ve been media, Dovid being his whackodoodle self discovering how all the ingredients that go and I’m loving every second of being in that into baking challah encapsulate different moment. But more often than not the water parts of my life. comes from waves of grieving that can hit me The basic ingredients include flour, sugar, unexpectedly. The water often goes hand in yeast, salt, water and oil. hand with the pain from the salt. Feeling at a low. Flour is the ingredient used in bulk when preparing challah. Flour represents In order to bake challah you need a key everything and anything in my life. The active ingredient. You need yeast. For me, people, the material things, the routines etc. the yeast represents the moments where I’m Everything. motivated to actively work on myself. To listen to a Torah class or read a book that Sugar represents the good times, the inspires me, to take time for self-improvement treasured sweet moments. The laughter, the

בס''ד and self-care. Being pro-active is the only rising. I’ve been working on myself. Taking way our lives can get better, the only way to salty moments in my life and learning from get out of a rut. We must take action. them. Growing from them. Holding on to the I use tons of yeast in my challah recipe of life. sugary moments for as long as I can. Time. I may feel at a low, but I don’t let myself stay We need to take the time to rise. To grow. To there for long. Each day, I work my muscles become who we are supposed to become. hard, making my way through the ups and The final and most important step in downs by kneading. preparing challah is prayer. When we rip off The last and final ingredient is the oil. Back in an egg-size piece of dough to perform the the time of the Holy Temple in Jerusalem, mitzvah of hafrashas challah, separating the when a king was anointed oil would be challah, we recite a special blessing. That is poured down his head. The oil in my life is G- an opportune time to pray, for anyone and d. I have tremendous belief that at the young anything. When I’ve turned to G-d, cried to G- age of 25 years old with a 2-year-old son I d, gave praise and prayed to G-d, I rose. had to experience the loss of my husband, Sometimes instantly and sometimes I needed and all the trials and tests that led up to it and time. after. When I add the oil, I am showing that I May we all recognize how important each have full trust in G-d that I will make it out on ingredient is in our life. And may the delightful top with His help and guidance. When I rub aromas of our challah baking fill our souls, the oil into the batch of dough, I am our homes, our marriages, our relationships increasing my level of belief and trust in G-d. with our children, with our communities and One of the most crucial steps when preparing most importantly enhance our relationship challah is time. Patiently letting the dough with G-d. rise. Over the last four plus years I’ve been

DAILY HALACHOT

equipment. However, if one took food,

Halachot of Shabbat beverage or medicine on Shabbat on credit, (Daily Halacha) he is obligated to pay for the item he bought. Receiving Compensation for Work Done The prohibition applies to all forms of on Shabbat compensation, including forgoing a debt. It is The Hachamim forbade receiving permissible however to take food or medicine compensation for work done on Shabbat. on credit and pay for it after Shabbat. This restriction is known as “Sechar Receiving Compensation for Work Done Shabbat,” and it applies even to work on Shabbat-2 permitted on Shabbat. Even if the payment is rendered after Shabbat, it is still forbidden. The Hachamim prohibited “Sechar Shabbat”- receiving compensation for work done on The Mishna Berura (Rav Yisrael Meir Kagan Shabbat. However, it is permissible to receive of Radin, 1839-1933) in 306:21 rules that the payment for such work if it is subsumed in prohibition applies both to the employee, as payment for other work that was not done on well as the employer. The employer is liable Shabbat. This leniency is known as for causing the worker to sin. It applies to “Havla’ah.” work done on Yom Tob, as well. There is no difference whether the work performed was The Shemirat Shabbat K’Hilhata discusses a actual labor, a service or renting property or number of practical applications of

בס''ד “Havla’ah.” Generally, there is no issue for a or after Shabbat, then there is no possibility Jewish hotel owner to receive a rental fee for of “Havla’ah,” and it is a problem to receive a room that was booked just for Shabbat, that compensation. Similarly, in order to pay since included in that fee is also the time the a babysitter for work done only on Shabbat, guest spent in the room immediately before they should be assigned an additional and after Shabbat. Theoretically, even if a responsibility before or after Shabbat so that guest would arrive with the onset of Shabbat the payment can be subsumed in it. There is and depart as Shabbat concluded, the also the possibility of giving them the payment would still include the cooking and compensation as a gift, but that is deemed as cleaning done before Shabbat to prepare for bordering on trickery. his arrival. SUMMARY: One may receive compensation The case of waiters who work only for a few for work done on Shabbat, if the payment is hours on Shabbat presents a more serious subsumed in another payment due for other issue. If they are not assigned a task before work not done on Shabbat.

