week thirteen semester two 2013 honi soit honi

Syria: Damascus is Burning p 12

Take a walk on the wild side p 14

Opinion competition winners p 18

Unigate Awards p 27 voices from the fringe DISCONTENTS Washington DC in Unseen, unheard, unwritten 4 the USSC In 2013, we’ve brought you ideas big It’s easy to underestimate a weekly society, have little contact with the out- Tim Anderson and small, new and old, left and right, student newspaper with a circulation side world, and are often ostracised but when it comes down to it, the one of 4000. We don’t have the reach or the upon their release for having a criminal thing we have not done is shy away from resources of bigger publications and record. Their voices, perpetually, are Faces behind the being shamelessly political. news outlets. Nor do we have the ability silenced. Which part of this process is 7 rhetoric Voicing dissent, critically engaging to influence social discourse on a regu- “correctional”? Astha Rajvanshi with the status quo and consistently lar basis like the mainstream media does More than half of this week’s paper is reporting on inherently political issues (vagina incidents aside). But we cater to written by women. Considering the per- like the staff strikes represent a robust a decidedly different sector of the popu- petual underrepresentation of women in The kindness of student voice, not a corrupt machine. lation and this is a privilege as much as it news publications, this is an important, 9 strangers Many may disagree with the death of is a restriction. relevant, and local instance of hearing Patrick Horton objectivity, but why be objective when Honi is uniquely positioned to shine the very voices which are the minority in you can be honest? a light into the University’s sewers and mainstream media. There’s a brutal honesty to this final tunnels, to be a place of refuge for We won’t pretend to give a platform Breaking the cycle edition of Honi Soit, the paper you hold voices from the fringe. In 23 editions, for the account of every silenced person 10 of victim blaming in your hands. Continuing our tradition we have told your stories, and ours too. – every voice from the fringe – but here Anonymous of focussing on the marginalised voices One woman, who was sexually are a few: seen, heard, written. of the people who walk among us, we assaulted in college earlier this year, urge you to rub your weary eyes and went on to suffer untold trauma. The Damascus is burning read between the lines. act occurred in the aftermath of a 12 Alex Downie Throughout the years, Honi has fos- drunken initiation ritual, and remained tered a culture of civil disobedience unspoken of until now. She has finally and social critique. This week’s ticker found a voice in a personal recount on tape consists of stand-out headlines page 10, albeit one that is still cautious Honi Soit Opinion from previous editions of Honi. Some about speaking out against the institu- 18 Competition winners of them are hilariously pertinent (find: tion which simultaneously made a vic- the one about campus food), while oth- tim out of her and denied even mere ers deliver shocking insights into the acknowledgement of her suffering. Mariana Podesta-Diverio minds of our alumni predecessors (see: Our justice system places individu- and Xiaoran Shi THE SOIN “Democracy was always a stupid idea”, als behind bars for breaking the law 26 1990). (page 17). Prisoners are secluded from Editors-in-chief

Editors-in-chief: Mariana “MPD” Podesta-Diverio and Xiaoran “X” Shi Editors: Rafi “Pound the alarm” Alam, Bryant “Brian” Apolonio, Max “Chalmy” Chalmers, Avani “Avadavadoo” Dias, Nick “Rowbocop” Row- botham, Hannah “SULS” Ryan, Nina “Baldy” Ubaldi, Lucy “L-Dubya” Watson. Reporters: Ben Brooks, Alex Downie, Andre Fenby, Joseph Istiphan, Georgia Kriz, Stella Ktenas, Grace Lin, Ellen O’Brien, Sean O’Grady, Shannen Potter, Astha Rajvanshi, Tom Raue, Cameron Smith, Caitlin Still, Harry Stratton, Matilda Surtees, Isobel Yeap, Evan Van Zijl. Contributors: Tim Anderson, Milly Ellen, Patrick Horton, Daniel Swain, Peter Walsh. Photographers and cartoonists: Mikaela Bartels, Stella Ktenas, Rose McEwen, James Lawler Duggan. Cover: Alexandra Mildenhall Mega Crossword: Dover Dubosarsky WOULD YOU RATHER... Ticker tape: Funny/weird/awesome headlines from (mainly) Have hairdryers for hands? ‘80s and ‘90s editions of Honi Soit The editors of Honi Soit and the SRC OR acknowledge the traditional owners of this land, the Gadigal people of the Eora nation. Have to blend all your food Honi Soit is written, printed, and distributed for eternity? on Aboriginal land. If you are holding this FAQ:

newspaper, you are standing on Aboriginal Hairdryers for hands sounds land. Recognise and respect this. great. Doesn’t that mean I would have voluptuous locks 24/7? Want to place an advertisement in Honi Soit ? Contact Amanda LeMay & Jess Henderson at [email protected] Yes, but hairdryers for hands = no Honi Soit is published by the Students’ Representative Council, University of Sydney, Level 1 Wen- hands to hold hairbrush in. So think tworth Building, City Road, University of Sydney, NSW, 2006. The SRC’s operation costs, space and voluptuous rat’s nest. administrative support are financed by the University of Sydney.Honi Soit is printed under the auspices of the SRC’s Directors of Student Publications: Clare Angel-Auld, Adam Chalmers, Bebe D’Souza, Brigitte Garozzo, James O’Doherty, Lane Sainty. All expressions are published on the basis that they Will I even have to blend, like, are not to be regarded as the opinions of the SRC unless specifically stated. The Council accepts no steak and three veg? responsibility for the accuracy of any of the opinions or information contained within this newspaper, nor does it endorse any of the advertisements and insertions. Printed by MPD, Unit E1 46-62 Maddox St. Alexandria NSW 2015. Yes. Mmm, lumpy steak smoothie. The new protein shake! @honi_soit

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many more of my friends indulge, but ally made it to university. Which is why the stigma around it makes talking about I think it’s important to consider break- it comfortably (and soberly) pretty dif- ing free of the dominant culture at the ficult. Anonymous wrote about how she university which squawks that success is SOUND& struggles to find porn interesting, but a cadetship or a grad-job. Breaking free the struggle I (and a couple of friends) of this can bring many rewards, just as have is finding good porn. There’s breaking free of the culture at my pri- an awful lot of shitty, demeaning and mary and high schools did for me. fury frankly un-arousing stuff out there. This isn’t, of course, for everyone. I’ve wasted countless hours trying to But we should all at least consider this find decent, stylised, female-friendly option of being free from lecturers and for the entire 5,537 students that voted porn. Tumblr and Reddit are the stan- free from bosses. Free to be yourself. this year or the 4,873 that went to the dard options, Anonymous might find Don’t just let the squawking bird deafen polls in 2012. Correction something a little more sensual and to you. It’s a lesson in the university of life As such, I propose two constitutional her tastes there. Even with these, find- that many, like me, missed from not tak- Last week, we wrote that the USU amendments to address both these ing anything more than pictures and gifs ing a gap year after school. And I’m as had passed on “the personal details of issues, in accordance with s 16 of the can be difficult if you don’t want to pay. excited for it as I was going into my first members to the USUAF”. We have been University of Sydney Union’s Constitu- Tumblr has links to seem very well pro- lecture all the way back in 2010. informed that this is not true, rather, the tion.The first being that election for the duced queer porn too, which is always USUAF sent the USU the email, which Drew Rooke executive is opened up to the public, enjoyable and empowering, a rare com- was then distributed on their behalf Arts IV concurrent to the election of new board bination. I ask her not to shy away from through the member mail. Honi Soit sin- directors in May. I hope this amendment her capitalist dream of making porn: do cerely apologises for the mistake. would, at a bare minimum, encourage it! Make some good porn and link me, if the current directors to either stick to you find Game of Thrones more arous- their promises or propose realistic plans ing than a woman asking a man to ejacu- at the time of their election. It would late on her glasses, I trust your artistic judgement. An Open Letter to the USU also hopefully ensure that executive appointments are based on merit and Anonymous A lot of words have been written their accomplishments in office (and Arts IV about the attempted sacking of the Vice their ability to communicate those suc- President of the University of Sydney cesses to the public), rather than on any A message from next year’s editors: Union (USU), Tom Raue, in the pages deals they make. Happy birthday to me of this paper and on social media. It has Hi eds (and SUBW), Honi Soit 2014 is on the lookout for alternately been described as a storm in And second, that the constitution be reporters, writers, photographers and a teacup and the death knell of democ- amended to provide for a ratification Just a teeny request - November 20 is artists. Whether you’re a long-time racy. It has dragged into the spotlight, mechanism by the Board’s member- my birthday; any chance of the gift of a reader, a veteran of the printed word, both the USU’s opaque and obfuscated ship in the event of a dismissal. Just free nude calendar? Heck, I’ll even make a cruciverbalist or a manic cartoonist, accountability mechanisms and, more as the constitution may be altered “by a donation to the Colong Foundation, we need your help to maintain Honi’s damningly, its views towards rank-and- a two-thirds majority of Members at just so I can brag about the best birthday long-standing tradition of radicalism file students. an Annual General Meeting” as per s present ever! and inclusivity. Students from all back- 16.1(a)(i) of the Constitution, any spe- Though it may be plain that my sym- Keep up the good work, and don’t grounds, faculties and campuses are cial meeting to sack a Director should forget the sunscreen. A burnt tush is encouraged to apply! pathies lie with Tom, I believe the Vice be accompanied by a members’ meeting President’s acquisition of an interlocu- never chic. • Name, degree, faculty, year, email and where the rank-and-file are represented Kind regards, tory injunction is no great win for union and can choose to validate or invalidate contact number members. Nor is it a great blow against the Board’s decision, by way of a similar Georgia O’Brien • How would you like to contribute to the Union. It is a functional victory, but two-thirds majority. Arts/Law II Honi Soit next year? not a substantial one. It will delay the • Do you have any other ideas for the probability that Tom will be terminated, I believe these suggested amend- ments are neither particularly unreason- Is there life after uni? paper? [e.g. what you liked, what could but the Court cannot enact the neces- be improved, and any sections you’d like able nor revolutionary. However, I do The end of university is near. The sary change required for the union’s to see (again) next year] members. think they would hypothetically prevent end of semester, and for many, the end Tom’s expulsion based on the current • Give us up to two examples of your Leaving the election or dismissal of of our time forever within these fabled grassroots movement (pun very much sandstone walls. Some expectations work (e.g. features, interviews, profiles, the Board’s executive in the hands of intended) that aims to him retain his creative writing, comics, satire, drawings, its directors circumvents the democratic have been met, and others neglected position. I don’t see why any current by what many of us didn’t realise when photography, puzzles, reviews, websites, process and allows a small cabal to allo- director would actively stand against blogs, apps, design work) cate, for themselves, tens of thousands we excitedly began is the multi-million a perestroika and glasnost of Union’s dollar business of a university. But what • It doesn’t have to be published/ of dollars in executive salaries, often decision-making beyond self-interest. based on pre-ordained deals between use is whining about this? Let’s think of launched, so whip up something now! individual directors and the support As it stands, every year the election of what’s next. • Send us a pitch of something you bases and campus factions that propped new directors is in some part operates The chatter among those finishing would write about (you can send more them up. The current electoral process as a power-play by the current board to of what’s planned for next year is loud. than one!) shore up the numbers for a presidential also means the constituency cannot hold Very loud. It’s like a squawking bird • Link us to an article you enjoyed read- run; returning that power directly to the their directors to account. Once a direc- that’s escaped its cage. University has ing. tor is elected to Board, for their two-year voters would hopefully encourage cur- trained this bird to squawk three words rent directors to sell their successes in • State any relevant experience you may term, their loyalty is tied fundamentally in particular: cadetship, internship, grad- have. to the Board as it is they, not the rank- office instead of expounding upon and job. and-file, who will ultimately be the arbi- creating more impossible promises. *No previous experience? Apply any- But what happens when we don’t way, we still love you! ters of promotion and demotion. Justin Pen think of what’s next? When we don’t lis- One of several reasons why the Arts/Law III ten to the squawking bird? Both my pri- [email protected] attempted dismissal of Raue struck a Fuck yeah, porn mary and high school (from years seven chord was the absence of discussion Dear Honi, to ten) were ones where opening a book between the Board and its members. A at lunchtime triggered taunts of “Nerd! I took great interest in the feature special meeting was called then delayed Nerd! Nerd!” and it was cool to be apa- article by Anonymous about staying Anyone can write and then injuncted, all without so much thetic in the classroom. home to watch porn I am one of the to Honi Soit! as a straw poll of the members’ mood. only people I know who openly speaks I’m thankful I wasn’t swallowed up Email all letters to: A snap action Facebook event was set about enjoying pornography, I consider by this, that I continued being enthusi- [email protected] up in response. I will admit that it and its it perfectly normal and healthy. I’m sure astic about learning and that I eventu- organisers cannot fundamentally speak

Ostracism Orlando Quasi Structuralism: An inquiry into values (1993) 3 HONI NEWS FREE Week Twelve Edition “OF OUR“Of ELABORATE our elaborate plans,PLANS, the THE end” END” Federal politics gets HECStic Student organisations and the University of Sydney are nervous about potential plans to privatise the government’s HECS debt, reports Max Chalmers The University of Sydney has called with students and the higher education Pyne’s next step will be to introduce an for caution and consultation after sector. We note Prime Minister Abbott’s American-style student loans system – reports that the Coalition government is pre-election assurances that in Govern- where private financial firms give out considering privatising its HECS debt. ment the Coalition would provide the loans at extortionate rates, and saddle The West Australian reported last week higher education sector with stable and students with debt for the rest of their that the government was planning to consultative government,” a University lives,” Pink told Honi Soit. convert the $23 billion debt into a finan- spokesperson said. However, Pink and Tyrrell’s dire warn- cial product in order to help the budget The reports have sparked concerns ings may prove premature with senior bottom line. that students could face higher interest members of the government playing The news has drawn a mixed reaction rates and be put under greater pressure down the prospect of the debt being with the University of Sydney calling on to repay the loans quickly in the future. sold. The Australian reported late last the government to ensure stability in National Union of Students President week that Treasurer Joe Hockey’s office the tertiary education sector which was Jade Tyrrell warned media outlets that had reaffirmed that such plans were not rocked by the $2.3 billion worth of cuts privatising the debt could move Austra- included in current Coalition policy. enacted by the previous Labor govern- lia closer to the burdensome loans sys- But for now it appears that Hockey has ment earlier this year. tem used by US Universities. avoided rulling out a change to that pol- icy at a later date. “Why is David Pink so mean to me?” - “The University of Sydney would be Sydney University SRC President Federal Minister for Education and Poodles very concerned about any tinkering to David Pink echoed Tyrrell’s sentiments. Christopher Pyne the HECS scheme without consultation “[Minister for Education Christopher] @maxchalmers90

USSC pushes Washington’s line OPINION Tim Anderson on the lack of diversity coming from the USSC on Syria The US Studies Centre (USCC) at the ANU), Dr Adam Lockyer (former sol- course, was to destabilise or topple any University of Sydney was set up specifi- dier now lecturer at the USSC) and Tom government which developed indepen- cally to counter a fear of rising ‘anti- Switzer (journalist, Liberal Party candi- dent political will, in the oil rich region. Americanism’ in Australia, during the date and part-time teacher at the USSC). But you won’t hear this from the US Iraq war. Judging from a recent infor- No one on this panel presented any Studies Centre. mation session its founders can be well sort of critical examination of the US Despite substantial evidence contrary satisfied. role in the Syrian crisis. The conflict was to the Washington’s version of events, A USSC panel discussing the US role said to be a civil war, including regional no doubt was expressed from the panel in Syria (as part of a recruitment evening players, but with “bad guys on both that the Syrian Government was respon- for post-graduate students) repeated sides”. The US was presented as a dis- sible for the August chemical attack in most of Washington’s talking points interested umpire, with the Syrian crisis Ghouta (East Damascus). about the Syrian crisis: for example, the a challenge to Washington’s standing as Nor was there any mention that US US was an independent mediator, ready the world’s moral leader. ally Saudi Arabia has armed and funded to perform its global policeman role but No one on the panel showed any the conflict from the beginning. The Sau- facing difficult moral ambiguities. interest in reminding the audience that dis cannot re-export arms without spe- USSC CEO Dr Bates Gill opened it was Washington – through proxies cific US approval. So how is it possible Is the USSC too soft on America? the session and handed over to John such as Saudi Arabia – that funded and to understand the claimed ‘arbiter’ role While it has sought credibility by posi- Barron (ABC journalist and part- armed the network of religious fanatics of the US in Syria without also appre- tioning itself within Australia’s oldest time teacher at the USSC), Professor who became Al Qaeda in Afghanistan ciating that Washington has directly or university, the USSC has external fund- Amin Saikal (invited guest from the and, more recently, in Iraq. The aim, of indirectly backed the (often foreign) ing, external management, and main- ‘rebels’ from day one? tains tight control over its curriculum Dr Saikal repeated the Islamist line, and teachers. This is unlike any other adopted by Washington, that Syria’s academic unit. The arrangement may political system is a minority ‘Alawite help explain why the USSC teaches an regime’ dominating a Sunni majority. entire course on the arrogant US doc- In fact, as a report prepared for NATO trine of ‘exceptionalism’, and nothing shows, most Sunni Muslims in Syria on imperialism and neo-colonialism. reject the Islamist ‘rebels’ and support Students enrolling at the USSC should President Assad. The decades long ide- know that the centre was set up as a pro- ological background to the conflict is paganda tool to counter ‘anti-American- not Alawi v. Sunni but rather a struggle ism’ in Australia, and that it remains a between Arab nationalism and sectarian place where they will not be encouraged Salafi-Islamism, mostly led by the Mus- to participate in serious critical discus- lim Brotherhood. Any serious student sion. of Syrian history should understand Tim Anderson is a Senior Lecturer in Politi- this. The USSC Syria discussion panel cal Economy

