THE CLARION
VOL. VI—No. 10 AUGUSTANA ACADEMY, CANTO N, SOUTH DAKOTA, APRIL 1, 1927 PRICE }O.o,
NEW PRINCIPAL ELECTED TO SUCCEED PRESIDENT H. M. DALE Academy Boys Place •••■•••■••..... Reverend Rothnem Third at N. L. C. A. New AucustanaAcademy Principal of Dell Rapids New Basketball Tourney Rev. Botolf J. Rothnem, re- Academy Princilwa. Win in the Consolations cently elected principal of To 'fake Up Duties About July 1 Augustana academy to suc- The academy basket ball team left ceed Prof. H. M. Dlae, was a Monday, March 6, to take part in the Rev. Bottolf Jacob Rothnem, 1a,st-or student at St.' Olaf College, N.L.C.A. basketball tournament to of Dell Rapids for more that nine Northfield, Minn., from 1902 years, was unanimously selected. be held at St. Olaf college on March to 1996. He was a member Tuesday by the board of directors of 7, 8, and 9. of the same class as Pres. J. the Augustana College association to They left about eight o'clock Mon- N. Brown of Concordia col- succeed Prof. H. M. Dale as princi- day morning and landed safely in lege and Prof. H. M. Dale. pal of Augustana academy. After Northfield about 9:30 that evening Rev. Rothnem served as accepting th e position, Rev. Rotl,oeira with no trouble to speak of, except president of the Sioux Falls stated that he expects to be ablr t.o stiff joints and limbs. Here they were circuit of the Norwegian enter upon his duties here about taken care Lutheran church of America of and given rooms in the from 1922 to 1924. He is at 1, or possibly a littl e earlier. dormitory at St. Olaf. present a member of the Before he can take up his -work as The tournament opened the follow- board of directors of the Au- principal of the academy Rev. uot.h- ing day at eleven o'clock A. M. with g ustana college association. ncm must give his Dell Rapids con- a game between Red Wing seminary He was elected a member of the South Dakota district gregation ten days' notice to col and Park Region,., of. _ Ferg.us Falls, Board of Education at. the meeting for the consideration o:r ]is Minn. This was ,a very close game district. convention last June. resignation. He must also alloy the and a good beginner for the tourna- Rev. Rothnem gained wide congregation three months in ment. Park Region succeeded in renown a year ago when he wrote the text of the `=Cen- to name his successor. winning after two extra periods. The tennial Cantata", written for Rev. Rothnem, in whose hand: the academy played their first game at the Norse centennial and future welfare and success of Au_~- 4 o'clock that afternoon when they sung in the Minneapolis ar- REV. B. J. ROTHNEM gustana academy will largely clashed with the Luther Preps of De- mory last June. was born on September 7, 1877, corah, Iowa. The game was rather Oslo, Norway. He attended Luolaer- slow, the teams being unused to such Innerclass Tourney Honor Roll an Normal school at Madison, _l'_:1 7 a large floor. At the end of the half The Inner-class Basket Ball Tour- The following pupils have received from 1896 to 1900. He obtaine•! the academy was leading 5 to 4, and nament ended Wednesday, March 23, grade of B or above in all their B. S. degre e from St. Olaf colleg when time was called with 5 minutes when the Juniors won a victory over studies for the winter quarter - which 1906. He was a student at the United. to play the score was tied 8 to 8. the Freshmen. The Sophomore class ended March 5. Church seminary from 1908 to X11, Then the Luther Preps opened up on come off with the championship, and Advanced completing with a C. T. He stra ed long shots and dropped' three in rapid are entitled to the silver loving cup Alice Amundson, Esther Anderson, at Gallaudet college, Washington. D. succession, making the score 14 to 8 which is presented each year to the Agnes Jaeger, Barbara Johnson, Flo- C. during 1906 and 1907, rece.rTing in their favor. Hagge then scored upon completion an- A. M. degree, th -,.._ 2 S.1 champions. ra Nims, Theola O'Banion. and ended to 13 in fa_.' or Seniors Re is