The Middle School Scene Book Copyright © 2010 Lindsay Price

Prepared Exclusively For: Marisa Peck

All Scenes From Published Plays!

Th e Mi d d l e Sc h o o l Sc e n e Bo o k

EDITED BY Lindsay Price

Theatrefolk Original Playscripts

DO NOT COPY :: Copyrighted Material for perusal purposes. Licensed for one printed copy, personal use. Public performances subject to royalty. See http://www.theatrefolk.com/products/161 for pricing and ordering. Prepared Exclusively For: Marisa Peck

All CAUTION: This play is fully protected under the copyright laws Scenes of Canada and all other countries of the Universal Copyright From Convention and is subject to royalty. Changes to the script are Published expressly forbidden without written consent of the author. Rights Plays! to produce, film, or record, in whole or in part, in any medium or in any language, by any group amateur or professional, are fully reserved. Interested persons are requested to apply for amateur rights to: Th e Mi d d l e Sc h o o l Theatrefolk PO Box 1064 Sc e n e Bo o k Crystal Beach, ON, L0S 1B0 Canada Tel 1-866-245-9138 Fax 1-877-245-9138 e-mail: [email protected] website: www.theatrefolk.com Those interested in professional rights may contact the author c/o the above address. No part of this script covered by the copyrights hereon may be reproduced or used in any form or by any means – graphic, electronic or mechanical – without the prior written permission of the author. Any request for photocopying, recording, or taping shall be directed in writing to the author at the address above. Printed in the USA EDITED BY ISBN 978-1-926533-20-9 Lindsay Price

Theatrefolk Original Playscripts

Characters...... Pl a y ...... Page Two Girls

Ramona and Jenny...... Th e Sn o w Sh o w ...... 5 Meredith and Madame Zoobenka...... Wa i t Wa i t Bo Ba i t ...... 12 Jan and Tara...... Te n /Tw o ...... 17 Jane and The Woman Who Walks...... Je a l o u s y Ja n e ...... 24 Agatha and Eunice...... Ag a t h a Re x ...... 28 Ashley and Jane...... Am o n g Fr i e n d s a n d Cl u tt e r ...... 32 One Girl and One Guy

Beatrice and Benedick...... Mu c h Ad o Hi g h Sc h o o l ...... 36 One and Two...... Te n /Tw o ...... 40 Todd and Stacey...... Ha i rb a l l ...... 45 Pete and Nicky...... Wa i t Wa i t Bo Ba i t (MS Ve rs i o n )...... 52 Nicola and Rick...... Fo o tb a l l Ro m e o ...... 56  Dunno and Fine...... Ti c k Ta l k ...... 63 Two Guys

Johan and Hans...... De c k Th e St a g e ...... 69 Steve and Edgar...... Wa i t Wa i t Bo Ba i t ...... 75 Sam and Pat...... Sc h o o l Da z e ...... 78 Marty and Edwin...... Sc h o o l Da z e ...... 82 Scenes for Group Scenes

Catherine, Cosette, Julian...... Be a u t y a n d t h e Be e ...... 86 Drift, Blue, Ice...... Th e Sn o w Sh o w ...... 91 Nicola et al...... Fo o tb a l l Ro m e o ...... 96 Monica et al...... Od d b a l l ...... 100 Two Girls Appendix Hints and Tips on Competing with Scenes...... 1 1 0 

All plays by Lindsay Price & Published by Theatrefolk

Ramona and Jenny Ramona and Jenny

PLAY: The Snow Show RAMONA: No talking! Now, we scan the skies. (she looks up)

GENRE: Comedy JENNY: Ramona. TIME: 4:30 RAMONA: If you’re talking, you’ll miss it and everything will be  ruined.

DESCRIPTION JENNY: (looking at RAMONA) You’re exaggerating. Two friends perform a ritual to make their wishes come true. Though they’ve been doing it for years, only one of the girls truly believes in the ritual RAMONA: Don’t look at me. Look up. anymore. JENNY: But - ACTING HINTS RAMONA: Up, up, up! Ramona is obsessed with catching the first snowflake. She won’t listen to reason. She is so rigid, she comes off as a little crazy. How would this reflect JENNY: Ok. how she talks? Or stands? Jenny is trying to find a happy medium. She wants to support Ramona, yet They both look up. There is a pause. have nothing to do with the ritual. Her mind is in a tug-of-war. Show that tug- of-war physically. JENNY: Ramona. We’re sixteen. We’re not kids. Drew didn’t There is a big twist in the middle of the scene where suddenly Ramona doesn’t come today. Or Natalie. Or Madoka. Or Lynn. (Pause. JENNY seem so crazy and Jenny becomes supportive. Be clear with the change. Both unleashes.) I could have had a date today Mona. Sam Stevens girls behave differently before and after the twist. asked me to go to the movies and I really wanted to go and  I’m a terrible liar and he was smiling when I told him about this but it was a thin sickly smile like the smile you give your RAMONA and JENNY are doing tongue exercises, grandmother when she pinches your cheeks after the seven sticking their tongue far out and then bringing it hundredth time. (she takes a breath) And Sam had a look in back in. his eye, a “she’s crazy” look and boy am I glad she said she couldn’t go ’cause now I can ask Patti Palatino instead and I’ll RAMONA: Tongue out. Tongue in. Tongue out. Tongue in. Tongue fall in love with her and take her to prom and we’ll backpack out. across Europe and I’ll propose to her under the Eiffel tower JENNY: (with her tongue out) This is stupid. and we’ll live happily ever after. Ramona look at me!

RAMONA: (with her tongue out) No talking! Tongue in. Tongue out, RAMONA turns slowly to JENNY. hold, hold, hold… tongue in. Ok. Shake it out. (she shakes her RAMONA: (slowly, firmly) Remember the burrito. tongue out.) She turns back and continues scanning the sky. JENNY: Ramona… JENNY sighs.

Ramona and Jenny Ramona and Jenny

JENNY: I know. I know. I know about the burrito. RAMONA: Our heads thrown back, our arms open wide, tongues out. RAMONA: (still looking up) Drew does not remember the burrito. Natalie does not remember the burrito. JENNY: And we all made the same wish on the first snowflake.

JENNY: I remember! I’m here, aren’t I? RAMONA: And what did we wish for?

RAMONA: Madoka and Lynn do not remember the burrito. JENNY: (with a sigh) Burritos.

JENNY: We’re not kids anymore. RAMONA: And what did we have for dinner?

RAMONA: We were though. We were seven years old. (she poses) JENNY: Burritos. It was the first day of winter. RAMONA: And did we know we were having burritos? JENNY: (looking at RAMONA) Ramona, I know the story. I was there. JENNY: It could have been a coincidence, it - RAMONA: Eyes up! I am telling the tale. RAMONA: And did we know we were having burritos? JENNY: (looking up) What if Sam Stevens really does marry Patti Palatino? Where will I be then? JENNY: No.

RAMONA: It was the first day of winter. We were seven years old. RAMONA: And did we not make a pact, a double-spit high-hand shoulder-slap double-hip pact to come together during the JENNY: (she’s heard this many times before) It was Natalie’s birthday first snowfall on the first day of winter to catch the first sleepover party. snowflake?

RAMONA: And we ran outside to catch the first snowflake of the JENNY: Mona, I don’t spit anymore. It’s gross. first snowfall on the first day of winter. RAMONA shoves JENNY. JENNY: And when you catch the first snowflake of the first snowfall, on the first day of winter… RAMONA: Non believers!!! All of you! We caught the first snowflake and that wish came true and we wished for burritos! RAMONA: …any wish you make will come true. Burritos. We could have had money, fame, guys, health, happiness! It happened once, it has to happen again. But you, JENNY: And we stood in Natalie’s backyard. you needers of your instant gratification, you drowning in your RAMONA: Ramona, Jenny, Drew, Madoka, Lynn, and Natalie. lack of faith, you dropping out one by one by one,

JENNY: Best friends till the end. JENNY: Did you just add guys to the list?

Ramona and Jenny Ramona and Jenny

RAMONA: (carrying on) You couldn’t wait. I know it wasn’t a burrito RAMONA: Eyes up, eyes up! coincidence. It was worlds colliding to create a magical wish euphoria! The first day of winter, the first snowfall, the first JENNY: Do you know what colour? snowflake; it can’t be a one time thing. It can’t, it just - RAMONA: No talking!

JENNY: Do you want a boyfriend, Ramona? JENNY: I think Taylor Levine likes you.

RAMONA: (stopped in her tracks) What? RAMONA: Remember the burrito or go away. I can do this on my JENNY: Well, I’ve been hearing this first snowflake wish euphoria own if I have to. speech for years now: money, fame, health, happiness, and JENNY: I’m not going anywhere. (pumping a fist into the air) Burrito now… guys? forever! Viva Burrito!

RAMONA: So? Maybe I’m changing things up. I am human, you RAMONA: Well. That’s excessive. know. I’m not a robot. What do you want? There’s a pause. They’re both looking up. RAMONA JENNY: (amazed) Ramona St. Pierre. has a fierce look of concentration. JENNY is grinning RAMONA: Oh shut up. like an idiot. RAMONA does not look at JENNY and speaks very quickly. JENNY: You’re looking for a date. RAMONA: Silver satin empire with a beaded bodice and a bow on RAMONA: What? So. So what? It’s nothing. Don’t be ridiculous. the back. If you’re asking. And Taylor Levine is very cute. (pause) I was looking at prom dresses. JENNY: I didn’t say anything. JENNY: (gleeful) Ramona St. Pierre! RAMONA: Good. RAMONA: Shut up! JENNY: Silver would look good on you. JENNY: You’re a girl! You want to go to prom! RAMONA: I thought you weren’t saying anything. RAMONA: (staring up) Don’t be ridiculous. Of course I’m a girl. JENNY: I can talk to Taylor in English if you want. (she sees something JENNY: This is a happy day. in the sky)

RAMONA: I’m not talking about this anymore. We’ll miss the first RAMONA: Burrito Jenny, Burrito! snowflake and it’ll be all your fault. JENNY: Ramona, look! JENNY: Do you like mermaid or A-line? RAMONA: No talking!

Ramona and Jenny Meredith and Madame Zoobenka

JENNY: Look at the sky. At the clouds. That’s a snow sky. PLAY: Wait Wait Bo Bait

RAMONA: What? GENRE: Comedy TIME: 3:30 JENNY: That’s a snow sky. It’s going to snow. The first snowflake of the first snowfall on the first day of winter. This is it! 

RAMONA: Holy cow. DESCRIPTION The setting is a fortune teller’s salon. Meredith is determined to get the JENNY: (grabbing RAMONA’s hand) I’m wishing for you Ramona. answer to a very important question. RAMONA: I need all the help I can get. Head back. Tongue out. ACTING HINTS

JENNY & RAMONA: (with tongues out) Burrito, Burrito, Burrito! Both characters are fakes to a certain degree. Madame Zoobenka fakes an accent (and perhaps her fortunes) and Meredith has a “fake” relationship  while unrealistically waiting for the man of her dreams. Show both sides of the characters in the scene: their fake personas, and what lies beneath. Is this the first time Meredith has gone to a fortune teller? Think about who your ideal man is. Would you wait for a fantasy or are you more realistic?  MEREDITH enters slowly.

MADAME ZOOBENKA: (using an Eastern European accent) Come in. Come in. What do you want to know? Madame Zoobenka sees all.

MEREDITH: Thank you. I just have one question.

MADAME ZOOBENKA: Madame Zoobenka knows all.

MEREDITH: What I want to know is –

MADAME ZOOBENKA: (interrupting) Cash up front, honey. $24.50 including tax. (MEREDITH pays) What is it? What do you want to know? Your hands are very descriptive. Your face has interesting shadows. This is going to be a most fascinating

Meredith and Madame Zoobenka Meredith and Madame Zoobenka

session. Ask your question and Madame Zoobenka will answer. MADAME ZOOBENKA: Huh? Oh that’s just for show. The future She will tell all. is easier to believe when it comes from Eastern Europe. Don’t ask me why; I just follow the trends. MEREDITH: Ok. (She takes a deep breath) Ok. This is what I want to know. How long am I supposed to wait for the man of my MEREDITH: Well this is no good. I mean if I had a timeline - you dreams? will wait x number of years and then open the door, I’d be willing to wait. For the man of my dreams I’m willing to wait. MADAME ZOOBENKA: Come again? My mother always said, “Don’t settle. Don’t give away your MEREDITH: My Prince Charming. My knight in shining armour. The dreams. I settled for a car salesman and I’ve been kicking one who’s going to sweep me off my feet and make me happy myself ever since.” for the rest of my life. How long am I supposed to wait? MADAME ZOOBENKA: Used or new?

MADAME ZOOBENKA: You watch too much TV. MEREDITH: Used.