4 To strip or not to strip (1993) www.honisoit.com news

led by second-year SULS Queer Offi- #efficient”. If efficiency was their guid- Students delegates up for grabs. cer Matt Yeldham, is doing its best to ing principle, we’re not sure why they Discounting the infamous Master All the rumours, hearsay, and downright make Fetch happen. In what the Gate went on to make 17 more videos. Shang and the joke ticket Legion of slander from the world of student believes to be a first for student -elec On a more serious note, Electoral Spoon, the two major tickets – Elevate politics and culture tions, Fetch has released its very own Officer Kathleen Heath has confirmed and Grassroots – are recruiting cam- ringtone, recorded by Law student Meri that she received evidence about mem- paigners from other campuses, primarily HONI NEWS The sound of SULS Amber. Fetch is also promising an app, bers of the Fetch ticket soliciting sup- Sydney Uni. FREE Week Twelve Edition “Of our elaborate plans, the end” If you’re reading this, it means Uni- something the 2013 Honi Soit team can port for their campaign prior to the Although Grassroots, headed by Gate has died. Just kidding – it means assure them is far easier to promise than campaign commencement date. She presidential hopeful Andy Zephyr, has that the final vote has been cast on the to deliver (Eds’ note: our Android app is made a ruling that this was prohibited by a few members of Socialist Alternative 2013 Sydney University Law Society coming out next week, we promise). And in the Electoral Regulations and required flown in from other states, it pales in election and a result is nigh. Although its final innovation, Fetch put on a ‘Chat that members of Fetch contact any stu- comparison to Elevate, backed by NLS you could be forgiven for wondering with Matt’, where Law students could dents who received such messages and and Unity. Rumours suggest that up to why a simple faculty society election has send in questions to Fetch’s Pres candi- issue a formal acknowledgement of 40 campaigners from interstate, help- a two-week campaign period, spending date for him to answer via webcam at their breach. ing out at the Miranda by-election, were cap and t-shirts, as SULS people seem the awkward time of 8pm on a Saturday asked to stick around to help out the to hate Honi commenting on, SULS night. The Gate was busy doing some- USYD students stack UTS elections Elevate candidate Alison Whittaker. has a pretty epic budget, and an epic thing fun at the time and only managed election to match. The election hasn’t to tune in half an hour after the start- A quick look-around UTS this week In a not-so-surprising twist, members been all that Drumatic, and indeed the ing time, by which point the Chat was and you’d be forgiven for thinking it had of the breakaway Sydney Labor Stu- t-shirts of both tickets were certainly already over. Fetch has also managed to become a satellite campus for Sydney dents factions are aiding Grassroots at very Fetching. squeeze full-colour posters and glossy Uni. UTS is one of the few campuses UTS in order to help break NLS’s presi- The two tickets, Drum and Fetch, flyers into the $750 spending cap. left in the state that continues to have dential winning streak, meaning that an ‘open campus’ for their student elec- NLS at their last stronghold in NSW. are close together on the rainbow (pink One area where Fetch hasn’t inno- tions – that is, non-students can cam- and lavender, what) but yards apart on vated, however, is its videos, with sev- Rumours also suggest that Sydney paign. campaigning techniques. Drum, led by eral online commentators pointing out University campaigners will mill around current SULS VP and SRC Exec mem- that Fetch’s flagship video and the 2012 This makes the campus ripe for the and make snarky comments about the ber James Higgins and managed by Voice for UNSW SRC video have the proxy war student factions wage every UTS campus. The Gate will report on arch-hack Alistair Stephenson, has gone same weird cinematography and the year. National student factions such as these incidents from the ground. down the traditional route of posters, exact same song. When asked about it the National Labor Students (Labor t-shirts (85 of them, which is still less on Twitter, @fetchforsuls responded: Left), Student Unity (Labor Right), and Alas, the end has come too soon; the Gate than Fetch’s 100), a Facebook page, a “there certainly was some inspiration Socialist Alternative have a lot to gain says goodbye to print. For more in the coming website and a few videos. But Fetch, from other videos already on YouTube. from UTS, with 7 National Union of weeks, see honisoit.com

Students’ Representative Council, The University of Sydney

NOTICE OF THE MEETING OF THE REPRESENTATIVES-ELECT OF THE 86th STUDENTS’ REPRESENTATIVE COUNCIL

A meeting of Representatives-elect of the 86th SRC will be Two Student Housing Officers held on Monday 4th November, at 6pm in the Refectory, Main Two Welfare Officers Quadrangle. Chairperson of the Standing Legal Committee The following positions are open to nomination from members of the Director of Finance undergraduate student body: Director of Operations Vice-President Six Directors of Student Publications General Secretary Orientation Committee Education Officer Women’s Officer The following positions are open to nomination from members of Two Disabilities and Carers Officers the 85th Council: Two Environment Officers Five Executive members Two Ethnic Affairs Officers Five Finance Committee members Two Global Solidarity Officers Four Grievance Committee members Two Indigenous Students’ Officers Two Inter-Campus Committee members Two Inter-Campus Officers Two Standing Legal Committee members

Two Interfaith Officers Positions in italic cannot be shared (SRC Regulations Part One Section Two International Students’ Officers 3d). All other positions may be split ONCE only (Part One Section 3c). Two Mature-Age Students’ Officers Nominations shall be taken from the floor at the meeting. However Two Queer Officers nomination forms may be requested in advance from the SRC office. Two Residential College Officers Descriptions of positions are found within the Regulations Two Sexual Harassment Officers of the SRC (available on the SRC website). Two Social Justice Officers Authorised by Lisa Brennan, Secretary to Council. Students’ Representative Council, The University of Sydney Phone: 02 9660 5222 | www.src.usyd.edu.au

Government breaks fees promise (1986) 5 news @honi_soit

Opposing government homophobia OPINION Evan van Zijl discusses splits in the queer community towards Abbott’s queer policies This year, Tony Abbott won an elec- tion, taken on causes which other cuted by police and frustrated by the tion with a ‘mandate’ that included rac- groups found too marginal to advocate lack of progress achieved by lobbyists ism, sexism, climate skepticism, and the and this begun with marriage equality instigated the Stonewall Riots. Derided idea that our marriage rights are nothing which only after this consistent agitation by gay lobbyists as counter-productive, more than a ‘fad’. This new regime is became popular enough for lobbyists to the powerful actions at the Stonewall coupled with a series of state Coalition much later coalesce into AME and the Riots, after which our own Oxford governments that are waiting to prose- machine which elected Alex Greenwich Street bar is named, led to the birth of cute their conservatism without federal to parliament. Over the years, this tak- activist groups across the world that are opposition from the Greens. ing up of ‘radical’ ideas has seen CAAH directly responsible for the decriminali- Already, Abbott has enacted refugee stand up for queer refugees, victims of sation of homosexuality. This is echoed riage equality regardless of their views policies using his executive power that police brutality and harassment at Mardi in our own history of queer rights, with on queer refugees, HIV funding or hate will place those fleeing to Australia from Gras, and endorse actions for sex and the original Mardi Gras condemned by speech and now condemned CAAH for homophobic countries in great peril, gender diverse the more moder- its explicit opposition to Abbott. pledged to repeal anti-hate speech laws rights amongst Regardless of community division, ate elements of and proposed cuts to public services other things. a rally and a movement is much our community Regardless of community division, that can only be harmful to our com- This agitation who now profit a rally and a movement is much more munity. In less than nine months, Tony and tendency more than a popularity poll or a so greatly from than a popularity poll or a feel good Abbott shall no longer have to contend toward mass feel good exercise. It is a series of it. exercise. It is a series of actions that with the challenges presented by the action is integral actions that provide the building These divi- provide the building blocks for change Greens in the Senate and will pass leg- to most of the blocks for change which, like our sions within which, like our sexualities and genders, do not always please everyone in the islation with little to no oversight within progress gained sexualities and genders, do not queer communi- the parliamentary system. in Australia, ties on the issue mainstream. It is important that we always please everyone in the build movements that push agendas At the moment, Community Action including better of opposition rather than encourage passive support. Against Homophobia (CAAH) is the conditions for mainstream. versus submis- CAAH’s recent anti-Abbott action was only group in NSW that consistently our workers and sion can still be the beginning of this push and hope- mobilises large amounts of people protections for our precious environ- seen quite clearly today around the issue fully, like Mardi Gras, an opposition to despite the criticism it receives from ment. Gay liberation movements within of how to respond to an LNP govern- government homophobia can also move groups like Australian Marriage Equal- the United States have resorted to simi- ment. Over the course of the federal on from community division to one ity (AME). CAAH has, from its incep- lar levels of agitation in order to achieve election, AME has offered endorsement its goals. In 1969, a community perse- to LNP candidates who support mar- with immeasurable traction. Mass debating pay Ever wondered why your friends that are debating coaches get payed so much? Harry Stratton tells us why Some coaches urge on their teams with coaches on an annual retainer well into by a cartel of “co-ordinating coaches”, acid put-downs; others try to encourage five figures for five hours’ work a week. themselves paid up to $200 an hour. them with honeyed praise. One of my How did the market decide that teach- Since debating is a “specialist” activity, high school debating coaches was a lit- ing small children to be sophists - which these co-ordinators make the decision tle different. Someday, he would say, our many coaches sheepishly admit they’d to hire or fire with minimal school over- weekly sacrifice of Friday nights and do for free - should be valued at more sight, meaning that the market for this social respectability would be rewarded than six times the minimum wage? Part type of labour is limited to those who with what he only ever referred to as the of the reason lies in the fact that some know particular co-ordinators in the “package”. His eyes growing starry with of these schools simply have an awful very small and embarrassingly inces- dollar signs, he would describe debating lot of cash to throw around, but even tuous debating community. This cartel coaching’s genius hourly rates. Perhaps at the richest schools sports coaches are does not in any way set out to be as such. which are unable to pay such exorbitant if we pushed ourselves we might even paid at much more reasonable rates of While undoubtedly there is a degree rates are simply priced out of the com- land a job at King’s, where the health around $20 an hour. Moreover, when of nepotism, for co-ordinators over- petition, and thus competitions are won insurance was all-inclusive and the Cab- there are comparative few schools which whelmingly see themselves as choosing - each and every year - by the schools Charge vouchers seemed to be thrown can devote so much money and effort to the coaches best able to win debates, able to pay for the best coaches. (Even around like confetti. The included park- debating (and many devote even more and adjudicators often prove them right in public school competitions, elite ing space was all the more attractive effort to concealing their more prof- against schools with more limited bud- inner-city selectives like Fort Street and precisely because none of us - coach ligate pay rates, even from their own gets. But there lies the problem. Since Sydney Boys receive an unfair advan- included - could drive. junior coaches), you would assume that the same community of current and for- tage, since their predominantly high- David was almost certainly exagger- debating would be an employer’s market. mer coaches are also employed to decide er-SES parents are better able to pay ating when he described Parramatta’s Part of it comes from multiple concur- what is good and bad debating, the lab- debating subscriptions and thus afford fertile pastures, but the striking thing is rent debating competitions each seek- yrinthine set of standards they create to debating’s wages.) The second is that that he can’t have been exaggerating by ing coaches and adjudicators, and fierce mirror the community’s favourite man- a terrifying amount of money is spent much. Bluntly, the debating economy is competition from law firms who also nerisms effectively lock those not “in on supporting coaches’ expensive hab- absurd. An entry-level coach at a selec- believe that bullshitting is an employable the know” out of the market. It is from its, money that in the case of worse-off tive school that runs a comparatively skill, but neither of these factors explain here that several bizarre fads of high private and public schools could almost tight financial ship, such as Sydney Girls why Sydney’s debating coaches should school debating arise, including an odd certainly be better spent improving facil- High, can expect to be paid somewhere be paid about two times the wage of fascination with libertarianism and the ities and reducing class sizes. in the region of $45 to $50 an hour. The their Melbourne equivalents. weirdly specific verbal crutch “problem- Markets are highly efficient at catering atic”, now stripped of all subtlety and even more ridiculous thing is that this The truth is that - despite being an to consumer demand. Unfortunately, life to simply mean “bad”. Moreover, is considered selling oneself short. The overwhelmingly pro-market group of when that demand is culturally condi- since adjudicator’s pay rates rise in lock- more privileged and private the school, people, with a union (NSWDU) oper- tioned by the desires of the dominant step with those paid to coaches, it is in the more extravagant the wages, until ating exclusively as a front organisation economic force, it distorts prices to the their interest to reduce the labour supply exclusive GPS schools like Scots and for the training of the state team and point where there may as well not be a by maintaining those norms. Shore are reputed to pay more than the purchase of yum cha - the debat- market at all. $120 an hour to some of their coaches, ing economy is effectively controlled What are the results of this uncon- @strattonandon with one or two even rumoured to pay scious cartel? The first is that schools

6 A flaw by flaw guide to the law school for new students (1993) www.honisoit.com news

Faces behind the rhetoric FIRST PERSON Astha Rajvanshi had a poignant meeting with two refugees There are few occasions when we are be interested in reading western litera- the realisation of just how scarce and night: “Please don’t call us criminals. We confronted by the realisation of just ture surprised me – a symptom of the vulnerable human dignity was for them, were just like you – we lived a comfort- how large and fragmented the world discourse surrounding refugees and as they stood in front of their crowd, able life back home, but we didn’t have is, and how we form a tiny flicker in its asylum seekers as uneducated, unac- ready to relive their moments of pain any freedom. That’s why we had to do bizarre conjoinment. We live in realities, customed and illegal that pervades the with the determination to tell their story. this.” where the security, comfort and free- narratives cobbled together by the Aus- In between YouTube videos that To risk one’s life and livelihood, to dom we take for granted is so directly tralian media. brusquely exposed the chaos and calam- leave behind all loved ones indefinitely, parallel to someone else’s suffering and And yet, when I shook their hand ity in the streets of Iran’s cities with the and to embark on a journey no less helplessness. and introduced myself, it was maybe the killing and beating of unarmed pro- fraught with danger – these are not deci- Last week I met an Iranian refugee most anticlimactic, median exchange testors, he described his fight for the sions that one makes lightly or willingly. couple that had been released from of greetings, because they appeared to injustices of child labour and stifled But fear serves no place for those peo- detention a while ago. After a short stay be no different to me. They were both speech. ple for whom the ‘rule of law’ presents a in STUCCO, they were invited back by young – in their early 30s maybe, well In his solemn and sombre state, he very real threat to the fundamental idea fellow residents to share their story with educated and quite good-looking. He reflected, “You don’t know how lucky of freedom. In their devotion to human the student community. is a civil engineer, she a lecturer and you are to have the freedom to do and rights and human dignity, they point out My interest in attending the talk, put academic. Both were dressed casually: say what you want in this county.” the differences between acts of decency a rough pair of jeans with a sporty tee bluntly, was at best a feel-good act in the She spoke of her pursuit for education and barbarism in our world. and running shoes. superficial face of humanity. I am not and her passion for teaching – stories And yet, there is no light at the end an activist, nor have I actively taken part Perhaps the one thing that stood out about her childhood dream to become of the tunnel: the couple are haunted in the ongoing conversations on human between them and us was something a university professor, her curiosity to by their past, and continue to be treated rights and refugee politics. my friend described to me perfectly – a learn about every religion, gender and with contempt. They yearn for their I’d heard about the couple from kind of misery, etched into their faces. sexuality, and her desire to impart inde- family back home, but have given up a friend who was helping them find They were composed, polite and wel- pendent thought and reasoning on her comfort for conscience. And when the accommodation. They had, in a nutshell, coming, but they were worn out from students. government or the media frames the dis- exhaustion. fled Iran out of fear of persecution, and “I didn’t want them to end up like course around refugees with terms like arrived at Christmas Island by boat from Throughout our meeting, I remained sheep in a herd.” “illegals”, “detainees” or even “transfer- Indonesia, after which they were trans- silent. I didn’t want to be patronising or ees,” their helplessness falls deaf on the She described the inexplicable pain she ferred to Darwin, Adelaide and finally, voyeuristic, but mostly, I didn’t really ears of many and turns into a distorted felt in her legs from squatting for eight Sydney. know what to say. As my friend con- myth. hours as they hid in a truck full of peo- versed with them in Persian, he would On the day of our visit, my friend ple in Indonesia, waiting to flea the fear, But sending them back to their coun- occasionally turn to me and translate carried some books in his bag to give to waiting to get on the boat. try is not an option – it should never be, the woman – copies of Sylvia Plath and what was being said, largely for my ben- because people are not herds of sheep, In her eloquent yet emotionally dis- Agatha Christie – which she accepted efit. and they deserve not to be treated as so. traught state, she made a single plea that almost emphatically. That she would Even so, my silence was eroded with NEWS IN REVUE Caitlin Still writes an article about the exodus of Tony and the Burning Bush So Tony thought, ‘I will go over ‘I AM WHO I AM.’ This and see this strange sight - is what you are to say why the bush burns up.’ to the Australian public, ‘I AM

When the LORD saw that he has sent me to you had gone over to look, God to save you from the carbon tax. called to him from within the bush (yet when Tony said, I AM WHO

‘Tony! Tony!’ And Tony said, I AM, Shorten, unconvinced said, ‘Here I am.’ The Lord said “Mean you, Tony, yourself or myself ‘I have indeed seen the misery or let’s not bring politics or religion

of my people in the mountains. into this, thou upstart poet of I have heard them crying out Honi Soit.”) The LORD said, ‘The elders because of the carbon tax. of Australia will listen to you.

I am sending you to the mountains Say to them, “Let me take to bring my people the mountain-dwellers a three-day journey into the wilderness, into safe Liberal seats. And this and proclaim from the mount

will be the sign to you that climate change is crap.”’ So you will that it is I who have sent you: shrug your shoulders at the wonders When you have spoken I will perform on your land

of strange weather, you will continue and so you will wonder at the to deny climate change scorching summer, and so your people on this mountain.’ Tony will plunder the desert.’

said to God, ‘Suppose they ask me why all the flames? Then what shall I tell them?’ God said to Tony

Campus fruitcakes: a guide to nuts, weirdos and freaks you may meet on campus (1985) 7 news @honi_soit Breaking the glass ceiling with an M16 INTEL Avani Dias speaks to a woman who servied in the Israeli Defence Force “You turn on the television and I can’t The IDF boasts a strong female pres- port – Shahar paints a grim picture of Shahar had a number of passionate really explain to you the feeling that you ence among its ranks with one third Israel that isn’t too far from ordinary opinions, but it wasn’t until her views get… Well… You become numb.” of its forces and 51% of its officers as assumptions of the place. After finishing on the actual Israeli-Palestine conflict An ongoing struggle that has lasted women. In stark contrast 13.9% of the high school, students have to take tests came up that she became incredibly nearly 70 years, the Israeli-Palestine Australian Defence Force is made up and put in their preferences for which emotional. Her solution was to build a conflict has become quite tedious. But of women, and the UK and America military unit they’d like to serve in. They big wall that would separate “us from for locals, it’s another level of desensi- are only slightly behind that. Since the have many options to serve in the IDF them”. She argued that the West Bank tisation entirely. “Everyday there’s a ter- founding of the state in 1948, Israel is from ordinary occupations like marines, wasn’t Israel’s to take. “We took it from rorism attack and 30 or 40 or 50 people the only country in the world with a builders, and nurses, to more complex them in a war… okay, point taken. But are killed or injured badly… you just mandatory service period for all women. ones like working for rescue missions, now we can give it back and we need become numb.” Shahar said that it was something she or in intelligence. But one striking devel- to move on.” But the worst part for opment in the IDF is that as of 2000 her was the fact that she did not have It’s midnight on a Friday and I’m always knew she’d have to do, but that the Military Service law states explicitly a choice. She didn’t want a connection Skyping Shahar Kichler – a 23-year- didn’t stop her parents trying to protect that women have equal rights as men to to Palestine but she was forced to have old woman living in Israel. Her English her from it. “There’s a sentence that par- serve in any role in the defence force. one. “Why does an 18 year old girl need is average and she is finding it hard to ents say to their children in Israel when to know how to shoot a fucking gun? I articulate to me just how strongly she they are young… ‘don’t worry, when Shahar was put in the education unit don’t want to shoot a gun.” feels towards the monotony that is this and was posted as a social worker in her age-old battle. In Hebrew, her name "Why does an 18-year-old mandatory two years. She helped disad- The military is central to Israel and means ‘Dawn’ and to reduce the cultural girl need to know to shoot a vantaged kids and young criminals start Shahar argues that people in the defence barrier she asks me to call her that. fresh and helped them develop a new force have much better opportunities way of thinking. than those who aren’t. It’s almost as To their audience, Israel attempts to fucking gun? I don't want to though it’s the only platform that gives project an image of progressive views shoot a gun." “Think about when you were 18… women the equal opportunity they and modern European life. In 2011 how many responsibilities did you have you grow up you won’t have to go to have been fighting for. A number of Tel Aviv held its first fashion week in in your life? You had nothing. I got to the army’... but that never happens. This Shahar’s friends are still in the military, 20 years. The controversial Twitter be a social worker when I was 18 with- is the dream - it’s a fantasy.” A parent’s serving longer than their mandatory and Facebook accounts of the govern- out any education or anything.” Some- over-protectiveness of their child has a period requests, but she decided to leave ment are used as a tool of self-defence times she was brutally candid with her different meaning in a war torn country. and study to become a copywriter or a against Boycott, Divestment, and Sanc- responses. Shahar started speaking writer for an advertising agency. When tions movements around the world. The Shahar grew up in Ramat Gan, a city about some of her experiences serv- I asked her if she thought that the gen- rationale behind these cultural and tech- ten minutes from Tel Aviv. She was born ing in the army – other soldiers throw- der equality in the military transferred nological developments may be ques- into a war and because of the frequent ing chairs at her, men swearing at her to other walks of life in Israel she sim- tionable, but there is no doubt that the terrorist attacks, wasn’t allowed much as because they disagreed with what she ply said, “you just need to be ambitious Israeli Defence Force (IDF) is the most a child. said, but these were all justifiable for or aggressive enough when you need progressive in the world, at least statisti- Terrorists killing people with knives, her: “It’s educating in the end. It makes to.” It’s obvious the IDF has given her cally speaking. bomb blasts, and a fear of public trans- you grow stronger”. enough training in that. Mise-en-seen NETIQUETTE Mariana Podesta-Diverio wishes that she couldn't see that you've 'seen' and when you've 'seen' it, because it's deeply concerning

