THE ETRIEVER

"Procrastination gives you something to look forward to."- Joan Konner, Journalist Volume XXXV, Number 28 1000 Hilltop Circle, Baltimore, MD 21250 · May 8, 2001 Cone Collection Version 2.0 Baltimore Museum of Art and UMBC Visual Arts Department Develop Virtual Tour of Exhibit

SARAH ANDREWS Retriever Weekly Editorial Staff ing with newly designed galleries ing to Alan Price, associate direc­ and expanded exhibition space. tor of the IRC, was the extent of The Baltimore Museum of Claribel and Etta Cone began research that had to be done to Art's famed Cone Collection their collecting career in the recreate the apartments. The received a technological upgrade 1890s, and eventually acquired building had been gutted in the recently, thanks to an ongoing hundreds of works by such artists 1970s, forcing the team to tum to collaboration with UMBC's as Renoir, Manet, Cezanne, the building's original floor plans Imaging Research Center. Degas and Matisse. Today the and over 30 photographs of the Through internships with the Cone Collection, containing over apartment to guide them in recre­ IRC, which is part of the Visual 500 works by Henri Matisse ating the rooms. The team spent Arts department, artistically and alone, is considered one of the six months recreating the apart­ technically-minded students have most important in the world. ments' details, even creating digi­ had the chance to flex their cre­ Now, through real-time computer tal images of the artwork and fur­ ative and technical muscles by animation developed by the niture in the rooms. Museum vis­ designing a virtual tour of the UMBC team, museum visitors itors will be able to look out the Cone sisters' art-filled Baltimore can explore a virtual re-creation virtual windows and see a recre­ apartments. of the sisters' home and see some ation of the view seen in the orig­ The first phase of the project, of their extensive art collection as inal photographs. Henri Matisse I Courtesy of the BMA Virtual Art: Henri Matisse's Purple Robe and Anemons is one a digital recreation of the Eutaw they originally displayed it. of the thousands of paintings on display as part of the Cone Place apartments, opened in April One of the virtual tour pro­ Collection at the Baltimore Museum of Art. as part of the collection's reopen- ject's greatest challenges, accord- see CONE, page 2 Horowitz Ad Sparks Discussion at UMBC, Protest Elsewhere

DAHLIA NAQIB the ad caused four Retriever staff Chief Jennifer Schildroth and Retriever Weekly Staff Writer members to withdraw their names Managing Editor Adam from the April 24 in which the ad Craigmiles. Debate on campus, spurred by ran. In a letter to the editor in the "As a black student and a an ad in The same issue, advertis- black male, I was offended that Retriever Weekly " • ing manager Brett my campus newspaper printed listing reasons why What was evident McKenzie wrote "I such an ad," said Se~ior Rajj African Americans from the forum feel that it is wrong Stewart. "I wasn't given any justi­ are no~ entitled to was that we need to p~nt an advertise­ fication as to why the newspaper reparations for slav- ment that so [bla- ran it." ery, angered and more opportunities tantly] expresses The Retriever staff struggled confused students for students to somebody's opinion just as the staff members at other who voiced con- • . .. [and] that could student newspapers had between cerns at a forum learn across differ- be very hurtful to free speech and offensive materi­ hosted by The ence." -Assistant many people." al and concluded that, although Retriever. "IT." - p id fi Students at the ad was offensive, it was clear­ · The ad , run by yzce res ent or UMBC d.d1 no t reac t ly an opinion and not a nonfactu­ David Horowitz, Student Affairs with vandalism, but al statement that would have been incited students on Jamie Washington instead with words rejected according to the Nate West I Retriever Weekly Staff other campuses in . at the forum, which Retriever's advertisement criteria. Pistahantastic: www.pistahan2001.com, UMBC's Filipino California and at seated on a panel "We promote ourselves as an American Student Association's annual cultural show was Brown University to protest and UMB law professor Mike held in the UC Ballroom last Friday. See page 15. steal copies of the student paper.. Meyerson, sociology professor At UMBC, the decision to run Fred Pincus, Retriever Editor in see HOROWITZ page 3

UJ.------~------~------+------~ and Emily Bernstein fills up on Filipino money, or at championship while Q argue the merits of culture, Brett least learn all women's lacrosse running the McKenzie chats with about it in this loses in the NEC Reparations ad while Colin Quinn and finals: Baseball -CD Matt VanDyke discuss­ Susan Harris reviews heads into confer­ es Bush's potential the Maryland Film ence play while soft­ 2 Festival ball is eliminated. - College News ..... p. 2 World News .... p. 3 Classifieds ••• p. 35 PAGE2 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY NEWS May 8, 2001 ehind the Scenes

from college these days and chances are Ryan Bos: Watching Over the you'll get more than a diploma. Hundreds Residential Hall's North, South and West Wings of schools now offer lifetime e-mail addresses for alums. mold the minds of the next generation Get an alum.swarthmore.edu address if SCOTI DAUGHERTY of college students. you've graduated from Swarthmore Retriever Weekly Editorial Staff Residential halls, the turf of a com­ College. The University of Pennsylvania munity director, are not always bustling offers alumni.upenn.edu, while California's Do you watch NBC's presidential with that next generation of college stu­ Harvey Mudd College gives out drama, The West Wing? Do you find dents though. UMBC on the weekend is alumni.hmc.edu addresses to graduates. the political story lines, ripped from the still much more active than UMBC in Michael Fordice, a biotech consultant headlines, riveting? Do you sometimes the middle of summer when nD resi­ who received his Ph.D. in chemistry from notice the blurry profile of a 20-some­ dents are living on campus and his MIT in 1966, considers his alumni address thing male in a non-descript suit stand­ duties consist mainly of planning for "a subtle resume." ing in the background and think he the next years orientation two months "If you have an alum.mit.edu address, looks strangely familiar? It's doubtful, away. Bos is primarily left to himself people know right away you're an MIT but if you do, it may be Ryan Bos, for the summer and winter sessions, the grad," said Maggy Bruzelius, the school's Community Director of Susquehanna only other residents being diligent stu­ director of alumni network services. "That Residential Hall. dents or participants in conferences in should be a pretty powerful tool." Bos is not giving up his day job for which he has no control or duties. With a few exceptions, schools don't a career in acting; his interests in pro­ During his free time, Bos likes to directly provide mail services. Alums must fessional drama are more as a hobby work out both in the gym and in the get their mail accounts elsewhere. and vehicle for social change than as clubs. He takes full advantage of the Messages sent to the alumni address are his next step. "Getting involved in the Retriever Activities Center, working out simply forwarded. acting arena would only be to further Nate West I Retriever Weekly Staff almost every day, and hits the clubs Unlike other promotional services, such my work towards social justice and almost every Saturday night. as credit cards, schools get no income from community development," he said. ization dedicated to personal and commu­ e-mail forwarding, which can cost thou­ Social justice and community devel­ nity growth. He would like to stay on the sands of dollars to run. opment truly are what Bos lives for. UMBC campus though and continue his Some schools do not offer e-mail for­ The community director received his work in the same environment. "UMBC is Quick Questions warding to alums at all, finding they would undergraduate degree in Social Work at a transitional point, at its next big mile­ What is your favorite dance club? rather devote limited resources to current before receiving his Masters degree in stone, where the university will change "I don~t have a favorite because students and faculty. But that attitude is Student Personnel Administration from from a primarily commuter school to a depending on my mood, I prefer to go changing, and many schools have added Ball State University. After complete­ residential campus," said Bos. different places. The Hippo in Baltimore such services in the past year or two, some­ ing his graduate degree, Bos moved Bos did not always aspire to become a is more low-k~y and friendly and times at the request of alums. onto his current position at UMBC in Residential Community Director or includes a very mixed crowd with good the summer of 1998. University Social Administrator. music. I enjoy a couple different dance Ohio State U. policy creates Bos sees himself as "an individual Between high school and college he con­ clubs in DC, one being Velvet Nation party restrictions who is passionate about many things, templated the extremes of business because of the large venue and another COLUMBUS, Ohio (U-WIRE) - A zero­ from learning, to growing, to helping administration and high school social place called Lizard Lounge because they tolerance policy has been instituted to stop bring people together for better under­ work. He also contemplated law school play excellent music and is more of a out-of-control parties in the off-campus standings." and the entrepreneurial venture of creat­ New :York atmosphere. " area of Ohio State University, and it will However, Bos' tenure at UMBC is ing his own non-profit organization; the result in immediate suspension for party coming to an end this year. Typically, hosts. dream he is still working towards today. Who is your favorite character in the Last Wednesday, the Council of Student the community director position is a According to Bos, a community direc­ West Wing? Affairs voted to endorse six strategies out­ stepping stone position individuals only tor's purpose is "to facilitate, empower ."CJ'' lined by the Office of Student Affairs. The fill for three to four years before mov­ and support the community," and that is strategies were developed by Bill Hall, ing on to other university positions. what he wanted to do as his undergradu­ Do you llave any pofttical aspirations interim vice president for Student Affairs, What's next? Bos doesn't know. He ate collegiate career came to an end. The to further· your beliefs on social with input from the Office of Legal Affairs. has applied for other student affairs career choice would mean graduate change? The strategy includes suspending hosts of positions at UMBC, and is working on school, leadership and the chance to be on ''Yes~ I.~.my~lfrurming for public large parties, strongly discouraging any developing a national non-profit organ- the forefront of social change, helping office at s()me pOint in my lifetime." lawn parties and stressing that ignoring a police order to disperse from an area is a violation of Columbus laws and will result in arrests. A party will be considered out of control if hosts or guests engage in immediately Imaging Research Center Gains dangerous, destructive riot behavior. "The behavior has become increasingly worse, and the concern is that, before long, Recognition with Artistic Venture serious injuries will occur," said Hall. "The policy is in a wait and see stage. If over the from CONE, page 1 ing between IRC and museum officials with a client,. on a deadline,." Price said_ next few weeks the off-campus area shows that took place last summer at the sugges­ Over the course of two semesters about that the problems are stopping, we will then The project's technical aspects posed tion of UMBC President Freeman 20 student interns and several graduate see if it is still necessary to have the policy," an additional challenge, Price said. assistants worked on the Cone Virtual Hall said. Hrabowski. Hrabowski knew that the "If you want to kick back and have a Working on a tight budget, the team museum was looking for ways to incorpo­ Tour. barbecue and a few cold ones with friends developed a custom system using new rate more technology into their displays, The project's second phase will add that's no problem. A few kegs will be a animation software and multiple PC's net­ Price said, and the virtual tour emerged as interpretive elements to the tour, includ­ problem," he said. "Anyone holding an out­ worked together, rather than using a single a possible collaborative project. ing critical essays, and letters and other door party should be aware that they are multi-million dollar super computer. In addition to giving students experi­ materials from the BMA' s Cone assuming a high risk, and they will be The integration of artistic design con­ ence in their particular areas of artistic or Archives. Later phases might include viewed as adding to an already dangerous cepts and technology made the Cone technical interest, working on a project expanding the tour to a website or CD­ situation." Virtual Tour a perfect project for the IRC, like this one presents an "opportunity to ROM, Price said, but those expansions Price said. The project grew out of a meet- work on a professional project as a team, are not yet definite. THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY NEWS May 8, 2001 PAGE3

movement, registered Friday to run the June presidential election and prom­ to continue social and political reforms elected for another four-year term. The hugely popular Khatami is widely expected to soundly defeat any opponent. There had been some doubts about whether he would run for re-election, and he had been silent about his intentions before Friday. Khatami, 58, arrived at the Ministry registration office in Tehran a 11:30 a.m. to fill out an application form. "I have come to run and I have faithful to my commitment and to my peo­ ple and my principles," Khatami told reporters, calling democracy, "the most lirrmortrutlt desire and demand of our nation." At least 140 people have registered for the June 8 election, including at least two women. The registration ended Sunday. To qualify, candidates must be involved politics or religion, of Iranian origin, and "faithful to the cause of the

u.,l,lll1.L'-' Republic." All candidates are vetted the Guardian Council, a hard-line body that is expected to disqualify many of the "~n·'"'·-·~ reformists. . The poll is shaping up as a Thanks to you, all sorts of everyday Horowitz Ad Causes Sparring between reformists and hard-liners, who products are beinq made from the lost control of parliament in last year's elec­ paper. plasHc, metal and glass that tions. from HOROWIIZ page 1 talk to the community, but the community • you've been recycling. has to talk back," said Schildroth. US Team Inspects Missionary Plane B_ut to keep recycling- working to unbiased forum and ... the same principles But those opposed to the ad also 1 help protect the environment, you. IQUITOS, Peru (AP) - Torrential we apply to opinionated content are the argued that the advertisement criteria poured down as U.S. and Peruvian in need to buy those products. same principles we apply to opinionated have not been consistent. The Retriever. gators inspected the charred wreckage of ads, which is largely uninhibited discus- has agreed to "reevaluate the policy to American missionary plane downed las BUY RECYCLED~ sion," said Schildroth. Staff members ensure consistency" in the future. month by Peru's air force, killing a U.S. thought that although his words were The anger and confusion surrounding woman and her baby. offensive, Horowitz also had a right to free the ad has also led to discussion in and out Riddled with bullet holes, mostly in the speech. of classrooms. fuselage and pontoons, the plane sat "There is no legal reason for them to "What was evident from the forum Thursday propped on a floating, open-air include it, but there may be an ethical rea- was that we need more opportunities for along a tributary of the Amazon son for them not to," said Meyerson. But, students to learn across difference," said here, 620 miles northeast of the capi­ he said, the Retriever was not wrong in Assistant Vice President for Student , Lima. running the ad although it Affairs Jamie Washington Portions of both wings were ~elted and would have bee,n better if the " , • Stewart appreciated the agged and the interior was completely gut­ editors had clearly announced We re workzng forum, but thought the ted from fue. their position opposing the ad now to educate Retriever didn't handle the sen- A U.S. delegation, led by AND SAVE: in an editorial. l t ·d sitivities of the issue well Secretary of State Rand Beers and accom- "In a battle agamst. rac1sm . peop e ou• sz e enough . "I t h. m k It· , s grea t th a t by at least four Peruvian air So look for and" buy products made or hatred, neutrality isn't nee- the Retriever. you present a forum, but you officers, spent 40 minutes examining the from recycled materials. And don't for"" essarily a virtue," said It's never come need to discuss the issues single-engine Cessna, which a Peruvian get to celebrate Ameri.ca Recydes Day Meyerson, who described the , revolving around it," said force jet mistook for a drug smuggling on November 15th. ad as "·evil" because it was up before now. Stewart, who suggested dedi­ and shot down on April 20. Missionary Veronica "Roni" Bowers, 35, It would mean the world to us. For a very "subtle in its claim." Junior eating a Point/Counterpoint in and her 7-month-old daughter, Charity, free brochure, calll-800-CALL-EDfor "They imply .much more I d e S h a the Opinion section to the issue, than they infer," said which the Retriever has done killed by a single bullet when the jet fired Vi.sit ou.r web site at \VWW.edf.org Meyerson. Hardcastle with this issue. the Cessna. Bowers' husband, Jim, 38, and their 6- The subtlety of the ad's The black community year-old son, Cory, survived the attack\' ith­ claim was something the Retriever recog- on campus has mobilized as a result of the OEB'. BJF out serious injury. The pilot, missionary I m ® nized and so after the decision to run the ad and is working to address those issues Kevin Donaldson, 42, although seriously :J!•a•~·i"~~-·~•..,...•• ad was made, representatives of the paper about reparations it brought up. "We're injured, was able to crash-land the plane on met with administrators and the president working now to educate people outside the Amazon. of the Black Student Union to explain the Retriever. It's never come up before U.S. officials have said an American sur­ why the Retriever had decided to run the until now," said Junior Idesha Hardcastle. veillance plane manned by a CIA-contract­ ad. This emergence of ideas is a reason crew alert~d Peru's air force to the mis­ The ad was held for two weeks to give why Professor Pincus supports running plane's presence. opponents- a chance to assemble a the ad. "They ought to run an ad like that, ~ending the outcome of the investiga­ response in the same issue in which the ad but they out to give people an opportuni- . on, Washington has suspended a 9-year was printed, but, Schildroth said, the ty to respond," said Pincus, who special- oint air interdiction program with Peru to paper had not received any ads or letters izes in race relations. "Make your paper or shoot down suspected drug flights to the editor in opposition to the ad. an open forum- truth emerges out of the the area. "We're willing to discuss things and competition of ideas." PAGE4 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY NEWS May 8, 2001 Professors' Contribution to the Internet Recognized CWIT Offers Women Technological Alternative to Beauty Tips and Horoscopes

ROBERT REDDING efforts have focused on simply providing Retriever Weekly Staff Writer resources for women. The CWIT website has extensive news Dr. Joan Korenman was named one of about women and IT, women-related sci­ the "Top Twenty-Five Women on the Web" ence/technology email lists and announce­ by the San Francisco Women on the Web ments of jobs among others ·resources. for her work as Director of the Center for The site was also called "the best Women and Information Technology web­ women's resource site online" by site. ABCnews.com. SF WoW is a nonprofit group "commit­ Korenman feels that the communica­ ted to serve, educate and empower its mem­ tion over email is one of the most impor­ bers in the Internet and new media indus­ tant uses of a website. "You don't have to tries," according to the organization's web­ be a knowledgeable IT expert to do site. email," said Korenman. Nearly ten years The award has already given CWIT ago she started an email list Women's more name recognition. Korenman says Studies research and program administra­ she recently received an email from the tion, allowing communication all over the host of an Australian radio show who want­ world at anytime. WMST-L is now the ed _to interview her about the site. largest women related academic list in the Korenman said she was "stunned" when world, according to Korenman. she first received notification of the award. In 1993, while she was director of the Appropriately, the notification came Women's Studies program at UMBC, through email. Donna Dubinsky, co­ Korenman created a "gopher site" for the founder and CEO of Handspring, was program at the urging of Jack Suess. The another one of this year's winners and gopher site became a website with Nate West I Retriever Weekly Staff Carly Fiorina, president and CEO of resources for women "that spanned the Woman on the Web: Dr. Joan Korenman, director of CWIT, was named one of Hewlett Packard, was one of last year's whole realm of subject areas," Korenman the ''Top Twenty-Five Women on the Web." winners. said. There were sixteen categories of Though she realizes she has con­ information ranging from activism to engine most often results in pornography such as these give the impression that a tributed to the web, Korenman said, "as an women's health. sites as the top hits. woman's top concerns should be dieting, English professor running a Center for Korenman started CWIT in 1998 to Other then pornography, Korenman beauty tips, horoscopes and how to hold Women and Information Technology, I'm · address problems she saw in the under also highlighted the existence of huge por­ on to a man. kind of used to the impostor role." She representation of women as IT profession­ tal sites like Women.com and ivillage.com Korenman is concerned that the finds it interesting that she is now being als, and as users. Though she says that on the Internet. "Frankly, they remind me emphasis on such information may have a associated with industry heavyweights. more women are on the Internet now, of the old women's magazines from the negative impact on younger generations. Since SF WoW primarily recognizes research on women's online experiences 1950s," said Korenman. While CWIT She said, "I would hate to think that that's those in the IT field, Korenman said she needs to be done. She pointed out that typ­ deals with enabling women to use tech­ what the new generation will see as what was especially surprised because her ing "women" or "girls" into a search nology comfortably, she believes that sites it means to be a woman."

