The Wounded Healer: a Phenomenological Study of the Experiences of Counselors-In-Training with Complex Trauma Histories
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University of Northern Colorado Scholarship & Creative Works @ Digital UNC Dissertations Student Research 11-2019 The Wounded Healer: A Phenomenological Study of the Experiences of Counselors-In-Training With Complex Trauma Histories Jessica Leigh Manson Follow this and additional works at: https://digscholarship.unco.edu/dissertations © 2019 JESSECA LEIGH MANSON ALL RIGHTS RESERVED UNIVERSITY OF NORTHERN COLORADO Greeley, Colorado The Graduate School THE WOUNDED HEALER: A PHENOMENOLOGICAL STUDY OF THE EXPERIENCES OF COUNSELORS-IN-TRAINING WITH COMPLEX TRAUMA HISTORIES A Dissertation Submitted in Partial Fulfillment Of the Requirements for the Degree of Doctor of Philosophy Jesseca Leigh Manson College of Education and Behavioral Sciences Applied Psychology and Counselor Education Counselor Education and Supervision December 2019 This Dissertation by: Jesseca Leigh Manson Entitled: The Wounded Healer: A Phenomenological Study of the Experiences of Counselors-in-Training with Complex Trauma Histories has been approved as meeting the requirement for the Degree of Doctor of Philosophy in the College of Education and Behavioral Sciences in the School of Applied Psychology and Counselor Education, Program of Counselor Education and Supervision. Accepted by the Doctoral Committee Heather Helm, Ph.D., Research Advisor Jennifer Murdock-Bishop, Ph.D., Committee Member Danielle Kahlo, Ph.D., Committee Member Angela Vaughan, Ph.D., Faculty Representative Date of Dissertation Defense Accepted by the Graduate School Cindy Wesley Interim Associate Provost and Dean The Graduate School and International Admission ABSTRACT Manson, Jesseca Leigh. The Wounded Healer: A Phenomenological Study of the Experiences of Counselors-in-Training with Complex Trauma Histories. Published Doctor of Philosophy dissertation, University of Northern Colorado, 2019. Thirty percent of the general population report one or more traumatic experiences (National Council for Community Behavioral Healthcare, 2019), and samples of mental health professionals report rates of traumatic experience as high as eighty percent (Pearlman & Mac Ian, 1995). Research on the neurobiological effects of trauma highlights the possibility of a trauma history uniquely impacting counselors-in-training (CITs) in their professional development and counseling work. This study focused on understanding the experiences of counselors-in-training (CITs) with complex trauma histories. Complex trauma is defined as a form of trauma that is chronic in nature and/or timing- specifically, an event perceived as threatening or deadly that occurs repeatedly to the individual and is often perceived as or is inescapable for that individual (Ford & Courtois, 2013). The symptoms of complex trauma may include those listed above, but also often include neurobiological changes that influence interpersonal symptoms such as withdrawal from social supports, distrust in others or the world, and maladaptive attachment patterns (Perry & Szalavitz, 2006). Across the helping professions (e.g. counseling, social work, psychology, and nursing) researchers have considered the impact of helper trauma history on client care (Ghahramanlou & Brodbeck, 2000; Ortlepp & Friedman, 2005). The correlation between iii trauma history and risk for vicarious trauma, secondary traumatic stress, and burnout has been examined in several studies (Boscarino, Figley, & Adams, 2004; Conrad & Kellar- Guenther, 2006; Ghahramanlou & Brodbeck, 2000; Jenkins, Mitchell, Baird, Whitfield, & Meyer, 2011; Ortlepp & Friedman, 2005).While many researchers hypothesize a connection between a history of trauma and risk for impairment (Jenkins et al., 2011; Michalopoulos & Aparicio, 2012), only a few of the studies show a significant positive correlation between the two. Despite these mixed findings, researchers have not further examined counselors with trauma histories from another lens, and the counselor education and supervision literature does not specifically examine trainees. The literature is currently lacking exploration of such topics as counselors’ perception of their experiences in counselor training as survivors of trauma, their perceived challenges and strengths, and how they believe supervisors can assist them in the process of their development as counselors. In this phenomenological study of counselors-in-training with complex trauma histories, participants (N = 9) described four core groupings of characteristics that define the experience of these CITs: Experiencing Complex Trauma, Healing from Complex Trauma, The Impact of Complex Trauma on the Person of the Counselor, and the Education Experience. In experiencing complex trauma, participants