DAF YOMI

Presence, Hashem would reveal to them the secrets Daf Yomi Masechet of the Torah. The Sifte Chaim explains based on the Menahot words of the Gra and the Maharal that the first Bet HaMikdash existed in the merit of the Patriarchs, and (Daf Notes) when the Bet HaMikdash was destroyed, the merit of Where to Move the Yeshivah the Patriarchs ceased to function. The second Bet Ma’aseh Ish (V, 27) recounts that HaGaon Rabbi Hillel HaMikdash, however, endured in the merit of Jewish Vitkind asked the Chazon Ish zt”l that his yeshivah, Bet People’s service of Hashem. When needless hatred Hillel, then in Tel Aviv, was unsuccessful there. Should was rampant amongst the nation and caused a rift he move it to Bnei Berak? Why not? Because Bnei Berak amongst the Jewish People, and they were not united has many Yeshivot. “On the contrary”, replied the in serving Hashem, they had no merit to have the Bet Chazon Ish, “to a town of vegetables take vegetables – to a town where many vegetables grow bring your HaMikdash. It follows that the Divine Presence was vegetables to sell as everyone gathers there to buy” always present. In the first Bet HaMikdash the Divine (Rashi). Presence was manifest, but was not dependant on the merit of the nation. In the second Bet HaMikdash, Divine Presence the Divine Presence was reflected through the strong The Gemara states that the Ner Maaravi was a sign connection that the Jewish People had with Hashem. that the Divine Presence rested amongst the Jewish This manifestation of the Divine Presence, however, People. The Sifte Chaim notes that this phenomenon was different, as it was only manifest in the hearts of apparently occurred even while the second Bet those who merited the Presence, i.e. the righteous HaMikdash stood. This is implied in the Gemara Yoma scholars of that generation. The statement that the that states that while Shimon HaTzaddik was the Ner Maaravi is a testimony means that just like a Kohen Gadol, the Ner Hamaaravi was never witness bears testimony on a matter, so too the Ner extinguished. After Shimi HaTzaddik’s reign, Maaravi was a testimony that the Divine Presence sometimes the Ner Hamaaravi would stay lit, and was manifest amongst the righteous scholars of that sometimes it would be extinguished. On the other generation. It is understandable, then, why the Jewish hand, we find in many instances in the words of People agreed to build the second Bet HaMikdash, Chazal that the Divine Presence was not manifest in after Hashem promised them regarding the revelation the second Bet HaMikdash. Chazal even state that the of the Oral Law [as the revelation of the Oral Law was Jews did not want to build the second Bet HaMikdash more pronounced during the Second Temple Era than until Hashem reassured them that in lieu of the Divine any other time period in Jewish history]. Although the

בס''ד Jews were not promised the return of the Divine The Belzer Rebbe asks: How was this requirement Presence that was manifest during the First Temple met during Chanukah, since the oil that burned all Era, since they were promised the revelation of the week had not been sanctified in that vessel? Oral Law, this in a sense was a form of the Divine The Tzitz Eliezer answers that according to the Taz, Presence. The manifestation of the Divine Presence in the miracle of the oil was that each morning, some oil the second Bet Hamikdash was certainly different remained from the previous night. This oil was able to than in the first Bet Hamikdash, but nonetheless the produce additional oil. As such, each morning’s Divine Presence was manifest and the Jewish People miraculous oil was the outgrowth of leftover agreed to rebuild the Bet Hamikdash. sanctified oil, and therefore it retained the original sanctification, and it was also the facilitating source Chanukah Oil for the sanctity of any oil that came from it. The Gemara states that before oil could be poured into the lamps of the Menorah in the Temple, it had to be sanctified through a half-log vessel.

KID’Z KORNER

Originally, Yaakov started off with InterestIng MIdrash plenty of money, jewels and gifts. But (from Torah Tots) moments after Yaakov cleared the MAKING A GROWN MAN CRY Brachot from Yitzchak, he zoomed off towards Charan before Esav could When Yaakov first saw Rachel, he bawled catch him. Esav ordered his son, like a baby. That's right! And with good Elifaz, to catch Yaakov and kill him. reason... Elifaz did eventually track down A few good reasons to be exact: Yaakov. 1. When Yaakov laid eyes on Rachel, he Now Elifaz had a dilemma. Even knew she was destined to be his wife, though he was Esav's son, he grew up so he kissed her. The shepherds that in Yitzchak's house and learned 'some' gathered at the well grumbled about decent things from his grandfather. He the immorality of this stranger kissing knew it was wrong to kill Yaakov. But one of their women. They didn't realize he also wanted to do the Mitzvah of that Yaakov and Rachel were cousins. Kibud Av (honoring one's father) and Yaakov was saddened that he was carry out Esav's orders. judged to have committed an immoral Yaakov came up with a creative act. solution. According to the Torah, a Yaakov immediately knew that though poor man is equivalent to a dead man. Rachel was destined to be his wife, Therefore, Yaakov told Elifaz to take she would die at a young age and they all his possessions and Elifaz would wouldn't be buried together. be able to go back and tell his father that Yaakov is dead. 2. When Eliezer had come to Charan seeking a wife for Yitzchak, he brought Now, Yaakov would have to face the camels loaded to the hilt with lots of diabolical Lavan with no gifts, jewels or cash precious jewels and gifts for the and ask for Rachel's hand in marriage. Machatanim (In Laws). But Yaakov (That's enough to make any grown man cry!) was about to face Lavan empty- handed. Here's why:

בס''ד The Chafetz Chaim Teaches The Young Kid’z Korner (Revach) Rav Shimon Schwab How To Be A Kohen

