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10 PRINCIPLES for HELPING BABY SLEEP THROUGH the NIGHT April 16, 2012 by Christiekiley — 16 Comments

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10 PRINCIPLES for HELPING BABY SLEEP THROUGH the NIGHT April 16, 2012 by Christiekiley — 16 Comments FREE STUFF! ABOUT THE BLOG HOW I BECAME AN OT WHAT IS OCCUPATIONAL THERAPY (OT)? MY E-BOOKS! POPULAR POSTS DEVELOPMENTAL MILESTONES TOY & GIFT GUIDES SENSORY PROCESSING DISORDER FUNCTIONAL SKILLS FOR KIDS FOR PROSPECTIVE OT STUDENTS RECOMMENDED RESOURCES PRIVACY/DISCLOSURE 10 PRINCIPLES FOR HELPING BABY SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT April 16, 2012 by christiekiley — 16 Comments Save 1K+ Ahhh, sleep. Probably the most hotly debated topic in all of baby-rearing. It seems everybody’s got an opinion, quick !x, or one-size- !ts-all solution when it comes to baby sleep. As a mom whose baby has struggled with and fought sleep for months on end, I can personally vouch for the fact that the world is full of con"icting advice and so-called “experts” who can barely agree on anything when it comes to baby sleep. On behalf of sleep-deprived parents everywhere, I just want to walk up to this panel of experts, grab them by the shoulders, and say, “JUST GIVE ME THE FACTS!” It shouldn’t be that hard, right? There are facts about the best ways to help babies sleep, aren’t there? We don’t just have to leave it to generational fads and the unsolicited opinions of well-meaning strangers, do we? No. We don’t. Like many sleep deprived parents, I have desperately turned to peers, family members, and books and websites devoted to helping my sleepless baby (and his mama) sleep better. Despite con"icting information and heated debates, it seems there do exist some universal truths about baby sleep. Imagine that! They have simply become lost in the shu#e. After personally sifting through tons of murky info, it seems “experts” would likely agree upon the following 10 sleep principles no matter what their approach to helping babies sleep through the night. Once you understand these 10 principles and are ready to further pursue speci!c strategies for how to actually help your baby sleep better, go ahead and check out the links at the bottom of this post. They should help you make a more informed decision about what your next step should be in this whole sleep thing. Ready? Here we go: 1. Sleep begets sleep. Don’t buy into the lie that keeping a baby up all day will result in a longer stretch of sleep at night! It’s just not true. One of the number one reasons babies wake frequently at night is due to the fact that they are “overtired”. Seems counter-intuitive, I know. But think about it. You know how, as an adult, you can get a “second wind” after you’ve been feeling tired? The same thing happens with babies. They get really tired because they’ve missed out on some portion of sleep or have been awake for too long, so their brain sends out a signal to give them the equivalent of a second wind. So now their brain thinks things are !ne, when really their body is begging for sleep, and what do you get? An overly tired baby who fusses and cries and yawns and rubs his eyes and SCREAMS, but who just can’t seem to fall asleep or stay asleep. His body just can’t relax enough. This is why daytime sleep is oh so important. The longer and more consistently a baby naps during the day, the better chance he will have at being able to sleep longer at night, and vice versa. 2. Understand what “sleeping through the night” really means. When a baby “sleeps through the night”, it means he gets about 5-6 hours of sleep (typically midnight to 5:00 or 6:00am) without waking for food or comfort. But that’s not “through the night”! you may object. Well, sorry to burst your bubble. I know it’s not for you, but it is for your little baby. As he gets older he will be able to sleep longer, maybe even up to 10-12 hours uninterrupted. But starting out, set your standard at 5-6 hours and then you can be realistic in your expectations. 