incorporating blurbifILYCO magazine -rjE'111111 February 10, 19951 Is this Britain's fittest man? The inside trapeL jloger Black . LILLEY BLOCKS STUDENT'S COMPUTER MESSAGES Minister sparks

InternetBY TIM GALLAGHER libel row A CABINET Minister has moved to prevent a Leeds student publicly insulting him on the internet computer system. Social Security Secretary Peter Lilley contacted Leeds University FACTION bosses to warn the student his internet messages could result in legal action being taken against him. Finalist Torn Whitwell had been using the internet to voice opinions FINALIST HEROES about an article which appeared in Scallywag. the controversial political Kind-hearted magazine. SILENCED students, working The content of the student's communications. which cannot be revealed for Leeds for legal reasons, was monitored in London. Community Action, Whitehall officials then acted speedily to BY TORY HQ trace the source. have just won a "The Vice-Chancellor was contacted by prestigious award Peter Lilley's office.- a university OFFICIALS for helping local spokeswoman said. "We were told that a libellous message concerning Peter Utley kids and the Last night Department of Social Security and another Member of Parliament had homeless appeased on the Internet. sources refused to confirm or deny that "They were treating the matter very further action would be taken against the Full story: page 5 Politics and Parliamentary Studies student. seriously." 'Meet the volunteers': Whitwell realised the gravity of his Whitwell's course tutor, Dr Kevin mistake when he overheard two tutors Theakston, said: "Events in students' private pages 10-11 talking about the incident. "t immediately lives are their own responsibility I cannot posted up a retraction and an apology on the comment about this incident." internet," he said. But union chiefs claim the move by Lilley is a disgrace "The university was forced to UNDER FIRE: act on orders and police its students," said Ellie Clement. Administration Secretary at Peter Lilley LUU. "The internet is supposed to be (left) reacted liberating and the idea that Tory HQ is quickly to monitoring it is outrageous." quash The libel laws surrounding the internet are vague. Brian Kelly, of the university's controversial Computing Services department. said: comments "There have been no test cases in this made by a country The Government has been Leeds student monitoring the Internet for years. People using the need to realise that it's not an open forum for their views." Information super highway See Comment: pages 6-7

INSIDE: News 1-5, Comment 6-7, Music 8-9, Feature 10-11, Arts 1 2-1 3, Books 14, Election 16-17, Sport 18-20. Plus 12 page blurb pullout

2 LEDS STUDENT Friday February “1, 095 NEWS ANONYMOUS MARKING GETS TOP MARKS THE introduction of snorts mous marking at Leeds By 1-141WAIM 1-10Cias University has led to calls for the system to be introduced at LMU. when they receive their exam results. This is especially true The new system, where the candidate's name can he of Course Reps who feel that they will be discriminated hidden, is said to be favoured because it reduces the against because of what they have said during the year. possibility of racial and sexual bias and lifts suspicion from The technicalities of implementing it is an issue with e 'can' markers. which the university is concerned:- Jeanette McCabe. of the Examinations section of the She pointed out that it had been very successful at other Taught Courses office, said that the new system had not universities. including a section of Beckett Park. and that it hecn brought in throughout the university. could save the university a lot of money as there would he -It is up to each individual department to decide whether less disciplinary procedures by disgruntled students. Thus a to use the option of anonymous marking or not." She said pilot project may he in the offing at LMU in the near future. dial it had been brought in partly due to its increasing use at "LMUSU supports anonymous marking; equality of other universities. opportunities should be of the first importance," she added However, the move has led members of LMUSU Exec to The new marking system has not however been brought for it to be introduced at LMU. in at LMU. A spokesperson said: "The Academic hoard has Camille Bentley, VP Education and Campaigns at discussed the issue of anonymous marking and has set up a Cartoon: Tonic LMUSU, said:"A lot of students feel discriminated against working party to consider the matter further."

Leeds Student is an independent newspaper serving students at Leeds Mystery of missing hall University. Leeds Metropolitan Univosity and other colleges an and • around Limits All our journalists abide by a DREAM DISH FOR VEGETARIAN CHEF cock of conduct. but if you have any prohlems, please president contact the Edam BI 1'11! SMITH Lend, Stant, Newspaper A HALL president has disappeared leaving friends l., it. Unhenar. Union 00 Boa t$7 concerned and university bosses in a state of LEEDS contusion. 1titltH Graeme Doak, president of Sugarwell Court. has not been seen by Editor fellow residents for more than a fortnight. prompting speculation over 'rim Gallagher his departure. Deputy Editor There arc even claims that Doak Matt Ihnarr was evicted by LW/ after it teamed `FRAUD he was no longer registered as a Arta Editors student and had been living at Maaliew Gr Sugluwell undo- false pretences STUDENT' Hannah Jour% Friends at the hall remain puzzled ne-anor Row and concerned at the loss of their Blurb Editor elected representative. whose present PRESIDENT [maven Ridgway whereabouts are unknown. "It's quite upsetting that we have Books Edit les no one to go to with our problems." DISAPPEARS Ian Darby said Joanna Hould. a first year Pubh, hinathatt Gibbs Relations student at Sugarwell. of the situation. saying that the matter "Graeme was very helpful if we had is still under investigation_ But Leeds Comment&Aintlysis Student understands that the university Ameba 11,11 any trouble." Staff at I.Mlf deny any knowledge removed Doak after discovering he is Features Editor not actually enrolled as a student. Gareth Hughes "Graeme Doak lost his place on his Assistants course at the end of last year and has hair Scragg no right to live in a university hall," Karr loon said a source close to LMUSU Exec. Plc: Harriet Lee "It happens sir rarely that the COOKABILITY: Joanna with her diploma Food&Drink Editor university allowed him to slip through A VEGETARIAN cooked up a dream dish when she and prepare an exotic three course meal for her final Rob Conway the net and even assume a position of became the world's youngest ever 'Cordon Vert' exam, -We started at nine every morning and finished Music Editors responsibility. vegetarian chef. writes Tanya Veingani. at nine at night. We had to reach a very high Nick Moffat "The residents there have been Nineteen-year-old Joanna Ridgeway. a first year standard." Akin °jump looking up to a president who was Textile Management student at Leeds University. was The only other school offering the course is in Steven Ranger actually a fraud." awarded the coveted 'Cordon Vert Diploma' from the New York and Joanna is the youngest of the 40 Both the departmental head and Vegetarian Society's school of excellence in people who have so far graduated worldwide. News Editors "I am now qualified to teach vegetarian catering Graeme Doak Mike Wilkinson. Secretary of LMU. Altrincham. Paul Greenough were unavailable for comment. Joanna had to complete a tough four week course and eventually I want my own vegetarian restaurant." David Smith Nicola Wonlo-vi..

Science Editor Steve Hill Polling position Sports Editor Ion iinklian ELECTION fever hits students this THE JOLLY BREWER week as a huge number of candidates BY CHARLOTTE LONIA5 Picture Editor hope to become union leaders. (a.k.a. The Newlands, Hyde Park Road) lid Crispin The number of 17 candidates at students will vote next week. LMUSLI is one of the highest ever. breaking the record for turn-outs in Business Manager recent years. Extra staff are being Stark LAInti..1) Five Exec sabbatical posts are up for grabs, with VP Education and employed at voting points to cope EVERYBODY WELCOME Campaigns attracting five nominees , with the expected demand, Pete Davis, current VP But not all students were even: NEWSDESK Communications, pressed home the enthusiastic. or even aware elections importance of voting. "Exec gets a were coming up. "What's Exec?" one Kung fu footballers 0532 lot of money to spend on the union: fresher asked. Another, third year it's a position of responsiblity with a Clare Banks. said: "I'm not going to Ballet dancers for a drink or tutu 434727 lot of power attached. vote unless I see something about the Advertising "It's hard work and if the wrong candidates and campaigns. It's a Rugby players with odd shaped balls person gets in they could get away farce just to vote for your best mates 0532 with doing nothing - this is the or the best looking candidates." students' opportunity to have a say in 314251 what goes on_" See pages /6 and 17 Leeds University graduate as licensee Davis hopes more than 1_500 for figrtlier election details NEWS LEEDS STLTDENT FridalKicruary lo 1993 3

STUDENT PUNCHED TO THE FLOOR DURING PHONE CALL TO HIS GIRLFRIEND Flats dubbed 'unsafe' SCENE OF THE ATTACK . Woodhouse flats and (bottom lent Matthew Stone, the victim of the assent, after resident Pic: Mark Churchill assaulte

HY NICOLA WOOLCOCK UNIVERSITY security has been condemned after a student was assaulted while on the phone to his girlfriend in his hall of residence. The assailant gained access to 1..M1.1's Woodhouse flats through C block's broken entrance door last Wednesday night. The attack has angered fellow residents who claim it could have been avoided if their complaints about the unsafe door had been acknowledged. Matthew Stone. a first year Economies and Public Policy student. was punched and mugged while using the phone on the second floor. His wallet. containing just £5, was stolen by the attacker who ran nut of the building immediately afterwards. Escaped made about the broken door prior to the bleeding five hours later He has now gone since we're paying £43 per week rem to live AliRough the police were already outside home to recover. Isere." dealing with another incident. the assailant assault He claimed: "The front door is permanently open, it can't he locked, and it's Patrick Ryan. the Residential Officer of However Peter Railion, 1.101.1's Head of escaped unnoticed. Stone was later admitted to been like that for a few months. I filed 'Woodhouse flats and also a Special Constable Business Services. defended the university - Leeds General Infirmary. complaints with the Residential Officer. at Millgarth police station, refused to comment "When checked after the incident, this door Stephen Hunt. president of Woodhouse Patrick Ryan. but nothing was done until after on the incident. WAS found to he sticking and was mended flats. said that several complaints had been the incident by which time it was a bit too Jamie Dunning. a first year flatmate of immediately late." Stone, spoke about the assault: "We were "Providing the university estates division is "The attack would newer have happened if it really shocked. Matthew was upstairs phoning advised. the university deals with maintenance wasn't for that door. Ifs disgusting, something his girlfriend when this local lad appeared problems speedily and effectively." should have been done sooner. The security from nowhere, punched him in the face and Millgarth police are appealing for witnesses round herr is pathetic, there arc no gates on the nicked his wallet. to contact them and have released a description car park. 'we've been burgled and it's not of the suspect surprising since residents let anyone into the Vulnerable They are looking for a white male, about 6 block. This assault could have potentially heen "The security is very pour and we feel feet tall, well built. between 19 and 21.years- a lot worse since anyone could have entered really vulnerable being on a main road We've old. At the time of the attack he was wearing the building," had problems with local kids before. People blue jeans, a black and grey jacket, a black ski Stone was taken to hospital with a walk into the flat willy-nilly. what with it hat and was unshaven suspected broken nose after the attack being left open. I think the situation is Although not broken. his nose was still appalling. we expect better than this especially See Opinion: page 6 Royal Free card trick visit Ark relaunch OFFICIALS from Leeds University have Dr Andrew Brooks. Senior Assistant THE Duchess of Kent will he 'ARK' is to return to Leeds University is being increased Marshall insists that admitted that free replacements are Registrar at the university, said that if the visiting Leeds University to after an absence of four months. The this is nor connected to the death: available for students who have their student can produce the number from the open a new Language centre death of a man at the last event, in "This is for completely different union cards stolen, wriles Paul police report of the crime, he or she can on February 21. writes Phil October last year, led to several Ark reasons.- Greenough. get a free replacement. Judge. and Phantasia nights being cancelled as The man. a 2I-year-old from York The news comes after a letter appeared Hall also accused the university of On her last visit the a mark of respect. arm ms Paul was arrested for his own safety during in last week's Leeds Student claiming that "purposefully" witholding this Duchess. who is Chancellor of Greenough. the event but later collapsed. the university was "ripping you off' by information front the student handbook. the university. was confronted The event will take place next He was taken to Leeds General charging £15 to replace cards that had arguing that they were deliberately by members of LUU's weekend, but Bill Marshall, Infirmary but staff were unable to been taken when they can be received free attempting to get more money out of Lesbian. Gay and Bisexual Entertainments Manager at LUU. said revive hint and he died soon after of charge. students. society. who demanded that that there will be no increase in the being admitted. Emmi Hall, a student at Leeds Brooks denies this: "Previously there the university should allow numbers of First Aid on the night Students were happy to see the University, said that when her card was has been no need to put this in the her to speak to them. At the rime of the death it was felt event return. Rob 'Thomas. a third year stolen she was told by the Fees Office that handbook because there were so few Tim Goodall, LUU Welfare that nothing more could have been at Leeds University. was at the Iasi Ark she would have to pay £15 to get another instances." Secretary, who met the done to stop the occurrence of night: "I was shocked when that bloke one. However she heard another student He added that the information will go Duchess on her last visit. said: incidents such as these. died that night, but I'm glad Ark is saying that it was possible to get one free. into the next edition of the handbook. "She is a very nice woman." However, while the level of security back." 4 LETDS STUDENT Friday February 10. isi95 NEWS Rags to riches for college Matches should be struck off AS colleges and universities nationwide "We have traditionally received a very low A FLAMING row is breaking out Paul Belzer, a student al Leeds a ; figure and now it is much higher as funding University, said: "By the time face severe financial difficulties. Park Lane among peeved students - they say their you're College has just announced a £1.3 million is managed centrally by the g.ovenunent matches can't even strike a light. halfway through the packet, it P budget surplus, writes Tamzin Lewh. who wish to converge the rate of -funding writes Matt Dolton. becomes impossible to light any more When the college became an for colleges," Matches supplied by the National matches - it's a disgrace." independent corporation in 1993. it had the The surplus is being put to good use: Union of Students have been labelled But John Leith, managing director second lowest level of income4.4 all the 450 additional staff have been taken on, there "useless" by students smokers. of the Cornish Match Company who colleges in England. Funding for Park Lane have been significant building alterations, And a series of experiments has supply the NUS, said: "The problem is What a planker has risen considerably over the last year the college is now leasing properties and demonstrated that the NUS brand is caused by damp which breaks down While that of other colleges has dropped there are plans to develop its information no competition for market rivals Swan the chemical composition of the CANADIAN Desmond Kelly John Taylor. College Principal. said: technology resourem. restas and England's Glory. striking side." has been sentenced to 15 months in jail for chasing the boyfriend of his 16-year•old daughter off the balcony of their home with a kitchen knife. David Blake was fcm:ed to leap naked from the first floor flat, a drop of 60 feet, which resulted in him breaking both legs. He appears to have won his case against Kelly on the grounds Ronson drugs bust that he was made to "Walk the plank like a pirate.- Putting your foot in it

A 23-YEAR-OLD Chicago woman found herself in hospital after attempting DIY cosmetic surgery. Claire Needham stuck both feet into a nets 15 garbage crusher. hoping that By SAN+ Ross & •otiv WAKMY this would reduce them to a sire enabling her to pursue a A DRUGS raid at Up Yer Ronson at the career in modelling. Pleasure Rooms resulted in 15 arrests last Friday night. Hold tight Two men in their mid twenties have subsequently been charged with possession of class A drugs with intent to AN UNCOMFORTABLE supply. Another 13 individuals have been charged with couple of hours was spent by holidaymakers retunung from possession of classes A and B drugs. Gran Canaria to Luton. Staff on Ecstasy, crack cocaine, hoard the Monarch Airlines cannabis and amphetamines MUSIC flight asked passengers if they were seized. could mind crossing their legs Promoters fur the night STOPPED AS for the duration of the journey have said that West Yorkshire as the settlers were out of Order Police ended up with "egg on In order to make the flight their face" after the incident, 90 POLICE easter. drinks were nee served. since so few clabbers were arrested. RAID CLUB Owl foul The music was stopped at 12.31Iam for half an hour as "They sealed off the exits. It around 90 police officers was really strange, the music IRISH pigeons were RENT-A-POST: Union leaders celebrate topping £500,000 Pic: Debashis Singh disappointed when a plastic searched 300 of the 1200 stopped and everyone just owl was removed from the roof clubhers present, before the stood around until the music of a block of dots In Dublin police left and the night started again." Far from being scared away by continued. The raid was part of the the intruder as intended. they It is understood that a Leeds present crackdown on drugs in had actually become rather student was among those the West Yorkshire area. "It arrested. was planned after officers had UNION STRIKES GOLD fond of it. and some birds had even tried to mate with IL to the Police made a series of observations dismay of residents. at the venue," said a THE ongoing tent strike took a new twist this when they get this letter." said Helen Russell. a A spokesman for Up Yrr spokesman for West Yorkshire week as university bosses attempted to stall the second year living in Tetley Hall. "It will make Ronson said that the raid did Police. union's growing campaign. writes Jamie them even more determined to fight for a greater No babe no pay Halhans reduction." not threaten the future of the Jeopardise club night: "We met yesterday Residents in Leeds University accommodation More than a thousand students have now AN ANGRY German woman deposited their rent into the union fund leading to with the police to sort the Leeds City Council has received letters front Carl Potter. Director of dumped her husband after he a total holding of over £6t111.000• An equivalent matter out. refused to comment on Residential and Commercial Services, hoping to was unable to fulfil a £46,11111)- "If they thought anything whether this incident will persuade them to pay rent bills to the university amount of rent has been paid to the university. a-year contract committing Inns was seriously wrong we would jeopardise their recent plans instead of LUU's rent strike holding fund. leaving 4.0011 students who have not paid their to spicing up her love life. She rent to either the union or the university. Support Crave been closed down. As it is, for Leeds to become a 24-hour Potter clarified the university's position and claimed that his failure to make we will be open as usual on claimed its proposed concession of a £60 rebate has been lower in Sentinel Towers and Oxley Hall her pregnant denied him the city. Friday." Up Yer Ronson moved to and lower rate of future increases was fan. The than in other residences. right to receive the money. The Sam Moon, a third year The Pleasure Rooms over the offer was rejected by at recent union Ordman But despite recent offers, Tim Goodall. LUU frustrated man took the dispute Portuguese and French student summer after leaving its General Meeting. Welfare Secretary. argued that "the university to court. suing for a year's at Leeds University, was at the previous home at The Music Most residents seemed unimpressed. "Students could defer its loan payments until the year 2000, 'wages.' Magistrates decided club when the police arrived: Factory-. are going to be fed-up with the Vice-Chancellor enabling further concessions to students•" that he had no case as the contract was invalid. Hooker suckers sinner A SPANISH priest paid Rhodes to success Thinking positive heavily for his indiscretions when he was arrested by police A MODEST professor has won a Millett remarked: "It's really great. TOP slots for banking boffins are In 1994, around thirty students in Madrid. He made the prestigious award, writes Louise Inghanr. We're all very proud of him. He being offered by Midland Bank in a applied for each place. Midland mistake of trying to pay a Professor David Rhodes received the definitely deserves it scheme of positive discrimination, believes that the key to success is prostitute with a forged 2,001) annual Faraday medal from the Institute writes Alison Wragg. matching people to places. peseta note. She was of Electrical Engineering for his lifetime Second year ethnic minority Equal Opportunities manager fur wulerstandably annoyed at this. contribution to science and technology. undergraduates can apply for a Midland. Andy Constantinides, said: but he refused to make amends, particularly in the field of microwave financial foothold through the "We are keen to attract ethnic leaving her instead at the side research 'Midland Fellowship.' minority graduates with the of the motorway where she was When asked to comment on his The jobs up for grabs invoke potential to reach senior able to alert police and send success. Professor Rhodes said: "Of working over the summer break: management." them in his direction. course I am very pleased but it's not for managerial roles could follow on Robin Johns, General Secretary me to say whether I deserve it." completion of graduate training for of LUU, responded: "Most The Leeds University lecturer will be those selected. discrimination is had. However. Compiled by presented with the award in a ceremony The scheme, established in 1991, Midland is pin-pointing the areas Sarah Dyson in London on March N. Fourth year has enticed many hopefuls each where it is necessary and using it in Electrical Engineering student Ben David Rhodes Pic. Ian Spencer year. Competition is tough. a positive way." NEWS LIED5 51111/•5.7 ITILIA 1.chruw, , 10 1795 11111111 Broken lighting sparks Oxley safety fears

FEARS tor the security of residents at Oxley Flats BI- Man tors Carl Potter, claimed the lighting will now he Ilse& have been further heightened after it was revealed It is our policy to deal with a problem as soon as on-site security lighting has been broken for weeks. away." said Steven Stewart a first year resident at we are aware of it." he said. The revelation conies one week after a serious the flats. "The broken lighting was reported three -We are doing all we can to ensure that nothing attack on a female student in the grounds, weeks ago but nothing has been done. Iike this happens again." In the wake of the incident, residents called tot We need better security, there are always people in Two years ago a prowler targeted female better lighting and more security patrols. the grounds who shouldn't be there and no one students at the hall. in the wake of those attacks But Leeds Student has learned that lighting seems to stop them." university bosses promised to improve security and posts which let students walk safely between Now some male students are so concerned about address the problem of poor lighnng. blocks of flats have been out of action since the the lack of security they have started escorting Adrian Slater, warden at the hall, refused to beginning of term female fnends along the unlit pathways. comment about site security when questioned by Carl Potter "Something should have been done straight Resident and Commercial Services Director. l.rrel+ Student Resident leaves after

Highlield House flats (main pic) and hall president, Simon Bailey (below lett), racism' slur Pics: Mark Churchill 11', 1' tin_ Gsissouuii & %/PAVAN RAY-ION715 ACCUSATIONS of racial harassment have led to Redder a student being moved out of his hall by university security. The student, a 22-year-old from Sri Lanka, was evicted after than ever a series of complaints was made by other residents of LMU's Highfic-ld House Flats to the university authorities. DUST off your red noses, The complaints included preparations have already branding female students started for this year's STUDENT "prostitutes" and dubbing others Comic Relief, writes Nicola "white scum." Wooleock. Other allegations included The big day will take LABELLED threatening behaviour and place on March 17 and its walking into other studeuts main student event will be bedrooms when they were asleep. the 4Konk-a Your High OTHERS The decision to move hint was Street Challenge' in which taken by a presidential meeting teams of contestants have to last week after residents wrote to `SCUM' navigate their way from the university complaining. one end of the road to the police are gonna get ye.' During a period of two other -without walking or "He was a risk. It was only a months, over five tesidents filed any other conventional matter of time before someone reports against him to LMU whacked him, the sort of things means! authonties. However, he himself Over /92 million has he was saying. He threatened to 11 a_ EVERYBODY made numerous reports against already been raised by kill someone in the halt" his neighbours, both to LMU and Simon Bailey. president of the Comic Relief and this year to the police. hall's JCR committee, said: "His the organisers hope to 'tv NEEDS behaviour has totally affected break the f 100 million Abused students' exam revision in the harrier. hall." Red Nose Day 1995 was One resident at Highfield 1." S ODY, launched on Tuesday giving House. Andy McCain. claims that Attacked everyone five weeks before he verbally abused both himself the big day to plan their and his girlfriend. and on one Bailey has attacked the TO occasion pushed hint up against money-raising event. university's policy on admissions. For information on how the wall and threatened to assault "The screening process needs to get a fundraising pack, him: "I've never been so scared in altering. If he's transferred to LOVE. my life. He needs proper and other details, call another hall then there will he professional help." Emma Calverley on 081 576 problems." On the Friday before his 4475. There have been reports that 1OMEB departure. the Sri Lankan was hit the student, who is studying for ✓a by a snowball thrown by another an HND and A levels, has been FaeGMAYl resident. He called the police and placed into another LMU hall of Lucky for some claimed he was the victim of residence. racial harassment. A hall insider lan Robertson. LMU's Head WIY4777/1/tYOM A RECENT survey has said: "He was standing outside of Discipline, was unavailable for reseeded which restaurants people's doors singing 'The comment. FRIZZANTESE ,SEMI SPARKLING WINE £3.00 A BOTTLE students in heeds rate highest for (hose moments of ROSES FOR THE LADIES pas•donate prandial desire. The poll, commissioned by Leeds Student, discovered that Action's award Lucky's Takeaway on Raglan Road was the favourite for COMMUNITY action workers Leeds C ommunity Action Is banishing late night hunger. in Leeds have just won a made up of students from both Close behind Lucky's was prestigious award for their universities and the colleges in Big Mama's followed by Fizzy services to the Leeds community, Leeds. Joe's. writes Paul Greenough. The project was the first in the Top on the list of midnight Members of Leeds country when it was set up in JAKES DINER tucker were the ("hers Community Action were 1993 and has so far helped many Special and seafood pizzas. presented with The Comunity young people in the Chapeltown TEL 746075 Flu from Lucky's said Enterprise Award by Prince and Meanwood areas move into that the restaurant had Charles at a ceremony this week permanent accommodation. quickly become busy after it at the Granada Studios in The Enterprise Award is opened last term. Manchester. sponsored by The Tinter and "It's mad. especially at the The prize was given for the accountants Touche Roes. HYDE PARK CORNER WOODHOUSE LANE LEEDS 6 weekends - we're rushed of group's LATCH project- a Robert Abercrombie. "The co- our feet at the moment. but scheme which aims to help ordinator of the scheme, said he we always welcome nmre homeless people in Leeds was pleased to win the prize: The customer," renovate property to create idea is to help the homeless to homes for themselves. help themselves." t bills SI11111E14T Friduy February 10 t5'$ COMMENT Si ANALYSIS

