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Episode 26: “I Am Not the Fine Man You Take Me For.”

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Episode 26: “I Am Not the Fine Man You Take Me For.” Episode 26: “I Am Not the Fine Man You Take Me For.” Directed by: Dan Attias Written by: David Milch and Regina Corrado Transcribed by Cristi Brockway Free Fuckin’ Gratis for the Fans. (Late at night, Al lays awake in bed, we hear a drunken hooplehead in the thoroughfare speechifying…) Hooplehead: I am not the fine man you take me for. No no. (He paces back and forth in front of the hustings…climbing up as Al turns to his side in bed.) I come in April to sell a string of horses and try my luck in the streams. What I got for the stock I lost at the wheel, and the flake I washed up I drank the fuck away. I don’t know as I’ll get home at all. I sold my boots. I owe $9 to a whore. (The wood creaks as the man tumbles over the side of the hustings, breaking his neck as he lands in the muck of the thoroughfare. Al awakens early the next morning, and looks out the window. Moments later, He, Dan, and Johnny are surveying the scene in the nearly deserted thoroughfare.) Johnny: It looks like he fell off the platform. Dan: It’s just a broke-necked hoople, Al. Al: That he posed us no threat was the judgment you come to even as you fuckin’ snored. Dan: Turns on watch, Johnny, until this Goddamn Hearst business settles out. Al: And not that we lack options like the sleep from which none awaken. (Johnny turns and starts walking back to the Gem, revealing his bumcheeks peeking through his open flap) Would you close your flap, that I don’t forego my boiled eggs? (Upstairs in the Grand Central, Hearst finishes drawing up a letter, seals it with wax and hands it to Captain Turner, who leaves. At the house that Bullock built, he and Martha are drinking their morning tea by the stove.) Martha: Do you believe the speeches will be delivered tonight? Seth: The speeches—the elections are hostage to the business of the camp, which is bloody…murderous. (He lifts his cup, furrowing his brow) And, you know…I don’t like this tea. Martha: Too cool? Seth: It’s too weak. Martha: I do not make weak tea. Seth: I oughtn’t to tease (chuckles – Martha looks at him incredulous) I like mine unusually strong. Martha: You might have said, Seth. It’s an easy thing to fix. Seth: You’re right. Martha: I’m not a mind reader. Seth: I’ve said it now. Martha: My goodness. Transcribed by Cristi Brockway Free Fuckin’ Gratis for the Fans. (She sets down her tea cup, gives him a subtle smile and turns back to the stove. Seth looks at her back a moment and reaches out to caress her neck, their eyes meet briefly, she turns back to the stove and his caress cascades down her back, resting on her bustle. Back in the house that the Bonanza bought, Alma lays in bed, Doc is packing up his tools.) Alma: How am I? Doc: I could wish your symptoms further remitted. Alma: I find your answer vague. Doctor, has your medicine dulled my favulties or do you wish to cloud your meaning? Doc: You don’t do as well as I’d hoped. (Alma looks stricken) Alma: Am I know losing my baby? Doc: My opinion is you will. And your symptoms make it prudent to intervene. You’re pained at the stomach. Alma: I’d—I’d laid that to—to your medicine slowing my digestion. Doc: The spasm in the muscles of your belly doesn’t owe to slowed digestion. And while you are bleeding less, that you bleed at all with pain at the abdomen argues against further delay. Alma: Have I time to see to certain arrangements? Doc: May I begin to see to mine? (Alma nods weakly, Doc heads downstairs where Ellswroth and Sofia are playing slaphands. Doc wheezes, coughs as he descends the stairs. He looks at Ellsworth and shakes his head.) I should be back in about…an hour and a half’s time. (Ellsworth looks stricken as Doc leaves. Sofia grabs his hands as if to play again, he holds hers.) Ellsworth: Put your school things together, little one. (Back at the Gem, Dan, Silas, Al and Johnny are sitting around the bar, waiting. Al pours his coffee.) Dan: If we know Hearst is coming, Boss, why the fuck don’t we strike first? Al: From the moment we leave the forest, Dan, it’s all a giving up and adjusting. Dan: Across the thoroughfare to slit that cocksucker’s throat. Al: We forego the