925 - Weekly Thursday 22Nd January 1998 Students Union Neglects Minorities, Say Consultants

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Issue 925 - Weekly Thursday 22nd January 1998 Students Union neglects minorities, say consultants

1st year student A new report has found weaknesses Union in many areas and highlights those in need provided by the Students’ Union, there is com- in the way the Students’ Union caters of some urgent action. paratively little information about it’s perfor- dies during for minority groups. The report, mance”. It highlighted that “establishing the per- Christmas holiday which was published over the week- This project was undertaken to review all the centage of the whole students body who regular- end, is based on interviews with a activities of the SU, provide a development plan ly visit the building gives an indication of the for the next two years and suggest a method for take-up of the whole range of Students’ Union cross-section of Surrey students, as services”. The introduction of ‘swipe card’ 1st year psychology stu- well as statistics. The conclusions so continuous assessment. Controversy erupted at dent died after being hit by the Executive Committee last semester when entrance system using ID cards was suggested a far praise the Union in many areas, Aa train the weekend before these plans were first proposed, with many offi- method for establishing usage patterns and the last. but warn that a huge number of mem- cers unhappy with the initial cost of Modules 1 Consultants recommend that this is course of bers - especially some overseas, and 2. With the fees totalling £18,000 it was felt action is “pursued vigorously by the students’ 19 year-old Sarah Kirby, who lived postgraguate and part-time students, that maybe this was work that the Union could do union”. in Cathedral court, was struck and are not being properly catered for, itself. However, considering the company’s killed instantly by a Portsmouth to and are often unaware of what is experience working with other Students’ Unions The student’s overall impression of the Union Waterloo train at the southern end going on..... and the staff’s current workload, a compromise ranged from “many students on campus did not of platform 3, Guildford Station. was struck where only Modules 1 and 2 would be see any reason to go into the Union during the day” to “it was not generally seen as an inviting The incident is being investigated Mark Stuart ordered. A further decision on Modules 3 and 4 by Transport Police and the local would be made once we had received the results environment to spend time in”. The food and Coroners Office. of Modules 1 and 2. beer prices were, as expected, criticised for being EL Consultants, with vast experience of too expensive, yet when compared to other analysing Students’ Unions across the University Deputy Secretary After talking to Union Officers, staff and a small Unions across the country our income per head country, last week reported their findings James Strawson issued a statement C select sample of students CEL Consultants was well above the national average. This should on the Modules 1 and 2 commissioned by Union saying that “the Vice-Chancellor reported that “considering the range of services be compared with the price of drinks, “which are Officers last semester. The report criticises the has written to Sarah’s family to - Continued on Page 3, col. 1 express the deepest sympathy of all members of the University University presses on with flagship building community on her death. It is believed that Sarah’s tragic death he University is embarking was unconnected with her studies on its most expensive build- at the University. The University Ting project ever. appreciates that Sarah’s sudden The new building, over 65 metres death will be especially felt by her high and costing about £10 million friends in Cathedral Court and her is being constructed to house fellow first year students in the EIHMS nursing students from Department of Psychology.” The September 1999. Development statement goes on to list staff who Director Dr Steve Baker is confi- may be contacted by people who dent that the University has learned feel they need advice and support its lessons from building bodges in following the tragedy. the past, and says that the building will be finished on time. Designed Dr John Hobrough, Dean of by Nicholas Grimshaw & Partners, Students Ext 3148 responsible for the RAC headquar- ters in Bristol, the Eurostar terminal Mrs Helen Veasey and Mrs at Waterloo, station and Zurich Kunu Gordon, Counselling Airport, the building is to look “like Service Ext 2230 the prow of a ship” from Guildford town, and a space shuttle from The Chaplins Ext 2754 above. The project includes exten- sive landscaping, for outdoor The Student Union President events and concerts. and Student Affairs Officer Next Week: Bare Facts will be publishing sketches & plans of the building. Ext 9227 / 9228 Contractors at work on the site adjacent to the Students’ Union building. The new project it to be completed by April 1999. Photo - Matt Pannell

News 1 n Features 3 n Letters 4 n Music 6 n Entertainments Guide 7 . Cinema and Arts 8 n Union News 9 n Notices & Personals 9 n Sport 12 . ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:16 Page 2 (1,1)

2 News Thursday 22nd January 1998 n Farmers thrash The news in brief Jack Cow-ningham! NUS calls for shutdown

US have announced a and higher Education Bill, reached cally affected by the Government’s has cut of a lot of their trade. This, nation-wide ballot for a the report and committee stage in plans. Steven Alexander combined with the recent ban on Nday-long shutdown of fur- the house of Lords on Tuesday. beef on the bone has all but deci- ther and higher education establish- Dates have yet to be set for the next The Students’ Union is currently armers protested in London mated the British beef market. ments later this month. The shut- stages of the legislation. considering plans for participa- on Tuesday against “mount- Meanwhile, the strong pound has down, in protest against the intro- Just before Christmas the tion in the shut-down. Write and Fing indifference” and a lack caused an influx of imported meat duction of tuition fees, is the next in Government revealed university let us know what you think... of support from the Government. and agricultural goods, damaging a series of protests following on applications are down by 20,000 – a The protest was given by 3000 the whole of the industry. Their aim from the demonstrations in drop the size of approximately four Jeff Blackham farmers who attended a conference was, as one banner suggested, November. Universities. The NUS believe the at Central Methodists Great Hall, “‘Bullocks’ to Europe”. The Government’s plans to intro- application to and take up of Westminster and then went on to Farmer’s private property is also duce fees, as part of the Teaching University places will be dramati- Downing Street to unload sacks of under threat. The “Right to Roam” petitions. Sir David Naish, act is being rushed through the leg- President of the National Union of islature, which will give people the Oxford students are dunces Farmers said that these petitions right to traipse through farmer’s were a “welcome vote of support in lands and fields. With all these mea- hey are meant to be the spelling is ‘relative.’ Yet perhaps the worst example of the farming community”. The pro- sures being taken, the National brightest academic minds in In a list of 140 so-called ‘howlers’ all is the confusion between doesn’t testers also herded two cows out- Union of Farmers feel the the country, but students at made by first-year English and dosen’t. (The second one is side the Houses of Parliament Government is holding a vendetta T Oxford are dunces when it comes to Language and Literature students in wrong incidentally.) where the farming community were against them. “Most of those people basic spelling. 1995 examinations were errors such Mr Richards does attempt to set the lobbying MPs after the conference. in Westminster who make the deci- So is the claim made by a recent ex- as, ‘angery,’ skepticle’ and ‘redicu- article in context though, comment- One farmer told Bare Facts; “There sions haven’t even been to the teacher in an article in the lous.’ ing, seems that there’s no support for country, never mind worked a farm. University’s scholar’s journal, Candidates seemed unaware of the “If this is what’s going on at British products anymore. We rely For the past 60 years its been them Oxford Magazine. problems with, ‘padel’ (paddle), Oxford, God knows what everyone on the beef trade and it has been that have been messing things up, Bernard Richards, a fellow and for- ‘greatfully’ (gratefully) and else is doing.” taken away from us. We rely on our fiddling about and making our lives mer English tutor at Brasenose ‘exceleriting’ (accelerating). Some Perhaps he has a point. subsidies and they are going to be difficult.” College, Oxford lays blame for the apparently used ‘styles’ to climb taken away from us too. I’d like to The rally was a tremendous success declining standards partly with the over fences and would not be at all Andrew Goodacre get that Jack Cunningham and those for the union, at least in the short influence of ‘professional linguists’ surprised to see a ‘cannon’ taking a Eurocrats and give them a piece of term. They have demonstrated that who believe that correctness of service in a Cathedral. my mind.” they have huge support and that The farming union was rallying to their anger is justified; their liveli- draw awareness to the plight of hoods are at stake. As for any last- British farmers. Many farmers are ing influence, it will be difficult to New Anglichap for University starting to run out of options and tell, although it seems unlikely that money. Jack Cunningham’s threat the Government will make any pro- The on-going beef ban in Europe found changes in their policies. Robin Harvey and his wife, Suzy, are on campus as Robin joins Judith Rossall, Heather Fulford and Richard Frost in the Chaplaincy team. No strangers to Surrey, Robin lectured here in Human Biology and Suzy trained as a Health Visitor, both in the 1970’s. Robin hopes staff who know him won’t bring too many skeletons out of his biological cupboard. Their daughter, Joanna, is a final year psychologist at Warwick. Robin aims to keep the profile of the Chaplaincy high, working closely with the Welfare team. At this time of image-consciousness he feels the caring atmosphere of the University and the well-being of students and staff matter as much as the pursuit of excellence in teaching, learning and research. Having a purpose in life and feeling valued are vitally important ingredients of our spiritual life. Suzy agrees and sees her work in Health Promotion and lifestyle management as a way of contributing to this. Robin claims to have belonged to one of the very few underground theological societies in the country. He used to go caving with his Parishioners under the Mendip Hill, south of Bristol. For relaxation he likes adventurous and sporting physical challenges. With not a cave in sight around here, he is looking for interesting alternatives. Any suggestions?! Robin Harvey will be licensed as the new Anglican Chaplain to the University at a special Cathedral Evensong Service on Saturday 24th January at 4pm. Why not come along to welcome our new Chaplain and meet Robin, Suzy and Joanna at the reception afterwards? All are welcome. New campaign to hit harder

