The Drink Tank Issue 71 Y’All!!! Of. There were other documnetary shows about the paranormal, but none with the effect and scope of In Search Of. They actually went to the trouble of getting real psychics and doing real investigations into the unusual. While not every episode dealt with and ghouls, some of the better eps were about Amelia Earhart, Simon Wiesenthal tracking Josef Mengele & the Crystal Skull. The episodes were wonderful, the ones I remember best. There are only about a half-dozen ghost episodes, but the Ghost Photos and the Haunted House stake-out are in my top ten (along with Sasquatch, Jesse James, Jack the Ripper and UFOs). It’s easy to see In Search Of’s effects, as it led to a major rush of shows like That’s Incredible and the second Ripley’s Believe it or Not. These shows weren’t all about ghosts and the like, but they did use them fairly often. The producers of That’s Incredible took a cue from two shows: In Search Of and Real over US Minor Cable, and it’s already The Power of Paranormal TV People. I remember a lot of these shows started with ABC Family in October by as they were my faves as a kid. As an and Travel Channel on Friday Nights. Christopher J. Garcia adult, when they replayed them, the It’s not the first time, as things that I’d illustrations by Charlie Irons Vincent Van Gogh episode was actually call Paranormal TV have been on the very touching. air since the 1970s, though specials As I understand it, Paranormal The 1980s saw a bunch of about ghosts and other strange things TV has basically taken over Living small specials, but documentary have popped up since the first days of TV out the way of most Everlasting shows weren’t popular again until network TV. Club members, which means the UK. the 1990s. There were things like Probably the first example that This is being talked about in US TV Arthur C. Clarke’s Mysterious World, many folks would think of is In Search circles as the next thing that will take Haunted Hotels of The USA, James Randi: Psychic Investigator and a reaction. I didn’t see the show until fascination with Chillingham. show or two that weren’t well after I was in college. In fact, they In late 2000, MTV did a really American that we saw on stations showed it along with playing parts of inventive show called Fear. In many like Discovery around the Halloween Orson Welles’ War of the Worlds in the ways, it was a game show where a season, but nothing regular really. Psychology of Media class I took. It was group of college-aged kids had to The Amazing Randi was a bummer great stuff, really well-produced and spend the night in a haunted location as he was all about debunking stuff. actually scary. doing all sorts of challenges. They Sylvia Browne, a friend of my Dad’s That started a wave of new often used real haunted locations (and from back in those days, used to pop shows in the UK. The best show that places featured in ghostly movies, up on all sorts of shows, including started being produced in the genre like Danvers Mental Hospital) to Donahue. Though you could find it if around this time was Sightings. There make people think they were really you looked, it was really a Paranormal was already Unsolved Mysteries, which facing ghosts. It was a good show for TV wasteland. only showed Paranormal things once entertainment, but it had nothing to do Then there was Ghostwatch in a while, but it wasn’t until after the with paranormal research. I did love it, in 1992. Talk about the BIG Ghostwatch incident that really sent though. announcement of what was to come. things on towards actual definable This led to the Basically, Ghostwatch was what Paranormal TV. Sightings was hosted era, where Derek Acourah and Yvette Blair Witch would be seven years later. by Tim White and it was all about the Fieldling lead teams into real haunted The idea was so simple, a group did an Paranormal. Ghost, ESP, Loch Ness, houses, with its follow-ons like I’m investigation of a haunted house and Bigfoot, you name it, it was there. Famous and I’m Frightened and all found a ghost named Pipes. They then Sightings also had a great website those other ones. In the UK, it’s all did a seance and it ended up with the which is now gone but it was really a about LivingTV, in the US, it’s the ghost running wild and even invading wonderful place to go to for Paranormal Travel Channel that does all the the BBC studio. They used real BBC info. shows, especially things like Haunted personalities to get it With the rise of Reality TV, there Southern Cities and Haunted Hotels of over as a legit thing, were a few shows that come to mind. the US. It’s also the US home of Most and I’m proud to say The first, and in my mind the one that Haunted. The US TV’s mainstream that it was a giant influenced the style of all the ones has gone away from Reality TV, success. It was so that followed, is Scariest Places On though they have held strong on cable good that a couple of Earth. It was a special on ABC Family