No. Conversation Starters at Alzheimer´s and Dementia Support (Private Facebook Group)

1 Stuart B. Jennings April 5, 2018, 8:36 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Feb 27, 2018, 7:34 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings May 6, 2018, 6:31 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings July 19, 2018, 10:43 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings April 2, 2018, 9:05 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings March 9, 2018, 8:17 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Oct 29, 2019, 9:15 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Apr 17, 2019, 9:56 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK 1 Stuart B. Jennings Apr 6, 2019, 8:40 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Oct 1, 2018, 9:18 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK 1 Stuart B. Jennings June 16, 2018, 10:25 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings June 2, 2018, 5:52 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings May 22, 2018, 10:10 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK 1 Stuart B. Jennings March 7, 2018, 7:13 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Feb 4, 2018, 1:42 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Feb 3, 2018, 12:28 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Jan 14, 2018, 12:10 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings March 7, 2018, 11:20 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Dec 8, 2017, 12:22 AM Male Doctoral Retired UK 1 Stuart B. Jennings Dec 2, 2017, 11:34 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings March 18, 2019, 9:07 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings March 13, 2018, 11:06 PMMale Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Jan 14, 2018, 3:50 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Feb 7, 2018, 9:34 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

1 Stuart B. Jennings Dec 16, 2017, 2:41 PM Male Doctoral Retired UK

2 Christine Cain Aug 2 at 1:35 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain Nov 4, 2019, 12:33 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive 2 Christine Cain August 21 at 12:50 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain Aug 7 at 2:13 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain Nov 5, 2019, 12:44 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain Sept 25 at 1:03 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain July 19 at 1:40 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain July 18 at 11:25 PM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain June 7 at 11:45 Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain June 5 at 2:46 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain Oct 23 at 1:11 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain Sept 26 at 1:23 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive

2 Christine Cain Sept 11 at 2:54 AM Female Service ManagerUSA (Ohio) in Automotive 3 Kate Perry Oct 5 at 6:21 PM Female UK

3 Kate Perry Sept 17 at 11:26 PM, 2018Female UK

3 Kate Perry Jan 17 at 7:54 AM, 2018 Female UK

3 Kate Perry July 14 at 7:25 PM, 2018 Female UK

3 Kate Perry Oct 2 at 11:30 PM, 2018 Female UK 3 Kate Perry Dec 5 at 7:59 PM, 2018 Female UK 3 Kate Perry Nov 14 at 8:14 PM, 2018 Female UK

3 Kate Perry Aug 26 at 9:39 AM, 2018 Female UK

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3 Kate Perry Apr 25 at 6:29 PM Female UK 3 Kate Perry Dec 28 at 8:36 PM, 2019 Female UK 3 Kate Perry Aug 12 at 12:39 AM, 2018Female UK

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3 Kate Perry Dec 4 at 9:10 AM, 2017 Female UK

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3 Kate Perry July 11 at 8:34 AM, 2018 Female UK

3 Kate Perry Dec 25 at 10:52 PM, 2017Female UK

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3 Kate Perry Aug 19 at 10:45 PM, 2018Female UK 3 Kate Perry Aug 7 at 8:14 AM, 2018 Female UK

3 Kate Perry June 21 at 7:47 AM, 2018 Female UK 3 Kate Perry Jan 14 at 12:35 PM, 2018 Female UK

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3 Kate Perry July 20 at 7:51 PM Female UK

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3 Kate Perry June 11 at 10:28 PM Female UK 3 Kate Perry June 24 at 8:57 AM Female UK

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3 Kate Perry Feb 1 at 8:38 AM, 2018 Female UK 3 Kate Perry May 29 at 9:04 PM Female UK

3 Kate Perry Oct 22 at 12:13 AM, 2018Female UK

3 Kate Perry Sept 17 at 11:26 PM, 2018Female UK

3 Kate Perry July 27 at 11:46 PM, 2018Female UK

3 Kate Perry July 1 at 11:50 AM, 2018 Female UK

3 Kate Perry March 30 at 8:40 PM, 2018Female UK

3 Kate Perry Feb 14 at 8:04 PM, 2018 Female UK

3 Kate Perry Jan 17 at 9:14 PM, 2018 Female UK

3 Kate Perry July 14 at 1:42 PM Female UK

3 Kate Perry Oct 12 at 12:16 AM Female UK 3 Kate Perry May 18 at 8:35 AM Female UK

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3 Kate Perry Aug 22 at 11:52 PM, 2019Female UK

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3 Kate Perry Aug 10 at 8:34 AM, 2017 Female UK

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3 Kate Perry Oct 12 at 11:53 PM Female UK

3 Kate Perry Jan 20 at 10:53 PM, 2018 Female UK

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3 Kate Perry Aug 25 at 7:28 PM Female UK 4 Héléne Barrette Sept 21 at 11:39 PM Female Canada

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4 Héléne Barrette Sept 9 at 12:43 AM Female Canada

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4 Héléne Barrette Jan 25 Female Canada 4 Héléne Barrette Sept 8 at 2:33 AM Female Canada

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4 Héléne Barrette Dec 21, 2018 Female Canada

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4 Héléne Barrette Jul 7, 2018 Female Canada 4 Héléne Barrette Jun 7, 2018 Female Canada 4 Héléne Barrette May 26, 2018 Female Canada

5 Barb Dee Nov 4 Female

5 Barb Dee Jan 7 Female

5 Barb Dee Nov 1 Female

5 Barb Dee Oct 21 Female

5 Barb Dee Oct 18 Female 5 Barb Dee Oct 18 Female

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5 Barb Dee Dec 29, 2018 Female

5 Barb Dee Feb 10 Female

5 Barb Dee Sep 7 Female

5 Barb Dee Aug 10 Female 6 Daniel Boudreau Sep 13 Male

6 Daniel Boudreau Sep 3 Male

6 Daniel Boudreau Aug 20 Male

6 Daniel Boudreau Oct 3 Male

6 Daniel Boudreau Sep 25 Male 6 Daniel Boudreau Aug 22 Male

6 Daniel Boudreau Oct 28 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Nov 5 Male 7 Joaquin Marin Jul 19 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Apr 8 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Apr 1 Male

7 Joaquin Marin May 26, 2018 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Feb 2 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Sep 13 Male 7 Joaquin Marin Aug 11 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Apr 17 Male 7 Joaquin Marin March 30 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Nov 4 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Oct 28 Male 7 Joaquin Marin Oct 28 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Oct 28 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Oct 27 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Oct 24 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Oct 18 Male 7 Joaquin Marin Sep 17 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Aug 25 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Aug 14 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Aug 12 Male 7 Joaquin Marin June 3, 2018 Male

7 Joaquin Marin May 26, 2018 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Jan 30 Male

7 Joaquin Marin May 26, 2018 Male

7 Joaquin Marin March 31 Male 7 Joaquin Marin Nov 30, 2018 Male

7 Joaquin Marin March 30 Male

7 Joaquin Marin Nov 30, 2018 Male 7 Joaquin Marin May 23, 2018 Male

7 Joaquin Marin May 27, 2018 Male

7 Joaquin Marin May 25, 2018 Male

8 Andleeb A Joyia Nov 30 Female Mobilink

8 Andleeb A Joyia Sep 6 Female 8 Andleeb A Joyia Sep 11 Female

8 Andleeb A Joyia Oct 29 Female

8 Andleeb A Joyia Sep 23 Female

8 Andleeb A Joyia Sep 2 Female

8 Andleeb A Joyia Aug 25 Female

9 Rhett Anderson Sep 9 Male 9 Rhett Anderson Oct 27 Male

9 Rhett Anderson Jul 28 Male

9 Rhett Anderson Oct 12 Male

9 Rhett Anderson Sep 4 Male

9 Rhett Anderson Jul 27 Male 9 Rhett Anderson Sep 2 Male

9 Rhett Anderson Aug 2 Male

9 Rhett Anderson Sep 12 Male

9 Rhett Anderson Nov 3 Male

10 Jessie Calderon Mar 17 Female

10 Jessie Calderon Jan 18 Female

10 Jessie Calderon Sep 27 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Aug 7 Female

10 Jessie Calderon Aug 5 Female

10 Jessie Calderon Nov 18, 2018 Female

10 Jessie Calderon Nov 2, 2018 Female

10 Jessie Calderon Oct 29, 2018 Female

10 Jessie Calderon Jan 28 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Aug 19 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Jul 27 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Oct 18, 2018 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon May 14 Female 10 Jessie Calderon May 27 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Apr 5 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Apr 21 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Nov 2 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon May 9 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Mar 28 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Nov 30, 2018 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Jul 22 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Feb 19 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Jan 11 Female

10 Jessie Calderon Oct 22, 2018 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Nov 3 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Jan 1 F+D390:D392emale

10 Jessie Calderon Jan 1 Female

10 Jessie Calderon Dec 26, 2018 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Nov 25, 2018 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Nov 7, 2018 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Nov 3, 2018 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon May 12 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Oct 22, 2018 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Oct 17, 2018 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Apr 1 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Mar 24 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Dec 21, 2018 Female 10 Jessie Calderon Dec 16, 2018 Female

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10 Jessie Calderon Oct 24, 2018 Female 11 Meriska Anaya Holt Apr 29 Female 11 Meriska Anaya Holt Oct 6 Female

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12 Místy Abraham Apr 9 Female

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12 Místy Abraham Jul 11 Female 12 Místy Abraham May 14 Female

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12 Místy Abraham Mar 28 Female 13 Cori Cole Nov 2 Female 13 Cori Cole Aug 26 Female

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14 Deborah Lowman Jun 10, 2018 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Aug 1 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Jul 4 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Jun 2, 2018 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Oct 9 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Sep 26 Female

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14 Deborah Lowman Aug 5, 2018 Female 14 Deborah Lowman Jun 7, 2018 Female

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14 Deborah Lowman Nov 12, 2018 Female

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14 Deborah Lowman Mar 28, 2018 Female 14 Deborah Lowman Oct 18 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Sep 11 Female

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14 Deborah Lowman Feb 18 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Dec 29, 2018 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Oct 23 Female 14 Deborah Lowman Sep 7 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Mar 15 Female

14 Deborah Lowman May 9, 2018 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Mar 13, 2018 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Oct 26 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Jul 29 Female 14 Deborah Lowman Mar 29 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Jan 18 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Sep 16 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Aug 13 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Aug 1 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Feb 13 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Dec 29, 2018 Female 14 Deborah Lowman Mar 14, 2018 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Sep 22 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Jun 26 Female

14 Deborah Lowman Mar 20, 2018 Female 14 Deborah Lowman Nov 30, 2018 Female

15 Cara Booth Oct 12, 2018 Female 15 Cara Booth Mar 19 Female

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15 Cara Booth Nov 5 Female

15 Cara Booth Sep 30 Female 15 Cara Booth Aug 17 Female

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15 Cara Booth Nov 16, 2018 Female

15 Cara Booth Oct 16, 2018 Female

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15 Cara Booth Nov 25, 2017 Female 15 Cara Booth Aug 20, 2018 Female 15 Cara Booth Oct 22 Female

15 Cara Booth Jun 15 Female 15 Cara Booth Apr 20 Female

15 Cara Booth Oct 7, 2018 Female 15 Cara Booth Sep 11, 2018 Female

15 Cara Booth Jun 5, 2018 Female 15 Cara Booth Mar 29, 2018 Female 15 Cara Booth Feb 2, 2018 Female 15 Cara Booth Dec 30, 2017 Female

15 Cara Booth Jan 4, 2018 Female 16 Nora Generalao Oct 13 Female USA

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16 Nora Generalao Oct 7 Female USA 16 Nora Generalao Oct 12 Female USA 16 Nora Generalao May 27 Female USA

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17 Dee Diaz Nov 13 n/a USA

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18 Lanell NeNe Barber Apr 11 Female USA

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18 Lanell NeNe Barber Dec 17, 2018 Female USA 18 Lanell NeNe Barber Apr 7, 2018 Female USA

18 Lanell NeNe Barber Oct 7, 2018 Female USA

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18 Lanell NeNe Barber Apr 29 Female USA 18 Lanell NeNe Barber Jan 12 Female USA

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18 Lanell NeNe Barber Sep 13, 2018 Female USA 18 Lanell NeNe Barber Sep 26, 2018 Female USA

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18 Lanell NeNe Barber Feb 25, 2018 Female USA 18 Lanell NeNe Barber Apr 14, 2018 Female USA

18 Lanell NeNe Barber Oct 17, 2018 Female USA

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18 Lanell NeNe Barber Apr 17, 2018 Female USA

18 Lanell NeNe Barber Mar 31 Female USA

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18 Lanell NeNe Barber Feb 23, 2018 Female USA 18 Lanell NeNe Barber Dec 15, 2018 Female USA

18 Lanell NeNe Barber Jan 20 Female USA 18 Lanell NeNe Barber Apr 14 Female USA

18 Lanell NeNe Barber Sep 28, 2018 Female USA

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19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Dec 21, 2018 Female USA, Ohio

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19 Sandy Meyers Reeve May 25 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Dec 3, 2018 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Nov 29, 2018 Female USA, Ohio 19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Sep 19 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Feb 22 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Nov 28, 2018 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Oct 28, 2018 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Oct 22, 2018 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Oct 6, 2018 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Oct 26, 2018 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Jul 30 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Jun 20 Female USA, Ohio

19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Jul 4 Female USA, Ohio 19 Sandy Meyers Reeve Sep 29, 2018 Female USA, Ohio

20 Theresa M Yore Dec 29, 2017 Female

20 Theresa M Yore Oct 23 Female

20 Theresa M Yore Jan 31 Female

20 Theresa M Yore Feb 1 Female 20 Theresa M Yore Oct 24, 2018 Female 20 Theresa M Yore Mar 18, 2018 Female 20 Theresa M Yore Mar 15, 2018 Female 20 Theresa M Yore Mar 8, 2018 Female

20 Theresa M Yore Nov 11, 2017 Female

20 Theresa M Yore Oct 27, 2017 Female 20 Theresa M Yore Oct 4, 2017 Female

20 Theresa M Yore Oct 3, 2017 Female 21 Michelle Bell Feb 11, 2018 Female UK

21 Michelle Bell Feb 14 Female UK

21 Michelle Bell Apr 3 Female UK

21 Michelle Bell Nov 16, 2017 Female UK

21 Michelle Bell Nov 27, 2017 Female UK 21 Michelle Bell Nov 12, 2017 Female UK 21 Michelle Bell Jul 23, 2018 Female UK 21 Michelle Bell Apr 23, 2018 Female UK

21 Michelle Bell Jul 12, 2018 Female UK

21 Michelle Bell Feb 14 Female UK

22 Marcie Hop Jul 26 Female USA (WI) 22 Marcie Hop Mar 28 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Sep 29, 2018 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Jun 2 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Apr 5 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Jun 8 Female USA (WI) 22 Marcie Hop Jul 5 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Mar 9, 2018 Female USA (WI) 22 Marcie Hop Jun 13, 2018 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop May 1, 2018 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Jul 14 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Jan 24 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Jul 29, 2018 Female USA (WI) 22 Marcie Hop Dec 29, 2017 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Jan 19 Female USA (WI) 22 Marcie Hop Aug 28, 2018 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop May 27, 2018 Female USA (WI)

22 Marcie Hop Mar 23, 2018 Female USA (WI)

23 Joan Millar Jun 24 Female

23 Joan Millar Jan 8 Female

23 Joan Millar Dec 29, 2018 Female

23 Joan Millar Jan 18 Female

23 Joan Millar Dec 31, 2018 Female 23 Joan Millar Nov 15, 2018 Female 23 Joan Millar Nov 12, 2018 Female

23 Joan Millar Nov 10, 2018 Female

23 Joan Millar May 14 Female

23 Joan Millar Nov 6, 2018 Female

23 Joan Millar Nov 9, 2018 Female

23 Joan Millar Jan 8 Female 23 Joan Millar Aug 3 Female

23 Joan Millar Nov 8, 2018 Female

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Feb 11, 2018 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Feb 6, 2018 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Jan 15, 2018 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Dec 22, 2017 Female USA 24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Jan 28, 2018 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Jan 25, 2018 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Dec 22, 2017 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Jun 9 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger May 13 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Feb 12, 2018 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Jan 29, 2018 Female USA 24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Feb 4, 2018 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Feb 2, 2018 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Jul 19 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Jul 16 Female USA 24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Jun 12 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Jan 16, 2018 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Dec 18, 2017 Female USA

24 Theresa Erbe-Neuberger Aug 26 Female USA 25 LaToshia Swann December 7, 2018 Female 25 LaToshia Swann February 17 Female

25 LaToshia Swann January 7 Female

25 LaToshia Swann March 20 Female

25 LaToshia Swann February 6 Female 25 LaToshia Swann March 28 Female

25 LaToshia Swann November 4 at 2:44 AM Female

25 LaToshia Swann September 27 Female

25 LaToshia Swann July 6 Female

25 LaToshia Swann December 12, 2018 Female 25 LaToshia Swann November 25, 2018 Female

25 LaToshia Swann March 10 Female

25 LaToshia Swann July 21 Female 25 LaToshia Swann July 18 Female

25 LaToshia Swann May 5 Female

25 LaToshia Swann March 26 Female 25 LaToshia Swann January 29 Female

25 LaToshia Swann January 27 Female

25 LaToshia Swann January 24 Female 25 LaToshia Swann December 31, 2018 Female

25 LaToshia Swann November 25, 2018 Female

25 LaToshia Swann November 20, 2018 Female 25 LaToshia Swann September 23 Female 25 LaToshia Swann August 8 Female

26 Lora Pennington March 27, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington February 20, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington May 2, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington March 20, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington November 2 at 10:44 PM Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington March 2 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington August 28, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington August 9, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington June 14, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington March 30, 2018 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington March 16, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington July 1, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington January 3 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington October 24, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington August 22 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington February 6 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington February 2 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington August 4, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington May 29, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington January 23, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington September 5, 2017 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington May 30, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington May 6, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington September 9, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington April 8, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington March 23, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington March 7, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington September 15, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington May 22, 2017 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington December 17, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington November 1, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington July 31, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington February 12 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington August 23, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington April 27, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington February 14, 2018 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington August 7, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington July 3, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington November 15, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington May 25, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington May 6, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington May 3, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington January 3, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington December 30, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington June 18, 2017 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington May 15, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington August 27, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington May 11, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington December 20, 2017 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington August 24, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington July 23, 2017 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington July 16, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington June 3 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington August 6, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington July 27, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington December 25, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington November 8 at 2:19 AM Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington May 6 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington March 5 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington May 27, 2018 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington April 10, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington November 21, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington September 11, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington June 13, 2017 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington June 19, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington April 21 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington March 22 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington July 20, 2018 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington March 7, 2018 Female USA (Washington) 26 Lora Pennington December 29, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington October 28, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington July 5, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

26 Lora Pennington April 8, 2017 Female USA (Washington)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi May 6 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi December 7, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi October 2, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi January 8 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi November 3, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi July 11 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi April 2 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi December 23, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi November 9, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi January 10 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi December 2, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi October 10, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi September 24 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi April 15 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi April 3 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi November 5 at 4:49 AM Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi September 25 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi September 11 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi August 1 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi March 6 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi January 14 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi December 7, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi December 7, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi December 5, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi December 2, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi November 20, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi September 13, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi September 12, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi September 11, 2018 Female USA (New Hampshire) 27 Debra Chesley Selmi September 15 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi July 24 Female USA (New Hampshire)

27 Debra Chesley Selmi April 22 Female USA (New Hampshire)

28 Beverly Parsons November 23, 2018 Female USA (California)

28 Beverly Parsons August 7, 2018 Female USA (California)

28 Beverly Parsons July 19 Female USA (California) 28 Beverly Parsons June 20 Female USA (California)

28 Beverly Parsons April 7 Female USA (California)

28 Beverly Parsons September 12, 2018 Female USA (California)

28 Beverly Parsons September 27 Female USA (California)

28 Beverly Parsons April 9 Female USA (California)

28 Beverly Parsons March 12 Female USA (California)

28 Beverly Parsons August 20, 2018 Female USA (California)

29 Denise Swanson June 11 Female

29 Denise Swanson June 14, 2018 Female 29 Denise Swanson November 10 at 11:47 PMFemale 29 Denise Swanson April 17 Female

29 Denise Swanson April 22 Female 29 Denise Swanson June 26, 2018 Female 29 Denise Swanson June 26, 2018 Female

29 Denise Swanson December 11, 2018 Female 29 Denise Swanson March 17 Female

29 Denise Swanson June 12, 2018 Female

29 Denise Swanson June 16, 2018 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley November 3 at 4:20 PM Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley October 6 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley August 27 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley August 27, 2018 Female 30 Cynthia Flores Stanley March 19 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley August 16, 2018 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley September 23, 2018 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley November 9 at 9:07 PM Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley September 27 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley September 26 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley October 10 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley December 14, 2018 Female

30 Cynthia Flores Stanley July 28, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 18 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorAugust 19, 2018 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 10, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 8, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 26 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJanuary 24 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 11 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 18 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorDecember 6, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 18 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 22 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorAugust 12, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 8 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorOctober 6 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 27 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 22 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 29 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 14 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 10 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 5 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorApril 24 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorApril 24 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMarch 24 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorFebruary 27 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 18, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 19 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 19 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 13 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 20 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMarch 25 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMarch 19 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorOctober 23, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 4, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorAugust 18, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorNovember 1 at 4:17 PM Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 19 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 17 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 11 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 10 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorAugust 22 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorAugust 3 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 6 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 26 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 23 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 19 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 9 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 19 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 10 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 1 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorApril 27 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMarch 29 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 28, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorFebruary 9 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorFebruary 8 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorNovember 3 at 8:46 PM Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorOctober 24, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 25 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 19 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 19 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorApril 24 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorOctober 27, 2018 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorSeptember 15, 2018 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorAugust 12, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorOctober 9 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorFebruary 20 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorDecember 27, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorDecember 24, 2018 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorDecember 18, 2018 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorDecember 10, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorOctober 16, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorApril 3 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 19, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 18 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorAugust 28, 2018 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 16 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJuly 3 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 27 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorJune 23 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 11 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMay 10 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorApril 23 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorApril 20 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorMarch 17 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorFebruary 27 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorOctober 10, 2018 Female

31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorAugust 24, 2018 Female 31 Francelia Lynn Baker TrevorApril 14, 2018 Female

32 Sharon Robertson July 3, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson April 28 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson May 5, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson March 18, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson January 11, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson November 12 at 12:49 AMFemale USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson November 12 at 12:43 AMFemale USA (Texas) 32 Sharon Robertson June 24, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson January 8, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson January 24, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson June 8, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 32 Sharon Robertson January 30, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 32 Sharon Robertson May 12 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson July 5, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson March 18, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 32 Sharon Robertson February 13, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 32 Sharon Robertson December 29, 2017 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson August 6, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson February 11, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson October 22 at 1:00 PM Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson October 13 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson July 29, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 32 Sharon Robertson July 26, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson April 25, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

32 Sharon Robertson April 10, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

33 Maurice Tobey June 23 Female

33 Maurice Tobey February 7 Female

33 Maurice Tobey October 6, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 14, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 6, 2018 Female 33 Maurice Tobey October 24 at 5:56 PM Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 7 Female

33 Maurice Tobey July 19 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 11 Female

33 Maurice Tobey November 12 at 4:56 PM Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 19 Female 33 Maurice Tobey February 10 Female

33 Maurice Tobey November 8 at 4:50 AM Female

33 Maurice Tobey May 20 Female

33 Maurice Tobey February 12 Female

33 Maurice Tobey January 22 Female

33 Maurice Tobey October 17, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 29, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 26, 2018 Female 33 Maurice Tobey July 27, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey December 7, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey July 27, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey October 19, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey October 19, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey July 19, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey October 31, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey January 15 Female 33 Maurice Tobey September 1, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey May 6, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey February 6 Female

33 Maurice Tobey January 20 Female

33 Maurice Tobey January 16 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 4, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey May 7, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey March 19, 2018 Female 33 Maurice Tobey January 14 Female

33 Maurice Tobey December 19, 2017 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 1, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey January 18 Female

33 Maurice Tobey November 5, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey October 23, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 30, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 5, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey December 20, 2017 Female

33 Maurice Tobey January 23 Female 33 Maurice Tobey January 1 Female

33 Maurice Tobey August 15, 2018 Female

33 Maurice Tobey July 28, 2018 Female

34 Anne Tomaszewski Aug 8, 2018 Female

34 Anne Tomaszewski Dec 22, 2018 Female

34 Anne Tomaszewski May 1 Female

34 Anne Tomaszewski Jul 1, 2018 Female

34 Anne Tomaszewski Apr 24 Female

34 Anne Tomaszewski Feb 15 Female 34 Anne Tomaszewski Dec 22, 2018 Female

34 Anne Tomaszewski Sep 10, 2018 Female 34 Anne Tomaszewski May 17, 2018 Female

34 Anne Tomaszewski Jun 11, 2018 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker June 4, 2018 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker May 17 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker April 14 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker November 7 at 5:00 PM Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker October 15 at 3:03 PM Female 35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker January 14 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker October 22, 2018 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker July 9, 2018 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker July 9, 2018 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker July 4, 2018 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker June 19, 2018 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker May 17, 2018 Female 35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker April 6, 2018 Female

35 Chloe Elizabeth Walker June 25 Female

36 Jason Schembri April 26 Male USA (California)

36 Jason Schembri August 6, 2018 Male

36 Jason Schembri April 29 Male USA (California) 36 Jason Schembri October 2 Male USA (California)

36 Jason Schembri May 12 Male USA (California) 36 Jason Schembri October 21, 2018 Male USA (California)

36 Jason Schembri October 20, 2018 Male USA (California) 36 Jason Schembri September 8 Male USA (California) 36 Jason Schembri May 7 Male USA (California) 36 Jason Schembri September 10, 2018 Male USA (California)

36 Jason Schembri September 3 Male USA (California) 36 Jason Schembri April 29 Male USA (California) 36 Jason Schembri November 5 at 8:48 PM Male USA (California) 36 Jason Schembri July 20 Male USA (California)

37 Phil Orr October 21 at 4:12 AM Male

37 Phil Orr June 2 Male

37 Phil Orr August 27 Male 37 Phil Orr July 21 Male

37 Phil Orr June 13 Male

37 Phil Orr May 30 Male

37 Phil Orr May 24 Male

37 Phil Orr May 18 Male

37 Phil Orr May 4 Male 37 Phil Orr March 30 Male

37 Phil Orr September 29 Male

37 Phil Orr June 28 Male

37 Phil Orr May 14 Male

37 Phil Orr May 12 Male

37 Phil Orr May 10 Male 37 Phil Orr April 7, 2018 Male

37 Phil Orr May 20 Male

38 Denise Walsh September 9 Female

38 Denise Walsh November 8, 2018 Female

38 Denise Walsh August 2 Female

38 Denise Walsh March 27, 2018 Female

38 Denise Walsh September 13, 2018 Female

38 Denise Walsh April 2, 2018 Female

38 Denise Walsh November 4 at 6:18 PM Female

38 Denise Walsh September 21, 2018 Female 38 Denise Walsh November 13 at 9:25 AM Female

38 Denise Walsh March 14 Female

39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokMarch 21 Female 39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokMay 9 Female 39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokMarch 18 Female

39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokJanuary 30 Female 39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokJanuary 20 Female 39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokJanuary 30 Female

39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokMay 8 Female

39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokJanuary 19 Female 39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokApril 19 Female 39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokMarch 18 Female

39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokJanuary 29 Female

39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokMay 9 Female

39 Tara-Yostina Elizabeth StokMay 8 Female

40 Michael Sharlow May 18, 2018 Male USA (Florida)

40 Michael Sharlow May 18 Male USA (Florida) 40 Michael Sharlow December 25, 2018 Male USA (Florida)

40 Michael Sharlow February 24 Male USA (Florida) 40 Michael Sharlow February 22 Male USA (Florida) 40 Michael Sharlow December 23, 2018 Male USA (Florida)

40 Michael Sharlow July 5, 2018 Male USA (Florida)

40 Michael Sharlow September 1, 2018 Male USA (Florida) 40 Michael Sharlow February 21 Male USA (Florida)

40 Michael Sharlow December 19, 2018 Male USA (Florida)

40 Michael Sharlow May 7, 2018 Male USA (Florida)

40 Michael Sharlow May 18, 2018 Male USA (Florida)

41 Bill Whitfield July 11 Male USA (North Carolina) 41 Bill Whitfield August 17 Male USA (North Carolina) 41 Bill Whitfield July 8 Male USA (North Carolina)

41 Bill Whitfield August 21 Male USA (North Carolina)

41 Bill Whitfield November 8 at 3:04 AM Male USA (North Carolina)

41 Bill Whitfield September 6 Male USA (North Carolina) 41 Bill Whitfield July 16 Male USA (North Carolina)

41 Bill Whitfield July 6 Male USA (North Carolina)

41 Bill Whitfield June 30 Male USA (North Carolina) 41 Bill Whitfield November 13 at 9:57 PM Male USA (North Carolina)

41 Bill Whitfield August 19 Male USA (North Carolina)

41 Bill Whitfield July 30 Male USA (North Carolina)

42 Lissa Simpson September 25 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson October 8 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson September 21 Female USA (Isaho) 42 Lissa Simpson August 20 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson August 18 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson August 8 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson June 25 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson May 29 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson June 21 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson October 7 Female USA (Isaho) 42 Lissa Simpson July 16 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson July 9 Female USA (Isaho)

42 Lissa Simpson July 6 Female USA (Isaho)

43 Suzanne Thelwell November 7 at 6:57 AM Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell October 25, 2018 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell January 24 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell November 27, 2018 Female UK 43 Suzanne Thelwell July 11, 2018 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell May 13 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell March 23 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell March 1 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell February 13 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell September 11 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell June 13 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell June 9 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell March 21 Female UK 43 Suzanne Thelwell February 13 Female UK 43 Suzanne Thelwell November 25, 2018 Female UK 43 Suzanne Thelwell October 24, 2018 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell October 5, 2018 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell July 25, 2018 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell July 15, 2018 Female UK

43 Suzanne Thelwell February 11 Female UK

44 Tanya Spiegel June 21 Female

44 Tanya Spiegel November 3 at 10:57 AM Female

44 Tanya Spiegel June 26 Female

44 Tanya Spiegel May 19 Female

44 Tanya Spiegel May 21 Female 44 Tanya Spiegel April 10 Female

44 Tanya Spiegel March 25 Female

44 Tanya Spiegel March 23 Female

44 Tanya Spiegel March 19 Female 44 Tanya Spiegel March 19 Female 45 Joanne Richards April 21 Female UK

45 Joanne Richards April 7 Female UK

45 Joanne Richards April 20 Female UK

45 Joanne Richards September 28 Female UK

45 Joanne Richards August 31 Female UK

45 Joanne Richards May 1 Female UK

45 Joanne Richards September 9 Female UK 45 Joanne Richards June 3 Female UK 45 Joanne Richards June 27 Female UK

45 Joanne Richards April 28 Female UK

46 Hope Sleight October 8, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 26, 2018 Female 46 Hope Sleight October 29, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 30, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 6, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight November 22, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 24, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 18, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 16, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 9, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 28, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 26, 2018 Female 46 Hope Sleight December 17, 2018 Female

