WHOA HEY NOW Talking Antiterrorism, He Was Think About Basketball Coach Talking Movies Too

WHOApage HEY 19 NOW Técnica • Friday, April 1, 2002 • 19 Dubya talks Oscars Coach or dictator? The critic-in-chief wasn’t just We don’t really know what to WHOA HEY NOW talking antiterrorism, he was think about basketball coach talking movies too. Paul Hewitt after seeing this. Técnica • Monday, April 1, 2002 In this section Keep reading Clough: “Forget engineering, I wanna dance” Institute President G. Wayne Clough has found his true passion, musical theater, and plans to vacate his Carnegie Building office for the famed title role in Andrew Lloyd Webber’s The Phantom of the Opera. By Dragon Platypus him after he left, and that now to playing this role, and maybe Dramatic Correspondent he has the opportunity to start a my engineering skills will help French domination here at Geor- me, because that chandelier fall- It all started when he wrote gia Tech (but that’s another sto- ing every night can’t be very struc- “A Half Day in the Life of a ry). turally sound,” Clough said. College President,” and now he Anne Clough, the engineer/ The engineering experience dreams of the Great White Way. thespian’s wife was quoted as he alluded to will be a Broadway “I found out that I really liked saying, “I think Wayne’s really first. Never before has a lead in a this theater thing, and finally lost it this time. He was a little major musical come in with three determined that this engineer- out there with the whole ‘writ- degrees in civil engineering. ing stuff is pretty boring,” said The rest of the Phantom cast Tech president G. Wayne Clough was surprised at the news of their in a press conference outlining “Je ne sais pas new teammate. his reasons for leaving the Insti- Jennifer Hughes, who plays tute. pourquoi le Christine in the Broadway show, “I used to think that being a Président est parti said, “I don’t understand what’s triple threat was being able to going on now. I used to act with integrate, differentiate, and de- de l’Institut, mais il Michael Crawford, and now rive, but now my outlook on life me manquera they’re giving me some washed- has totally changed,” said Clough. up college president who prob- “Forget engineering, I wan- après son depart.” ably can’t even sing?” na dance, sing, and act my in- Jean-Lou Chameau Clough resented Hughes’ re- credibly well-educated brains out. Provost marks, stating that his singing Ever since I was a boy growing skills are more than adequate, up in Douglas, I’ve wanted to be and that he’s been practicing for a star, and now I can!” quite some time. Those close to the President- ing my own one act play’ idea, “I am ready, though I’m not cum-Tony hopeful were shocked but he’s totally off his rocker that good at learning new songs. by his announcement. now.” All I really know is Ramblin’ “Je ne sais pas pourquoi le She added, “I don’t want to Wreck and Up with the White Président est parti de l’Institut, move. I like living in the Presi- and Gold,” he said. mais il me manquera après son dent’s House!” “It’s going to be a challenge, depart. Peut-etre, je peux com- For now, it looks like the that’s for sure. But if singing, mencer un domination français Cloughs will be packing up and dancing, and acting in a highly maintenant,” said Provost Jean- heading for Manhattan, where dramatic fashion in front of a Lou Chameau in his native he has already landed the huge paying audience night in and tongue. role of the Phantom in Andrew night out is anything like run- Photo illustration by Ian Clark / STUDENT PUBLICATIONS Roughly translated, Chameau Lloyd Webber’s masterpiece, The ning the technological universi- Institute President G. Wayne Clough is slated to begin his run as the title character expressed his surprise at Clough’s Phantom of the Opera. ty of the 21st century, then I in ‘The Phantom of the Opera’ on April 17 on Broadway. He is making theater departure, that he would miss “I’m really looking forward should have no problem.” history as the first