stations like VH-1 (which is the perfect that featured footage from a British kids were diagnosed place for a US version of I’m Famous TV show where a family from the US with Post-Traumatic and Frightened!) but Paranormal TV had to spend the night in Chillingham Stress Disorder after is pretty much only on The Travel Castle. That was sweet and it having watched it. Channel. established the face-first camera angles That’s good TV. I’m betting that will change in That thing got used by many of the other shows in the sub-genre, especially Most Haunted. the next year or so. The Most Haunted lots of play in the ratings have tended to increase over US media for the It was a good show and it started my the years, which is a feat for any show. Catalina: though my first boyfriend, Lucian, lived The last time we all went was in Or That a few houses over the summer we lived 1993 or so. We sold the place about a Place We on the island for the entire vacation. month after Dad passed, but we went Used to Go He was a sweet boy who lived in Two back, all of us, to stay in Avalon and by Harbors along with his father who was have a wonderful time. I spent a lot of Judith a USC prof at the research station they the trip in Two Harbors, mostly around Morel had on the island. the Banning House and the Civil War I There was a lot to do on the barracks. Dad used to love the Civil spent a lot of island, even if it was in the middle War, so when I went over there and time in and of nowhere. Dad’s favorite thing was found a spot where Dad took a picture around LA. to hike into the deeper portion of the holding both SaBean and me, I broke I grew up island and spot the Island Foxes or down and cried hard. The next day in Chicago, Bison. One year, we went out to see when I went back, they were shooting hung out the bison every day for a week. I even something for TV, so I didn’t get that at The touched one when Dad and I hunkered experience again. Vineyard down and they came up to us after I’ve been back a few times and used almost an hour. Dangerous game true, myself, never for very long, but I really to spend at but it was amazing. do miss the days when we’d go. The least one SaBean liked to chase the boar. house, tiny as it was, felt almost as month a We’d go inland and she’d find one and much like home as the house on the year in LA. run at it, usually brandishing a stick Lake Michigan or Grandpa’s place. Typically, at in a threatening manner. Dad was Maybe after Chris hits it big he’ll buy a least one of those weeks was spent on furious with her when she actually place there and we can all party. Catalina Island. beat one on an afternoon My Dad, Real Estate genius that hike. SaBean said it he was, bought a place on Catalina was because they were in the 1950s. When we were kids, we an invasive species and took a water taxi over, but by the time they needed to be driven Dad started getting sick, we flew on off the island. Dad had helicopter. There are advantages to a permit to hunt them having money. The place was a bit of a in the 1980s and he walk from the landing at Two Harbors. trapped a few and made Most folks on the island live in Avalon, sausage out of them. I and Dad used to spend a lot of time loved that stuff, and if over there and would bring us along, I’m ever at a place that but the place was in Two Harbors. has Boar sausage on There weren’t many folks living there, the menu, I order it. I reminds me of Dad. A Clockwork Soundtrack

It’s, menya droogs, that slightly-less-than-human feeling I’ve been waiting for a long where much emotion has been time to write about one of my drained from what should, by all favourite movies. Released in right, be an emotional piece. 1971, A Clockwork Orange has There’s also a lot of to be one of the strangest films regular classical music on the ever made. Based off a novel by soundtrack. A lot of people claim Anthony Burgess, it’s a classic that it was Clockwork Orange’s film that haunts the viewer. Soundtrack that repopularized Powerful imagery mixes with Beethoven’s Ninth. I don’t know strange references and one of if that’s true, but it’s a good the best voice-overs in modern story. The use of it in the movie film history. A great film but one is so perfect, so elegant in the with an amazing soundtrack. presentation that showing up There was a guy named without that strong connection Walter Carlos who was actually forces me not to enjoy something of a genius. In fact, it that much. I know, I know, I Walter Carlos was a major force should enjoy everything on its in the formation of the music of own merit, but I can’t do that today. He assisted Robert Moog with Ludwig Van. It’s just not in building some of the earliest possible. electronic synthesizers, and Of course, there’s always he did the first classical recordings to done for the soundtrack to Clockwork Singin’ in the Rain. The Gene Kelly ever reach Platinum sales: Switched Orange are remarkable. The first classic was used at a moment of on