46 Hope Sleight October 12, 2018 Female

47 John Singley July 14, 2018 Male

47 John Singley May 8, 2018 Male

47 John Singley April 20, 2018 Male

47 John Singley September 8, 2018 Male 47 John Singley September 6, 2018 Male

47 John Singley August 1, 2018 Male 47 John Singley August 1, 2018 Male

47 John Singley April 19, 2018 Male 47 John Singley April 19, 2018 Male

47 John Singley April 20, 2018 Male

47 John Singley May 6, 2018 Male

47 John Singley April 24, 2018 Male

47 John Singley April 19, 2018 Male 47 John Singley September 6, 2018 Male

47 John Singley August 1, 2018 Male 48 Karen Parikh March 5 Female

48 Karen Parikh April 26 Female

48 Karen Parikh February 5 Female

48 Karen Parikh January 30 Female

48 Karen Parikh July 12 Female 48 Karen Parikh July 10 Female

48 Karen Parikh July 7 Female 48 Karen Parikh July 3 Female

48 Karen Parikh March 1 Female

48 Karen Parikh January 17 Female

49 Sharon Basner Oliver February 3, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver July 29, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver July 18, 2018 Female USA (California) 49 Sharon Basner Oliver May 4, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver October 5, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver March 14, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver January 9 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver March 6, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver September 29, 2018 Female USA (California) 49 Sharon Basner Oliver August 5, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver June 26, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver December 24, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver September 30, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver April 29, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver October 7, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver March 30, 2018 Female USA (California) 49 Sharon Basner Oliver May 25, 2018 Female USA (California) 49 Sharon Basner Oliver February 21, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver February 16, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver February 19, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver July 14, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver November 11, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver August 30, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver December 20, 2018 Female USA (California) 49 Sharon Basner Oliver July 2, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver December 20, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver December 15, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver May 14, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver January 16, 2018 Female USA (California)

49 Sharon Basner Oliver July 17, 2018 Female USA (California) 49 Sharon Basner Oliver March 23, 2018 Female USA (California)

50 Sharon Anne Stone October 23, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone August 20, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone March 22, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone January 3, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone February 22, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone September 17, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone January 22, 2018 Female 50 Sharon Anne Stone January 18, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone January 16, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone January 17, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone July 21, 2018 Female 50 Sharon Anne Stone November 26, 2018 Female 50 Sharon Anne Stone June 24, 2018 Female

50 Sharon Anne Stone September 3, 2018 Female

51 Carla Posey July 25 Female

51 Carla Posey September 8 Female

51 Carla Posey April 12 Female

51 Carla Posey February 16 Female

51 Carla Posey January 30 Female 51 Carla Posey February 1 Female

51 Carla Posey July 9 Female

51 Carla Posey August 3 Female

51 Carla Posey July 20 Female

51 Carla Posey May 7 Female

51 Carla Posey May 29 Female

51 Carla Posey February 14 Female

51 Carla Posey May 13 Female 51 Carla Posey December 10, 2018 Female

52 Melinda Tangen June 6, 2018 Female

52 Melinda Tangen February 6, 2018 Female

52 Melinda Tangen April 10 Female

52 Melinda Tangen July 1, 2018 Female

52 Melinda Tangen June 9, 2018 Female 52 Melinda Tangen February 8, 2018 Female

52 Melinda Tangen March 16, 2018 Female

52 Melinda Tangen June 28, 2018 Female

52 Melinda Tangen June 22, 2018 Female

52 Melinda Tangen March 12, 2018 Female

52 Melinda Tangen July 14 Female

52 Melinda Tangen May 20, 2018 Female 52 Melinda Tangen June 8, 2018 Female

53 Christine Tello July 10, 2018 Female USA (California)

53 Christine Tello July 5, 2018 Female USA (California)

53 Christine Tello July 28, 2018 Female USA (California) 53 Christine Tello August 4, 2018 Female USA (California)

53 Christine Tello August 4, 2018 Female USA (California)

53 Christine Tello September 1, 2018 Female USA (California) 53 Christine Tello August 6, 2018 Female USA (California)

53 Christine Tello July 15, 2018 Female USA (California)

53 Christine Tello July 22, 2018 Female USA (California)

53 Christine Tello June 27, 2018 Female USA (California) 54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti May 28, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti July 1, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti October 6, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti December 13, 2017 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti April 19, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti July 22, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti February 7, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti June 19, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma) 54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti June 20, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti April 29, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti October 3, 2017 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti February 4, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti September 12, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti November 27, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma) 54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti March 26, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti November 13, 2017 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti November 22, 2017 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti January 6, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

54 Jill Smolley- Triscritti July 12, 2018 Female USA (Oklahoma)

55 Paula Vaughn July 17 Female

55 Paula Vaughn August 30 Female 55 Paula Vaughn August 29 Female

55 Paula Vaughn September 12 Female

55 Paula Vaughn August 4 Female

55 Paula Vaughn October 25 at 4:25 AM Female

55 Paula Vaughn August 19 Female 55 Paula Vaughn September 16 Female

55 Paula Vaughn August 12 Female 55 Paula Vaughn October 14 Female 56 Ginger Storts September 21 Female USA (Washington)

56 Ginger Storts August 31 Female USA (Washington)

56 Ginger Storts August 18 Female USA (Washington)

56 Ginger Storts October 12 Female USA (Washington) 56 Ginger Storts October 4 Female USA (Washington)

56 Ginger Storts May 13 Female USA (Washington)

56 Ginger Storts September 29, 2018 Female USA (Washington) 56 Ginger Storts September 22 Female USA (Washington)

56 Ginger Storts February 5 Female USA (Washington)

56 Ginger Storts September 1 Female USA (Washington) 57 Ann Williams March 3, 2018 Female

57 Ann Williams October 26, 2017 Female

57 Ann Williams September 3, 2017 Female

57 Ann Williams December 28, 2017 Female

57 Ann Williams August 21, 2017 Female

57 Ann Williams July 4, 2018 Female

57 Ann Williams August 21, 2017 Female

57 Ann Williams November 2, 2017 Female 57 Ann Williams December 23, 2017 Female 57 Ann Williams September 21, 2017 Female 57 Ann Williams September 30, 2017 Female

57 Ann Williams January 20, 2018 Female

57 Ann Williams June 25, 2018 Female

57 Ann Williams August 15, 2017 Female

58 Tere Terrazas November 3, 2018 Female

58 Tere Terrazas September 1, 2018 Female

58 Tere Terrazas October 21, 2018 Female 58 Tere Terrazas June 8 Female 58 Tere Terrazas December 25, 2018 Female

58 Tere Terrazas April 7 Female

58 Tere Terrazas October 2, 2018 Female 58 Tere Terrazas November 6, 2018 Female

58 Tere Terrazas May 12 Female

58 Tere Terrazas August 29, 2018 Female 59 Eileen Silon December 24, 2018 Female 59 Eileen Silon January 19 Female

59 Eileen Silon December 18, 2018 Female

59 Eileen Silon November 26, 2018 Female 59 Eileen Silon May 21, 2018 Female 59 Eileen Silon May 28, 2018 Female

59 Eileen Silon March 12 Female

59 Eileen Silon February 14 Female 59 Eileen Silon February 24 Female

59 Eileen Silon May 25, 2018 Female

59 Eileen Silon February 2 Female

59 Eileen Silon December 26, 2018 Female

59 Eileen Silon October 12, 2018 Female 59 Eileen Silon January 6 Female

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60 Sharon Smith December 30, 2017 Female USA (South Carolina) 60 Sharon Smith January 24, 2018 Female USA (South Carolina)

60 Sharon Smith October 24, 2017 Female USA (South Carolina)

60 Sharon Smith July 14, 2018 Female USA (South Carolina)

60 Sharon Smith October 5, 2017 Female USA (South Carolina)

60 Sharon Smith February 12, 2018 Female USA (South Carolina) 60 Sharon Smith February 18, 2018 Female USA (South Carolina)

60 Sharon Smith December 11, 2017 Female USA (South Carolina)

60 Sharon Smith July 19, 2018 Female USA (South Carolina) 60 Sharon Smith January 2, 2018 Female USA (South Carolina)

60 Sharon Smith April 9, 2018 Female USA (South Carolina)

61 Brittany Reyes July 20 Female 61 Brittany Reyes July 3, 2018 Female

61 Brittany Reyes April 3, 2017 Female

61 Brittany Reyes March 22 Female

61 Brittany Reyes May 29, 2018 Female

61 Brittany Reyes December 10, 2018 Female

61 Brittany Reyes October 28 at 4:28 AM Female

61 Brittany Reyes May 12 Female

61 Brittany Reyes April 19 Female 61 Brittany Reyes August 1, 2018 Female

61 Brittany Reyes June 29, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber June 7, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber July 6, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber August 18, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber June 29, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber March 6 Female

62 Bettie Sparber June 2, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber September 17, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber May 15, 2018 Female 62 Bettie Sparber November 1, 2018 Female 62 Bettie Sparber January 6 Female

62 Bettie Sparber October 6, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber August 6, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber May 9, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber June 18, 2018 Female

62 Bettie Sparber September 16, 2018 Female

63 Nancy Olivo June 21, 2018 Female 63 Nancy Olivo August 4, 2018 Female 63 Nancy Olivo June 2, 2018 Female 63 Nancy Olivo November 15, 2018 Female

63 Nancy Olivo February 7 Female 63 Nancy Olivo February 7, 2018 Female 63 Nancy Olivo March 19 Female

63 Nancy Olivo May 2, 2018 Female 63 Nancy Olivo January 29 Female 63 Nancy Olivo November 8, 2018 Female

63 Nancy Olivo July 19, 2018 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds June 15 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds October 3 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds November 12, 2018 Female 64 Cathy Reynolds December 4, 2018 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds May 21 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds April 11 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds February 15 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds November 12, 2018 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds April 5 Female 64 Cathy Reynolds September 10 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds August 12 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds May 27 Female

64 Cathy Reynolds March 15 Female

65 Charity Yoder-Smith December 10, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith November 3, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith November 18, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota) 65 Charity Yoder-Smith August 8, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith December 14, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith November 18, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith December 18, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith August 28, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith February 5, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith November 21, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith September 6, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith January 15, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith October 3, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith October 4, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith January 21, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith February 13, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith October 31, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith August 23, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith December 26, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota) 65 Charity Yoder-Smith August 8, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith September 13, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith October 5, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

65 Charity Yoder-Smith January 30, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

66 Jann Magee Turman September 20, 2018 Female

66 Jann Magee Turman August 29, 2018 Female

66 Jann Magee Turman September 20, 2018 Female

66 Jann Magee Turman September 4, 2018 Female

66 Jann Magee Turman September 12, 2018 Female

66 Jann Magee Turman August 30, 2018 Female 66 Jann Magee Turman September 23, 2018 Female

66 Jann Magee Turman August 30, 2018 Female

66 Jann Magee Turman August 30, 2018 Female 66 Jann Magee Turman September 29, 2018 Female

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66 Jann Magee Turman September 2, 2018 Female 66 Jann Magee Turman August 31, 2018 Female

66 Jann Magee Turman September 5, 2018 Female 66 Jann Magee Turman August 30, 2018 Female

67 Sheila Walter April 2, 2018 Female USA (Colorado)

67 Sheila Walter July 20, 2018 Female USA (Colorado)

67 Sheila Walter December 16, 2017 Female USA (Colorado)

67 Sheila Walter March 13, 2018 Female USA (Colorado) 67 Sheila Walter January 2, 2018 Female USA (Colorado)

67 Sheila Walter September 3, 2018 Female USA (Colorado)

67 Sheila Walter September 8, 2018 Female USA (Colorado)

67 Sheila Walter October 26, 2018 Female USA (Colorado)

67 Sheila Walter April 25, 2018 Female USA (Colorado) 67 Sheila Walter August 14, 2018 Female USA (Colorado)

68 Deblen Oke June 2, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke March 19, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke March 19, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke June 4, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke March 21, 2018 Female

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68 Deblen Oke June 8, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke June 2, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke February 4 Female

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68 Deblen Oke July 20 Female

68 Deblen Oke January 25 Female

68 Deblen Oke July 1 Female

68 Deblen Oke May 24, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke October 1, 2018 Female 68 Deblen Oke December 12, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke April 1, 2018 Female 68 Deblen Oke March 17, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke August 5, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke March 15, 2018 Female

68 Deblen Oke January 17 Female

69 Heidi Shepherd March 7 Female

69 Heidi Shepherd July 11 Female

69 Heidi Shepherd February 12 Female

69 Heidi Shepherd January 21 Female 69 Heidi Shepherd February 27 Female

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69 Heidi Shepherd April 27 Female

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69 Heidi Shepherd January 25 Female

69 Heidi Shepherd January 9 Female

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69 Heidi Shepherd July 19 Female

69 Heidi Shepherd February 25 Female

69 Heidi Shepherd June 5 Female

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70 Diane Zarkie June 21, 2018 Female

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70 Diane Zarkie February 20, 2018 Female

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70 Diane Zarkie May 3, 2018 Female 70 Diane Zarkie March 20, 2018 Female

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70 Diane Zarkie February 25, 2018 Female

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70 Diane Zarkie February 17, 2018 Female 70 Diane Zarkie February 5, 2018 Female

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70 Diane Zarkie December 25, 2018 Female

70 Diane Zarkie April 12, 2018 Female

70 Diane Zarkie May 3, 2018 Female

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70 Diane Zarkie June 25, 2018 Female

70 Diane Zarkie May 6, 2018 Female

70 Diane Zarkie October 22, 2018 Female

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70 Diane Zarkie March 23, 2018 Female 71 Janet Witchoskey March 24, 2018 Female

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71 Janet Witchoskey April 28, 2018 Female 71 Janet Witchoskey March 22 Female 71 Janet Witchoskey April 1, 2018 Female 71 Janet Witchoskey June 30, 2018 Female

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71 Janet Witchoskey May 9, 2018 Female 71 Janet Witchoskey March 6 Female 71 Janet Witchoskey May 28, 2018 Female

71 Janet Witchoskey March 24, 2018 Female 71 Janet Witchoskey July 18 Female

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71 Janet Witchoskey April 23, 2018 Female

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71 Janet Witchoskey August 25, 2018 Female 71 Janet Witchoskey June 16, 2018 Female

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72 Mez Potter November 13, 2017 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter September 23, 2018 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter December 1, 2017 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter December 14, 2017 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter November 24, 2017 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter November 24, 2017 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter December 4, 2017 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter September 27, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter December 8, 2017 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter November 7, 2017 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter November 18, 2017 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter October 2, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter November 27, 2017 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter February 23, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter November 2, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter February 28, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter October 2, 2018 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter February 28, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter September 17, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter October 2, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter August 27, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter November 30, 2017 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter April 5, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter October 2, 2018 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter February 23, 2018 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter October 2, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter February 17, 2018 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter October 2, 2018 Female USA (California) 72 Mez Potter September 23, 2018 Female USA (California)

72 Mez Potter September 23, 2018 Female USA (California)

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73 Loraine Vines August 9 Female

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73 Loraine Vines October 30, 2018 Female 73 Loraine Vines March 3 Female

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73 Loraine Vines July 15 Female 73 Loraine Vines January 14, 2018 Female

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74 Patrick Trojman June 19, 2018 Male Canada

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74 Patrick Trojman June 22, 2018 Male Canada 74 Patrick Trojman November 21, 2018 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman September 18, 2018 Male Canada 74 Patrick Trojman July 14 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman March 8, 2018 Male Canada 74 Patrick Trojman April 13, 2018 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman January 8 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman November 29, 2018 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman February 14, 2018 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman June 21, 2018 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman April 25, 2018 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman February 23, 2018 Male Canada 74 Patrick Trojman March 11 Male Canada

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74 Patrick Trojman March 5, 2018 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman June 8, 2018 Male Canada

74 Patrick Trojman November 16, 2018 Male Canada

75 Cindy Hamilton-Tait March 21, 2018 Female Canada

75 Cindy Hamilton-Tait May 20 Female Canada

75 Cindy Hamilton-Tait January 12 Female Canada

75 Cindy Hamilton-Tait November 14, 2018 Female Canada

75 Cindy Hamilton-Tait August 31, 2018 Female Canada

75 Cindy Hamilton-Tait June 25, 2018 Female Canada

75 Cindy Hamilton-Tait January 23, 2018 Female Canada

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75 Cindy Hamilton-Tait November 13 at 2:53 AM Female Canada

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76 Linda Thornton October 11 Female USA (Illinois)

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76 Linda Thornton October 24 at 5:25 AM Female USA (Illinois)

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77 Verna Sorensen December 22, 2018 Female USA (Idaho)

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77 Verna Sorensen November 15, 2018 Female USA (Idaho)

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77 Verna Sorensen January 9 Female USA (Idaho)

77 Verna Sorensen November 11, 2018 Female USA (Idaho)

77 Verna Sorensen December 15, 2018 Female USA (Idaho)

77 Verna Sorensen November 13, 2018 Female USA (Idaho)

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78 Wendy Rodriguez September 2, 2017 Female

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79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer July 14, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania) 79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer April 3, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer October 20, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer July 22, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer June 13, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer June 10, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer February 6, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer March 28 Female USA (Pennsylvania) 79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer June 25, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer July 15, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania) 79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer February 10, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania) 79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer June 21, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer November 11, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania) 79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer July 29, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania) 79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer July 5, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania) 79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer June 3, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania) 79 Mary Beth Schmidhamer June 7, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

80 Cecilia Perez April 12, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez May 12, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez September 19, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 80 Cecilia Perez June 30, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez August 4, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez July 23, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez December 20, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez December 20, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez March 11, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez April 4, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez September 5, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez March 27, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez September 20, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez October 2, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 80 Cecilia Perez April 11, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez July 12, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 80 Cecilia Perez November 15, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez January 12 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez March 19, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez January 11 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez September 19, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez June 24, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez August 31, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez March 19, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

80 Cecilia Perez August 29, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 80 Cecilia Perez September 2, 2018 Female USA (Texas) 81 Beth Vilker Samreny May 1, 2018 Female USA (Florida)

81 Beth Vilker Samreny May 4, 2018 Female USA (Florida)

81 Beth Vilker Samreny April 29, 2018 Female USA (Florida) 81 Beth Vilker Samreny May 10 Female USA (Florida) 81 Beth Vilker Samreny March 27 Female USA (Florida)

81 Beth Vilker Samreny April 30, 2018 Female USA (Florida)

81 Beth Vilker Samreny July 28, 2018 Female USA (Florida)

81 Beth Vilker Samreny May 8, 2018 Female USA (Florida)

81 Beth Vilker Samreny July 3 Female USA (Florida)

81 Beth Vilker Samreny September 7, 2018 Female USA (Florida)

82 Doreen Pitera December 20, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

82 Doreen Pitera August 30, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

82 Doreen Pitera December 30, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania) 82 Doreen Pitera August 4, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

82 Doreen Pitera January 19 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

82 Doreen Pitera October 25, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

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82 Doreen Pitera October 10, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

82 Doreen Pitera September 8, 2018 Female USA (Pennsylvania)

83 Patty Dickson Poulin August 25, 2017 Female USA (New York)

83 Patty Dickson Poulin August 23, 2017 Female USA (New York)

83 Patty Dickson Poulin October 23, 2017 Female USA (New York)

83 Patty Dickson Poulin November 3, 2017 Female USA (New York)

83 Patty Dickson Poulin May 15, 2018 Female USA (New York)

83 Patty Dickson Poulin October 31, 2017 Female USA (New York)

83 Patty Dickson Poulin July 27, 2018 Female USA (New York) 83 Patty Dickson Poulin August 15, 2017 Female USA (New York)

83 Patty Dickson Poulin August 17, 2017 Female USA (New York)

83 Patty Dickson Poulin August 16, 2017 Female USA (New York) 84 Maribel Vazquez October 24, 2017 Female USA (New Jersey) 84 Maribel Vazquez October 31, 2017 Female USA (New Jersey)

84 Maribel Vazquez October 29, 2017 Female USA (New Jersey) 84 Maribel Vazquez April 11, 2018 Female USA (New Jersey)

84 Maribel Vazquez May 14, 2018 Female USA (New Jersey)

84 Maribel Vazquez November 12, 2018 Female USA (New Jersey) 84 Maribel Vazquez December 26, 2017 Female USA (New Jersey) 84 Maribel Vazquez November 16, 2017 Female USA (New Jersey) 84 Maribel Vazquez March 25, 2018 Female USA (New Jersey) 84 Maribel Vazquez December 14, 2017 Female USA (New Jersey)

84 Maribel Vazquez January 21, 2018 Female USA (New Jersey) 84 Maribel Vazquez August 10, 2018 Female USA (New Jersey)

84 Maribel Vazquez October 29, 2017 Female USA (New Jersey) 84 Maribel Vazquez November 2, 2017 Female USA (New Jersey) 85 Mary Zihlman April 12 Female USA (Texas)

85 Mary Zihlman July 19 Female USA (Texas)

85 Mary Zihlman January 4, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

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85 Mary Zihlman October 5, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

85 Mary Zihlman June 27, 2017 Female USA (Texas)

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85 Mary Zihlman December 23, 2017 Female USA (Texas)

85 Mary Zihlman June 21, 2017 Female USA (Texas)

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85 Mary Zihlman July 3, 2017 Female USA (Texas)

85 Mary Zihlman September 22 Female USA (Texas)

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85 Mary Zihlman March 19, 2018 Female USA (Texas)

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86 Cindy Schubert September 28, 2017 Female USA (Illinois)

86 Cindy Schubert October 19, 2017 Female USA (Illinois)

86 Cindy Schubert July 30, 2017 Female USA (Illinois)

86 Cindy Schubert December 17, 2017 Female USA (Illinois)

86 Cindy Schubert June 30, 2017 Female USA (Illinois)

86 Cindy Schubert August 12, 2017 Female USA (Illinois)

86 Cindy Schubert September 3, 2017 Female USA (Illinois) 86 Cindy Schubert September 21, 2017 Female USA (Illinois)

86 Cindy Schubert August 31, 2017 Female USA (Illinois) 86 Cindy Schubert October 16, 2017 Female USA (Illinois)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson April 3, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota) 87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson April 26, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson April 26, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson January 19, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson August 29, 2017 Female USA (Minnesota)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson January 9 Female USA (Minnesota)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson March 9, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson May 9, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota) 87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson April 18, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson January 6, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson January 31, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson November 17, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota) 87 Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson May 14, 2018 Female USA (Minnesota)

88 Carole Walker May 7 Female

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88 Carole Walker October 27, 2018 Female

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1 Text+Video Post content One of the things I really miss about my wife is her voice and conversation. She rarely talks now (stage 6, Alzheimers), just whispers the occasional yes and no. Thankfully she still has her beautiful smile Last night I heard her talking again but in her sleep during the night. Short sentences which I couldn’t follow but definitely her voice. Both lovely and heart breaking at the same time. She is still there somewhere imprisoned by this awful disease

When your wife goes into a short period of respite care and you photograph her glasses in case they go astray to help the staff locate them #Alzheimers Beautiful sunny day in the U.K. today but trying to get my wife out of the house into the fresh air has proved awkward. Finally managed it and I think she enjoyed it.

We’ve long known that sleep deprivation can cause cognitive and memory problems (thus it is used as a torture method). During deep sleep periods our brains often cleanse themselves of harmful toxins (amyloid etc) Maybe instead of chemical interventions we need early diagnosis of harmful sleep patterns to prevent the development of certain forms of dementia before the damage becomes irreversible.

Today I took the hands of the one I love and gently led her to receive bread and wine at church. The hands that took hold of mine at our wedding, presented me with our children in the hospital and which nursed me when I was ill are now unresponsive as the Alzheimer’s takes hold. But the privilege of placing into her hands the presence of Jesus in bread and wine, knowing that whilst I struggle, there is a greater power that holds her tight has made this a very special Easter. The kindness of the congregation after the service just added to the sense of God’s presence Have a special Easter everyone and never take for granted the gift of your loved ones.

Celebrating international women’s Day (with Dementia, notice of the researcher)

Carefully choosing a Valentine’s card with the right words inside for a wife who probably doesn’t really know who I am but continues to mean the world to me 樂

Risks of cannabis use for mental health treatment outweigh benefits. Some of us who have worked with cannabis users have been saying this for years, good to have some empirical evidence. Would have helped more to know what compound(s) of the drug cause most harm but am sure that will come https://www.theguardian.com/…/risks-of-cannabis-use-for-men…?

My wife is in the late stages of early onset Alzheimer’s. My own post surgery issues means I am required to take regular respite breaks. I always dread picking her up afterwards for fear of what might have happened. She has been four hours home and seems very content to be here again. I shouldn’t worry really When dementia wasn’t really understood and were locked away out of sight 樂

When we create memories for ourselves they can so easily be lost with the passing of years or illness, when we create memories with others they last long after we have gone or no longer remember There has been a lot of discussion about Alzheimer’s and the relationship between genetics (familial) and sporadic forms and possible treatments. There appears to be much misinformation around. This video is from a free online course called ‘Faces of Dementia’ and explains both the genetic research and current trials

Had a hospital procedure yesterday which has left me in discomfort and shattered. I just need to rest and sleep but as fellow carers will understand that just isn’t possible My lovely wife has been confused and disorientated by my condition but bless her she keeps coming up to me to pat my arm ❤樂 Having problems with sickness in the early evenings with my wife but she wakes up next morning having forgotten all about it and full of smiles. We never lose hope (research on Alzheimer´s - note of the researcher) Don’t claim to be a poet or literary expert but just felt the need to pen these words —————————————————— Sometimes friends say to me ‘I don’t know how you do it’. Because all they see is the caring and the duties that it entails

I see the beautiful girl I fell in love with. The wife who shared my successes and soothes me in my disappointments ‘We cannot change the cards that life deals us, but we can control the game we play with them’ - Cannot begin to express how proud I am of my wife’s work for the last 25+ years. (Link on BBC video about research on AD - notice of the researcher)

Thought the group might be interested to read how we as a family responded to the devastating impact of Alzheimer’s upon it and how this led to the identification of a rare inherited form of Alzheimer’s. Also explores the way this is shaping how we trial and develop new drugs

A neighbour tried to be kind by saying to me ‘one day she’ll understand all that you have done for her (my wife)’. This so upset me. I never want her to know/understand what I have had to do. She was (is) a beautiful wife who took great care of her appearance and the house and would be mortified if she knew. I hope one day she understands fully how much I love, respect and care about her but never what I have had to do. Do other carers of LO’s feel the same?

When technology meets Alzheimer’s

Music really calms my wife but she constantly wanders and so it has proved difficult to get her to stay in one place to listen Bluetooth headphones means she can both wander and hum to the music. Here she is listening to Roy Orbison

Have interesting games of ‘name that tune’ from her humming 樂 My wife has early onset (under 60 diagnosis) Alzheimer’s and although I had major bowel surgery early this year I still manage to care for her at home She has little communication skills now, wanders ceaselessly and needs help with everyday activities such as washing and dressing Occasionally though my beautiful wife breaks through, like the photo attached. Watching on TV a film we saw on our first date 40 years ago she snuggled into me and we cuddled watching it together. Our daughter snapped the picture through her tears

It’s moments like this when you know the caring is both worth it and important

My wife’s care needs are becoming more demanding as the Alzheimer’s progresses into its final stages樂 I thought I would find myself feeling increasingly frustrated and tired by her needs but am in fact filled with a tremendous sense of gratitude that this wonderful woman has been a major part of my life and a sense of privilege to be empowered to care for her ♥樂♥樂

Devastated Collected my wife after a 4 night respite care break (as encouraged by my consultant) and the deterioration is distressing She has an upset tummy I know but I fear this may be the point where she tips over into incontinence. She passed out on me in the early hours of last night after a bout of diarrhoea and I am dreading tonight Would value your prayers

My wife (stage 6 Alzheimers)periodically has short spells of vomiting. She is fine by the next day and carries on as usual (in her own way) and there is no sign of tummy bug or food poisoning

Wondered if anyone else has experienced this with LO’s and were you able to resolve it? It’s a year since my major surgery and my consultant and surgeon have instructed me that I must have a period of respite care. My lovely wife (stage 6 early onset Alzheimer’s) deteriorated so much away from her regular routines and I hate the hard work that is required on her return to settle her back. I dread finding out that she becomes incontinent over respite

After a talking to by my grownup children, I have accepted I must have a break but have said it can be no more than four nights away

I feel a mixture of guilt and fear after this decision. Do others experience the same angst and will it get any easier?

One of the hardest things as a carer is when you are unwell but the caring has to go on

Have terrible cough and cold (having to be careful not to strain my Stoma from surgery to remove colon 10 months ago). Wife with early onset Alzheimer’s oblivious to everything and her 92 year old mother (who I also care for) goes from fretful to forgetful and back to fretful every 20 minutes

‘Death warmed up’ sounds like a desirable health condition from where I am now 樂 So Moms new thing is to chew up food and spit it out rather than swallow it. How do I get around this? Anyone else experience this? This disease causes so much pain. I’m feeling lost. I miss chatting with my Mom. All she does is ramble and not make sense. My Mom had a good day today she was talking normal asking questions getting in the conversations & answering me. This disease amazes me it’s so unpredictable how one day I can’t get nothing but one or two words from her the entire day and she’s like a zombie then the next day she’s up & dressed, brushed her hair & doing dishes just like the old days. I’ll take a good day anytime I can get it but it’s just so confusing, I feel like it messes more with us the family than her. 樂 My Mom does nothing but sigh, over & over. It’s a deep sigh every time. Kinda seems when she does it a lot her mood changes to sour. Coincidental? Or something to it. When I start to hear the sighing I’m like oh no! 樂樂 ♀樂

So today my Dad finally said as Moms primary caregiver that he’s ready to find a facility for her, he’s been stubborn to this point. I’ve called places they all seem full, one place said if the doctor gets involved he can make it happen quicker. I’m looking for advice on what you’ve gone through in making the move happen successfully. What should I be doing now or what documents am I going to be needing?