Roth acra of the Preps. The games were as follows: Olive Gubbruil, Esther Olbertson, school at Ostrander, Minn., from i 00_ On Tuesday evening the boys had March 16—Freshmen 18, Adv. 27 Ragna Reinertson, Myrtle Sullestad. to 1901; at Hanley Falls, Minn,.., :n the privilege of watching the St. March 18—Advanced 4, Sophomore Juniors 1899; at Clarkfield, Minn., in ~+'02; Olaf and Carleton college teams 32 Jeanette Dale, Mildred Halderson, at Madison, Minn., during 1909 and clash in the famous Goat game. In March 19=Juniors 15, Advanced 16 Irene Halderson, Esther Loaning, 1910; at Castle Rock, Wis. in 1P10. a very fast game the Carleton team March 19—Sophomore 12, Fresh, 6 Florence Sogn. fie taught the third and fourth grades carried the goat home in triumph March 22—Sophomore 19—Juniors Sophomores. in' the New York Institute for Deaf with a score of 34 to 23. - 12 Lililan Larson. during 1907 and 1908. The defeat by the Luther Preps March 23—Freshman 10-Juniors Freshmen Following this, Rev. Rotin:'€rot took away all chance of first or sec- 14 Hazel Pale, Hannah Hanson, Palma taught religion at th e State S:hco1• ond place for the Academy team but The total scores made by the Soph- Larson, Carmen Opsahl, Emily Sogn, for Deaf, Faribault, _Minn., from 1013 they still had a chance of winning omores 63, opponents 22. -ooeda Sogn. to 1918, and later at Sioux Falls, -..qe (Continued on page 2) (Continued on page 2)
Seniors Royally "Inspiration of Past The Senior Class
Entertain Juniors Mission Achievement" Advanced Classes Selects Class Play To Give Class Pay. St. Patricks Party Mission Band Topic "Daddy Longlegs" "Nothing But the Truth" On the eve,. of St. Patrick's Day the `ilnspiration of Past Missionary The play "Daddy Long Legs" in Junior class was delightfully enter- Achievement" was the theme dis- "Nothing but the Truth", a co::aed:y four acts, tells of an orphan girl in a tamed by the members of th- Senior cussed by Barbara Johnson at Mis- in three acts by James Montgomery, bleak New England orphanage who class. sion Band last Su;lnay morning. has been selected by the Advanced has spirit enough to say what she The program . given would have . "Although we are completing a class for their class play and wi?1 'be thinks and thus gains the interest of made an Irishman think of the good century and a quarter of missions, we given in the near future. a trustee of the John Grier Home who old days in Ireland. The Juniors are are just at the beginning of our atsk. Is it possible to tell the absolute sends her to a 'fashionable girls' col- not Irish bat the readings and Irish The past may be written down almost truth—even for twenty-four hem's? -loge. Here she meets and falls in songs instilled in some of the more as a failure unless it leads us on to It is—at least Bob Bennett, the be,eo love with a man who proves to be romantic minds a desire to take a something more complete. You may of "Nothing but th e Truth" actor° p- her guardian and who is known as stroll into a garden of Wild Irish recall what Wait Whitman said, "It lishes the feat. The bet he made Daddy-Long-Legs. Roses with Pat and Mike. The pro- is inherent in the nature of things with his partners, his friends, .and Cast of characters: gram was as follows: that from any fruition of success his fiancee—these are th a incidga t.a Judy Abbott—orphaned authoress Piano solo—"Tipperary March" and however complete, shall come forth ill -James Montgomery's tremor , loos Charlotte Johnson "Irish Blarney" __Esther Olbertson something that shall make a greater comedy hit. Jervis Pendleton—Daddy-Long-Legs Reading—"Borrowing a Pie" and struggle necessary." So, with refer- "Nothing but the Truth" is whole- Clarence Gunderson "Mrs. Murphy's Grief" ance to the past work and to work- heartedly recommended as one OS the James McBride—whose father Crystal Sogn ers of the past. Most sprightly, amusing and popular makes overalls ____ Julian Hoxeng Duet—"Wild Irish Rose" and "Long comedies of which this country can Sallie McBride—his sister Way to Tipperary" Again, in looking at the past we do boast. Don't fail to see this play! Crystal Sogn L. Hagge and C. Gunderson not for a moment propose Sto endorse Watch for the date. The follow r.g Miss Pritchard—family friend of -"Family Album"—cast of characters: it unqualifidely, it is indeed an occa- cast has been selected: Jervis Olive Gubbrud Naughty Little Girl sion of thanksgiving to God for his Robert .Bennett ____ John Christopher Julia Pendleton—college room mate 'Charlotte Johnson marvelous grace and power in these E. M. Ralston acli'ie Sley. role?. 