THEY COULD SOLVE V 9000 reviews on www.empireonline.com.au V NATURE'S BIGGEST › THE BEST CLASSIC FILMS MYSTERY. OUT NOW ON DVD AND VIDEO IF THEY ONLY (1984) Starring Rae Dawn Chong, Guy Davis, Jon Chardiet Director Stan Lathan HAD A CLUE. Rated TBC Out Now Rent/Buy

PITY POOR 50 CENT: THE WALKING The rarely-seen hologram bicep’s itchy trigger finger would gyro-fart wowed the cubic be made redundant in 1984’s New zirconia convention. York City, where, according to this film, gangs battled with dance moves rather than semi-automatic weapons. The second Hollywood film to cash in on the then popular craze of , Beat Street acts more as a fascinating cultural document of early hip-hop rather than a decently plotted or well acted film. The so-called “four elements” of hip-hop are represented in the central characters: Aspiring MC/DJ Kenny, his breakdancing younger brother Lee and their graffiti artist friend This is undoubtedly dated and flimsy, but Ramon, with the trio embarking on a mission to those after some reasonably ace breakdance get famous off their mad hip-hop skills, yo. battle scenes – and proof that you can actually The film’s main attraction is the appearance wear a racoon’s tail on your head and still look of several founding fathers of hip-hop: Kool cool – will find much to love. Herc, the , DVD EXTRAS None. and Grandmaster & The Furious Five JAMES JENNINGS among the more notable. FILM ))))) EXTRAS ))))) Don Johnson wouldn't escape this time.

THE HIDDEN (1987) Starring Kyle MacLachlan, Michael Nouri Director Jack Sholder Rated MA15+ Out February 5 Rent/Buy KILLER KLOWNS FROM GIVEN HOW CELEBRATED 1980S ACTION car-fancying alien slug that can kids. He did all that in two weeks. the movie its warmth, humour and OUTER SPACE(1988) movies are, it’s astounding that hop from body to body. “He sees If anyone deserves to go that way, even heart. When writer Jim Kouf Starring Grant Cramer, Suzanne Snyder, John Allen Nelson, John Vernon The Hidden remains so under- something he wants, he steals it,” it sure in the Hell was him.” Of gets this formula right, which he Director Stephen Chiodo Rated M Out February 16 Rent/Buy appreciated. Perhaps that’s why Kyle explains. “If something gets in course, the alien inside’s far from did again in 1987 with Stakeout Hollywood hasn’t yet remade it, his way, he kills it. And right now, dead and is soon checking out of and more recently in the first WHILE THERE’S A PERVERSE JOY IN Blanchett: is there any but rest assured that someone, he’s hiding out in your city.” hospital in a new body, which it National Treasure film, the result watching a film named Killer Klowns role she can't play? some day will do just that. Made for just $5m and directed again uses to satisfy its lust for is a lot of fun. He and Sholder From Outer Space, you can be Whether it’d be possible to do a by Jack Sholder, best known for breaking speed limits, fist-in-the- are smart enough to embrace all pretty certain from the outset that better job is debatable, because 1985 sequel A Nightmare On Elm air rock and ultra violence. the clichés of the genres they’re the filmmakers haven’t set out to this blend of car chases, shoot- Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (see The Hidden is A-grade mashing up and then give ’em create the next Daniel Day-Lewis outs, gooey sci-fi, thriller, buddy- page 84), The Hidden rockets adrenaline, with its action and fx a flip. They’re having a laugh Oscar vehicle. Instead, the unholy cop comedy and blasting heavy into action from the opening remarkably fresh 22 years on. But when the alien drives his Ferrari trinity of Chiodo brothers Stephen, metal is about as satisfying as pop frames in which a dude walks what really makes it work is the at two guys carrying a plate of Charles and Edward birthed a tribute moviemaking gets. into a bank, calmly shoots up the fine balance of the serious and glass across a road, but just see to cult ’50s B-grade sci-fi flicks that Borrowing from Alien, The place and people, grabs some tongue-in-cheek, best exemplified where they take it. Same goes for remains faithful to that genre with Thing and The Terminator, but cash and roars off in a Ferrari. in the chemistry between Nouri Hunters & Collectors’ anthemic abominable acting, tragic special anticipating elements of Twin The chase that follows is top and MacLachlan. These two cops Say Goodbye, used here perfectly. effects and a bulimic plot so thin that Peaks, The X-Files and Denzel notch and culminates in the fiery, are as different as you can get, Check it before they wreck it. you can practically hear it throwing Washington horror flick Fallen, bloody spectacle of our perp’s for reasons that aren’t too hard DVD EXTRAS None. up in a toilet cubicle. this has Michael Nouri as a hard- demise. A cop describes the to guess, but the understanding MICHAEL ADAMS The Special School-simple premise revolves face should give you a fair indication of the level nosed LA cop who’s faced with an one-man crime wave’s stats as: and friendship they develop gives FILM ))))) EXTRAS ))))) around grotesque alien Klowns, for reasons of humour on offer. outbreak of homicides committed “He killed 12 people, wounded unknown, landing their Big Top-style spaceship Cult movie fans may find it an interesting by seemingly ordinary citizens 23 more, stole six cars, most of near a small American town to harvest the local curio; everyone else should sit tight until AVAILABLE NOW gone berserk. Kyle MacLachlan them Ferraris, robbed eight banks, IT’S ASTOUNDING THAT THE HIDDEN residents as food (as alien Klowns are wont Fincher does the “alien clown” concept justice. TO RENT OR BUY appears as an FBI agent to lend six supermarkets, four jewellery REMAINS SO UNDER-APPRECIATED to do). There are rare funny moments – the DVD EXTRAS Commentary, deleted scenes, assistance. Turns out that these stores and a candy shop. Six of the Klowns using a balloon dog as a hunting mutt is featurettes. Impressive for this vintage schlock. crimes are being committed ones he killed he carved up with a – AND IT’S DOUBTFUL ANY REMAKE a highlight – but scenes involving popcorn guns, JAMES JENNINGS

HEADPRESS by a rock’n’roll-loving, sports butcher knife. Two of them were COULD BE AS GOOD. bodies wrapped in fairy floss and pies to the FILM ))))) EXTRAS ))))) Strong sexual references and drug use, Coarse 114 EMPIRE M ARCH 2 0 0 9 www.empireonline.com.au www.empireonline.com.au language