ATE AND NATIONAL NEWS, NEWSMAKER INTERVIEWS, OPINION, A PUBLICATION OF THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY

Anne went to work for East­ Partnerships man Kodak Credit Corp, where she worked with district leasing The Gay Alliance appreciates managers and their custom­ the continuing partnership ers, from Michigan east and all of businesses within our down the eastern seaboard. community who support Anne was at Kodak for 16 our mission and vision. years. "From Leasing I went mto Corporate Audit for seven Gold: years," she said. "That work was interesting because the focus MetLife is on processes, efficiency and internal controls. One learns Silver: how to manage a number of competing priorities and how to learn new things very quick­ Excellus rt.' ly. The big perk was the inter­ MorganStanLey national audit trips, which were SmithBarney Anne Wakeman fascinating. Twice a year, audi­ tors were scheduled for three Meet Anne to four weeks on international Youth rally breaks audit trips, so I've been blessed .T'mI~Y!~k~ Wakeman, Interim to have worked in Argentina, the silence about Executive Director Uruguay, Japan, France, UK hatred, bullying NIXON PEABODYLLP and Germany, and love hear­ of the Gay Alliance ing about other people's travels By Susan Jordan By Susan Jordan as well. Over 150 youth kept silent A?ne Wakeman, newly "As the Assistant to the as they filed into Tilt on April appomted Interim Executive Director of Corporate Audit, 20. They had been silent all day Director of the Gay Alliance part of the position included as part of the annual national TOMPKINrS of the Genesee Valley, has been worldwide risk assessment and event, sponsored by GLSEN, to Enterprises a contractor at the agency for scheduling of the 35-plus audi­ honor the voices ofLGBT youth four years, writing grants with tors. lost to hate violence, or driven to Bronze: suicide by bullying. c.or:t~~ct management respon­ "After Audit, I really want­ sIbIlItieS and other financial ed to round out my experi­ At 4 p.m., Youth Group per­ formers took the stage under iliut:&E~ matters. Her expertise with ence and worked in Market Kreis's music thrilled the youth NY Finqer Lakes the whirling, multicolored disco n~mbers and her experience R~search for seven years. In until it was time for their dance, wIth the GAGV and its staff thIs role, the work included lights. They were Dontaee, Can­ dace, Zach, Caryn, Dezi, Alex, which went on until 7 p.m. will enable her to take the reins branding, competitive intel­ On the national scene ... PROFESSIONAL TUTORING SERVICE Courtney, Mary and Elaine. during the transition period, as ligence and numerous other As 8,000 schools around the . Each one said something that E the GAGV board seeks a per­ studies. Most interesting was country observed DoS, spokes­ the long-term work in multi­ bemg LGBT is NOT: "unnatu­ ~Bausch&lomb manent ED. men of the homophobic Right cu~tural ?Iarkets and healthy ral, bad, a sin, being confused, Perle(li~Yision.EnhancingUfe ~ Anne grew up in Chili and urged "Christian" students to wrong, stupid, an illness," etc. majored in finance at the Uni­ agmg. WIth multicultural mar­ harass their gay classmates, and ITT E}:E LI 5 Then they each stated what versity of Buffalo and received kets, I specialized in the LGBT claimed that the Day of Silence THE POWER OF INGENUITY being lesbian, gay, bisexual her MBA in accounting from market and helped influence represents "bullying" of those and/or transgender IS: "Beau­ ~IT. Her work experience Kodak's advertising spend and whose "religious belief" is that tiful, amazing, natural, good, mcludes a variety of financial marketing to the LGBT com­ gay people should not exist: and marketing roles. As a com­ munity and participated in the here, everywhere" - and finally "ME." ' "This is not about tolerat­ Xittelb erger ~THE mercial lender in banking, she CMO's lecture series. ONROEPIAN ing any issue or person. It is ~ . """"2S. ~' M said, "I learned how to work "The healthy aging project Then came the countdown Florlsl&G\t\!'> - FOR~&CAL about a radical and forced agen­ with customers and was pro­ was a 10-month initiative to to the moment the youth had been waiting for all day. They da of homosexuality that these fessionally trained in customer develop products for elders, and [days J of silence are promoting, management." From banking involved focus groups, market broke the silence with deafen­ ing cheers, shouts, laughter and s~on~ored by the GLSEN orga­ definition/planning, and work­ lllzatlOn and sometimes under the shrilling of plastic whistles ing with leading geriatricians to pressure by the schools. In that shaped like red lips. understand the special needs of situation, parents and students Pride Agenda individuals as they age. Erik Libey of AIDS Care, Wagmans who is also a Gay Alliance Youth ought to protest. They should "I left Kodak in 2007 and not be forced to participate, Spring Dinner is Group volunteer, told the youth started my own independent or bullied or pressured in any Champion: that he was going to be mar­ set for May 19 consulting business. In 2008 way to participate in the Day ried the next day. They respond­ General tickets are on sale the Gay Alliance became one of of Silence. I would encourage my clients." ed with wild applause and Erik now for the Pride Agenda's parents to contact the school Anne lives in Penfield and introduced singer Levi Kreis as Spring Dinner on Saturday, May authorities and express their has a 13-year-old daughter and the writer of his wedding song - 19 at the Rochester Riverside concerns over this issue," said CD a 16-year-old son. She says, "I ''All Over Again." ultra-rightwing Liberty Counsel UTlandish Convention Center. Erik said that he had asked Videos. Gifts fi Leather like the yin and yang of my president Mat Staver. The reception starts at 5:45 Levi to sing the song at his wed­ p.m. and the dinner and pro­ roots in Chili and present-day On April 14, six days before in Penfield." ding, and Levi had said, "Your CORNING gram begin at 7 p.m. Comedian the Day of Silence, Kenneth But as the Interim Executive wed~ing is the day after the Day fJ - and out actor Stephen Guarino Weishuhn, a 14-year-old gay stu­ Jl ~ Canandaigua Director for the Gay Alliance, of SIlence - does anything hap­ will be on hand to emcee. Ste­ pen in Rochester?" Erik said (Youth rally continues page 6) ~ND"'NDENCE~A • ~k'tTrust phen is known for the ground­ Ann~ feels she is not taking just he had replied, "It sure does!" breaking sketch comedy series any Job. Her personal experi­ P GALAX~ ~ ence of discrimination has con- and he asked Levi to perform at EMPIRE STATE "The Big Gay Sketch Show," the Breaking the Silence rally. Contents COLLEGE the film "BearCity," and his (Wakeman continues page 6) Equal=Groullds Newsfronts ...... 4 Coilce House & Gili House recurring role as Derrick in the Interview: Jamie Nabozny ...... 7 hit ~BC" comedy series "Happy Making The Scene ...... 10 Endmgs. Library news ...... 12 Episcopal bishop Prince G. JCC exhibit ...... 17 Singh will receive the Commu­ Prideupdate ...... 18 nity Service Award. Columnists ...... 22 The Church of St . Luke & .. Community ...... 25 St. Simon Cyrene V Pride Agenda organizers say, "Last year's event helped us Entertainment: South Pacific ... 27 Friend: build momentum to secure mar­ Gay Alliance News ...... 30 riage for all loving, committed Calendar ...... 34 Classifieds ...... 34 W&>lbright couples in New York State the Group ~4 very next month. Now it's time 11' to celebrate with you and come '@' viCTORY t hird !'_l±!.~~ together for the work still to Presbyterian GaXf~m~~£~ ChurCh come! General tickets are on sale now. Go to takeaction@pride­ Proud Publisher of New York State's Oldest LGBT Publication UPstale Tattoo Co. agenda.org." • 2 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

~ ;I

The Empty Closet is published by the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500 Rochester, New York 14605 FROM TH © 2011, All rights reserved. Editor·in·Chief: Susan Jordan Empty C Editor m Executive Staff Reporter: Ove Overmyer Graphic Design: Jim Anderson SUSAN JORDAN ANNE WAKEMAN Staff Photographer: Jim Wilkins Advertising policy: "I am happy 'Bully' will The Empty Closet does not print advertise­ Closet and other vital historical ments that contain nude drawings or pho­ maintain its authenticity and records, which have been digi­ tographs, nor does it print advertising that will be an accurate portray­ tized and are now searchable states that the person pictured in the ad is for sale, or that you will "get" that particular al of what thousands of kids online. Shoulders to Stand On person if you patronize the establishment experience every day," said But­ is the archival and documenta­ advertised. Advertisements that are explicitly racist, sexist, ageist, ableist or homophobic ler, who was outraged that the ry project which will celebrate will be refused; advertisements from organi­ MPAA gave "Bully" an "R" rat­ Rochester's LGBT history. zations that are sexist, racist, ageist, ableist ing by just one vote because of The Gay Alliance is also or anti-gay will also be refused. All politi­ cal advertisements must contain information brief language. moving forward as a vital driv­ about who placed them and a method of Butler was backed by Prop 8 er for the LGBT and Ally com­ contact. Additionally, The Empty Closet does not print negative or "attack" advertisements, legal hotshots David Olson and munity, with ever-improving whether they relate to a product or politics Ted Boies, and by Ellen DeGe­ advocacy, education and com­ and no matter in whose interest the ad is neres, NFL quarterback Drew munity programming in the being produced. A negative advertisement is defined as one that focuses upon a rival Brees, pop singers Demi Lova­ Finger Lakes Region and well product, or in the political area, a rival elec­ to and Justin Bieber, American beyond. tion candidate or party, in order to point out supposed flaws and to persuade the pub­ Idol host Randy Jackson, Meryl With market research, lic not to buy it (or vote for him or her). The Streep, Johnny Depp, Michael we know that the Alliance's Empty Closet maintains, within legal bound­ Jordan and CNN's Anderson aries, neutrality regarding products, political "Bully" and youth Looking forward visibility has growth oppor­ candidates and parties. However, "attack" Cooper, among others. tunities. In the Finger Lakes ads that fail to provide undisputable evidence leadership But it was Katy herself who I have consulted at the Gay Region alone, there are around that the information in the ad is true do not Alliance since 2008 and now further in any way the objectives and poli­ In February, Georgetown stu­ made it happen. If she had given 120,000 LGBT individuals, cies of the Gay Alliance or The Empty Closet, dent Sandra Fluke won nation­ up after the initial rebuff from the Board has asked me to step and many times that number including the primary tenet that The Empty in as Interim Executive Direc­ Closet's purpose is to inform the Rochester al attention by continuing to the MPAA, the film would still with our straight allies includ­ gay community and to provide an impartial stand up for women's rights be off limits to those who need tor, while a thorough search ed. All need to be aware of the forum for ideas. for the next Executive Direc­ after being publicly defamed as to see it most. Now, hundreds Gay Alliance, its resources and Submissions: a slut and prostitute by Rush of thousands of youth - poten­ tor begins. The privilege of the its advocacy and educational For publication, submit news items, ads, tial victims, and also the bullies interim position, the trust to services, and all should have photos, letters, stories, poetry, ads, pho­ Limbaugh and the AFA. Last tographs or art by mail or in person to The month we celebrated the initia­ and those who passively witness do the job and to follow Sue the opportunity to participate Empty Closet office by the 15th of the month. tive and persistence of another bullying - will see it and their Cowell (who for 35 years has in Alliance community events. Design services for non-camera ready ads been and will continue to be an are available for a fee. (www.emptycloset@ courageous young woman - lives may change in a positive It is the sharing of your gagv.us) way. Lives may even be saved. active force in the LGBT and time, talents and financial gifts Michigan student Katy Butler. Publication Information: Butler's experience with It's heartening to see young ally community) is an honor. which makes this agency such The Empty Closet is published 11 times a school bullying, including hav­ women and men standing up The opportunity to work with a vital member of our commu­ year (December and January combined) by such an extraordinary staff The Empty Closet Press for the Gay Alliance ing her finger broken in the sev­ for justice, like the young mem­ nity. The Spring Appeal is now of the Genesee Valley, Inc. Approximately enth grade by bullies, led her to bers of Occupy Rochester, doing important work makes in full force. In addition to the 5000 copies of each issue are distributed non-violent resisters of econom­ each day a genuine pleasure. opportunity to donate in honor during the first week of the month, some by start the campaign on Change. mail in a plain sealed envelope. The pub­ org to pressure the Motion Pic­ ic and social inequality, who Over the years, I've seen of Sue Cowell, there's also per­ lication of the name or photograph of any ture Association of America were ejected from Washing­ the changes taking place. I sonal testimony by Christopher person or organization in articles is not an witnessed staff, the Board and indication of the sexual or affectional orien­ (MPAA) to change the "R" rat­ ton Square Park on March 30. Hennelly, which can be read, tation of that person or the members of that ing of Lee Hirsch's "Bully," the Another example is Alabama our loyal donors and spon­ but I'd also encourage you to organization. For further information, please student Elizabeth Garrett, who sors keeping the agency mov­ view it via the Agency's You­ write to The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main St., award-winning documentary Rochester NY. 14605, call (585) 244-9030 about the epidemic of school recently got her school system ing during the state's financial tube channel at www.youtube. or e-mail [email protected]. bullying. to accept pro-gay t-shirts and crisis, which reduced funding com/useriGayAlliance. The use The Empty Closet is the official publi­ cation of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee "We can't make schools safer allow gay couples at their prom. in 2010. I saw the bold stra­ of multimedia and social media Valley, Inc., as stated in the bylaws of that or change hearts and minds on It was also encouraging to hear tegic moves to have the Gay has transformed the world and organization. Its purpose is to inform the Alliance produce Pride, and Rochester gay community about local and the issue of bullying if we're Rev. Jim Mulcahy, who was Christopher's testimony is national gay-related news and events; to blocking important films like interviewed in the April EC, bring LGBT elder issues to the especially powerful in his own provide a forum for ideas and creative work 'Bully' from reaching the audi­ talking about the courageous forefront with the merger with words. from the local gay community; to help pro­ mote leadership within the community, and ences they most need to reach," young leaders of the LGBT Rainbow SAGE. And we con­ If you haven't had an oppor­ to be a part of a national network of lesbian she said. She delivered a peti­ freedom movement in Ukraine. tinue to look forward. tunity to donate this month, and gay publications that exchange ideas In 2013, the Gay Alli­ and seek to educate. tion of over 500,000 signatures "It's exciting to see young peo­ please go to our website, www. Part of our purpose is to maintain a calling on the MPAA to lower ple risking their lives for their ance celebrates its 40th year. gayalliance.org. No gift is too middle position with respect to the entire the rating from "R" to "PG-13." ideals," he said. This upcoming anniversary small and sustaining gifts, with community. We must be careful to present all viewpoints in a way that takes into con­ At first the MPAA refused But­ If we're looking for heroes, is nothing short of remark­ an amount/month automati­ sideration the views of all - women, men, ler, citing "consistency." But on we can honor and support able. The Gay Alliance Library cally donated, are an incred­ people of color, young and old, and those from various walks of life. April 6, "Bully" received a PG these youth and also the young and David Bohnett Founda­ ibly useful way to support the The opinions of columnists, editorial writ­ 13 rating. Despite three minor women and men of the Gay tion Cyber Center contain a Agency. ers and other contributing writers are their edits, a major scene that had Alliance Youth Group, who large and rich LGBT collection Always know that it is with own and do not necessarily reflect the col­ lective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the caused the R rating is intact. bravely broke the Silence on in traditional and multimedia extraordinary gratitude that we Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. The "Bully" was screened at the April20. formats, with computer access. thank you for your past and Empty Closet shall not be liable for any loss or expense that results from the publication Little Theatre on April 20, with They are leaders, not of The Archives have a collection continuing support and par­ (whether correctly or incorrectly) or omis­ a Talk Back. tomorrow, but of today. • of over 40 years of The Empty ticipation . • sion of an ad. In the event of non-payment, your account may be assigned to a collec­ tion agency or an attorney, and will be liable for the charges paid by us to such collection agency or attorney. ~N~a------~m~e~______• Many things -----. Letters to the editor: - The opinions of columnists, editorial writers Address and other contributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective ~C~it~y~/S~t~a~te~/=Z~i p~______• attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. We will print let­ • ~P~h~o~ne~______• ters at the editor's discretion and on a space available basis. Only one letter by the same E-mail writer in a six-month period is allowed. We • Libra.ry 8f will not print personal attacks on individuals, Rflnl MEMBERSHIP LEVELS: BU U ArchIVeS nor will we be a forum for ongoing disputes • 0$30-99 Advocate 0 $100-999 Champion • between individuals. We reserve the right 0$1,000-4,999 Triangle Club 0 $5,000+ Stonewall to edit for space and clarity. We will print S&[?~ o Enclosed is my check in the amount of (check # __) anonymous letters if the name and phone • Please charge my credit card in the amount of; ____ • number are provided to the Editor; confi­ dentiality will be respected. Submissions are ONE To; 0 American Express, 0 Discover, 0 MasterCard, 0 Visa due by the 15th of the month at; The Empty Credit card # Exp. Date; ___ Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Roch­ • THE EMPTY CLOSET · YOUTH PROGRAM · ROCHESTER PRIDE • o I would be proud to have my donation publicly acknowledged. ester, NY 14605; e-mail; emptycloset@gagv. EDUCATION PROGRAM & SPEAKERS BUREAU us. Online edition of EC available at www. Please provide me Rainbow SAGE Program (age 50+) News COMMUNITY SAFETY PROGRAM & ANTI-VIOLENCE PROJECT o gayalliance.org. • INQUEERY · LIBRARY AND ARCHIVES • GAY ALLIANCE RESOURCE DIRECTORY Benefits include: a subscription to The Empty Closet rnailed to horne or work, SHOULDERS TO STAND ON • RAINBOW SAGE · SAFEZONE plus privileges at each level. Phone; 585 244-8640 or Mail to; Gay Alliance, • 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, New York 14605. Horne delivery of • The Gay Alliance plays a central role in advocating for 'At The Empty Closet is free with your annual rnernbership in the Gay Alliance. 5/12. the fair and equal treatment of all people, regardless of their V • sexual orientation, gender identity or gender .expression. Gav Alliance • www.GayAlllance.org 'J of the genesee va ll ey to Many people • ------MAY 2012 • NUMBER 456 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET 3

way for making her life hell by holding employee prayer meet­ HEALTH ings inside the restaurant where s she worked for six years. "He not only threatened her New guide helps soul, but he also threatened her with hospital LOCAL AND STATE livelihood," said Derek Smith, a lawyer for Salemi. "He thought visitation rights praying might cure her of her The Human Rights Cam­ sexuality, but she is someone paign and the American Health who didn't need to be saved." Lawyers Association on April 11 The Manhattan jury ordered released a new healthcare guide, the restaurant owner and Mary Revisiting Your Hospital's Visi­ Ann's to fork over $1.2 mil­ tation Policy, to assist hospital lion in punitive damages and administrators in revising hospital $400,000 in compensatory visitation policies to satisfy new damages to Salemi, who quit requirements barring discrimina­ in 2007. tion against LGBT patients and their families. L.I. pharmacist The Joint Commission stan­ arrested for HIV dards and the new Medicare Con­ ditions of Participation (CoPs) meds re-sale require hospitals to explain to all m5OOe1. The New York Attorney Gen­ patients their right to choose who may visit them during an inpa­ CAli 1210112011 eral's office has announced the tient stay, regardless of whether PAY fIVE TMOUSAHD OOUARS AND 00 CENTS arrest of a Long Island MOMS pharmacist and three others who the visitor is a family member, .1AWACJI.L - a spouse, a domestic partner, or ! PAYTO THE ORDER OF --"$5.000.00 have been accused reselling HIV ~g9CJ~J~§r,.R,ENUE [ ROCHESTER NY 14607 - - medications which had been paid another type of visitor. These for by Medicaid. The drugs resold changes also protect patients' right on the black market may have to choose a representative to act on expired or are otherwise unusable, their behalf, requiring hospitals to putting patients at grave risk for give deference to patients' wishes potentially fatal infections. concerning their representatives. A pharmacist at the high­ Revisiting Your Hospital's Visita­ volume national HIV drug mar­ tion Policy can be viewed at www. keting business, which has sites healthlawyers.org/HospitalVisit. in Brooklyn, Manhattan, and "The Joint Commission stan­ on Long Island, is charged along dards and the regulations from the Rich Fowler, Consumer and Community Relations Manager, at AIDS Care, Jill Baker, Marketplace with three outside conspirators Centers for Medicare and Med­ Macy's, Jennifer Pettiti, Marketplace Macy's and William Kearns, Marketplace Macy's, at the check of running a $274 million black icaid Services have set us on the presentation. market venture. By relabeling path to LGBT healthcare equality," prescription drugs of uncertain said HRC President Joe Solmo­ Macy's gives AIDS ing this grant only further Lesbian chef wins nese. "But even with this progress, enhances the quality of care quality and origin, the defen­ Care $5000 Shop $1.6 million in dants allegedly preyed on patients the most well-intentioned hospital and service we can provide to administrator may need help to our patients and clients, as well abuse lawsuit with HIV and cost the Medicaid and Wrap grant program $155 million in New best serve LGBT patients. We are as raising community awareness proud to partner with the Ameri­ Marketplace Mall Macy's and bringing together groups A NYC lesbian chef has won York. MOMS, whose parent is representatives, William Kearns, a $1.6M lawsuit against her for­ listed as Allion Healthcare, a can Health Lawyers Association from different organizations to to provide this important resource, Jennifer Pettiti, and Jill Baker, volunteer for our cause." mer employer, who would gath­ Melville, L.I.-based company, presented AIDS Care with er staffers together to pray aloud billed New York State Medic­ which complements our National Additionally, The Market­ LGBT Healthcare Equality Index the New York State West Dis­ place Macy's has again selected that God would cure the gay aid for at least $155 million for trict grant of $5000 to support ones. these unusable drugs, accord­ for healthcare facilities." AIDS Care as the benefactor Revisiting Your Hospital's Vis­ the annual Shop and Wrap on of their annual "Bag Hunger" Jurors awarded lesbian chef ing to New York State Attorney March 21. Mirella Salemi the payout in her General Eric Schneiderman. The itation Policy is a primer on what campaign which takes place in hospitals need to know to comply GALAXe Pride at Work battle against the former owner AG's office says Allion cooper- the summer months when food with accrediting criteria and founded the Shop and Wrap ini­ of Mary Ann's on West Broad- (L.I. continues on page 6) feder­ pantry supplies are more scarce al regulations on LGBT-inclusive tiative, which is now in its 20th and school meal programs are healthcare. As health care facilities year serving patients and clients not offered. Jill Baker will con­ transition to more LGBT-friendly of AIDS Care. tinue as the Macy's Executive­ policies and procedures, they can The Shop and Wrap is an in-Charge of the "Bag Hunger" turn to HRC's Healthcare Equal­ annual holiday event spon­ event. ity Index (HEI) for expert guid­ sored in partnership by both About AIDS Care ance, assessing their policies and Macy's and the Xerox Com­ AIDS Care was formed by operations against established best munity Involvement Program. the January 1, 2010 merger practices for LGBT-inclusive care. It involves over 50 volunteers of AIDS Community Health The HEI also helps LGBT comprised of representatives Center and AIDS Rochester. patients find health care free of from Macy's, GALAXe Pride at AIDS Care was created to bring prejudice and discrimination, Work and AIDS Care, as well together all the HIV/AIDS ser­ empowering them to seek out as friends, families and local vices patients and clients may healthcare providers who embrace LGBT colleagues involved with need under one roof and it is the LGBT healthcare equality. Learn the aforementioned organiza­ only organization in the Finger more at www.hrc.org/hei. While tions. Lakes region exclusively focused the HEI is a vital tool for health­ Volunteers shop for neces­ on providing HIV/AIDS care care facilities and patients, all sary items such as personal care and services. LGBT individuals can protect products (shampoo, bandages, AIDS Community Health themselves from health care dis­ and toothbrushes), home clean­ Center, formerly known as crimination by creating legal doc­ ing and paper products, warm Community Health Network, uments, including a living will winter scarves and gloves, and was founded in 1989 by two Tom Privitere accepts his award. Photo: Ove Overmyer and healthcare power of attorney. simple holiday treats before­ Infectious Disease physicians as Learn more at www.hrc.org/pro­ hand. The group then joins a community medical and diag­ Black Trade Unionists tecl'-your-rights. together at AIDS Care on a nostic clinic for those who were Last year, The Joint Com­ Saturday morning in early infected with HIV/AIDS. AIDS give award to Tom Privitere mission released a field guide December to fill and wrap holi­ Rochester was established 26 By Ove Overmyer on LG BT patienHentered care: day boxes for those in need. In years ago as part of the New Tom Privtiere, Gay Alliance board member and long time union Advancing Effective Commu­ December 2011, over 60 volun­ York State Health Department's activist, was given the Bill Lucy Award at the 12th Annual Coali­ nication, Cultural Competence, teers participated and 200 boxes network of Community Service tion of Black Trade Unionists (CBTU) at Rick's Prime Rib House on and Patient- and Family-Centered were filled and wrapped to ben­ Programs (CSPs). April 20. Care for the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexu­ efit the patients and clients at The main offices of both Privitere is the NYS Public Employees Federation Director of Field al, and Transgender Community. AIDS Care, many of whom are organizations moved to one Services for WNY and the Vice President of the Rochester Finger The field guide urges U.S. hospi­ too ill to work, have families to facility at 259 Montoe Avenue Lakes Chapter of Pride at Work, AFL-CIO. He was acknowledged for tals to create a more welcoming, support and lor rely on public in October 2009. The new his lifetime commitment to working people. safe, and inclusive environment assistance, and cannot afford phone number for AIDS Care's Bill Lucy is a civil rights and labor union icon. He co-founded for LGBT patients and their fam­ basic personal care necessities. main office is 585-545-7200 CBTU in September of 1972. CBTU consists of members from 77 ilies. The Joint Commission is ''AIDS Care is very grate­ and the company's new website international and national labor unions with 42 chapters across the the nation's largest accrediting ful for the support from Macy's can be found at www.acRoches­ country. The Rochester Chapter is arguably one of the strongest orga­ organization for healthcare facil­ throughout the years," says ter.org. AIDS Care also main­ nizations in the nation. ities, responsible for accrediting Michael Beatty, Senior Vice tains satellite locations in Bath, CBTU seeks to fulfill the dream of Dr. Martin Luther King to and certifying more than 19,000 President and Chief Operating Geneva, and on Central Avenue build a national movement that would result in economic, social and healthcare organizations and pro­ Officer at AIDS Care. "Receiv- in downtown Rochester. political justice for every American . • grams in the United States . • 4 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

