The Tree of Life Cycle 2018
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THE TREE OF LIFE CYCLE A Guideline to Life Cycle Events and Current Customs at Tree of Life Congregation 2018 2 TOL LIFE CYCLE CONTENTS 1. Introduction 2. Tree of Life Vision Statement 3. Shabbat 4. Welcoming a Child Into the Covenant & Babynaming Ceremonies a. What is a Covenant Ceremony? b. What is a Brit Milah ceremony for boys? c. What is a Hachnasat Bat LeBrit ceremony for girls? d. How do I prepare for a covenant ceremony? e. What are the options for a covenant ceremony for a boy baby? f. When should a covenant ceremony take place? g. What is a private covenant ceremony? h. What is a public covenant ceremony? 5. Consecration a. What is Consecration? b. Who is consecrated? c. When is Consecration? 6. Bar Mitzvah and Bat Mitzvah a. What is a Bar Mitzvah? b. What is a Bat Mitzvah? c. What is a Bar/Bat Mitzvah service? d. Who is eligible for a Bar/Bat Mitzvah service? e. When is the date for a Bar/Bat Mitzvah service scheduled? f. How does a student prepare to become a Bar/Bat Mitzvah? g. Are there any fees associated with the Bar/Bat Mitzvah process? h. What happens after I become a Bar/Bat Mitzvah? 7. Confirmation a. What is Confirmation? b. When is the Confirmation Service? c. What is the Confirmation Class Trip? 8. Weddings a. When may a Jewish wedding take place? b. What is Kiddushin? c. How does a couple prepare for a wedding? d. Where do Jewish weddings take place? e. Who officiates at a Jewish wedding? f. What is a ketubah? 3 g. What is a chuppah? h. What takes place in a Jewish wedding? i. What is traditional Jewish music for a wedding? j. What is an aufruf? k. What do I do for an interfaith wedding ceremony? l. What is the Tree of Life Congregation’s attitude towards same-sex wedding ceremonies? 9. Conversion a. Is conversion allowed in Judaism? b. How does one convert to Judaism at the Tree of Life? 910 Chanukat HaBayit – Home Dedication a. What is a Chanukat HaBayit ceremony? b. What is a mezuzah? 11 Preparing for Death a. What should I do as the death of a loved one approaches? b. Is there a Jewish funeral home in Columbia? c. Is pre-planning encouraged? d. What is the Jewish belief concerning organ donation? 12. At the Time of Death a. What are the first steps to take after the death of an immediate family member? b. When is a Jewish funeral usually held? c. Where is a Jewish funeral service held? d. Is there a Jewish cemetery in Columbia? e. How are Jews traditionally buried? f. What about cremation? g. What about autopsy? h. What is the Chevra Kaddisha? 123 The Jewish Funeral a. What is the purpose of the Jewish funeral? b. What is keriah? c. Are there flowers at a Jewish funeral? d. Are open caskets permitted during the funeral service? e. Who may serve as pallbearers? f. Why do we conclude a funeral service with the placing of earth over the casket? g. What happens after the funeral? 14. Jewish Mourning Practices a. What is shiva? b. What is a Shiva Minyan? c. What do I do on Shabbat during shiva? d. What is sheloshim? e. What is an unveiling ceremony? 4 f. How do I purchase a plaque for the Memorial Boards in the sanctuary? g. How do I mark a yahrzeit? h. What is Yizkor? 15. Suggested Reading List 5 INTRODUCTION This Guideline outlines the current customs and practices at Tree of Life Congregation. It does not begin to describe all the many ways to celebrate life cycle events, nor does it try to answer everyone’s questions about their lifecycle events. We strongly encourage everyone to discuss their lifecycle events with the Rabbi as early as possible. We have included a suggested reading list that can point you to different Jewish observances and their origins. This Guideline does give you the basic “house traditions” that we at Tree of Life have developed over the years. For centuries, each synagogue has developed its own “minhag hamakom” or web of individual customs. These are ours and we invite you to join in them. This Guideline is for everyone who might like to share their Jewish life with the Tree of Life family or simply make use of our facilities. We welcome new members of our congregation, those who are considering joining us, and wish to give them a sense of what we have to offer. Those who have been with us for a while may not yet have celebrated a particular life cycle event at Tree of Life and may need to learn what is expected and who does what. Many of these guidelines have grown over the years, authored by Tree of Life rabbis, officers, teachers and members. The Tree of Life Ritual Committees have gathered together our existing customs and practices and have “filled in the blanks” where needed. This has been an ongoing task over the years and this