rock for the dagger, learn distraction’s use and deceptions before the dagger is employed—spirits, women, games of chance. Dan: I’m older, and I’m much less friendly to fuckin’ change. Al: Change ain’t lookin’ for friends. Change calls the tune we dance to. (Captain Turner steps into the doorway. Dan steps forward.) Where are you going? (Captain Turner steps up behind Al.) Whiskey, Cap’n? (Turner hands him the envelope, and leaves.) (Joanie enters Cy’s room at the Bella Union. She retrieves the tray by his bed.) Cy: Morning, Miss Sunshine. Joanie: Mornin’, Cy. (She sets the tray down and helps him sit up in bed, propping a pillow behind him.) Transcribed by Cristi Brockway Free Fuckin’ Gratis for the Fans. Cy: What can you tell a man at the margin of things? Reason for these cancelled speeches? Joanie: I don’t know why they was cancelled. Cy: You seem a little sour. Don’t think lying here these weeks, I ain’t had my dark moments. Thank God I took this book up again. Joanie: If it really brings you peace, then I’m glad. Cy: Hell, yes, it brings me peace. Do you doubt that? Joanie: I try to believe. Cy: You want to read something with me, Honey? Joanie: “Same as you want to find a different way, then why couldn’t Cy?” Cy: Getting gut-stabbed by a Minister of God will bring you to examine your path. Joanie: But I don’t. (She chokes back tears) I had a gun to my ear at Shaunessy’s yesterday. Cy: What the hell were you doing at Shaunessy’s? Joanie: Staying away from here. Cy: You listen to me, young lady. What brings a gun to the temple is lack of gainful occupation and of being useful to others! I don’t see you try to kill yourself here. All you do here is good for the girls, and me too. Joanie: I don’t want to run women no more. Cy: And that’s turning from your gift and your training! Joanie: When you speak, I feel like it’s the devil talking. Cy: Ain’t that a lovely thing to hear yourself accused of? (a knock at the door, door opens.) Con: Excuse me, Mr. T, but fucking Lila’s in extremis. Cy: Jesus Christ! Con: Ought I get the Doc? Leon seems over his head. (Joanie leaves.) Cy: She’ll see to it. Con: Yeah. (he nods and leaves, closing the door.) Cy: Try to stay afloat from the fuckin’ sickbed., have to listen to something like that. (Joanie wipes tears from her eyes as she walks through the downstairs of the Bella Union, looking for Lila. She finds her outside on the porch, Leon holding her up.) Joanie: Get the fuck inside, Leon, before I take out my gun and kill you! (She shoves Leon out of the way and grabs Lila from him.) Leon: Joanie this ain’t the way it looks. Joanie: Get inside or get shot! Leon: Well, hold her up then! Got a long fuckin’ way to fall down. Lila: Let me die, Joanie. Joanie: Start walking, you lousy whore. Start walking. (Jane walks out of the Chez Amie, slamming the door behind her and swaggering outside. She takes a moment, hands on her hips, facing Mose, hesitating momentarily before speaking.) Jane: Slept inside, in case you wasn’t aware. Miss Stubbs’ request. Thought she’d try someone competent keeping watch. (She grabs a watering can.) Transcribed by Cristi Brockway Free Fuckin’ Gratis for the Fans. Mose: She’s off to the Bella Union. Jane: I can’t worry about her right now. Can you just help me lug in the fucking water? I’m for the day off the bottle and about to bathe. Mose: (Standing) Camp get up a petition? (Inside the Gem, Dan is staring at the sketch Hearst had delivered, trying to puzzle it out. Al sips his coffee, calmly. Dan looks at Johnny, Johnny rolls his eyes to the paper, having no idea what it means. Dan looks up at Silas, who shakes his head in befuddlement too. As I would if I found out you paid some cocksucker for this transcript. Google “Deadwood Transcripts” and you’ll find ‘em for free.) Dan: I can sniff this all you want, Boss, but I—I ain’t got one fuckin’ scintilla of an idea what these marks mean. Al: What if that’s the door of our joint? Johnny: (Walking to the table.) That would make this line the bar. (Pointing to the line on the left side of the paper.) Silas: What would that make the Xs? Al: Murderers? (The boys get a look of shock dawning on them.) See to your task with the Jew. (Silas leaves, Johnny nods as if he’s got it all figured out, Dan looks worried.
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