Broadway lead to have three degrees in civil engineering. Crowe upset over Academy Award snub Rockapella singer treated for infection after After being passed over for the Best Actor Oscar for his performance in A Beautiful Mind, being licked by fan at Ferst Center concert Russell Crowe told the Técnica, “I’m bloody pissed at these Academy blokes who wouldn’t By Blah B. Blah pella band, Rockapella performed but unfortunately one of the sing- of the incident and let it go by as know a great performance if it bit them in their Assistant Chief Deputy for a sold out crowd at the Ferst ers, whose name was not released just another unexpected feat of behinds. These are the same fools who don’t Center, an overexcited fan (we’ll call him John Doe), was bizarreness that came with the appreciate my band, 30 Odd Foot of Grunts.” Georgia Tech was the site last charged through the aisles sprung not quite quick enough and suf- fame. Their perspectives were week of an unfortunate incident on stage attempting to lick the fered multiple licks to the front changed however, two days lat- that would change the face of a band members. Four of the five and sides of his face. er on Monday when Doe began Academy caves, awards cappella music forever. Last Sat- singers managed to escape the At first Doe and the rest of complaining of extreme exhaus- Crowe ‘Grouch Oscar’ urday, after hip doo wop a cap- probing of the woman’s tongue Rockapella didn’t think much tion and a violently sore throat. After a trip to the doctor it was The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and confirmed, Doe had contracted Sciences announced yesterday that they will be mono and Rockapella was out a awarding a supplementary “Grouch Oscar” to base man. Russell Crowe in a special ceremony to be held As Rockapella struggled to soon at the Kodak Theatre. Reasons were not find a replacement for their up- disclosed. coming tour dates, Doe’s con- dition worsened. On Tuesday it was confirmed that the strain of Oscar the Grouch leaves mono that the fan had passed on to Doe was a rare and deadly trash can, sues Academy form of the virus which is often Sesame Street’s Oscar the Grouch filed a fatal. defamation of character lawsuit against the Acad- Doe’s survival chances are slim emy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, he and he certainly will never sing said in last night’s press conference. “This make again. The licking woman claims Oscar very mad. Now I go eat more trash,” said that she had no knowledge that Mr. Grouch. she was carrying the deadly virus and is still under investiga- tion for licking with intent to Crowe to make guest harm or kill. The rest of the band has made spot on Sesame Street a promise to Doe that before he The Children’s Television Workshop said dies, they will finally, at long that Russell Crowe will make an appearance on last, catch that wiley Carmen Sesame Street, and will play a sing-along with ByIan Clark / STUDENT PUBLICATIONS Sandiego, and when they do, Bert and Ernie backing up his band, 30 Odd The diseased member of Rockapella exhibits one of the many painful symptoms associated with the they will all relax and sip on Feet of Grunts. The date is yet to be set. strange infection he contracted after one of his fans licked his face Saturday night at the Ferst Center. some fresh Folgers coffee. 20 • Monday, April 1, 2002 • Técnica WHOA HEY NOW Lucas announces sweeping last-minute changes to Episode II By Darth P. Burdell design teams. The kidnappers from liked the character of Jar Jar Binks members of an all-Jedi country-west- and the Lightsaber boys.” Suppos- Contributing Sith Lord starwarsfreaks.wreck.org began tor- from Phantom Menace so much, he ern band with Anakin Skywalker, edly, Jar Jar is rejected time and turing the officials by forcing them wants Jar Jar to play the leading roll played by Canadian actor Hayden time again to be in the band. In one In a surprising press conference to watch Citizen Kane, Mrs. Doubt- in the new film. Jar Jar, now made Christiansen, as