Bach. Switched on Bach was recorded musical use of the vocoder sheer, unhalting violence, whcih I performed on Synth and sold mad is on the album, which was a big step understand Kelly was not happy with. numbers, proving that people could in the electronica direction. The mood Kubrick knew how to make the most make real music on electronic pieces are disquieting, exactly what we of the song against the dark vision instruments. As time went on, Walter should be feeling at the moment they and I was happy to see that it’s on the Carlos became Wendy Carlos, which are used. The William Tell Overture soundtrack. I can’t say that it’s the really didn’t matter much except is on the synth is wonderful and best piece of music on the record, but people started asking ‘Is Wendy Carlos probably the highlight of the record. at least it stuck out properly, like an related to Walter Carlos?’ The entire feeling of the record is one extremely sore thumb should do. Good As Walter, the compositions that perfectly complements the film: a way to close things too. It Has Come to My Attention... told apart from Germans, the proper Bill Burns, that strong and true name for that archipeligo is the Danish assistant of fanzine fans everywhere, Congo. does a brief pass on my stuff when Now, let us not judge Bill Burns I send it his way, taking care of the too harshly, I mean he did grew up in most egregious of mistakes. (Could Anglandia. you imagine what it would be like if he didn’t?) Bill sent me this note when I Of late I’ve had a lot of thoughts sent him last issue. about trying to find a documentary company to go full-time with. The Chris: No such place as issue is what I’m really good at is Norwegia, although the inhabitants of the research and the presentation as Norway *are* called Norwegians! opposed to the rights & clearances stuff that most folks are looking for. Poor Bill. You’ve been duped I’m much better at the stuff that by that deFacto Corporate Prostitute anyone could do, but few are able to do calling itself the English Language. The right. Research requires three things: fact is we’ve all been mispronouncing, the ability to find info, the ability to misspelling and mistreating the names sorts info and the ability to smell of the Scandihoovian countries for too bullshit when you find it. I’ve got those long and I’m about to open the eyes of skills, but sadly, I fear that I’ll not find all you who wish to hear it. myself in such a role. First off, let’s start in Norwegia. On the other side of Norwegia Norwegia is a lovely country, the is Finlasia. The Finns are a tall, dark Poor Old Cotton middle of the three Northern, or Ass- haired people with eyes that tend Mather: Cold, Scandihoovian nations. It’s towards blue. They are most useful for An Appreciation by inhabitants are tall and easy on the their cell phones and science fiction Mike Swan eyes and seldom do they make bad fandom. Once a part of Russalia, they movies. broke away and have been Finning it If you weighed To the west of Norwegia is up ever since. Probably the best of the significance on a scale, Swedeland, home of the Swedes. They Scandihoovians to party with (just ask and placed proper weight to all things, are a leggy race of blonde hair and Andy Trembley) then Ben Franklin would cause a great blues eyes and they love large stores I’ve heard that people believe tippling to one side. The same could that sell do-it-yourself furniture. You’re that the southern most of the be said of Edison. But for my money, best bet for a really fun night listening Scandihoovian nations is called Cotton Mather’s weight would break to strange folk songs is with a bunch of Daneland. This is just not so. While the balance at a thought. drunken Swedelanders. the people are kind and not easily Cotton Mather, simple and plain, was a secular genius and a spiritual master. The two mix well so seldom that it is imperative that these men be put up for special admiration. He went to Boston Latin, that long-standing school which gave us Louis Farrakhan and wrestler Kevin Sullivan, and then graduated from Harvard before he would have been eligible to drive in modern society. He was held in such high esteem that he The award was won by win nowadays, Enron: The could influence British politics from March of the Penguins. OK, Smartest Guys in the Room the Colonies. I understand that cute wins out Michael Moore’s Michael Like our fabled editor, Cotton awards, but not this one. It’s Moore. It’s a brilliant look at published like a mad man. He is said a good doc, with outstanding Enron and their practices, the to have put out a pamphlet a day for English naration by Morgan ways they played the numbers several years on subjects ranging from Freeman. But it’s basically fluff. and made it all swing the way the need to maintain the Sabbath to No, it’s not a bad doc, in fact they wanted it to. I was hoping defeating witchcraft. He published it’s pretty damned good, but not that it would get more notice