on the system then publish whet they %suit on the "net and TOM Whitwell hit the headlines this freedom of speech the 'net - dubbed the people in this country will be able to week. The fourth year student was enshrined In the read it. Yet we won't be able to communicating with others on the famous First gateway to the twenty respond to anything that infringes our Internet when he landed himself in a Amendment to the first century - will be laws. spot of bother. A careless comment constitution. the 'net SiroblirTIT subject to the same This will mean that communication about a Government minister left him still poses a few draconian censorship from Britain will be tempered by the facing libel laws. Whitwell wesn't problems, laws as the rest of the threat of prosecution and that the rest making accusations but writing in As the 'net is a OPINION British media. of the world will have the edge. The response to them. However, his gaffe global medium, laws In a week that has media is the fourth estate of this highlights the danger of the internee which govern it are viewers to watch, then so be it_ seen the ridiculous country, acting as the public watchdog. the information superhighway. hound to he hard to enforce. It is the Whttwell's case has shown that the scenario where details of Rosemary The law surrounding the 'net is same predicament as the broadcasting 'net is not the fun and games that it was West's trial cannot he covered by this detatched front government and the vague. There have been no of the satellite porn channel Red Hot meant to he. Information superhighway country's media but can be reported judiciary prosecutions under English law for Dutch. Although classified as olo:env maybe. but for some it could also abroad. we see an example of what However. If foreign journalists are anything published on the system in this country. the station passes the become the Court Case Express. could happen if the 'net is shackled by allowed to comment on things that we However. a test case in America criteria of the Dutch censors and. If the Once a precedent is established fur legal constraints. are not. then it makes British showed that even in the country with satellite's footprints alloa British prosecution over information appearing The rest of the world will he able to democracy a laughing stock. Bernard eeese, Dear Editor, Jenkins outside looking in -Wipe the Slate clean- LEE•VE IT OUT I AM flabbergasted by the ill-considered WE WERE incensed te, exactly the reaction our sighing. Now, look at the other side of the attack and as and uninformed stance taken by Rosa have this marvellous read your front page warden turned to avoid. female students we are of the coin - I come hack to your Prince. a self-appointed high flying fascination about toilets. It is 'report' in the last issue of You have caused house after a curry. "Can I use your concerned. We also feet journalist who, alas, insists on not that I am sick or perverse Leeds Student concerning alarm amongst students toilet. please. I need a pots." You great sympathy for the humiliating herself on a weekly basis by (although many people tell me the assault on a student at and got your fuels wrong victim and are aneioue for that I am so) but I find would show me the way. However. pontificating on things about which she Oxley Hall and flats all because you faded to her safety and the safety knows nothing. Ilavatories so remarkable in every if we had come back from a run and More than anything, wait for the victims' asked you if E could remove my of fellow residents. Yet I refer, or course. to her disrespectful way. we are angered by the statement. We would like sock and pick my feet, you would we cannot believe how and thoughtless attack on Simon Mackay The toilet, the too. the bog, the gross misrepresentation to point out that the tell me to get lost. I can see a quick people are to blow who is, I assure her, an extremely can, the little boys / girls' room, the of students in the flats. 'black spot' was incorrect contradiction in your views. the situation out of intelligent and moralistic individual. pisser. the clapper. the shifter. We would like to make it as the student was proportion and produce I. You can tell the type of person Simon left school at became a Watering the flowers, draining the clear that, contrary to attacked in a very open you live with from the things they an inaccurate report. lawyer's clerk. and spent a good five vein, pointing Percy at the porcelain. are space at the opposite end do behind the closed bathroom door. your report. we Unlike Leeds Student years immersed in the arena of law seeing a dog about a hone, doing neither angry at Adrian of the site. Also we feel we would like to stress numbers. having a dump. doing a The Murphy's Drop. whose most before deciding to pursue it as a career. Slitter nor feel that he is that if only one other that this is the opinion of He therefore hats more experience and Douglas diurd). laying a lug. These notorious feature is the stain it in any way incompetent attack had occurred there one flat and therefore knowledge than many recently are a few of my favourite names. 1 leaves in the bowl even after as a warden We feel that in the last two years it avoid making incorrect established young lawyers. Moreover, he could go on... flushing, would point its finger at he was faced with an hardly warrants the title sweeping generalisations has not approached this controversial WI) dinixople find it so difficult the alcoholic who loves their pint of unusual and difficult of 'black spot': such about student opinion. It a' express themselves when it comes moue The Niagara Shit, which falls case with the blurred vision of a vitriolic inaccuracies could he makes us wonder how e, defecating? They need to use with such force that it leaves a situation and handled it in warrior. but with the insight of a man ,lifferent euphemisms to articulate rainbow amongst the spray. would the best way possible. As avoided by waiting for many times we as a well educated in the complexities of the their bowel movements I have no indicate a sports person with a Adrian Slater said, he was the full truth, as Adrian student population have British justice system. problem with this and will glad penchant for water activities. The awaiting the facts before Slater did, before jumping been misrepresented by Simon understands the tragedy of the stand on the Parkinson steps, reach Noxious Fume Dump means that he alerted the students to to conclusions. your 'newspaper ' death of Karen Reilly all too well. He up to the sky with open arms and you live with a sadist who is the avoid mass hysteria. However, we would does not aim to eradicate the case from type of person who will not tell However, your report like to stress that we do the law archives, nor does he wish to exclaim joyfully at the top of my Flat E32, Oxley Flats. voice: anyone of his efforts and linger seems to have caused realise the serious nature eliminate the concept of 'guilt' from the I LOVE MY SIITTTER' innocently outside the toilet. waiting unfortunate occurrence in 1991. No: that and 1 hope to God that nobody for casualties to emerge. Finally if THE article concerning the assault at I THOUGHT I should write to express my would be contrary to the law indeed, and takes it out of the context of toilets you hear explosions from within, it Oxley Hall in last week's edition was concern at the inaccurate repealing of the would legitimise almost any crime or in the wrong fashion_ is probably me and my misleading, biased, insubstantial and incident at Oxley. The university is acutely provided a guilty' party was not I have spent a great number of OHMYGODmyheadis- uninformed. By way of just some aware of the growing problems of crime in immediately implicated. What Simon hours on the throne of our house gonnaexplocle shit, I turn strange examples, the police were involved right the city but obviously' there are limits to hopes for is justice in its purest sense. doing the door, sitting pensively or colours. my eyes bulge. and just from the start, but said that there was what can he achieved. and he does not feel that the bent double, grunting and groaning. before the moment of release, steam little they or others could do until a In this case additional security patrols imprisonment of a soldier who was or singing, or screaming. I have shoots from my ears. Perhaps it is description of the suspect had been have been posted and the police are keeping under strict orders to prevent the built a kind of rapport with my too little brown and too much white received - information not available until a close eye on the site. Students have been possibility of a terrorist attack is in any toilet. [ respect it and it respects me. bread, perhaps the fast food -I don't Wednesday morning. warned of the need to he vigilant. way just. I talk to it. clean it, sing it songs, know. Warning nouces based upon the facts Adrian Slater, the Warden of Oxley To compare the task of an 'average read it stones, stroke it and kiss it. mailable at the time were posted around Flats criticised in this article, is very Bobby' with that of a British soldier In return it loves me - it always urthermore, I know that the flats within hours of the incident capable and able. He works tirelessly at protecting against years of incomparable flushes, never splashes at me, and you too share a house with taking place. You may also like to note what are. at times. very difficult duties and terrorist activity is wholly absurd. not once in the last few months has people like this. You enjoy that the paper couldn't even photograph has all the students' interests at heart. I Private Lee Clegg, doing what he it refused to swallow what I have your time on the toilet , the right area - the path shown on the understand he has visited most flats on the believed (and was led, by higher fed It. Every one of us spends a front cover is not "next" to the hall and is site to offer further advice and reassurance authorities, to believe) to be the 'right Some of you may raise an Fcouple of hours every week nowhere near the place of the incident, thing' in the face of potential political In short, he is very committed and has my eyebrow or two and reach for the answering the call of nature, This the student who was assaulted has full support. and social disaster, was merely fulfiling phone to nng the men in white equates to tour and a half days a since told me that she is "disgusted" by I very much hope that this was an the requirements of a heavily demanding emits. but that proves my point year (including a couple of extra Leeds Student's response • and that is an isolated incident but can assure you we will and exhausting mission. That. in the exactly. hours for the Christmas week) accurate quote' keep a close eye on the situation. event, he was mistaken in his during which time you must find ("J Potter, identification of an unmarked car You have no true comprehension some degree of pleasure. Some of us Adrian Slater Director of Residential speeding through an Irish cross-over of the physical. spiritual and tend to spend a little longer, and I Warden of Oxley Flats and Commercial Services. point (at which all civilian cars always ideological concept of 'the toilet.. lr fall into that category. as I tend to stop) cannot be blamed on him Editor's reply: The facts of the case veer clearly stated 1 A senous attack took place. 2 disgusts you. It revolts you. draw inspiration from the inside of personally If there is a 'guilt party'. it is Adrian Slater didn't report the wreck tor five days. 3 Therefore students wet kept in the dark the bathroom door, I the entire system. which clearly needs do work. I llus coreetentes a mistake and the appropriate gesture would he is, admit it Picture this 1 have a telephone in read. I write letters, I revise. I sing, overhauling, This is the reform for which my bathroom_ I speak to people and !once even wrote a play. I spent Simon Mackay is striving. while on the toilet. Not. if you were a good couple of hours on the throne Dear Rosa Prince. When an the one 1 was talking to and you last night. Where else do you think I Resist the thought police individual decides to becomes a soldier, heard me wheezing - which I don't wrote this article"! he carries the weight of entire nation on often do - accompanied by faring. When the day is done and my I WOULD like to express my agreement with matter how distasteful we find their views. I his guardianship. His duty is. indeed. to plopping, splashing noises, then nine time comes and my ticker stops the !cues of Annabel Kennedy and Rebecca urge everyone to think very carefully before protect the populace This he did. as far going along with these 'politically correct' times out of ten. you would hang tip ticking. I want to follow the King. Ryan in last week's Leeds Student. If the as he knew. and people like your bigoted on me. However, if 1 were in my He died on his throne. And when demands for this Christian Group to be thought polee. self should feel somewhat humbled by room speaking to you on the blower they found Elvis Presley. pants banned are met, where will it slop? The Ise What more. the fact that such men put themselves on and I was picking my athlete's foot around his ankles, all that was left Socialist Workers Party - which favours the line without sufficient protection in The Editor r hypothetically speaking, as my foot were his regal turds floating in the violent revolution? The Green Party? Who is the name of true freedom and hygiene is perfect) you would still bowl, that some of us just might call to draw the line between the acceptable and Leeds Student justice_something about which you are speak to me. despite the fact that life . the unacceptable? lints University Union evidently ignorant. you may hear me scratching and and somebody flushed. The only way in a democracy that our free PO Box IP speech can be protected is to give it to all. no Leeds. 1-S1 1UH Yours with regard for democracy.

COMPAIENI lit ANALYSIS LELIA STUDENT Frill,. Tem, Ir. Ili 149 , galshOuldn'tkith banning ilea) from o ablZ AMELI HILL explains why it Pour ral dut to often.

,iii got tough with a face. you have to accept that they scunobag student who had need another outlet for their S_ the audacity to put misty venom. This Peter. is how gossip 10'4 gossip about you on the is born. computer interne'. With a bit of If they're going to gossip - and pressure from your office, you they arc - why not learn to love got your apology, the gossip has it'? After all, if nobody's talking been withdrawn and all is well. about you, you're obviously not Bin. as the cliche goes. what's doing anything remotely wrong with a piece of harmless interesting with your life. Conic gossip'? Gossip is a positive on Pete: as a politician, you must influence, re-affirming our place realise that it's better to he in society. notorious than anonymous. I Personally I'm a world know that if I hadn't heard those champion gossip. It constantly rumours. you'd still he as big a OvalPit gets me into trouble. I tell the nobody in my consciousness as wrong people the wrong say - yawn - John Redwood. information. and I'm also invariably caught in the act. The his learning to love your DEA ,VEAL'S words: "Don't tell anyone" are gossip business is true fatal to me. For a while, when Twhether the rumour is I'm alone, I truly believe that I accurate or not. Because if the will keep this juicy fact to myself, price of gossiping is to be but I never do. gossiped about, then the price 01 So I can fully understand the passing on wildly inaccurate EAL is a misunderstood plight of poor old Tom Whitwell rumours is to have them told meat: it is an i the student who blabbed about about you. Peter, I understand Vunfortunate twist of Veal calvesV have been treated C in BecausecTE we do farm our own veal, you on the internet). Sitting there that those horrid rumours about sulinary fate that we have decided the inhumane ways for centuries - ever since although this is a fact that seems to have with a blank computer screen. you may be untrue. Because. you delicacy of veal can only be fully the biblical fatted calf was led to the been overlooked, as the industry so small - and all that juicy gos. why, he see, I too have been the victim of appreciated when the poor creatures have chopping block to celebrate the return of there are only about 20 farms in Britain. just had to open his gob_ it would scumlous gossip. been reared in conditions of great cruelty. In order to ensure that the calves suffer the prodigal son But at least in those days The veal we produce doesn't have the have been inhuman not to. Only today, as a friend of from the anaemia that it traditionally there was nothing hypocritical about it: colourless pallor of the Continental veal Gossiping has bought me mine stubbed his cigarette out farmers mistreated their animals and were but is delicately pink: a sign that the calves into my car ash-tray. he said.. considered to make their flesh so tasty, untold thrills and delights. Let's proud to exhibit the results. have been given a balanced diet and have "isn't this the ash-tray your they are prematurely weaned and kept. for face it. apart from the odd The 'victory' that animal rights had sonic freedom of movement This companionship based on a shared boyfriend since came into?" Now. the duration of their short lives. in campaigners were so proud of having won colour is what Floyd claims gives our veal passion for fly-fishing or sonic however much I plead my windowless warehouses. in crates over British veal farmers in 1940 is now a superior taste. other worthy pursuit. most innocence on this one - and I can deliberately designed to prevent any nationally recognised to he a mockery or As worthy as the efforts of these British friendships are and assure you all that the only things movement that might lead to muscle development_ professed government moodily: we no tanners are, however, they suffer from a sustained on a healthy diet of that get near my ash-tray are The veal controversy is now lading longer keep calves inhumane conditions public who are still religiously chanting gossip and rumour. Perhaps that's cigarette butts and the odd from the news. although the death of Jill in England. Instead we ship more than a the lesson taught to them on their mother's why you're so tetchy Pete - you Cadbury's Creme Egg wrapper - Phipps briefly brought the demonstrations half a million calves out to the Continent knee: veal meat is unhappy meat. need a good natter; to get out it's too late. The rumour's out back into the headlines But the problem each year, where they can be legally kept This is not necessarily true: instead of more there. and my reputation is sullied could be solved so simply. just a little in conditions so desperate that it is banning veal from our plates. we should be But you're probably of the forever. imagination on behalf of British marketing difficult to keep the animals alive for the buying British veal and eating If) times as annoying anti-gossip brigade who But, while, like yourself. I and a shift in public attitude could improve five months before they arc slaughtered. much as we do now. It's simple economics whine: "I don't care what people may have momentarily felt like veal's street teed to the point where animal Once the calves have been killed. we buy that the more British veal we buy, the say about me. as long as they say bringing the wrath of the British rights campaigners dined out on the stuff almost one third of our original export cheaper prices will become and the it to my face." Bollocks. If establishment down on the heads and it was politically incorrect not to eat it. hack again. Farmers who now sell their calves into everyone went storming up to of my slanderers; not being a For a cow to produce milk, she has to My point is not the clear and expensive misery abroad will rear them in each other the moment they got it cabinet minister just yet, the give birth to a calf. The calf, however, hypocrisy and double-dealing apparent in comparable comfort in England. Veal meat hit narked. the world would be a injunctions had to he put on hold cannot be allowed to remain with the this arrangement: we all know the moral will become happy meat and more than very confrontational place: "Yes for a while- And I don't let it mother. otherwise it will drink the milk degeneracy inherent in politicians of any that, it will become a new focus of Brian, you are going a hit bald. bother me that people choose to intended for our cornflakes. kind, but that it is all so unnecessary. Nationalism a sign that you are and you haven't done the washing fantasise about my boyfriend and The mother is genetically bred for milk The slab of anaemic flesh that is bought supporting your country. Like driving a up for a week you bastard." - Not ash-trays producing. Her calves. therefore, will as an occasional politically incorrect treat British car. only inure prestigious. You see Pete, the majority of nice. never he meaty enough to be reared as stands accused of being tasteless. Chefs Many major supermarkets are now I could do without all that gossip victims just have to lump refusing to stock Continental veal and potential beefburgers, so the only way like Keith Floyd have refused to use myself, and I freely invite people it. They fret, they fume. they tear these calves can financially justify their Continental veal for years - and not for any Tesco proudly leads the field by selling to bitch about me behind my their hair for half an hour. then existence is to be killed so early that their particularly moral reason. but simply British veal. the next time you plan a . And if you don't want they go off and have a good old hack meat has a completely different taste and because he strongly believes British veal romantic dinner for two, don't slam in the people to call you names to your bitch about someone else. can he classified as a delicacy. As veal. tastes so much better. Iamb: vamp it up with veal!

THE. new Dark Ages have arrived. Don't they could get him first. In between was when Robin they swore, and when someone tried to allow this month's elections - supposedly a black farce making a pretty good case Johns break them up they turned round and a sign of civilisation to fool you for the return of austere Victorian confessed the screamed "WE'RE NOT ARGUING!" otherwise. Peer a little more closely institutions which incarcerate the that two After this telling display of politics in behind the veneer of democracy and mentally ill-at-ease people had action. future meetings are to assiwgnitha you'll find our once immutable Malach has the unfortunate habit of withdrawn chairperson, a minute-taker and an institutions hurtling toward anarchy and starting sentences with the words "I've their cheques ACK official sword-carrier chaos. got a storming idea -" only to be shouted from the complementary daggers_ The perpetrators of this war of all down by everyone else. His latest was union's rent A weekly sketch of student po itics Perhaps like the cave MCA who rubbed against all are a hand of wild, untamed that the Irish Question has nothing to do strike fund sticks together for fire rather than simply savages hell-bent on mayhem and with students unions, a point which her natural response was: "Don't say that Malach feud goes back even longer than using them to wallop each other over the destruction. They can often be heard might actually make a little sense to most with Leeds Student listening!" (This that - one suspects they share a dartboard head, David Codrington and Tim howling wolfishly, hearing their teeth students but which in union circles is paper will of course refrain from leaking with Johns' face on one side. Mnlach's Goodall stared at their war-like brethren and threatening to tear each other limb almost as heretical as suggesting such precious information, particularly on the other - and reached new heights of in silent wonder. morbidly fascinated by from limb. They reveal to us the dark. executives are paid to do hard work. after receiving an icy stare from the agitation this week. the prospect that the Neanderthal savage irrational impulses in all our souls. They Match's query provoked general uproar mighty Johns himself.) Now, who could doubt that 2 hit of to lurks in us all. Soon Codrington was are members of LUU Exec. and outrage, including a series of squeaks This man is responsible for talking and fro. nip and tuck. even emotive desperately trying to keep a straight face, This man is responsible for and shrieks from Administration about many things in general but doing arguing is the stuff of which productive the most expressive gesture he had made overseeing all union societies: "Why the Secretary Ellie Clement. nothing in particular: "Who is delegate debate is made, Even Socrates was all meeting until asking whether it would fuck shouldn't I speak? YOU'RE ALL This woman is responsible for leader at the NUS Conference'?" he known to have raised a Grecian hanky to be quite proper for the union to fight HYPOCRITES"!" Richard organising union meetings and elections: asked, earning the admonishing answer: mop his perspiring brow. But the way fascism, "I'm worried what people might Malach began this week's Exec "Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" "Not even the delegates have been these two were going at it. we can only think of us," he said anxiously. meeting in a state of relative Clement's subtle skills of oration have elected yet!" Robin Johns is keen that the suppose the union constitution says prompting the put-down from Goodall: calm. He ended it outmanoeuvred many an opponent. disparate elements of Exec should put policy is determined by those with the "People might think we're not fascists!" bawling. swearing anti working on the ancient debating principle had blood behind them and unite. but his fewest black eves. How Labour MP Jack Goodall's gag was right, it for the wrong screaming like a man that arguments are won by bellowing as attempts at the peace process so far Straw. President of LUU in the golden reason: when you look at old footage of possessed. thirsty for loudly and annoyingly as one possibly would persuade anyone of Malach's sixties. would have pursed his lips in fascists you sec rigid order and military the blood of his can She is also concerned to promote belief that students should leave the disapproval at such bedlam in the grand discipline, and even that seems preferable colleagues unless open government and accountability, so Emerald Isle well alone. The Johns- old building: they yelled, they hollered. to being ruled by escapees from the zoo.

This week sees the release of Belly's new album. We bought it, gave it to IAN DARBN and told him to review it. op He rather enjoyed it...

is for Guitar. Surely the single most G important image at popular music. the geetar is the hippest fashion accessory of them all, uniformly cool, but oh su versatile. Folkies hide behind queen of them, bluesrnen cut their fingers on their steel strings, punks mash amps with them and spandex-clad metal heads toss off masturbatory licks from their double- headed art's. A guitar is perfect for any occasion, whether it be strumming three chord elegies at 3am in some bohemian student party or bounding across stage, doing Townsend leaps and then setting the damn thing on fire. As indicative of teenage rebellion as 5015 and pony tails. crap as synths. Belly (4AD) earts but still, they're not as city are more versatile titan most gadgetry and studio effects, and for the most cheesy in its expression of the pain of is for Happy Mondays. Five years part this is a successful development. betrayal. since Madchester, time for a bands - particularly those of the H loud American kind. Sometimes The album starts well with the sordid On King, Belly actually sound like a reassessment? Funky drumming, a rendition of adolescent sex that is "Puberty". band. Donelly is still at the forefront, but few choice pilfered riffs and some half- they sound cute, like The Lemonheads on Its A Shame The tune is sharp and the lyric amusing, their 'back to basics' approach means that baked lyrics whined by an ugly bastard telling of lovers covered in honey' and they sound more powerful and invigorating. with bad posture - in many ways the About Ray, but often their songs 'showered in beer'. The excellent They are a damn sight better than most Mondays were the true inheritors of the Bare infused with a remarkable degree of vitriol. This variation is due to Tanya "Seal My Fate" follows: it starts indie bands, and on the evidence of King throne vacated by the Stones sometime off a hit slowly but soon kicks Donelly's fine pop sensibilities and are capable of giving young bucks like in the mid '70s: that of Most Danceable into gear and is proof that Belly Sleeper a gond run for their money. Nobody Rock Band. Sex? Check. Drugs? Check. disturbing lyrics, which twist around the dark zones of life focusing upon matters of are prepared to be more raucous in pop music blends frightening neurosis Nasty choons? Check. The one other and wanton than previously. with happy pop tunes as well as Tanya would cite is Wham! l'sIo obsession and rejection. On the first album, influence I The next track "Red" is lovely. Donelly does, and with a few potential hit surface similarities, perhaps, but both star, apparently upbeat songs like "Feed the Tree" and "Slow Dog" dealt with powerful Donelly's voice oozes like golden singles on King, Belly could soon spring from the same grassroots source. syrup, or any other sticky fluid be even bigger contenders. Both played hedonistic, opportunistic subjects such as death and violence toward women. you'd care to mention, and Belly A definite Bjork. dole-queue pop, as far removed from the fashion a fine sing-along tune inverted snobbish proleries of The Fall Star itself was an album that shone in parts. At times, though, it was too slight, with the rhythm section as from the middle-class posings of pounding away like the sordid many of their Indic contemporaries. containing too many fillers and not enough substance. Krug is that difficult second characters Donelly sings about. And, of course, both were perfect At times King meanders along ,?xamples of Bands with Blatantly album; providing the chance for improvement on a promising beginning but like Star had done previously. Useless Members, Bez clearly tAing his "Silverfish" is the weakest song cue from Andrew Ridgley_ You're also inviting potential disaster if deemed twisting my melon. man! below par. Happily for Belly, King is an on the album, but isn't really improvement on Star. The band opt for a that bad. It's just not as rawer sound and employ a minimum of tuneful and catchy as most I of the other tracks, the best of which are the single "Now They'll Sleep", powerful near-perfect pop, L and "Untitled and Unsung", which contains a sultry lyric slung over a building and chunky rhythm, The album ends with "Judas My Heart" which bears a bizarre resemblance to "A Little Time" by The Beautiful South. Don't worry though, it's nowhere near as

Sultans of Ping NEW TADS CD The Duchess l) Love It All (Play It Again Sam) The Sultans of Ping are a Manchester's Nvi, I ads are more anti- surely the ultimate one joke band. everything than anti-fashion. Even singer Andy Spearpoira Singer Niall gets his kicks from confesses to being "deliberately bkxidy-minded" when 1:111.113 11.? abusing the audience but unlike, say, referring to his band's perverse fusion of dance grooves, Liam from Oasis or Richard from skewed guitars and politics. With two previous records Verve, it doesn't make him big nor leaning on the wrong side of avant-garde, it was time for clever. Whilst he acts like a hyperactive that difficult third album_ three-year-old on speed, the rest of the Thankfully, their latest release, the aptly-titled Love It All, band are so anonymous (or revels in a new-found accessibility. Cone are the garbled embarrassed) that they might as well Fall-style ramblings replaced instead by more furtive be invisible. The Sultans have also dalliances with the pop song. The man to blame for this ditched the indie disco fodder that refreshing outlook is leremy Mom, he who shaped the mixing on Massive Attack'i legendary Blue Lines, Now the nn Iron. once made them vaguely amusing. ISM trans ,te, from Mr, tram instead of playing "Stupid Kid" or guitars which suffocated 1992s Body Exit Mind are eclipsed • Amsterdam f$4 Delhi £339 •Madrid f 117 • Nice £106 "Where's me Jumper" they 'treated' us by an emphasis on the rhythm, while Spearpoint's vocal Bangkok 1379 • Frankfurt 1106 Mesico 1286 • Paris 1E34 to most of their forthcoming Li?. Well, has developed a richness akin to that of Julian Cope. • Brussels 172 •Geneva 1108 • Milan £144 • Rome 1141 cheers, but at least their early songs The songs, as well, complement this with their more Cairo f23S • Hamburg £108 • Munich £108 Singapore £432 had a sense of melody and fun, subtle approach; "Why Waste Your Love" sounds as The Caracas £399 Los Angeles £239 New York. £169 Toronto 1225 whereas the new ones simply equal no Stone Roses should do now had they been more - ia.n..i.,!,iiii, ii,p.ei .1r1,. Res!rmt.unt (hay aPO,V tunes plus lots of shouting. One or two adventurous, "Monday It Is" nicks the tune from Cat Stevens'Mathew And Son" and sticks it over a pseudo toncionDellii.siefece-itsthrnandullnialuARorwa ItontTaiptii-Ssoukos Angeies. suntan. rem 'forst orvion from Hill songs, such as "Michiko" and "You Falk Too Much," rose above the dirge baggy beat. Whereas "Saxophone" - 'a love song to Bill but since any sense of enjoyment was Clinton' - is a melancholic diatribe levelled at the ironies of Al STA TRAVEL ire•'ilr 411 W0.4.n.1,1 tnivellers. .1... Whrtrwr you're bull ni.l. were kILYU nal lIJ marred by the sight of the lead singer everyone's favourite dope smoking Premier. haw been. We No longer esoteric, judging by the hard industrial stomp utter the best cle•tia or, fah-. with FLEXIORITY h., dungy your mind as Yoga PI - slier all and the morons in the mash pit you are probably better off sticking to the of 'PSV" or the sombre acoustic lament that is "Souvenir'', we operate Mins over 100 OFFICES WORLDWIDE And we have .preset desk ter student* records anyway. Whilst the set went the New Fads have made the record they always knew down well the lads down the they were capable of. Whether it'll whisk them away into front in their Carter and Ned's T-shirts the heady world of pop excff.s. remains to be seen, but for 88 Vicar Lane, Leeds LS1 7JH the rest of us went away with feelings now it will do very nicely. of ambivalence towards the music and hatred towards the lead singer. 4111.• Tlutgrn tapir sop •OOK sir e04- 0,4 o4• ‘• 06 NEW YORK, LOS ANGELES, TOKYO, BANGKOK, SYDNEY, AUCKLAND STA TRAVEL Owen Gibson Piers Martin Music 8/9

Techno? House?

all Rock n "Roll to STEVE RANGER as he By Ben East dips into SINGLE OF THE WEEK Lftld'sebufiteAibum. SUPERGRASS- Manslze Rooster 5114d (Parlophone) On one, Definitely the most exciting, ovissorted. action packed and fun filled three minutes of the year so far. Tipped for world domination in 1995, issraly4 Supergrass may be Madness re-incarnate on "Manzize Rooster" but they do enough to be individual and original. just the thing to leave you with a smile on your face and your neighbours extremely annoyed. Wonderful.