I’ve always heard people talk about Alzheimer’s patients pacing but what my mom does is more than pacing. We put her in bed usually about 7:30 PM she stays in there for just a few minutes and then must get up and go down the hall into the bathroom 400 times between 730 and 10 PM back-and-forth back-and- forth. Sometimes there’s one minute between trips or just seconds I can’t understand it and I don’t know how to get her to stop. She’s not sleepwalking because sometimes she will say a sentence to you on the way by or she will turn all the hall lights on and the next trip turn them all out?! 樂樂 ♀樂樂 Lately when my Mom goes to bed she wakes up & goes back and forth to the bathroom maybe 60 times in an hour. Don’t understand why this has just started? 樂 This terrible disease is aging my Mom so quickly 樂 (comparing photo)

This is my Mom who is in stage 5 of this terrible disease. Picture on the left was July 2017 & the right is September 2018. I feel like it has just aged her so quickly & I’m struggling daily watching this happen. Every week she loses & forgets something basic this past week was how to brush her teeth & now she can’t sign her name anymore. This page is very helpful to me I don’t feel alone with this terrible disease. (comparing photo)

My Mom has Dementia & my Dad doesn’t know how to deal with it. I don’t know how to help him get through helping her. He was in denial for so long I feel like we wasted valuable time we could have been helping her. She is declining rapidly. Most days all I do is cry. This is the most unfair disease. 樂樂樂 So tonight you my mom was boiling a dish towel in hot water on the stove even stirring it with the wooden spoon

Sometimes I can’t believe this is happening! Of all the things that I thought could happen this was the furthest from my mind. I watch my mom every day lose another piece of the life she knew. I look around the house at all the things She decorated with her special touches and homemake crafts & it makes me miss her more and more and she still right there. Then I think this is where we are now she’s done all these things to get to this point to not remember or appreciate any of it, makes you wonder why we work so hard in life to end up like this. I hate this disease! 樂 My Dad is the main caregiver for my Mom with Alzheimer’s. She is starting to hit and scratch my Dad. I’m at a loss. How do we deal with this? My dad is 72 he can’t take a pounding. She has gotten so mean. Help I need suggestions. 樂 new find that meant no stress while showering and washing mums hair lol who knew the power of a joke nose 樂樂 (Video with joke nose) washing mum at bed time at the moment so she can feel like shes getting ready herself in the morning as she doesnt really know what to do anymore (shes forgotten ive done it by the morning and isnt best pleased with my dad helping her)after washing her tonight she started looking in the cupboards when i asked what she was looking for she said 'a proper' and handed me back the water id given her 樂 so i got a smile when i poured a baileys, mum said i should have money for washing and moisturising people and go around doing it and she will bring the baileys and pour them for people樂new venture :) mum has been really struggling with putting her bra on (and hiding that fact from me :() so ive found these as they are alot easier with front fastening thought id share incase their any good for someone else this chair is officially going everywhere with us, happy mum :) obvs may not be the same for everyone but thought id share just in case, mum hasnt been eating well for a while and just asks for coffee all the time, ive sussed that the problem is she cant think of the words for things or doesnt know what you mean when suggesting what she may like to eat, coffee it seems means thirsty and given a visual picture of food and drink choices has worked and shes eating better than in a long time so i made her a small visual she can carry with her $%&£ you alzhiemers you havent stolen mums sense of humour ♥樂 what does forgetting matter when your sense of humour still shines through 樂樂 not sure how i held the tears in but finished getting mum ready for bed, lately shes been struggling to string scentences together and at her recent dr appt she got quite stroppy with him saying there was nothing wrong with her, she grabbed my hand and said 'you do a great job, if you ever get this like me you can come to my house and ill look after you' 樂

animals are awesome mum never forgets this dog pia who comes to different dementia groups she goes to, she lights up as soon as she sees her and pia goes straight to mum every time 樂 well this evil disease may have stolen lots but its not got mums sense of humor, found this mask in the pound store she wore it driving around waving to people laughing her head off at their confused faces 樂樂the two men that had clearly been taking somethings faces were the best, i think they may give up drugs 樂樂樂 mum started the day yesterday upset and stressed and she couldnt say why, then we went out and she waved at a stranger and laughed her head off with his confused look so the beeping/waving game was born and its def. staying 樂 love it when mum lights up with certain things, her father was a policeman and i managed to get us a visit to the local police museum which is by appointment she loved it 樂 the woman there showed us everything he would have worn so mum recognised it and lit up 樂 got a fab story from alzhiemers society for my son that explains people with dementia having different clouds, frustrated, worried etc and that things like hugs and holding hands can get back their everyday (happy) cloud...this is what he did today when the train station started getting busy and worrying mum 樂 massive for him as he is autistic to recognise mum needed him to help and for someone whos not a fan of holding hands. still choked by this pic, my superstar 樂 love this boy so much my son and mum out for coffee today :) mum deteriorating alot lately, shes suspicious of everyone and on edge, our day out today was nearly over after half hr as she wanted to go but she agreed to an open top bus ride, so glad i got a video of this today, not seen her laugh like this in ages 樂 me my mum and my son have always gone away for a few days together in the school holidays as mums alzhiemers has got worse my son (who is very aware of the changes in mum as hes autistic) has been upset in case we cant do it anymore, not helped by me losing my driving licence due to epilepsy returning, i have never felt so anxious that someone would get left on a train platform lol but with nap and coffee breaks for mum we did it, my mum and son discovered a mutual love for penny slot machines and we had a fab time :) walk with mum today made me realise although shes at another stage and passed being aware of her alzhiemers shes no longer anxious and her smile and sense of humor is back :) positives pop up in the strangest ways x

me my son and sister enjoying coffee and dominoes with mum who has alzhiemers mum will never refuse going for coffee :) wishing mum a big happy birthday, alzhiemers being kind in a weird way shes 70 today but she told us shes 50 so we will go with that as long as shes smiling were happy love you mum xxx mum and dads wedding anniversary coming up so im going to do a photobook for her, love this pic :) (historical photo) its dads birthday and my parents wedding anniversary coming up, mum who has alzhiemers has no idea that it is, i will get something from her but want peoples thoughts dad wont expect she will remember is pretending that she did a good or bad thing? me and mum today, we nursed my nan (her mum) with dementia now she has it so im not enjoying seeing the similarities with how shes changing but today i bought her a book with the history of cardiff where she grew up and saw her the most animated and chatty i have in ages looking at the pictures and telling me all about the places :) best moment of christmas :) merry christmas all xxx a memory popped up from this time last year when her dr put mum on Aripiprazole and she ended up slumped in the corner or unable to walk far looking at this difference im so glad we took her off it, her memory may be worse but at least she has dome quality of life have been reading up about aromatherapy and alzhiemers so thought it worth a try with mum and thought id share, it suggests lemon balm to help with cognitive issues, peppermint to help with appetite and lavendar for agitation/relaxation/sleep. has anyone tried cbd oil? my sister finally being home longer (4 days in a row woop) and seeing how much worse mum is getting and now starting with 'its the meds, we need to see someone privately to change them she has symptoms from the meds this could be reversed, not helpful 樂 does anyone kbow much about test/bloods to see the likelihood of going on to develop alzhiemers/dementia? my sister says she wouldn't like to know but i think i would for the sake of my son and mum, nan (her mum) nans 3 sisters and two of their sons had different types of dementia so feel its high chance for us

Saw a display in our local alzhiemers group where they had asked people to finish the scentence "dear dementia...... who will join me in finishing that scentence and maybe a picture a way of shouting back at Hithe all #$@&÷€ thanks for that the is dementiaadd my mum and was spreading diagnosed some with positivity alzhiemers with lastlovely year, pictures..mines my nan passed in theaway comments 2 years ago through end stage dementia (vascular) her 3 sisters had it and my mums cousin so my mum has had bloods for genetics as apparently it going through families is uncommon (i didnt know that)results should be in april/may time then my sister and i have to decide whether we want to know if were likely to get it if anything genetic shows up with mum. Not sure if i want to know or not!

What would you do...as there has been so much dementia (mum, nan-her 3 siblings and two of their children all different types) my mums dr suggested taking bloods to check for any genetic issues going on we get those results tomorrow if something shows up with mum me and my sis then have to decide if we want to look further with ourselves not sure if i want to be prepared for me getting it or not

樂music is awesome love this pic 樂 alzhiemers might steal memories that mum is a nan and a mum some days but it will never steal how she feels about everyone, pics like this prove it, so glad i captured it. #nansboy 樂 #endalz everyone sharing their selfies with their LO are fab so i thought id start us all off, me and mum today :) get sharing yours 樂 how fab is this pic 樂 mum who has alzhiemers (on left) just handed it to me with a big grin and said friends 樂 it confirmed why i take so many pics lol keep taking pics people you never know how powerful they can be especially when you need it most #memoriesmatter:) 2 Funny videos, special effects sofware applied on the faces of the CG and LO mum has always been a character but alot was whispered to me for us to laugh now she just says it for everyone to hear lol, took her to the cinema yesterday, a screening for over 60's usually she may watch a bit, fall asleep, chat etc but yesterday was different 樂 i booked a film i thought was like a period drama but turns out it had loads of dodgy scenes, swearing (the worst ones)and mostly naked people 樂 mum laughed all the way thru didnt sleep once and on the way out the guy asked us did we enjoy the film mum doubled over laughing and said ive never seen all those bums 樂樂 for the rest of the day if she got a bit stressed all i had to do was say bums and she was laughing again 樂 so glad i got the film wrong 樂 mum has been enjoying jenga in some of the groups we have been going so we got one and wrote memories from years back on the bricks to talk about, she loved it 樂 3 years today we lost my nan to end stage vascular dementia love this pic of her and my son while she still knew us, little did we know then that just over a year later my mum (her daughter) would be diagnosed with alzhiemers and after relief that nan was at peace we would be starting the horrible journey again :( £@$& you dementia when mum starts getting stressed or anxious my son is there with hugs and she is better almost instantly 樂 hes autistic and seems to pick up on her starting to get stressed before its obvious 樂 so apparently the conversation i had with my sister about coming home more often to help out and see mum because she is getting steadily worse has been forgotten, im out of order asking her to put her partner 2nd especially for christmas because im living closer to mum and live with my husband and son and do what i want with my life so she should be able to aswell, yes working out daily life to have time everyday to wash mum is putting everything i want first 樂樂 and having to make excuses when mum asks when she will be home is just great , i used to think oh well her concience shell have to live with it but i dont even care about that, this is about mum, nothing else :( https://www.google.co.uk/…/Fighting-fit-how-table-tennis-he… have started taking mum to a local sports hall with my son, shes really enjoying it and shocked me how good she is at it even though in other ways she has deteriorated significantly, my son is also loving having an activity they can do together after lots she no longer does with us like before mum is deteriorating fast lately :( my sisters home tomorrow after not being home for 6wks..ive told her she needs to prepare herself for the changes..she told me my trouble is i need to look at the positives 樂樂 my son has been worrying alot about mum hes autistic so notices the changes in her even quicker than others :( and she has struggled with being out and about for any length of time, seems shade and taking a chair is the way forward :) smiles all round have been taking mum to a new dementia swim session locally, although she used to swim well at first she was terrified even standing in the water clinging onto me saying she was scared but got upset because she couldnt remember how to swim and wanted to be able to again..a few months later this is mums face after she just swam next to me the width of the pool no floats or anything 樂☺ ive been taking mum to a dementia swim session that started near us shes gone from terrified to trying to put her bathers on 6hrs early today we were there loads of others there one man with dementia maybe in his 70's was zooming down the giant slide with a massive grin on his face 樂 started taking mum to a new swimming group for those with dementia last week she was ok after a while but at first she was panicking said she felt scared didnt remember what to do in the water and went child like telling me she was scared after me giving her lots of reassurance and help she really enjoyed it so id hoped she would be happier this week only she went through exactly the same thing again until she enjoyed , :( alzhiemers sucks i know they will work for some but goes to show drs arent always right, this time last year mum had some hallucinations so they quickly put her on anti psychotic meds, she went downhill fast so we took her off. my fb memories just confirmed we did the right thing, 2 pictures same local show, on the right on meds and had to carry a chair everywhere with us on the left now off that medication, she has seen a couple of things but luckily reassurance is enough at the moment, i also found out that hallucinations can be a phase that passes, her memory has gone down hill fast she doesnt recognise me as her daughter but she is still smiling and happy to spend time with us so im going with that mum seems to be getting extra anxious and agitated about going home/not recognising her home even more when she has pain (awaiting outcome of xray of her knee) has anyone seen this? saw something white go into mums bathroom last night saw my sons reaction, he saw it too. as it did all shampoos etc got knocked over i asked my son what was that he said a white oval did it and hes seen lots of them up nans house before 樂 for the next bit keep in mind that mums alzhiemers is at a stage that she isnt aware she has it..mum says to morg dont worry morg people are sending those to say they love you because you are such a special boy and since ive been ill you always make me feel better 樂 this came up on fb memories today, cant believe how quickly mum has changed in only 2 years alzhiemers sucks :(

So after being told by someone today they saw mum and avoided her just in case they upset or confused her my sister and I are in agreement that it's time to get this out there to help mum. Some will and some won't know that mum has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer's, which means she is struggling with her memory, faces quite often look familiar to mum but aren't always quickly known. We've been here before with my nan and as we did with her we will strive to make sure mum is always happy and not anxious and we aren't going to let Alzheimer's isolate her, she's still very much the same Jan, mum, nan, Jp, mrs.n. That lots of you know. If she needs a small prompt of who you are when she sees you then mums fine with that, she has very much come to terms with the diagnosis recently and feels in a place where it's ok to share. Xxx think mums consultant thought i was making it up as apparently it shouldnt be possible but as mum is getting worse with memory, self care etc her hand eye coordination is getting better and better im on about the 5th person now (people weve known years/know mum well) who made a point to message me or come and chat to say how shocked they are at how far mum has gone and looking like the alzhiemers has aged mum, even had one long term family friend tell my father her daughters were really upset how shes deteriorated since they last saw her, my dad says it shows they care i want to tell then #$£% off dont need to hear it thanks..what do you guys think? Anyone experienced seizures with alzhiemers?my mums been having odd episodes where sounds like shes hallucinating (feeling down side of face, strong smell etc first they tried lowering meds but now their saying maybe seizures? Twice today my mum who has alzhiemers said she saw figures of people in old fashioned clothing stood in the street as we passed in the car and she said is he really there, there wasnt anything there has anyone experienced this? mums not recognised me as her daughter for quite a while now..shes had a rough week with extra agitation and confusion from pain. tonight we finally managed to get on top of the pain and shes much calmer she just hugged me said she loved me and said "im going to say now thats my daughter" and pointed at me 樂樂樂 my mum has alzhiemers, my son is autistic hes very aware of change and been very on edge the last few days i finally got the answer out of him what if my nan forgets who i am :( been through this with my nan (her mum) so i know i cant promise him she wont :( :( my son has been very worried watching my mum forget things hes autistic so notices even tiny changes and has worried she will forget him bless him, he did a pic of himself and my mum for a frame for mothers day i felt quite emotional that hes holding her hand like looking after her樂 樂 ive learnt to do indian head massage which helps alot when muns in panic mode, did it earlier and she fell fast asleep thankfully i caught this on pic as i have no idea where its coming from 樂 see the rainbow?just before a white feather floated past the window Warning... unpleasant post...

It seems like every day, at least 2-3 hours are taken up with dealing with Dad’s bowel issues and related major drama. Whether it’s constipation or diarrhea, washing him with his help (very much against his will), him getting angry at the staff at the nursing home, Mom dealing with him and losing her patience because it’s just too much, him complaining that he’s fed up dealing with having to go to the bathroom, diapers that he removes... it never seems to end. He’s been under the care of a gastroenterologist for a decade (before he became symptomatic of Alz) and we understand the medical issues. But it doesn’t solve the daily drama of dealing with all that 樂. I travel 600 miles round trip every weekend to spend two days a week with my parents, and it seems like BM issues dominate our entire family’s dynamics at this point. Dad is entering stage 7, spent 3 weeks in the hospital for bowel issues in August, and moved into a (very good) nursing home 3 weeks ago. Are we the only ones dealing with what feels like such an extreme situation? How do you all do it?!? Dad’s been in the hospital for 6 days now and barely eats - he might consume about 100 calories a day, if that. He complains that everything tastes awful, including things we’ve brought from home. He hates

Eureka... Boost chocolate pudding... he likes it... First thing he actually likes in 8 days of hardly eating anything in the hospital...

Dad had a good day. 樂 My goodness, we’ll take it…

The scene just now: Dad in his hospital chair, Mom and I sharing the foot of the hospital bed chatting with Dad. He keeps telling us how he loves each of us. It’s almost melodramatic, the way he keeps repeating it. But I’m grateful. He told me a hundred times today what a “wonderful nurse” I was, after I fed him and washed him and walked him. And then, in the span of one second, he becomes lost and says to Mom what a wonderful “son” I am. Mom was shocked, said, “What? This isn’t your son! Who is this?” I told her it was ok, he and I had a good three days and he was pretty good the whole time. He referred to me as “mister” twice, then, he was back to himself and called me by my name. 樂 ♀樂樂樂樂樂 Two days ago, Mom, Dad and I were discussing how we had to run an errand the next day. It was concluded that Dad and I would go while Mom would stay home. Yesterday morning, I woke up thinking “Dad and I said we’d go somewhere but where the heck was it?!”. Talked to Mom, she couldn’t remember where either. Dad woke up, and I thought I’d ask him if he could remember where he and I were supposed to go and why. He did, very clearly too. Of the three of us, he’s the one with Alzheimer’s 樂 He was pretty proud of himself! Having a frustrating (yet smiling and “nice”) conversation with Dad, trying to convey and discuss some very serious things, but knowing it’s all for nothing... He won’t remember any facts, but will remember the emotions for a long time. Plus - despite not remembering a whole slew of things, he remembers the WORST thing my Mom has ever told him, in a moment of anger 4 months ago. Everything else from the last 24 months is pretty confused for him, but that ONE 10-second sentence she uttered in complete frustration that one day is stuck in his emotional memory... 樂 I know this is still relatively mild stuff, and I know what direction we’re headed in. I know it and accept it, I’m not in denial. But man, does it ever suck...

Sometimes, you gotta chuckle a little... This morning, over breakfast, chatting with Dad:

Me: It’ll be nice to see Auntie and Uncle this afternoon. You haven’t seen your sister since October, except through FaceTime!

Dad: Oh yeah, that’s right, they’re coming over. Your Mom told me. They haven’t seen you in a while. They’ll find you’re all grown up.

Me: Well, Dad, they’ve seen me all grown up... I’ve been grown up for a while!

Dad: I wonder if you’re still going to grow taller.... Do you think you might grow another inch or two yet?

Me: Dad, I’m 48. I’m pretty sure I’m all done growing. 樂 pdate: We sprang Dad out of a hellhole of a nursing home last Sunday, but Mom and I knew that he couldn’t stay with her anymore. At 82, Mom is no longer able physically to care for him: he’s incontinent (U and F), requires a pureed diet (his dentures no longer fit), and he sleeps about 16-18 hours a day. No conversation to speak of, no ability to leave him alone at all. We looked into getting a hospital bed and assistance for personal hygiene care at home and respite care, but it’s all just too much. We brought Dad home Sunday; all was well, everyone was happy, Mom was optimistic (for what exactly?!?), yet I knew that home was NOT the answer. It’s been a hellish week but I finally found a solution yesterday. The LTC place that was always our first choice had ONE private placement bed (in other words, not subsidized in any way), and we got it. We’ll pay heftily out of pocket until eventually (we hope...) it becomes a subsidized bed (hard to explain Quebec’s system succinctly). BUT Dad will be 5 minutes from Mom, in a nice, clean, new facility, surrounded by professional staff and well supported and cared for. Bringing him there tomorrow will be heartbreaking, and Mom and I dread it. How did you bring your LO from their home to his/her new “home”...? Did you tell them? Did you just say “we’re going for a ride?” How does one do this...? 樂 樂 “The Great Escape” is how I will forever refer to September 1, 2019. On Friday, Dad was released from the hospital into a “transitory” long term care facility in my parents’ hometown in Laval (near Montreal, Canada). The way “the system” works is that through a social worker, we had made a request for placement while Dad was hospitalized, since Mom on her own was no longer able to be a full time caregiver, I live 550km away and visit every weekend but can’t be present all the time, and after an intestinal infection brought him to the ER, Dad was going seriously downhill and needed more care. The two facilities near Mom that we like (re: find acceptable) have a 6-12 month waiting list. So the practice is to find a bed in a transitory place until the preferred place opens up. Friday, Dad was transferred to such a transitory place. Mom went with him, and texted me that it was not great... A friend who accompanied them texted me that “it seems clean and people seem nice, but it’s not pretty”. I kept an open mind before my visit with Mom Saturday. By the time Mom and I left Dad Saturday night and came home, we both felt sick with worry, and wondering what the heck kind of hellhole we were leaving him in. This is NOT a case of us needing to get used to the idea, or to the place, or to the guilt of leaving him. This was an absolute realization that this place is hell. I do not understand how it “passes the test” and is approved by the Quebec Health Ministry. It is filthy, poorly set up, arguably unsafe, and far from comfortable. It’s a place where forgotten people are Need advice from (mainly) Canadian brethren familiar with “the system” for placing people in long term care (bonus points if you’re knowledgeable about the province of Quebec)... Dad left the hospital Friday and was provided a temporary bed in a long term care facility (“CHSLD”), while awaiting his permanent placement in one of two facilities we like. The “temporary place” might be for 6-13 months. It’s a shithole!!! No other word for it. Mom and I agreed tonight that we have to get him out of there ASAP (yeah, it’s only been 36 hours...), but he can no longer be cared for at home by Mom (and I live 500km away). I’m trying to think of all possible options: full time care at home (not easy as my parents are in an apartment in a retirement home); beg/plead with the social worker to find another temporary place ASAP even though we Got the call today from the social worker. Dad has a place in a long term care facility, starting tomorrow... We were expecting this, and yet, it feels very fast. Mostly, it feels so permanent and official: Dad won’t be coming home to live with Mom anymore... 樂 樂 樂 Short update: the social worker we met was kind, thoughtful, competent, and compassionate. I feel somewhat relieved, even though we’re now in waiting mode for a placement. It’s a brutal decision to make, but it’s inevitable.

Update: the 2nd social worker from this morning was really good, compassionate and understanding. He met Dad briefly after spending two hours with me (and Mom for a bit), and just introduced himself to Dad and inquired how he was. And now we wait for a place to open up...

Question at the end of a long read: Dad has been in hospital for a week now, and we finally met the hospital social worker two days ago, with another appointment today for an evaluation. Mom and I have made a request for placement in a long term care facility. He is no longer a "home case" for Mom. He is mostly incontinent, requires help for absolutely everything. He is still mobile, but after a week in hospital refusing to eat, he's lost weight and strength. The social worker told us they have to ask HIM whether he agrees with being re-located. He still knows Mom and me really well, and only knows living with my Mom, with me visiting and staying with them regularly. There's no way he will give consent to moving elsewhere, and this will precipitate a huge emotional reaction that will further traumatize him. Has anyone else dealt with this? We are in the Montreal (QC, Canada) area. This is how "the system" works here...

Dad pleading with Mom and me to take him out of the hospital. He’s in tears, won’t let anyone touch him, and asking why we don’t love him enough to get him out of there. F this f’ing disease. Dad is supposed to come out of the hospital today after a 36-hour stay for a bout of intestinal issues. Mom is his full time caregiver. I want to organize home care for Dad, because Mom won’t last. I can think of the immediate needs for help with showering (right now it’s a once-a-week battle with Mom to shower, plus daily cleanups at the sink by Mom). But - and I know this sounds naive - what other types of home care are available and what do people use? Dad is mobile (slow and often unwilling but able to walk), eats well (what Mom makes), but has bathroom issues. We are planning on having 4 hours a week of home respite so Mom can have some alone time (this will be another battle as he doesn’t want anyone but her or me around). He also goes to “daycare” 3 afternoons a week, but she ends up shuttling him and doesn’t get much rest from that. They’re both resistant to the idea of him taking adapted transport even though it’s available... So - I would greatly appreciate thoughts and suggestions based on your experiences... TIA. Those of you who were full time caregivers and eventually had to put your LO in a memory care unit, or at least bring in outside help into your home, what was the catalyst, or the “I can’t do it anymore...” moment or event?

Back to needing advice/suggestions... When did you know you needed outside help with your LO? And what was the first kind of outside help you got? How did you introduce it to your LO? Mom is Dad’s full time caregiver, but I just listened to her helping him shower (she is an expert, having worked as a geriatric nurse), and I just felt horrible for her... I don’t know how long she can sustain that kind of effort (she’s 81). He argued and protested, and kept soaping up every time she had him rinsed off, and then rubbing his eyes raw because he had gotten soap in them, and just generally giving her a very hard time... I understand HE is sick, HE has a hard time, HE finds showering difficult and uncomfortable and unpleasant. But I’m not willing to lose both parents to this disease.

The day started with Dad waking up, crying because he thought he was alone (Mom and I were 10 feet away in a different room), and asking to go home to the house. They moved from the house to the retirement home two weeks ago. I knew this was a likely scenario and was dreading it, but am still sad... It also means Mom is a prisoner because he refuses (is afraid?) to go out, or welcome her friends over. 樂 Sigh... They are now physically safe, but I’m not sure they can ever be happy again.

My parents' house is going up for sale later today, and they are moving into a retirement home in September. With all this turmoil and impacts on his routine, Dad is predictably more easily disturbed and even depressed. He's visibly declining these days. I had expected the move would affect him, but failed to anticipate just how much the current activities (pre-move) would upset him. I'm second-guessing everything I do, even though I know there is no right answer, there's just a slightly better answer... None of it feels correct.

We’re having the windows replaced in the house today. The guy is here doing the work. Dad is fascinated by it all, but wants to be social and chit chat with the guy. The guy is already running way behind schedule, and is, himself, very chatty. I keep trying to remind Dad to just let him work in silence, but so far, not much success... 樂 Working on mastering my patience. Diversions not working at all! My little family (sick Dad of 81, caregiver Mom of 80, and me - only child and feeling like a parent to my parents...) has had some tougher days lately, as we prepare to move them into a retirement home in a couple of months. It’s difficult emotionally to sell the only house they’ve owned. It’s hard for me to be the leader and the “weight bearer” and the referee and the thinker and the cheerleader through all this. I second-guess myself but can’t come up with better solutions. Dad is of course reacting to all this complexity and upheaval, and is behaving more unpredictably and harshly, and Mom is stressed out and exhausted and also responding very harshly to him. The two of them can barely stand one another these days. I’m living nearly full-time with them right now, but once they move, I will be going back to my home (6 hours away...). I’m the buffer and the referee and the relief for Mom, and for Dad. He can’t stay alone, so when he’s not with Mom, he’s with me. How the hell are they going to cope once I can no longer live with them “nearly full time”? I’ll be visiting often but I do need to go back home and find a new job - I quit mine in April to come take care of them and get them moved out of the house, but can’t sustain that financially forever... I hate this damned disease. I want my Dad back and my Mom happy again. My parents have lived in the same house for 47 years. Dad has AD and some vascular dementia, and has been slowly but surely declining, after an official diagnosis 15 months ago. I live 550km away, even though I’ve recently quit my job to spend nearly all my time with them. I’ve been trying for a long while to convince them to sell the house and move into a retirement home where they can have help and services, and not be completely isolated. This week, they signed a lease to move into their (Mom’s) first-choice place, with every one of their criteria met. They’ll be safer, I’ll be less worried, and they won’t have to maintain the upkeep on the house anymore. As Dad keeps declining and is more confused, I know very well that moving will be a big shock to him and he’ll likely take a turn for the worse. But staying in their house, even with help and with me having quit my job and spending lots of time with them, is not sustainable longer-term, especially not through another harsh Canadian winter. We’re all “happy” that we lucked out and got the place we all wanted. But now the thought that we’re about to sell their house (where I grew up) and I’m about to move them into a retirement home where my Dad will feel so lost, and Mom sad that she no longer has her house, is filling me with guilt, and just killing me... Am I just being selfish wanting to make sure they’re safe, even if it costs them some (few...) happy moments left in their house? Life as they’ve known it changed forever when Dad became sick, and I feel this move marks the true beginning of the end. Dad wanders at night at his LTC facility, searching for Mom. Not agitated or angry, but asking for her. There’s a code for the elevator, therefore he’s safely confined to his floor. However last night, he apparently snuck into the elevator with visitors who were leaving, and found himself in the lounge on the ground floor by himself. He did not leave the building and was safely guided back to his room by an employee. The nurse today suggested that perhaps he should wear an alert device that prevents the elevator from moving if he gets on, and that requires someone accompanying him to punch in another code to shut off the very loud alarm. Two things: Mom is stressed by the idea of having to punch in the code quickly while the alarm is going off every time they take the elevator together (daily), and she and I are both concerned about the stress that this loud noise will cause Dad on a daily basis when he is legitimately taking the elevator with Mom. I’m trying to think of a wrist band that we could put on him at night and take off while we’re with him during the day. But he’s clever so it can’t be something he would figure out in his Hi all, looking for recommendations for bracelet/watch with GPS tracker. I use a GPS watch myself for sports, but that’s way too complicated for Dad! What are the best ones for LO’s? Update: I need something sold and supported in Canada. It was such a good day until about 30 minutes ago. Then, s*** happened. Literally. 樂樂樂 Hi everyone, need some thoughts and experienced opinions... Dad is starting to sleep less during the night, getting up to go the bathroom a few times and taking longer to go back to bed (he starts his morning routine of putting in dentures and wanting to get dressed). Mom wakes up with him and checks on him, and often doesn’t go back to sleep herself. She is sleep deprived... I want to talk to their doctor and see what possible solutions (sleep medication or other) for Dad to sleep more soundly. But... Mom (retired nurse) doesn’t want Dad to be medicated and “out of it”. I’m also concerned that he would stop waking up to go to the bathroom and would become incontinent sooner. Caught in the dilemma of wanting him (and therefore Mom) to have better nights, but not sure whether “better nights” mean medication, incontinence and diapers (Mom having to deal with all that...), or, mediocre nights with frequent disturbances... We don’t feel it’s time yet for memory care or nursing home. Dad woke Mom up at 5am, saying he needed to use the washroom but didn’t know where it was, or “what to do”. Mom told him to get out of bed and pointed him to the bathroom, literally 4 feet away. He used it ok and came back to bed. This morning, he remembers clearly that he woke up lost and confused, and keeps apologizing to Mom for waking her up again. Mom is exhausted, hasn’t slept well in days (also dealing with her own health stuff). I’m staying with them for the holidays, but there’s only so much I can actually do to help each of them cope... I’m trying to take care of everything I can, but am feeling horrible that I can’t fix “everything” to make life easier for each of them. Plus the guilt of an upcoming trip that I’m choosing to do but will keep me away for a whole month is choking me... How do you all deal with guilt? I know I’m not the only one... For nearly twenty years, my parents and I have celebrated Christmas and New Years just the three of us (I’m an only child and single...). We used to go away on vacation but as of two years ago, that’s over. Dad is now sicker and it’s more difficult to do anything special. We have still planned a two-day “holiday” near their home, so we can get away and enjoy something special as a family. It might be the last Christmas that Dad is aware of. I am dreading it - I’m never a fan of the holidays to begin with... I’m expecting him to hate everything and complain, and that will be stressful and sad for all three of us. But Dad himself has been asking where we’re going and what we’re doing for Christmas, as he also wants something special. I feel like it’ll be hard and not very pleasant, yet, staying home is not an option. Mom deserves to get out and have some distraction, have some nice food that is a change from the usual routine, and *see people*, feel like she’s still part of the world... As for me, I’m just sad and stressed by this right now. Too many “lasts” starting to stack up. I’m taking care of myself - eating well, exercising and sleeping enough, but the emotions are still very intense. Anyone else feeling the stress of the holidays? Just gave Dad his Father’s Day present and he loves it! He understands it’s not a real dog, he knows it’s a fake, but he talks to it like it’s his old dog. The fact that the puppy barks and wags its tail in response makes him laugh. 樂 樂 Grateful for a good day. 樂 Dad participated in our local Walk for Alzheimer’s, completing the 1.2 mile loop without stops or complaints (he’s 82 in mid-stage AD, and struggles with walking more than 10 minutes at a time). Later in the day, I asked him to sign a card for Mom for Mother’s Day. He wrote the most beautiful letter to Mom, with very few mistakes, well written, and with incredible sentiment. His penmanship is still beautiful... It was Mom’s best possible present. And a memorable day for all of us, to compensate for all the bad ones... A heartfelt thank you to all of you who offered support yesterday after I complained that my birthday hadn’t quite gone to plan… Today’s my birthday. I’ve planned to spend this week and next with my parents, knowing they love being with me on my birthday. A few days ago, we planned an outing to go see the fall foliage up in the mountains, about an hour’s drive from their home. Dad was in a great mood until just before we left home this morning, but then had a turn for the grumpies. He was somewhat ok in the car, then kind of not. Once we got to our destination, his mood was “fragile” at best. He claimed to “hate” looking at the fall foliage because it all looked the same, he hated walking around, was impatient and unpleasant. He was then great over lunch, but after that, he was in a hurry to return home (“there’s nothing to do here!”). Mom and I did our best (Mom did better than me) to go along and not provoke more reaction. But in the end, my birthday outing didn’t live up to my expectations. I didn’t get to relax and enjoy nature the way I love, and didn’t get to spend the time I had so looked forward to spending in the mountains. In other words, it wasn’t as fun as similar outings in the past. In yet other words, this was another reminder that he’ll never be the same. And since it was on my birthday, it was more painful than most other days. Sorry for the dump of negative emotions and energy - this is pretty much the only place where I can share things like this. Ok. Time to turn the page, and express gratitude that I’ve reached this ripe old age and still have both my

Hi everyone. Curious what your experience has been if your LO has been prescribed Sertraline (Zoloft)? Dad is having such a hard time these days. The staff at the long term care (LTC) facility are trying everything they can think of to help him and make him comfortable, but he refuses to be touched, refuses to sleep in his bed, and is often found sleeping on the floor. He is verbally abusive to many, including even to Mom, who has nothing left to give at this point. I dread getting a call that he fell and broke a hip, or banged his head. I can’t bear the thought that my beloved 82 year-old Dad chooses to lie on the floor to sleep. This generous and loving, hardworking family man, who made so many sacrifices for me, doesn’t recognize that he can sleep comfortably in a bed, and angrily chooses to curl up on the floor. The guilt and pain and sadness at seeing him like that are endless right now. I love him and don’t want to lose him, but I don’t want to see him suffer like that anymore, and pray for a painless heart attack... 樂 樂

Edit: everyone suggesting meds... this is a facility that strongly advocates for no chemical (or physical) restraints and there is definitely a preference towards not drugging anyone. But I might have to insist. At the same time, I’m a afraid of how meds might make him react...