their lead singer. scene, during an audition to fill the Sunday, writer/director George fire and Dumbo which, in the film to be even more goofy and laugh- Britney Spears will appear in the band’s Electra-Proton Banjo posi- Lucas announced last minute dras- community, make up what is known able (starwarsfreaks.wreck.org re- film as Obi-Wan Kenobi’s little sis- tion, Jar Jar performs on the Elec- tic changes to the upcoming Star as the “Anti-Star Wars” trilogy- the ports that as actually meaning ter igbay-oobiebay Kenobi. Spears tra-Proton Banjo so poorly, that it Wars sequel. Lucas, while reading three movies that are the exact op- “irritating” and “annoying”,) will will also perform both the music for causes *NSYNC star Justin Tim- from a prepared statement, said: posite of Star Wars. The Kidnap- save the universe from certain de- the opening title crawl, entitled “A berlake’s head to explode. That is, “Everything you’ve seen or heard pers used the “Anti-Star Wars” films struction with his clumsiness, and Long, Long Time Ago,” and the apparently, the only redeeming part about [the movie] is actually just a to liquefy the brains of the Lucas- even sing and dance in the movie’s movie’s incidental music, which will to the movie- to see Justin Timber- front. We made those trailers, post- film officials, and then to extract many musical numbers. Among the not be composed by John Williams, lake’s head blow up. ers and such solely for the purpose movie information from the offi- songs that Jar Jar will sing are “Mee- and preformed by the London Sym- Possible titles for the movie are of fooling the fans.” Lucas then went cials. sa wishing you were somehow here phony Orchestra as in previous Star reported to be The Happy Adven- on to explain that ever since the These kidnappers say on their again, Okeyday?”, “Okeyday-laho- Wars films. tures of Jar Jar, Outter Rim Side Sto- release of The Empire Strikes Back in website, that the Lucasfilm officials, ma,” Specific points of the plot are a ry, A Funny Thing Happened on the 1982 the fans “have methodically after they had been tortured and Despite Lucas’s many denials, bit sketchy, but it probably centers Way to Coruscant, or You’ll Still Come picked apart every trailer, every press broken, explained the new movie members of the popular boy-band around Jar Jar’s desire to be a mem- See This Movie, No Matter What I release and every interview and even in detail. They said George Lucas *NSYNC will star in the movie as ber of Skywalker’s band named “Ani Name It. before the release of the movie, they knew exactly what was going to happen. That is why I’m attempting to keep the fans in the dark of what will happen in the movie- it ruins the theatrical experience of the viewer if he or she knows all the twists and turns that will happen.” According to Lucas himself and his production company, Lucasfilm, what the public thought was going to happen in the movie is completely wrong. A representative of Lucas film did, however confirm that “yes, Anakin is still the father of Luke and Leia, and he will eventually be- come Darth Vader, but that’s about all that’s the same.” Even the title Attack of the Clones has been thrown out for a secret title that will be announced on opening day. However, some fanatical Star Wars fans are not completely in the dark about the actual movie. Im- mediately following the press conference, many unofficial Episode II preview websites started updating their predictions for the movie. One such site, starwarsfreaks.wreck.org, soon became a matter of controversy when it clamed to have kidnapped top Lucasfilm officials, specifically Photo illustration by Scott Meuleners / STUDENT PUBLICATIONS members of Episode II creative and The much reviled character from the first of George Lucas’ ‘Star Wars’ prequels, the Gungan Jar Jar Binks, is rumored to be taking a bigger role in the second film, Lucas said in a press conference that shocked the world. Your best option is to run and hide if you ever come across this face again.