Advertise the social as well as the mote the campaign as they are seen affect them socially, with their health risks of taking illegal drugs is as an ‘intimate and trusted’ media friends, family, future careers and the new approach taken by the for this age group according to pastimes.” Health Education Authority (HEA) research. The advertisements will appear in the fight against teenage drug Building on the success of the pre- between January and April in a taking as a 13 year old boy is found vious press advertising campaign, range of magazines aimed at the dead from opiate abuse in Scotland which portrayed an anatomical dia- teenage age group such as Smash making him the youngest so far to gram with notes, the new press Hits, Shoot and J17 with ‘vox pop’ die in the British Isles. advertising will “be using the ‘cut- radio campaigns also running on Aimed at 11 to 15 year olds, the new away’ device to highlight the social Atlantic 252, Kiss and Capital stance, costing £1.8 million, is the and health risks that people face Radio. latest development in the HEA’s when taking drugs”, HEA drugs award-winning national drugs and campaign manager Geof Webb said. Sophie Rocks solvents education programme “We want to show young people “Know the Score”. Radio and teen that it is not just their health that is magazines have been chosen to pro- at risk but taking drugs can also ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:16 Page 3 (1,1)

n Thursday 22nd January 1998 Features 3

- Continued from page 1 “beer vodka, fun, expensive, caring, sociable said to be amongst the highest in the UK”. and Friday Night Out”. So, it’s clear that the At last - launderette gets Some students questioned also felt that the immediate reaction to the Union is positive. “there was not enough subsidisation and that the concentration on making a profit was When Mrs. Jackie Mellor, lead consultant of a revamp paramount rather than meeting student the project was asked to comment on the neg- needs”. Whilst students recognised that ative nature of the findings she said, “There drinking was the ‘student thing’, there were a are also many positive points that we noted. It number of students who felt that this “exclud- is a developing Union, one with a lot of scope Over the Christmas ed them from the Union”. Also it was thought for growth. We are helping by pointing areas vacation, the that the Union was not addressing the needs that need improvement and this should not be Accomodation Office of overseas students, especially with enter- taken as negative criticism just constructive refitted the campus tainments and support services. feedback which will help prioritise areas for launderette. the development plan to make the Union bet- Accomodation man- There was generally low awareness of any ter able to serve it’s diverse membership”. support services offered by the Union, ager Richard Paxton is hoping to introduce although those who had been to Welfare were President Nevin ‘Bob’ Moledina yesterday “very positive about the attitude of the people said “We have known all along that there are ‘special offer’ periods they had seen”. This aside, the location in the so many things to be improved, but where do where the price of a Communications Office was seen as inappro- you start and what takes the priority when you wash will be cheaper, priate and the Welfare sections already find- have got so many other things to get done? in the hope that ing it difficult to manage the current case- CEL can help us.” demand for the facility work. will even out. There The most eagerly awaited results came from The Union has received a fair bit of stick but are also plans to intro- the views on entertainments at Surrey. The it’s necessary to remember that these are com- respondents were generally positive about duce a ‘service wash’ ments from a very small sample of students so where laundry can be entertainments but it was felt that more vari- it’s not as bad as it seems. A lot of the com- handed in and collect- Unlike the old machines, In use the machines seemed ety is needed. Prices of events at the Union ments we already knew but there were sever- these do not permit the cus- fine, although drying takes came in for some criticism as did the difficul- al areas where we were not aware such prob- ed later. Andy Gale tomers to gaze at the swirling longer in the new machines ties encountered purchasing a drink on Friday lems existed. The only way to carry this for- tested out the new garments and enjoy the mild- (but the price per minute is nights. Friday Night Outs and Silly Nights ward and progress is to pursue Module 3 and launderette, and ly hypnotic effects. lower). An average sized cat proved to be the most popular nights, while conduct the largest survey of student opinion reports back.... Furthermore, the somewhat needed about twenty minutes the Saturday night SHAG was “generally per- here at Surrey in the last 10 years. ceived negatively.” The students felt that the fter cruelly moving evil tumble driers rub salt in the new driers, compared type of music and the price of entry dissuaded the computers out of into the wound by showing in to fifteen minutes in the old big digits the number of min- driers. Campus mammals people from attending. However, when asked - See Also Page 5 - Decision time Athe Mullen’s build- which words they would use to describe the ing, and thereby removing utes of boredom left. The fact (rabbits, squirrels) take union, the most commonly used words were the ability to while away that the number of machines around twelve minutes, and washday tedium by e-mail- has been increased at least small birds (sparrows, BF ing, Senate has increased the tenfold will be of little conso- secretary Sarah) take nine Greensocs top tips for misery of launderette users lation to students now forced minutes - but remember to by installing new machines. to read course texts to while remove the feathers from the the new year the time away. filter afterwards.

Food: Energy and buildings: Buy organic produce when possible. For Don’t leave lights and appliances on unneces- details of your nearest organic box scheme, sarily - turn them off! contact GreenSoc through the Union pigeon Heating - turn it down, and think twice about holes. putting it on. Oh, and for everyone in halls Support local produce - food from overseas this year, no, it’s not very eco-friendly to open costs dearly in terms of food miles and the the windows rather than turning off the radia- environment. tor. Action: Join a local environmental group. GreenSoc Shopping: meets every Tuesday evening in the Teaching Boycott goods with excess packaging. Block. Locally, asides from GreenSoc there is Remember the three R’s: reuse, repair and a very nice Friends of the Earth group. For recycle. further details about either group, contact Try to buy recycled goods (eg writing paper) GreenSoc. wherever possible. Remember - Week 2 is green week Oh no, its back: The Silly Spot

o Ho Ho, it’s LIFE week respect oth- ing projections, a TV Washing machine, ers, respect nature, make the world a video nasties and many more bits and pieces. Hbetter place - week 2, so the Silly People have the Bar FTSE. Prices varying Stop throwing away crap - bring it to the with the basics of supply and demand. Union and do something useful with it.

Feet aside we also have a whole shed load of The rest of the week is wicked too - Pedal recycled junk to transform into elegant art- Powered Unplugged on Tuesday and obvi- forms expressing the discontinuity between ously the GREEN SHAG with the most com- consumerism and gaia - building recycled fortable chill out room ever - the LURVE decor for the Saturday GREEN SHAG. LOUNGE. Bring some stuff - that stack of empty beer cans lining your window, and build. There’s Happy New Year...... The Fool. also face painting, music from the mother eye of “Shamanic Tribes on Acid”, enchant- ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:16 Page 4 (1,1)

