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MAD's Al Jaffee SPEWS

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MAD's Al Jaffee SPEWS fe IS tori V6S \ VV3'^*T' WE'RE MAKING A SIGNET BOOK AN EXCITING MADs COMEBACK! -Al ©)axfee Spews Out IN FACT, WE'RE MAKING A SNAPPY ANSWERS TO WHOLE BOOK OF THEM -AS- STUPID QUESTIONSIt's about moronic I I questions like that MAD'S I /£-t one... and clever I answers like these: It's about 7 inches . tall, 4 inches wide Al Jaffee and 192 pages thick It's about the most , ridiculous idea for SPEWS OUT Na book ever conceived! It's about time that ' idiot out there ) stopped reading this "Snappy cover and bought it. Answers To Stupid Questions" ON SALE AT YOUR FAVORITE BOOKSTAND — OR YOURS BY MAIL use coupon or duplicate ..... NAME- A i\m ADDRESS. 485 MAD is on Avenue CITY New York, N.Y. STATE Zip-Code. 10022 ABSOLUTELY NECESSARYI PLEASE SEND ME: ALSO PLEASE SEND ME THE BOOKS CHECKED BELOW: MAD's • The MAD Reader p The MAD Frontier Questionable MAD • MAD Strikes Back P MAD in Orbit Howling MAD Snappy Answers p Inside MAD P The Voodoo MAD DON MARTIN Steps Out • Utterly MAD p Greasy MAD Stuff DON MARTIN Bounces Back To P The Brothers MAD P Three Ring MAD DON MARTIN Drops 13 Stories Stupid Questions P The Bedside MAD P Self-Made MAD MAD's Captain Klutz • Son of MAD P The MAD Sampler DAVE BERG Looks At The U.S.A. P The Organization MAD p World, World, etc. MAD DAVE BERG Looks At People P Like MAD p Raving MAD DAVE BERG Looks At Things • p The Ides of MAD P Boiling MAD The All-New SPY vs. SPY We cannot be responsible for cash P Fighting MAD D A MAD Look at Old Movies lost or stolen in the Mails. Check or Money Order preferred! On orders outside the U.S.A. be I ENCLOSE 50c FOR EACH sure to add 10% extra. Allow at Plus 25c Postage & Packaging on all orders under $2.00 least six weeks for delivery. NUMBER 118 APRIL 1968 VITAL FEATURES "IN THE 'Live within your income and you'll live without worry OUT EXIT" —and other things."—Alfred E. Neuman (A MAD MOVIE SATIRE) Pg.4 WILLIAM M. GAINES publisher ALBERT B. FELDSTEIN editor JOHN PUTNAM art director LEONARD BRENNER production JERRY De FUCCIO, NICK MEGLIN associate editors JACK ALBERT lawsuits GLORIA ORLANDO, CELIA MORELLI, JOAN ZECCA, A MAD CURTIS ANDERSON, IVAN LODICHAND subscriptions LOOK AT CONTRIBUTING ARTISTS AND WRITERS PRO the usual gang of idiots FOOTBALL Pg.11 DEPARTMENTS BELLE, BOOK AND VANDALS DEPARTMENT MAD In The Out Exit 4 VALENTINES BERG'S-EYE-VIEW DEPARTMENT TO The Lighter Side Of Fear 20 CELEBRITIES Pg.24 CITY'S LIMIT DEPARTMENT The Advantages Of The Suburbs For Kids 34 DON MARTIN DEPARTMENT Don Martin Looks At Frogs 14 The New Back-Scratcher 48 HEART-BURNS DEPARTMENT MAD Valentines To Celebrities 24 "MISSION JOKE AND DAGGER DEPARTMENT RIDICULOUS" Spy vs. Spy 37 if T" (A MAD TV LETTERS DEPARTMENT SATIRE) Random Samplings Of Reader Mail 2 Pg.27 MARGINAL THINKING DEPARTMENT Drawn-Out Dramas by Sergio Aragones ** & PASSING THE BUCK DEPARTMENT Pro Football 11 PUT YOUR FUNNY WHERE YOUR MOUTH IS DEPARTMENT MAD's Snappy Answers To Stupid Questions 38 ADVANTAGES THE FAULT IS IN OUR STARS DEPARTMENT OF THE TV Shows . Recast 18 SUBURBS TO SCHEME THE IMPOSSIBLE SCHEME DEPARTMENT FOR KIDS Mission Ridiculous 27 Pg.34 TURN ON, TUNE IN, DROP DEAD DEPARTMENT Hippie Magazine 41 **Various Places Around The Magazine "HIPPIE MAGAZINE" MAD—April 1968 Vol. 1, No. 118 is published monthly except February, May, August and November, (A MAD SATIRE by E. C. Publications, Inc., 485 MADison Avenue, New York, N. Y. 10022. Second Class Postage paid at New York, N. Y. Subscriptions: In the U.S.A., 19 issues $5.00. Outside U.S.A., 19 issues $6.25. Allow PUBLICATION) 10 weeks for change of address to become effective. Entire contents copyright © 1968 by E. C. Publica­ Pg.41 tions, Inc. The Publisher and Editors will not be responsible for unsolicited manuscripts and request all manuscripts be accompanied by a stomped self-addressed return envelope. The names of characters used in all MAD fiction and semi-fiction are fictitious. A similarity without satiric purpose to a living person is a coincidence. Printed in U.S.A. LETTERS DEPT. GREAT MOMENTS IN POLITICS MISSION: PREDICTABLE "MAD's Great Moments In Politics" got right to the heart of the matter. I am forwarding a copy to the White House. Jerry Jacobs Skokie, 111. "MAD's Great Moments in Politics" was something else! NEW POSTURE? David Roop Until recently, I regarded MAD as a Decatur, Ala. funny but somewhat worthless publica­ tion. You seemed to be avoiding the There is a subtle perversion of the issues of