In 1943, Antoine de Saint-Exupéry We are increasingly being expected, and catch myself checking back to message reach into the different facets of our wrote in The Little Prince that “The inadvertently pressured, to be constantly threads, curious about whether or not lives and begin to replace limbs that we essential is invisible to the eye”. I doubt on the ball with replies. This is likely the my recipient has opened the last mes- didn’t even know we needed. It’s only a he knew the extent to which the precise culprit for our ever-increasing obsession sage I sent them. This year, particularly, matter of time before we forget what it opposite (or something like it; bear with with being plugged in, contactable, and when chasing stories for Honi and mes- was like before we knew exactly when me) should be true in 2013: that our active on social media and email all day. saging people outside of my friendship people had seen our messages. Relying eyes be invisible to the essential. The Long gone are the low-pressure days circle, it’s become an unshakeable crutch on the ‘seen’ feature - in Facebook, text essential, in this case, being Facebook of taking your sweet time to get back that I use to gauge how to approach a messages, and even applications like messages. to people, and nonchalantly waiting for story, whether or not Facebook is an Snapchat (‘opened’ vs. simply ‘deliv- 70 years after de Saint-Exupéry someone to reply to you. For they have appropriate method of contact, or even ered’) - will soon be as normalised as penned his nugget of genius, I melt now paved the way for anxiously await- wondering what the fuck a person is the act of sending messages itself when away the afternoon in front of my Mac, ing replies once we know our sent mes- doing awake at “[Seen:] 04:12”. I’ve we consider the dynamics of e-com- refusing to open a Facebook group sages have been read. become a monster. munication. In fact, it’s only a matter message thread that has been buzz- When it comes to obsessing over This is yet another inevitable of time before we’re all microchipped, ing with notifications for the past 72 ‘seen’, even I am red-handed with guilt, installment of technology’s increas- uniformed, lobotomised shells walk- hours. Meanwhile, simultaneously, my as I’m sure many of us are. I often ingly overbearing tentacles that ing in time to the monotonous beat of Facebook inbox is littered with prema- our Orwellian State’s omnipotent, turely ceased conversation threads, controlling drum. We’ll forget what evidence of flaky acquaintance- it was like before “Seen” - before ships, and an e-trail of people who social media and invasive technol- I now know to avoid in public, lest ogy controlled every facet of our the deafening levels of silence in existence. In the great words of Abe our virtual friendship permeate the Simpson: “I used to be with it. Then meatspace. Although it’s possible they changed what it was, and now to mark a message as “unread”, this what I’m with isn’t it, and what’s it brings an extra level of neuroticism seems weird and scary to me. to our online interactions. And it’s only a matter of time, In a world of ‘read’ receipts and non-Facebook users; Quoth Abe: surprisingly nerve-wracking “Seen: “It’ll happen to you, too”. 11:37” updates, there is little space to reply to messages in our own time. @mapodi Cartoon: Rose McEwen

8 Ending world hunger: an idea whose time has come (1985) www.honisoit.com news

The kindness of strangers FIRST PERSON Those two litttle words (or one if you spell it 'thankyou') aren't that hard to say, writes Patrick Horton Two lessons: strangers can sometimes less than before. My first thought was fortable. I obliged, continued offering hydra- be kind, and saying “thank you” is not to offer the woman my bathroom. My With the bathroom door still wide tion and sustenance to no avail. Very hard. One time I helped a man push second thought was that that’s a very open to provide light from the kitchen, quickly they withdrew themselves his car 200 metres uphill, and he barely strange thing to offer a stranger. My the woman’s husband stood to attention from my household, a kilo or two acknowledged my existence. Another third thought was that they might be outside to provide protection and moral lighter and looking at the ground. time I helped an old man in a broken frightened by such an uncouth sugges- support. I busied myself in the kitchen, Twenty minutes later I was taking wheelchair make it to the hospital, also tion from a bearded man with no shoes rummaging in the fridge drawer, rear- out the garbage and they were sit- uphill. Once my use was expended, he - the egg would be on my face. I looked ranging vegetables and beers for several ting there in the gutter, still waiting. I shrugged me off like I was the one that into her eyes. I saw the desperation, the minutes, just hoping it would end. But offer and awkward wave and a shrug, stank of shit. I’m sure this happens all torment within. “Would you like to use the bowels would not stop churning but I’m already forgotten. the time; compassion and neighbour- my bathroom? I live round the corner”, and she continued to splat, triggering And not a word of thanks. loving are the foundations of most I said. “Yes please!” - and we were on a flashback to when I shat myself on conceptions of morality, and humans our way. Post-haste we limped-jogged- a 20 hour train ride in India after some are generally ungrateful and self-enti- skipped, me attempting to make conver- funky chaat. The kitchen was no longer tled beings. Sometimes, though, when sation, her clutching her abdomen, him safe. Politely excusing myself with you go above-and-beyond, you want to helping her walk, looking gaunt. Pleas- an awkward, undignified smile to be thanked. You want that pat on the antries were not on the agenda. the husband, I darted to the liv- shoulder. Nearly there, I tried to explain the ing room, distracting myself with A week ago I was walking my girl- situation: shitty student house, messy a picture book about the uni- friend to the train station. From around bathroom with no light, candles usually verse. Planets materialize, stars the corner we heard banging, and when suffice, etc., but the language barrier and collapse, a squirt and a groan of we got there we saw a middle aged Chi- notable urgency of the situation made pain comes from down the hall. nese couple scurrying around franti- this difficult. Once inside I ran ahead, A black hole absorbs a galaxy, a cally, apparently trying to gain access to and in the bathroom illuminated only meteoroid is destroyed as it enters the station’s solitary toilet cubicle. She by the fluorescent tubes of the kitchen the atmosphere, a wince is barely was yelling and clutching her stomach; I tried to light a match for a candle – audible over a fart and a dribble. he was holding her and looking con- alas! A party had been thrown the night The universe forms, destroys cerned. Seeing us, the woman cried before and the flaccid, sodden match- itself, the moaning stops, and out asking if we knew how to open the box fell apart in my hands like wet finally she emerges, timid. I restroom door. I told them it’s closed at leaves. With no time to find a lighter, I did my best to be civil, offering night, and thinking this was just a case made way for the poor woman. I leaped water, tea, fruit – it’s important of Number One’s offered directions from the bathroom to the kitchen in the to keep hydrated when you’ve got to a nearby patch of scrub where she same moment her bottom hit the seat. the shits! – but the pair were too might subtly pop a squat. The couple Before you could say “extra mayonnaise, polite (and probably ashamed) to ran off as the train arrived and I saw thanks!” the not-inconspicuous effects take me up on it. my lady off. of an upset stomach assaulted the por- She hurriedly explained that celain and seemed to echo around the Homeward bound I came across their son will pick them up now, entire house. I became instantly uncom- the couple again, even more help- could I please text him my address? Cartoon: Mikaela Bartels

Kip off the old block PROFILE Sean O'Grady profiles USYD alumnus and dramaturge Kip Williams

Kip Williams wrote, directed and I find it hard to imagine the 25-year-old into his re-imagination of Verona. The world split into two distinct halves, but starred in a one-man play called The Dis- who has just bought me a beer pissing young men of the play have nothing to rather a portrait of a singular universe”. missal while he studied at the University anyone off. He is intelligent, thoughtful do but drink and fuck, and amidst this, Gender becomes the subject, and as of Sydney. The first act went for exactly and polite. For a man with a resume few the violence which drives the tragedy Juliet delivers the play’s prologue, gun to an hour. The second ended after sixty in the theatre industry can dream of, he seems inescapable. In his director's note, head, his imagination is realised. consecutive seconds of silence from the is remarkably humble. He likes to direct Williams explains that he has placed When asked what new theatre he is audience. If at any point an audience plays in whose words he finds a musical more emphasis on Capulet encouraging most excited by, Williams is enthusias- member tried to leave he yelled “fuck quality. It is no surprise then, that he is the marriage of Paris to Juliet. tic about productions that re-imagine you” at them so gutturally that finish- drawn to opera, to Dylan Thomas, and I ask him if he finds it hard, as a man, classic works and draw out themes of ing the show’s two-week run necessi- to Shakespeare. His family is musical. to make theatre that captures the experi- gender and class. It is there in Romeo and tated vocal steroids. Other members of Williams is the only one of his siblings ence of women. He describes himself Juliet. One has to imagine that Macbeth, the Sydney University Dramatic Society who did not study at the Conservato- as a feminist and that he thinks he has his next production, will also deliver in disliked his auteur-ship so much that his rium. He jokes that he might have gone a right to comment on issues of sexism, this regard. posters were vandalised. the same way if his voice hadn’t broken but adds that Juliet (Eryn Jean Norvill) awfully at 15. was an incredible collaborative resource. @sean_ogrady1 Williams’ most recent production, for the "If at any point an audience Sydney Theatre Com- pany, is a pared back member tried to leave he Romeo and Juliet. He yelled 'fuck you' at them adapted the work him- so gutturally that finishing self, reducing the cast size and subtly altering the show's two-week run roles, in order to focus necessitated votal steroids." on a patriarchy that robs women of their His imagination, to which our conver- expression and auton- sation often returns, is the only thing omy. Music and move- he lets limit his creative process. When Juliet and Friar Laurence in Williams' latest production ment are our entree reading Romeo and Juliet he saw “not a

Chaos - the theory which makes scientists write like poets (1990) 9 culture @honi_soit

FIRST Breaking the cycle of victim blaming PERSON Anonymous tells a private story of suffering and isolation at the hands of a culture that turns a blind eye TRIGGER WARNING: THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS DISCUSSION OF SEXUAL ASSAULT Before I begin my story, I want to hold me up and as I tried to push him growing pile of uni work heightened neck and it started choking me. Sud- make it clear that I believe College does away I fell backwards. He laughed, ask- my distaste for myself. On top of denly able to lift my arms, I tried to put offer some fantastic opportunities for ing if I was ‘alright.’ this I developed chronic depression. I my hands to my throat, but again they its students. When he led me into the corridor would dream of killing myself every- hit an invisible barrier. I was obsessively However, there is one facet of its filled with people, I pulled away and day. I stopped participating in college repeating in my mind that it wasn’t real. culture that I find offensive and detri- stumbled into the nearest room, col- life completely. One girl told me that Then it stopped. This happened a num- mental. That is the ‘blame the victim’ lapsing on the couch. When I woke up my lack of participation “wasn’t good ber of different times over the next few culture. I attended college for one I was in my college room. enough”. years and I was constantly terrified that semester and it was the most difficult I was still drunk well into the after- it would happen in public. time of my life. noon and I could hardly eat for the next Another girl agreed, saying Because I tried so many different In my first few weeks of college, I three days without feeling sick. I didn’t how it was awful – awful that medications, I had 73 tablets, all lined was chosen to attend an exclusive party tell anyone what happened. I was so up along my desk. I would watch them called the ‘bone room.’ Being selected embarrassed and felt like I behaved in the girl was just a drunken for hours, contemplating suicide. On is apparently a huge honour, so I went. such a disgraceful and uncontrollable slut who couldn’t handle her several occasions I would go out and Members from every college were cho- manner. drinks and was blaming drink heavily, then be terrified I would sen and I didn’t really know anybody kill myself if I went home alone. So I A few days later, I overheard a con- college culture so she didn’t else attending. versation at college dinner over an would take home boys. This contrib- Being an anxious, introverted person, article about something similar happen- have to take responsibility. uted greatly to my self-loathing. I found the whole situation incredibly ing to another girl at College. I found a To dull the psychological pain, I uncomfortable and drank to feel more bit of comfort in the fact that I wasn’t With the help of my brother, I started would self-harm. Afterwards I would relaxed. I was already drunk before the alone. One of the girls expressed how going to the USYD health service, be so scared and embarrassed that peo- drinking games at dinner, which I felt awful it was. and over the next few months, I tried ple would find out. obligated to participate in. Another girl agreed, saying how it a number of antidepressants. I also It was only until I started getting After this I have virtually no memory. was awful – awful that the girl was just began seeing a psychologist. better that I saw the link between my Although I found this horrible, it is not a drunken slut who couldn’t handle her Despite all the support I now had, self-hatred and the ‘blame the victim’ this event I’m trying to condemn. drinks and was blaming college culture my symptoms worsened. I began hal- comments I heard in College. Every other person seemed to have so she didn’t have to take responsibility. lucinating. I would hear things crawling Because of my social anxiety, these an awesome time, and I only found After that, things got even worse for across my floor and typing on my com- comments became representative of it awful because I don’t enjoy being me. Even though I have always been an puter. how I thought everybody viewed me. drunk. The few memories I do have, anxious person, I found it incredibly One night I became completely para- When I applied for college, I thought it however, haunted me for years. difficult to leave my room and would lysed when something suddenly jumped would be a place to live whilst I studied. One of the boys led me into a room stay in bed all day. Being from Victo- on me, painfully crushing my body. However, it is much more like a soror- and tried to have sex with me. Despite ria, the only immediate family I had was Absolutely beside myself with panic, I ity/fraternity. my drunken protests he kept trying and my brother, who would drag me out for eventually managed to move my body, People become very defensive about I think he actually did for a few seconds coffee every couple of days to keep me but as I lifted my arms and legs, they hit their respective colleges and people before I pushed him off. Being virtually out of my room. an invisible wall. who speak out against some aspects of unable to stand I was relying on him to Uni became impossible. The ever I felt something wrap around my its culture are condemned. Reclaim the night, reclaim our rights OPINION Talking about and marching against gendered violence is as important as ever, argues Ellen O’Brien While the birth and meteoric rise of lence narratives, the majority of vio- By taking our voices to the streets, notes that “Reclaim will only stop being the Internet has brought with it count- lence occurs in places familiar to the by hosting panel discussions, by invit- relevant when violence is no longer an less treasures, it has also delivered the victim including homes shared with ing all members of the community to issue.” Given the current state of dia- scourge of the modern Earth – inter- family, partners, and/or friends. hear representatives from the NSW logue in our papers and on our televi- net trolls, who spread their tentacles Despite a considerable lack of media Rape Crisis Centre and Scarlett Alliance sions, Reclaim may be destined to be into the social hub of our generation at interest, gendered violence is a serious (among others) speak, we aim to bring around for a considerable length of an unrivalled speed. Events attacked are issue in Australia that affects many peo- light to the serious nature of gendered time. The organisers and supporters of frequently activist in nature – anything ple on a daily basis. One woman will be violence, and to assist in changing the Reclaim the Night will be attempting to aimed at making our society a better killed by an intimate partner every week. culture that exists around such violence. change that on October 26 – come and and fairer place for all is fair game for One in three women over 15 will report In every community, attitudes need make your voice heard. these unruly fiends. physical or sexual violence sometime to be altered to reflect the multitude Reclaim the Night is an annual event pro- Most recently, the Reclaim the Night over their lifetime; unreported rates of realities that people affected by gen- testing all forms of violence against women. Sydney 2013 event page was targeted. (given the failings of our legal system) dered violence experience. The victim is Reclaim the Night Sydney 2013 will be held The tamest of comments was a clip are likely to be even higher. In Sydney, not to blame; it is not always as easy as on October 26 at Prince Alfred Park, Surry from The Dark Knight Rises posted with domestic and family violence is one leaving an abusive partner; violence can Hills. For more info: http://RTNsydney.com. the following remark: “Together we of the leading causes of homelessness and does occur in queer relationships; can help reclaim the night, Sydney has among women and children. the social stigma around sex work must become a hot bed of crime and sin, at Despite this data, heterosexual be completely destroyed. No matter the 7pm we will look to the skies for our domestic violence is rarely talked circumstance, jokes are never accept- salvation”. about and coverage is limited to seem- able. While Facebook trolling may seem Coupled with the other comments, ingly random high-profile attacks tak- relatively harmless, it is indicative of a their message became clear: talking ing place outside of the home. Even larger societal problem – that gendered about, and marching against, violence rarer still are discussions about vio- violence is not taken seriously because against women is pointless as the prob- lence within non-heteronormative it is believed the only “real” gendered lem does not exist. Or if it does, it does relationships, or whether government violence is the small percentage of not impact a significant portion of the responses to alarmingly high rates of cases covered in mainstream media. population to render it important. The violence are adequate for the diverse One of this year’s organisers of irony is, despite common gendered vio- range of people who use their services. Reclaim the Night, Katherine Bullen,

10 How to be a jolly good wife (1991) www.honisoit.com culture

Ashes to ashes: the CREATIVE aftermath of a bushfire Drew Rooke reports from the frontline in the Blue Mountains All is quiet now on St Georges Parade beach, littered with burnt logs and the Leaden ash puffs into the air as they ber 25, its roof buckled and insides in Mount Victoria, Blue Mountains. It’s rubble of the beautiful country homes continue rummaging as I walk away. turned to ash, a stack of dry wood is insidiously peaceful. Blackened leaves that once lined it. Further down the road, the white- untouched. Down the road at Number wash in the gentle breeze and the after- The silence is sliced by the clang of picket fence of Number 32 remains. 38-40, John’s mustard yellow rendered noon sun shines orange through a thick corrugated iron as a couple rummage Nailed to it is a white-tiled, mosaic brick home escaped unscathed. Burnt haze still blanketing the sky. trees surround it. He and his wife only A yellow street sign warning of an finished building this house six weeks approaching “DIP” is charred brown ago. Even his clothes-line survived. and a powerful smell lingers. Not just “We didn’t even lose one peg.” he of burnt wood, but of burnt plastic, laughs. Nor did they lose any spirit, and rubber, and iron. Ahead, a bearded today, they are back finishing the fence middle-aged man walks his dog down they started building last weekend. the middle of the empty street. “There’s no point moping about it, you “It’s devastating. What can you do know? Ya just got to get on with it.” though? It’s part of living in the bush.” His resilience is striking but not He despairingly raises his arms and unfounded elsewhere on the street. examines the destruction as he speaks. Suzanne and Gavin are also newcomers His name is Tony and, living just and had part of their property damaged ten minutes up the Great Western on Thursday. They’ve spent the after- Highway, he was one of those lucky noon helping neighbours extinguish to escape the raging bush fires fuelled spot fires around the area. by extreme winds that ravaged the area Suzanne shrugs. “We all know fires last Thursday. Photo: AAP happen up here. We’ll all carry on.” Her Across other parts of the Blue Moun- through the ruins of their brick home sign reading ‘Sunnyside’. But the house voice is calm and relaxed as she pushes tains and New South Wales, they con- for valuables. Four totally burnt-out it once enclosed is now a pile of still- the wheelbarrow of watering cans and tinue to burn and have so far claimed at cars sit in their front-yard, their win- smoking timber, melted glass and buckets back home. least one life and 193 homes. dows melted, not shattered. A tree- warped iron. The sun turns red as it falls to the The thumping beat of water-bomb- stump beside is still ablaze. A yellow fire hose stamped ‘Wood- horizon. Lines of burnt gumtrees ing helicopters above is a reminder the I walk inside and offer my help. They ford Blue Mountains AFS’ lies like the are beautifully silhouetted against a fire is still burning. It’s now at Mount refuse. Their eyes scream helplessness, shedded skin of a red-bellied black smokey, mauve sky. Rakes and spades York Road, just two kilometres away. but they know I can’t do anything right snake on the pavement leading to the are put down. Leather gloves slipped But there’s no more fuel here. The now. Only they know what they’re ruins. It was no match. But the flames off. As cicadas sing their Song of Life street now resembles a black-sand looking for amidst such destruction. chose their victims randomly. At Num- to those on this Parade.