4 Letters/Editorial Thursday 22nd January 1998 n Editorial Your Letter(s) extra-marital affairs. Ironically, the events Friday nights have never been so hard.... could prove beneficial to Saddam Hussein as the old coalition of governments ranged Dear Editor, term, (yes, I know it was exams time), the against him starts to break up. And as the air- dance floor took way too long to fill up, and craft carriers arrive in the Gulf, the whole point As some concerned student already pointed out in last weeks issue, what is happening to when it did it still was not very alive. In fact, of the inspection programme - to find out what I was so disappointed that I left before mid- is going on at secret bases - has been lost. It’s entertainment at Surrey? As it has already been mentioned, tracks are night. FNO are just not what they used to be, time to look for some new inspectors. Where with music catering for all tastes. Now it is can they be found? If you forget the US, the harder than they used to be, and as a regular FNO goer over the last three years, I can only DJ’s Hard Track FNO. UK, and Iraq itself, just about anywhere else in Also, and I believe I am not the only person the world would do. say that I am disappointed. Some people will no doubt say something like “but the Union concerned, the music at the Union on a FNO Bare Facts gets tweaked was full!” has never been this bad. Of course it is full on a FNO whatever is So, can we please have FNO music on a - and theres more to played! There is not much else to do on a FNO, i.e. mainstream and party music, or Friday after pubs close, unless you are ready will it be DJ Hard Track for ever after! come to spend much more money down town, and on top of that risk being beaten up by the José Texidor-Carlsson ver the holidays, Bare Facts production local gangs or bouncers. Before the end of Iraq: why make things people have been busy making a few Oimprovements to your favourite paper. worse? The extra separation colour which appeared on o, the UK is ‘ready to fight’ Saddam the Christmas issue is now here to stay. The Hussein. Again. This time, the ‘world Author of the best letter submitted each week Scommunity’ (the US government feels (Editor’s decision if final and all that) will get justified in using this phrase when it agrees two pairs of free cinema tickets, unfortunately with Britain about something) is supposed to only valid on weekdays (Sun-Thurs). They can be outraged at Iraq’s unwillingness to allow be used for any film up to three months from United Nations weapons inspection teams the date of issue. We’re going to changing the access to its military installations. Then it fonts used on our headlines, and have a new emerges that all but two of the inspectors cur- computer programme, which means we can rently being refused access to sensitive sites in now update the internet-based version of the Iraq are either British or American. It sounds paper much faster. Provided you can gain too ridiculous to be true that the UN could send access to a networked computer, you will soon a team of rather brash and agressive be able not only to access Bare Facts, but print Americans, led by a loud and lairy ex-marine out your own copy on A4 paper, wherever you sporting a baseball cap, in order to carry out are in the world. We’re also looking to get the such sensitive work. The argument that only paper taped onto audio cassettes on the same British and US personnel have the ‘necessary day as it is printed, for those blind and partial- expertise’ to carry out the inspections is a ly sighted students who can’t read the pages ridiculous one. Scores of UN member states, you’re holding. Bare Facts arrives from the including other Security Council members printworks on Thursdays, and is distributed to (Russia and France) would be perfectly able to court receptions at Battersea, Guildford and do the job - and without the breathtaking arro- Stag Hill Courts, as well as to Hazel Farm, usu- gance displayed by current inspection team ally by lunchtime. The cover date has now leader Scott Ritter as he growled “we’ll be changed to reflect this. Lastly, the paper is now back” to waiting TV crews last week. After registered with the Press Complaints all, the decision on who is to continue with the Commission, and will adhere to the revised work, and when, should rest with governments. PCC Code of Practice. While the changes made to the code in November largely relate to The importance of these inspections (and the privacy - and Bare Facts regrettably can’t need to see UN resolutions enforced properly) afford to go chasing royals about exotic foreign is not being called into question. But avoiding bars - other parts of the code, relating to accu- the need for a military stand-off in the Gulf by racy, harassment, confidential sources and the sending inspectors who are not Saddam’s most right to reply are far more relevant. It is impor- hated enemies in the whole world bar none, is tant that all kinds of paper, including student surely too easy an opportunity to miss. papers, support their own industry code of Of course, increasing tension in the area can practice - if only to fend off the nanny govern- only be good news for a British Foreign ment and its naive, ill-conceived and hamfisted Secretary desperate to divert attention from his ideas for a privacy law.

The poetry corner Press Complaints Commission

Lines on Wrinkles

When you are young You try to find yourself While yourself is finding you You do what you are told And also just do You are only young once So that one day you can grow old But we are not born warm For us to grow cold

-C. Byrne Join the Poetry Society - melodious - Wednesdays, Wates House, 3pm ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:17 Page 5 (1,1)

n Thursday 22nd January 1998 Features 5 The wild postgrads are Consultancy review: its partying again... decision time....

The Postgad Association Naturally music alone was not enough to fuel On Monday, the Students’ Union results of modules 1 and 2. This is under- the ‘light fantango’, however the party was let ‘Executive Committee’ voted to standable as the results didn’t arrive until last great time was had by all at the PGA loose by the wide range of cocktails on offer. press ahead with the rest of CEL’s Thursday and a decision was needed before Cocktail Evening in Wates House on How the party-goers selected their cocktails is review. The Student Council to be the Student Council meeting next Thursday. a story in itself. Initially the wide range of Athe 11th of December. Greater than held next week could still override Certain members of the exec found this cocktails were viewed with some unnacceptable - myself being one - and 100 party-goers turned out at the first of many this decision, though. Now is the successful events to be organised by the new caution...especially Pernod Jelly Bean a’la abstained from a vote to proceed with mod- time to read carefully before the PGA committee. green lips (Ed.), whilst the beguiling inno- ules 3 and 4 if approved by the Student cence of the Brandy Daisy concealed the alco- debate, argues Sarah Gyles... Council. 70-80-90’s music....ABBA lovers beware!! holic potency inside. After initial inhibitions The evening commenced with restrained, were lost, as the alcohol took hold some With the results of modules 1 and 2 of the In principal we are very much in favour of bowties, dinner suits and cocktail dresses. The became more international and decided to CEL consultancy review just in, it is time to this review but considering the amount of music tempo of the night at a slow, subdued drink around the world: make a decision whether or not to proceed money that is involved we don’t feel that pace, a bit like the members but as the night with modules 3 and 4. As Mark reported these decisions should be made without prop- progressed the tempo increased audience par- From Singapore Gin Sling to sunny Hawaii (above), modules 1 and 2 were passed with er consideration. ticipation reaching a frenzy. Disco jives even- with a Waikiki Beachcomber to some criticism by members of the Union tually resorting to Whigfield moves and mad Mexican Black Sombrero or for those Executive committee. The main reason for Next Thursday a presentation will be made at grooves. with rich taste try a Champagne Special. this was a lack of time to read the proposal the Student Council concerning this review Some decided to go for broke, stick in one and make an informed decision. Even and then a vote will be taken as to whether or country and go large!! though there was a short amount of time not to proceed with the next stage. I would between the vote at the union exec and the urge any students with an interest in their The new PGA committee has several exciting Student Council for it to be studied more union to find out a little bit more about this future events organised. Forthcoming events closely it was still a bit of a rush. At this review. After all we are talking about thou- include: cocktails evening in February, a time we were informed that once modules 1 sands of pounds of union money being spent. Barn Dance in March, a River Boat Trip in and 2 were completed we could sit back and June and a BBQ in July. Find out what is look at the work that had been carried out There are copies of the results of modules 1 going on and how to party with the PGA, visit and make the decision about proceeding with and 2 with each of the sabbaticals and many our web site at: modules 3 and 4. union staff so feel free to ask to have a browse. It has some very interesting facts and http://www.ee.surrey.ac.uk/Societies/pga At the Union Exec meeting on Monday of figures about your Union and is very encour- or contact us at [email protected] week one we were asked to make this very aging as to the future of the Union and the decision without the majority having seen the Postgrads in action. Shortly after this photograph was changes that need to be made. taken, all three were (presumably) arrested and taken away for their own safety. ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:17 Page 6 (1,1)