3. Understand when babies are developmentally capable of sleeping through the night. Many sources report babies are capable of sleeping through the night (remember, this means a 5-6 hour stretch) by 2-3 months. However, that doesn’t mean all babies will sleep through the night by this age. Some may not reach this coveted milestone until they are 9-12 months…maybe even older. When they can sleep through the night and when they do are two very di$erent things, and this is often a$ected by factors such as temperament, sleep habits, and sleep environment. Continue down the list to see what I mean. 4. Address the underlying cause !rst. While it may be “easier” to pick up a book or hop on a website to !nd out how to make your baby sleep better (maybe that’s why you’re reading this post?), you must !rst identify and address the underlying cause of baby’s sleep di%culties. Is she getting enough nutrition during the day? If she’s genuinely hungry, how can she be expected to sleep through the night? This has been a big one for us, as our little one has refused the bottle from an early age even though his mama works outside the home. Hungry baby = sleep-deprived baby = overtired baby = no fun for anyone. Are there underlying health issues that must be addressed? If she is sick, teething, or dealing with something painful like gas or re"ux, then those things need to be dealt with before she can really relax and begin to sleep more peacefully. Is her sleep environment comfortable and conducive to sleep? Would you be able to sleep well if the sheets were scratchy, temperature of the room (or your body) was too hot or too cold, sun shone through the curtains, and you could hear everything going on in the house? Well, neither can baby. I’m sure you could think of other examples of underlying causes that must be addressed in order to help baby sleep, so for the sake of brevity, let’s move on. 5. Consider the TOTAL number of hours your baby sleeps in a 24-hour period. This is really the most important number to keep track of when it comes to making sure your baby is getting enough sleep. Yes, it would be magical if he slept 10 straight hours at night. But check out the numbers below to see where your baby is at (thanks to BabyCenter.com) before making any drastic changes to his sleep schedule. “ Age Nighttime SleepDaytime Sleep *Total Sleep 1 month 8 8 (inconsistent) 16 3 months 10 5 (3) 15 6 months 11 3 1/4 (2) 14 1/4 9 months 11 3 (2) 14 12 months11 1/4 2 1/2 (2) 13 3/4 18 months11 1/4 2 1/4 (1) 13 1/2 2 years 11 2 (1) 13 3 years 10 1/2 1 1/2 (1) 12 *Note: number of naps in parentheses 6. A baby’s temperament will a"ect the nature of his sleep. Some babies are easy-going, some are angels, some are sensitive, some are spirited (code for “screamers”), some are strong-willed. Some are social sleepers, some need their space. The list goes on. Most will exhibit a combination of traits, but many will also !nd one trait to be the leader of the pack, so to speak. My baby? Strong- willed, spirited, social sleeper. I envy those whose sweet, easy-going angel babies peacefully drift o$ to sleep in their own crib as soon as they show the !rst sign of fatigue and seem to go with the "ow no matter what. That has certainly not been the experience in our household! So, like I said, a baby’s temperament can certainly shape the way in which he interacts with and experiences sleep, thus, it will in"uence the approach to sleep taken in each household (and with each individual child). So the next time you’re tempted to compare your baby with little Josie down the block who slept through the night at 3 weeks, just remember this baby is di$erent than that baby. It’s unfair to compare the two (ohhhh, but it’s so tempting!). I would also like to include a note about the importance of developmental stages in this conversation about temperament. As babies get older (around 7-8+ months), they begin to !gure out how their behavior controls their caregiver’s behavior. This may mean they begin screaming more prior to nap/bedtime in an e$ort to either avoid sleep or gain your attention (they know from experience if they scream long and loud enough, you will come in, pick them up, and give in to whatever they want). They also tend to develop separation anxiety around this age as well. It is important to understand where your baby is developmentally in order to accurately determine how you are to approach their sleep issues. 7. Babies bene!t from consistent routines. When a baby is born, she enters a world !lled with unknowns. Back in the womb, everything was pretty much the same — dark, warm, snug, and !lled with whooshing noises. But things are wildly di$erent out here in the real world and, all of a sudden, baby has no idea what to expect. This is why a baby will often respond very well to consistent, predictable routines that signal to her what’s coming next.
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