Strictly no adults allowed OPINION OPINION Peter Walsh wonders what a pedophile looks like in popular culture Recently, I was asked to leave a park time on the swings, I had to ride the F this teacher is a blonde busty female. group, of Ronnie in Little Children who in Harlem, NYC. The security guard— Train on my lonesome back to Briar- They couldn’t be more impressed. ultimately finds himself incapable of apologetic—pointed to a sign that read wood. The whole thing felt like satire. “Nice”, says the police chief. “Ni- resisting his urges, and so castrates him- “NO ADULTS ALLOWED UNLESS Did I really resemble a pedophile? Hell, ice”, a fellow officer adds. They’re just self at the neighbourhood park. ACCOMPANIED BY CHILDREN”. what does a pedophile even look like? happy that Ike, the child, is “scoring”. I was feeling pretty down at this point, I couldn’t even begin to come up The more I looked, however, the more so I found myself circling back to South with a coherent, consistent image of I found that this pedophile—deranged Park, this time to an episode titled ‘The a pedophile—at least not one in pop and unsympathetic—was not represen- Wacky Molestation Adventure’. South culture. Humbert Humbert in Lolita tative anymore. Park, like Harlem, is suffering from looked quite respectable at the start. Think Cate Blanchette in Notes on a pedophile hysteria. The news carries a In contrast, the murderer in M was all Scandal. While the boy she sleeps with story saying that children are most likely wild-eyed and deranged. Surely there’s is much older than the five year old to be abused by their parents. So, the an insidious middle ground: the pedo- in South Park, she’s still undoubtedly parents evict their children from the phile who doesn’t look much like any- crossing some lines. town, so they can’t get to them. thing, the one that would necessitate But rather than dismissing her out- By the time I finished watching all excluding adults from our parks. right for her transgression, she becomes this, I realised the pop culture pedo- What’s more, while we’re practically an object of sympathy. She didn’t nec- phile could be anyone. Not easily hysterical over the possible pedophiles essarily touch the kid out of any sexual spotted from a crowd, not singularly lurking in our playgrounds, we still— dysfunction, just out of old relatable male, singularly deranged, or singularly 58 years removed from the publishing middle-class boredom: a snap reaction deformed. They’re marginally sympa- of Lolita—entertain a voyeuristic glee to the pressures of work and home. thetic, portrayed as passengers to their in watching these moral transgressions We hate the kid (little scouse bastard). own illness. Still, the contemporary in our art. So what does the pop culture Some victim he turned out to be. The pedophile is irredeemable, only now pedophile look like? same sort of moral quagmire appears they’re also indefinable. An episode of South Park—‘Miss in Hard Candy where we hate-hate-hate It’s this rampant possibility—that Teacher Bangs A Boy’—interrogated the pedophile, but at the same time sort they could be anyone or anywhere— Humbert Humbert and Lolita in Lolita (1997) both pedophilia and sexual double of feel sorry for him. Ellen Page is just that has us closing off our parks and It stung, mostly because I had just standards. While the whole town is ruthless as the 14 year old vigilante who keeping our children and young siblings been turned away at a bar for not having outraged at the thought of a teacher convinces him to commit suicide. Spoil- so firmly under thumb. ID and so instead of being able to kill seducing a student, they soon realise ers, by the way. Still, there’s the control

Bulging eyeballs: The benefits of porn (1979) 11 feature @honi_soit

Alex Downie investigates the impact of the Syria conflict – there and in Australia

48 year-old mother of four son – who remains in Syria – had During our interview, it was clear They also lobby the government. had sent her twelve year-old insisted that she leave. He pleaded that that K felt powerless as she watched I spoke with a founder of the Aus- A son to the shop to queue for any time she wasn’t at home he wor- her country implode. She didn’t tralian Syrian Association. In 2012, bread. While he was out, a rocket col- ried about where she was, and whether know how or when the war would he had met with Rudd, Carr, Gillard, lapsed his family’s apartment block. she was OK. end, and what would happen. She Abbott and other prominent politi- He was the only survivor. Eight mem- Today it is K worrying about her desperately clung to any news she cians, pressuring them to deny visas bers of his immediate family were son. She speaks with him via mobile could get of Syria, from family back to Syrian government diplomats, and killed within two years. The eldest son phone on most days, when the lines home or from media outlets. Indeed, shut down the Syrian embassy in of a relative is kidnapped by rebels for aren’t cut. There is a four-hour queue my weekday interview with K ended Canberra. They were thrilled when, weeks and held for ransom. Members to buy a kilo of bread from govern- exactly at noon, when she abruptly following Carr’s expulsion of senior of the village must continue to pay ment stores. He only bathes occa- left the room we’d been talking in. diplomats in May 2012, the embassy safety money, or more of them will sionally, when there is enough water. Her sister explained that she had closed down that July. be taken. His sleep is sometimes interrupted gone to a back room to watch the These organisations also maintain a This is the human reality of the cri- by the sound of rockets destroying SBS Arabic news, to see if there were social media presence and stage rallies sis in Syria. Since fighting broke out neighbouring areas. She is reduced to any new developments in Syria. in support of their respective causes. between government and rebel forces tears by a maternal concern, and I’m The top story that day was on In part, these efforts are designed – in March 2011, over 100 000 Syrians reminded of my Greek grandmother: Dubai. according to an activist I spoke with have been killed and at least two mil- she never taught him to cook, and she *** – to “show unity and solidarity with lion made refugees. In a conflict of worries about what he eats without her The Syrian Australian community the Syrian people.” However, these this scale, stories like those above are there to look after him. is small, but growing. At the time of groups are also entering into the pub- devastatingly common. K had left Syria in the 80s for the the 2011 census, 8 392 Australians lic relations war, attempting to influ- An additional factor unites the West; however, Syria was “thriving”, were Syrian-born. Since the conflict ence public opinion and potentially accounts given above: they are and she returned in the 90s as there began, thousands of Syrians have fled foreign policy by pushing their com- accounts narrated by people living were “lots of imports and exports”, to Australia using dual citizenship, peting narratives of the Syrian con- inside Australia. This is remarkable “amazing restaurants”, “culture”, and family support, or a rare refugee visa. flict. given the distances at play: Damascus “banks from four or five countries”. Many of these new migrants con- The website of the pro-rebel Aus- is burning 14 100km away. And although anti-Assad expats I sider themselves lucky: in Australia tralian Syrian Association describes But wars are rarely limited to the spoke to countered that most of these they are safe. Yet in many ways they the conflict as the “struggle of the countries in which they are fought. benefits were concentrated amongst are anything but fortunate. Separated Syrian people for their freedom and For many Australians, this conflict the rich, all were horrified by the from their families and friends, they democracy” from President Bashar has hit much closer to home. Indeed, destructiveness of the war. receive only intermittent news about Al-Assad. The Hands Off Syria mem- a number of Australians have become Pro-government newspaper Al- what is happening back home. bers I spoke with countered that the involved in the conflict, some leaving Watan recently estimated that wide Some Australians have taken a rebels were increasingly dominated by for Syria to fight or deliver humanitar- scale bombings had already destroyed more active stance, joining groups mercenaries and radical jihadists. ian aid, others working here as activ- over USD$ 1.5 trillion worth of infra- like the anti-Assad Australian Syrian There is some truth in both ists. And many Syrian Australians, structure and buildings. Sanctions Association or the pro-government accounts. The defence of Assad particularly those who fled here to imposed by – amongst others – the ‘Hands Off Syria’. These groups made to me by one pro-government escape the war, anxiously collect any Arab League, the EU, the US, and Aus- fundraise for humanitarian aid, using activist – that “nobody is perfect” – news of their families. tralia has crippled trade in the region. contacts to smuggle basics like for- seemed unforgivably glib in the light K, a Syrian expat in her mid 70s, During fighting, landmarks that have mula milk, flour, rice and sugar into of UN confirmation that his govern- fled Syria for Australia last year. Her existed for centuries, even millennia, Syria via Turkey. ment is responsible for recent chemi- have been razed in hours. cal weapon attacks in Damascus; the

Photo: James Lawler Duggan

12 The man who planted a rainforest in his front garden (1991) Excuse us while we retch - What about campus food then? (1979) www.honisoit.com feature

Alex Downie investigates the impact of the Syria conflict – there and in Australia

Sarin gas that was used is 26 times lian Syrian Association tells me of the seas to fight in the revolution. face federal charges under the Crimes as deadly as cyanide. At the same 23 threats left on his mobile phone. Three weeks ago, a Queenslander (Foreign Incursion and Recruitment) Act, time, the rebels have radicalised at an “Assad is better than you and all the blew himself up in a truck outside which carries a 20-year maximum alarming rate, undermining claims by Sunnis we know,” he recalls. a Syrian military airport. ‘Australia’s prison term. However the act is rarely anti-Assad activists that extreme ele- That same leader then claimed that first suicide bomber’ was a married 27 used in practice. Irvine, however, was ments exist only on the fringe. British as their beliefs were heretical, Alawites year old, rumoured to be of Lebanese more concerned that these young Aus- defence consultancy IHS Jane recently such as Assad “are not Muslims”, he heritage. He acted on behalf of the tralians could “become quite severely estimated that almost half of the 100 states. This is one of many traditional Al-Nusrah Front, a blacklisted rebel radicalised.” 000 rebels fighting in Syria are jihad- insults levelled against Alawites. group affiliated with Al Qaeda. It is estimated that a ninth of West- ists or hardliner Islamists, with 10 000 Most worryingly, this sectarian This bomber is not the only Austra- erners who had fought or trained in fighting for factions linked with al- divide has escalated with assaults, lian to have travelled overseas to join overseas jihadist insurgencies ulti- Qaeda. arsons and even shootings. In Novem- the fight. ASIO chief David Irvine mately became involved in anti-West- Perhaps most striking is the con- ber 2012, armed men chased the Ala- has revealed that six Australians have ern terrorist plots. If true, a small flict’s increasing sectarianism. William wite owner of a shop in Thomastown, been killed in combat against the proportion of Australians returning McCants, a fellow at the Brookings Victoria, shouting “we’re going to Assad regime, and authorities believe from fighting in Syria will no doubt be Saban Center, writes that although the shut you down, you Alawite dog.” A there are about 80 Australians partici- targeted as a security risk. civil war “did not start out as a sec- car displaying the emblem of the Free pating in the conflict in either combat *** tarian conflict” in 2011, the divided Syrian Army was twice firebombed. or support roles, although some esti- I spoke with an anti-Assad Sunni became entrenched as the “conflict Jamal Daoud, an outspoken opponent mates range upwards of 200. grandfather. He had immigrated to turned violent.” To generalise, Syrians of the rebels, was punched in front of Most of the fighters who take this Australia in the 1960s. He didn’t have in the Sunni Muslim majority tend to Today Tonight’s cameras. While some pilgrimage are young, ideological, and time for much of the “nonsense” that identify with the rebels, whilst most of the reported attacks have targeted often marginalised in broader society. the activists in Australia got up to. The minorities – Christians, Assyrians, pro-rebel activists, most have been Most of these men support the reb- fighters who left Australia to fight in Armenians, Druze, and the Alawi- directed against government loyalists. els, although it is also believed there Syria disgust him. tes, to which the Assad family belong For targets of this violence, Syd- are some Australian Shiite volunteers – typically remain loyal to the Assad “Stupid extremists” and “filthy bas- ney’s suburbs have split along sectar- fighting with Hezbollah militants for tards,” he remarks. regime. ian lines. As I speak to more people, the Assad regime. Do the activist groups in Australia The old man reminisces on decade I learn that activists feel unsafe walk- The majority of these fighters are long friendships with Christian pro- mirror this divide? Hands off Syria ing through neighbourhoods around born in Australia, and come from argues that their membership doesn’t regime friends that had disintegrated Sydney. Prominent pro-government families with strong ties in the north as they argued over the conflict. fall along sectarian lines. Indeed, many activists avoid Sunni-dominated parts of Lebanon – many, like the suicide Australian activists have no family ties Before the war begun, they had been of Lakemba, Auburn and Bankstown, bomber, are Lebanese dual citizens. “as close as brothers.” to the region. Hands Off Syria activ- while recognisable insurgency sup- David Malet, a lecturer in Interna- ists estimate that only half of their porters are weary of travelling into There was one thing the man – tional Relations from Melbourne and many others I had spoken to – Australian members are even of Mid- Shia enclaves in areas such as Arn- University, writes: “most likely, the dle Eastern heritage. cliffe, Rockdale and Belfield. emphasised, something that united particular ties of the Australian Leba- both sides of the conflict: “At the end However, while advocates from *** nese community with its connections both sides in Australia care deeply of the day, both sides realise that they The Syrian conflict has intensified in the region facilitate easy access into want peace.” about the wellbeing of all Syrians, violence within Australia, but some Syria and give Australia its dispropor- sectarian undertones also pervade the Australians have also contributed to tionate presence in this conflict.” activist scene. A leader of the Austra- the violence in Syria, travelling over- When fighters return, they could

Indeed, my weekday interview with K ended exactly at noon, when she abruptly left the room we’d been talking in. Her sister explained that she had gone to a back room to watch the SBS Arabic news, to see if there were any new developments in Syria. The top story that day was on Dubai.

Excuse us while we retch - What about campus food then? (1979) 13 ARTS & CULTURE Take a walk on the wild side Andre Fenby writes about his trip to a Bolivian animal refuge

For Western backpackers accus- walk out to Koru’s cage with my co- bolted from the bushes with intense ously”. “[Over the past year or so] we tomed to the steadfast regulations of handler, Camila. After clipping two thick speed and purpose. I jolted forward as have formalised our emergency proce- their home countries, the reality of leads onto his collar, the three of us would he hit the end of his line, about a meter dures, protocols and requirements,” says Parque Ambue Ari in Bolivia can be walk a busy, mosquito-ridden jungle trail. from Camila. Jesshope. “If we deem that the risk to a hard to believe. There, Koru would watch capuchins leap But, aside from one (terrifying) warn- volunteer becomes too high … then will But the closer one gets, the more dramatically from tree to tree, drag us in ing bite as I fumbled to unclip him for stop that activity – e.g. it will become a word-of-mouth testaments and faded vain pursuit of scampering jungle ani- his dinner one afternoon, Koru never non-contact cat.” hostel flyers confirm that some 348km mals, or simply tear the surrounding flora touched me in aggression. Surprisingly, In an era characterised by what the north of Santa Cruz is an animal ref- to shreds. one of the few incidents that occurred World Wide Fund for Nature calls an uge where volunteers ‘walk’ jaguars, The prospect of being ‘jumped’ by during my time involved Nicole’s puma, “unprecedented spike” in the global pumas and ocelots, no qualifications overexcited cats was part of the job for Leo, who had become agitated after too illegal wildlife trade, it’s clear South necessary. many volunteers, especially when it came many changes in his routine. America’s poorest country depends on “I got hooked,” says Christian, a to Rupi, a large and boisterous jaguar “I have no idea how it was considered CIWY, which receives no government 21-year-old North American volunteer known to knock people to the ground on to be alright for [two] females, one with support. And, while the Bolivian gov- who ended up staying 14 months and a regular basis. limited experience and the other with ernment has signalled it wants to stop working with every cat in the park. “We did some training and were giving no experience, to be out on their own Ambue Ari from letting inexperienced “You can't do that anywhere else in a few points to watch out for,” says Mar- walking one of the biggest pumas in the volunteers ‘walk’ unpredictable jungle the world for that cheap … it was defi- tin, 30, the Irish backpacker once charged park who is known to 'jump' its carers,” animals, it remains to be seen whether nitely a crazy experience.” with escorting Rupi through the rain- says Jesse, 27, who walked away from this will come to fruition. AnonymousAmbue Ari waswrites set aboutup in 2002 their bybad the trip forest. “But nothing prepares you for a the incident with puncture wounds up For now, Ambue Ari continues to NGO Communidad Inti Wara Yassi 9-foot, 180kg [sic] beast coming at you.” her forearm. “It was completely irre- provide both its volunteers and its cats a (CIWY) with the support of British While restraining a jaguar as powerful sponsible.” rehabilitation program only a place like gap year organisation Quest Overseas. and strong-willed as Rupi – who “escaped” After being treated by the resident vet Bolivia can offer. To work with one of its 26 jungle cats his cage more than once, according to – the nearest hospital is 48km from the – typically abandoned or seized from Christian – isn’t a realistic option, we park – Jesse stopped working with Leo. illegal traffickers – volunteers need were instructed to be extra cautious with Despite her criticisms, she maintains she only commit to a 30-day minimum and Koru. Amorphous rumours about Koru had a “a great time” and enjoyed expe- pay 3400 bolivianos (around AU$17). taking a chunk out of an ex-volunteer’s riencing something “almost unfathom- That’s not to say it’s an easy ride; some- leg circulated the park, although that was able to my friends and family in Aus.” thing my girlfriend Nicole and I found surely an exaggeration. Surely. Indeed, Australia is predictably out when we decided to volunteer after One day in particular involved a few strict in this regard. The Standards for hearing about the program in Argen- close calls. Koru first darted into the Exhibiting Carnivores in NSW at tina. patuju (a native flower) then leapt out least demand “adequately trained” The park has no phone, internet at me for a narrowly avoided waist-high persons handle such animals, a or electricity. Volunteers sleep on tackle, and later bolted up a tree for an luxury Ambue Ari can’t afford hay mattresses and work 6 ½ aerial attack, only to jump down sheep- any more than the Bolivian days a week in tropical ishly upon realising we were out of range. government can currently heat, tormented by Then, wising up, he walked slowly into hungry mos- the scrub to one of his resting spots. quitoes. Camila couldn't see him and asked me what he was doing. ''Nothing,'' I said. ''He's just sort of … staring at you.'' Of T h e course, the day after we arrived, we were each assigned a puma: I was to look after a young, energetic cat named Koru, while enforce. Nicole would take Leo, an older animal But Fundraiser and known for keeping handlers out in the Administrator of CIWY Emily jungle until after sundown. moment Jesshope says Ambue Ari takes Image: Bryant Apolonio Every day except Sunday, I would I said that Koru volunteer safety “extremely seri- and Lucy Watson www.honisoit.com culture