works like Wonders of the Invisible Best Feature Doc material. from the critic world, but it did World, which decried witchcraft and Street Fight, a doc about get a wide-release and did pretty well. defended his role in the Salem Witch the race for the 2004 Mayorship of Not Penguins well, but really good for a Hunt (as it came to be called). Newark New Jersey, is much stronger, doc. Every now and again, Mather but also lacks the great depth. It’s The nominee that I thought will pop up in a story (like Calculus must more engaging and I can’t think should win was Murderball. A of Angels) or in a history programme of a doc that I was more drawn to combination of heroism and tragedy, (like the History Channel’s look at Old immediately than Street Fight. Murderball was as tough a doc as North Church), but mostly he remains Almost at the same level, but you’ll find anywhere. The subjects are a figure that is not widely remembered. certainly not quite there, is Darwin’s so interesting and they really make you Shame. Nightmare. Basically it’s an ecological care at the same time as wondering nightmare tale about the introduction how they can be so macho in the face of the Nile Perch to Lake Victoria. It’s of everything they’ve faced. In the end, Christopher J. Garcia writes about strong and a powerful statement about we learn why real life isn’t as pretty 2005 in Documentaries African politics and business. Sadly, as fiction with neither of the teams we I never did do my article on what this would have been exactly the type focus on being the winner. It reminded should win Best Documentary, so I of doc that would win back in 1995 or me of the Yankees losing the series in thought that I’d do a little thing now. so. 2001 when the entire world seemed to For the type of doc that could be rooting for them following 9-11. powerful story and some question its validity. As far as films that weren’t and it’s well- Though it’s an evil piece of liberal nominated go, there were a few that shot. I can’t anti-corporate propaganda, Wal-Mart: were right up there with all the ones really think of The High Cost of Low Price is every listed. Grizzly Man, by the greatest a better doc bit as good as ENRON: The Smartest director ever Werner Herzog, certainly that passes the Guys in the Room. It talks a lot about stands up well against everything, Inspirational the anti-Union stance of WM and the including Penguins. The story follows Story test and fact that the workers get paid so little. I Tim Treadwell, a grizzly lover who the Well-Crafted admit that even though I disagree with is eventually mauled to death along Doc test. It did many of the points they make here, I with his girlfriend. A really strong fairly well last have to say that they really do manage documentary and one that you should year in pretty to convince people that it’s an Evil see. wide release. I’m Corporation and should be stopped. In Mad Hot Ballroom was another, hoping that the fact, I thought twice before going there but I think it was actually first filmmakers do to get my film developed at one-third screened in 2004. It’s the story of kids another one in a similar vein. the price of anywhere else in town. I from the wrong side of the tracks who Let us not forget the Aristocrats. still went, but it was with a heavy soul learn how to dance ballroom. It’s a The filthiest doc ever, a wonderful piece (and slightly fuller wallet). of work and a great commentary on the nature of the Comedian. It was both funny and scary and dirty and great. The DVD with the extras is well-worth the time and effort. Rize is another one that might get passed over. It depicts the dance traditions of Clowning and Krumping and then features a dance battle. It’s visually sumptuous and should be watched, even if you think it’s just a dance movie. Though it’s not easily available (I managed to see a screener), Viva Zapatero! is worth finding as it takes a look at the current state of free speech in Italy. It’s very funny and very smart. Stalking Pete Doherty is a BBC TV doc that is very good about Pete and his heroin use. It’s a rough doc I miss The PeopleMover and he thought that the squares were I’ve written about Yesterland residential zones and the triangles before in my homage to Disneyland were mixed use areas. past. I miss the PeopleMover, more now than ever because of the following article.