Edit 2: Dad apparently spent all Thursday night in bed and got a good night’s sleep. Heading there shortly, Dad’s been in LTC for a month now. He has good days and bad days. His second week, he stopped eating. We fretted and worried. He started eating again, voraciously, and is now even gaining a few pounds back. But now, he’s decided he doesn’t want to sleep. He roams his floor all night, looking for Mom. After two sleepless nights in a row, this morning was an absolute disaster. If anything, what does your LO take to help with sleep? We’re talking to the doctor on Tuesday, and I’d like to know a bit more. If CBD oil, what kind? I often see posts by members mentioning the loss of their loved ones, with a link to the exact same article about “signs of dementia people are not aware of”... I can’t tell whether this is click bait, or whether these posts are authentic. I’m sorry, but it’s hard to tell sometimes.

Dad attended his third weekly “party” at the local Alz Society. That’s what we call his Thursday afternoon activity group (adult day-camp). He LOVES it! He laughs and socializes and makes everyone else laugh with his antics. He’s always been a very social “life of the party” kind of person, and watching him become grumpier and more withdrawn has been heartbreaking. For the past three weeks, he’s been so excited to go and see his buddies, that it’s really been a complete relief for Mom and me to see him capable of such joy once again. Tremendously lucky to have the Société Alzheimer de Laval near us (Laval, Québec, Canada). It’s an amazing resource, filled with wonderful and caring individuals. 樂

Tonight, I’m in awe of my mother. She single-handedly managed to get Dad to agree to attend “adult day camp” one afternoon a week. He had steadfastly refused, obstinate and unpleasant and rude in the process. This afternoon, at our local Alzheimer’s Society, after much discussion, some tears and some very persuasive arguments by Mom, he relented. Afterwards, he was relieved and happy to have pleased us and given her the best birthday present ever: 3 hours of rest per week. 樂 My parents and I walked for the cause this morning, participating in our local Alzheimer’s Society Walk/Run fundraiser. Dad was happy to walk hand-in-hand with me for some quality daddy-daughter time... Mom got a chance to chat with friends and relax a bit for a change. I’m on my “second listen” of Joanne Koenig Coste’s “Learning to Speak Alzheimer’s”. I wish I’d read it (or listened to it) 3 years ago, but it’s still not too late. Highly recommended…

After seeing several references here to Teepa Snow, her website and videos, since joining this group, I spent a couple of hours last night watching. And learning... so much...! Thank you for telling me about her. 樂

Hi everyone. I thank you all for sharing your stories, your experiences and your knowledge. I’ve just recently joined, and already, I’m finding kindred spirits in this group. I wanted to let you know of the book “Feeding my Mother”, by Canadian singer and song-writer Jann Arden, whose Mom has advanced Alzheimer’s. I have found Jann’s book to be a balm for my own soul... She “gets it”, and she finds the right words to convey situations and emotions. Please note that I do not know Jann Arden, and I get nothing at all from recommending her book. I just found it valuable for myself, and thought I would share. She’s also on FB and Instagram, and posts frequently about her Mom. She - like us - can relate to our plight... I wish you all a good night, and a better tomorrow... 樂 Mom (caregiver) is really struggling with being patient, and with trying to control EVERY aspect of everything my Dad (moderate Alz) does, says, eats, watches, and thinks... I’m with them almost full-time this summer, and they argue constantly. She won’t give him an inch of autonomy, which of course drives him nuts. He does need a lot of guidance but he is not helpless and is “still here”. I’m trying to convince her to get help in the form of counseling and workshops etc., because she would benefit from it. She sees no point in it since it won’t “fix the problem” (which according to her, is Dad). My Dad is a not “a problem”. He’s sick... In the meantime, I’m constantly the referee and serve as the “therapist” for each of them separately. She’s a smart, educated and loving woman who is elderly and sad and exhausted... Her refusal to seek help for herself is maddening to me. And when I talk to her the way she talks to Dad, she bursts into tears and says, “don’t talk to me that way... I’m exhausted and don’t deserve that”. I agree, but neither does Dad... Anyone else dealing with that kind of situation? Do I just keep insisting gently that she should get help (it’s available and free...!!!), or do I just wait and let her reach rock bottom and see if she decides to ask for help

My Mom, who is my Dad’s full-time caregiver, continues to struggle with accepting the fact that he has Alzheimer’s. She understands it “intellectually”, she knows it, she’s a retired nurse and is knowledgeable, but she still has a difficult time *accepting* that he’s sick. She feels guilty for “not being patient enough”. I know she needs help - groups, counseling, tips & tricks etc, - all of which is accessible to her. How do I convince her that it’s ok to get help? (PS I would share Teepa Snow videos with her but my Mom only speaks French...)

Anyone dealt with a LO going into long term care who absolutely, adamantly and loudly refused to let himself be changed and washed by the (very professional and competent) staff and insisted on (still) having his wife do it? It’s only been two days so lots of adjustments and adaptation required, but Mom can’t help herself and jumps in to do it because she can’t bear to see him so agitated and dirty, and Dad continues to have a fit anytime an employee wants to help him clean up and wash him. Mom was exhausted and couldn’t do this at home anymore... but she’s still doing it now that it’s officially someone else’s job to do it.

As I read posts in this group on a daily basis, seeing questions or comments that remind me of how Dad was two years ago or even just last year, it strikes me just how far along he now is. We’ve been having a good day today, just him and me. He’s still in hospital, now just waiting for a place in long term care. Even hospitalized with no acute physical ailments at this point, it’s a full time job to feed him, give him his meds, keep him company, get him out of bed, sit him in a chair, walk with him, talk with him, reassure him, entertain him, have his diaper changed by the staff, wash him, put him to bed... it’s non-stop, even on a good day like today. I have NO IDEA how Mom was able to take care of him at home by herself for so long. He demands more care than he did even two weeks ago, but he was already a very heavy case.

Unbeknownst to me until recently, my Dad (who’s 82 and in advancing mid-stage AD) suffered a significant loss in his life when he was 20 years old. While his memory is gone and he doesn’t remember the actual loss, he is now often making vague references to a person who doesn’t exist but potentially represents this loss; he also has hallucinations in which he confuses the lost person with me (in some ways...). Has anyone else discovered deeply-buried family secrets as a result of weird “memories” by an ailing LO? Just curious really... Trying to process all this on my side... I just traveled for nearly a month, after spending the better part of last year helping my parents (Dad is in mid stages ALZ). I’m back staying with them this week. Dad has declined subtly over the past month and is grumpy ALL THE TIME; his cognitive abilities are down to next to zero, his memory (short and medium term) is completely shot. He’s upset and frustrated. Mom (FT caregiver) is exhausted, frustrated and a bit more sad than before I left... She’s also lost weight and is tiny. I’m starting a new job in two weeks, and won’t be able to visit more than 2 weekends a month going forward. I’m worried and sad, and can’t figure out how to help them anymore. It’s easy to say we need outside help and services, but everything’s a fight with Dad, so it’s exhausting to even try to plan and get help (and what help exactly?!?). Hard to come back from an amazing trip (which was also a fundraiser for Alz...) and come back to the reality of my parents’ lives. I know, I’m fortunate to have made this trip, I absolutely know how lucky I am. I worked very very hard to make that trip and fundraising campaign happen, but I’m still lucky to have been able to pull it off...

And today it happened... twice.

Dad asked me this morning, “I wonder when Hélène is going to come visit us”, while staring right at me. I smiled and said, “I’m right here, Dad.” He hesitated, half-smiled, then said, “I’m confused... there’s another Hélène...” I said, “Yes, that’s your Mom’s name too”. “Oh”, he said sadly, “I don’t think she’s going to come visit me...” My grandmother passed away in 1964...

Later, he told me again how much he liked his Fathers’ Day card, the one I gave him three weeks ago. He then paused, and looked at me with a very confused look on his face, and asked me, “and... you... who was your father?”. I told him that I was lucky that the handsome man looking at me with bright blue eyes was my Dad. I realized that confused him even more - I quickly told him he was my Dad. He softly said, “oh yes, yes...”. I said, “what matters is we love each other, no matter what”. He brightened up and said, “that’s for sure! Don’t you doubt that for a single minute!”

Today, my heart broke a little bit more... I want my Dad back... 樂 樂

I spend every second weekend or so with my parents (I live and work 600km away). Over my last 3 visits, I have found that Dad has declined so much, it breaks my heart. He recognizes me - but I can tell he won’t for much longer. He just asked me now whether I go by the name “Hélène”. I took it in stride and said, “yes, that’s right. You and Mom gave me that name, and I’m named for your Mom who was also Hélène.” He replied, “oh, that’s for sure, that was her name”. I’m wondering just how well he actually knows I’m his daughter. I’m an only child, and have always been close to both my parents. I’m not ready to be forgotten yet... 樂

I FaceTimed with Mom and Dad today. Dad was a bit off his game. Apparently last night he was so confused that he didn’t remember my name, and wasn’t entirely clear he had a daughter. Today he fully recognized me and was immediately thrilled to see me, but still had some confusion over other things. These episodes of total confusion are becoming more frequent. I’m away for a month on a once-in-a-lifetime hard-earned trip (and fundraising for Alz!), after spending 75% of the past year living with my parents. I’m afraid he might not recognize me or might be very confused about who I am when I come back. 樂 #IMissMyDad Dad moved to the long term care (LTC) facility of our choice yesterday. It’s 5 minutes from Mom’s, it’s probably as good as any nursing home/LTC gets anywhere in the world, if I were to guess. But Dad, Mom and I all feel lousy, sad, miserable. I smile and stay calm, cool and collected, I chat with him and hold his hand and give him hugs and kisses. Dad keeps telling Mom and me that he loves us and doesn’t want to lose us, and doesn’t want to be in that “s*** place”. He has no logic left to speak of, and hardly any memory (short or long term). But his emotional memory is of course extremely strong. And right now his emotions are through the roof. And tomorrow I have to go back to my own home and my job 500km away, for the next 5 days. I’ll be back Friday night, but I’ll be worried sick about Mom and Dad all week, and heartbroken at the thought of how much Dad has lost over just the past month. I hate this f’ing disease. I can’t seem to say it enough. 樂

Those of you who are full time caregivers, taking care of LOs at home, or professional caregivers taking care of our LOs... you amaze me. You have all my respect and admiration. What you do is selfless, difficult, and a true reflection of what the human spirit is about. It is incredibly difficult. I thank you and send you my best. 樂

I’d love so much to have my Dad back the way he used to be, if only for a few minutes... I miss my Dad something painfully fierce right now. 樂 樂樂 Admins, please feel free to remove if not appropriate... Next month, I will fly to Argentina and attempt to climb Aconcagua, the highest mountain in the Americas. I am raising funds for the local Alzheimer Society in my parents’ hometown, because it’s a fantastic organization and we as a family are direct beneficiaries of their services. I just feel like giving back. Mountain climbing is hard and painful, and a little risky. It’s also selfish, and this trip will take me away from my parents for a full month. It scares me to leave them for that long. How much will Dad decline in my absence? Will he be mad at me for being gone? How will Mom survive as a caregiver without me to relieve her some of the time? She’s already lonely... And now I will be gone for a full month... The guilt is crippling, yet I feel absolutely compelled to do this. I have sacrificed my career for a year, given up my life since April, and sacrificed much of my own future financial security by dropping everything to take care of Mom and Dad and make sure they are now in a safe place. They are safe and well supported. Just lonely and stuck with this stupid unforgiving disease. My fund raising efforts will help alleviate a little of that loneliness for them and other victims of Alzheimer’s in their town of Laval, Québec, Canada. If you’d like to know more,

Something happened yesterday that affected how I perceive and look at my sick Dad. It broke my heart so badly, that I feel more broken than ever. I’ve had a hard time being with him today, and I know he can sense something is wrong, but trying to explain how his words and attitude were so hurtful is useless. So I must fix myself to soldier on, and prevent this from affecting how I love the person he has become. I know MY Dad is still in there, but I can’t find him right now.

My patience is reaching its limits for the day, yet there is so much more to be done to finish packing and prepping for my parents’ move to a retirement home next week. Dad is confused by all the boxes and packing, repeating questions, wanting to help constantly, and asking “is this coming with us or not?” about everything, while Mom is hyper-emotional and can’t decide anything about anything at this point. She relies on me for “therapy” - she refuses any form of grief therapy or counseling, saying I’m her “favorite shrink”. Despite all my efforts and goodwill, it’s been a very long and difficult summer and I’m reaching my own limits of staying patient with both of them. Ok. Rant over. No need to comment 樂 Just needed to tell someone 樂 Thanks!!! It was a great weekend, we are fortunate. Mom, Dad and I “walked for Alzheimer’s” on Saturday, and yesterday, thanks to a wonderful friend of mine, we spent time with an amazing dog who provided some unofficial “doggie therapy” for Dad, as well as for Mom. My friend was a breath of fresh air herself, allowing Mom (caregiver extraordinare but tired and lonely...) to have a pleasant and relaxed afternoon in great company. Dad was happy, although he asked the dog’s name about 100 times. The dog didn’t mind and neither did we 樂 Tomorrow, I head home (5 hours away), after a week with my parents. One week at home, then back for another week here with them starting next Tuesday... and so on, for the foreseeable next few months... Every time I leave, they cry and both miss me terribly as they try to get along with no “referee” to help make peace. Mom misses my company and the ability to have interesting conversations, and some relief from the constant demands of Dad (and yes, he’s technically in early stages and still “functional”). He misses me because I’m his little girl and I can do no wrong in his eyes... Grateful we had a good week together, dreading the goodbyes, looking forward to being in my own home and seeing my friends, feeling guilty about leaving my parents, and both dreading and looking forward to coming back next week. For the time being, it’s the best I can do. I’m neither superstitious or religious. But I dreamed on Tuesday night that my Dad had passed away. And last night I learned he was hospitalized. He’s in mid-stages and is not near the end stages of the disease. But he’s having issues that I fear could lead to much worse very quickly... I left work after a big meeting this morning and am flying to their hometown to go help Mom and care for them both. Only child and single - sometimes it’s just easier that way... Our little family Christmas two-day vacation 45 minutes from my parents’ home was somewhere between “OK” and “should we just bail and go home early?”. Considering my expectations were low to begin with, I suppose it turned out not-too-bad, but definitely exhausting. However, this is officially the last Christmas we’ll be able to leave home... Between Dad’s AD and Mom’s own health challenges, who knows what the next 6 months will be like... Anyone else feel like they can’t easily remember their LO before the disease, when they were healthy? I have a hard time remembering what Dad was really like, how he and I could converse about interesting things, and share common interests. I’m scared my own memories of him are getting erased the sicker he gets. I don’t want my everlasting memories of my loving and lovely Dad to be only of him as he’s getting sicker.

Dad had 4 relatively good days in a row at the LTC facility (let’s say “no completely outrageous behavior”). We were daring to hope he was adjusting. Of course, we were forgetting the unpredictability of the disease. 樂 This morning, horrible. This afternoon, all good again. 樂 ♀樂 One hour at a time... 樂

Argh... One of those days... 樂樂

Dad suffered a bout of “mean-itis” all afternoon towards a lovely relative who didn’t deserve the sarcasm. He then had “repeat-itis” and “read-all-the-road-signs-itis” all the way home, for 1.5 hours. I’m now experiencing a bit of “exhausted-itis”, “I-wish-for-silence-itis” and “my-tolerance-is-low-itis”. Tomorrow is another day, and we’ll visit a friend who has 3 big fluffy dogs, and that will make everything right. 樂 Curious if anyone’s LO has developed increasingly strong aversions for relatives/friends who provide support and comfort to your LO’s caregivers (you!). My Dad’s increasing dislike for a few people who are close to Mom and me is so strong, it makes it nearly impossible to have visits with those friends/relatives. He’s SO MEAN with them it’s unbearable. So we try to see them in secret, or lie about who’s on the phone, but he’s got a good “nose” and seems to detect whenever we talk to one of our “angels”. Is it jealousy? Fear that these people are taking up too much of our time? I’m worried because it makes it hard for Mom to maintain the relationships she NEEDS to stay sane. One of the people in question spent lots of time, while growing up, with my family, and she’s like a big sister to me. Dad was always kind and nice to her, although he used to tease her (sometimes a little strongly...?). Now, he’s just viciously mean to her... She understands he’s sick, but is very saddened to be the object of such undeserved hatred. Is this common?

I just lost it with Dad. From one minute to the next, he went from Dr Jekyll to Mr Hyde. Mom offered him a snack, very nicely, as had been agreed multiple times on the way back from a pleasant afternoon at the park. All of a sudden, he became absolutely OBSESSED with eating what he normally eats for breakfast, at 4pm. There was no reasoning with him that we were planning dinner at 5:30, and that he should just have a snack. What made me lose it was not an argument over a stupid poached egg. It was the startling realization that Dad was suddenly behaving like a toddler, and that this was a significant and irreversible step towards further decline. And I lost it...

Dad was having an ok day until Mom decided to go visit her best friend for their weekly hourlong chat - call it respite for Mom. I’m home with Dad, so he’s not alone. But he turns mean and starts giving Mom a hard time for leaving. She tears up and almost cancels her visit. I have to calm her down and tell her that no matter what he says, she needs to spend time with her friend, and that his emotions are his to deal with (obviously ours to deal with as well...). I then talk Dad off the anger ledge, by trying to ignore his rant as long as possible. Sigh... Diverted his attention long enough eventually that relative harmony is restored for now. How sad that he cannot comprehend that she needs a little break with her friend... :( Dad woke up this morning and his brain decided it was going to have a bad day. Sigh… (Long) question... Over the past year and a half, as Dad’s Alz has been slowly evolving, he has started disliking more and more intensely certain people in our lives. First, it was my cousin who’s always been close to our family. He absolutely refuses to see her, and has a tantrum if she calls or wants to visit with Mom. More recently, he started complaining about Mom’s closest friend, a neighbor who is a great moral support for Mom. And this week, out of the blue, he started griping about my aunt, whom I love dearly and who is also very close to Mom (and has been very kind and patient with Dad, having gone through very difficult times with her late husband). There’s a pattern that I see: anyone who is able to provide help and comfort to Mom becomes his target to rant against (unjustly), which further isolates Mom. Of course, she still talks to all these great ladies, but it comes at the cost of listening to Dad rant angrily and say very painful things about these people, who are nothing but lovely. Is this a common pattern, in early stages?

Mystery solved! The 10 lb. Container of sugar was going down quickly! Only use it to refill sugar container for coffee, cereal...limited amounts. Last month found it empty, so bought 10 lbs to fill! Caught my LO spooning sugar into his cereal after swearing he didn't touch it ever!!! So he ate 10 lbs of sugar last month alone in his cereal...and he can lie and cover-up his lies quite well! No wonder he's borderline diabetic!樂

Guess deadbolts will need to be installed...he just wandered out into the night! 樂 Thought he was helping me...樂 Well another 3AM romp. He was getting ready to go to work! He used to get up at this time many years ago. Convinced him he didn't have to go in and to go back to bed. Thankfully he went. Had hard time waking him at 7am to get ready for daycare. He was crotchety, but ate, dressed and ready in time. I'm pooped up since 3AMand my flu is raging! Called Dr. Meds increased again...until he stays asleep! Will he ever sleep without wandering? Update day #7... He was up again at 4am, sneaked past my door too, but left the evidence...a trail of Rice Krispies through the kitchen! Then couldn't wake up for daycare. So had to jump thru hoops to get him ready! Uncooperative at best..saying to me thru clenched teeth, "I'm really getting angry"....I was prepared for a swinging arm coming my way! I have the flu from being in the ER last week with him....no sleep and flu not a good combo.樂 Update 10:30pm Another loud crash into the wall! Ran to his room he was standing up on other side of bed. What are you doing? Looking for the cat who was sitting scared in the bed from the crash. He was trying to sneak out of his room to the kitchen again!!! Tomorrow that room will be wired with alarms like Fort Knox! He's evaded footpad...too sneaky for his own good.

He really needs to stay in bed with the meds he has onboard. Unsafe to be moving around. So it's night#5 that I'm up with him! As soon as he came home from daycare he went to bed. Got up for dinner but back in bed! So no sleep for me again tonight if he doesn't! That's 4 nights in a row without sleep! He gets up and wanders and eats! He has 3 different dementias as well. Soon I'll have one due to lack of sleep! Neurologist suggests nursing home and 24 hr. Care...soon. It may have to happen.樂 I'm exhausted as all caregivers are...we need relief when we are sole 24/7 carers! I awoke to find lights on and water running in kitchen sink! He was up yet again during the night eating and wandering even with sleeping meds onboard to keep him asleep. I'm exhausted, up all night, every night. Worried he will turn on other appliances, etc. He has Parkinson's Dementia, Alzheimer's and now FTD too, just dxd this week. Think it's time for a facility to keep him safe? I am constantly cleaning, disinfecting and trying to keep him safe. He doesn't cooperate, but does shower, dress and feed himself. He's incontinent and goes wherever he is! Wears diapers, but still wets the floors, bed, chairs. Constant laundry going ... I need help and can't get any...going downhill fast He has all his needs met and I'm the one losing ground daily. I was dxd with high blood pressure due to stress and exhaustion. As usual no family to help...just me. I'm not a quitter, but ready to throw in the towel.樂

Just took my LO to the store with me...he wandered off. Searched the huge store to no avail. Found him outside waiting near someone's car trying to get in. Car was similar to ours, however, one minute he was there right beside me, next he was gone! I was terrified...he refuses to take direction, was combative all the way home. Now medicated and watching a movie. He will not be going with me again...stress is too much. Now thinking whether to put extra locking devices on doors? Need help with info. A 93 yr old dementia patient was taken by ambulance to ER and dropped there without a representative, aide or anyone from nursing home! Her PoA was called many hours after her arrival. What is the law regarding this transfer, anyone know?

My LO is in a rage. Refused to take meds after looking for his guns and ammo that I removed months ago for safety! Tried to explain I put it away for safety. He didn't understand why. He says everything has been taken away, his license, his job, his rights, he's a non person! I feel bad he feels like this, but then he screamed and said you have them to your boyfriend! What??? I have no boyfriend, no time, interest and don't need more problems! He screamed, ranted and raved. Said he wasn't going back to daycare either where they can't get out. He's unmanageable... finally got him to take his meds...thank God. Should help a little. I am scared, afraid to sleep again. He also tried to open his gun cabinet but key won't work. I switched keys too. So now worried why he wants that stuff? What is he thinking? I do have LE living next door, and station right down the street. I will call if he escalates again! Anyone else ever had this issue? Tia.樂

Ok here we go again! You took my identity, my license, my phone! I'm a non person! It's bon a loop, over and over... he's ramping up fora long combative night. Meds not holding his agression樂! I have spent some time recently with my LO...She is realizing more and more that something is wrong with her memory. There was an incident today where she misplaced her credit card...At the time she was very panicked, justifiably. This, however, started her listing times where she had misplaced/or had forgotten things over the past few weeks and I could tell that she was really scared...I felt so bad. We stopped for a few seconds and I offered her some suggestions about the card, she seemed to calm down after a few deep breaths...Once she returned home, she found the card, it had been placed in the pocket of a different pair of pants from the day before. I am trying to be a lot more mindful about how I communicate with her, keeping in mind that she IS scared, and that she is not able to communicate that with very many people in her close circle...I am appreciating the good days even more than I did before...<3

Another disappointment today...My LO has been seen by a gerontologist, first appt was a few months ago, they were supposed to call about a follow up appointment in August...No call. Just found out that my LO can’t get in to see the gerontologist again because he is so busy, so she will have to see a Nurse Practitioner...This is NOT what she needs right now. She needs a specialist. We are never going to get a proper diagnosis if she doesn’t see the Dr. This is so aggravating, the whole family can see how much worse she is getting, we all were waiting for this appointment to see what the next steps would be...

My grandmother, who has been like a mother to me is currently dealing with a disease affecting her memory...She has not received an official diagnosis, but we are currently working with a gerontologist to get that done. Over the past few months there has been such a change in her...She is more childlike, she is frustrated when people realize there is something wrong (she has been actively trying to keep up a facade), and she is starting to say things that she has never said before - some of which can be quite hurtful. It is getting to be so difficult to deal with all this without being able to talk about it or seek out support. What are your coping strategies?

It's getting more and more difficult to be around my LO that is dealing with dementia. I don't say that to sound mean or cruel, but I guess I am really starting to understand how taxing it is to be in the immediate circle of caregivers. It's soo difficult not to react to their behaviors. There have been times over the past few weeks where I really had to stop myself from looking shocked, getting frustrated, or even just outright crying. Because at the end of the day, I know none of that would help the situation. How do other people cope with situations like this?

The last post I put on this group, I actually had to take down because of all the negativity it was causing. There are a few things that I would ask people to remember before making comments that can sometimes seem very judgmental Don't ever assume. EVER. Not what a LO's relationship to the person commenting, not what care they have/have not looked into, not where they live...When in doubt, ask. There are people in this group from different countries, our health systems are NOT all the same. Don't tell others what they need emotionally, only they know that. This is a very rough time for LOs and caregivers. This group is meant as a support to those who are on this journey...Sometimes there are good days, but there are also many bad days. I hope we can all learn a bit from this going forward. Thank you It is so hard to change how you’ve interacted with someone for your whole life during the battle with dementia. For years I’ve been jokey and sarcastic - now that is always taken personally. On the good days, it’s like there is no problem, it’s like it always was...When the bad days come, which are now more and more frequent, I slip up and that’s when trouble starts. Tonight I got a phone call from my LO saying that it’s too stressful/anxiety causing for me to be there and she doesn’t want any contact anymore. My heart sank when I heard this and I was at a complete loss for words...Thankfully, tonight I spent an hour talking to a friend who has had a lot of experience with dementia with her family and she was able to let me vent and

We’ve definitely turned a corner...My LO is now thinking that I am sneaking into her house to take things. I was up there one day and I left a sock which had actually fallen out of my sleeve (what can I say I just did laundry and got dressed in a hurry)...The next day I was there and had an extremely bad interaction with her, so bad that I actually left to go home. This is the first time that’s ever happened, but I couldn’t take it anymore. On my way out I grabbed the sock and took it with me. Tonight, I get a call with the mystery of the sock that had disappeared. She didn’t even remember me being there when I explained it, and her tone totally changed to one of suspicion as to how I got it back...This is turning into pure hell. Hello my friends, I plan on documenting the treasured memories of mom's life. To help engage her and remind her that despite her afflictions she is and will always be integral to her family and will never, ever be forgotten.

Mom, your heart has forever been the compass by which your decisions are made. An unconditional love, as unfailling as it is inexhaustible. You are my hero, an example of dedication and fortitude. In our darkest of times you held forth the light which guided us. For myself, I will always give thanks for being in your life. Giving me the opportunity to comfort you in your time of great need (Alzheimer's/Dementia), trusting me and above all loving me, (while I wish it was not necessary) I pray that I will be able to furnish you with the foundation you will need to anchor yourself through this journey.

Your every action or reaction, has its foundation in your Catholic upbringing: Love, Mercy and Forgiveness. These tenets stood you well when raising seven children. And when your heart shattered with the passing of your daughter, Kathy, at 30 yrs you never faltered. My beloved sister, afflicted with severe Cerebral Palsy unable to talk, walk or take care of her needs was always loved beyond measure. You made sure of that and our home was blessed. Kathy managed to convey her love for you and us. With a smile as rare and beautiful as she herself was, blossoming with each gaze upon your face. You fought for her, bucking a system that tried to place her in an institution and you prevailed. I'm sorry but something I read on this site has been grating on my nerves and I need to speak. A person(my apologies for not remembering who and for taking too long to address this) mentioned that when thier LO was discussed with a "friend" the condition of Alzheimer's was referenced as being not as important as say, one suffering from Cancer. First of all, the degree of importance is not by the disease itself as much as it is by the effect it has on the the person(s) suffering and those suffering along side with them. Inane comments like these show a person of questionable intelligence and one devoid of compassion/empathy. Perhaps the understanding of Alzheimer's and the fact that it destroys a person and any relationship possible to live a life except thru fleeting connections and memories that all to soon vanish to be replaced by agonizing fear and continuous terror. Being stripped of ones essence day by day, minute by minute, is inconceivable to many and should never be discounted. We are our memories and to be without them is to be cast adrift-- alone but for the few brief instances when by some miracle we connect. Enough of my rant. Thank you for listening.