P J HARVEY - Down by the Water (Island) Stripped down and less harsh than the usual l' J Harvey Leftism tare, "Down by the Water" runs Portishead and Massive (Hardhands/Sony) Attack close in the late night soundtrack competition. Whilst perhaps not quite as immediate as Supergrass, this atmospheric and unnerving single is Polly at her best. eftfield have been touted as the iniec-ted 'Melt', which has a glassy contribution shows a surer hand at the saviours of dance music, bringing surface which belies the slow building controls, especially as it leads into a ANNIE LBVNOX - No More '1 love pule (RAG) humanity back to the form that beat that threatens to expose the Sabres .ique dark and dangerous stomp. L Annie 1 aspire Fetish" Lennox is probably filed along with revels in its clinical absence of feeling. dancefloor monster lurking within. Lydon's 'Open Up' is, of course, j Harvey in the "quirky women in pop" cabinet. There's all But Leftism contains more than just Leftfield are never scared to try out where it all began, and remains a sorts of funny goings on in this single, but as you already nostalgia fur the good old days of something a hit off the wall, and one of seminal fusion of punk a • on with know, it oozes class and is another fascinating Lenno , meaningful pop. It is a state of the art the most effective of the hybrids involves the industrial power of techno to create a offering. Su Simon Mayo can breathe a huge sigh of manifesto, pointing dance towards the Toni Halliday contributing a noirish grandiose stomper which verges, as relict and kick Blur off the playlist some proper music 21st century, a showcase reflecting the vocal over the top of the reggae inflected now that everything Lydon does, on the edge of has returned. ability of dance to pounce on other 'Original. But the stand out track is parody. forms and pound them into weird new undoubtedly 'Space Shanty', a psychotic, Leftism is a triumph of rippling speed monster that sweeps you experimentation, but because THE GO-GO'S - The win* world lost Its head (BMS) hybrids. of this hits "The Co-Go'i-.1 Now where have I heard of them before?" I Admittedly, not every attempt is through a brutally compelling techno problems of gyre; too intricate to dance hear you ask. Mentioning lane Wiedlin and Belinda Carlisle successful; the album opens with some soundscape littered with huge slabs of to, it is also far to paranoia inducing to in the same sentence normally creates images of balding old doped-up ethno-techno, with Earl dark, ominous dub, and dumps you use as chill-out. The Leftfield experience men humming along to their tuneful dimes in traffic jams, Sixteen spouting some hippy panting and tearful on the other side. is hard to define, vet one that But wait! Now they sound like Belly and sing "Punk Rock sententiousness about peace that is lust because Leftfield have been undoubtedly demands attention and isn't dead." Most surprisingly good single of the week, and pretty hard to stomach, Similarly, 'Afro- charged with returning soul to dance. it much respect, and will certainly secure' the SOs revival continues Leff doesn't really work as a fusion, but doesn't mean they shy away from. its place in the evolution of dance music improves vastly when the portraying their brooding heart of in a weirder, sometimes scarier direction. LOVE HAPPY - Message of Love (MCA) experimentation gives way to a chunky darkness. As the album progresses, If imitation is the highest form of flattery, then M People tedmo brat. Barnes and Daley become more and Brand New Heavies must be blushing with pride upon But Barnes and Daley are back on confident with the the more f/Pie 004 Pi hearing this. However much Love Happy try though, this is • • safer ground with the spacey, trip experimental aspects; Danny Red's nothing more than the standard Ritzy's music which is playing when the dance floor is empty. A stunningly inept effort. The Aphex Twin Various THAT UNCERTAIN FEELING - Brother (Dead Dead Good) Classics (RA S) Classic Funk Vol 3 Picture the scene: a pleasurable enough indie-type Jangle (Mastercuts) bursts into life. "Aha, what's this!" I cry "Perhaps I have 0 discovered the best new band of 1995." Unfortunately, That CD e people at Mastercuts have been putting together superb years ago Richard James was arguably and Uncertain Feeling then go and ruin it by singing. Very deservedly the man of the moment - making olompilations for a few years now, along the lines of Rare Groove, T Ti badly. music from the most precarious electronic Electro, Jazz-Funk and of course, Funk This little number is no exception, arrangements and bits of scrap metal that sounded being packed with little gems just itching to get out of the sleeve and punch your button. ORANGE OEM( - Love 45 (Dead Dead Good) like no-one else on earth. Politely speaking, some of As blatant copying of your contemporaries' or your parents There are some old laves here, such as The Fatback Band, whose the things he's done lately have had rather esoteric music seems to be all the rage these days, I feel sure you will "Gum' to see my baby" sounds just a teensy bit like "Wicicy-wacky" and appeal. As for the fast stuff - squiggly-leep-thwack- know what I mean when I say that this sounds like' Orange is, as such, a real stomper. Other alumni of the series are Mandrill, who squelch-clang noises are ace but that doesn't copy Primal Scream copying the Rolling appear here with the flaretastic "Can you get it", and AWB (Scotland's Deity( trying to necessarily mean that the more squiggly-bleep-etc etc Stones. Which of course, doesn't mean that "Love 45" is the better great contribution to the world of funk), with the marvellous "Stop the noises you can get in per second the music abject rubbish. Its just not very good, that's all. gets. Anyhow, whilst we mere mortals wait for the rani". Another tune worth noting-which might be of particular interest to day we can understand what the hell Aphex is up to the analogue keyboard trainspotters-is the totally surreal 'Turn off the lights" by Larry-Young's Fuel which starts off with a beautiful vocal from JOY RIDER - Seven sisters E.P. (Paradox) now, his back catalogue has been shamelessly rifled A promising El' that sounds uncannily like Therapy? before Laura Logon and then descends into a demented groove featuring Mr to put together this album. they went all rawk and started appearing in Kerrang and Young himself armed to the teeth with ludicrously melodic farting Bringing together all the tracks off the Monsters of Rock festivals. Unfortunately the lead track is noises, "Didgeridoo" and "Xylem Tubes" El's, with the weakest, too reminiscent of days in sixth form hands. The only dodgy moment here is "Who's in town" by Nature Boys "Analogue Bubblebath 1" and some other bits and But if they keep up the energy and quality of the others, an (featuring Godfather) which brings new depth of meaning to the word pieces, it's a good selection from his best upbeat stuff exciting future awaits. Worth a listen. which is hard to get hold of now. "Flaphead" is so 'd 't'. Oh well, I suppose that if you're going to include songs from solid it's almost edible "Phloem" is a sinister rubbery 1988 then you're asking for trouble. If you're into funk, but not quite sure - where to start, then you could do a lot SIMIAN AND THE BANSHEES - Stormer (Polydor) boing gone mad thrashing out a slow breakbeat. Now, the obvious thing to do here would be to mention worse than buying this album. "Polynomial-C" is a heady dark swirl of metallics. Siouxsie's age and best before dates. So, 1 won't do that. This The impassive humour shows through in the tampon CO1 ord is pleasurable enough, sounding kind of "unplugged" at • • Nick Moffat ad samples on "Tamphex (I ledphuq mix)" - why stop .• • times. An alright song, in a non-committal sort of way. when your period starts? Indeed. Occasional virtual splats only heighten the gentle TRIBAL DRIFT - Dubs (ChM) arching beauty of "Analogue Bubblebath I'', but if A bit like transglobal Underground on speed this kale, you want weird try the QQT mix of "We have 4 whilst not really providing any moments of greatness, arrived." 3. 4itialin1: ‘&.icwisa..4r Nevertheless, it motors along quite nicely in trancy fashion. papa with ethnic instruments thrown in for good measure. Not 2. WPltg(ield one for Simon Mayo either, unfortunately. Claire Rowland BABES 1. Sorb Ike

t dos Ive Acti

(immunity Action is the second biggest society on surrounded by their fellow students. Consequently, it is quite because you want to and not ben It is often said campus behind Rag. There are approximately 750 possible for a student to complete their degree at Leeds and because you haven't done it or fee: members of Action from Leeds University, and not have had any significant contact with life outside the altitude we really dislike." that all about halt of these are involved in projects at any student population. One of the more innovative Act one time. On a conservative estimate, therefore, at Community Action has a prescribed role within the non- housing scheme based in the CF. students do is Cleast 10 per cent of Leeds University students will take part in student community as an agency providing volunteers to local area_ It aims to provide young hoc volunteer schemes organised by Action this year. specialist groups. forging an important link between the permanent accommodation by reme take. Action, Phil Newby is the sabbatical Action co-ordinator university and the rest of Leeds. project was the first of its kind in ti however. responsible for the overall administration of the society lit' is Out. why do so many students join ti on and commit 1993 It recently won the Come. also in charge of raising and distributing finance, although he which was sponsored by Tin' Time, allows has little direct control over the actual projects. Newby Touche Russ. Member's of LAT°, explained how Action was organised. 'We run 20 of the award from the Prince of Wales students the projects directly and on top of that we are involved in about 25 Join because you want to Enterprise) at the Granada studies I referral projects, where we can refer people to national groups Robert Abercrombie, a ce-ordina opportunity to like Age Concern and Mental Health Organisations. Things and not because you're the philosophy behind LATCH: like the homeless projects are run by local external agenei. • feeling guilty because you people help themselves. Wr give such as the St Anne's Day Centre and LATCH (Leeds Ache! disempowerment which is behind To Create Homes) - haven't done it or feel try to give them their lives back something Next week, Community Action launches "Action Week', ., sorry for people,. That's an homeless people who have otten back. AKIN nets initiative it, raise training standards and leyels of net and involve them in the build: awannes, nn the e,s.in•; that surround the various projects. attitude we really dislike that takes anything up to a year." %.,,, tic denies thit it s function was simply to serve as a The perspective builders sign a OJUMU went recruitment drive for Action. "Action Week is a new thing that to work on the house until its con has started this year It's part of what l wanted to do with themselves to projects? "Well," says Newby, "I don't reckon guaranteed a flat within the newb to see how Action during my term of office, which is to impniye the people loin just to put something on their CV, although when volunteers work on the building sr the society training aspect. A lot of our volunteers go out and tool you have done it for a while you end up with an awful lot of and can get involved in any asps unsupported because they haven't been properly trained experience and you gain the personal skills associated with the from plumbing to plastering, gait* has managed Basically, Action Week is going to be a load of workshops various projects. Currently, LATCH are Win! covering different aspects of voluntary work.- "Most of our volunteers join in the second year. They spend Meanwood Road which they Intern to forge a link A glance at the programme for the week ahead shows a the first year getting pissed and they're bored with that. contained flats. A single mother s variety of events focusing on a range of projects including They're bored with the lectures and they want to do something male friends will live in the other II between local homelessness, people with learning and physical disabilities a bit more constructive with their time. Then they see our Community Action has often br and deal awareness. posters and come to us." being an organisation run for people and Generally speaking, students tend to be an insular bunch. In Action are keen to dissociate themselves from a 'do-gooder' However, most Action volunte the first year they arc closeted together in residential halls and image. Newby says that Action welcomes new members, but it benefits derived from voluntet students. flats. The second year sees the majority congregate in Leeds ft, is important that people join for the right reasons: "loin themselves and the people they am

One of the most popular of the activities organised by Action is the 'Saturday Special' project. Every week events are organised for a group of children and young adults with learning difficulties. The Volunteers

id-day Saturday, lrgiona ot Marrt!,.•d that r,tk'. .1 .71.W.{1.11 at the After the mayhem had ended. I asked students stumble out ..t hurl I group, instantly recognised in.• an..I one of the ingainsers, Nivk Donovan, a FdlI11).1111., I, .1 .tri.L Ili Mbeds, feeling the effects of the wandered ovvr ..l id, kilo mate. third year history atudene about what Rll'1,10T1 '411LICITS 401.. previous night's over-indulgence and how's college'" as naturally as it I had made the project special. lie said: "It is i 11w Is settle down to watch a terrible western on link seen him last week (I was later one ot only a few special needs schemes Aid plower, she pee, BBC/ waiting for their hangover to informed by one of the voltihteer s that and has a particularly wide range of swimming time 41 week subside and the Brookside omnibus to Pete had a remarkable memory for faces.) children with (littering abilities, Also the with the children of single begin- Probably the last thing en their He is also a TV addict who loves The Rat. kids and parents enitov the project. We Mothers Who temporarily minds is the prospect of spending an When t asked him It he still watched the often receive thankvou letters from the live in the Woman's afternoon in the company of 15 aeargajja police soap he immediately launched into parents One of the fathers gave us a large Satsctuarti in Leeds. Before children and young adults on a bouncy a resume of one of last week's plots_ crate of beer last Christmas which was coming to Leeds she had castle in the 141 Evans lounge. Some of the children were very nice, but really it's special because of the previously taken part in her school's voluntani For the volunteers on the Saturday talkative, others were virtually silent One kids." scheme. Liz started volunteering at the start of last term after talking to a friend in the Old Bar Special project, it is exactly the type of of the quieter boys, Ashley, came over Undoubtedly, the highlight of Nick's who took part in the scheme. she enjoys the scenario they can expect each weekend time at Saturday Special was last •ear's project but admits the children are often a during term time. Saturday Special caters trip to EuroDisney The project received handful: "The kids go mad and run all over the for local youngsters (ages range frnm 5-24 A stranger to the group, I £2,00t) from Rag, while the rest of the place, a lot of the time they're uncontrollable. years old) with a variety of learning found the children very money was raised by parents and the Sometimes parents out for a quiet Sunday swim disabilities. Every Saturday lunchtime volunteers after EuroDisney had sent friendly. I was continually with their families get a bit annoyed.• they are collected from their homes in approached and them free tickets. The weekend was a north Leeds and taken to LUU. From here encouraged to join in the great success according to Nick who they embark on a variety of different recalled one of the funnier an ainents of activities and excursions. Since October, fun, but that was probably their stay in Eurnetisney: Saturday Special trips have included a because they had "One of the kids. fenny, was really tired Louise Bayliss is a third visit to Harry Ramsden's fish and chip exhausted the other after a day walking around EuroDisney, year Medicine student shop, the Temple Newsam urban farm volunteers. su we put her in a wheelchair and who volunteers for and at the end of last term they held a wheeled her across one of the bridges. Saturday Special She Christmas party in the Doubles bar. About hall' way across the bridge Jenny began working on Last weekend, I visited the project to and without a word climbed onto my got fed up, stood up and walked away. Saturday Club (a club tor watch the volunteers and children at back in anticipation of a piggy back ride, But a group of watching Italians wet• children in Annie v) work and play. Opening the door of the In contrast, Joanne would breathlessly amazed. thinking they had just seen a during her first vr.ar which RI Evans lounge, I walked into a barrage give me regular reports en how her miracle. They started exclaiming; 'mamma she then co-ordinated in 1111 of noise and activity. Volunteers and afternoon was progressing mia" and holding their crucitixes.- her second year. She sees children were chasing each other inside A stranger to the group, I found the As the end of the afternoon her Saturday volunteering as "a break from the inflated bouncy castle. while the less children very friendly I was continually approached, the children were rounded being a student and a chance to nits with hyperactive members watched benignly approached and encouraged to join in the up and taken home by minibus. The other people in the community. It is l•Prj• from surrounding chairs or helped fun, but that was probably because they volunteers aeon eurprisingle chirin, after enjoyable and too good an option to miss themselves to the a5,snarnent of snacks in had exhausted the other volunteers, the exertions-of the previous tew bouts. when you are a student Even though ,..he is the corner of the room. Paradoxically. despite the frenetic unfortunately I feel ehatteresi. Never studying for a nm•-consuming degree, she I had been to Saturday Special once last activity, the whole afternoon was mind, although I've missed fireekskie at says that she hopes to continue to take part in year and recognised a few levee among curiously relaxing due to the pleasant this rate I will be home us time to watch Action projects in the latter stages of her the group. However, 1 was pleasantly atmosphere around the room Blind Dote_ course, on

excuse you're feeling guilty Cl sorry for people. prat's an

fiction projects is LATCH, a iftapeltown and Meanwood timeless people in Leeds with n- eating derelict houses. The 'the ct?untry when it began in !triunity Enterprise Award, es and the accountancy firm ill received the _prestigious s (the patron of Community 5, in Manchester. 'rater of the project, explained The idea is to help homeless fir aim to address the a lot of homelessness and We recruit young single fallen through the housing aiding and renovation process

contract that requires them neepletion. In return they are fly renovated house. Student -14Ie for one afternoon a week red of the building process, sing skills along the way. ,.king; on a house on the 31 to transform into two self- 0011 occupy one, whilst two (Oaf. ,teen criticised in the past for grand by smug do-gooders. avers would agree that the qttering are shared between 1 On to help,

The Road to Wellville (PG) Odeon Cinema FLM Dir: Alan Parker Stars: Anthony Hopkins. Matthew Broderick, Bridget Fonda, John Cusack

film about excrement murderous bath (which and enemas doesn't midway through the film Apromise much of the kills two unfortunate The hitman wit and charm that inmates) and some rather characterised Alan Parker's vicious wet towel smackers. last outing, The Commitments. These gadgets would be Hard-as-nails hitman Leon But adapted from a book by more at home in a Warner takes up with a Lolita- T Coraghessen Boyle, The Bros. Loony Toon than a Road to Wehulk. concerns health farm, and the same lookalike in this stylish itself with exactly this. could also he said for thriller from the director of The setting for two hours Anthony Hopkins as Kellogg, Nikita, Jean-Luc Besson. of toilet humour is the who looks very much like a Batikx-reek Sanitoriurn m the certain animated rabbit OLIVER MAXEY dodges the and her early twentieth century, run Broderick and Fonda just try bullets in Leon. by the a-eator of the comflake and look innocent all through Or John Harvey Kellogg. the film, even after both of Among its inhabitants are them have just discovered the household chores done for him. Will and Eleanor Lighthody joys of masturbation of only does he Strangely fora New York film, (Matthew Broderick and (Broderick is administered by N"move without Leon is written and directed by a Bridget Fonda), a couple an electrical jockstrap while sound, kill Frenchman (Luc Besson) and stars anxious to regain their health. Fonda has it done by a another one (Jean Reno), but is made Meanwhile Charles Ossing German evert). without entirely in English. In some respects A third of the way (John Cusack) is involved in emotion and the film echoes the mother of through the film I got the all setting up a dubious New York films, Taxi Driver. The feeling that what I was really disappear without trace", conallak► business with his friendship between the emotionally watching was a dirtied-up partner Goodloe Bender and but his best friends are a retarded Leon and the worldly Carry On film and no amount Kelk ;g's estranged adopted plant and a 12-year-old girl Mathilde bears a passing ► of wood-panelled sets and son George. George takes out resemblance to the DeNtrolodie glossy photography could newly enrolled in the his resentment against his Foster relationship in Scorcese's dispel this feeling_ The gags father by throwing cereal orphan club by crooked classic. But whereas the city becomes may be more -lewd and boxes full of shit at the drug cops. This man is Leon a central character in Taxi Driver, in sanatorium patients. explicit; but at the end all the jokes on enemas and and it is under his guidance Leon it merely provides a backdrop The health farm enforces a for the pure form of love that is strict regime of enemas and erections were carried off that young waif Mathilde more successfully by the generated between the two, born of milk baths, sexual undergoes a Karate Kid their desire for compassion and stimulation is discouraged Carry On team. Here toilet humour is mixed with style training programme in happiness in the big, bad city. ("An erection is a flagpole on The baddest guy of all is played Your grave," states the good tragedy giving an uneven order to master the result that at some points is by Gary Oldman, oozing evil and doctor) while meat eating technique and theory of a complete with Dracula-isms that he and alcohol are absolutely quite funny but at others is a professional hit-man (or has apparently been unable to shake forbidden. Various torturous drag to sit through off. As a character he is a little flat automated health aids are 'cleaner') that will allow her and prone to muttering tosh Like among them a employed, Faisal A Qureshi to wreak vengeance on the "Death is whimsical today" but if had guys. you accept him as a symbol of Ilowever,we are not talking corruption and greed he is a suitably Barcelona(12) demonic arch-enemy for our unlikely Pictureville Cinema about straight to video rubbish of FILM the "this time its personal" pair of Platonic lovers. Dir Whit Stillman The great achievement of the film Stars: Taylor Nichols, Chris Eigeman variety here.Violence has made is the way in which it balances the them what they are and, bonded brutality of Leon and Mathilde's by it, the odd couple enter into a environment with their capacity to one-parent family of share tenderness and warmth against ts not otten that vou bother to go to Bradford to see a film, convenience. She is trained and all odds; love blooms even in the but a trip to Pichirevilltr really is worth the journey. It has looked after and he gets his crack-happy ghettos of New York. Icheap tickets, popcorn at bargainprices and big, comfy seats - all you need to enjoy an excellent film Indeed, an excellent film Is exactly what you expect Walt Stillman's Barcelona to be. following his highly-acclaimed debut production Metropolitan. Unfortunately, the film doesn't live up to this expectation and proves to be disappointingly lifeless and rarely moving. States and Spain in the late seventies. He Throughout the video, as in the The film follows the characters Fred and Ted (Taylor presents interesting, sometimes amusing Plantation- wall-mounted prints, images from Nichols and Chris Eigemann), two middle-class American comparisons of Spanish and American opinions ART Maud Stiller the 1940s Orson Welles' film of lane cousins living and working in post-Franco Barcelona. on issues like sexuality, marriage, religion, Eyre and passages of text are Constructed from fragmented glimpses of their everyday lives, politics, and particularly fascism and the University Gallery flashed across the screen. The the film unfortunately consists of little more than political awkward situations that arose from them, artist's statement that "Plantation is entanglements with dark, villainous looking Spanish blokes There are a few very witty scenes in the film, lantation is a new photowork a meditation on the fictonal life of and brief flings with various leggy Catalan girls. which provide the bulk of its entertainment installation by the black Berthe Mason, the quintessential To a certain extent, this uneventful plot iis forgivable. value. However, these sections are not enough to pGlaswegian artist Maud Mad black woman in the attic" is Stillman uses it well to provide a clear and questioning insight compensate for the unadventurous and slow Sutter. Currently on show in the admittedly a little confusing. For into the problematic political situation between the United development of the rest of the production. which University Gallery, the exhibition those who have not read the novel seems to stagger from beginning to end with a was heavily criticised by Mary or seen the Orson Welles painful lack of action and Sara of the Yorkshire Post. who production, the references may be adventure. The main characters referred to the work as a, lost. The most obvious link is in Stillman creates to convey his "narcissistic self-indulgent ego the title, Plantation, which has ideas are equally lifeless. Far from trip." connotations of nurture and repair individual, as the easily confused Hung on the walls of the gallery while also bringing to mind the Fred and Ted illustrate, the are colourprints documenting an sugar plantations of the West characters are invariably shallow operation, sometimes overlayed, Indies, from which the mad and easily divided into sometimes interspersed with text. woman in the novel came. stereotypical categories of The prints are stills from a forty Sulter is ultimately concerned promiscuous, deceptive and minute video of the artist's body with the treatment of women. She communist Spaniard, or undergoing what is known as makes tangible the relationships nationalistic, materialistic, but "Reconstructive Surgery." a between madness, race and democratic American. technique developed in the USA, femininity ("hysteria" has its Barcelona is predominantly which Sulter claims to have, origins in the word for "womb' 1 concerned withTwrsonal lives "saved (her) womb." through the consideration of a and politics dOn't expect much Mary Sara confesses that, as a fictional character to whom she Wood. gore and action. Although vegetarian, she found the video relates. She finds a voice and a it may deal perceptively with piece which was screened aspart vision for what has traditionally important world issues, the film of the installation a little hard to been locked-up or castrated. The takes itself far too seriously at the stomach. I too would not viewer may, like Mary Sara, be expense of entertainment and recommend this to the squeamish. offended, but at least the enjoyment. Sara's real problem, however, is opportunity has arisen to question not with the artist's use of her own that reaction. body, but with her references to Anne-Marie Tasker Charlotte Bronte's Jane Eyre, Ann Coxon ARTS 12/13 Y Tim Vine Harvey Milk Bar

in, Vine walks onto stage with a scarf tied around his Thead. -They call me Scarface," he drawls. This raises a ripple of sniggering in the audience. Vine whips the scarf from around his head and continues. "So I went to ice 'Schindler's List' and this woman behind me started wailing and the man behind me got harpooned." He stops for a second as the audience breaks into full bellied laughter. With a glint in his eve he proceeds, "I started using lighter hid for my car.. so to start it on windy days you have to cup your hands around the bonnet.' Rakish glance as he leans heavily on the microphone stand. The audience is still laughing from the second joke. The pace speeds up. "So I ran this marathon and my mate said what position did you finish in? I said dais! Nine assumes frozen runner position)..."

"They call me Scarface," he drawls.

Hold it! hold it! This is nut just Vine's intro, it is his act. Some of you at this point may be wondering how such a collection of seemingly lame jokes can make an audience laugh. The essence of Vine's act hes in his delivery of stunningly simple one-liners but at such a speed they create a snowball effect of laughter that rums the entire show into one of the most original comedy acts I have ever seen. Vines jokes are all word plays surrounded by harking mad surreal situations. Ii you don't get one of the barrage of jokes he throws at you 10 seconds later you'll be laughing at the next one.