6 Music Thursday 22nd January 1998

UNBELIEVABLE TRUTH - Higher Than Reason (Virgin) ALBUM OF THE WEEK SINGLES Andy Yorke, like his brother, makes serious ALBUMS PROPELLER- music of admittedly high quality. Certainly HEADS - A - Foghorn (Tycoon) not “pop” but melancholically enjoyable MARK EITZEL - Caught In A Trap And Decksand-drumsan- In my opinion one of A’s best songs, none-the-less. 7/10 R.W. I Can’t Back Out ‘Cause I Love You Too drockandroll (Wall ‘Foghorn’ is a rather fast and angry number, Much, Baby (Matador) of Sound) with harmonies to die for. If you’ve never DUBSTAR - ‘I Will Be Your Girlfriend’ (Food) If you are feeling somewhat depressed then Eagerly anticipated heard A before it’s about time you were This upbeat single, with lacerating, mali- this probably isn’t the album for you. cious lyrics, tells of a bird getting even at release, if only introduced, and you couldn’t do better than Nothing here is upbeat. Mark Eitzel delivers because they’re cur- this. 9/10 E.C. her bloke “I will be namesake, I will be his finest record since the American Music your headache, I will be your wits end, I Club’s ‘California’. ‘Caught...’ is a collec- rently doing well EARL BRUTUS - Come Taste My Mind will be your girlfriend” Poison pop anyone? tion of melancholic tunes with less stark with their collabora- (Fruition) If you catch your girlfriend singing along, lyrics than Eitzel has used in the past tion with Shirley This single really is a not quite the best bits get out quick. 7/10 N.W. backed by haunting melodies. Impressive to Bassey on History of Earl Brutus. The lead track is a great say the least. 8/10 R.W. Repeating. This is KINANE - Business (Coalition) rocking tune but not quite full Brutus and no destined to become catchy hook like past singles. ‘Nice Man In A nice R+B effort with some top remixes by SIZZLA - Praise Ye Jah (Jet Star) one of the staple fod- A Bubble’ shows their idea of a mellow K-class, Paul Gotel among others. Not bad, This young talented Jamaican has produced track which it as good as the lead. 9/10 I.P. not bad at all. 7/10 F.F. a truly amazing record boasting eleven ders of those familiar boom compositions. The powerful, uplifting with Wall of Sound CONVERT - Nightbird (A+M) MIDGET - All Fall Down (Radar) singer offers his audience a fiery brand of and is seen already as Interesting. A very good re-vamp of an old More infectious happy punk-pop from these truth and rights that has already made him an important state- choon that was being caned about 5 years youngsters. You can picture the crowds one of the most talked about artists in ment about the stan- ago. Vincent De Moor’s mix makes the sin- moshing to this. 7/10 R.W. Jamaica since Marley. Sizzla’s cultural gle every bit worth buying. I was unim- dards of so-called essence demonstrates feelings and passions Big Beat, the latest pressed, however, with the 187 Lockdown VITRO - Set It Down (Independiente) of extraordinary depth and his voice is an mix, even though they have produced some Third single from the new contenders for and coolest dance instrument in its own right: improvises all fad, outdoing speed amazing mixes over the past year. Go get it teachers pet. A relatively faceless track, the time whilst playing with his outstanding guys. 8/10 M.B. much improved by remixes from Dave informative lyrics, best songs on this album garage in the credi- Angel, Env’ Sci’, Andy Cairns and Skint’s are: ‘Homeless’ a song for the broken heart- bilty stakes, if not INSANE CLOWN POSSE - Halls Of IRM, marking out how impressed the scene Illusions (Island) ed, and ‘Blackness’, in which he addresses sales wise. For those is by Vitro and making sure it’s become a his race. 8/10 G.C. uninitiated it’s a good If these guys were in a circus it would n’t be trendy clubbers delight. And they’re from one to bring your five year old cousin to. PROPELLERHEADS WITH SHIRLEY BASSEY introduction to Wall Southend, hurrah. 6/10 H.B. V/A - The Distinctive Sound Of House Clowns they may be, but of the sadistic axe- of Sound, et al, with Vol.2 (Distinctive) wielding variety. ‘Southwest Voodoo’ even the dance element being superseded by all the crunching, squelching, dub, break- WIRELESS - In Love With The Familiar Robin Ford isn’t a name that I recognise, has an ingredients list for voodoo, very useful (Chrysalis) but the selection on this double-CD pack is beats and basslines to create tunes of a thousand knobs, so mashed that it defies for those practicing “dark magic”. 8/10 E.C. A pop tune from Wireless with a few strings instantly recognisable as a collection of up- simple description and epitomises all that’s good about electronica/big beat/any COMFORT - Mr Rosehip (Insoussiance) and a very professional feel that seems very front house stormers. Robin mixes smooth- label you care to give it. Hip, necessary and a double hurrah. 9/10 H.B A nice mellow job with a chorus that you familiar and ultimately lacks refreshment. ly, but at times is erratic and unsure of the would die for (or maybe not) 8/10 F.F. 6/10 D.J. sounds he wishes to put out. There are a V/A - Platinum: An Introspective Of previous record label. ‘Underground’ is a number of classics, such as ‘Sueno Latino’ House (Soundimension) classic and ‘Song For The Dumped’ a witty SINGLE OF THE WEEK by the group of the same name and ‘High’ This is an album that I put in my top ten of lyrical highlight, but this collection of piano by Hyper Go-Go from 1989 and 1992 last year, and deservedly so. Three DJs, led power-pop is really for existing fans of PEARL JAM respectively, but these are mixed in with the three CDs covering various styles. The first the band. Newcomers are better of checking - Given To Fly sound of today professionally, and with little is mixed by Seb Fontaine, and he produces out last year’s ‘Whatever And Ever Amen’. (Epic) fault. There are some unexpected entries some slick mixing of some very trancey 6/10 R.W. into the compilation taking it far from the tunes, with Brainbug’s ‘Nightmare’ continu- Eddie Vedder V/A - Deceptive Fifty (Deceptive) commercial scene, which is refreshing, as ously appearing but not listed. John Kelly A collection representing the Deceptive ros- and his cohorts many compilations seem to feature very steps up for the second CD. An ter to celebrate their fiftieth release, and it is return with a similar tracklistings. This album takes on a Introspective “resident” he provides us with pretty hit and miss. Elastica’s ‘Stutter’ still new aspect of the house scene, and is well some excellent Speed Garage moving into truly magnifi- sounds thrilling, a shame they are taking so worth taking a look at. I’m not sure how some uplifting house. The mixing is mar- cent Zeppelin- long to get back. Jonathan Fire Eater and many listening hours you’ll get, but if you velous and when you’ve got Double 99’s The Prisoners represent the best of the cur- styled song like it the first time, you’ll be sure to come ‘Ripgroove’ on the same CD as Moonman’s rent Deceptive crop, with Idlewild already which ebbs back again. 7/10 M.B. ‘Don’t Be Afraid’ you know it’s going to be and flows with a stormer. On the third CD is Graeme Park. having left for the Food label, a shame as their Pixies-style rifferama is quite excel- subtle beauty. V/A - Don’t Forget To Breathe (Crank) Unfortunately, apart from Jaydee’s ‘Plastic The quality is quite decent on this compila- Dreams’ and Rosie Gaines’ ‘Closer Than lent. The rest however leaves a lot to be The first great tion of 17 different indie-rock bands, and Close’ this CD falters. The mixing isn’t up desired. 6/10 R.W. record of ‘98. the prescribed variety keeps one’s attention to scratch and there are a few mistakes that V/A - Boogie Nights OST (Capitol) from wandering too much. The basic vocab- Graeme has to rectify but sound obvious on 9/10 R.W. Music from allegedly the hottest film of the ulary here is guitar based, but no two songs the CD. The tunes are slow and garagey, but year comes in the form of 70s disco classics sound very much alike. San Diego’s Drive there are just too many vocals for my liking from the likes of Marvin Gaye, The Beach Like Jehu do a live version of ‘Bullet Train and it just ground away at my patience. Boys and ELO. This soundtrack claims to To Vegas’ that trashes and burns like an Forget Graeme Park and get it for Seb and BAG - Blue Suburban Skies (Universal) CUCKOO - Non Sequitur (Geffen) “set the tone and evoke the hedonistic inferno. Vitreous Humor engage in John! 7/10 M.B. A slab of catchy tuneful rock that will do Another indie four- piece, this time from ambiance of the pre-Aids era’. Well it Pavement like riffery with extremely posi- well.. sounds faintly like Teenage Fanclub’s Ireland and with more backing than Skoot, might, but this ultimately is just more inter- tive results, while Denver’s Christie’s Front BEN FOLDS FIVE - Naked Baby Photos earliest efforts.. quite a promising debut. which is why this may do better, although esting than usual seventies soundtrack to a Drive provide some off-killer instrumental (Caroline) 8/10 G.C. it’s just as missable. Short, bouncy, radio- cool film. The highlight, of course, comes based tension that quietly builds to a Basically a cash-in compilation of early sin- friendly but lacking that stand out quality to from the Beach Boys with the classic ‘God crescendo.. on the whole this is a worth- gles, unreleased tracks (some of which DAWN OF THE REPLICANTS - guarantee success. 5/10 H.B. Only Knows’, whilst Walter Egan adds while guide to a number of artists from who would have been better of staying that way) Candlefire (EastWest) some metal to the proceedings with ‘Magnet you are sure to be hearing more. 7/10 G.C. and live recordings from Ben Folds Five’s Not the ‘dawn’ of an exciting new era in CE CE PENISTON - Somebody Else’s and Steel’. 6/10 D.J. guitar music, but the continuation of excel- Guy (A&M) lent guitar music in the spirit of REM. Very Proving she’s not a one hit wonder after her FOIL - JUNE OF 44 - Four Great Points Worthwhile. 8/10 D.J. song from years ago ‘Finally’, everyone’s Spread It All (Quarterstick) fave singer returns with a R&B track by Around June Of 44 seem to take many different SJ - I Feel Divine (React) numbers, unusually for this genre its a styles of music and mix them together in to A housey little number that thumps its way (Thirteenth cover. It would be all right if it was left a bit Hour) a sort of musical marble cake. One second through three mixes. Tall Paul delivers a more raw, more real; but unfortunately it’s your listening to a very calming indie num- stomping Euro-house track, that sends shiv- spoilt by the sickening film of overproduc- A debut ber with the lead vocal almost whispering, ers down the spine, whereas Baby Doc pro- tion. 5/10 N.W. album that and then the guitar moves to rock and vides more of a cheesy commercial side to has turned up you’re being shouted at. The group make a the track, and Dem2 apply speed garage SKOOT - Seems To Me (S&M Records) with not even lot of use of these sudden changes along pressure. A welcome addition to my record A pleasant and quite catchy jaunt, in a typi- a whimper with other more unusual items such as a bag! 7/10 M.B. cal indie four-piece kind of way. Releasing from the press typewriter. The music also varies from punk such a careful track is disappointing because to new age at times, but the underlying ST. ETIENNE - Sylvie (Creation) department. A there’s a lot of potential hiding behind this shame really tones are mostly indie. On the whole the Thankfully no progression from all their one, as is shown on the flipsides. This how- as they aren’t group are quite reasonable, but the album other stuff. Typical xylophone effects, syn- ever, passes you by. 5/10 H.B. doesn’t seem to be screaming “buy me”. thetic disco and whimsical vocals. A glam really going 5/10 E.C. affair offering a warning to a younger, cute SUNHOUSE - Smalltime Sessions to be that suc- sister to stop tempting her bloke, a reaffirm- (Indipendiente) cessful with- THE FLYING LUTTENBACHERS - ing return after a long break that nothing’s A rootsy American rock sounding band, i.e. out hype Gods Of Chaos (Skin Graft) changed, and the flipsides are fab too. 7/10 Live and Counting Crows, with four slow beyond hype. Escaping the normal constraints of what H.B. but occasionally medium paced rays of sun- The album most people would class as music, (such as shine (not). Minimalist but not nearly as has some a song or a tune), The Flying Luttenbachers SMOKIN BEATS feat LYN EDEN - cool as lo-fi. 5/10 D.J. opt for what can only be described as Dreams (AM:PM) great bits in it “noise”. Feedback sounded better than this. What can I say? If you don’t know it, you FAMILY OF FREE LOVE - Days Like such the live Actually quite a bit of it is feedback, which haven’t been listening to the right radio sta- These (Virgin) favorite explains a lot. The “music” ranges from tion. Plenty of mixes and a good bass-line Possibly the new Rootjoose, which we did- ‘Control “deathjazz”, to “hard metal”, to an all out make this a welcome addition to anyone’s n’t need in the first place. They’d like to Freak’ and the “punk frenzy”. It certainly is fast and furi- collection, but only if they happen to be think they were Jellyfish, they don’t even hit(?) ‘Are ous. One track reminded me of a crude pot garage fans, for this is truly a garage track come close. 3/10 R.W. You Enemy’. and pan drum kit that every kid must have through and through. Look out for the ‘Back made at one point in their lives, (you know, To Reality Remix’ with its grinding B-Line The album doesn’t quite live up to the band’s live performance which is storm- ing. Unlike many bands, they don’t rely on the current Oasis/ Ocean Colour big pots, a wooden spoon, and randomly hit- and interesting samples. 7/10 M.B. ting everything in sight), except that the kid Scene/ Blur copying that seems to be rife in the industry these days in order to would be more musical. This is apparently This weeks music bought to you by - get a crowd going. Back to the album, if you like a good hard rock experience, Matthew Beal, Daniel Jones, Ian Purvey, Emma Clarke, Honey Butcher, the group’s 5th album, which leaves me you can do no worse than get foil. Don’t forget to catch them live when they go with the horrible realisation that there are Gabriel-Oliver Chamero, Frank Fraulo, Nick Walsh, on tour later this month. 8/10 F.F. actually people out there that buy this stuff. Andrew Thomas, Gemma Decent, Rob Winder 1/10 E.C. ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:17 Page 7 (1,1)

