Page 4 Thursday, February 11, 1999 The Westfield Leader and THE TIMES of Scotch Plains – Fanwood A WATCHUNG COMMUNICATIONS, INC. PUBLICATION The Westfield Leader THE TIMES POPCORN of Scotch Plains – Fanwood — Established 1890 — — Established 1959— Shes All That: The Official Newspaper of the Town of Westfield Official Newspaper of the Borough of Fanwood and the County of Union and the Township of Scotch Plains Andy Hardy Gets Jiggy With It Member of: Member of: By Michael S. Goldberger New Jersey Press Association New Jersey Press Association National Newspaper Association National Newspaper Association One Popcorn, Poor • Two Popcorns, Fair • Three Popcorns, Good • Four Popcorns, Excellent BURLESQUE Westfield Area Chamber of Commerce Scotch Plains Business & Professional Association 2 popcorns whistle that only Fido and Fluffy can Prepare yourself for the bare facts Periodicals – Postage Paid at Westfield, New Jersey Periodicals – Postage Paid at Scotch Plains, New Jersey on burlesque, a word with an ety- P.O. Box 250 • 50 Elm Street P. O. Box 368 • 1906 Bartle Avenue Mirror, mirror on the wall, whos the hear. Variation on a theme though Shes geekiest high school girl of them all? mological rating that ranges from Westfield, N.J. 07091 All That may be, its THEIR variation on Scotch Plains, N.J. 07076 Though hippie throwback Laney Boggs a theme, their identifying harbinger of GP to X and beyond, depending Tele: (908) 232-4407 • E-mail: [email protected] • Web: www.goleader.com • Fax: (908) 232-0473 (Rachael Leigh Cook), the only bohe- youth. Respect must be paid. on which of its several meanings you POSTMASTER: Send address changes to the offices of the newspapers at mian residing in tres upscale Pacific Making this motion picture pilgrim- elect to infer. Palisades, California, doesnt ask that age with my 13-year-old daughter, Erin, P. O. Box 250, Westfield, New Jersey 07091 The French borrowed burlesque question in Shes All That, shell be the I naturally want to come across non- from the Italian word, burlesco, PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY BY WATCHUNG COMMUNICATIONS, INC. first to tell you it is she. judgmental and hip (...or is it hep this go- which in turn was derived from their The nonconformist takes pride in her round?). So I try not to wince when the word, burla, for jest, joke or mock- Horace R. Corbin Paul J. Peyton nerdism. So its easy to understand why handful of sexual innuendoes begin fly- this artistic ragamuffin is extra-suspi- ing. Gosh, wasnt it just yesterday we ery. PUBLISHER Gail S. Corbin MANAGING EDITOR One form of burlesque is a GENERAL MANAGER cious when Zack Siler (Freddie Prinze, reviewed The Little Mermaid? Suzette F. Stalker David B. Corbin Jr.), the wealthy burgs No. 1 chick mag- I furtively glance at Erin to judge her vaudeville-like show characterized ASSISTANT EDITOR Michelle H. LePoidevin SPORTS net, comes a courtin in this typical reaction to one scene. Is that lipstick by wild comedy, dancing, and nu- Joanna B. Marsh REPORTER Karen M. Hinds teenploitation rehash directed by Robert shes wearing? But I count my blessings. dity. MARKETING DIRECTOR OFFICE MANAGER Iscove. No nose ring or rebellious tattoo that says This form of entertainment, which Nonplused by the Adoniss sudden Vic. At least not yet. But hey, whose SUBSCRIPTION PRICE was also known as burleycue or attentions, she asks, Is this some kind of rite of passage movie experience is this burly, has now almost completely One-year subscription in county – $20 • Out-of-county – $24 • One-year college (September to May) – $16 dork outreach program? supposed to be anyway? The self-imposed wallflower is per- Bottom line: how entertaining Shes disappeared in the United States. A fectly right in mistrusting the straight-A All That is will depend on your perspec- lesser known legitimate meaning of student and standout athlete. There is an tive, more or less. the word burlesque is a treatment Ticketing of Westfield Jaywalkers of a serious dramatic or literary work ulterior motive, and Laneys the goat. * * * * * What we other teenagers know and she Shes All That, rated PG-13, is a that makes it appear ridiculous. Is a Symptom of Other Problems doesnt is that Zack has just been given Miramax Films release directed by Rob- Finally, burlesque can mean a the gate by Taylor Vaughn (Jodi Lynn ert Iscove and stars Freddie Prinze, Jr., ludicrous or mocking imitation, a OKeefe), his vampish female counter- First there was Operation Desert Storm. Then, there the piper for such petty acts as not using a crosswalk, Rachael Leigh Cook, and Matthew favorite device used by comedians part. Lillard. Running time: 87 minutes. and thats a laugh. was Operation Desert