The City Of My Hopes & Dreams based off the scribblings of Johnny Garcia, elaborated on by M Lloyd, SaBean MoreL, Judith Morel, Manny Sanford, and Chris Garcia. Written Up and Presented by Christopher J. Garcia Art by While one could debate endlessly the merits of the plan (or lack thereof) arrival and departure areas, and then Dad’s notebooks were full of it did show some simple thoughts that logically, retail, light industrial and strange things. As I was helping him go I’ve always taken into consideration other concerns on the upper portions. through things, one of the books had a when thinking about cities that could Looking at the diagram above, you bunch of writing that I recognised. be planned. The connection through can see this mapped out. The lines “Hey Pops, is this the design for a transit network is the first of them. feeding in would be high-occupancy, that game y’all would play?” I asked. If enough layers of transit are design high-speed vehicles, monorails as an Pops wasn’t sure, but he said and implemented, there’s no need example, that would arrive on the that the guys used to go to Denny's for a massive series of roads. I’m not lowest level, dropping off passengers. and would write things and do little saying that a totally car-less society Those that would be going elsewhere scribbles. As I was looking, I was could work, but one in which maybe would transfer and the others would amazed at exactly what I was seeing. 20% of the population drove to work move up a level. That level would Notes, lots of them, about a city. is potentially doable. I intrepreted the feature a local transport method for I know Pops never studied Urban design as being a series of high speed getting between the different sections planning, but it all made a lot of sense. lines connecting the various residential of the hub. There’s nothing better for As I looked at it, it had a definite pods with transit hubs (so if you lived that use than a PeopleMover system. SimCity thing going on. There were in the pod on the lower-left corner With certain safeguards, these can pods, and in those pods there were you could hop a train and arrive at be safe and cheap. The system would various methods of transport. For the first hub and then transfer to the allow for some road transit, the lines example, there were eight pods: four Centre-bound train before heading surrounding the feeder lines, which of them triangles and four of them out to whichever hub you needed to would be the logical way to ship goods squares. I asked Dad about them get to. If the triangles are mixed-use, without too much dependence on they’d have on one level all the transit passenger lines. The idea has a lot of M’s addition merit, though it does require an entire When I sent some discussion city infrastructure that goes quite a bit of the city plans to M, she wasn’t vertical (or subterranean as it were) too thrilled. It seemed a bit too and would be massively expensive to Science Fiction-y for her. I can build. Then again, it would be easy understand that. The biggest on the pocketbook once built due to problem she pointed out was the the simple nature of the design as lack of free form space. There’s transport costs would be lowered a school of thought that believes (per capita) and the localization of that some amount of rugged retail and industry with transit would space, that is not manicured park- eliminate so many problems facing land but natural state space, is modern cities. important. I can see that too. If the areas between the pods were allowed to exist as natural around town, they’d allow for great space, that help the design’s exposure of the businesses to people, success, but there would allowing for great success. also be far too little control, M also mentioned that the only it would seem, and the areas thing really missing was a strong abutting the pods would single area that everyone could identify naturally be pressured into with. In olden days, these were the serving as expansion space. Cathedrals, and in modern times, The thing she depending on the city, they’ve been liked about it wasn’t the things like stadiums and museums. In greenness, but the fact that Seattle, it’s Pike’s Place Market while in it recognised that all parts Boston it’s the Common. Stadiums or of a retail sector have to be Universities could easily fill that role. served by easy transport. SaBean came in a bit late but She mentioned that it’s not made two points that really got me easy navigating buses in thinking. They were both on energy Finland (and she can’t drive usage. right now) and even though To be able to build a city (or a they go almost everywhere, series of cities, as these pods could it’s so much effort. Access is be seen), you’d require a vast area, the key to strong retail and preferably of flat terrain. The easiest if the PeopleMovers are more source for that sort of land would be than just a few stations the desert, which would require a lot of air-conditioning...unless you moved only option. There are several deserts provide meat. The issue: they require everything underground. That would around the world where this amount space and at least some percentage then require a system to bring fresh air of land would be available. Putting the of real feed. But, they’d provide meat. into the underground system, which is transit system underground would When we talked about designing a not a trivial concern. The underground be one way, but using the naturally space ship, we made all these points option is OK, so long as people get cooler subterrenean environment