'of Sallie and Judy Esther Olbertson Her Mother Anne Lykken decades, but it is also quite as fully an occasion for confession and hu- Dick Donnelly Olaf O;erth- Mrs. Pendleton, her mother The Minister and his Wife ___ _ Clarence Van Dusen _ Gordon Cowan, Esther Sommervold I Hilman Williams and Clara Russet miliation that there has been so much Bishop Doran Clifford Gre:nos Cyrus Wykoff—trustee Mary Thea Peterson imperfect and so much at fault in the Gwendolyn Ralston __ Ruth Knowhc'n. Leonard Hegrge Vampire Jennie Varo quantity and quality of our human Mrs. E. M. Ralston __ Dorothy G't:tn Abner Parson—trustee . _ School Teacher ___ Myrtle Sullestad achie vement. Ethel Clark Buelah Syvc"rid Julian Hoxeng Old Maid Aunt Gladys Kloster We look at the past; therefore, to Mable Jackson Esther Ands reoo Mrs. Lippett—matron of orphanage Nurs e Thelma Eidsness ask what values it has in it for the Sable Jackson Alice Amundco>a (Continued on page 2) (Continued on page 2) (Continued on page 2) Ai artha Esther Jaeger PAGE TWO THE CLARION Maren Linstad, registrar, practice Gunar Moe arrived Thursday from teaching, algebra and reviews; Eliza- Brookings State college to spend the Ac CLARIGN beth Muus, biology chemistry and spring vacation at his home. Editor in Chief____Barbara Johnson mathematics; Laurinda Houg, domes- Miss Marie Sletvold, of Bryant, S. Associate Editor Olive Gubbrud Managing Editor ___ Herbert Stearns tic science and Spanish; Edna Johns- D., spent the week-end with her Business Manager____Clifford Granos Advertising Mag.____Judine Sletvold gard, voice; Edith Hanson, piano. parents, Mr. and Mrs. J. P. Sletvold. Circulation Mgr.__Lawrence Peterson All teachers who applied for their REPORTERS positions for another year were re- CHAPEL EXERCISES Music _Esther Olbertson Faculty Miss Muus elected. Yet to be obtained, however, Athletics Julian Hoxeng Locals _Charlotte Johnson are a commercial teacher, a manual Chapel exercises was .conducted by Athletics Crystal Sogn and Mildred Halderson training instructor and a coach. Leif the Freshman class Marc. 15. The Dorothy Green College World Jeanette • Dale Humor Fjelstad, flashy Augustana cc-liege following program was rendered: And Hilman Williams Religion Laura Fjelland gridiron star of twa years ago., has Georgia Dixon Scripture reading, Col. II, 1-15— Gerda Schiager General News Alumni and Eunice Dale been mentioned as a prospective Bernice Hegness and Louise Youngren Typists Gena Twedt coach, but no definite action has yet Paper; Meditation"—Carmen Op- Forenseis. Tilford Twedt and Opal Rude been taken. sahl e Published Semi-Monthly. The official student publication of Augustana Reading—Hazel Dal Academy: Terms of subscription: $1.00 per year. Address all communications The following Tuesday the Ad- to the Editor-in-Chief and all matters of business to the Business Manager. vanced class gave a program consist- ing of a paper by Theola O'Banion, Entered as second class matter December 10, 1922, at the post office at Can- "Looking Unto Jesus". ton, South Dakota, under the act of March 3, 1879. Acceptance for mailing at the special rate of postage provided for in section 1163. Act of October 3, Looking urto Jesus we shall be like 1917, authorized March 14, 1922. Him for character is caught not Della Ingebrigtson . has returned to. taught. "Whom you >associate with, AUGUSTANA ACADEMY PLACE Walters, butler ____ Leonard Hagge school