importance . which would conscience in this nation which can allow shock the reading public and result in itself to laugh at "humorous" references controversy. However, I happily detect a to the war in Vietnam. It is this sort of trend in the last few issues that disproves attitude which has degraded the issue to my theory. No matter what criticism you incidental, cocktail-party discussion. Your Apparently some TV series are par­ get for your new posture, and you are satire, in this case, eludes me. sure to get quite a bit, I hope you will ticularly susceptible to the renowned Brad Parks "MAD Treatment." We enjoy such take- continue your crusade and fully play your East Lansing, Mich. role in the construction of a better Amer­ offs immensely, but regard it as a mark ican society. of distinction that you've never given our Perhaps it is this sort of attitude that Beau- series, "Mission: Impossible", a satirical John Javna marchais referred to in "The Barber of hosing. Can it be that you've laid off be­ Hackley School Seville" when he wrote: "I hasten to laugh cause our writers afford us sensible plots? Tarrytown, N. Y. at everything for fear of being obliged to You might call this inquiry "Mission: PROMINENT EDUCATOR? weep!"—Ed. Curious" on our parts. In a recent mid-term examination in an Martin Landau Education course, I asked my students to TIMOTHY LEARY'S WALLET Barbara Bain identify certain prominent educators. 1 I just finished your article on "Dr. Hollywood, Calif. was distressed when only 27 out of 36 Tim" and thought it was great. I showed correctly identified Alfred E. Neuman. it to my fellow band members (We spe­ No, we've laid off because our writers The nine dummies have been screened cialize in "trip" music) and they thought haven't afforded us inane-enough plots. out of the Teacher-Education program on it was great, too. Incidentally, the mem­ Until now! See page 27 of this issue!—Ed. the grounds that they probably wouldn't bers of my band belong to a movement know what the kids were reading behind known as "Happies". Unlike Hippies, THE JOE NASTY SHOW their history books. Happies believe in "work" as well as fun. I thought your satire, "The Joe Nasty John H. Sandberg Gotta stay alive, y'know! Show", was quite unfair to TV stars like Director, Teacher-Education Lenny Dawson Joe Pyne and Alan Burke who are, in my Carnegie-Mellon University "The Whistling Rabbis" opinion, lovable fellows. And anyone Pittsburgh, Pa. Cincinnati, Ohio who disagrees is a dirty Commie! Jerry Coraz "THE DOODLETOWN PIPERS" GO MAD AGAIN Indianapolis, Ind. During a break in rehearsals, while MAD readers can see us on "The Red appearing with Nancy Wilson at the Sa­ Skelton Show" (Jan. 9th CBS-TV), with Thanks for striking a blow against hara Hotel in Las Vegas, "The Doodle- Carl Reiner on "The Fabulous Funnies" opinionated no-minds. town Pipers" staged a "love-in" with (Feb. 11th NBC-TV), and on "The Ed Wynne Taylor MAD. My musical director, George Wil- North Carolina State kins, and I find that MAD is the best Sullivan Show;' (Apr. 28th CBS-TV). Ward Ellis, Direction & Staging form of relaxation for the kids during "The Joe Nasty Show" was the fun­ their grueling sixteen-hour days. Other "The Doodletown Pipers" niest article you have ever printed. I Van Nuys, California laughed so hard, my father had to threat­ The Doodletown Pipers Stage a ,lLove-ln" with MAD en me in order to make me stop. David Gross Chicago, 111. I would like to commend you on your satire, "The Joe Nasty Show", but I can't. Because I can't stop laughing. Alan Thompson West Seneca, N. Y. Maybe we should introduce you to David Gross's father!—Ed. "Joe Nasty" is one of your all-time great satires. I sat and laughed over it for an hour and still chuckle when I think of it. These sadistic shows seen on TV arc- altogether revolting and have long de­ served your critical attack. Congratula­ tions! Kevin Gunn Lawrence, Kansas DIRTIER BY THE DOZEN FOR JUST A LITTLE FOLDING I consider "The Dirty Dozen" to be about the most sadistic, immoral (ethical, not sexual), and violence-ridden film I have ever seen, and to be utterly without YOU DON'T MONEY redeeming social value. In making this film, the producers showed not only poor taste and judgment, but also violent anti- HAVE TO Americanism. Our enemies abroad could not possibly have produced a better prop­ aganda tool to show how evil and im­ moral the U.S. Army and American fight­ FISH ing men are. I am a liberal and believe in criticizing our faults, but this movie went much too far.
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