Vine machine guns his one- liners at the audience

Jo Brand (18) At a time when most women quickly dispelled by the Vine machine guns his one-liners comedians are descending into standard of the rest of the cast, at the audience while laconically Polygram Video VIDEO cosy domestic humour, (Did 11 ;11.1 TI1 who are each individual gems of slumped on the microphone . This anyone see Victoria Wood's mediocrity. The Proscenium works so successfully because Christmas show? Not exactly Players may be an amateur ever trust a man with The Diary of Anne Frank Vine assumes the air of a slightly revolutionary, was it? Dawn dramatics society, but this is no eccentric but basically alright testicles: a classic Jo Brand French as the Vicar of Dibley? Civic Theatre excuse for such a complete lack statement, and as you bloke in the pub. Your laughter is N Pass the sickbag, please.) Jo of acting ability. instantaneous, a quick joke fix might expect the subject of men's represents a refreshing change. it, Diary of Anne Frank is a This stage adaptation of the imperfection pops up again and universally affecting first - which is maintained at a side Not that the video is a complete diary, by Frances Goodrich and splitting level for half an hour. It again in the fat bird's new video, success. It's too long for one thing hand account of the Albert Hackett (yes, they sound a compilation from her recent TV suffering caused by the anti- Vine diverged into the typical fare (not that size matters, folks!) and like professionals, don't they) of stand up comedians - political series, Through the Cakehofe. Also while Jo's stand up routines are semitic Nazi policies of the does little to bring out the present are Jo's other obsessions, Second World War. Along with satire or anecdotes of social mostly funny somehow her human aspects of the situation comment, the jokes would food, fags and fornication. deadpan delivery doesn't transfer two other Jewish families, the and instead seems intent on Would Jo be as funny if she Franks went into hiding at the instantly seem cheesy and too well in the sketches. The only emphasising the domestic unnecessary. He dues not swear. didn't make jokes about being fat time she attempts to be political top of an old warehouse sq_uabbles and rifts between the and hating men? Well, no building. Anyone who has read He does not talk about wanking. is in an 'Oh no, look at the state of inhabitants of the 'Secret He uses no devices used by other probably not but let's face it, the NHS' sketch which falls very the diary will have been amazed Annexe'. which female amongst us doesn't by the maturity and hope with alternative comedians. flat. She's much better with jokes The play's final scene depicts Vine's style is unique but it is enjoy sniggering at jokes about about sex and cakes, preferably which the 13-year old Anne Otto Frank, father of Anne, the size of men's tackle, their Frank faced the horrific ordeal based on a very narrow range of simultaneously. reflecting upon the magnitude comedy. Typical -alternative" stupidity, their ignorance, and oh This video is probably for of being denied all freedom for of the Holocaust to which the three years. cvmedlans can diversify their acts yes, the size of their tackle. devout Jo fans only, especially as diary stands testament. Every to include all sorts of other stuff Lots of men hate Jo Brand, as the series is being repeated on This leads one to wonder last drop of melodrama is why, in the Proscenium Players' and can top up their ideas with do lots of women (usually the television at the moment anyway. milked and 'breathtaking' topical gags. Vine includes a small stick-like ones who do lots of Alternatively you could give it to interpretation of The Diary of pauses of several seconds are exercise and can't survive without Anne Frank, the protagonist is amount of topical material but someone as a present. However, if taken between each word, with otherwise he may be hampered in a boyfriend). Why is this? Could they weigh 20 stone, are built like portrayed as an irritating, sadly comic results. grinning little trollop who the future by his limited range. it be because, horror of horrors, a tank and can drink fifteen pints To survivors of the Holocaust However. I hope he proves me she has a reputation for of lager, well then they're prances around in ballet shoes and their relatives this play annoying, the fuck out of wrong. Watch out devoted being...you know, the F-word, a probably Jo Brand so they'll have must seem like a cruel joke: exponents of the rambling FEMINIST? Could it be because seen it already. everybody. closer to parody than drama, the Any questions as to why the anecdote, the one liner may be she is one of the few aggressive production is little short of making a comeback_ 'rim Vine is women comedians around and lead role was given to an actress offensive. incapable of properly stressing big news for 1995. allows women to get their own Liz Wright back on the male of the species? Gemma Wallace the simplest sentences are Chris Williams BOOKS 14 The Miracle Shed by Philip MacCann Faber & Faber £8.99 What's up Doc? harles Baudelaire, the first truly urban poet, wrote, 150 Cyears ago, of the 'sinuous Scott Bradfield's diagnosing the american condition coils of old capitals / where even horror weaves a magic spell'. new novel These lines capture perfectly the traverses the essence of Philip MacCann's bizarre and collection of 10 short stories, each a disturbing and unusual demonic world of portrayal of decaying inner cities suburban America. and their deprived and 'singular' Steve Ranger denizens. MacCann is a fine technician wades through the who exhibits an extensive and corpses. expressive vocabulary. He elegantly evokes a world of back cott Bradfield's black street abortions, of casual comedy combines the prostitution, of murderous calculated. g.rotesqueness schoolboys and human trash. His of John Waters with a characters belong to a moral as sublime ability to capture well as a social underclass, and parody the nuances subsisting in the anonymity of Sof the various species of American filth and squalor in cities past and self-improvement. Just as Waters modern including London, Belfast, Bradfield does in Serial Mem, Dublin and Milton Keynes. takes an image of traditional Like the house orUsher, each American wholesomeness, the brick of every building absorbs its old grandmother, and sweet inhabitant's capacity for evil and transforms her into a gun-toting perversity, the cityscape reflecting righter of suburban wrongs. rather than determining the Emma Oltallahan, after ugliness and anxieties of the spending her entire married life as human psyche. Beneath the an obedient drone, finally decides 'scrapmetal skies' and the 'bruised that her paranoid, egotistical and clouds', behind the brutal racist husband Marvin is part of uniformity of tower blocks and what's wrong with America. So each crumbling wall, there lurks a she blows his head off with one of ILA11111.11111&==51M1111,1_, secret life - its uniqueness defined his prized shot-guns, buries him in purely in terms of its morbid the garden, and begins to live her fantasies and flawed sexuality. with lists of 'qualities I most daughter Cassie is a practitioner of callousness that lies behind the life as she had always wanted to - There is Cosmo, who is admire about myself' and, of a number of these lunatic self- quest for self-enlightenment. It is a eating junk food, drinking brandy attracted only to old men; Trace, advancement systems which blame point he makes delicately and in the bath, and finding herself a course. 'what's wrong with who is abused by her sister; and America'. At the same time, you all of life's ills on bad Karma and intelligently, never with easy lover. She also has to bump off a Sammy who is clinically nosy neighbour and Marvin's begin to realise, the diary is also a uneven inner polarities. Marvin, sloganeering_ diagnosed as asexual and greedy lawyer, but her troubles the 'Church of However,Where Wrong with record of Emma's descent into too, is a member of consequently seems devoid of re-ally start when the bodies refuse Immaculate Reason'. Yet neither America is not all doom and madness, as her arguments with personality and 'halt made of to stay quiet in the garden, and the obnoxious Marvin. who are able to relate to others in gloom: Emma's psychotic energy is develop the habit of wandering complains about the way in which anything but the most selfish and finally shown to be positive and light'. Each persona assumed by back into the house for a snack, or she is portraying him in the diary, cynical way: Cassie abandons her regenerative, indicating that there MiicCann speaks with a distinctive to complain about each other, continue and increase in intensity. son, while Marvin retreats into his may be something chaotic, voice, with different rhythms and which is a real problem with her Bradfield also investigates the nuclear war fantasy and gun liberating and beautiful within the inflections, the most unsettling new love and her grandson living American obsession with therapy collection. forgotten corners of the suburban belonging to the neurotic narrator in the house. and psychological advancement. radfield is making a simple American psyche. of "Harvestman". Bradfield presents the novel as The novel is an exploration of the point; that everyday America MacCann's dark and erotic Emma's diary, a record of her quest for individual freedom Bis caught up in an What's Wrong With surrealism creates a brooding, escape form the drudgery of her which results from the under- institutionalised selfishness which sinister atmosphere, as if hidden turmer hfe, valuation of personal relationships manifests itself both in the America is published by desires rise like a thin mist over packed in suburban America. Emma's paranoia of the gun-lobby and the Picador price £5.99 the city. 'There are mixed-up feelings in the air,' comments one character. S..grimy dreams blowing off the concrete of the cultural scene of the '60s and '70s. lower block.' perhaps more Come Together: Wiener's examination of social issues is The characters exist in a world than any other John Lennon in His Time always sufficiently detailed. He is haunted by their own psychic kind of book, particularly interested in investigating residue. The narrator of "Tender" can be completely by Jon Wiener the extent to which pop music can uses his 'inside dream mechanism' useless. This is for change the status quo, showing how to extract meaning from recurring a variety of Faber & Faber £9.99 events such as the Beatles' arrival in homoerotic images, aestheticising reasons. Either America in 1966 stirred up anti-war and transfiguring his world. Even the author is completely incompetent, overly feeling and religious controversy. The framework for Come rubbish and decay assume a biased toward or against his/her subject, or Together is provided by Wiener's research into the FBI's interest magical, if grim, beauty. MacCann merely seeking to rake over sensational events inl_ennon. He shows how, over a period of time, J.Edgar presents a world uninhabitable from the life in question. John Wiener's Hoover's boys compiled huge files on the ex-Beatle and except through profound biography of John Lennon (reissued 11 years attempted to throw him out of the States because of fears indifference or arbitrary acts of the after first being published) is a rare gem in a surrounding his ability to incite protest. Lennon was frequently imagination. seam of fools gold. One might expect from criticised by radical political and youth movements for selling Only in the title story do a Wiener's background, he is a professor of out', but what emerges from Come Together is the group of individuals form history at the University of California, that this establishment's fear of a man who eventually engaged himself book would he scrupulously researched with the struggles for peace and equality for women and for authentic relationships, finding However, he transcends the level of mere factual other races happiness and love in the artificial accuracy and produces a scintillating document An interesting strand of the book compares Lennon to Mick paradise of "The Miracle Shed". not only_of his subject but of a whole epoch. Jagger and Bob Dylan. During the late sixties the Beatles were Important though it is for all the Wiener's approach to Lennon's life is an perceived by the New Left as soft and commercial, while the characters, love has various interesting one. He seeks to analyse his position Stones were the had boys - shaking a fist at convention and connotations. What does it mean within a tumultuous political inequality through their sheer arrogance and celebration of when, in "Dark Hour", a man framework both in Britain and the youth liberation. Wiener feels that there is a problem with this croaks 'I fucking love you' to a boy United States_ This is not just a book approach and that underneath Lennon's initial refusal to he masturbates for $•0? Above all about the Beatles years, as it become involved with 'revolution' there lurked a man who was love is shown to be something concentrates on the organic genuinely concerned. physical, something which 'leaves development of Lennon's political Wiener does not seek to idolise Lennon as a revolutionary its mark' on people and is cheap consciousn ess - from the early sixties through to hero at the vanguard of civil rights uprisings. He clearly brings and mass-produced. his death Those seeking a muck-raking journey out Lennon's failings and emphasises his initial reluctance to In The Miracle Shed the through Lennon's sex life and experimentation with become involved in controversy because of his position in the redemptive power which raises drugs will be disappointed. These issues are examined Beatles. Wiener also confronts the media creation of Yoko Ono Dostoevsky's characters from the by Wiener; but not in a voyeuristic, titillating manner. For as a destructive influence upon Lennon, portraying her as a sewers of St.Petersburg is absent. example, he locates Lennon's use of LSD and heroin within a more positive figure who instigated John's involvement in context which is both political and personal - his drug use But it would be out of place here. being a was, of issues relating to the peace movement and feminism. Come Sublimity Ls, as one character drily escaping the dictates of convention but also a Together provides way of evading his increasing anxiety concerning childhood a magnificent insight into a man who, premarks, ions.. 'only dirt with through his music and his relationship with first wife Cynthia, and his actions, sought to make the world a better place. Greg Moore Nomad Carrie Together also provides an insight into the whole Ian Maltby CLASSIFIEDS 15

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Gareth he out or student budget it's eery hard to but my heart will from the to speak to Minnie, Jo. Ben or Sid. Especially Wednesday evening Barbie Happy Valentine's day. her• in a matter of minutes' go wrong here. Will always try moment you wake up 'till you BUY AND SELL YOUR crew, Mc. Dave. Paul. John and The gorillagram and flowers are Hughes. Brilliant .stuff, especially and acrnmodate the largest jump into bed on Tuesday BOOKS AT BASEMENT Gareth. Tim, cheers Mate. 111 buy oft the way. I love you with all my considering you were surNNed parties at eery short notice." night. BOOKS, the secondhand you a pint tomorrow. heart. although not to the point of around so much. I astir big Quote Lilt handbook. Try us. LSR meeting for anyone bookshop In the Student l Mon Harry White is god. putting wacky heart scans onto the 1 lakes to the news team for their Lunch time specials aswell. involved in music , Dj's/ at the sin' site of LeedLs Tom Jones vs Barry White, who is page. 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We love you, we love you LUU. Jim Brodkin - star Full Hours tuition _a Contact Doug: Call Robin: 771683 NIGHTLINE 0831360214 0860 801 296 UDENT For information or someone to talk to. Primary elections for made your THE TOWN AND COUNTRY CLUB to find 8pm - 8am ideal rpstr, or Harriet I love you SS COOKRIDGE STREET LEEDS every night of term. Leeds Student Editor so. Mils 0532 100100 1995/1996 Ire CP4tdit (Audi 0132 412999 4M Mat 46111111. The Typing Bureau Confidential. Tilkets subj.(' to booklet( lee. LEEDS 47 Headingley Lane Tel: 442602 The election will take place on Monday EA9d.s5 ,0 Leeds LS6 1 DP 13th February at 5.15pro at the LMUSU WED 15TH office.The following people are eligible BABA MAAL Tel: 758493 FIN Superviser required WORD PROCESSING to stand or vole. 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It should be the closest race for years. At stake are the most powerful positions in the students union, including the prized role of President. There are 17 candidates - the most for a decade - bidding for five sabbatical posts Ed Harte Business Management on LMUSU Exec. As polling week nears, the candidates Born: 17.06.74 Origin: Northern Ireland present their rival manifestoes so you can decide

:.1 Ow best education wilt better library and re-sources. HOW TO VOTE •For carnpaign.s against had housing and student debt. All students at LMU are /Fin campaigns on student safety. and against homophobia and racism. eligible to vote. Simply go •For campaigns on AIDS awareness. drugs to one of the information informatinn and healthy sex. For an improved and more effective course rep points, at Beckett Park, systein City Site or Brunswick Terrace Coffee Bar between Monday 13 and Friday 17 February Sarah BSc Nursing Born: 25_09.72 Lufkin Origin' Norfolk

Equal omortunitica policy Increased profile of coarse reps and their input into EMU and the students union. For a quality audit for LW! to increase reaching standards. Women's issues such as safety. Disabled issues, Minority issues especially involving 1.GB. mature studaas and ethnic minorities. Housing issues especially around rent and safety. Education issues - grant ems, debts, anonymous marking Keep Wetita-sday pm free fur sport and leisure. ELECTION Better communication between students union and course reps.

Dominic BA Consumer THE race for the Presidency could per cent. five points clear of Services go all the way as the three Seladdock and 17 ahead of Clein. Margetson Born: 22.03.74 candidates prepare for a week of "I'm very pleased that students Origin: Surrey campaigning. writer David Smith. are showing from the beginning Opinion polls show Simon who they want to support" Caffrey Ti, conittnic to improve the course rep system and to Caffrey holding a narrow laid over said. "T obviously hope to improve 5 further it being recognised as a single qualification. rivals Clare Maddock and Richard my standing when the camplugns in work between thc university and the students nein. But the margin is so tight that start for rear onion in ensuring the tarsi possible results for all three believe they can still win. Matitl....:k hopes hi bocome the IMetropolitan students in education. Caffrey currently stands on 41 ftrst female President for Its years, 1 shall adhere to the student voice and always be happy to lend a friendly car to any student views_ To recognise the many important issues that will affect students, and reflect this in the campaigns run. CANDIDATES FOR LMUSU PRESIDENT

Simon Caffrey Richard Clein Clare Maddock asta r BEng Comma Neely Born: 05.06.70 ('Chirpie') Origin: Antrim BA Business Studies BA Public Relations Bsc Nursing Representation - Effective representation with attitude. Born: 1.10.71 Born: 29.6.71 Born: 30.3.73 lime the arguments of quality assurance to achieve Origin: London Origin: Liverpool Origin: The Wirral results for students, Course rep training - semester-based [minute and What is your most unappealing feature? What is your most unappealing feature? What is your most unappealing feature? support throughout. the year - making cure I'm I loin says Its the a Jumper I got for Xmas. My sense of humour accessible and accountable to you. Seeking to introduce My nose and the tact I look like Woody Alien. NVQ for coutse reps, as an incentive and a rewanl What political party do you support? What political party do you support? What political party do you support? for all their hard work. None. I take each issue as it comes. I take and Errs... Liberals Democrats None Educational research - On institutional and national evaluate the facts and arguments presented by all issues— an informed course rep is an effective course the parties and make my own decision rep. What Is your greatest regret? What Is your greatest regret? What is your greatest regret? Campaigns a go go - For students in problem areas of Not being able to ease a young child's life in grants, debt, housing, creche facilities, mature students. Always wyirig it s my round . Asking Faddy Ashdown to 'skin -up'. intensive care financial support and others as mandated by you. If you died tomorrow, with what words If you died tomorrow. with what words It you died tomorrow, with what words would people remember you? would people remember you? BA Social Polio and would people remember you? 11; Anna Scott YOU know tt AdmIn makes sense. Student sense - It's nut my round I gut the last one. She lived with energy Born: 18.08.74 Origin: Liverpool I want to ensure that the students union becomes Vote Richard Clem and you'll get a commitment am a non-political student and it is vital that the the central focus of student life. to: union remains apolitical. i am able to work with a I will continue implementing the course rep ALMS Student safety - lobby the university for improved range of people. I will operate an open door policy. To increase the total number of members at programme, encouraging communications between hall security. Ensure continuation of women's wli the SU and course reps. ultimately leading to better LMUSU and therefore Increase the overall minibus. Equal access for every individual to L.abfLr • representation for students at all academic levels. awareness of student issues such as poor housing. SponsiCtiltund clubs Ensure funding for a wide disabled, mature. minority groups. Research and campaign for students in the problem grunt curs, student debt and improving academic range of clubs, particularly minority groups. Increased awareness of safety issues areas of grams, debt. housing, safety, anonymous standard.) such as computer suites. Getting YOU involved Increased library, computing and student office marking. as well as course materials provision. Increase the activity of the SU commercial Without your involvement the Students Union facilities. I will also lobby the university for a 24-hour computer services so that it will be. possible for us to keep will be dominated by tiny cliques. Ensure Increased pressure on the Government about grant lab and library service. union prices as low as possible_ Continuation and expansion of the course rep cuts, unfair rent prices and the Criminal Justice Bill. am a non-political candidate. who also supports I want to increase the total number of clubs scheme, Regular visits to the halls of residence. Increased spans facilities in line with die increased keeping Wednesday afternoons free for sport and and societies by introducing a more social aspect Surgeries in the Exec offices to listen to your student numbers, leisure. to the union. views. Survey members to find out what YOU Prmunse LMU to provide creche facilities for want single parent facilities. 1 0 FE SIMON CAFFREY Nu.I for President This week you have an opportunity to elect an YOU KNOW IT MAKES SENSE. effective, hard working, dedicated President. For STUDENT SENSE ACTION not words, vote Richard Clein VOTE I FOR CLARE MADDOCK LEEDS STII)FTIT Ricky February 11). 1905 17 CANDIDATES FOR VP BECKETT PARK VP COMM UNICAliONS David Foulger Sam 131 a Yoav Factor Paul Harris Andrew Salt 0.1gm SE London Combined Studies Urban Development Public Relations I am Social chairman of Born: 72.71 Born: 16.4.74 Born: 9.1.70 Men's. and Mixed hockey Origin: London Origin: Walsall Origin: Salford clubs. I have two years experience of living in halls on I have lived in Leeds for the past four years, Aim§ I am a conscientious student, intent on enjoying increased student awareness of students Beckett Park. which means I appreciate the dunng which tune I took a year off from study student life to the full. I am a friendly outgoing union operations. facilities. policies and person who has the interests of students at heart. diversity of issues facing students who live to work as a personnel and public relations events . there. I am a thorough. organised and officer at a local company. I have three years previous experience within Improve the profile of the students union professional individual who has the necessary the financial sector which has left me with good AIMS within the student body, local businesses, experience for the job. Improve support services, communication. budgetary and business skills such as housing and local community. WHAT WILL I DO? welfare advice, available to students at B.P. WHAT WILL I DO? Increase the students union budget to will listen to you - and represent your views, Increase awareness of facilities and events will enhance the facilities on site. This will enable us to continue to improve and thereby endeavouring to involve all students in provided by LMUSU at the Beckett Park site. include a wider variety of meals in the canteen expand on the facilities and services we their union activities. Negotiate with banks to provide automated cash and bread and milk to be sold. offer. I will continue to develop the union and its point machines. Lobby to introduce better security for students I shall adhere to the student voice and services, using knowledge and experience on campus. will always be happy to lend a friendly To promote events at Beckett Park. gained this year VOTE ANDREW SALT FOR ear to any student's views. VOTE YOA V VOTE FOR EXPERIENCE VP BECKETT PARK VOTE FOULGER Nu. 1 FOR VP COMMUNICATIONS CANDIDATES FOR VP ADMINISTRATION Ink Richard Win*. Nyelow. to. James 11.7c• Deborah Omar= annicaa Gareth Adesrlars, Warrior Sam- 2.1-1 Pete Imams* Owns anginau. Mar. Rom: 14.74 Hartigan 00414' 4644ana• Hartman flan. 27 11.72 Noires Ron 4.4.71 Garland a 01401 London ,a OM.. OW al Ilan Otigkr. Badfa I am a hard working. I have been wive in the Having dealt I enjoy getting involved in I would try to expand determined student who students union since the successfully with student life, snot just the student involvement enjoys the social side of life. I am rim year T ans the best candidate for numerous problems on behalf of my social fife). I am a course rep and also through clubs and societies. There is confident of handling any problem job not hall. I feel equipped to represent the a member of the Student Rep the Isle In my experience and enough feedback from the which may arise and am equipped to the students union. views of LMU's 20,000 students to Council. This year I shall be helping ,kxiication within students as to their personal activities. communicate the implications am willing to work hard to ensure that the highest levels of university the VP at Beckett Park to organise At present LMU students are not involved. management. the fun day in May all students at LMU can understand the fully aware of what services LMUSI.' WHAT I WILL DO and WHAT I WILL DO Altos workings of the students union provides and how it is nut - it shall be I will highlight the services of the I will run administrative affairs of I will endeavour to ensure the smooth what it can do for them. my job to make them aware. students union and actively represent the union in a professional way. running and continued expansion of want to make the setting up of a I hope to increase funding for the students' views right up the senior focusing on your needs and wants. union clubs and societies, so that society an understandable prucess tot minority sports clubs. which ate otters management level_ sec a growth in the Campaign for increased funds from many more of you can get involved. all as I would like to overlooked at the moment. Improve union awareness for all the university for clubs and I will he looking to increase the number of societies currently running. I will ensure that the union becomes students on all sites, both fulI'time and societies. students union budget so all clubs and OGMs will be made easier to more accountable for societies' funds part-time. through the use of targeted Liaise with the university to ensure societies can benefit from better understand so that if you want to he its this has been a grey area in the publicity for each campus. Also to that Wednesday afternoons remain facilities and services. heard. you will know how. past. increase the speed and efficiency of free for sport and recreation . I shall adhere to the student voice and I shall ensure that the new Kirkstall LMUSU publicity. Improve union facilities and suppori will always he happy to knd an ear to SO DO YOURSELVES A development will contain a hat and issues such as housing and sexual any student views. FAVOUR AND VOTE DEBORAH other facilities, run by the. union VOTE R1f711A RD WARRIOR No.I awareness campaigns. VOTE JAMES HARTIGAN HARTMAN. PROBABLY THE FOR COMMUNICATIONS TIJE_$TUDENT'S CHOICE, YOU KNOW IT MAKES SENSE, BEST CHOICE YOU'LL MAKE VOLE SEARED" NOKF.SNo.1 VOTE PETE GARLAND STUDENT SENSE THIS YEAR FORSLADIAINabTRAnON

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18 LEEDS STUMM!' i-ndu, Folmar) Ili t9,{ti 1 LACK A E says he likes doing is not ready to retire just yet. We are probably going to see "regular things", but Roger Tanya Veingard talks him run for at least another HBlack is certainly no "regular four years. He wants to guy". I mean this guy won four exclusively to 400m compete in the nest major gold medals before his 21st Olympics and his ultimate birthday, he made history in 1990 ambition is to win the gold. runner Roger Black This is all a far cry from by being Britain's first 400 metre Where he thought he'd end athlete to retain two European ihe cameras. He is even mother's dream either for up. When he was younger he Gold medals and he's now ranked themselves or for their daughters., and for those anted to be a doctor and fourth in the world at 400 metres. with athletic ambitions, he is their tnspiration. was accepted to read When I was given the chance to spend the It must he hard coping with all the attention medicine at Southampton University in 1985. His night (and the morning) with him in a top which comes with being a world-class athlete. At least with journalism there is a degree of studies at school were very Glasgow hotel, I wasn't going to turn it anonymity. But Roger enjoys the recognition. He much geared towards that. down. You just don't, do you? says it's not a major problem and he never gets Although he did a lot of sport is he your boyfriend?" a young female fan any hassles. I don't suppose that it really is a at school including playing asked me as I turned up with Roger to the ITV set hassle to arrive at the Scottish Television Studios rugby as an England of 'What's Up Doc' where he was promoting a at seven o'clock in the morning with a crowd of Schoolboy triaIist• he was a junior athletics event for his sponsors Reebok. young girls greeting him with red roses. late developer as far as "Where's your boyfriend? I've got his breakfast." athletics was concerned. He only started runners by gaining silver in the World asked one of the production team. I suppose it Admiration compeung seriously when Ile was I K. Championships in Tokyo and breaking 45 was quite flattering to be mistaken for Roger seconds eleven times to win the Grand Prix Final Black's girlfriend But unfortunately he's already Roger is fit Really fit. You have to he in an Success in Barcelona. He was also a key member of the industry like his. don't you? He trains three hours four by 400 metre relay team a taken num. Although he wasn't prepared to get It must have been a very hard too personal, he did tell me she was French. an a day. six days a week He runs for four (lays and which dramatically beat the pumps weights for three days And it shows, I decision to give up a place at There is Americans for the world title. That athlete and that they'd met at the Olympic►. university in order to concentrate has so many female mean what a body! It's not that I lust after him. was his most memorable It's easy- to sec why he on a career where you're never admirers. He's tall, good-looking. has sun- because I don't, I just really admire him, This guv always the achievement. has achieved so much so young and he certainty guaranteed Wet:C.A. But what do athletes do when streaked blond locks and he looks good in front id -Well. yes and no. Once treat!) chance to they're injured? I mean. their got Into sport. the telt was history success depends on their physical It WON really the only deeision be a doctor fitness. Roger has been unlucky as could make There is always the far as injuries go He was bolted ill chance to be a doctor hilt only a but only a miss 198$ and 1989 because of a certain number of years to be an serious injury to his lout and he athlete.' certain had to endure an operation to have Would he ever go back to a metal screw put in. In 1992 he study ing once he retires? number of had another operation: this time on 'It's too late for that now A lot his hip. And in 1993 he was towed has happened since then. There arc years to be to miss vet another season when too many other things to do. I'd he was cruelly struck down with like to do something in the media an athlete glandular fever. It must he or sports development. Who extremely difficult for anyone being forced to knows'?" take three years out of their career, It was in 1991 when Roger really developed especially when that's all you're trained to do. How did his standing as one of the world's best 400 metre Roger cope? Did it ever cross his mind that he might never he able to compete again? "There is always the thought that you might never recover but you don't let it get the better of Ili COSI t -t,-o.)0411010,11‘810, OOP* you Having glandular fever was probably the cd/w rafts most worrying." Amsterdam 36 57 LA 130 239 Athens 59 118 Madrid 61 83 Glamour Australia 199 445 Mexico 177 289 I've always thought being an athlete is quite Bangkok 193 339 Moscow 144 214 glamorous because you get to see quite a hit of Boston 94 189 Nairobi 201 363 the world us 'pan of the job.' But Roger assured Budapest 79 145 New York 82 153 me that It isn't all sun. sea and sand He's always Cairo 117 2 19 Paris 36 59 hard at work. "You don't get to see that much of Casablanoe 106 199 Prague 75 139 the country you're in. You are literally there to Delhi 166 335 Rio 208 418 compete or train and that's it. But I plan to travel Dublin 30 60 San Francisco 130 24.0 around Australia a hit when I go over for the Olympics. And I'm off to California in a few Hong Kong 250 459 Tokyo 301 499 weeks to train." K. Lumpur 214 399 Toronto 128 219 I do feel sorry for our British athletes having to Around The World jet off to the sun because of the impracticalities of • r hi, ' :AZ ,, trams tiMbil our temperate climate for training. But I guess if I I 500$11C•Ote J Jakarta r 4.14traliti r •J.. 'Artsce NAPA/ VOA , ltnciaro *gosh t649 you're really successful money isn't a problem if •.roolnr.. ,nary-4 $61-10.-;- ,11* Swspirth " 2'14 you want to train in the hot climate when you r. arum C7.11 have queues of potential sponsors wanting to sign you up. Roger himself has three main sponsors - Reebok for the shoes and clothing. Mazda for the car and TSB for the money. Now as for drugs. British Athletics seems to he constantly poisoned with drug scandals. Jason IN YHA ADVENTURE SHOP 117-121 Vicar Lane L Livingston. Diane Modahl. Jefferson 'Shadow' King. TELEPHONE • BOOKINGS What does Roger think about all that? What sort of reputation has British Athletics gut? LEEDS "There's no question we've got a bad name. But we have to move on. I seriously believe that 0113 246 1155 most athletes aren't taking drugs."