after being absent for some and what you do will determin e what THIRD AT N.L.C.A. TOURNAMENT Carrie—maid Jennie Varo time due to illness. you are," therefore, if we constantly lock to Jesus his glory will re reflect- Bertha Fossum visited with Grace 4SENIORS ENTERTAIN JUNIORS- ed in us and through us. (Continued from page 1) Wicks over the week-end. In conclusion Gordon Cowan gave IVIr. and Mrs. Albert Gustad visit- the consolation finals and third place (Continued from page 1) the reading "Better Pray It Through". by winning the rest of the games. e;1 with their daughter, Mathilda, on up their minds to do this Baby Annie Laurie Alice,Rommereim Sunday. - They .made D. O. R. and on 'Wednesday afternoon dotivnecl Grandpa and Grandma A number of the students attend- the speedy Madison quintet 13 to 6. Julian Hoxeng and Laura Fjelland ed the concert given by the Yankton The Daughters of the Reformation After the program all joined in College Mens Glee Club at the Con- On Wednesday morning at 11 a. in. met on Thursday evening, March 24. the Academy met Gale academy and playing games. At the close of the gregational church Wednesday. The following programt was given: were• doped to lose but easily came evening's entertainment • a delicious Anna Fjelland spent the week-end Ilymn—"0 Bread of Life From out ahead by the score of 24 to 13. lunch was served in keeping with visiting her sister. Laura. Heaven". In this game Gudmundson tore loose St. Patrick's day. The evening was Aleda Sogn is unable to return to and made eight field goals. one of complete enjoyment and the school this quarter because of the ill- Esther Lonning led in Scripture That evening the Academy had to Juniors feel that their upper classmen ness of her mother. Reading and Prayer, choosing her meet Park Region for the third place. are royal entertainers. Myrtle Eidem entertained on Wed- text, John 15, which tells of the con- Having played one game that day the • nesday evening at supper Anne Lyk- solation and mutual love between Academy team was not in extra good MISSION BAND ken, Esther Sommervold, Hazel Lok- Christ and His members, under the condition to play but took the fast ---- ken, Irene and Mildred Halderson. parable-of th e vine. Park Region team into camp 13 to 9. (Continued from page 1) Anna and Laura Fjelland and A beautiful piano solo was played This was a very fast game, marred , Esther Lonning were entertained at by Miss Hanson. days ys to come ? What confidence may only by she poor shooting of the dinner at the Sletvold home on Sun- Miss Haug gave ; a reading entitled Academy who missed a number of it give us, what guiding principle, day. "The Angelus" by Porter, which told what assurance ? nic e shots. Rev. Rothnem and family visited of how Martha had received a picture In the first place as we go into After this game the Luther Preps the Academy on Saturday. Rev. which was "Th e Angelus", but that e may draw out of mis- and • Pleasant View of Ottawa, Ill., the future, w Rothnem is to be the principal, at the when she first looked at it she saw das}:ed for first place. The Pleas- sionary experience the assurance that Academy the coming school year. no beauty in it. Ittwas- not u til _af- u+ ~r --X ant View team were in good trim and in this enterprise thele is a purify- Albert and Ralph Gunderson and ter having the picture before her eyes walked away with the. Preps 25 to 6.. ing infltience and guarantee of fresh Myron Gudmundsen visited at the for some time that she saw what it Preps were nat in their regular accession of clearer spiritual vision. The Academy Saturday. really meant and the beauty contain- form and did- not show the fight they Then the assurance that this enter- President H. M. Dale returned on ed in it. had previously shown. prise has the power to stimulate in Saturday from Chicago after having . There were a few moments of Sil- This ended the tournament, with non-christian lands intellectual awak- attended a conference of the North e.nt Prayer after which Hymn 