4 out of 5 UMBC students dri¥8 S0b8r. • * based on the CORE Alcohol and Drug Survey, Spring 2000 'fiRS' University Health Services (41 0) 455-2542 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY NEWS May 8, 2001 PAGES POLICE LOG carroll community college

Theft from Building identified through investigation and April 24, 2:28 p.m. - A UMBC stu­ charges are pending the completion of dent reported the theft of her ATM the investigation. Debit Card from her wallet that was in her purse in the Social Sciences Assault Building. The investigation is continu­ April28, 9:30p.m. -A UMBC studen~ ing. Photographs of the suspect have reported that he was talking to a friend been located. in the Elk Apartments about racism when he got into an argument with Theft from Building another student who then punched him April 24, 10:40 p.m. - A student in the mouth. The case is closed. The employee of UMBC's Audiovisual student who performed the assault was Services Department, reported the theft issued a Student Conduct Notice. of a Video Data Projector, the property of UMBC, taken from an audiovisual Destruction of Property cart while inside Lecture Hall V. The April 28, 10:03 p.m. - A UMBC Jump start next year's coursework! data projector is valued at $4,100. The employee reported that there were five Earn three credits in only five weeks! investigation revealed the projector and broken bulletin boards in Erickson Hall-. Short, extended, and internet formats give you maximum stand were left unattended in LH V. Investigation by police identified an flexibility to combine a summer job and study! There are no identified suspects in the Erickson Hall resident student as a sus­ case. The investigation is continuing. pect in the vandalism. The student Tuition is only $75 per credit hour*(Carroll County residents) responded to the UMBC Police Theft from Building Department on April 30 where he con­ Carroll credits transfer! April 25, 8:25p.m.- A UMBC stu­ fessed to the vandalism. The student has Sun1n1er I classes beginJune 4 dent reported that someone removed agreed to replace the vandalized proper­ Sun1n1er II classes beginJuly 9 his credit card and $155 in currency ty. The student was issued a Student from his book bag while he slept in the Conduct Notice. Physics Building. The preliminary Walk in and register... investigation failed to identify witness­ Assault Mon -Thurs: 9 a.m.-7 p.m. Fridays: 9 a.m.- 4 p.m. ~{f es or suspects. Further investigative April 28, 7:14 p.m. - A non-student efforts revealed that someone used the was attending the Quadmania activities Admissions & Advising ~'coLLEGE stolen credit card to make one purchase when an unknown individual came up 1601 Washington Road and attempted to use the card to make to hi.n4 knocked him to the ground and 41 0-386-8435 Westminster, MD 21157 another. The investigation will contin­ kicked him in the face. The victim was www.carrollcc.com ue. first treated at the scene and then trans­ ported to the hospital for further treat­ Assault ment. The investigation is continuing. April 28, 1: 18 a.m. -A UMBC student All involved were identified by Police assaulted a Trident Security Officer and were issued Student Conduct during an event at the University Notices. Criminal charges are pending Center Ballroom. Richard Giddens, 21, the cooperation of the victim. of E. 15th St., Huntington Station, NY was charged with Assault. According to Destruction of Property allegations by Trident Security Officer, April 30, 11:15 a.m. - A UMBC stu­ the student struck him in the left rear dent reported that someone broke the portion of his jaw when he attempted to rear sliding glass window in his pick-up calm him down during a disturbance. truck while it was parked and unattend­ The student denied striking the security ed on Inner Hilltop Circle. There are no officer and alleges an unidentified identified suspects in this case. The Spend member of Trident Security assaulted investigation is continuing. him. The security officer prepared the proper paperwork and submitted it to Theft from Vehicle the District Court Commissioner. April 30, 7:43 a.m. -A UMBC student reported the theft of one Maryland vehi­ Destruction of Property cle registration plate from a vehicle Apri128, 4:44 a.m. -A UMBC student parked in Lot 12. There are no identified reported that while his vehicle was suspects in this case. The investigation parked in Lot 6 it was surrounded by is continuing. with several members of the UMBC Men's Basketball Team who began kicking The information provided in the Police and striking his vehicle causing damage Log is courtesy of the UMBC Campus to the hood, driver's door, passenger Police. The Retriever Weekly takes no side window, and front right quarter responsibility for the infomation s valid­ Qle4ac out the schedule of cl.fJsses panel. Several individuals have been ity m11lled to your Anne Arundel County home.

v session 1 May :IJ·June 29 (6 weeks) May 23-July 15 (8 weeks) May 2J·A•I· t (ts weeks) session a June t8·Aua. 12 (8 weeks) session 3 July s-Aug.t.a {6 weeks) ' lfiiiP~ Anne ArundelSfrltltiiCs, Community College www.aacc.cc.md.us • .t..itJD•t'-•~r-7•a~D PAGE6 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY NEWS May 8, 2001 UMBC's New IdeaLab Is More than a Thought IdeaLab to Help Student Entrepreneurs' Business Dreams Take Flight

SCOTT DAUGHERTY first real idea. Emge and two others are in their respective developments; has research where they will be available to consult Retriever Weekly Editorial Staff the application stages. Levin believes that been performed, has competition exam­ with students and provide whatever interest will pick up over the summer ined, etc. From there the applicant directly advice they can on getting a business Darren Emge has an idea. He has sever­ break, when students are not as busy with applies to the IdeaLab, outlining his or her started. al ideas actually, but this Electrical the hectic schedules of college life. goals and objectives. Representatives from the financial Engineering graduate student has one idea firm of Tatum CFO Partners, the law firm that could make him rich. The problem is, of Piper Marbury Rudnick & Wolfe, LLP, he is great at developing ideas involving the venture capitalists Steve Walker & the intricacies of the electronic world, but Associates and American Express Tax has no idea how to market those ideas. That and Business Services are already sched­ is where UMBC's IdeaLab steps in; a new uled to staff the desk during the month of program started in February by the univer­ May. The advice coming from the help sity to help promising young technical stu­ desk, although free, could come at the dents to develop business plans. cost of one's idea. "Right now we are "The students who are thinking about a relying on the fact [that the help desk potential business opportunity will have a staffers] are all professionals in their place to work with mentors and advisors to fields ... with ethics binding them," Levin complete their plans and develop their said. Levin and others involved with the processes or products before actually IdeaLab are working on more formal launching their business," said Paul Levin, . safeguards to prevent the theft of a stu­ director of the UMBC Technology Center, dent's ideas. which the IdeaLab is apart of. Levin believes most of the projects The idea for the IdeaLab came from produced through the help of the IdeaLab Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, where will be funded through federal funds, in their RPideaLab is already encouraging the the form of Small Business Innovative institute's students to start businesses and Research Grants. Venture capital is still a take advantage of what has been a growing possibility however. economy. The UMBC IdeaLab has room for "This concept takes office-sharing to approximately five or six different proj­ new heights," said Bela Musits, director of Scott Daugherty I Retriever Weekly Staff ects to run concurrently, according to Rensselaer's Incubator Program. "We hope Idea Factory: The ldealab is located inside the UMBC Technology Center, which Levin. The development of the business the RPidea Lab will become ground zero UMBC acquired from Martin Marietta in the mid-1990s. plan is expected to take from two to six for students who otherwise might be trying months, depending on how far along the to operate businesses out of their residence The application process for the IdeaLab The functional purpose of the IdeaLab idea is when it is accepted into the pro­ hall rooms." is fairly informal, depending primarily on will primarily revolve around the develop­ gram. The UMBC IdeaLab is physically noth­ personal interviews and less on hard statis­ ment of business plans. Technology center Levin eventually hopes students who ing more than some old tables, some new tics. Acceptance into the IdeaLab does staff will help guide the entrepreneur-hope­ develop their business plans in the computers, a couple telephones, a confer­ require at least a sophomore standing in the fuls through defining their product, possi­ IdeaLab will be able to graduate into the ence table and a coffee pot in a renovated university, a minimum GPA of 2.50 and the ble customers, cost of its development, the UMBC Student Incubator program. The room in the South Campus Technology ability to meet monthly with selected busi­ estimated return on the product and how it Student Incubator program would be Center located off S. Rolling Road. This ness advisors to allow the lab to monitor will be funded. more formally managed, providing sepa­ shared office space does provide what a progress. If those requirements are met, The IdeaLab will also provide students rate office space at a nominal rent. fledgling business venture needs though, then an applicant meets with Levin and access with professionals in various fields At the moment however, Levin is and at no cost to the starving entrepreneurs. Patty Rippen, the Center's Business who can help the students in the develop­ interested in filing the IdeaLab. "Every The IdeaLab office space has yet to be Development Coordinator, to determine ment of a business plan. Specifically, idea is welcome. We look forward to officially used since the program lacks its where the idea and business plan are in these professionals will man a help desk working with students who are develop- Task Force Proposes Changes to GFR's JOANA GOMES DACRUZ graduate. "The current GFR curriculum mandatory. All students will also be hard time fulfilling the current GFR Retriever Weekly Staff Writer is not coherent. It's outdated and should required to complete a minor. requirements, and might not be able to fit be modified to help our students have The proposed new curriculum is the extra classes into their tight sched­ Future UMBC students may pursue more focused and useful requirements," based on changes recently adopted by ules. Students may have to come up with their university careers under updated he said. Duke University. more funding to pay for the extra time in graduation requirements if the Honors With that goal in mind, the task force Dr. Larry Lasher, who chaired the school to take the additional courses. Task Force's course requirements are has created a list of desirable character­ graduation requirements subcommittee At least one change may be in place approved adopted by the university. The istics for UMBC graduates. These char­ of the task force, explained that most by this fall, however. Johnson explained task force believes adding more specific acteristics, according to the 1999 Vision faculty members agree that the GFR that by the fall semester freshmen might course requirements to the General and Values Statement of the Planning requirements need modifications. be required to attend Success Seminars, Foundation Requirements will improve Leadership Committee, include technol­ However, the cost of acquiring addition­ focusing on things like time manage­ UMBC graduates and better define ogy literacy, effective communications al faculty and resources is a major con­ ment, choosing a major, career goals, UMBC as an honors university. The new and critical thinking skills. cern. and the value of research experience. requirements are also meant to enhance Specific course requirements will be The potential effects the changes may The major changes to the GFR sheet the connection between a liberal arts added to the GFR matrix to help students have on transfer students and students won't be happening for a while. The task education and the research university develop these characteristics. Students with already intensive majors are also force expects to continue discussing the environment. will be required to complete six credits causing concern. New transfers might changes through the summer and Fall Provost Art Johnson explained that of technology-enriched writing courses. not be able to complete all the require­ semester. the task force would like UMBC stu­ In addition, classes in technology, ments once they come to UMBC. Also, Additional information can be found dents to have certain qualities when they ethics, research and writing will become students with intensive majors have a at www. umbc. edu/provost. News is the Best Section in The Retriever Weekly: Write for it.

Contact Scott at X1260 or e-mail _o~ws@trw... u .mbc.edu. THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY NEWS May 8, 2001 PAGE?

May 14- 16 9:00- 3:30 9:00- 6:30 r::=::!====:======~~=- May 1 7 , 9:00- 3:30 23 9:00- 6:30 s~OKlid~~ ·May24~=~ ~~ - 9:00- 3:30 PAGES THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY NEWS May 8, 2001

,-II H ETRIEVER RWEci

Come to TlleRetrierer weetltsfunfest on the uc Plaza during free hour on Wednesdav 5/9 to win a pass (good for two) to an advance screening. Passes and prizes are available while supplies ~last. No purchase necessarv. Limit one per person. Emplovees or warner Bros. Pictures, ThB RBitiBIIIJt WBBkll and UMBC are not eligible. May 8, 2001 PAGE9

The Horowitz ad deserves no "Son of Star Wars " a potential 10 protection under free speech arms race. 12

Free expression and respon­ Long road ahead for all 11 siveness equal sound Americans 13 Journalism T H E ETRIEVER Letter to the Editor WEEKLY Editor: Pomograp)ly Js a pow~rfulforce ·in modern::sexuality - not one to be Editor in Chief Opinion Editor Business Manager taken ligntly. However, I am choosing to bypass the issue of pornography Jennifer Schildroth Abby Foster Matt VanDyke in general to combat one particular statement made by Mr. Shah in his - counterpoint article: ''I can almost guarantee that pornography has stopped ...at least one man from raping a woman." 1 am concerned about Happy Trails and Umbrella Drinl~s correctil!g.this revolting comment for public awareness. Is the vie\Y that no~~~~a~ . pre.yents ra~ ~~~pn? ·... ·· ' .. ·.· ; Well, good readers, another semester and another academic year are Jfh~ §~ate~ent itself nl,,~~F by Mr. Shah, ~'I ~an almost guarantee ~ · · ~" coming to an end. The Retriever staff would like to thank you all for read­ implies· ~ · fact while avoiding responsibility for the fact's reliability. Its ing our fine publication this year and encourages you to continue to read reliabili~ !s clearly in que~tion. There have ... been numerous studies the paper in the future. eXJ)t!)Jr;ltl~~ ' t.lleconsequeric~s pf continued exposure to pornography on Have a lovely time this summer. See your friends, get an internship, me~n·~~ t ~ttit}~p1menrs beliefs j.bqptsexuality . ~~ t~~ir dispositions .. t~\Vard make some money. Spend some time at the pool. Send your mommy to the kitchen with a kind word to get you an umbrella drink. But skin cancer is "'• ····{'}' ...... ,... bad, so don't stay out in the sun too much. Have the best summer of your ,. ········· c.;•·o'· llrtZ· ; ········ i:J1!Qi"tt.~::~::~~:; ~~' ;t~ life, but be safe. Don't drink and drive, and take your friends' keys when · -~.L,.__,_ Sl1<;:)'W«~4 . :tnatsputablY tfta~potnograpby canh.av~ a they start asking for three umbrellas in their drinks. women's sexi{~ty. Men heGanie more In the face of this rosy summer to come, we are met with final exams. ex1r>e:rte11tce much trauma' during Summer will not be any fun if you fail out of college. Everyone's short on thoughts and brain cells in which to store them, but this is the time to turn rape. the gears in your head whether they're oiled or not. Give these last few weeks everything you've got, and then your mommy will be glad to bring you umbrella drinks all summer long. For many of our old friends, this will be their last issue. Good luck, graduating seniors, happy trails and stuff. Put to use everything you've gained from UMBC, and don't forget your poor returning friends, who are not so lucky. The Retriever staff bids a fond farewell to our two soon-to­ be-graduates. It's been a great ride, Adam and Jamie. We'll miss you sore­ ly and wish you the best. Studies Show That Fresh Air, Sports, and Fun Not Lethal to UMBC Students