The Son & The Wallet (Adapted from Mishlei When Reb Shimon Schwab was a young Yaakov, pp. 66-67) bachur, he had the opportunity to visit the After Yaakov left his home in Beersheba, he Chafetz Chaim. In the course of the visit, the vowed to serve G-d faithfully if G-d would: (a) Chafetz Chaim asked him whether he was a protect him on his journey, (b) provide him Kohen or Yisrael. R’ Schwab answered that with food and clothing, and (c) return him to he was a Yisrael. The Chafetz Chaim then his father's house. said, “I am a Kohen. Do you know what difference it makes whether I am a Kohen or G-d in fact appeared to Yaakov in a vision, Yisrael? When Moshiach comes we’ll all go promising: "I am with you; I will protect you up to Yerushalayim and we’ll all clamor to wherever you go and bring you back to this enter the Bet Hamikdash to bring karbonos land." and to perform the avodah. We’ll run to the This covered Yaakov's first and last requests. gates of the Bet Hamikdash and then But what about the food and clothing? suddenly we will be stopped. I will be Cash for the Trip allowed to enter the Bet Hamikdash, but you will be forced to remain outside. Those who Michael needed to send his son on a long are forced to wait outside will be extremely journey. He prepared everything the boy jealous of the Kohanim who were allowed in would require for the trip, including a wallet to perform the avodah.” with cash to pay for various expenses on the way. The Chafetz Chaim continued, “What caused this situation? Three thousand years ago, But before his son headed out, Michael when Bnei Yisrael made the egel, Moshe received disturbing news. Bandits were Rabbeinu stood by the gate of the camp and making trouble on the roads, attacking and cried out, ‘Whoever is for Hashem should join robbing innocent travelers. Michael decided me!’ My ancestors hurried to stand before that the situation was too dangerous for his Moshe Rabbeinu ready to do as he directed. son to travel on his own, so last minute he Obviously, your ancestors did not answer his changed the plan. He would join his son on call. My ancestors merited the Kehuna as the journey. reward for their deeds.” As they started out early the next morning, The Chafetz Chaim finished his story and the boy suddenly looked nervous. "Father, said, “Why am I telling you this? Because where is the money purse you prepared for each person of Bnei Yisrael has his moments me? I will need it for my expenses on the when he hears an inner call of ‘Whoever is road!" for Hashem…’ One day when you hear this Michael smiled. "Son, what do you need call in your heart, take action and don’t be money for? I will be with you on the trip. I will lazy! Don’t repeat the same mistake that pay for everything we need." your forefathers made, which caused them to "I am with you" lose such a valuable gift!” (Chayim Sheyash Bahem)

The father's response is exactly what G-d told Yaakov: "I am with you, and I will protect Rav Eliyahu Lopian Ponders Tefilin And you..." Since G-d would be with Yaakov, it Transistor Radios was no longer necessary for Him to promise R’Eliyahu Lopian once met one of his food and clothing; G-d would watch over all of students in the hallway holding a transistor Yaakov's needs. "I will not abandon you," G-d radio. He asked the student, “Does the radio promised Yaakov. I will always be there to really work without being plugged in to an answer your prayers. electrical socket?” The student answered

that this was true. R’ Lopian then said, “If

בס''ד even one little screw was missing, I assume it sept ans pour sa fille cadette,Rachel. A would probably not operate properly l’approche du mariage, Lavan organise sa anymore.” The student answered that this supercherie. Il rassemble toute la ville et was also true. demande à ses habitants d’être les complices de sa ruse. A la place de Rachel, Lavan The student wondered what this conversation donna Léa sous la Houpa. Personne ne was all about, but R’ Lopian then revealed savait que,depuis déjà sept ans, Yaacov what he really was thinking about. “If this is avait anticipé cette trahison. true, why do we find it hard to believe that we if we position a little box on our head Et pourtant il est écrit: » Ce fut au matin qu’il (indicating the place of tefillin), it channels vit que c’était Léa « . Le Talmud,dans le traité kedusha from Shamayim without a visual deMéguila (13, b),enseigne que Rachel connection? This is true only if the four transmit les codes qu’ avait donnés Yaacov à parshiyos of the Torah are written with sa sœur Léa, afin qu’elle ne soit pas complete perfection and kedusha. If even humiliée. Rachel Iménou attend depuis sept one letter is defective, the connection is lost ans de se marier avec son Hatan. Elle sait and the kedusha is blocked. We can qu’ils doivent donner naissance aux douze understand from the radio that this is true! tribus, qu’elle va devenir une des mères (Lev Eliyahu) fondatrices de notre peuple. Elle n’hésita pas pour autant à sacrifier ce monde-ci et le monde futur afin que sa sœur ne soit pas PAR LA FRANCOPHONE bafouée! De plus, elle n’avait aucune garantie que Yaacov accepterait de se marier avec elle après. Yaacov aurait pu dire que si (Rav Itshak Nabet) c’était la volonté Divine, alors qu’il en soit ainsi. Malgré tout, elle donna les signes à sa Notre Mère Rachel sœur. « Les chemins d’Hachem sont droits, les Depuis la création du monde, les disputes et justes les emprunteront… » Ochéa (14, 10). les jalousies entre frères n’ont cessé de Le rav Chlomo Bravda zrouto zagen alénou détruire. La première fraternité entre Kaïn et explique que ce verset fait référence à la abel s’acheva par un meurtre. Puis Ham, le Torah. Lorsque nous lisons le livre de fils de Noah, voulut empêcher la venue d’un Béréchit, nous devons chercher quelles sont autre frère. Cette haine se retrouva chez les leçons qu’Hachem veut nous transmettre Ichmael et Itshak, Essav et Yaacov.Rachel à travers la vie de nos aïeux. Comment nous fut la première qui, non seulement ne désira élever, emprunter ces routes qu’ont tracées pas la chute de sa sœur, mais sacrifia son nos pères? Intéressons-nous à une des bonheur pour elle. Si nous continuons dans leçons importantes que nous enseigne notre l’histoire,nous pouvons voir comment ces paracha Vayétsé. descendants héritèrent de ce trait de Yaacov avinou est parti chez son oncle caractère. Son fils, Yossef, fut vendu par ses Lavan afin de trouver une épouse. A son frères en Egypte. Il devint le bras droit du arrivée, il rencontreRachel iménou. Hachem Pharaon. Et même après la mort de Yaacov, leur montra par prophétie que cette union il ne se vengea pas de ses frères et continua donnera naissance au peupled’Israël. à leur faire du bien. Enfin Yossef eut deux Cependant, Rachel sait que son père Lavan fils, Ménaché l’aîné et Ephraïm le cadet. est le roi des escrocs. Il ne la laissera jamais Lorsque Yaacov avinou décida de bénir le se marier avant sa grande sœur Léa. cadet en premier, Ménaché accepta avec joie. Et c’est une des raisons pour laquelle Yaacov, pour empêcher toute supercherie, lui nous bénissons nos enfants pour qu’ils soient transmet des signes, des codes qui comme Efraïm et Ménaché. Nous voyons prouveront son identité. Yaacov avinou que cet amour fraternel fut transmis de père conclut un accord avec Lavan: il travaillera