Mom is very depressed at wanting to be productive in someway. I have asked her to teach me how to speak Spanish. I hope this will pull her out of her blues. They have so much they want to give before it is all gone. How many have heard this moronic unfeeling and dehumanizing putdown "...oh they will just forget..' from people that take this as a balm for any pain our loved ones may be facing. Not sure if I posted already...capture attention of loved one... Take container of the favorite food and cut it into puzzle pieces...when they put it together they get the treat. To those that shared your views and advice, thank you. Update, my sister dropped mom back over to me. Typical of her and maddening to my poor mom and myself. Thank you again. It seems that everything posted on this site is coming under such scrutiny and is being found offensive or shaming that I am hesitant to post anything. I am sure I am not the only one to feel this way. I believe that these postings are meant to enlighten, educate, allow a no fear environment of which to vent without the fear of reprisals. Just venting here. Thank you One can only remember the days when she would know exactly what you needed: a kiss, hug, smile and you would return the smile thinking she would always be there for you. Then reality re-asserts itself and a longing for what can never be shatters your composure. You wipe the tears and wrap your arms around her to let her feel the love you will always have for her and hopefully she for you. Somewhere you hope, a connection will spark a memory and a smile will shine through this darkness. Never give up, or it will have won. Prayers to us all.

We see so much evil being perpetrated against our "loved ones" and it is criminal if not heinous. To try to rip away a person's liberties while in the condition they are faced with, is downright "torture". That being said, I wish to say a few words about "hope". Hope is what pretty much fuels my "engine". Without it, we would pretty much be souless automotons, biding our time till the end of the loved one. I feel we are all an extended family(the good ones I wish I had, personally)else why would we be here lending guidance and understanding. Thank you all for being, well you. :-). Don't lose sight of hope, sure we know it's outcome (middle finger saluting Alzheimer's)but miracles do happen. It's just learning to recognize them that is the problem. An unbidden smile, a song that soars from a mouth soundless for months, a toe tapping to some unheard beat. These are miracles. My mom, 89 yrs, stroke, hearing and sight disabilities, Alzheimer's and dementia. The miracle I see--she is alive and with me. That is good enough for me. From that point, I will continue and find evidence of more miracles. Enough of my chatter. I wish you all as much happiness with your loved ones as possible. Don't give up the fight, we are legion and we must never lose sight of love and hope. Thank you for allowing me to join this group

Dearest Heart of mine - If I could, - I would, - Take you away from this place - of confusion and despair, - Let me take your hand Lead you to a promised land - Where dreams are cherished and memories never fade - May our time together - shine and banish the phantoms of that - Other - That fiend that preys - and seeks to hurl you into Oblivion - But you will never succumb - Your heart is that of a lion. - Hold my hand - Tho your heart beats fast Your tears of regret - Will never last - The precious time that now remains - We will share as one Till our journeys done.

I miss you mom - But you haven't gone - Your smile brings light to the darkest days - Remember the times when we fell so low A bus ride in the night arms wrapped around - each other tight - You called me your angel And I kissed your cheek - You smiled and I knew that things would be alright I hear you rail at the unfairness...loss of career, friends that disappeared, a mind once sharp now broken but still aware. My heart aches with your pain and I want to hold you in my arms and tell you not to worry, that things will be ok, like you did many times to a young boy many years ago and still up to this day.

I can tell you in all truth...I will never leave you alone, we will walk this path together. Your fading strength is still fueled by an indomitable will and that is how 90 yrs have come and gone. My love for you is eternal as yours is for me. I miss you mom - But you haven't gone - Your smile brings light - to the darkest days Remember the times when we fell so low -A bus ride in the night arms wrapped around each other tight - You called me your angel And I kissed your cheek - You smiled and I knew that things would be alright

I hear you rail at the unfairness...loss of career, friends that disappeared, a mind once sharp now broken but still aware.

My heart aches with your pain and I want to hold you in my arms and tell you not to worry, that things will be ok, like you did many times to a young boy many years ago and still up to this day.

I can tell you in all truth...I will never leave you alone, we will walk this path together. Your fading strength is still fueled by an indomitable will and that is how 90 yrs have come and gone. My love for you is eternal as yours is for me.

I miss you mom - But you haven't gone - Your smile brings light to the darkest days - Remember the times when we fell so low A bus ride in the night arms wrapped around - each other tight - You called me your angel And I kissed your cheek - You smiled and I knew that things would be alright I hear you rail at the unfairness...loss of career, friends that disappeared, a mind once sharp now broken but still aware. My heart aches with your pain and I want to hold you in my arms and tell you not to worry, that things will be ok, like you did many times to a young boy many years ago and still up to this day.

I can tell you in all truth...I will never leave you alone, we will walk this path together. Your fading strength is still fueled by an indomitable will and that is how 90 yrs have come and gone. My love for you is eternal as yours is for me. It started as a tapping - So easy to dismiss - But when it became a knocking we knew something was amiss, - And when the door burst open, - life as we knew it, would never be the same A monster now living among us, impossible to tame - An innocent now a hostage but free of any blame. ....I think about my mom, - And the day when she'll be gone, - Not slipping gently into - the night of a last twilight but eclipsed by a - A tortuous path - That the twisted hand of fate has craft - Yet hidden in it's folds - are the glints of gold - her memories that can never be lost - For the soul is for eternity and so holds the promise That all will never ever be forgotten...... I think about my mom, - And the day when she'll be gone, - Not slipping gently into - the night of a last twilight but eclipsed by a - A tortuous path - That the twisted hand of fate has craft - Yet hidden in it's folds - are the glints of gold - her memories that can never be lost - For the soul is for eternity and so holds the promise That all will never ever be forgotten... Gonna include this in mom's birthday card "Listen to my words" -Had I the words when first we met "I will love you forever" you would have heard. "You are my heart, my home, my reason" I would have said. Those tears I cried, were not from pain nor from fear, But the simple joy of having you near. Listen to my words -Your arms kept me safe from any and all harm, Your wisdom and strength, gave to me, these words you hear. - Listen to my words - Let my arms embrace to shield you from the storm, - Let my words remind you of who - you are and who you will always be. I see beyond that which seeks to claim you as its own, - It will never touch the soul of the woman I have known Mom, I will defend you and aid in the battle of that which seeks to erase your existence(Alzheimer's & Dementia) I will never forget and you will never fade away. Listen to my words My love for you began the day we met and will last until my dying breath. "Listen to my words"

Had I the words when first we met "I will love you forever" you would have heard. "You are my heart, my home, my reason" I would have said. Those tears I cried, were not from pain nor from fear, But the simple joy of having you near.

Listen to my words - Your arms kept me safe from any and all harm, Your wisdom and strength, gave to me, these words you hear. - Listen to my words Let my arms embrace to shield you from the storm, Let my words remind you of who you are and who you will always be.

I see beyond that which seeks to claim you as its own, It will never touch the soul of the woman I have known Mom, I will defend you and aid in the battle of that which seeks to erase your existence(Alzheimer's & Dementia) I will never forget and you will never fade away.

Listen to my words My love for you began the day we met and will last until my dying breath.

In the past, I have talked with Mom about Kathy, my sister, her daughter and how I wanted to set down the joy she brought to us up (and even now)to her passing. Mom was genuinely thrilled about this.

Mom, your heart has forever been your compass and the unconditional love you blessed us with is as unfailing as it is inexhaustible. You are my hero, an example of dedication and fortitude. In our darkest of times you held forth the light(Heart Soul)which guided us. For myself, I will always give thanks for having you in my life. And allowing me the opportunity to comfort you in these desperate of times.

I will hold your hand - In the light of day - And in the darkness of the night You are that star that guides me - Cross turbulent waters - I will hold your hand Ever tenderly - Never letting it go - For I would be lost -Adrift without bearing Your body though frail -Houses the spirit of a lion - Always in defense of those you love. I am honored to be one of those - Love, honor and compassion you imbued in my soul I will love you forever, - Honor you now And treasure each moment we share. I was wondering if there is a certain "type" of music that helps a person with Alzheimers or Dementia to "come back to us"(ironic choice of words, if one has seen the movie I will be referencing below). I propose that we list those special songs/music of our loved ones.

Mom's favorite is the soundtrack from "Somewhere in Time". Thank you

I was wondering if there is a certain "type" of music that helps a person with Alzheimers or Dementia to "come back to us"(ironic choice of words, if one has seen the movie I will be referencing below). I propose that we list those special songs/music of our loved ones.

Mom's favorite is the soundtrack from "Somewhere in Time". Thank you

You probably know already to do this.. Video your loved ones. I was about to delete a vid made of mom(she was mortified樂when I showed her it but I stopped. Mortification, anger樂 happiness☺樂 sadness☹樂...these emotions are what make her my mother and I will treasure them as I am treasuring her while for the grace of God she remains with us. Please pray for mom and me. Mom has dementia and Alzheimer's and we are soon to be home less. Mom's love ("Zoe" Maltese of 9 years was taken). Thank you

Miracle...I landed a job. My brother and nephew did not want to raise the car door window even after being told lo was cold. Well that window is stuck open. Let them freeze their axss off....

(This is how I believe a person feels as he begins his descent) Once upon a time, I was just like you. I had a life, job, family and friends. I did everything right, or at least, I gave it my best shot. But my life changed. I don't know how or why it happened but I started to forget things. A name, the day ...my memories dimmed, some even vanished leaving me scared and confused. Sometimes, I may scream or shout but I'm not mad at you. I just want my life back...I think it was good...I miss you and all the things we once did...I think, I'm not sure...do you still love me? Will you love me later. Please, I'm scared.. I'll try to be good. Don't leave me...what did I do that I forget? Was I bad? I wish I knew, so I could say "I'm sorry". Sometimes, somedays, I can hear a song and I may sing. A picture in my mind out of nowhere - a baby in my arms, my son? It's nice. If I push you, or yell, it's just to get your attention, to make sure you won't forget me, but you're not me, you're not supposed to forget. I'm just scared that one day you will forget, forget me, forget that you love me... We see so much evil being perpetrated against our "loved ones" and it is criminal if not heinous. To try to rip away a person's liberties while in the condition they are faced with is downright "torture". That being said, I wish to say a few words about "hope". Hope is what pretty much fuels my "engine". Without it, we would pretty much be souless automotons, biding our time till the end of the loved one. I feel we are all an extended family(the good ones I wish I had, personally)else why would we be here lending guidance and understanding. Thank you all for being, well you. :-). Don't lose sight of hope, sure we know it's outcome (middle finger saluting Alzheimer's)but miracles do happen. It's just learning to recognize them that is the problem. An unbidden smile, a song that soars from a mouth soundless for months, a toe tapping to some unheard beat. These are miracles. My mom, 89 yrs, stroke, hearing and sight disabilities, Alzheimer's and dementia. The miracle I see--she is alive and with me. That is good enough for me. From that point, I will continue and find evidence of more miracles. Enough of my chatter. I wish you all as much happiness with your loved ones as possible. Don't give up the fight, we are legion and we will never lose sight of love and hope. Thank

When I was little I used to be afraid of the dark. Monsters would be ready to devour me up, I thought. Running to mom, she would soothe me, with arms around me, I would sometimes stay with her till morning. "...there are no monsters, don't be afraid...", She whispered into my ear. She was wrong. A monster is slowly, methodically trying to take her away, bit by bit. One day, it will swallow her memories, her will and eventually her life. I am more terrified and heartbroken than I have ever been, but I will hold her in my arms and say..."Mom, I love you with all of my heart, it will beat for the both of us, my soul that is given to us by God and cannot be touched by any but Him. Your soul too is inviolate. His hand was the first to hold it, and will be the last till you are once again free and with those who have gone before you. I pray that our combined strength and courage along with the will of God, will see us thru this nightmare. I loved you yesterday, today and forever.

When I was little I used to be afraid of the dark. When night arrived, I knew monsters would be ready to devour me.

Running to you, you would soothe me, arms encircling me, I would sometimes stay with you till morning. "...there are no monsters, don't be afraid...", You whispered into my ear as holding me closer, the shivering subsided.

You were wrong.

A monster is slowly, methodical trying to take you away, bit by bit. One day, it will swallow your memories, your will and eventually your life. I am more terrified and heartbroken then I have ever been, but know this, I will hold you in my arms and say..."Mom, I love you with all of my heart and and my soul. I will stay to give you strength and love as you do for me even now." For the both of us, my heart will beat. Although your mind may betray you, your soul remains pure. It is inviolate. HIS hand was the first to hold it, and will be the last, till you are once again free and with those who have gone before you.

I pray that our combined strength, courage and love will see us through. I loved you yesterday, today and i will forever in the days to come. When I was little I used to be afraid of the dark. When night arrived, I knew monsters would be ready to devour me. Running to you, you would soothe me, arms encircling me, I would sometimes stay with you till morning. "...there are no monsters, don't be afraid...", You whispered into my ear as holding me closer, the shivering subsided. You were wrong. A monster is slowly, methodical trying to take you away, bit by bit. One day, it will swallow your memories, your will and eventually your life. I am more terrified and heartbroken then I have ever been, but know this, I will hold you in my arms and say..."Mom, I love you with all of my heart and and my soul. I will stay to give you strength and love as you do for me even now." For the both of us, my heart will beat. Although your mind may betray you, your soul remains pure. It is inviolate. HIS hand was the first to hold it, and will be the last, till you are once again free and with those who have gone before you. I pray that our combined strength, courage and love will see us through. I loved you yesterday, today and i will forever in the days to come. nce upon a time, I was just like you. I had a life, job, family and friends. I did everything right, or at least I gave it my best shot. But my life changed. I don't know how or why it happened but i started to forget things. A name, the day ...my memories dimmed, some even vanished leaving me scared and confused. Sometimes, I may scream or shout but I'm not mad at you. I just want my life back...I think it was good. ...miss you and all the things we once did...I think, I'm not sure...do you still love me? Will you love me later. Please, I'm scared.. I'll try to be good. Don't leave me...what did I do that I forget? Was I bad? I wish I knew, so I could say "I'm sorry". Sometimes, somedays, I can hear a song and might sing. A picture in my mind out of nowhere - a baby in my arms, my son? It's nice. If I push you, or yell, it's just to get your attention, to make sure you won't forget, but you're not me, you're not supposed to forget. I'm just scared that one day you will forget, forget me, forget that you love me... We see so much evil being perpetrated against our "loved ones" and it is criminal if not heinous. To try to rip away a person's liberties while in the condition they are faced with is downright "torture". That being said, I wish to say a few words about "hope". Hope is what pretty much fuels my "engine". Without it, we would pretty much be souless automotons, biding our time till the end of the loved one. I feel we are all an extended family(the good ones I wish I had, personally)else why would we be here lending guidance and understanding. Thank you all for being, well you. :-). Don't lose sight of hope, sure we know it's outcome (middle finger saluting Alzheimer's)but miracles do happen. It's just learning to recognize them that is the problem. An unbidden smile, a song that soars from a mouth soundless for months, a toe tapping to some unheard beat. These are miracles. My mom, 89 yrs, stroke, hearing and sight disabilities, Alzheimer's and dementia. The miracle I see--she is alive and with me. That is good enough for me. From that point, I will continue and find evidence of more miracles. Enough of my chatter. I wish you all as much happiness with your loved ones as possible. Don't give up the fight, we are legion and we will never lose sight of love and hope. Thank Guys, my mother has started peeing a lot since winter is almost here. Her diaper doesn't hold it and I have to change the entire bed sheet and give her a shower everyday. Any tips to help with this? I'm separating her bed so at least dad can have his peace. But what else can I do to hold it. I go back.to work tomorrow and dad will be alone to it then. Need suggestions please

Does it make me crazy to be worried about getting alzheimer's like my mom when I am her age? My mother has the worst bed sores even though she doesn't sleep through the day. Got her an air mattress and duo derma patches. Unfortunately, the duo derma patches don't stay stuck with the sores. anybody facing the same? what can i do to help heal the sores. please advise. and send prayers I feel as though taking care of my Mom has become a routine for me. Like somehow I am desensitized to her condition. It's just become something I have to do. And I feel numb doing all of it. Do you guys feel the same after some time?

Its bugging me a lot. Feels as though I dont love her anymore. But that's not the case in real... I took a 3 day vacation from this disease, went up to the mountains, got drunk, had the best time with my friends!!! And now I am at the hospital again, sitting in the waiting area of the OR, counting minutes as my mother gets her bed sore cavity cleared out under GA.

How is it that the good times fly by and the bad ones seem to never end. So so upset right now Had the craziest day at work, had to stay late and came home tired as hell to find mom sitting on the sofa. I sat beside her, started talking to her, made her drink her supplements, took selfies with her. Everything was going ok and all of a sudden she said "let me die"

I hate this disease. I hate this day and I hate that all the good moments had to end this way. I cry every moment I find to myself which is pretty rare these days. I don't mind taking care of her, but I cant deal with the emotional stuff. Its killing me now! Thank you for accepting my request to join. My mother is a late stage alzheimer's patient and I need constant help and support. She is extremely agitated and aggressive while she is awake and her sleep pattern is totally lost. My father and I are the only people taking care of her and we are both exhausted all the time. The minute she wakes up, she starts walking around and doesn't stop until she sleeps. She curses, cries and hits us. Changing her, bathing her and cleaning her has become very difficult. She doesnt stop hitting me until I am done with her personal duties. My mother stopped taking solid food almost 3 months ago, and since then, we have been giving her liquid supplements, which she has now stopped drinking as well.

Any word of advise would be appreciated here. Please tell me how to make her comfortable, how to make her take the medicines herself.

My mother has been losing weight for a year. She insists that being thin makes her look younger (it actually makes her look frail). The doctor keeps telling her she needs to gain for her health, but my mom doesn't seem to remember anyone's admonition that she has become much too thin.

We've set up a sort of feeding station next to her chair and couch with lots of food and water. Getting the food in sight seems to be working for now, but she is complaining that there is too much food around and she would like to lose some more weight.

How do we deal with someone who needs to eat more but who repeatedly says she wants to lose weight to look younger? My mother is in a nice memory care place. The other day my brother talked to her on the phone and she said "the situation is strange" but that she likes it. I've seen her join in clapping to disco in a big circle of patients with a smile on her face.

She says to me, "Wow, I was fine then I got old really fast. I won't even tell you what it's like. I don't want to scare you."

She lived alone in a nice house with nice things, and now her nice clothes have her name in Sharpie or on iron on labels. It seems baffling to her.

I like to think of Mom as a deposed queen who has been sent to an island. At some point she lost track of political intrigue in the court and she still hasn't figured out exactly how she lost her position. It all happened so fast.

Crummy disease! Well, we have ants at my mother's house now.

Mom leaves dirty dishes in the sink, apples in the disposal, yogurt lids on the counter. Stuff all over the counters.

I say, throw things right in the garbage can, they don't need to spend any time on the counter. Dishes in the dishwasher. She says, "my mother never taught me how to clean," or "Well, some people do things a different way."

My wife and I wiped down the ant trail and we'll see later today where we stand.

The fridge whiteboard now says, "Throw garbage away. Nothing in the sink or on counters."

Oh well. My mother has a three part will. The first two parts are for when she is alive. First is financial power of attorney (requires doctor's letter). Second is advance directive for medical decisions. Third is the part that splits the assets. I appreciate Mom for getting all that ready 10 years ago. It has made many things easier. Just went with my brother and my mother to close out her last bank account so we could consolidate to one that knows me and my mother personally. The whole drive she was asking if we were going to the doctor.

I'm always thinking, "Well, this looks sketchy. Two guys with a confused elderly woman emptying out an account."

So glad to have the banks done. My mother lives in her own home. I live a few blocks away and visit in the morning and evening. I often take her around the block on a walk. Lately her gait has gotten terrible. Sometimes she leans forward and starts going fast. If she can't slow down I have to grab her.

Luckily, only one fall lately and it was in the grass.

Has anyone seen this? She just can't seem to coordinate her arms and legs.

I don't want her to stop getting out and walking, but I also don't want her to fall. My mother lost her sense of smell years before we knew she had dementia. She attributed it to hay fever. I have since read that a lost sense of smell is early warning for dementia. Has anyone else looked back and realized that there were signs early on?

I just spent over an hour on the phone with CenturyLink to get them to remove over $40 in charges my mother incurred calling 411 in one month. She has had worse charges in the past. They disconnected me twice transferring me, and every disconnection is another maddening journey through their phone menus.

There is no way to find out from the phone company what numbers she was getting, or even if her calls to 411 were successful.

CenturyLink will not block 411 calls. But I think we can pay extra for a service that lets us manually list some outgoing numbers to be blocked.

I assume I'm not the only one who has run into this.

In the hospital after a fall. Luckily, my mom broke her femur just below the hip, and the hip itself is OK. The surgery to put the pin through should be relatively easy, according to the surgeon.

An NP told us that a serious break can advance her dementia. Is that what folks here have seen with their LOs? I've had my mom be unable to figure out if I was my father or my brother occasionally the past year, but yesterday was the first day I've heard her say, "Who is Rhett?"

Before and after...check out that mustache! I should become a barber in my spare time! 樂樂 (Researcher notice: comparing photo, before and after action) If it's not one thing it's another. His gums are so soft. Took a extra soft baby toothbrush to clean his teeth, just barely touched it on his gums and it immediately started bleeding! Have antibiotics and prescription mouthwash but he won't spit. Hard times again

I'm praying that my husband can finish with his BM. He's constipated. I sat him up in sitting position hoping he can get it out. If he doesn't this means I have to dig it out 樂樂 I hate having to do that. Omg He had Diarrhea at 245 this morning. Omg! 樂 No more sweet potato for a while. 樂 So I was changing his diaper earlier & had him on his side towards me....i was holding onto him while reaching under him to find the other side of the diaper that had the tape on it. My arm touched his butt. I said Oh I'm not trying to get fresh. He said....Well why not? 樂樂樂 Sorry me again. I've got a question. My hubby is going into Stage 7 & always have problems to get him to use toilet for BM. Its 98% of the time he refuses. Its like he's confused or I don't really know but he refuses to allow me to assist with pulling pants down to sit. He won't do it himself. Has anyone had this problem & if so what did you do to get passed it? Has anyone experienced your LO not seeming to try to have BM? Its like its there but they won't try or tell you if they feel it. When it happens its in the diaper. He still talks some but doesn't tell me. Sorry for the subject question. Just curious Does one feel that changing an adult diaper for a LO with alzheimers is considered intimacy? I don't look at it as that at all. Just wondering how everyone else thinks about this Well as everyone knows hubby is bed bound. I can get him out of bed but it wears us both out so much. A few minutes ago he tells me that he is bored. I think he wants to get out of bed for a while. I am thinking I should try it but not looking forward to the workout! Guess I can get him out of bed and push him around in the wheelchair all over the house! LOL Again the food isn't going down right. Yesterday was a big scare. I jerked him forward so freaking fast. The look on his face told me he got scared too. I need to find a better solution. Scared of aspiration. Thicker foods is hard to go down too. Prayers for him please & me too for God's guidance to figure out a solution

This is his typical breakfast since a month ago. Before & after pics. If I had more food he would probably keep going! Scares me after a while. It's so much food!! Does your loved ones eat this much at one time? Note: he still eats a lot for lunch and dinner too. Practically the same amount for each meal Prayer request please. FYI...my husband is starting to have problems not swallowing right. I'm praying that this will not continue. Scary as hell. UPDATE: today I pureed everything. Made everything so that he could drink it. It seems to be much better. Only twice it happened and 1 time was when I gave him pureed pears so he could take his meds. I'm guessing that he wasn't chewing his food good enough and trying to swallow and it was getting stuck in his throat. He's refusing to eat again today. Hmm.

I've discovered something & wanted to share! If your LO doesn't want to be moved in upright position to drink (head of course needs to be high enough without choking) I used a syringe to give my hubby and it worked like a charm! He drank 1 1/2 containers of strawberry Ensure. That's 12 oz. Less work and kept him content without moving him. 樂 IMPORTANT COMMENT: This method is not for every LO. Many have commented that aspiration is a possible issue and I am being extra careful...

So changes have occurred since this past Friday....(BTW I hate the changes) he is now at the stage of eating everything like baby food consistency. I think he just wasn't chewing enough. (I need to clarify what I mean...at every meal on Friday the food was getting stuck. He had a mild choking like it was not going down right. He would get it down after a second or so) Another change is that his muscles are tightening up a muscle relaxer has been prescribed. So this is as they say is a catch 22 (not sure exactly where that phrase came from but it is either give him the muscle relaxer and it will make him sleepy but he already sleeps a lot already or leave him without the meds and try to work with massages or range of motion to hopefully help him. My concern is that since the muscle relaxer will make him sleepy then how am I supposed to feed him and give him drink? This is so hard and devastating and I have to be the one that has to make these decisions. I may need to talk to my adults kids and have a family discussion if this happens of nothing but sleep. This is scary. I'm feeding him his lunch/dinner in bed and boy is he really squeezing my fingers hard. ☺

My husband used to not eat a whole lot. Lots of times in the past he wanted to eat but couldn't open his mouth big enough to even get a spoonful of food in his mouth. So I went with smoothies, Ensure and pureed foods. He still needs most foods pureed because if there's a chunk of say carrot, pea or corn he will spit it out. Now for the past week or 2 he's pigging out on the food...He's eating a lot. The past 3 days when I'm giving him a drink he's trying to drink it fast. It's like he's not getting it fast enough. Has anyone's LO done this? It's mind boggling to me Gave 1/2 cup warm prune juice. It's gonna be a long messy night. 樂 WARNING! Be careful with the fruit tray consumption! That's all I gotta say about that! 樂 My husband doesn't talk hardly at all anymore. Today I had provider to feed him sweet potato with a little brown sugar. She told me when he got first spoonful he said "Mmmmm" 樂樂 Hubby eating like he was starving! 2 eggs over easy, 1/2 cup refried beans, slice of toast with strawberry jelly (soft small bites), 4 oz mango peach applesauce & 5-6 oz koolaide! Wow!! 樂 He was eating fast too! I said Woe slow down mister before you choke! 樂 I will ask him Do you Love me? It's easy for him to answer Yes or in his own way I know it's yes. When I ask are you in pain? I get a stare. I rephrase And ask do you need Tylenol? Or are legs hurting? I always get a stare and he blinks his eyes. I ask again you still love me? He answers Yes but if he can't answer Yes he will pucker up for a kiss. I wonder why he does this. Anyone experienced this with their LOs?

I always tell my hubby what I'm going to do before I do anything such as I'm going to change/ clean you up, I'm now going to remove the blanket, etc. Well last night I didn't & he got angry. Grabbed my wrist so hard that he was hurting me. Lesson learned I must remember to tell him what I'm going to do with each step or I definitely will get hurt. This is my tip of the day! After that episode and all was done I told him he hurt me and i got bunches of kisses. His way of apologizing.

Last night after getting him cleaned up, readjusted him & gave him drink I was fixing the blanket on his legs & feet he's looking at me like he's thinking something. I smile & ask him What? He trying to talk with a struggle. A few words came out but ended with mumbling. I pause and think and asked Did you just say I'm so beautiful (he would always tell me that) he smiles & says yes!! Well don't you know I rushed to give him a kiss and hug and told him I love you so much. 樂

Hubby met our precious granddaughter today. His reaction PRICELESS!! We got the right moment樂 I walk into bedroom and he's pulling on the blanket. I pick up Teddy (his stuffed Teddy bear). He reacts like I'm going to hit him. I said I'm not going to hit you. I love you too much but you would hit me. He asks When? (He rarely talks) I said Sometimes you do but I try to get away from you. He said Well you're not dead! 樂樂樂 Well I've learned something today. I was talking to his nurse very briefly about the situation with our daughter being in the hospital which is a very long story and I won't go there but as I was talking about it

So at 3:15 am I wake up to go to bathroom. I check on hubby & he's uncovered and freezing cold (it's not cold in his room) I need to change his diaper as well. After I'm done and got him all snuggled in I give him a gentle kiss and tell him I love you. He says O-o-ok. I asked Do you love me? He says No.

Last nite he asked me (struggling with his words) & said Where Are Your Onion Rings? 樂❤❤ He's talking a little more this morning but he's seeing things & making up words Sharing special moment... I got him to drink one whole cup of strawberry Ensure, one cup of a oatmeal smoothie & about 3 teaspoons of peaches for his medicines and another medicine. He had his eyes closed but in a way to where it was like he was thinking of something and smiling but only with his eyes. I was fixing the bed with the pillows and such to get him cuddled in the bed because I knew he was ready to go back to sleep. Right when I was done he whispers something to me but I had to ask him to repeat it. He did repeat it and said I'll see you later

I was feeding my man, cleaning him up, shaving his face and the shirt he had on was just too hot so I needed to get it changed. During the time that we were working on changing his shirt (he is bedridden) I was taking a very short break to catch my breath. While the break was happening, I put my head on his chest and hugging on him. He asked me "When are we going to leave?" I paused....didn't want to say we won't ever but instead I said You gotta get stronger and get better before we can go anywhere. I told him it is too hard to get you out of the bed and then way much harder to get you into the SUV. I told him that I miss it a lot of us riding around together. He looks at me with a distant stare and says.....Me Too. The typical sentence that my husband says is either a 3 or 4 word sentence...well....tonight after his sister left with her 2 dogs the house was so nice and quiet. So so pleasant. He stayed up until 930 pm (typically he is ready by 630 or 7) and he said a SEVEN word sentence!!! I am amazed! LOL. He said "We don't know what we are doing" This is totally amazing to me! :) So I was feeding him his supper. It seemed that I was feeding him way too much. I asked him Do you want more? He says I want you to.....I want you to..... (then he stops and was looking at me) I said Oh you want I just love it when I least expect it that I have a lengthy conversation with my husband and he's totally 100% understanding what we're talking about. He was trying to ask me in his own way why he is always in the bed. I explained the reasons why because it's not safe and that his legs just don't work right anymore. I told him that he can't keep his balance well and he hangs onto me for dear life because I know that he thinks that he's going to fall. I told him how much I loved him and how sorry I am that he's going through this. At one point during our conversation he was again in his own way trying to tell me that we need to reverse our roles. By saying that he was trying to say that he wanted me to be in the bed and him being out of the bed so he can take care of me. 樂 Tomorrow is our daughter's 29th birthday and her and her fiance along with our son and his wife will be coming over for a little get together to eat and have birthday cake. I told him if he was up to it that I'm getting him out of the bed so he can go in there with us in the other part of the house. He says he likes that idea. So I hope and pray that tomorrow is a good day and I can get him out of the bed so he can spend time with all of us. It may not be for long before he gets too tired but I'm going to All the time we tell each other I love you. When he answers back its a whisper. He always talks in a whisper when he does talk. Yesterday he took me by surprise and answered I LOVE YOUUU TOO (loud) 樂 I jumped! Lol

I go into bedroom where he's sleeping. I gently wake him up so I can clean him up. First thing he says (whispering) I love you Babe! ❤樂 I hate it that I have to tell a grown adult man its his bedtime. Feels so disrespectful and wrong but gotta do what I gotta do We had a great day yesterday. He kept asking about my Mom. He hasn't seen her in a while. I asked her to come for a visit. Later in evening I told him that I loved him with my whole heart. His reply (priceless) with his eyes big & says I love you with my 2 hearts!! ❤❤

I just love it so much when my husband comes back as the real him. It was all of a sudden I could see it in his eyes that it was really him. He was telling me...At 1st he was saying we needed to leave (something like he wants to go home) I told him we are home in our bedroom, laying in the bed & our pets are in here with us. He says ok....but 1 needs to go! I asked Who needs to go? He says You do! Smiling. I said Me? Then who will take care of you? He thinks and says Yeah who will clean my butt?! 樂 even later he wanted me to lay beside him (He has hospital bed) so i squeezed beside him & He just kept giving me kisses over & over again. He told me several times that he loved me so much. ❤ I loved every minute. This doesn't last very long when it does happen & makes me realize truly how much I miss him. Twice yesterday he was talking to me in Spanish. I don't know Spanish very well. He's always spoke to me in English. I'm worried if He continues then I won't be able to communicate with him anymore. He even didn't know I was his wife. Asked me Where is Mic? (That's me ) Yesterday was another awesome day. He again was able to talk in complete sentences. I'm just wanting to share something ... When I was getting him cleaned up while he was in bed he was whispering during this conversation & I thought he asked if we were married. I said Yes. He says Awww man!! I said But I'm married to you! He says Really?! I told him for over 34 years we were. He asks Who told you to do that? I said My heart did! Then he gave me a kiss. ❤ 樂 My husband for months couldn't communicate complete sentences but this weekend he was his old self. Able to speak complete sentences and would include himself in others conversations. I wonder what this actually means. Today he's almost back to his old self. Any reasoning here?