Well, we've given up on UMBC students coming to support the Retrievers at their games. Hopefully next year you won't be so apathetic, lazy and dorky. Maybe you will actually care about something other than physics or biology or history and detach yourself from the chair in front of your computer. Then you to the editor to f>[email protected] or to The Retriever can go outside and have fun (you know outside right? That place you are in on 214~ lOOOHiiltop Circle, Baltimore, MD, 21250. your way to classes?). We aren't asking you to just jump out of your chair and run to a game with your body painted black and gold. We know you need to take this slowly. So your first step should be finding out where all the athletic events are held, such Adam Craigmiles ...... Managing Editor Retriever Weekly staff editorials reflect as the RAC and the track. Then you can find out what sports play when and Scott Daugherty ...... News Editor the views of the editorial board; signed DO NOT look on your computer to find this out. Go to the RAC and get a Sarah Andrews ...... Asst. News Editor columns and advertisements represent the schedule or better yet, ask a real live person (they are all those people around Stephanie Rawlings . Asst. Opinion Editor opinions of the individual writers and adver­ you that you never talk to). People know things, so talk to them, even ask them Anna Kaplan ...... Features Editor tisers, respectively, and do not necessarily if they'd like to go to the game with you. When you fmally do go to a game, Michelle Jabes ...... Asst. Features Editor reflect those of The Retriever Weekly or the you don't have to cheer your head off right at the beginning, wait until· you Katie Rouse ...... Focus Editor University of Maryland Baltimore County. understand what's going on so you don't look like a jackass cheering for the Rachel Singerman ...... Asst. Focus Editor Letters to the Editor are printed verba­ referee. Pratik Shah ...... Sports Editor tim, although the editors reserve the right to Eventually, after you have worked up your tolerance to sunlight and fresh Brandon Dudley ...... Asst. Sports Editor edit any letter deemed lengthy, repetitive, air, you can start to cheer and actually care. Then if you really want to you can Nate West ...... Photography Editor libelous or otherwise in need of revision. The go back to your computer, because it's not going to run away while you are J. Wustner-Brown ...... Asst. Photo Editor editors further reserve the right not to print gone. Since sports are pretty much over for this year you have all summer to David Punzalan ...... Production Manager any letter for any reason. Letters to the Editor practice this for next year. Try going to an Orioles game, or a local soccer Jamie Peck ...... Production Asst. must be typed or written legibly and include game, or maybe try playing a sport yourself for fun. Whatever you do, just stay Diana Zeiger ...... Production Asst. the author's name and telephone number. away from your damn computer! James Hamilton ...... Production Asst. Letters must be received by 12 p.m. on Ray Shaw ...... Technology Manager Thursday and may not exceed 400 words. Adam Craigmiles ...... Circ. Manager The Retriever Weekly publishes weeki y Brett McKenzie ...... Ads Manager on Tuesdays during the regular school year. Owen Palmquist ...... Asst. Ads Manager Editors can be reached at (410) 455-1260 during normal business hours or at University Center 214; 1000 Hilltop Circle; UMBC; [Chn·~~s~;;sj Baltimore, MD 21250. The Retriever Weekly is an equal opportunity employer. PAGE 10 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY OPINION May 8, 2001 Printing Horowitz Ad a Misconception of First Amendment The First Amendment is about gov­ nent. This misleading advertisement ran fn the four years r worked at the Emily Bernstein ernmental restriction, and the language of without anything to represent the other paper we received only two such ads. One the amendment makes that clear: side of the issue, or even anything to pres­ was barely concealed anti-Semitism, the Recently newspapers across the "Congress shall make no law ... abridging ent arguments against reparations that are other an extremely graphic, inaccuracy­ country, including The Retriever Weekly, the freedom of speech, or of the press." not merely racist assertions. At least a filled newsletter from a fringe pro-life received a full-page advertisement chal­ Notice there is no indication that "The point/counterpoint on reparations should group. lenging the proposal to give reparations to Retriever have taken the place of the one on We did not print either of these African Americans for the time their Weekly pornography that appeared opposite the advertisements because we felt our uni­ ancestors were held in slavery. In spite of shall make ad two weeks ago. versity newspaper was not the place for the half-truths and racist statements used no decision The staff did try to convince several such hateful, misleading tirades. Our to support this challenge, the Retriever abridging people to write opinion articles or submit decisions were not based on a dislike of editors printed the advertisement. POINT the freedom ads to counter Horowitz's full-page pitch. the ideas themselves. Had a pro-choice Written by David Horowitz, the ad of racist The effort to find someone to do this group sent us an ad depicting an abortion makes a number of dubious claims, with speech on proves the staff recognized the other side provider, covered in blood with a bullet the author at one point insisting that repa­ its pages." The "ideal embodied in the needed to be heard alongside the ad. The through his head, with the message "This rations have already been paid out to First Amendment" was never that all commitment to balance, however, does is what pro-lifers do!" we would not have African Americans in the forms of wel­ newspapers would print every piece of not stop when those asked are unable to published that either. fare and affirmative action. Under the garbage thrown their way. put together an article in one week on the If the Ku Klux Klan, not David heading, "What about the debt blacks owe Horowitz is still free to plaster his extremely complex topic of slavery repa­ Horowitz, had submitted this ad, would to America?" Horowitz refers to emanci- manifesto all over campus ori the many rations. The · Retriever have run it? Certainly the pation as a "gift," asserting public bulletin boards, give Even if the staff collectively wanted statements that the "black underclass" is a that if not for the benevo- "Freedom of speech speeches to passersby on to remain objective by not taking sides, "result of failures of individual character" the quad and air his views there is no reason two staff members and that reparations are "an extravagant lence of AngloA-Sfrat.xcoann dictates that David Christians, on a talk radio program, if couldn't have expressed their personal new handout that is only necessary Americans would still be Horowitz has the they would have him. If the opinions on slavery reparations in a because some blacks can't seem to locate slaves. Clearly, the ad is not right to spout his government were to tell Point/Counterpoint. Objectivity and bal­ the ladder of opportunity," would be con­ racist simply because it Horowitz that he could not ance go hand in hand; thus objectivity sidered extremely racist if made by the argues against reparations drivel. Freedom of print his ad at all nor could was thrown out the window the moment Klan. Yet an ad that says exactly these -the racism is in the argu- the press dictates he speak on the issue in Horowitz's diatribe was printed with things has been published in our campus ments that are made. public, that would be a seri­ nothing to oppose it. Advertisement or newspaper. In a staff editorial that any press ous constitutional violation. not, it remains a controversial opinion At Bob Jones University, perhaps this appearing in the same issue organization has A college newspaper refus­ that demands balance. sort of ad would be considered appropri­ as the Horowitz ad, the the right not to print ing to publish his tirade is That said, the ad still should not have ate. Here, it most certainly is not. staffers (with the exception not unconstitutional; it is an been accepted for publication. Angering and alienating a significant sub­ of those who admirably his drivel." exercise in the selectivity Choosing not to run a fallacious, section of the readership should be a large elected to have their names that every newspaper has offensive advertisement does not mean concern for The Retriever, both as a busi­ removed that week) collectively explain the right, and indeed the responsibility, to The Retriever would never be able to run ness that is dependent upon the respect of that they chose to run the ad in order "to exercise. issue ads ever again. It would simply its readers and as an ethical news organi­ strive for the ideal embodied in the First Freedom of speech dictates that indicate that The Retriever is willing to zation responsible to the community it Amendment." However, Horowitz has no David Horowitz has the right to spout his use its discretion in each case to choose serves. First Amendment right to have his ad drivel. Freedom of the press dictates that what unabashed propaganda is not worthy published in any newspaper, and it is any press organization has the right not to of the paper on which it is printed. This is Emily Bernstein is a senior majoring · unacceptable to insist that the ideal of print his drivel. not difficult; after all, it is not as though in interdisciplinary studies and former freedom of speech provides an indis­ If objectivity is the goal- that is, not The Retriever Weekly is being inundated editor in chief of The Retriever Weekly. putable reason for newspapers to provide valuing one opinion or point of view over with highly controversial and factually She can be reached by e-mail at bern­ him ad space. another - balance is a necessary compo- deceptive ads. [email protected]. Horowitz Conveniently Left Out Crucial Info because if it weren't for their ancestors who as a slap in the face. He has absolutely no writer, home security system, ironing Jasmine Hillyer ordained wealth for white America, who so right to make a snap judgement such as board, lawn mower and thousands of graciously gave blacks all their hearts that. He didn't say anything about the countless other inventions that no Ignorance is bliss and by the article­ desired, blacks would not be where they are Jewish community receiving reparations American (white or black) could live like advertisement that ran t\\ ' weeks ago today? What about the white slave owners and we all know that the Holocaust did without. ''Ten Reasons Why Reparation~ "'or Slavery who gained economic prosperity off.of the not occur in the United States, nor did it In his advertisement Horowitz states is a Bad Idea - and Racist Too," we can labor of their slaves? What have over a 200-year time- that "If it weren't for a white American see that people are blissfully content being about section vm, which I "As a black person line. president who gave his life to sign the ignorant. Mter reading David Horowitz's personally found to be the The one that I found Emancipation Proclamation, blacks in ad the only word that came to my mind was most offensive out of all who is not on welfare quite comical was section America would still be slaves." In recent "agitated." Very, very agitated. The ques­ ten, "Reparations to and knows several IX which was titled "What years more blacks have learned that the tion on my mind was not how an individual African Americans Have About The Debt Blacks Emancipation Proclamation did not apply could think such terrible crap, but why. Already Been Paid?" By SUCCessful blacks that Owe To America?" I don't to slaves in border states fighting on the Mter reading his pseudo-history les­ who and in the form of do not rely on any know where to begin Union side, nor did it apply to slaves in son on slavery, I was quite compelled to what? . type of government te~ling y?u what is wrong southern states under Union control. So make my own. Welcome to Black History Accordmg to good old w1th th1s statement. A whom did Lincoln free? While some black 101 -"What Horowitz Didn't Want You To Davie boy, African assistance, I take this group of people who have Americans may still be waiting for their Know." Under section IT titled "There is No Americans receiv:e tril- as a slap in the face." descended from a realm of unreceived 40 acres and a mule, it is evi­ Single Group That Benefited Exclusively lions of dollars in welfare others who were stolen dent by Horowitz's ad that others who From Slavery" Horowitz stated that "If every year. So let me get from their homeland, muti­ have yet to realize we are not where we slave labor has created wealth for this straight. EVERY black person in lated, tortured, abused, raped, disrespect­ need to be may finally wake up and com­ Americans, then obviously it has created America is on welfare? As a black person ed and oppressed is expected to return the prehend that ignorance still reigns as bliss. wealth for black Americans as well, includ­ who is not on welfare and knows several "favor." If you want to get technical, this ing the descendents of slaves." Is he imply­ successful blacks that do not rely on any so called "debt" was paid off when blacks Jasmine Hillyer is a freshman major­ ing that blacks should not complain type of government assistance, I take this invented the refrigerator, elevator, type- ing in English. Agree? Disagree? In either case, our editors want your comments. Write to Opinion with your views. THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY OPINION May 8, 2001 PAGE 11 Appearance of Horowitz Ad Justified and Reasonable

JENNIFER SCHILDROTH Retriever Weekly. That's of the community ways that individuals Editor in Chief of The Retriever Weekly not to say that only and groups could achieve significant vis­ Horowitz's views ibility in countering - or supporting - The narrow-minded, advertisement should be represented. both the content of the ad as well as the penned by conservative radical David Indeed, the Retriever paper's decision. Unfortunately, despite Horowitz has been the topic of much pub­ staff has and continues many assertions that people understood lic debate in the past several months, and to encourage members and were interested in pursuing these recently the issues have plunged deep into of the community to avenues, only minimal response was con­ the heart of the UMBC community. The respond through letters, tributed. advertisement, which refutes the notion of articles and ads of their Had the same material, writt~n in an reparations for slavery, is offensive, and its own, and t vo separate equivocal manner, been published as a presence in The Retriever Weekly two pieces urging readers to letter to the editor or an opinionated arti­ weeks ago has raised some interesting and do so have appeared in cle piece, as it was in Yale's daily paper, complex questions about free expression the paper. Sadly, much or if The Retriever Weekly had denied the and responsible journalism. of the campus seems to money, perhaps the discussion would be Any reasonable person would have missed its opportu­ largely muted, but that is doubtful. (The acknowledge that a newspaper has a cer­ nity to benefit from the Retriever staff has allocated the $675 to tain responsibility to its readers. The available forum of an educational fund for next year, which details surrounding that responsibility and which Horowitz so it intends to use in irnplimentatian of Jerem~ Wustner-Bro~n I The Retr~ever Weekly .Staff effectively took advan- how it is best realized, however, are not so Controversal Ad: meaningful discussion on issues such as Retnever was nght to pnnt Horowitz's t explicit. age. the one surrounding the Horowitz ad. opinion. Unlike a political group, campus Horowitz issued Instead, the primary issue seems to organization or even a newspaper 150 his opinion through a center on the perceived insensitivity of years ago (or many modem foreign press­ cal right to publish anything while accept­ paid advertisement, one of the options the paper in publishing any form of the es which openly pursue partisan objec­ ing little or no responsibility in addressing available to those seeking access to the materiel embodied in the Horowitz ad; tives), a present-day media organization the consequences of such decisions. This is Retriever's readers. This has raised con­ the fact that the piece was an advertise­ has a duty to operate as a vehicle for large­ an absurd assertion that overlooks a cern that the paper's loyalties lie in fiscal ment seems to be tangential to this larger ly uninhibited expression. This objective is paper's larger responsibility to its readers. gain rather than particularly essential in regards to a col­ Journalism does not occur in a vacu­ sound journalis­ lege paper, which must recognize its um where ideology thrives uninhibited and tic conduct. monopolistic role as a campus-wide forum untainted by reality. Any credible media While this while acknowledging that individual and organization should strive to be responsive has clearly been COUNTERPOINT group perspectives will often be in con­ to the needs of its readers. The staff of The disputed pub- tention with one another. Retriever Weekly has sought every licly by the The First Amendment does not guar­ opportunity it thought feasible to encour- Retriever staff, even were it true, it would concern. antee an unbiased press; in age and facilitate discus­ not negate the fact that even in greed, Running the Horowitz ad was not an fact, the oft-recited consti- sion on the issues sur­ selectivity would not be issue-specific. It assault by The Retriever Weekly on the tutional proverb doesn't "Sadly, much of the rounding the Horowitz ad. would, however, illustrate an utter disre­ black community or in any way a mal­ even ensure it journalistic campus seems to Perhaps there are other gard for any impact the piece would have intentioned effort to promote the views of practices. It is not the have missed its avenues that the staff did on the community, which is inherently the staff, which are actually inconsistent Constitution that applies not consider, and the inconsistent with the Retriever's actual with the ad's provocative tone, racial these principles to the opportunity to benefit Retriever openly invites motivation. In hopes of diffusing this rea­ insensitivity and misleading portrayal of media, but the modern from the available suggestions on how to sonable misperception, the staff has American history. However, if the staff concept of journalism expand its role in this attempted to stress that the discussion were to print only that which is faithful to itself. An organization that forum of which process. However, while spurred by the ad and the consequent deci­ its own views, or even what is congruent has as its goal equally dis­ Horowitz so effective­ responsiveness implies sion to run it were grounded in considera­ with the beliefs of every individual or tributed fair-mindedness ly took advantage." sensitiVIty and active tion of free expression, not financial inter­ sect of its constituency (if such a thing in an entirely subjective involvement in creating ests. exists), it would quickly become a self­ world of constant compro- opportunity for expression There is also an understandable con­ assured organization assuming an infinite mise and balanced interests must find its of all views, it does not necessarily equate cern that publishing the piece as an adver­ ability to define the UMBC community. solace in the pursuit of an ideal. For jour­ to providing a forum free of any contro­ tisement gives the financially privileged Such an outcome would be irreparably nalists, that ideal is freedom of expression. versial content. to have greater access to the public forum. damaging to the paper's purpose and to There is no question that other obliga­ The Horowitz advertisement falls in While there is some merit to this state­ those it serves. tions accompany the pursuit of this princi­ this less-than-pleasant category of contro­ ment, it is important to recognize that ads ple. Particularly, a newspaper's accounta­ versial material. It's not an agreeable issue are not the only or necessarily the most Jennifer Schildroth is the editor in bility does not end with its devotion to free to address; it is, nonetheless, an issue. prominent means of employing the paper chief of The Retriever Weekly. She can speech. Many media pundits have pro­ That in . itself is compelling rationale for in opinionated expression. On numerous be reached by e-mail at fessed that newspapers have an unequivo- consideration in the pages of The occasions, staff discussed with members jenn@ trw. umbc.edu.