The festival of fire Stella Ktenas falls down, down, down into the Burning Seed A right turn past the umpteenth Woman: a giant wooden effigy to be ings. I have many a fond memory from workshop, experienced outdoor cinema, paddock of Patterson’s Curse and we burnt at the end of the festival. She was Trash Mansion, from life drawing male and fell silent in awe of a shooting star. glimpsed, in the distance, carnival tents immense, she was radiant, the first ever models to dancing and hula hooping Saturday evening was THE NIGHT: the in a thicket of trees. There is nothing female effigy featured at a Burning event. the night away, to my special experience one you had been daily siesta-ing for, the else out here in Matong State Forest. A space was found next to the Red Earth as one of the 20 Burners out of 1000s one where you knew you would not stop “This must be the place.” The man at Brewery, our tents were mounted, and provided with a tasting of the magical till well after dawn. Gathered around the entrance to our Never, Neverland we installed our own dome to rival one fruit. We sat cross-legged like 6 year olds at a safe distance from the Woman we takes our tickets and asks us to exit the 50 meters up from us. Walking around, – interesting angles were observed of marveled at the fire jugglers, and then vehicle and step through the ‘Welcome people were at ease to smile, make eye the nude gentleman of the party – and fell collectively into raptures when the Home’ door quaintly attached to a contact and engage in small talk. This were gifted a tablet of concentrated Syn- pyrotechnicians set her aflame, her single wall out here in the middle of talk, though small, was a big leap from sepalum dulcificum, a berry which causes arms, breasts, and skirt. Burning bright, nowhere. I was 'Home'. Sydney life where the person sitting next sour foods to taste sweet. We were tak- the sky heavy with ash, she then fell and Burning Seed, the Australian version to you on the bus callously pretends ing shots of vinegar, and ravenously a rupture of celebratory noise exploded of the American lifestyle and art festi- you don’t exist despite the blood pour- devouring grapefruit, lime, and lemons, into the night, just in time for the nudity. val Burning Man, was a week of blissful ing from the gash on your arm acquired as if famine had struck. Following tradition we and the nudists whimsy, sumptuous light displays, nos- when trying to climb over them into the Burning Seed runs on the philosophy walked, or dangerously danced, a revo- talgic sounds, and majestic sculptures. vacant window seat. Meeting new people, of gifting. I was freely gifted luxurious lution around her burning embers. The Burning Man runs on ten principles: learning of their stories, growing to care soy lattés each breakfast from a Nowra night was a blur of dancing, lights, and Gifting, Decommodification, Radical- for them – this was idyllic. couple, free gin & tonics all day at the elation. The day after, I approached the inclusion, Radical Self-reliance, Radi- Across the festival grounds were Mint Country Club, and endless whisky Woman’s remains and collected a hand- cal self-expression, Communal Effort, themed camps: scattered oases offering shots at The Loco Saloon as my friends ful of her ashes. Such a grand, imposing Civic Responsibility, Leave No Trace, workshops, music, activities, and bev- lost at Black Jack. This gifting was quite figure now reduced to a pile of grey. I Participation, and Immediacy. These erage. One of the best was the Trash the curiosity. When I wasn’t busy receiv- was humbled. principles penned by the Founder Larry Mansion camp which was furnished ing gifts I contributed words to the I was still not ready to leave this land Harvey in 2004 are to be abided by as as a derelict mansion and featured two Wooden Temple, built to pay respect and of nymphs and dreams, but an overdue all attendees attempt to live as a loving luxuriously decorated bars with skull to be burnt in silence. I also experienced essay brought me back. and functioning community for a week. shaped beer tap handles, as well as a a rebirth travelling through the wooden Soon after entering, we passed the stage, lounges, chandeliers, and paint- vagina sculpture. I attended a knot-tying

Photography: Stella Ktenas

The bad dog and the angel custodio 15 culture @honi_soit The fun police FIRST PERSON Daniel Swain asks whether order is being maintained, or defined The first time I was stopped by police consider my first mugging to be a more I was drunk and alone, walking through personal encounter. After a brief nego- the backstreets of Darlinghurst early tiation, the mugger let me keep my cards Saturday morning. They suspected that and phone. I noted that my wallet was I was trying to buy drugs. I suppose vegan leather, he laughed. He apolo- that walking through the backstreets of gised. Darlinghurst, drunk and alone at 2 a.m. In both cases I was targeted because I is plausibly the behaviour of someone was alone and drunk in the city at night trying to buy drugs. But it is also plausi- but only in one case was that treated bly the behaviour of me, walking home, like it was perverse. And this isn’t police drunk and alone through the backstreets misconduct; it is the conduct of mod- of Darlinghurst early on a Saturday ern policing. Whether it’s a music fes- morning. It was this troubling ambiguity tival or Mardi Gras, or just a Saturday that the Officers were keen to resolve. night in Sydney, police officers remind They told me the time. They noted the young people to enjoy themselves un- location. They asked me if I was intoxi- suspiciously. We get searched, sniffed cated. They asked me if I was by myself. by dogs, and asked to count our drinks. I nodded at them and they nodded at Stopped, questioned, and moved along. each other. Although our nodding im- For some of us, myself included, these plied that we had now reached a com- awkward, humiliating interactions will mon understanding of our situation, I stop when we get older. For less privi- was then asked to repeat these answers leged communities, over-policing will several times. They asked and I an- always be a part of their lives. A redistri- swered, and we shared in an optimistic bution occurs: some people are made to conspiracy that repetition might sponta- feel less safe so that others can feel more neously transform facts into interpreta- safe. In order to prevent graffiti on shop tion. We were like fact alchemists. windows, young people are interrogated A new tack was taken: they asked me Cartoon: Bryant Apolonio for merely having cans of spray paint in why I here, now, drunk and alone. It “Hold on... is it vegan?” their backpacks. is always difficult to give a considered to look them in the eyes, to not roll my in similar circumstances and I have not Obviously, there is a value to some account of the choices we mundanely eyes. Eventually, I must have struck the been stopped. I still can’t discern when police presence but it is important to make to be in particular places, at par- right balance of indignation and com- I’m moving through the city suspicious- compare it to the collected minor in- ticular times, doing particular things but pliance. All five of the officers escorted ly. dignities it causes. ‘More police’ can’t it is obviously most difficult when its me to get a cab on Oxford St, like my Of course, the police are interested in be the easy, lazy answer to any risk, to late, and you’re drunk, and lost and tired personal security detail. maintaining public safety. I’m a gay man every risk. From my perspective, that is and alone. It lasted about twenty minutes. No ar- so perhaps it was stupid for me to be more threatening than any pill I could I was told to stand up straight, to stand rest, no charge. Since then, I have been walking around deserted streets by my- have bought from the non-existent drug against a wall, to walk in a straight line, stopped on other occasions in similar self. Arguably, the police were protect- dealer I wasn’t going to meet. to answer clearly, to not answer back, circumstances. Since then, I have been ing me. But I didn’t feel protected. I CHARACTERS WHO NEED TO DIE TOP 5 Shannen Potter gives you her hit list Carl Grimes Carl is a kid, and no one wants to say, “hey, I want that kid to die.” Except me. I definitely want that kid to die. He’s spent 5 the series alternately being a nuisance to the group and playing cold blooded killer. Even his own parents never seemed to like him all that much, so why should we?

The Woodbury Survivors 4 These guys are basically cannon fodder. We don’t have to get to know them, which means we can enjoy their gruesome deaths guilt free. Think intestines getting ripped out and faces getting eaten. I mean we watch the show primarily to see people die horribly right? Please tell me I’m not alone here. Carol Peletier A while ago I could have put Carol on this list for being extremely useless and boring. She’s really developed as a 3 character lately, however, and this will be her undoing. This show loves to kill characters off as soon as they start doing something interesting, and Carol’s secret knife lessons with the kids are damn interesting.

Hershel Greene What’s the deal with Hershel? He positions himself as a Dale-like moral centre to the group, but a) he doesn’t even have 2 a bucket hat, and b) no one cares what he has to say. In my house, when we think someone’s about to die we say, “he’s gonna get it!” and I’ve just started doing that every time Hershel is on screen, hoping I can will it to happen.

Rick Grimes I can hear you saying, “But Rick is the main character of the show! He’s the hero!” But that’s exactly why he needs to die. 1 If Rick is gone we’re going to see competition for leadership of the group and a massive shift in the group’s dynamics. Plus, we won’t have to look at his weird face all the time – why is he always so sweaty?

16 Democracy was always a stupid idea (1990) www.honisoit.com feature TEARING DOWN THE WALLS

Our prisons punish the disadvantaged, fail to rehabiliate inmates, and should be abolished, writes Tom Raue William Bugmy is an Aboriginal man there in the head. They should have Schumer received at least $100 000 from society and concentration of criminals who has spent most of his life in prison. been given other alternatives, other the prison lobby in 2012. He is chair of together provide an unsafe environment Growing up in rural NSW, he witnessed rehabilitation possibilities. Instead they the Rules Committee, chair of the Sub- for prisoners to learn. his father stab his mother fifteen times, were given 12 months to think about committee on Immigration and Border Reform measures are worth taking, and never learned to read or write. He it with a pack of animals” Prison does Enforcement, member of the Subcom- but will not fix the fundamental prob- has committed various offences, most not teach prisoners to behave, it teaches mittee on Crime and Drugs, and Sub- lem that our criminal justice system is recently an assault on a prison guard. A them how to be criminals. In England, committee on Administrative Oversight backwards. Instead of locking people recent High Court decision found that some prisons have a reoffending rate of and the Courts. up once they have done something, we the disadvantages of his background 70%. Over half of Australian prisoners In Australia, Serco for example should focus money and attention on should be given full weight at every sen- have served a previous sentence. employs a team of paid lobbyists and fixing the root causes of crime. It costs tencing. A series of prison terms have Almost a quarter of prisoners are donates money to both the Liberals and an average of $75 000 a year to keep only had a negative impact of Bugmy’s of Aboriginal or Torres Strait Islander Labor. Serco runs three regular prisons somebody in prison. If that money were already difficult life. descent. An Indigenous person is 15 and nine detention centres including spent on schools, welfare, and provid- Imprisonment is the main tool of our times more likely to go to prison than Christmas Island. ing jobs then the conditions which cre- criminal justice system, but prisons are a non-Indigenous person. They are These donations encourage policy ate crime would be minimized and we ineffective at reducing crime. Prisons especially prone to abuse or neglect by makers to introduce mandatory deten- would have no need for prisons. Simply target the poor, create re-offenders, and guards and police causing deaths in cus- tion for asylum seekers and to enforce legalizing and regulating currently illicit serve the interests of big business. Pris- tody. Most prisoners come from similar drug prohibition. It encourages gov- drugs would take thousands of people ons should be abolished. backgrounds: low socioeconomic status ernment spokespeople to foster a false out of the criminal justice system so that *** and poor education. public belief that prisons are a solu- we could instead provide treatment and Prisons are meant to serve as a deter- When poor families have their bread- tion to the problems of crime. In real- rehabilitation. rent and are thus intentionally terrifying. winners taken away, they are plunged ity, the prison-industrial complex works *** Inmates live in fear of guards and other further into poverty. Upon release, a precisely because it doesn’t provide a A focus on social programs and prisoners. David*, who has served sen- criminal is barred from many profes- solution - profit is made by increasing wealth redistribution would prevent tences in NSW and ACT commented sions and will be generally discriminated crime and incarceration. Unfortunately, many crimes, and a system focused on that guards turned a blind eye to pris- against. With few job prospects and lobbying works – the US now imprisons rehabilitation rather than punishment oner violence: “There would be a lot of new criminal contacts gained in prison, a higher proportion of its own citizens would prevent minor criminals becom- incidents of people banging their heads it is inevitable that many former inmates than any other country. ing serious ones. However, when it on the toiled bowl, for example, or slip- turn to crime and thus a permanent *** comes to very serious crimes, it is hard criminal underclass is created by the ping down the stairs, you know what I Reforms can be made like ending pri- to see alternatives to a prison system. prison system. mean?” vatisation and focusing on rehabilitation Educating people about respect and Female prisoners are prone to sexual *** instead of retribution. Rather than being consent is a better approach to rape abuse, at a rate five times higher than an instrument for revenge, prisons prevention than punishment after the male prisoners. Prisoners have little Almost a quarter would be better off focusing on reform- fact, but some people will never get the access to their friends, families, educa- ing inmates. Trade apprenticeships, message. Most murderers can be reha- tion or recreation. Almost half of all of prisoners are of counseling, and drug rehabilitation pro- bilitated, but there are rare serial kill- deaths in prison are suicides. Aboriginal or Torres Strait grams go some way towards reducing ers who will always commit violence if Despite brutal conditions, evidence Islander descent. An the rate of reoffending, turning other- they are left to their own devices. David shows that severity of sentences and wise hopeless people into productive stresses that prisons do more harm than conditions in prison have no deterrent Indigenous person is members of society. A good example of good for most prisoners, but that there effect. Tom Bathurst, Chief Justice of 15 times more likely to this new style of prison is Bastoy Island are some “career criminals” who are the NSW Supreme Court, says that there go to prison than a non- in Norway, where even murderers live “unimaginable in society”. is no persuasive evidence that deter- with minimum security, learn trades Unfortunately some form of deten- rence works for the majority of crimes. Indigenous person. and have ample leisure time. The rate tion will always be necessary for the CHARACTERS WHO NEED TO DIE Bathurst claims that the idea that crimi- of recidivism is only 30%, compared to extremely dangerous, but it should be a nals conduct “a rational assessment of Australia is increasingly following the 43.7% in Australia. The prison reform last resort, and it does not need to be their planned illegal behaviour’’ bears American trend of privatising prisons. movement has done good work in shift- cruel. Many facilities in Australia are run by ing the focus of prisons away from sim- ‘’little resemblance to reality’’. *** corporations like Serco, G4S, and GEO ple punishment. Nobody commits a crime like drug For the overwhelming majority of Group. I spoke to Brett Collins, coordinator dealing, theft, rape or even murder, if crimes, prison is a waste of money. Even Higher prison counts and tougher sen- of Justice Action, an Australian prisoner they think they will go to prison. Since a reform-focused prison is destructive, tences do not provide a deterrent effect advocacy group. Collins was previously they do not think they will be punished breaking up families and communities to crime, as statistics attest. The prison an inmate himself, having first gone to at all, the threat of long sentences is no and creating criminal networks on the lobby is aware of this, but their ultimate prison at age seventeen, and later serv- deterrent. inside. Tough prison sentences are inef- goal is profit, not the public good. High ing ten years out of a seventeen year A higher proportion of the world’s fective at reducing crime, but the prison- inmate counts are good business for pri- sentence. He then gained an Arts degree population is in prison than at any point industrial complex is geared towards vate security companies, and there is an in Law and Economics from the Univer- in history. In June 2012 there were failed policy. We should spend less incentive for those companies to lobby sity of Queensland and a postgraduate 29,383 prisoners in Australia, costing on policing, trialing, stigmatising and and influence government policy. diploma in Criminology at USYD. He the government $3 billion a year, not imprisoning poor people. We should describes the prison system as “unfair, counting asylum seekers held in deten- This influence of private security com- redirect our resources into directly pre- unreasonable and counterproductive”. tion centres. panies on public policy is often called venting poverty, giving opportunities the prison-industrial complex. Lobby- His organisation seeks to improve the Prisoners are isolated from the outside for criminals to reform, and educat- ing in the US is far more brazen than in lives of prisoners through relentless lob- world, have their incomes cut off, and ing people about sexism, homophobia Australia, but the pattern is the same. In bying. Despite the short term victories then are released into society again with and racism. With the prison population the US, lobby groups funded by security that Justice Action has won, the ultimate new criminal contacts. A major prob- increasing by 4% a year, we are running corporations make private donations goal is not simple reform but the aboli- lem according to David is that minor out of time. to key figures from both the Democrat tion of the penal system as we know it. offenders are lumped in with dangerous and Republican parties. Senators and *** ones. “Many people that are in prison congress-people who sit on committees should not be there. I was there with Rehabilitating criminals is difficult related to immigration and law enforce- *Names have been changed to preserve ano- a lot of people who were in for drink in a prison environment. The power ment are specifically targeted. For nymity driving and minor charges, you know? imbalance between guards and inmates example, New York Democrat Chuck Just repeat offenders that were not all lends itself to abuse. The isolation from

A toast and vegemite issue (2010) 17 opinion @honi_soit competition

Congratulations to the top 3 entries in the 2013 Honi Soit Opinion Competition, judged by ‘Comment is Free’ editor for the Guardian Australia, Jessica Reed! The Great American novelist EQUAL FIRST Grace Lin asks when women’s writing will be considered literature rather than ‘chic lit’