MEREDITH: You’re supposed to see into the future. So look into MADAME ZOOBENKA: The poor dear. the future and tell me when he’s going to come. MEREDITH: But now, I don’t know. It’s so unpredictable. And it’s so MADAME ZOOBENKA: Oh honey. Here, take your money back. unfair to Sherm. Go put an ad in the paper. Better yet, stand on a street corner with a sign: “Wanted: One man of dreams.” You’ll be farther MADAME ZOOBENKA: Who’s Sherm? ahead than anything I can tell you. MEREDITH: My boyfriend. MEREDITH: Chad said you could tell me. Chad said you were the best. MADAME ZOOBENKA: Hold the phone. Hold the phone. Why are you looking for a white knight when you already have a Sherm? MADAME ZOOBENKA: (losing accent) Chad gets paid to say that. You’re here with your don’t-settle-for-a-car-salesman sob Look. I can do wealth and prosperity. I can do great romance story and you have a Sherm? Do you know how many people and when’s the best time of year to buy a house. I can usually out there are waiting for a knight and have no back-up Sherm make a stab at children. But how long you should wait for to lean on? the man of your dreams? If I could do that do you think I’d be sitting here? Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for MEREDITH: Sherm is great, don’t get me wrong. He’s sweet and the man of my dreams? It ain’t been a minute and it ain’t been kind and he loves me and – pretty. MADAME ZOOBENKA: And?

MEREDITH: What happened to your accent? MEREDITH: He’s short. My friends make fun of me all the time. He can barely kiss me without standing on tiptoe. He’s not man- of-my-dreams material. He’s not the one I’ve been waiting for.

Meredith and Madame Zoobenka Meredith and Madame Zoobenka

MADAME ZOOBENKA: How do you know? MEREDITH: Of course I do.

MEREDITH: His name is Sherm! The man of your dreams doesn’t MADAME ZOOBENKA: Then stop whinging and stop waiting for get off a horse and say, “Hello. My name is Sherm.” It doesn’t a man who’s living in your head. I will wait no longer. (calling work like that. out as she leaves) Mel! Mel! Fire up the station wagon and the Johnny Cash. We’re going to Vegas. MADAME ZOOBENKA: (standing up) You watch way too much TV. MEREDITH: (running after) Wait! Wait! MEREDITH: Hey. Where are you going? What about my future!  MADAME ZOOBENKA: I’ve just seen the light. I’m going to get my Mel.

MEREDITH: Who’s Mel?

MADAME ZOOBENKA: Mel wants to marry me. I’ve been putting him off and putting him off ’cause I’ve been waiting too. Only I’ve been waiting for one of those tall, dark and handsome types. Someone who drives a motorcycle and has long curly hair.

MEREDITH: You see. You know what you want. My mother was right. Why settle?

MADAME ZOOBENKA: ’Cause this whole wait for the man of your dreams thing is crackers in your head. Who says the man of your dreams is going to come? What if you wait forever and you lose your Sherm and I lose my Mel and we’re both bitter old women, the kind with lots of cats and dust balls for company. Kids on the street will pass by our houses and snicker. I do not want that to happen to me. I’m going to marry a man who loves me and I love him and who cares if he has a lisp and a handlebar moustache and likes Country and Western? Do you love your Sherm?

MEREDITH: Yes but –

MADAME ZOOBENKA: Neh, Neh, Neh. Do you love your Sherm?

Jan and Tara Jan and Tara

PLAY: Pretty Girl/Plain Girl (Ten/Two) JAN: Yes.

GENRE: Serio-Comedy TARA laughs. TIME: 4:00 JAN What’s so funny?  DESCRIPTION TARA: What do you think you’re doing?

Jan is a typically plain girl. Tara is typically pretty. Jan tries to step out of her JAN: Registering for the Galaxy Girl Pageant. box by preparing for a beauty pageant. TARA: You can’t register. ACTING HINTS JAN: Why not? Both girls appear to live up to stereotype: pretty girls participate in beauty pageants and plain girls don’t. When we first meet Tara, her bad attitude is TARA: Look at you. expected. But it turns out her personality is completely different! Tara is very supportive of Jan. What kind of gestures can Tara do to show support? Perhaps a reassuring hand on Jan’s shoulder would work. JAN: What? Jan really wants to be in the pageant! But she’s also very insecure. Play the TARA: It’s obvious. Look! contrast between determination and insecurity.  JAN: I still don’t see why – TARA is sitting in a chair, filing her nails. Jan enters TARA: Look at the difference between us. I am clearly a ten. You and walks tentatively up to her. are clearly a two. (pointing at herself) Ten. (pointing at JAN) Two. Tens enter beauty pageants. Twos don’t. Now get out. JAN: Hi. JAN slumps her shoulders and slowly turns away. TARA: (with disgust) What? TARA immediately changes her demeanour, leaps up, looks worried and runs to block JAN. JAN: Is this the registration desk for the Galaxy Girl Pageant? TARA: Jan, are you ok? Are you ok? That was too much. I told you TARA: What? it would be too much. See, I told you.

JAN: Is this the registration desk for the Galaxy Girl Pageant? JAN: (not that fine) No, I’m fine. I’m fine. I just need to sit down.

TARA: What if it is? She sits down. TARA continues to flutter around her.

JAN: I’d like to register. TARA: You can’t look crushed like that. A pageant girl sees that look TARA: You? You want to be in the pageant? on your face and she’ll go in for the kill. JAN: They’ll really be that mean?

Jan and Tara Jan and Tara

TARA: I was just getting started. JAN: If I practice I can make it tougher. (she stands) I’m ready, insult me again. JAN: (slumping her shoulders again) Oh. TARA: (sits) I can’t. I can’t see that look on your face. TARA: See, you’re not up for this. JAN: I’m going to practice my walk. JAN: I am, I am. You’re doing the right thing. I need to be prepared. Let’s go again. JAN puts on a pair of high heels. She teeters around unsuccessfully. TARA: I don’t understand why you need to do it at all. JAN: I can do this. Thousands of girls enter pageants. JAN: I told you. TARA: Yeah and thousands don’t. TARA: Yeah, and it doesn’t get any less crazy the more you say it. JAN: Don’t you have a date tonight? JAN: I want to be a girl. TARA: Huh? Oh, I cancelled. TARA: News flash. You’re a girl. JAN: Why? JAN: A girly girl. TARA: Because you asked me to help you. TARA: Trust me, it’s no great shakes. JAN: But you had a date. JAN: Just once. A girly girl. I know it’s not in my future so I want to make sure it happens. TARA: I was just going to watch Dean and Frick and Frack watch basketball. Trust me, I can do that any time. TARA: Still sounds crazy. JAN: Won’t Dean get mad? JAN: I don’t want to look back on my life and regret I never tried to be girly. TARA: He better not. He’s not that special.

TARA: Can’t you just go to prom? Get a nice dress; I’ll do your hair. JAN: Don’t you love him? I’ll even nominate you for Prom Queen. Isn’t that enough? TARA: Oh, sure. Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t worry about it. JAN: This is what I want to do. JAN turns and stares at TARA. TARA: But a beauty pageant? They’ll humiliate you! JAN: Tara, you are not normal. JAN: I can take it. TARA: Why? TARA: You can’t. You don’t have a thick skin.

Jan and Tara Jan and Tara

JAN: You don’t want me to be in a pageant. You cancelled on your TARA: And you think I would pick her over you? boyfriend instead of me. You’re supposed to dump me for a guy. You’re supposed to dump me, period. JAN: It’s not your fault. It’s inevitable. It’s the way things have worked since the beginning of time. (JAN teeters) Oh crap. TARA: (puzzled) Dump you how? JAN windmills her arms, has trouble with her JAN: I wish you’d just hurry up and get it over with. balance, and knocks TARA.

TARA: Get what over with? JAN: Double crap!

JAN: The writing’s on the wall. You’ll talk to me a little less, and a TARA: Watch out! little less and then one day you’ll stop talking to me altogether. You won’t even look at me in the halls. We won’t be friends JAN crashes to the floor. anymore. It’ll be like we never were friends. TARA: Are you all right?

TARA: That’s ridiculous. JAN: I think the heels won.

JAN: Selene doesn’t think so. TARA: Take those stupid things off.

TARA turns to JAN. TARA grabs a foot and JAN cries out.

TARA: When did you – TARA: Oh oh.

JAN: In the bathrooms on the second floor. I was in a stall when you JAN: Oh oh is right. (she touches her ankle, hissing in pain) I think I did came in. I heard what she said about me. I’m plain. Boring. Not some damage. worth hanging out with. TARA: Do you want to stay on the floor or go to the chair? TARA: And did you hear what I said? I stood up for you! JAN: Chair. JAN: But how long will that go on? TARA helps JAN up. They start hobbling to the chair. TARA: You should have come out. We could have stood up to her together. TARA: I hate to disappoint you, but I don’t do what Selene tells me.

JAN: What’s the point? She’s popular and pretty. I’m going to be JAN: But what if she stops being your friend? a scientist and that is as far away from pretty as it gets. You know just as well as I do there’s a gap bigger than the Grand TARA: Then she wasn’t worth it to begin with. Canyon between the Selene’s and the me’s of the world. You JAN: Don’t you read magazines? You’re not supposed to think for can’t hover in the middle. You have to pick a side. yourself! You are totally abnormal.

Jan and Tara Jane and The Woman Who Walks

TARA gets JAN in the chair. PLAY: Jealousy Jane

TARA: So what are you saying? If you were pretty and I was plain, GENRE: Comedy you’d dump me as a friend? TIME: 2:15

JAN: No. I don’t think so. I don’t know. If you’re going to do it to  me, just do it. Ok? Don’t spare my feelings. Rip that friendship DESCRIPTION off like a Band-Aid. Jane is attached to a “Jealousy Monster.” She has denied it so much that the TARA: Sorry to disappoint you but… (she’s been studying JAN’s foot) monster has grown and taken control. At a Jealousy Monster’s Ball, Jane meets You really did a number on this. another person with a monster. ACTING HINTS JAN: How am I going to compete in the pageant? The Woman Who Walks should have a 40’s Film Noir flair about her. She’s TARA: You don’t have to! I don’t care what you look like. I don’t mysterious and other-worldly. In contrast, Jane is modern and almost brash in care what Selene says you look like. her despair. Play with the physical comedy of Jane constantly turning toward and away JAN: (almost crying) I care. from the Woman Who Walks. There is a pause as the girls look at each other. This scene marks a change in Jane as she finally admits her jealous behaviour. Allow this revelation to be a moment of triumph. TARA: You’ll wear flats.  JAN: Everyone else will be in heels. The WOMAN WHO WALKS sashays in to stand by JANE. She is carrying a clutch purse. She does not TARA: There are these flats in Stanbrooks. I saw them last week. look at JANE. Pointy toe, thin, sort of pink, sort of mauve; very pretty. They’ll look great and you’ll be able to walk. We can go WWW: Pssst. Psssst! tomorrow if you want. JANE: Huh? JAN: What about Dean? WWW: Pssst. TARA: They won’t fit, but they’d probably look pretty on him too. JANE: (turning to WWW) Are you pssting me? JAN: Jerk. WWW: Don’t look at me! TARA: Doofus. JANE: (turning away with a jerk) Why not? JAN: Ok. Flats it is. WWW: We mustn’t arouse suspicion. 

Jane and The Woman Who Walks Jane and The Woman Who Walks

JANE: Why not? With who? JANE: You do? Where is it then? Where’s your rope?

WWW: The monsters of course. WWW: I have no rope.

JANE: (turning to WWW) The - JANE: Then how can you have a monster?

WWW: Don’t look at me! WWW: It’s in here.

JANE: (looking away from WWW) Sorry. (The WWW doesn’t say JANE: Where? anything.) Ah, what can I do for you? WWW: Here. (She holds out her purse) WWW: I can’t help but notice that you have a monster attached to you. JANE: There?

JANE: Can’t help but notice? (raising her voice) Are you demented? WWW: Go ahead. Open it.

WWW: Shhhh!! JANE: (looking inside the purse) How did you do that? How did you get it so small? JANE: (turning to WWW) Sorry, sorry. WWW: I took control of the little creep. I showed it who was boss WWW: Don’t look at me! and shrunk it down to size.

JANE: (turning from WWW) Ok. Yes I have a monster. JANE: Wow. That’s amazing. But I thought they were impossible to get rid of. WWW: Why don’t you control it? WWW: Who told you that? JANE: I would if I could. JANE: My monster. WWW: So why don’t you? WWW: Of course it did. It wants you helpless and hopeless. JANE: Look lady you obviously have no idea what I’m going through so - JANE: That’s how I feel, all right.

WWW: I have a monster. WWW: (whispering) Psssst.

JANE: (raising her voice) What? JANE: (whispering) What?

WWW: Shh! Shh! WWW: (whispering) You can do it too.

JANE: (turning to WWW) Sorry. JANE: (whispering) Do what?

WWW: Don’t look at me! I have a monster too. WWW: Shrink your monster.

Jane and The Woman Who Walks Agatha and Eunice

JANE: I can’t. PLAY: Agatha Rex

WWW: You can. GENRE: Serio-Comedy TIME: 3:30 JANE: I’m telling you I can’t. It’s got my script and I can’t even get a word in edgewise. 