transgender murder victims, 42 percent of had previously led the charge in 1972-73 transgender women killed last year were to remove homosexuality from the list of engaged in sex work at the time of their mental disorders in the Diagnostic and s murder. NCAVP denounces violence Statistical Manual (DSM) of the Ameri­ against LGBTQ and all sex workers and can Psychiatric Association. ''At the time, seeks to raise awareness of the violence this was a shocking story that captured faced by LGBTQidentified sex workers. the nation's attention," said TWO's Besen. NATIONAL AND INTERNATIONAL NCAVP is working with its member "Dr. Spitzer was the last person in Amer­ organization in Detroit, Equality Michi­ ica one would have expected to produce gan, to offer assistance with their efforts a study bolstering the claims of 'ex-gay' to support the community during this activists." Catholic students are tion after a few more wrinkles are worked critical time. NCAVP encourages anyone According to the American Prospect out. who has experienced violence to contact article: angry at anti-gay The Post provides some more details: a local anti-violence program for support "In retrospect, I have to admit I think indoctrination in school The House of Deputies approved the and to document this violence. For help the critiques [of my study] are largely cor­ law in a close 58-56 vote, seven years after locating an anti-violence program in your rect," Dr. Spitzer told the American Pros­ Knowing that they'd be eligible to it was first proposed. The Senate passed area, visit www.ncavp.org. pect in an article by Gabriel Arana titled, vote in November, the administrators of the law in November. Some passages In the Rochester area, call the Com­ My So Called Ex-Gay Life. "The findings a Minnesota Catholic high school held a remain to be finalized in a commission of munity Safety program of the Gay Alli­ can be considered evidence for what those seniors-only assembly in order to indoc­ senators and House lawmakers. ance at 244-8640 ext. 19, or email Kelly who have undergone ex-gay therapy say trinate the entire class against same-sex .. .After Zamudio died in late March, Clark at [email protected] . about it, but nothing more." marriage. The reaction of the students was the U.N. High Commissioner for Human He said he spoke with the editor of the unexpected. Rights called for Chile to pass new laws Archives of Sexual Behavior about writ­ "The first three-quarters of the presen­ See the 10 ways against hate crimes and discrimination. ing a retraction, but the editor declined. tation were really good," said senior Matt Some Protestant churches had opposed healthcare reform (Repeated attempts to contact the journal Bliss. "They talked about what is mar­ the anti-discrimination law, saying it impacts LGBT people went unanswered.) riage and how marriage helps us as a soci­ could be a first step toward gay marriage, Spitzer said that he was proud of hav­ On March 26, the first day of US ety. Then it started going downhill when which Chile forbids and which is not ing been instrumental in removing homo­ Supreme Court oral arguments for the they started talking about single parents explicitly included in the measure. The sexuality from the list of mental disorders. Affordable Care Act (ACA), Kellan Baker and adopted kids. They didn't directly Roman Catholic Church also expressed Now 80 and retired, he was afraid that the outlined 10 things health reform does say it, but they implied that kids who are some concerns about the law. 2001 study would tarnish his legacy and for LGBT Americans in a feature for the adopted or live with single parents are less The law describes as illegal discrimina­ perhaps hurt others. He said that failed than kids with two parents of the opposite tion "any distinction, exclusion or restric­ Center for American Progress. attempts to rid oneself of homosexual Data collection to better understand sex. They implied that a 'normal' family is tion that lacks reasonable justification, attractions "can be quite harmful." He LG BT health disparities and a diverse and the best family. committed by agents of the state or indi­ has, though, no doubts about the 1973 culturally competent healthcare work­ "When they finally got to gay mar­ viduals, and that causes the deprivation, fight over the classification of homosexu­ force are included in the list. riage, [students] were really upset," said disturbance or threatens the legitimate ality. Bliss. "You could look around the room exercise of fundamental rights." For more information and to take a "Had there been no Bob Spitzer, and feel the anger. My friend who is a les­ Towleroad comments: It's too bad it quiz, see: homosexuality would still have eventually http://www.americanprogress.org/ bian started crying, and people were cry­ took Zamudio's brutal beating to finally been removed from the list of psychiatric ing in the bathroom." issues/20 12/0 31 aca_ top _10 _lgbt.html get this law moving again, but at least his disorders," he said. "But it wouldn't have Bliss was one of several students who death was not in vain. happened in 1973." stood up to argue with the representatives Read more: http://www.towleroad. Dr. Robert Spitzer Spitzer was growing tired and asked from the archdiocese. One girl held up a coml 2012/041 chile-passes-gay-discrim­ repudiates study used how many more questions I had. Noth­ sign that said, "I love my moms." ination-protections-following-daniel­ ing, I responded, unless you have some­ Mike O'Keefe, a spokesman for the zamudios-death.html#ixzz1rBLfkmu3 by anti-gay groups thing to add. He did. Would I print a school, claimed that other students were retraction of his 2001 study, "So I don't In a move that serves as a significant angry that some of the students spoke have to worry about it anymore"? blow to "ex-gay" programs and anti-gay out and thought that some of them were Detroit transwoman Dr. Spitzer's research was particularly "rude" to the visitors from the archdio­ organizations, Dr. Robert Spitzer repudi­ found dead; no arrests ated his much-criticized 2001 study that harmful because he was the only non­ cese. "We weren't being rude," coun­ socially conservative scientist to produce The National Coalition of Anti-Vio­ claimed some "highly motivated" homo­ tered Lydia Hannah, another student who a study claiming some people could "pray lence Programs (NCAVP) reported on sexuals could go from gay to straight. His spoke out. "But people were upset, and we away the gay." April 4 about the murder of Coko Wil­ retraction occurred in an American Pros­ weren't just going to sit there." "This man is an atheist, so he's not liams, a transgender woman, in Detroit, pect magazine article that hit newsstands According to one student, the present­ Bible thumping and doesn't have an ax to Michigan. April1l. ers compared gay relationships to bes­ grind," said Greg Quinlan, President of Witnesses stated that suspects in the Spitzer's rejection of his own research, tiality. That was also met with great Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays (PFOX), killing fled the scene. No arrests have yet which was originally published in the objections. in an October 7,2011 interview on News­ been made in connection with Ms. Wil­ prestigious Archives of Sexual Behavior, is -JoeMyGod.com Plus with Mark Segraves. "He just decid­ liams' death. It has been widely reported a devastating blow to "ex-gay" organiza­ ed, let's talk about this ex-gay thing and that the murder occurred near Palmer tions because it decisively eliminates their see if it's true. And he has concluded it can Chile passes pro-gay law Park in an area of Detroit known for sex most potent claim that homosexuality can be true for people who are highly moti­ work. However, it is not known if Ms. be reversed through therapy and prayer. after Zamudio killing vated to change." PFOX currently has a Williams was engaged in sex work at the "Dr. Spitzer's repudiation of his 2001 video of Dr. Spitzer on the front page of Seven years after first being proposed, time of her murder. study is an earthquake that severely under­ its website. and only a week after gay man Daniel NCAVP's most recent report, Hate mines the validity of 'ex-gay' programs," "Virtually every anti-gay organization Zamudio died from injuries sustained Violence Against Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, said Truth Wins Out's Executive Direc­ in the country quotes Dr. Spitzer's work," during an attack by four neo-Nazis, on Transgender, Queer and HIV-Affected tor Wayne Besen, who criticized the study said TWO's Wayne Besen. "It will be an April 4 Chile's House passed anti-dis­ Communities in the United States in in his 2003 book, Anything But Straight: Integrity Test to see which groups remove crimination legislation that includes gay 2010, documented 27 anti-LGBTQmur­ Unmasking the Scandals and Lies Behind citations of his work in the coming week. people - in spite of the fact that Catholic ders, the second highest yearly total ever the Ex-Gay Myth. "Spitzer just kicked out Those who continue to use his study to and Protestant churches disapproved. recorded by the coalition. the final leg from the stool on which the back their agenda are deliberately mislead­ The nation's Senate, the Washing­ Transgender women made up 44 per­ proponents of 'ex-gay' therapy based their ing people and we intend to hold them ton Post reports, approved the bill last cent of the 27 reported hate murders in already shaky claims of success." November. President Sebastian Pinera, a accountable." 2010, while representing only 11 percent Spitzer's 2001 study was a surprise This is not the first major "ex-gay" supporter of the law, will sign the legisla- of total survivors and victims. Among and created a media firestorm because he

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[email protected] Call (585) 729-9908. Mention this ad to receive $20 off your initi~ll hour session! MAY 2012 • NUMBER 456 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET 5 study to be debunked. For decades, anti­ put a national spotlight on this movie and buys are made. The internet, after all, has vulnerabilities of transgender people in gay organizations gleefully pointed to its mission," said Butler, who started her no boundaries. But here's what goes on the family law context. I hope transgen­ Homosexuality in Perspective, a 1979 book campaign on Change.org after experienc­ just a few of countries targeted by NOM: der people will read and share it with their written by Dr. William H. Masters and ing severe bullying in school. "The brief United Arab Emirates: Homosexuals attorneys as they plan a family, navigate Virginia E. Johnson, that claimed to cure usage of language in this film reflects can be put to death. the dissolution of a relationship or a custo­ gayness. Indeed, the husband-and-wife what so many kids hear each day in Kuwait: Homosexuals can be impris­ dy dispute, or simply seek to protect their sex research team went on Meet the Press school when they're being bullied. No one oned for ten years. rights and those of their children." on April 22, 1979 to discuss their find­ removes it from the halls and playgrounds Oman: Homosexuals can be impris­ The chapters address a broad range of ings. In his groundbreaking 2009 book, of schools." oned up to three years. topics, including: Masters of Sex, author Thomas Maier Ben Rattray, founder and CEO of It cannot be any plainer. Taking a page Culturally Competent Representation, discovered that the results of Masters & Change.org, congratulated Butler on her from (homophobic preacher) Scott Lively, Recognition of Name and Sex, Rela­ Johnson's study were entirely fabricated. successful campaign to change the film's NOM is intent on whipping up anti-gay tionship Recognition and Protections, Virginia Johnson acknowledged that the rating to PG-13. hatred in nations where our brothers and Protecting Parental Rights, Relationship results were fake and she had actually "Katy Butler has inspired so many sisters already live their lives in quiet ter­ Dissolution Parental Rights after Rela­ argued in 1978 that the book should never people, and a ratings change, with her ror at best. tionship Dissolution, Custody Disputes have seen the light of day - but it was powerful campaign." said Rattray. "When UPDATE: There is some disagree­ Involving Transgender Children, Protec­ already too late in the publishing process Katy began her campaign, many peo­ ment regarding the UAE gay death pen­ tions for Transgender Youth, Intimate to undo the damage. ple doubted a 17-year-old girl would be alty, which JMG linked from Wikipedia. Partner Violence, Estate Planning and "Fortunately, the Archives of Sexual able to change Bully's rating. Change. The ILGA says that issue is unclear. Elder Law. Behavior can honor Dr. Spitzer's wishes org empowers people to stand up to bul­ Whether sodomy is punished with In addition to chapters authored by and retract his study," said TWO's Besen. lies everywhere, from the classroom to the death penalty remains in dispute. The Levi and Monnin-Browder, contributors "They have an ethical and moral obliga­ boardroom. Today's news is yet another Arabic text of article 354 is ambiguously to Transgender Family Law: A Guide tion to act as quickly as possible to right example of people using Change.org and phrased and can be translated in differ­ to Effective Advocacy include Kylar W. this terrible wrong that has fueled anti-gay the power of social networking to turn ent ways. Some sources indicate that the Broadus, Patience Crozier, Benjamin campaigns for more than a decade." Truth seemingly impossible challenges into real article punishes rape of a woman or forced L. Jerner, Michelle B. LaPointe, Mor­ Wins Out praised Dr. Spitzer, saying that change." sodomy with a man, while others indicate gan Lynn, Shannon Price Minter, Zack his admission has solidified his legacy as Butler said that the awareness her peti­ that it punishes rape on women and sod­ M. Paakkonen, Terra Slavin, Wayne A. a respected doctor and significant histori­ tion campaign created around bullying omy between men. Thomas Jr., Esq., Deborah H. Wald and cal figure. shows that there is a national movement (*For obvious reasons, Brown does not Janson Wu. "It is never easy to admit wrongdo­ of people who care about this issue and mention the over 640,000 people who ing and Dr. Robert Spitzer deserves much won't let it be silenced. supported Starbucks!) NOM-Romney credit for reversing course," said TWO's "I wish 'Bully' was around when I was Besen. "He acted in a noble and honorable in middle school, and experienced some GLAD has guide to connection grows closer manner which is consistent with the vast of the worst bullying I could imagine," Transgender Family Law The ties between Governor Mitt majority of his career." said Butler. "But it makes me incredibly Romney, the presumptive Republican Not one mainstream organization of happy that kids in middle school and high Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defend­ presidential nominee, and the National medical and mental health professionals school today will be able to see a film like ers announces the publication of Trans­ Organization for Marriage, a national has found any evidence to support so­ 'Bully' and share that experience with gender Family Law: A Guide to Effective anti-gay group, are growing deeper by called "ex-gay" therapy; in fact, the evi­ their friends." Advocacy, the first book to comprehen­ the day, the Human Rights Campaign dence they have found suggests that it can sively address legal issues facing transgen­ (HRC) says. actually be harmful to patients. NOM moves Starbucks der people in the family law context and In addition to Romney's "Free and boycott into nations that provide practitioners the tools to effective­ Strong America" PAC giving a $10,000 "Bully" gets PG 13 ly represent transgender clients. contribution to NOM for Proposition rating: youth can now execute homosexuals Featuring chapters by attorneys with 8, HRC has learned that two of NOM's From JoeMyGod.com on April 10: expertise in both family law and transgen­ Directors, Craig D. Cardon and Broc see, learn from film In what may be their single-most out­ der legal advocacy, the book was edited Hiatt, have each donated $2,500 to Rom­ Director Lee Hirsch and The Wein­ rageous and repulsive move yet, NOM is by Jennifer L. Levi, director of GLAD's ney for President, Inc., this cycle (on stein Company have announced that the attempting to whip up anti-gay fervor by Transgender Rights Project, and Elizabeth 6/20111 and 5/17111, respectively). documentary "Bully" received a "PG-13" expanding their Starbucks boycott into E. Monnin-Browder, a litigation associate "The more we learn about Romney's rating from the Motion Picture Associa­ nations that may put homosexuals to in the Boston office of Ropes & Gray and close ties to NOM, the more anti-gay he tion of America (MPAA) in time for the death or have other legal punishments for a former GLAD attorney. Transgender looks - and is," said HRC President Joe film's April 13 expansion to 55 markets, merely being gay. Family Law: A Guide to Effective Advo­ Solmonese. "You can tell a lot about a and that despite three minor edits, a major Brian Brown exults: cacy will be available in bound and elec­ man by the company he keeps, and who scene in the movie that had been at the "In our first week, we gained 25,000* tronic versions in May of 2012. his maxed out donors are." forefront of the film's ratings battle has pledge signers in the U.S. alone; today "Some of the most heartbreaking sto­ Both Cardon and Hiatt are execu­ been kept intact. we go international, expanding Dump­ ries I have heard in my career as an LGBT tives at The Vineyard Group, which gave The MPAA had been at the center of Starbucks.com campaigns into Manda­ legal advocate involve transgender people $160,000 to the Yes on Prop 8 campaign. an extraordinarily popular online peti­ rin, Arabic, Turkish, Spanish, and Bahala in family courts," said Levi, a nationally Both are longtime supporters of Gover­ tion on Change.org, started by bullied (one of the chief languages of Indonesia) recognized expert on transgender legal nor Romney, each giving the maximum high school student Katy Butler, urging DumpStarbucks.com online ads will also issues. "The rights of transgender people - $2,300 donation during his 2008 presi­ the MPAA to drop the film's original start running in Egypt, Beijing, Hong as parents, spouses, and simply as human dential bid, broken down as follows. "R" rating, which was given because of Kong, the Yunnan region of China, Unit­ beings - are often trammeled in family · 1/8/07: Broc Hiatt Contributed some explicit language used by bullies in ed Arab Emirates, Bahrain, Oman and court because of pervasive bias and mis­ $4,200 to Romney For President. the movie. More than 500,000 people, Kuwait. What happens in Seattle won't understanding. Transgender Family Law: · 2/12/07: Broc Hiatt Was Refunded including 35 Members of Congress and to (sic) stay in Seattle. By making gay A Guide to Effective Advocacy is a road $2,100 from Romney For President. celebrities like Ellen DeGeneres, Michael marriage core to his brand, Starbucks map for transgender individuals and their · 3/27/07: Broc Hiatt Contributed Jordan and Meryl Streep, expressed their CEO Howard Schulz is telling millions attorneys to navigate the family court sys­ $200 to Romney For President. support for Butler's petition. of customers and partners who support tem in this evolving area of law." · 1/8/07: Craig D. Cardon Contribut­ "On behalf of the more than half a traditional marriage in the Middle East, "This book tackles a cutting edge area ed $4,200 to Romney For President. million supporters who joined me on China, South America and North Amer­ of family law and we're thrilled to have · 3/5/07: $2,100 Was Refunded To Change.org in petitioning the MPAA, ica that they aren't truly part of the Star­ contributions from some of this coun­ Craig Cardon By Romney For President. I want to express how grateful I am not bucks community." try's most well-respected experts in this [Source: Federal Election Commis­ only to the MPAA for lowering the rat­ Joe Jervis comments: Obviously the field," said Monnin-Browder. "Transgen­ sion] ing without cutting a vital scene, but to ads in Arabic and other languages won't der Family Law: A Guide to Effective Hiatt and Cardon are listed on NOM's Advocacy details the unique needs and all of the people who used their voices to be seen only in the nations where the ad (NOM-Romney continues page 6)