The decline of literature others’ definitions.” Seen as has been a long time com- a doughy, undifferentiated ing. In an excerpt from mass of melodrama unde- his forthcoming book, serving of acclaim, litera- Jonathan Franzen rallies ture by women is still largely against the intellectual read with the preconcep- poverty that characterises tions that authors like Fran- our “media-saturated” zen have. world. The past couple And female writers contin- of months saw a number ue to face an uphill journey of think pieces in pub- in escaping the dominion lications such as Salon white, male writers yield. and NYT, comparing lit- VIDA, an organisation ded- erature to a stagnant echo icated to women in literary chamber replete with cli- arts, compiled a statistical chés. Mark Edmundson’s rundown in 2012 with un- Poetry Slam article in the surprising results. Nearly July issue of Harper’s de- three-fourths of authors rides modern poetry as reviewed in the well-known weak and feeble. publications it analysed were The undercurrent of men. It seems like women chauvinism in Edmund- are stuck between a rock son’s piece is obvious. and a hard place. You’re Instead of being “soft” only allowed to choose one and “lovely,” poetry or the other: wealth like Jodi should reach for “convic- Piccoult or critical acclaim tion” and “risk.” Franzen Now I know some of you will agree with Hitchens that women are about as funny as oesophagal cancer... like Franzen. once again expressed his I enjoyed reading Infinite Jest distaste for the insipid- and I don’t think Franzen’s ity of women’s work by growing up and reading a litany of white ingness of the public to indulge young proclaiming that the downfall of Alice male authors such as Saul Bellow, John men with no direction as poetic souls Take a look at any women’s Munro’s work is the pathological sen- Updike and Martin Amis, “everybody’s and creative contrarians is not interest- literature section and it timentality she has for her characters. neutral unless they’re black. I just want- ing to me. Fitzgerald ‘borrowed’ exten- And in an odd non sequitur on Char- ed to try and create perhaps a sense of sively from his wife’s diaries for mate- becomes clear that women lie Rose, David Foster Wallace rallied alienation and otherness in this person, rial while simultaneously discouraging are not afforded the luxury of behind the practice of writing long- the white reader, to remind them that her from publishing, lest she encroach obliviousness. winded books against feminists, who, they are not neutral to other people.” upon his success. Gregory Corso, a according to him, constantly complain Works like Huckleberry Finn and Moby writer in the inner circle of the Beat that a white male will “sit down and Dick are revered stories for all genders. Generation, stated that women did ex- work is without merit. But rather than write this enormous book and impose But asking boys to read novels from the ist in the movement with the caveat that offering accurate analyses on the state his phallus on the consciousness of the likes of Austen, Woolf and Plath? No “if you were male you could rebel, but of literature, I see the tugged collars of world.” chance. if you were female your families had writers’ shirts who feel that the white, But Wallace’s position is deceptive be- you locked up.” male voice as a neutral voice for all is cause this is exactly what white, male “the woman who writes is a Take a look at any women’s literature crumbling due to incursions from au- writers take advantage of. I don’t think thors they deem below them. By be- writer by her own definition, section and it becomes clear that wom- it’s a controversial position to claim en are not afforded the luxury of obliv- ing destined for posterity regardless that women are required to recognise but a woman writer by iousness. Even though female authors of merit, it’s understandable that these male consciousness in a way men are others’ definitions” write about the same things as male au- men feel threatened by the likes of ac- not required to understand female con- thors – grand public subjects as well as claimed authors such as Chimamanda sciousness. Films with female leads are the intricacies of intimate life – and just Ngozi Adichie, who herself states that considered ‘chick flicks,’ whereas films So, what next? The solution is ap- as compellingly, books about women’s we do a “greater disservice to girls be- with male characters are considered parently to return to the yesteryear of lives and by women struggle to enter the cause we raise them to cater to the frag- relatable because they are framed as literature, the days of unadulterated echelons of top-tier literature by virtue ile egos of men.” I just didn’t expect stories about humans. Also contem- wisdom and passion from the likes of of being characterised ‘for women.’ As their critiques to be so petulant. plate Zadie Smith’s deliberate decision Fitzgerald and Kerouac: the musings of Joyce Carole Oates once lamented, “the to only mention the race of characters tortured geniuses who encapsulated the woman who writes is a writer by her Cartoon: Nina Ubaldi in her novel NW if they are white. By heart of American identity. But the will- own definition, but a woman writer by

18 Culumo fabulous (1991) www.honisoit.com opinion competition Chasing Enlightenment and EQUAL FIRST Inevitable Disappointment Milly Ellen advocates travel without Instagram There exists amongst us an idea that to find a destination and formulate an inevitable disappointment her charac- postcard-esque shots that do not neces- to be ‘worldly’ is to be wise. This belief itinerary in an instant. ters face in the presence of natural and sary reflect our true experiences as well as is especially prevalent amongst the Fast-forward to the moment when historical wonders. We may wander gushing status updates that convey only hordes of students who flock to the you land in your exotic destination of through the Vatican City and marvel at superficial snapshots of a foreign - desti far reaches of Europe in search of his- choice - quick shot of arrivals sign. The golden pillars and artistic genius, but nation, we are deceiving our friends and torical enlightenment, South-East Asia moment you get into a taxi - quick shot how many of us take sneaky pictures family and inciting artificial jealously. in search of holistic drunkenness and of stunning architecture or decrepit in the hopes that it will receive ‘likes’ And in reality, we are deceiving our- America in search of every cliché imagi- slums (depending on your location). and ‘retweets’? To what extent do we selves. By convincing yourself that by fol- nable. When the intrepid adventurers The moment you arrive at your accom- actually appreciate what we’re in the lowing the well-trodden paths of Lonely eventually return, tanned and glowing, modation - quick shot out the window presence of? It would seem that we are Planet expertise you will somehow ‘see’ a it is expected that you will listen to their with obligatory hashtags: #thisisthelyf, more concerned with how our trip will culture, ‘understand’ a nation and reach tales of adventure and self-fulfillment. #sunset #paradise. With such instanta- be perceived as compared to our actual the effervescent heights of travel nirvana The people they met who changed their neous access to social media and the bar- experiences. – complete disappointment and bitterness worldview and the splendorous sites rage of travel-boasting that seems a rite It is obvious to think of corrupt can only follow. they saw are both effusively detailed of passage for some, it is impossible to governments, dodgy private enter- By being honest about our experi- with such grandeur, you wonder why ignore these self-obsessed submissions. prises and greedy individuals as being ences, we can perhaps lower expectations your holidays abroad appear so dull in It is not ‘sharing’. It serves as a means by the most deceptive amongst us. But of ‘enlightening trips’ that are generally comparison. which the person validates their $1 500 shouldn’t we acknowledge the fact doomed to fail. By disregarding the com- This is the inherent deception of airfare, jetlag and quiet disappointment. that in the ever competitive world pulsion to share the intimate details of travelling. With the commercializa- By documenting each moment of our of social media, we have become what we ate from a fabulous street stall, tion of travel across the globe as well travels, to be immediately posted online attuned to synthesizing our lives? We what we saw at some historically signifi- as increasingly affordable airfares, the for approval by our peers, we are dimin- are being forced into a farcical online cant ruins or what we heard at a local bar, once elusive gimmick of baking on the ishing the tangible experience to a series lie, and this deception seems most vis- perhaps we can actually appreciate the beaches of Thailand, potent cocktail of documents and snaps. ible in our accounts of travel. As we beauty of what we’re surrounded by when in hand, is available to everyone. His- Michelle de Kretser speaks eloquently are plagued by terminal FOMO and we travel. Please, put down the phone. torically pursued on the whims of the of this phenomenon in her Miles Frank- travel inadequacy, we feel a dishon- Take a breath. Give yourself a chance to rich, with the widespread sales of Lonely lin award winning novel, Questions of est compulsion to filter our photos just ‘be’ in a place without recording it. Planet guides and seemingly obsessive Travel, as she highlights the vapidity of and correspondence. By posting only addiction to travel blogs, it is possible seeking ‘truth’ in foreign destinations and the gratuitous ‘selfies’ and well-lit, Treason d’etre THIRD PLACE Ben Brooks on the Rosenbergs, Manning and Snowden Ethel walked calmly into the room. Manning, however, was acquitted of Wales, it is treason to merely “compass She sought to embarrass that government A foul, singed odour lingered in the air. “aiding the enemy”, and Snowden is or imagine” dethroning the Sovereign. and bring its agencies into disrepute. And She took a seat at the front of the audi- unlikely to attract the same charge. So it is difficult to charge an Ameri- yet, like Snowden, she meant to improve ence, ignoring the damp outline which Yet both have been attainted for can with treason. There have been rather than diminish the quality of Ameri- marked her newly deceased husband. treason in the court of public opinion. fewer than forty prosecutions, and a can governance. Minutes later, the diminutive woman Politicians from House Speaker John mere handful of convictions. But that The US made it very clear in 1776 that strained wildly at her leather cuffs as Boehner to former Vice President Dick is precisely the point. Jefferson et al. the government is not synonymous with electricity coursed through her body. Cheney denounced the pair as traitors. understood what the modern states- the People. It follows that a betrayal of Not quite dead, the warden tried again. One Congressman anonymously edited man does not: treason is a crime apart, government is not necessarily a betrayal And again. Finally, smoke billowing Snowden’s Wikipedia page to read “trai- not a loose epithet or political foot- of the nation. Contaminating ordinary from her limp head, the prison staff let tor” rather than “dissident”. And Demo- ball. The penalties and stigma which criminal proceedings with the rhetoric the corpse down. So passed Julius and cratic senators like Dianne Feinstein accompany it should be reserved for of treason exposes undeserving citizens Ethel Rosenberg – proud parents of joined the chorus of hawks, eager to those who not only betray their coun- to gratuitously cruel punishments. Man- two, and atomic spies. prove their national security credentials. try, they wrote, but who intend to do ning’s 35-year sentence, for instance, is The Rosenberg case exemplified the The Wikileaks-cum-NSA disclosures it real harm. longer than that given to a US soldier paid McCarthy-era predilection for hyper- have been followed by wave upon wave Manning and Snowden hardly by Iraq to spy on American forces during bole. The prosecution and media called of revisionism and counter-revisionism intended to materially injure the US the Gulf War. Ethel Rosenberg merely them traitors. The trial judge agreed, as pundits indulge that quintessentially or its armed forces. They were cer- typed her husband’s notes. attributing the casualties of the Korean American pastime of ‘Traitor or Hero’? tainly reckless. Manning released files Do remember the Rosenbergs and their War to their “treason”. But the couple Dealing only in extremes, they overlook as indiscriminately as, well, an Apache 1953 execution. The casual conflation of were not convicted of treason. They some important subtleties: Manning and helicopter firing at children and Reu- “traitor” with “spy” or “criminal” is not were convicted of espionage: spiriting Snowden are not traitors as a matter ters reporters. Yet she is no Tokyo a problem unique to the digital age. It is nuclear designs to the Soviet Union – of law, or as a matter of fact. Treason Rose, Lord Haw-Haw or Anwar Al- the product of a combustible political a wartime ally – during the 1940s. The should not feature at all in the rhetorical Awlaki. A reckless traitor is not really atmosphere, and a nation that has ceded distinction is important. melting pot. a traitor. its insistence on transparency to the rapa- History forgotten is inevitably It is the sole crime outlined in the But there is a more important point cious demands of national security. repeated. Chelsea Manning was con- US Constitution. Treason, wrote the to be made. As Snowden’s father Lon- Deception, bad faith and espionage victed in July under the Espionage Act. Founding Fathers, can only consist of nie explained, “Edward... has betrayed are not the legal or moral equivalent of Like the Rosenbergs, her prosecutors levying war against the US, or aiding and his government. But I don’t believe treason. Nor should it be lazily invoked clutched at hypothetical straws to prove “adhering” to its enemies. They took a that he’s betrayed the people of the to intimidate public servants or legiti- that her leaks cost American lives. The restrictive interpretation to avoid the United States.” The same could apply mate whistleblowers. A charge of treason United States federal government is abusive, incoherent and politicised trea- to Manning, who wrote to President against Manning and Snowden can only investigating Edward Snowden for son law of the United Kingdom. There, Obama that “I only wanted to help be sustained by legal gymnastics and a similar offences. The Attorney-General for instance, it is still treason to sleep people... out of a love for my coun- pigheaded insistence on deterrence at the argues that he is a wolf in Dilbert’s with the wife of a king. Until 1998, that try”. Like Snowden, she abused the expense of justice. clothing. was punishable by death. In New South trust placed in her by the government.

Cannabis capers (1986) 19 culture @honi_soit

CRITIQUE Matilda Surtees objects to sexism in electronic music “I’m tired of creeps on message performs as Sydney artist Moon Holi- with a single adjective – and yes, that taste”. boards discussing whether or not day, there is “a tiny representation of adjective was ‘hot’. Tim Newman, also of record label they’d ‘fuck’ me,” wrote electronic art- female artists, if any at all” on local Ward notes how “lazy words like The Finer Things, explains that “it’s ist Grimes on her personal blog earlier electronic labels. Women are an esti- ‘songstress’ and ‘siren’ get thrown not us saying no to female produc- this year. mated 7% of Ableton users, a software around” to describe her as an artist, ers and artists”. Instead, he describes Despite her incredible success, used to make electronic music. Holly and how otherwise different artists are “a lack of artists who align to what it Grimes has been frequently forced to Friedlander Liddicoat, who runs music ‘lumped’ together “for no apparent rea- is that we want to do.” This gestures grapple with objectification, harassment blog East to West describes the elec- son other than gender”. This dismissive toward the more insidious causes of and molestation. She also describes tronic scene as “a boys club.” Female categorisation reflects a wider tendency under-representation, such as the dis- men making constant offers of ‘help’, artists are often sexualised and relent- to trivialise or patronise female artists. comfort and apprehension of women lessly gendered: their talent is forced treating her success as an ‘accident’, and Electronic music is a technical entering a field largely empty of female medium, and technical competence peers. is stereotypically gendered: little boys Both men express an optimism that get trucks and tools and little girls get this will change. Edirisinghe points out books and dolls. This can mature into that Astral People have recently added an assumption that “women wouldn’t two more women to their roster, which get a certain type of music because of he hopes “reflects the changing of the times.” Friedlander Liddicoat addresses Beginning with “so, you’re the issue more directly, acknowledging really hot,” the interview that “there is definitely some misogyny in the [boys’] club.” “But,” she adds, finished by describing her “these gendered ideas are easily broken debut release with a single and breaking down.” adjective – and yes, that Criticising marginalisation does not Grimes performing at Øya Festival this year. Photo: NRK P3 (Flickr) mean ignoring gender or asking women adjective was ‘hot’. to suppress their sexuality, or feminin- insinuating that her gender makes her to share space with their looks, in both conversation and the media. Clichés of ity, in order to be taken seriously and “incapable of using technology”. the technical ability involved in creating femininity colour how their music is avoid being objectified. Her sharp critique cut straight it,” says Wade Gilmour, of record label perceived and their craftsmanship char- There is a difference between an art- through denials of sexism in the indus- the Finer Things. acterised. ist choosing to incorporate sexuality try and in electronic music in particular. It’s not an inviting landscape for Producer Alison Wonderland recently into their image or music, and other The differences between how men and women. Often barren of female peers, endured an ‘interview’ which was little people imposing sexualisation upon women are marketed and received are “there is a normalcy to all-male ros- more than a catalogue of sexual remarks them. In this regard, the onus is on the not confined to one genre, or indeed ters” among both labels and audiences, dressed up as an extended joke about audience, peers, and media to not per- one industry. However, the gender dis- Friedlander Liddicoat says. Vic Ediris- the interviewer’s crush. Beginning with petuate the stereotypes and sexist lan- parity in electronic music is especially inghe, an Astral People founder, points “so, you’re really hot,” the interview guage that women in electronic music pronounced. out that male-dominated lineups are “a finished by describing her debut release are currently faced with. According to Alexandra Ward, who reflection of society and the market’s

VICTIM’S REPORT KORMA POLICE VICTIM COOKS WITH FATHER CASE NUMBER: HS2013DAD this, I suggest you use euphemisms. nothing.” “I don’t think bowl counts as an NAME: ISOBEL YEAP Let’s just call this ‘Zest Cake’. “I disagree. I think using the colander implement.” STATEMENT: The other day I was in “Cool. Okay.” would be the same as nothing. Giant “Cool. Okay.” my kitchen helping myself to a glass of “First we must grease the pan. You spaghetti strands have been known to “Now we must grate the lemon and water when my dad, who was cooking must take this baking paper and trace escape that colander. Let’s just put the orange zest for the zest cake.” At this dinner said, “Excuse me, Isobel, how around the pan using a non-toxic pen.” flour straight in.” point he handed me a large grater and I many potatoes do we have?” Usually “Is this pen toxic?” “Okay. Good executive decision! proceeded to injure myself. While you are beating the egg whites, I he would look himself, but recently “No.” “I’m bleeding everywhere.” his retina detached so currently he can will quiz you on facts about cooking. In “Cool. Okay.” “Yes, now please mix those ingredi- only see out of one eye. I went to the ents together while I lick this bowl.” potato basket and said, “We have two “Next we must beat the seven egg mini ones and two huge ones.” Then I whites. Always use a bowl that is bigger “Why would you want to lick that brought them all to him. than you would like. Now beat the eggs bowl? All it contains is flour and olive oil?” “These are not huge potatoes! These into stiff peaks in a swooping motion. are sweet potatoes!” he cried, “I am so Pretend you are like a bird swooping “Mmmmm yum! This batter is nice!” embarrassed that you are my daughter!” into a wave. No, not like that. Pretend After this we put the cake in the you are like a bird. Yes, better.” The following week he decided that oven and he went out. Then my mum since he could see out of only one eye “What do I do now?” Exhibit A: victim’s injury came in and said, “Have you consid- and had taken time off work we would “We must let the egg whites rest in a ered using our dog as a foot warmer? I Masterchef, what do most chefs say their do some father-daughter bonding time cool place. No, not there, that is in the know he is small but when he sits near favourite cooking implement is?” during which he would teach me life sun. Yes here, in the dark corner next to my feet, I just sort of put my feet in his skills. “Today I will show you how to the plastic bag full of shredded paper. “That’s easy. Bowl.” armpits and that is very warm.” bake my favourite cake. The somewhat “Dad, can you please get the sieve. We “WRONG! Wooden spoon.” “Food for thought, mum. Thanks.” prosaic title of this cake is ‘Olive Oil need to sift the flour.” “But how can you mix things with At this point dad appeared out of Cake’. I think a lot of people might find “We actually don’t have a sieve. I think your wooden spoon when you don’t nowhere. “That’s gross!” he said to this gross. They might say, “EW YUK using this colander would be better than have a bowl?” mum. She shrugged and walked off. A CAKE MADE OF OIL.” To avoid