WWW: You must fight, Jane. That is the only way. Otherwise you DESCRIPTION will lose yourself completely. Soon the monster will not be Agatha and Eunice wait for the arrival of Dr. Creon, the principal. Agatha is satisfied with being on the end of a rope, dragging you around. being punished for wearing a hat in school. Eunice, the hall monitor, guards It will want to come closer and closer. It will want to take over Agatha. completely. There’ll be nothing left of you. ACTING HINTS

JANE: (with horror) Just like the circus barker said. Agatha is finding a freedom in expressing her thoughts: this is a new frame of mind for her. Allow Agatha to find joy in her new freedom. WWW: Pardon? Eunice is a rigid, tense character and is more afraid for Agatha than Agatha is. JANE: Nothing. I don’t want to disappear. Tell me what I have to do. How you can present these characters physically? How will you show Agatha’s freedom and Eunice’s rigidity? WWW: Name it. That is the first step.  JANE: If I name it, that means I admit I’m a jealous person. EUNICE stares at AGATHA. AGATHA stares back, amused. AGATHA is wearing a cap. WWW: Aren’t you? AGATHA: Do you always do this? JANE: Maybe a little bit. I haven’t been very nice to my friends and family. I can’t help it. Sometimes it’s just like punching out, only EUNICE: What? I’m not hitting anything. It’s like I’m lashing out with words and thoughts and hate. I hate it when other people do better AGATHA: Stare. than me. I hate it that my sister is so pretty. When other girls EUNICE: What are you talking about? talk to Bill, I instantly assume there’s something going on. I’m so afraid he’s going to leave me and after everything that’s AGATHA: Do you always stare at the person sitting in this chair happened I wouldn’t be surprised if he does. It’s all my fault. I waiting to see Dr. Creon? It’s very intimidating. am a jealous person. EUNICE: Are you insulting me? WWW: Say it Jane, say it! AGATHA: On the contrary. I think it’s quite hard for some people JANE: I am Jealousy Jane! to look intimidating. You do it well. 

Agatha and Eunice Agatha and Eunice

EUNICE: If you took the cap off now, you might only get away with EUNICE: No. a warning. AGATHA: Me neither. My mom wants me to go to Vassar. But that’s AGATHA: No thanks. just because she went there, which is a good reason, I guess. I mean I like the school and I don’t want to not go there just EUNICE: Suit yourself. because she went there, but still…

There is a moment of silence. AGATHA starts to EUNICE: It would be best if you sat still and didn’t talk. hum to herself. This confuses EUNICE. She doesn’t know why AGATHA isn’t afraid. She seems even AGATHA: Do you ever think of breaking rules? more confused when AGATHA breaks out into a song. EUNICE: What are you talking about?

EUNICE: (cutting her off) Agatha!! AGATHA: Rules. Do you ever think about not following them? Moving in the opposite direction. Breaking them. AGATHA: Oops sorry. Is there a rule about singing? I must have forgot. It’s just that the rulebook is so very heavy; it’s a little EUNICE: Agatha! (in an agonized whisper) He’s right through that hard to carry around. I promise I won’t do it again. door.

EUNICE: You don’t seem to realize the severity of the situation. AGATHA: I’m not doing anything! All I did was ask if you thought about breaking the rules. I didn’t ask you to break anything. AGATHA: We haven’t talked in a long time, have we? You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.

EUNICE: What? EUNICE: That’s right.

AGATHA: We used to talk. We used to have some pretty AGATHA: But do you never… great conversations. You must remember the sixth grade lunchroom. (EUNICE’s expression does not change.) Don’t you? EUNICE: Never.

EUNICE: I have no recollection of that time. AGATHA: Never?

AGATHA: Really? That’s too bad. I have a lot of fond memories of EUNICE: No. “that time.” I guess it has been awhile. Still, we did lead some AGATHA: No impulses to throw Jell-O around the cafeteria? of the most legendary food fights in the history of the school. You have to remember that. EUNICE: No.

EUNICE: I guess we run in different circles these days. AGATHA: No desire to un-tuck a shirt or slouch one of your socks.

AGATHA: I guess. Do you know where you’re headed next year? EUNICE: No!

Agatha and Eunice Ashley and Jane

AGATHA: Why not? PLAY: Among Friends and Clutter

EUNICE: Agatha! GENRE: Comedy TIME: 1:30 AGATHA: There’s a certain power about it, you know. Thinking about breaking the rules. I feel pretty good about it. There’s  nothing wrong with thinking, you know. It’s just ideas floating DESCRIPTION around in my brain. I’ve been thinking about the uniform. I mean, I agree with the theory but does it really put everyone Two friends, who are complete opposites, share their completely opposite on an even keel? thoughts about boys. ACTING HINTS EUNICE: You should stop talking right now. The two characters have opposite personalities. Ashley is girly, Jane is a tom AGATHA: Sometimes you have to take what you’re thinking very boy. The dialogue shows how opposite they are. Make sure that contrast is seriously. Sometimes you have to act on what you’re thinking carried through in the physical side of the characters. How do Ashley and Jane about and there’s nothing wrong with that either. stand? If Ashley primps in the mirror, what does Jane do? Give each character a gesture that shows off their character. If they didn’t speak, the audience EUNICE: I haven’t the slightest idea - should be able to tell what kind of character they are: girly or tom boy.  AGATHA: (interrupting) What I’m doing. What am I doing here? Am I cheating on a test? Am I failing school? Am I breaking windows? ASHLEY runs into the bathroom screaming, with Am I hurting anyone? Am I torturing small animals? None of JANE close behind. During the scene ASHLEY the above. Nobody does that around here. And it got me to primps while JANE watches. thinking even more. ASHLEY: SCREAMMM EUNICE: You want people to torture small animals? JANE: Ashley, what are you doing in the bathroom? AGATHA: All I am doing is wearing a hat. Why is it I can get into ASHLEY: Ooooooh Jane did you see them? Did you see them? just as much trouble wearing a hat as I could for torturing a small animal? What does that mean? JANE: You spend way too much time in the bathroom.

EUNICE: Rules are rules for a reason. The uniform is set for a ASHLEY: They looked right at us. reason. JANE: Who. AGATHA: I suppose. But I’ve been thinking I don’t like these rules anymore. ASHLEY: Kevin and Jim.

 JANE: Oh. Them. They’re just going to play catch with us Ash.

Ashley and Jane Ashley and Jane

ASHLEY: I can’t play catch I’ll get all dirty. (looking at herself) Look at JANE: What is a moor? that. Flat as a board. ASHLEY: Wander the moors calling Jim… Jim… JANE: So what. JANE: Why don’t I just ask Jim? ASHLEY: Do you think he likes me? ASHLEY: Don’t you dare. JANE: Who? JANE: Why don’t you just ask Jim? ASHLEY: Jim of course. Sometimes you are so stupid. ASHLEY: Jane. Just ask Kevin ok? JANE: He’s just a boy Ash. JANE: Alright. ASHLEY: Do you think he likes Meredith better than me? I hear she’s got her period. And she’s got breasts. ASHLEY: Thanks.

JANE: Breasts just get in the way of playing catch. JANE: Can we play catch now?

ASHLEY: Don’t you care about boys? You hang around them  enough.

JANE: I care about baseball. Boys play baseball.

ASHLEY: Jane… will you do me a big favour? I’ll be your best friend.

JANE: I thought you already were my best friend.

ASHLEY: Jane, I’ll die if I don’t find out if Jim likes me. You’ve got to find out for me. Will you please ask Kevin to ask Jim? I’ll die if I don’t find out.

JANE: Ashley you won’t die. People don’t die because of that stuff.

ASHLEY: My sister says there’s this girl in this book, Wuthering Heights? She dies of a broken heart, and wanders the moors crying - “Heathcliff! Heathcliff!”

JANE: What a stupid name.

ASHLEY: I could die and wander the moors.

Beatrice & Benedick

PLAY: Much Ado High School GENRE: Comedy TIME: 2:00   DESCRIPTION Beatrice wants revenge on the boy who has embarrassed her cousin. Benedick wants to prove he’s her knight in shining armour. ACTING HINTS

This scene is not 100% realistic. Both characters are a little exaggerated. They Scenes for are both intense with their wants: Beatrice wants someone to hurt Claudio, Benedick wants to date Beatrice and will do anything she wants – almost. Be careful about taking the exaggerated tone of the dialogue too far. The scene won’t work if everything is joky. The characters are serious about what they want and should be played completely straight. Let the goofiness of the One Girl and dialogue speak for itself.  BEATRICE pushes up her sleeves, cracks her One Guy knuckles and turns to go after CLAUDIO. BENEDICK: Beatrice, wait. Where are you going?

BEATRICE: I have a score to settle with your little friend.  BENEDICK: Just wait a second. Don’t go off in a huff. BEATRICE: If you start quoting Dickens I’ll dislocate your kneecaps.

BENEDICK: Please! Even I know this is not a time for Dickens. Just wait a sec.

BEATRICE: Your jerk friend humiliated my cousin! I mean, sure she’s not my favourite person in the world. She’s incredibly annoying. That voice of hers makes me want to drive my

Beatrice & Benedick Beatrice & Benedick

head through a wall sometimes and the boy-crazy thing is so BENEDICK: Are you going to make me say it again? Aren’t you fond stupid… Why am I going after Claudio again? of me too? A little bit? Beebee-weebee?

BENEDICK: He told Hero she was a liar, liar, pants on fire. BEATRICE: Have you ever heard of the phrase “wrong place, wrong time?” BEATRICE: Wait till I get my hands on him! BENEDICK: Well we’re not going to get married right here on the BENEDICK: You can’t do anything to Claudio. dance floor for crying out loud. Give me a break. I haven’t even BEATRICE: Why not? mentioned cooties for a whole minute.

BENEDICK: You’re a girl. BEATRICE: True…

BEATRICE: I’m a girl? BENEDICK: All I’m asking if you are fond of me a little bit. That’s all.

BENEDICK: You’re a girl. BEATRICE: I… I… am. I am. Whew, I thought algebra was hard.

BEATRICE: I can’t do anything because I’m a girl? BENEDICK: Now we’re fond of each other, let me do this for you. Let me go talk to Claudio about what he’s done and why he’s BENEDICK: Exactly. done it.

BEATRICE: Who died and made you king of the world? If I want to BEATRICE: Oh no, I don’t want you to talk to him. pummel that little weasel into pudding I can and I will. BENEDICK: What do you want me to do? BEATRICE starts to exit and BENEDICK stops her. BEATRICE: I want you to kill Claudio. BENEDICK: Let me do it. BENEDICK: Are you crazy? Do you know what would happen to BEATRICE: You? You? Why would you do it? me in jail? I’m not going to kill him.

BENEDICK: Well, because, I’m rather, fond. Of you. BEATRICE: Will you maim Claudio?

BEATRICE: Of me. BENEDICK: No.

BENEDICK: Of you. BEATRICE: Disfigure Claudio?

BEATRICE: Of me. BENEDICK: No.

BENEDICK: Of you. BEATRICE: Cripple Claudio?

BEATRICE: Of me. BENEDICK: No.

Beatrice & Benedick One and Two

BEATRICE: Scar him? PLAY: Santa Runs a Sweat Shop (Ten/Two) BENEDICK: No. GENRE: Comedy BEATRICE: Slap him? TIME: 3:45 BENEDICK: No.  BEATRICE: Kick him? DESCRIPTION

BENEDICK: No. A brother and a sister wait up for Santa Claus. Two has a lot of not-so-normal questions to ask the Jolly fellow dressed in red. BEATRICE: Tease his family? ACTING HINTS

BENEDICK: No! I’m not going to do any of those things. There is an energy contrast between the two characters. One is excited and happy about Christmas and meeting Santa. Two is deadly serious. She speaks BEATRICE: Would you give him a wedgie? with slow determination. Play up the contrast between the characters in the way that they speak, the speed they speak and the type of gestures they use. BENEDICK: That I can do. What would an excited happy character do with their hands? What would a determined person do with their hands? BEATRICE: (flinging her arms around him) My knight!   ONE and TWO are siblings. ONE is six years old and TWO is eight years old. Both can be either gender.

ONE and TWO sit side-by-side. TWO has a look of fierce determination on her face. ONE is desperately trying to stay awake. ONE closes his eyes and droops on TWO’s shoulder. TWO pokes ONE to make him wake up.

ONE: (sitting up) I’m awake, I’m awake!

They sit silently. ONE instantly begins to droop again. He drops his chin to his chest and starts to snore. TWO looks annoyed and pokes ONE to wake him up.

ONE: (sitting up) I’m awake, I’m awake!

One and Two One and Two

TWO: Shhhhhh. They’ll hear you. ONE: I know, I know.