בס''ד en fils jusqu’à devenir un des codes Les Larmes de Léa génétiques de notre peuple. Dans la paracha de la semaine, Vayétsé, la Hélas, à cause des exils, nous avons appris Torah raconte la vie de Yaacov à Haran et des goyim l’égoïsme et l’indifférence,et, pire ses mariages avec Léa et Rahel. Comme encore,l’esprit de compétition et la haine vous le savez, Yaacov était poursuivi par gratuite. Nous avons délaissé l’enseignement Essav. Sa mère, Rivka, lui ordonna de fuir de notre mèreRachel, et nous avons revêtu vers sa maison natale et de chercher une les habits de notre oncle Essav. Lorsque femme. Après avoir été dépouillé par Elifaz, nous lisons ces sections de la Torah, nous le fils d'Essav, Yaacov arrive sans le sou devons prendre sur nous de nous élever pour chez Lavan, le frère de Rivka. « Lavan avait suivre le bon exemple. Comme vous le deux filles, Léa, l'aînée qui avaitles yeux savez, il existe aujourd’hui un livre sur les lois abîmés, et Rahel, la cadette, qui était jolie. entre l’homme et son prochain, les préceptes Yaacov aimait Rahel et proposa à de paix. Nous devons fixer un temps Lavan detravailler sept années pour elle ». Le quotidien ou hebdomadaire pour étudier ces jour du mariage, Lavan trompa Yaacov en lui lois afin de respecter et d’aimer chaque juif donnant Léa pour femme. Le lendemain, comme notre propre frère. Yaacov, trahi, demanda des comptes à son Lorsque le premier Temple fut détruit et que beau-père. "Nous n'avons pas l'habitude, les juifs furent exilés, le prophète Jérémie alla chez nous, de marier la cadette avant l’aînée. à Hévronpour demander à nos patriarches de Si tu veux, la semaine prochaine, je te donne prier pour les bné Israël. Chacun demanda aussi Rachel à la condition que tu travailles miséricorde àHachem, mais la colère Divine pour moi encore sept ans" lui répondirent ne s’apaisa pas. Il partit demander à Moché Lavan. Yaacov accepta et se maria une Rabénou de prier pour son troupeau. semaine plus tard avec Rahel. Hachem répondit: » J’ai envoyé des Le Midrach et le Talmud Baba Batra (123, a) prophètes afin qu’il arrête de servir des dieux s'interrogent face à la description de Léa : étrangers. J’ai été patient, Je me suis tu, J’ai pourquoi la Torah dénigra-t-elle cette eu pitié…Mais la limite a été dépassée. » Tsadekette et releva qu'elle avait les yeux Alors Rachel Iménou prit la parole et dit: abîmés ? Rava répondit que ce n'est pas « Maître du monde, pourquoi une punition si péjoratif, et qu'au contraire la Torah voulu sévère? Si c’est parce qu’ils ont fait entrer louer Léa. Car elle avait entendu ce des dieux étrangers dans Ta maison, n’ai- je que les gens disaient :" Rivka a deux fils et pas fait entrer une concurrente dans ma Lavan deux filles, la grande pour le grand, maison? N’ai-je pas supporté toutes ces Essav, et la petite pour le petit." Elle années pour ne pas lui faire honte? Toi qui demanda alors aux voyageurs s'ils es Patient, Miséricordieux, Bon…Ne peux tu connaissaient Essav. Ils lui répondirent que pas supporter une servante dans ta c'était un homme mauvais et un brigand. Elle maison? » Hachem accepta la prière de pleura tellement à cause de cela que ses Racheliménou et promit que les exilés yeux s'abîmèrent. retourneraient sur leur Terre. Le Chem Michmouel s'étonna du Nous avons plus que jamais besoin comportement de Léa. Pourquoi se mettre qu’Hachem nous pardonne et nous donne dans un tel état alors qu’il lui suffisait de réellement le Pays de nos ancêtres. Alors refuser de se marier ? A priori, les deux imitons notre sainte mère, pardonnons, sœurs étaient déjà âgées. Personne ne la passons l’éponge, aimons chaque juif comme força à prendre pour époux Essav. Et même notre propre chair afin de voir la Délivrance si elle était petite, nous voyons à propos de finale le plus rapidement et le plus facilement Rivka que Lavan lui demanda si elle voulait possible, amen ken yéhi ratson. partir épouser Itshak avinou. Plus encore, dans le Midrach Tanhouma, il est écrit que "des accords liaient Léa et Essav, et Yaacov