Georgia Tech’s award-winning yearbook, Blueprint, is looking for section editors for 2002-2003.

Applications in Rm. 137 of Flag Building WHOA HEY NOW Técnica • Friday, April 1, 2002 • 21 Bush shows disgust over Oscar selections during Tech speech By Biz Vanilla Dogg Z matter where he looks he just can’t enced trainer.” ment in film that not even the most once again seeming to be in deep Assistant Deputy Associate find it. And unless I’m mistaken, I “But anyways, I don’t know when ignorant Academy could ignore.” contemplation, “What was that mov- couldn’t find a single nomination the Academy is going to stop award- A hand rose in the audience, “Pres- ie… Frosty the Demon? or.. Snow After President George W. Bush’s for that movie in the whole pro- ing crap and recognizing true ac- ident Bush, what are your recom- Devil, or oh, Jack Frost, right that inspiring address in Georgia Tech’s gram.” complishments in cinema. With any mendations for security in Marta was the name of that movie… Brrrrr.. O’Keefe Gymnasium stressing the “And another thing about the luck next year, when Bush the ani- Atlanta’s public transpor-“ scary.” Once again, the President importance of homeland security Animated film category,” Bush con- mated documentary smashes the box “Would you hold on just a mo- had a huge fit of uncontrollable laugh- and commending the preparedness tinued “Hello! Where in the hell offices, it will be an accomplish- ment?” the president interrupted ter at one of his own jokes. of Atlanta’s emergency personnel, was that Pokemon the Movie 3? As the President opened the floor to sure as MewTwo would dominate any and all questions. Pikachu, Pokemon the Movie 3 would After making brief replies to sev- dominate the animated film cate- eral questions from various mem- gory.” More uncontrollable laugh- bers of the audience, an off-subject ter resulted from Bush after this inquiry came from the back of the remark. auditorium that seemed to induce “ And what’s with this new fasci- an unusually strong emotional re- nation with gratuitous gore? Sexy sponse from the Beast, Monster’s President. “Mr. Ball, while I President, any haven’t seen any thoughts on of this junk first Sunday’s Acad- “Dude, where was hand, I don’t emy Awards?” ‘Dude, Where’s My think it’s hard to Upon hear- judge by the ti- ing the question, Car’? It’s funny tles that these the President because this guy can’t movies are prob- looked down at ably going to the podium and find his car all day!” end up in the sighed sarcasti- George W. Bush bad horror sec- cally as he began Leader of the Free World tion of the vid- to shake his head eo store. Not to in disapproval. take anything “Well I’ll tell away from The you what”, began the president, “ I Puppet Master, Leprechaun in the have to say again this year what I say Hood, and that movie with the kill- every year; the Oscars are a bunch er snowman, which are all excep- of hooey… It was quite clear to me tions, but most of those gory horror that Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius was movies are a waste of time and have by far the superior animated feature no business in the Oscars.” film to either Shrek or Monsters, Inc.” “And another thing, I’ve been “And that’s not the only thing waiting forever to see Toy story 3? that didn’t add up right in my opin- When’s that coming out? I’m sure ion” as Bush cracked a goofy smile, it would easily win out over any “Dude, where was Dude, Where’s attempt to make Shrek 2, and may- My Car”? Bush began laughing un- be even Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius controllably at his pun. Attempting 2. But Pokemon the Movie 4… that to regain control of himself, the Pres- would be a close one, kind of like ident continued, “I mean really now, Jigglypuff, under the guidance of I’ve had that movie screened at the an experienced trainer, battling White House seven times and it against Entei.” At this point the still makes me laugh my ass off; it’s president, in deep contemplation, By Robert Hill / STUDENT PUBLICATIONS funny cause this guy wakes up one glanced upward for a few moments. Though his official reason for coming to speak at Georgia Tech was to discuss antiterrorism and homeland morning and can’t find his car, no “Entei.. with a somewhat experi- security, President George W. Bush also talked about the injustices done by voters in this year’s Oscars. 22 • Monday, April 1, 2002 • Técnica WHOA HEY NOW Two Bits Man to hire Spears’ publicist in attempt to boost column readership By Grampy DeCampy career.” Attendees of the conference subsequently started twirling a mi- Contributing Old Man commented that Whitlock main- crophone around like a set of num- tained a warm and professional de- chucks. She knocked Klein In a press conference on Wednes- unconscious, and he was rushed to day afternoon, popular columnist, Grady. A Grady spokesperson told TwoBits Man severed ties with long- reporters that Klein had recovered, time friend and publicist, Dee Dee “I think it’s time that and would be sent home by midday Whitlock, citing months of low read- today. Klein was unavailable for com- ership of the Technique, the paper Two Bits got the ment. for which Man writes. “I realize this respect he deserves. I After his press conference, Two- is an unfortunate end for our long Bits Man told AP reporters that he working relationship, but Ms. Whit- want to see his work had already chosen Lisa Kasteler, lock is detrimental to my writing above the fold.” former publicist to Britney Spears, career,” said TwoBits Man. The as his new press agent. Recently dis- writer noted that he wished Whit- Lisa Kasteler missed due to repeated inconsisten- lock luck in her search for a new Two Bits Man’s new agent cies in the reporting of Spears’ celebrity to represent. relationship with teen heartthrob, In response to Man’s press con- Justin Timberlake, Kasteler wel- ference, Whitlock hosted her own comed the opportunity to work with press conference Thursday morn- meanor until Tom Klein of the AJC Man. “I think it’s time that Two- ing. “I am understandably disheart- asked her if she considered herself Bits got the respect he deserves. First Sideways’ Crossword Answers ened at the loss of one of my favorite responsible for the loss in Technique and foremost, I want to see his work clients, but I realize that he must do readership. After the remark, Whit- Use at your own risk! what he feels right to further his lock threw a chair at Klein, and See Bitz, page 25 WHOA HEY NOW Técnica • Friday, April 1, 2002 • 23