ONE: (rubbing his eyes) What time is it? ONE gives another jaw-cracking yawn and slumps down in his seat. TWO: (looking at her watch) 10:01 – wait, 10:02. TWO: Would you stop yawning! ONE: (stretching and yawning) How much longer? ONE: But I’m so tired. I don’t know why. I’m never tired. (this just TWO: We’ve got hours to go. occurs to him, he sits straight up) You think Mom and Dad know ONE: Hours? How many hours? what we’re up to? They know and they put something in the food to make us sleepy? TWO: Till after Mom and Dad go to bed, for sure. TWO: I’m not sleepy. ONE: They’re still awake? ONE: What did I eat that you didn’t eat? (he gasps) Mom made me TWO: Uh huh. eat sweet potato! (imitating) ”How do you know you don’t like something if you don’t try it? Try it for Mommy!” She put ONE: Can’t we tell them to hurry up? sleeping potion in the sweet potato!

TWO: Then we’d have to tell them why we want them to hurry up. TWO: She did not.

ONE: Oh. ONE: Did you eat it?

TWO: I couldn’t fall asleep if I tried. I’m too excited to sleep. TWO: No.

ONE yawns, his mouth as wide as it will go. ONE: Then how do you know if she did or didn’t?

TWO: Aren’t you excited? TWO: They don’t know we’re staying up. If they did, they’d be ONE: I am, I am. I’m just tired excited. I’m tired and I’m excited. I’m checking up on us every five seconds. tire-cited. ONE: Not if they know we ate sweet potato potion.

TWO: That’s stupid. TWO: That’s stupid. There’s no potion.

ONE: What if we fall asleep like last year? There is a pause. TWO looks wide awake. ONE TWO: We won’t. I’m not falling asleep for anything. This is an begins to droop. important moment. It could be the most important moment of ONE: (yawns again) I don’t know if I’m gonna make it. I can hardly our lives. keep my eyes open.

One and Two One and Two

TWO: Use your fingers to hold the lids up. ONE: But he’s Santa. He’d never do anything bad.

ONE: That’s a good idea. (trying to hold eyes open with fingers) Do you TWO: That’s what he wants us to believe. I’ll bet he pays those know what you’re going to ask? elves peanuts and they’re supposed to take it ’cause they work for the big guy in the red suit. TWO: Sure. Do you? ONE: But he’s Santa. Ho, ho, ho. He laughs like a bowl full of jelly? ONE: Oh yeah. I thought about it all day. Maybe that’s why I’m so tired. I worked my brain so hard, it’s in a coma! TWO: It’s the nice guys you have to watch out for. I want to know about wages, I want to know about working conditions, I want TWO: Somehow I doubt it. What are you gonna ask him? to know about days off and if he’s squashed any unions. And ONE: I wanna know… (fast and excited) what he feeds the reindeer. what about Mrs. Claus? Is she on the payroll or is she working Do reindeer really like carrots? I think they’d like oats better, under the table? (she rubs her hands together with glee) Oh yes, or grass, ’cause there’s never any grass at the North Pole. I Mr. Claus and I are going to have a long chat tonight, oh yes bet they’d love grass. It’s like a special treat or something, and indeed. that would be a good thing to leave out, but how do you keep ONE looks at TWO for a second and gets up. grass from the summer till now? And I wanna know… if Santa’s fat all the time, or does he lose weight during the year. Mom TWO: Where are you going? says that’s not nice, and you shouldn’t ask people about their weight. But I wanna know. He wouldn’t mind if I asked, would ONE: Bed. he? And I wanna know… if the snow at the North Pole is light TWO: Why? Don’t you want to talk to Santa? and fluffy or if it’s packing snow and if the elves have snowball fights. I think it’s packing snow, but if he’s going to be standing ONE: Not so much anymore. See you in the morning. Merry right in front of me, I’m gonna ask him for sure. So. (pause) Christmas. What are you gonna ask about? ONE exits. TWO: Labour relations. TWO: Suit yourself. Merry Christmas! (to herself) All right, fatty. It’s ONE: Huh? just you and me. You. And me.

TWO: I think Santa’s extorting the elves. She rubs her hands together.

ONE: He’s doing what?  TWO: I’m talking a North Pole Sweat Shop. How else is he able to make so many toys? Those elves seem happy but I’ll bet it’s a front. I’ll bet there’s something, someone making those elves act happy.

Todd and Stacey Todd and Stacey

PLAY: Hairball They sit. She - fuming. He - confused. He makes GENRE: Comedy faces to himself as he desperately tries to figure out what he did wrong. TIME: 4:00  TODD: Was it the - DESCRIPTION STACEY: Not ready yet.

Stacey and Todd are girlfriend and boyfriend. Stacey is furious at Todd for a They sit. Finally STACEY closes her eyes and lets out flippant comment he made, but Todd has no idea why she’s upset. a deep breath. She turns to TODD.

ACTING HINTS STACEY: All right. You can go. Stacey and Todd like each other. No matter how mad Stacey is, no matter how slow Todd seems, they are a good couple. That’s the underlying emotion to the TODD: Go where? scene. STACEY: You can go, you can talk. The dialogue at the beginning of the scene is quick and snappy, with long pauses while Todd tries to figure out what he did wrong. Pay attention to the TODD: About what? Oh! I can go! Ok, Stacey all I wanted to ask variations in pace. What are the characters thinking when they speak quickly? What are they thinking when they speak slowly? you was… I’m not sure… you look really upset.  STACEY: I am. STACEY and TODD sit side by side. Stacey is fuming. TODD: And I did something to make you upset. Really, really fuming. Todd has no idea what he did wrong, and after a moment of silence tries to broach STACEY: You did. the subject. TODD: And I have no idea what that is.

TODD: Stacey, I - STACEY: You don’t?

STACEY: Don’t talk to me. TODD: Not a clue.

TODD: But I - STACEY: You don’t know what you said that hurt me to the heart of STACEY: Don’t do it. my being?

TODD: I just want to - TODD: That bad, huh? I’m really sorry, Stace.

STACEY: I said don’t talk to me. When I’m ready for you to talk to STACEY: But you don’t know what you’re sorry for. me, I will let you know. Until then, the thing to do is not talk. TODD: Isn’t that what I’m supposed to do? Say sorry no matter what?

Todd and Stacey Todd and Stacey

STACEY: But it doesn’t do any good if you have no idea what you STACEY: No… (getting back on track) Tonight, you were talking to did! the girls and you were talking about me. Remember that?

TODD: Sorry, I’m sorry! We’ll talk about it tomorrow, ok? TODD: Uh huh.

STACEY: No. STACEY: You were talking about me and you told the girls… you told them… (she’s traumatized) You told them I had Pageant TODD: Huh? Girl hair.

STACEY: No. We can’t leave it like this. It was too hurtful and may TODD: Yeah I did! It’s so fluffy and pretty and it looks just like have done irreparable damage to our relationship. (seeing her face) and obviously this is not a good thing and I TODD: What kind of damage? should not have done it and I’m very very sorry.

STACEY: We’re going to have to sit here until you figure this out. STACEY: No, you’re not.

TODD: We are? TODD: I sure am.

STACEY: Yes. STACEY: You just there, just that second thought that Pageant Girl hair was good. There is a pause as they sit. She - serene. He - clueless. TODD: Nope I don’t. Not at all, no way. (pause) So why isn’t it good? TODD: Stace, I’ve got swim practice in the morning. STACEY: It’s Pageant hair. Beauty Queen hair. It’s girls in ugly STACEY: (annoyed) All right, all right! Just this one time, I’ll tell you. evening gowns, and parading around in not much more than (She turns to face him. Very serious.) Todd. At the party tonight. high heels and a smile, and old fat balding judges drooling over You were talking with the girls. them and it’s all about looks and girls being mean to each other and backstabbing and saying ”oh, you look so pretty” TODD: Which girls? when they don’t mean it and falsies, and Vaseline on the teeth STACEY: The girls. and ”I’m going to feed the homeless” platforms and it’s all gross and icky and I can’t believe you think I look like that! TODD: There were a lot of girls. TODD: Stacey. You curled your hair. You don’t usually do that. I STACEY: Shauna and Sherry. My girls. Who else would the girls be? thought it looked nice. You looked… special. And I was trying Were you talking to other girls? to say so and it was the first thing that came to my mind. I am now, officially, sorry. TODD: No! Did you see me talking to other girls? STACEY: I’m never curling my hair again.

Todd and Stacey Todd and Stacey

TODD: Ok. TODD: No?

STACEY: Ok? Is it really ok or are you just shutting me up? STACEY: You don’t want that, you really don’t.

TODD: I like you with straight hair, curly hair, short hair or long TODD: But I might. hair. You can get a buzz cut if you want, I don’t care. I like you. STACEY: But they’re so gross. Todd! They’re gross! They’re the STACEY: (very pleased) Really? grossest haircut ever.

TODD: Really. TODD: Grosser than Beauty Queen hair?

STACEY: That’s nice, Todd. STACEY: (as if she’s eaten a bug) Yes.

TODD: Are we square now? TODD: Are you saying you won’t like me with a mullet?

STACEY: Yes. STACEY: Ye- (She’s caught. She coughs.) I’m not saying that. Necessarily. TODD: Good. TODD: Are you sure? They sit quietly for a moment. STACEY looks over the moon that TODD said he liked her. TODD gets STACEY: (this is killing her) If you really wanted one, you… should… a little evil look on his face. (she sighs) you should get one.

TODD: You know, I’ve been thinking of changing my hair too. TODD: And you’d still go out with me?

STACEY: Oh yeah? STACEY: (really killing her) I would.

TODD: Uh huh. Something different. TODD: (enjoying this) Ah maybe not. Maybe I’ll get Pageant Girl hair.

STACEY: You’d look so good with those little front spikes. I can help STACEY: Huh? you if you want. TODD: What do you think? I got a lot of bounce already. I bet it TODD: I was thinking more along the lines of a… mullet. would come out real nice. Maybe some low lights?

STACEY: (aghast) Ah – wha? STACEY: (her eyes narrow) Were you teasing me?

TODD: You know, a mullet. Short on the sides. Long in the back. I TODD: Maybe. think I’d look really good in one. STACEY: You were teasing me! (she starts to hit him) I can’t believe STACEY: (fast) I really don’t think so. you were teasing me! You’re on the swim team! You never tease me.

Todd and Stacey Pete and Nicky

TODD: (really enjoying this) First time for everything. (he runs off) PLAY: Wait Wait Bo Bait (Middle School Version) STACEY: Get back here! (she exits after him) GENRE: Drama  TIME: 2:40  DESCRIPTION

Two friends are in a hospital emergency room, waiting to learn how seriously their friend has been hurt in an accident. ACTING HINTS

Think about how you move when you’re nervous and impatient. What do you do with your hands? Do you sit still with your hands folded? Do you pace back and forth? Pete and Nicky have opposing ways of expressing their nerves. Make sure they don’t both have the same actions. It’s all about the contrast. Both characters also feel very guilty. They both think they caused the accident. This is the subtext of the scene. It’s always on the minds of the characters when they speak, even when they talk about things that have nothing to do with the accident.  NICKY sits. PETE paces back and forth.

NICKY: Stop it.

PETE: (still pacing) What?

NICKY: Stop it.

PETE: What?

NICKY: Pacing. You’re wearing a hole in the carpet.

PETE: I can’t. I’m all wired up. When I’m wired up, I need to keep moving. It’s genetic or generational or geometrical or something. Why are you so calm? Isn’t this driving you nuts? Isn’t this eating you up inside? Aren’t you going crazy?

Pete and Nicky Pete and Nicky

NICKY: They took him in five minutes ago. It’s going to be awhile. PETE: I care. All it takes is for one germ to wipe out your whole immune system! We could be covered with germs right now. PETE: Awhile. (continues pacing) I hate waiting. Hate it, hate it, hate (he shivers) it. I’m never good at Christmas. And birthdays… don’t get me started on birthdays. NICKY: Is that stuff your mom says?

NICKY: Stop it! PETE: ’Course. She talks A LOT about germs. (looking around) Where are your parents? PETE: I can’t. NICKY: Calling Jason’s mom. NICKY: Come on, you’re making me dizzy. PETE: Oh. (pause) Oh. (pause) Nicky? PETE: (stopping dead) Dizzy. Are you getting sick? (he looks around with panic) You’re getting sick, I’ve heard stories of people NICKY: Would you stop talking for— getting sick in emergency rooms, worse than when they came in and dying and— PETE: I can’t sit here and —

NICKY: Would you shut up. Would you shut up about dying? People NICKY: We’re not talking — are staring. PETE: Do you know anyone who’s died?

PETE: You don’t need to get snippy. NICKY: (she looks at him before answering) No.

NICKY: Sorry. I’m not thinking straight. I’ve never—(she grabs her PETE: My grandfather died two years ago. head) I don’t know what to think or how to think and I don’t have any room in my brain for polite conversation. (she looks NICKY: I’m not talking about this. up) Snippy? PETE: And someone put the ugliest sweater on him. I’ve never seen PETE: Mom word. I like it. it before. It was a Christmas sweater, with snowmen.

NICKY: You would. NICKY: Pete.