בס''ד et Rahel". Cependant, nulle part n'est élevées que les sphères célestes mais qui, mentionnée une relation entre Rivka et cependant, demeurent méprisées par les Lavan. Ils habitaient à plus de 600 km de gens. Il s'agit de la prière, nous disent les distance. Et, plus encore, nous voyons sages. Nous devons en effet comprendre que qu'Essav s'était déjà marié avec trois femmes tout dépend d'elle : la santé, la réussite : si Léa lui était liée, pourquoi ne pas l'avoir spirituelle et matérielle, notre couple, déjà épousée ? l'éducation de nos enfants... Et même si la Ce rav répondit à l'aide d'un enseignement punition est déjà décrétée, à l'aide dela prière du Ari zal. Lorsque des âmes descendent sur et des pleurs nous pouvons tout changer, Terre, elles viennent deux par deux : homme enseigne le Zohar. et femme. Une fois le moment de rentrer En outre, il nous arrive parfois de prier pour dans le corps, elles se séparent. Si ce couple une demande qui ne semble pas exaucée. Il est méritant, ils peuvent se retrouver et se faut savoir que chaque requête possède un reformer. prix. Parfois, pour obtenir une chose Le Chem Michmouel explique que les liens importante, il faut de nombreuses prières. Et qui unissaient Léa et Essav précédaient leur même si une personne prie pendant cinq ou venue sur Terre. Ils étaient âmes sœurs. dix ans, si la quantité de pleurs et Or Léa, par prophétie, apprit qu'elle lui était desupplications n'atteint pas le prix de sa destinée. Elle se renseigna donc sur le délivrance, il lui faudra encore persévérer. comportement de son futur époux. Toute fois nos sages nous disent que Lorsqu'elle connut ses agissements, elle l'attente prouve la grandeur de la délivrance. commença à prier chaque jour et à pleurer Par exemple, Hanna, la mere de Chmouel le afin de ne pas devenir la femme de cet impie. prophète, pria de longues années pour son A ce propos, rav Houna nous disait : premier fils, qui devint plus tard un des plus "regardez la puissance de la prière qui permit grands dirigeants de notre histoire. Or, elle à Léa d'annuler un décret céleste et lui donna eut après lui encore six autres fils dont nous le mérite de se marier avant Rahel." Nos ne connaissons même pas le nom. C'est sages constatèrent que les pleurs de Léa lui parce que Chmouel fut le fruit de ces permirent d'acquérir denombreux bienfaits : nombreuses années de pleurs qu’il se révéla elle enfanta en premier. Elle mit au monde si exceptionnel. six des douze tribus. Parmi ses enfants se Ce qui est vrai pour les délivrances trouvait Lévi, le père des cohanim et personnelles l'est tout autant à propos des des léviim, Yéouda, le père de la royauté qui délivrances collectives. Si le prix de l'ère donna naissance à David Amelekh et sa messianique paraît si cher, il paraît évident descendance et enfin Issakhar, le père des que la récompense sera au-delà de toutes étudiants de la Torah. Et enfin elle mérita nos espérances. C'est pourquoi nous ne d'être enterrée avec Yaacov dans la devons pas mépriser la force de la prière grotte de Marpella aux côtés d'Adam et Eve, afin de mériter, tout prochainement, les Avraham et Sarah et Itshak et Rivka. délivrances personnelles et collectives que La guémara, dans le traité de Brakhot (6, b) nous désirons tous, amen ken yéhi ratson. nous dit qu'il existe des vertus qui sont aussi

Poco después de comenzar a trabajar para REFLEXION SEMANAL Labán, Yaakov accedió a laborar durante siete años a cambio de casarse con Rajel. La Torá nos dice que este período pasó con (Rav Yonatan Gefen) gran celeridad para Yaakov. “Y Yaakov Tiempo de Espera trabajó durante siete años por Rajel y le