n Thursday 22nd January 1998 Entertainments Guide 7 GIG GUIDE It is always advisable to confirm with the venue before travelling. Cineline - (01483) 578017

20:00 Only Fools and Horses Disco Pistol, Kickstart, Taxi Driver, Anomic - Upstairs At The Garage (0171 607 1818) From Friday 23rd Jan to 21:00 Blackadder Hybirds - London Astoria (0171 434 9592) Thursday 29th Jan 1998 21:35 Friday Night Armistice Inter - Wimbledon John Innes Youth Centre Fri & Sat (23rd / 24th) 22:05 Game On Lounge Act - London Camden Barfly (0171 482 4808) Titanic 18:00/23:35 TFI Friday Spice Power - Reading Alleycat (0118 956 1116) 12.10 12:55 16.15 16:55 20.20

23rd Spillage - Farnham Maltings (01252 726234) 22:00 Frasier 21:00 Friday 22:30 Eurotrash Surfing Brides - London Borderline (0171 734 2095) Home Alone 3 12.45 21:00 Game On (RPT) Devil’s Advocate 22:00 Looking after Jo Jo 15:15 18:30 21:50 Mutton Birds, Sonic Fish, Lizard Kings - Reading Alleycat (0118 956 1116) Boogie Nights 20:30 FILM: The Beast 13.45 17:45 21:20 George of the Jungle

24th 13.15 Tomorrow Never Dies

Saturday 15.45 18.40 21.30 IN Campag Velocet - Spiceworld - The Movie 19:10 FILM: Stargate YOUR 12.15 14.25 16.35 22:10 The Unique Dave Allen Guildford, Surrey University UNION The Jackal Dust Junkys, Earl Brutus, Bullyrag - 19.20 22.10 21:00 Londons Burning Portsmouth Wedgewood Rooms (01705 The Full Monty 863911) 19.35 Asian Dub Foundation, Stereophonics, 25th 22:50 Super Bowl XXXII Warm Jets, Theaudience - London Astoria Picture Perfect

Sunday (0171 434 9592) 12.10 14.35 17.05 21.40 The Borrowers 12.15 14.20 21:30 Neighbours at War Up ‘n’ Under 23:25 Film 98 with Barry Norman Blique, Jacobs Tale, Sunburst - 16.25 18.50 21.20 Reading Alleycat (0118 956 1116) The Wings of A Dove 20:30 Babewatch Paradise Lost, Novocaine - London 13.00 14.00 Shepherds Bush Empire (0171 287 1331) Starship Troopers 21:00 Heroes of Comedy

26th 19.00 22.00 23:30 The Brats - the NME Music Awards Monday Sun - Thurs (25th-29th)

20:00 University Challenge Titanic 23:15 Seinfeld 11.20 14.20 15.20 19.00 19.25 No 11.20 showing on Sunday 20:00 Coca-Cola Cup Semi- MTJ, Smacker, Oxygen - Reading Home Alone 3 Final: Liverpool v Middlesbrough Alleycat (0118 956 1116) 13.15

27th 21:00 Crash Devil’s Advocate 22:00 Watch the Skies: Critters 13.30 16.50 20.05 Tuesday No 13.30 showing on Sunday Boogie Nights 21:30 Harry Enfield and Chums 13.00 16.30 19.55 22:00 The X Files George of the Jungle Carrie, Tidy, Mink - London Kings Cross 12.30 Water Rats (0171 837 7269 Tomorrow Never Dies Headswim - Portsmouth Wedgewood 12.15 15.00 17.45 20.35 Rooms (01705 863911) No 12.15 showing on Sunday 22:30 Friends 28th Spiceworld - The Movie 12.30 14.45 The Jackal Wednesday 17.30 20.25 Bamboo Streamer, Spicy Goat - The Full Monty Reading Alleycat (0118 956 1116) 20:30 Jeremy Clarkson’s Headswim - London 100 Club (0171 636 18.35 Extreme Machines 0933) Picture Perfect Romeo Delight - London The Garage 13.15 16.05 20.45 20:00 The Bill (0171 607 1818) The Borrowers 22:40 FILM: Robocop 3 12.10 14.05 29th Starship Troopers 17.15 20.15 Thursday

20:00 Ronnie Barker - a Life in PICK Green Day - London Brixton Comedy OF THE Academy (0171 264 1525) 20:30 Porridge WEEK Chumbawamba - Portsmouth Pyramid Centre 21:35 Friday Night Armistice (01705 358608) 22:05 Game On Rubberfoot, Lupa, Soda Curve - Reading 18:00/23:35 TFI Friday Alleycat (0118 956 1116) 30th Shelter - London Camden Barfly (0171 482

Friday 22:00 Frasier 22:30 Eurotrash 4808) VOLCANO Green Day - London Brixton Academy (0171 264 1525) Midget, Glitterbox, Idlewild - London SUN 25th / MON 26th Garage (0171 607 1818) Inter, Dick Savage PI - Basingstoke See noticeboard in 31st Fairfield Arts Centre Union for details Saturday ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:17 Page 8 (1,1)