LEEDS STUDENT Edda) 35t5lruiry 10. 1995 19 SPORT , :Bdtter plate than !lever- PO TS By Chris Clegg DESK 1.1.1IJ 4 TEESIDE 3 Ist XI Woman's Hockey ..,BUSA results in brief... DESPITE the absence of two players who had io withdraw with exam pressures, LU1J raised their game in LMU: BUSA LUU: BUSA the BUSA plate tournament to claim a gutsy 4-3 victory against Teeside. RESULTS RESULTS LUU set off at a determined pare with Sarah Freeman's cross after only two minutes sliding just past the post. But MEN'S VOLLEYBALL FOOTBALL. Teeside forced them to defend constantly in the first Crewe & Alsager 2 LMU I • A Warrington t LUU 2nd Xl 2 (ant • A quarter until Schofield seized a lung pass in the D and spectacular fifth set comeback saw penalty shoot nut was only one minute smashed LULLI's first goal past a confused Teeside defence. LMU through a tic whichproved away when substitute Paul Taylor Teeside responded well with a truly outstanding effort considerably tougher than might have scored a spectacular 25-yard goal to from their central attacker who ripped LUU's defence been expected after they comfortably send LULI through to the third round. apart and stoned in the equaliser. won the opening set. Crewe exploited Earlier. Warrington had taken the lead Five minutes before the break a short corner gave slack Leeds play to level at one-one and with a goal from a corner, but LUU Schofield the chance to restore LUU's advantage -4 two-two, and seemed to be heading for equalised when Damien Hughes Although Tema& levelled the score after 50 minutes, it victory when they established a 9-4 lead coolly slotted home from close range. took only 45 seconds for LUU to re-establish their lead in the decisive set But LMU recovered It was the culmination of a move of and give Schofield her hat nick. A further goal from to clinch the set 15-12 and move within rare quality on a muddy pitch which Challinor was enough to secure the game. one match of the BUSA finals. ensured the tie was always scrappy. Effective tackling by Harper & Gray. supported by the FOOTBALL: WU 4th XI I Crewe & Alsager 9, splendid keeping by Knighton maintained LUU's lead despite two Iate comeback goals from Teeside file Edge Hill I LMU 2nd Xl 0. NETBALL: minutes from rime. Chester 2_ LMU 3rd XI 1 1st team won 43- ID. 2nd team lost at Liverpool John LMU: PLATE Moores 24-34.

LUU hanggliding club organised a RESULTS LUU: PLATE flying competition in the Lake District last weekend which involved 35 OFF TO A FLIER RUGBY. RESULTS representatives from six universities. LMU 1st XV 2.2 Edge Hill 7 - Having In perfect flying weather. gliders WOMEN'S FOC)(BAL1 fallen behind to a converted penalty try with varying abilities and equipment early in the first half. Lkvill bounced LUU 19 Humberside (0 - In spite of pitted their wits against one another in hack with a try from full hack James fielding only nine players LUU swept a contest judged on quality of Goodwin and a penalty to lead 8-7 at past l-lumherstde with a barrage of performance. the break. A much improved second goals. Suzanne Redding, Vic Hynes, A glider from Hull was the most half performance saw Norman Sheldon Raclin! Lush, Sian Bailey and Denise impressive individual, although one break off the back of 4 ruck to dive over Ball all scored hat-tricks. Leeds representative, Tereze Weiss, for a second score, and two penalties FOOTBALL also caught the eve. Having almost completed the scoring. tripped on take oft she elegantly LUU 1st XI 5 Bradford & Ilkley I - dragged herself through a tnudbath on HOCKEY Leading two-nil at the break after an landing. Hull I Ls/1U 1st xi 0 The untidy first half, Lift! took control in The competition proved so popular disappointment of the first team's the second period and romped to a that it seems likely to become an narrow defeat at Hull in the Plate •aN comfortable win. Debutant Mike annual event, 11 was ideal preparatien compounded when the 2nd XI was Carter scored the pick of the Vat, for two contesta at Easter - the forted to forfeit their second round with a 35-yard chip Pant Mullin 121. Pete Garner and Barry Pilkitigtort also national student event in Swansea and home tic with Liverpool because of scored, the Penine hanggliding centre's trip to their inability to raise a side the French Alps.

TOTAL cooluALL Total Football - players scores. Is your team sinking like Leicester, or climbing like Spurs?

41 SC, •'‘110_12All 1 11 n 15 2111 BoWILY CPI_ 17 2 272 RYAN 105345 SHE a -I 340 MATHIE NEW 0 9 349 pEKTHEE QPR ?I 6 31-11 KLINSMANN 'rear 5 5? 511 SPAMAN ARS 2 HI 'AU Ile IPS WHA 4 t.3 Oh2 BARTRAM ARS 11 -2 069 Y ALLOP LES -1 11 4/ PALMER LEI 3 0 208 DARBY COY 1-16 273 WADDLE SHE 6 7 341 ROMS NOR h III 134-1ROIST 9 339 COTTEE 3 43 pAntcLouL74 LEE CP 0 34.9 WILLIAMS COY -1 -1 27411E TISSIER SOT 3 31 arz ellt0ei. NOR 3 It 331 BRIGHT -SHE 9 26 360 L CHAPMAN wen 0 4 eW BOSNICH AST 1 7 070 KELLY LEE 12 9113A 0 n (101 SPINK AST • 10 071 DrJR100 LEE 3 5 44 HI1-1- LEI 2 .3 210 FLYNN COY I -4 275 MADDISON SOT 43 a 34.1 SHERON NOR 0 IA 11: WATSON SHE 0 7 361 MORLEY 005 N,OSOIRS BLA 29 o71 WORTHINGTON LEE 3 1: 43 WILLIS LEI 3 -4 211 BOLAND C07: -I -R 274 MAGILTON SOT 0 2 344 CDLEYMORE NOP 10 61 333 BANGER SOT 0 6 002 cAsTLEcHNE WIM 0 3 ▪ 217 COOK COY -1 -3 117 wonereciroN &err o -I 345 LEE NOP 0 0 354 DOWIE SOT 419 363 BLISSETT Ram n I 4306 MIMES BLA 2 .2 1773 GRAYSON LEI 2 34 46 MOHAN LEJ -I -14 364 }011 DSWORTI1 VIM ❑ 15 rllrr Ctir 2 34 07-1 MILLS rat n 0 47 RtFDDOCK L1V 0 27 211 LIMPAR EVE 13 a 271 D0721611. TOT 0 3 344 ROSARIO NOP 0 0 355 MASKELL SOT 0 0 IG3ARLNE -I 347 •ERDiNAPID QPR A 56 336 BARMRY TOT 5 411 000 tintatcoca: CHE IFT5 W1fITLOw 113 0-IS 40 BABB LW 0 8 214 STUART EVE 4 3 279 11A7.ARD TOT 0 009 MARTYN CPL 3 2; 076 1ONFS ti 49 SC'ALES 1Jv 0 17 213 EEBRI3LL EVE 1 5 V30 HOWELLS TOT 2 4 248 GAL LEN QPR 2 73 157 SHFAINOH AM ToT 2 47 nip GLASS c21, 0 ; 077 BJCIRNBYE LIV 37 50 60001. I IV 0 3 216 AINSWORTH EVE 1 I 281 ANDERTON TOT 11 011 OGROZOVIC COY 078 HILL mac U -4 51 COALE MAC-1 11 217 SAMWAYS EVE (I A CASKET TOT 0 Midland Hank • OOOLD COY o 0 079 BRILIIITwELL MAC- I : 52 1) BRIGIfTWELL MAC - 1 .3 210 SLATER IPS 0 1 763 DIUMETRESKV TOT 13 present: The Total Football League Top 20 U13 SOUTHALL EVE 9 3 060 PHELAN MAC 0 33 VONK MAC-1 219 MILTON IPS I) 4 34 HUTCHINSON WHA I KEARTON EVE ❑ 3 oat IRWIN MAU 5 35 34 BRUCE 614.11 3 25 220 MASON IPS 4 5 183 ALLEN WHA 1115 FORREST IPS •I IS PPARKM MAD 0 0 35 PALLIST• MAU 3 37 221 WILLIAMS EPS -I.13 286 BISHOP WHA- I Name cam Pis 016 BAKER IPS 0 U 0/33 MAY MAU 3 51 56 et..sturr New 0 14 222 CXNCHEV WS 0 -3 2117 BUTLER MLA 0 1117 LUKIC LEE 1 11 084 VENISON NEW It it 57 PEACOCK NEW 0 13 223 STRACHAN LEE 0 -1 HOLMES WI1A-1 JONATHAN TOBIAS POO AND PANTS 414 010 BELLY LEE a 0 iso BERESPORD NEW 0 12 5118trITERWOBITINOR -1 I 224 SPEED LEE 0 2 289 MONCUR WHA a 019 WARD tat 006 EELI0T NEV -2 7 S FOLSTON NOR -2 225 MCALLISTER LER 0 6 29a V ZONES WIM 0 1150 POCILE LEI 2 -10 Oil BOWE74 NOR -I 11 eo NEWSOME NOR -2 12 224 D WIETE LEE 0 2 291 FEAR WIT4 JI CA ROLYN FINLEY BODINGTON BEAUTIES 413 020 0153455 LW 0 14 41:48anseattouse NOR L .1 61 COOPER NOP 3 14 227 WHELAN tEl 0 20 292 GAYLE WIN 1 022 sTEN5GAARD UV 0 0 O89 BRADSHAW NOR • 1 7 62 CHETTLE NOP 1 6 =1 SI BLAKE LET 0 2 aat pant' RIM -1 DOUG YARKER VIVA BUNGALOW 410 023 COTON MAC -1 5 on PEARCE NOP n 24 63 YATES GPR 0 1 229 AGNEW LEI II -7 204 EARLE PAM -I I 024 3311351.P MAC 0 6 011 LYTTLE NOP 3 10 64 MCDONALD QPR 3 -6 230 THOMPSON LEI -1 -11 ANDREW LEE LEE LEADS LEE'S LADS 405 023 SCHMLICHEL MAU 1 21 092 LAWS NOP o 0 63 PEARCE SHE 3 17 231 DRAPER LPJ I .2 mintr-voRsrorans 026 mesa MAU 0 a 093 BARDSLEY 66 WALKER SHE. S 13 212 PHILPOT LEL -1 2 ROBERT CAREY HOOKNULL KNOTS 400 ay swami NEW 0 to 11W WILSON QPRQ7PR -4 trT MON1(011 SOT 0 5 233 ORMONDROYD LEI o 4 300 !WRIGHT ARS a 36 au HOOPER NEW•2 ATHI00TON SHE 3 24 60 HALL Sat -1 -1 214 REDKNAPP IJV 13 01 301 K CAMPBELL. ARS 0 17 391 029 GUNN NOR b11 096 PETRESCV SHE 3 10 69 CA1-DERWOOD TOT 0 141 233 MCMANAMAN LIV 0 35 302 A 551111 ARS 0 18 JOHN SHEA RLOCK 030 HOWIE NOR U 097 NOLAN SHE 3 :4 70 NETHERCIYIT TOT 0 -1 236 MOIRY IJV 0 10 303 FASILANU key 0 II AST 40 A OLIVER SYKES WELSH WIZARDS 391 OS1 CROSSLEY NOF 1 11 K129T45 SOT -1 5 71 POPKSCU TOT 0 237 BARNES IJV 0 29 304 ATKINSON 032 T WRIGHT MOP 0 0 0944 CHARLTON SOT •1 -7 T2 POTTS WHA 1 8 218 THOMAS Liv 0 0 305 SAUNDERS AST 3 0 011 ROBERTS QPR 3 0 14311 BENALI SOT 1 0 73 MARTIN WHA 1 11 234 CL.01101-1 IJV 0 43 306 GALEACHER BLA 0 0 EMMA WARNE JET SET WILLIES 386 014 DYKSTRA QPR o 1 lal S. CAMPBELL TOT' 0 2 74 FITZGERALD WIM 0 -7 2.40 BEAGRIE MAC 0 III 301 SHTFON BIA I 71 015 PRESSMAN SHE 3 la 102 EDINBURGH TOT 0 -11 75 NKr-ALLISTER VIM 0 0 241 MCMAHON MAC 0 4 360 SHEARER BLA II eo IAN COVENTRY A FEW GOOD MEN 385 036 WOODS SHE 3 6 lily KERSIAU TOT 11-16 242 SUMMERBEE MAC 0 9 104 FL1RLONCi cirE o 21 037 MOBRIAAR SOT i 194 BRI=SKER WHA 40 11 MIDEIELDEILS 243 FIITCROFT MAC 3 23 -ma STEIN CHE 4 I STEPHEN JEPSON COUNTY CONNECTION 381 110 pp 0W1AND MIA 0 5 244 GIGGS MAU 0 4 311 SPENCER CHE 4 35 • BF.ASAP.T SOT 0 -I ❑ 025 THOFtSIVE13T TOT it 0 115 EL KINS WIM 2 -8 186 P DA'5'IS ARS 1 4 245 KaNctirtsias MAU 38 312 ARMSTRONG CM. 1 14 REAL SOCIEMUM 381 040 WALICIBt. TUT 0 -2 107 BARTON WIM 2 -8 181 JENSEN ARS -1 0 246 MCCLAIR MAU a 17 313 DYER L71- 0 IAN HUTCHINSON 1341 NEU:JUG WIIA-1 6 11.08 51510LE w0.1 40 4 152 SCHWARZ ARS 0 ILl 247 INC E MAL' 0 1 114 PREECE ri 31) 381 042 SUER wHA 0 0 183 PARLOUR ARS 0 2 :as SHARPE MAU 0 it 313 W593 •R cop 12 ANDREW JACKSON JACKSON VILLA 043 SOARS WIM 2 41 A:ENTRE BACKS 184 MERSON ARS: -2 249 KEANE MAI: 0 4 316 NDLOV COV 2 044 &ULLMAN Wim 103 IIIIIIER ARS 0 0 na SELLARS NEW I 14 317 D DUBUN Coy 3 all MATE INNES WE'RE BORO WE'RE BARMY 380 20 BOULD AID. ❑ 5 1843 YORKE AST a -3 131 LEE NEW -I n 318 IDDHOUT FIVE 4 44 BACKS RI ADAMS ARS 2 14 187 PARKER AST 0 I 252 HOTTINGER NEW-1 2 319 ANIOKACHI EVE 0 6 SHERWOOD FOREST 380 111.1. EVE 0 n ELICIA MARRIOTT 342 KEOWN AILS 0 10 186 RICHARDSON AST 0 .5 253 WATSON NEW-1 25 320 AELLNG 050 DIXON I MO2RAlli MT 3 -3 185 TOWNSEND AST 0 -6 234 PDX NEW 7 N3 321 111WOMYA IPS 0 in 380 ARS -2. us dr 3 STUART HUNTER INTER SHEEP 031 WINTERBURN ARS -2 3 24 EILIOCLIt MT 0 16 140 HoluAlloN _AST 0 -6 255 MEGSON NOR .1 rd MARSHALL 052 BARRETT AST 11 1 25 TEALS MT a V 391 SLATER BLA 0 15.1 256 CROOK NOR 7 NIASINI5A LEM a 33 323 WALLACE LEE ft 19 JENNY HOPKINS JENNY'S GIANTS 379 (X13 STAUNTON AST 3 12 25, HENDRY BLA 2 24 191 SHERWOOD BLA 1 24 :Si GOSS NOR - -2 054 KING 27 GALE BLA 1) 16 153 RATTY BLA a 0 238 ULLATIIGELNE NOR - -I 326 DIANE LEE 4124 AST 3 10 1.10 ❑ 15 EMMA POYNER ELITE UNITED 379 0351.E SAUK BLA 0 19 123101IN5EN CHE • 2 8 194 WILCOX BLA -2 25 239 ROY NOP 27 327 JOACHIM 036 BERG BLA • 2 27 29 NOODLE 511E 9 •1 195 RTPLEY BLA • 2 II 260 STONE NOE I II 328 S WALSH 1E1 U I 378 AV SINCLAIR CHE 2 11 30 JOELIBIERG CHI: 11 12 196 BURLEY CHB -2 2. 261 PHILLIPS NOP 10 329 SPEEDIE LEI n 0 JAMES TAN WARRIORS ❑ 6 330 RUSH 1.1V II 42 058 CLARKE 4-7E 2 31 YOUNG CT1. n -1 197 NEWTON CHF. •1 242 GEMNTILI. NOE 039 SENTO CHE .2 5 3' COLEMAN CPI. 1 27 198 WISE cm -2 9 261 WOAN NOE 11 TH FOWLER 1.1V 3 114 WIGFIELDS TOWEL 377 MAC MATT SLATER 066 GORDON CPL 6 30 33 PATTERSON („71. 3 6 199 PEACOCK CHI • 2 8 244 BARKER (FR 3 3 33: P WALSH 137 QPR 2 5 333 ROSIER MAC 1 32 oat SHAW CPL 3 23 34 BMW MY 0 6 NO SPACILMAN CHE -2 -6 265 INIPPY JAMIE WINTER BATT IS GOOD 375 062 BORROWS COV -2 35 RENNIE COv i -8 201 ROCASTLE CHE 0 1 266 HOLLOWAY Q1411 2 0 334 N QUINN MAC 0 4 335 coorroisa MAU to 48 063 9 MORGANCOY 2 I ABLET EVE 0 12 202 WILKINS CPI A .5 267 SIMMAJIL QPR 12 DAVID FREESTONE BUDGIE BUSTERS 375 EVE 0 14 1132 SOUTHGATE CPL 4 9 20 SINTON PM 12 .9 336 HUGHES MALI U 59 054 BURROWS EVE 2 0 3? WATSON NEW 7 19 065 IACKSCIN EVE 0 6 38 WARE IPS 1 -4 204 &MAK° CPL 1 to 269 TAYLOR DIE 2 7 33/ KITSON 375 1166 11B4CHCIIEVE EVE 0 6 39 UNIGHAN IPS 0 -9 X5 ROD GER CPL 0 -6 roiSitlanDAN SHE 0 -4 338 BEARDSLEY HEW 0 25 TOFFFLER FULLER LETISSVILLE 067 STOCKWELL IPS 0 -4 40 YOUDS IPS 0 -7 1152 PITCHER CP1. 1 -6 211 BART-9i1111AMSSHE 5 6 339 COLE NEW 1 52 Hits lat,sA v loss Country races at hen} Boyle and Helm Welts. Manchester saw an excellent Exams. aims and injury- left only perfirmanix by LUll's women_ Led by three of the top ten male runners LIED ' LADIES available, and tendered a rcpn of their Lesley Leavesley (12th) and captain Laura Woffenden 1131 Leeds finished Northents victory impatuble. However, third behind powerful Lnughborough Chris Maxwell. Mark Colpus and Mask CLINCH and Oxford teams They showed Phillipson all finished well up a quality strength in depth with Trish Barton field. They were hacked up by Ion 18) and Jenny Harrison Fla t helping Greenwell, Graham Evans. skipper February 10, 1995 hold off Birmingham and Cambridge. Duncan Welberm, Robert Smith and SPORT BRONZE Also competing were Sian Roberts, Gummier Grew.d to finish respectably. n BOGGED DOWN

fly Prigr iCtffrl TASC ILUI II 3rd XI Raab!. THE LULl's first defeat oil the season could not have come at a worse time. This second round BUSA game was effectively FINAL WHISTLE ruined by a quagmire cd a pitch and by some highly dubious AS the curtain falls on what. for England. has refereeing decisions. been a dismal and humiliating tour cif Australia. The nature of the pitch meant that the game was forward we are left to reflect an the sorry stale of English orientated and this suited Trinity & All Saints Colleges cricket and the prospect of a humbling at the TASC) much heavier pack. hands of the visiting West Indies this summer. TASC opened the sconng with a penalty after 20 minutes England's hopes of capturing the Ashes for the but Leeds replied immediately with a try from centre Batty. lirst time since 1986 were dented by the Two penalties from fly-half Faulkener meant that at half time misfortune which stalked them telentlessly round Ltru were leading I 1-3. Australia. However, the. crippling injury list The second half was ruined by the referee's liberal which ruled out such key figures as Steuart. interpretation of the offside lass in favour of TASC and his Gough and Hick. and the rain which saved tendency to penalise Leeds for trivial offences. Australia from defeat in the Third Test cannot Having squandered two penalty opportunities TASCs mask the inadequacies of the touring party pressure told as they scored two tries in the final 20 minutes The inconsistency of Atherton's side - leaving Leeds to commiserate not only losing their 100 per unbeatable one week. unspeakable the next record but also their place in the BUSA competition. cent leaves this country in danger of slipping into A disappointed Faulkener commented: "The combination cricket's crawler lane. Zimbabwe's victors over of the pitch and the general ineptitude of the referee was Pakistan last week should sent as a warning to partly responsible for our defeat, but you have to expect that England that they can no longer take for granted away from home." their place among the elite. There is no instant remedy to the problems. The fact that England have won only two of the last 23 Ashes Tests indicates a deep-rooted problem, the solution to which lies in a nutival ...BUSA RESULT... BUSA RESULT... BUSA RESULT... BUSA RESULT... overhaul of ow flawed domestic gams. The establishment of an Australian-style cricket academy in essential. Although a centre ofescellence cannot transfomi had cricketers into world heaters, it could hone the talents of our most promusing youngsters and perhaps elevate starlets into world class performers English cricketers are not inherently worse than Australia's: they are simply being denied the oppoiturtity to fulfil then potential There is an urgent need to coach out faults Up Hill struggle among the leading cricketers, and former players must assume a prominent role in this task, As well as Bobby Simpson, who is in charge of the Test side, Australia boast Greg Chappell. Rod Marsh and Dumis Lillec among the former stars who arc helping to smooth the edges of their rough diamonds. David Gower and Graham Gooch are two former players who might be involved 111 a similar structure here. The pitiful amount of cricket played in state ends in defeat schools, coupled with the appalling standard of A BATTLING coaching. perhaps explains why the production line of England's world class players seems to he display on a LMU CRASH ;zriiiiline to a halt. National Lottery money should mudbath of a pitch be poured into schools cricket. and artificial could not save LMU pitches can overcome any handicap which the from a narrow IN ROUND TWO weather has handed England in relation to second Australia and West Indies. round EDGE HILL t LM(' 0 troubled the visitors on the The present selection system for the Test BUSA defeat they 2nd XI Football counterattack- squad must also be reviewed. At present. Ray They held out to secure a scarcely deserved. out were wasted by some lllingworth, the chairman of selectors, has a victory which was harsh on Leekt!, tor.:eil to play profligate finishing. Dave vnmtual cartel in selection, with Brian Bolus and LMU after their valiant efforts the first ten minutes of !hi% Murphy's corners consistently Fred Titrnus espousing the same outdated ideas on a pitch which was hardly crucial encounter with only nine wreaked havoc in the Edge Hill as him. Atherton has therefore been left isolated conducive to their passing style men after Manchester-based defence as the hosts came under and overruled. lacking the support of sonietaidy • LMU's 1st X1 enjoyed players. Dudley Cnirashave and siege who is involved in the modern game to more luck in their home Mark Vincent got lost on their But I_MU were hit by appreciate and communicate its characteristics. a encounter with York Ripon St way to the ground. sucker punch after a swift Edge Little wonder he has insisted on vowed to pick John in the BUSA plate Hill break on the hour. young players and stick by them. Menacing competition for teams already Goalkeeper Mark Smith All is not doom and gloom. The form of knocked out of the was during this opening appeared to have dealt with a Graeme Hick and the 4:confirmation that Darren It championship proper. winning spell that LMU looked at their comer but dropped the ball as Gough is an all-rounder of genuine quality are 3- 1 menacing best, and the arrival he landed on the ground and an pluses, So too was Devon Malcolm's hostile They took a fifth minute lead of the missing pair coincided Edge Hill forward took full howling in Adelaide, and the sound performances through a Robbie Pearson lob with the deterioration of the advantage of his emir, poking of Thorpe. Crawley and Ramprakash. The and increased their advantage fixture into an unattractive in the winning goal from four selectors must show faith in this trio, short term 20 minutes into the second half midfield battle. yards out. failure be accepted for the sake of long term when Sean Constable added the Neither side could stamp suds. finishing touch to a quickly their authority on the game, and 1)esperate England A's tour of India has also seen the taken free kick. chances were few and far emergence of batsman Jason Galian and bowler Leeds responded with a York reduced the deficit between in a dull first half. Glen Chapel. and both are likely to figure in desperate effort to haul with at penalty awarded while Leeds resumed after the Atherton's plans. themselves back into the tie, Andy Pheby writhed in agony break with more purpose and If the structure of the game is sensibly altered suranung forward in numbers. with a broken nese but Pearson poise. but the scoring there is no reason why Australia's stranglehold on But Edge Hill massed their men wrapped things up with five opportunities which they carved the Ashes cannot be broken. behind the ball and continually minutes remaining. Jon Brodkin

Susan BY 'ECK! BOGOTA Leybourne Fed up with having to wait until the weekend for a decent night out? Finding the cash flow is really beginning to bite? Then fear no more, as a group of Leeds students are bringing a classic club night to Leeds during the middle of the week., at BOOM! Your Tarot Forecast a price that even the most hard-up of us can afford. Columbia opens at The Warehouse on Saunderson (Inner City), Joey Negro and Billy for the week ahead Wednesday 15 February and promises to Nasty are all in the pipeline. On the door will be gorgeous University Of Leeds student Sarah change the repetitive and stale mid-week music ARIES scene. As organiser Ste Butchart stated; "We Elms (pictured right), a regular dancer at Up New ventures are well starred this week as you start want weekend-name DJ's on a mid-week Yer Ronson. to past plans into motion_ Relationships are back The students certainly intend to fill the gap ut night." With Ian Ossia (Renaissance) and in focus, it's the ideal time to start a new romance, mid-week market, as co-organiser Sam Gordon Kaye (Joy for Life) at the opening night in the especially with someone with similar interests. as well as Stu Hacket (Bliss) and Hudspanski Colby stated: "We want more of a full-blown (Poland), Ste and the rest of the group have party than a circus." on February 15 and will next TAURUS believe that they have fulfilled their promise. Columbia opens For Taureans thinking of moving home, or putting hit Leeds on March 15. It will then become a Another of the organisers, Tim Macready, went down new roots, this is an ideal time for success. fortnightly event. Drinks promos include further by saying: "We want to start something come true on the cards for you, as all Carling at the bargain price of Cl a bottle, and There's a wish differemt. On our opening night we have got you touch seems full of opportunity. This week is a Castaway just £1.20. the kind of DJs that you would expect at a good time to consider financial matters. weekend club. s not been easy, but we are Columbia should be a club that Valderrama would be proud of. committed to keeping that kind of quality GEMINI going every time." The negativity that you have been feeling over recent The group have also been in touch with the PHIL BAKER weeks seems to be clearing now, and you're starting Renaissance agents, Mark and Jeff. and the to feel in charge again. Making plans for the future is likes of Kevin well highlighted, especially over academic prusuits.