for about space and food, but SaBean adequate vitamin D and the like. The the living quarters would be intelligent made a good point by saying that problem would be powering such large too. In any way you look at it, there people on a space ship are more cities. Unless the areas are truly huge has to be massive amounts of power willing to forego some comforts like (each pod being 10 miles on a side and generated by either traditional power meat because they understand the the distances between them being 5 or plants (not bloody likely) or by wind conditions. A city would have to so miles) there’d be no way to generate and solar. I’d say that solar would be provide that sort of thing because all the power and grow all the food in the most likely (if a panel that could people understand the conditions allow the area alloted. convert with thirty percent efficiency for it. Interesting topic. SaBean failed to mention the and have a lifetime of somewhere That’s a small problem when you required energy and other resources around fifty years could be developed consider the water issue. If one would to build such a huge series of along with a cleaner production build in the desert, water would have communities. That would probably method) and that would require much to be brought in. Now, in CA, we have be enough to keep a million people space. the Aqueduct. If these cities would be employed for a lifetime. Manny spoke up on the matter diverting people from existing cities The possibility of a below ground of food. Manny’s first comment was (let’s say each pod could handle 2 system, at least for some portion ‘What about the farmers?’. They’d million people in fair density), they’d of the system, would solve many need land, not to mention fertilizers be able to redirect the aqueduct (and problems (and the aforementioned and other things that make plants improve it to fight loss via evaporation) health matters that would come grow, like water. The desert is not to the new location. Water reclamation about because of lack of exposure to the environment for such things. and recycling would also be hugely natural light would cause over ones) Pigs are highly useful as disposal important. Getting people to drink but the desert would really be the and reclamation creatures and could recycled waste water would be a challenge (the psychology is the rough together enough money, make a pitch part) but once people get over it, it’s to get the land for free (or close to it) much easier. then we might see a private version. Judith didn’t have a lot to say It would also likely lead to issues other than ‘Who’s gonna pay for all with corners being cut once the true of this?’ She makes a valid point. As expense of such a thing would be things stand, money for developing discovered. housing units, with the exceptions of Judith also mentioned low-cost (project) housing is usually something about existing cities. With the domain of private industry. the massive single tax base that these This is more a project for the public megalopolises would provide, how could sector. Planning a community of this the other cities compete? That’s a good size with so much thought towards point and it makes me think of the sustainability (or at least less non- current issues we’re having with rural sustainability) is seldom going to ring small town vs. city issues. There will true with private industry. On the always be people who prefer the olde other hand, if a developer could get ways and making sure they are taken care of will be difficult. There’s an easy test case going on right now in the city of New Orleans. There are those that want their homes in the old quarters, districts and parishes rebuilt, but there are plans that will severely limit the number that will be rebuilt. This layer for transit between them. conflict will undoubtedly happen. My thoughts on the speed of M brought up another good the transit methods were bulstered point. If this system were adopted, by SaBean. 100 MPH Monorails are how big could it go? could the entire not unthinkable, and 250 MPH Bullet country be put onto a system of trains are easily doable (though both interlinked pods like this, allowing for are expensive). If the PeopleMover greater growth and higher populations. system went ten miles per hour with Well, with the amount of rail/highway cars every two dozen feet, with pull- interconnectivity, we’re almost there, out stations every quarter mile or but this plan would allow for greater so, that could very easily work as unity in presentation. If more than one a method could allow for reliable, of these pod schemes would work, then and timely travel around the pods I’m sure you’d see them add another (especially if you had Clockwise and counter-clockwise travel paths). The that long running site (dating to the fmz, Drink Tank, but it all can be travel system would be essential to the late 1970s, if I remember correctly) summed up in one brief phrase: design ever