WHEI YOU'RE WAIT1118 FOR ATRAIISPLAIT, WHAT'S MORE Join SGA as an Executive Cabinet mem­ MIORTAIT: YOIII MEDICAL STATUS OR YOUR FIIAICIAL STAnm? ber. Cabinet members support the President and work toward making U!YlBC a fun, interactive, supportive, aca­ UMBC demically strong university. STUDENT Positions available are: GOVERNMENT Treasurer ASSOCIATION Chief of SGA Operations and Facilities Director of Governmental Affairs Director of Diversity Affairs Director of Public Relations Director of Computing Systems Positions are given a stipend $$$$ for their dedication and hard Contrary to rumors you may have heard, the transplant waiting list is completely blind to work. Information pacets are available at the front desk in the wealth or celebrity status. Once you're on the list for a donor organ, what really counts is the Office of Student Life, UC206. severity of your illness, time spent waiting, blood type and other important medical information. Call 1-800-355-SHARE or visit www.shareyourlife.org for honest information on organ donation. To apply, turn in a ciover letter (share what position you want, why And remember, if you want to be a donor, you must tell your family or it may not happen. you want it, and qualities you have to do an outstanding job) and TALl TO YOUR FAMilY ABQUJ DOIAliiS LIFE .. resume to the OFfice of Student Life, UC206, to Barbara Little by

Coalition on Organ & Ttssue Donation May 15, 2001. PAGE 12 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY OPINION May 8, 2001

~··.. ·· Drawing the Starting Line for a New Arms Race

Another consideration is the cost. despite President Bush's remarks that strategic nuclear weapons off of their Matt VanDyke Since 1983, the United States has invested "perhaps one day" it could be possible to hair-trigger alert status that dates back more than $70 billion on missile defense have a joint American-Russian missile to the Cold War. The Comprehensive At the National War College on technology with little to show shield. A potential side-effect of Test Ban Treaty should be entered into May lst, President Bush gave his first for it. Estimates for continued such a response by Russia could force, and negotiations with other states speech on missile defense, laying out his research run from $60 to $100 be a weakening of its economy continued to further reduce the number plans for what some in the press have billion, without a guaranteed by government spending on a of nuclear weapons around the world. called "Son of Star Wars." Although he payoff in results. The technolo­ missile program they really can­ Some have also proposed a treaty ban­ stopped short of declaring that the gy to hit a bullet with a bullet, as not afford, which could affect ning the manufacture of fissile material United States would unilaterally with­ missile defense as often been both the economy and security of for weapons purposes. Most countries draw from the Anti-Ballistic Missile described, is simply nonexistent other countries around the globe. support such proposals, and real Treaty, Bush did manage to trigger flash­ at this time. The truth is that the spread of progress could be made using these backs in some Cold War veterans and There is much more at nuclear weapons technology has strategies. throw a milkbone to the far right puppies stake, however, than billions of been successfully limited for over The United States should not alto­ of the Republican Party. taxpayer dollars. The most lethal 30 years since the signing of the gether abandon the pursuit of missile Missile defense is a no-win topic for consequence of abrogating the Non-Proliferation Treaty. The defense technology. President Bush has the Bush administration, plain and sim­ ABM treaty by . building a mis­ only countries that have acquired wisely suggested developing ground­ ple. There are several good arguments sile defense system is a new viewimages.com nuclear weapons are three of the and sea-based systems that have a far against it that will undermine just about arms race. China, a poten- four that never signed the better chance of destroying missiles any initiative that the President propos­ tial nuclear adversary of the treaty - Israel, India and right after their launch, but until the es, whether because of political conflict UQited States, sees right "Until the technolo­ Pakistan. Only three signa­ technology is perfected there is no rea­ or technological restraints. through the rogue state gy is perfected there tories have cheated: North son to jeopardize national security by The main rationale given for con­ rationale and recognizes Korea, Iran and Iraq, and encouraging other states to participate structing a missile defense system is to that it is a target of missile is no reason to jeop­ while these violations must in a new nuclear arms race. The U.S. protect the United States from attacks by defense. ardize national secu­ be addressed through vari­ will have to secure the support of its "rogue" nations like Iraq and North China would undoubt- rity by encouraging ous means they do not pro­ allies and the Russians if it is to proceed Korea. Not only are these countries edly respond by escalating vide an adequate rationale without upsetting the current treaties nowhere near capable of firing long its nuclear weapons pro­ other states to par­ for developing a national that have secured peace for decades, a range ballistic missiles that could reach gram to compensate for the ticipate in a new missile defense system. Not daunting challenge to any administra­ the United States, but "rogue" countries protection the missile shield one of our allies supports the tion. are much more likely to use chemical, might offer the United nuclear arms race." proposed system or the abro­ biological or nuclear weapons delivered States if it could be built, gation of the ABM treaty. Matt VanDyke is business manager by terrorists using a briefcase or vehicle thereby inciting a new arms race and Cold If we are going to be serious about of The Retriever Weekly. He can be should they choose to attack targets on War. ending the nuclear threat, there are several reached by e-mail at U.S. soil. Russia may attempt a similar strategy steps that can be taken. The first is to take [email protected].

-.r

Summer Session I May 29-July 6 Summer Session II July9-August 17 Plan NOW for summer!

• Earn up to 16 credits in just 12 weeks Call, email or visit our website: • Lighten your fall course load (410) 455-2335 [email protected] • Accelerate your graduation date www.continuinged.umbc.edu/summer • Take GFR/GER and upper-level courses

Pick up your summer catalogs on campus TODAY! UMBC Summer Programs Catalogs will not be mailed to home addresses, BUT 1000 Hilltop Circle you can check out a complete schedule of classes online Baltimore, Maryland 21250 at www.continuinged.umbc.edu/summer. UMBC AN HONORS UNIVERSITY tM MARVLAI!tD THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY OPINION May 8, 2001 PAGE 13 Young America Faces Tough Life Decisions live lives of ease, but know how to partake end, to go down before other nations which nation maintain a foreign presence ade­ David Geier in victory from toil and risk. have not lost the adventurous qualities. quate to the nation's needs; shrink from As it is with the individual, so to must If America is to be a truly great nation, seeing America do its share of the world's In the final analysis, the decisions it be with the nation. No nation without any Americans must strive to play a great part work, by bringing order out of chaos in the made by the current generation of history is truly able to stand proudly before in the world. We cannot avoid confronting great, far reaching regions of the globe. Americans will have a profound impact the world. It is far better for a nation to dare these issues head-on. All that America can They believe in that· cloistered life which upon the future of the nation and the world mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, do is determine for ourselves whether or saps the nation of its great virtues, or they beyond. The status of America as the pre­ checked by failure, than to rank with those not we are prepared to face them. We can­ are twined to personal gain or greed that eminent power in the world places the nations that have neither enjoyed much nor not avoid the responsibilities America has recognizes the supremacy of commercial­ tremendous burden-privilege of leadership suffered much. around the globe. All ism. upon the back of every citizen. The American people "Americans must not America can decide is Therefore, America calls not for the life The citizens of America must choose forever walk with those • • • • whether it is ready to meet of ease but for the rigorous life. The twen­ between different poles of human exis­ who have preceded us shrtnk from JUStifted them in a manner that will ty-first century looms large with the fate of tence. One pole is embodied by a life com­ upon the American stage. strife for it is only rebound to the national many nations. If America stands idly by, if mitted to ignoble ease, while the other Americans are mere mor- h ' h h d d d credit, or make our deal­ Americans seek merely lives of swollen, requires the commitment to the rigorous tats, products of the hopes t roug a~ an an- ings with these problems a slothful ease, ignoble peace, and shrinking life. I firmly believe in the rigorous life, a and aspirations of great gerous endeavor that dark and shameful page in from the hard contests where men must win life committed to hard work, unshrinking men, such as John Adams, America will ultimately America's history. at hazard of their lives and all that they hold from danger or hardship and out of these, John Quincy Adams, • We have been given dear, then the bolder and stronger peoples winning the splendid ultimate triumph. Abraham Lincoln and Wln the goal of true the problems to solve. If of the world will pass America by, and will Americans should admire those Theodore Roosevelt national greatness." America undertakes the win for themselves dominion over the embodying victorious effort, who never do because who we are is who solutions, there is always world. Americans must boldly face the rig­ wrong to fellow Americans, who are com­ we were. the danger the nation cannot possibly solve orous life, resolute to do their duty well, res­ mitted to helping friends, and are victorious We must face the great tasks that have it correctly, but to refuse to undertake the olute to uphold righteousness by deed and in the trials of life. It is hard to fail, but it is been left to us to solve and woe unto us if solution simply renders it certain that we word, resolved to be both honest and brave, far worse never to have tried. Life's we fail to solve them. We cannot play the cannot possibly solve it correctly. The to pursue high ideals, yet to use practical achievements are never easy. Those that do part of ancient China and pe content to rot timid man, the lazy man, the man who dis­ methods. Americans must not shrink from come easy are so because of the effort by inches in the ignoble ease within our trusts his country, the over-civilized man, justified strife, for it is only through hard applied by those that came before. borders, by taking no interest in what goes the ignorant man, and the man of dull and dangerous endeavor that America will A healthy state of affairs can only exist on beyond them, sinking in scrambling mind, who are incapable of feeling the ultimately win the goal of true national where everyone makes the conscious deci­ commercialism. Suddenly we should fmd mighty lift that thrills "stern men with greatness. sions to lead clean, vigorous, healthy lives; what China found, that in this world the empires in their brains" - all these, of when children are taught not to shrink from nation that has trained itself to a career of course shrink from seeing the nation under­ David Geier is a junior majoring in challenges, but to overcome them; not to unwarlike and isolated ease is bound, in the take its new duties; shrink from seeing the biology. PAGE 14 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY ADVERTISEMENT May 8, 2001

,-II H ETRIEVER RWEci

THIS RlM HAS NOT VET BfEN RATED Come to -TIIeRetrierer weetiJsFunFest on the uc Plaza during tree hour on Wednesdav 5/9 to win a pass (good tor two) to a special adVance screening. Passes and prizes are available while supplies last.~No purchase nacessarv. limit one per person. Emplovees ot Paramount Pictures, Tile Bettleret WBBkll and UMBC are not ellalble. May 8, 2001 PAGE 15

Susan Harris hits the Michelle Jabes checks 16 Maryland Film Fest out of the Curio Shoppe 21

Jamie Peck unwraps Adam Craigmiles fries 20 The Mummy Returns in his final Skillet 22 pnsert name here] b y a n n a kaplan t's pretty difficult, dear Obviously, none of you are readers, even for a column slackers. Instead, you do noth­ I as amazing as this one, to ing but fulfill all your responsi­ write itself at the end of a gru­ bilities as students. Good for eling 19-paper semester. Ifyou you. You will all succeed in remember from way back life in ways [INH] never will. when, this was the semester Speaking of success, this [INH] had to write a total of 19 column is now master of the papers, four of which remain game of Freecell. See, and you to be written. Ah, the joys of thought you were a slacker! being a liberal arts major! But soon this semester will At around this time every be over, 19 papers and all, and year, the vast majority of col­ all you happy little children lege students become harried, can go frolic in the summer jaded and apathetic lumps. You sun. Or, toil at some random know the symptoms - bags job, whatever the case may be. under eyes, wearing the same As for itself, [INH] still has no pair of jeans for a week, hair a clue what it is doing in the greasy mess, cigarette perched months to come. Sometime Nate West I Retriever Weekly Staff between coffee-stained lips, this week, it will go and scav­ Tiki Priestess: FASA emcee Luanne David spiced up UMBC's Filipino cultural show with quick wit. papers upon papers to write enge the general Towson area and tests upon tests for which for available jobs. Que sera, to study. [INH] knows this all sera, whatever will be, will be too well, thus it forgives you ... Ah, but that was [INH] get­ Student Group Bridges Pair of for not entering last week's ting mellow and philosophical. contest, which asked you to No wonder - it is composing Cultures in UMBC Performance tell this column why you are a bigger slacker than it. see INSERT, page 16 JENNIFER SCHILDROTH cultures that is a daily reality for renditions of popular western Retriever Weekly Editorial Staff Filipino Americans. The celebra­ music by members of FASA and tion cleverly employed technolo­ UMBC's Filipino American In a celebration that enjoined gy as the cultural meeting community, and was peppered Smith Strikes Back the best of two worlds, the ground. with superb interjections from Filipino American Students Despite technical and organi­ Villalas and David. Filmmaker Caps Off Jersey Movies Association's fourth annual cul­ zational difficulties, which Mter opening the show with tural show, www.pistahan2001. emcees Michael Villalas and both the Filipino and U.S. Smith has declared his latest RYAN BLOOM com, showcased the talents of Luanne David played off through national anthems, Villalas and Retriever Weekly Staff Writer movie, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Filipino students through per­ masterful improvisational David introduced the storyline Back, the last in the line of New formances of both Western and humor, the affair provided an that would link each perform­ Say the name Kevin Smith to Jersey films. That means no more traditional Filipino acts last engaging lineup that kept the ance to the others. almost any slightly film aware Holden, no more Alyssa, no more Friday. audience of over 300 cheering The duo used the "sites," with individual and you are just about Banky, Brody, Jay or Bob. All the While the night's spmt was and laughing throughout the comic addresses to explain dif­ guaranteed to get Clerks some­ characters Kevin Smith has secret­ entertaining and light-hearted, night. ferent aspects of Filipino her­ where in the response. This isn't ly coerced us into loving will no the event, cosponsored by the The program consisted of itage, particularly accounts of the necessarily a bad thing, after all longer be. Scary thought. Office of Student Life, skillfully numerous Filipino dance and how bad can becoming a famous Instead, what we have to look illuminated a blending of the two cultural pieces intermixed with see FASA, page 22 filmmaker be? It's just that, well, forward to is a fresh clean slate of as good as Clerks is, the man has filmmaking that looks like it may directed three movies since then begin with a remake of sorts. with a fourth being readied for According to Smith, he is set to - Mullet-ing Around With Quinn summer release. It's understand­ but has not yet begun - work on able that four ftlms later Kevin a readaptation of the Fletch novel. Brett McKenzie: First of all, spot on Saturday Night Live? Smith doesn't want to go down in Yes, that is correct, the ultra-funny BREIT MCKENZIE Retriever Weekly Staff Writer I'd like to apologize for the way I CQ: Well, frrst I was hired as history as "that Clerks guy." talk. I'm from Jersey. a writer, and after a while, Lome To make that thought a reality, see SMITH, page 16 Most people know comedian Colin Quinn: (Laughing) [Michaels] just started putting me Colin Quinn best for his work as Wonderful. I like you already. on. the news anchor on the Saturday BM: You yourself have a par­ BM: It seems like a lot of peo­ Night Live sketch "Weekend ticularly strong accent. To clarify, ple get their starts as writers. Update." But when you chisel where exactly in New York are CQ: Yeah, It's got that flavor away the fame, the Irish New you from? to it. Lome just starts putting peo­ Yorker considers himself a pretty CQ: To clarify, I'm from a lit­ ple in sketches after a while. It regular guy ... with a bad obses­ tle place called Brooklyn. happens. sion with mullets. Colin will be BM: Well then I have to ask BM: It seems like most come­ appearing here at UMBC live on you, Yankees or Mets? dians are excellent writers as well. Thursday night. CQ: Mets. I just read some of Steve Martin's My phone rings and an overly BM: Ohno! stuff. cheerful woman says "Hello, CQ: Well, you know, CQ: Oh yeah, he's great! Brett? I've got Colin Quinn on the Brooklyn, you have to like the BM: All right, this may sound line." I've been watching Mets. a little offensive but .. . does Saturday Night Live since I was BM: I don't think I can con­ Norm Macdonald hate you, or two years old, so the opportunity tinue this interview. what? Lions Gate Films to actually chat with any member CQ: (Laughing) Well, perhaps CQ: (Laughing) I don't think Dastardly Duo: Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes, here seen in of the cast is mind-boggling for I could adapt. Dogma, star in the to-be-released Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. me. BM: So how did you earn a see QUINN, page 17 PAGE 16 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES May 8, 2001 Maryland Film Festival Showcases Fine Local Talent