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agreement and divorce were finalized, PAGE ONE but within three months of the agree­ LOCAL NATIONAL AND ment, opposing attorneys started trying AND STATE INTERNATIONAL to reverse it. "They continued to claim that my sexuality was a legitimate rea­ (Youth rally continuedfrom page 1) son as to why I should lose custody. By (L.I. Phamacist from page 3) (NOM-Romney from page 5) 2006, a motion was filed to change the ated in the investigation. 2009 and 2010 tax returns as "Directors" custody arrangement, using the phrase MOMS Pharmacy, which also has an for NOM. 'lesbian lifestyle' again and again and outlet in San Francisco's Castro, says they Romney himself has signed NOM's again, and suggesting that was harmful too are a victim of the scam and will fully virulently anti-gay "marriage pledge" in to my kids." cooperate with federal Medicaid fraud which Romney promises, if elected, to set Although this did not succeed, and investigators. The four men are charged up a presidential commission to "inves­ was finally settled on August 2, 2009, with grand larceny, money laundering, tigate" gay Americans for alleged harass­ she says, "It was emotionally exhaust­ commercial bribery, and other crimes. ment and intimidation. ing and it was abuse. One of the worst Two weeks ago, HRC unearthed secret things you can do to a mother is threat­ Off to Albany: Equality & NOM memos outlining a strategy to en to take her children away." "drive a wedge between gays and blacks." Anne continued, "That really shaped Justice Day is May 8 my attitude toward the Gay Alliance. The Empire State Pride Agenda's Gay-bashing murders The more we can show people who we Equality and Justice Day is May 8 in are on rise in Brazil Kenneth Weishuhn are, the harder it becomes for some­ Albany. The main focus this year is pas­ thing like this to happen. I want people sage of GENDA, the bill giving anti­ The Daily Beast reports on the surg­ dent from Paullina, Iowa, took his own to be embarrassed to take things out on discrimination protections to transgender ing number of anti-gay murders in Brazil: life after being bullied by classmates at LGBT people, just as embarrassed as New Yorkers. Though the overall crime rate is down South O'Brien school and online, and by they are to use racial slurs. If the law­ There will be a rally, lobbying and sharply in major cities, murders of gays death threats over the phone. yer had said, 'She's dating an African many workshops, including "Building a and lesbians are on the rise. It's especially His sister Kayla said that "friends" at American or a Latino,' that would have Shelter of Peace: Youth Homelessness and acute in the most populous areas: Bahia, his school "turned on him" after he told ended very quickly. But because I was Multi-Faith Organizing"; "Derailing Rac­ Minas Gerais, and the cities of Rio de them he was gay, and boys in her sopho­ dating a woman, this kind of thing was ism: Approaching Social Justice Work as Janeiro and Sao Paulo - precisely where more class started the bullying. admissible. I couldn't believe this was White LGBTQ Activists"; "Going Public: police have made their biggest dents in "She says they took their teases online, happening in New York State in 2003 Uncovering the Media Spokesperson in criminal activity in general. to websites like Facebook, creating a hate through 2009!" You"; "Out of the Closet: Domestic Vio­ Attacks against gays have climbed group against gays and adding Kenneth's Anne talked about her vision for her lence and the LGBT Community"; "Politi­ steadily for most of the last decade, with friends as members," according to KTIY. time as Interim ED. "One of the impor­ cal Engagement & Community Building 272 murdered in 2011 - one every 36 "However, it was only the beginning; tant aspects of the Gay Alliance is, in with New Media" and "Why the Gen­ hours, according to Grupo Gay da Bahia, family say he started receiving death addition to education and advocacy, our der Expression Non-Discrimination Act is a leading gay rights group that tracks anti­ threats from South O'Brien students on community events. We want to maxi­ Important for All of Us" (with transgender gay violence. his phone." mize the reach of events we have to both activist Kate Bornstein). This year, GGB reports, it's even KTIV reported that the school has the LGBT community and straight allies opened an investigation of the "teases." The Pride Agenda will also host cau­ worse, with 75 murders in just the first - but we want to do it efficiently. Process cuses about issues facing LGBT people of 10 weeks. That's one every 24 hours. The GLSEN has said that the Day of Silence and efficiency are important because we was created to save lives, and to honor the color, people of faith, youth, seniors and antigay surge may come as a double sur­ are a small group. We want to maxi­ the PFLAG community. See www.pride­ prise. After all, Brazil is not just famous memory of young people whose voices have mize the programs for the dollars we been silenced forever by the hatred pro­ agenda.org. for its bonhomie, it's also home to one of are given. the best-organized gay rights movements moted by the likes of Mat Staver and the "Education continues to be extremely Liberty Council. • Catholic Charities board anywhere, whose activists pride them­ important as part of our strategic plan," selves in rolling out the biggest Gay Pride Anne said. "We need to make sure we are member resigns after parade in the world. advocating for Gay Alliance programs Dolan letter about youth But success has its price, The Daily too, so people are aware of what's hap­ (Wakeman continuedfrom page 1) Beast notes. As homosexuals have won pening. We have an extraordinary staff A board member of Catholic Chari­ a place for themselves, they also have vinced her that the Gay Alliance plays a and that needs to be emphasized. Part ties has resigned after reading Cardinal become visible targets for bigots. crucial role in the wellbeing of the area's of my job is making sure the commu­ Timothy Dolan's dismissive and arrogant LGBT community, and in protecting nity at large knows about the strength response to Carl Siciliano, head of the Ali gay people from bias and injustice. "The of the staff and how good each of them Forney Center for homeless LGBT youth: Archbishop of Wales: Gay Alliance is needed more than ever," is, as well as looking at programs to Joseph Amodeo quit after Dolan took Welcome gays, accept she says. make sure we're as efficient as possible. umbrage at a letter from a group that marriage equality Anne's role as mother was threatened I want people to understand that in my works with homeless lesbian, bisexual, gay when attorneys attempted to deny her period as Interim ED, the agency will and transgender youths, asking the new Archbishop of Wales Dr. Barry Mor­ custody of her children because she is a continue to move forward. For instance, Cardinal to cease his attacks on gay people gan has called on the Anglican Church to lesbian. our Rainbow SAGE program will have and families. welcome gay people, and accept marriage "For years, my sexuality was a major some exciting announcements in the ''As a gay Catholic who teaches reli­ equality should it pass in the UK. piece of the court proceedings," she said. near future." gious education (more than eight years in In his presidential address to members "It really firmed my resolve that there is Pride is coming soon. Anne said, "In service to the Archdiocese of New York), is of the Church in Wales' Governing Body an ongoing need for the advocacy and terms of participation, Pride can be big­ active in parish life and supports Catholic in Llandudno, North Wales, the arch­ education that the Gay Alliance provides ger and better every year. I see no reason organizations, I'm afraid that the Arch­ bishop called on fellow Anglicans to prove -- just because a law exists doesn't mean why it shouldn't be a big community bishop has caused my heart to ache and that the Gospel of Jesus was "good news" there aren't abuses or that someone won't event that includes the greater Rochester my soul to feel pierced," Amodeo wrote in for gay people. try to take advantage of prejudice and community. I can see Rochester embrac­ his resignation letter. "With a discerning He said: "The Government's consulta­ use gay identity against you." ing the Pride Parade as they do the St. mind, I have tried to overlook the Car­ tion on civil marriage raises a whole host In 2003, the opposing attorney actu­ Patrick's Day Parade. 1'd love it if people dinal's actions and comments, but this of theological questions for the church. ally shouted in court, during an initial all around the Finger Lakes would come has now become impossible in light of his My concern is that in any discussion custody discussion, "Your Honor, she's to Pride. That's a reasonable expectation. curt words to the founder of the nonprofit which might ensue on this, gay people a lesbian!" I don't think Pride should be limited as Ali Forney Center and New York City's may once more gain the impression the Anne said, "In total, I spent six and a far as who is included. We want to be homeless LGBT youth." • church is uncaring and unsympathetic. half years in court." In 2004 the custody inclusive rather than exclusive." • (J oe.My.God.com, April 9) (Archbishop continues page 11)

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"I want youth to realize that they have power they don't even know they have." ,.., Jamie Nabozny

to pay much more attention to the issue. Jamie had not yet seen the new docu­ However, he said, "The media still do not mentary "Bully." Although he was invited pay as much attention to suicides, or to to several premieres, his schedule did not violence against youth of color." permit him to attend. He was planning ~ Jamie feels that the Southern Poverty to attend the Minneapolis premiere later ~ Law Center's Teaching Tolerance pro­ in April, however. He said, "I can't keep Q gram has made allies come forward and up with the speaking requests I get. For ~ made the bullying issue in general much every 50 I get I can do one. I wish I could iil more visible. "I think SPLC has done so do more." He said he especially likes to be ~ much," he said. "When I do speaking invited to speak at small or rural schools. L...;____ ... ~ if engagements, I'm obviously gay and my Jamie and his partner are hoping to story is on the screen, but I'm not talking adopt in a few years. "Right now," he says, about gay rights, but about bullying. I tell ''I'm so busy traveling and it wouldn't be Jamie Nabozny of it shows that they care. kids that bullying will continue to exist fair to my partner to have to be essen­ "Bullied" "I want youth to realize that they have later in life in the form of social injustice tially a single parent. We did get a puppy power they don't even know they have." - the bullies will go on to become right though! That's a start. By Susan Jordan Jamie's case began in 1993, and ended wing politicians or preachers. Bullying is "I have no idea how long I'll be doing Jamie Nabozny grew up in Ashland, a in 1996 when a federal court established just the beginning of lifelong injustice, so this. I thought the interest would die small town in northern Wisconsin. When that youth have the right to be safe in kids need to know they have to continue down a year after my film came out, but he was in middle school he was targeted school. "It was the first time that that standing up against injustice - they will I'm even busier now." He thinks this may for being gay and was bullied for years, was made law," Jamie said. Before the need to stand up both for themselves and be because bullying continues to be so ending with a beating that put him in law, teachers, administrators and school for others." much in the news. hospital and required abdominal surgery. boards could say (as many still do),"Oh, Jamie finds that students want to be Hopefully, the day when this kind Jamie then moved to Minneapolis, Min­ kids will be kids. All kids are cruel. We safe in their schools, and most do not want of behavior is almost unheard of is not nesota. can't protect effeminate boys or mas­ to witness bullying and violence in the too far away. But Jamie Nabozny knows After realizing that many other young culine girls - they should change their halls or bathrooms or on their playgrounds. that progress will be neither quick nor people endured similar bullying, he decid­ behavior instead. It's the gay kids who are "I tell them, if you see bullying, speak up - easy. "We try to make change come more ed to fight back. With the help of Lamb­ the problem, not the bullies." Today such find a teacher or counselor you can talk to quickly, but it will come when it comes. da Legal Defense and Education Fund, attitudes bring unwanted attention from and tell them what is happening." But it WILL come." • Jamie won a history-making lawsuit in the ACLU! federal court that established legally that Jamie feels there have been many all young people, including LG BT youth, changes since 1996, both for the better deserve a safe school experience and an and for worse. On the positive side, Jamie education free of daily physical and emo­ said, "Kids are more connected now and tional torment. don't feel so alone. All I had was a clip­ EXCELLUS BeBS PRESENTS Over a year ago, the Southern Poverty ping from a magazine and through that Law Center (SPLC) produced a documen­ I was able to contact other gay kids. It tary titled "Bullied" that chronicles his was a lifeline for me." He feels that social life. Now Jamie speaks out for the mil­ media and the Internet have enabled gay lions of kids bullied in American schools youth in isolated areas to reach that kind every day. He shares his story nationwide, of lifeline - although social media are also so that no child has to endure what he used by bullies in increasing numbers, endured. Jamie was recently named a especially by girls. Defender of Human Rights by the Rob­ Traditional schoolyard bullying was ert F. Kennedy Center for Justice and more a matter of males physically domi­ Human Rights. nating other males and thus "proving" Jamie lives in Minneapolis with his their "masculinity" - although Jamie feels fiance Bo Shafer. They purchased a home that many bullies and gay-bashers are together and hope to eventually raise a obsessed with gay sex and are in fact gay family. They are planning to marry in themselves. But the quickness, distance Duluth this September. and anonymity of texting, email, Face­ Jamie spoke with the Gay Alliance book, etc., have enabled girls to bully Youth Group on April 5, and attended a other girls much more than before. GEN SILENT screening of "Bullied" in the Youth Cen­ Another major negative change since The generation that fought hardest ter. He also spoke with The Empty Closet 1996 is the backlash factor. "Religious to come out of the closet is going about his experiences as an advocate for organizations, the media and politicians back in ... to survive. LGBT youth, about what has and has not are putting out more negativity than changed in schools, and his advice for the ever," Jamie said. "The environment creat­ youth he talks with. ed by dehumanizing GLBT youth makes Tuesday, June 19 Referring to his many speaking it harder to reach bullies who are hearing 5:45pm: Special Recepti on engagements, Jamie said, "My two busiest this input from their parents, churches, and Tour of the JCC exhibit: months are April and October - probably even some teachers. Kids targeted years Nazi Persecution of Homosexuals 1933-1945 because of Coming Out Day and the Day ago for not fitting gender stereotypes of Silence. About 60 percent of my speak­ would be targeted now both for that and 7:00pm: Film screening of Gen Silent ing engagements are at middle and high for being gay." schools, about 30 percent colleges, and 10 Last year Jamie was named a Defend­ Jewish Community Center percent trainings, conferences, and other er of Human Rights by the Robert F. presentations not associated with schools. Kennedy Center for Justice and Human 1200 Edgewood Drive, Rochester, New York 15618 I try to meet with GLBT youth because Rights. He says, "I found out about it Free and Open to the Public. For accommodations call (585) 244-8640 I want to empower them and let them after it happened - I was being introduced know that they have power now - they (at a speaking engagement) and in my Sponsored by the Gay Alliance w ith generous support from Excellus BCBS don't have to wait." introduction they announced that I had When asked how he feels about the "It won this award - which I had never heard Gets Better" videos, Jamie said, "I have about! And then I had to go ahead and Rainbow Seniors: Improving the Quality of mixed feelings. It's good to give them give my speech. I did get invited to the big Services and Support for LGST Older Adults '@' hope for the future, but I haven't made a gala in NYC in early December." 1:30-5:30pm video because I feel my role is working to He said, "To me, this (award) elevates Workshop for elder care professionals to learn the II GaXf~!!!~n.~e culture, needs, and concerns of LGBT older adults. make it better NOW. The hard part is, the issue of student safety to the level of $50 pre-registration required. Visi t www.gayall iance.org there are kids for whom it won't get bet­ human rights." He feels that at least since to register or call 585-244-8640. Held at the JCC. ter. It's good that President Obama and the epidemic of youth suicides in fall Excellus '" celebrities are doing this, though, because 2010, the mainstream media have started 8 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

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DOS: Scenes from the Day of Silence at Tilt, April 20. Photos: Jeff Mills

My Own Private Rochester: Dontaee Williamson By Susan Jordan Dontaee Williamson, 18, has been a GAGV Youth Group member for sev­ eral years, and has helped to organize the Day of Silence, Youth Pride activities and many other projects. He is a GLSEN team leader and last year was part of a group of youth leaders who went to the White House and met with President Obama. Dontaee is a senior at School of the Arts (SOTA), majoring in theatre and dance. He was born in Middletown, Ct., and moved to Rochester with his family at age 6. As he got older and entered middle school and then high school, he says, "I definitely got bullied for being gay, from Dontaee meets President Obama at the around the 8th grade. I didn't talk to any­ White House. one about it. I found out about the Gay Alliance Youth Group three years ago. by Youth Group members Desiree and "I led a closeted life. I had clothes I Dontaee at Village Gate. Photos: Susan Jordan Jackie - but anyone can join. Our show changed into after school- I would come lasts about an hour and a half, and we're to the GAGV and change. Everything like Drop In, Day of Silence and Youth takes you out, spends time with you and is doing it again this month." there was nice, people were nice. Right Group Student Council. He said, "I went just there for you when you want to talk." His favorite LG BT events include the away I knew that. I made friends and to GLSEN camp in NYC - me and Jess Dontaee likes to hang out at Day of Silence, which he helped to orga­ shared my story and beliefs." (Cohen, Youth Services Director) went. Equal=Grounds. "I love it there," he said, nize again this year. "I like to see all the Dontaee became a GLSEN member "because it's in the South Wedge, which youth coming together and being who in 2010. Last year he became one of the Then we went a few months later to the White House and met the President. It is beautiful, and it's gay-friendly. You get they are and getting along," he said. Some student team leaders. He became involved to meet people and make connections, other Rochester favorites are the Lilac Fes­ with organizing Youth Group activities was a dream come true - working with Jess and shaking hands with the President. which is important." tival and the Pride Parade, Festival and Dontaee loves sushi, and his favorite "I asked him to keep supporting LGBT Picnic. He helps with planning the Youth restaurant is California Rollin' at Village students, and he said, 'No problem, that's Picnic, which takes place during the Pride Gate, which he enjoys for all the shops my job.' We shook hands and we hugged." Picnic in Genesee Valley Park. - especially Outlandish. He loves Garth Dontaee is biking in June's Ride for This year Dontaee and Jess attend­ Fagan Dance and RAPA and has taken Pride again this year. He also enjoys run­ ed the National Gay and Lesbian Task dance lessons from both. "I love Push ning and playing volleyball. After gradu­ Force Creating Change conference in Bal­ Physical Theatre and danced with them ation he wants to major in social work timore, representing GLSEN. Dontaee on Easter Sunday. We're family friends and communication at MCC, and plans said, "The Creating Change conference with the Stephenson family that runs it," to continue with dance. He will take next was about just that - and about changing he said. fall off to work and travel, and will start yourself as well as society." He also loves Geva and especially at MCC in January 2013. Over the sum­ He and Jess went back to Baltimore in enjoys musicals there, at Downstairs Cab­ mer he will visit family in Georgia and late April, to attend GLSEN's Students of aret and at RBTL's Auditorium Theatre. friends in Ohio. Color conference. He was selected as one "My favorite musical is 'West Side Story,'" However, he says nothing can match of the two top student leaders of the year. he reveals. Movies are another favorite and his experience last summer, when he went Dontaee is also in the local mentor pro­ he recently loved "Pariah." with a group from SOTA to the acclaimed gram for Lifespan, undergoing the training Dontaee's favorite Rochester group is Edinburgh Festival in Scotland. They process that will move him from "men­ of course the Gay Alliance Youth Group, performed "New York," a series of mono­ tee" to mentor, able to help and support especially the Teen Group which meets on logues about 9/11 which have been put younger youth. He said, "When you are a Tuesdays, 6-7:30 p.m. He adds, "I love my together to create a play. "I played the 'mentee' you are paired with an adult who Rocky Horror group, which was founded Firefighter," he said . • MAY 2012 • NUMBER 456 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY. THE EMPTY CLOSET 11

KATE THE GREAT: Kate Clinton schmoozes with Rochestarians before her April performance marking ImageOut's 20th anniversary. Top left: Kate with Michael Gamilla. Top center: Kate with Gerry Szymanski. Photos: Garnetta Ely

May 4-6 with a lineup of events geared To learn more about the National Gay port for Jennifer's campaign at the 23rd NATIONAL AND toward LGBT people and their families. and Lesbian Task Force, visit www.the­ Annual GLAAD Media Awards this past INTERNATIONAL The weekend kicks off with the Pink TaskForce.org and follow on Twitter: @ weekend. & Purple Sunset: a Women's Event, on TheTaskForce. "The Boy Scouts are supposed to have (Archbishop continuedfrom page 6) Friday, May 4 from 5:30-10 p.m. This a platform of tolerance, acceptance, and "If the legislation to allow civil mar­ event will be held on the rooftop deck of Cub Scouts dismiss support -- values that drew my son Cruz to be a scout, and that drew me to want riage is passed, I cannot see how we as a the Capitol Hill Liaison Hotel and will lesbian den mother; she church will be able to ignore the legality feature DJ Whitney Day, who has played to be a den leader," said Tyrrell. "Yet by of the status of such partnerships and we for the Task Force's Winter Party Festival. starts online petition continuing to dismiss gay youth and gay The night also includes hors d'oeuvres, leaders from their organization, the Boy ought not to want to do so. More than 115,000 people have signed "The question is, will the church pro­ drink specials, raffles and giveaways. Scouts of America is failing these values, Immediately following the Sunset a petition on Change.org started by Jen­ harming families and communities by tect and support pastorally faithful, stable, nifer Tyrrell, a mother of a seven-year-old event, Cobalt will be hosting the Pink sending a message that all are not wel­ lifelong relationships of whatever kind in Cub Scout who was dismissed from her & Purple Party. A new addition to the come." order to encourage human values such as position of den leader by the Boy Scouts lineup, this themed dance party will fea­ Bob Drury, a scout executive for the love and fidelity? Things could be said in of America for being gay. ture the sounds of Los Angeles-based DJ Ohio River Valley, attempted to defend the coming months which I think could Jennifer was removed from the posi­ Paulo. All guests will be encouraged to the decision to discriminate to WTOV­ seriously damage people pastorally." tion in March 2012 after nearly a year dress up in pink and purple. If they do, TV. "We do not grant membership to "Rev. Andrew Morton, vicar of Lla­ of exemplary service, during which her they will be entered to win two gold pass­ individuals who are open or avow homo­ ngybi, Monmouthshire, who recently scouts were honored for their commit­ es to the 2013 Winter Party Festival. sexuals," said Drury. "The mission of the announced his intention to resign in an ment to volunteerism, leadership, and The weekend culminates with the Boy Scouts of America is to develop a effort to move forward efforts to secure community service. Pink & Purple Recognition Awards, tak­ character and leadership skills and [for] the full inclusion of gays and lesbians in Video of Tyrrell, her partner Alicia ing place at the Mayflower Hotel on the youth of today to become the leaders the church," responded to Wales Online Burns and their four children sharing their Sunday, May 6, from 10:30 a.m.-2 p.m. of tomorrow. And anything that distracts that it is clear there were same-sex unions story at the GLAAD Media Awards is This annual event honors leaders and from that mission, distracts from what that were "as full of grace as many hetero­ available here: http://www.youtube.com/ allies who are at the forefront of push­ our program is." WTOV-TV reported sexual relationships." watch?v=7WuqLJtoXyY. Her petition is ing equality forward. Ingrid Duran and that the decision was "solely based on her Predicting some disquiet in the available at http://change.org/scouts. Catherine Pino will be honored not only sexual orientation." denomination as a result of the speech, he Jennifer's petition urges the Boy for their work on LGBT issues, but across Tyrrell responded: "Boy Scouts is said: "I don't think he will gain universal Scouts of America to end their long-held a multitude of issues, including women's about teaching kids to be better adults. approval and I think there are some peo­ policy that forbids lesbian, gay bisexual and Latino/a issues. NGLTF will also be We're not doing that by teaching them ple who will be aghast [who] will think and transgender (LGBT) youth and gay presenting an award to Dee Rees and the to hate or discriminate. They know that he's sold out to political correctness which LGBT leaders from participating in scout­ filmmakers of "Pariah" for its accurate I care about them, that I lead them and is a nonsense. Anybody who knows Barry ing. Her petition has drawn support from portrayal of the sensitive issues surround­ that they can trust me. This is about par­ knows he couldn't give a monkey's about more than 115,000 Americans, includ­ ing the complex identity among families ents being able to bond with their chil­ political correctness." ing hundreds of current boy scouts, scout and individuals of color. dren. The Boy Scouts of America have Instead, Mr. Morton said, the arch­ leaders, and former scouts. Celebrities Sponsors and hosts are Sanford and denied me the ability to bond with my bishop's priority was identifying "truth". including Josh Hutcherson, Jesse Tyler Doris Slavin Foundation, David M. Perez Ferguson, Max Adler (Glee), Grant Gus­ son and are teaching children to treat oth­ Read more: http://www.towleroad. and Ruben J. Gonzales, Miguel Ayala, tin (Glee), Benicio del Toro, Chaz Bono, ers unfairly." com/#ixzz1s0kHeG5l Russell Roybal, Anabel Evora. National Tabatha Coffey, Mark Deklin (GCB), Among service organizations, the Boy Gay and Lesbian Task Force National Trevor Donovon (90210), Laura san Scouts are increasingly isolating them­ NGLTF Awards Weekend Corporate Partners: American Airlines, Giacomo, LZ Granderson, Joshua J ack­ selves with their prohibition on gay youth is May 4·6 in D.C. Brinker International, Grey Goose, Show­ son, Gilles Marini, Kyle Richards (Real and leaders. Organizations including the time, Wells Fargo. Housewives of Beverly Hills), Miriam Girl Scouts of America, the Boys & Girls The National Gay and Lesbian Task Sponsorships, tickets and hosting Shor (GCB), Hudson Taylor, Lisa Vander­ Clubs of America, as well as the 4H Club Force's annual Washington, D.C., event, opportunities are all available online at Pump (Real Housewives of Beverly Hills), all welcome gay kids as well as adult lead- Pink & Purple Weekend, is returning www.theTaskForce.org/pinkandpurple. and Kim Wayans (Pariah) showed sup- (Cub Scouts continues page 14) 12 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY. NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