having a chance to work. of con news and SMoF gathering, is You are one sick puppy! And Now, My Pops wasn’t the type about to shutter itself. I’ve only heard thank you for letting M take care of guy who would do anything that this a couple of places, and dimly of this issue while you were out he thought might have a chance of remember reading an email about it Cinequesting. ever working, but he hit a few good that I can not find now, and am hoping I’m not that sick. I did cut out one points. When I showed him a few of that it is not the case. Oddly, my two article that M had got (it was a the comments that M and co. made emails to discover if it is in fact true Male article that was very good but he said ‘Well, that’s further than we have gone unanswered. Anyone with a little too porno for me. Think of ever got’ and went on to other topics. info please let me know. the Same-Sex Tendencies article in Strangely, this is perilously close to The thing is, the SF-Lovers Con issue 69, but with two and a half World Building and I swore that I’d Listings were the most complete on pages of graphic ‘this goes here, never get involved in that, but still, it’s the web and would leave a large gap if that goes there’ stuff. It wasn’t an interesting topic that I’m probably they were to go away. That’s one thing the subject matter, but it was the going to be thinking about more. I’ve brought up as a way of making the graphic writing. The guy who wrote N3F more important to all fans, that it, M’s long-time friend Shane, wrote A Few Other Thoughts we might find a way to continue their me saying that he understood and work. If they’re not going anywhere, would try and get me a cleaned up So, I’m President of The N3F, and I hope they’re not, then still version for a later issue. and as such, I’m always thinking. another source of information on cons So, when are you going to do this Here’s a spot of truth: I usually think would be helpful. again? It was fun to read and look at; of how the N3F (and by extension, I) I may have to check out this deviant- can better serve all of fandom than just art.com site some day and peruse the what could be done to help the N3F Letter Graded Mail art galleries. itself. I really believe that by helping I’ll probably give in to M and let her the N3F, a group that many accuse of sent to [email protected] edit another one next year, after having no real reason for existing other the Baby has come around (they’re than the fact that there are still people by my Gentle Readers thinking Aarno for the name, whcih who want to be members, focus on I approve of). I’ve promised SaBean serving All Known Fandom that it can First off, an LoC I should have run and Judith an issue: one-half on become a very relevant and important last issue from John “I wrote an Music, the Other on Money. I’m group again. entire Fanzine Review Column on interested to see how that one pans I mention this because I’ve heard Chris Garcia for Some Reason” out. a few rumours lately and if they are Purcell The main comment I have to true, I’m hoping that the N3F can I really don’t have much to say make is that studies have ascertained help out. The first is that SF-Lovers, about the 69th edition of your splendid that the ultimate male sexual fantasy is girl-on-girl action, followed distantly and here’s some comments on issues been my thrill, sorry. by bondage/dominance. The brief 69 and 70 of The Drink Tank. stories in your zine followed this trend, Never understood the S&M Star 69…Hello, M. Great issue, with a topic and are an interesting cross-section Trek connection that folks like near and dear to most of our hearts. of your Drink Tank coterie. When you Margret Cho talk about, but I know Great erotic art all the way through, get this loc, tell M that I am well aware it’s there. too, especially pages 2 and 3…and of how horny a pregnant woman can further on, too… Thanks for some I can see why M put the essay get. When my wife was expecting our marvelous eye candy. on Same-Sex Tendencies…for a lot of kids, it was always during the third tri- guys, it’s a thrill to be a voyeur in a mester when she would get supremely The Eye-candy was mostly my girl-girl relationship, no matter how far horny. FYI: tell M to try it doggie-style doing, though she forwarded a that relationship goes. I’d like to think while lying on her side. Much easier bunch my way. She said that I that the guys might be looking for that way. chose things that were totally some directions on how to please the I’ve often accused M of being innappropriate, but that also girl in their lives, or how to move once bisexual specifically because it helped her libido. I didn’t ask how. that girl finally arrives. Folks, you find drives the boys wild. She’s denied your love wherever it is, and no one it, but you could tell she didn’t I am pleased to say that many can tell you where you should look. mean it. I’ve based this along and feel that age makes no difference There’s little enough