Shield. Now, cut to 1999 putting change in the meter over the two-hour limit, or, It seems the ultra-obnoxious Miss Operation Jaywalker is underway. on occasion, feeding geese at Mindowaskin Park. And Popular and prom queen shoe-in is now keeping company with the equally nar- GUEST COLUMN Oh yes, the battle has begun on how to lessen the the Westfield Police Department should not be un- cissistic Brock Hudson (Matthew risks to pedestrians in Westfield following the death of fairly pushed into a corner by reactionary officials. Lillard), a humorously clueless would- be actor who regularly appears in a sa- Local School Board Membership: a woman just weeks ago in a crosswalk. With BRAKES This portrays an untrue and morose image. tirically pseudo version of the MTV show, (Bikers, Runners and Kids are Entitled to Safety) An image, we might add, that the Downtown Real World. Leaders Needed For New Millennium pushing for enforcement of speeding laws and stop- Westfield Corporation (DWC) believes is so impor- Per the unwritten rule of love which applies only to teen-agers and soap opera ping motorists who move through crosswalks with tant they are buying a full page paid advertisement in characters, for every action that hurts, Editors Note: The following is an the budget, negotiates employee con- people still in them, the town leaders have evidently an upcoming issue of New Jersey Monthly, at a cost of there must be an opposite and equally informative column regarding school tracts, approves the hiring of teachers, roused the police to ticket everything that moves or $2,500, just to promote the town state-wide. In fact, a hurting reaction. Thus, in an uncharac- board membership from the President of administrators and other staff, and sets teristic bit of bravado meant to save face, the New Jersey School Boards Associa- policies on curriculum and facilities. crawls. third of the DWCs 1999 spending plan of $281,320, good guy Zack bets his friend Dean (Paul tion. Whatever issue the board is considering, A warning to geese: the next time you leave a nearly $100,000, is being budgeted just for promo- Walker as the obligatory, blond-haired By CHARLES V. REILLY the individual board member should keep dropping, you too could be fined. Just ask a jaywalker. tional efforts. snake-in-the-grass) that, solely via his Specially Written for The Westfield Leader and The Times in mind the goal of maintaining the high- And you meter feeders, dont think you are off the We admit, though, that the police did open our eyes popularity, he can turn any girl into a A recent CNN/USA Today/Gallup Poll est quality of education possible. prom queen. asked Americans what they believe is What are the requirements to be a hook. And if your lawn is not cut, watch out for the to the jaywalking law. The current statute dates back In a plot that doesnt much stand on the nations top priority. The number one board member? Maintenance Code. THEY are coming for you next. to 1951. That law states that pedestrians must cross at ceremony, thats just when Laney hap- issue cited more often than healthcare Candidates must be able to read and This may seem as though we are poking fun at the the walkways. It also states that when a pedestrian is pens to walk by, frumpish and rumpled or Social Security was education. write English; they must have lived in the as they come the perfect challenge to Its an exciting time for education in school district for at least a year; they ticketing frenzy that is going on in Westfield. But, the halfway across the street and the light changes, traffic Zacks Pygmalion-minded boast. Agreed; New Jersey. Whether its a program may not have an interest in, contract with bottom line is Westworld is developing a reputation must stop and let the individual proceed. shell be the unwitting sows ear. proposed in Trenton or legislation sub- or legal claim against the local school of being an unfriendly community. Its never been that The basic threat to quality of life in Westfield, as is Problem is, in order to foster this mitted in Washington, D.C., Garden State board; and they must be registered to Cinderella tale, the age-old stereotype residents can expect to see new ideas, vote. way before, and it should not be that way now. In our the situation in many other New Jersey towns, in- calls for a hopelessly ugly duckling to new construction, new curriculum and There are also some key intangibles. view, with the direction in which things appear to be volves too many cars, too much traffic and too many shed her eyeglasses and then wow us simply a stronger focus on education. Its a lot of work, and theres no question headed, and with other plans on the books, matters will callous drivers.