New bookcases transform Gay Alliance Library The scene was bustling at the GAGV Library & Archives on Saturday, April 14. Twenty-nine volunteers transformed the library over the course of the morning, installing twelve new bookcases and label­ ing thousands of books. The event happened thanks to fund­ Lake Avenue ing from the Xerox Community Involve­ ment Program (XCIP), secured by library Baptist Church volunteer and Xerox employee Jeff Fowler. XCIP enables service projects with lasting impact that involve Xerox employees as An LGBT volunteers and benefit non-profit organi­ zations like the Gay Alliance. Affirming Before the project, most of the books in the Library & Archives were shelved in Church donated or "economy" bookcases. These bookcases were built for home use, not LIBRARY TRANSFORMATION: On April 14, the Gay Alliance Library got its new book­ the kind of heavy use subjected by a shelves, through funding from Xerox. Now volunteers will be able to replace the community library. New bookcases were Dewey decimal system with Library of Congress numbers, so that the Library can get Invites You! needed not only to improve the mechan­ a standardized online catalogue. Above: Volunteers re-shelving fiction books during ics of browsing the collection, but also for the transformation: (L-R) Chris Fisher, Bob Keck, Bruce Woolley, Jeff Freeland, Nick 10:00 AM: safety and the preservation of the books Dennie, Eric Rodriguez, Richard Collier-Morris. Photo: Gerry Szymanski Sunday morning worship service themselves. With considerable help from generous designated gifts, the GAGV has and Tara Winner, twenty-nine volunteers matter. The new labels represent another been replacing the old shelves with sturdy worked for about four hours. Volunteers milestone for the library, making the col­ 11 :15 AM: A Time for Fellowship hardwood bookcases that will hold up were split roughly equally among regular lection easier to browse and easier to keep long-term. The problem was that budgets library staff volunteers, Xerox employees, organized. 11 :30 am: Adult Education didn't allow replacing all of the old book­ other professionals from Out & Equal In just a few hours, all of the old book­ cases before they literally fell apart. NY Finger Lakes, and other friends and cases were removed, new bookcases were With the project funded by the Xerox partners. installed and thousands of books were Childcare & Sunday School for Community Involvement Program, the Some volunteers set up tables, moved labeled and organized. The library was children are available. GAGV was able to get ahead of the library furniture, and prepared and reassembled by 12:30 p.m., ready for reg­ problem. Not only did the XCIP fund a installed the new shelves. Another crew ular operations. library full of bookcases, but the volun­ moved shelves and shelves of books onto Thanks to the Xerox Community Lake Avenue Baptist teers installed them all in one morning. tables in the foyer, keeping careful watch Involvement Program, all of the dedicated The concentrated effort prevented the to keep them in order. library volunteer staff, the GAGV agency Church is located just off Lake library from having to suspend its regular Other volunteers worked on adding and all the friends who supported this Avenue near the stop light at 145 Lake operations for several weeks to install the new call number labels to the fiction, fic­ transformational project. The transfor­ Avenue. new bookcases. With the new bookcases, tion anthology, DVD, CD, journal, biog­ mation was effected without interruption the library finally boasts a consistent col­ raphy, poetry, young adult and children's to regular operating hours. Everyone is www.lakeavebaptist.org lection of shelving, with enough space for sections. Still others started the process of encouraged to stop by to see the tremen­ years to come. converting the non-fiction section from dous progress! The library is open Mon­ www.facebook.com/pages/Lake Coordinated by library staff vol­ Dewey Decimal to Library of Congress day and Wednesday evenings from 6 to -Ave-Baptist-Church unteers Gerry Szymanski, Jeff Fowler, classification to better divide the subject 8p.m . •

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who has been a champion of this legis­ released a report that documents key com­ duct specifically prohibiting bullying and NATIONAL AND lation, said, 'Today is a day that I have ponents of anti-bullying laws across all 50 harassment, including on the basis of race, INTERNATIONAL hoped for since I began my work as an states. And the Department of Educa­ color, national origin, sex, disability, sexual anti-bullying advocate after losing my tion has issued guidance to Governors and orientation, gender identity, and religion. (Cub Scouts continued from page 11) son Carl. I believe that President Obama's state school officials, in order to help them I would also like to thank Illinois ers. And just this month, the president of explicit endorsement of the Safe Schools incorporate the best practices for protect­ Representative Danny Davis for his advo­ the James Beard Foundation announced Improvement Act will make a tremendous ing students. cacy on this issue. All of our students that she would rescind her acceptance of difference in moving this issue forward.'" We recently re-launched StopBully­ have the same right to go to school in an the Boy Scouts' Distinguished Citizen Sirdeaner added, "Having met with the ing.gov, a website that contains detailed environment free of discrimination and Award, noting the Scouts' policy prohibit­ President three times, I knew his support descriptions of the work we're doing on harassment, and that's why the President ing gay people from service and leadership. for SSIA and the Student Non-Discrim­ bullying, along with resources for young supports these two important pieces ofleg­ "The tide is turning. Look at the num­ ination Act was genuine. While nothing people, parents, and educators. islation and wants to work with Congress ber of current and former scouts signing can bring Carl back, I know that these We've partnered with businesses, foun­ as they move forward in the process this petition, as well as the overwhelming bills can make a real difference to end the dations, non-profits, and universities that Every day, we are striving to do our support I've received in my own commu­ bullying and harassment that is faced by are coming up with new, creative ways to part to make progress. And I believe that nity from the scouts and families I used too many other sons and daughters today." make our schools safe. day by day, step by step, we will change to lead," said Tyrrell. "Together we can be Valerie Jarrett, Senior Advisor to Presi­ And recently, the Departments of Edu­ not just our laws and policies, but behav­ heard, and this movement can send a mes­ dent Barack Obama, released the follow­ cation and Justice reached a landmark ior, so that every young person is able to sage to the Boy Scouts that their policies ing statement: settlement in the Anoka-Hennepin School thrive in our schools and communities, against gay youth and gay leaders create Recently, I watched the movie BULLY District after an extensive investigation without worrying about being bullied. nothing but division, frustration, and pain with my mom. We were both deeply into bullying and harassment against stu­ for scouting families and communities." moved by the film and the stories it tells dents who are or are perceived to be HRC says Republican Live signature totals from Jennifer Tyr­ of students, families, and communities LGBT. rell's campaign: impacted by bullying. These Administrative actions have candidate opposes anti· http://www.change.org/scouts Earlier today, we screened BULLY at been critically important - and effective bullying law Jennifer's speech at the GLAAD Media the White House. We were joined by bul­ - and we will continue to work across the Awards in Los Angeles: lying prevention advocates from a range entire Federal government to address and The Human Rights Campaign is call­ http://www.youtube.com/ of communities - LGBT, AAPI, faith, prevent bullying. ing out New Mexico U.S. Senate candi­ watch?v=7WuqLJtoXyY disability, and others - as well as educa­ We also hope that Congress will take date Heather Wilson for remarks in which tional partners and key Obama Admin­ action to ensure that all students are safe she actually blasts legislation meant to pro­ tect children because it supposedly "crimi­ White House backs Safe istration staff who work on these issues and healthy and can learn in environments every day, including Secretary of Education free from discrimination, bullying, and nalizes" what she refers to as "teasing." Schools Improvement Act Arne Duncan. Before the film, a panel of harassment by passing the Student Non­ In video captured by the group Ameri­ nationally recognized experts on bullying Discrimination Act (SNDA) and the Safe can Bridge, Wilson says of the Student On GLSEN's 17th annual Day of Schools Improvement Act (SSIA). These Non-Discrimination Act (SNDA): "... but Silence, the White House released a state­ prevention spoke from their perspectives pieces of legislation are critically impor­ that particular act is so broad that it would ment of support endorsing the Safe Schools about challenges and opportunities, and after the film, we heard from Lee Hirsch, tant to addressing bullying in our schools actually punish children, or say it's prohib­ Improvement Act (SSIA) and the Student and safeguarding our most vulnerable stu­ ited to express an opinion with respect to Non-Discrimination Act (SNDA). the director and filmmaker, and several of dents. The Student Non-Discrimination homosexuality in schools." U.S. Education Secretary Arne Dun­ the students and families who were directly impacted by bullying and intolerance and Act, sponsored by Senator Al Franken of "Heather Wilson's remarks are shock­ can commented on the Student Non­ Minnesota, and Representative Jared Polis ingly ignorant and show how unaware she Discrimination Act And The Safe Schools whose stories were featured in the film. This film is a powerful call to action: of Colorado, would prohibit discrimina­ is of the realities kids face in school on a Improvement Act, "Bullying can no longer tion in public schools against any student daily basis," said HRC President Joe Sol­ be seen as a normal rite of passage. As a We must do everything we can to work toward the day when no young person or on the basis of actual or perceived sexual monese. "Bullying and harassment of kids country, we must all work together to take orientation and gender identity. who are LGBT, or who are perceived to be action against bullying and improve the family suffers the pain, agony, and loss caused by bulling in our schools and com­ And the Safe Schools Improvement LGBT, is a serious problem. Our lawmak­ safety climates of our schools and com­ Act, sponsored by Senator Bob Casey of ers have a moral obligation to protect chil­ munities. That's why I support the Stu­ munities. In the last few years, President Obama Pennsylvania and Representative Linda dren. Heather Wilson should be sending dent N on-Discrimination Act and the Safe Sanchez of California, would require a message that verbal and physical abuse Schools Improvement Act. I would like to and his Administration have taken signifi­ school districts to adopt codes of con- is never acceptable behavior. Instead, she's thank Sen. Al Franken, Sen. Bob Casey, cant steps towards this goal. Rep. Jared Polis and Rep. Linda Sanchez In March of 2010, we held the first­ for introducing these bills and for their ever White House Conference on Bullying commitment to putting an end to bully­ Prevention, attended by both the President ing, discrimination and harassment in our and First Lady. The conference brought nation's schools. I also want to thank Rep. together students, teachers, advocates, the Danny Davis for his leadership on this private sector, and policymakers, to discuss issue to help keep every student safe and ways to make our schools safer. President NO SHRT learning." Obama explained it this way: "If there's GLSEN commented, "To day's one goal of this conference, it's to dispel announcement is a vital show of support to the myth that bullying is just a harm­ students everywhere of all identities, back­ less rite of passage or an inevitable part of S[£ASON S grounds and beliefs who face daily bully­ growing up. It's not." ing and harassment in school. By speaking The President recorded a video for the out on GLSEN's Day of Silence in support It Gets Better Project, and so did the Vice of these two critical pieces of legislation, President, Cabinet Secretaries, and mem­ President Obama has given greater hope bers of the White House Staff. ~OMNG! to students who often feel that they have The Department of Education has nowhere to turn issued guidance to schools, colleges, and "It is deeply moving to know that universities, making it clear that existing LGBT students who face the multiple civil rights laws apply to bullying. Schools threats of discrimination, harassment and have not just a moral responsibility, but a violence have the President as an ally in legal responsibility, to protect our young their efforts to win all of the protections people from harassment. They have also that they deserve. worked with states to help them in their "Our good friend Sirdeaner Walker, own anti-bullying efforts, and recently

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Exhibit on Nazi beneficiary agencies locally and social and cuted and after the war humanitarian programs and services in continued to hide their persecution of gays Israel and around the world. Chai means Jewish identity, so I opens at JCC on May 24 "life." wouldn't be surprised if Bonnie Abrams, the child of Holo­ gay survivors still exist By Susan Jordan caust survivors, works with local survi­ who have always been The Jewish Community Center (JCC) vors and educates in schools, from middle closeted." will host the opening of "Nazi Persecution schools to colleges. She commented, "I of Homosexuals 1933-1945" on May 24. She told The Empty see kids using swastikas This important traveling exhibit of Closet, "To me as and they have no idea photographs and historical artifacts comes a Holocaust edu­ what it means. They from the u.s. Holocaust Memorial Muse­ cator, it's logical to just know it's some­ um in Washington D.C. partner any exhib­ thing that adults are The opening at the JCC, 1200 Edge­ it about any per­ upset by. That's why wood Ave., will include a talk by Rabbi secuted peoples. I I like to educate kids David Horowitz, national PFLAG presi­ always like to help about what the Nazis dent, on "How to be a straight ally." The is life chang­ people understand did. This An archival photo. Rochester Gay Men's Chorus will sing Bonnie Abrams that though the ing for many kids who and there will be a dessert reception. See Jews were the pri­ just weren't aware. The most important toward immigrants," she said. "It's iron­ this page for a full, updated list of events mary targets of the Nazis, many other thing I do is bring Holocaust survivors ic that you can go through every era of related to the exhibit, which will run groups were also persecuted." to speak at schools, and to community immigration -- people came here to seek through July 19. To the generation that grew up after groups, churches etc. They hear the survi­ their own freedom and then they want to Ralph Meranto of the J CC told The World War II, the Nazis represent the ulti­ vors talk and realize this isn't just a story deny that to the next group. The Torah Empty Closet, "The Jewish Community mate in human evil. But Bonnie Abrams - it's real, and it affects them. It's very eye­ says, 'You shall neither wrong a stranger, Center of Greater Rochester has truly feels that many young people today have opening for them, even to the point where nor oppress him; for you were strangers in embraced the word 'community' in our little information about this history and they can relate it to their own lives." the land of Egypt.' It's something we read title. We have a long tradition of inclu­ do not understand what the Nazis did. Abrams mentioned the book "Survival in the Haggadah during Passover." siveness and welcoming people from all She noted, ''A Holocaust survivor said to in the Shadows," by Barbara Lovenheim. Abrams went on, "From a personal communities. This exhibition continues me, 'If the Holocaust hadn't happened, It is a CHAI publication which tells the standpoint, it's a wonderful exhibit for our ongoing commitment to the LGBT no one would ever believe that it could be story of two local survivors, the late Ellen our community. Generally speaking, we community, which has included partner­ anything but fiction.'" and Erich Arndt, and how they were have good gay/straight relations here in ships between the Rochester Jewish Film She said, "I look for any opportunity among the largest group of Jewish sur­ Rochester, so this is likely to get support Festival and Image Out and hosting an to educate people about how something vivors to successfully hide in Berlin itself from people here. It's great that there are Out and Equal networking event, as well that may start as a prejudiced attitude until the end of the war. She said, "They so many community partners of different as Gay Alliance fundraisers during our could end in violence. A lot of people who credited their survival to over 50 ordinary faiths and backgrounds, as we will see at CenterStage Theatre productions of Rent, come to the exhibit may already be sup­ German citizens. It's hard to imagine the panel of faith leaders." The Producers and My Mother's Lesbian portive, but I hope that a lot of young that so many Germans were' helpers' and Some of the events which will take Jewish Wiccan Wedding. We could not be people will see it and it will reach them saved Jewish lives, when that could have place in the next two months are not more proud of the massive community before they become bigoted - and I hope cost their own lives and those of their directly related to the Nazis. For instance, support for these efforts which has made it will open some minds. That is why families." the film "Two Spirits" is about a transge­ this exhibition possible." we are having an interschool program She points out that the United States nered Navajo youth who was murdered, The EC also spoke with Bonnie in conjunction with the exhibit on May was not exactly eager at first to help Jew­ and "Gen Silent" is about gay elders. Abrams of CHAI (Center for Holocaust 30, called 'Learning from the Holocaust: ish refugees, as in the notorious case of "That's what I think is so powerful," Awareness and Information), which is Challenging Persecution of The Other.'" the ship St. Louis, which was turned away Abrams said. ''As a child of Holocaust part of the Jewish Federation of Roch­ Abrams was unable to locate any area from Cuba and from safety in the U.S. in survivors, everything in my life has been ester, and a community partner in the survivors who had observed Nazi oppres­ 1939 and had to return to Europe, where connected to the Holocaust, but I feel exhibition. The Federation is the central sion of gays during or before the war. As many of its passengers had to remain in we need to draw lessons in contemporary planning, fund raising and community far as is known, the last gay survivor died countries that were soon overrun by the society from this unspeakable chapter in relations organization for the Rochester last year (see April Empty Closet). She said, Nazis. "To me, that's a very powerful story history. Kids need to understand 'what Jewish community, which supports five "Just as there were Jews who were perse- about our own country and its attitude this has to do with me.'" •

PROGRAM AND EVENTS Weds. May 23: Pre-Exhibition Supper and Learn with Rabbi David Horowitz. How to support LGBTQ family members and friends. RSVP by May 19. Thurs. May 24; Opening Night Celebration, 7 p.m. Presentation by Rabbi David Horowitz, president of national PFLAG. Rochester Gay Men's Chorus, reception. Free admission. RSVP. Wednesday, May 30: Lunch and Learn with Edward Phillips, Director of Museums, U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum, curator of exhibition. Free event. Thursday May 31: Watch & Discuss: an exhibition-related film series. Free screenings, discussions in JCC Senior Adult Lounge. 7 p.m. "Hineini": a PROGRAM HIGHLIGHTS teenage girl comes out in a Jewish high school. May 24 Opening Night Thursday June 7: Watch & Discuss: Regional Premiere of "Love Free or Die," about Bishop Gene Robinson. JCC Senior Adult Lounge. 7 p.m. Presented by Rabbi David Horowitz, President of PFLAG Discussion moderated by Rev. Michael Hopkins, Sponsored by Oasis How to be a Ilstraight ally" Rochester, LGBT ministry of Episcopal Diocese of Rochester. Performance by the Rochester Gay Men's Chorus Sunday, June 10: CenterStage Reader Theatre Series: "Bent" by Martin Dessert reception Sherman. Play about Nazi persecution of gay men. Script-in-hand readings in JCC Hart Theatre, 7 pm. Free, no reservations required. June 14 Tuesday, June 12: VisitRochester Hospitality U: The LGBT Market, with Panel Discussion: LGBTQ and Religion David Paisley from Community Marketing Inc. (San Francisco). VisitRochester The Struggle for Inclusiveness members: $20. Non-members: $40. RSVP: for this event only call 585-279-8300. June 19 Thursday, June 14: Panel Discussion: LGBTQ and Religion: The Struggle Reception and Special Film Presentation: for Inclusiveness. Moderator: John Clinton Bradley, Episcopal Diocese. Free. Tuesday, June 19: Watch & Discuss: Reception and Film: Excellus Gen Silent (Sponsored by the Gay Alliance of Genesee Valley) presents "Gen Silent". Sponsored by Gay Alliance. Free event. JCC Senior Adult June 21 Lounge. 7 p.m. Film Series: Two Spirits (a partner Thursday June 21: Watch & Discuss: "Two Spirits." Film on the life and program with WXXI) untimely death of transgender Navajo teen Fred Martinez. A partner program with WXXI. Free event. JCC Senior Adult Lounge. 7 p.m. July 19 Sunday June 24: CenterStage Reader Theatre Series: "No Word in Closing Night Celebration Guyanese for Me," by Wendy Graf. New play about average American teenager Join Alan van Capelle, long-time political who is also a Muslim lesbian from Guyana in post-9/11 Queens, NY. Script-in­ activist and advocator for LGBTQ rights, and hand readings in JCC Hart Theatre, 7 pm. current president and CEO of the Progressive Thursday June 28: Watch & Discuss: "A Love to Hide." Film about Jewish Alliance and Jewish Funds for Justice. young gay couple and Jewish friend in WWII France. Discussion moderated by Professor Charles Clarke, MCC. Free event. JCC Senior Adult Lounge. 7 p.m. Sunday July 1: CenterStage Reader Theatre Series: "The Zero Hour" by Madeline George. Lesbian relationship starts to unravel as one woman hides her ~:~~YH~AUST sexuality. JCC Hart Theatre, 7 pm. '~USEUM July 19: Closing Night. Presentation by Alan van Capelle, LGBT activist and president /CEO of Progressive Jewish Alliance/Jewish Funds for Justice. 7 p.m., free. RSVP. Exhibition closes July 22. 18 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012 A NERP 2012 Very Special Thanks to everyone who mad North East Regional I ("NERP") Conference a success ... Healthy Prides

Partners & Sponsors: VisitRochester, Airigami Productions, Tilt Nightclub, Special thanks to everyone that made Radisson Riverside Hotel Staff, CMI AV, Logo Dogz, our 3rd Annual, "March into Pride, Monte Barefoot Wines & Bubbly, ID Lube, Casswood Insurance, Carlo Style!" at 140 Alex on Sunday, March Spectrum Talent Agency, Community Marketing Inc., 25 a sensational event and fundraiser for Premier Pastry, Hedonist Chocolate and AIDS Cares Rochester PRIDE 2012! Club/Mug/Pub Crawl Sponsors: The Gals at 140 Alex VisitRochester.com, Tilt Night Club, Rochester Shuttle thanks for helping keep a fun tradition going and The Express, 140 Alex, Bachelor Forum, Boulder Coffee and Pizza! One Night Club

The Dealers Performers & Entertainment: especially Bill and Dawn, AJ and Michael: friendly and Jessica Sutta (and her manager, Andre Recke), Dykes of professional gaming! Hazard, DJ Chuck Argento, Method Machine, Rochester Gay Men's Chorus and John Williams DJ Len Super music to set the mood! Volunteers: Michael Hardy, Eric Rodriguez, Joe Murphy, Carrie Volunteers Vernon, Evelyn Bailey, Dustin Hilton, Jo Meleca-Voigt, Carrie, Joe and Tatiana: Alysa Stryker, Tatiana Clader, Sue Cowell and time and talents! Christina Miller

JCC Center Stage, Method Machine, Mike Kelly LMT, Especially to our Speakers: Bread & Water Theatre, ID LUBE, Holiday Inn Airport, Dresden Engle-Olcott, Margaret Reichert, Alyssa Vaisey, Barefoot Wines & Bubbly, Boulder Coffee, Equal Christopher Hildibrandt, Leanne Reed, Scott Fearing, Grounds, VisitRochester, Woodcliff: We appreciate the Marc Katz, Jeannie Gainsberg, Bill Gormont, Billy Urlich, great prizes you donated and so did the WINNERS! Harry Bronson, Carrie Vernon and Michael Hardy

And especially to our 60 or so "high rollers" And much thanks to our 17 visiting Pride who came and had fun at the roulette, craps Organizations that attended from our great and blackjack tables: YOU helped us raise state: Albany, NYC, Brooklyn, Queens, Long over $600 for Rochester PRIDE 2012! Island and Syracuse as well as Atlanta, Boston, CT, Cape Cod, Delaware, NJ, New Hope, THANK YOU ALL! Ottawa, Pittsburgh, RI and Western Mass.!

GOOD LUCK ALWAYS! Much gratitude and success are wished to all!