20 The fine art of speaking like a highwayman (1990) www.honisoit.com SRC Moving On Ask Abe So you want to move out. What copies of all of your keys and other Dear Abe, should you do? Here is some infor- doorlocking devices (like swipecards). mation on ending a rental agreement You also have to provide “vacant pos- I am on a Youth Allowance payment and I also session” which means all of your work a casual job with varying hours. Some- . belongings have been moved out. times I receive the full payment just under Are you going to complete What if I want to move out and $500, but other times I get much less than that. the length of your agreement? my housemates want to stay? I heard that there is some sort of banking system You will need to find a replacement Refer to your original contract or that affects the amount of money I get, but I am lease. It should state an end date. If it for yourself. If you are on the lease or very confused by all of this. Could you please explain is a contract you should be able to give contract have that changed before you why my payments vary? notice to your landlord equivalent to the go. If you are on the lease, regardless frequency that you pay rent, that you of whether you live there, you are legally are moving out on the end date. Some- and financially liable for the condition Nursing Student times contracts will have a clause about of the premises. Make sure you keep the fee for ending the agreement early. a copy of the new lease or contract to If it is a lease this amount of notice is show that you are no longer on there. either 14 days (fixed term agreement) How do I get my Dear Nursing Student, $486, then by 60 cents in the dollar for or 21 days (continuing agreement). bond or deposit back? income over $486. If you are unsure Notice should be in writing. This does After you have moved out take photos about whether you have been paid the not include text messages and may not to show the condition of the accommo- The banking system you are talking correct amount, gather all your paper- include text. It is best to send this by let- dation. This is to avoid disputes with about is Centrelink’s way of keeping work and talk to an SRC Caseworker the landlord’s assessment of the condi- ter. Allow 4 days extra for mail to arrive. track of the extra money you are earn- about it. What if you want to leave early? tion of your accommodation after you ing. It is called the Student Income There is usually no problem leaving moved out. The cost of any repairs or Bank. Each fortnight you are allowed cleaning will come out of the bond or a rental agreement early. You will usu- to earn $405 without any reduction in Abe ally have to pay four or six weeks worth deposit. The rest of your bond (leased your Youth Allowance. If you earn of rent, depending on what percent- property) should be returned in the less than $405, the left over carries age of the agreement you have already form of a cheque or electronic transfer over to the following fortnight. For The Ask Abe column has been a feature in Honi completed. Sometimes you can find from the Department of Fair Trading. Soit since 2001. During that time, Abe, the SRC’s example, if you only earned $105 in the welfare dog has provided advice to students someone to take your place in the agree- Deposits placed on contracted proper- about Centrelink problems, academic appeals, ment to avoid paying this money. The ties are less regulated. Make sure you first fortnight, you will be allowed to accommodation situations, shortages of money, have your receipt to prove that you earn $705 ($405 + $300) in the second University procedures and a variety of other replacement person has to be a “rea- situations. sonable” replacement. For example, did pay it in the first place. If there fortnight. This process keeps going Unfortunately on 21st June, 2013, Abe died. He you need to have a similar capacity to is any dispute about getting back this until you’ve accumulated a maximum was a few months short of his 18th birthday, and had lived a grand life, full of adventure and love. meet rental payments and the other per- money talk to an SRC Caseworker. of $10,100. I think your Youth Allow- While the SRC is sad to have lost such a wise and son should have a good rental history. ance payment is reduced when you insightful canine, we will continue to produce this column in his memory. If there are any questions When am I considered to have left? have earned more than your Student you would like to ask send an email to: You have only completely left your Income Bank. Your Youth Allowance [email protected]. accommodation when the landlord payment is reduced by 50 cents in the (not another tenant) has received all dollar for amounts between $405 and

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The Fe(de)ral budget: From bad to worse to dreadful (1993) 21 SRC @honi_soit

Hello, readers! The editors of Honi Soit do not control the content of pages 21, 22 and 23 (normally pages 17, 18 and 19). President’s Report [email protected] David Pink waxes lyrical on the role of the SRC in the resurgence of student activism We were told that students no longer ture bashes, petitions, leaflet bombing movement which actually went out engaged with these sorts of tactics. The and flyering against the cuts we turned and organised demonstrations, occu- SRC didn’t organise rallies anymore. Its out a thousand students to a demon- pations, and worked in a mass alliance most recent demonstration had been in stration within the first few weeks of between workers and students, is the 2009 and was a flop: a 50-person march semester. absolute guide to everything I’ve ever down George Street about student hun- We occupied the Dean of Arts’ office, done as an activist. You have helped ger which garnered little to no media then tried to occupy the Senate. There me more than anybody develop as an attention or raising of student political had not been an occupation in 10 years. individual, and discover my theory of consciousness. The EAG started having meetings of change. The National Union of Students still 50 to 80 people and became an absolute Thank you to all the other activists organised so-called ‘National Days of powerhouse. The campaign worked and on the radical left I’ve had the pleasure Action’, but they had degenerated into we helped save hundreds of staff from to work with. Thank you to Evan, to ‘noodle day’ and the farce of my first losing their jobs. Campaigns that actu- Ed, to Tenaya, to Freya, to Erima, to year which involved a patronising sau- ally worked were virtually unknown at Tom, to Kieran, to Brigitte. sage sizzle and the handing out of nov- that stage. This is all common practice You are phenomenal at what you do, elty cheques. now. Our alliances with staff unions, and I have nothing but respect for it. The enviro collective was still strong, the NTEU and CPSU, have been abso- Thank you to Dylan, Jen, John, Ali- and the anti-racism collective still did lutely essential. As we saw in the strikes, sha, Robby, Todd and everyone else in It feels strange to be writing this! good work, but there was no broad- when staff and students unite we are Unity – I don’t always agree with you Given this is my final report, I wanted to based education movement on cam- unbeatable. politically, but you’ve got good hearts reflect on the tremendous achievements pus. Students, even in the Arts and Law What we have now is a mass, cam- and you’re wonderful people. we’ve had over the past two years. faculties, didn’t have any idea the SRC paigning union which students know Thank you to Sydney Labor Stu- The SRC is a very different beast to existed. about and actively participate in. We’re dents. I never thought that when all the one I first became involved in. In As an Education Officer at the SRC not at the 1970s yet, or even the 1990s, of us met in a Chinese restaurant at my first year the SRC had been fol- I was part of a team of people, includ- but we’re on the right course. Haymarket, with a sick feeling at the lowing a long course of being mostly ing Tim Scriven, Freya Bundey and Now for the thank yous. bottom of our stomachs at everything concerned with the delivery of services Evan Gray, who wanted to see the SRC My biggest thank you goes to Casey wrong with NLS, that our dream of a to the student body – legal assistance, transform into a mass campaigning Thompson. You have been an absolute more democratic student Labor caucus social work, secondhand books, etc. union, which could mobilise thousands powerhouse as Education Officer. You that cared about socialism and activism These are valuable in and of them- of students out to rallies and actions, are literally the most organised activist rather than careerism, would actually selves, but they neglect the true role of empower and train people as activists, I have ever met, the hardest working, be realised. Despite the headkicking, a student union, which is to organise and co-ordinate students so they could the most consistently capable at getting we’re still here and no one will ever the student body and campaign for stu- take an active role in grassroots com- things done. There is no one more prin- move us. I’d like to thank all the old dent rights. A lot of first- and second- munity campaigns run with the backing cipled than you. There is not a single hats, from Max, to the other Max, to years getting involved in the SRC this of the SRC’s huge financial resource. person more politically certain about Leon, to Jeremy, to Pete, to Alex, to the year have no idea just how ‘dead’ stu- I helped set up the Education Action what she believes in. Thank you for other Alex, to Chari, to Seb, to Sam, dent activism was in NSW when I came Group (EAG), which had not met for being an amazing partner and a fantas- to James, to Georgia, to Harry and to to uni in 2011. two years, and in the wake of the uni- tic student activist, a committed social- Vivian. I’m inspired by our first-years, like Pip, Max H, Chiara, Oliver, Naa- This was the scenario: there was versity’s announcement of cuts to staff ist and a daring fighter. I hope that we man, Kenan, Harry and everyone else this strange mythology about the we opened up the direction of the cam- will be fighting together for the rest of (sorry to anyone I’ve missed!). 3000-strong anti-VSU demonstrations paign to any student who wanted to our lives. of 2006 which viewed them as a glori- turn up. My second biggest thank you goes to Good luck to Jen as Pres next year. ous but bygone era of student protest, We had literally no existing practice to my ideological inspiration: Tim Scriven. You have a huge job, but I’m sure you’ll now as historically distant as the mora- go off, but the experiment worked. By Tim, you are a creative and formidable be a fantastic student leader. Don’t take toriums of 1970s Vietnam War activists. having weekly meetings, daily stalls, lec- intelligence, whose vision of a student anybody’s flack. You’ll kick ass. Disabilities and Carers’ [email protected] Officer’s Report Sarah Chuah gives us the run down on how to register with Disability Services at USYD tify as having a disability along the way At Sydney University there are around carers). You DO NOT NEED to be has been rewarding and inspiring. 1700 students registered with Disabil- registered with Disability Services to As you are probably aware, ‘disabil- ity Services. This figure is less than the complete this survey. ity’ comes in many forms, and is an total number of students identifying as This anonymous survey data will be umbrella term for any impairments, having a disability at enrollment, which used to communicate students’ experi- activity limitations and participation means it is likely that many students ences and opinions with the University restrictions that arise as a result of a may not getting the support and provi- to inform policy and decision-making. mismatch between personal, social and sions they need and are entitled to. Rea- If you haven’t joined us before, environmental circumstances. sons for this are varied, but may include please come along to our last meeting The experience of ‘disability’ is less- a fear of stigma or a reluctance to dis- It has been a huge privilege being for the year on Wednesday 30 October ened in an environment that accom- close information about the nature of involved with the Disabilities & Carers 12 pm at New Law School Seminar modates for impairments. The majority their impairment. Collective this year. Representing the Room 442. of disabilities are not visible because in If you are a student who identifies as interests of students with disabilities Carers will also meet for the last time addition to physical disability, impair- having a disability, we would love to hear and highlighting carers’ issues in higher in Week 13, with day and time to be ments may also be intellectual, psycho- about your experience studying at Syd- education has been incredibly satisfy- confirmed. If you would like to be logical, neurological, medical, learning ney University. We are collecting data ing, and meeting so many wonderfully involved, send me an email for more or sensory based. through a brief online survey (accessed strong, exceptional students who iden- via www.srcusyd.net.au/disabilitiesand- information.

22 The Soviet Experience (1986) www.honisoit.com SRC

Education Officer’s Report [email protected] Tenaya Alattas defends the importance of un-glamorous grassroots activism Of significance this year to the educa- debt? How? ing fees, precarious insecure casualised tion department has been the 7 days of So, who’s at fault for the poverty of employment (like that of our teachers) industrial action undertaken by staff at student movement? Are the student poli- or minimum wage, no collective bar- Sydney University. ticians to blame whose activism propped gaining and no safety net. There are many tensions inherent in up conveniently around election times? Given that one of the first effects the traditional narrative given by the A spectacle largely consisting of drab we’ll see from the Abbott agenda is a National Tertiary Education Union bureaucrats-in-training seeking to under- widening inability to meet basic costs of (NTEU) and other SRC office bear- cut each other on who could deliver the living, this means projects like eviction ers including assumptions about the most alcohol. resistance, food projects, simple, less desired return to some previous golden Is the left to blame? Did the pickets glamorous activities which are neverthe- age, or the problems of a promised begin to feel like the ritualistic repetition less the heart of building an effective future itself. More so is the lack of abil- of demonstrations without purpose, a resistance. ity to respond reflexively to this period rally or march, operating under a logic Lastly I would like to express my soli- of (class) struggle in anything but a cel- of registration of dissent, that if some- darity to all those arrested during the ebratory light. how the right number of voices were strikes. With 17 arrests, 11 court trials it What one loses in this is the fact that raised, we would change things. not just the charges themselves, nor the many students failed to engage or even As Education Officer I think it is outrageous prospect of being jailed for understand the basis of their staff on important to impress that as a student having the temerity to protest but the strike. This is not because students are at Sydney University, we have #nofu- suspension of life between charge and stupid, apathetic or lacking in empathy. ture. This is not as mighty or noble an verdict which is punitive. But for many a student of more idea of immiseration, nor is it a lofty Many of those arrested at the strike pressing concern is: Where will we ideal espousing a return to times once have not yet faced trial, meaning is that we defend those victimised by the live? How will we be able to afford such past of #freeeducation. Rather it’s the extraordinary gaps between charge and courts, deprived of their liberty, that we expensive rent in Sydney? How will we sober acknowledgement that ‘housing, trial process. In this time, the very pos- do not sit licking our wounds. The strike find jobs that pay enough so that we can higher education, debt, no future, your sibility of a future, a life, the ability to is not ever over. So, on December 2, 3, enjoy ourselves and still live in comfort? life getting worse forever, unless we do travel, or to study is suspended. So even 4, 9, 10 and 11 come to the Downing Will we pay for rent or food this week? something together as a political project if we have #nofuture as part of the left Centre to demonstrate solidarity with When will we pay back our student #jdemoley”. Privatising debt, deregulat- we must come to understand how vital it those arrested.

General Secretary’s Report [email protected] Dylan Parker’s last ever report!

So now that it’s my very last report I We’ve brought activist budgets to done this year. Yet all of this has been thought it worth looking at some of the their highest level since VSU so we in the context of steering our organisa- wins the SRC had for you this year. It’s can keep the University and Abbott to tion through an inherited funding cut your money so you should know what account. of over $70,000, spiralling staff costs, I’ve done with it. Just to name a few: We’ve negotiated a fairer deal while and diminished bookshop revenues. We’ve expanded our casework service remaining affiliated to the National That’s why I’m really proud of our and kept an additional caseworker on so Union of Students so you have a voice SRC this year because in a tough con- there are more people sticking up for on the national scale. text where it always hard to say no we’ve you. We’ve also added a free migration managed to expand our services yet We’ve increased our free legal service agent so International students get a make sure we are on a sure footing for hours by over 40% so you now have better deal. the future. more access to a lawyer than ever before. These are just some of the things

Women’s Officer’s Report [email protected] Hannah Smith invites wom*n to Reclaim The Night in 2013 Hi all! order to make our collective more inclu- will be held this Saturday, 26th Octo- A quick update on what the Wom*n’s sive. There will be more information ber. If you are available to come along, collective has been up to in the last few and explanation around this decision at please do. Reclaim is an annual protest weeks of semester. a later date. against violence against wom*n and has Last week, we held Knightess, which is Being the end of the year we also voted been organised by two fantastic Sydney a wom*n’s performance night aimed at on new wom*n’s officers, Congratula- Uni wom*n this year. redressing the underrepresentation of tions to our new representatives who It will begin with a picnic from 3.30 at wom*n in the performing arts. you will be hearing from soon. Prince Alfred Park, Central and feature It was held at Hermann’s bar and was What is noteworthy is that our collec- fantastic performers and speakers. The a fantastic night of music performances, tive had it’s first contested election in march will begin at approximately 7pm drama and poetry. It was widely attended recent history, We believe this is a testa- and will be an autonomous wom*n’s and was a great way of getting wom*n’s ment to the strength of Wom*n’s Col- march. voices out there as well as raising the lective and the passion of the wom*n Once again, if you wish to get involved profile of the women’s collective. within it. or have question, feel free to get into We also recently voted to put an aster- Finally, some of us are in the final plan- contact with us at usydwomenscollec- isk in the place of the ‘e’ in women in ning stages of Reclaim the Night which [email protected]

A cartoon (a heading for all those who can’t tell their arses from their elbows) (1992) 23 huge fucking @honi_soit fin crossword

Zplig

41 ...funnily it is a rum dessert (8) 68 Minxes lose it about key observer cruciverbal- 97 Puff up a dirty blemish outside (5) ACROSS: CRYPTIC 43 Weird mourners hop out full of promise, not ist? (7) 101 The end of the world will change moods in 1 Our university is, say, heartless, a retro conclu- expressing sorrow (12) 70 America left Uzis for Master’s odd bowmen 24 hours (8) sion, and intrusive about unknowns sheltering 46 Heard to observe a limitless quantity (3) in Rhodesia (8) 103 A remote control bow (3) (6,10) 47 Private parts of Woodrow Nelson (3) 73 Player is more willing to face danger (5) 105 Kind of deviant affected said ways (7) 9 Odd members removed from Texas with severe 48 For example, bin Laden and Sanchez stir 75 Dismiss a hacker? (3) 106 Chances are downing LSD does give the ill endemic - I will hide from TCM perhaps? (7,8) resort construction (10) 76 Objective male is on record for support, e.g. solution! (4) 17 Majestic priest hit hard the old time teller 50 Peacekeepers’ confused like a wild horse? (9) (4) 107 He was consumed by a New Earth flower (11,5) 52 A yearning for Asian capital (3) 77 Retrospectively; have a meal in the approxi- family? (7) 25 US navy attack of us harboured - It is morally mate arrival time (3) 109 Revolutionary braved swiftly, for example offensive! (9) 53 Perpetuate entire redevelopment with subtle extremes (8) 79 Doctor Who and Superman are both found to (6) 26 Non-believer makes for a believer! (7) change in these? (5,3) 54 Speak impiously of God, sheep and lamb get- 111 A supporting piece actor gave back nothing 27 Strange of a virtue to become preferred? (9) ting exotic! (9) 81 CSI do dance to SNF music (5) to the company, and leading-man emptied the past President! (7,7) 28 Allow a computer from 2001 be deadly (6) 56 Listen, I will go to a vacation spot! (4) 83 Unpalatable lapel design is less popular? (3-4) 115 Doctors hear effervescence by one irregular 29 Kind of cycle of me leaving after using urinal 57 I’m bisexual for a poet’s feet (5) 85 Einsteinium removal from spleen carried out (5) strikingly fine (8) canister releasing watered insides (10) 58 Demagogue weirdly belabours the Queen, 118 Be better than the most upper section (3) 31 Schedule new trainer in one year (9) around the Right (6-6) 87 I would eat, but not finish, a noodle creation? 32 Alien hater, East, hides in broken 79A (9) (4) 119 Irrational number over an odd integer by 60 Joker consumed nitrogen for a mobster (8) speed of light is relating to E (9) 33 Propelling wonder - inspiring sounds (6) 89 Make specification to angrily sue sitcom (9) 61 Course summaries sally new public transport 121 Crush and love quietly bring together (7) 35 The wife’s oddly strange around Hollywood? systems (10) 90 Tool’s loud offensive woman (3) 124 Flick through an old document (6) (3,4) 63 Cool devotee (3) 91 Perhaps I roam about mega unreal reconstruc- tion around nightmare’s start? (5,7) 127 I’d make drug incitation about a key act of 36 It may be Chordata is found to be Afro-Asi- 64 Signal caused missing seconds (3) atic (maybe) (6) 93 What occurs to hearts of entire specie evolu- designating (14) 65 Trained pigeon initially ran out to originating tion around lakes’ head? (5,7) 130 USU Japanese club was a bigwig product! 37 Train king with 28A revolutionary way of country (4) solving problems (7,8) 96 Admires a mad model - perhaps put into a (6) 66 Crazy, tall and angry - the qualities of being play? (9) 131 Impart skills without a smart school? (4) 40 Uniter of ice-cream and berry essence... (7) a hero! (9)