63 was Pleasant View taking first place, erring and social movements of the Central Association of Colleges. sung. Th e meeting closed with the profoundest significance. Luther Preps second and Augustana The Misses Dahl; Johnsgaard, saying of the Mizpah. There is a third assurance, that is academy third. After everything was Haug, Rorstad, and • 'Hanson spent with reference to the power of the said and done our team thought Monday afternoon, March 14, at 'Sioux Christian enterprise to work mir- things had gone fairly well and if any Falls. THE SODA GRILL one tells them they can't play basket- acles of morals and spiritual trans Misses Mathilda Gustad and Bar- ball -they just pull out their bronze forgtation is countless individual lives. bara Johnson were Sunday dinner' In closing, she pointed out that we Woodward Candies in Bulk medals. guests of Mr. and Mrs. Andrew Hay- was can carry out of the past into the and_. Packages for Christmas The line up for the Academy nes. future once more assurance. The as- as follows: Miss Verna Husebo '26, a teacher surance that Christian enterprise R:F.—Leonard Hagge at Clark, S. D., visited relatives and constitutes one of the most dynamic L.F.—Clarence Gunderson friends in Canton over the week-end. ARMY GOODS agencies for providing a stable and C.—Oliver Gudmundson Gilmer Milli e arrived Sunday from 4 —and— adequate foundation for international G.—Rudolph Qualseth Minneapolis for a visit at his home GENERAL MERCHANDISE and inter-racial, friendliness and co- G:—Julian Hoxeng during a week's vacation from his. ' —Always a Saving-- operation." The substitutes were Idor Russett studies at the University of Minneso- Other numbers on the program Canton Army Store and Lawrence Johnson. ta. were a musical reading, "Rock of ■ The boys left St. Olaf about 8:30 ~ .. ~ ...... o.. .. ~ ...... ~ .g..~..~..~..~..~..~s~ Ages" by Esther Sommervold and a l +..a. ~ .. .. ~..~ ..~ .. ~ ~ ..a•a• ~ .. ..~.. ~ ..ry ~ ~ ..a• ~ ~ ~ ..a• ~ a.~ ..an•a. .. ~ a•~ ..a• ~ ~ ~ ..a• ~ a•~ ..a• ~ Friday morning and hit bad roads : reading by Carmen Opsahl. ,I . most of the way home. They arrived home a little after eight o'clock and NFW PRINCIPAL WILL old Augustana academy looked 1 VISERG UTTEN mighty good to seven pair of tired TAKE UP WORK JULY :
eyes that night. Lloyd Hokenstad coaches the team, (Continued from page 1) Publishing Co. to him must be given much of -and - was a pastor at Stanley, Wis., from : the credit for the showing made at 1911 to 1913; at Faribault; Minn., St. Olaf. He was always right on from 1913 to 1918; at Dell Rapids, S. hand when anything was to be clone D., from 1918 until the present time. and the team is very much indebted Rev. Rothnem is the author of "The Publishers of to him. . Deaf and the Lutheran Church". He is also a composer of note, most not- Visergutten and ..Canton Farmers Leader SENIOR CLASS PLAY able of his production perhaps being a cantata written for the Norse Cen- (Continued from page 1) tennial exposition last year. He was Printers of Gladys Kloster married in 1911 to Angie Isabelle 0 Mrs. Simple-hotisekceper at Lock Gordon. Vidnesbyrd fra Broderkredsen School and Home Willow Farm Mina Twedt In addition to his duties as princi- : • Orphans: Sadie Kate (Thea Peterson, pal of Augustana academy, Rev. Dovregubben Gladiola (Myrtle Su11_estad), Loretta. Rothnem will teach religion and 0 The Clarion (Alice Rom'niereim, Mamie (L THE CLARION the attraction? Seems to be several. Lawrence J.—To' experience the wint to wurruk en the farm, .and. Fools Will Be Foots • sensation of being on the Honor Roll. larnt how to run an injune for an The Red Red Robin has come Bob Clarenc e E.