PETE: (sits with a sigh) I hate waiting rooms more than I hate waiting. PETE: And snowflakes, and pom poms and there is no way Grandpa There are a ton of germs here. (he sniffs the air) I can smell would have been caught dead in a — them. NICKY: (standing) Pete! NICKY: You can’t smell germs. PETE: (standing) I threw the ball! I threw it, ok! I can’t stop—This is PETE: I can. my fault. It’s my fault Jason’s here and I can’t — NICKY: What do you care?

Pete and Nicky Nicola and Rick

NICKY: It’s my fault. I told you to throw long. Because he was being PLAY: Football Romeo so, (she throws her arms up) he just catches everything! GENRE: Comedy PETE: I wanted to throw it long. He said I’d never make the team. TIME: 4:00

NICKY: I wanted him not to catch the ball. I wanted him to look  bad. (pause) It’s not your fault. It’s not mine. DESCRIPTION

PETE: How do you know? (sits) I never saw that car. Nicola and Rick are boyfriend and girlfriend, both trying out for a part in the school production of Romeo and Juliet. But Rick is not exactly clear on what’s NICKY: Me neither. (sits) He’ll be fine. He has to. Right? going to be expected of him if he gets the part. PETE: How long do we have to wait to find out? ACTING HINTS

NICKY: I don’t know. So. How many germs are there here? Nicola is a driven character. She knows exactly what she wants and what she has to do to get it. Rick is a football player. He cares for Nicola but is very PETE: You don’t want to know. And don’t even get me started on clear about what ‘guys’ should and shouldn’t do. super germs. The super germs are the worst. Mom wouldn’t Nicola is a mentally strong character, Rick is a physically strong character. How can you show this physically? lie. Rick is a ‘dumb’ guy, but he also has a good heart. He sleeps a lot. Make sure NICKY: You can tell me if you want to. I won’t mind. Ok? both these aspects come across in your characterization.  PETE: Ok. NICOLA: Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?  Deny thy father and refuse thy name, Or if thou wilt not be but sworn my love And I’ll no longer be a Capulet.

NICOLA holds a pose of longing. She waits. And waits. She looks back at RICK who has fallen asleep. NICOLA keeps up her pose hoping he will come to. When he doesn’t, she swats him with her script.

NICOLA: It’s your line!

RICK: (waking up) Huh?

NICOLA: It’s your line!

Nicola and Rick Nicola and Rick

She shows him his place and gets right back into her RICK: By a name pose. I know not how to tell thee who I am. My name, dear saint, is hateful to myself, RICK: (speaking in a completely deadpan voice - like someone who Because it is an enemy to thee. doesn’t do much reading) Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at Had I it written, I would tear the word. this? RICK gives a linebacker growl as if he is tearing NICOLA turns to RICK in disgust over his acting. apart the word. NICOLA looks on helplessly.

NICOLA: Rick!!! NICOLA: Never mind. (she takes in a deep breath) I know I’m going RICK: What? to get this part. (she starts to gather her things) So, you’re going to meet me at the audition tomorrow at four o’clock. Can you NICOLA: You need to put more feeling into it. More oopmh! remember that or should I write it down?

RICK: But - RICK: Four o’clock. I got it.

NICOLA: Let’s pick it up a little further down. NICOLA: Good. (she gives RICK a peck on the cheek)

RICK: But - RICK: Why?

NICOLA: What’s in a name? That which we call a rose NICOLA: Why what? By any other word would smell as sweet; So Romeo would, were he not Romeo called, RICK: Why do I have to meet you at the audition? (a thought comes Retain that dear perfection which he owes to him) Oh I get it! You want moral support. You want me to Without that title. Romeo doff thy name, cheer you on. Maybe I should borrow a set of pompoms from And for thy name which is no part of thee, Brittany - “Go Niki!” (He laughs to himself at his own cleverness. Take all myself. Then he notices NICOLA staring at him.) What?

RICK reads his line like a footballer running NICOLA: Rick. We’ve been practicing speeches for days now. downfield - lots of oomph. He also mangles the text RICK: You’re great Nik. I know you’re going to get the part. as much as it can be mangled. NICOLA: We’re both going to get the part. RICK: I take thee at thy word. Call me but love and I’ll be new baptized; RICK: I’m going to be Juliet? Henceforth I never will be Raymeo. NICOLA: Try to stay with me. We’ve talked about this. Planned NICOLA: What man art thou, that thus bescreened in night this. We’ve been practicing so we can audition together and So stumblest on my counsel? get parts together and be on stage together.

Nicola and Rick Nicola and Rick

RICK: On stage? RICK: Don’t you even joke about that! It’s not the same thing. Not the same thing at all. NICOLA: You - Romeo. Me - Juliet. NICOLA: There aren’t going to be any kind of tights in the show. RICK: On stage? Ms. Kavendish is doing a modern version. No tights.

NICOLA: Yes. RICK: No?

RICK: In front of people? NICOLA: Jeans and t-shirts.

NICOLA: That’s how it’s usually done. RICK: I still can’t do it.

RICK: You never told me that!!! NICOLA: Ricky…

NICOLA: Rick… RICK: I play football. I take other football players by the head and RICK: Uh uh, no way, no can do. It’s fine behind closed doors where slam them to the ground. no one can see us but there’s no way I would ever stand… (he NICOLA: And you’re very good at that. But don’t you want to be becomes lost in thought - it almost looks like his brain has closed more than a football player? down) RICK: No. NICOLA: Rick? NICOLA: Don’t you want to be something else? RICK: Tights… RICK: No. NICOLA: Rick, what’s the matter? NICOLA: Don’t you want to fully experience the wonder, the thrill, RICK: (holding up the script) This guy, this Ray - the excitement that is William Shakespeare?

NICOLA: Romeo. RICK: No!

RICK: He wears tights! Shakespeare’s always done in tights. NICOLA: Fine. I see. (she picks up the script and moves away)

NICOLA: No it’s not. RICK: You’re mad.

RICK: Niki, you want me to embarrass myself in front of the entire NICOLA: No. Not at all. I’m perfectly - (RICK moves in to hug her) football team looking like a ballerina? Don’t touch me!!

NICOLA: Don’t football players wear tights? RICK: I’m sorry Niki. It’s just not going to work.

NICOLA: I understand.

Nicola and Rick Nicola and Rick

RICK: Good. NICOLA: Big time.

NICOLA: So I guess you’ll be ok with the kissing scenes. RICK: When did you say the auditions were?

RICK: What? NICOLA: (with a big smile) Four o’clock.

NICOLA: You’ve been reading the play Rick; surely you noticed  there are at least two kissing scenes.

RICK: I wasn’t really paying attention.

NICOLA: If you’re not playing Romeo that means I’ll be kissing somebody else.

RICK: Give me that! (he takes the book from NICOLA and frantically flips pages)

NICOLA: I’m impressed Rick. I never thought you would be so open about this. You are really growing as a human being.

RICK: (whining like a baby) I can’t read this. I hate this guy! Why can’t he write English like everybody else. Where is it? Where is it?

He hands the book to NICOLA, who finds her page and acts out the scene between Romeo and Juliet at Capulet’s masked ball. She plays each part with utter seriousness.

NICOLA: (Juliet) Saints do not move though grant for prayers’ sake (Romeo) Then move not while my prayer’s effect I take. Thus from my lips, by thine, my sin is purged. (Juliet) Then have my lips the sin that they have took. (Romeo) Sin from my lips? O trespass sweetly urged! Give me my sin again.

Pause. RICK looks very confused.

RICK: Is that Shakespeare for kissing scene?

Dunno and Fine Dunno and Fine

PLAY: Tick Talk DUNNO: I can’t.

GENRE: Drama FINE: Why? TIME: 2:45 DUNNO: I have to go. (turns to go)  FINE: (she playfully gets in his way) Where? Why? DESCRIPTION DUNNO: Audrey! Give me some space will ya? Dunno and Fine are friends and fellow outcasts at school and at home. Fine deals with it and has a sense of humour. Dunno is not dealing with his situation FINE: (hurt) Hey. well at all. He’s in a downward spiral that could lead to danger. ACTING HINTS DUNNO: Sorry. Sorry. I just… I dunno. Dunno is serious right from the top of the scene. He is not in a good head FINE: What’s wrong? What happened today? space. At the beginning of the scene Fine doesn’t take Dunno’s tone seriously, she thinks he’s play acting. There should be a change in Fine’s personality when DUNNO: Nothing. she realizes he’s not joking and there’s something very wrong with him. Dunno is a power keg ready to blow. He’s very very tense. His body should FINE: (still with humour) Talk to me! be completely tense for the whole scene. Fine is more loose and joking. This is the first time she has ever seen Dunno act this way and be so serious. How DUNNO: Why? What’s the point? does she react to seeing this behaviour for the first time? FINE: Talking is good. What does Dunno want to do? What does he want to do to make people listen? Make a decision and keep it in mind throughout the scene. DUNNO: Nobody listens.  FINE: What am I? The amazing invisible girl? DUNNO: (deadpan) How was your day dear? DUNNO: Your parents never listen to you. That’s all you talk about. FINE: (light) Pretty crappy. What’s wrong with you? FINE: “Parents don’t listen.” Film at 11. So what. That’s why we have DUNNO: Dunno. Everything. each other right?

FINE: (joking) That’s nice and specific. DUNNO: Great. You and me talking in a vacuum forever and ever till the end of time. DUNNO: (not joking) Yeah. See you later. (turns to go) FINE: What happened to you today? FINE: Hey, hey! What’s going on? DUNNO: Nothing! Leave me alone! DUNNO: Nothing. DUNNO starts to leave and FINE gets in his way. FINE: (a joking whine) I thought we were gonna hang out.

Dunno and Fine Dunno and Fine

FINE: Hey! Ok. Ok. I get it you’re serious. Stop being the boy DUNNO: If you want people to listen, “Them” to listen, you have martyr and tell me what’s going on. Look at me. Who’s not to do more. You have to make people listen. Make them sit up listening to you? and take notice.

DUNNO: No one. Everyone. FINE: What are you talking about?

FINE: Since when did that start bothering you? (joking) How’s your DUNNO: You have to do something drastic to make people listen. day dear? What’s wrong with you? People don’t hear words. Words are nothing. People hear action. DUNNO: Maybe it’s not funny anymore. FINE: What are you talking about? FINE: Why? DUNNO: Dunno. DUNNO: Stop bothering me! FINE: Don’t be cute. Are you serious? FINE: You just said nobody listens. So… DUNNO: Dunno. DUNNO: I don’t mean you. I mean everyone else. FINE: Simon. FINE: What everyone else? DUNNO: You’ll be late for class. DUNNO: I don’t know. Them. People. FINE: Class? You think I care about class right now? FINE: People don’t listen. DUNNO: Don’t you? DUNNO: No. FINE: How long have you been thinking like this? FINE: If you tried to talk to people instead of - DUNNO: I’m not thinking like anything. I’m not doing anything. DUNNO: (dead serious) Talking does nothing! Don’t you get it? Talking is useless. In one ear and out the other. Talking is air. FINE: Simon. And I’m sick and tired of being nothing but air. DUNNO: (mocking her) Audrey. (there is a pause as she waits for him FINE: But why – to say something) What?

DUNNO: See! You’re not listening! FINE: Fine. Fine. You want to… you want to be this way, who am I to stop you. Whatever. Later. FINE: Ok, ok.

Dunno and Fine

She turns and starts to leave. She only gets a few steps away and stops. She stands, facing away from DUNNO, shaking her head.

DUNNO: Would you go already? Get out of here.

FINE: No.

DUNNO: Leave! FINE: No.  DUNNO: I don’t want you here.

FINE: I know you. DUNNO: You don’t know me. No one knows me. Scenes for FINE: I know this isn’t you. I know something happened. DUNNO: You don’t know anything. Two Guys FINE: You can act like an ass if you want. You can push me away but you won’t make me leave.

DUNNO: Then I’ll leave. DUNNO starts to exit. FINE calls after him.  FINE: I’m not going to walk away Simon. When you want to talk I’ll be here. Whenever. I won’t walk away.



Johan and Hans Johan and Hans

PLAY: Deck the Stage! JOHAN & HANS: In the beginning…

GENRE: Comedy HANS: That we would decide on a tree together. TIME: 2:50 JOHAN & HANS: But that was impossible. (each referring to the  other) He’s so competitive.

DESCRIPTION JOHAN: It’s horrible. Two brothers, Johan and Hans, talk about their Christmas Tree traditions. JOHAN & HANS: He always has to have his way. ACTING HINTS HANS: So now we get Papa to choose. This scene is all about pace and timing. The lines should flow from one character to another seamlessly. Lines continued with a ‘…’ should sound like JOHAN: I have five wins and Hans only has four. one continuous sentence. From an emotional standpoint, focus on the competition between the boys. HANS: Johan always says he has five and I only have four. Why does each feel that they must come out on top? Are the brothers twins, or is one older than the other? How does that affect JOHAN: He is such a sore loser. the piece? HANS: The year that we were twelve I had double pneumonia and  Mama would not let me go to the tree farm, even though I said I could go. JOHAN and HANS come downstage. They match each other step for step, as if they don’t want the JOHAN: I picked the tree, Papa cut it down. It counts. other to get ahead. HANS: It does not count. JOHAN & HANS: Every year my brother and I… JOHAN: It counts! JOHAN: Partake in a competition… JOHAN & HANS: He always gets like this. He always has to have his HANS: To choose the family Christmas tree. way. He’s impossible.