Last night we had a storm come through. At 3 am power went out and was out until 645 am.....pretty rough since my 2 dogs are scaredy cats and most importantly I was concerned that my husband's air mattress had deflated because of no power. This morning the home health agency called lady called asking if we were ok because of the storm. I told her how things went but we were all ok now. I told her that I was about ready to change his diaper, the pad and his t-shirt. Do you want to come over and help me? I hear silence for a moment and then she says Huh? What? Umm!! I replied Oh I didn't think so but chuckled! I took her off guard big time! 樂 **I mentioned that I really need a generator but know nothing about them. I said I needed to do some research to find one that isn't too expensive. I think I should do this because my thoughts are What if he needs to be on oxygen later on and no power? Not good at all. She said she would check into it for me as well. Something for us all to think about* (sorry this ended up a very long post)

I love it to leave the house and come back with kitchen clean, dishes done, trash taken out, laundry, floors mopped, hubby taken care of and was fed lunch. I can get used to this real quick! ❤ I ended up going to afternoon movie and got a nice sandwich with fries and frozen margarita wth lots of cherries too 樂 I just got call for the free State agency. Set up for tomorrow at 1 pm. YAYYYY!!!

Had my meeting this afternoon with Area Agency on Aging and Ok here is the deal I am offered. I am kind of confused right now but I will pray about it. I am told that I can get home health provider services at no cost to me and the agency will pay $1200. Once the $1200 is paid then no more services until another 2 years. Now I need to figure out what extra days and how many hours I want and try to pick the right agency from the list to go with. From the looks of it this gives me 3 months of free help. Hmmm....I am checking the ratings for each home provider companies that are on the list to choose from and then do the math since each agency on this list all have different prices per hour. Ohhh they will also provide free Ensure for hubby too! They offered to send (I think) a case of Ensure free of charge too!!!

Hope this is ok to post here. If tacky or not permitted I will delete. The bathroom counter was getting to crowded and linen closet was too getting too full since I put diapers, bed pads, towels etc in there for easy access. I was brainstorming and came up with this idea. Our CNA and provider loves it. Everything so handy. Just sharing Well today it's official...I am now paying for 2 home health providers. I was originally told that the 2nd one was $12 an hour but it's actually $13 an hour. Let's hope & pray I can pull this off & can keep them both. Yeah LOL "me" again! 樂 Opinions/comments are needed. Situation is that I had to stop working full-time to take care of my husband with Alzheimer's. Late stages. His sister moved in with us to "help" me with her brother. I really don't get help but that's another long story. We are on a very limited budget. To be honest we only have like $28 left until the beginning of next month. My husband is very limited on the foods that I can feed him. I have to puree his food and there's some foods that he just doesn't care for. I went to the grocery store the other day and bought some frozen Chinese food that I heat up and put it in the food processor and put some broth in it to make it soupy and easier for him to eat. The sister's son, husband's nephew, goes into the freezer last night and ate one of the frozen meals. I very hesitantly told my sister-in- law that it's okay that he eats the food here but please don't be eating the frozen food because that is for her brother. She says well you can just go to the store and buy more! And before I was ready to say well we are on a limited budget she says I'll just go to the store and buy some more. What kind was it? I will make sure to replace it. So my question is was I in the wrong or was I being rude to say something? If a dementia/Alzheimer's patient is to use a walker how are they expected to use it if coordination and focusing on using it can be expected from them? Just wondering because they can't focus and/or have coordination

It's always best to keep something on the open side of the hospital bed. I passed out asleep HARD and woke up to this. He fell over and was stuck for 1 hour. He can't pull himself up or change positions at all. He can't holler out Help!! He's basically nonverbal. I felt so badly that I fell asleep and this was the outcome. I'm so glad I use something to block him in...otherwise he would have fallen onto the floor. By the way, please excuse the disorganized room. Just sharing to give you all something to consider. Safety first Hey everybody you must get this!! So very cool. I was about 6 miles away and can see what's going on at my house and even hear. I'm estactically happy with this investment. (Researcher notice: Monitoring of physical activitiy for cgs) Does anyone know of a good article on how Alzheimer's react to loud noises? I've been googling but can't find one that clearly states it's not good for them. What's the best surveillance camera that can be viewed using your cell phone? Go....

I had a great idea over the weekend. My LO doesn't keep his balance well and last month he actually fell down. Luckily, thank God no broken bones. He will get up from sitting when no one is looking to walk alone in house. My idea was to get the bed alarm and put it where he's sitting and if he gets up the alarm will go off so I know I need to run to him. He got up over the weekend and scared the you know what outta me! Just sharing as I always do! Hope you all are not sick of me by now. Lol I thought today would be just a normal routine day as it started by him saying Hi Babe when I brought breakfast in to him. (Actually him saying Hi Babe wasn't normal. It kinda startled me) He ate well as usual but the remaining of the day just sleeping. He would wake up just enough to eat, diaper change and repositioning him (eyes stayed closed) and he falls back asleep. He did open his eyes a couple of times today but the look in his eyes were different. Late afternoons is typical for me to turn tv on and if he's not looking at it he will play/fiddle with his Teddy bear....not today. Hoping this isn't a new normal. I have no one to talk to so here I am posting here.

When you fall asleep and your dog tries to gently wake you (1st time & weird), I look at my camera app & see my husband's legs all uncovered, Tv still on, his eyes are closed & frowning, I force myself to get up to go to him, I cover his legs & tuck blanket, look at him& pause to analyze the situation, ask are your legs hurting? He replies Yep, gave extra strength liquid Tylenol. Start to go back into other room but ask are you wet? He replies up in a whisper...Yep but yet I want to go back to sleep. I now force myself to wake up to change his diaper. Ugh. Noooo I don't feel like it but yet I have to. Sucks 樂樂

This morning got my man cleaned up. He was waiting for his Strawberry Ensure. He's the love of my life. In couple of weeks his 69th birthday too. I think he looks pretty good for 69. ☺Just sharing. 樂樂樂

It's way past his bedtime. He just there in bed looking at tv and playing with his stuffed animals. I hate treating him like he is a child. It's 10:55 pm and won't sleep until I turn tv off and say time is up mister.

He's napping so I eat lunch. After I'm done eating he still sleeping. I pass out asleep but now he's awake. I need to go to him to clean him up, get him laying on his back, then make him food for supper and I can't get myself together to get it done. I want to go back to sleep but nope no can do. I tell myself get it together lady. He's waiting on you but yet here I am sitting in living room. Ugh

He is sleeping A LOT today. Hate this so much. I miss him so much but yet he is still here with me. He has been having very good night's with sleeping through the night for quite some time but last night nope...He had a restless night. Not sure what was wrong. He was just laying there like in a daze. I felt bad vibes. Asked him what b was wrong...he didn't know..it was almost like he was mad but he said he wasn't. After giving calming meds it took him 2 hours for him to fall asleep which is very strange. Didn't sleep very long. Kept moving throughout the night. 樂

My poor husband..he had been having some decent nights with sleeping and I seriously thought he was almost getting back to his "normal". Last night he barely slept at all..maybe 1 hour total. He ate really good this morning, meds, etc and now his mind won't let him relax and sleep. Hospice Chaplin is on his way (his monthly visit) and hoping that his visit along with the prayer might settle husband down and get some sleep before the CNA shows up in a few hours to get him cleaned up. Ok I give up on trying to get his sleep schedule back to where it was. Its impossible

I'm still trying very hard to get his sleep pattern back to normal but it seems impossible. Sleeps all during the day & awake at night. No worries about him trying to get up as he just lays there or laying there messing with his stuff animals. Makes me so sad and feeling hopeless. Today he has jerked 3 different times as if he's startled and I dont know what to do to help him

The new phase of nothing but him sleeping. Stinks so bad. Not only during the day but also through the night. 樂 He scared me so bad a few minutes ago OMG! He was sleeping so so hard. Nothing I did for a whole 16 minutes straight no response. Yes he was breathing but his mouth was open and total limp. I was freaking out. Got in panic mode the last 2 minutes. I was telling him to stop messing with me and told him he was scaring me. He whispered very softly I'm sorry babe. Whew sigh of relief. Thank God for sparing his life. He was just a plain ole sleepyhead today. He didn't really get any solid food until about 4 in the afternoon. He ate some mushed up meatloaf and some mashed potatoes then that didn't go quite that well so I switched it to a sweet potato smoothie. He drank about three quarters of a cup of the sweet potato and told me he wanted more but I have no more. I'm thinking of giving him a strawberry ensure but I don't know if that mixture is good. Bad mixture?

Ahh man I just thought. Daylight Savings Time is going to mess up my husband's daily schedule! 樂

Earlier I was asking him if he was hungry but I really didn't think he was. He says yes I am. I said well what would you like to eat? He says everything sounds good! So I say we've got soup, I can make you some eggs with beans and I can give you a little bit of avocado on the side. And I said I do have some chorizo and egg but I'm kind of worried to give it to you you might get sick. He says just a minute..... I wait a few seconds thinking he's going to forget and said I want to make you something that will make you happy. His response.... I do too!!! 樂樂樂❤ (I just started him on Benadryl a few nights ago....i think he might be feeling better. Benadryl is one hell of a drug!! 樂樂 Notice all his responses are 3 word sentences! ❤

Does your LO talk in their sleep at night? Not just once or twice but off and on for at least 1 hour or more? Hate it so much when my hubby talks in his sleep for at least 1 hour straight. He will sleep much more today I'm sure

Can you tell if your LO is asleep or awake even though either way their eyes are closed? I can very easily. He's sleeping very sound with his kitty!! ❤樂 Restless nights for my husband and during the day loud family members & their barking dogs need to GO....NOW No more enchiladas that he most truly loves even if I tweek the recipe....not good at all for him. I feel so bad for him Sleepy day. He got his shower with help of 2 CNA's but now I can't wake him. Its after 5 pm. Worried he won't sleep tonight He didn't sleep well last night. Eyes closed but kept fiddling around his hands. Changed him twice in middle of night and still not sleeping this morning.

I came across this post and made me laugh out loud!  I decided to bake and had visions of letting him decorate them w/ sprinkles... all he did was complain about messy kitchen & told me I stink. Today was a strange day. Have your LO's been acting odd today? Full moon? Hmmm

I just wish and pray so much that he could stay awake longer than 2 hours. All he does is sleep 樂樂 Yeah it's me again with another question! My sister-in-law bought the Adkins protein powder for my husband in the late stages of Alzheimer's. He is barely eating anything now. Do you all think that this is a good product to give him? I am doubting it that is a good product Again he was talking in his sleep last night and that is not a normal thing not unless he's feeling very sick. I hope I'm wrong and he will be okay today Good morning everyone I hope you had a nice quiet evening for once. Yes I have another question! My husband has to have soft foods and I have to puree the foods in order to get him to eat but I'm running out of ideas as to what kind of foods I can give him. He's losing so much weight and I don't know what to do to offer him food that he will eat Not a very good day and tonight is the same. Gave nite time meds as usual but he's not sleeping sound. He said he's got stomach ache. Oh Lord. I gave Haladol to see if it would relax him so he can sleep. Changed him & raised his head up good in case it's reflux again. Now is 145 am and I'm waiting to see if he will fall asleep good. What's the best machine to puree foods? I'm using my blender. Anything better? Maybe I am ready for a 5 day break/respite. Sundowning is BS. I made him supper and gently reached for his hands to help him up. He grabbed onto my hands and wouldn't let go. He tried head banging me on my head. Ugh. My nerves are jumping so hard right now He's sleeping so much. 14-17 hours straight thru the night. Get him out of bed at 1030 or 11 am, has breakfast and by 130 nap time again Really odd this morning because he's always needing changed. Always soaked wet but this morning dry. Its really odd. Already about 12 hours straight of sleep too

Yesterday I posted that I hated sundowning. Update from last night: Well the sundowning didn't go away. This morning I needed to get him cleaned up in bed. He was soaked...shirt and all. He was starting to rebel again. We always every day tell each other I love you. This morning I told him but no reply. I asked Do you love me? His reply...Why should I? 樂 (In addition to that he sleeps up to 17 hours straight) he doesn't get up or wake up unless I get him awake or up) I HATE Sundowning. Omg

Concerned....hubby was falling asleep last night and had no supper at all. Got him in bed at 6 pm. I changed him 2 times and here it is 10:20 am...still sleeping. That's already 16 hours straight sleeping. 樂 Frustrating evening. He never stays up this late and has been refusing to go to bed. I'm exhausted and my dog is confused.

He said there was a man standing right there and he just walked by me without saying a word. Then at bedtime he said the man is still here. A little later as we were in bed...He's reaching out with his arm. I ask what are you reaching out for? His eyes are closed and says Those kids are getting all dressed up. I ask Is it a boy or girl? He says there are 2 kids getting dressed up. (Of course not real)

I know I'm a newbie & post quite a bit but here I go again...my LO takes Temazepam 30 mg to help him sleep (I'm told its a sleeping pill)...some nights he passes out asleep and sleeps through the night but more nights than good it doesn't seem to help. I watch him as he lays there and he keeps moving his hands like shaking, puts hands out like he's reaching out for something and pulling at the blanket. He sometimes takes covers off but then tries to cover back up soon after. It takes him a long time to settle down. What do you all think about this situation? His birthday went ok. He loves tamales so I got creative & got 2 tamales, put in blender & pureed them with beef broth...made it like tamale soup, got half avocado, his juice drink and he absolutely loved it. I had told him several times I made a strawberry cake. No reaction really to me telling him about the cake throughout the day. My daughter, granddaughter left. & I got his crazy old cat out of the bathroom (I keep her in there cuz she's always in the way meowing her head off...She's super old) while I was still feeding him I then realized ooops, told him i be back in minute...ran into kitchen & put food away real quick. I come back to him & he looks at me & says Did you get what you went for? (7 word sentence to my shockingly surprise!) I pause & say Yes. He replies What? I think what is he thinking?! I reply back with are you wanting your birthday cake? His reply....opened his mouth like a little baby bird. 樂樂 I get his cake and warm up some milk. Poured the milk into the cake to soften it and easier for him to swallow. He LOVED it so much! Happy accomplishment!! I took pics afterwards but they didn't turn out so well since it seemed all that pigging out made him sleepy. Here's a few that I took. Suggestions please... Hubby stage 7, bedridden, sleeps a lot but at times he's awake when it is normal time for him to be sleeping, doesn't hardly talk unless spoken to, tomorrow is his 69th birthday. I'm thinking of baking a strawberry cake but what else? I'm broke too. June 1984 on our wedding day (with his Mom may she still RIP) and 2nd pic June 2019. Still madly in love (2nd pic was our 35th anniversary)

I am hopeful everyone has a good 4th tonight. I'm sure not looking forward to it at all with neighbors going crazy with fireworks. My husband will for sure get his calming meds tonight while I try my best to keep my 2 dogs calm. It's going to be rough. God just keeps blessing me! My testimony!! Well today is our 35th wedding anniversary and I'm praying it's going to be a good day. My son gave me a $25 gift card to Applebee's for my birthday so my plan is to get to go food and have a candle light dinner in the bedroom with him tonight. I'm trying to keep a positive attitude today. Again I'm hoping & praying that he will have a very good day on our day. 樂樂樂 I told him this morning that today was my birthday. He understood completely! He says aww man! I then asked him so what are you going to give me for my birthday today? He puckered up his lips! I got kisses for my birthday from my hubby ain't that so sweet?!! 樂樂樂樂樂 Here's Father's Day so far. Hope it gets better and hope all of your day goes great. Happy Father's Day to Everyone 38 blissful years with my love. Next month will be 35 years of marriage. To death do us part ❤ He doesn't understand that today is Mother's Day but I'm making the best of it. HAPPY VALENTINES TO EVERYONE! Even though we feel so alone on this special day lets all try to make it a great day by being with our loved ones and shower them with love & kisses. I know I will have a hard time with this, as this will be my first Valentines Day with him not really knowing what day it truly is. 樂樂樂樂 May we all have a blessed day.

Our son gave this stuffed tiger to him for Christmas and he really loves it surprisingly. The other night while he was in the bed, he's bedridden now, but he had the Tiger in his hand and he was very gently putting the tiger to his lips and was very gently giving the tiger a kiss on the nose! It was like it was so passionate and gentle that I got jealous of that tiger! LOL. I wanted to be that tiger!

How did you all handle New Year's? I was so freaking heartbroken and sad last night especially when it struck midnight. He wasn't there. He was already in bed. I went to him to kiss him & tell him happy New year but it of course wasn't the same. I wanted to lay down beside him but he was having anxiety because of the fireworks. I knew better than to lay beside him and hug on him because I figured He might hurt me. His hands were clinched holding the blanket. I walked away crying. For 37 years straight without fail he always made sure he was with me so we would kiss, hug, say happy New year and tell me that he loves me. Not this time....I was alone. 樂 Hope you all have a happy New year and that you got your kiss & hug from your Love One at midnight. I got a kiss, hug & a I love you for 37 years straight but not this year for me.

I was so concerned and worried that Christmas day would possibly not go well for my hubby but it actually went very well! He stayed up for 1 hour longer than usual and ate very well. I'm so happy that it turned out as well as it did. ❤ I was feeding him chocolate cake & another piece that was vanilla...he ended up picking up that small piece of vanilla cake & popped it in his mouth. Ended up with frosting on his fingers! Haha To All...hope everyone has a pleasant merry Christmas with your LOs. May your LOs have a great day with family and smiles from them. 樂樂 Today it wasn't safe to get him out of bed so I decided to put the baby Christmas tree in bedroom with him. I think he likes it. 樂樂 How are you going to prevent lots of doorbell ringing on Halloween night? We currently have 4 dogs in house too = Anxiety for LO Temperature of 99.7 considered high? I tried googling it and for some odd reason nothing came up on search

Has anyone used this product and if so what are your opinions on the effectiveness of its claims? I was giving a product called Bone Up that worked very well for my hubby but was upsetting his stomach so it seemed. Ugly frown/hiccup/yuck! I had not given it to him for at least 1 month (was taking 3 times a day) but over weekend I just gave him 1 and there was that frown/hiccup/yuck episode. Trying to figure out what to get to help him without being prescribed muscle relaxers or prescription pain meds. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B071X6YZ4B?ref_=ams_ad_dp_ovrl

Update in case you all need to know on teeth clicking. Nurse said he heard no bowel sounds in his abdomen. I'm guessing the teeth clicking is something new to let me know something is wrong. If clicking keeps going I'm to increase dose of his Haladol to 0.5 every 4 hours & increase Lactulose twice today. What fun I will have today! 樂 (I might need longer gloves up to my elbows today!) Just kidding 樂樂樂 I tell him that I needed to put nasal spray in his nose. He said Ok. I shake the bottle and tell him again to be sure he hasn't already forgotten. I say Ok Now....squirt the spray in his nose and he says WHAT ARE YOU DOING???? 樂 Cracked me UP. (He rarely talks) I think he was wanting more yogurt & just didn't understand what I was going to do. Funny 樂樂 Ok 1 more post before I start hubby's day. Has anyone used a product called Bone Up? It's amazing!!! Seriously

This morning....not so good. He was sleeping so so hard that his mouth was dropped open. It took me a while to barely get him to respond/wake up. From 845 am to 1040 is how long it took me to get him cleaned up. Changed diaper, pad, shirt...the whole 9 yards. (Figure of speech right there!) I only got him to take maybe 4 SIPS of his favorite strawberry Ensure with banana. He fell back to sleep super hard with his mouth dropped open. Can't give his prostate meds, reflux meds, muscle relaxer, Tylenol (made reaction that his neck hurts) or his laxative. I'm praying that he will wake up enough soon so I can give his meds that he truly needs. He's declining a little bit more since a week ago and I HATE this crap! 樂樂樂

Nasal spray (Ocean Spray) or humifier? For nasal congestion. He doesn't know how to blow his nose 樂

This is my trick this morning with my husband. He wouldn't open his mouth quite big enough for his food. I thought for a minute and came up with this.. I crushed his pills, put it in a little medicine measuring cup, then I poured some Kool-Aid in it and let it dissolve. I can't give him juice because of acid reflux.Then I got a syringe and sucked it up in it and he took it like that! I'm pretty clever huh?! Question..hubby takes 30 ml twice a day of liquid laxative, i use benefiber 2 times a week & give foods with fiber. He doesn't walk anymore but constipated. He told me last evening while I was trying to get him to eat & said he needed to go. I took him to bedroom & nothing there. What would you do? I hope I don't read suppositories!

Has anyone's LO gotten sick with congestion and then started with hiccups that didn't go away unless they are given Reglan (which doesn't seem to help completely) and the use of Halagon? I've been researching by Google and getting different answers. Since this is the case I thought I could ask you all. There's a new rule in my house!! If anyone is even slightly sick either put on a face mask & wash your hands or Stay Away! So lots of people say Seroquel is a great med and my hubby got his 1st dose last night. He fell asleep pretty quick. He was having some hiccup sounds several times last night. I just done Google search for side effects and I read that one side effect is a risk of death by dementia patients. That concerns me. Any comments about this? Am I freaking out or overthinking this?

Everyone if you can somehow don't forget to take care of yourselves too. After many years of not seeing a doctor, last month I was going thru severe depression I agreed to get lab work done. Results are in....saw Dr yesterday & was told I'm definitely diabetic, my cholesterol is really bad with all my bad cholesterol is high & good cholesterol is low. Even thyroid isn't too great either. Depression med is being raised to 300 mg which is the highest it can be prescribed. Final solution is being prescribed 6 meds and being more careful with my diet. Try to make time for you If at all possible. We can't take care of our LO's if we get sick. ❤ Its nap time. Now for me to have some ME time for at least 1 hour. Then lunch. Sharing once more. Just in case no one knows of this check out Careblazers. Dr has videos on lots of dementia & Alzheimer's subjects. Very informative Looks like Milk of Magnesia will be given today. 4 days with no BM. He takes liquid laxative everyday but not working Yay!!! I'm back. I was blocked for several days from commenting on any post. It was killing me! Not sure why though I'm so thankful that I found this group. Such a blessing Sorry for this dumb question but what is LO?

This morning I was getting things ready to take care of my hubby. On radio the song I Saw The Light was on. I was softly singing along. His eyes closed as normal. I kept singing. I finally asked Do you like this song? He opens his eyes really fast and frowned! I busted out laughing. I said Awe come on this is a church song! He just looked at me funny with his eyes like saying You are Nuts. 樂樂 I caught him like this last night. Priceless in my book! (researcher remark: photo where he is sleeping with a teddy bear)

This was the day before thanksgiving. I couldn't figure out why he had those hiccups so badly. (It got worse and with all those hiccups it was hurting him. He would grab his chest) The following day he was so super sick. It was so bad that I thought God was going to take him. 4 days of this and it was figured out that it was acid reflux. Just sharing in case anyone's loved one experiences this. Thank God his life was spared

Music therapy all the way!

I'm waiting for the weekly visit from hospice nurse today at 11and he's still not here (now going on 11:15). He just better hurry his butt up. Gotta feed my man and I'm out of here at 1 when provider comes. Hate this It bothers me that my husband's one & only sister basically threw him to the dogs. She lives in our neighborhood & its been over 3 weeks since she visited him. I do like it that everything is so stress and drama free now but still so wrong. She will be so sorry

Today is the day to call agency thru state to reapply for the free in-home respite help. Hope it's going to be easy to get approved again since we already received the assistance before. 樂 Hospice came this morning to give this to hubby for their Veterans Honor Program. Very nice. He was sleeping at the time though. At least he is acknowledged for his service in Air Force. He served during peacetime so he hardly gets any benefits. On Monday Sept 15th at 645 pm our daughter had her baby! We are officially grandparents! It's bittersweet though. While my heart is so FULL of love that tears leak out of my eyes. The part that hurts my heart is that my husband wasn't there to share this most beautiful precious moment. He hasn't met her yet because the baby was just released yesterday. She had jaundice and lab results were too high to let her go home with momma the day before. Hoping we get a good part of his day so he can see and meet our beautiful granddaughter. SIL as most of you know is a total disrespectful Bitch again wasn't there to help out by being there with him while I was with our daughter. My daughter needed me there. We are super close and is on social security disability for social anxiety. On Sunday the water broke and i immediately tried getting in touch with SIL (she bought a house right just the street from us too "help" with her brother) but she had more important things to do like going to the cemetary to visit her mom's (my MIL) grave instead. We were on our own. I was forced to get home health agency to send provider to stay the night and other days prior because again SIL refused to help. I haven't calculated the total cost but my best guess is close to $600. I am self employed and rarely can i work. She knows this but doesn't care. My final decision is no more and I'm Yesterday my son in law came to change the battery on smoke alarm. While working on it the alarm went off LOUD saying FIRE FIRE. This went on for a good almost 2 minutes. Hubby just laid there in bed with absolutely no reaction. This happened not only once but twice and nothing....no reaction. Breaks my heart 樂樂

If you know me I've had a few issues with fill-in providers in the past. I decided to have these on my wall for instructions. Just thought I would share in case you need to do the same. I don't understand what a hospice volunteer is for. I needed a volunteer to come for a little over 1 hour until my provider shows up but I'm told that the volunteer can't come if I'm leaving. Huh? So if I can't leave then why would I need a volunteer for? Smh Me: I tell SIL at 330 he needs diaper changed & fed lunch. He didn't eat well at breakfast. Immediately after he eats he falls asleep.

SIL: Shows up at 4 (she was coming to relieve me) I changed him and fed him his entire lunch since she was late. *she hardly ever comes to help me*

Note: at my house everyone and I mean everyone must call or text before coming to the door. We have 2 dogs that get really loud. She knows this.

SIL: 10 minutes prior calls and says she's coming. No warning when she does get here.

He is falling back to sleep. She arrives and just opens the door without warning. Dogs start barking their heads off. Of course that scares the heck outta him. My one dog barks REALLY loud.

Me: now I'm pissed running to bedroom door to get dog out of room and close door. I told her that he was falling asleep. She says Oh really already?!!

Me: YES I told you that is what he does.

SIL: Well i told you I was coming and I was on the phone.

Me: well next time end the conversation & call me first before just walking in. (I have a big note on door saying DO NOT KNOCK...DO NOT RING DOORBELL)

I leave for about 2 1/2 hours. He kept trying to sleep but she kept messing with him. He was exhausted by 730 pm. He typically stays awake at least by 9. My poor husband. 樂樂

I get about a 30 minute ME break time. Trimmed mustache ✔ Shaved face ✔ Gave 1 Strawberry Ensure ✔ Changed diaper ✔ Put him on His side ✔ After 30 minutes or so hospice nurse comes to reassess him to see if he still qualifies for hospice assistance. So I noticed I have a missed call today and I returned the call. I had no idea who I was calling. It was a nurse to re-certify him for hospice. She has to come every 3 months to recertify. She asked me is anybody going to be home tomorrow afternoon between 1 and 4? My reply well of course there will be I will never leave him home alone. He is in no shape to be left home alone whatsoever! To be honest I thought that was a stupid question It's going on 2 weeks since my SIL came to visit my husband. She lives in our neighborhood. Less than a 2 minute drive. Hurts my feelings for him. yeah, yeah, yeah!! its me AGAIN! Vent time if you all don't mind! I texted pictures of yesterday's celebration to my husband's cousin in California. He see's them and says He looks really good. I don't understand why he cannot get up. this absolutately burns me UP! This cousin is a dentist and this runs in their family...and then he asks a stupid question such as this? I had to send him a few links to read up on for his education. What an idiot! OK...I am done...for now! Has anyone experienced something such as this? I tell my sister-in-law that the best time to come to visit her brother is any day before 12 noon but her understanding is that I don't want her in my house anymore! I won't argue with the fact that she rarely comes over because it's so much peaceful over here and by the way my husband is 90% better than he was when she lived with us for seven whole months of hell but it's just mind-boggling to me that she interprets what I said as I don't want her here anymore I sure hope & pray provider comes today. She took off Friday & 3 days in a row without help is hard on me. Pray with me plz Ugh....his sister came over this morning & again at 5. This evening he's getting pissed at me and started getting a little violent. Yeah...its proven she still causes anxiety & stress. Haldol to the rescue it was. Took me about 5 minutes to get my hands on it to give to him. 樂

Vent Time! So I've been telling SIL that the best time to visit her brother is before noon. From 1230 to 2 is the time he falls asleep. She knows his sleep problems as well. Yesterday she comes over when she knows I'm not home and comes at 330 pm and is in bedroom for 20 minutes talking with my provider. It was all about her. He is trying to sleep. He is tired. Burns me up!

Thanks for letting me vent and not get booted off this group. Lol New provider will be here in about 20 minutes. I'm having a little anxiety. Prayers Please!

Well I'm working on his sleep habits and schedule and it's not really working out very well. I'm keeping it louder in his bedroom with his favorite music and the lights on and keep going in there to him to try and wake him up. I feel so bad doing this but this is my only option. The good news is oh, is that the state agency Home Health provider office called and they found another home health aide that is bilingual and she starts on Friday of this week. Please everyone pray that this new provider works out and he accepts her. I'm so excited and trying to contain myself! I so need this relief because I feel like I am slowly dying

Vent time!! Sorry guys...yeah it is ME again! When you tell your SIL that supposedly loves and cares SO much for her brother that blood was coming out of his mouth and tell her that I was waiting on hospice nurse to show up to help me figure out why, wouldn't you think she would call me back to find out what happened? She asked me to call her after nurse came and I did but she didn't answer her phone. I didn't leave phone message (she doesn't listen to messages) but instead I text her saying Call me when you get a minute. The entire day went by and no phone call or reply back by text. I find that very offensive. Another thing is that when we were talking on the phone in the morning, during conversation I asked if she could stay with her brother for about 30 minutes so I could go to grocery store and she said she would. I told her that her brother is running out of certain things. She never came. I had to do an online grocery shopping with delivery. While delivery is very cool but it is at least $13 more and I could have saved that $13 if I went to the store myself. Didn't happen, cuz in my opinion she doesn't give a Cats Meow!