Bitz from page 24 Parking to model after MTV’s Road Rules on the front page above the fold. By Shirley Youjest over all of their money (including locals tossed around was to switch donic suggestion, one that was close Leave the Entertainment section for Staff Horrible Name Generator valuable jewelry, golden teeth piec- the RV to a red pick-up truck in- to his heart. “I’d like to see the cast the failed groupies,” said Kasteler. es and family members) to the park- stead, but show producers decided fit into a small car, like they do in At the press conference, Technique MTV seems like an unattain- ing department. Whether these items the logistics would be impossible. those reality TV game shows, park Entertainment Editor, Andrew able dream filled with unattainable will be returned to the cast remains Other changes: clues will now be illegally on Tech’s campus, and then Santelli was seen weeping in the hot guys (even though Carson Daly to be seen. (Although the money posted on GT newsgroups and the see how long it takes them to get a corner mumbling, “Why, God, would be considered unattractive will definitely NOT be returned as bull tied to the front of the RV will parking ticket from one of my park- Why?” Kasteler later commented at Georgia Tech) more than 800 evidenced by every Tech student’s be replaced with a ‘T’—but only ing-ticket-Nazis. They wouldn’t last that her eighteen-month goal was miles north of here? Not since that experience with the Parking De- once the first mission is completed. ten seconds! Muah ha ha ha ha!” As to gain syndication for the column. Matt guy got onto The Real World partment.) This is because the first of all of his face turned a deep purple, Weis “I have already contacted represen- by fooling MTV execs into think- The familiar Road Rules format the Georgia Tech-themed missions continued, “They’d run screaming tatives from The Daily Oklahoman, ing Techies were more than the ste- will be followed, with a team of of the new season will be to steal the like George O’Leary from Notre and we are in contract negotiations. reotypical CS major have we put college-aged students living together ‘T’ off Tech Tower, unscathed (both Dame when they saw that yellow By the end of 2002, I want to see ourselves on the teenie-bopping map. in a cramped RV, vying to win a physically and by the UJC Chief piece of hell descend upon their TwoBits running in high profile Go ‘head G. Tech! large pot of money for their team. Justice). Several other missions have windshield!” publications like The Marietta Dai- Now the hit “Ten Spot” show, One change that will be made is the been proposed as well. One that A group urination in the Reck, ly Journal and The National Inquir- Road Rules, will be gracing Georgia quantity of cast members. Due to was suggested has already been getting Buzzed “down south” and Tech’s parking lots with its wildly the size and stature of the average scrapped; the members would have attending a Drama Tech show have entertaining schtick. This news CS major, the number of members been instructed to attempt to get also been considered as challenges. comes only after the show’s pro- in the cast will be increased this caught cheating on a Computer Sci- The Tech saturated season of “I [the Two Bits Man] ducers were forced to wait a mere season. Road Rules producers ratio- ence assignment (but of course not Road Rules promises to be the best five years for the Parking Depart- nalize that the smaller the person, told if they were successful for at yet. The South’s Liveliest will be sure am not dating ment to grant them permission to the more that need to be put in the least 15 weeks), but this was deemed to tell you when O’Keefe and sur- [*NSYNC’s] Justin use the lots for the infamous bull- RV to decrease their comfort level. too easy of a task. rounding streets are blocked off again, headed RV. The producers were Another idea for change Georgian Rod Weis had a particularly sar- but now to welcome the cast. Timberlake.” impressed with Parking’s speed in Two Bits Man addressing the issue. Rod Weis, head Newly-Divafied Columnist of Georgia Tech Parking, takes the credit. “I really had to push for the necessary permits to be approved for MTV. I mean, we had graduat- er,” Kasteler said. ing seniors who have been request- At the conference, Kasteler also ing on-campus parking permits since took her first step towards reshap- their freshman year to whom I just ing Man’s image. “I am pleased to had to say ‘I’m sorry, my dead cat’s