“You Can Be a People Person” Allan Pole on Saturday Evening, February 20Th, 2021
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“You Can Be a People Person” Allan Pole on Saturday evening, February 20th, 2021 Theme: The key is to develop an appealing personality that causes others to respond to you. Text: Philippians 2:3-11 Here’s a thought: Ralph Waldo Emerson observed, "The reason why anyone refuses his assent to your opinion, or his aid to your benevolent design, is in you. He refuses to accept you as a bringer of truth, because you have not given him the authentic sign." I recommend to you the book “Be a People Person” by John C. Maxwell. I would like to share with you some things I learned from him, from the Bible, from the Holy Spirit and from my own relationships and observations. The greatest leaders have it - that special quality which cause people to be drawn to their magnetic personalities. Extraordinary entertainers exude what we think is something extra, something beyond our grasp. We all have the potential to cultivate this quality that makes the difference between personality and personality plus. What quality would draw others to us? We can summarize it in one word: charisma. Charisma can be a difficult subject to discuss because most people think it is a mystical, elusive, undefinable quality that you either have or don't have. Webster's dictionary defines "charisma" as: An extraordinary power in a person, group, cause etc. which takes hold of popular imagination and wins popular support. The Bible describes charisma differently in the person of Jesus Christ. The Apostle Paul summarizes the best people person that has ever lived in Philippians 2:3-11: 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, 7 but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death - even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. NIV According to Philippians 2:3-11 a person with charisma is one who has: C - Charity (2:3a) H - Humility (2:3b) A - Altruism (2:4) R - Radiance (2:5) I - Identity (2:6) S - Servant's Heart (2:7) M - Mouldability (2:8) A - Approval (2:9-11) C - Charity (2:3a - Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit) Put simply, charismatic people are helpers. They are out to see others profit - they carry the gift of grace. In fact, the Greek word for gift is "charisma" (singular) or “charismata” (plural), meaning "gift or gifts of grace." God has freely bestowed upon us spiritual gifts because of His grace toward us. In Romans 12:4-6 we are reminded: 4 Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5 so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. 6 We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. NIV Note the context here is a description of the variety of gifts that are given for the sake of helping others. There is no charisma in seclusion. You can't walk into a room and have charisma by yourself! People have problems. Many are like the beleaguered guy who, in desperation, went to a psychiatrist for help. He told the doctor, "Every time I get my act together, the curtain falls down." He needed more than mercy and concern; he needed help. You will find that if you are good at solving problems, people will want to be around you. What can you do to help people with their problems? First of all, encourage them to face their problems. Too often people would rather flee them, fight them, or forget them. Second, encourage them to solve their problems. Use the following acrostic to teach yourself to help people with difficulties: T - Tell them it takes time. E - Expose yourself to their problems in order to relate to them. A - Assure them of your confidence in them. C - Creatively show them how to deal with their problems. H - Offer hope to them through the process. A young lady boarded the bus after the lights had gone out. A tall man standing near her asked if he could help her find a strap to hold on to. "Thank you," she replied, "but I have already found one." With all the self-control he could muster he snapped, "Then I wonder if you would mind letting go of my necktie!" "No man is an island unto himself." This is certainly true for followers of Jesus. Yes, we are called to love the Lord our God. Our call extends also to love our neighbour as ourselves. It is no coincidence that the Old English word for love is charity, for love is made evident by her deeds. According to Philippians 2:3-11 a person with charisma is one who has: C - Charity (2:3a) H - Humility (2:3b - In humility consider others better than yourselves) A proud person will look down on other people, feeling a sense of superiority. People will not follow or identify with a snobbish personality who is conscious of status and position. We have some stereotypical images of charismatic people, but Jesus was not a flamboyant person. In Matthew 13:53-56 we read: 53 When Jesus had finished these parables, he moved on from there. 54 Coming to his hometown, he began teaching the people in their synagogue, and they were amazed. "Where did this man get this wisdom and these miraculous powers?" they asked. 55 "Isn't this the carpenter's son? Isn't his mother's name Mary, and aren't his brothers James, Joseph, Simon and Judas? 56 Aren't all his sisters with us? Where then did this man get all these things?" NIV Jesus did not try to prove Himself to people by flexing His spiritual muscles. His miracles were not done to impress or wow people. They were done out of a heartfelt concern for the needs of others. Even with the aura that surrounded Him and actually stunned some people, He was still a very common looking man of very humble means. In a society that cries out for flashiness and glamour we are called by God to humility. This is not to say we are to be unnecessarily drab, uncreative or sloppy. It is to say that our motivation for anything we say or do should be to make Jesus famous, not ourselves. According to Philippians 2:3-11 a person with charisma is one who has: C - Charity (2:3a) H - Humility (2:3b) A - Altruism (2:4 – look to the interests of others) One who walks with God will inevitably become more considerate of the needs and interests of others. As we come to understand the heart of the Father, we will see the importance of reaching out to other people. People with charisma show concern for people's deepest needs and interests. This doesn't mean charismatic people are mushy or patronizing, but when you are around them, you sense their interest and care and leave them feeling that you are valued and respected. At any gathering you will find two types of people - those who arrive with an attitude of "Here I am!" and those who possess an attitude of "There you are!" It doesn't take long to notice that people flock to the "There you are!" people. Be more concerned about making others feel good about themselves than you are in making them feel good about you. In other words, don't try to sell other people on you, try to sell them on who Christ can make them. If you need to develop greater concern for others in your life, increase your exposure to hurting people. We see Jesus' sense of concern in Matthew 9:35- 38: 35 Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. 36 When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. 37 Then he said to his disciples, "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. 38 Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field." NIV Here's the sequence: Jesus went, saw, felt and cared. It's only when we go and expose ourselves to various situations that we will see enough to develop the concern necessary to move us to action. Only when we go and see will we feel and do. According to Philippians 2:3-11 a person with charisma is one who has: C - Charity (2:3a) H - Humility (2:3b) A - Altruism (2:4) R - Radiance (2:5 – Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus) An accurate gauge of our spiritual well-being is our attitude.