24 Cops - a few bad apples? Or rotten to the core (1992) fin INSIDE THIS WEEK: THE NOT MUCH, IT WAS A SLOW NEWS WEEK. HOW... PUZZLING SFor the last time, doesOIN not rhyme with ‘coin’ or ‘groin’ 132 Ex-PM’s new drunk drive review initially 231 Treasures provided from riches he’s created 20 Abnormally (10) 153 Shows up (7) out... (5,4) (9) 21 Achieved with an extra year of study (7,6) 154 The year is split up into four of these for 133 ...belittled Switzerland and Peru - it’s in a 234 Strange mean of someone’s reputation? (4) 22 Skyrim, for example (4-7,4) schoolkids (5) need of change! (9) 237 ‘tis the contraction (3) 23 Shakespearean character (7) 156 First prime (3) 136 An easy task for bishop to re-seize without 238 To be exhausted from bore (3) 157 Very famous person (6) Southern one (6) 24 Highest African peak (11) 239 Vote with regard to new reef put north? 30 Free from blemishes (11) 159 Stitched back up (6) 137 Caesar composed a poem in 02 and 03? Sounds dumb (10) (4,5) 34 Part of the buttock (7,7) 161 Kasparov, for example (11) 240 Throw away a sound silencer for new FM 162 Wedge placed above some letters (5) 140 Winter Olympics event was violently close fun within endless rules (8) 38 Measures made to destroy planes (3,7) around left loop (6) 165 PE in America (3) 242 Jokers perform in exotic drag around 100 - 39 Small amount (7) 142 Mystical heap perhaps? (12) front stage! (7,5) 40 Call for help (3) 166 4D cube (9) 144 A ring before the bullets exercise power? 245 Heard volcanic output provides baby insect 42 Lunatic (6) 167 Ask to do something (7) (4,3,5) (5) 44 Too much light(photography) (11) 168 Lab jelly (4) 148 In anticipation raise nickel and nitrogen 246 Track a deceiver moving backwards (4) 170 The ability to make new things (10) starting costs in a deviated regular section (2,7) 45 Impromptu (11) 247 Road’s tone is damaged by violent wind- 49 4 over 5, or 5 over 6 (6,8) 174 Possibly Greek or Russian (8,6) 151 As a precaution remove exotic headgear for storms (9) old Peruvians (5) 50 One in Spanish (3) 176 1000ml (5) 249 Stay dry in teleportation machine(prion not 177 “No problem” (4) 153 Someone in space is loud when in a vehicle required) (8) 51 Mr. T’s group (1-4) giving off gravity and oxygen (9) 178 Oil for the hair (6) 251 Speed is extracted from amphibians (3) 54 New York (3,5) 155 Consumption of Yttrium and thyroxin - 55 Work for (6,2) 179 One fifth of a Shakespeare play (3) chosen functions of a part of Gatorade? (12) 252 A cunning belief theory favouring govern- ment abolishment (9) 59 Decompress a file (5) 183 Definite article (3) 158 Perplexingly tamper with a bank lady’s 184 Liquorice-flavoured cordial (8) limbs (12) 255 Assumption that I shy about Marijuana he’s 62 Luxurious car (4) into (10) 185 A female successor (9) 160 Engaged in the redevelopment of Iran, e.g. 64 Gradual increase in music (9) (2,4) 256 247A contain a rocky hill (3) 67 Source of caffeine (3) 187 Money (4) 162 In a terribly evil manner he nosily shifted 258 Little helper shows self doubts finally leav- 69 Popular board game (8) 188 Wind instrument (5) ing (3) around a pub’s interior (9) 71 Large bright handkerchief (7) 189 Piece of cloth (3) 163 Old Iran is back in the early Ptolemaic era 259 Anderson character dug luck - lying around 191 Land of the Stars and Stripes (3) (4,8) 72 English, Scottish, Welsh, or Northern Irish (6) (7) 193 Someone who presents things well (7) 262 A president’s life energy comes from a post 164 A vicious reptile showed in a beginner 74 Big piece of meat (1-4,5) 194 For example, “I’m sorry” (7) plaintiff, for example, dropping computers (9) sport party (5-3) 263 Adjusted with a way of thinking straight (7) 78 Lure (4) 196 Droop (3) 169 Artificial compound is not true indepen- 80 Extinct human (11) 197 Designed to fit everybody (3-4-4-3) dent of experience and facts (9) 265 Undebatable university convenor trials 82 Not suitable (13) 200 Requiring all your abilities (11) 171 Yearn for some teachers! (4) fixed... (15) 84 Colourful carp (3) 201 Get very angry (2,9) 172 Power is found in the French Gyre Order 268 ...Deep Blue for doing one do-over (6) (6) 269 Writers I have briefed to being deeply 86 Highly offensive (9) 202 Cheat, in a way (4) 173 Unchanging in pole position - You can’t go thoughtful (7) 88 Device used to connect CPU to phone line 203 Having only one spouse (8) back here! (14) 271 Latin America came in without godly wor- (5) 206 Accident (3) 175 Narrow passages in the Bermuda isles (6) ship? (6) 90 Valentine symbols (6) 207 Mounds made by insects (8) Attempt to fast track migration back to Australia! 178 Shifty spy and Agency leader preserve in 274 Gaping open hide broken with odour (9) 92 Citizen Kane filmmaker (5,6) 209 Someone who is quite wealthy (16) sleep wear (7) 276 Threw away student number retroactively 94 Designer Chanel (4) 210 Virgo, for example (4,2,3,6) and asked for ID (9) 180 Contest worker party form? (9) 95 In favour of (3) 212 Self-service cleaner (10) 277 One magician provided conception (5) 181 Tabloid topic is back in Doofus’ substance? 96 Forceful (7) 215 Bother (5) (3) 279 More than one core clue in disarray (6) 98 Fan (5) 217 “The Catcher in the ___” (3) 182 Greatly drunk act organised something 280 Spell out from the beginning, forgetting 99 Broadcast (3) found in a movie? (10) ‘O’, with energy in a vocal expression (9) 219 Eternal (11) 100 Pokémon star (3) 186 Regarding modern era promotions; adapt 281 Groups a fool ought to hear second? (7) 221 Essential (4) and move to spots for clients (9,5) 102 Part of equipment used for gliding over 223 To some extent (5,1,7) 283 Sausage provides energy for each with for- snow (3) 190 Businessman or a plaintiff? (6) ward motion when ingested initially? (9) 228 Leaves, straw etc. used to protect roots of 104 Hats (4) 192 A kismet re-creation is a fault (7) 284 Measurement sphere follows us in NFL? new trees (5) 108 Black gunk (3) 195 Reduced by the French Secret Service (4) (8,8) 230 Dracula’s home (12) 110 Accept as true (7) 197 Violent act in interruption period about a 285 Absence of purpose in sensing salesmen 232 Stringed musical instruments (5-7) railway (7) at sea (15) 111 Without intention (12) 233 Agent for washing the hair (7) 198 Big time Egyptian god followed Egypt’s 286 Possible framing material found for EU - 112 Greedily (6) 235 Retro car (6) beginning (3) close call! - constructed estate without initial 113 Something often said to be dead? (8) safety (9,7) 236 Reddish-brown (5,6) 199 Withdrawing help in Geelong outskirt - 114 Richard III burial site (9) 241 Very soft (10) about 100 (8) 115 Common piece of clothing (5) 243 Philosopher’s study (3) 202 Humpy beast arrived with the Left? (5) 116 Con (4) 244 Unfit to inhabit (10) 204 Lynx may be donated or trashed! (9) down: QUICK 117 Fancy tie (6) 248 Make clear (9) 205 “Good pick of cards dude!” - Most helpful 1 What you’re reading, for example (7,9) 120 Chinese meditative exercise (3,3) assistant (5-4,3) 250 Member of Iroquois people (anagram: at 2 Extended discussion (9) 122 Energy (3) a cursor) (9) 208 Opposition to innovation of prisoners put on TV with armies is strange? (12) 3 Young eel (5) 123 Mental problems in a child (7,5) 253 Disgrace (8) 210 Observe Sweden’s odd fellows? (3) 4 One-eighty (1-4) 125 Movable house (7) 254 It would (3) 211 Adaptable like gold? (9) 5 Short rural poem (4) 126 Large body of water (5) 257 Small structure resembling a rootlet (sounds like ‘far beyond the norm’) (7) 213 Piece of glass causes distress, so I’ve heard 6 Fix (6) 128 More irritable (6) (4) 7 A Gershwin (3) 129 Problem in philosophy (9) 260 Something done in tree that is followed by love? (7) 214 Like a vampire, be unprincipled around a 8 Jewish god (6) 134 Male pronoun (3) 261 Joins the military (7) theistic leader (8) 9 Inferior imitator (7) 135 Nuclear weapon (1-4) 264 “___ plan, Lisa needs braces” (6) 216 An excuse for an early message (7) 10 Relating to the use of irony (9) 138 Was logical (4,5) 266 Authoritative rule (6) 218 Fake self - a misdirection (5) 11 Fire ____ (12) 139 Taxi (3) 267 Jean-Philippe composer (6) 220 Mental student held with Capone (8) 12 Remarkable (10) 141 Cause to be smelly (American) (7) 270 “Get out” (5) 222 Move to a part of India (3) 13 Printer mistake (7) 143 Follower of Scar (5) 272 Beginning (5) 224 Punishment for SAlt coming back without 14 Uncertain (4) 145 Feminine (8) a model on Habib’s start (4) 273 Actor Christopher (5) 15 Immune to attack (12) 146 Really enjoys (4,2) 225 6 letters finish - that is to say... (3) 275 Big brass instrument (4) 16 Identical (5) 147 Making a show of holiness (13) 226 ... a rise in rate of director’s order... (5) 276 Sandwich shop (4) 17 Formal clubs (6) 149 Garment holders (4,7) 227 ...being after odd comedian? (8) 278 An epic (4) 18 Summit (4) 150 Defective (3) 229 Refined man leered oddly (7) 282 Our sun (3) 19 Became smaller (8) 152 Flashy (6)

NOT HAPPY ABOUT THIS BIG FUCKING CROSSWORD TAKING UP OUR ENTIRE FRONT PAGE - SOIN EDS [@THE_SOIN] 25 THE SOIN Our final writers for the year are: Cameron Smith and Joe Istiphan - WHO DID WHAT? BILL SHORTEN BEGINS THE SOIN COUNTING NUMBERS AGAINST BILL SHORTEN EXCLUSIVE: Labor leader and numbers press conference in the par- man Bill Shorten is report- liamentary gallery for late Fri- BALLPIT OF DEATH edly telling nervous MPs this day to announce his change Tragedy struck last Thursday their catchy electro-pop.” week that the party should of support to rival leader when Stuart Johnson, a first dump Bill Shorten from the Anthony Albanese, much to year Commerce student, was While the funeral/concert top job, lest the federal Labor the dismay of the Shorten killed in the ball pit erected became one of the festival’s Party face a crushing defeat camp. on the Front Lawns for the most successful events with on election day, the likes of 2013 Verge Festival. John- tickets selling out in hours, which they haven’t seen in This move comes only weeks son’s friends recalled that many are concerned that weeks. after Mr Albanese’s previous he had spent his first year of the murderous ball pit was leadership bid came to an university perched wistfully only the latest instalment Amid growing concerns abrupt end, following a failed on the sidelines, too crippled in the growing infantilisa- about his own leadership, Mr run for the top job that saw Mr by self-consciousness to fully tion of student culture. With Shorten is said to have told Albanese only collect 62% of engage with student life. A few ponies at the Humanitarian MPs that his own unpopularity rank-and-file votes, well short days before the incident, how- Fair and Christian-eating with rank-and-file members of the 120% of votes required ever, he had declared that he lions at Interfaith Week, it is was “killing” the opposition’s to outweigh factional backing. was ready to “dive right in to felt it was only a matter of chances at the next election, life on campus.” He was true time before the trend turned due to his “undeserved” repu- Despite Mr Shorten’s attempt to his word and after plung- deadly. USU administration tation for unseating party to unseat himself, backers of ing head first into the festival have responded by pushing leaders. In an unprecedented the Shorten leadership within attraction, he suffered a fatal for a return to the more adult- move Mr Shorten has called a the Labor party have declared head injury. focused events of the Verge they will not give in without a Festival’s early years such as fight, and will continue to can- The Verge Directors were the “Managing Mortgages in vas numbers and rally mem- unavailable for comment at Manning” workshop in 2002 bers behind Mr Shorten, even the time, but it wasn’t long or the Impotence and Incon- without Mr Shorten’s support. before they had scheduled tinence” exhibition of 2005. an event for the following day The USU’s end of semester called, “Verge Presents: Stu’s party “Waiting in Line Outside Mr Shorten has indicated he FUNeral feat. the Preatures”. a Licensed Venue” is widely will spend his future time out The event’s description believed to be the first product of office working on his mem- invited students to “Help us of this new ethos but its first oirs, running a client state UNLEASH Stu’s soul into the major test will be “O-Week with his mother in law, and cosmos before the Preatures 2014: Inevitable Disillusion- undermining Mr Albanese knock you off your feet with ment.” from the sidelines.

UOW RETRACTS OFFERS, STUDENTS RELIEVED Year 12 students across place at Wollongong, and I the state were relieved after was just like, ‘what did I do to receiving letters retract- deserve this!’, and then they ing their offers to the UOW, retracted and it was all good.” sources told The Soin. The University of Wollongong last In other news, Sydney Uni- week mistakenly sent early versity has continued to send offers to 275 high school leav- monkey themed Valentine’s ers. Day cards to HSC students waiting on news about their One respondent told The Soin: applications. “I got a letter offering me a Foolish student ignores the inevitability of death by playing in doomed ballpit

26 GATES! GATES! GATES! → TONY ABBOTT AND PETA The prince george NASAL DELIVERY SYSTEM presents CREDLIN AWARD FOR award for pre- LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT DIVISIONS AT HOME ordained infant AWARD FOR INADEQUATE STAYING POWER NLS/SLS split Jethro Cohen Sometimes shit gets so real We don’t know what Cohen USYD Wi-Fi you just need to be with does, or who he is, or why he’s Ever been so excited, so someone else. so involved as a first year. All impassioned, so close, so very we know is he’s destined to close – don’t stop – yes, yes, John Kerr award for do something, somewhere, for almost there, FUCK... and then JESSE JAMES MEMORIAL it just drops off? Then you’ve treacherous and, on some Society / the USU / the AWARD SRC / his CV. probably experienced the some interpretations, technological apocalypse that unconstitutional SUSF is Sydney University’s wireless dismissal HONI SOIT AWARD FOR internet infrastructure. No one does highway rob- BLATANT PROPAGANDA Hannah Morris bery like our ‘student run’ sports organisation. USSC KEVIN RUDD AWARD FOR President of the University of The US Studies Centre is a MOST CENSORIOUS AND Sydney Union, Hannah Morris, LUCIFER AWARD FOR mouthpiece for arms manu- DESTABILISING FORCE IN was a key player in the – for FALLING FROM GRACE facturers, biotech corpora- THE AUSTRALIAN now, attempted – dismissal of tions, the Murdoch press, Vice Pres Tom Raue. Matthews and the White House. But LABOR PARTY or Waniganayaka will likely Harry Stratton they’ve got some neat guest Malcolm Fraser his position. Rising star of National/Syd- lecturers! David Pink ney Labor Students, SRC The current SRC President AUgusto PINOCHET AWARD Welfare Officer, candidate CLIVE PALMER AWARD FOR David Pink was the lead architect of the split from for Honi – the good times, FOR BIGGEST RIGHT-WING SHIT TONNES OF MONEY National Labor Students into COUP however, did not continue to roll. He was kicked off SEX, AND NO SENSE Sydney Labor Students. He and lost preselection for Vice was also a lead architect in Jennifer Light President, 22-7, to a first ST. PAUL’S ALUMNI AWARD censoring Vagina Soit. Student Unity member Jen- year. Ooft. nifer Light accidentally goes FOR TASTEFUL PARTIES from member of Executive to GINA RINEHART AWARD President of the SRC. That’s PAT MASSARANI AWARD SDA AWARD FOR MOST FOR SUCCESSFUL MEDIA life, eh! FOR MOST LITIGIOUS USELESS UNION BUYOUT STRATEGY STUDENT POLITICIAN THE LAW LIBRARY STENCH USU Liv Ronan & OF IMPROPRIETY AWARD Tom Raue TRIPLE THREAT: From Robby Magyar As mentioned earlier, Tom Native American head- Ronan and Magyar both SUPRA Raue is taking the USU to dresses to a schoolchild managed the victorious SEX THE SUPREME COURT. Let themed party to a Day of the for Honi campaign. Magyar SUPRA Pres abruptly retires. the games begin. Dead party to not consulting is pursuing the Union Presi- Our emails go unanswered. the Indigenous community dency, and Ronan is likely to Nothing to see here. during their Indigenous Week run for Board next year. youPorn.com double to scabbing on the strike, the KLEENEX TWO-PLY EXTRA penetration award for USU has caused fun times Honourable Mentions: or, being fucked over twice for us, frustration for others, why the fuck did we put so LENGTH SCENTED AWARD and a lot of grief for itself. many gates here? No space! • Russell Brand and Katy Perry BULL Jeremy Elphick Award for Oddest Bedfellows: KANYE ‘NO ONE (WO)MAN We assume. Someone who NLS and the Indies Something tells us running read it told us that. SHOULD HAVE ALL THAT • Pavel Dmitrichenko Award for on lime green was his first POWER’ WEST AWARD Faceless Man: Callum Drake mistake, and running on • Two and a Half Men Award for TONY ABBOTT’S CABINET lime green again was his Single Entendre: Sex for Honi second. In a surprising turn AWARD FOR FEMALE Astha Rajvanshi • Biggest Loser Award for Los- of events, however, Raue’s ing Big: Evil for Honi REPRESENTATION dismissal would mean he’d Rajvanshi was President of be replaced by Elphick on the USU from 2012-2013, • Christopher Columbus Award for Fucking Up Geography: Board, causing a third loss and is currently the Immedi- Incubate ate Past President. She will Sarah Marriott and the ‘Her- One woman out of fifteen. as his soul implodes while mann’s Beer Garden’ policy trying to sit through a USU also be an editor of vener- Lots of money, not much Tiananmen Square Trophy for Board meeting. able student publication Honi • gender diversity. Soit from next year. Time Public Space Management: will tell how this turns out. NSW Riot Police ‘The Libs Ruined My Favourite THE ‘SURVIVED AN THE JOINT ROB Read Honi next year for more • updates. Wait, hold on. TV Shows’ Award: Will & ICEPICK IN THE HEAD’ OAKESHOTT AND TONY Grace Union Board campaign AWARD FOR THE MOST WINDSOR AWARD FOR • Methuselah Award for Sticking INTENSE TROTSYKIST MOST IRRELEVANT Madeleine mccann Around: Rhys Pogonoski GROUP INDEPENDENTS HIDE & SEEK AWARD • Engineering Award for FOR MYSTERIOUS Drunken Hooliganism: The USU Board at Ed Revue Socialist DISAPPEARANCE USYD Indies • ‘Holy Shit, it was Crack not Alternative The ‘Voice’ Independents Andrew Potter Ecstasy!’ Award for Peaking Holy shit, they’re back. The were once, arguably, the Too Soon: Alexandra Brown infamous Trots were gone largest faction on campus. After the Dalai Lama debacle, • Schutzstaffel Award for Worst for a few years, but have Now they have one councillor the University’s PR head Initials: Sophie Stanton been revived at USYD by an on the SRC and a frag- Andrew Potter just...van- • Award for not Mentioning ished. If you have any infor- Alistair Stephenson, Ben Foolish student ignores the inevitability of death by playing in doomed ballpit ex-Monash student doing a mented support base :/ second Arts degree. mation please contact us. Paull, or Caccamo: Us