SUSAN HARRIS Myrick. lutionaries entered the Selective Service dren of America from drug smugglers than Retriever Weekly Staff Writer The mission of the Maryland Film Office in Catonsville, took draft files out­ a group of AWOL mental patients? Or Festival, which is funded mainly by an side and burned them in defiance of the should one ask, who better to save these Maryland has had its fair share of cine­ "unusual public/private partnership in conflict in Vietnam. Of course, the group mental patients from themselves? Is it matic recognition. From the numerous Maryland," has two practical economic was arrested for violating federal laws and well-respected psychiatrist Dr. J.J. props Baltimore native John Waters places development goals: 1) "To create a world destroying federal property. The group was Stackhouse, or are these patients going to in his off-beat films, to the chilling block­ class film festival centered in Baltimore," sentenced to as many as three years in save him? Director Tom Russell imposes buster release of The Blair Witch Project and 2) "to bring filmmakers to Maryland prison, and while some served their time, these strange questions in his bizarre and (Blair Witch 2 doesn't count), Maryland as a way to encourage future production in others went underground for a large part of touching film Mental. As Stackhouse tries has stomped into the cinema scene with a the state." The fest is used as a fundraising their lives to avoid a prison sentence and to infiltrate the patients who have set up a determination to bring the culture of inde­ vehicle as well for film preservation, and a continue their protest. The trial of the military camp on the beach, he covertly pendent filmmakers and production dol­ portion of every ticket for the event will Catonsville Nine drew worldwide atten­ joins the team and begins to understand lars of Hollywood to our fine crab infested go to a film preservation project. tion to the Baltimore area, as well as thou­ and respect the "soldiers" and their outra­ state. And in case you didn't notice the I had the privilege of attending this sands of demonstrators and national news geous mission. The group's well-spoken bright lights and red carpets surrounding year's festival event and I only wish I had broadcasters. The event eventually leader, Phillip, leads and trains them to Baltimore's finest movie theaters this more time to view all of the many inter­ spawned a play and an acclaimed film pro­ become masters at their "special responsi­ ' 1eekend, the city hosted its third annual esting, intelligent and sometimes disturb­ duced by Gregory Peck. bility" and essential to the success of their Vlaryland Film Festival. ing films screened. From opening night at Lynn Sachs' visual style of the docu­ mission. Mental is a hysterical, yet true The festival was officially launched on the Senator, to the Charles, the Heritage mentary evokes the strong emotions of t~e and heart-felt feature that makes very April 22, 1999 with the world premier of and even Benjie's Drive-in, Baltimore was event itself. She breaks away from the tra­ challenging statements about human rela­ Barry Levinson's (Diner, TV's Homicide) overflowing with some of its greatest film ditions of documentary filmmaking and ti~n~!J.ips and minds. The film is enor­ Diner Guys at the historic Senator Theatre. talents and it was not an event to miss. juxtaposes the serenity and beauty of mously funny yet still able to tug on those Levinson~ a Maryland native, directed as However, for those who did, here are a Baltimore County neighborhoods with the heartstrings. Shot in black and white on an well as hosted the screening, and since has few films I was lucky enough to catch and tension and personal nature of the actions extremely low budget in eleven .days, become a major supporter of the film fest. recommend to anyone who is interested in done by those involved with the Mental even has a surprise ending that That weekend, over 8000 film goers seeing some great local cinema. Catonsville Nine. After the screening, the makes it an indie flick worthy of recogni­ viewed over 100 films including over 40 audience participated in a question/answer tion. different filmmakers, writers, actors and Investigation of a Flame session with members of the Nine, prose­ personalities, each of which hosted a spe­ Opening night featured a documentary cutors, jurors and family members. The American Chai cial screening. Because of the festival's film by Baltimore's own Lynn Sachs, wife session became a bit heated, so everyone Growing up as a first-generation huge opening success, the staff hosted a of UMBC film instructor Mark Street. The headed to the afterparty to sip free martinis Indian-American in a traditional Indian "Between the Festival" event, which sold film explores the actions and lives of the courtesy of Brilliant Vodka. home has been a challenge for Sureel. He out due to the largely anticipated world infamous Catonsville Nine, a group of learned through his youth how to sneak release of The Blair Witch Project hosted Vietnam War protestors made up of local Mental by directors Eduardo Sanchez and Dan residents and clergy. In 1967, these revo- Who could be better to save the chil- see FESTNAL, page 21 Kevin Smith's New Face [insert name here] from SMITH, page 15 Ultimately, are we really not gonna write? to how [INH] is doing - that's what the Yeah, we may not get paid for it, but we're from INSERT, page 15 Pretrievers are for. This fine publication comedy series originally starring Chevy still gonna be writing like mad so that when itself in the wee hours of Saturday releases two issues in the summer, one Chase may once again grace theater screens the strike ends they can sell all the shit night/Sunday morning after spending in June and one in August. If you hap­ all across the nation. The scary part is that we've been working on. Writer's striking ... the previous night sleeping in a very hot pen to catch either of these, you will with Kevin Smith at the helm they may just it's so bizarre." room. Has this column ever mentioned learn all about this column's adventures fmd a way to make the new series even fun­ On film budgets: "Most of the fairly in whatever job it's working and what­ nier than the original. Series? Yep, you famous celebrities in the movie we have its intense loathing of summer heat? If not, well, then, there you go. [INH] hates ever crap is going on in its life. Gotta heard that correct, too. If all goos well Smith worked with before and that kind of helps. summer heat, along with everything love print media. hopes to adapt the sequel, Fletch Lives, as Everyone else kind of jumps on board associated with it like bugs, humidity And with that, [INH] wishes you all well. because of what they see. It'S- because of and the impossibility of sleeping in hot a wonderful summer. Don't postpone Not bad at all for a guy who originally stuff like that, what's gone before, because rooms. joy, eat ice cream, do something you've saw himself owning a deli as his main lord knows we don't pay them a lot of At least this summer can't be worse never done before, meet new people or means of career income. "I thought I could money. Miramax doesn't like to shell out · than the last. Last summer was, for innu­ discover new things about people you make a decent sandwich," Smith says. for casts. When we started shooting we had merable reasons, one of the worst in this already know, take walks on the beach "Based on my girth alone I can tell you I can 20 digital effects. WhEm we finished now column's life. Now it prefers to believe in the middle of the night to collect make a decent sandwich." Kevin Smith is we have 200. There's also some practical seashells, question everything, be spon­ never at a loss for words. effects that aren't digital. It's a far, far, far that summers really can't get worse than that one and it hopes it will not be taneous, cry if you want to, laugh if you On happiness after the Jersey films: "I cry from Clerks or Chasing Amy or even proven wrong because that would be want to, don't let the Man get you down imagine the films that I will make will be Dogma." and don't come back without stories that very personal, they just won't feature the On parenthood: ''The kid was around evil. Fortunately for you, dear readers, you can tell your grandchildren one day. same characters. They will just be new char­ while we were making the movie and I you will not have to remain in suspense And of course, as always, don't you acters like Rory and Silent Bill." know it is gonna put her in therapy later on, for the entire three months of summer as dare stay sober. Reality is no fun. Adieu! On character development: "If any­ but she just rolled with it. She's in the thing, it's hyper-reality. I don't care who the movie and that is kind of a pain in the ass. I If you really, really want to share something with this column during those long, grueling summer months, writer is. There is no such thing as a real never knew how much I didn't like child contact it at [email protected]. And as a last note, [INH] would like to wish two departing Retriever character. Reality is kind of boring. actors until I worked with my own fucking Weekly members luck and everything else that's good and holy in their lives. Adam the Managing Editor and Jamie the Movie Bitch are both leaving, which is very sad since they are both awesome guys. This Conversations are stilted. They don't flow kid." column hopes they keep in touch, wherever life's strange ways may lead them and however the ephemer­ very well. When you're writing you create a On the new Fletch: "Basically I just al strings of fate may twist. Goodbye, don't let the demonic winged monkeys from hell make you cry. world where that doesn't really happen. want to do justice to the book. I'm trying to You're creating a perfect world. There is a stay as close as I can to the book because it hint of reality to it. In life most people are is a wonderful read. The first Fletch movie waiting to speak. I think what I tend to do is is a wonderful movie and close to the book, hyper-realistic." but it still deviates a little and I don't want On the ensuing strike: "About the to deviate at all. I think it will be different. I strike, I honestly don't know what they're have a great respect for writers in general striking about. I don't have any complaints. and I just can't see that I am gonna add any­ I would never use a film by credit. I don't thing to it. I just want to kind of hand out the know if that is necessarily something worth book. I think it will be the easiest writing striking about. People will always believe it gig I've ever had." begins and ends with the director. I've never On living his dreams: "I couldn't say I felt any of the movies we've made are a film ever dreamt of this, so yeah, I'm just wait­ by me. If you're gorma do away with the ing fur the other shoe to drop. I'm waiting credit do away with it because more than for an early death because nothing can ever two people work on it, it's everybody. go this good, but till then, shoot, I enjoy it." THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES May 8, 2001 PAGE 17 SNL Comedian Talks Mullets, Writing and Television from QUINN, page 15 BM: Well, I liked it. BM: Woody Allen has a sort of balding always wondered what you all thought CQ: Yeah, well, you're the only one! mullet going on. when Britney Spears hosted. . so. [After I replaced him on "Weekend BM: This may seem a little random, but CQ: I love Woody Allen. One of the CQ: Anyone who likes your sketch is Update"], I think we both had an under­ I have to ask ... what do you think of mul­ greatest mullets of all times is Brian cool. They get their preferences of who standing. You know. He is a fun guy. lets? Bosworth. You know him? they want to work with. The person I want­ BM: Who inspired you to pursue come­ CQ: Aww! How could you even ask me BM: Can't say I do. ed to meet was Christopher Walken. dy? this, all I've been talking about is mullets. I CQ: He was in Stone Cold. He's 6'5" BM: Oh he's fantastic. Have you seen CQ: George Carlin and Richard Pryor. love mullets r I was actually just on this 250 pounds of mullet. that new music video by Fatboy Slim Because he's Irish. When I first heard their website, Mulletsgalore.com. It's great! BM: You'll really be prepared for the where Christopher Walken is just dancing albums I was blown away. BM: Well, then you'll be prepared for Arbutians at this rate. around? BM: What really goes on during com­ when you get here. CQ: Arbutians? CQ: Yeah, I have. Hey, Fatboy Slim has mercial breaks on SNL? CQ: How so? BM: The town next to UMBC is called a mullet. He has an English mullet. See, CQ: Everybody's running around half­ BM: Well, some of the locals are Arbutus. That's where the bulk of the mul­ they're still popular over there. In Ireland, naked changing clothes for the next scene. let's just say mullets abounding. lets are. The Arbutian people. they invented the mullet. It's almost a shag. BM: Have you seen anyone naked? CQ: That's great! I do a bit about mul­ CQ: (Laughing) I'm excited already! A shag with a little bit of mullet. Same pro­ CQ: I've tried, but no, they always lets in my act. BM: Well, it's a small school, you know. portions as a mullet, but less squared. cover themselves. I guess they're hiding BM: I hope you don't get them all riled A lot of the locals may come to the show. BM: (Laughing) You know, when I from people like me! up and angry, they'll attack you after the CQ: It's not a small school, isn't there look back and remember this interview in BM: What was your favorite SNL show. like 30,000 kids? the future, I'm gonna remember that we sketch that you were in? CQ: I'm ashamed to say this, but if you BM: No, that's College Park. spent three-fourths of the conversation CQ: "Lenny the Lion" on "Update." see this thing I did in 1991 on HBO, you CQ: Oh ... oops. talking about mullets. BM: Who makes you laugh the hardest? can see almost the traces of a mullet. BM: So what now? CQ: Well, mullets are great. CQ: Urn ... comedian-wise, Nick BM: Oh no! You had a mullet? CQ: I left the show, I'm doing this HBO BM: So will you do anymore writing? DePaulo. If you watch Comedy Central, CQ: I had a mullet and crazy pants. thing that I'm writing with a friend of mine, CQ: I'll write some other stuff. See you know him. BM: You had a mullet! it should be an interesting show. Maybe we where my work takes me. BM: I live for Comedy Central. CQ: Hey, everyone has a fatal flaw. can fit mullets. My favorite thing about the BM: You seem very untouched by your CQ: Yeah. Well he's the attractive JFK slept around, I had a mullet. mullet is on that site, they go Limp Bizkit fame. Italian guy who has a little bit of a mean BM: If you could watch only one tele­ and Kid Rock and I don't wanna hear any CQ: Yeah, because people don't treat streak. vision show for the rest of your life, what complaints or attacks, mullet boy. me like I'm famous. They see me on the BM: What about people on the show? would it be? BM: Have you ever heard of Wesley street and they're li)ce "Hey, Colin Quinn! CQ: I always loved Will Ferrill on SNL. CQ: A&E Investigative Reports, you Willis? He wrote a song called "Cut the Help me move my couch!" People see me He's great. know, the prison shows. Mullet." I bet you'd love it. as a regular guy. I guess because I am. BM: Is it true that you're a screen­ BM: Yuck! CQ: You could play a little of it for me. BM:.Well, if it makes you feel any bet­ writer? CQ: Hey, I'm a boy, all boys like that! BM: Sure. (Playing a little Wesley ter, I was really excited to do this interview. CQ: Oh no. Yes: Unfortunately. That's what we like, prison. I admit that in Willis) CQ: Yeah, a little. BM: ·wait, I'm trying to remember what a way, the prison thing is a little eerie, but CQ: (Cracking up) That's great! BM: I guess that's about it, unless you did ... that's what most boys like. If it was 10 BM: So what do you think of him? you've got anymore mullets to discuss? CQ: No, please, don't remember. years ago and I had my mullet, NASCAR CQ: It sounds like he's got a touch of CQ: (Laughing). No, I think we cov­ BM: No, wait, it's coming to me ... would be my favorite. You know what we the poet. ered all of them. · CQ: It was called Celtic Pride. should do? We should name all the famous BM: Was there anyone who hosted SNL BM: Well thanks so much, Colin, and I BM: Right! With Dan Akroyd! mullets. Jeff Foxworthy had a bit of a mul­ that you'd always wanted to meet or who can't wait to see you Thursday. CQ: (Groaning) let. Who else had a mullet? you wished had not hosted? I mean, I CQ: See ya.

"Prisoner of Society" might not have The Living even rated that noteworthy of a posi­ tion. "Roll on" may actually bring them End Is Near back for another go around. Definitely not receiving the same rotation as last The Aussie punk trio The Living time, The Living End is still relegated End rolled on with their new album, to late-night radio play. This is a shame causing a riot on Broadway and prov- since the riotous chorus is invigorating Aibum Review ing they are no and stimulating. longer prisoners Australia has loved these punks for by Scott Daugherty of society just years, long before they made the trip staring at the light. If you missed the over to the States. Their previous bad puns, buy their new album, Roll album, the self-titled The Living End, On, available from Reprise Records yielded five consecutive hit singles in since March 27. Australia, including the country's You might remember these guys biggest-selling single of 1998, the from their last big hit, "Prisoners of aforementioned "Prisoner of Society." Society," released in the states back in Of course, to this you say, "Who cares, 1998. The angst-filled, freedom-fight­ these are Australians, a people forever­ ing song became a reputable hit on the stereotyped in American eyes as Reprise Records alternative music stations, receiving Put Another Hit on the Barbie: Aussie· import the Living End has a go at the Crocodile Dundee." Still, it is a note­ decent rotation and critical praise. charts with the new release Roll On. worthy factoid for your reading pleas­ Personally, I felt they sounded decent, ure. like a good imitation of the Sex Pistols underbelly for substance. and in the vein of punk that is still melod­ Roll On ends with a live version of updated for the new millennium. The songs are about freedom and ic. Scott Owen, the bassist, neglects the that last big hit; an undoubted attempt Unfortunately no one else seems to fighting for what one believes in, mixed standard gratuitous electric bass and actu­ by Reprise to encourage those that did­ share this feeling, but my opinion still in with a few anthems about alcohol and ally slaps out the bass tabs on an old­ n't buy the last album to buy their new stands. drunken brawling. "Revolution school stand-up bass, both in the studio release. The sad marketing ploy put The first single from Roll On, aptly Regained" is about the recent East Timor and at the concerts. Travis Demsey, the aside, it's a damn good live perform­ titled "Roll On," also brings to mind invasion where Australia intervened as drummer, was a latecomer to the band but ance and makes the band all the more another great punk band, this time the peacemakers and "Don't Shut the Gate" ultimately provided the group with a solid attractive to those listening to them out drunken Dropkick Murphys. Again, no deals with the country's on-going immi­ backbone that gives the music its urgency. of a vintage stereo system. other reviewer seems to share this gration debate. "Carry Me Horne," how­ After the success of "Prisoner of The Living End is worth a listen. opinion. Regardless of who the songs ever, is about good old fashion pub-crawl­ Society," I expected The Living End to go Their punk isn't too hard and grating bring to mind, the music is great. This ing and drunken disobedience. the way of all other Australian carryovers. for the Mix 106.5 crowd out there and is sing-along punk - a strange hybrid Chris Cheney, the band~s singer, song­ Few, if any, in the States expected to hear isn't so soft and sappy that the punk of punk, rockabilly and old fashion writer and guitarist, writes lyrics and of the trio again outside of perhaps a one­ scene should feel dirty for listening to ACIDC rock-n-roll with a nice political music that are interesting, provocative hit-wonder special on VH1 in 10 years. them. PAGE 18 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FOCUS May 8, 2001

trippers. What do you think of when you hear that word? A night out with the boys? Lap dances? Naked Bodies? Wasted money? Harmless entertain­ It's Money in Your Belt, Sment? What about the exploitation of the performers? Sum!J1er is almost here, and lots of college students will run out of the aca­ But a Risky Business demic buildings in a frantic search for summertime employment. Most students Working in Adult Clubs Has Perks, Dangers will want to make as much money in as short a time as possible. Some will head to the beach, others will work from home and many will spend mind~numbing KATHRYN ROUSE forming basic exotic dancing. hours doing sales in retail chains. Retriever Weekly Editorial Staff The money and hours are decent. Strippers won't usually work from 9 to A few college students, mostly of the feminine persuasion, will choose to bare Imagine yourself onstage, wearing the 5,;instead it is more likely to find clubs their bodies for others by working in exotic entertainment. It pays better than wait­ skimpiest bathing suit possible to imagine. with four or five hour shifts. Also, the work ing tables, and it makes for good stories in the fall. However, there are dangers. The lights, alternating between red and is not physically strenuous for-exotic danc­ Strippers and other exotic performers risk sexual harassment ·and assault, bad white, pound down on your exposed flesh. ing. There are places where more demand­ management, drug use and social discrimination. As the music begins, you slowly begin to ing feats are accomplished. Third, the move your body; the whistles and com­ money is decent. One can make more The American public usually thinks of strippers as single white mothers trying mands are drowned out of your ears. money during a club shift than waiting to make a buck. They picture seedy joints with promiscuous employees. There is Walking back stage 15 minutes later, you tables. great disdain for that whole sector of the entertainment industry, and the employ­ have made another 20 dollars. All in all, The dangers include sexual assault, ees suffer most. This week in Focus, we'll look at exotic entertainment. You can you'll expect to take home around $200 drug use and social stigma. Stripping is dif­ travel with us to the extremely risque places abroad, get a woman's perspective tonight. ferent from worJcing for an escort service or Would you do it? flat out prositution. In most places, the on the American variety and learn about the technical aspects of the job. After aU, The exotic entertainment industry is patrons are not allowed to touch the ifs getting hot enough that no one wants to keep clothes on. lucrative. After all, everyone knows that employees. sex sells in this culture. Strip bars, night Also, many cities have laws about cov­ clubs and independent services all profit erage of the nipple and pubic area. So, there from the public's interest in the naked bod­ is little risk of sexually transmitted dis­ Participant Observation ies of others. Whether or not you want to eases. There can be problems outside of the put a moral jugdement on that is your deci­ clubs, when drunken or aroused patrons An Insider's View on the Backstage Business sion. What is interesting to consider would decide to continue the show with the now be the dangers that accompany the lifestyle off-work employees. The sexual harass­ KATHRYN ROUSE ly participating in the culture. of its participants. ment and assault that results from these sit­ Retriever Weekly Editorial Staff "[The men] looked at the women as sex First off, .most of the exotic dancers are uations is a risk of the job. objects, but the women looked at them as women. There are men who strip, as well as One of the reasons that risk is so much People who work in the exotic enter­ money objects. No one is a person in this gay and lesbian clubs and those that feature higher for exotic dancers rather than other tainment industry aren't nice, college-edu­ business. The women knew what they were domination or fetish shows. For the most cated people, are they? Maybe the stereo­ doing; it was the best way for them to make part, the exotic dancing discussed in this type is wrong. One UMBC student was not the most money. They made more money article refers to young adult women per- see DANCERS, page 19 a dancer herself but was connected to the than I did." business nonetheless. She continued to explain about the "A friend of mine operated a shop that kinds of girls she saw. ''There were a few makes costumes and out- dancers who were stu- fits for exotic dancers. "[The men ]looked at the dents, but most were Business was good; she young women. They hand-made really beauti- women as sex objects, were pleasant people. ful pieces. She needed but the women looked at They had an image that people to decorate the they had [worked costumes with rhine- them as money objects. towards]. Many of them stones and sequins . . I No one is a person zn had [breast surgery] or could use a needle, thread th . b . , were saving up for it. I and a glue gun, and I lS uszness. imaging that the cus- decided I could use the tomers go looking for extra money." certain things, and they want to provide She worked with the company for about them with that." a year, part-time. She decorated pasties, Then again, "most of them had stage bikinis and lingerie wear. The most popular names or didn't use their last names. [This motif was the American Flag. kind of work] has a stigma attached to it; The costumes sold for anywhere from the whole atmosphere has that." $25 to $50 dollars, depending on the intri­ While she doesn't take sides as to cacy. All of the costumes were original whether or not exotic dancing is morally designs and were made from scratch. wrong or economically beneficial, "the She occasionally accompanied her thing that made me most upset was that the coworkers to the clubs to sell the costumes. money that was being stuffed into these Jeremy Wustner-Brown I Retriever Weekly Staff Her impression of the business is one that women's garters could have gone towards Girls, Girls, Girls: Club Pussycat is on "The Block" in Baltimore City, which has stems from being involved without actual- new clothes for the patrons' kids." lost much of its charm to seedy clubs and streetwalkers. PAGE 20 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES May 8, 2001