—To get at least just owld hayseed what was always chaw- It is now April first—all fools day. B ob Bobbin along• so guess spring is one A. • in and spittin' aruond. Oi didn't git That is why I am writing this. You here. on very fast at that fer whiniver s e all know that some heroes are born, THE PROFESSOR was travilin' the farmer allus wanted some made; but all mankind are fools. It has been rumored that the stud- me to revarse the injune every toll ne I know right well that some will not ents are planning on striking for I married a college professor to help he wanted tobaccer. And so I bot a agree hence I will try to verify my longer hours and more work. him keep track of his mind, farm and went to wurruk fer meszlf. statement by a few illustrations. To • keep him frdm_ shaving his poodle. But av coarse, I wasn't on to al). the One common conception I have dis- Some certain few have been plan- and tieing his necktie behind, tricks of the thrade. I wasn't shire covered through my experiences with ning to vacate for a few weeks to see To keep him from. pouring the water whither butter banes or butter n..c'ts companions at Augustana academy if the school could actually keep go- from his shaving mug into the bed made the bist butter so I wus and elsewhere is this—That when ing without them. Tak e our advice: And throwing himself from the win- both of 'em one day in me gya'x•.Ien you are together with somebody you Don't do it for it may disprove your dow to fall on his erudite head. whin a Billy good hum along just as are able to study and learn what kind egoism. • I'd a feeling that I must prevent him _I was bindin' down. Since that try' nle of an individual you have to deal from quenching his thirst with the I've thot of I want to go into the with. This is what at least eighty- It's a good thing Bacon isn't living ink, butter business, there are animals nine and nine-tenths of the men say in our day and age and attending Then putting his hat on the bottle that are better at it thin ayther naats and ninety-nine and" ninety-nine one Augustana' academy for it is feared and pouring himself down the sink. er banes. he. and Sam would have some rather hundredths of the women. That er- I was sure I could never recover if I planted milkwades and straw- roneous conception alone is enough heated arguments judging from he put his umbrella t o bed, berries nixt to each other so they to prove they are fools, because it Sam's reactions to Bacons Essays. And stood up all night in the hat wuld cross and I cut have strawber- is impossible for anyone on this earth rack with a band buttoned tight ries and crame. to know what kind of an individual WHO'S WHO AT THE around , his head. I saved soni c lig'..tnin g bugs and I am. AUGUSTANA ACADEM Y I married a college professor to help put them in the bee-hive so the '_:fight- People think it is so funny that him keep track of his mind, ing bugs wed go out sparkin' wid things can be made to move in the The Cooks—They're the ones that But he_ honeymooned off with a porter the bees and oe wuld get the bencr:its air but the truth of the matter is that put the dough in the doughnuts and and tipped me and left me behind. av de honey-moon. only a man who is barefooted is on the apples in apple sauce. —Exchange. Wunce I got mad and I grabbed up the ground, shows what fool ideas The Faculty—They're the ones that a brick-bat and slammed it thrt the people will have. Further, people ask _put i in misery. DON'T USE BIG WORDS kitchen windy and wad ye believe me, questions that any fool can answer or Your Friend—He's the guy that the very instant the brick struck the no man can answer. , One day I Put hope in hopeless. In promulgating your esoteric cog- glass the pane wuz all gone. chanced to meet two girls. One of 'Sam B.—IIe's the guy that put the itations and in articulating your su- - The publishers are in haiste fer ,_,y them said, "What do you think about wit in witty. perficial sentimentalities and amic- Ought-to-be-Ography- 'fer histry class, so if we wud__larn _4 — -- -- ?" The other answered Miss Lium—She's the one that put able philosophical or psychological about me kum to Patrick O'Flah.