בס''ד parecieron pocos días por su amor hacia Tablas que le traería al pueblo. Sin embargo, ella” (1). el pueblo calculó equivocadamente el final de Muchos comentaristas señalan una dificultad esos cuarenta días y esperó que Moshé obvia. Por lo general, cuando una persona volviera antes de lo previsto. Las fuentes espera ansiosamente un evento rabínicas nos dicen que el Satán les mostró determinado, el tiempo de espera parece que Moshé estaba muerto. Esto desató una pasar muy lentamente. Sin embargo, en este cadena de eventos que resultó en el pecado caso, la Torá nos dice que los siete años de del Becerro de Oro. Sin embargo, parecería espera para casarse con Rajel parecieron injusto que el pueblo sea sometido a una unos pocos días. ¿Cómo puede ser? prueba tan difícil como ver a su amado líder, Moshé, sin vida. ¿Por qué fueron Para responder esta pregunta, primero enfrentados a semejante prueba? debemos entender por qué lo normal es que el período de espera sea dolorosamente La respuesta es que el Satán sólo tuvo poder lento. En la mayoría de los casos, la persona para afectar al pueblo, cuando este mostró que espera ansiosamente un evento, percibe una carencia en cierta área. El iétzer hará (3) el tiempo de espera como un mero sólo tiene poder cuando hay una debilidad en impedimento para el objeto de su deseo. Es una persona, en tal caso puede exponer esa sabido que cuando algo es incómodo o debilidad. En el caso de la construcción del doloroso parece durar mucho tiempo. Así, Becerro de Oro, pareciera que el defecto de una persona para quien el período de espera las personas fue su impaciencia para el es un obstáculo, lo percibe como algo no retorno de Moshé y la recepción de la Torá. placentero y, entonces, siente que el tiempo Esta impaciencia los llevó a entrar en pánico transcurre muy lento. cuando Moshé no volvió en el momento que esperaban. Consecuentemente, el Satán Sin embargo, Yaakov percibió la espera de tenía ahora una veta que podía explotar. siete años por Rajel de una manera muy diferente. Su amor hacia ella no estaba Así, vemos que la debilidad que desató los basado en lujuria, sino en un profundo eventos que condujeron posteriormente al sentimiento y, habiendo reconocido su Becerro de Oro, fue el entendimiento grandeza, Yaakov quería ser el mejor marido incorrecto respecto al período que Moshé posible. Entendió que el tiempo hasta su pasaría en el Monte Sinaí. La actitud del matrimonio con Rajel no era un obstáculo, pueblo fue esperar ansiosamente que pasara sino una gran oportunidad para mejorarse a el tiempo, para poder continuar hacia la sí mismo. En consecuencia, percibió cada etapa siguiente en su aceptación de la Torá. momento como una oportunidad invaluable Sin embargo, deberían haber percibido ese para prepararse aún más para el matrimonio. tiempo de la misma forma en que lo hizo Con esa actitud, el tiempo no era visto de Yaakov cuando esperó para casarse con manera negativa, sino positiva. Yaakov Rajel: como una oportunidad para mejorarse valoraba el tiempo, no lo veía como algo a sí mismos, para estar más preparados para doloroso, sino como algo valioso. Y así como recibir las Tablas. Si hubiesen adoptado esa sabemos que las situaciones incómodas actitud, habrían estado menos enfocados en pasan con lentitud, también sabemos que las el final del período de espera y más en circunstancias placenteras lo hacen con gran aprovecharlo tanto como fuera posible (4). velocidad. Entonces, los siete años le Hemos visto ejemplos en la Torá de la forma parecieron como unos pocos días (2). correcta y la incorrecta de vivir la espera de Hay otro famoso incidente en la Torá, en el determinados eventos. Es obvio que el cual el pueblo judío pareció tropezar en esta desafío de lidiar con períodos de espera es misma área. En la parashá Ki Tisá, después uno que las personas enfrentan de haber recibido los Diez Mandamientos, constantemente. Puede ser en el área de Moshé pasó cuarenta días en el Monte Sinaí, esperar que ocurran eventos importantes, en donde aprendió toda la Torá y recibió las como el momento en que una persona

