The WALRUS The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things: Of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of cabbages and kings. -- Lewis Carroll ‘13 St. Sebastian’s School April 2013 Poet Laureate Billy Collins Charms Seb’s with Dry Wit, Modern Verse There was always a glamour to po- was miserable. But there is some- etry. I liked it. I probably wouldn’t thing very authentic about humor. By DAN FULHAM ‘14 have liked my teenage self had I met Anybody can pretend to look serious. him today.” You are pretending to look serious A few weeks ago, St. Se- right now as you listen and nod in- bastian’s had the pleasure of listening Q: Unfortunately, unlike yourself, tently about the things I say. But you to former poet laureate Billy Collins. many students have an allergic reac- can’t pretend to be funny.” With his indelible wit and charm, tion to poetry. For example, during Collins livened corporate chapel, your readings you stated that poetry Q: How do you craft and know when renouncing the anti-poetry sentiments was ‘something you did by [your]self to finish a poem? of many students here at Sebs. He to pass the time.’ How do you think read some of his poems to the school poetry could be made more appealing A: When writing poetry, you start in community, many of which touched to the cynics that are teenagers? Kansas and end up in Oz. The thing on day to day struggles and humorous that keeps me writing is ‘where is mishaps to which all of us can relate. A: Well, first off, I think the prob- this going?’ Oh, and the worst time His poem “Hangover,” in which he lem with the way poetry is taught to write, by the way, is when you’re depicts a man’s desire to kill children today is that students are never really emotional. Concentrate and be clear- playing Marco Polo the morning after shown contemporary poets. They headed. It’s not about you being emo- an interesting evening, was oddly the read Milton and Shakespeare, but tional, which is self-indulgent…Who Mr. Herren’s inspirational message left a lasting impact on the students, captivated by awe. most relatable poem of the bunch for no one presents them with relatable, cares about expressing yourself? For St. Sebastian’s students. Hmmm. His humorous, modern poets. I think a stranger to care about your emotions humor was well-received by all, with having teenagers start by learning the would be psychotic. You have to lie. Chris Herren Preaches Project Purple the exception of a young David Abel- poets of today and moving backwards The white lie is that you are more son. After his talk in St. Bart’s, Mr. would increase interest in the subject. interested in poetry than yourself.” far as to wait outside ten minutes be- By KENNY CHEN ‘13 high school students, where all addicts Collins held a smaller Q&A session in I try to get my students interested by fore a Celtics game for his dealer. He begin. Anyone can become an addict, the McCulloch room. I was fortunate showing them what poetry looks like All told, Billy Collins was HEAD WRITER needed Oxycontin for his basketball. and Herren cut to the point by saying enough to interview him afterwards. now.” an entertaining speaker for the Sebs He went on to play professionally for that he remembered being in the Seb’s On Wednesday, April 10th, former The following text is removed from community. He was able to demys- teams in Italy, Poland, Turkey, China, students shoes, sitting in similar as- Celtics player Chris Herren addressed my discussion with Mr. Collins as Q: What role do you think humor tify poetry, thus making it a more and Iran, but his drug problems never semblies and with an attitude of, “Aw the St. Sebastian’s community in well as other student questions. plays in poetry? appealing subject for our, at times, went away. At age 24, in the front seat man, another one of these speeches?” Ward Hall. No summary can pos- hyper-masculine environment. Mov- of his car in Italy, “dope-sick,” Herren Herren said that he regretted that atti- Q: Although we youth have trouble A: Humor was always an integral ing forward, hopefully some Arrows sibly do justice to his amazing story, had his dealer cook up dope for him. tude because he thought that he could believing it, you were 16 once. Did part of poetry. With the romantics, it will heed his words and treat poetry which by far is personally the most At age 27 back in the States, his sub- never end up as one of the addicts on you possess the stereotypical view of more or less died. Shakespeare wrote with a bit more importance. His sense touching of all stories I have heard. stance abuse had become so bad that the street with no home. He shared his poetry that most boys maintain, see- comedies. There was 18th century of humor is on par with the student He first had the community watch a he had only 17 dollars, in contrast to experiences at other schools, saying ing as you attended an all-boys school satire. Then came the romantics in body, and with any luck, his love of thirty minute introductory video that his half-a-million salary in Italy, and that after one assembly, he received a like Sebs? 1798, and some kind of horrible deal the written word will rub off on some traced his life from when he was a was living on the streets. He failed to call (is this right, whoever is editing was struck. With that, one thing you unsuspecting ‘broooos.’ high school basketball legend in Fall pick up his wife and two children at this right now?) from a girl who was A: “No, I was very cool back then. could understand was that the poet River at basketball-obsessed Durfee the airport because he could not drive constantly bullied at school because High School, one hour outside of due to side effects from the drugs he she wore the same clothes every day. Boston, to his current dedication of took—he pulled over multiple times to Her parents had substance problems sharing his story with various schools rest for twenty minute intervals before and abused her. Other kids took pic- and groups throughout the nation, returning to the road, only to repeat the tures of her and posted them online. In including the players at the NFL same process. His wife waited for ten a hopeless situation, she cut her arms Rookie Symposium. After the video, hours, not wanting to break the chil- on a regular basis, hiding the numer- he gave a stunning account of his dren’s joy and hope that their father ous cuts with her sleeves, but after past drug life and his view on drugs. was picking them up, before calling a hearing Herren’s inspiring story, she After being named the Boston Globe cab to take them home. Later, in Fall chose to show her cuts and confront and Gatorade Player of the Year and a River, after putting his children on her bullies boldly. Since then, she has McDonald’s High School All-Amer- the school bus, Herren overdosed on never been bullied at school, and Her- ican as a high school senior, Chris heroin and crashed into a utility pole. ren finds her email update every month attended Boston College in 1994. According to paramedics, he had been one of the most important things in his At BC, he was featured in multiple dead for thirty seconds. His turning life. After presenting at the gym of magazines such as Rolling Stone and point came when, while at a reha- another school “not far from [Seb’s],” Sports Illustrated; however, before bilitation center in New York, against Herren received a text message from playing, Herren failed a drug test the advice of his treatment center, he a girl and her boyfriend, who were for marijuana and cocaine use. He returned home to see the birth of his both alone in the gym after everyone claimed that when he first encoun- third child—out of hope that he would left. They both had various liquors tered cocaine at age 18, he thought be sober once when seeing one of his and drugs on them and planned to kill that he would just do cocaine once children born. After the birth, he went themselves that day, but after the as- and never do it again. He said that the to the liquor store, and upon return- sembly, they both decided against sui- circumstances—fellow BC students ing to the hospital, his wife told him cide. Herren told Seb’s students that Billy Collins addresses his Sebs audience in another moment of brazen, poetic glory offering him to give it a try when he he has broken her heart many times, he shares his stories especially with opened the door to find them in his but that she could not see him break high school students, because they room—demanded him to give it one his children’s hearts anymore—he need it the most, and that he shares small go. His first line, he said, led to was no longer welcome home. Back because he will do anything to help him squandering thousands of dollars: at the treatment center, the counselor even one student in each of his talks.