The Area Agency on Aging agency sent his Ensure they promised! This is crazy insane! Total amount is 336 containers of it! 樂 I done price research online and this is at least $175 worth of Ensure. Woe!! Nurse came yesterday as usual. He measured top part of his arm. Nurse said 2 weeks ago it measured 21.5 inches but now it measured 18 inches. I know it determines weight loss but wonder how much less he actually weighs. How would we know how much that is in his actual weight? He's bedridden so we can't get him on the scales standing up For the past 6 months my hubby was going downhill and going fast but since now his sister, her son and 2 loud dogs have moved out he is much better. It isn't a coincidence I dont think since he's more calm and even last night he slept all night long. Not even movement. The Nest camera didn't record any movement at all last night. He even took 3 drinks of his smoothie all by himself this evening. Loving this so much. I truly believe quietness where your LO's are makes a huge difference. It's something else when his sister thinks her 2 rambunctious disobedient LOUD dogs are more important than her brother sickens me Slowly but surely hubby getting better than the day before. On Friday hospice staff & primary Dr coming for family visit. Not sure what to expect but looking forward to it I'm feeling so incredibly blessed. The Chaplin from the hospice home health agency dropped this off for us for v thanksgiving dinner!! Blows my mind!! ❤❤

I had been sick since Sunday but yesterday was worse. Told my SIL that she had her work cut out for her today (yesterday) She had to get my hubby out of bed, brush his teeth, make him breakfast, get him in living room for his tv, lunch and dinner. Everything except bathroom and diaper duty. Now I'm sure she sees the light and hopefully understands what I go through every single day but she got the easy part but I'm sure she thinks it was so hard. He seemed to be angry with me since I was in bed the whole day

The struggle was real this morning. Went to check on him because I knew he needed changing. To my surprise he was soaking wet shirts and all. I couldn't get him up since he couldn't wake up completely. I took care of the situation all by myself. Took me about 30 minutes to get done even though his sister was upstairs sleeping. She says it's too intimate and refuses to help. She's here because she says she wants to "help" me but this isn't help at all. Ok Sorry venting is done. By the way I'm huffing & puffing tired now

I hope everyone has a good day today. Its time for me to get my husband up out of bed. His CNA and nurse are coming between 1130 & 1. I always make sure he is already up with breakfast & meds way before they show up. He needs to be fully awake beforehand.

So today the home health provider accidentally put a disposable under pad that has gel in it inside my washing machine along with laundry. Now I'm on my tip toes trying to reach inside the tub to get all of it out. Praying my washing machine isn't going to get plugged up and break. Ugh

I hate it when a replacement CNA came today and was so impersonable in how she was handling my husband. What she didn't know is that I have a video camera in bedroom. I'm very upset

If you all have a CNA that assists with bathing your LO please double check after they leave. My hubby fell asleep afterwards as he usually does after his bed bath and I didn't realize until a couple of hours later this.... 樂樂 the diaper was on way too tight. He can't tell me that he's in pain at all as this proves it I told my hubby's CNA when putting on his diaper to be sure his private is in down position. Well she forgot again today. He peed and got the disposable pad and shirt all wet. Talk about a major workout for both of us. He was trying to help me the best he could. Another bad part is that I gave him all his night time meds before realizing how wet he really was. Meds started kicking in and Oh Boy that was rough. Thank God that's over with Click click clicking of his teeth. Drives me insane. His teeth are loose and worries me to no end. Does anyone's LO do the same and if so what/how do you handle it? Hello everyone. It's been a while since my last post. Have a question... Anyone's LO grind their teeth? My husband grinds so HARD & I don't know why. His teeth are loose and wonder if they bother him but then on the other hand I'm wondering if it's stress-related, anxiety. If your loved ones do that what have you done to help relieve the situation? Another issue...loose teeth & he keeps grinding them. They gonna pop out! 樂 I was getting him ready for bed for the night. Radio on...Freddy Fender singing When The Next Teardrop falls. He sings in English and Spanish. My husband would always translate to me. He wanted to translate but stopped. I read his mind that he wanted to. Brought tears to my eyes. The look in his eyes were priceless. 樂樂 I miss him so much. 樂樂

Have you experienced your LO to have freezing feet but yet the upper extremities be all hot and sweaty? Does anyone know why blisters appear on the butt? I'm using the skin protecting barrier cream from hospice but they burst and new ones appear Fed him lunch. He ate very well. Fell asleep. I go check on him & he's frowning. Ask are you ok? He finally answered and said "my Mom". I said You thinking about your Mom? He said My Mother. I told him I loved her too & gave a gentle kiss. I walked out of room since his eyes were by then closed. I pray he's forgotten by now. 樂 His Mom passed in 1997. Has anyone experienced this with your loved one? I was working with him this morning to get him cleaned up and I found this with no real answers as to why. I know at about 3:30 this morning he coughed that's the only sign that I saw but the cough wasn't super hard or anything (Research notice: Photo - Wounds on the face) Now dealing with bed sore. OMG 樂 How things change so quickly. The first pic was taken exactly 1 year ago today and second just about 3 weeks ago (bedridden since beginning of January this year). 樂樂 I didn't realize that with Alzheimer's the brain is shrinking...I thought it was just slowly dying. That makes a huge difference in my mind. 樂 I'm scared everyone. Yesterday he slept a lot as usual but the difference I saw yesterday is that he had this weird look in his eyes. Hard to explain but kind of like a dazed distant look in his eyes. I talk to him with yes & no questions but no answer. He would always 95% of the time be able to answer me. I was gently hugging on him and kept telling him that everything was going to be alright. I kept asking him during the day was he okay, what's wrong and all I would get from him was this strange look in his eyes. Several times throughout the day when he was awake and eyes opened I will try to get eye contact with him but he wouldn't do it, he look away in another Direction. Later in the evening when I was changing him I again was telling that everything was going to be okay because I knew there was something wrong I didn't know what. At that time or maybe a minute or two I got a lucid moment from him and he's whispering to me sayimh "I'm very very sorry" I told him I'm keeping my promise that I'm going to take care of him and everything's going to be okay. Please help me pray that today will not be like yesterday and everything's going to be okay for a while longer because I know it breaks our hearts to lose our loved ones to see them go through this crap but oh God I'm not ready for him to go anywhere 樂樂 Has your LO had a congested sounding cough but hospice nurse says his lungs are clear? Wondering why this is. Its been going on for several weeks. Failed to mention that its random

Does your LO almost always keep their eyes closed? When mine is awake he will answer but won't open his eyes. Several times he will tell me that his eyes are open but nope they are closed This morning as the scheduled routine goes, I go to him and say in a cheerful voice (even though I still feel yucky sick) I say with a smile in my voice... Good Morning! He opens his eyes and says Who are you? I first thought he was joking but looking in his eyes I could tell he wasn't joking. I tell him who I am and we been together for almost 40 years...I talked about our 2 kids. I give him a little kiss, fed breakfast and afterwards asked him who am I? He replies I don't know. 樂 Feeling sad. Our son & wife came to visit today. They hardly ever come but only for birthdays and holidays. When my son went into our bedroom to see him my son said Hi Dad. How are you? My husband replied I'm not your Dad. My son said Yes you are my Dad. Husband gently shook his head No. Less than 30 seconds later my son walked out of bedroom. Broke my heart

He says he loves me but doesn't know my name 樂

I ended up crying yesterday when the social worker came for a visit. She was talking to my husband in Spanish to see if he could communicate better but found out that he didn't know who I was. He knew I was someone important because I take care of him but really didn't know. (We been together since 1981 and just had our 34th wedding anniversary in June)The home we live in that we both bought together...he said it wasn't his home...it was his Moms home. His Mom passed in 1997..she had alzheimers & Parkinson's. He knew we are in San Antonio but didn't know where he was born (Kansas). I thought he was having a good day but apparently not. Breaks my heart into a million pieces

If I could just see him walk in the room where I'm at and say Hey babe. What are you doing? OR just to hear him joke around and hear him laugh OR him sneak up behind me and while radio is playing that song by for example Lou Rawls...You'll Never Find Another Love Like Mine and he turns me around to slow dance with me while singing it to me would be so amazing. Missing my husband...my real husband once again

Can someone go to my husband and change his diaper with possibly changing his shirt and the pad. Then after that's all done make his breakfast and feed him. Then 30 minutes later put him on his side?? I'm tired just thinking about it. Ugh. Here I go...no one else here to do it. It's really concerning when i get sick and don't have help with my husband on days no one is scheduled to come. I might have shingles. I don't know yet. It hurts so bad.

Guess today I'm having my own pity party by myself. Feeling lonely. In this house with my husband here but yet I'm alone. No escape until Monday afternoon. I had a dream last night that my husband got better and was walking around looking for me. He wanted me to stop being with these people in the house and go with him back to bed so we could cuddle. I didn't want that dream to end. ❤樂 So I'm busy with things & feel guilty not being in here with him. Again its like I'm not there. He just lays there looking at tv and fiddling with a pillow and his stuffed animal. I try talking to him. I barely get an answer. I'm trying to be ok but it is really hard. Another day...another headache with stress trying to figure things out. Prayers requested please and thank you! You all have a much better day than me. Good morning. Time to start my day. Stalled long enough...my lower back is hurting but I gotta do what I gotta do. Have a great day everyone

I notice that I'm always wearing the color gray. I wondered why. I looked it up & the color gray means timeless & practical color that is often associated with loss & depression. Wow that's something else! 樂

I'm seriously starting to get sad well sadder.... all he's wanting to do is sleep. Yes I know it's part of it but it's just so much more. Here it is 3 in the afternoon and he still sound asleep. I can't get any solid food down him other than one meal a day later in the evening. During the day all I can get is smoothies down him but I have to wake him up and keep trying persistently to get him to wake up to drink it. I do this because I know he needs to nutrition and I do not want him to get dehydrated. Just had to post this to relieve some anxiety that I'm starting to get Reading old notes. This one made me cry. (By the way I'm Mic)

I cried today. Since 2001 I was self employed being a mobile notary. I worked with title companies to go to borrowers for real estate transactions as a signing agent. For years hubby would go n with me on road trips. He would wait in our vehicle while I was getting the closing completed. While on these road trips we would have a great time listening to our favorite CDs and laugh and talk about whatever. Well today I traveled by myself for a closing that was 1 hour away. He was sleeping in bed while I went this morning. I thought I was ok but not until I got to the town I was going to. The tears started flowing because of all the memories. It was so hard to keep it all inside until after I got done with people I was meeting with. I didn't realize how much I miss those good times and now they are gone. I'm over here feeling lonely and sorry for myself. All he is wanting to do is sleep

To those who have LOs in early stages you are Blessed! Don't forget that it could be much worse. Hugs

I just hate it when I see changes and it worries me to no end and family just thinks I'm calling Wolf. They think I'm exaggerating. Now I have to puree all foods to where it's drinkable. Otherwise the food (which is always soft and/or pureed) doesn't go down right. Its like he's getting choked. He hasn't spoken hardly any words for almost 1 month and yesterday he started talking saying "there's the Head Crew" (his work...retired in 2013), then said with sort of a smile "did you see that?" And pointed. Later something about a Cop. Last time he started talking like this was when he was super sick. Also last time yeah it was way overboard with the talking nonsense non-stop. Scares me. The expression or look on his face is more distinguished. I mean the look in his eyes, the way he holds his mouth...it's more of ... I don't know how to explain in words but I see a decline. I'm not freaking out totally but worried, scared, afraid of being alone, not knowing what I'm gonna do without him when God takes him. I will be so so lost. Thanks if you read this entire post. I am sure you all get it and understand where I'm coming from. Hugs to everyone of you. May you ALL have it as a good day. 樂樂樂 You know I'm sitting here in my living room with my husband in the bed still sleeping and I'm thinking to myself if something happened to me what would happen to him. He has a sister that's less than 2 minutes away and here it is the weekend and I have nobody to help me. I ended up hurting my lower left back and thank God for hot showers LOL! But again the thought enters my mind if something happened to me who would take care of him when the home providers are not here? May God be with all of the single caregivers that are in this alone You know there are times that I postpone getting him changed. Not for long but I got to take care of myself in order to take care of him the right way. I feel guilt when I do this but I got to take care of me first. Do you all do that? Since Monday of this week my hubby so so sick. On Thanksgiving day I thought God was taking him away. He's been in bed since Thursday. 4th day today and I'm getting really super scared. I can't handle this very well at all. 樂 Hallucinations suck. He randomly says Those trucks are too close while watching tv. There were no trucks. Medicine time 樂

Oh the changes come when least expected. 樂樂 Well this evening as I was getting him ready to settle down for the night for no apparent reason he was having anxiety. Instead of giving him the Haldol I decided to have the Google iHome play ocean sounds. It's working!!! 1st he says he's sleepy then 6 minutes later I am being looked at with a glare in his eyes & not answering me. Ok I walk away. Lol

It's hard when you go above and beyond to make sure your loved one is being cared for properly and always thinking about him to make sure everything's okay. I've given up everything in life that I found enjoyment in and then while I'm feeding him his lunch and then he grabs your arm and says he wants to hit you, oh it hurts like a sob. Feeling so disrespected but know it's the freaking Alzheimer's. Since he was Still being moody and I'm sure he's tired due to the bed bath that he got from the CNA and I saw that his mood was not changing...it was Haladol to the rescue! Time away for now for me in the other room until it kicks in This Alzheimer's crap sure takes its twists and unexpected turns...you just never know from one day to the next what will happen. Last night when I assumed he was sleeping as he always is I peek in bedroom to check on him. Most times he's uncovered and sound asleep. I see he's covered. I was going to close door and hear....COME ON IN! Scared the crap outta me. I jumped so hard. Note: he doesn't really talk much and when he does its a whisper. That's his norm I HATE it so much when he tries to physically hurt me when all I'm doing is taking care of him. This is not who he is or was. 樂

He had a rough day yesterday. Hardly ate anything. Didn't sleep sound and took him a while to settle/calm down. Hoping today is better. 樂

Enraged and trying to hurt me. Changing diaper and my hand is grabbed with my fingers being bent backwards. Enraged eyes. 樂

He is looking at my shoes on the floor and says IT STOPPED. I ask What stopped? His reply THE CAR!! Oh ok I say. Then I gently hugged on his head & said I love you. His reply...and YOU shut up!

So as always I'm helping hubby while he's eating. I gave him a small piece of flour tortilla and I had done it a few times before and it went well but the last time I gave him a piece of the tortilla I put it in his mouth and he says you put plastic in my mouth! I told him I would never put plastic in your mouth and that it was just a piece of tortilla. He took the tortilla and he threw it on my plate and says I don't want that樂 Can anyone recommend a very thick depend type underwear? My mom is no longer just needing them for leaks but full on incontinence. 樂 thank you!! My sweet mommy...I snuck in snickers and M&M’s!!! Mom had a great day today. I’m so thankful and blessed that she hasn’t lost her sweet disposition and sense of humor. She still tells me “ your funny” Mom had a great day today!!!! She was smiling and gave me kisses. I think the Snickers I snuck into her care center really helped. 樂

What a great afternoon with mom. She was happy, lucid and laughed at my jokes. Mom wanted to go outside yesterday. I caught her enjoying the sun on her sweet face. If you notice my necklace it is in support of my mom “Daisy” ❤樂❤樂 My sisters and I had a great visit with my sweet mom, Daisy on her 80th birthday. She was quiet, but recognized everyone. She enjoyed watching a slide show we made of her life over and over. She kept saying she misses her mom and dad 樂

Well..getting ready to do the “right thing,” and take mom to visit graves. It’s so exhausting. And somehow ended up my job because none of my siblings will do it. It takes forever to get her ready and I have to pack an “adult diaper” bag for accidents. I literally pray she doesn’t have to go the bathroom during the 3 hour long adventure. I now just tell her every five minutes where we are going and doing before she asks because the fear and anxiety is constantly on her face Then getting her in the wheelchair and in and out of my car is a workout. But it’s all worth it when I ask “are you ok mama? And she says ‘I think I need a kiss.’” Does anyone struggle getting help from siblings Woo hoo. Unplanned shower was not very easy but a success none the less. My back is killing me and on fire but when I told her she needed a shower soon she said that’s fine when I had time to help her. I said right now really thinking she would put it off lol. But Let’s go lol. And we got it done. Have to celebrate the small stuff. It’s bath day and it’s not going so well. I hate this. I hate watching her deteriorate like this over time. Some times I wished I would have know years ago what this was gonna be like. I would have made more memories and done stuff differently with my MIL. I would have learned as much as I could and prepared myself physically and mentally for this. But when they more or less get dropped in ur lap there’s not much you can do I guess. Mom and I after making a fast appointment for her gums. 樂 does anyone else have an issue of their LO using a metal fork as a tooth pick? My MIL fell! Thank the Lord she is ok except when she scraped her hand. I fixed her up but definitely want to call the dr tomorrow. I feel so bad for her. She loves her some whataburger.

Well for the last few weeks my MIL didn’t want to eat cause she thinks some one told her she needed to lose weight and that she was taking advantage of me with food. So her solution to the problem...stop eating and she would lose weight. Wrong. Lol. Well I went and got the CBD gummies and told her that they are weight loss pills in gummy form so she wouldn’t have to take a hard pill. Lmao forgive me for lying. I tell her now that if she eats all the food on her plate I will be able to give her her weight loss meds. Now she eats more and gets a gummy. Next I will just buy gummy bears and put in the jar. 樂樂樂樂 what ever I have to do to get her to eat more I will do it! Mom actually decided to go get dinner with me. I was shocked. It was slow going but we went to where else? Whataburger lol. Who wouldn’t want that smile to stay around longer !? Even though moms knees have been killing her she has wanted to get out of the house with me for the last 3 days. Never got out of the car and that’s ok. Lol. We got chick fil a Tuesday and whataburger today. Not sure if it will work but mom really wants a bath to soak in. 樂God please give me the strength for that. Lol. Showers are so much easier. Lol every moment is a blessing.

Since her tooth/jaw hurts I decided on homemade potato soup for dinner. Hey Mikey she likes it lol.

Playing around today. Lol as momma say “ we ain’t misbehaving, we’re just having fun “ lol (photos adjusted with funny art drawings - app)

Normally I think I can do anything by myself. And the hardest thing for me to do is ask for help. But after giving mom her shower I realize I just can’t bathe her alone anymore. 樂樂樂I pride myself on trying to do all I can for her but I can’t do this anymore for her. I’m gonna have to get help or start sponge bathing her. And no...I will never put her in a nursing home. I won’t do that to her.

Today has been completely exhausting. After mom fell she was real sore so I took her to the dr. Her wrist is so bruised. And her knees are extremely in pain. It broke my heart to put her thru xrays today and all he had to deal with but I needed to make sure she was ok. She cried from pain of laying on table. We had so many issues of using the bathroom, her having to get up and down etc. and on top of all that she wouldn’t eat today. I’m am mentally and physically exhausted. But when she looks at me and says I love you and thanks for all I do for her it all makes it worth it. 樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂 Really need some good vibes today. I feel like crap. Having trouble taking care of myself and MIL has a dentist appointment today. I just want to crawl back in bed and so does she. 樂樂樂. If she didn’t need this so bad to find out what is making her hurt I would let her go back to bed.

I’m frustrated and tired. All my MIL wants to do is sleep. She doesn’t want to eat. She doesn’t drink enough fluids I think and sleeping 23/24 hours a day I’m sure is not good for her. I have tried everything. Last week I got diagnosed with an autoimmune thing and I’m constantly exhausted. She wants to use her fork as a toothpick. I don’t know what else to do. I know she has to be in stage 6 at least. And I know this is to be expected but to be honest some days lately I just want to say fine don’t eat. She will eat when she gets hungry enough. And then I feel like crap for feeling that way. I’m exhausted. I have my own health issues to deal with right now and I’m blessed she is still here. Sorry for venting My emotions are all over the place. I’m so ready for vacation the 20-28. When u have so many emotions going on at once I think it actually starts to affect my body and stuff. I want to complain, I want to be happy. I feel sad and frustrated and sometimes I just cry. I’m to the point where I don’t know how to help her. I love my MIL. My husband is a hot shot driver and This week my husband is going to Florida and is taking me with him for a short break. His 19 year old daughter is coming to stay with mom and my step son. I know she is responsible and stuff but I feel like a mom leaving her child for the first time. I know hubby and I need a break and to spend time together but I worry. Am I crazy to feel this way. Lately I have been feeling more like a mom to her instead of her daughter. I see her changing week to week. I feel so helpless. I don’t know how to help MIL. Her bladder hurts. Her knees hurt. She is in so much pain. I can’t give her any more pain pills and she just got off bladder infection meds just a couple of days ago. It’s hurting my heart that I can’t help her anymore than I have today

I think it’s finally hitting me that my MIL is.just not the same woman she was when I met her 5 years ago. I know she still has a lot of time left here but watching her earlier nodding off on the couch and seeing the 80 years in her just hit me. I just want to cry. And by cry I mean bawl like a baby. She has become much more to me that just my MIL. I spend everyday with her. How will I deal with this the day she is no longer here. Is it wrong of me to pray to God to let me have many more years with her. Some times she is that feisty lady lol and some times she is that small child in a woman’s body. She is fragile and frail but she is that woman of God that I admire. I love her. God i know you hear my prayers. Please bless us with many more years with her. How do people do this????

So for the first time in 5 years since I have known my MIL she grabbed my arm and acted like she was about to hit me with this look on her face. Then 2 mins later like it didn’t even happen. Yes I know it’s not her fault. It’s this awful disease. But while she don’t remember I do. How do I get over this? I’m a lil freaked out. Am I over reacting. It’s not cause if bladder infection or anything My sis and sweet mom...樂 More patio time with my sweet mom....one of her favorite things to do. ❤樂

Another day of enjoying the patio. Savoring every beautiful moment possible with my precious mom. 樂 My sweet mom enjoying the patio. #enjoythelittlemoments I am writing this post, hoping that with the global connections of this group’s members, I might find similar stories to ours. My mother, who has Alzheimer’s, also has a seizure disorder. She had three grand mal seizures (over 20 years ago), each one a year apart, and each one in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. She had no further seizures for 17 years. A few years into her ALZ diagnosis, she had another one, after which she experienced marked clarity. It was as if the seizure hit a “reboot” button; she was able to put more words together, follow more conversation, understand more humor, walk better, attempt more activities independently (hair/teeth brushing), swallow better, and eat more. This phenomenon has continued for 4-5 years. Granted, we see deterioration over time like all families. But the seizures continue to reset her baseline and have given us more time, and probably better quality of time, than we had anticipated. Please, I do not want to debate the merits of seizure medications or listen to negative feedback about why my mother should be on them. This is an intentional, carefully-considered approach decided upon by our family, and her physicians quietly marvel at what continues to happen. I would love to hear if anyone else has experienced this with their loved ones. We would like to elevate the conversation to see if this warrants research, because there really isn’t much. Currently, one paper, written by Ira Hyman, Ph.D., has explored this phenomenon, and he has received feedback from a handful of The last time my mom held a pen in her hand...♥樂 I have dreaded this post for years. Currently in the hospital with my beloved mom, and things don’t look good. I am drowning in grief. 

I apologize for asking so many questions, but I don't have time right now to research them myself. Is it normal for a Vascular Dementia person to dress inappropriately for the weather? My mom is wearing a sweater today, and it's hot (80+) and humid out (I'm in shorts and a no-sleeve shirt). She saw her geriatric specialist, and he says she has improved her test score by 1 point. He's now undecided whether she has Mild Cognitive Impairment or Vascular Dementia. My first question is, does it make a difference? My second question is, does that mean she is Stage 1? How do you determine what stage a person is in? Thanks! Has anyone's loved one experienced the feeling of slipping out of a chair, out of bed, or when they're standing, but they really aren't?

What should I tell my mother when she asks why she can't remember where the dishes go in the kitchen?

I have a question. Is it better to point out to my mother that we already discussed something? For example, we are going to an Open House today. We are leaving at 4 after I give our dog her medicine. Then we are picking up my computer on the way to the Open House. We have gone over this at least 5 times today. Should I keep reminding her that she's forgetting or just pretend we never talked about it?

How I wish I could say "I'm through" and actually be "through". It isn't even my mom, who has dementia. It's everything else. Our furnace needs to be replaced, but they can't say for sure that it will eliminate the white dust that is all through the house. Of course we can't afford a new furnace (still paying off this one that we bought 3 years ago). My health sucks, and as my mom's sole caregiver, I have to figure out what's going on (doctors are not helping). My dog has a stone in her stomach (like she ATE a stone) and we are extremely worried about her (she also has epilepsy). I can't get the house clean and uncluttered let alone figure out where the white dust is coming from. I am so tired! Not that it would make a difference, but I haven't even had the energy to update my useless siblings on everything going on. The good news is that my mom is doing fairly well and is helping out more since I've been sick. My counselor asked me something yesterday that I didn't know the answer to. Has my mother, who has dementia, been assessed for Level of Care? I don't even know who would do that. The reason for her question was, if I keeled over tomorrow, what would my siblings do. I told her they would put her in a nursing home. That's when she said that it might not be an option if she didn't qualify for that level of care. So how do i find out what level of care she's at? My mother has dementia and gets easily fixated on things. We have a LOT of clutter in our house. I am trying to clear it, but I have to try to catch up and keep up with the finances, medical stuff, etc. I am on disability and have very limited energy, so how do I do both: clear the clutter and handle the paperwork? It is, as you know, difficult to hear the same thing over and over and over again, yet I really need to get a really good picture of our financial status. So do I concentrate on what she can see and fixate on, or do I work on the paperwork? My mother has TONS of dirty laundry every weekend. I make sure I've done all it the weekend before, but she still manages to astonish me with the amount of laundry. I know she doesn't wear all of it, but I don't know what's dirty and what isn't. Any suggestions? Thanks! My mom has Vascular Dementia (don't know what stage). Other than memory and confusion issues she does pretty well. She says she wants to do more around the house. So she unloads the dishwasher, folds laundry, etc. The problem is that when she unloads the dishwasher, she puts the clean dishes in strange places. When she folds laundry, she mismatches the sox. I have a daily checklist for her so she can check off when she takes her medicine, eats, unloads the dishwasher, folds blankets, etc. I have a sign so she knows whether the dishes in the dishwasher are clean or dirty. I've given her all the tools I can think of so she can remain as independent as possible. I don't know what else to do. She is so concerned about me being overwhelmed (which, of course, I am) that she keeps wanting to help. Her "help" though, makes more work for me.

I am looking for a backup plan in case I am unable to care for my mom who has vascular dementia. My brother and sister are no help. Does anyone have anything written down that you could send me? My goal is to have a document that I can send to whoever is involved in caring for my mom if I can't. Thanks!

I live with and am caring for my 82-year-old mother who has vascular dementia. I have an older brother and sister who live out-of-state. I have all powers of attorney and am executor and beneficiary of her will. She has set up a trust for me of which I am the trustee ahead of my brother and sister. I have asked for their support and assistance in setting up a backup care plan in case I am unable to care for my mother, either temporarily or permanently. Their response has been to dig into her finances and criticize how I'm managing them. I got them to take a break over the summer but now they're starting after me again. I know legally I do not HAVE to share the POAs and will with them. What about morally?

Today we had to hospitalize our dog, Cuddles, because she's had 8 seizures since Tuesday morning and nothing we tried stopped them. She's okay and we're going to bring her home in a little while. My mother, who has vascular dementia, couldn't stop crying because she missed Cuddles so much. This seems to be an exaggerated response to me. Does it to you?

My mother has vascular dementia and is 81 (82 on March 15th). She says she is afraid to go to sleep in case she doesn't wake up. I know she sleeps some because when I'm up in the night, I can hear her snoring. But today, she says she didn't sleep during her nap because she was so afraid she wouldn't wake up. I don't know what to do or say. I've been reading people's posts about sundowning. What is it? I haven't had time to research it, so I apologize if the question has already been answered. Does anyone know of a way to prevent UTIs? I suspect my mom is getting them more than she tells me. I read somewhere that there is a medication that prevents them, but I couldn't find the name of it? Thanks!

My counselor told me the other day that I am in crisis and that I need to start taking care of myself. So what do I do to take care of myself?

I want to share some information I discovered a while back. My mom's geriatric specialist prescribed Memantine to help with her cognitive function. In researching drug interactions with her other medications, I discovered that her antihistamine (cetirizine) actually DECREASES the acetylcholine in her brain. Decreased acetylcholine is what contributes to dementia. So I ordered a homeopathic antihistamine (ClearLife) and took her off the cetirizine. I don't know if it's made a difference because she seems to be declining anyway, but at least she isn't having any side effects. BTW, I am NOT giving her Memantine because it can cause GI bleeding and anemia, and we've already been down that road with donezepil. Ten Small Ways to Get Big Stress Relief (taken from my insurance newsletter): Breathe deeply. - Exercise - Get enough sleep Go for a walk - Write in a journal - Call a good friend - Pare down your to-do-list - Take a long bath - Listen to music Play with a pet.

So I understand what these are, but how do I fit all this into my schedule? The especially difficult one is #7; how do I pare down my to-do list? If I don't do stuff, no one else will.

My mother has Vascular Dementia. She functions fairly well except her memory is really bad. She wants to watch the news, but when she does, she doesn't understand it and/or gets upset with what's going on and talks about it about 50 times afterwards. Not to start a political discussion, but I don't want to hear about all the things the president is or isn't doing for hours on end. Is it wrong of me not to let her watch it?

Does anyone have a schedule for their loved ones for things to keep them active and busy? My mom can't help with the housecleaning because she has bad arthritis. So while I do the housecleaning, she gets frustrated and bored. I suggest she play on her tablet, work on the jigsaw puzzle, do word searches, or read, but I need other ideas. She isn't much for daytime television.