בס''ד soltera encuentra a quien eventualmente “Y Di-s recordó a Rajel, y Di-s la escuchó, y será su pareja. O quizás en las ocurrencias abrió su útero. Ella quedó embarazada y tuvo cotidianas, como embotellamientos de un hijo, y dijo: ‘Di-s ha quitado mi oprobio’. Y tránsito o colas largas y frustrantes en el llamó su nombre Iosef, diciendo: ‘Que supermercado. Cualquiera sea la duración y Hashem me agregue otro hijo’”1. la razón de la espera, el principio es siempre Después de muchos años de esterilidad, la el mismo: no deberíamos percibir esos matriarca Rajel tuvo finalmente el mérito de momentos como molestias que evitan que dar a luz a un hijo, y su reacción ante este alcancemos nuestro objetivo. En cambio, uno alegre evento fue pedir otro. Esta reacción es debería darse cuenta de que todo viene de un poco sorprendente… ¡es como si un niño Dios, incluyendo los molestos o dolorosos le pidiera a sus padres otro regalo en lugar períodos de espera. Se debe tomar la de agradecerles por el regalo que acaba de decisión de evitar desperdiciar esos períodos recibir2! o, peor aún, frustrarse y enojarse. Por el contrario, deberíamos reconocer que son En realidad, el deseo de Rajel no era un oportunidades que nos brinda Dios para deseo de tener más en el ámbito de la acercarnos a Él. Así, una persona que gashmiut (lo material), sino que era producto espera encontrar a su media naranja debería de su gran deseo de crecer en rujaniut advertir que este período de su vida no es (espiritualidad). Para Rajel, tener más hijos simplemente un tiempo en el que la vida se significaba tener un rol más fundamental en detiene hasta que encuentre a su pareja, la construcción de la nación judía, y eso era sino un tiempo valioso durante el cual puede precisamente lo que reflejaba su pedido. Por trabajar su personalidad y prepararse para su lo tanto, la petición de Rajel era en realidad futuro matrimonio. Y, cuando uno este similar a la petición de alguien que acaba de atascado en el tráfico o en una cola, podría terminar de estudiar una sección de la Torá y usar ese tiempo para estudiar Torá o para que le pide a Di-s que le permita completar otros fines necesarios. otra. No es una señal de ingratitud, sino que es una expresión del deseo que tiene la Aprendemos de la actitud de Yaakov durante persona de crecer espiritualmente. los siete largos años de espera por Rajel, que los períodos de espera son Esta idea también nos ayuda a entender otro oportunidades para el crecimiento y no difícil versículo de esta parashá. Después de cargas que hay que superar. Que todos que Lea dio a luz a cuatro hijos en una rápida ameritemos utilizar nuestro tiempo de la sucesión, la Torá nos dice que Rajel estaba manera óptima. celosa de su hermana mayor3. Rashi explica que Rajel estaba celosa de las buenas Notas: 1) Vayetzé 29:20. 2) Esta explicación está acciones de Lea porque sentía que había basada en varios comentarios (ver Taam VeDáat, recibido muchos hijos gracias a su rectitud. Vayetzé 29:10; también se escuchó un enfoque similar de Rav David Rosenthal en nombre de Rav Shimshon Basado en este razonamiento, lo lógico Pinkus), pero difiere en algunos aspectos. Ver también habría sido que Rajel luchara para mejorar Reem, Malbim y Maharil Diskin en este versículo, para sus acciones. Sin embargo, en lugar de respuestas alternativas a esta pregunta. 3) Que es lo hacerlo, le pidió a su esposo Yaakov que mismo que el Satán. 4) Esta explicación está basada en las enseñanzas de Rav Efraím Kramer. Como rezara por ella. ¿Por qué no luchó primero siempre, debería notarse que los errores de personas para mejorar su propio comportamiento en grandiosas como las de la generación que recibió la lugar de pedirle a Yaakov que rezara4? Torá son inmensamente amplificadas por la Torá para que podamos entenderlas desde nuestro nivel y Quizás podemos explicar que entre las derivar así enseñanzas apropiadas. “buenas acciones” que envidiaba Rajel estaba el intenso deseo de Lea de procrear para tener el mérito de construir la nación Desear la Grandeza judía. Consecuentemente, Rajel se esforzó para emular el gran deseo de Lea, y una

בס''ד forma para hacer esto era pedirle a un trataba, todos estarían de acuerdo. ¿Quién hombre justo como Yaakov que rezara por era esa grandiosa persona? ella; está acción era en sí misma una forma Era Sara Shenirer, la fundadora del de mejorar sus acciones. movimiento Beit Yaakov. La Sra. Shenirer Hay otra sección de la Torá en la cual era una mujer normal que vivió en una época aprendemos una lección más poderosa aún en la que no había educación formal para las sobre el poder del deseo de las matriarcas jóvenes judías. Consecuentemente, las de construir la nación judía. La Torá nos jóvenes judías de las familias observantes cuenta que, después de que Lea tuvo cuatro estaban alejándose de la Torá por montones. hijos, dejó de dar a luz. Sin embargo, ella no La dimensión de esta tragedia se vio interrumpió sus esfuerzos por tener más acentuada por el hecho de que, dada la falta hijos5. Incluso estuvo dispuesta a darle los de mujeres idóneas, muchos eruditos de dudaim6 de su hijo a su hermana Rajel a Torá no lograban encontrar una pareja cambio de otra oportunidad para tener más adecuada. No es exagerado decir que el hijos. Después de estos intensos esfuerzos, futuro del pueblo judío corría gran peligro. la Torá escribe: “Y Di-s oyó (vaishmá) a Lea, Sara Shenirer reconoció la amenaza y fundó quedó embarazada y le dio un quinto hijo a 7 la primera red de escuelas de Torá para Yaakov ”. Los comentaristas notan que no mujeres, conocidas hoy como Beit Yaakov. hay ninguna mención de que Lea haya rezado para tener más hijos. ¿Entonces por Con la guía de grandes rabinos como el qué la Torá dice que Di-s la oyó? ¡Lea no Jafetz Jaím y el Rebe de Ger, tuvo un éxito dijo nada! Rashi explica que, en este sentido, que superó sus más descabelladas la palabra vaishmá se refiere a percibir: “Di-s expectativas y logró asegurar el futuro de la percibió que Lea deseaba y luchaba para observancia judía. Entonces, cuando Rav crear más tribus y, como resultado de ese Sarna le reveló a la audiencia la identidad de deseo, Él le concedió otro hijo8”. esta salvadora del pueblo judío, todos Aprendemos de aquí que Di-s sí puede concordaron unánimemente con su responder a un intenso deseo espiritual que afirmación de que ella había hecho más por es acompañado por un gran esfuerzo, el pueblo judío que todos los presentes9. incluso cuando una persona no reza por ello. ¿Cómo tuvo el mérito de hacer algo tan Estos ejemplos demuestran la importancia de grande? Rav Sarna explicó que fue porque desarrollar un intenso deseo por crecer en ella estaba dispuesta a llorar por las jóvenes temas espirituales. Una persona no puede judías que estaban alejándose de la nación lograr nada importante en el ámbito espiritual judía10. El dolor que sentía por la destrucción sin este deseo. espiritual que estaba ocurriendo y su deseo por mejorar la situación fueron la clave de su La siguiente historia es un excelente ejemplo ímpetu para salvarlas. Es más, pareciera sobre la importancia del deseo y la voluntad obvio que Di-s oyó su intenso deseo de para alcanzar grandes logros en el ámbito mejorar la situación y le dio mucha siata espiritual. Una vez hubo una reunión de dishmaia (ayuda Celestial) en todos sus muchos de los grandes rabinos de la esfuerzos. generación y de los descendientes de los líderes de la generación anterior, incluyendo Una persona puede vivir su vida hasta cierto al Jafetz Jaim. Rav Iejézquel Sarna, el punto en una especie de piloto automático; granDi-so Rosh Yeshivá de Hebrón, se paró es decir, avanzar por la vida sin tener ningún para hablar y sorprendió a todos al decir que deseo de lograr verdadera grandeza había una persona que había logrado más espiritual. Aprendemos de las matriarcas que por el pueblo judío que todos los que estaban la única forma de alcanzar la grandeza es allí presentes, incluyendo a sus ilustres desarrollar un fuerte deseo en el ámbito antepasados. Es más, afirmó con seguridad espiritual y actuar para materializarlo. Di-s que una vez que les dijera de quien se quiera que todos nosotros ameritemos