JOHAN: It’s been our job… HANS: The morning of the trip is always bright and crisp and clean.

JOHAN & HANS: Since we were seven years old. JOHAN: I arise extra early to make sure I have all of my equipment at hand. HANS: We go with our Papa to the tree farm. HANS: Sturdy boots! JOHAN: We each pick out a tree and he chooses the winner. JOHAN: Strong gloves! HANS: It used to be…

Johan and Hans Johan and Hans

HANS: Binoculars for the scouting! They both chuckle for a moment. Then they both breathe in again. JOHAN: Tags to mark the trees. JOHAN: We prepare. JOHAN & HANS: One year, he tried to claim a tree that I had clearly sighted first! HANS: We wait for the hand to go down.

HANS: Now a tree cannot be claimed until it has a tag on it. JOHAN: The air is silent.

JOHAN: It’s all his fault. HANS: There is nothing but Papa’s hand…

JOHAN & HANS: He’s so competitive. JOHAN: And the trees.

They both take a deep breath in. JOHAN & HANS: WE’RE OFF!

JOHAN: We stand at the entrance to the tree farm… The two start running in place. They are frantically searching for the best tree. HANS: Breathing in the cool, crisp, morning air. JOHAN: Trees to the left! They both breathe in. HANS: Trees to the right! JOHAN & HANS: Our breath makes tiny clouds of mist which fogs up our glasses. (They both wipe their glasses) JOHAN: Faster!

JOHAN: Papa must set us off at exactly the same time. HANS: Faster!

JOHAN & HANS: He always tries to cheat. JOHAN: Ah ha!

HANS: Johan’s foot is over the line! HANS: Bah!

JOHAN: Hans’ body is too far forward! JOHAN: Too small!

HANS: Inevitably Papa tells us to settle down or… HANS: Too tall!

JOHAN & HANS: He will pick the first scrawny broke bristle spruce JOHAN: Too fat! he can find and leave us for the dogs! HANS: Too puny! JOHAN: That Papa. JOHAN: Too old! JOHAN & HANS: What a sense of humour. HANS: Too new!

Johan and Hans Johan and Hans

JOHAN: Too much like the one we had last year. JOHAN & HANS: He is so impossible! He always has to have his way! JOHAN & HANS: I must find the perfect tree! I can’t let him beat me! The two cross their arms in frustration and stand with their backs to each other. HANS: Beautiful pines.  JOHAN: Lush foliage.

HANS: Green as emeralds.

JOHAN: Ah ha!

HANS: Ah ha!

JOHAN: AH HA!

HANS: AH AH!

They take in a deep breath and jump up and down for joy.

JOHAN & HANS: Every year it is so exhilarating! I can hardly wait!

JOHAN: And I know…

HANS: Without a shadow of a doubt…

JOHAN: That…

HANS: The winner…

JOHAN & HANS: Will be me!

HANS: Me.

JOHAN: Me.

HANS: Me!

JOHAN: ME!

Steve and Edgar Steve and Edgar

PLAY: Wait Wait Bo Bait comparing vacation spots. “I like Hawaii. Jamaica is nice this GENRE: Comedy time of year.” TIME: 2:00 STEVE: You’re just in a good mood ‘cause they haven’t reached your  parents and you’re not going to get yelled at till later. DESCRIPTION EDGAR: What’s the worst that could happen? You’ve never been in trouble before. Sure, your first time out has been a bit of a Steve and Edgar sit outside the Principal’s office, awaiting punishment. doosy but really, how hard on you can they be? ACTING HINTS STEVE: My dad’s going to kill me. Have you ever had to wait for something unpleasant? How did it affect you physically? Did it affect your breathing? EDGAR: Be serious. Steve is very nervous and Edgar is more relaxed. Show the opposing physical STEVE: Seriously he could kill me. states in the way the two characters move.  EDGAR: Not gonna happen. Think smaller-scale. There is a moment of silence as STEVE and EDGAR STEVE: I don’t know. Maybe he’ll hide all my shoes. sit. Waiting. They adjust their position. They both give a big sigh. EDGAR: “Son. We’ve decided your punishment. We’re going to hide all your shoes.” STEVE: How long have they been in there? STEVE: Just because your dad is all “Boys will be boys. Hey man, I EDGAR: Almost half an hour. was young once too. Peace out.”

STEVE: Half and hour. How long does it take to decide a EDGAR: I don’t know Brillo. I’ve never set fire to a bathroom punishment? Mrs. Dufour always struck me as a rather decisive before. My dad did a lot when he was young, but I’m pretty woman. Two weeks detention – zap! You’re suspended – pow! sure he never set fire to a bathroom.

EDGAR: Your dad is über-decisive. He’s the king of decisiveness. STEVE: But we didn’t mean to set fire to a bathroom.

STEVE: I know. Can I have the car, dad? No. Two seconds tops - EDGAR: If only that counted. whamo! What the hell are they talking about? STEVE: Who knew toilets were so flammable? EDGAR: Maybe they’re not talking about you. Maybe they wrapped up you in the first five minutes and now they’re talking about EDGAR: Hindsight is twenty-twenty. vacations. (STEVE looks at EDGAR) It’s possible. They could be STEVE: What are they doing in there? I wish they’d just come out and get it over with. Just come out right now and get whatever

Steve and Edgar Sam and Pat

it is, whatever punishment, out in the open. I just want to PLAY: School Daze know. The waiting is killing me! GENRE: Comedy EDGAR: Ah ha! Chinese water torture. I think there is no TIME: 2:00 punishment. They’re just sitting in there, making you sweat it  out. DESCRIPTION STEVE: (standing up) Enough is enough. This is inhuman. If they’re going to punish me, fine. Just come on out of there and do it. Sam and Pat stand side by side during their first lunch on their first day of Do you hear me?! I deserve to know. It’s my basic human right middle school. They don’t know each other, but both know what it’s like to be in an uncomfortable situation… to know and I want to know right now! ACTING HINTS EDGAR: Aw crap. The door’s opening. Sam and Pat are both nervous – they are in an unfamiliar territory. How can STEVE: (sitting down) I changed my mind. I can wait. you show their nerves? Focus on the pace of the scene. Their nervous behaviour should show through  the speed of their dialogue. But you can’t race through the whole scene! Find a place to take a big breath. Think about what would make the characters pause.  SAM and PAT are carrying cafeteria trays. They stand side by side in silence for a moment as if they are looking for a place to sit, but don’t know anyone in the cafeteria. Finally SAM breaks the silence.

SAM: Hi.

PAT: Hi.

SAM: First day.

PAT: Yep.

SAM: Lunch.

PAT: Yep.

SAM: You know anyone?

Sam and Pat Sam and Pat

PAT: Nope. bread peanut butter and lettuce sandwiches! There I said it. Shun me if you must! I like brown bread peanut butter and SAM: Me neither. lettuce sandwiches and my brother said I would be banished PAT: So… to outer Siberia in the school’s social standings if I showed up today with brown bread peanut butter and lettuce sandwiches. SAM: (jumping in) So nothing. I’m not saying anything. You. Me. Everyone would laugh at my lunch, which really means they’re Standing. Doesn’t mean squat. laughing at me which is so unfair but that’s the way life goes, Stevie says. So I didn’t bring one. And now I’m stuck with this, PAT: I didn’t… aren’t you trying to talk to me? this…

SAM: Why would I do that? You. Me. Standing. Doesn’t mean squat. PAT: Really gross food.

PAT: Are you freaking out? SAM: Really gross food. The pizza’s cold, I hate pudding and all I SAM: What? want is a brown bread peanut butter and lettuce sandwich.

PAT: Are you freaking out? PAT: Peanut butter and lettuce huh?

SAM: Me? Ha ha! Nooooooooo. SAM: Is it really that weird? Outer Siberia weird?

PAT: You look all funny round the eyes. PAT: A little.

SAM: I’m not freaking out. I’m not. SAM: Oh.

PAT: Ok. PAT: But so what?

SAM: I’m just not having a great day. That’s all. SAM: So what?

PAT: What happened? PAT: Yeah. So what?

SAM: What hasn’t? I’ve been late to every class because I keep SAM: Exactly. So what? Stupid Stevie and his stupid Siberia. So getting lost. I have absolutely no idea what’s going on in math what?! Do you want to sit down? and it’s just the first day! And my brother freaked me right PAT: Yeah. out– SAM: Great. What class do you have after lunch? PAT: You are freaking out. PAT: (with a groan) Math. I can’t stand it either. SAM: Who wouldn’t? We’re standing here like idiots and the whole cafeteria is filled with people talking and laughing and everyone SAM: Do you have Mrs. Rogers? She’s brutal. has friends and everyone’s in little groups and I like brown

Sam and Pat Marty & Edwin

PAT: You know… sometimes I eat condiment sandwiches. PLAY: School Daze

SAM: Condiment sandwiches? GENRE: Comedy TIME: 2:00 PAT: Mayo, relish, nothing else.  SAM: Now that is weird. DESCRIPTION They exit. Marty and Edwin are complete opposites forced to work together on a school  project. ACTING HINTS

This scene is quick, quick quick! The dialogue is snappy. It’s important that there aren’t any unnecessary pauses between lines. Both characters know exactly who they are and why they dislike the other person. That means you should make each character as clear as possible. Each should have a specific voice, movement, and personality.  MARTY and EDWIN run downstage. Both of them are trying to talk to their teacher. They face front as if their teacher is in the audience.

MARTY: Miss!

EDWIN: Mrs. Wheeler!

MARTY: Miss!

EDWIN: Mrs. Wheeler!

MARTY: Miss, Miss, Miss!

EDWIN: Mrs. Wheeler!

BOTH: I can’t work with him!

EDWIN: As much as I appreciate getting down to business right away…

Marty & Edwin Marty & Edwin

MARTY: (with a groan) I can’t believe you’re starting a project on the EDWIN: And what’s your average slug? first day of school. MARTY: Want to know what my black eye average is? EDWIN: And the depression is a worthy topic… EDWIN: Mrs. Wheeler! MARTY: And you ruined my whole year in one shot! BOTH: I can’t work with him! AGH! BOTH: I can’t work with him! They both throw their hands up and separate. EDWIN: I know slugs with more brainpower. EDWIN talks to the audience.

MARTY: His name is Edwin. EDWIN: My brain is growing at an incredible rate and this is what I have to put up with. I’m 12, but I’m not 12. Sometimes I wish EDWIN: What’s wrong with my name? I was 12. Sometimes I like being smart. I like using my mind, MARTY: I can’t work with a guy named Edwin. (realising something) speed of light, fast as I can go. Is it my fault I’m smart? I want Did you just call me a slug? to start skipping grades, but my parents want me to be more normal. I’m not normal! EDWIN: Mrs. Wheeler, I already know what’s going to transpire. MARTY: He is not a normal guy. He wears ties to school. Ties. He MARTY: Can’t I work with Rob? knows EVERYTHING and I hate that! Just once I would like to know something that he doesn’t know. My dad is so intense EDWIN: I’m going to get stuck with all the work. about grades. Like I won’t get into a good school if I don’t get MARTY: Or Max? good grades now. All I want to do is play baseball. At least that’s one thing I’m better at than Mr. Brain. EDWIN: I ALWAYS get stuck with the work. They return to the centre. They look up and sigh. MARTY: Or Sonny? MARTY: All right Miss. Whatever. EDWIN: He’s not going to do anything. EDWIN: I don’t agree with your argument Mrs. Wheeler, but I will MARTY: Or Luis? acquiesce to your demands.

EDWIN: Because he never does anything. MARTY: Can you speak normally, just once?

MARTY: Or Jenny. I’d work with Jenny. EDWIN: No. I can’t. All right. I will work with him. Somehow.

EDWIN: And my average is going to suffer greatly! MARTY: Can I call you Eddie?

MARTY: Ooooh Mr. Brain will get an A instead of an A plus. EDWIN: No. Tragedy. 

Catherine, Cosette, Julian

PLAY: Beauty and the Bee GENRE: Drama TIME: 4:15  DESCRIPTION

Cosette, Catherine and Julian are siblings. Cosette, a home-schooled national spelling bee champion has been preparing to attending high school, much to  the dismay of Catherine, her older sister. Cosette has asked Catherine for help fitting in, but Catherine hasn’t been exactly honest with her… ACTING HINTS

This is a high-conflict, high-emotion scene. Cosette and Catherine are ina cutthroat battle with each other. There should be a lot of movement between Group the two girls and their dialogue at the beginning should be quick. Keep them physically on the move as they interact. On the other hand, Julian is completely calm. He moves and speaks slowly. He is in his own world, totally focused on his corn dog. Don’t let Julian get caught up in his sisters’ energy. He should move in slow motion, which will bring a Scenes nice contrast to the scene.  COSETTE: (offstage) Don’t you walk away from me!