-:r .j, "Oh, she's just a fool like the rest the act in activity. observations beware of platitudinous of us." - Olaf—He's so bright his father ponderosity. Let your conversational Esq. U 8 1 2 Green Apple Last night I came into a room calls him "Son". communications possess a clarified where I found a couple fools. What Mina Twedt—She's th e one that conciseness, a compacted comprehen- do you suppose they were doing ex- put the art in — The Saga. sibleness, coalescent consistency, and HUMOR cept strining their lingo to see who Gordon—He's the guy that put the a concatentated cogency. Eschew all had the other outwinded. But they bet in better. conglomerations of flatulent garrul- WE KNOW THEM BY- were only fooling themsevles. Miss Muus—She's the one that put ity, jejune babblement, asinine affec- Sam—Baby face One night, the Dean of men enter the B in Biology. tions. Let your extemporaneous des- Matilda G.—Ain't love grand? ed Room 40, on fourth floor, and Judine-rHe's the guy that put the cantings and unpremeditated expatia- ,Ferne N.—That superior attitude found the inmate lying on his bed. ad in advertise. tions have intelligibility and veracious Olive G.—Those perfect recitations Said the dean, "Haven't you anything Pete—He's the guy that put the vivacity without rhedomontade or Cowan—The would-be shiek? to do?" The inmate answered, "Yes, bit in ambitious. thasonical bombast. Sedulously avoid Ruth K.—Oh, that Barberry 7r-an! but I am too busy to start." Olive G.—She's the one" that put all polysyllabic profundity, pompuous Twedt—"I'll Make the McNasy- From .what I know (which, by the the can in can't. prolixity, psittaceous vacuity, ventril- Haugen bill go through yet." way is a great deal) there are two "Dickie"—She's the one that put oquial verbasity, and vaniloquent va- Charlotte—Dady Long Legs! classes of fools. The first class is the err in error. pidity. Shun double ententes, pruri- •Pete—Where did you get that composed of those who think they Miss Dahl—She's the one that put ent jocosity and pestiferous profan- ring? know everything and don't know any- determine in determination. ity, obscurant or apparent. In other Miss Johnsgaard—"Let . me -call thing. In the other class are those 'Tis very true - words, talk plainly, briefly, naturally, Sou sweetheart?" who think they don't know anything That among Who's Who sensibly, purely, and truthfully. Keep Olaf 0.—The academy bluffer and in fact know as much as possible. These names no doubt belong from slang, do not put on airs, say John C.—Those paper dolls. Which of these classes do you be- But these few more what you mean, mean what you say long to ? I consider the majority of We would like to score and Dont Use Big Words.' Miss Linstad,`--Now classy ilvarde, the people I have met the few years That we may not say wrong. tell me why we are going to study I have spent here on this earth be-, Who put the diction in dictionary? "THE OUGHT-TO-BE-OGRAPHY geography? longing to the first class, but there Who put the dig in dignity? OF PATRICK O'FLAHERTY Cliff.—To find out if we are on the are a few, I must admit, who belong Who put the cad in academy? map. to the other class. Oi was borin in good owld Ireland Now, since we are all fools, and SECRET AMBITIONS Wan day whin I was young, Mr. Emmons (in Physics clåss-- undoubtedly always will lie, let us not An' that's phyw all the boys 'n girls Please tell me the unit of electricity. go around and make fun of a fool be- Judine—To be on time for History All tease m e with their tongue Jenny—The what ? cause you are only making fun of class. On resembled much me father Mr. Smmonds—Correct. yourself. Olaf—To become a minister. So all did thin avow, You might think or say I am a fool Esther J.—To be serious. And the girruls all run to kiss me, Miss Rorstad (proceeding to the for writing this—which I admit I Thora M.—To be Dean of Women. But they niver do it now. dormitory from the "gym" with a am—hut if you have read this you Rudolph Q.—To teach Latin. group of girls during a fusillade of are a greater fool. John C.—To join the circus. Just hear th e. po'try runnin' awt. snowballs from the boys )—H rry —A Contribution Ralph S.