the kid wisecracks, "Get a room," don't A Mummy be surprised if you're thinking the same thing. The numbing plot set-up deals Best Left in with an ancient warrior known as the Scorpion King (wrestling icon the Rock, already green-lighted for his own Wrapping Mummy spin-off feature, in a blink­ Just how its titular movie monster and-miss-it tum) and his legendary regenerates itself by consuming the bracelet, which, if worn incorrectly, flesh of mortal humans, The Mummy could bring about the apocalypse. Blah Movie Review Returns (* out of blah blah. This stuff goes on so long four) regurgitates that around the half-hour point, atten­ by Jamie Peck bits and pieces of tive viewers will be asking, "Isn't this other films and assorted pop cultural film supposed to be about a mummy artifacts. You might think a flick with who's returning?" the everything-and-the-kitchen-sink gall Bingo. Enter Imhotep (Arnold to borrow bits and pieces from Titanic Vosloo ), the decrepit, decaying, Mr. and Teddy Ruxpin in the same scene Clean-esque sorcerer from The would result in a savorably silly view­ Mummy. Rick and Ev thwarted his ing experience at the very least, but this plans for world domination before, so is a throwaway blockbuster sequel he's understandably cranky. To even that'll try your patience for most oF its the score, he conjures forth all sorts of two-hour-plus running time. black magic, but his spectacle typically The 1999 original, which Universal involves the accidental recreation of Pictures loosely based on its own 1932 sequences from infinitely better movies horror classic, was no screen gem, but it such as Crouching Tiger, Hidden boasted a few fun moments and a glibly Dragon, -Aliens and Jurassic Park. Universal Pictures enjoyable aura of smart-aleck self-paro­ Choose- Your Weapon:- Brendan Fraser and Arnold Vosk>o are distracted during- battle in A silly bit where the cast finds dy. This Mummy, however, must highly The Mummy Returns, the high-budget sequel to one of 1999's big hits. themselves under assault from a blood- revere that Mummy, because it essen­ thirsty band of mummy Mini-Me's tially Xeroxes its predecessor's big action sigh-worthy, others seem distractingly the good guys - rugged adventurer Rick plays like Jim Henson's Mummy Babies, spectacles and "hip" sense of humor. When phony. When a giant computer-generated (Brendan Fraser) and spunky Egyptologist and a dumb deus ex machina ending drives you've seen a swaggering hero dispatch a insect creature goes on a climactic ram­ Evelyn (Rachel Weisz)- but they logisti­ the final nail into this movie's sarcophagus. dust-encrusted baddie once, the next 82 page, it looks all the world like . . . a giant cally should've been brought up in the first Though word of mouth is indicating a hit, instances aren't too fun. computer-generated insect creature going Mummy. Rick and Ev are saddled with a here's to hoping the future of the Mummy What No. 2 does do differently than No. on a climactic rampage. child (plucky Freddie Boath) for this out­ franchise stays under wraps. 1 is slather on even more special effects. And for those who actually care about ing, but they're lousy parents; after surviv­ There's hardly a single shot in The Mummy the cardboard chunks that pass for the ing a harrowing attack, a horny tongue kiss The Mummy Returns, at area theaters, is Returns that isn't aided by some technical series' characters, The Mummy Returns ranks a higher priority than checking on the rated PG-13 for language and comic-book enhancement, and while some sights are adds a few new twists to add complexity to welfare of their own flesh and blood. When violence.

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Certified Internet Webmaster (CIW) Cisco CCNA • MCPIMCSE Windows 2000 A+ • Network+ • i-Net+ Internet Specialist Office 2000 • Visual Basic • Oracle __ ,., E9IJCompTIA. c~w.. Technology Career Fair AN HOtiOitS UfUVIErtSITY IN MAffYLAJII) FREE opportunity for any technology job • CftJSOr,-= AUTHORIZED - CERTIFIED TRAINING seekers to meet with leading area emplOyers. Partner PftOVIDelt Computer Certification Thursday, May 31, 2001 • 4:30 - 7:30 pm Call 410-594-2282 for information Training Center THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES May 8, 2001 PAGE 21 The Magic of (Underground) Movies at Film Fest '01 from FESTNAL, page 16 Coffin Joe: The Strange World of Jose (East of Eden, The Killing, The Wild One) tation for being one of the most notorious Mojica Marins directs, writes and stars in one of the most underground films ever made" and, inter­ around and be a normal American boy Documentary filmmakers Andre bizarre mid-life crisis films ever made. If estingly enough, Carey uses the music of with parents from an entirely different Barcinski and Ivan Finotti exhibit the life you thought Lester Burnham (Kevin then unknown musician Frank Zappa, giv­ world. He continues that knowledge as he of Brazilian pop-culture icon and Spacy's character in American Beauty) ing him his first big break into show busi­ deceivingly studies music in college while cult/gore-filmmaker Jose Mojica Marins. had problems, wait until you meet ness. his parents believe he is studying pre-med. After growing up in movie theatres owned Clarence Hilliard. Hilliard decided that all The problem does not only lie at home for by his parents, Marins began making low­ people are divine and "super-human Each of the films screened at the Sureel; his band members and girlfriend budget gore flicks and quickly earning the beings." He estranges himself from his Maryland Film Festival represented tri­ decide they are tired of the hassles they reputation of one of the masters of the kind-hearted wife and children, starts up a umph. The triumph of the filmmakers' must endure to keep Sureel's life a secret genre. His classic character Coffin Joe has garage rock band and establishes his own perfection of their craft as well as the fes­ from his family and kick him to the curb. won him worldwide acclaim, yet his religion, deeming himself God and sewing tival's to exhibit these films for the entire However, with some determination, hope unusual life is what many find most inter­ it in his cuffs. Soon enough "God" sets his world to view. Director/Founder of the and help from new and first Indian girl­ esting (or disturbing) about him. Some of eyes on the presidency, and with the thou­ Maryland Film Festival states that "The friend, Maya, Sureel learns to blend and his 36 feature films have been censored or sands of followers he has gathered, it does one common link for every movie at this love both of his heritages and challenges banned by Brazil's military dictatorship. not seem like it will be hard to win the year's Festival is that it will never again be all of his obstacles in a national band com­ His tendencies to put his cast in life-threat­ election. Unfortunately, Timothy Carey's sb.own quite the way we will show it." petition. American Chai is a traditional ening danger to achieve realistic and dar­ self-made, low-budget masterpiece has This was certainly true at the festival. narrative style film with a not so tradition­ ing shots, the controversies surrounding never been released and has only been With the guest host program featuring al subject. Qefiantly recommended for any deaths on his sets and his fingernails that screened by Carey himself on rare occa­ such names as John Waters, Mayor Martin Indian-American college student, as well seem about six inches long, all make this sions. The screening at the film festival O'Malley and Ravens head coach Brian as anyone else who has had similar obsta­ life an extraordinary one to document and was hosted by Carey's son, Romeo CareY, -""Billick, who screened a private copy of cles. Just as the film deals with melting exciting to view. currently a production company owner. Clint Eastwood's Unforgiven, the Festival cultures, director Anurag Mehta inserts The World's Greatest Sinner has the "repu- has reached world-wide acclaim. humorously staged Indian film shots in The World's Greatest Sinner this charming and witty film. Legendary '60s actor Timothy Carey

hey, baby ••• what's your sign? nd in the end, the love you take amazement at nature and the world is equal to the love you make." around us, we'll never really get old. A-The Beatles Don't take the easy road just Aries (March 21-April 20): But I'm sure you can think of some­ Endings are always sad, except when because it's easy. Sometimes to get Surprisingly, your new bad-ass tattoo of thing. it's the ending of a root canal or a really what we really want from life, we gotta Friedrich Nietzsche is failing to win you bad case of diarrhea or something. Then go the rough route. Many times, people friends and influence. Ha ha. Nerd. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22): It suddenly they're ok. This column marks the final abandon their dreams just because they occurs to you that chain-smoking on the closing of The Curio Shoppe. Being the seem ridiculous and impossible. But Taurus (April 21-May 21): Having a UC steps all day every day is not con­ proprietor, this is a bittersweet day for that mindset is the biggest obstacle in tough week? Hang in there! At least you ducive to graduation. After pondering me. Although I've enjoyed my time here our way. Once we believe that we can don't [witty ending, possibly involving this for three hours over a pack of ciga­ at the Shoppe, I believe its time in the do anything, we can. So what if it's penguins, goes here] ... rettes, you realize you've missed two limelight has passed and it's ready to hard? In order to get to the highest classes. Oops. move on to greener pastures. highs, we gotta trudge through the low­ Gemini (May 22-June 21): The stars Remember that song "Sunscreen" est lows. see great misfortune in the future! Don't Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21): End-of­ with all those witty life lessons spoken Put things in perspective. At col­ go to that tractor pull this weekend! Just semester burnout. Find self incapable of over a snappy techno beat? Well, being lege, a lot of us drive ourselves crazy don't do it, man! forming grammatical sentences. the sap- that I am, I liked that song. I with work. We believe that if a test isn't Screwed on English exam. Dammit. thought it was sweet. And so, in this col­ aced, a paper isn't perfect, if we don't Cancer (June 22-July 23): Pay special umn's last breaths, I would like to relay get that A, then life as we know it will attention to your toenails today, as they Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 20): You've to you some of the lessons I have learned come to an end. Not so. Doing well is are likely to be far more interesting than been trying to get a horrible song out of during my stay here on Earth, and hope important, yes, but keeping sane is any of your academic pursuits. your head for three days now. Agreed, that they can help you as they have more important: Don't overwhelm it's probably maddening, but, for the helped me. If at any time you feel ill yourself. Leo (July 24-Aug. 23): You discover, love of God, put down the electric from my sentimentality, this newspaper Have Faith. Taking risks isn't easy. to your horror and confusion, that there knife! also conveniently doubles as a vomit It's hard to go against the grain and be are seventeen homeless people living in receptacle. But beware, ralphing in the the one who takes a different route than your pants. The perils of being a raver Aquarius (Jan. 21-Feb. 19): Is your paper may hinder your ability to read it everyone else. You feel like you're roommate always appearing at inoppor­ anymore. Well, you've been warned. bound to fail. You feel like you have no tune times? Are you never able to com­ Never take your loved ones for reassurance that your choice will end Virgo (Aug. 24-Sept. 23): Well, that's plete your sex acts or occult rituals? granted. Sure, maybe they're there all up being the right one. You wonder if what you get for vacuuming while lying Then try the new Instant Roommate the time. You see them every day. They you will look back on it and wish you down. Vaporizer (Not FDA approved.)! always listen when you complain about had just taken the well-beaten path and all your problems, but hey, they always not paved a new one without knowing Libra (Sept. 24-0ct. 23): Jupiter Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20): Need a do that. It's no biggie. Wrong. Just imag­ what obstacles would fall in your way. moves into saucy Virgo, which means quick pick-me-up? Have sex with a ine where you'd be without your friends, Getting through these times takes a hel­ . . . really, nothing at all of importance. Gemini! It really works! your family, your lover. Don't forget to luva lot of Faith. In a higher power, in show appreciation for what they do for yourself, in others, whatever it may be, you. Because as the overused cliche you need it. Believe that everything is by robin me adams says, you never know how much you've done for a reason. Because if you got until it's gone. choose from your heart, you can never See everything in life as if it were go wrong, no matter how crazy every­ the first time. If you've ever watched a one else may think you are. It is the anna is the features editor. little kid at the zoo, with a new toy or hardest battle that forges the greatest even just seeing a funky bug on the wall, hero. anna is cool. you'll know what I'm talking about. Thanks for a great year. anna needs writers. When you're a kid, the whole world is so amazing and interesting because it's all DISCLAIMER: If you've liked reading this you can be as cool as anna. new. As we grow older though, we start column throughout the year, I would love to taking the world for granted; we stop hear your comments. Please write me at fill out an application in UC 214. looking to the stars, stop smelling the [email protected]. Knowing that it will make anna cool and happy. roses. That's when life gets boring. If we even one person reads this is a trophy. can continually capture that childlike Adieu. PAGE 22 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES May 8, 2001 persijliige by trica smith

eHo, hello! .My name is Eri~ so close . *' and tben booDL Nova. and rn be your Persiflage S~ova. And tbe.o.~tb. Eyezything H writer today ... like I am every wollld ·bake where it stOod, and while ·· week. This week r had ~orne questions this may come in bandy if you're a from a nice Persiflage newcomer c8.ke~ to most things, it~s not good. named Lily Craie, who asks. "What's a So just keep your anti-sun com­ Persiflage? rm new here." Well. Lily ments to yourself before you ruin it for (and for those other shy newcomers). the rest of life in the solar system, "persiflage" is a word that means "idle okay? chat or banter. ·• I'd say it fits in the case J:et~• • m~fpLlblish~er~~rJ;equc~t, for some ,foot Ul<>ntbs now hu4ding fame with the of this column~ eh? .In any case, if ''What's the easiest way to contact tlnlt witnessed the col- you've questions for me, my e-mail a cel~brity?" -Lily .~ lf.U·1Jll.Th¢' ne~s fJtSt bit me one address is [email protected]. Step one: Do a good warmup, i,..,,, .,·J

no.va; just like other sf$'~. And do you ~p.gs like The fhattf.I?'!l Tollbooih1 ·· ktlow why? The sun .has a vecy~ very Mlitilt/Q. and CharlieandtheChrJColate bad temper. For awhjle now it's been Factory. I read a lot whe.n ·l was a kid, complacent because the planets and and still do. I read lots

byEric Se,gerson esegerl®umbc.edu www.arrive.to/el7 AFTER FOUR YEARS, KA5T£R, J[N, SPOCK, AN[) JACK L[AV£ COLL£G£ AND MOVE ON IN THEIR LlV£5. J f N AND 5POCK PERSU[ POCTORAT£5 AT SEPARATE UNIVERS­ ITI£5 OUT OF STAT[

WHILE KASTER TRI£5 HIS HAND IN THE REAL

Thursday, May 10 walking tour today from 10 a.m.-noon Pretty in Pink through this once-thriving industrial Remember the Psychedelic Furs? waterfront. Show up at the Canton They were a super-duper '80s synth Waterfront Park at 2900 Boston Street pop/new wave band that did the theme Saturday morning, or call (41 0) 235- song of Pretty in Pink and had anoth­ 7985. er hit with "Love My Way." Yeah, I thought they broke up a decade ago, Saturday, May 12 and Sunday, May too, but apparently not since they are 13 playing at Towson's Recher Theater Fun in Towson tonight at 7 p.m. to promote the This weekend, come wander the release of their new greatest hits streets of Towson during the 34th album. For more information and Annual Towsontown Spring Festival. tickets call TicketMaster at (41 0) 481- There will be food, arts and crafts, SEAT. live music and face painting. On Saturday, the action takes place from Friday, May 11 10 a.m.-6 p.m., while on Sunday it's 1 The Piano Lesson p.m.-6 p.m. Come on, what else are Tonight is the opening night for you going to do with your weekend Center Stage's latest production, The afternoons? Study for finals? Piano Lesson, which continues its run Whatever. For more information call until June 24. The play is set in (410) 825-1144. Pittsburgh during the Great Depression, and portrays the struggle Sunday, May 13 of a family trying to integrate their More '80s Music! past with their future. For more infor­ Now that you're all nostalgi~ about mation call (41 0) 332-0031. '80s music after seeing the Psychedelic Furs on Thursday, how Saturday, May 12 about checking out Bon J ovi tonight Can You Say Canton? at 7:30 at the MCI Center? That's Do you wonder about the history of right, one of the foremost bad boys of Baltimore's older neighborhoods? '80s rock is back with a vengeance. (You know that this city does extend Tease up your hair and dig the bad-ass beyond Arbutus, right?) If so, here is leather jacket out of the closet, kids, your chance to find out all you ever tonight we party like it's 1989! For wanted to know about Canton. more information and tickets call Historian Dean Krimmel and Canton TicketMaster at (410) 481-SEAT. - resident Nick Politkas are leading a Anna Kaplan PAGE 24 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY ADVERTISEMENT May 8, 2001 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY ADVERTISEMENT May 8, 2001 PAGE 25