8 Cinema and Arts Thursday 22nd January 1998 n BETH ORTON MIDGET, GLITTERBOX, Celebrating her birthday at Shepherds Bush Empire. Nick Walsh his gig sold out well in advance, WINNER, REAL MILHOUSE and rightly so, was set up to cele- Farnham Maltings, 10 January 1998. Rob Winder, photos Matthew Pannell Tbrate Beth’s 27th. Birthday. This gave the night a light hearted atmosphere board player have certainly been good for them. Here rather than being one of the standard in Farnham they were simply stunning. They opened tense, sweaty gigs were forced to endure, with ‘Tonight To Hell’ and they ripped it up in fine all sorts were here, from the ones smok- fashion, grinning as the teenage girls pogoed frantical- ing their jazz fags and stroking their goa- ly in front of them. Glitterbox deliver with power and tees to the couples singing along to ‘the passion, a hearty mix of post-grunge rock music, epi- hits’. cally styled but raggedly thrilling. They slam through The support band for the night was ‘The ‘Houdini’ and end with ‘Yawning’ and a wall of feed- Unbelievable Truth’ who are most back... cool! Midget are obviously the main attraction, notable as having for a singer Andy Yorke, the brother of that bloke in the girls are pushed away as the boys come out to Radiohead, this point is really irrelevant, mosh. Midget play their melodic punk with a certain he looks nothing like him, sings nothing verve. Their old songs are greeted with much gusto by like him, and the band end up sounding the crowd, and deservedly so. The newer songs lack like duff, American college rock. Maybe the naive exuberance of the earlier ones, except the I am being a bit hard, or maybe not if new single ‘All Fall Down’. Maybe it is just the deliv- you compare them to Beth Orton and her ery as the band haven’t played in a while. Midget entourage, who as soon as they take to show promise, but on this night Glitterbox shone. the stage are all smiles and friendly ban- ter. Beth especially is looking wonderful, done out in a ultra chic, sparkling sequin dress. The band quickly start up ‘Touch Me With Your Love’ which is even better than the recorded version with its slightly harder edge. The backdrop of three huge screens which project images, tainly nothing wrong with that. Getting up on GLITTERBOX rather than being an annoying diversion, com- stage is always going to be easy when the plement the songs by in-a-way visualising the songs do all the work you, when ‘She Cries his was to have been a Splatch! show at the meanings, for instance on the sublime Your Name’ is introduced, a strange sensation Civic Hall, except the Civic Hall believe that ‘Galaxy Of Emptiness’ the swirling streams passes down your spine and you feel all faint. the general behavior of teenagers is the respon- of lights create an ambience which is simply The band return with ‘Someone’s Daughter’, T sibility of the promoter, rather than their bar staff who perfect A new song is played ‘Passing Time’ ‘Don’t need a reason’ and ‘Live As You on bare bones acoustic and it shows she has- Dream’, a transcendent end to a wonderful serve alcohol to the under-age. The event has been n’t lost her ability to write great songs, the evening. I am definitely a better person for relocated to Farnham and is welcomed with open song touches on Nick Drake but there is cer- being here. arms. Real Milhouse are obviously influenced by 90s style The Civic Hall have a couple of recently announced shows: West Coast American punk, their dual vocals and Levellers - 7.30pm March 13, £11 advance. some good songs mean they could be one to watch. Spiritualised - 7.30pm March 19, £9 advance . Winner however are one to avoid, no songs just noise, Bennet, Jaguar, Redwood and Inter are at the Princes Hall in Aldershot on February 6. Tickets no idea, no good. from West End Centre Aldershot. Over the past few months Glitterbox have certainly developed into one of the better live bands around, Some of the Sunday Night Bands this term are Campag Velocet (23 Jan), A (8 Feb), Dust and the Christmas break and the addition of a key- IDGET NEWS M Junkys and RootjooseThe. cinema reviews... Boogie Nights (18) - Mark Wahlberg, Burt Reynolds Up N Under (12)

to what he knows best. simply not convincing. Slattery, Tania Rocks however, makes an excellent return Boogie Nights is a great film. to comedy as the slimy rival, a role Wahlberg pulls off the wet behind hat a brilliant way to start he was born to play. Neil Morrisey the ears teenager soon to becum a Sunday, a free preview plays a wimp, just as he plays in porn superstar role with ease and Wof the new British film “Men Behaving Badly”. Reynolds is his majestic best as a “Up ‘n’ Under”. professional joy juice provider. The whole film roars along to heady The characters and their mix ensure To put it simply, this film is about an excessive swearing, the phrase “I’ll heights then plummets into despair inter-pub rugby competition. Gary when Diggler leaves Horner’s side. eat my shit” is funny the first time Olsen stars as Arthur, the once bril- This is helped by a soundtrack but not the fourth! A little full nudi- which fits like a glove and some liant rugby player who is down on ty, kind of a rear shot, but it’s pri- stunningly directed camera shots his luck. A chance meet with an old marily a lads film, so there you go. and set pieces. rival (Tony Slattery) leads to Arthur placing a bet that he will be able to Full a British film it is surprisingly For a film about pornography, there train a team to beat the top team in good, I would even put it above however, gifted in other depart- Bruce Chapman is surprisingly little nudity in the the league, the Cobblers. “Four Weddings and A Funeral”. It ments and makes a major impact film and the sex scenes themselves Predictably, the team chosen is bot- may not have the international when he first gets to use his tool of make you think that you are seeing hat a whopper of a film tom of the league, a band of 5 men the trade. Joining up with characters a lot more than you actually are. appeal that “The Full Monty” has, with which to start the who see 4 pints and a fag as an ade- such as Rollergirl (never removes The only thing that lets the film but it is hilarious, even with a pre- New Year. Boogie Nights quate warm up for a game. In des- W her rollerboots whilst on the job) down is a half hour stretch towards dictable end. My only comment is provides a snapshot of late 70’s and peration, Arthur recruits the owner and Amber Waves, he soon the end where Diggler is clutching why all of the old, although British, early 80’s disco fever and the heady, becomes an major player in the at straws to re-invent himself. of a local gym, played by Samantha songs? Don’t we have any new pre-coital rise and post coital droop Golden Age of the late 70’s porn However, this is an integral part of Janus, to get the team fit. All of this of the American porn industry. bands with new music around? The set-up. the film and makes it what it is. This he does with a nagging wife, and a Mixed with a huge nostril full of reason for this could be that the film half hour may make the film maybe pestering father-in-law (Brian is aimed at the slightly older gener- cocaine, this really is the first big After his meteoric rise to fame, a touch too long, but not overtly so Glover, in his last role). With eight ation who enjoy The Beautiful film of the year. Diggler’s ego inflates to almost the and it certainly does not ruin what is weeks to the big match can he pos- South and bands like that, but it sim- same size of his monster-sized the best climax of the year so far. Mark Wahlberg plays Dirk Diggler - sibly make the team play, let alone ply comes across as saving money. organ and he becomes resentful 8/10 win? porn star supreme, rescued from his towards the people who made him dish washing job in a groovy night the star he had become. Leaving club in down town LA by movie Horner’s cradle, Diggler dabbles in Olsen is excellent as the put upon maker Jack Horner (Burt Reynolds). singing and dealing before returning Arthur, but after seeing him for so Diggler, not being a natural actor is, many years his Northern accent is ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:17 Page 9 (1,1)

n Thursday 22nd January 1998 Notices & Personals 9 Personals

n Chiquitillo, la torre de la Vela te n Merry Xmas and happy new Happy! professional. - Serious... nI’m into dirty hands too! espera year to my Tiger.xxxxxx n Where owe where did the police nSimon, Simon... with the green nLaura says: ‘You were very help- n SYDENHAM ROAD LADS,see n KERRY E. I LUV YOU!! KS come from during the Canoe 406,... Nathan came to buff my ful...I’m grateful!’ ya in gran canaria, we’ll miss ya, James, bad luck mate, love all at Club’s explosive wander??? - W table. nLouise, the Liver Kelly, ... stop love burpham birds xx sydenham road. QUE CONYAZO ERES GOBIO nI like my table buffed. drinking now! n Pompey James You’re goin n Did you know the average num- Cumplimos un anyo. Felicidades nSimon, Simon... I felt sorry for nLouise adds toenails clippings her down mate from London boyz ber of Britains has sex 36 times a carinyo. 24 ENERO you. But doing the table juts wasn’t wild rice. SERPENTINE??!!! week.....blimey Em. n She’s just giggleing hysterical- for you. nNick B... I’m glad to see/smell n Eric and Kara. Happy New n Does Pannell check these? ly... nOutrageous!!! I can’t believe you you’ve firmed up a bit!!! Year!!!! from 166 GPA n How many cars? n Haggis’s Hurley hat-trick said that! nColin... stop groning in the morn- n mathis, halt die stellung, wir n Who are “The Lights” n I shouldn’t be sitting here filling nNathan, all I can do is thank you! ing!! Just stop! haben dich alle lieb, bis september, Tiger. I LOVE YOU . in space just because no-one has nI can’t ride a bike... however!!! nAndrew Goodacre.. We all love alles liebe, julia n MGxxxxxxxxx written in to the paper and submit- nTo Murren....Love Williams you for your story! n DOWN WITH BOLANGLEZ!!! n Cyprus says hello!!! ted anything of interest that would nDear Max... By graves indeed. nJeff... you’re at the pub. How Na dann viel Alkohol und Spass in n This week the sabbat have most- make ideal copy for one of the nI’ve broken my New Year’s could you do this to me?! Moskau und Gran Canaria...bis ly benn eating.. Haziz pages, whether it be in the middle Resolution! but into dirty hands!! September.. n Bo’s during revision week, or back or front or .... nGinger’s arrived .... we’ll stop n To all Retailers - enjoy the Cindies during exam week. We n I’ve got the raging horn spreding rumours!! H’n’C Ball - let’s run a retail one don’t DO that ! cogratulations to the cits who have nThere’s a billion bacteria on a next year? n Nanny Ogg, what was your score finished their exams!! dish cloth...’L’ has 8 billion!! n There is a seruious lack of over Xmas?? n WALID K. needs a good shag!! Personals this week. n Duracell Bunny - How were the OI, SANTA, NO, I ASKED FOR n 5H. Happy New Year to the Holidays - do much bunnying - Get POSH SPICE, NOT AN ENCY- Dancing Queen. love 3EE and 5F on with your tricks - Warren! CLOPEDIA!! bloody northerner, switched my n “Tonight at Jazz club we’re n I like ‘IT’ in extraordinary mobile off, going abroad. see ya, proud to introduce Sally weak places!!!!! bloody foreigner bladder. nShall we have cheese toasties at n Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah n MMMmmmmmoist.” midnight? da denke ich einmal an die n Paul & Fiona please remember nChains will definitely make me Kassette... the bed squeeks scream!!!!!!!! n Kaveh, Orian, Steph..... n Martyn Green you sod, you still nTelevision makes me “role LOOOONDON (To pronounce owe me 12 quid for the trailor around!!!!” with Swedish accent!) straps - fancy writing me a check?? nI make my own ‘perfume’!!! n Saturday night, Sydenham road, n Hi Rosie, Missed you lots, Love Ther’s only the one!! be there or be a boring arsehole!! Jon n’Stubble’ is a big turn off! Love n Wayhay to the six Weyside n Hola serpentine, soy Catwoman Michael. Birds. Penguin Lady, don’t worry be nKitchen tables buffed for free by Notices