love in this world, she is most grateful. when it comes to love. Doesn’t matter find the one you want to share it with. Anyhow, I’ll see you next issue. who’s younger or who’s older. Yvonne Gender should have nothing to do with Hope the film fest went well. is more than six years’ my senior, it. All the best, but who cares? Perhaps Magda was John Purcell just someone who needed Manny as I totally agree. I think a fair something to hold onto along that amount of the stuff she got was How About a little something from bumpy ride of getting to the top. wonderful, and from people I’d have the Originator of the “Lloyd Penney- never thought of asking. Style LoC”: Lloyd Penney! Yeah, she was a nice girl at times. Dear Chris & M!: I’ve talked to her in the last year This issue may be heavy on the or so. I’m always the elder in sex, but at least they can’t really bash I think we’ve all survived another wild relationships and usually that’s a men for being sex-crazed. Sex drives St. Patrick’s Day, the green beer is all plus for me, though I do love older us all, some more than others, and we consumed, and the warm bodies are women... should just lie back and enjoy it, to being swept up along most bar-laden coin a phrase… streets. I had to go to work St. Patrick’s Hey, vanilla’s a flavour, too! I Eve, so I saw several bars bursting keep hearing about S&M adventures Yeah, that’s my favourite position at the seams, renting out most good at some conventions, especially those too...wait...I shouldn’t have said brews. It’s done, and it’s the weekend, that brought down the convention in that. so I can get with the programme again, Washington some years ago. Never Not sure what else to say here eventually (see my response to John) outrageous Scottish accent. Shooting/ without getting myself into trouble. All taping should start real soon, and once I can say is that if we ever do figure My loc…Atomic Betty, at home the film is done, it will probably be out why we like breasts, buns or other with her nebbish parents in the submitted for a couple of film contests. parts of the female anatomy, they’ll thriving metropolis of Moose Jaw probably lose some of the appeal and Heights. It’s a fun cartoon, and if I Have them send one my way and I’ll magic. So, let’s not try to figure it out, was to buy a DVD of a complete set of take it around the circuit. I do love and we’ll all have more fun. Have a cartoons, I think it would at the first that name. good pregnancy, M, and get all you season of Atomic Betty. Second season Zeppelins… check out http:// want and need. is on the go right now, and the story lines are interesting. Ladies? Is Chris www.aerosml.com/aeroscraft.asp. I I’m sure for M that won’t be a Garcia an animated cartoon? Let’s take had found something about a German problem. a survey… company called CargoLifter, which would have used a fixed cargo platform 70…I’ve always like announcing work; I refuse to answer that on the and a spherical balloon, but they went it gives you a chance to exercise the grounds that someone might come out of business nearly four years ago pipes and do a little acting with your up to me and hit me with a mallet. now. voice. Did that at, of all places, a figure That’s always a danger if you’re a skating club one summer when I was cartoon. That’s an awesome site. I must at high school. somehow work towards a Zeppelin That voice audition…because trip of my own. Best Zeppelin gag I used to imitate the wrestler of my previous work with Sectarian of late is on the Simpsons. “1936: announcers. “This contest is Wave (the CDs will be available this Jesse Owens humiliates Adolf Hitler scheduled for one fall.” and the summer, finally), I got a call to ask by Out-running his Zeppelin. like. I’ve got a great story about if I’d be interested in more voice my time on a swing making work. Sure! The project is called C’est tout for now. Yvonne’s off announcements that I’ll write up Bastards of Kirk, a fan film created for another flying lesson, so I have someday. by a comic-book studio in Toronto, the place to myself. Take it easy, Bright Anvil Studios, but produced and see you next issue. (Checked Hey, Chris…if one of M’s by a professional film studio and eFanzines.com, nothing new there, so articles in issue 69 was a little too director. Go to www.redfortfilms.com, I’m caught up for the next three hours, pornographic for publication, how click Enter, click Projects, and click I’ll bet. Cheers!) about sending it directly to us via e- on Bastards of Kirk for all the details. Hey, even I have to take breaks mail? I can’t be the first one to ask out The part I went for was a certain chief to eat and sleep. Well, maybe not of curiosity’s sake. And if I am, well, engineer, and I got it. I will be seen in sleep. I’m just a Dirty Old Man, and I hadda profile only, probably wearing a red ask. shirt (hope there’s no target on the Yours, Lloyd Penney. I’ll get it fixed up and put out there back), and I’ll be exercising my most