Q: What do you get when 140 Alex Bar a Grill and Rochester Pride come together? A: A Party in the The Committee for Rochester PRIDE 2012 is happy to announce our 140 Alex Parking Lot! Headquarter Hotel: The Holiday Inn Airport, Join us for the first time ever 911 Brooks Ave., Rochester, NY 14624. 140 The Holiday Inn Airport is offering a $99 per night rate! Parking Lot Party Call 585-328-6000 to make reservations. They have a huge indoor pool, June 9, Z-8pm great gym, awesome Italian restaurant and one of the most popular bars on Watch for announcements on the south side of the city! Visit www.hirochesterairport.com and www.YisitRochester.com and stay a couple days with us! the exciting details of this fabulous party! MAY 2012 • NUMBER 456 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET 19

PRIDE EVENTS (See June Pride supplement for Grand Marshal and Honorary Grand Marshal, updated list of events; also check www.rochesterpride.com) July 2012 Thursday July 5: Gay Alliance event at JCC in conjunction with the U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum exhibit Friday July 6: City Hall Rainbow flag-raising, 4-5pm, followed by Super Sassy in the South Wedge Sunday July 8: Tea Dance (4-8pm, location TBA) Monday July 9: Youth Pride Pageant 6-9pm (location TBA) Tuesday July 10: Third Presbyterian Film Night (TBA) Wednesday July 11: The Good, The Bad and the Funny Transgender Event, at Equal=Grounds (time TBA) Thursday July 12: Out &Equal Happy Hour (time, location TBA) ImageOut film (TBA) Friday July 13: Pride Kick Off Party, Holiday Inn Airport 7-10 pm Saturday July 14: Family Event, Museum &Science Center (tentative) Pride Parade line up 2:30-3:30pm; Parade step-off 3:30pm Festival, Auditorium parking lot, College St. (between Goodman & Prince) 4:30-9:30pm Sunday July 15: Pride Picnic, Genesee Valley Park, 1-7pm

A message from Carrie Vernon Why Pride? I have been thinking about this question and I have asked people in the Roches­ BEASUPERHERO ter community this question. The responses I received made it very clear that Pride is still needed and we contin­ The Gay Alliance Seeks ue to have Pride here in Rochester to bring the community together to celebrate who Pride Volunteers each of us are individually, to celebrate the diversity within our own LGBT Rochester community, and to end bias and discrimination against the LGBT community. If you can help out with two hours of Pride is a celebration and lots of fun, but there are important reasons why we volunteering at any Pride event, please go to need to have Pride in Rochester. The Rochester Pride Committee supports and rec­ www.gayalliance.org/pride/volunteer ognizes the importance of each and everyone of you. 50 together we will have a Fill out the form. great 10 days of Pride and we can't wait to see you! That's all there is to it! Thank you. Thanks, Carrie Vernon, Chair ofRochester Pride

P.5. Everything you need to know to participate in all the events and get involved with Rochester Pride can be found at www.rochesterpride.com. The website is updated as events are confirmed. You can also sign up to volunteer, register to be a vendor and be in the parade, and become a sponsor! For questions and comments please feel free to email us at [email protected] Allies welcome! Like Us on Facebook: Rochester Pride (NY) 20 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

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History Corner May By Evelyn Bailey Forty years ago this month, the Gay On Liberation Front, precursor to the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, was a very active organization on the University of Meet Lt. Gov. Bob Duffy at the US Conference of Mayors' 77th Rochester Campus. Annual Meeting. Bob Duffy, as Chair of Here is the GLF Calendar for May By Evelyn Bailey the US Conference of Mayors' Criminal 1972: During this year of critical political and Social Justice committee, reported on MAY 5-7: Gay Cultural Explosion: races for the White House, Congress, the Act and was instrumental in pushing State Assembly and City Council, we Rutgers University, New Brunswick, the Marriage Equality Act policy resolu­ NJ. Cabaret, Costume ball, Love Feast, look at the shoulders of a man who rises tion to a successful vote. workshops, games, music, free food above others with boundless energy, with As Rochester's Mayor, Bob Duffy navi­ and drink, housing. Phone 275-6181 for immeasurable faith in the innovative, cre­ gated the worst economic crisis since the details and to share a ride. ative spirit of the people of New York, and Great Depression by reducing the cost MAY 6: DANCE: U of R Frederick a commitment to equality for all. of government, yet improving services. Douglass Lounge 9-1. UR Students 75 Bob Duffy, former Mayor of Roches­ Under his stewardship, the value of prop­ cents. Others: $1.50. Beer at very mod­ ter, has clearly demonstrated his willing­ erty in Rochester rose, while the tax rate erate prices. Call in your favorite steppin' ness to engage in the struggle for equality declined. He streamlined the city work­ tunes to the GLF office. We'll attempt to through his work inside and outside the force while attracting millions of dollars feature them. Senate chamber to pass Marriage Equality in private-sector investments. His mayor­ MAY 7: GLF MEETING: "Community on June 24, 2011. With Governor Andrew al accomplishments also include merging Center - What's Next?" Planning session Cuomo leading the fight, Lt. Gov. Bob three departments into the highly efficient for proposed community center. 7:30 pm, Duffy was intimately involved in helping and effective Department of Neighbor­ Todd Union. the four Republican senators who voted hood and Business Development; fostering By Appointment: Physicians will take TO STAND ON cultures for gonorrhea. No charge. yes, to see Marriage Equality as an issue government transparency and accountabil­ of basic civil rights. ity through the creation of the Office of Appointment: 275-6181 He grew up in with religious parents Public Integrity; adopting the 311 Call ment that cut New York's middle-class MAY 14: GLF MEETING: "Gays who opposed denying civil rights to indi­ Center to give citizens immediate access to rates to the lowest levels in 58 years. Between the Covers". A discussion of what writers said about us then and now. viduals. Bob Duffy saw that same sex cou­ City services; and investing in public safety Born in Rochester's Tenth Ward, MAY 21: GLF MEETING, "GAY ples were asking for nothing more than to bring Rochester's rate of serious crime to Duffy graduated from the Aquinas Insti­ ACTIVITIES IN TORONTO". Ms. Pat their civil right to life, liberty and the pur­ tute, Monroe Community College, Roch­ its lowest point in 25 years. Hurphy and M. Charles Hill from Canadian suit of happiness with justice and equality. In May 2010, Duffy was picked by ester Institute of Technology, and later obtained a Master's Degree from the homophile organization CHAT discuss their Bob Duffy's sense of proactive justice Andrew Cuomo to be the lieutenant recent government funding, the new com­ did not begin in Albany. He believes and gubernatorial nominee. They won on Maxwell School at Syracuse University. munity center, and other items of interest. has publicly stated that the worst thing Nov. 2, 2010 with 62 percent of the vote. After 28 and a half years, rising through Todd Union Music Lounge, 7:30 pm. you can do is to stand by and wait for Andrew Cuomo subsequently named Bob the ranks of the police department and GAY PICNIC: Syracuse GLF. Green decisions to be made. He has worked hard Duffy director of his transition team. In becoming the Chief in 1998, he retired Lakes State Park. 12 noon. to shape decisions, and not wait for them 2011, the first year of his administration, from that position to run for Mayor. Bob MAY 26 "GAY WOMEN'S COFFE­ to happen. Gov. Cuomo and Lt. Gov. Bob Duffy's Duffy and his wife of 27 years, Barbara, HOUSE", Women's Center, 555 E. Main. In early spring of 2009, he wrote an accomplishments included the on time have two wonderful daughters. 9 pm-I am, free refreshments. Entertain­ op-ed piece for the Democrat and Chron­ budget passed by the Legislature with a On Sunday, June 3, Tim Tompkins ment. icle supporting gay marriage, which gar­ reduction in overall spending, closing a and many others will host a tea dance MAY 28 GLF POLITICAL-LEGAL nered great media attention. In June of $10 billion budget gap, a two percent event benefiting Lt. Gov. Duffy and ACTION MEETING "GAY LEGISLA­ that same year Bob Duffy demonstrated cap on property tax increases, creation of Shoulders to Stand On, at ONE Restau­ TION '72". Who helped, who hindered, his commitment to the issue by introduc­ regional economic development councils rant & Lounge, 1 Ryan Alley. See the what happened, what can we do better ing the Marriage Equality Act as a vote (led by Duffy) and an income tax agree- article on page 27 for full details. next time?

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© 2012 Morgan Stanley Smith Barney LLC. Member SIPC. NY CS 7049422 LGBTOOI 02/12 GPlO-01806p·N08/10 22 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

chose "Becky" as her nickname. Becky to the highest degree. She learned to sew, was the oldest of five kids. Her mother, creating doll clothes and our clothes. She Beatrice, was a grass widow, her husband grew dazzling flowers that filled vases all coming every now and then, but mostly through her home. Despite her trepida­ going. Eventually gone for good. Becky tion, she passed her driver's test at age came from a broken home. 56. At 57, she learned to bowl; at 58 she Broken and dirt poor. Daily they bought her own bowling shoes. And then scoured the railroad tracks near their she giggled. The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers house to collect coal that had jiggled After she was widowed, she secretly are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the off the coal cars. When the lone parent, enrolled in a GED program. For the lon­ Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. unemployed, developed uterine cancer, gest time, she kept her textbooks and Becky had to drop out of school to take papers out of sight. Such a time, she over the household. revealed her truth. She was taking tele­ Growing Up winning play, "Craig's Wife," about a Becky's mother Beatrice suffered vised classes presented by WXXI. Had woman who valued her home and posses­ beastly surgery at Buffalo's Roswell Park aced the literature and composition class­ HARRIET CRAIG sions over personal relationships. Doesn't Cancer Institute. She was slashed open, es. But, she admitted, she was afraid of the By Eric Bellmann that just figure: Joan Crawford's most virtually gutted, and crudely sewed up. math section. My heart understood she I'm staring out wonderfully memorable quote, uttered by She suffered severe depression. But in was asking for encouragement. the window admir­ Faye Dunaway in the bio-pic "Mommy those days, women's lethargy was attrib­ The morning before her graduation ing my back yard Dearest," is said while she is chastising her uted to a flawed character. No sympathy. ceremony, she had an accident. Her car garden and I notice negligent maid: "It's not you I'm mad at, Just your typical medical bullying. was totaled, yet she refused to let the a tiny trace of grime it's the dirt." Amen, sister. Hate the dirt, The news of her mother's cancer police call an ambulance. After much around the window not the sinner. reached the ears of the neighbors. Those coaxing, I drove her to the ER. The doc­ latch. Hmm. It And so, back at home in my haven, mothers feared their children would catch tor ordered her to stay because the steer­ occurs to me that I I exercise my inevitable re-entry habit: the disease. Becky was not allowed in their ing wheel had bruised her heart. No, I can clean that with ritual cleaning. Start in one corner of one houses any more. Her playmates were for­ explained, you are breaking her heart. She a q-tip dipped in ammonia and that is room and wipe, polish, wash, whatever -­ bidden to go near her. Little Becky lost all has waited a lifetime to graduate from exactly what I do. everything and anything. On to the next her friends. Ignorance incubates Bullying. high school. I am engulfed in warm feelings of sat­ room, then on and on. More details than Besides nursing her mother, little His prescription: take these pills, get isfaction. There are web sites dedicated this overview would only be scary. The Becky had to cook and clean. And man­ dressed in your lovely white, flowing out­ to cleaning, so I'm told. I've never felt plain truth is that it works. I feel safe, in age all the childcare. No easy task. The fit, and proudly wear the purple orchid the need to consult them. I'm of German control, empowered. twins, Thelma and Ward, were devilish. corsage your daughter has given you. descent. Cleaning is ingrained, part of my And now and then, like now, the sea­ Thelma regularly escaped to the play­ That evening, Betty Winters Horning, DNA. son matches the neurosis: it's spring, a tra­ ground, swinging into the sky. One day age seventy-five, had reached a momen­ I accept no crap about my cleaning ditional time to clean up, fix up, paint up. the heavy wooden seat slammed into her tous goal. In her hands she held her hard­ fetish. Order, a place for everything and If only I could do all that for this poor, face and she lost all her teeth. Ward liked earned high school diploma. And then everything in its place, means something aging, saggy shell I'm trapped in. Oh well. to eat tomato soup right out of the can, she giggled. to me. Cleaning is a meditative activity. I Can't have everything. the family's meal gone. Little Emma Jane MeredithElizabethReiniger@Jrontier­ find it restorative. I like to take my time. I Oh, nearly forgot: Harriet Craig was the easy, quiet one. Baby Dick suf­ net. net value thoroughness. I think I have all the wasn't a happy woman. She alienated her fered from a clubfoot. Every night Becky answers but was thrilled, not at all cha­ husband, Wendell Corey in the movie, had to screw his shoes into the metal Faith Matters grined, when I realized I could vacuum no big loss in my book, but the point was brace. the back sides of small carpets. Never made that her focus on stuff didn't serve Despite the obstacles, my mother was WE ARE TRAYVON MARTIN: occurred to me! her well. determined to home school herself When LGBTQ AND AFRICAN I have no husband to offend. I love The day I was staring out the win­ she was a girl, books were her class room. AMERICANS UNITED BY dow was the day after I had returned my stuff, all of it. And yes, I know all this Every day, book in hand, she climbed the from New York, where I was baby sitting blather about Joan Crawford marks me tree behind their house and curled into MURDER two cats in a seven-room Fifth Avenue as a dinosaur, an old queen. Screw you. a cozy crook. It was the only place she By Rev. Irene apartment. All the apartment windows When I was in New York this last time could get away from her siblings, the only I ran into Jane Powell on the street near Monroe faced Central Park. I could gaze out the time she could read in peace. What does windows and watch the joggers and the Lincoln Center and this time, the third Every day, for the rest of her life, my time I've bumped into her, she and I had Trayvon Martin's cyclists along the Reservoir path. It looked mother curled up with a book ... on the murder have to do like a New Yorker cover. a longish conversation about movies - she couch, at the beach, on the porch, under a with gay civil rights The cats' owner had gone to London thought "The Artist" was just a gimmick. tree. Every Friday, once I was old enough protection? for three weeks. All I had to do was feed You don't know who Jane Powell is/ to walk, she escorted me to the library. was? Not my problem. She made one of The quick the cats and some goldfish. The owner Every Sunday of my childhood, the whole answer: The Mat­ of the apartment is a long time friend, a the best musicals ever, "Seven Brides for family would curl up with good books. Seven Brothers" and she danced with Fred thew Shepard and classy dame in her mid-80s. Do you have My mother was a teacher, of sorts. She J ames Byrd Hate Crimes Prevention Act any inkling of the problem tucked inside Astaire. She is 83 and quite attractive. taught me to love reading. (mostly known by Matthew Shepard's this scenario? Google her or go to the ImdB website if My mother had dreamed of being an name). And this might be the only option Yes. Cat hair. Mountains of it. Some you are curious. She's happy. I'm happy. artist. She told me this one day when she You have to decide for yourself what the Florida Justice Department has in old folks lose track of details, shall we say. was drawing paper dolls for me. But she moving forward to charge George Zim­ Not I. I grew up in a house with three makes you happy. Good luck. never had the option. She went to school Email: [email protected] merman with second-degree murder. cats. One belonged to my mother, one in the old days when stereotypes chained The nation is outraged that in 2012 to me and the third one, the crazy one, women to society's expectations, men's an unarmed, African-American, 17 year­ seemed uninterested in either of us. Two Cleaning My Closet needs. She was allowed to take typing or old high school student can be shot dead cats were long-haired. I don't recall either HERSTORY home economics. Expected to become a by a neighborhood watch captain because my mother or me ever brushing them. Cat housewife. Encouraged to be a stay-at­ his egregious offense was "walking while hair was just a fact of life. By Meredith home mother. black" in a gated community. By the time I was a teen queen and Elizabeth Reiniger At the age of twenty-one, Becky shed By now you are familiar with the fussing about my overall image and ward­ "Dress her up, her name and her past. She became Betty, story-on February 26, Trayvon Martin robe in particular, I recognized tufts of cat then wine her and Cecil's wife; a year later, Leslie's mother; left a 7-Eleven convenience store to head fluff as a problem. I didn't move out right dine her." Even then, at age 29, Meredith's mother. She back home to his father's fiancee's gated away, but when I finally was on my own, brunch her. Cele­ seemed content. Until, at age 54, she saw community in the Retreat At Twin Lakes off at college, then later working, cleaning brate Mothers' Day, the world through feminist eyes. The IRS in Sanford, Florida. George Zimmerman, just seemed to become important. I know, for heaven's sake. had sent a letter addressed to Mr. Cecil 28, of mixed ethnic descent (mother's I know, an orderly environment masks a The least you can Horning & wf. She was infuriated. Wf? Peruvian, and father's Jewish-he identi­ chaotic inner world. No argument. do is call your dear She refused to be condensed to two let­ fies as Hispanic) began following Trayvon People who become aware of my clean­ old mother. Unless she has left this world. ters. She pronounced it "whiff." And then and called the Sanford Police Depart­ ing obsession often joke, "Well, come and In that case, take a moment to think she giggled. ment. Although Zimmerman was advised clean my place." Dream on. I am only about her. And tell her stories. Yes, my mother was a teacher, of sorts. by his superior not to pursue Trayvon, he responsible for my own home, my own My mother was a teacher, of sorts. She She taught me to dust, even between the shot Trayvon in self-defense after a physi­ messes, such as they may be. You're on taught me to giggle. chair rungs. She taught me how to iron cal altercation initiated supposedly by your own. I'm compulsive, not stupid. Even now, years after her passing, I can daddy's white handkerchiefs and pillow Trayvon. On Fifth Avenue, I loved the cats. We see mischief in her eyes, hear the music of cases. Then sheets. And finally daddy's Was Zimmerman motivated by rac­ played hard. lover fed them. The hair did her laugh as she tells her Chemung River starched, white dress shirts. ism; therefore, racially profiling Trayvon? get on my nerves. I found cat hair in my story. She knew the deadly river was out of I learned to fold the laundry, tow­ And was Zimmerman's act also a hate underwear, in my cereal bowl. Unsettling. bounds. But she was just a kid. els neatly squared, napkins painstakingly crime? Not their fault. The old lady just never So she quietly snatched their mother's triangled. Learned to examine socks for Many politicians are throwing around knew to brush them. Again, not my job. sewing scissors, then herded the gang out holes worn in the heels and toes. Then she the h-word concerning Trayvon's murder. Soon enough the three weeks would end. the door. There they were, five towheads passed down the Managing-Socks-with­ Now many African-Americans are, too. This fact connects to an inescapable scurrying to the river bank. There they Holes Secret. Because she did not dare Renowned African American film­ horror of my life: I get to be a nanny were ... the twins and two littles huddled throw them away, because she absolutely maker Tyler Perry told CNN.com that to two adorable cats. In seconds I adore around their big sister so she could teach did not want to repair them, she taught "Racial profiling should be a hate crime them, kiss them hello and goodbye, sing them how to cut up slugs. me where to hide daddy's hole-y socks. investigated by the FBI. That way local Sondheim songs to them. Then I must My mother, born in 1915, was named And then we giggled. government can't make the decision on leave, alone, loveless. It's a maudlin tale. Bessie Minnie, after two aunts. She hated Mommy/Betty was a victorious whether or not these people get pun­ But that's another weepy story, not the her name. At school, little Bessie was woman. She nurtured a happy, forty-two ished." one I'm telling right now. taunted by classmates mooing. Bullying is year marriage. She was a mother who Perry recalled his frightening expe­ "Harriet Craig"is a 1950 Joan Craw­ not a new activity. never required her first daughter to baby­ rience when he was pulled LAPD for ford movie based on a 1926 Pulitzer Prize Trying to prevent the ridicule, she sit for the younger. She was a homemaker MAY 2012 • NUMBER 456 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET 23 making an illegal turn and having tinted was dismembered. Shepard was tortured, "Then you can cook." cement cell with no running water, windows. A black officer pulled up at the tethered to a fence and left to die because I decided to demonstrate the level of no toilets, no lights, and infested by scene, recognizing Perry. The arresting he was gay. my kitchen disability for him one time. insects. officers apologized and let him go. Perry Although Zimmerman will now be I spent all morning making a big pot of The men were denied requests for an stated that the incident, however, has tried for second degree murder, the Shepa­ homemade soup. attorney. They were told that they were stayed with him, opening his eyes to what rd-Byrd statute not only reminds us of "Hey," Bernie said, tasting my efforts. arrested for being gay and for the crime type of treatment he might have endured how bias-motivated crimes link gays and "This chili you made is delicious." of "buggery." Eventually, the two men if it wasn't for his celebrity status. blacks together, but that it's also the best "Great," I replied. "It's lentil soup." plead to the crime of indecent exposure. In 2009, President Obama signed the hope for Trayvon Martin and his family I've even complimented Bernie by tell­ As unbelievable as this story is, it Matthew Shepard and James Byrd Hate seeking justice. ing him that I thought he should have his was not long ago that the crime of "sod­ Crimes Prevention Act into law. Many own cooking show on the Food Network omy" existed in the United States. Up African-Americans were irate that their A Few Bricks Short channel. I could be his co-host. You know, until the Supreme Court's 2003 rul­ protection under the law-which they Grillin' with the Gays or Fryin' with the ing in Lawrence v. Texas, in which The argue they have fought for since being GRILLlN' WITH THE GAYS Fairies or some catchy title like that. Ber­ Court declared consensual sodomy pro­ shipped to America in 1619-had to be By David Hull nie could demonstrate how to make great, hibitions unconstitutional, states had associated with a white gay male who was I can't cook. affordable meals and I could be the one the power to criminalize lesbian, gay killed in 1998. I've never been able who tastes them and testifies that they are and bisexual activities simply because of Some African Americans, and, of to make anything delicious. moral disapproval. The framework laid course, heterosexual homophobes, wanted more than toast. "So, that would be your whole job on by Lawrence has been essential to mod­ to know why couldn't they have the James Or, on a good day, Sauteein' with the Sissies (that was anoth­ ern day legal victories, including the Byrd Hate Crimes Prevention Act solely if the stars are in er show title suggestion from me)?" Bernie repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." to protect them. Many further argued the right alignment, asked. "You would just taste the food?" Unfortunately, not every country that the law would serve to solely protect maybe I can make "Well, no," I said. "I would be your has the same rights as America, as Den­ lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender and raisin toast. announcer too. I've been told I have a very nis Mayer and John Hart learned. For queer Americans and would do precious I've destroyed dinners, murdered meals distinctive voice. I could be like the new example, last spring Uganda attempted little to protect them, particularly since and I once accidentally created a com­ James Earl Jones." to pass an anti-homosexuality bill that the bill is commonly referred to as the pletely new and unknown substance with "Yeah," replied my husband, rolling would have imposed the death pen­ Matthew Shepard Act. boiled rice that was so sticky, I bet NASA his eyes. "Except in your case it would me alty on gays and lesbians under certain "The more time I spend in the LGBT could have used it to attach those ceramic more like James Girl Jones." circumstances, including for "repeat community's civil rights movement the tiles to the old space shuttles. On more Anyway, Bernie has bravely accepted offenders." more I'm struck by the need for all the than one occasion I've used the smoke his lot in our marriage. I'll help with Current Ugandan law already called various human communities to support detector as an oven timer. My sister says the laundry, the gardening, the clean­ for 20 years to life imprisonment. The one another... Trayvon's death is as per­ the best thing I make for dinner is reser­ ing; I'll even wash the dishes. But when new law would have also lowered the bar sonal to me as any white lesbian's death ... vations. I admit I am kitchen-challenged. it comes to the kitchen - he cooks, I eat. for conviction, including, for example, Trayvon is my brother, and whether one Which makes it most advantageous "He Cooks, I Eat!" Hey, that could be the making "touching" for the purpose of is black, white, gay or straight, we are all that I married my husband, Bernie, who title of our new cooking show on Food homosexual relations a criminal offense. human beings together in this struggle happens to be a wonderful cook: lasagna, Network! This bill was placed on hold after inter­ for human dignity. It's as simple as that," meat loaf, sesame chicken, French onion You can contact David at davidhull59@ national outcry and the threats to cut Carol Fischer, wrote me in an email. soup, roast beef, homemade pizza, Asian aol.com foreign aid, or, what the Ugandan gov­ Fischer's a white lesbian and producer stir fry, eggplant Parmesan, turkey din­ ernment referred to as "undemocratic of bloomingOUT, a weekly queer radio ners with all the trimmings, macaroni Introducing a new column: threats of Western nations." (It may be show on WFHB Radio Station in Bloom­ revived, however.) and cheese and, of course, his specialty: Legally Equal ington, In. pepperoni chicken. I've always told him In Nigeria, the Senate passed a bill In 1998 both James Byrd Jr., and Mat­ that I married him just for his pepperoni TRAVELING WHILE GAY banning same sex marriage, and man­ thew Shepard were victims of bias-moti­ chicken. I believe that good looks are only dating 14 years in prison for those vated crimes. Byrd, an African American, By Marcus Kroll who marry, and 10 for those who help. skin deep, but excellent cooking goes right Recently, a was murdered by three white suprema­ to my hips! Same sex marriage had been defined cists who chained him to the back of their Southern Califor­ to include all same-sex relationships, Bernie didn't believe that I couldn't nian couple on a pick-up truck at his ankles and dragged cook. "If you can read a recipe," he insists. threatening the human rights of large along a three mile asphalt road until he gay cruise in the numbers of people. Caribbean spent Finally, just this February, St. Peters­ time in jail. Den­ burg, Russia passed a law that would nis Jay Mayer, and impose fines of up to $16,700 for the his partner of 17 "promotion of homosexuality" and years, John Rob­ which would criminalize reading, writ­ H UTH ER-DOYLE ert Hart, were arrested in Dominica ing, speaking, or reporting on anything because they were gay. related to LGBT individuals. Of course, Dominica, like several other Carib­ it was only 20 years ago that being gay HELPING YOU PUT THE PIECES BACK bean islands, has laws prohibiting sex in Russia in and of itself was still a TOGETHER between men. The couple were arrested, crime. paraded before a crowd, subjected to Needless to say, while the issue is far interrogation, and held for 26 hours, 19 from settled on the domestic front, indi­ of which were in a locked five-by-eight (Columnists continue on page 24) Joe Russo, Psy.D., CGP Licensed Psychologist ~C},e Certified Group Psychotherapist C\\~ 25 Canterbury Road, Suite 308 \. \0 Rochester, New York 14607 a40C-v.e Phone: (585) 506·6096 ~ • E·mail: [email protected] T Weekly Bi/Gay NOW OFFERING SPECIALIZED T Addiction T Depression T Trauma Men's Therapy CHEMICAL DEPENDENCY TREATMENT T Anxiety T Grief/Loss T Relationships Group TO THE GAY - LESBIAN - BISEXUAL COMMUNITY