—To become basketball All great things begin with po'try. girls, or you'll be killed alive. coach. That's phwy I begin my, aught-to-be- Mother (questioning little son who Dorothy G.—To graduate. Ography wid it. They say Johnny just cane from church) : Sonny, what Anne L.—To get some mail once in Milton begin his grate "Paradise was the preacher's text? a while. - Lost" wit it. I don't know. I never Son: "Don't worry; you will get a Several of us—To "get through" read it and they say that's where I quilt." without studying. _ lost awt. a• The mother was puzzled; so when The way some students "rave on" Tilford T.—To give a lecture tour 1 Whin I was a boy they used to say the daughter came home she asked in class you'd actually think they had- in Norway. that every man should paddle his her the same question. The dauerter read their lessons. Agnes J.—To grow a few inches.• own canoe. Be jobers it kipt me said: "Fear not, the comforter will Gordon—To "get something over" guessin whose canoes I was, fer me come".—Ex. Life is a monotonous round, before on somebody. • mother an' dad n' the skool- masther —o-- you can get down to work you have Sam B.—To make a few real all samed to considther it their spa- Mother: Willie what was yo ur to get up. friends in this world. cial duty to paddle me. Sunday school lesson about? Miss Liurn—To have something to I came to Americy. Ye ask me how Willie: About a bear, mother, .:Zed Many men are quick to 'embrace do once in a while. I kum widout any money. Will, I its name was "Gladly". an opportunity—when it's wearing Miss Rorstad-To hav e room 22 got a long stiff shilaly and bate me Mother: A bear! Aren't you '`r a - frills. unlocked so she can begin psychology way. I taken ? Class at 8 o'clock in the morning. Oi went to Boston and intered Har- Willie: No, mother, it was all about It has been said that men don't Teachers in general—To have stud- vard College. I went clane throe and Gladly, the cross-eyed bear (Gladly, hide behind women's skirts as much ents read their lesson before class. tuk the Masters Degree. It wus the cross I'd bear).—Ex. as they used to—well women hardly Students in general—To be able to hangin' on the wall wid a gowld top —o— , do. tell the teacher something or to on it and a dimun at the' bottom and Happiness is a perfume that ; cn "stick" her on something. the swift-silver climbing up to Po. cannot pour on others without getting Seems that many members of the Reidar A.—To become President of But just then the cop kum and I a° few drops on yourself.—Ex. , male sex down town) have become Augustana academy and possibly of dropped the degree and took me de- —0— much inteersted in cultivating their the United States. parture instid and I had to run like Teacher: "Henry, what is zinc'?" voices lately. Some even come up Mathilda—To have no • classes be- GO. . Henry: "That's the French pro for two or three lessons a day. What's fore dinner so she can sleep. Whin I finished my eddication I nounciation for think." 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CANTON, S. r)AK. : : ••• • •• THE NEW COLORS •• ••o Harold Lloyd in t : ••••4 • : ••••• ! •• • "The Kid Brother" are as interesting as the styles in : His Newest Feature Comedy APRIL 4, 5 and 6 : c • •••••••••••••■••••••». ,•••••.•••-••••-•••.•».»•••.•••••••-••• e ••••• e •••.•••••.••.••.•••.••••-••.••.••.•••••.•:••••••••••••••••••••4••4.•4.•••-4••..••.••• .. : dart Schaffner & Marx y...-.•.. o • • • • • •.. • •. •...•. •.. • . • •. •.. • •. • • •. •. • • •. • • • e. • • •. • • • b.. • • . • •. • •. • • • • • • • •. t.. •.. •.. •. • •. • • • • • • . • . • • •, o •. • . • •.. • .. • • • •.. • .. • • • 4 .. • . • • .. • • • • .. • .. • • • •. + ' • ; • FALL SUITS—$29.50 and 835.00 : Puckett-McAnally Co. 4. SMART SPRING MILLINERY • å : 4. FeaturedFriday and Saturday ~.~,. 4. _ 0 ~ At $4.95 and $6.95 TiiE. MOST'FOR - YOUR M O mn ' all the new spring shades, also black and white combination : i : : 4. 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