announce that Mr. Man and Justin needs are more important than yours. Timberlake are in a very solid rela- And this is no dead cat; this is MTV!’ tionship.” Entertainment pundits Plus, the producers said I might get question whether or not this rela- to appear on the show.” tionship could possibly last, given Does this mean bribery is the Timberlake’s inconsistent past with key to parking passes? Only time Spears. will tell. “I am not dating Justin Timber- Although the show will not be lake,” said Man leaving the confer- filmed until a cast is assembled and ence. Following behind, Kasteler the various obstacle courses are de- assured members of the press that cided upon, excitement in the shoddy Man and Timberlake were the ideal construction industry is building. pair, and that like any celebrity duo, “We must factor in the time it will they preferred to keep their rela- take to build a new parking deck tionship out of the public spotlight. and then rebuild it,” Rod Weis ex- If Kasteler’s representation of Man plained as to why production is be- prove false, he could be the second ing forecast for so long from now. Photo illustration by Scott Meuleners / STUDENT PUBLICATIONS celebrity to denounce Kasteler within According to show tradition, each This marvelous vehicle is the RV students will be traveling aboard in the new version of Road Rules currently one week. cast member will be forced to turn being planned as a joint venture between MTV and Georgia Tech’s Department of Parking and Transportation. 24 • Monday, April 1, 2002 • Técnica WHOA HEY NOW WHOA HEY NOW Técnica • Friday, April 1, 2002 • 25 Sideways Crossword Memories of April 1 By King Crossy IV 33. Timidity Student body officially “not very 65. Gilligan’s homestead Contributing Crossword Monarch 36. Slimer’s excretion 66. Small brook 37. Article 67. Transmitted adept” at selecting Oscar winners Across 38. 04/01/1849 item 68. Hotel-room features By Golden Boy Oxford, who took the big goose egg 1. Torah superset 42. Gangster Barker 69. Femur-tibia connections Senior Staff Statuette in this year’s contest. Oxford has 6. CTRL-z, sometimes 43. Scottish boy Down vowed to make it up on the co-rec 10. Liquid attack 45. Silencer button 1. Engagements The first ever Technique Oscars volleyball court, cleaning up along 14. Actor Flynn 46. Relaxing agent 2. root(2), for instance Forecast has come and gone, and with his WCF teammates. 15. Prima donna rendition 48. Channel 3. Porcupine quality it’s official. The intrepid Tech stu- The biggest controversy came 16. Ethereal 51. Citizens, to the IRS 4. Scottish bay dents who entered the contest should when Derick Stanger thought he’d 17. 04/01/1974 personality 52. Queen-bee mater 5. Moose be applauded for their efforts, though be clever and submit his answers 19. Vacation outing 54. Kidman film “___ and Away” 6. Inert gas they didn’t do so hot this year. after the winners had already had 20. Psoriasis, for instance 55. Christmas and New Years and 7. Brockovich of fame Congratulations to David Rott- their names read and been given 21. Thumbs-up! precursor 8. Onion cutter mann, the champion of this year’s their awards. Derick should feel 22. Waken 56. Irate 9. Hardwood contest. Rottmann picked five of ashamed of himself for trying to 23. Excessive (slang acr.) 58. Amtrak roadway 10. Subordinate bureaucrat the seven eligible categories correctly, cheat at this contest. Come on now, 24. Possess 60. Detergent option 11. Headdress of false hair (archaic) missing out on Halle Berry’s tri- it’s the Oscars Forecast, it’s not that 25. Cut again 61. In ____ of (replacement) 12. Funerary flower umph in the Best Actress category big of a deal! 27. Mosaic craftsmen 62. 04/01/440 BC building mate- 13. A, B, AB, or O for Monster’s Ball and Jim Broad- Anyway, Rottmann will win a 29. Conceited rial 18. Weaves bent’s surprising win in Iris. fabulous prize (that has yet to be 32. Club manufacturer 64. Drop heavily 22. Cleopatra killer This was substantially better than determined but will probably con- others in the field, like Technique sist of some free food). Don’t forget 12345 6789 10111213 24. Nabisco treat 26. Peseta upstager Editor-in-Chief Matt Bryan, who to join us next year for the Inaugu- 14 15 16 28. Little troll only picked one award winner cor- ral Second Annual Technique Os- 30. Techie Boston suburb rectly, and photography stud Brian cars Forecast contest. 17 18 19 31. Singer’s ailment 33. Bad cold, maybe Technique Oscars Forecast Official Results

