Pregnant Man?: a Conversation Darren Rosenblum Pace University School of Law, [email protected]
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Pace University DigitalCommons@Pace Pace Law Faculty Publications School of Law 2010 Pregnant Man?: A Conversation Darren Rosenblum Pace University School of Law, [email protected] Noa Ben-Asher Pace University School of Law, [email protected] Follow this and additional works at: http://digitalcommons.pace.edu/lawfaculty Part of the Family Law Commons, and the Sexuality and the Law Commons Recommended Citation Darren Rosenblum et al., Pregnant Man?: A Conversation, 22 Yale J.L. & Feminism 207 (2010), available at http://digitalcommons.pace.edu/lawfaculty/757/. This Article is brought to you for free and open access by the School of Law at DigitalCommons@Pace. It has been accepted for inclusion in Pace Law Faculty Publications by an authorized administrator of DigitalCommons@Pace. For more information, please contact [email protected]. Pregnant Man?: A Conversation i Darren Rosenblum'Rosenblum with Noa Ben-Asher,iiBen-Asher," Mary Anne Case,iiiCase,"' Elizabeth Emens,"vEmens,iv Berta E. Hemandez-Truyol,VHernindez-Truyol,v Vivian M. Gutierrez,'Gutierrez,vi Lisa C. Ikemoto,v"Ikemoto,Vii Angela Onwuachi-Willig,""Onwuachi-Willig,viii Jacob Willig-Onwuachi,xWillig-Onwuachi,ix Kimberly Mutcherson,x Peter Siegelman,xi and xii Beth JonesJonesxii PROLOGUE ................................................................................................................................................................. 208 Pregnant Man? ................................................................................................................... ...... 209 A. Gestational Surrogacy v. Adoption ................................................................... 209 B. Egg Shopping ....................................................................................................... .............. 211 C. Meet Your "Baby Mama" ..................................................................................... 213 D. Retrieval, Orgasm, and Fertilization in Connecticut....................214ConnecticuL .................. 214 E. Mother/Father/ParentMotherlFatherlParent .......................................................................................... ..... 215 F. Conclusion!Conclusion/ Homonormative Parenting? ...................................... .... 216 BABy-MAKINGBABY-MAKING AND MEANING-MAKING: THE Two TRIANGLES OF REPRODUCTIVE TECHNOLOGY ....................................................................................... 217 AMAZONAMAZONORETANA? OR ETANA? ................................................................................................................................... 220 LAW'sNATURELAW'S NATURE ....................................................................................................................................... ......... 227 UNSEXING PREGNANCY? ........................................................................................................... ..... .. .... .. .. 230 FRIENDS OF THE PREGNANT MAN ............................................................................................. ......... 236 The Pregnant Man and the Dream of Family ................................................. ..... 236 "Octomom" ...................................................................................................................... ...... 238 The Ghosts in the Machine............................241Machine .................................................................. 241 ALL IN THE FAMILY..............................................FAMILy ......................................................................................... 242 Introduction ......................................................................................................................... ...... 242 A. "Optimal" Mothers (and Fathers) .................................................................. ..... 243 i.i. Professor of Law, Pace Law School. ii. Assistant Professor of Law, Pace Law School. iii. Arnold I. Shure Professor of Law, University of Chicago Law School. iv. Professor of Law, Columbia Law School. v. Other-mom; Levin, Mabie & Levin Professor of Law, University of Florida Levin College of Law. vi. Birth-mom, Midwife, and Spanish teacher. vii. Professor of Law, University of CaliCalifornia, fomi a, Davis School of Law. viii. Professor of Law, Charles M. and Marion 1.J. Kierscht Scholar, University ofIowaof Iowa College of Law. ix. Assistant Professor of Physics, Grinnell College. x. Associate Professor of Law, Rutgers-Camden School of Law. xi. Roger Sherman Professor of Law, University of Connecticut School of Law. xii. Surrogate. Copyright ©Q 2010 by the Yale Journal of Law and Feminism HeinOnline -- 22 Yale J.L. & Feminism 207 2010 208 Yale Journal of Law and Feminism [Vol. 22:2 B. Racial Constitutions..............................245Constitutions ....................................................................... 245 WHAT'S LOVE GOT To Do WITHWITH ITIT?9 .............................................................. 249249 COMMENTS ON PREGNANT MAN.................MAN ..................................................................... ............ 255 255 MUTUALMUTUAL EXPLOITATION, A RESPONSE...............................257RESPONSE ........................................................... 257 EPILOGUE AND RESPONSERESPONSE.........................................260 ............................................................................... 260 A. Markets......................................262Markets .......................................................................................... 262 1. Contracts..................................262Contracts ................................................................................ 262 2. "Choice" and Exploitation.......................262Exploitation ..................................................... 262 3. Labor ofofLove? Love?...... ............................................................................. .. ..... ...... 264 264 4. Protecting SurrogatesSurrogates..........................266 ............................................................. 266 B. Identity.......................................267Identity ........................................................................................... 267 1. Gendered Parenthood...............Parenthood ............................................................. ........... 267 2. Homophobia: Identity as thethe PredatorPredator. ....................................................... 271 3. Choosing and Constructing Melina's Identities: Race, Gender, Culture ............................................................................................................. 273 4. Social Biology ............................................................................................. ................ 276 Conclusion................................................278Conclusion ........................................................................................... 278 PROLOGUE Darren Rosenblum I'm a lawlaw professor who works on gender, sexuality, and culture in the international and comparative context. That's my head working. In "real" life, my partner, Howard, and I have been engaged in having a baby together for several years, a project that came to fruition with the birth of our daughter Melina. Of course, such a project evokes intensely complex feelings and thoughts. Beyond a simple transposition of the personal onto thethe political, I feel so fortunate to have engaged in myriad conversations with a variety of friends and colleagues who think much more carefully about the family and different aspects of race,race, class, gender, and sexuality than I do. Fascinating conversations also arose with people who work in thethe less clearly related fields of administrative law,law, law and economics, public international law, internationalinternational commercial law, and lawlaw and psychology. These conversations have reshaped my understanding of the boundaries among self, family, and society, and have given me a faith inin our profession that, despite the hierarchies and occasional pettiness, we lawlaw professors are a warm and supportivesupportive bunch. As Howard and I awaited the birth of our child, I wrote down some of my thoughtsthoughts on these conversations to memorialize them soso thatthat others could share them.them. Scholarship abounds on parenting and families:families: surrogacy, in-vitroin-vitro HeinOnline -- 22 Yale J.L. & Feminism 208 2010 2010] Pregnant Man?: A Conversation 209 fertilization and otherother reproductive technologies,technologies, gay parenting,parenting, thethe economicseconomics of families, and so on-studieson-studies which can andand did inform our process. II wrote this shortshort essay in thethe middle of ourour gestational surrogate's pregnancy toto remind myself of thethe many amazing theoreticaltheoretical discussionsdiscussions I've had over thethe past couple of years as my partner and I worked to become parents. At first,ftrst, I was far tootoo reluctant toto attach to the fetus as if itit were our baby, so much so that we referredreferred to it as "Cletus thethe Fetus," and then, at thethe suggestion ofofa a friend (who(who noted that "Cletus" was a boy's name), as "Cledith or Cletus" during thethe pregnancy. Now that I'm sitting fiveftve feet from our daughter Melina, I feel safer opening this chapter of our liveslives to others. Pregnant Man? Man? I'm pregnant. No, I can't say that-a person with