CATHERINE storms in with COSETTE close behind.  During all of this, JULIAN is oblivious.

NOTE: don’t yell too much here or the scene will have nowhere to go! Note too that there is some overlapping of lines here.

CATHERINE: Can we not have a scene in the food court? (hissing) I work in this mall.

COSETTE: Oh poor Catherine. Afraid you’ll stand out?

CATHERINE: (start right after ‘Catherine’) This was such a mistake.

Catherine, Cosette, Julian Catherine, Cosette, Julian

COSETTE: Why did you do that to me? spine lookers! (to JULIAN) She ignored me in the store. She was talking to one of her pretty perfect types and I came up CATHERINE: You’re so smart, figure it out. and she ignored me.

COSETTE: You’re embarrassed of me. CATHERINE: You were blathering.

CATHERINE: (start right after ‘embarrassed’) Ding, ding, ding! Smarty COSETTE: She said she didn’t know me. wins a prize. CATHERINE: You said Capris are named after an Italian island. COSETTE: (start right after ‘Smarty’) I’d rather be smart than stupid. COSETTE: It’s an interesting fact. JULIAN takes a bite of his corn dog and gives a long loud groan, completely derailing the fight. CATHERINE: No one cares! No one cares about you Cosette!

JULIAN: I LOVE the Buggy Buggy corn dog. It’s the extra Buggy COSETTE: (explodes into a spell out start after ‘No one cares’) that’s the trick. And the fake cheese… nothing in this whole Amanuensis: A-M-A-N-U-E-N-S-I-S. Take that Cathy! wide world beats fake cheese. Fake cheese oozing through Amaranth: A-M-A-R-A-N-T-H. I’m causing a scene in the mall! the dough. That’s the best. The ultimate. That chemical rush, whoosh, right through the veins. Amazing. Totally. Dude. CATHERINE: (start after ‘Take that Cathy’) Don’t call me Cathy! How did you get the pretty name! It is so wasted on you! AGH! CATHERINE and COSETTE stare at JULIAN. He (finally it all comes out) High school is going to hit you like a looks up. ton of bricks and the fall out is going to end up on me. I hate that you’re going to my school. The only place I have! I hate JULIAN: What? You guys want some? You better dig in. I save corn everyone’s going to know you’re my sister. Everyone pays so dog for no one. much attention to you just because you’re smart and nobody CATHERINE: Do you really not have any idea what’s happening could give a crap about anything that I do. (frustrated) Nobody here? cares about what I want!

JULIAN: Why? (he looks at both of them) Is something up? I’m pretty COSETTE: (fast) Then why did you even bother to help me? focused on the dog. Ever since M & D said we had to come JULIAN: (fast, almost unconsciously) Cause Mom’s paying her. together and I was nacho denied yesterday… (staring at the corn dog) Fake cheese. (breaking out of the trance again) Sorry. Silence. CATHERINE drops her head into her hands, What? COSETTE stares at JULIAN.

CATHERINE: (sitting) She called me stupid. JULIAN: (disbelief) Did I say that out loud? (quiet) Damn. (pause) I’ve been keeping that a secret. (pause) I didn’t want to. But I did. COSETTE: (sitting) She completely ignored me! You’re going to Looks like the fake cheese got the best of me. Fake cheese ignore me at school too aren’t you. You’re one of those, icy makes you say strange things. Makes you speak the truth

Catherine, Cosette, Julian Catherine, Cosette, Julian

when you don’t want to or you do want to. This cheese is CATHERINE: So… what? messing with my brain waves. (starting to panic) The chemicals are changing me, man. Making me say things, making me do COSETTE: So what what? things… they’re changing me! (standing) I gotta find some fruit CATHERINE: What now? Do you still want help? Fitting in? leather. COSETTE: I think… No. I… I’m going to go it alone. JULIAN runs off. There is a long pause. CATHERINE: But what if you - COSETTE: (she sits in a daze) Whoa. COSETTE: You’re right, everybody’s right, I live in a sweater vest CATHERINE: You weren’t supposed to find out. bubble. So what? Should I stay put? Stay where it’s warm and COSETTE: I thought you and Mom didn’t get along. comfortable in my sweatery bubble just so I don’t get a little wind burn? To make everybody else happy? I got all caught up. CATHERINE: We don’t. She… She doesn’t talk to me. Discombobulated. You know?

COSETTE: You figured all this out through hand signals? How Helen CATHERINE: Not a clue. Keller of you. JULIAN enters. CATHERINE: I… (she tries to explain and fails) When she came to me, she never does that. (vulnerable) She’s never done that. JULIAN: (satisfied sigh) Who knew soy nuts could taste so good? Ok, She doesn’t even talk to me, not since I quit… (spilling out) are we out of here? And I need the money for school, and when she came to me… COSETTE: I want to get some pizza before we go. Two slices. With She’s never done that. I don’t… (she exhales) There are a lot of artichoke and anchovies. things going on, Cosette. JULIAN: Artichoke and anchovies? Whoa. COSETTE: (pause) I think Catherine’s a pretty name. COSETTE: (with a smile) I know. CATHERINE: (she rolls her eyes) Everyone shortens it to Cathy.  COSETTE: She doesn’t talk to you?

CATHERINE: You’re the winner.

COSETTE: (she wrinkles her nose) I just like to spell. What time is Dad coming to pick us up?

CATHERINE: I don’t know. (she pulls out her phone) Now.

COSETTE: Ok… (she stands) We should go.

Drift, Blue, Ice Drift, Blue, Ice

PLAY: The Snow Show BLUE: That’s an image.

GENRE: Comedy ICE: (firm) No we’re not. TIME: 3:15 DRIFT: (pouting and imitating ICE) ‘We’re excellent skiers. We’re the  best darn skiers in the whole world. Watch us ski down the DESCRIPTION hardest slope?’ (he blows a raspberry at ICE)

Three friends are at the top of the scariest, most difficult ski hill to impress BLUE: (to ICE) I told you he didn’t want to do this. some girls. ICE: Was he imitating me? ACTING HINTS BLUE: I think so. Keep the environment in mind during the scene – they are at the top of a mountain. What’s the weather like? DRIFT: Don’t mind me, I’m just here, fearing for my life at the top The boys have gone to great extremes to impress some girls. But none of of… What’s this thing called again? them are great skiers and the weight of their hasty decision comes home during the scene. Each of the boys reacts differently to their situation – Drift BLUE: Stinking Dogface. is sarcastic, Blue tries to be confident, and Ice mellowly goes with the flow. Each character’s reaction to the situation should be reflected physically. How DRIFT: Stinking Dogface. Mount Stinking Dogface. do they stand at the top of the mountain?  BLUE: It’s rather descriptive. Creates a real specific image right away. Excellent marketing. BLUE, ICE and DRIFT stand side-by-side. DRIFT stands in the middle. They are standing on the top DRIFT: Let’s give them a medal. of a huge ski hill. They look down. BLUE: Do they do that? DRIFT: (irritated) Why are we doing this again? ICE: What do you want? Those girls liked us. They liked US. They BLUE: It looks cold. were talking to us. I couldn’t help myself. They asked if we skied and they smiled. ICE: It would. BLUE: (remembering) Those smiles were something. DRIFT: What are we doing here? ICE: They smiled with their eyes. BLUE: Skiing. BLUE: (with a sigh) Those eyes were something. ICE: Standing. ICE: How could I say anything but yes? DRIFT: (very irritated) Fearing for our lives.

Drift, Blue, Ice Drift, Blue, Ice

DRIFT: There is the grand canyon of difference between ‘Yes, I can BLUE: We will make it down this hill. ski’ and ‘Yes, I can ski Smelly Dogface.’ ICE: (to DRIFT) You too. Say it! BLUE: Stinking Dogface. BLUE & DRIFT: We will make it down this hill! DRIFT: I hope they still like us when we’re in body casts. ICE: Louder! BLUE: I thought we were going to do the Bunny Hill. BLUE & DRIFT: We will make it down this hill. ICE: You can’t impress a girl with the Bunny Hill. ICE: We will conquer Stinking Dogface! DRIFT: (imitating) ‘Everybody skis. We have to ski.’ (back to self) Just because we have a ski hill in our town doesn’t mean we have BLUE & DRIFT: We will conquer Stinking Dogface! to follow the pied piper. And you with your eyes and your ICE: Beat Dogface! smiles. We so could have done the Bunny Hill. ALL THREE: Beat Dogface! Beat Dogface! Beat Dogface! Beat BLUE: Sorry Slope. Dogface!

DRIFT: What? They cheer and high-five each other. They have big BLUE: The Bunny Hill. It’s called Sorry Slope. smiles on their faces.

ICE: I’m telling you right now. Those girls would not have liked us if BLUE: I feel great! we said we were going down Sorry Slope. DRIFT: Do you really think we have a chance? Can we actually ski BLUE: We could have done Malevolent Moguls. Or The Hideous this hill and get those girls? Holler. ICE: (cheerful) Not a snowball’s chance in hell.

DRIFT: Who names these runs? DRIFT: Oh.

BLUE: Marketing mavens, I’m telling you. ICE: It’s all right. Win some, lose some.

DRIFT: I hate this. DRIFT: Right.

ICE: Why are you so pessimistic, huh? Maybe we CAN do it. Maybe ICE: There will be other girls. we can make it down this hill. Maybe we can take the light from those girls’ eyes and absorb it. Like osmosis. We take the DRIFT: Other girls. energy from their smiles and it will transform us into expert skiers. (he takes a deep breath) I can feel it. I feel that energy. There’s a pause. We will make it down this hill. Say it with me. We will make it down this hill.

Drift, Blue, Ice Nicola et al

BLUE: But what do we do now? PLAY: Football Romeo

DRIFT: We stay here and freeze to death or get eaten by animals. GENRE: Serio-Comedy TIME: 2:30 ICE: Why am I friends with you?  DRIFT: Or we go down. Face first probably. With many broken limbs and abrasions along the way. DESCRIPTION Nicola and her friends are making plans to replace the lead in the school play BLUE: I’m not seeing a happy ending here. with Nicola’s boyfriend. But Rick is no longer interested in the play and speaks his mind for the first time. ICE: We could scream for help and the snow patrol will come get us. After which we’ll have to suffer the lingering and constant ACTING HINTS humiliation for years to come that we were rescued. Nicola is the leader and the other girls agree to anything she says. Pay attention to April’s dialogue, she is much more ‘harsh’ than the other girls. BLUE: And no girls. How do the other girls react to April? ICE: Nope. This is the first time Rick tells the truth and speaks out against Nicola. How do the girls react? Nicola should be shocked. Why does Rick choose this exact BLUE: That’s a quandary. moment to speak out?  ICE: What? The setting is NICOLA’s living room. BRITTANY, BLUE: Problem. FELICITY, and APRIL gather around NICOLA, ICE: So why not say problem? consoling her. RICK is off to the side, asleep.

BLUE: I’m a man of many depths. NICOLA: I can’t kiss Danny Dinning.

ICE: Since when? APRIL: I hate Danny Dinning.

DRIFT: I hate to interrupt the word of the day discussion, but… NICOLA: I don’t hate him. There’s just something fundamentally (pause) What do we do? wrong in the universe if I have to kiss him.

ICE: Well… APRIL: I hate him. We can’t just sit idly by while the Danny Dinnings of the world kiss our cheerleaders! The three look at each other for a moment. BRITTANY & FELICITY: Wow. ALL THREE: HELP!!!!!!!!!! APRIL: What? What’s wrong with me now! 

Nicola et al Nicola et al

FELICITY: You’re so testy. RICK exits.

APRIL: Of course I am! We have to do something to Danny Dinning NICOLA: Rick. Rick! He’s never walked out on me before. He’s and we have to do it quick. never been angry at me before. This is not the way it’s supposed to go. BRITTANY: If only we could make him drop out. APRIL: Forget about him. Once we get him the part, he’ll change his FELICITY: But then how do we get Rick in his place? mind completely. He’ll love being Romeo to your Juliet.

NICOLA: Rick. Rick! NICOLA: (with a sigh) I guess.

RICK: (waking up) What what what? BRITTANY: You know, he is kind of, sort of, right. I mean the only NICOLA: You have to pay attention. reason we auditioned is because you wanted us to. We’ve never liked theatre before and especially not Shakespeare. RICK: To what? Why are we fighting for this? Rick doesn’t want to be in the play. April doesn’t want to play a boy and you don’t want to NICOLA: We’re making plans. kiss Danny Dinning. Why don’t we just… let it go.

