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Bromandments Thou Shalt

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Bromandments Thou Shalt SATURDAY/SUNDAY August 3-4, 2019 No. 137 THE BIGGEST MISTAKE BAKERS MAKE IS MIXING ALL INGREDIENTS AT ONCE PG11 VISIT AT TOURISTIC CAVES IN THE HEART OF NAIVASHA WHERE MAU MAU HID PG12 Bromandments thou shalt not break TK ;,%8Ă7-2-8 SAT-SUN August 3-4, 2019 Wik ndi Public secrets hen we befriend someone, they enter a rarefied Wrealm in our lives, where they share our best and worst secrets. The biggest mark of friendship is how well they keep secrets, even after you have broken up. We all know about girlfriends who are more than happy to tell all and sundry of their friends’ secrets after a tiff. How you handle secrets is not a mark of how weak the per- son who shared the personal business is, it says more about the character of the person blar- ing out the information to the world. This week has seen Sonko posting his late friend Ken’s se- crets on social media, and even, more inappropriately, during the memorial service. I applaud the spirit of the gesture, to speak up for those who cannot, such as an innocent child, but the execu- tion is all flawed. There are better ways, that show respect to both the widow and Ken’s family, that he could have used to share the same. But as we cast stones at Sonko, let’s look inward and realise that some of us are guilty of public betrayals too. I guess you have to choose those whom you share your secrets with more care- fully, or just wrestle and guard *EWLMSR them all alone. For me, I’ll go for Ways you a therapist. At least (s)he is legally can impress bound to keep them and never fellow TK broadcast them at a rally for sen- congregants sationalism or to further political and the first ,ERKSYX agendas. Happy weekend! estate too. Fashion shows, flea markets, TK concerts and more ways to enjoy your +M^QS weekend. It’s an iWorld affair GLEX for tech fan Lucy Mambise. TK Matilda [email protected] Wik ndi Published by Mediamax Network Limited CEO: Ken Ngaruiya Editor-in-Chief, Print: Eric Obino AG Managing Editor: Ken Bosire Quality-Training Editor: Chris Odwesso Features Editor: Pocyline Karani Editor: Matilda Nzioki Business Editor: William Gitonga Sports Editor: James Waindi Revise Editors: Mukalo Kwayera, Stephen Mburu, Patrick Wachira Photographic Editor: Hudson Wainaina Designer: Patrick Okuna Sports Designer: Alice Nyanjao Contributors: Milliam Murigi, Grace Wachira, Njeri Maina, Harriet James, Marcella Akinyi, Manuel Ntoyai, Perpetua Adoyo, Julio Kiths, Vanessa Waithira, Adalla Allan Photography: John Ochieng Wik ndi SAT-SUN August 3-4, 2019 86)2(-2/) BY CHEBET KORIR arly this week, the Kenyan government allegedly deported a Caucasian man who had apparently been masquerading as Jesus in the country. There were also two pastors who had hosted him, convincing Ebelievers that the white man was Jesus ‘Jesus’ Christ, and he had finally come back as he had promised in the Bible. The evangelist, who is known as Michael Jobs, responded to the claims saying the news was fake. Through his social media page he wrote, “Hey guys! Just to let you know there has been responds to many false “fake news” reports here in Kenya about me. I just did nine days of crusades in Ongata Rongai, Kitengela, and Kiserian, where many people were saved and healed.” He went ahead to explain that he dressed up as Jesus during the crusades because they deportation were performing plays focusing on the life of Christ. To prove that his deportation claims were fake, he pointed out that he is still in Kenya preaching in schools. claims Trending tweet Trending video #RestinpeaceKenOkoth Trending picture Kenyans have been sharing tributes Jamie to the late Kibra Member of Parliament, Willy at it again Ken Okoth, who passed on after battling Foxx joins Willy Paul is not new in colorectal cancer. Politicians, friends ‘Wamlambez’ the controversy world. and family members swamped social So, the Wamlambez In fact, a week cannot media with their tributes and messages of Wamnyonyez song by go without him hitting condolences. Sailors is still making headlines over some of Raila Odinga: I’m deeply saddened by the waves, and now, his unending theatrics. passing of our MP. Hon. Ken battled cancer American actor Jamie This week, he shared with unique bravery while serving his voters Foxx has joined the a picture of his new to the last minutes of his life. May God grant bandwagon. A short release