1 Donkey Kong (Cartoon) Version 1.4 By Cataquack Warrior Welcome to the Donkey Kong Country series. Join us as Donkey Kong fights to defend Kongo Bongo Island and the wish-granting Crystal Coconut… Oh, you’re saying that the island’s called DK Island, and that you know nothing about a coconut? Well, that’s because this isn’t the games we’re talking about, unfortunately. No, this is the TV series, your usual sort of Saturday morning cartoon based on the video games, somewhat at least. The basic plot involves Donkey Kong, the prophesied future ruler of the island, trying to protect the Crystal Coconut from villains like King K. Rool, who leads the “lizards” and plots various schemes, and Kaptain Skurvy, who wants to take back the Crystal Coconut in the name of his great-great-great grandpappy (who apparently stole the Crystal Coconut long ago and buried it on Kongo Bongo Island). Being rather simple-minded, and having mostly unreliable jerks for friends, DK is constantly messing things up and letting the Crystal Coconut get stolen (or even getting it lost himself). Fortunately, the villains aren’t too bright either, so things generally work out. And since the main struggle centers on the Coconut alone, it’s not like the Apes or Lizards are constantly fighting each other. Basically, the sort of schemes and problems are Saturday cartoon style, so while they won’t be the most dangerous it doesn’t make them any less annoying. You’re stuck here for 10 years, so hang in there and try not to get driven crazy by all the stupidity. You have +1000 Crystal Coconut Points (CCP) to spend. 2 Location Roll a 1d10 or pay 50 CCP to pick your starting location. Not that it matters that much – there’s only so much space on the island, after all. 1. DK’s House- A small little pad that Donkey Kong has in a sandy plot on the island with some baobab trees growing here and there (his house is built on one, for starters). 2. Funky’s Flights- Funky’s chandelier-like habitation is right next to a boardwalk and dock on the beach – the perfect place for him to launch his plane and catch some surfing waves. 3. Cranky’s Cabin- A house high up in the tree tops, with a set of trapped bridges linking the way to the cabin. Inside, Cranky keeps all of his various books, as well as the Crystal Coconut. 4. Jungle Undergrowth- We’ve gone from the tops of the trees all the way down to the forest floor. You are in the midst of Kong Bongo’s many towering trees, so you can either walk along the ground or take to the vines. 5. Banana Plantation- With acres of nothing but banana trees as far as the eye can see, this is where most of the island’s bananas are grown. Who owns and runs this place? Don’t ask me – it never got explained in the script. 6. White Mountains- A snowy and cold area up in the mountains. Nobody really lives here except for the temperamental Eddie the Mean Old Yeti. 7. Bluster Barrel Works- Owned by the vain and wimpy Bluster, this factory produces all of the island’s various barrels – a much needed commodity, indeed. 8. K. Rool’s Factory- Well, it’s more of just a secret lair than a factory; all of the factory stuff was too expensive for the show, so it’s all backstage. Hopefully the king doesn’t mind you dropping in. 3 9. Temple of Inka Dinka Doo- A mysterious stone temple dedicated to the enigmatic idol Inka Dinka Doo. If you wish, you can appeal to him for words of wisdom; whether he offers any words, much less sensible ones, is another matter entirely. 10. The Mines- These mine cart tracks and tunnels run all through the island. With that in mind, this choice is basically a free choice: pick from any of the options above. 4 Species So, what kind of creature are you? Pay 50 CCP to determine your gender; otherwise, you have the same gender that you had before the jump. Drop-In- You come as you were from before the jump. You have no memories of life here, and maybe that’s good – it puts you ahead of the idiots here. Your form is whatever form you had before the jump. Ape- The “Kongs”, essentially. Whether you’re a hairy ape or a hairy monkey, you love bananas. Lizard- The scaly cronies who follow King K. Rool. Though, really, they’re more like crocodiles than lizards. 5 Job Also, you might want to get a job while you’re here. There are some different openings where you could find work. Elder- A retired coot, you are respected for your great wisdom, and feared for your short fuse. Business Owner- You’re a successful businessman or woman with a booming industry on the island. There’s not much on the island, though, so that’s not saying much. Soldier- A proud and loyal soldier fighting the good fight…though not necessarily on the side of good. Mastermind- You are a budding villain with the potential to go down in the history books as a great evil mastermind. If only you could get your schemes to work… Pirate- Lyin', lootin', stealin’, that’s the reason you’re a pirate. You sailed in from the sea to search for and snatch treasure on the island. 6 Perks There’s got to be something worth putting up with this nonsense for a decade, right? Well, with all the crazy shit going on, there’s definitely some unusual abilities you can acquire. Lip (Un) Sync (100 CCP, Free Drop-In)- You speak, and your lips move, but your lips and your words don’t quite match. With the perk, you can selectively speak intelligibly without needing to move your mouth in the right way (or at all). The perk also makes it so that you have a good and compelling singing voice, even if the subject of your song is utterly ridiculous. Not an Idiot (200 CCP, Discount Drop-In)- It seems that everyone on the island is carrying an idiot ball, with the Crystal Coconut being the biggest idiot ball of them all. You, on the other hand, come from a not-so-stupid place, so you aren’t as easily led in circles. You get hunches on how to avoid potential trouble, and you are less likely to fall victim to stupid assumptions/tricks. Plus, you can at least get idiots to reasonably listen to your viewpoint instead of not paying attention in the slightest. Best of Enemies (300 CCP, Discount Drop-In)- Isn’t it a shame when old friends break up and become enemies? You can come up with foolproof plans to get any people who used to be friends with each other to settle their differences and come back together like in the good old days. However, the perk does not prevent them from splitting up again if they come to blows once more. Plus, keep in mind that you have no control over the ramifications of their friendship: bringing together two people who used to be infamous troublemakers back together could lead to them resuming their reckless streak, and bringing back together a villain and a hero could lead to the villain reforming but it could also lead to the hero deciding to help out the villain’s plans. From Here to There, No Stops (400 CCP, Discount Drop-In)- It seems like everyone in this show is moving from one place to another, and they just show up at their destination with no one even aware that they were coming. You can now travel from Point A to Point B without anyone at your destination noticing that you are on the move towards them until you arrive. The perk is less effective if people are actively out there looking for you or other intruders, but the perk still makes people less worried that someone is going to attack them until you’re at their doorstep, so to speak. Future Ruler of Future Rulers (600 CCP, Discount Drop-In)- This perk essentially nominates you as an eligible “future ruler” for any place you reside in for an extended period and take positive actions to help/protect. It doesn’t guarantee that you’ll be made ruler someday, but it 7 does at least put you on the waiting list, and if you work hard enough to meet the requirements you might be able to get the actual rulership sooner than later. Plus, even being a “future ruler” instead of a here-and-now ruler is still a great honor, and people will give you more respect as long as you live up to their expectations as their future ruler. Up in the Trees (100 CCP, Free Ape)- If there’s one place apes and monkeys feel at home, it’s up in the treetops. You are able to swiftly climb up things and travel between trees, faster than you could normally move about on the ground; you can also utilize similar things such as chains, lamp poles, etc. This also lets you take people by surprise by seemingly coming straight down from the sky to attack. Primate Potassium (200 CCP, Discount Ape)- Apes and monkeys just love their bananas. In addition to the normal nutritional benefits of bananas, you gain increased vitality by consuming bananas, such that your health and strength will be restored and enhanced.