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ing for you. COLUMNISTS With most weddings costing at least $50 per person for food and beverages, Martha M. Howden, CSW, CASAC it is only polite to show up after you said (Legal Equal continuedfrom page 23) you would. Anxiety • Depression viduals traveling should be aware of the And don't crash a wedding you have Alcohol • Stress • Grief laws where they plan to visit, whether been invited to but have not RSVP'd to. it be international or domestic travel. Put the shoe on the other foot: Imagine Relationship • Family Plan Essential documents, such as health care how you would feel if guests just showed Rectification Work proxies, should be executed in order to up at your party without telling you. Holotropic Breathwork give decision making to a loved one who You probably would not have enough • Specializing in work with may otherwise be prevented from mak­ food or even a chair for them to sit in. ing those decisions, and even discrimi­ OK, so the big day arrives. individuals and families in nated against. The obligation that day is for the wed­ the Coming Out process ding to start on time and guests to arrive NY Gay Wedding in time to be seated for the ceremony. Martha M. Howden, CSW, CASAC Grooms and Brides, do test runs of Consultant your primping and pampering. Plan 945 E. Henrietta Road, Suite A6 WEDDING ETIQUETTE plenty of time for getting ready and get­ Rochester, New York 14623 ting to the ceremony site at least a half Phone: 585 272-1760 By Eve Elzenga hour before the wedding is set to begin. Fax: 585 272-8986 Spring is here Guests, give yourself extra time to and gay wed­ drive to the wedding venue especially if Most Insurances Accepted ding season is it is a location you are unfamiliar with. in full bloom in You also need enough time to park the New York State. car and walk into the ceremony. Whether you are a Oh, and don't forget the gift. happy couple plan­ Cheryl's Kitty B&B ning a ceremony or In the olden days people sent the a guest attending gift to the bride's home in advance of one, there are expectations and obliga­ the wedding. This is still a great idea. Luxury In-Home tions for all involved. This month's col­ It means that as a guest you don't have Cat Boarding umn will help you negotiate the world to lug a big box to a reception and then of some basic wedding etiquette. make the married couple drag it to their room, their car and finally to their home. For all the brides and grooms out SUNDAY WORSHIP there, make sure that you get your invi­ Of course the most popular choices tations into the mail or e-mail six weeks of a gift these days are gift cards, checks 8:30am Third Church chapel before the wedding. You might even and cash, along with donations to a , 0:45am Third Church sanctuary want to send out "save the date" cards or charity the couple has chosen. You can e-mails as far as one year from your wed­ also send these gifts in advance. ding date. This is especially true if you Brides and Grooms need to assign the BORN THIS WAY (LGBT Support) are having a destination wedding or your job of "Gift Security" to a friend or rela­ At Cheryl's Kitty B&B your kitty 7:30pm First & Third Mondays tive. The gift envelope box should not be 34 Meigs Street guests are coming from long distances has their own bedroom! like foreign countries and the Left Coast. left alone and should be emptied often. For the guests, it is important to Gifts need to be removed at the end of send your RSVP back to the couple the reception and moved to a secure site. itd P~erian Church ASAP. It's rude not to respond, and If you have questions I can help with, 585-458-7576 ~king the Light more annoying to make your friends please email NYGayWeddingConsul­ www.KittyBB.com 4 Meigs Street (at East Ave nue) 585.271. 6513 chase you down to find out if you are tant.com or call me at 585 733-2579. I www.thirdpresbyterian.org going to attend a party they are provid- would love to hear from you. Have fun!

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Now for the best part: Saturday, Sept. 1 what she was experiencing. Indeed it is will be designated as Transgender Day safe to say that, besides singing, being at the Fair. They are asking for volun­ there for each other is what the members eommunity teers to help organize and distribute of the Rochester Women's Community information. So save the date and we'll Chorus do best. see you at the Fair! Their website is: As an extension of that spirit of sup­ www.fairny.org. port, and in hopes of helping at-risk Another encouraging sign: at our youth, the chorus plans to donate a por­ Find the friends, fun, and common interests you're looking for through March 24 meeting we had Christina tion of its concert's proceeds to the Gay the various groups listed below. Miller, Community Health Initiative Alliance of the Genesee Valley. Specialist-LG BT from AIDS Care, who The RWCC's spring concert will be used our meeting as a focus group to held on Saturday, June 9 at 7:30 p.m. in COMEOUTDANCIN': to be. The night is for fun and having help determine the need for a dedicat­ St. Anne's Church (1600 Mount Hope a good time. ed LG BT health clinic here in Greater Ave.). If you're interested in further SWING SWING SWING For more information, call Bob at Rochester and what we felt was impor­ information about the RWCC, or are considering joining the group, please ComeoutDancin' has had a very suc­ 585-467-6456, or e-mail bmdaniels@ tant to be considered in such a clinic, frontiernet.net. Our Yahoo web page even to what the clinic should be called. go to the website: http://www.therwcc. cessful year! Our LGBT Swing Dance orgl Community has grown and become is http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Lilac­ Also thanks to Jeanne Gainsburg for stronger. We have made new friends, Squaresl bringing in what she called the "Every­ improved our Swing steps and had a Hope to see you soon. thing Brownie." Kayla, you may have ROMANS great time doing so. some competition! Our next meeting will be Saturday, ROchester MAle NaturistS And now, our ComeoutDancin' 2011- JUST US GUYS (ROMANS) is a social organization of 2012 season will come to a close this May 26, 3-5:30 p.m., when we will talk With the Merry Month of May upon about being in the Pride Parade and gay naturists who enjoy camaraderie in month. So don't miss your chance to the nude. dance with us before our next season us, our members have been considering having some type of Trans Pride event the many varied activities in the area for Pride Week. We are gay, bi, and gay-friendly rolls around. Please join us for Comeout­ men over the age of twenty-one. We are Dancin's last two remaining sessions on during the month. We meet in the Gay Alliance Youth Among the many offerings and of Center, located in the Auditorium Cen­ all sizes, big and small. We are single, Sunday, May 6 and Sunday, May 20 at partnered, married, and divorced. We the Friends Meetinghouse, 84 Scio St., particular interest are the Gay Men's ter, 875 E Main St. Parking is available Chorus benefit function, the return of in the back of the theatre, off Prince are short and tall, wide and thin, quiet from 3-5 p.m. You'll be glad you did! and outgoing. We are young and not so Our 2012-2013 season will begin on the Calamari Sisters in their new pro­ St. and College Ave. Note: if there is duction of "Big Fat Italian Wedding," a guard at the booth, just say you're young, furry and smooth. ROMANS Sunday, Oct. 7, same time, same place. is an inclusive social group for all men Until then ... keep dancin'. the Crafting Modernism exhibit at the here for the Gay Alliance and they have Memorial Art Gallery, and the perfor­ instructions to let you in without paying who are gay-friendly, who love to laugh mance of "Company" at Geva Theatre. the parking fee. and learn, and who enjoy nude social DIGNITY-INTEGRITY We plan to compare notes next month Come celebrate the spring -- come activities. as to who enjoyed what! to a meeting! You never know what you We have upcoming barbecue picnics D-I Rochester meets weekly at 5 p.m. in May and June for our monthly meet­ at St. Luke's and St. Simon's Church, 17 The regular date for the JUG's meet­ might learn or who you might meet. For ings. Camping weekend at Jones Pond S. Fitzhugh St., corner of Broad St. We ing this month is May 8, when we plan a calendar, a listing of other groups in to organize a movie night at the Dryden Greater Rochester and more informa­ July 13-15 and GNI's 28th annual men's have the following services and activities nude Gathering in the Pocono Moun­ for the month of May, 2012. Theatre. For those interested, we will tion on trans-friendly services, visit our gather at a nearby restaurant for din­ website: www.rnytg.org. tains of Pennsylvania is coming up in First Sunday: Episcopal Mass/Heal­ late August. ing Service, with music; second Sunday: ner prior to movie time. First timers are always welcome at these gatherings. Visit the Romans web site where Roman Catholic Liturgy of the Word, ROCHESTER WOMEN'S an application for membership and with music; third Sunday: Quiet Epis­ For more information about the movie and dinner plans, contact Ron at COMMUNITY CHORUS: information about the club is avail­ copal Mass in the Chapel; fourth Sun­ able. http://www.wnyroman.com or day: Evening Prayer, followed by Picnic 729-2259 or email rmatter1@rochester. SINGING SONGS OF rr.com E-mail:[email protected]. call in the Park. FRIENDSHIP AND SUPPORT our message line at 585-281-4964 or May Potluck Theme: Picnic in the write ROMANS, PO Box 92293, Roch­ Park! I can't believe it is time for our ROCHESTER BUTCH "With You by My Side" is the lyri­ ester, NY 14692. annual Memorial Day event. After a cal theme of the Rochester Women's short prayer service we'll head over to FEMME CONNECTION Community Chorus' upcoming spring Genesee Valley Park to fire up a grill The Rochester Butch-Femme Con­ concert. TEAM ROCHESTER and have a great time. We'll supply the nection will have two supper events in Those five simple words seem to FOR GAY GAMES 2014 IN charcoal, beverages, and eating utensils. May 2012. On Saturday, May 12, we form the beginning to a longer sentence, You bring a dish to share and whatever will meet at Monte Alban Mexican Res­ one with a hopeful ending that might go CLEVELAND you want to grill. No time to cook? taurant on East Ridge Road in Irond­ something like this: "I am not afraid" or It's time to form, organize and plan Join us anyway as there is always plenty equoit at 7 p.m. "I can do anything" or maybe just "I'll for representing Rochester at the next to share. On May 26 we will meet at Takumi be OK." The chorus' decision to spread Gay Games & Cultural Festival, being Near the end of the month, we are Japanese Steakhouse Restaurant on Jef­ this heartfelt message of hope, friend­ held in Cleveland. planning to hold a Home Liturgy to cel­ ferson Road in Hentietta at 7 p.m. ship and support was made following This probably will be the closest the ebrate Pentecost. If you are interested in For further information on the Con­ the tragic loss of one of the group's cher­ Gay Games will ever be held near Roch­ attending, please call the D-I hotline for nection, contact Kerry/Max at (585) ished members. Trisha MacFarlane is, ester. Events include swimming, track details and directions. 288-7208, email DressyFemme@aoi. and will always be, dearly missed. and field events, bowling, dancing, ice HEADS UP! First weekend in June com or check out our Facebook page The words "With You by My Side" skating, bicycling and MANY more. is the annual Barn Sale in Lima. This http://www.facebook.com/bfconnection come from a song that the chorus per­ Bowlers need to establish an aver­ is part of the "Trail of Treasure" with formed at the "Making Strides Against age, so definitely consider bowling in sales all along Rt. 5 from Caledonia to Breast Cancer" walk last fall. Dur­ a sanctioned league this coming 2012- Bloomfield. Come and browse and join ROCHESTER GLBTQI ing that same time period, one of the 2013 season. the fun! Donations are always welcome. group's own members was, as she put it, If you have ANY interest in partici­ You can always get in touch with MOTORCYCLE GROUP "going through the demands of breast pating along with your sport(s), or if you us through our website (http://www. Hey, Spring is finally here! Time to cancer." Ruth Landry is a brave woman have interest in organizing, please con­ di-rochester.orgl) or by calling the DI get up and get out! who took great comfort in the kindness tact us: [email protected]. Hotline at 585-234-5092. Our group is made up of newbies, and generosity of the women of her cho­ An organizational meeting will be people who put on a lot of mileage, rus, some of whom had been through announced within the next few months . • GAY SQUARE DANCE and long time bikers. We are all joined, GROUP - THE LILAC apart from the obvious, by our sport, and helping each other. A real nice SQUARES group of people! We need a few more people inter­ For more information, look at our Elaine Elkins, M.S. ested in taking a class; we already have Yahoo group profile: http://autos. almost enough for a square, but need groups.yahoo.com/group/rochester­ Psychotherapist two or three more people to square GLBTQIbikersl. You can also call Bob 244~4837 things up. If you are interested, give me at 467-6456, or e-mail bmdaniels@fron­ a call. tiernet.net. Let's ride with pride! Classes will be each Monday at the Individual & Relationship Counseling Open Arms Metropolitan Community ROCHESTER TRANS Anxiety & Depression Church located on 740 Marshall Rd., GROUP 14624 at 7 p.m. Loneliness & Separation We are a fun, lively and friendly First, some really exciting and group made up of singles, couples, men, encouraging news. We got a letter from Conflict Resolution and women, young and young at heart; FAIRNY (Focus on Awareness and when we aren't learning new calls, we Information Resources of New York) Communication Skills are telling stories, jokes, and lively anec­ letting us know that during the NY Sexual Abuse Recovery dotes. We usually learn a couple of new State Fair (Aug. 23-Sept. 3 in Syracuse), calls each night, and if we make mis­ the week of 8/24-9/1 will be LGBT Drug & Alcohol Abuse takes, our caller will review the calls for week. Grief & Loss us. We are a very easy-going group, and There will be an LGBT booth, with missteps happen. There will someone people handing out literature and put­ there to guide you to where you need ting a human face on our community. 26 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

ROOFS SIDING WINDOWS PAINTING MAY 2012 • NUMBER 456 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET 27

wright, director, and so on, but I would like to direct as well. I miss tearing apart a script and getting into a rehearsal space t with actors." "South Pacific" includes very serious content about racism as a major part of the plot - "You have to be taught to hate and fear. .. You have to be carefully taught." doing it ever since. I did seen Wall St. and Main St., and really got­ Erik commented, "The Lincoln Cen­ theatre in high school ten a feel for the breadth of this country. ter Production that this tour is based on and attained a BFA from "Being away from loved ones can be focused more on the circumstances of Point Park University, hard. I don't know how traveling perform­ the war, the true gritty emotion of deal­ all the while continuing ers did it before cell phones, email, Skype ing with racism at a time when our coun­ to work backstage with and the like. My girlfriend and I try to talk try was fighting a menace that was killing lighting, sound and stage as often as we can but it's definitely not the people based on race. The movie tends to management." easiest thing in the world." feel a little more 'fun musical' than a piece Being in a musical If Erik had his ultimate wish, he would pulled from the times. It's great to see the usually requires triple love a juicy role as a villain. "I would love folks representing America having to deal skills - acting, singing to play Sweeney Todd," he said. "I love with the prejudice that is against the ideal and dancing. Which Sondheim and the character, and I've been of America. The question becomes, 'Can does Erik prefer? "I think wanting to play a villain for a long time. these folks live up to what they're supposed of myself primarily as I would also love to originate a role, but I to be fighting for?'" an actor, using speech, feel like I might be a bit far from that in He ends, ''All of us are greatly thrilled movement and singing to my career as of now." to be bringing this production to town, it's tell the story," he said. Would he enjoy being in films or a fantastic show that can touch everyone, ''I'm certainly not a triple directing? ''As long as they're paying," he for everyone has someone in their family threat, but I move well jokes. ''All kidding aside, I do enjoy the that lived through this war, whether serv­ for a larger guy and I can on-camera work I've done, and would ing in the foxholes in Europe or the islands certainly carry a tune." love to be able to straddle the worlds. If of the South Pacific, or working in the The performers who I couldn't, I would have to choose the factories at home while rationing goods inspire him most are the stage. I have thought of directing and I for the troops. Add to that the wonderful great vaudevillians, espe­ did quite a bit of it in college. At heart I'm story and score by Rogers and Hammer­ cially Bud Abbot and a storyteller, and I'm best at being a char­ stein and you've got an important story to Lou Costello, George acter on the stage, serving the text, play- be told that will capture your imagination Erik Cheski: "South Burns and Gracie Allen, Jack Benny and and live in your heart." • Pacific" is a classic, both Eddie Anderson. Erik said, "I admire them not only because of their comedy, but the fun and serious polish of their performances. These per­ By Susan Jordan formers would typically have eight to ten Erik Cheski plays "Stewpot" in the shows a day, and that meant that after a production of South Pacific opening at the few successful years that they would have RBTL's Auditorium Theatre. Catch this done an incredible amount of performanc­ revival of the classic Rogers & Hammer­ es and have been able to refine their craft stein musical May 15-20. Tickets are avail­ to such a high extent, while also being able able at Ticketmaster.com; at 800-745-300; to deal with any type of audience. I don't at the box office or at RBTL.org. often see artistry that matches theirs in Erik told The Empty Closet, "I was today's theatre scene, and it's an ideal that born and raised in Pittsburgh, Pa. I actu­ I like to aspire to. I don't know if I could ally started as a technician, working back­ ever get there, but it's a goal I push for." stage during the shows running flies and Erik says of his character, "He's a moving sets in middle school. I was mov­ big kid, and like the other SeaBees, he's ing a table onstage during a production of completely out of his element. He's never 'Huck Finn' and got caught as the lights been more than 50 miles from home and came up on me and two other deckhands. he's suddenly in this gorgeous tropical I decided to break the cardinal rule of a paradise. He knows that he's going to be tech and speak, yelling 'Cheese it, they're shipping out sometime, but the waiting is home.'" interminable, and like the other SeaBees "The director came up to me after he's trying to make the best of waiting the show and told me that he'd fail me in Heaven to be sent to Hell. He works in his class the next year unless I audi­ for Billis because it lets him get things he Local choreographers Box Theatre located at the University tioned to be in the shows, and I've been wouldn't otherwise have, and he keeps show work May 4 at Buffalo's Center for the Arts, North the peace for him." Campus. Most actors have a love/hate relation­ Rochester based choreographer James Both performances are at 7:30 pm. ship with being on tour. Erik commented, Hansen and Buffalo choreographer Also included in the concert will be Tea Dance at One to "I love being on the road, every day is a Melanie Aceto have joined forces to Anne Burnidge Dance from Buffalo and new adventure, a new place where I can produce a new concert of contemporary Richmond Virginia's premiere modern honor Duffy, Bailey meet people and see how amazing this dance called "In Motion" on Friday, dance company Starr Foster Dance Mark your calendars now! Sunday country really is. I've been to 47 out of the May 4 at the Tango Cafe, 389 Gregory Project. June 3, is the date for a tea dance party 50 states between the tours I've done. I've St., and Saturday, May 5 at the Black (Local continues next page) with entertainment, laughs, fun and tasty hors d'oeuvres at One Restaurant, 1 Ryan Alley (off East Ave. at Alexander.) World War I (Carl Ackerman, class This event, 3-8 p.m., will be a fund­ of 1913) to Revolution in Egypt raiser for Robert]. Duffy, the Lt. Gover­ (Rawya Rageh, class of 2006.) The nor of New York, and Evelyn Bailey, chair Faces of Poverty photography of Mr. of the Shoulders to Stand On Rochester Rivera-Ortiz (class of 1998) is story LGBT History Project of the Gay Alli­ #38, between The Threat from Paki­ ance. DJs Jon Herbert and Hector will stan (Steve Kroft, '75) and 9111 (Tim provide the music. Townsend, '98). Tim Tompkins, owner of One, says, The Journalism School selected "Bob Duffy is a man who has been Mr. Rivera-Ortiz specifically because supportive of the LGBT community in his photography of people living his official capacity as Rochester's Police around the world in poverty tells Chief, Mayor, and now as Lt. Governor. such a compelling story. Nine of his He championed the Marriage Equality photos are posted on the school's Act at the US Conference of Mayors in website. 2009 and on the floor of the State legisla­ "I was astonished and humbled ture in 2011. Bob has supported many of to be selected by the Journalism our local HIV/AIDS endeavors, including School," says Rivera-Ortiz, a Roches­ acting as host of a World AIDS Day fun­ ter native and former Empty Closet draiser before he was elected Mayor and volunteer. "I had no idea I was to be speaking out on behalf of the great local honored as part of their Centennial work done by Dr. Michael Keefer, head Celebration." of the HIV Vaccine Trials, at a Strong Columbia U. honors honored by his alma mater, Colum­ bia University's Joseph Pulitzer Gradu­ Five large photos by Mr. Rive­ Memorial Hospital event last year at my Manuel Rivera-Ortiz ra-Ortiz of children in poverty in home. ate School of Journalism in the City of The Manuel Rivera-Ortiz Foun­ New York, as one of its distinguished 50 Kenya, Bolivia and India are now on "We want to create a committee of 100 long-term display in the World Room hosts (at a $200 appreciation level). This dation for International Photography Great Stories of the past century by jour­ reported on April 13 that its President nalism alumni of the school. on the third floor of the Journalism will prove to be a wonderful community School's building . • event demonstrating our support for two and Founder, Mr. Rivera-Ortiz, has been The 50 stories range in time from very worthy people and their great work!" 28 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

(Local continued from page 27) Geva stages Sondheim's Each of the choreographers have been produced both nationally and internation­ Company May 9·June 10 ally. They have joined forces to create a Geva Theatre Center's 2011-2012 Wil­ concert of contemporary and cutting edge son Mainstage Season concludes with work that focuses on collaboration with Stephen Sondheim and George Furth's composers and artists and new approaches musical "Company," which begins perfor­ to sound and text. mances on May 9 and runs in the Elaine Hansen will be presenting his dance P. Wilson Mainstage through June 10. "Lovely" which premiered last summer Single and eligible, Bobby can't com­ at the prestigious Jacob's Pillow Dance mit to a long-term relationship, let alone Festival. This work blends theatrical­ marriage. His friends are all married; some ity and complex partnering sequences to happily, some unhappily and some ... just look and occasionally laugh at tradition­ coasting along. He is their best friend, al roles for women in American society. confidante, mediator and babysitter all Music is by Frank Sinatra and an original wrapped up in a charming bachelor. In sound design by Hansen that incorporates the search for one perfect person to share 1950s instruction films addressing proper his life with, will Bobby end up losing behavior for young women. himself? Melanie Aceto, best known for her collaborative work with musicians, will be Transgender character presenting "Portage", a complex and lively group work to a new score by composer joins Glee cast Marc Mellits. "True Love" showcases Starr Glee, which received the GLAAD Foster Dance Project at their best with Media Award last year for Outstanding Alex Newell as Unique. Foster's unique humor, inventive partner­ Comedy Series, raised the bar for diver­ ing, and ability to make a statement that sity on network television again on April saying "I hope one day you have enough last year, when the Hollywood Reporter evokes thought. Anne Burnidge's "Neces­ 18 when it introduced a new character courage to be him." To which Wade noted during an interview that he had sary Grace", created in collaboration with named Unique, a transgender African responds ''Actually, Unique's a her." appeared in drag on The Glee Project sev­ multimedia artist Samantha Gorman, is American student and performer in rival But the key moment came later in the eral times. Alex replied that he'd be happy a meditative journey of the human soma glee club Vocal Adrenaline. episode, after Kurt and Mercedes try to to, explaining that he understands how and psyche. The character is played by Alex New­ talk Unique out of performing in women's important representation is in the media, Dances will be performed by guest art­ ell, who finished as a runner up on The clothes for fear of a backlash. Kurt tells and saying, "I go to different schools to ists from Richmond, Baltimore, Buffalo, Glee Project, the Oxygen reality show in her "I've worn some flamboyant outfits, visit friends and I see [transgenderJ kids New York, and Rochester. Tickets for the which a group of hopefuls competed for a but I've never dressed up as a woman." To and it's hard. Not too many television Rochester concert at Tango Cafe are $10 spot on Fox's hit show. which Unique replies, "That's because you shows shed light on that, it's that hidden general admission and can be purchased Audiences first saw Unique as Wade, identify yourself as a man. I thought you thing that not everybody wants to talk at the door. Free parking is available in a shy student from a different high school of all people would understand." about. But it is there and there are people parking lots on Gregory St. and on Cayu­ who gushed with fandom for Kurt and Rather than play it safe, Unique per­ that want to be able to turn the television ga St. adjacent to the Tango Cafe building Mercedes and asked for their advice on forms the KC & The Sunshine Band hit on and see somebody else who is just like as well as on the street. coping as outsiders. Wade recalled being "Boogie Shoes" onstage wearing a flapper them. I feel like if I were able to that, I'd Tickets at the University at Buffalo's tormented by other kids at school and dress and glittery high heels, and receives be beside myself and happy." Center for the Arts are $15 general admis­ even family members, and revealed, "Ever a rapturous response from the crowd. As one of The Glee Project's runners­ sion, $10 students and can be purchased since I was a kid, I would play this game. Kurt and Mercedes later remark how up, Alex was only contracted to appear in at the door or ahead of time. To charge Where I would pretend I was a different impressed they were with Unique's resolve one more episode of the show, but there tickets to a credit card call 1-800-745- person. The person I dreamed of being. to be herself is reason to be optimistic. If the writers 3000. For more information, please call The real me. I even have a different name. Actor Alex Newell was actually asked and producers are happy enough with the 585-201-0656 or e-mail jphansenl964@ Unique." about the possibility of playing a transgen­ audience response, Unique could easily gmail.com . • Kurt offers some words of support, der character on Glee back in August of return in a recurring capacity.