described themes of Trauma is Never Done, Continued Contact with the Trauma System, Trauma and Part of the Personal and Professional Self, Questioning Normalcy and Effectiveness, and Feeling Alone. In Healing from Complex Trauma, participants described Meaning-Making and Attending Individual Counseling. In describing the Impact of Complex Trauma on the Person of the Counselor, participants identified the Desire to Provide Clients What One iv Did/Did Not Receive Emotionally, The Desire to Work with Clients Who Have Experienced Trauma, the Use of a Humanistic Orientation/Humanistic Characteristics in Approach, the Use of or Valuing of a Holistic/Somatic Approach, and Perceptivity/Empathy as Strengths Attributed to Traumatic Experiences. The Education Experience was marked by themes of Interactions with Faculty, Instructors, and Site Supervisors, Interactions with Colleagues, Influential Courses, Influential Assignments, and the sub-grouping of Considering Disclosure. Implications for Counselor Educators include the incorporation of trauma-informed approaches to education and supervision, modeling clear communication and boundaries for trainees, and advocating for CITs with complex trauma histories in the institution. v ACKNOWLEDGMENTS I’ve learned recently that it takes a village to raise a child and a community to finish a dissertation – neither are easy feats and require love, dedication, and perseverance from oneself and the people surrounding them. I’m so thankful for the people who were a part of my journey in helping me to complete this project and earn my PhD – I would not have survived this process without each and every one of you. To my committee, Dr. Jennifer Murdock Bishop, Dr. Danielle Kahlo, and Dr. Angela Vaughan – from the bottom of my heart, thank you. I look up to each of you for different reasons, and being surrounded in this process by a community of strong and authentic women is a privilege. I appreciate the time and intention you put into reviewing my proposal and dissertation and the suggestions each of you made to improve the quality of my work. I’m so grateful to have shared this process and parts of my personal and professional life with each of you. Thank you for guiding me in this journey and modeling to me what it means to be an exceptional educator. To Dr. Heather Helm, my advisor and mentor – thank you for encouraging me to pursue this topic that is so true to my heart. You knew that this would be an enormous undertaking, and your encouragement emboldened me to fight through the emotional and logistical difficulties of the research. Through your attention to detail and insistence on a quality product, you helped me to create a dissertation that I am truly proud of. I can’t count the number of times I arrived to your office flustered and overwhelmed to leave feeling refreshed and determined thanks to your guidance and genuine kindness. Thank you, thank you, thank you! vi To my colleagues who were elemental in my personal and professional process. Michael, Dave, and Sav, I wouldn’t have survived the last four years without you – The multitude of coffee and dinner dates, hours writing, more hours discussing ideas, and relentless encouragement of pursuing what is true to our hearts made my doctoral experience what it is. Thank you for always being in the arena with me. Your feedback will always mean the most. To my research team, Savannah and Evan, thank you for helping me to ensure a quality product. The time and intention each of you put into this research speaks volumes about your care for the participants and doing justice to a topic that is so important to me. Sav, I’m so lucky to have a fellow researcher on this project who values this topic so much. It was truly wonderful to share the coding process with you. Ev, thank you for being you. It was a blessing to have an auditor with whom I could confidently share very vulnerable pieces of myself. Thank you for holding that information close and providing me authentic and challenging feedback to incorporate into the research process. To the participants of this study - Penelope, Daisy, Grace, Hallie, Angie, Miriam, Katie, Clark, and Jack: Thank you for your courage in coming forward to share your experiences. You are the true advocates for other counselors of similar backgrounds, and without telling your stories, I could not begin this work. I hope that I have given voice to your experiences in a way that advocates for you and other counselors-in-training with complex trauma histories, and that the results of your interviews will inspire innovations in the practices of Counselor Educators. To my mom. I am relentless, strong, kind, authentic, and loving because I am a reflection of you. Every degree I was convinced that I couldn’t achieve, you were there, vii adding on another job to help pay for my tuition and reminding