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Boxing Style K: Shavua Tov Ladies and Gentlemen And

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Boxing Style K: Shavua Tov Ladies and Gentlemen And MACHLOKET: BOXING STYLE K: SHAVUA TOV LADIES AND GENTLEMEN AND WELCOME TO THE RABBINICAL FACE OFF BETWEEN DEFENDING CHAMPION, CHIEF RABBI JACOB BERAB AND CHALLENGER RABBI LEVI IBN HABIB. WE ARE LIVE FROM THE JERUSALEM ARENA, MOTZEI SHABBOS AND THE ARENA IS PACKED. THE AUDIENCE IS FILLED WITH PEOPLE FROM ALL OVER. YOU CAN SEE THE DEDICATION OF FANS WHO HAVE TRAVELED FROM THE HOLY CITY OF SAFED FOR TONIGHTS MATCH. I am Jacob Katz, and sitting next to me is my partner, Graetz and we are reporting live on behalf of Sanhedrin Productions. G:TONIGHT’S EVENT HAS BEEN SPONSORED BY THE JEWS FOR MASHIACH LOCATED IN SAFED SO ENJOY THE MELAVEH MALKAH FOLLOWING THE FIGHT. DONATION CARDS WILL BE PASSED AROUND IN BETWEEN MATCHES, AND ALL PROCEEDS WILL BE GOING TO THE STRUGGLING JEWISH COMMUNITY OF JERUSALEM. T-MINUS 30 MINUTES TILL THE MATCH BEGINS. K:These two mighty Rabbis have been waiting to meet in the ring and finally settle this dispute and give a knockout punch. This bout will be three rounds with a two minute time limit. The boxers will fight until there is a knockout or the timer rings.[SIREN RINGS] Do you hear that Graetz, the warm up bell is ringing, it looks like it is time for the Rabbi’s to come out. G: This is the moment you've all been waiting for, It's time! ​ K:..and now introducing the champion. Fighting out of the red corner. This man is a master of Kabbalah and Talmud study. Holding a professional record of being a chief Rabbi at the young age of 18, and the first Rabbi with Smicha, he is unstoppable!! Standing 5 feet, 11 inches tall weighing in at 194 pounds. Fighting out of the Kabbalistic center of the world, Safed. Ladies and gentlemen presenting the reigning champion, defending the re-institution of Smicha and the Talmud champion of the world. RABBI JACOB BERAB! G: and now introducing the challenger. Fighting out of the blue corner. This man is ​ Talmud scholar strict on literal meanings, with little patience for derivations. His usual passive and tranquil personality rarely reveal energy unless he feels something is really wrong, making this match all the the more exciting to see him rise from the shadows . Standing 6 feet, 3 inches tall weighing in at 215 pounds. Fighting out of the holiest city in the world, Jerusalem. Today, he will attempt to knock out Berab for good and stop the re-ordination of Smicha and the Sanhedrin. Ladies and gentlemen the contemplative challenger, RABBI LEVI IBN HABIB!!!! K: The referee today is world-respected MAIMONIDES, who has vested interest in the outcome of this fight since his commentaries may have originated the fight. When Ibn Habib heard that Maimonides. would be the referee, he protested, saying that Maimonides would be prejudiced. Ibn Habib only agreed to this set-up when he learned that Nachmanides would be there too and this bout would be a fight stop the spread of Smicha. [RABBI’S WARMING UP] G: So Katz, I don’t know about you but I have been vigorously following the press leading up to this fight. K: Me? Not only have I been obsessed, but I have even gone to both sides’ press conferences and have gathered some information. This match seems to have a lot weighing on it. G: Oh Yes! I heard that Berab has been touring all over visiting his fans and admirers and having press conferences in Egypt, Damascus, Safed, and even Jerusalem!! K: Well see, when Ibn Habib challenged Berab, everyone was in shock. Everyone was aware that Ibn Habib disagreed with Berab’s actions but no one really understood the depths of it. See, Ibn Habib is a quiet man, he is very well versed in Talmud study but never really inserts his own opinions. At first when he didn’t accept that Berab ordained him as the chief Rabbi of Jerusalem, we assumed it was a dignity thing, that he was upset that the scholars of Jerusalem weren’t included in the decision, or that Safed was trying to usurp Jerusalem’s holiness. G: But it was more than that, wasn’t it? K: Apparently so, because Berab’s ordination was a sincere action, despite the fact Berab and Ibn Habib have had many disagreements in the past. But Ibn Habib not only refused the offer, he also went out and publicly declared the ordination a risk to Rabbinical Judaism. G: What an accusation!! K: I know!! And I heard the letters that were sent between them became very personal. It seems like each guy thinks the ordination is about more than just--- [INTERRUPTED BY GRAETZ] G: KATZ! KATZ! DO YOU SEE WHAT I SEE!! K: WOWEE IT LOOKS LIKE WE HAVE SOME SMACK TALK GOING ON PRE GAME! G: Shh let’s try to listen to what they are saying before the Referee breaks it up. [Berab and Ibn Habib standing face to face outside of the rink] IBN HABIB: I know Berab you think you're better than me, I just never thought it would take a match to show you your real social status. BERAB: Ya, well we’ve been fighting for over 14 years, I can’t believe you would challenge me on this of all things. IBN HABIB: Ya well in 14 years you’ve done some crazy things but you’ve never been this stupid. BERAB: Stupid? You accuse me of disrespecting Jerusalem once and you go all nuts on me, well news flash, the Jews of Safed have been through the same persecutions so don’t envy our success, and maybe try to learn a thing or two from us. God knows you need it. IBN HABIB: Oh boo hoo don’t you dare play that pity card, Jerusalem Jews have been struggling to make ends meet for years, and I never left them, you ran from Jerusalem when things got tough and got all comfortable in prosperous Safed. And then you make yourself the chief Rabbi, what an accomplishment! BERAB: Are you implying that I wouldn’t be a great leader in Safed if they were struggling?! IBN HABIB: Understand it how you want, but anyone can lead in easy times. The mark of a great man is one who could lead in hardship! BERAB: Oh everyone, round of applause! The great “Man of Jerusalem” is back! Let’s see how well the “Man of Jerusalem” can hold up in a fight. IBN HABIB: I’ve been through worse, your Kabbalistic fighting strategies don’t scare me! BERAB: You say that now, but when I’m done with you, you’re gonna wish you actually converted to Christianity when you had a chance! [AUDIENCE GASPS] G: I’m not sure why the referee isn’t stopping this, but boy am I thankful! K: Shut up Graetz i’m trying to hear how Ibn Habib is gonna recover from that one. IBN HABIB: Everyone! Please look! Is this the man you really want to be the leader of the Beit Din? BERAB: Is that all you can say? Are you scared? The Gates of Jerusalem can’t protect you now. IBN HABIB: No that is not all I have to say, in fact, when I’m done with you, you are gonna be so cut up, I hope you have a good mystical remedy to heal you. BERAB: Ya in fact I do! Don’t you dare doubt the power of Kabbalah, actually maybe you should try some, since nothing else seems to be working for Jerusalem. IBN HABIB: As if that’s gonna work, you try keeping a community together under such intense government pressure, the Turkish government wants your money, not you and that's why they aren’t up your back. Stop criticizing Jerusalem I am just trying to keep us afloat while also retaining the holiness of the city so that B”H when Mashiach comes we can build the third Beit Hamikdash in a holy city, not a desolate one. BERAB: SUDDENLY YOU CARE ABOUT MASHIACH? YA RIGHT, IF YOU REALLY CARED ABOUT MASHIACH YOU WOULD STOP DELAYING REDEMPTION AND JOIN ME IN THE ORDINATION PROCESS!! IBN HABIB: THAT IS NOT HOW YOU BRING MASHIACH AND IF YOU REALLY WANT TO REINSTATE SMICHA, IT IS GONNA BE OVER MY DEAD BODY!! BERAB: if that's what it takes, then maybe we should get this match started... IBN HABIB: Again, that is not how you bring Mashiach, Mashiach will only come if we follow the words of the Torah strictly and continue to do good deeds. And last time I checked, Murder isn’t really permitted... BERAB: IBN HABIB!! GOSH STOP BEING SO LITERAL, I hope you can take a punch better than you take a joke. IBN HABIB: Fine, come at me bro, since you’re SO eager on making the first move with Mashiach, what are you waiting for? BERAB: I’m not so eager I’m just reading the Maimonides, if you don’t think that's what he meant, why don’t we just ask him? IBN HABIB: ha, good one you are just so full of ---------- [MAIMONIDES BLOWS THE WHISTLE TO CALL OFF THE FIGHTING. HE MOTIONS FOR THE RABBI’S TO GO BACK TO THEIR CORNER.] G: WOW! I honestly didn’t think they were gonna make it the match, I thought they were gonna go at it right there. K: WOAH! I haven’t seen an argument that dirty since we had Ibn Ezra and Rashbam down here.
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