20 21 22 1st, David Rottmann 5 out of 7 ○○○○ 34. Exists, to Jacques ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

2nd, Andrew Santelli, Technique Entertainment Editor 4 out of 7 ○○○○ 23 24 25 26 35. Historical period ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

tie, Virginia Bacon 4 out of 7 ○○○○

39. Foreboding symbol ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

27 28 29 30 31 tie, Daniel Weksler 4 out of 7 ○○○○

40. Cordelia’s dad ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

5th, Scott Meuleners 3 out of 7

○○○○ 41. Result of God’s first act ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○ 32 33 34 35 36

44. Indignancy tie, Peter Sahlstrom 3 out of 7 ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

37 38 39 40 41 42 47. Perceptible by the eye tie, Matt Callaway 3 out of 7 ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

49. Enter uninvited tie, Jody Shaw 3 out of 7

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43 44 45 46 47 50. Flirtatiously shy tie, Jamie Schulz 3 out of 7

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51. Pocket PC competitor 10th, Wendell Turner, Jr. 2 out of 7 ○○○○ 48 49 50 51 ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

53. Delete tie, Kimberly Rieck 2 out of 7

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52 53 54 55 54. Corrects a malfunction tie, Justin Miller 2 out of 7

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56. Von Trapp gateway 13th, Matthew Bryan 1 out of 7

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56 57 58 59 60 57. Aida river tie, Matt Flagg 1 out of 7 ○○○○ 59. ____ lang syne ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

tie, Margarit Khachatryan 1 out of 7 ○○○○ 61 62 63 60. Broad smile ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

tie, Erik Pace 1 out of 7 ○○○○ 62. White lie ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

64 65 66 17th, Brian Oxford 0 out of 7 ○○○○ 63. Commandment container ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

DQ, Derick Stanger 7* out of 7 ○○○○ 67 68 69 ○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○○ Answers are on page 24. Or are they? Derick Stanger was disqualified for submitting his entries after the Academy

Awards telecast had concluded. Derick, cheaters never win.

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