APRIL: We’re going to get Danny Dinning kicked out of the play and NICOLA: Let it go. make you Romeo. BRITTANY: Let it go. NICOLA: You have to listen. FELICITY: Let it go? RICK: I don’t care. BRITTANY: Let it go. NICOLA: You have to care. APRIL: Are you mental? This isn’t about a stupid play anymore. This RICK: (he gives a sigh) Nicola. I don’t care about the stupid play. is about the defiance of human nature. The mixing of cliques. NICOLA: What? He’s not one of us and we shouldn’t have to breathe the same air as him, let alone be in the same play. RICK: I’m glad I’m not in it. I don’t know why you think it’s so important you’re in it or your friends are in it. None of us NICOLA: April, isn’t that a bit extreme? wanted to audition. They only did… I only did cause you made APRIL: It shouldn’t be allowed! Can’t you see? We have to defend me. I’m glad I don’t have to be Romeo. our rights as perfect people. Are you with me? Are you with NICOLA: But Rick - us or against us? Either you’re all in, or you’re out.

RICK: I don’t want to talk about it anymore! I have things to do. I’ll FELICITY: I’m in. see you later. BRITTANY: I’m in, I’m in.

Nicola et al Monica et al

APRIL: Then tomorrow before the first readthrough, we strike! PLAY: Oddball

NICOLA: Well, we’ll talk to Ms. Kavendish. GENRE: Serio-comic TIME: 4:30 APRIL: Same diff.  FELICITY: Now that’s settled, who wants ice-cream? DESCRIPTION BRITTANY: Oooooh I’m in the mood for chocolate chip. Monica’s friends want to confront Monica over her boyfriend. But Monica is FELICITY: Cherry cheesecake! not interested in what they have to say. She’s ready, willing and able to stand up for her boyfriend. BRITTANY: I love cherry cheesecake! ACTING HINTS  All the girls in this scene have strong wants. Brynn and the girls want Monica to break up with Dennis. Monica wants to stay with Dennis. What happens when these opposing wants conflict? How do the girls react? Since this is a scene with five girls of the same age, make sure you give each a different personality. What makes each girl unique? Make it easy to tell them apart on stage.  The GIRLS gather together, laughing.

MONICA: That was fun.

BRYNN: That was great.

TISHA: My stomach hurts.

ZOE: No wonder.

HAILEY: You’re the one who ordered the large nachos.

ZOE: And ate them all.

TISHA: I couldn’t help it! They were so good.

They all laugh.

Monica et al Monica et al

MONICA: Anyone want to go to the mall? I don’t have to be home HAILEY: Monica, (she takes a deep and tragic breath) we need to talk till 10. to you.

The other GIRLS stop, and look at each other. MONICA: (wary) Ok.

BRYNN: Sure! ZOE: About Dennis.

ZOE: (elbowing BRYNN) Actually…. TISHA: We’re not mad.

BRYNN: Oh. Right. HAILEY: No, we’re not mad at you.

MONICA: Right what? BRYNN: That’s very important.

HAILEY: We’re doing this now? TISHA: You need to know Monica, we are not mad.

ZOE: Now. MONICA: What does Dennis have to do with being mad at me? Did something happen? MONICA: Now what? GIRLS: No! ZOE: We have to talk to you Monica. TISHA No, no. BRYNN: In the parking lot? BRYNN: Nothing’s happened. ZOE: We can’t stop now, we started. It’s not fair to say ‘we need to talk’ and then stop. If it’s in the parking lot then it’s in the ZOE: Well, yes. parking lot. HAILEY: Yes. MONICA: What’s going on? TISHA: Something very serious. ZOE: We need to talk to you. ZOE: We’re taking this seriously, Monica. BRYNN: Why didn’t we do this in the restaurant? BRYNN: But we’re not mad. ZOE: Because that was fun time. This is serious time. HAILEY: Not at all. MONICA: Serious about what? BRYNN: We love you. TISHA: Since when are parking lots serious? GIRLS: With all our hearts. ZOE: Look, we started. That’s it. Hailey? MONICA: Ok…

Monica et al Monica et al

BRYNN: It feels so wrong to do this in a parking lot. ZOE: I thought we decided harsh was good.

HAILEY: Shhh! HAILEY: Soft start, soft start.

ZOE: Ok. How long have we been friends? TISHA: Soft start, end harsh.

TISHA: Forever. BRYNN: We didn’t get to the end.

ZOE: (linking her fingers together) Together forever. TISHA: We’re in the middle.

HAILEY: (linking her fingers together) Forever together. BRYNN: You jumped.

AUTUMN: (linking fingers) Since the third grade. ZOE: So what’s the middle?

ZOE: There are no closer friends than us. TISHA: Uuuuuuuuuh Hailey?

MONICA: (confused.) Am I dying? HAILEY: I forget.

ZOE: No! BRYNN: We talked about it.

BRYNN: Nothing like that. HAILEY: We should have written it down.

HAILEY: Not serious like that. MONICA: What’s going on?

TISHA: That’s way serious. HAILEY: It won’t hurt too much.

HAILEY: We’d never do something like that in a parking lot. TISHA: How could it?

BRYNN: We shouldn’t be doing this in a parking lot. ZOE: Just rip him out of your life like a band aid.

HAILEY: Shh! BRYNN: One swift motion.

ZOE: This is different serious. TISHA: It’s all for the best.

TISHA: Way serious in a completely different way. MONICA: I – I’m not dumping Dennis.

ZOE: You have to dump your boyfriend. THE GIRLS draw back.

MONICA: What? MONICA: I’m not dumping him. Why would I?

BRYNN: It’s ok, don’t freak out! Zoe, that was harsh! THE GIRLS look at each other and then at MONICA.

Monica et al Monica et al

ZOE: But, but, but, ZOE: Ah ha! That’s our point!

GIRLS: You have to! TISHA: You’re spending time with him and not with us.

HAILEY: (to TISHA) Were we clear? MONICA: He’s pretty sure he’s not welcome.

TISHA: I thought we were clear. HAILIEY: What do you mean?

ZOE: The middle should have been harsh. I wasn’t wrong. MONICA: You know what I mean.

TISHA: Maybe we were too soft. BRYNN: We’re not snobs.

ZOE: Dump your boyfriend, how much clearer could we be? ZOE: We’re not.

MONICA: I’m not dumping him. BRYNN: We welcome everybody.

BRYNN: But Monica, you have to! TISHA: We just don’t like him.

MONICA: Why? HAILEY: And don’t want him dating our friend.

GIRLS: Because! ZOE: And you should dump him.

ZOE: It’s obvious. MONICA: (she shrugs and shakes her head) Sorry.

MONICA: How so? GIRLS: But, but, but,

ZOE: We girls, we fit. she( links her fingers together) We are a group. BRYNN: This is stupid!

HAILEY: Together forever, since the third grade. TISHA: She’s not getting it.

TISHA: And we go out with guys who fit with us. she( links her ZOE: Harsh middle, harsh middle! fingers together) HAILEY: Monica you have to see him how we do. MONICA: Ah. TISHA: (drawing a picture frame in the air) See him. BRYNN: I think she gets it. BRYNN: The hair. MONICA: Oh I get it. TISHA: And the glasses. HAILEY: Dennis doesn’t fit. ZOE: And laugh. MONICA: He fits with me.

Monica et al Monica et al

HAILEY: And the computers. MONICA is the only one left standing. She looks at them and shakes her head. She pauses before she ZOE: And the message T’s. speaks.

HAILEY: But not cute message T’s. MONICA: I could dump him. I could change him, I could make him GIRLS: And the lizard. into someone more acceptable to you.

MONICA: One time. One time he talked about the lizard! The GIRLS all look up with hope.

ZOE: The lizard is bad! ZOE: Would you?

MONICA: You asked about his hobbies! HAILEY: For us?

ZOE: I meant scrapbooking! MONICA: No.

MONICA: He doesn’t scrapbook! TISHA: But why?

ZOE: He should have lied! MONICA: I don’t want to.

MONICA: He likes lizards. That’s his thing. The GIRLS all sink down to the floor.

THE GIRLS all gross out. MONICA: Because he’s kind. And he’s funny. And he loves me. He loves me. Bubble-headed Monica. Mall loving Monica. Silly, TISHA: Don’t you see how bad that is? You shouldn’t know about stupid Monica. He tells me I’m beautiful. He loves to go on lizards. dates. He brings me romantic snacks. Why would I want that to change? ZOE: You’re making us mental. The GIRLS get up slowly. HAILEY: We can’t stand it anymore. BRYNN: What kind of romantic snacks? ZOE: You have to dump him. MONICA: Heart shaped jujubees. HAILEY: You’re ruining our lives! BRYNN: Awwwwwww. GIRLS: Dump him, dump him, dump him! ZOE: Brynn! MONICA: No! MONICA: (she walks away a couple of steps) So. Are we done? Can THE GIRLS scream and fall all over each other, and we leave the parking lot and go to the mall? land in a heap on the ground, breathing heavily.

Monica et al Appendix

BRYNN: Yes. Competing in the Duet Acting category of Individual Events? Here are some hints and tips! ZOE: Brynn! Choosing a Scene BRYNN: (moving to stand beside MONICA) I hate the stupid parking lot. When choosing a scene, look for the following: Features both actors. Avoid pieces comprising of a series of monologues TISHA: (moving to stand beside MONICA) Brent never brings me for one actor with one line responses for the other. romantic snacks. A defined relationship between characters. You want something to work with in your scene and a defined relationship is the first place to start. ZOE: Tisha! • Look for a power struggle. HAILEY: (moving to stand beside MONICA) I love jujubees. • Look for interaction. Is there lots of back and forth? • What is the connection between the characters? MONICA: Zoe? • Look for conflict. Remember, conflict is not just two people fighting! BRYNN: Come on Zoey. • Look for opposing personalities. ZOE stands alone. She looks like she’s really Simple blocking. Your chosen piece should offer a few simple but strong physical choices. struggling with her decision and pauses before she speaks. Read the whole play. How can you properly prepare the scene if you don’t know what’s happened to the characters earlier in the play? ZOE: Do I have to……. touch the lizard? Make sure the scene is the right length. If you’re competing with your scene there’s nothing worse than going over time! Choose a scene that is MONICA: I most solemnly swear that your hand will never come WELL under the designated time limit. That way you have time to play with within a hundred feet of any lizard. Together forever? pacing and pauses. Like the scene. It’s important to like your character, like what’s going on ZOE: (with a smile) Forever. between the two characters, like the scenario. The more you like the scene, the more you’re going to want to work on it and make it the best it can be.  The dislike of a scene easily leads to a poor performance. Competition Do’s And Don’t’s

Performing a scene is not like performing a monologue. You have to trust your partner and your partner has to trust you. Make sure you’re both on the same page! • DO know the rules and instructions. There’s no excuse for not knowing the parameters of the competition. Go over them with your partner. • DON’T be late! Better yet, be early.

Appendix

• DO arrive together. The nerves always go into overdrive when Theatrefolk an actor wonders where their partner is! Original Playscripts • DO take care with your appearance. You and your partner are PO Box 1064, Crystal Beach, ON, Canada L0S 1B0 a team, and you should dress as a team. If you’re in a nice dress and your partner is in ripped jeans, it looks like you haven’t properly Tel 1-866-245-9138 / Fax 1-877-245-9138 prepared. Further to that, DON’T wear jeans that hang below your Email [email protected] / Web www.theatrefolk.com butt. DON’T wear belly shirts and mini skirts. DON’T wear clanky jewelry or flip flops. Make it easy for the judges to focus on your acting and not what you’re wearing. • DON’T make last minute changes. Your partner comes up to you the morning of the competition and bubbles, ‘I have the perfect blocking for the scene!’ Resist, resist, resist. Keep your scene as you’ve rehearsed it. Start changing the blocking and it’s a quick hop to forgetting your lines at the worst moment. Stick with what you know. • DO warm up with your partner. This is a scene, not a Visit us online! monologue. You both need to be in the same head space. Take deep breaths together. Do the mirror exercise. The more together you www.theatrefolk.com are before competition, the better your performance will be. • DO be respectful of the other actors. Remember they’re »» ONLINE ORDERING probably feeling exactly the same way you do! DON’T talk to your partner during other performances. DON’T criticize other »» UP-TO-DATE CATALOGUE performers. DON’T brag to each other. • DO be respectful of your partner. If you’re a nervous talker »» ROYALTY INFORMATION and your partner has not so politely asked you to be quiet, now is not the time to pick a fight! Talk to them about it after the scene. »» COMPANY BACKGROUND Remember, your partner has their own way of dealing with their nerves. • DON’T forget to practice your intro and DO remember who the playwright is! You’ll start the judges off on the wrong foot if you’re sloppy before you’ve started. It makes you look like you don’t care about your acting. • DO keep going if things go wrong. What if one of you jumps a page or blanks out? What if you’re the one who blanks? If you stop then the judges have to stop too; they’ll know for sure you’ve made a mistake. • DO have fun!

Th e Mi d d l e Sc h o o l Sc e n e Bo o k Edited by Lindsay Price

A collection of comedic, character-driven, and challenging scenes for the middle school students. Perfect for classwork or for IE Competitions.

ISBN 978-1-926533-20-9

Theatrefolk Original Playscripts PO Box 1064, Crystal Beach, ON, Canada L0S 1B0 Tel 1-866-245-9138 / Fax 1-877-245-9138 Email [email protected] / Web www.theatrefolk.com 9 781926 533209