dubbed Lamba peace and strength to his family and may he video clip shared by Nyonyo, and certainly, Rest In Peace. a local designer and his fans we not pleased. Kisumu Governor Anyang Nyong’o: Hon. owner of a fashion The song, whose title Ken Okoth’s battle with cancer has been house, Mama Foli, translates to a vulgar a real encouragement to people living showed Jamie Foxx’s act, had almost 50,000 with cancer. Comrade Ken will be greatly saying, “When I say views in less than 24 missed by his Kibra Constituents, the ODM ‘Wamlambez’, you hours. He has, however, party family and the country at large. My reply ‘Wamnyonyez’”. not come out to explain condolences. He surprisingly much about the song, Hon. Eng. Ahmed Bashane: On behalf of pronounces the words rather concentrating the People of Tarbaj Constituency in Wajir, well, that left many on media tours as he I send my condolences to the family and Kenyans impressed. promotes the song. friends of Kibra MP Hon @okothkenneth. 4 %2.0))Ă7)4-'03:)6)0%8-327,-47 SAT-SUN August 3-4, 2019 Wik ndi DEBATE IS RIFE WHETHER WHAT GOVERNOR MIKE SONKO DID, REVEALING DETAILS ABOUT THE LATE MP KEN OKOTH’S ALLEGED Mocking a guy’s car is BABY MAMA DURING worse than standing too camaraderie etiquettePl ay HIS MEMORIAL SERVICE, close at the guiding male friendship urinal. IN FRONT OF HIS WIFE, in today’s world has been FAMILY AND THE REST styled the Bro Code. Al- OF THE NATION, WAS A though the concept is Aolder, the term was pop- SIGN OF A GOOD FRIEND ularised in the 2000s by Barney Stinson, a character from the tele- OR NOT. WE LOOKED vision show How I Met Your Mother. Some AT SOME BRO CODE call it ‘bromance’ or ‘brohood’, but in gen- EX-WIVES AND BABY MAMAS ARE eral, the Bro Code is about men having FOREVER OFF LIMITS RULES, AND THE OTHER other Y-chromosomed brethren’s backs. th Who says guys can’t master history? SIDE OF THE COIN TOO It is this brohood that explains how bros They know enough about history to stay – WOMEN, FRIENDS AND get away with trading insults as a form of away from it. History can get sticky and greeting, get along despite all the danger- emotional, and guys know better than to RELATIONSHIPS ous and embarrassing pranks they pull on get involved in all that stuff. They’ll for- each other, and how they still share a beer ever stay away from a friend’s ex-wife or and laugh immediately after a fistfight. baby mama. If it’s dating, they’ll only date a Bros do a lot of things for and with their friend’s ex-girlfriend if she makes the first bros: good, bad, funny, or stupid, but there move and their bro says it’s cool. Other- is a set of rules that dictates where to draw wise...nah, just not worth the drama. the line, in day-to-day interactions and, es- pecially, in matters relationships. THE BRO CODE DOES NOT EXIST The Bro Code does not exist; if any girl FOUR IMPORTANT RULES asks, they will deny, deny, deny. Have you There are four things a guy must at all seen Men In Black? Right. There are some times respect about his bro – his house, his things ladies are not meant to see or know parents, his partner and last but not least, his car. These are off limits for mockery or disrespect between guys. Breaking this is equal to mocking or disrespecting them. After all, a man’s home is his castle. Let’s The meme not even go to the parents. That is a gross world violation of the Bro Code, and a legitimate weighed in on excuse for retribution. As for his ride, cars the matter. are not to be made fun of. Mocking a guy’s car is worse than standing too close at the urinal, which is another rule in the Code. Guys may fight about sports and food, not over girls. 5 Wik ndi SAT-SUN August 3-4, 2019 6)0%8-327,-47 By Koi Kimani The flipside Ladies love a good chat. We are emotional beings, that is just who we are. We love talking and being heard. When you’re with your closest girl- friends, you tend to have all kinds of discussions, and we comfort and give each other advice where need be (even when none is needed). Of the many topics we discuss, our men are definitely going to have a slot on there. To start off the conversation, one common remark is ‘…you have been too MIA from the group’ even when you know well that you have only missed one lunch date but for some reason, it’s always a bigger deal if you took a raincheck on them because of your man. We sometimes get too chatty for our own good and this can sometimes end up harming the relationship than anything.
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