CANCER Oh dear, what next? The whole of your life seems CHATTER upturned over relationship matters. Your love life is going full steam ahead, but can your friends stand you being in such a jolly state for much longer? Important decisions are being made over the next fee weeks - don't rush over thine. BOX LEO !ravel will be important this week, as it may be After the sarcastic success of Alan Partridge in Knowing Me, Knowing You, B' necessary to attend interviews in an unfamiliar area. are presenting us with yet another comic character-cunt-chat show host, in the There's rots of competition about, so be careful to make the right impression with an influential woman. shape of Mrs Merton. In The Mrs Merton Show (Tonight, 81302, 11.15pm), comidienne Caroline Hook (wife of New Order's Peter, showbiz trivia fans) plays There's a general feeling of tiredness, and overdoing the old lady in the floral frock and the librarian's glasses, interviewing a range of things could lead to mistakes. real life famous people (unlike the Alan Partridge crew), from Kris Akabussi to VIRGO Debbie "yes, Paul" McGee. Money and success will be all around you this week, I lowever, Mrs Merton, being a comedy creation and not a real little old lady, you will be feeling rather comfortable with your lot, doesn't limit her questions to "that's a nice hat, dear" and "000h, what lovely and perhaps quite generous. Don't overspend, as you weather we're having" - she's actually quite insulting to her guests. But then, that's like the nice things in life, this may lead to a shopping the kind of behaviour we've come to expect from old people these days, isn't it? spree of totally useless items. When was the last time your Granny had a nice word to say about your latest hairstyle? LIBRA Questions from the audience make The Mrs Merton Shine much more than just a This week will be a very socially active one, you are vehicle for a particular comic routine, as responses are genuine ad-libs, rather than coming out of your shell so much that you may have heavily scripted "gags". There will be six shows in the series, and guests coming up to choose between two invitations or more. Money include Cynthia Payne and Mary Whitehouse. Now that should be an interestiong will be a bit tight, but that won't make a big difference confrontation - perhaps they'll to any of your plans this week. compare wardrobes...... Fri 3 Sat 4 Sun 5 Thur 9 Maur Boo MU SCORPIO Team work is very important this week - if you pull together with others, the work will be done in half the 8-8.1 Ma Martial tigars Jar's )rest tamMOM time. Health matters are very important - don't get ETV'S MOST GRATUITOUS ATTEMPT ME L shot:Ira im area too stressed out as this can lead to health worries. dollar! Racks of Wu: Greograce 8-1 Ow T ran OMR SAGITTARIUS TO CASH IN ON VALENTINE'S DAY Oran RA dirt Emotional turmoil, as you will be feeling a big burden stem Valentine's Day Special: A Wild Romance (9.30pm, BBC1) on you this week for no real reason. Temporary 1 0-12PI ape Joss setbacks will make you imagine that youhave failed Thi's rather desperate schedule-filler provides us, apparently Ward= in some way. Remember, this is all anillusion, and with a look at love and romance in the animal kingdom. So, success is waiting within a few weeks. animals shagging then. Nice one. I personally am looking it-8m Jaw's Fog NM elm torward to the Mongolian flat-footed tree-frog and its chosen partner haulm CAPRICORN at it'", or maybe even two warthogs in sexual ecstasy. Possibly we You're not thinking properly this week, as much might even get a look at nextdoor's cat terrorising the local energy will be spent on planning for the summer. population of female rnoggies. 2-41a Mr 1 1044 Den IN Anyone thinking of travel, especially towards water Look, you can see more exciting sex in Ritzy's on a Monday night or over it, will have a good time. By nature you are - the sight of the lesser-spotted civil engineer pursuing what we in pessimistic, and expect the worst. this week you will Pal Prier II Mr. i fa the field of biology call Skinniws Wettchus has got to be more fun than • be making plans which cannot fail. this. Oh, get a life, get a date, whatever - but avoid this at all costs. MOM ar dop Ar Dm Mimi= Cal llowy h AQUARIUS AIN Mad dream 107.8 fm You don't seem to have any rules over relationships over the next few weeks. Be careful, as this could lead to problems. Your flirtatious nature might be adies and gentlemen, I'm afraid I be the weekly humiliation forced upon Nick percieved as something more serious, and could cause have a confession to make. I am an "beardie" Powell - for example, sending the upsets in existing friendships. Laddict. Yes, despite previous poor lamb out onto the A65 in the middle of comments I may have made in this the recent snows. PISCES column criticising the programme, No, 1 think I've worked out the cause of Money matters are still running high, and success is during the last few weeks1 have become my addiction. It's the Calendar thecae tune, assured. You will be startng a new phase in your life addicted to Calendar. Quite why, which, although only lasting thirty seconds, soon, but someone will be passing a judgement on however, I really can't say. Perhaps it's ranks almost as hi as the ditty that you and your activities Take no notice as there are a the daily excitement created by watching intnidures Lire And rig in the "getnn&-on- few people showing petty jealousy towards you this Richard Whiteley struggle with his introduced fails to appear on our vour-niTively .cklv-but-stavin week. autocue (Why, Richard? You're perfectly screens, and they're feirced to smile back-of-your- -all-dav" stakes. Once I've alright on Countdown, which doesn't engagingly at us for an extra twenty beard it, I just can't stop hu mming the bloody appear to have a script - why should this seconds. It might be the supressed Susan Leybourne is the Pagan Chaplain at The be any different?). giggles from the newsreaders when So that's it - sad though it may be, I am University of Leeds, attached to its Occult society Alternatively, it could be the they're introduced as being someone hooked on Richard, Krista and their mates. KABAL. She can be contacted at her office at 77 bemusement on the faces of the completely different. (As Emily Baker Still, it knocks spots off Look North..,... Vicar Lane, Leeds LSI 6QA (0113) 242 3531 presenters when the report they've just demonstrated last week when she was introduced as Gaynor Barnes), It could even 0

g film IBBC1 friday 10 pick of the day MGM Vicar Lane off Hamilton's Cottage Gardens (0113.245 2665) 5.40 Spirit Of Islam: 6.00 Business Ge Rugrats 6.00 GMTV, 9.25 Chain Letters. 9.55 Star Trek: Generations 1230pm Breakfast 7.00 News; 9.05 Kilroy; 10.00 (8.30pm, BBC2) (4.10pm, BBC1) News: Weather, 10.00 The Time_ The 3.05pm 5.40prn 8 15pm News; 10.05 Good Morning With Anne No doubt Mr Hamilton will be Tommy, Chuckie, Angelica et at beat Place... 10.35 This Morning; 12.20 News: Interview With The Vampire 1.30pm And Nick; 12.00 News Regional Newss, mulching an' a-mollocking and all other kids programming pants Weather. 12.55 Coronation Street 5.30prn 8.10pm Weather: 12.05 Pebble Mill: 12.55 News showin' us his shrubbery. down. Great stuff of the animated 1.25 Home and Away. Frankie is Compulsive viewing. variety. The Specialist 1pm 5 50pm 8.201>m 1.30 Neighbours. Doug and Lou are shocked to learn why Angel left. Trapped In Paradise 3.15pm convinced that the taste of their new 1.55 A Country Practice. Anna Lacey Odeon - The Windrow has to treat Ruby the pig. home brew will be enough to 10113-243 6230) 2.20 Murder, She Wrote Nauseating, I overcome council objections to Leon 1.50pm 5-204m 8.20Pm wrote, Shallow Grave 1.50pm 4.0epre production on the premises . , 3.10 Help Yourself I hope teis is nothing 1.50 Timekeepers IBBC2 Age liCh4 6.20pm 8 40pm 4 to (to with Rosie and Jim. &argots 1 45pm 5.10prei 8.10pm 2.15 Holiday I 3.15 5 Minutes The Road to Werkele 1,40pm 5-250e1 2.45 The Flying Doctors With wings. 6,40 Open University; 8.00 News; 8.15 6.35 Sandokan: 7.00 The Sig Breakfast: 3.20 News 8.15pm 3.30 Daffy Duck Double Bill The History Man; 8.20 Bartholomew, 8.50 9.00 You Bet Your Life; 9.30 Schools: 3.30 Children's ITV: Rosie And Jim Hyde Park Cinema 3.45 Bilsa A Week To Remember, 9.00 Schools; 12.00 Profiles of Nature; 12.30 Sesame 3.45 Cartoon Brudenell Road, LS8 4.00 4.00 Jackanory 2.00 Johnson And Friends; 2.10 Open Street: 1.30 Magic Roundabout, Wombles, Zzzap (0113-275 2046) 4.10 Rugrats Paddington and Noggin the Nog. 1.55 4.15 Tiny Toon Adventures Speed 6.30prn View; 2.15 Sport On Friday; 3.50 News; Pete Smith Specialties; Joe McDoakes 4A0 Tales From The Crypikeeper Even Cowgirls Get The Blues 4.25 The Borrowers 4.00 Today's The Day; 4,30 Snooker 9Pre 2.20 FILM: Father Brown (1954). 5.10 Home And Away Bill d Ted douhle bit t ipin 4.55 Newsround Extra 6.00 Captain Scarlet And The 5.40 News: Weather Comedy thriller starring Alec Cottage Road Cinema 5.05 Grange Hill. Desperate for money, Mysterons. Could there be an end 5.55 Calendar News: Weather Guiness as G. K. Chesteron's Cottage Road, Fer Headingley Gordon tries to persuade Anna to to the war of nerves between the 6.30 Superchamps famous priest and amateur (0113-275 1608) raid her mothers purse. Mysterons and the spectrum? 7.00 Bruce Forsyth's Play Your Cards Interview We The Vampire detective Father Brown. 5.35 Neighbours 6.25 Randall And Hopklrk (Deceased) Right. Brucie is your host for the TV Lounge Cinema 6.00 News: Weather 4.00 Travelog card game in which couples test 7.15 The 0-Zone. Featuring American 4.30 Countdown Who wants Carol North Lane. Headtngley 6.30 Regional News Magazines their knowledge of public opinion in 10113-275 1606) all-girl group Jade. Vorderman to lake five from the 7.00 Wipeout. There are no magic order to get those oh-so-useful SheRow Greve 7,30 Operavox. New series combining bottom row in a low cut dress? answers to Paul Daniels' quiz show Brucie Bonuses. drama, comedy and music as the 5.00 Cutting Edge where contestants have the chance 7.30 Coronation Street. Aft gets himself magic of animation brings popular 6.00 Blossom In my opinionation the in a knot trying to please all of the thecit re of winning a dream holiday prize. operas to screen. sun ain't gonna surely shine Not people all ot the time - which is 7.30 Tomorrow's World. Carol 8.00 Countrywomen. Katy Cropper was when this is on it's not. never an easy thing to do. West Yorkshire Playhouse Vorderman discovers how a new 6.30 Movlewatch 8.00 The Bill. An old friend of Conway's Quarry Hill Mount, Leeds determined to beat male space telescope is proving a bonus 7.00 Channel 4 News; Weather refuses to compromise his private (0113-244 21111 competition and become one of for black holes In teeth. Howard 7.50 You Don't Know Me But.. I life and co-operate with the police The Winter Gueer by Sharman Britain's top sheepdog handlers. Stabletord heads for Israel to solve at Ritzy's on Monday after being mugged by a prostitute. Me4Deriald, directed by Aran Richman snagged you the mystery of an ancient site. She talks about her brilliant career Can Conway persuade him to do 7.45pm night. to sheep dog !nailing. otherwise? Oarling On by Alan Bennett, with 8.00 Only Fools and Horses. Rodney's 8.00 The 3,000 Mlle Garden, Leslie 8.30 Geoff Hamilton's Cottage Timothy West. directed by Prunete new-found - and unexpected - Land cooks an enormous salmon in 8.30 The Upper Hand. Charlie drives through the night in order to stop Scales 7.30pm power as Chairman of the Dockside Gardens. Modem techniques of a bath tub and invites friends round his Civic Theatre Estate Tenants Association comes controlling pests while retaining the for a 4th of July party. Roger Philips daughter's betrothal. With Joe McGann. Diane Weston and Honor Cookndge Street, Leeds to no good. With David Jason and Charms of traditional flowers comes joins the residents of the square for Blackman, Tho importance of Bang Earnest try under consideration. And Geoff a midsummer barbecue and meets Nicholas Lyncitturel. 9.00 Dr Finlay. Dr Finlay's mother Oscar Wilde 7.30ran 8.30 Health and Efficiency. There are visits the Sussex home Of William a jogger who believes that Tickets £5 5014.501£3.50 gardening is politically incorrect. comes to stay and reveals a family financial as well as medical crises Robinson - now a flourishing story which nobody at Arden House Grand Theatre 8.30 Brookside. Bev is big news on the when a computer malfunction country hotel_ has ever guessed. New Beggate, Leeds Close, but that's not really good results in a lack of funds and Diana 9.00 Bottom. Last episode of the cult 10.00 News: Weather Great Expect/teens - the musical news for Ron. Emma seems to be Ewerts announces that General and comedy series and still no sign of 10.40 Music And Movies Starring Darren Day softening her attitude towards Surgical B must be shut down until 11.10 The Hidden Room 7 30pm Tickets £6.50-2250 Rik Mayall in the buff. That's what Barry, and there's a lock-out for the April. the BBC needs these days. that's 11.40 FILM: Bonnie And Clyde (1967). Banks. For Mandy. Sinbad and ('inc.i ■1's ancient. two, it's got 9.00 News: Regional News: Weather what Public Service Broadcasting is Beth it's a day of decisions and clubs 9.30 Dangerrield. Police surgeon Paul Warren Beatty in it, three, how may all about. The lads seize a few revelations. times has it been on? This is the Dangerfield (Nigel Le Valliant) minutes of television fame In the 9.00 Ellen. Someone has written a note bullet-laid interpretation ot the US promises to keep a deadly secret to The Pleasure Rooms midst of a notous carnival. Followed criticising Ellen's teaching style in dream gone heroically sour, as a Lower Memo Street, Leeds protect a friend - but only for 24 by Two's Comedy the reading group pair of gun-toting robbers hightail it Up Yor Ronson hours. Meanwhile his love file 9.30 The Hlgh Life. The Air Scotia crew 9.30 Rising Damp. Sounds like St. across Depression-era America in search of fresh banks, grocery Bar Basks hangs in the balance when Kate are in for a bumpy landing when Mark's to me, but we get Carl Potter instead of Rigsby stores and gas stations to rob. Lower Memon Street. Leeds (Kim Vithana) tells him she's been Captain Duff is too busy tying his 10.00 Roseanne. It's a typical rip-roaring Picking a couple of extra members Up Yer Ronson Pre Club Free Entry offered a job in Bnstol. shoelaces, and forgets about the Leeds University Union 10.20 FILM: A Cry In The Dark (1988). day on Thanksgiving, but Roseanne to provide them with a fast getaway, controls. Even Alan Cuming can't the ambitious couple's criminal Harvey Milk Bar Starring Meryl Street) and Sam and Dan are anxiously wailing to save this airliner from bombing. blitzkrieg continues until murder PanyOn 1013m-tam Neill. this is a skillful reconstruction hear it there is anything wrong with E250 advance 10.00 The Day Today. Christopher Moms stops them dead in their tracks. It of the famous Australian Dingo the baby Leeds Metropolitan University and his team are onto the news as you're in the slightest bit murder court case. A woman is tned 10.30 Jo Brand Through The Cakehole Students Union it breaks - whether Its Interesting 11.05 The Word fainthearted, you will want to switch for killing her baby daughter who grand - Stomp - 'India/Gruver/fleeter' or borderline. 12.05 Beavis and Butthead off well In time to miss the 9prn-lam Tickets £3 arry/E8.50 door was carried off by a wild dog during and bloody -- finale. 10.30 Newsnight 12.40 I Know Why The Caged Bird expedition. 1,40 The James Whale Show. Followed The Cockpit a family camping Sings (1979). Based on the best- Swinegate, Leeds 11.15 The Mrs Merton Show. by News 12.15 Snooker - The Masters selling book by Maya Angelou, this Brroinon Beach - from The Who to Blur Comedienne Caroline Hook Is set to 2.40 The Big E 12.55 FILM: I Was A Teenage is a moving drama about a young 11pm-4arn Ed before 121E3.50 advance become the nation's agony aunt 3.35 The Story Of Steam Frankenstein (1957). Enough of girl (Constance Good) growing up in Town a Country Club when she hosts her first late-night 4.10 Shift these dreadful Frankenstein a small rural black community In Coca:nage Street. Leeds chat show. In the guise of Mrs 5.00 Sportsworid appropnations already. Or Arkansas in the 1930s. Low Trak:- 1970s disco Merton, she will do things that even 5.30 News The Underground Frankenstein fashions a monster 2.20 FILM: The Lone Wolf Meets A Alan Partridge couldn't. And the Cookndpe Street, Leeds tram selected morsels of old Lady (1940). Warren Williams stars This week's square eyes The Cooker corpses and kills a teenager to give guests are real! as Michael Lanyard, the Conner belong to: 11.45 Duckman lOpm-tam E5/e4 it a more handsome head. Anyone jewel thiet-turned-society-detective Glenn Burgess and Rio's we know? 12.10 Weatherview who comes to the aid of Jean Muir Manion Centre, Leeds 2.10 Weather 12.15 The Fugitive when she is charged with robbery Sarah Heenan The Lizard Out, - classic 60s 8 70s rock 2.15 Close 1.10 Close and murder; 3.40 Close If you would like to help us in WE NEED MEN AND WOMEN our work call us free on 0800 591 570 AGED OVER 18 AND NOT TAKING Please quote the place where you saw REGULAR MEDICATION this advert Here at the Clinic in Leeds we test the medicines of the YOU WILL BE COMPENSATED FOR future. which may be used to treat medical conditions such THE TIME YOU SPEND TAKING PART as heart desease. high blood preasure, asthma and IN OUR STUDIES many more. Springfield All studies are conducted under the supervision of our team House. of qual!fied medical staff and in accordance with the Royal BESSELAAR Hyde Street College of Physicians guidelines. CLINICAL RESEARCH UNIT Leeds LS2 9NG

4010 film IBBC1 saturday 1 1 pick of the day 'ITV lor 1 MOM vicar Lane Don't Forget Your Toothbrush II 7.25 News: Weather FILM: The Wizard of Oz 6.00 GMTV (01 13-245 2665) (9.00pm, Ch4) 7.30 Pine Animated frolics with that (2.40pm, BBC2) 9.25 What's Up Doc? Star Trek: Generations 12,30pm Sing-a-long-a-Judy. Not the lovely I want them to come to St. Mark's so 11.30 The Chart Show guru of style. No-one wears a 3.05pm 6 40pm 8.15prn Ms. Finnigan of This Morning fame, I can chuck my crappy hoover and 12.30 Movies. Games and yellow beak like he does Videos in,airviaie With The Vampire 1.30pm no unfortunately I get the feeling ironing board out of the window, but I 1.00 News: Weather 5.30orn 8.10prn 7.35 Look Sharp! she's tone deaf doubt Carl Potter would let me. 1.10 FILM: The Boy Who Stole A The Speciarist 5.50Pm 820Pm 7.50 Albert the 5th Musketeer Trapped in Paradise 3.15pm 8.15 Chucklevision Million (1960). Set in Valencia. Junior 1pm 8.35 Raccoons Spain this is the tale of a likable and Odeon - The Heedrow 9.00 Live and Kicking. Three hours of cunning young rapscallion who lives 0119-243 62301 Saturday morning entertainment with his widowed father and works 620prs 820pe, Leon 1.50pm hosted by Andi Peters and Emma 1BBC2 IICh4 4 as a bank messenger. He finds that Shallow Grave 1 .60pm 4.05pm aye Forbes. his taxi-driver father needs money 6.20pm 8.4opm I to get his cab out of hock and Stargete 1.451xn 5. tOpm 8 tOpin 12.12 Weather 8.00 Sesame Street, 7.00 °vide; 7.15 6,00 Open University decides to borrow some from the The Road To Weilville 1.40pm 525pm 12.15 Grandstand. Introduced by Steve Sonic The Hedgehog; 7.40 First Edition. 12.15 FILM: Stagecoach (1939). John bank. His haul, however turns out to 8 15prn Rider 12.20 Football Focus 1.00 8.00 Transworfd Sport: 9.00 Morning Line; Wayne plays the Ringo Kid in this be one million pesetas. Which is Only You 1.1oprn 3A0cirn 5.55pm News: 1.05 Racing from Newbury. 10.00 Tennis: 10.30 Kabaddi: 11.00 a 250m Western with everything - a young just about enough for three Coca- 1.20 Snooker: 1.35 Racing from Gazzerta Football Italia; 12.00 High 5; Hyde Park Cinema Newbury; 1.50 Snooker; 2.05 fugitive, a stagecoach with cavalry Colas and a small tapas dish in 12.30 The Great Maratha Brurieneii Road. LS6 Racing from Newbury: 2.25 escort and a journey through some of the places I've been to. 1.00 FILM: The Adventure Of Sherlock (0113-275 20451 Snooker: 2.55 Rugby League; 4.40 American Indian territory Unfortunately his theft not only Speed 6.30pm Holmes (1939). Basil Rathbone alerts the police but hair the thugs in Final Score. The Nolan Hearings Even Cowgirls Gel The Biwa; 9pm 1.50 stars as the pipe-chewing detective Valencia Reservoir DogsrTrue Romance 11pm 5.15 News: Weather FILM: The Wizard 01 Oz (1939). 2.40 up against the arch villain Professor 2.45 International Athletics. Great Cottage Road Cinema 5.25 Regional News And Weather When young Dorothy is whisked Moriarty who Is scheming to steal Britain v France. Jim Rosenthal Road. Far Heartiogiey 5.30 Tom and Jerry Double Bill Cottage away to a magic land, only the (0113-275 1806) 5.45 Big Break. I could suggest which the Crown Jewels introduces the action from The Interview With The Vampire. bits of Jim Davidson I'd like to Wizard of Oz has the power to 2.35 Channel 4 Racing Kelvin Hall, Glasgow, as Great Lounge Cinema break. Isn't the lovely John Virgo a return her home Stars Judy 5.05 Brookside Omnibus. Mandy, Britain face their second indoor North Lave. Headingley sexual icon. though? And who Garland possibly under the Sinbad and Beth face Intense meeting of the season against a 10113-275 16061 makes those gorgeous waistcoats? influence of hallucinogenic drugs. questioning by the police over powerful French squad. Shallow Grave 4.45 News: Sports Results: Weather 6.15 The Young Indiana Jones Well, at least Toto is Trevor's murder. Bev is snapped up This Ind* bloke 5.05 Calendar News: Weather Chronicles. 4.20 Snooker - The Masters by the press, much to Ron's doesn't 'art get about a bit, and embarrassment. and will Emma 5.10 Scoreline thootro 5.20 Saturday Week: TOTP2. The 520 New today he's doin' it with Catherine succumb to Barry's charms? Baywatch. Old Baywatch, on groovy sounds of days gone by. the other hand, involves West Yorkshire Playhouse Zeta Jones. 6.30 Right To Reply. Roger Bolton Mr. Noel music news and a look at this Chomondley-Wamer chucking a Dually Hilt Mount, Leeds 7.00 Noel's House Party. presents more viewers ideas about 10113-244 2111) Edmonds hosts another live week's charts set the tune of 'Top of beach-towel at Beryl Reid. An old television and loins them to take to The Waver Guest by Sherman extravaganza from Cnnkley Bottom, the Pops' offspring. 'TOTP2' Mend of Mitch's, a Ventura County the programme makers. MacDonald. directed by Also Rickman with Mike Atherton getting a sheriff and part-time lifeguard. 6.05 Saturday Week: Late Again 7.00 News 3pm 7.45pni 'Gotcha'. causes havoc at Baywatch when he Bennett. with 6.50 Saturday Week: What The Paper Getang On by Alan 7.50 The National Lottery Live. Hosted 7.10 A Week In Politics: Weather uses strong-arm tactics to rid the West, directed by Pronota Say Timothy by Anthea Turner and Gordon 8.00 Keepers Of The Kingdom: Edge beach of two tramps who have Stales 8pm Kennedy live from Liverpool's Town 7.05 News: Weather Of The Abyss. Much of the high been drinking. Understandably, his Civic Theatre 7.20 Correspondent. Jim Muir visits a Docoincige Street. Leeds Hall It could be you! plateau of Ethiopia is wild, unknown actions make waves. the Importance or Being Earnest by 8.05 Casualty. Ash faces an uncertain Muslim training school in Pakistan mountain country torn by mile deep 6.15 International Gladiators. Every Oscar Wilde r 30prn future as his assault case comes to - one of the main recruiting gorges The wildlife that thrives in time they warn you not to try this at Tickets E'5.50/t4.50N3 50 court. An accident involving grounds for radical Sunni Muslim this isolated area includes the home, I am so sorely tempted to attach bungee ropes to the light environmental protesters ends up groups like the SSP - and Srmien fox and gelada baboons, with the leader's wife in hospital who five not only on the physical fittings in my room. discovers that some of the children 7.15 Join Cilia and her six clubs And a friend of of Jude's is edge of the abyss, but also the Blind Date. are kept in chains to keep them hopefuls, ready with the cokes as assaulted in the street and then edge of extinction from running away. two contestants take on the lucky The Cockpit diagnosed as HIV positive 9.00 Don't Forget Your Toothbrush II. 8.55 News: Sport: Weather 8.05 The Dancing Room. Well. Its not dip of Blind Date. Plus news of Iasi Siwinegate, Leona Carrot-topped Chris Evans presents Prnpaeende dance 9.15 Ghosts. Strange tale of a woman Back to Basics. I envisage lots of week's couples another wild show where anything 1 h orn-Barn convinced that her husband has crinkleys tea-dancing. (ITV Will Bring You The Result Of The .aeds University Union killed their child in order to get her can happen (and usually does). not 8.55 Arena: Peter Sellers. A three-pail Lottery Live, As It Happens) iarvey Mirk Bar money When the ghostly figure of a least the chance to go on an exotic 8.15 Family Fortunes. Two families portrait 01 one of the world's Celebration child appears, is it really the little girl Caribbean holiday. compete for cash, prizes and the 197011 night 9pm-tam greatest comic actors. Peter or is it a vision? Starring Tim 10.05 Paul Merton - The Second jackpot by guessing what the The Pleasure Rooms Piggott-Smith and Julia McKenzie. Sellers, the Goon who shot to Series, Paul Merlon looks at the Lower Marion Street, Leeds survey says in the quiz show hosted International lame as inspector &ick ro Pssios 10.10 Match of the Day chaos theory of the beer-mug, a by Les Dennis. The Music Factory 11.10 The Danny Baker Show. Danny Clouseau. The programme tells the standard lamp and the head of a 8.45 News: Lottery Update: Weather Lower Bogner°. Leeds tackles life and football with ex- story of Sellers complicated public traffic warden (as one does). 9.00 FILM: A Cut Above (1989). Hard Times dance Scottish international Andy Gray. and private life, with contnbutions 10.35 Is This Your Life? Jimmy Savile Matthew Module stars in this drama P.10 eittrance_18 members Ex-'Avengers' Joanna Lumley. from his family, friends and chats to Andrew Neil about his life about a working-class medic who LJAU Students Union Patrick Macnee and Gareth Hunt feels out of place among the well- colleagues as a famous DJ and television Legendary Saturday Deco are reunited in the studio. and heeled students of his college. 3pr1-2arn Tickets £2 10.05 presenter as well as raising £30 Squeeze perform some of their The Buccaneers. Second showing 11.00 FILM: Old Gringo (1989). A Happy Hour 9-10 85p pints million for charity greatest hits. of the opening episode of Edith spinster from Washington goes on Town & Country Club 11.20 The Nightmare Years. Continuing 11.55 Snooker - The Masters Wharton's novel about tour spirited the run and heads for Mexico to Cookridge Street. Leeds the true story of Amencan journalist 1.25 FILM: Blood of the Vampire young Amencan girls who arrive in escape the influence of her parents. top Barone - 1980s disco William Shirer working in Nazi The Underground (1958). Classic chiller starting Britain in the 18705. charming all She is swept into the middle of the Germany. It is 1938 and Tess is Cookndge Street, Leeds Donald Wolfit as Or Callistratus, a with their beauty and their fathers' 1913 Mexican revolution, but also The V ardbird Suite resuscitated vampire who runs an pregnant The Shirers move to wealth into a tragic love triangle between a aprn-tam Live benci and jazz DJs asylum for the criminally insane with Austna, but when the Nazis invade young rebel and an old writer With 11.25 FILM: The Wrong Arm Of The Bar Basics the help of his dumb, one-eyed they are forced to flee again. Jane Fonda and Gregory Peck, Lower Manion Street. Leeds hunchback assistant, Carl. Law (1963). With Peter Sellers 1.05 Late Licence; 1.15 The Beat 1.05 Coach. 1.35 Tour Of Duty; 2.30 BPM; Back to Basics Pre Clue 2.50 Weather 12.55 Later With Jools Holland Specials: 2.20 The Word, 3.20 My Dead 3.30 The Little Picture Show; 4.25 Cue Free Entry 2.55 Close 1.55 Close Dad. 3.55 The Real World: 4.25 Close The Music: 5.30 News