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"Gives hope to anyone on the frontline of our equality struggle."

Lt. Dan (hoi, West Point Graduate, Iraq War Veteran "An inspiring odyssey of self-discovery ... This book is a winner!" Kathryn Shay, Author of The Perfect Family " . .. a genuine record of a difficult gay life from the 1950s to the 1990s. "

American Library Association GLBT Roundtable " ... an honest story of love, loss, redemption ... both easy and fun to read."

James Mack, review for Empty Closet " . .. an eerie sense of Deja vu while turning each page with unbridled anticipation."

Dr. Ray Werking, WRPI HOMO Radio

A compelling saga blended with rich WNY gay history and references!

Book give-away events at www.animpossibledreamstorv.com (checkout "bike-book tour" section) MAY 2012 • NUMBER 456 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET 29

Save the date: dYke forward and start other groups, clubs, or "Franny The Queen of Local author's Tinseltown social gatherings for women," she said. picnic, womyn's festival The picnic is making free workshop Provincetown" runs May is Lambda Literary take place on June 30 space and free information table space 4·6 at Rainbow Festival Awards finalist available for groups looking to promote By Casey Sullivan Tinseltown, a novel by Rochester-area their organizations at the picnic. "We The Rainbow Theatre Festival, pre­ On Saturday, June 30, from 11 a.m. to native Barry Brennessel, was selected as would love to see more women, espe­ sented by Bread & Water Theatre, will 9 p.m., all women are invited to join the a finalist in the 24th Annual Lambda cially younger women, who will want to stage its final production, "Franny, the first annual dYke Picnic and Womyn's Literary Awards, to be held in New York become more involved in their commu­ Queen of Provincetown," at 243 Rosedale Festival at the Hazelwood Lodge in Elli­ on June 4. nity, and eventually take over this event St. on May 4 and 5 at 8 p.m. and May 6 at son Park. The novel follows the adventures of a and continue on with this new annual 2 p.m. The play is directed by Tony Perri. Sue Timian and her wife Cathie quirky, adorable gay film student, Micah tradition for years to come." "Franny," a memory play and history started Lesbians of Rochester and Allies Malone, as he navigates the trials and The picnic is free and open to women, of the LGBT movement from the 1950s (L.O.R.A.) last year. It rose from humble to the 1980s, was adapted for the stage by tribulations of life and love. Tinseltown is their families, friends and allies. Parking from MLR Press, a Rochester-area pub­ beginnings, with the two of them host­ Tony Perri and JR Teeter, from the novel is free and there are accessible handicap lisher of gay fiction with a worldwide ing movies, games, and karaoke for other by John Preston, women at their home. Their Facebook spaces for those with valid parking per­ readership. mits. Vegetarian and vegan options will Franny is a proud, protective friend to Fort more information: http:// group now has over 250 local women the gay men of Provincetown as they fight and a monthly social on the second Fri­ be available. Outside food and drinks www.lambdaliterary.org/foundation­ their battles against self hatred and ostra­ day of each month. The group meets at are allowed. Guests will need to bring updates/03/20/24th-annual-lambda-lit­ cism. Haunted by the loss of his first love, the GAGV Youth Center for L.O.R.A.'s cash to purchase food or merchandise, erary-award-finalists-announced/ Franny vows to create a place in the world monthly Potluck and Games Night. For as there are no bank machines available http://www.mlrbooks.com/Show­ for everyone who feels they do not belong. more information on L.O.R.A., please in Ellison Park. There will be a dona­ Book.php?boobBBTINSEL . visit www.l-o-r-a.com. tion box for guests to give what they can Tickets are $12/regular $6/ student L.O.R.A. is one of the driving forc­ afford. and seniors; special group rates for youth. es behind this year's dYke Picnic. "We Cathie says any amount will be great­ decided to throw a picnic because Roch­ ly appreciated. "Whether they give 50 ester is lacking in social activities, pro­ cents or a dollar or five dollars, it doesn't gramming, and celebrations for and matter! It all adds up and we appreciate about women and specifically gay/queer it!" According to their website, the dYke identified women." The family-friendly picnic will donate 100 percent of the picnic welcomes anybody who loves and proceeds made from their silent auction celebrates women and the women's com­ and raffle to Alternatives for Battered munity. Women. Cathie said, "Its focus is on women There will be free entertainment and - all women. This includes gay, straight, a list of workshops with the topics and and questioning women. We hope to times will be available in the dYke picnic spotlight women's rights, hers tory, fami­ June newsletter. There will be a stand-up lies, voices, health, businesses, products, comic, performers, and even activities for etc. It is hosted by women for women. children found in the Kids Zone. Not to be separate in any way, but to be "We're excited to see Kelli Dunham made to feel more visible, more included, LIVE!" said Cathie and Sue. more respected, more appreciated, more For single women planning on attend­ honored, loved, and understood. I would ing, there is a fun activity planned. The say this is different in that it's completely dYke picnic is introducing a Message all about women!" Center where single women can receive Cathie hopes this picnic will be the messages from potential admirers. beginning for a stronger, more prominent To volunteer for this event, or for women's social community in Rochester. more information, visit www.dykepicnic. "Our hope is that more women will come org and see the June Empty Closet.

ROCHESTER WOMEN'S COMMUNITY CHORUS Presents

A Concert of Friendship Caring Community Spirit of Hope Meaningful Relationships A portion of the concert proceeds will go to support the GAGV Youth Group

Saturday June 9th, 7:30 pm St. Anne's Church 1600 Mt. Hope Ave. Tickets Available from: Chorus members, Equal=Grounds Coffee

$10 Adult $8 Senior/Student $5 Children 12 and under Sign Language Interpreted Handicap Accessible www.therwcc.org 585-234-4441

BASED ON THE LINCOLN CENTER THEATER PRODUCTION I 30 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

THE GAY ALLIANCE PLAYS A CENTRAL ROLE IN ADVOCATING FOR THE FAIR AND EQUAL TREATMENT OF ALL PEOPLE, REGARDLESS OF THEIR SEXUAL ORIENTATION, GENDER IDENTITY OR GENDER EXPRESSION, Gay AUiance of the Genesee Valley WWW.GAYALLIAN C E. 0 RG

Program Notes

Gay Alliance offers SafeZone training The Gay Alliance's Education and Outreach Program will be offering a SafeZone Training to the public on Saturday, May 12 from 9:30 a.m.-noon in the Gay Alliance Youth Center (875 E. Main St., first floor). This fast paced, educational train­ ing is perfect for health providers, student leaders, teachers, and anyone who wants to make a difference in their workplace or school. We will dis­ cuss inclusive language, sexual iden­ tity, issues of coming out, transgender From Big Gay Prom 2011 issues, and how to be an effective ally. All participants will receive a Safe­ Prom location change youth will be free to be themselves, dance ings were in Rush and Hentietta. Zone sticker for their office, school or The Big Gay Prom, known this year and socialize without harassment. Allies In May, Rainbow SAGE goes on the home upon completion. Training fee is as the Gaga Prom, "Born This Way," will ages 13-23 are also welcome. road to the Chili Public Library on May $10 per person. No registration neces­ take place Friday, May 18 in the Cathe­ The Prom runs from 7-11 p.m. 3, 1-2 p.m., Mendon on May 4, also 1-2 sary. Please contact Jeanne Gainsburg dral Room of the Auditorium Center, 875 Contact Jess Cohen at 244-8640 ext. p.m., and Brockport Public Library on May 18, 10:30-11:30 a.m. at [email protected] or 585- E. Main St., 4th floor. Pre-sale tickets are 13, or email her at [email protected]. 244-8640 ext. 14 with questions . • $10 and tickets at the door are $15. LGBT if you are a Youth Group supporter will­ City libraries will not be excluded: ing to donate food for the Prom. Pre-made Rainbow SAGE will visit Maplewood on desserts, fruit and appetizers are most May 8, 1-2 p.m., the Phyllis Wheatley welcome - thanks to everyone willing to Library on May 7, also 1-2 p.m. and the contribute! Winton Library on May 10, from 1:30 to Several major youth events took place 2:30 p.m. in April. First was the Day of Silence held Kelly Clark says, "We're trying to this year at Tilt (see page one), with a per­ get out around Montoe County and formance by Levi Kreis. let LGBT seniors know the program is Jamie Nabozny, safe schools advocate available. We're interested in increasing and subject of the film "Bullied," visited SAGE membership. The monthly pot­ with Youth Group members on April 5, lucks will now also be member meetings. and the film was screened at the Youth If you're a SAGE member, this will be Center. (See Interview, page 7.) your chance to attend a monthly meet­ The final College Tour of the spring ing and have your ideas heard. We hope was on April 9, when Youth Group mem­ to get more people interested in planning bers visited Wells College on Cayuga group events." Lake. They met with admissions and with From Brian Hurlbut: Hi everyone members of Saga, the campus gay group, and welcome to the great outdoors as we and attended an anthropology class. open our windows to spring and breath Also in April, Jess, Youth Group mem­ in the new air and aroma that it brings. bers Dontaee Williamson and Candace, Be sure to join us on Sunday, May 6 and Christina Miller from AIDS Care, at 3 p.m. for our monthly euchre. Begin­ attended GLSEN's Students of Color ner or expert, all are welcome. Even come Organizing Conference in Baltimore. to learn the game or cheer someone on, On March 31, a Youth Summit was but an RSVP is suggested by contacting held at the Youth Center. The event Ginny at [email protected]. The Ride For Pride Family of the Month: was planned by the GLSEN Jump Start location is the South Wedge Planning THE POLASHENSKIS Group with support from GLSEN, the Committee Building, 224 Mt. Hope Gay Alliance and AIDS Care and drew 27 Avenue in Rochester. Be sure to mark What hasn't this family done for Ride For Pride? Pam Polashenski, co-founder of this people. There were 11 workshops and the your calendar as well for our fall euchre Gay Alliance bike ride fund raiser, has biked in every ride and last year brought in the goal was to increase a sense of empower­ tournament happening Sept. 23. most money in donations of all the non-staff members. ment and social/educational support for Our next "Third Sunday Potluck" The Polashenski Family has paid for and provided lunch for all the riders every year! LG BT youth in the Rochester area. is on Sunday, May 20. We have a new This year Walter and Tallis will cook the lunch, Ana will be driving one of our support starting time. Come at 3:30 p.m. for a vehicles and Pam and Maya will be riding. Please consider supporting this family which Rainbow SAGE update meet-n-greet and then the potluck begins is supporting us in so many ways! Rainbow SAGE on the Road has right at 4 p.m. No speaker, but we are Pam and Maya's fundraising page links are: started its meetings at area branch librar­ making our potlucks more of a time to http://www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/pam-polashenskilride-for-pride-3 ies. The first event was in April at the get together as members of Rainbow http://www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/mayapolashenskilride-for-pride-3 Webster Library. The other April gather- SAGE and talk about what we would

The Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley: is a non-profit agency, dedicated to cultivating a healthy, inclusive environment where lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans-gender (LGBT) people are safe, thriving and enjoying equal rights, We are a coalition of individuals and groups working to empower LGBT people, to affirm their identities, and to create an atmosphere where the diversity of our community can thrive both collectively and separately, We educate and advocate for civil rights for all and for the eradication of homophobia, • Address: 875 East Main Street, Rochester, New York 14605 Hours: Mon,-Fri., 9am-5pm • Phone: (585) 244-8640. Fax: (585) 244-8246. Web: www,gayalliance,org Board President: John Altieri • Interim Executive Director: Anne Wakeman • Education and Outreach Director: Scott Fearing Wellness and Safety: Kelly Clark • Outreach: Jeanne Gainsburg • Youth Program Director: Jessica Cohen The Empty Closet: Editor: Susan Jordan • Designer: Jim Anderson Phone: (585) 244-9030 • Fax: (585) 244-8246 • Advertising: (585) 244-9030 • E-mail: emptycloset@gagv,us MAY 2012 • NUMBER 456 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET 31 like to do in the following months, mak­ ing our programming more of a group project. The location is First Universal­ Speaking Engagementsl ist Church, 150 South Clinton, corner of Court St. Bring a dish to pass if you can and all are welcome. Tabling for April 2012 Our women's group is no longer meeting at this time, but our men's group is growing. Contact Tony Perri at 4/2 Coming Out Issues at Hilton High School The Gay Alliance [email protected] for more information 4/2 SafeZone Training at Nazareth College SW Dept. offers as date, time and location can vary from 4/3 Tabling at Nazareth College Health Fair month to month. 4/4 Tabling at Enough is Enough Fair at MCC Youth Services We hope to be meeting up on Senior 4/4 SafeZone Training at Nazareth College SW Dept. for Rochester area Day at the Lilac Festival and are plan­ 4/10 LGBT Issues in Social Work at SUNY Brockport LGBTQ and allied ning a trip to a Red Wings Game in 4/10 LGBT Youth Issues at Monroe County Legislature June. More information will be in our 4/11 SafeZone Training at Rochester Kink Society youth ages 13-25 Rainbow SAGE connections newsletter. 4/12 Adoption and Custody at the Gay Alliance Don't get our newsletter but would like 4/13 LGBT Older Adult Issues at the Webster Library Check out what's to? Contact me with your information at 4/17 Transgender Issues at DePaul PROS [email protected] to be added to happening at: our email list. 4/18 Homeless Provider Network Fair at St. Mary's www.gayalliance.org 4/18 The Changing LGBT Movement at University of Rochester or contact: [email protected] Community Safety 4/18 Safe Schools at Churchville/Chili School Dist On March 24, the LGBT Legal Expo 4/19 LGBT Older Adult Issues at the Rush Public Library drew 41 people. There were eight edu­ 4/19 LGBT Issues for "Gay? Fine By Me" Program at SUNY Geneseo Monday thru Thursday: cational presentations and information 4/20 Transgender Inclusion in Schools at School Without Walls Drop-in hours: 2-6pm on legal, financial and insurance matters 4/20 LGBT Issues in Education at University of Rochester was provided by 13 vendors. During the 4/21 LGBT Youth Issues at Education Conference at SUNY Brockport event, a transgender name change form 4/25 LGBT Youth Issues at St. Joseph's Villa Tuesday Teen Group: was fully completed for one attendee. Ages 13-18: 6-7:30pm Kelly Clark notes, "In future we hope 4/26 LGBT Older Adult Issues at the Henrietta Library to have a legal clinic providing services 4/26 LGBT 101 at Edison H.S. Project Search on the spot, as opposed to an informa­ 4/26 SafeZone Training at SUNY Brockport Special Interest: tional event." 4/26 Transgender Issues at University of Rochester Transgender Youth, The Gay Alliance thanks Wegmans 4/30 Safe Schools at BOCES 2 and Tops for their donations . • Arts/Crafts, Movies, Writing Evaluation of the Month: "The strengths were their enthusiasm and knowledge and shared Special Events: insights on the LGBT subjects covered. This was so much more useful Youth Dances, Day of Silence, Go to: than I ever thought possible." Big Gay Prom, Pool Table, The Empty Closet LGBTQ Youth Library, and Internet Access pages at www. GayAliiance.org to The Empty' Closet is Fun, friendly, safe adults are needed to volunteer find the latest news, seeking a volunteer who their time and talents, providing resources, events! knows and could positive role models, spend a few hours a maybe sharing a talent Friend Empty Closet or skill. month "'putting together Contact Jeanne Gainsburg, News on Facebook the EC website photo Outreach Coordinator and follow us on for an application: galleries. [email protected] Twitter! Call Susan at 244-9030 or 585-244-8640, ext. 14.

Thank You On-line Donors Resource Center

The Gay Alliance would like to acknowledge the following individuals The Gay Alliance Internet Access? who donated to the Agency between April 2-April 19 and noted on the On-Line Resource form that they "were proud to be The Gay Alliance Library acknowledged". Directory (GARO) has internet access available T Anne Proudfire in memory of Martha Jane Brown & Jane Erwin The online community tool during library hours: T Gregory Partridge & Doug Potter T Ann Pindar providing local, statewide and Monday & T Willard Heller T Joel Airy national resources, 24/7 at Wednesday: 6-8pm T Earl & Helen Cohen in memory of Arnie Peg ish www.GayAlliance.org. T Rabbi Amy Sapowith T Steven Jarose & Marvin Ritzenthaler T Gretta Schaefer T Clifford J. Hurley T Robert Kennedy T Charles R. Luke T Ryan Tucker T Jennifer Mary Lloyd in honor of Sue Cowell T Ron Matter T Richard Jackman in memory of Robert Booth & Arnie Pegish T James Graves & Tim O'Connell T Peter Mohr T Ann G. T. Young We greatly appreciate the 59 others who The computers are part of our David Bohnett Cyber Center also donated during this time. 32 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

HIV testing on walk-in basis, Tuesdays, Work http://www.tgender.net; PFLAG Trans­ Wednesdays 1-4pm, provided through NYS­ gender Network http://community.pflag.org/ DOH. Thursdays 1-4pm at Aenon Baptist page.aspx?pid=380; TransActive http://www. Church, 175 Genesee St. transactiveonline.org; The Transitional Male Resources http://www.thetransitionalmale.com/; National Anthony l. Jordan Health Center Prevention & Primary Care Program Center for Transgender Equality http://transe­ Check our monthly and ongoing calendar as well as the community section Provides Medical Case Management, Mental quality.org/; New York Association for Gender Health, Primary Care, HIV Counseling and Test­ Rights Advocacy http://www.nyagra.com/; for more groups and events. For further information, call the Gay Alliance Transgender Aging Network http://forge-for­ at 244-8640 or visit: www.gayalliance.org. And send us your information. ing using the Orasure Rapid Test, Education presentations, and access to other Jordan ser­ ward.org/aging/; Transgender Law Center vices. Prevention & Primary Care is a walk-in http://transgenderlawcenter.org ; Transgender program; no appointments necessary. Office Legal Defense and Education Fund http://trans­ Contact Information: Website: www.acRoches­ hours: Mon.- Fri., 8:30am- 5 pm: extended genderlegal.org/; The Self Made Men http:// BISEXUALITY ter.org. Main Office: 259 Monroe Ave., Roches­ hours on Monday until 8pm. (585) 423-2879; theselfmademen.webs.com/ (please send us ter, NY 14607; Main Phone: 585-545-7200, fax (585) 423-2876. Website: www.jordan­ your favorite sites/groups) ONLINE Health Services After Hours: 585-258-3363; health.org. For more information, call Program Guys Night Out AMBI Los Angeles; American Institute of Bisex­ Case Management After Hours (Lifeline): 585- Director Patrick M. Trevor, (585) 423-2879. Social group for transmen. Third Saturdays, uality (Journal of Bisexuality); Bay Area Bisexual 275-5151; Fax: 585-244-6456. Finger Lakes CDC National STD and AIDS Hotline 1pm, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. tguys­ Network; Bi Cafe; Bi Definition: Milwaukee; Office: 605 W. Washington St., Geneva, NY [email protected] BiNet USA; Bisexual Organizing Project (BOP); 14456,315-781-6303. Southern Tier Office: 1-800-CDC-INFO (800-232-4636) 24 hours a Biversity Boston; Boston Bisexual Women's 122 Liberty St. Box 624, Bath, NY 14810607- day. TTY service: 1-888-232-6348. E-mail Network; ComBine - Columbus, Ohio; Dallas/ 776-9166. The Health Outreach Project: 416 address: [email protected]. WOMEN Fort Worth Bi Net; Fenway Health's Bi Health Central Ave., Rochester, NY 14605; 585-454- Fair Housing Enforcement Project Highland Hospital Breast Imaging Center Program; Los Angeles Bi Task Force; New York 5556. of Monroe County 500 Red Creek Drive, Rochester 14623; 585- Area Bisexual Network; Robyn Ochs's site; 487-3300. Specializing in breast health, diag­ Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley 585-325-2500; 1-800-669-9777. Deals with Seattle Bisexual Women's Network; The Bi housing discrimination on basis of race, orien­ nostic breast imaging and treatment and Writers Association; The Bisexual Resource Referrals to physicians and service agencies. mammography outreach and education. (585) 244-8640; www.gayalliance.org. tation, HIV status, etc. Center (email [email protected]) Breast Cancer Coalition of Rochester Victory Alliance Public Interest law Office of Rochester 80 St. Paul St., Suite 701. Free legal services 840 University Ave.; 585-473-8177; www. CULTURAL University of Rochester Medical Center. One of bccr.org; email: [email protected]. Breast Cancer several research sites worldwide that comprise to HIV positive persons, families. Spanish bilin­ Rochester Women's Community Chorus gual advocates available. All civil cases except Coalition provides support services that include the HIV Vaccine Trials Network. Rochester site programs designed to help those coping with a 234-4441. (See Ongoing calendar). conducts research vaccine studies sponsored divorce; no criminal cases. Ask to speak to someone in PILOR. 454-4060. recent breast cancer diagnosis and those cop­ by National Institutes of Health (NIH). 585-756- ing with an advanced breast cancer diagnosis, DEAF SERVICES 2329; www.vaccineunit.org. Evergreen Health Services, Buffalo such as the Advanced Breast Cancer Support Advocacy for Abused Deaf Victims Threshold Primary care, HIV and family care, HIV testing Group to support women living with metastatic Mailing address: c/o ASADV, P.O. Box 20023, At The Community Place, 145 Parsells Ave., and counseling. (716) 847-0328 breast cancer. Information about breast cancer, Rochester, NY 14602. 24-Hour Hotline: ASAD­ third floor, 585-454-7530. Provides confiden­ Westside Health Services lending library, a monthly educational program. [email protected]; VP: 866-936-8976; TTY/ tial HIV, STD testing and General Health Care, Brown Square Health Center, 175 Lyell Ave. All BCCR programs, support services free. FAX: 585-232-2854. ages 12-25. Sliding fee scale, no one denied, (254-6480); Woodward health Center, 480 Monroe County Women's Health lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf most insurances accepted. Mon., Wed., Fri. Genesee St. (436-3040). HIV/AIDS services, Partnership (lRAD) 9am-5pm; Tues., Thurs., 9am-7pm; Sat. support, more. 111 Westfall Rd., Rochester NY 14692; (585) 1Oam-2pm. wwwThresholdCenter.org Meets second Saturdays, 6-9pm. For location, McCree McCuller Well ness Center at 274-6978. Comprehensive breast cancer information: [email protected] Center for Health and Behavioral Training Unity Health's Connection Clinic screening services for uninsured and underin­ Spectrum lGBTIQ & Straight Alliance of Monroe County (585) 368-3200, 89 Genesee St., Bishop sured women. RIT/NTID student group.

