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Modern Shabbat Guide

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Modern Shabbat Guide THE NOURISH CO. Modern Shabbat Toolkit HOW TO USE ANCIENT WISDOM TO REFLECT AND RECONNECT nourish-co.com INTRODUCTION When I first learned about Shabbat in Intro to Judaism class at our temple, I was intrigued and excited. Having not grown up with religion, I loved the idea of having one special day a week to reflect on the past week and reconnect with loved ones. For a long time, I put a lot of pressure on myself to create a beautiful meal on Shabbat. “It’s the most important holiday of the entire Jewish year,” I would say, which is true. At the time, I was remodeling an apartment, planning a wedding and working at a demanding interior design job. After a long week, my husband Bryan would walk in the door to me frantically running around the apartment, or sobbing because I was in such a hurry I had forgotten to turn on the oven and it was 8pm. I couldn’t be present with my husband, and I began to get the suspicion that I wasn’t “getting” what Shabbat is all about. Then, I unintentionally took a break from Shabbat. If I couldn’t prepare a perfect meal then why do it, the perfectionist in me thought. But after a few months, I began to feel like something was missing from my life. So I went to temple on Shabbat for services. Right when I walked in the door, I felt my shoulders drop. I felt like I was exhaling for the first time in months and I felt enveloped in love by my community. It felt so nourishing and healing, and I thought, “there has to be another way.” THE NOURISH CO. nourish-co.com The Modern Shabbat Toolkit INTRODUCTION That’s when I realized that maybe the ancient traditions and practices of Judaism can be more of a toolkit for my modern life. I don’t have to use all 613 tools (or mitzvot/commandments), and maybe some of the tools needed some gentle refinishing to bring them into our 21st century Jewpanese household. Maybe some were not relevant in this chapter of our lives, and others more relevant than ever. Today, Shabbat in the Posner household is different every week. We try to light candles every Friday together to remember and honor our shared Jewish culture. But I would be lying if I said we’ve never missed a Friday. I’m often in awe that many parts of our Jewish traditions, though thousands of years old, are still so relevant to life today. I’m also convinced that this is because our ancestors were cultural innovators. History tells us that our traditions have changed, adapted with the times and places where the diaspora settled. I believe that as 21st century, interfaith, mixed ethnicity and mixed race Jews, we have the same responsibility. Surely, the ancient Hebrews in Egypt were’t eating matzo ball soup or going to Shabbat services lead by LGBTQ or women rabbis. As Michael Twitty says in The Cooking Gene, “it’s no sin to go into your past and fetch what you need to go forward into the future in a positive way. The seed for the next generation is rescued in the past.” THE NOURISH CO. nourish-co.com The Modern Shabbat Toolkit SHABBAT STORY *from InterfaithFamily Shabbat is the Jewish Sabbath. The English word Sabbath came from the Hebrew word, Shabbat. It’s pronounced “shah-baht.” Shabbat lasts from sundown on Friday until three stars are visible on Saturday night. The greetings for Shabbat are “Shabbat shalom” (Sabbath peace) or the Yiddish “gut Shabbos” (“good Sabbath”). Shabbat features in the Ten Commandments, and the commandment to keep Shabbat is repeated in the Torah, the first five books of the Hebrew scripture that provides the foundation for Judaism. Shabbat is a day of rest and enjoyment for us at the end of the work week, just as God did at the end of the week of creation. Traditional Jews avoid doing any work, reserving the time for friends and family, pleasant walks and naps, prayer and study. Shabbat is a day of peace, rest, reflection, and hospitality for the entire community. The Torah invites all to share in the blessing of rest and explicitly includes those who are not Jewish to take a day of rest as well. Jews were the first community to establish this healthy custom of a day off from work. The gift of Shabbat is part of God’s covenant with the Jewish people. Honoring the Sabbath is one way Jews have of maintaining that agreement. *The following pages reflect our family’s Shabbat traditions, which may differ with from other Jewish families depending on where they are from, where their ancestors are from and what Jewish movement they are part of. NOURISH CO. nourish-co.com The Modern Shabbat Toolkit WHY “DO” SHABBAT? Here are some of my favorite things I’ve learned about Shabbat: 1. It’s the most important holiday of the entire Jewish year, and it comes once a week. 2. I love the idea that we can accomplish more by working less, and infuse the coming week with the spirituality gained during Shabbat. 