OFU - AGM will be held at 6pm on Tuesday to start in January. Travelling expenses can be Week3 in LTH paid or I can give you a lift. Please contact Katherine on bs61kh or 234370. The annual talent contest: weeks 7, 8 & 9. (3rd, 10th & 17th March). Final is on March Womens’ Rugby AGM, Monday week 3 22nd (Sunday). Music, comedy, mime, dance, (2nd February), 5:30pm, Grant Mitchell juggling, poetry - anything you’re good at. Room. Contact Zoe ext 9583 (daytime only) Even if you can fart particularly well. Start practising now! Look out for entry forms in Positions of the fortnight: Come and try out the Unplugged pigeon hole. 1st prize is a gen- exciting positions with the Netball Club on erous cash donation as well as the chance to Monday nights (6-8pm). As from 19th Jan we support our special guests, Rootjoose, for the will have our resident coach (will improve final evening. those ball skills no end). If you’re a GK or a GS (Great Kisser or a Great Snog) , help us to Next Student Council meeting is Thursday prove that Girls just wanna have fun. week 2 (29th Jan). To include: Skills Development programme, debates on the Kitty Leveret, please contact Rob at Bare Consultancy Review (see news) and Staff Facts, re. Music Reviews Protocol, the chance to grill the Union Nightline needs you! If you’ve been Officers,to add your voice, and to make a dif- involved in the past, PLEASE let us know ference! All students welcome - LTD, 6pm. your new contact details. Information evening Bring your mates. for anyone interested in joining. Thurs 29th Jan, TB21, 7:30pm. The Jiu Jitsu Club is holding special ‘beginners sessions’ on Wed 28th January 8-10pm Refesh you Knowledge of the University and Sun 1st February, 5:30-8pm. Anyone wel- Be a better Course Rep, be a better Senior come. Resident, learn how to use the system. Lecture Theatre B 6pm to 8pm 26th January The Students Union is looking for a couple of 1998 students to take over and maintain its internet Contact Sam Birmingham on Ext. 9228 for site. It is not that time consuming with and details. hour or so a week once it is up to date. If you are interested in getting involved send an Get your lovely ripe bananas here. email to [email protected] or pop into the Look at that, lovely. There will be a Fruit and Communications Office. Veg stall in the Union from about 11am-3pm on Thursday 29th. So come along and buy Do you like working with young people? I some nice potatoes. am looking for volunteers to help me with a new Red Cross youth group in Godalming Golf Club AGM - 1pm Thurday 22nd, Upper (aged 10+) on Monday evenings from 6-7pm, Union concourse. ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:17 Page 10 (1,1)

10 Features Thursday 22nd January 1998 n In your first year? Fed up with the UK? Then read on - the International Office can help you...

Margaret Westwood explains the benefits of studying abroad (below) and hen we first arrived, the culture Las Vegas - the home of hospitality and most (right) two UK students give their account of life in the USA.... shock was much more intense than famously renound for the gambling. Wwe expected. People think that The gaming industry here supports the whole because they speak the same language here that state, there are no state taxes paid by residents It’s great to be back! Or is it? Does the thought el) but you will continue to receive your student it can’t be that much different - but it is, and it’s and no income tax - that has to be a bonus!. of waking up to blue skies, sunshine, shorts and loan throughout the year. very different. The degree of difference varies One of our courses is Casino Operations man- T-shirts in February have a certain appeal? Or depending where you are in the States, but here agement, originally chosen because it sounded how about crunching real snow underfoot, in And is it worthwhile? in Las Vegas there is such a wide variety of ‘interesting’, but it turned out to be absolutely crisp, clean air and picture book mountain Most Departments give positive support and people from different countries, cultures and fascinating. We knew nothing about casinos scenery? Well it could be like that for you in encouragement to students interested in an communities, that it is hard to establish the before we came here, but after being taught by January 1999 - if you are one of the students Exchange year - and if you flick through the norms of the actual area. This does have a the world’s only casino management professor, selected for the University of Surrey/US current Prospectus you’ll find many great advantage, in that we have made a lot of ( acknowledged to be the best in the world’) we Exchange programme. Departments feature the students who have friends from all over America. The diversity of now know considerably more. been amongst the lucky ones selected to go. people is unbelievable - you don’t realise how There are currently 11 students at partner insti- And you are likely to find that employers give stereotyped the British are about everything We feel that if a career in hospitality manage- tutions in the USA. Surrey is one of a handful ‘plus points’ to students who have broadened from how they behave, to the clothes they wear ment is what you are aiming for, you would of universities that make this possible for stu- their horizons by studying and travelling and the music they listen to. Here anything learn so much more coming here even for a dents in any Faculty or Discipline (not just stu- abroad.So aside from having an exciting oppor- goes, and the great thing is that most people get brief period of time The UNLV experience dents of American Studies, which is the more tunity to experience a totally new life and some on well too! opens your eyes to so much. The only other usual limitation) and the only provisos are that exotic travel - Thanksgiving in New thing we can say, is that if you want to do the there is an acceptable academic course match Orleans...Christmas hols in Arizona, Colorado, Whilst trying to adapt to our new surroundings, exchangeand can afford to do it, then what are and that the student meets the eligibility crite- California...then the Spring in Florida...or even we were also having to get used to a totally dif- you waiting for? Our experiences out here ria. Acapulco...(they all send postcards) - you will ferent educational environment. Everything have been amazing and it’s something you certainly be enhancing your career prospects. from the structure of the university to the class- probably won’t be able to do at any other time How does it work? es and professors was new. However, once we in your life. So make the most of the opportu- Taking part in the Exchange does not add to the If you are a first year UK student and want had established ourselves and settled into our nity - and go for it! length of your degree course; you remain regis- to find out more, come to the meeting adver- new lifestyle, we realised the many advantages tered as a Surrey student (which means your tised below Or call into the International of being here and started to make the most of -CatherineCraggs and Danielle Martin LEA pays your tuition fees) but you enrol in the Office, Philip Marchant Building (opposite our time. It didn’t take us long to realise that courses at the American institute that broadly Careers Office) the most important thing to us, from the point (spent the Fall Semester 1997 at the University correspond to the courses or module that you of view of being Hotel Management majors, of Nevada Las Vegas) would have been taking in your 2nd year at Margaret Westwood was the fact that we were now actually living in Surrey. The American students do the same - there’s two-way traffic. You need to have suffi- P.S If you came to the Exchanges meeting last cient funds to cover your living costs (and trav- semester, don’t come again - this is a repeat! Crossword No. 61

Across Down 1. Pinches (4) 1. Provided with information (8) 3. Pretentious (8) 2. Sharpness of taste (8) 8. Armoured Vehicle (4) 4. Display ostentatiously (6) 9. Whimsical (8) 5. Increasing in stages (10) 11. Often (10) 6. Small tassel (4) 14. Repeat performance (6) 7. Child’s toy (4) 15. Badly ventilated (6) 10. Encircled (10) 17. Period of compulsory isolation (10) 12. Issued by proper authority (8) 20. Bridge carrying canal (8) 13. Given a role appropriate to actor’s 21. Italian Money unit (4) nature (4-4) 22. Tunes (8) 16. Children’s nursery (6) 23. Slattern (4) 18. Healing ointment (4) 19. Material used for heat or power (4)