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Richard and Philippa 3 05pm 5,40prn 8.15pm 10.00 See Head: 10.30 Tae French Butler a crumpet, turn up the central In last week's gripping installment, celebrate Valentine's Day with PJ interview With The Vampire t 30P111 Experience; 10.45 Who Learns Wins, heating and drool Over Hugh Scully. Rik Mayall showed us that he did and Duncan. Bad Boys Inc and top 5.30pm 8.10om 11.00 The 11th Hour: 12.00 CountryFile; actually have some talent after all. agony columnist Karen The Specialist 5.50pm 8 20pm 12.25 Weather for the Week Ahead; 12.30 Kriztanovich. Plus the usual cartoon Trapped le Paradise 3.15prn News. On the Record; 1.30 EastEnders; fun with 'Winnie the Pooh'. Junior Iptn 2.50 Alias Smith and Jones: 3.45 Biteback 'Aladdin', 'The Little Mermaid' and Odeon - The Headrow 4.25 Bookworm Special. Grill Rhys Bankers'. (0119-243 82301 Jones presents a special edition of 10.15 LIE343nnkM% Leon 1.50prn 5.20pm 8.20pm the popular magazine programme. IBBC2 Ch4 10.30 Sunday Brunch Shallow Grave 1.sepm 4.05pm 4.55 The Clothes Show. Spring is in the 11.00 Morning Worship 6,20pm 8.40pm air. Brenda Emmanus reports from I 12.25 Kickabout Stegall, 1 45prn 5.10pm 8.10pm 6.15 Open University; 9.10 Grimmy, 9.25 6.15 Transworld Sport: 7.10 Chigley 7.25 The Road To Weilviiie 1.40prn 5.25pm Australia and Korea on a fabric 1.00 News: Weather made from the fleece of super-fine The Artbox Bunch; 9.40 Charlie Brown Madeline, 7.55 Fourways Farm; 8.10 1.10 Jonathan Dimbleby 8.15pm For Amusement Merino sheep. They are so And Snoopy Show; 10.05 Inspector Gadget: 8.35 Bill And Ted's 2.00 Highway To Heaven Only You 1 10pm 3 40pm 5 55Pir Only; 10.30 Grange Hill; 10.55 Elidor: cossetted that they're given Exceltent Adventures: 9.00 WIldside. 9.30 230 The Match - Live: Swindon 8,25pm 11.20 As Seen on TV: 11.45 The 0-Zone raincoats to protect them. Back To The Future; 9.55 Dennis; 10.15 Town v Bolton Wanderers. 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Crabbe Choir to victory in this spectacular 1.45 Football Italia everywhere she goes, someone (0113-275 1606) finds himself investigating threats to example of why British television is 4.00 Inside The Vacation dies. I mean, you'd think they'd interview With The Vampire Britain's most gifted psychic possibly the worst In the world latter 5.00 Adagio Cantabile have twigged that it was her by Lounge Cinema medium, and discovers that there Belarusse) 5.05 News: Weather now. North Lane, 1-teachrivey may be a link between the threats 5.10 Rugby Special. John Inverdale 5,10 High Interest: Honey, They 6.05 Calendar Yippee. (0113-275 16061 and the death of a local girl. presents action from yesterday's Shrunk The Pensions. 6.30 News: Weather Shallow Grave 8.20 Goodnight Sweetheart Courage League Division One 6.00 Don't Forget Your Toothbrush II. 6.45 Barrymore. Showcase Cinema 8.50 News: Weather match between Northampton. Another chance to catch up on last 7.45 Agatha Christie's Poirot - Geldent Road, Btrstall 9.05 The Buccaneers, A load of tarts struggling at the bottom of the table, night's show. Hickory Dickory Dock. The mouse (01924-420622) and Sale. 7.00 Guest For The Ark. There was a Leon running round in poncy dresses. ran up the clock. David Suchet stars 6.10 The Natural World: Gentle Jaws rumour that it was buried in an episode that involves a lethal Margate And anyway. Edith Wharton never of the Serengeti Star Trek Generations finished the novel. Blooming BBC somewhere in Hyde Park. Then dose of drugs. Funny that. 7.00 Rough Guide to the World. The Specialist cutbacks. again, it could be a scandalous 9.45 Rik Mayall Presents The National Magenta De Vine and Simon Solitaire For Two 10.00 A Bit Of Fry And Laurie. Stephen rumour. Lottery - well I'm sure he'd be better O'Brien are in Florence Magenta Interview With The Vampire Fry and Hugh Laurie lel loose with 8.00 Reality On The Rocks 1/3, Ken at it than Gordon. wears her usual black garb, and Shallow Grave their comic talents in this new Campbell tries to explain the 10.45 News: Weather Simon lends a hand. Sexy shoes Forrest Gump series. Fans of the last programme Stephen Hawking book 'The History 11.00 The South Bank Show. Melvyn and a thriving transsexual The Road To Weliville will be pleased to hear that Hugh of Time', starting his journey in Bragg talks to Jonathan Miller community are amongst the city's Pulp 'Mr Music' Laurie will be tinkling Hackney and ending up on the top (whoever he is). The lads gel attractions The Lion King of a mountain in the Canary Islands. together for a pint and a packet of away on the ivories, with Fry 7.40 The Money Programme Reservoir Dogs 9.00 Tippett's Times. Sir Michael playing the perfect, debonair host. Moving Pictures, Presented by pork scratchings whilst they talk Tirnecop 8.20 10.30 Heart Of The Matter: Voice of the Howard Schuman. Oliver Stone Tipped, Britain's greatest living about 18th century opera Only You Victim. Joan flaming Bakewell composer, was interviewed in his recontextualised In a 20th century Four Weddings and a Funeral talks candidly about the furore comes up with some contentious caused by 'Natural Born Killers'. 90th birthday year by Natalie setting Or maybe not issue for us to worry our pants off which finally opens, uncut in the Wheen 12.00 Quiz Night assize Wier. UK on February 24. 10.00 FILM: Coupe De Ville (1990). 12.30 The Beal 11.05 Heavenly Bodies 9.10 The Trial of OJ Simpson 11.50 FILM: Summer With Monlka 1.30 Zara Ohyan I3ein (1952). Sounds purriaaraplac, then 1.35 FILM: Satyamev Jayete (1987) Corn Exchange. Leeds 11.35 FILM: Ferris Buelier's Day Off 10.00 The Road. 4.30 Jobflnder &army - free admisaitin (1986). Retro 130s! Hurrah! 10.50 Snooker - The Masters again it might not be. Envelope bluffing In Ileon-Sprn 1.15 Weather 11.50 FILM: Badlands (1973). 1.35 The Earth Is Our Mother 5.30 "Clee tt lhOrpeS,e Et .42 per hr. 1,20 Close 1.25 Close 2.35 Close

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VISION eak P T IC I A N A Revolution AB) I f-/VI)AZC__)/1 - in soft contact Soft Contact Lenses lens care FIND US I LEEDS UNIVERSITY STUDENT UNION In times past inter- railing in Europe was the most popular holiday choice for students. Now the latest travel fad is inter-railing though North America. Is life really so much better over there? JULIE O'REGAN crossed the Big Pond to find out...

'Well, to be honest it was More oi a youth club disc° ational Larnpoonts Anivrtal Souse but with a puce and a huge tree breakfast of wattles and bagels, no N was complaining:

oes the 'special relationship' still exist? I was lust a little bit walking up the road, guessed where we were going and gave us a lift somewhere to get a few hours sleep. The next day we set out nervous before crossing the Atlantic. I'd heard tales of to the door. He then insisted we went for a swim in his friend's determined to find somewhere free to stay. We talked to saran ialence and unfriendliness in North America in the months private pool. people as possible at a pro-cannabis rally in one of the parka/zips .lore I left. Our next port of call was Washington, which seemed in a world of pointed towards the student-rich Cambridge area. I hadn'taraltiel And when I landed in Toronto I was just an l8-year-old its own with its trimmed lawns, war memorials and state buildings. this was the weekend when people were returning to Harvartbathe girl with an American train pass, not quite enough money to The heart of the city however was in Georgetown, where students sat are was really busy with street entertainers and newly-arrival last the month until the flight home and a couple of about in trendy cafes, bars and restaurants. Baltimore was only an students. I had heard rumours of mad student parties downtlyarl addresses of distant relatives who weren't exactly expecting hour away and we went solely to watch a balieball game. If I had so we set off to investigate on campus. Trying to look inconstioxas me, So just how did this hell turn into the holiday of a lifetime? arrived with a shaky understanding of this national institution, we we went into an open door and found a wall filled with posts It didn't get off to a great start on the first night which was spent in left even more confused, despite the 'helpful' pointers from a rather advertising parties. Taking our lives into my hands I rang amonter. a very cheap and very unofficial youth hostel in Toronto, My friend drunk ex-marine sitting to our left. told someone where we were and got told we'd be picked ufa10 found herself sharing a creaky old bunkbed with a flatulent Mike It was time to head back up the coast and on to Boston - definitely minutes. We didn't have a clue where we were off to and wee t McShane look-a-like who seemed poised to fall through the mattress a city to recommend. The accommodation situation was so dire we pretty certain our mums would he outraged if they knew mee we The guy reeell and onto her head at any moment. Somewhat bizarrely, I appeared to caught the overnight train back to New York so we'd at least have were doing, but, we were on holiday, weren't have Brad from NeiAlratoN asleep on top of me (so to speak). Not to be put off by my inauspicious welcome to North America, I headed off to be amazed by the `Wonder' that is Niagra Falls. Here the tourist is faced with a dizzying range of choices - du you go under, over or round the falls or head straight tor the ultimate thrill and go really close in a small boat wearing a mouldy old kagoor the 'Maid of the Mist' boat journey is probably the most memorable. it only for the excitement of getting totally drenched in a rnaliner reminisceni of the log flume at Alton Tower, We soon (iound ourselves suffering from Falls fatigue - developing a blase approa,11 ii..a.m,141):: next to thousands 01 tonnes of iii-ding water - we walk e■I a, ro,, border into the USA. Buitalo Greyhound ennui proved to be just the orst of sayer.) high quality location!. where we found trey accommodation. After dawn walk to the railway station. we jumped on the loam train to New cirk and our ishIstle-stop tour of East Coast ot America gi it underway. I could hardly believe 1 was in New Would we get shot" WoUld we get kidnapped and sold to a crack dealer' Would we meet 1'Yoody Allen' The answer to all of the above is no, hoI we did have a brilliant time hanging out in Greenwich Village and central Park. pretending to he very rich in the huge department stores. We also splashed out on the Statten Island Ferry trip across the harbour la measly 50 cents) before going to Wall Street and Chinatown. New York is truly 'awesome' in every sense et the word. It's like a huge city-sized film eel and reminded me of the dozens of American cop shows tee watched since I was a kid. I was warned in advance not to expect a city of brotherly love when we got to Philadelphia. This was pretty weird because this was one of the friendliest place, I visited, We were Nhuvvrt around by someone we Met and }people were falling, over themselves to give us direithae- to an out-of-town youth hostel The hostel owner saw us •

nice enough, so we hopped in and got taken to a fraternity house where the beer was free and the joint was jumping. Well, to be honest it was more of a youth club disco than National Lampoon's Animal House but with a place to kip and a huge free breakfast of waffles and bagels, no-one was complaining. We even had somewhere to stay the next night after a pair of jolly buskers called Pete and Joe fell for our hard luck story and offered us their floor. Whalewatching and visits to Quincy Market were other things that meant this was the coolest place I'd been to so far. Montpellier in Vermont was the next stop on our itinerary. couldn't remember exactly why we'd decided to come here beyond a rather vague idea that we were looking for a real New England town. Whatever the reason, we ended up in Nowheresville, USA_ As usual, the people were as ridiculously friendly as ever and the merest mention of the fact that we had no idea where we were staying resulted in our being handed the keys for the local sports centre - complete with showers, TV and basketball court. After forgetting my initial fears that the owner was a serial killer who would return in the night, we had a pretty cool time pretending to be American shooting hoops, eating pizza and watching cable. Montreal was the final destination 1 could reach with our train ass. I thought it was a reasonably inoffensive city but it lett my friends stone cold. They thought it was 'too Frenik - but that's the whole point of the place_ I soon overcame the language barrier in Dunkin' Donuts, ordering, 'citrons' and 'du beurres' with ease but with appalling accents_ On our last night there. with hinds running seriously low, we scraped together just enoue money to go and see a band I saw in the local paper called brelined, I'd never-heard of them either. In a sad groupie-type manner I talked to them - afterwards_ It turned out that like us they were oft to Toronto the next day. We arranged to see them there and ended up staving with them in a pretty nice hotel. We had an excellent time hanging out with them and even made a record with a member of the Barenaked Ladies (semi-famous Canadian band.) After bidding the band a sad farewell as they headed oft to Cleveland, we spent our last couple of days in Canada. It was on a farm with my friend's fifth cousin. eight times removed. They had at least heard of my friend which made us feel a little less guilty about accepting their boundless hospitality After a month of travelling, we were ready to go home. I'd had an excellent tune and had plenty of stories l didn't want our parents to hear - always the sign of a good holiday. If you're on a tight budget like l was, you can still have the time of .your lives. 'The only advice I'd give to those that might be worried about personal safety in North America - you're more at risk of being fed to death by the people you meet than Of getting attacked in the street. You have-been warned!

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Odeon - The Headrow 3.30 Cartoon: 3.45 Bodger and Badger; 10.35 Thls Morning (0113-243 8230) 4.00 Jackanory: The Ferog Pwince The Leon 1.50pm 5.20pm 8.20gm 12.20 News: Weather Only You 1.10prn 3.40pin 6.55pril Twuth 1BBC2 liCh4 4 I 12.55 Coronation Street 825pm 4.10 The Legend of Prince Valiant I DSO 1.25 Home And Away. Rob has to admit Shallow Gravo 1.50pm 4 05pm fancy him, I do. And it's got Tim that teaching isn't quite as bad as 6.20 Open University 6.20pm 8 40pm Curry in rt. 6.35 Sandokan; 7.00 The Big Breakfast; he'd imagined. Curtis and Shannon Stargate 1.45prrt 5.10PM a 10pei 8.00 News 9.00 You Bet Your Life; 9.30 Schools; arrive in the middle of a full-scale The Road To Wellvitie 1.40pin 5.25pm 4.35 Tomorrow's End 8.15 Westminster On-Line 12.00 Right To Reply; 12.30 Sesame argument between Pippa and 8 15pm 5.00 Newsround 9.00 Schools Street; 1.30 Little Miss; Paddington, Michael. Hyde Park Cinema 5.10 Blue Peter, I want Lesley Judd 2.00 Tales Of Aesop Frootle Tootles and The Wombles; 1.55 1.55 A Country Practice Biutterrea Road. LS6 back (0113-275 2045) 2.05 Rupert The Pulse, 225 Travels A La Cade; 3.00 2.20 Wish You Were Here...? 5.35 Neighbours Dracula 8.30pin 2.10 FILM: Warm Hearts, Cold Feet Late Late Show; 3.55 3,000 Mile Garden; 2.50 Help Yourself Even Cowgirls Get The Blues 91)m 6.00 Six O'Clock News: Weather (1987). Comedy in which the private 4.30 Countdown; 5.00 Golden Girls 2.55 Shortland Street Cottage Road Cinema 6.30 Regional News Magazines 5.30 Nurses: Coming To America 3.20 News Cottage Road Fez Heedmgley lives of two married Journalists 7.00 Champion Telly Addicts - 6.00 The Cosby Show 3.30 Children's ITV: Rainbow (0113-275 1806) become the subject of their Champion Of Champions. 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West Yorkshire Playhouse 4.00 Today's The Day secretive and small - the females 6.30 Crimestoppers Special Ricky finds himself caught between Quarry Hill Mount, Leeds 4.30 Ready, Steady, Cook are said to be able to pass through 7.00 Wish You Were Here... ? Judith (0113-244 21111 two women and agrees to make a a wedding ring The programme Chalmers pays a visit to Warwick Sharman 5.00 The Oprah Winfrey Show. When The Winter Guest by choice between them. Nellie's Castle: John Carter explores three - Crime Paralyses You. The Queen captures the lifestyle of these two MacDonald directed by Alan Radurue American cities that helped shaped 7 45pM poorly condition gives the Fowlers a bandits and finds out if it's true that of chat goes straight to the heart of a nation; and Anna Walker goes to Getting On try Alan Bennett, wrih turn and Nigel prepares for stoats can hypnotise their prey into the problem when she speaks to Holland by barge and bicycle Timothy West, directed try Prunella Valentine's Day by making a bulk immobility Scales 7.30prn victims of violent crime. 7.30 Coronation Street. Reg solves a purchase. 8.30 Only When I Laugh. Norman is the 5.40 Buck Rogers In The 25th- only witness to road accident work problem for Curly. But why is 8.30 The Detectives. The clueless a Century. Twiki the robot is captured outside the hosprtal, and his the latter not grateful? comedy twosome are dispatched to the isle by three all-powerful female testimony could send the culprit to 8.00 Lucky Numbers. Three of Wight on a top-secret mission to contestants are plucked from the Leeds University Union warnors. Much better than Star pnson. Will he do his public duty studio audience and given the Harvey Milk Bar protect a rare bird and Its eggs As Trek. and tell the truth? chance to win £20,000. Newcastle Blown Ale Comedy Network ever the pub beckons, and the eggs 6.30 The Private Life Of Plants Is there 9.00 Cutting Edge. Driving from A to B Tim Vine with Roger 8.30 World in Action presents are left to fend for themselves. something that your varigated should be simple, but when you Monkhause and Ricky Grover 9pm 9.00 FILM: Deceived (1991). A Goldie Stamng Bill Oddle as the bird-crazy consider that trucks crush cars. cars Begonia is trying to hide'? Hawn special, in which she takes Professor Rose mow down children and drunk 7.20 Concertos From Coventry. 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John Thaw stars staging his own death as well as Lower arigstaiii, Leeds teenage love in this bittersweet kills a baby girl. Sipowicz secretly Up The Junction as the man who brought aerial killing others to get what he wants. drama. The romance is set against relocates the corpse of a fellow 10orm2am E3/E250 PoprDance 10.00 News: Weather terror to the German people during a backdrop of racial tension, as well Bitter/Leger Et 20 per pint Pits El detective who died on the fob with a the Second World War. 'Bomber' 10.40 Film Concluded Including Supersonic on top floor as the colourful and somewhat prostitute in a seedy motel. 11.40 Prisoner Cell Block H Harris was the controversial head of India/Retro eccentric fives of the local 10.55 Tommy Davidson: illin' In PhIlly 12.35 FILM: Fire And Ice (1961). A Gallic yet the RAF Bomber Command who community. Not set in Coventry 11.35 FILM: Medea (1970). A powerful tale of love and political Merrion Centre. 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The pulling celebrated playwrights. and famous 1.35 Eye To Eye 5/5 off to discover who betrayed the City Square. Leeds down of a tree in a suburban husbands, following his bnef 2.10 FILM: Whoopee (1930). Immensely group - leaving his wde behind. Student Eiltravagenza backyard leads to the opening of a marriage to Marilyn Monroe Admission £1 plus tree bottle 9f cider entertaining early screen musical Stamng Romy Schneider, Jean- gateway to hell. through which 11.55 Club open till 3am Weathervlew about a timid hypochondriac who Lous Trinegnant and Henri Serre. Cralg's ancient demons are attempting to 12.00 Medicine: The Challenge Of helps a young girl to find Irue love. Followed by News New Briggate, Leeds gain entrance to world. Judgement Starring Paul Gregory, John 2.25 The New Music Fenix student night 1.35 Weather 12.25 Introduction to Design Rutherford and Eddie Cantor. The Chart Show 99p pints 3.25 1.40 Close 1.15 The Record; 1 40 Close 3.45 Close 4.20 Jobfinder: 5.30 News a special p pkidpre ents valenties love in wed LEEDS METRO SPECK WOWS (OVEN UNI SU 15/2/9 £1 IN B4 10.30 9.00 till soo*85p a pint* all night £2 AFTER film IBBC1 I tuesday 14 pick of the day IITV No MGM Wear Len 1..Timekeepers (0113.245 2666) 6,00 Business Breakfast; 7.00 BBC Tots TV 6.00 GMTV (1:50pm, BBC1) (3:40pm, ITV) Star Trek: Generations 12_30pm Breakfast News; 9.05 Kilroy: 10.00 News. 9.25 Chain Letters. Ted Robbins Another daytime presenter that I'm a tot, Je suis un tot. 3.06pm Regional News: Weather-, 10.05 Good presents the quiz show that Interview With The Vampire 1,30pm you've never heard of presents 25 Why didn't they have programmes of Morning with Anne & Nick, 12.00 News, changes a letter and makes a 5,30pm 8 30pm minutes of fun(?) Watch it and such a high quality when I was little. 12.05 Pebble Mill; The Seecialial rpm 5.50pm 8.20pre 12.55 News weep. We just had Bagpuss. chain Trapped In Paradise 3.16pm 1,30 Neighbours. Mark's lob is on the 9.55 News Odeon • The Heedrow line. while Cheryl and Lou lace 10.00 The Time... The Place... (0113-243 6230) nuptial complications. 10.35 This Morning Leon 1 50pm 520pm 820Pm 1.50 Time Keepers 12.20 Calendar News. Shallow Greve 1.50pm 4.05pm BBC2 WeatherlBllsdele: Network North 6.20prn 8.40pm 2.15 FILM: How To Commit Marriage ca. ICh4 Wives 1.45pm 5.tOpm 8.10pm (1969). Comedy with Bob Hope, I I 12.30 News: Weather 12.55 Ernmerdaie The Road To WellvIlle 1.40pm 5.25pm Jackie Gleason and Jane Wyman 6.20 Open University. 8.00 News; 8.15 6.35 Sandokan. 7.00 The Big Breakfast; 1.25 Home And Away. 8.15pm In this family saga, romantic dreams Westminster On-Line' 9.00 Schools. 2.00 Jack's chain ot Only You 1.10pm 3.40pm 5.55prn 9.00 You Bet Your Life, 9.30 Schools, girlfriends is finally broken (and clash with disillusionment. Gordon T Gopher, 2.10 Horizon: 3.00 8.25pm 12.00 House To House: 12.30 Sesame about time, tool). 3.50 Jackanory: The Fwog Pwince The News: Westminster; 3.50 News; 4.00 Hyde Park Cinema Street; 1.30 Widget; 1.55 On A Wing And 1.55 A Country Practice emoerwei Road, LS6 Twuth! Rik Mayall narrates Kaye Today's the Day; 4.30 Regional A Prayer; 2.10 FILM: The Frogmen 2.20 Vanessa (0113-275 20451 Umansky's story about the Programmes (1951); 4.00 The Way We Were; 4.30 2.50 Shortland Street Drecula 8.30pm unfortunate prince who transforms 5,00 Children's Hospital Countdown, 5.00 The Oprah Winfrey Even Cowgirls Get The Blues 9pm 3.20 News into an ugly frog. 5.30 Catchword, Bryan the computer Show: True Love Reunited Cottage Road Cinema challenges three worcisworths in the 3.25 Yorkshire: Calendar Cottage Road, Far rieerdiegiey 4.00 Willy Fogg This has got one of the 5.50 Terrytoons popular game. News/Bilsdale: Network North (0113-275 15061 best theme tunes in T.V.land. 6.00 Babylon 5: Revelations. Londo 8.00 Fresh Prince of Bel Air. Will is 3.30 Children's ITV: The Magic House interview With The Vampire 4.25 Grlmmy becomes more indebted to sinister 3.40 Tots TV Lounge Cinema introduced to the sorority pledges 4.35 Incredible Games Morden while Dr Franklin uses an 3.50 Twinkle The Dream Being North Lane Heacingley as 'the biggest dog on campus' and 5.00 Newsround experimental procedure to bring 10113-275 16061 gets more than he bargained for 4.00 Budgie The Little Helicopter 5.10 Grange Hill. The 'Lonely Hearts' Garibaldi out of his coma. Sheila* Grave when he goes on a date with Lisa. 4.15 The Dreamstone 6.55 Terrytoons scheme runs into trouble 6.25 Heartbreak High. II's got blondes, 4,40 Chris Cross. A teacher persuades 7.00 Channel 4 News: Weather 5.35 Neighbours it's got dark, brooding males, it Chris and Cross to get a group tlagoistro 7.50 The Slot 6.00 Six O'Clock News: Weather hasn't got a scnpt together for a talent contest. 6.30 Regional News Magazines 8.00 Classic Trucks. Monster trucks Unfortunately, the contest doesn't West Yorkshire Playhouse 7.10 The Tick. The big blue superhero take to the road - from Scammell exist Quarry Hiii Mount, Leeds 7.00 Holiday. Jill Dando visits !he Gower does battle with El Seed - a . tractors made for transporting 250 10113.244 21111 Peninsular in South Wales Why, human flower intent on world 5.10 Home And Away ton electricity transformers to the The Winter Guest by Sharman it's cold. it's wet, and the only thing domination. 5.40 News: Weather 300 ton Caterpillar dump trucks MacDonald. directed by Alan Rickman you can do is go hang-gliding off 7.30 Under The Covers. Contributors 6.30 Crosswits 7 45prn used in open cast mining. Worm's head. from all over the country discuss the 7.00 Emmerdaie. Chris sabotages Kim's Getting On by Alan Bennett. with 8.30 Brookside. Valentine's Day on the 7.30 EastEnders. So much for passions and traumas of reading. business, while the enterprising Timothy Weal, directed by Prunelle Close leads to a 'Massacre' and the There's more to a good book than Dingies recycle items from the Scales 7.30erm Valentine's Day - Carol is annoyed Finger is firmly pointed at the Grand Theatre you realise! Woolpack. Jessica's Valentine with Alan, Ricky spreads his love Farnham's. Shifty Jimmy has New Elnegate. Leeds 8.00 Public Eye: Big Trouble In Little hopes are dashed. too thin and Goof's romantic dinner secrets to sell and Mandy and Beth Great Expectations - the mineral Schools. Children as young as six 7.30 Good Advice gets out of hand have an appointment at the Written by Mike Reed (yes, him) are being expelled from schools all 8.00 The Bill. Marshall breaks a 8.00 A Question of Sport Magistrate's Court 7„30prn t8 50.£19,50 over the country because ol their suspects arm - but has he injured 8.30 Ain't Misbehavin. Just when Sonia violent disruptive behaviour. 9.00 Visions Of Heaven And Hell. Will an Innocent man? has had enough trouble with Clive. the virtual reality of computers 0 clubs Although they damage the 8.30 September Song. Gentle comedy they pretend to burgle her cottage education of other children In their benefit humanity or is tt just another starring Russ Abbot and Michael and are caught by the police class. Mike Embley reports that the opportunity for the rich to become Williams. Billy plots revenge, while Bar Berea 9.00 News: Weather cost of expelling them can be even ncher and the poor, poorer in this Ted has a choice to make following Lower Merrioni Street. Leeds 9.30 A valentine's Day Special: A Wild greater than keeping them in final episode Virtual Reality inventor Interesting offer from Jimmy Friesian- Hip hop. Jazz. Funk Romance. A 'fascinating and school Javan Lanier is among those who PlinthPan . The Underground unusual look at love and romance in will forecast the future world. 9.00 Peak Practice. A group ot ex- Cookndge Street, Leeds 8.30 Food And Drink. John Burton the animal kingdom. Valentine's 10.00 FILM: Bonds Of Love (1992). psychiatric patients move into The R&B Club Race visits Mauritius and discovers Treat Williams plays a man with Cardale. charging me area with Live Muse 7.30pnerradrught 1...51t4 Day usually brings thoughts of one of the world's most unusual Rio's faithful couples. but in the animal cuisines. Why don't they visit my learning difficulties who defies his tension and raw nerves . Merren Centre, Leeds kingdom this Is actually quite rare. kitchen and sample thefluff on my over-protective family when he finds 10.00 News: Weather Bolchts Brass • IndleAkemative This lover's guide to the animal Farmer's Boy cheese. true love His !amity attempt to end 10.40 Network First: Desperately tOpne2am 9.00 Sykes: Stranger his romance with twice-married Seeking Asylum. Don'tcha just Bitter S. Pits £1 Lager £1.30 Cider £1.40 kingdom reveals all, Ben Kelly McGill* who is trying to love these witty titles that sound like £1.25 10.00 FILM: The Presidio (1988). Action 9.30 Horizon: Twice Born. Newcastle Brown overcome abuse and alcohol and they might be a film that you The Music Factory thriller starring Sean Connery, Mark Crosland was born twice - at only start a new life actually want to watch Not Lower &legate, Leeds Harmon and Meg Ryan. Two 24 weeks old he was removed from 11.45 Bakersfield PD: Last One into featuring Madonna and Rosanna Automatic '95 - The best in rock. pop enemy police officers are assigned his mother to undergo experimental and Northern Sour surgery. Pioneering research can The Water. Stiles forgets to install a Arquette, but John McCarthy Not to work on a murder case. As their 10prn-2am £3 entrance now transplant cells from one foetus spa in the police station and finds half as sexy. investigation progresses and their Happy - dance to another. and some even believe himself up to his neck in hot water. 11.40 FILM: 13 L Stryker - Grand Theft WS MIX animosity deepens. the pair that organ and tissue transplants 12.15 Football Italia - Mezzanotte Hotel (1990). Burt Reynolds and Cal Lane, Leeds uncover deadly conspiracy. 1.15 Blood, Sweat And Glory Lent Anderson star in this TV drama Student Nigro are possible. Horizon asks. how far 11.35 FILM: J Edgar Hoover (1986) The Funk. Jazz, Lann, Dub should we go to create the perfect 1.50 FILM: Dreaming (1944). Up-beat about Stryker. this time given the Tequila & Corona Beer El film portrait of a man who was human being", wartime comedy which finds job of protecting a pnceless director of the FBI for 48 years 10.30 Newanlght soldiers Flanagan and Allen necklace at a leweller's convention e music During that time he turned the 11.15 The Late Show heroically attempting to revive a in the Bahamas n investigation agency into one of the 11.55 Weatherview pretty Wren who has tainted in a 1.25 The Little Picture Show; News most feared organisations in the 12.00 Open Mind crowded train. Flanagan, struck 2.25 Sport AM 3.25 The Beat The Ouches* world With Treat Williams. 12.25 Social Psychology down by falling luggage. has a VW Lem Leeds 1.25 Weather 1.30 The Record series of dreams. 4.20 Jobfinder aevrte 1.30 Close 1.55 Close 3.10 Close 5.30 News