www.facebook.com/L.O.R.A.14464; Website: www.l-o-r-a.com Womyn's Drum Circle Ongoing Calendar Fourth Fridays. 6-9:30pm, GAGV Youth Center; E-mail: [email protected]; Website: www.womynsdrumcircle.org. New Freedom New Happiness MONDAY AA Gay meeting, 7pm, Unitarian Church, Occupy Rochester 220 Winton Rd. Men and women. Open. SATURDAY M-F, 4-6 pm, at the Liberty Pole. Support Group for Parents who have lost Rochester Rams Bar Night Born That Way Children Third Saturdays, 8pm-2am, Bachelor Forum, Formerly 3rd Presbyterian LGBT Support Group. First, 3rd Wednesdays, 11am-12:30pm, 670 University Ave. 271-6930 First, 3rd Mondays, 7:30-9:30pm, 34 Meigs St. Third Presbyterian Church, 4 Meigs St. Gene­ Rochester Trans Group see Region Home Care. Free. 325-1880 Carol, 482-3832 or Kaara, 654-7516. Social/educational group for gender-variant Lilac Squares COAP people, friends. Last Saturdays, 3-5 pm, GAGV Gay Square Dance Group, Mondays, 7pm, Come Out and Play. Wednesday game nights. Youth Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. TUESDAYS Narcotics Anonymous 140 Alex Bar. To reserve space: 467-6456; 8-11 pm. Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. Frontrunners/Frontwalkers [email protected]. 7pm, [email protected]. 6-7:30pm. AIDS and Recovery 1124 Culver 9am, George Eastman House parking lot.www. Road (Covenant United Methodist Church) This Free syphilis testing Rochester Rams General Meeting rochesterfrontrunners .org. is an NA meeting that is open to all addicts who AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave., 5-8pm. 442- 2nd Wednesdays, 7:30pm, Bachelor Forum, have a desire to stop using. Although it is not 670 University Ave. wwwJochesterrams.com Empire Bears Potluck 2220. 2nd Saturdays, Gay Alliance Youth Center, 875 specifically a gay-oriented meeting, it is wel­ coming to people of all sexual orientations and Rochester Historical Bowling Society Brothers Keeper E. Main, first floor, Prince St. entrance. 6:30pm Support group for men over 30. Third Wednes­ greet; 7pm dinner. Bring dish to pass. www. gender identities, as well as to anyone who is 7:15pm, Mondays. Clover Lanes, affected by HIV and AIDS. 2750 Monroe Ave. (Group is fulL) days, 5:30-7:30pm, MOCHA Center, 107 lib­ empirebears.org. erty Pole Way. 420-1400 HIV Positive Men's Support group Cross Dresser Support Group WEDNESDAYS Every Monday, 5pm, AIDS Care Center for Pos­ HIV+ Mixed Men's Group First Saturdays, 6-9pm, call for location: Wednesdays, 11 :30 am-12:30 pm. 251-2132; RCDNET@hotmaiLcom New FreedomlNew Happiness Group itive Living, 259 Monroe Ave. AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. Guys Night Out 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. Gay Alliance Youth Drop-In Hours Gay Alliance Youth Drop-In Hours Third Saturdays. Social group for transguys. Bus riders: Take the last #18 University bus to Mondays, Wednesdays, 2-6pm, Gay Alliance Mondays, Wednesdays, 3-7pm, Gay Alliance 1pm, Equal = Grounds, 750 South Ave. tguys­ 12 Corners. Use the stop just past the top of Youth Center, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. Youth Center, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. [email protected]. the hill at Hillside Ave. and before Highland Ave. entrance, first floor. 244-8640, x 13. entrance, first floor. 244-8640 x 13. Or take the #1 Park Ave. to the corner of East Saturday Night Special Gay AA and Winton, then walk five minutes south Frontrunners/Frontwalkers Frontrunners/Frontwalkers 7pm, Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd., S. (uphill) on Winton. This is an open discussion Mondays, 6pm, George Eastman House park­ 6pm, Eastman House parking lot. Men and women. Open meeting. meeting. All issues - as they relate to our alco­ ing lot. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf holism/addiction and recovery - are fair game. Steps Beyond Stems Gay Alliance Library & Archives, David (lRAD) Crack Support Group, Mondays, 7-8pm, Bohnett Cyber Center 2nd Saturdays, 6-9pm. [email protected] FRIDAYS 289 Monroe Ave. Every Wednesday. 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. Sophia's Supper Club Gay Men's Gay Alliance Library & Archives, David First and third Saturdays. http://www.inspiritu­ 7:30pm. Immanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. Bohnett Cyber Center Empire Bears al.biz/ online-spiritual-evolution-gro / • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and Every Monday. 6-8pm. First floor, Every Wednesday. 6pm dinner at The Win­ addicts 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. tonaire. www.empirebears.com • Men's meeting Equality Rochester SUNDAY • Handicapped accessible 2nd Mondays, 7-8:30 pm, Equal=Grounds. Parents Families & Friends of lesbians This is a round-robin discussion meeting. If you 426- 0862; annetischer1 @gmail.com THURSDAY and Gays (PFlAG) are shy about meeting people or speaking up in Presbyterians for lesbian and Gay Third Sundays, 1-3 pm. Open Arms MCC, 740 a group, you will find this meeting particularly Concerns Marshall Rd. 244-8640 ext 27; PFLAG@gayal­ warm and inviting because everyone gets their TUESDAY 6:30pm, first Thursday. Ralph, 271-7649 liance.org. turn to speak (or pass). As a result, this meet­ ing often runs long, so plan on more than the Just Us Guys Gay Alliance Library & Archives, David Queer Radical Reading Group usual hour. Gay men of all ages. 2nd Tuesdays, 6:30pm, First and third Thursdays, 7pm, Bohnett Cyber Center AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. 223-2629 Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. Sunday hours ended. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. Charlie's Group Pride at Work SATURDAYS 2nd Tuesdays. Monthly peer-facilitated support First Thursdays, 5:30pm. 167 Flanders St. Come Out Dancin' Saturday Night Special group for married men who have sex with men. off Thurston Rd. 426-0862. First, Third Sundays. 3-5pm, Friends Meeting­ 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. house, 84 Scio St., entry on Charlotte St. $5. Bus riders: The #18 University Ave. bus does Confidential, free. For time, place: email: char­ GlOB&l (Gays & lesbians of Bausch & [email protected]. lomb). Rochester General Assembly not go by the church on weekend evenings. MOCHA Youth Drop-In Meets every third Thursday in Area 67 confer­ Sundays, Flying Squirrel Community Center, Take the #1 Park Ave. bus to the corner of East Tues.-Fri., 1-9pm, MOCHA Center, ence room at the Optic Center. Voice mail : 285 Clarissa St. and Winton, then walk five minutes south 107 Liberty Pole Way, 420-1400; 244-8640 338-8977 (uphill) on Winton. Unity Fellowship Church • Open meeting, all are welcome, "straight­ MOCHA Hepatitis Clinic Rochester Gay Men's Chorus Sundays, 1:30 pm, Lutheran Church of Peace, friendly" 125 Caroline St., 14620. 520-6188. Free Hepatitis A & B vaccinations, third Tues­ Downtown United Presbyterian Church, • Mixed men and women days, 5:30-7pm, 107 Liberty Pole Way, 420- 121 N. Fitzhugh St. 6:30-9pm, 423-0650 Dignity-Integrity • Handicapped accessible, take elevator to 1400 Free confidential walk-in HIV testing 1st Sunday: 5pm Episcopal Eucharist with basement Women's Community Chorus Every Thursday night, 5-8pm, AIDS Care, music; 2nd Sunday: 5pm Roman Catholic Liturgy Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by Rehearsals each Tuesday, 6:30-9pm, Down­ 259 Monroe Ave. 442-2220 of the Word with music; 3rd Sunday: 5pm Epis­ open discussion. town United Pres. Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh copal Eucharist (quiet); 4th Sunday: 5pm Prayers MOCHA/Gay Alliance Youth Trans Group to start the week, followed by potluck supper. Street. 234-4441, www.therwcc.org First Thursdays, 5-7pm, Gay Alliance Youth SUNDAYS Free HIV Testing Center, 875 E. Main St., 1st floor (Prince St. Open Arms Metropolitan Community Step in the Right Direction entrance). 244-8640 ext 13. Church 7:30-9pm. 1275 Spencerport Road (Trinity Alli­ 9am-7pm. AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. 740 Marshall Rd., Chili, 10:30am, 271-8478 Second Thursdays ance Church) This is an NA meeting that is Social/business networking, 5:30-7:30pm. Gay Men's Alcoholics Anonymous open to all addicts who have a desire to stop WEDNESDAY Changing venues. E-mail: fingerlakes@outand­ St. Luke's/St. Simon Cyrene Church, using. Although it is not specifically a gay-ori­ ented meeting, it is welcoming to people of all Country Line DancinglTwo Stepping equaLorg 17 S. Fitzhugh St. 8:30pm, 232-6720, Weekly. Closed meeting sexual orientations and gender identities. Each Every Wednesday, 140 Alex, 7pm. Lessons fol­ week features a reading from NA literature, fol­ lowed by dancing until 1Opm, Beginners to Rainbow SAGE lowed by discussion. advanced. FRIDAY First Sundays: Euchre Club, 3-6pm. Third Sun­ Gay Men's AA meeting days, Potluck at First Universalist Church, 150 Rochester Gay Men U.R. Pride Network Fridays, 7:30-8:30pm, Closed meeting. 8pm. St. Luke/St. Simon's Episcopal Church, 7:30pm, Gamble Room in Rush Rhees Library. S. Clinton Ave., 4pm. Emmanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. 17 S. Fitzhugh Street. Bus riders use the urpride@gmaiLcom Men's Cooking Group GlBTQI Motorcycle Group Third or fourth Sundays, 355-7664. Fitzhugh Street stop on Main Street at the Coun­ Rainbow SAGE Ruby Slippers Second Fridays, 5:30pm, Various locations. ty Office Building and walk south one block. Wednesdays, 5:45 pm, Callan-Harris Physical [email protected]; 467- Civil Rights Front • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and Therapy, 1328 Universty Ave. 6456; [email protected]. Every Tuesday, 5pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South addicts Ave. http://www.civilrightsfront.wordpress.com Gay Alliance Board of Directors l.O.R.A. Potluck & Games Night • Men's meeting Meets Third Wednesdays, 6pm, • NOT handicapped accessible Fourth Fridays. GAGV Youth Center, 875 E. Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by 875 E. Main St. 244-8640 Main St., 1st floor 6-9:30pm, 585-313-3037; E-mail: [email protected] . Facebook: http:// open discussion.

«• •• a Roman Catholic parish in downtown St. Mary's Catholic Church Rochester that is welcomin~ 15 St. Mary's Place "--.f to all." Howe & Bassett l. 585-232-7140 .~ Professional Plumbers Since 1885 www.stmarysrochester.org Liturgies: 271-4040 Saturday: 4pm; Sunday: 1O:30am 34 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012

TUESDAY 15 Empty Closet deadline for June issue. 244-9030; [email protected]. WEDNESDAY 16 Rochester Rams general meeting. 7:30 pm, Bachelor Forum, 670 University Ave. THURSDAY 17 IDAHO. International Day Against Classified ads are $5 for the first 30 words; each additional 10 words is another Homophobia. www.homophobiaday.org. THURSDAY 3 $1. We do not bill for classifieds, so please send or bring ad and payment to: The Rainbow SAGE on the Road. Informa­ FRIDAY is Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605. Paying by tion meetings for LGBT seniors. Chili Pub­ Gaga Prom: Born This Way. 7-11 pm, check: checks must be made out to Gay Alliance or GAGV. The deadline is the 15th lic Library, 1-2 pm. Cathedral Room, 4th floor, 875 E. Main St. of the month, for the following month's issue. We cannot accept ads over the FRIDAY 4 Tickets $10 in advance, $15 at door. Youth phone. Pay when you place your ad. We will accept only ads accompanied by name 13-23 only. [email protected]; 244- Rainbow SAGE on the Road. Mendon and phone number. Neither will be published, but we must be able to confirm 8640 ext 13. Public Library, 1-2 pm. Rainbow SAGE on the Road. Brock­ placement. The Empty Closet is not responsible for financial loss or physical injury In Motion. Dances by local choreogra­ port Public Library, 10:30-11:30 am. that may result from any contact with an advertiser. Advertisers must use their pher James Hansen, Buffalo choreographer Rochester Rams Can-Am Weekend. own box number, voice mail, e-mail or personal address/phone number. Melanie Aceto. 7:30 pm, Tango Cafe, 389 Through May 21. Welcoming the Spear­ Gregory St. $10. head of Toronto, Canada. Franny Queen of Provincetown. Rain­ ANNOUNCEMENTS in your residence. Reasonable rates. Dis­ bow Theatre Festival, presented by Bread & SATURDAY 19 Household donations wanted for cretion appreciated and practiced. Don't Water Theatre, May 4-5, 8 pm, May 6, 2 Pride Agenda Spring Dinner. Recep­ Open Arms Metropolitan Community delay, call me today at 585-773-2410 (cell) pm. 243 Rosedale, off Monroe. tion 5:45 pm; dinner, program 7 pm. Church offsite garage sale. Clean your or 585-235-6688 (home) or e-mail me at: SUNDAY 6 Rochester Riverside Convention Center. cupboards for a good cause. Call Anne at [email protected]. 917-522-3403; [email protected]. 426-0862 to arrange drop offs or pickups. ComeoutDancin'. Friends Meeting­ Interior painting/wall repair by Latina Health Event. AIDSCare, 259 No clothing please. Sale is Fri. May 11 & house, 84 Scio St. 3-5 pm. Admission $5. John Walsh. 25 years experience, neat, Monroe Ave. 8:30 am-I pm. 210-4189. Sat. May 12 from 9 am - 4pm at 3 Ross­ [email protected] or call 585- clean, efficient. Booking now for spring/ more St. 14606 (off Lyell Ave in Gates). 244-8640. SUNDAY 20 summer. Call to arrange estimate. 585- Rainbow SAGE Euchre. 3 pm. South "Head Out On The Highway." Roch­ PERSONALS 454-2808. Wedge Planning Committee Building, 224 ester Gay Men's Chorus Spring Fling benefit. Politically progressive Lesbian Martin Ippolito master electrician. Mt. Hope Ave. 4-8 pm, Artisan Works, 565 Blossom Rd. Women Seniors interested in RPO con­ Electrical work, telephone jacks, cable Dignity Integrity. Episcopal Mass/Heal­ ComeoutDancin' at Friends Meeting­ certs, Erie Canal walks, bird watching; TV, burglar alarm systems, paddle fans. ing Service, with music. 5 pm, St. Luke's/St. house, 84 Scio St. 3-5pm. Admission $5. news and current affairs conversation, call 585-266-6337. Simon's Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. [email protected] or call 585- Cat 585-732-7149. World renowned weddings. 42 years MONDAY 7 244-8640. SERVICES performing same sex commitments, now Dignity Integrity. Quiet Episcopal Rainbow SAGE on the Road. Phyllis Rochester's Best Man to Man marriages (it's about time!). Nancy BB Mass in the Chapel. 5 pm, St. Luke's/St. Wheatley Library, 1-2 pm. Rubdown. Unwind with this degreed, Meyer minister, God is Love-Animals are Simon's Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. employed, fit, friendly, healthy, Italian Angels ministry. 585-733-6213. TUESDAYS Rainbow SAGE potluck. 3:30 pm, GWM. Middle aged, 5'8", 165 lbs., 32" Treat yourself to a very soothing, Rainbow SAGE on the Road. Maple­ First Universalist Church, 150 South Clin­ waist, nonsmoker, d & d free, HIV nega­ relaxing massage by a licensed massage wood Public Library, 1-2 pm. ton. tive. My lO-plus years experience guar­ therapist. Massage reduces stress and can Equality & Justice Day, Albany. Lob­ THURSDAY 24 antees your relaxation and satisfaction. enhance your wellbeing. Convenient cen­ bying for GENDA, workshops, rally, etc. "Nazi Persecution of Homosexuals Hotel visit, in call in my home or out call trallocations. Call John at 585-314-0197. www.prideagenda.org. 1933-1945" opens at JCC, 1200 Edgewood THURSDAY 10 Ave. Talk by Rabbi David Horowitz: "How Rainbow SAGE on the Road. Winton to be a straight ally." Rochester Gay Men's Rd. Library, 1:30-2:30 pm. Chorus, dessert reception, 7 pm. For full Out & Equal Networking. 5:30-7:30 event listing see page 17. pm, 140 Alex Bar & Grill. SATURDAY 26 FRIDAY 11 Rochester Trans Group. Planning for Garage Sale benefiting Open Arms Pride. 3-5:30 pm, GAGV Youth Center, Metropolitan Community Church. Also 875 E. Main St., first floor. May 12, 9 am to 4 pm, 3 Rossmore St Butch Femme Connection. T aku­ 14606 (off Lyell Ave in Gates). Call 426- mi Japanese Steak House, Jefferson Rd., 0862 to donate items. Henrietta. 7 pm. (585) 288-7208, Dressy­ SATURDAY 12 [email protected], Facebook page http:// SafeZone training. 9:30 am-noon, Gay www.facebook.com/bfconnection. Alliance Youth Center (875 E. Main St., SUNDAY 27 first floor). Training fee $10 per person. No Dignity Integrity. Evening Prayer, fol­ registration necessary. Please contact Jeanne lowed by Picnic in the Park. 5 pm, St. Gainsburg at [email protected] or Luke's/St. Simon's Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh 585-244-8640 ext. 14. St. Butch Femme Connection. Monte Harvey Milk Day. Celebrate his life Alban Mexican Restaurant, E. Ridge Rd., and work! Irondequoit. 7 pm. (585) 288-7208, email WEDNESDAY 30 [email protected] or Facebook page Out & Equal Panel Discussion. "Work http://www.facebook.com/bfconnection . It OUT." 6:30-8:30 pm, EFP Rotenberg SUNDAY 13 LLP, 280 Kenneth Dr., RSVP by May Dignity Integrity. Special Service, with 24. www.oeNYfingerlakes.groupsite.com or music. 5 pm, St. Luke's/St. Simon's Church, www.facebook.com>Out & Equal NY fin­ 17 S. Fitzhugh St. ger Lakes . •

Financial Planning

[email protected] Ka Conhead CFp® ~ advic~ for the www.aproposfp.com Y Y, LGBT commumty from Phone: (585) 533-1950 Fee-only one of your own!

Susan SanFilippo, C.S.W. 234-3561 Counseling & Psychotherapy - Why can't life be fair? -g I change, llJill,try partner? - W'hat effict does my past have on me? - W'bat can I do about myfuture? Individual and couples therapy (sliding fee s c ale) 500 Helendale Road, Suite 155, Rochester N.Y. 14609 MAY 2012 • NUMBER 456 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET 35

FREE Home* Staging 's BEd & BREAkfAST by Greg Fox consultation with all WHOA. THIS COUI-DN'T NOT THE SAME 60"1FRIE.ND BIGGeST SCI-FI GEEK? HE"f, listings! POSSIBL.Y BE M"f 60'1- WHO 6AREI-'I KNOWS HOW ::e'M NOT ,-HE ONe WHO FRIEND CAI-L-ING ME 10 USE A CE.LL. PHONE ... W6NT -r0 -rHE S'-AR'TReK Chris Del Conte ON HIS CE.LL PHONE, CON IN FULl- STAR ~~:ooO----\ COUL.D IT?--- FLEET UNIFOR.M ... DelConte Services, LLC Realtor, RE/MAX Realty Group Interior Design and Home Staging 585.750.0876 [email protected] http://facebook.com/cdelconte

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II'S BeAUTIFUl-. :I'M ... L-OOKS A I-ITTL..E L..IKE RIGHT OUT51PE M'I HORTI/PORT HARBOR) HOTEL ... I-OOKING DOESN'T IT? Ai ENGLISH SAY.

PFLAG meets the 3rd Sunday of each month. Meetings are a Open Arms Metropolitan Communit Church, 740 Marshall Road, Rochester 14624 from 1 to 3pm. Join us! Questions? Call: 585-244-8640 and leave a message, or e-mail: [email protected] WEL..I-) IF :t'M HOT) THEN 'THIS IS ONE FReAKIN' SPECTACULAR HOI-ODECK SIMUL-ATION.

DA\lE,:r KNOW::!. BLEW :r CAN'"T WHAT A60UT MEFL'IIN' TI-IIS .HE FIRST TIME :r BE,l-IE,\lE 3,000 MILES TO TRIED TO ASK "fOU, BUT... 'fOU BOUGHT POP THE QUESIION? THAI ONI-'{ MADE ME REALIZE Fl-OWERS· HOW MUCI-I :r: LOVE '(OU. -- ...... Seeking sex in the park? No 10 on you = Automatic Arrest Court Appearances = Public Shame Court Fine =$1,000 Attorney Fees = $2,000

Reputation +Family + Safety + Peace of Mind

PRICELESS A MAN WHO'S NOT AFRAIO 'TO CAL-L. Me: AN 1010,. :x: "THINK we: GOT A MATCH MADE IN #-lEAVEN HERE ... 585 - 244 - 8640

A Native Rochesterian • with a long family tradition in Real Estate

Need to Talk? I work with individuals and couples on a variety of issues including anxiety, depression, relationship concerns, sexuality & coming out. Maryellen Meleca, LCSW • 14 years experience 2055 Empire Blvd • Rochester, NY 585-305-8457 • [email protected] [email protected] 36 THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 456 • MAY 2012