document represents the current thinking. As a member of the Union for Reform Judaism, the Tree of Life Rabbi generally follows the Central Conference of American Rabbis (CCAR) guidelines for worship and various lifecycle events. We encourage people seeking further information to contact the Tree of Life Rabbi and to search the URJ’s website at www.reformjudaism.org. We hope you find these Guidelines useful and welcome any comments and suggestions you may have for future editions. Original Ritual Participants in Participants in Participants in Committee 2001 Revision 2005 Revision 2014 Revision Jeanette Birch Claire Boxt Cheri Alexander Richard Cohen Irene Fields Norma Higgins Eleanor Bornstein Terry Garber Terry Garber Sally Hein Langer Nancy Cartiff David Greenhouse Jonathan Leader Deborah Ritter Jennifer Stein Steve Savitz Rabbi Sanford Marcus Ruth Zackowitz Hartman Risa Straus Rabbi Daniel Sherman Jennifer Mykytyn Arline Polinsky Steve Savitz 6 Participants in 2016 Revision Alice Kasakoff Adams Jessica Elfenbein David Greenhouse Josh Gupta-Kagan Rabbi Linda Joseph Steve Savitz 7 TREE OF LIFE VISION STATEMENT In May 1997, Tree of Life Congregation adopted the following Vision Statement. It describes the congregation as it would like to be – as we would like to see ourselves and hope others will see us. In our devotion to God, the Tree of Life Congregation will be recognized as a synagogue that fully meets the needs of the Reform Jewish Community of the Midlands of South Carolina by: ● Offering pathways for individuals to grow closer to God; ● Providing a welcoming and inclusive atmosphere for those observing Reform Judaism, and their families, partners, and others; ● Developing a comprehensive, life-long Jewish education program embodying meaningful, stimulating experiences for all ages; ● Preserving and celebrating Reform Jewish culture and identity; ● Cultivating the leadership potential of each congregant; ● Enjoying ample financial resources to sustain the TOL vision, while exercising fiscal responsibility and sound business practices; ● Serving as a source of strength and support for each other in times of need; ● Working as advocates for Reform Judaism in the community-at-large; ● Demonstrating Jewish consciousness through empathy and social action. 8 THE RELIGIOUS CUSTOMS and LIFE CYCLE BOOK SHABBAT The Sabbath is the weekly holiday central to Jewish life. Shabbat is an integral part of the Creation story in Genesis 2:1-3: "The heaven and earth were finished, and all their array. On the seventh day God finished the work which God had been doing, and God ceased [rested] on the seventh day from all the work which God had done. And God blessed the seventh day and declared it holy, because on it god ceased [rested] from all the work of creation which God had done." Shabbat is also the only holiday mentioned in the Ten Commandments, first in Exodus 20:8-11 and later in Deuteronomy 5:12-15. The celebration of Shabbat takes place both privately (at home) and communally (at synagogue). Our Tree of Life community gathers for worship each Shabbat, reaffirming our covenantal tie to God and to one another. Shabbat services take place every Friday night at Tree of Life and on Saturday morning at least once each month. Historically, there has been a Torah service at every Shabbat service (both on Friday night and Saturday morning). Starting in 2016, when there is Saturday morning worship, a talk or sermon will replace the Friday night Torah reading the evening before, moving TOL towards common Reform movement practice. WELCOMING A CHILD INTO THE COVENANT & BABYNAMING CEREMONIES Q: What is a covenant ceremony? We celebrate the birth of every Jewish child. It is a wonderful simcha – a truly joyous occasion. Parents are obligated to bring their children into the Jewish covenant. We do this with a special ceremony of welcoming. For boys, we have a Brit Milah ceremony; for girls, we have a Hachnasat Bat LaBrit ceremony. Q: What is a Brit Milah ceremony for boys? Brit Milah means “the covenant of circumcision.” This is the ceremony at which a Jewish baby boy is welcomed into the Jewish family, entered into our people’s covenant with God, circumcised, blessed, and given his Hebrew name. This ceremony is more than just a babynaming. Q: What is a Hachnasat Bat LaBrit ceremony for girls? Hachnasat Bat LaBrit means “entering a daughter into the Covenant.” This is the ceremony at which a Jewish baby girl is welcomed into the Jewish family, entered into our people’s covenant with God, blessed, and given her Hebrew name. Other names for 9 this ceremony include Brit Bat (Covenant for a Daughter) or Brit Banot Yisrael (Covenant of the Daughters of Israel), or Brit Chayim (Covenant of Life).