בס''ד emular a las matriarcas y alcanzar la 5) Vaietzé 29:35. 6) Son un tipo de hierba a la que verdadera grandeza. se le atribuye la capacidad de aumentar la fertilidad. 7) Vaietzé 30:17. 8) Rashi, ibíd. Cf. Sforno y Or HaJáim que escriben que Lea sí rezó para tener más 1) Vaieitzé 30:22-24. 2) Es cierto que también le hijos. 9) Lo escuché de Rav Nóaj Weinberg, de agradeció a Hashem por quitarle el oprobio, pero bendita memoria. 10) “Seis milenios de grandes igualmente su pedido de más hijos debe ser líderes”, p. 217-218.

entendido. 3) Vaietzé 30:1. 4) Esta pregunta la hace el Beer Yosef, Rav Yosef Salant, en Parashat Vaietzé.

NAHALOT

Hadayah, could be traced back to Rav Saadyah Nahala of Rav Isser Zalman Gaon. Rav Shalom's mother, Rebbetzin Sabatyah, th Meltzer Sunday the 10 of Kislev was the grand-daughter of Rav Yitzchak Attiah, author of the Zera Yitzchak. Reb Shalom’s father Rav Isser Zalman Meltzer (1870-1954), author of passed away when he was only three. At the age of Even HaEzel, rosh yeshiva of Slutsk and Eitz 20, he married Sarah, the daughter of Rav Yitzchak Chaim-Yerushalayim, disciple of Netziv, Rav Chaim Labaton, one of the most outstanding rabbanim and Soloveitchik, and the Chafetz Chaim. Father-in-law dayanim of Aram Tzova. When Rav Yitzchak moved of Rav Aharon Kotler, and uncle of Rav Shach.His to Eretz Yisrael in 1888, he took Rav Shalom and wife was descended from Rav Meir Eisenstadt, his family with him. In 1891, Rav Shalom had to author of Ponim Meiros. Both Rav Isser Zalman return to Aram Tzova. While there, he was stricken Meltzer and Rav Moshe Mordechai married with an eye ailment and nearly lost his eyesight. daughters of Reb Shraga Frank, one of the Despite that, he wrote a sefer, Shalom LaAm, which wealthiest men in Kovno, and in whose attic Rav focuses on the issues of doing tzedakah and Yisrael Salanter began teaching mussar to Rav chessed, particularly on behalf of Torah students Nosson Tzvi Finkel and Rav Yitzchak Blazer. and scholars. In 1896, Rav Shalom moved to Eretz Yisrael permanently, first settling in the Bucharian Quarter, then moving to the Ohel Moshe Nahala of The Maharshal neighborhood. In 1904, Rav Shalom was appointed th moreh tzedek in the Bet din of Rav Vidal Anjel and Tuesday the 12 of Kislev Rav Baruch Elnekavah. In 1930, he was appointed raavad (rosh av Bet din) of all the Sephardic Rav Shlomo Luria Ashkenazi, the Maharshal (1510- communities in Yerushalayim. In 1927, 1574) of Lublin; author of the Yam Shel Shlomo, a Yerushalayim's chief kabbalist, and rosh yeshivah halachic commentary on 16 tractates of the Talmud of Bet Keil, Rav Mas'ud HaKohen Elchaded, passed (only 7 of which are still extant). His Chochmas away and Rav Shalom was appointed his Shlomo, glosses on the text of the Talmud and successor. Besides Shalom LaAm, the other comments, is printed in the standard editions of the sefarim Rav Shalom wrote were: Dover Shalom, Talmud. responsa on the Arba Turim; HaChaim v'HaShalom, a series of Torah extrapolations; and Shalom v'Tzedek. His son, Rav Ovadyah, was a prominent Nahala of Rav Shalom Hodaya rosh mesivta in the Porat Yosef yeshivah. When the th Jordanians conquered the Old City, Yeshivas Bet Wednesday the 13 of Kislev Keil was destroyed and Rav Ovadyah reestablished Rav Shalom Hadayah of Aram Tzova (1864-1944). it in his own home in the new city. After the Six-Day The lineage of his father, Rav Moshe Chaim War, he reestablished the yeshivah in the Old City.

בס''ד