,-II H ETRIEVER RWEci

rame to The llebieVer Weellbl's fUnfesl on lhe uc Plaza dUihl tree·•• on W8dneSllaV 519to win a pass (10011 lor two) to • IIIV.a screenila Passes and nes are available 1111111 supplies last. flo lllrcbisa niCISSarv. umn one per pers111. Employees or D1'88111Works PICblras, The Rllrln• WIRIJ and u•c are notlllalble. PAGE 26 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY ADVERTISEMENTS May 8, 2001

Invite vou and a u.u s to spec1a1 advance screening! Come to 111e Relriever WeeldV's FunFest on the uc Plaza during tree hour .on Wednesdav, Mav 9th to win a pass good for two to an advance screening. Passes and prizes are available while supplies last. No purchase necessary. Umit one per person. Employees ol 20th Century Fox, The Retriever WeeklY and UMBC are not eligible.

lnvile You To Give Your Mom · lhe sweetest Treat 1 All lhis Mother's oav ...

come to lhe Retriever WeeldV 's FunFest on me uc Plaza dunnu free hour on Wednesdav 5/9 to Win a pass (Uood for two) to su111nse vour molher and take her to see lhe lilm! ·

Passes and prizes are available while supplies last. No purchase necessarv. Umit one per person. Emplovees or Mlramax films. The Retriever WeekiV and UMBC are not eligible. May 8, 2001 PAGE 27 POR Dawgs Sweep Three Doubleheaders, Outscore Foes 53-13 Men's Baseball Moves into First Place Tie for Southern Division of Northeast Conference

ROXANNE REYES victory over UMBC was the sec­ run behind an RBI groundout to record his second save. offense. He continued to pitch a Retriever Weekly Staff Writer ond in two tries this season. from Chuck Easter, and held on UMBC's offensive attack was complete game and earned the The Retrievers scored first in to win the game with a final led by junior shortstop Jared win, improving his record to 2- With only three days remain­ the contest after an RBI fielder's score of 12-10. Boyd, who homered to right 3 on the season. ing until the NEC Tournament, choice by junior Greg Deboy Retriever right-fielder Greg field in the fifth inning, and Currently, the Retrievers are the Retriever baseball team, who allowed John Shuler to score in Deboy, who was recently named Chad Gerben, who had two hits batting a league-best .340, with won six of their last seven the opening inning. However, NEC Player of the Week (Week and an RBI. Boyd's homerun put eight regulars averaging over games, recently moved into a the 1-0 UMBC lead did not last 7/April 30), contributed much in the Dawgs up 3-2, while .300. Among the top ten in NEC first place tie with Monmouth in long as the Terps pounded the Mary land game, recording Gerben's two-out RBI double in batting are conference homerun the Southern division of the Retriever starter Ashley Roque four RBI's on three at-bats. the seventh secured the win for leader Scott Kosmicky (.397; NEC. Key victories within the for six runs on five hits in only Deboy, who batted .556 (10-18) UMBC, 4-2. 2nd), Boyd (.389; third), Deboy past week included UMBC's 1/3 of the first. with seven runs, six RBI, a dou­ In the nightcap, the four runs (.384; sixth) and junior outfield­ doubleheader sweeps over The Retrievers battled back ble, a triple and a homer the pre­ scored by the Retrievers in the er John Shuler (.380; ninth). In Quinnipiac, Central Connecticut by scoring four runs in the top of vious week, raised his average to fifth inning alone were enough addition, UMBC also ranks State and St. Francis (NY), in the third, making the score 5-6. .384 (sixth in the NEC), and has to complete the sweep over St. ninth nationally in hitting and which the Dawgs outscored their Not backing down, the Terrapins six home runs and 35 RBI on the Francis (22-20,12-8 NEC). 14th in runs scored. opponents by a combined 53-13. countered with a four-run inning season. Eight UMBC players went up to Entering the NEC Since only the top four teams in of their own, recreating another On Saturday, UMBC traveled bat in the busy inning, record­ Tournament, UMBC leads the the conference gain invites to the five-run lead. to New York and completed a ing four hits, while also taking conference with an overall win­ tournament, UMBC's 27-16-2 The Dawgs did not give up, doubleheader sweep of NEC advantage of a fielding error by ning percentage of .605. record ( 16-4 NEC) guarantees scoring two runs in the fifth and Northern Division leader St. the Terriers' centerfielder. After Trailing them are Central them a trip to the Sandcastle in three more in the sixth to tie the Francis with scores of 4-2 and 4- five innings, the Dawgs led 4-1. Connecticut State with .568, St. Atlantic City, NJ, on May 11-13. game at 10. Unfortunately, a 3. St. Francis threatened to tie Francis (NY) with .550, and In the past week, the Dawgs' bases loaded walk to Terrapin In game one, Retriever starter the game in the sixth, scoring Monmouth with .523. With only loss came on Tuesday, John McCurdy in the seventh Phil Hesler pitched 6 2/3 innings two on two hits, and narrowing recent sweeps of both CCSU when the Mary land Terrapins forced in the game-winning run of good baseball to earn his fifth UMBC's lead, 4-3. However, and St. Francis, the Retrievers (15-30) defeated the Retrievers to put the Terps up 10-11. win of the season, and Erik Retriever pitcher Mike Johnson remain favorites for the champi­ with a score of 10-12. The Terps' Maryland added an insurance Weltmer provided strong relief was able to stop the Terrier onship. UMBC Softball Eliminated in Game Five of NEC's

OWEN PALMQUIST five unanswered runs on the Retriever Weekly Staff Writer board. Determined not to be knocked out of the tournament The UMBC softball team yet, UMBC set its bats on fire. ended its season last weekend at Four runs in the fifth inning were the NEC championship. The team in great part due to a killer double lost the frrst game against Long by NEC First Team designated Island, and won the second hitter Stephanie Happel to bring against Robert Morris. The in two runs for the Retrievers. A Retrievers were eliminated form single by NEC First Team center the losers bracket by Monmouth fielder Lisa Boone brought NEC in game five. First Team short stop Deanna UMBC started the champi­ Vecchio in for another run. The onship against host team, the final run of the game came from Long Island University NEC First Team third base Blackbirds. LIU came out swing­ Vickie Buissetman on a single by ing capitalizing on a walk and a junior catcher Bonnie Nevin. The triple to bring two runners home game ended 8-5 in UMBC's in the frrst inning. The Retrievers favor and eliminating Robert dug deep and kept LIU from see­ Morris from the tournament. ing the plate again for the rest of The next day found UMBC the game. Unfortunately, LIU was pitted against Monmouth in only too happy to return the favor. game five of the tournament. The Blackbirds' defense all but Both teams had lost a game, shut down the Retriever offense. which mean that the loser was The only hit of the game came going home. A run by Lisa from sophomore Christy Boone in the third inning broke Sheppard, who bounced a ball the scoreboard open, however, it over the fence and advanced to was answered in the bottom of second base. Unfortunately, she the frame by Monmouth tying could get no farther before the the score at 1-1. The two teams third out. remained in gridlock through the The game ended with a fmal end of the seventh inning and the score of 2-0. first of the extra innings. In the Defeated, but not broken, ninth inning a wild pitch brought UMBC moved on for a second in a second Monmouth runner game against Robert Morris. By and ending the tournament for the end of the fourth inning UMBC with a final score 2-1. File Photo UMBC found itself in very deep The Retrievers end the season Three Strikes: The softball team's season ended over the weekend as they were knocked out of trouble. Robert Morris had put with an overall record of 26-19. the NEC Tournament. PAGE 28 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY SPORTS May 8, 2001 FROM THE-BlEACHER SEATS PRATIK SHAH ·uMBC Athletics: Year in Review In my two years doing sports editing Central Connecticut In the previous two this year proved no different. Men's strokes. Head coach Pat Kotten also took work, I have seen UMBC Athletics seasons, the Blue Devils had knocked out lacro~se opened the season with an impres­ home Coach of the Year honors after through ups and downs. But this season the Retrievers in the NBC Tournament but sive victory over Navy but ended the sea- guiding his men to yet another title. marked a memorable year for Retriever UMBC got revenge son on a slide. UMBC's Junior Cleopatra Borel highlighted sports with numerous accolades. after knocking out. the yopng, talented athletes . UMBC's track season. Borel became the Mehdi Addadi became UMBC's first defending conference my years will be .looked to lead ··· first female track athlete to compete in athlete to compete in the Summer champs 59-44. before uln two doing the team ·· next season# the NCAA Outdoor Track and Field Olympics in Sydney. Representing losing to the eventual sports _editing work, l Women's lacrosse also Championships after a throw of 53'6" in Algeria, Addadi performed well in· the champion, Monmouth. liave seen UMBC had high expectations the shot put. The All-American had the butterfly events. This season. the junior Freshman Peter for themselves. After fourth longest throw in the shot put in the also was named ECAC's Outstanding Mulligan also proved'to Athletics tlirough ups winni~g 'the NE!c·s two ~ country this season. Male Swimmer. Junior Jen Ecker also be a valuable addition .and tlowns. But this years in a row, the After enduring a coaching change to received individual -honors this year after to the squad after earn..; RetfieversJell ju~t shoJ1 Jean Battista late in the offseason; the earning First-Team All-Academic honors ing Newcomer of the of a thr~peat falling to Retrlevers rallied together to fmish fourth becoming the first female athlete to do so Year honors to the Monmouth in the ;~nals. in .. the regular season in softball. The at UMBC. The junior holds a 4.0 OPA in NEe. --· The .. women's bOth ···· team, whidfwas able to come ·away with Biology -and was one of 15 athletes that team. also _improved the NEC Totirnament title a year ago, fell were named to this y~ar's ~~ · greaqy from;,a se~~n to ~opmo~tlt to en(! their season. ~ The fall season also marked the return - ago. After ftilishing 'in this year's surprise team may be the ' of Ul\.ffiC,s natio.qally J"~~ed . ~?Ccer the lower .half of .• l:h~ b~eball sq~ad. They currently are in team. After an undefeated .. season i year fit~t : place ~ and .. clinched the South ago suffering an overtime_loss to __ top­ ' ' Division title after their weekend wins. · ranked Dukeen the key '9 this ' .. Fairleigh Dickinson; the team had several ~...... , s11ec1ess. Ko,smicky··· has been in play~rs be

~ ' RooT, ROoT, RooT F()RTHE HoME TEAM (IF THEY DoN'T VVtN, SoMEONE ELSE WtLL) By: Brett McKenJie

As a die-hard major league baseball To the naked eye (or ear, as the case may have been to many home games in New while his .father shouted after the heck­ fan, r ve attended dozens of games all have been), there would've appeared to be York and have never seen an away fan lers "hey, don't ruin this for our kids, over this country and, except for what more Yankee fans than Orioles fans at the treated in an overtly inapprop~ate man­ come on!.. While this was the most goes on in the field, all games are vir~ game. With over 47,000 in·atte:ndance on ner. I was, for the most part, treated with extreme instance that I observed, I tually the same. Spirited fans roam the Saturday alqne, two conclusions can be much respect by Orioles fans... well, understand that the rivalry between the stadium clad in hometown colors, drawn. Either the Yankees have achieved except for that one drunk: guy sitting next Yanks and the O's is not as strong as obnoxious vendors sell hot dogs and extraordinary road game attendance or the to me who leaned over and shouted) .. Go many. At New York Mets/Atlanta peanuts at ridiculous prices, and that Orioles fans are lacking some serious home, yankee!" into my left ear during a Braves games, Mets fans have been one drunk guy always manages to sit spirit. Yankees double play. Athough an air* caught hurling cups and other objects at right behind you and yell a little too It appears as though Yankees fans are plane did fly over the stadium trailing the John Rocker in "retaliation" for some loudly at no one in particular. Ah, louder. and more enthusiastic than the message, "Hey NY, Here's a Reminder: racist comments he made about New baseball. The whole fan experience courteous and refined Orioles fans. Every Ravens, 34, Giants, 7'~ during random Yorkers. Fans have broken out into fist itself is almost as important as who time a,'Yankee got a hit or a yankee pitch­ intervals of the game. This didn't insult fights over suchissues. wins the game. er struck someone out, the crowd would me., it just made me happy that Baltimore Let's just admit it. No one wants to This weekend, I attended my first resound with traditional Yankee cheers. has atleasto.ne team thatthey 're proud of. let someone come into their house and

game at the beautiful Camden Yards Only once1 when prompted. by the .large After observing the near dead-silence of push them. around. In a perfect world, and I was, to say the very least, aston­ screen aqd hyperactive mascot> did the Orioles fans, I'd been starting to wonder. baseball stadiums would be packed with - ished. Not so much at the sparkling Orioles fans even attempt a half-hearted There is a line that can and must be only hometown fans and the home team cleanliness of the entire stadium. the '~Let's Go O's.~' Yet when ihe Yankees drawn betweeq a healthy r;ivalty and hurt­ would win every time. But that's not delicious and decadent food options or fans c~eered, scattered O's fans would ful ~havior. For instance, after the game, baseball. Thafs not any sport. A big the incredibly polite ushers and staff; shout; ''Go home!" or ••Yankees suck!" l waited Qutside the stadium for the part. of major league fun is the competi­ The factor that shocked me the most Why wer.p the loudest cheet;s the negative opportunity to meet some Yankees play.. tion. It's. why everyone loyes to be at the was the overwhelming number of fans ones? Be~ng a sports fap is about sup­ ers. Amongst the crowd were many game where the players throw punches donning New York Yankees baseball porting your team, not belittling your yourH~ children in their undersized at each Qther or the umpires and man­ caps similar to the one I was wearing. comnetitors. Spirited,. enthusiastic, Yankees gear holding baseball cards and agers scream. over a bad call. Healthy Everywhere I looked, Derek Jeter and proud. Th,ose are the traits ppssessed by a balLs with the hopes o£ receiving auto­ con:tpetition amongst fans .is to be Tino .Martinez jerseys jumped out from true Yankees fan. T understand . that at grap,hs . • While we waited; a group of expe<;ted. Who can yell the loudest. .the s~a .of navy blue. lf:lt as though bofii~.g~~~ in-the Bro~r Y~, ~upport­ Orip!~s fans came 't>,y <3;n~ .·.·shouted, 'fYho's got the best shortstop, who·s got J?d just wandered off th~ .... J;lew York ets .. ; at~ ~ofi)etjmes le$S th~ l~~$~itaole to f\«:;'\~Ss(lckl Get qqtt~h~!¥ , F' ,Qp,e ,)jt­ the 'tll9St spirit, But sotne:tiJ:nes, it's best subway and found myself in the Bronx. away.; !~·fans, Oriql~s iqgi~(J.eg,.z .But I flq ~~ . burst .iqto teats rig}l(. ge;~t . tQ p:te toletihe :fighting·~. dotte on the. field.