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Valid until 25th Feb 1995 L IBBC1 iwednesday 1 S Pick of the day ITV v *AGM Vicar Lane 6.00 Business Breakfast Star Trek: The Next Generation The Best of The Tube 6.00 GMTV 10113.245 2685) 7.00 BBC Breakfast News (6:00pm, BBC2) (11.00pm, Ch4) 9.25 Chain Letters Star Trek: Generations 1230pm 9.05 Kilroy At least William Shainer's not in it. Oh memories. Remember French 9.55 News: Weather 3.05prn 5.40pm 8 15prn Jean Luc Picard is a sex-god. I've and Saunders as the groupies? Why intennew With The Vampire 1.30prn 10.00News: Regional News: 10.00 The Time... The Place.., Weather got this thing about bald men you do we have The Word, and Terry 5.30pm 8.10pm 10.35 This Morning. Popular mid- 10.05Good Morning With Anne 'git' Christian? The Specialist fpm 5,509m 8_20pm know. morning magazine programme And Nick Trapped In Paradise 3 15pm hosted by Judy Finnigan and Odeon - The Hesdrow 12.00News: Weather 12.05Pebble Mill Richard Madeley 10113.243 8230) 12.20 Calendar News: Weather Leon 1.50pm 5.20pm 820prn 12.55Regional News: Weather Shallow Grave 1.50pm 4.05prn 1.00 One O'Clock News: Weather 12.30 News: Weather 1.30 Neighbours. Katerina lends 1BBC2 1Ch4 4 6.20pm 8.400m i700 12.55 Coronation Street Stergate 1.45pn1 5.10pm 8.10pm Mark a sympathetic ear. Gaby I 1.25 Home and Away. Jack's bad The Road To MIMS& 1,45pm 5.25prn takes some time off with Kris 6.20 Open University; 8.00 News, 8.15 6.35 Sandokan; 7.00 The Big Breakfast; behaviour lands him in it up to his and everything conspires 6.15prn Westminster On-Line: 9.00 Schools; 2.00 9.00 You Bet Your Lite; 9.30 Schools: neck, when he falls hook, line and against the rock band's Only You 1 10pm 3.40pm 5.55pm The Greedysaurus Gang; 2.05 Spider. 12.00 House To House: 12.30 Sesame sinker for the girls' revenge plan 8.25prn rehersal. 2.10 Songs Of Praise. 2.45 Myths and Street. 1.30 Take Five: 2.00 Starlight 1.55 A Country Practice Hyde Park Cinema 1.50 Timekeepers Legends; 3.00 News: Westminster; 3.50 Brudenell Road, LS8 2.15 Alias Smith And Jones Serenaders; 2.15FILM: Mercy Or Murder 2.20 Masters Of Beauty Ready, (0113-275 2045) 3.05 Glynn Christian's News: 4.00 Today's the Day; 4.30 (1987). 4.00 Journeyman, 4.30 2.50 Shorthand Street Potnt Break 6.30prn Entertaining Microwave Steady, Cook; 5.00 Play 11 Again Countdown: 5.00 Reid Lake. I Love To 3.20 News 3.20 Brilliant Gardens Even Cowgliis Get The Blues 9pm 5.30 All In The Mind: Production Steal Men From Other Women, 5.50 3.30 Children's ITV: Alphabet Castle Cottage Road Cineme 3.30 Cartoon Workers v Newbold. Three 3.40 Wizadora 3.45 Sick As A Parrot Tenytoons; 6.00 The Crystal Maze Cottage Road. Far Headtrigiey teenagers from Newbold 3.50 Scooby Doo 4.00 Jackanory: The Fwog Pwince 7.00 Channel 4 News: Weather 0113-275 1608) Community School in Chesterfield 4.15 Reboot. A digital pirate ship attacks nlernew WO The Vampire The Twuthi 7.50 The Slot face three senior production Lounge Cinema 4.10 Potsworth And Co 8.00 Brookside. Further revelations Mainframe and captures Bob, Dot workers. North Lane. Headingtey 4.35 The Really Wild Show. Today abound leaving Mandy unable to and Enzo dunng an energy-sea the Really Wild team are In 6.00 Star Trek: The Next Generation. 0113-275 '608) talk to Rachel. Sarah Banks is set battle. All will be lost unless Dot can Shallow Grave Arizona. Michaels and Howie While investigating a massive dust use her business knowledge to to move - while Jimmy Corkhill is a Leeds University Jump Into the saddle and ride cloud which could cause an convince the greedy pirates there's wanted man. Rupert Beckett Lecture Theatre out into the desert, white Chris ecological disaster. an uninvited more profit in letting them go. Packman photographs coyotes 8.30 Travelog. Andy Kershaw's double LUU Fara Society present visitor appears on the bridge. He 4.40 The Tomorrow People. The gang My Seoutiful Laundrette 7pm EVE1 at dawn bill takes us from the East to the claims to be an historian from the accidentally lead Chester Toms to 5.00 Newaround West. In the first he travels to A new drama series future, but things soon start to go Beth Halliday. who has the 5.05 The Biz. Romania to report on how the theatre about the lives and loves of horribly wrong. Stamng Patrick technology to speed the growth of country has emerged from the children who attend the Stewart, Jonathan Frakes and Brent the seeds into pods. West Yorkshire Playhouse Markov School of Dance and Seiner. nightmares of the Ceaucesu regime 5.10 Home And Away Quarry Hill Mount, Leeds Drama. This episode 6.45 This Is Garth Brooks, Too. The and in the second. he heads for the 5.40 News: Weather (0113-244 2111) Introduces a group of young country and western crooner badlands of New Mexico. hol on the 5.55 Calendar: Weather The Winter Guest by Sharman hopefuls who are learning to performs some of his best ever hits. trail of the Wild West. MacDonald. directed by Alan Rickman cope with the cut-throat world 6.30 Crosswits 9.00 Dispatches. Each week Dispatches 7.45pm of showbiz. complete with impressive stage 7.00 Talking Telephone Numbers. This Getting On by Alan Bennett with 5.35 Neighbours effects that include pouring rain for presents a new riveting story that live entertainment show - hosted Timothy West, directed by Prunella 6.00 News: Weather Thunder Rolls' and flames for combines investigation, observation by Philip Schofield and Emma Scales 7.30prn 6.30 Look North Heil Stamper! 'Standing Outside the Fire', from the and ingenuity to report on what is Forbes - boasts the sizable cash Civic Thisbe 7.00 This Is Your Life Texas Stadium, Dallas. really going on both home and prize of up to £25,000. Cookridge Street, Leeds 7.30 Here And Now. Current affairs 7.30 The World At War. Another chance abroad. 7.30 Coronation Street. Fiona discovers Leeds Youth Opera present Delibes' magazine reporting on to see the acclaimed documentary 9.45 Out of Order. The issue tonight is Steve's secret Will it tear them Lainhe 7.1300m scandals. scares and success apart Tickets E6/E5JE4,13 stories from around the series about the Second World 'meat is murder'. But no sign 01 or bring them closer together? country. War. Morrisey, Jonny Marr, or any of the 8.00 The Match - Live. Liverpool v 4cilamiss; 8.00 How Do They Do That? How 8.30 University Challenge. Jeremy Smiths. However, we do get a Crystal Palace. Action from Anfield does Des Lynam gel away with Paxman introduces the quarter-final glimpse of a champion plastic shoe in this Coca-Cola Cup semi-final presenting this sort of middle- battle between Trinity College and wearer, dramatist G. F. Newman. first leg. The Reds will be gunning ot-the-road. boring twaddle? The Measure Room* St Andrews. But where the hell are 10.00 ER (Emergency Room): Going for a record-breaking fifth win. Answers on a postcard please LUU end LMIJ' Lower Manion Street Leeds 6.45 Points Of View Home. Its all happening down in against a Palace side which has Cifcuii 10orn-tam tt.13.50 9.00 News: Regional News: 9.00 FILM: Bare Essentials (1990). A the hectic emergency ward of a listed some great wins over holders Bar Basics Weather stressed-out New York couple head Aston Villa and Manchester City. Lower Memon Street, Leeds Chicago hospital. A mysterious 9.30 The Private Life of Plants. for the South Seas for a revitalising 10.00 News: Weather Higgy d Ralph Underground woman wanders the hospital halls. David Attenborough reaches holiday. But their relationship Is put 10.40 Street Legal The Underground the climax of his incredible singing, Dr Lewis is confronted over Cookndge Street. Leeds to the test when. shipwrecked on an 11.35 FILM: Project X (1987). Jimmy journey Into the world of her treatment of a heart patient and The Moth Club isolated island, they are confronted Garrett (Matthew Broderick) is a 8pm-tam E5,(E41E3 plants. Tonight he looks at the Uz continues her seduction of John. Rio's by a handsome American and a ingenious ways plants manage 11.00 The Best Of The Tube. rebellious military pilot working on a Memon Centre. Leeds beautiful native girl. With Mark Linn- Here's a to survive extreme ranges of top secret project who becomes Mystery City - glam rock chance to enjoy the best bits again. temperature, from freezing Baker, Lisa Hartman, Gregory enraged when cruel experiments tOpm-2am 12 entry Highlights include Terence Trent Arctic wastes to dry barren Harrison and Charlotte Lewis. are inflicted on the animals he Cafe Max D'Arby's TV debut and The Jam's deserts. David Attenborough 10.30 Newanlght. Comprehensive trains. He quickly becomes Gail Lane, Leeds last live performance on TV. reaches the climax does he? coverage of today's important attached to the group of Burlier-Soul,Swirld.HiPtinp 11.35 Moviewatch Music Factory Wahhey! national and international news chimpanzees in his care. When he 10.20Sportsnight Vicar Lane. Leeds stones. 12.05 LA Law: Do The Spike Thing learns from Virgil. an ape who has 11.40FILM: Cops And Robbers Flange - Garage, house. dance 11.15 The Late Show. Tracey MacLeod 1.00 Weird Nightmare learned sign language, the deadly John Dasilva (Hacienda) E3 NUS/E4 (1973).A six-parter David 2.05 FILM: Under Two Flags (1936). Attenborough epic about the presents the live arts and media fate awaiting the chimps, Jimmy Compelling drama in which Ronald private life of the police force. programme. plans to liberate his friends . music 1.10 Weather A man points at some 11,55 Weetherview Coleman plays an aristocratic 1.35 Hollywood Report: News clouds and talks about high 12.00 Endgame By Samuel Beckett Englishman hiding in the Foreign 2.05 Videofashion pressure ridges, a good clean, 1.35 The Record Legion for a crime committed by his 2.35 The Album Show City Of Leeds College of Music family show Unless Suzanne 2.00 Night School: Special Needs young brother. He meets a noble 3.35 Noisy Mothers Cookndge Street, Leeds Charlton's presenting II. 4.00 BBC Select Englishwoman and they fall In love. 4.30 Jobfinder 1.15 Close A Recital of Indian Music 7.30pro 4.15 Close 3.45 Close 5.30 News

LEEDS UNIVERSITY UNION'S Classes are free, but places are limited - book early to avoid disappointment. To book a place come up to the Exec SELF-DEFENCE CLASSES Office (on the 1st floor of the Union building).

Classes will start on Wednesday, 22nd FOR MEN AND WOMEN. February and will run weekly until the end of term. Wednesdays 2 - 3pm *0 film 1-BBC1 I thursday 16 pick of the day ITV v MGM Vicar Lane 6.00 Business Breakfast Quantum Leap EastEnders 6.00 GMTV (0113-245 25651 (6:00pm, BBC2) (7: 30pm, BBC1) StarTrak: Generations 12-3Opm 7.00 BBC Breaklasi News 9.25 Chain Letters Phworragh! Scott Bakula stars as a WS Ethel's 80th birthday, and she's 3.05pm 5.40pm 6.15prn 9.05 Kilroy 9.56 Calendar News: Weather weary time-traveller and does 10.00 News: Regional News: Weather going down Up 'ler Ronson with her Irrenview With The %/lunette 1.30pm something politically correct so he 10.00 The Time..- The Place... 5,30pm 8.10pm 10.05 Good Morning With Anne And new hat, a gram of whizz and half an can leap info next week. E. Allegedly. 10.35 This Homing The Specialist rpm 5 50prn 11.213prn Nick 12.20 Calendar News: Weather Trapped In Perackse 3.15prn 12.00 News: Regional News: Weather 12.30 News: Weather Odeon - The Heade** 12.05 Pebble Mill M113-24362301 12.55 Ernmardale Leon 1-50prn 5,20pre 820pm 12.55 Regional News: Weather 1.25 Horne and Away. Shane and Angel Shallow Grave I.50em 4.05ean 1.00 News: Weather 113BC2 ICh4 4 clash over their wedding plans. 6.20pm 8 40pm 1.30 Neighbours. With Anemise away POO 1.55 A Country Practice Stergete 1.45om 5.10pm 8.10sim will Mark be tempted to play? Cody 2.20 Vanessa The Road To Welk:dile 1 40prn 5.25prn takes the gauntlet thrown down by 6.20 Open University; 8.00 Breakfast 6.35 Sandokan, 7.00 The Big Breakfast; 250 Shortlend Street 8,15pm News; 8.15 Westminster On-Line With Rick's attitude problem. 9.00 You Bet Your Life; 9.30 Schools: 3.20 Newsws Only You I 10pm 3 400m 5.55pen Andrew Nell. 9.00 Schools; 2.00 &owl 1.50 Timekeepers 12.00 House To House. 12.30 Sesame 3.25 Calendar NewsiBilsdate: Network 8.25pm And Tidyup, 2.05 Puppydog Tales; 2.10 Street, 1.30 Wonderful Wizard Of Oz, 1.55 Hyde Par* Cinema 2.15 FILM: Caprice (1987). Cosmetics North Kangaroo Counting; Magoo's Glorious Brudenell Road. LSO designer Patricia Foster. played by Next with Marti Caine, 2.35 From the 3.30 Children's ITV: The Riddiers Edge; 3.00 News: Weather: Westminster Fourth; 2.15 FILM- Queen Bee (1955). (0113-275 2045) Doris Day, is arrested for selling 3.40 Wizadora Point Break 6 33pm with Nick Ross 3.55 From The Horse's Mouth: Boss; 4.30 industrial secrets. She becomes a 3.50 Rupert. The lovable bear gels up to My Own Private 'Idaho 9pm Countdown; 5.00 Ricki Lake; 5.50 pawn in a battle of rival companies 3.50 News: Weather: Regional News: more animated adventures. Cartage Read Cinema Weather Terrytoons; 6.00 The Cosby Show; 6.30 and it soon becomes clear that no- 4.15 Mike And Angelo Cottage Road, Far Headingley Saved By The Bell; 7.00 News: Weather one is quite what they appear to be. 4.00 Today's the Day 4.40 Fun House. Grunge galore with Pat {0113175 1606) 7.50 The Slot Interview Wee The Vampire 3.50 Jackanory Annual 4.30 The Victorian Kitchen: Picnics Sharp and two hopeful teams. 8.00 The Number 10 Show. In the world Lounge Cinema 4.00 Robinson Sucroe 5.00 Play It Again competing in action-packed games North Lane. Heedingley 4.25 Animal Hospital Week 5.30 Catchword of fantasy politics former prostitute June Taylor presents her view of a and general knowledge rounds to 03113.275 t6061 4.35 Mud 6.00 Quantum Leap. Time-traveller Sam win big prizes in the Fun House. Shallow Grave 5.00 Newsround Beckett falls back to 1970 as a new Britain. 8.30 The Pulse. With more than six 5.10 Home And Away 5.10 Blue Peter native-American Indian struggling to million people in the UK covered by 5.40 News: Weather thecatrft 5.35 Neighbours help his grandfather return to a private medical insurance. Shahnaz 5.55 Calendar/Network North: Weather 6.00 News reservation where he can die with Pakravan looks at the policies on 6.30 Crosswits West Yoricatere Playhouse 6.30 Regional News Magazines traditional dignity. offer and an independent financial 7.00 Emmerdale. Seth and Vic are Quarry Hill Mount, Leeds 7.00 Top Of The Pops 6.45 They Who Dare. Tonight's adviser explains the problems and brewing up trouble in the woods, {0113-244 21111 7.30 EastEnders. Ethel's 80th birthday programme looks at Maurizio pitfalls when choosing a policy. while the McAlltsters bid the village The Winter Guest by Sherman celebrations in the Queen Vic cause 'Menolo' Zanolla, a living legend in 9.00 Robbie Coltrane Special. Robbie farewell. MacDonald, directed by Alan Rickman some chaos and confusion. Pauline 7.4.6pm the world of free climbing. In the wraps his tongue around a variety 7.30 3-0. New series of the issues has mixed feelings about Michelle. Getting On by Alan Bennett, with past 15 years he has made many of accents and Characters in magazine, which kicks ott with a and Ricky gets caught in the act_ Timothy West. directed by Prunetle seemingly impossible ascents, sketches, monologues and musical profile of Tina Kennedy, whose 8.00 Animal Hospital Week. Roil Harris Scales 7 30pm including a climb up the southern numbers in this one-hour special. young son has cerebral palsy. She Clete Theatre and Steve Knight catch up with the face of the Marmotada in the Italian Highlights include luckless band believes it would have been better if Cookndge Street, Leeds action at the busy 24-hour RSPCA Dolomites. Robbie Wilson and Edgar he had not been allowed to live, but Leeds Youth Opera present Deena' Hamswolt Hospital for sick 7.00 Waiting for God. Diana barracks a Duscarten taking us back to the doctors denied her that choice. tatuve 7.30vn animals in Holloway, North London. Tickets ErtifE5E4)E3 certain Counsellor Ferguson who is black-arid-while days of Scotland 8.00 The Bill. Deakin finds he is so (11.11 8.30 Down to Earth. With Richard Briars trying unsuccessfully to win the Yard of depth In the world of computers and Kirsten Cooke. With the garden OAP vole. 10.00 Hearts And Minds, This hard- that he has to get a schoolboy to clubs finished. Tony says goodbye to 7.30 Regional Programmes hating drama tells the everyday help him solve a case. Helen. Tony wants to do something 8.00 A Taking Liberties Special. A story of mayhem and madness in Can Roger's with his new-iound expertise - and 8.30 Outside Edge. chilling investigation into how for an inner city Liverpool captaincy survive the EGM1 As the Bar Brute fancies the idea of building a years the army ignored the plight of comprehensive_ Teacher Drew Lower Mammon Street, Leeds barbecue for Chris and Molly by vote is cast. Shirley provides an the psychiatric casualties of the MacKenzie simply wants to put a - tens Wright - garage way of a thank-you. unexpected - but entertaining Free Entry Falklands War. little poetry into his students lives diversion. 9.00 News: Regional News: Weather The Pleasure Room* 8.30 Top Gear and finds the other leachers are the 9.00 99-1. Commander Stone is stilt 9.30 Crlmewatch UK. Nick Ross and Lower Merrlon Sheet, Laerlii 9.00 The X Files. A supernatural killer ones who are the threat. seemingly pleased with Raynor's Funk, Sue Cook learn up with the forces The Mite High Cab - 7cis• disc°, whom Mulder helped imprison is 11.05 Adult Oprah: Gay Men Who Only choice, but how honest are his acid eszl of law and order to try and solve released. and begins a deadly Date Married Men. Oprah Winfrey motives? The Hug Club - retro house crimes with viewers' help. Can you hosts the show with a panel of gay game of cat and mouse. The game 10.00 News: Weather tOpm-tam E3it3_50 PikePints £1 help them identify a man wanted for men whose partners won't be there Leads University Union is all the more deadly as the killer 10.30 Calendar News: Weather questioning over the case of a because they're married_ According Harvey me, Bee eats human livers, hibernates for up 10.40 Edit V teenager who was abducted and to surveys there are two million The Thursday Sop - lndieipoprettseelro to thirty years and can elongate his 11.25 Prisoner Cell Block H, followed by sexually assaulted. married couples in America where Doubles e1 LageriGtneeCider £1 body to escape detection. All of News 10.15 Question Time one partner is having a gay etins-2are Free entry 12.20 FiLM: Night Walk (1989) Planet Earth/Paparazzi Bar 11.15 Crimewatch UK Update which adds up to an extremely extramarital affair. tricky situation. 2.05 America's Top Ten City Square, Leeds 11.25 Cagney and Lacey. Hurrah for 11.55 Bullpen: My Name Is Hard B My 2.35 Cinema, Cinema, Cinema Does Yer Me KAI* Wham You Ara?' flicked retro 80s hair-dos. The 9.45 Situations Vacant, followed by name isn't Hard B. my parents are 3.05 FILM: True As A Turtle (1957). A Adlnr5Ddri, E2 plus free bathe of cider tough-cookie cops battle their way Video Nation Shorts quite sensible like that. The Warehouse honeymooning couple find through another gritty situation in a 10.30 Newsnight 1225 Dispatches Somers Street. Leeds themselves In deep water when run-down part of Noo-York. 11,15 Late Review. Mark Lawson casts a 1.15 The Arlo Guthrie Show The Slow Club , on two floors their holiday on a yacht in the south 12.15 Spirit Of Islam sardonic eye over the cultural 2.15 FiLM: Hi, Nellie (1934). Amusing Upstairs - Jazz, Blues of France does not run as smoothly Downstairs - Funk. Rate Groove 12.35 FILM: Pals (1987). Comedy highlights of the past seven days. drama about the managing editor of as planned. The motley crew of the e3'£3-60 toemeam starring George C Scott and Don with guests Tony Parsons and a big-city newspaper. A series of 'Turtle' are hit by a bout of German Lager/Jack Daniels £1 Ameche as two World War II Allison Pearson. events result in his taking over the The Underground buddies whose lives are turned 11.55 Weathervlew paper's "Hears Throbs- column - measles, which leads to the Cooker:lee Street, Leeds upside down when they discover a 12.00 Open View whether he like 11 or not! Stars Paul honeymooners steeping in separate Gass Latina 12.05 The Chemistry Of Creation Muni. rooms. Stars John Gragson. Latin, Salsa, Mambo suitcase containing $3 million in the track of an abandoned car. 12.30 The Record 4.00 Schools 4.40 Jobfinder 2.05 Weather; 2.10 Close 12.55 Close 5.15 Close 5.30 News

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