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n Thursday 22nd January 1998 features 11 Careers: Dr Russ replies Dear Russ doubts about any of these require- Banishing ments a PhD might not be right for I am thinking about doing a PhD. you. How should I go about it and how do I know I would be suited to it Moving on to the other part of your anyway? question, a good place to start looking is in the Postgrad or in Prospects backache Dear Annette Postgraduate Directory. Both will give you some idea of the kind of It is probably better if I answer the research going on in different parts of second part of your question first. I the country. If you would like more have lost count of the number of PhD detailed information you could try students I have seen over the years Current Research in Britain, a copy of Andy Goring, A.A.F. (Dip) who have wanted to give up. Time which can be seen in the Main Sports Injury Clinic BAD POSTURE after time it has become quite clear Library. This contains brief descrip- If you have had back trouble, or are in pain In the context of back pain, bad posture that they couldn’t say quite why they tions of the work which various acad- right now, you have probably asked the means any posture that puts your spine did it in the first place nor whether emic staff in British universities are question “Why me?” You may be able to under unnecessary strain. When we talk they would be suited to it. PhD’s are doing. Of course, if you would like recall some awkward twisting or straining about poor posture we generally mean slack so different from undergraduate stud- to stay at Surrey, all you need to do is action which sparked off the pain, but per- posture, in other words, slouching in a chair, walking with hands in pockets etc. There is ies. Apart from one or two special to mention your interest to the mem- haps the same movement has not injured your back in the past, and other people may no evidence to suggest that such habits doctorates most PhD’s involve no lec- ber of staff with whom you would be unharmed by similar activities. The increase the risk of back problems. tures no revision and just one single like to work and they will tell you chances are that your back was already in a However, other types of posture are a major 2/3 hour exam at the end. You may what might be available. condition where a relatively minor incident cause of backache. Leaning over a desk or find yourself working alone for long was sufficient to trigger the pains. Though it working with your arms raised for long periods, lifting heavy weights while bending periods. You may meet what appear The next step would be to send your is difficult to isolate any particular feature which predisposes people to back trouble, from your waist instead of at your knees, sit- to be insurmountable problems or CV with a covering letter explaining factors such as age, occupation and fitness ting in a chair of the wrong height or with- simply fail to get the results that you what you would like to do and why. all play a part. Diagnosing what has gone out adequate back support can all result in so desperately need which will form You could make as many applications wrong and which particular part of the back back problems. the bulk of your eventual thesis. If as you like has been injured can be extremely difficult, you think about the kind of qualities even for a specialist. which you would need to cope with Russ Clark A great deal of chronic or recurring back FITNESS these situations, it may become Careers Service pain is due to poor posture, and in a way this apparent to you that determination, is heartening because everyone can do patience, good time management and STOP PRESS!!! We have just something about their posture without If you are fit your muscles will be strong and the ability to solve problems are all of received the latest edition of Research recourse to drugs, surgery or other drastic flexible and you are likely to recover more measures. critical importance. It also goes with- Topics in the Life quickly from injury than an unfit person. out saying that you should have an and Chemical Sciences. This con- Your bones will be stronger too, and if you remain fit as you grow older, your bones enquiring mind and a great love for tains information about PhD CHANGING YOUR will retain their strength for longer than the subject you are studying. How do opportunities in over 120 those of an unfit person. you fit this bill? If you have serious departments throughout the UK. POSTURE Abdominal muscles are the ones that you use when you perform sit-ups. If they are Assuming that your back trouble is at least strong they will help to support the spine by in part caused by your posture, what can you increasing pressure in the abdomen, which do to alter the latter? You may be able to reduces stress on the lower spine. If your change your posture for a minute or two if abdominal muscles are weak, your back has you concentrate, but this temporary change to take more weight. This will make you is unlikely to banish backache. Posture that prone to lower back pain. has developed over many years tends to remain fixed, but with perseverance you can The strength of back muscles, however, alter these fixed muscular patterns. does not seem to affect the chances of having back trouble unless you are lifting particularly heavy weights. Most of us have If you are going to try to change your pos- back muscles which are quite adequate to tural habits, you need to think about muscles cope with normal every day activities. you use - for the most part subconsciously - to support your spine and the different ways Inflexible hamstrings (the long muscles at in which they are bought into play. It is all the back of the thighs) may predispose peo- too easy to strain your back simply by stand- ple to back pain. These muscles pay out ing wrongly, sitting in a badly designed whenever you bend forwards so that your chair, leaning over a desk, or sleeping on a hips do most of the bending. If your ham- mattress which should have been thrown out strings are tight your back has to curve fur- years ago. ther and this will increase the risk of back problems. There is no single ideal posture since people come in all shapes and sizes. The ideal pos- A stiff back may not cause you trouble now ture for you is one in which your back is put but it may lead to back pain at a later date. under the least strain and in which the spine However, there are therapies to alleviate is curved naturally. The essence of good back pain by making the back more supple posture is fitness. If you keep your muscles and which are often successful. well toned and supple you stand a good Andy Goring can be contacted at the Sports chance of achieving the correct posture for Massage & Injury Clinic at the Sports you. Centre, University of Surrey. Tel: 01483 - 452028. ed980122.qxd 25/11/98 22:17 Page 12 (1,1)

12 Sport Thursday 22nd January 1998 n Campusport WELCOME BACK

Welcome back for the new semester. The Lunch Time Social Sports programme ‘kicks off’ on Monday 9th February (entries in by 28th January at the Sports Centre please) and on offer is 5-A-Side Football (Tuesdays 12.00), Mixed Netball (Tuesdays 1.00 p.m.), Indoor Cricket (Wednesdays 1.00 p.m.), Evening Soccer at the Varsity Centre (6.00 p.m.), Pop Lacrosse (Thursdays 1.00 p.m.), Mixed Badminton (Fridays 1.00 p.m.) and Ballroom Dancing (Fridays 1.05 p.m. in the University Hall).

BUSA TRAMPOLINING

The University of Surrey will be hosting this Regional event involving over 200 competitors on Sunday 8th February 1998. This year the preliminary championships have been organised to take place at the Sports Centre between 9.00 a.m. - 5.00 p.m. Both Novices and Intermediates will be competing, including a number of Surrey students, while our top performers - CAROLINE SMITH (Nursing) who is ranked 7th at Ladies Open National A Level and LOUISA PHILIPSON (Psychology) Ladies Open National B Level, will be helping to judge the event and will be performing demonstrations. The top 20 men and women from each grade will take part in the Final Championship which will be held at Bath University in March. Do come along and support Surrey at these heats. CLASSES & COURSES Classes and Courses have started (first week free this week!). Lots of aerobic, sport, dance and circuit classes to choose from. Dance courses include Ballet, Tap, Street Dance and new this term ... LAROC ... a dynamic, exciting form of Latin American jive that will leave you tingling all over. Collect your brochures from the Sports Centre and sign up for our courses before they get too full.

And while we’re talking Latin American, advance notice of another of our successful LATIN AMERICAN EVENINGS at the Varsity Centre on Friday 20th February. Tickets on sale next week. Book early so you’re not disappointed - these evenings are always a sell out! What IS Jiu Jitsu?

Double Trouble (and helper)

Jiu Jitsu experts -er- in action at the Christmas ball rom previous articles you may be under the impression that all the Jiu ups won’t kill you as much). The club is FJitsu club does is drink. In fact, this is also very social, going to Chancellors or the not the case. The majority of the club went Union after every training session (and you to the Christmas Ball ... and stayed perfectly don’t _have_ to drink!). If you’re interested, sober (ha ha !). Especially Dave who you show up to any session, or one of our special may remember by his green shirt and mistle- beginners’ sessions on Wednesday 28th toe (all stories gratefully received via the January (week 2) or Sunday 1st February. club pigeonhole!). His partner-in-crime, Richard, also used copious quantities of E-mail Hannah (ma41hp@ee) or Jon mistletoe having a great night, but was dis- (cv61jh) or see our web site turbed early the following morning (com- (http://www.ee.surrey.ac.uk/Societies/jitsu/) plete with hangover) by the arrival of his if you want encouragement or more info. “friends” parents. However not everyone needed mistletoe, as Clare set out to prove. The Jiu Jitsu Club is holding special ‘begin- Overall, everyone enjoyed the snow, danc- ners sessions’ on Wed 28th January 8-10pm ing, free food, Father Christmas etc. and we and Sun 1st February, 5:30-8pm. Anyone can’t wait to report on the next social! welcome.

Seriously, Jiu Jitsu is a martial art used for self-defense. While we still wouldn’t recommend wandering the streets at night, learning Jiu Jitsu does improve your confi- dence and can help you protect yourself in an emergency. Funnily enough, it won’t turn you into Steven Seagal overnight night ... but it is (usually!) enjoyable and over time improves your general fitness (so the warm-