3. In our prayer book at temple, there is a beautiful blessing that starts, “Days pass and years vanish and we walk sightless among miracles…” I like to think that pausing on Shabbat helps me to become more present and aware of the miracles of life, so I’m not spending weeks on end walking sightlessly. 4. The Internet has made us more connected than ever globally, and simultaneously more disconnected than ever, which is not a good feeling. Shabbat reminds me to stay connected and present with my loved ones. 6. It reminds us to remember: Loved ones who have passed, those who need healing, and our blessings in life. 7. I like to think of Shabbat as necessary as sleep, which we need to do regularly to restore our physical systems as well as our mental and emotional states. NOURISH CO. nourish-co.com The Modern Shabbat Toolkit SHABBAT BASICS Here is a basic rundown of the order of Shabbat events. You can do all of these things, pick and choose what’s most relevant for that particular evening or feel free to adjust and adapt each to your unique family and household! FRIDAY EVENING: Lighting Candles Blessings Kiddush (Blessing over the fruit of the vine/wine) Motzi (Blessing over wheat, customarily challah) Dinner *** SATURDAY: Shabbat Brunch Shabbat Walk Read and/or Create Take a nap Havdalah (a beautiful ceremony that symbolically marks the end of Shabbat) NOURISH CO. nourish-co.com The Modern Shabbat Toolkit LIGHTING CANDLES PRAYER: Baruch atah, Adonai, Eloheinu, melech haolam, asher kid'shanu b'mitzvotav, v'tzivanu l'hadlik ner shel Shabbat. בָרוך אַתָּה אַדנָי אֱלהֵינו מֶלֶך הָעולָם אַשֶׁר קדשָנו בְמִצְותָיו וְצִוָנו לְהַדלִיק נֵר שֶל שַבָת Blessed are You, God, Ruler of the universe, who sanctified us with the commandment of lighting Shabbat candles. Before the blessing is recited, I like to use my hands to wave in the heat and light of the candles towards me three times. The first time symbolizes the last week, the second the present moment, and the last the coming week. I then cover my eyes with my hands and recite the blessing. There are a few reasons why people do this. I do it because closing my eyes helps me feel centered and grounded in the sacred moment. It also feels like I am bringing in the magic of Shabbat towards me. This is just my personal preference. You can do whatever you’d like! NOURISH CO. nourish-co.com The Modern Shabbat Toolkit BLESSING YOUR LOVED ONES Jewish parents sometimes bless their children, and there is a Hebrew blessing for this, which you can find on the internet if you’re interested. This ritual has evolved to include couples, where one person blesses the other and even friends bless each other. I think it’s such a sweet ritual, and prefer to improvise a bit here. Here are a list of ideas to help you get started: - If blessing a partner or friend, you can place one hand on their shoulder and start out with “my wish for you this Shabbat is…” It can be anything! That the date they are excited about goes well, that the company they are interviewing with sees what you see in them, etc. - Go around the table and have your guests share something they are thankful. - Have your guests acknowledge a moment they appreciated or something special they noticed during the week about another member at the table. NOURISH CO. nourish-co.com The Modern Shabbat Toolkit KIDDUSH PRAYER: בָרוְ אַתָה אַדנָי אֱלהֵינו מֶלְֶ הָעולָם בורא פְרי הַגָפֶן ‘לחיים‘! Baruch atah Adonai, Eloheinu melech ha-olam, borei p’ri hagafen. L’chaim! Blessed are You, God, Ruler of the Universe, Who creates fruit of the vine. To life! Kiddush means holiness and is the prayer over the fruit of the vine (aka grape juice or wine) that sanctifies Shabbat. We don’t drink much wine in my house, so we usually only do kiddush if we have guests over. There is a long version of the kiddush prayer and a short version. We usually say the short version, so that’s what I’ve included above. Traditionally, the man of the household says kiddush. Bryan and I say it together. Some families have a special kiddush cup that they pass around after the blessing for everyone to take a sip.
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