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J L PAGE 30 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY SPORTS May 8, 2001 Women Drop First Ever in NEC Tournament from WLAX, page 36 midfielders Lauren Traber and Stephanie Allen scored a goal apiece to bring the 9-8. score within four, 12-8, but that was as The Dawgs next faced Monmouth on close as the Retrievers would come for the Saturday, May 5. Things did not start out rest of the game before losing 14-9 well for the Retrievers, as Northeast For UMBC, Pickett, Traber, and Gerhart Conference Player of the Year and scored two goals each. Allen and junior Tournament Most Valuable Player Heather midfielder Ashley Staines scored a goal Bryan scored a goal just 52 seconds into apiece, and Tirocchi was limited to just one the game. Each time that UMBC evened goal. for the game. Monmouth's Bryan the score, Bryan would come up with ended with six goals. another goal, constantly leaving the Dawgs UMBC took 31 shots on goal, while to play catch-up. Bryan's goal with 22:37 Monmouth took 26. Jagoda made 12 saves left in the half to put Monmouth up 3-2, and the Monmouth goalie made 12. UMBC then again with 13:29left to put them up 5- had nine caused turnovers while 4. Monmouth was up 6-4 when Bryan Monmouth had 17, and UMBC had 17 added another goal at the end of the half to turnovers and Monmouth had 13. UMBC go into intermission 7-4. made two of six free position shots while Bryan stayed hot in the second half, Monmouth made two of four. UMBC scoring just over three minutes into it to returned to form in draw controls, winning make it 8-4 with 27:50 left. Tirocchi scored 15 while Monmouth had eight. with 22:04 left in the half to trim the Monmouth moves on to the NCAA Monmouth lead to 8-5, but three more tournament now, as this was the first year Hawk goals would put the score at 11-5. that the NEC champion received an auto­ File Photo Pickett would trade goals with Monmouth matic bid for the tournament. The Streak Stopped: The Women's lacrosse NEC Championship streak was stopped with 16:19 remaining to take it to 12-6. Retrievers return home to ready for next at three by Monmouth over the weekend. With 13:00 left in the game, sophomore season. Terrapins Pound Men's LacrOsse to End Season 5-7

PRATIK S. SHAH quarter as junior midfielder Charlie Gibson Retriever Weekly Editorial Staff scored on an unassisted goal, his first of four on the day tallying all Retriever The Retrievers late season slide finally scores. Gibson's goal would be the ended last Saturday. The Dawgs endured a Retrievers lone tally until his second goal 14-4 drubbing to the No. 6 University of with 4:39 remaining in the second quarter. Maryland-College Park Terrapins to end By that time, College Park had run up the their season with a 5-7 record. UMBC score to 5-2. The Terps defense stifled opened the season with a 4-1 record includ­ UMBC all day limiting the Dawgs to just ing an impressive ECAC victory over then two shots over the second and third quarter No. 12 Navy. The impressive victory for including no shots in the third period. the 13-2 Terrapins should give them a first­ Combs would score his third goal of the round bye in the NCAA Tournament start­ first half with two minutes remaining to ing next week. Unfortunately for No. 20 give the Terrapins a 6-2 halftime edge. The UMBC, their seven losses this season will third quarter wrote the same story as not be good enough to make the tourney College Park scored seven unanswered but will look to next season to continue goals into the fourth quarter. Combs tallied their success as in years past. his fourth and fifth of the game while On the senior day for the Terrapins, nine Gibson would score his third of the game players scored goals including 14 players just under ten minutes remaining in the getting into the scoring column. The day contest. Gibson capped off the game's scor­ was especial! y big for Terps attackman ing with his fourth goal with an assist from Andrew Combs. The Baltimore native tal­ senior Josh Hahn. Hahn ended his lied six points netting five goals and an Retriever career as one of the top-scorers in assist to surpass the 100-point plateau for UMBC history. File Photo his career. Combs opened the scoring at the The Terps outshot the Retrievers, 34- Season Over: The Maryland Terrapins handed the Retrievers their worst loss of 11:20 mark with an assist from freshman 16, while capturing 51 groundballs, the the season, a 14-4 setback. Dan LaMonica. LaMonica tallied a career­ third straight game they have passed the high five assists, also a season high for the 50-groundball plateau. Gibson's four Tewaaraton Trophy, given to the nation's game for UMBC. Terps. goals came against arguably the best net­ best college player. The senior made four UMBC Stadium will play host to The Retrievers would get onto the board minder in the country in Pat McGinnis. saves in the cage while Retriever goalie NCAA Tournament first-round action with just over two minutes left in the first McGinnis is a candidate for the Steve Cusa stopped 10 saves in his final starting on May 12.

-+ THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY SPORTS May 8, 2001 PAGE 31

I!] (!] UMBC'S SILENT MAJORITYI

''Near'' Campus Stu.dents ••• Where are you?

if you live near UMBC,s campus or plan to move in an apartment complex along the Shuttle Bus route, stop by the Commuter Student Services & Off Campus Living Office at UC 207 PAGE 32 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY SPORTS May 8, 2001 UMBC STATISTICS Men•s Lacrosse Box score . WonaJ•s Lacrosse au Score UMBC @ College Park 05/05/01 UMBC@ Wagner 05/03/01

Score by Quarters 2 3 4 Total Score By Half 2 Final UMBC 0 4 Wagner 2 3 5 Maryland 2 4 5 3 14 UMBC 2 8 1 0

Goals: Assists: UMBC- Gibson 4-0 Berry 0-1, Hahn 0-1 Maryland- Combs 5-1, Goals: wa·gner - Krissie Fischer (2), Julie Rudderow, Jackie Losquadro, Iamonica 0-5, Poole 2-0, dauge 1-1, Gillete 1-0, Howley 1-0, MLamonica 1-0, Lindsay Maynard UMBC- Renee Tirocchi (4), Jamie Gerhart (2), Katie Pickett, Malone, 1-0, Rullman 1-0, Watkins 1-0, Healy 1-0, Hochstadt 0-1 ,morsel! 0-1 Shannon Gallup, Jen Dragoni, Amanda Eldridge Saves: Maryland - Pat McGinnis 4-44:40 Dan McCormick 6-15:20 UMBC: Steve Assists: Wagner - Krissie Fischer (2)UMBC - Jamie Gerhart, Beth Milani Cusa 10-59:18 Ethan Harris 0-0:42 Shots: UMBC- 38 Wagner- 18 Groundballs: UMBC- 33 Maryland- 51 Groundballs: UMBC- 30 Wagner- 33 Shots: UMBC - 16 Maryland - 34 UMBC (Jagoda) - 6 Wagn_er (Jones) - 19

Softball Box score

Softball Box Score UMBC @ Monmouth 05/05/01 1 Princeton ( 10-1) Player AB R H RBI BB so 2 Syracuse (1 0-2) 3 Johns Hopkins (7 -3) Vecchio, Deanna ss ...... 4 0 0 0 0 0 Sheppard, Christy 2b ..... 4 0 0 0 0 4 Notre Dame {11-1} Boone, Lisa ct ...... 4 1 0 0 0 5 Georgetown (11-1) Happel, Stephanie c ...... 4 0 0 0 0 Buisset, Vicky 3b ...... 4 0 1 0 0 0 6 Maryland (11-2) Nevin, Bonnie dh ...... 3 0 0 0 1 1 7 Loyola (9-2) Gallignani, Lisa rf ...... 4 0 0 0 0 0 Mason, Aimee 1b ...... 3 0 1 0 0 0 8 Massachusetts (10-2) Kahn, Abbie If ...... 3 0 0 0 0 0 9 Towson (1 0-3) Amedro, Angie p ...... 0 0 0 0 0 0 Totals ...... 33 5 0 10 Bucknell (10-3)

11 Hofstra (8-5) Monmouth 2 (28-20) 12 Duke (10-5) Player AB R H RBI BB so 13 Navy (8-5)

Schramm, Mandy 2b ...... 4 1 0 0 14 Virginia (6-6) Petrocelli, Paula ct ..... 4 0 1 0 0 0 15 Penn State (6-6) Soares, Maryann c ...... 4 0 2 0 0 1 Reuter, Scarlett p/dh .... 4 0 0 1 0 0 16 North Carolina (6-6) Lombardi, Kim dh/p ...... 4 0 3 0 0 0 17 Cornell (7-5) · Costello, Angela pr..... 0 1 0 0 0 0 Connell, Elissa 3b ...... 2 0 0 0 0 0 18 Army (6-6) Schramm, Stacey ss ...... 3 0 0 0 19 Rutgers (5-6) Lascar, Tammy If ...... 2 0 0 0 1 2 Lyall, Colleen ph ...... 1 0 0 0 0 0 20 UMBC (5-6) Tyska, Steffanie rf ...... 4 0 2 0 0 0 Lyman, Shannon 1b ...... 0 0 0 0 0 0 Totals ...... 32 2 10 2 4 WOIIIII ..S l.acrossa Box Score Score by Innings R H E UMBC @.Monmouth 05/05/01 UMBC 001 000 000- 5 3 Monmouth. 001 000001- 2 10 Score By Half 2 Final UMBC 4 5 9 By the rtnbers Monmouth 7 7 14

3 - # of consecutive NEC crowns for men's golf after last weekend. Goals: UMBC - Katie Pickett (2), Jamie Gerhart (2), Lauren Traber (2), 8.8 - average number of runs the baseball team managed in its three doubleheader sweeeps last week. Stephanie Allen, Ashley Staines, Renee Tirocchi Monmouth - Heather Bryan 4 - Charlie Gibson's goal-scoring total versus College Park in 14-4 defeat. (6), Meg Brown (3), Cheri Brooks, Lisa Cherill, Stacy Sydlo, Stephenie LaGrossa, Rebekah Murphy TheY said n Assists: UMBC -Allen, Staines, Tirocchi, Beth Milani Monmouth - Heather Bryan, Colleen Murphy "It was very good for our program ... Coach works very hard and goes out of his way to make Shots: UMBC- 31 Monmouth- 26 sure we have what we need, so it was very deserving of him." Groundballs: UMBC - 32 Monmouth - 36 -Senior Dan Davey on NEC Coach of the Year Pat Kotten Saves: UMBC (Jagoda)- 14 Monmouth (Makris)- 12 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY ADVERTISMENT May 8, 2001 PAGE 33

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Classified Classified T H E Club Notices Lost & Found Advertising Display ETRIEVER UMBC student clubs A free service offered Advertising may make announce­ to UMBC students, $6 per 30 words R WEEKLY ments only in this faculty and staff. $0.50 per bold word $20 per column inch section. Five lines are Limit 5 lines. $20 for advertise­ University Center 214 free, each additional Does not include: ments under 20 col­ 1000 Hilltop Circle line costs $1.50. Personals PERSONALS, LOST umn inches Baltimore, MD 21250 The cost is $1 for a & FOUND, CLUB (410) 455-1260 four-line ad and 25 NOTICES or All classified display (410) 455-1265 (FAX) Thrift Shop cents for each addi- Mon.-Fri. 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. A service for current tional line. Ads in all THRIFT SHOP. advertisements UMBC students pro­ See separate rate under $30 must viding three free capital letters or schedules on this be prepaid Classifieds are due at 4:30 p.m. on lines of advertising including bold lines page for more before insertion in the Friday preceeding the issue and for any item for safe cost an additional 50 may be placed online by going to uni­ under $50. cents. information. The Retriever Weekly. versaladvertising. com. ! • • . . . . Wed. and Sun. See Web for more LICENSED CHILD CARE ON HELP WANTED MERENGUE! Starts Chess Club meets every Friday info. http :1/sta. umbc. edu/-aikido CAMPUS Sunday, Feb. 11 at Fitness Studio afternoon 4-6 p.m. in UC 310 for For children ages 2-5; full and After School Child Care in RAC Contact informal games, conversation and GENESIS TOASTMASTERS part-time, affordable care avail­ Light housework and after school ballroom@ sta. umbc.edu instruction. Everyone is welcome, Learn to build confidence and able on UMBC campus. child care, Columbia. $1 0/hour, from beginner to grandmaster. shape up your communication Campus Child Care 410-455- paid time off. 3-7 pm, 4 UMBC Ballroom Dance Club www. umbc. edu/chess, skills. every Tuesday 7-8p.m. days/week (option of more 6830 Ballroom Dance Classes Chess Club@ umbc. edu, x8499 Academic Building Room 010 durinig summer). Non-smoker. Wednesday Nights at UC VISIT http :1/sta. umbc. edul-gene­ Your transportation. CLUB NOTICES Ballroom Starting Wed, Feb. 7. Come join the Freedom Alliance, sisl OR e-mail 410-531-9066 Contact ballroom@ sta. umbc. edu UMBC's Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, [email protected]. Join the UMBC Pagan Student Waltz! Rumba! Swing! Transgender, Allies Group, every CHILDCARE NEEDED Association! Open to all pagans Thursday in SS 002 from 7:30 to Metamorphosis. Be Transformed Childcare for newborn, and open-minded non-pagans. The Men's Rugby Club practices 9 p.m.. Contact us at x6370 or 3/23/01-3/25/01. Contact hours/days flexible, salary nego­ For more information: http://wel­ Tuesday and Thursday from 4-6 freedom@ sta. umbc.edu. [email protected]. Sponsored by tiable, approx 10 hours per week, come. to/umbcpagans. email: p.m. at the Pit, directly across the UMBC Agape Campus Ministry. experience & reliable transporta­ umbcpagans@ hotmai l. com basketball courts, behind the Join the UMBC JuJitsu Club tion required. Permanent position Phone: (410) 772-5440 Blessed dorms.. No experience necessary. http://sta.umbcedui-jujits.u/e­ College Republicans to start in July. Be! Call Kevin at x7265 or e-mail mail:jujitsu@ sta. umbc. edu. Meetings held Wed., 1:OOpm. Contact Bridgette 410-895-1523 kbeck@ gl.umbc.edu with any Please contact Leanne at x7221 UMBC Ballroom Dance Club questions. Join UMBC Aikido Club. Meets: or [email protected] PAGE 36 May 8, 2001

Baseball heads into confer­ Brett McKenzie looks at the 2 9 27 ence play in first place in NY side of the Yankees-O's Southern Division POR Rivalry Retriever Men's Golf Wins Third Straight NEC Title Head_Coach Receives NEC Coach of the Year, Freshman Wins Individual Title respectively. in the two-day tournament. Last BRANDON DUDLEY year's hero, Mike Ball, tied for Retriever Weekly Editorial Staff "It was a good end to the sea­ son," said Senior Dan Davey. ninth with a 76+80=156. "I was happy with the way I The Retriever men's golf team "We hadn't played exceptionally played," said Davey. "It was my won its third straight NEC well all season so it was a good Championship over an 11 school end to win the conference; it felt last tournament and it was the way I wanted to go out. Making field on April 30-May 1 at the good." Waverly Woods course in Freshman Seth Unterschute the conference team was some­ thing I wanted to do." The top ten Baltimore. The Retrievers had to was the tournament champion, hold off a strong Central with a 71 on the first day, and a scorers in the conference are named to the All-Conference Connecticut State rally on the 76 on the second day, for a three final day. The win for UMBC over 147. His opening day 71 (-1) team. was. their third straight title in the was the only scqre below par for The closest Retreiver to them was sophomore Dan Repath, who conference and also the third time the entire tournament. in a row that a UMBC player was Unterschute is the third straight placed thirtieth with an 85+80= 165. Following him was given top individual honors. UMBC player and the second The Retrievers shot a 302 the straight UMBC freshman to win freshman Adam Falco in a three- first day and 315 the second day the tournament, after sophomore way tie for 31st place with an 85- for a 617 total, two better than teammate Mike Ball set an NEC 81=166. Central Connecticut. Robert tournament record 140 ( -4) last In addition to the win, Morris placed third, Long Island year and Tim Walko won it three Retriever coach Pat Kotten was and Sacred Heart tied for fourth, years ago. "He's a really talented selected as NEC coach of the St. Francis (PA) beat out player and it was really good to year for the second time in three Monmouth for sixth place, while see him come through and win," years. "It was very good for our Quinnipiac and Wagner placed said Davey. program,' said Davey. "Coach eighth and ninth respectively. Unterschute was named to the works very hard and goes out of Mount St. Mary's and Farleigh All-Conference team, along with his way to see that we have what Courlesy of UMBC Athlelics Dickinson rounded out the field senior Dan Davey, who came. in we need, so it was very deserving Above Par: Men's Golf brought home their third straight NEC with the tenth and eleventh spots, fifth place shooting a 74+79=153 of him." Championship after defeating an 11 opponent field. Dawgs Miss Chance to Move to NCAA's After Monmouth Loss

BRANDON DUDLEY a goal by senior attacker Amanda defenseman, and attacker Retriever Weekly EditorialStaff Eldridge just 2:30 into it. Gerhart Amanda Eldridge, as well as jun­ would score an unassisted goal ior attacker Shannon Gallup. The NEC women's lacrosse just a few minutes later, with Senior inidfielder Beth Milani tournament was held May 3 and 21:14 remaining, to put UMBC added one assist. 5, and the Retriever team came up 4-2. The next ten minutes Senior goalie Amy Jagoda home without an NEC would be scoreless, until Tirocchi faced 18 shots while in the net and Championship trophy for the first would score two straight goals in had six saves. Her Wagner coun­ time in 4 years. The Retrievers just over a minute, putting the terpart faced 38 shots and made lost in the final to Monmouth, 14- Retrievers up 6-2 with just under 19 saves. Wagner had 11 caused 9, after beating Wagner 10-5 in 10 minutes left in play. The turnovers, while UMBC had nine. the semifinal round. This was the Retrievers would pad their lead Wagner had 31 turnovers total, fourth year in a row that the with four more goals, while and UMBC had 19.UMBC con­ Retrievers faced Monmouth in the Wagner would only get three verted 2 of their six free position championship game and the loss more as UMBC won 10-5. shots while Wagner converted was the first time .UMBC has not Tirocchi led the Retriever neither of its two. Wagner outdid won the conference championship offense with four goals and UMBC in draw control, though, since the NEC began sponsoring Gerhart added two goals and an women's lacrosse in 1998. assist. Dragoni added one goal, as The fust half against Wagner did seniors Katie Pickett, a see WIAX, page 30 was low scoring, quite unlike the usual Retriever offense. Wagner players Krissie Fischer and Julie Rudderow scored the first two goals of the half with 22:12 remaining. The Retrievers would Men's Lacrosse answer back, as senior midfielder Renee Tirocchi scored an unas­ sisted goal and freshman attacker Jen Dragoni would score on a free Nate West I Retriever Weekly Staff position. Baseball To the Finish Line: Senior Eric Benjamin, in his last race as UMBC returned to its usual • a Retriever, led men's track in placing eighth at last week­ style in the second half. The Frl-111111-13 IE Tournament ( end's NEC Championships. The UMBC star of the event was Dawg's took control of the half junior Cleopatra Borel being named Outstanding Female early after a pass from junior mid­ Athlete. The women finished in fourth place. B fielder Jamie Gerhart ended with