I sent my brother and sister an email yesterday that basically said out mom is probably stage 5 or 6, here are some things they can do to help her and me, etc. Their response is shocking. They are in complete denial! Her difficulties are due to normal aging. It sounds like I'm doing just fine. Blah blah blah! No wonder they aren't supportive! They don't think there's anything to be supportive of! A couple of days ago, someone posted a letter that they wanted to send to their siblings. I wish I had the guts to tell my siblings how I feel. Right now I am very resentful that they are able to live their "too-busy-for- mom" lives while my entire life is her. I love my mother dearly and do not resent helping her at all. What I resent is that I do not have the freedom to go out with friends, go on a vacation, work outside the home, or just sit on my patio and enjoy the last days of summer. I resent that I have to fight tooth and nail for help from agencies and still don't have enough help. I resent that my siblings, who I love very much, do not seem to care about me at all. My sister has enough time to meet us at Cooperstown (maybe) but not enough to come for a weekend and just hang out with her mother. I resent that I cannot watch an entire television show without having to explain a gazillion times what's going on. I resent that we cannot go to plays or movies anymore because my mom can't follow the plot. I resent that while my siblings are living their dreams, I have to table my dreams of having children. I resent that my health is suffering because I don't have time or energy to take care of myself. The worst part is that my mother is still fairly functional. I know How do you handle siblings who don't call our mother, and when you mention it to them, they say "the phone lines go both ways."? My mother was diagnosed with Vascular Dementia in November. The doctor didn't specify what stage, but from my observations I would say she is in the beginning stage. I have an older brother and an older sister, neither of whom live nearby. I have lived with my mother for 20+ years and have become her caregiver in the past 2-3 years as she has declined physically and more recently, cognitively. In early February I was unable to get out of bed for 4 days with the flu. I emailed my siblings and expressed my concern that we didn't have a backup plan in case I cannot take care of my mom. When I was sick, she didn't take her medicine because I wasn't able to count it out or remind her to take it. Long story short, my sister called and said she would come in a couple of weeks to help develop a plan. The next thing I knew, my siblings wanted to see how our finances were. I'll be honest ... I was too sick to refuse their request. So I sent them what they asked for. Next thing I know, they're emailing and calling me with questions about what I sent them. After I had the flu, I came down with my third and worst case of bronchitis I had this year. When my sister came, all she focused on was the finances. When my brother called, it was about finances. I kept

I am new to this group, so please bear with me if this has already been asked and answered. My mother has mild/moderate dementia, and I am her caregiver. Recently I was down for 4 days with the flu. My mother didn't take any of her medicine and I had to cancel a doctor's appointment because I was too sick to drive her. We have no family nearby. Do you know of any kind of an outline to set up a backup plan in case I can't take care of my mom, both temporarily and permanently? Thanks! Yesterday I found out my dad is in the hospital with congestive heart failure. He went in Wednesday night but my step-mom didn't tell me until yesterday. I went to see him, and when I got home my sister was on the phone with my mom. She yelled at me for leaving Mom alone and told me I can't drive my step-mom to Cleveland Clinic because I can't leave mom. My sister lives in upstate New York and my brother is in North

My mother has vascular dementia. Every two weeks we go with our neighbor to get chiropractic and acupuncture treatment. We have been seeing the chiropractor for over 20 years and his daughter the acupuncturist for over 5. This past week we went. While the chiropractor was seeing me, his daughter came in and asked if he had seen my mom. He said he had, and his daughter said that my mom didn't remember. When we left, she said she hadn't seen the chiropractor. I checked with the receptionist who said that she did see him. Since then, she has been going on and on about how she didn't see the chiropractor. Now she says she isn't ever going back. She says if I don't believe her then nobody will. I suggested she ask them to sign a paper saying that they each saw her, but she says they'll sign it even if they don't see her. She is so upset about this. I do not know how to deal with this. It is important that she continue these treatments. How do I get her to continue and not be so upset? I am losing it! My mom has a mammogram this morning and she's crying and ranting about it like it's the end of the world. Mind you, she really isn't that advanced. We've had a tough month with appointments, sometimes 2 or 3 a day, but this is the last one for awhile. I know it's been overwhelming. It's been overwhelming to me too. I had to have a stress test this week because I was so afraid the stress was hurting my body. Thankfully it isn't. I'm trying to distract her now with asking her what her blessings are, but she keeps wanting to cry about her mammogram. I am usually very patient and compassionate with her, but today it's too much. The month is over, and next month is better. But she just can't let go of the past month.

I am at my wit's end. My mother has Vascular Dementia. She has to have 3 teeth pulled. She is so upset. She keeps saying "they're going to pull all my teeth" "I'm so scared of dying" "I won't be able to eat anything". I keep trying to stay calm when I talk to her but I'm losing my mind. I can't get her to focus on something else. She keeps saying "I don't understand. I could die tomorrow. Why do I need teeth pulled?" This has been going on for the last week and her appointment for a consultation isn't until the end of February. I just don't know how to deal with this.

This past week, my mother, who has vascular dementia, forgot how to shower, how to put dishes away, how to prepare and eat her yogurt, and how to get ready for bed. She has the symptoms of a UTI but her urine test came back negative. The doctor is treating her for a UTI with an antibiotic and is sending the sample to be cultured, but she doesn't think it will come back positive. My question is this: could the things I listed above be because of a UTI even though the urine test was negative, or should I contact her geriatric specialist and tell him I think she's having a rapid decline?

My 82-year-old mother has vascular dementia. I am her sole caregiver. I also have health challenges that require me to take a nap in the afternoon. Mom usually takes a nap also. I have noticed in the past week or so that she is very emotional (sobbing) for maybe a half hour after we wake up. She says she is very disoriented and confused and doesn't understand anything that's happening. I really can't go without a nap, but I am concerned about her being awake when I'm not ... not because she wanders or anything, but because she gets very upset when she's alone. There is no one who can be with her while I nap (I have very little support). I'm not sure she would give up her nap even if I could give up mine.

MyWhen mother your lovedhas always one lost felt the cold power more tothan speak, others, was but it gradual it seems or to overnight? be worse this winter. I've turned the heat up 2 degrees most of the season (I turn it down when I can), but she says she's still cold. I don't know what to do to get her warm. I dress her in layers, provide plenty of blankets, close the front blinds to keep the cold out, have the bottom of doors and windows blocked to keep the cold out ... I don't know what else to do. Is this normal for vascular dementia patients? Have your loved ones been concerned about things falling off of tables, counters, dressers, etc.? My mother says "the puzzle tray is going to fall off the table" and it's hanging off maybe an inch. Or she's in my bedroom and shoving everything back on the dresser because it's "going to fall" and it isn't even hanging over? Thanks! My mother has vascular dementia. This morning, I mentioned that we were meeting her best friend for lunch this Thursday. She kept repeating her friend's name. When I asked her why she was repeating her friend's name, she said it was because she couldn't "picture her." I was trying to think of a way to help her, and the only thing I came up with was to print pictures of family and friends. What I can't figure out is what to do from there. Should I have a notebook where she can look up whoever it is we're talking about? Should I find a wall where I post the pictures and names? Any other ideas? Thanks!

Caregiving is learning that not every exclamation of pain or discomfort requires a response from me. Caregiving is trying to schedule things so that neither my mother with dementia or my dog with epilepsy have a problem. Caregiving is waking up in the morning after a short night's rest, thinking of the million and one things that need to be done that day and realizing that I will only get 2-3 things done, IF it's a good day. It is realizing that even if I have plans for what I'm going to do in a day, as soon as my feet hit the floor, those plans will go up in smoke. It is wondering if a decline is due to a UTI or is more permanent. It is treasuring even good moment, wishing for more good moments, and praying that when the hard moments come they won't last, even if it means giving up my mother ... and feeling guilty for being so selfish when I think about what my life will be like after she's gone and all the stuff I can do and the clutter I can get rid of. It is being grateful that God forgives me my selfishness and understands my frustration. I think people that aren't caregivers don't understand how it is a 24/7 challenge. It goes beyond actual personal care, such as bathing, dressing, etc. It is following behind to make sure they close the door to the freezer or to the house. It's cleaning up the tub when they don't close the shampoo bottle before laying it on its side. It is not only answering the same question over and over again; it's answering it so they don't realize it's the gazillionth time you've answered it. It's laying awake at night trying to hear them breathing, then wondering if you should get up and check on them because you hear them moving around. It's questioning constantly how much to do let them do to maintain their independence without it becoming a safety issue. It is doing everything you can to keep them safe, healthy, and happy, and knowing that it will never be enough because you're only human and are up against a disease that is evil and relentless. It is constantly reminding yourself that the most important thing is that you love your loved one, and a sparkling clean house, totally organized life is way down the priority list. It is sacrificing planning for the unknown future to live fully in the present with your loved one, no matter how hard the current moment is. I believe it is the hardest job in the entire universe, but if you do "right" it can be the most rewarding.

I am fairly new to this group and have tons of questions, but I don't want to overwhelm you. I guess my biggest question is about time management. How do you do it? I have a huge to-do list that I'm lucky if I get 1 thing done each day. Phone calls, tax stuff, cleaning, financial, etc. ... it's overwhelming. Add to taking care of my mom, we have an epileptic dog who is not stabilized. So I am taking care of two loved ones, both with progressive, incurable, unpredictable diseases. My brother and sister live out of town, and there are only a few people I can call on in an emergency, let alone for daily stuff. I'm so tired! BTW, I am on disability because of fibromyalgia and arthritis pain, so my energy is already depleted. So how do you do it all? I am posting this in 2 support groups, so I apologize in advance for any duplication. I live with my mother who has vascular dementia. She has memory problems, but does not seem to be as advanced as some people I read about in this group. I am almost finished decorating our condo for Christmas. It's my gift to her every year, and she loves it. However, we also have a lot of clutter which I am trying to find a place for or get rid of. As I was decorating, I came across a few things that I could part with, so I asked her how she felt. She said it was fine, so I put them in a bag to give to our church garage sale. I thought all was fine. When I awoke from my nap, she was crying. She said she can't stand the clutter, that she can't see all the decorations because there's so much stuff, and she's worried about not waking up in the morning or after her nap so she can't be making decisions about to keep or get rid of. Then she said she feels like when we get rid of something we're getting rid of her memories. So how do I get rid of the clutter without getting rid of her memories?

How do you stop them from gaging when they drink coughing syrup? When is the best time to place them in memory care ?

I would like to hear from people with early onset Alzheimer's. I misplace nearly everything. My glasses, my phone, and believe it or not even my dentures. Last week an Uber driver took me to the shops. I left the vehicle and started with my shopping. All of the sudden I had a guy following me around with a phone. I was thinking he wanted to sell it to me and I told him to get lost. He stopped me and told me I must listen to him. It turned out to be the driver that wanted to give me my phone back that I left in his car. I don't drive myself as I get panic attacks. At times my memory is great and at times it suck. The question is do I have reason to worry...... ? Hi all, in what stage do they start to sleep more ? How can you help your LO to gain weight ? What can you use that help with knight terror ? How long do the final stage take? My mother has a terrible skin rush. It burns and itches. The pharmacy sent cream and tablets, but it doesn't work. What can one do

Hi all, are any of you using Lion's Mane Mushroom for your LO's and is it helping ? Hi all, do Risperidone help for hallucinations ?

Hi all, I have read that Lecithin is good to treat the symptoms of Alzheimer's. Do you know about this ? Hi, did any of you used stem cell treatments to help your LO and did it help ? Do your LO get hot flashes and what do you use to manage it ?

Hi all that use medical cannabis for their LO. Did the use of medical cannabis improved their speech? Hi all Any of your LO's on 20mg Aricept and 20mg Memantine per day and in what stage are they ? Hi all Are any of your LO's take Memantine 28g MR once per day?

Any people from South Africa using CBD for their LO's ? Do it help them and who is your supplier? Hi all, what can one use or do to prevent your LO's from getting UTI? From tomorrow I'm giving my mother 5 drops medical cannabis oil 3 times a day. She treat the caregiver like trash and if I try to stop it she explodes. I was giving 4 drops twice per day, but it's not working...... Hello all. I want to hear if anybody ever used MCT oil for their loved ones and did it help? The same with virgin coconut oil, did it make any differences? In what stage do they start making up stories. You know it can't be, but they believe it. What does stage 5 look like ? Hi all In which stage do they start to mix up different stories. Or start with the one, then jump to the next one and then the next one without finishing one story ? Hi all, in what stage do they start to forget the names of items they use daily ? In what phase do the agitation and outbursts start?

Is there anything one can do to slow the progress of the disease? In what stage do they start to forget the names of items, eg. the name of a hospital, what you call a clipboard and the name of a extended family member..... It's like the more they stress the faster the disease progress, or am I wrong...... Hi all, can stress make your LO move vaster through the phases? Hello, any idea in which stage do they lost their ability to smell things?

Hello all, I need your opinion please. My mother started falling a few years a go without any explanation. Her memory was fine and she was hospitalised last year with severe dehydration. When I went to visit her the next day I was shocked. I didn't know this person, she was aggressive and acted all funny. The doctor did a MRI on her that was "normal". I was informed by the doctor that she have severe Alzheimer's as she only scored 9 out of 30. They then cave her some tables and sent her home. If I see how this started I'm not sure if it is Alzheimer's. What other kind of dementia start with falls and sudden memory lost? Getting her haircut today 樂 Ok...something's gotta change. Her eating schedule is all screwed up. Its almost 10pm and she wants to eat again. I gotta work on this.

Another good day with mom. Mani and lunch at my work. The whole time at lunch though...you work here? How long you work here? 12 yrs mom. Wow, that's a long time. This question was asked SEVERAL TIMES throughout lunch樂樂樂樂 all good though, like some of you have said, appreciate the times that she can still talk, ask questions as opposed to no talking...樂樂樂樂 And here we go..."what day is it?" Yes...a few times in about 5 min樂 Question of the day..."Is this the world series already?" She's asked me 8 times within 30 min.樂 Another "random question" from her. "Are we paying the bills?" 樂

Question of the day...What day is it? I should actually say, question of everyday. All good, I'm used to it樂 Moms latest thing, "You work tomorrow? Why you up so late? You better go to bed." My reply, "Ok ma but I go to bed when I want." She replies, oh, ok...good night. 樂樂樂Gotta love her. 樂樂 "What's today?" "What month is it?" Yes...several times daily! Taking care of mom today. ;-) HappyMa and Saturday I hangin' all! out. Another busy day at home. Ma and I slept in. I made some omelettes for bfast. Washing all her bedding and clothes, gotta vacuum and dust the whole house, go grocery shopping, try to water all her plants outside (she has close to 50+ plants) and later, make dinner. Yes, um still a little sick too. :-( Ok, I'm done whining... Have a great day all! Just to add...she has bronchitis right now too. Dr put her on Good day with ma today. Manicure, stopped in to see my gav coworkers and Japanese food for lunch. :-)

Took my ma for a haircut and a drive up the coast to my boyfriend's house to get out of the house. She's playing Boo's fathers piano. My coworker at my work and lunch at Olive Garden with mom. Great day with ma today! Bfast and took her for her haircut and she cruised with me all day doing light errands! Yes...she's finally going to sleep! She's been eating all night. Moms 85th bday. Fun day today  HaHappy Easter to you all! Enjoy your day! ppy Easter to you all! Enjoy your day!

Just a "mini vent" here. Lots of you are claiming that certain duets, herbs, etc...will reverse Alzheimer's. That's equal to saying there's a cure and that's not true! The only thing out there are prescriptions that will slow down progress in this crappy disease. Yes, other items like CBD oils help relieve agitation, aggression etc.. but there is nothing proving reversal or a cure. If that was the case, the number of people with this disease would be a smaller amount. This group is for support, suggestions venting about this disease, not false hopes of cures. Just my thoughts. Hope all is well with everyone here, have a good weekend. It really sucks when you're the sole caregiver for mom but you're sick. Here we go again folks, another person claiming to know someone that can "cure" Alzheimer's/Dementia. :- ( Already reported. Just want to say "Hey, Alzheimer's and Dementia are NOT CONTAGIOUS!" It's unfortunate that some people think this and they won't come and visit.:-( I wish people would stop posting about "A Cure for Alzheimer's!" We all know...there's no such thing! Thank you. Funny how someone posts something negative and then they turn off the notifications for their posts...This is an awesome support group people, not a let's "bash" group...just sayin'. :-)

Good morning to all. Just an apology to all that read the drama. Hope you all have a fabulous day today!

Just wanted to say...I come here, to this group for support, suggestions, venting. Not to be "TOLD" I have choices as my mom's caregiver to to leave, that I don't understand how the person with Alz feels. I'm a little insulted but I will tell that person...whatever! I love this group and all you have to offer! Just wanted to say, this group has helped me cope with this disease and that mom has. I'm not admin or a moderator, just a member of the his group. I've seen a few trolls in this group lately and I'll tell ya, I have NO PROBLEM "calling ng them out!" Have a good rest of the weekend all!

I'm a new member. I've been reading a lot of members posts and wow, this group makes me feel good about things. I know I'm NOT THE ONLY ONE dealing with this but knowing that I can interact with others, as opposed to just reading articles on the issues, is very helpful and totally comforting! I look forward to all this group as to share and offer to help each other stay positive and strong through our journey with our loved ones. BTW, my mom has Alzheimer's and I'm her main caregiver. My sis makes bfast for her 5 days of the week and takes her to appts. She lives about 10 min from mom and I and she works f/t. I live with mom, make bfast twice a week, lunch,dinner and snacks, 7 days a week. I do our laundry, clean house and take care of all her meds AND work p/t. Thank you for adding me!!! Just cut my "fill pill boxes" time in half. Just turn on some cool tunes and fill away樂樂樂 Pretty good day so far with ma. We've been watching Animal Planet "The Zoo" all day. She loves the animals. Here you go...long awaited selfie of ma and i This past weekend. My mom (Alzheimer's) and her sis, mom and her nephew and my aunt with her son's and grand daughter at dinner. Sis brought ma some flowers. :-) Thanks to my best friend and nephew, I got a night away.

All is good with both doctors! 樂 She gained about 10 lbs since her last visit with both doctors in July. 樂

We are home now. Thank you all for good thoughts and prayers. Potassium levels was very low.

Back in the ER for moms headaches...樂 Came home from a friends memorial, waled up to my front door to see mom sitting on the ground, almost tennis ball size bump on her head. She said she heard something outside and went to look and she tripped. Well, yah, I freaked out! Called paramedics, sat in the ER till almost 11pm last night. They admitted her for observation. Private room and they gave me a cot to stay with her. I love this hospital! Very caring here. She/we will go home today. :-)

Not too much of a difference with her. First pic, Dec2015. Her skin and make up were nice, she's a little thinner though. No Alzheimer's yet. Second pic from May 2019. She gained some weigh, no make up and skin is dry... She was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in late 2017-early 2018. I'm so exhausted right now, can't even think straight. One doctor appointment with Mom is enough, two in one day is too much. Mom is napping. Me, gotta get dinner started and stuff ready for work tomorrow...樂樂樂樂樂樂

Yes...it's "pill fill-up"day. Something most of us can relate to this, right? No one is alone in this journey...樂 Does anyone else here feel like they are on a hamster wheel as a loved ones caregiver? So mom was doing her usual scratching/picking at her eyebrows all day. She doesn't have any eyebrows, hasn't for years. She draws them on with an eyebrow pencil. This has been going on since I was a kid. Just a And here we go again ... Non stop picking and scratching 樂樂 Nothin' like a little defiance to start the day and week...SMH... Just when you think you're two steps ahead of your plan, something throws you three steps back. I hate when that happens... OMG....READY TO PULL MY HAIR OUT! I'll leave it at that.

Ok my friends...I don't post much, I usually just reply to stuff I see but I got to vent here. I took care of my best friends mom shortly before she passed of stomach cancer. This woman was like my second mom so without hesitation, I jumped in when my friend needed me. My best friend and I have know each other since first grade, about 6 yrs old. We are now both 57 yrs old. Long story short, my friend is taking me and her cousins to a nice dinner in appreciation and she WANTS my mom to go. My mom has Alzheimer's for about 1 1/2 years now. I asked ma to go with us 4 days ago. She said yes and was excited. I reminded her each day and she forgot about it everyday. Well, today is the day and she flat out says NO, I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE. I f'king HATE THIS DISEASE!!! I MISS MY MOM!!! So frustrating! Sorry for the rant, thank you for listening. I'm about ready to pull my hair out...UGGGG! Everytime my LO refuses to shower or tell me she already showered when I know it’s not true I tell her, “YES mom, I know you already showered but your doctor has prescribed a special soap just for you to shower. This is a very good soap tharelieve any pain or avoid any rash on your body and I want you to use it every day so I can continue taking you to church on Sunday’s. I want you to feel good because you’re my mom and I love you very much” Then she becomes calm and tells me “okay I will shower again”. Everyday I have to repeat this story but it has been working for months now. 樂樂樂. My advice is never argue or force them, just find a way they will do it. Sometimes little lies are good when it’s for their wellbeing and your peace of mind 樂 Yesterday my mom lost her balance and fell for the first time. Im so glad I was around to help her get up the floor because she couldn’t do it on her own. We have noticed that she’s losing balance for the past few months. She’s still does a lot of things on her own such as eat, shower, change her clothes and underwear (pull ups), do dishes, make coffee, sew. She still can carry a normal conversation but her short term memory is very bad. Could this fall be a side effect of dinezepil and memantine or progression of the disease? Im worried 樂

My mom is driving me crazy complaining about everything. She has been complaining about stomach pain but won’t stop eating. Lord have mercy 樂樂樂

What’s the point of telling your LO they have Alzheimer’s? Will this have a positive impact on them or the desease?? NO!! It’s already cruel for the family and caregivers, so why make it more cruel for them?. My 75 yr old mom was diagnosed almost 5 years ago and although her short term memory is very bad, she’s still somewhat independent. Her 5 children have never told her she has Alzheimer’s. We focus on giving her love and understanding, we try not to argue with her. We try to understand her world instead of making her understand the real world. Last week, I rearranged her bedroom thinking she would like it, but no, she’s very unhappy having her bed in another position; Well this weekend will put it back the way it was because that’s how she likes it and if she’s happy things are easier to manage. Sometimes little things can make a difference and the key is to make this tough road less difficult for all of is us 樂

Hello, this is my situation now. My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s 4 years ago but already had symptoms for a year prior to diagnosis. She still knows anybody in the family but her short term memory is very bad. She has been complaining about belly pain for about 2 months, I took her to her PCP who referred her to see a gastroenterologist. The gastro ran all the necessary tests such as sonogram, CT sacan, endoscopy and the result came out normal, nothing seems to be wrong, no bacteria, biopsy was negative. The MD says everything looks normal (she does not remember she went to the doctor) Lately I’ve been noticing that she complains most of the time when I’m around. When Im at work and she’s with her home aide 9 hours per day she hardly complains, but as soon as I get home from work she starts complaining about belly pain and ask me to take her to the doctor and not to let her die. She eats very well and does not have any other health issues besides Alzheimer’s. Could this be mental? My mom is a cat lover. She used to have cats back in our country. After her Alzheimer’s diagnosis we decided to bring her back to New York so she can be around her 5 children. Today she told me she would love to have a cat to entertain herself. I love cats as well but never liked the idea of having one due to it’s extra work, but anything that makes her happy I will do for her. I hope she does not over feed or forget to feed him. I need to keep an eye on it 樂 Tomorrow I’m traveling with my mom to visit my dad for 10 days. We’re traveling from New York to our country The Dominican Republic (a hot humid island in the Caribbean). Mom wants to pack like we’re going to Alaska ☹樂 At what time does your LO goes to bed? My Mom goes to bed around 8pm and get up around 9am the next day. Any LO with bad knee pain due to arthritis? If so, what do you do to relieve their pain?

Is there any happy pills you can recommend? My 74 yr old mom with alz has become very combative and negative. Im trying to change her diet to a more healthy one because she was recently diagnosed with diabetes Im trying to have her eat more vegetables, whole grains, water. 2% lactaid milk etc. She’s complaining, and saying I’m giving her bad quality food. All she wants to eat is carbs like white bread, white rice, plantains and all starchy food she’s not supposed to eat. She has become very aggressive towards my dad to the point that I had to bring her to live with me in New York. All she wants is to make his life miserable, cuss him out, wish him death in a car accident and accuses him of cheating. They have been married for over 50 yrs and my dad has been a great man and wonderful devoted father, he always put his family first ( he’s 78 she’s 74). I feel his life is in danger when she’s around him but she wants to go back to him and it worries me that she would hurt him or even stab him when he’s asleep. Is there pills that can make her mood more happy and less aggressive and negative? She’s currently on Donezepil, Mamantine and Xanax. y LO’s primary doctor stopped Quetiapine because it makes Alzheimer’s patients decline faster and it increases the chances of heart attacks. Have anyone heard the same? Does CBD oil really work? how is it given to a person with Alzheimer’s. Also where can I get it? Mom said someone on TV farted because it smells really bad樂樂

My mom (My everything) will be 75 in 10 days (Oct 14th). She was diagnosed in 2015 at the age of 71 , but had symptoms for about a year prior to being diagnosed by a neurologist in the Dominican Republic ( We’re from DR). We noticed she was becoming forgetful and repetitive and we thought it was due to age. We took her to a neurologist and unfortunately she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Although she still has some independence, her short term memory is extremely bad and she cannot longer be alone, so she has been living with me in New York for the last 2 years. My dad who is almost 80 (they’ve been married 53 yrs) and my 4 siblings are 100% supportive, they’re always there to assist with anything. Despite this tough road, Im thankful for my supportive family樂 Hello all, Question: which doctor treats Alzheimer’s desease, Neurologist or Psychiatrist? My mom feels her feet are burning (she’s not diabetic). She thinks it’s because the people downstairs are cooking and the floor gets hot 樂 Mom is constantly complaining about itchy scalp and skin and she scratches a lot. Is this normal in people with Alzheimer’s? Any advise? Just came home from work and found my mom almost unable to walk, she loses her balance. Her aide told me that my mom slept a lot today. Do you think this may be due to an UTI? She says she feels some pain when she urinates.

I just noticed my mom arm and hand shaking. Is this common in people with Alzheimer’s? Do people with alz stop recognizing their loved ones suddenly or is it a slow process? I work full time Monday-Friday. My weekends consist of running errands, doing laudry, food shopping, cleaning, cooking caring for mom and taking her to church. No time for myself to go do my hair or nail, no even to go to the mall. Im exausted physically and mentally most of the time but my mom thinks I go out to see a boyfriend 樂. She does not realize that ever since she got this illness the word “BOYFRIEND” does not exist in my world 樂樂樂

My mum is driving me crazy saying she wants to go back to her country. She was diagnosed about 4 yrs ago and although she still somewhat independent she cannot be alone. She acuses people of stealing money and medicine from her and she can get very aggressive if we try to contradict her. I don’t know what to tell her to keep her in New York with me and my siblings. Any suggestion?

My Moms heart cath went great. No blockages.Dr. Said she has a good heart. But...... She fell again this mid morning outside trying to walk her dog in the back yard and yelled for help for over an hour until my nephew found her. She said she had her walker with her , but I havnt had a chance to ask my nephew if that is true. Knowing my Mom , she didnt have her walker with her. So this is the 5 time in the past few weeks that she has fallen. Thank God she hasnt broken any bones or hit her head. My cousin that lives with her was asleep in the front bedroom. I told my Mom to never take the dog out again and when she wakes up in the mornings to call on the speaker to my cousin so she can get up also. If things dont change for the better I guess she may have to live with one of us daughters. Because Im not putting her in a nursing home. She can still do everything except cook, drive, and walk a short distance because she gets weak and falls. And she is forgetful.

What stage was your loved one in when they started falling?

My Mom has fell 4 times in the past few weeks and almost fell again yesterday. Thank God that she has not broken any bones. She and my cousin that lives with her said she did not hit her head when she fell. But she has been having headaches more often. My Mom gets very shaky and week. She uses a push sit walker to get around and will not use a wheelchair because she said it makes her dependant on others. Anyway Sh e seems to sleep a lot. She is having a ct scan soon and tomorrow she will be having a heart catherization. Her name is Mary. Please keep her in your prayers. Thank you

My Mom was in the hospital since last Thursday due to her legs and feet swelling. They did test and found some fluid around her lungs. Said she has conjestive heart failure. 樂 She went home yesterday evening. And this morning on the way from the bathroom she fell in the hallway and hit her head My Mom has been shaky a lot that I noticed a few days before she went into the hospital. My cousin that lives with her called for help to get her up. My Moms apt is made of concrete walls and floors with a tile type covering. My Mom said her head didnt hurt and she didnt need to go to the e.r. The home health nurse came to check on her. I told her to start using her walker. I stopped by today and saw she had been using it. If she doesnt keep using it , she will be in the wheelchair. I dont want her to fall again and break a bone or bust her head open. Thank you God for laying her down gently and her not getting hurt bad when she fell. I praise you! My Mom fell again yesterday. She didnt get hurt. Thank God. My heart is breaking because today she was more confused. She could remember what day of the week is is. And asked if Easter has always been on Sunday. This photo is of my Mom while I was on lunch break. Even though it was a quick lunch, I always cherish the memories with her. I love you, Momma

So sad that I can not confide in my Momma without her telling everyone else what we talked about. I have not visited her or called her since our argument due to an accusation. I've been told that she wants to see me. But if so why hasnt she called me herself? I'm very angry and hurt. I took my Mom shopping before Easter. She saw a dancing rabbit and said she loved it so much and that she wanted one. A couple days later I went back and got it for her. She asked what it was for when I gave it to her. I reminded her that she said she wanted it and loved it so much. When my sister went to visit she asked where she got it and my Mom told her my son gave it to her. My son was not with me when I took it to my Mom. The next night my cousin that lives with my Mom asked her where she got the rabbit and my Mom said my Sister gave it to her. About 10 minutes later she asked again and replied with the same answer. Again after 10 minutes she was asked again and finally said that I gave it to her. Sometimes it seems she has gotten worse and sometimes she seems fine. I let my Mom know that they are bringing a hospital bed for her on Monday. She said Im not going to need it long because I know God is going to heal me. What do I say to that???? I believe she will be healed when God takes her to Heaven. But not while she is still on earth. I pray for a cure to be found. UPDATE....She is finally asleep.

My Mom is still in CCU after having pacemaker put in. The same night she cried with pain from a bad headache, pain in both ears, face and down her neck and chest. She is dehydrated and her kidney function is down. She had sundowning tonight. It started about 7pm. She pulled the wires almost out of the tape finger oxygen thing so they had to put on another one. She kept messing with it and took that one off while I was getting ready for bed. I just now look over and she took it off again. She keeps messing with all the Took my Mom to KFC. She said all she wanted was slaw, but I bought her a $5 box leg and thigh. She ate it all except the biscuit. I gave her my other piece of chicken to take home with her. I knew she would eat most of it. I love her so much. I wish I could win the lottery so I could take her on a cruise. or go back to the Mountains and have Thanksgiving there in a cabin. This my Mom "Queen" Mary, on our weekly day out for lunch. She wanted some chicken nuggets, so I took her to Burger King. I love her very much. She makes me laugh. So happy to see her smile and having fun. Nov 12, 2018 I DO NOT OWN ANY MUSIC IN THIS VIDEO.

My Mom, son and cousin stayed at a resort in Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge TN for 9 days. My Mom really enjoyed it. She just couldn't get over how beautiful and big the mountains are. She seen it snowing in the mountains for the first time. Had a picnic by the river in Cades Cove. Fed the bears at the Three bears store in Pigeon Forge. Went to the TN/NC border on New Found Gap Hwy 441 to see the spectacular view of the mountains. Icicles were hanging off the side of the mountain. We also made footprints in the snow. We have lots of pictures. I really enjoyed this time with her. Being that I was with her 24/7 for 9 days, I could tell that her memory is not good. In April my 2 sisters and I will be taking my Mom to Florida to spend time with her and make memories. Since she loved the bears in TN so much, we are going to surprise her with a stop at the zoo so she can see the animals and get to feed the giraffes!!! Got some canvas and paint, took it to my Mom's today. She did a fingerpainting on one. We both did our right handprints on one and the 3rd one , me, my Mom and son will do hand print for 3 generations. I'm also going to get her to sign her name. And I'm waiting on a call back to get our hands molded. I also took her to eat at KFC.

I was wondering if anyone else's LO rather sleep in a recliner than go to sleep in their bed. We bought her a new mattress, and she said she slept good the night before, but my cousin who lives with her called me last night and said she wouldnt go to sleep in her bed. My Mom has seemed to be as little more confused lately. Real jittery and weak. She wont use a wheelchair and I'm afraid. Shes going to fall and hit her head on the concrete wall or floor. She uses a push sit Walker. Yesterday I noticed that my Moms DL expired on her birthday last year. Keep in mind she has not driven since her diagnosis. She said that she was going to go get them renewed. We let her keep them for photo id because she promised she wouldnt drive. And she hasnt not driven. She told me that she could drive better than me. I told her if she went to get them renewed that the Dr would contact the dmv and suspend her license. And she would have to get a regular id. She said it was my fault that they expired because I wouldnt let her drive. I told her she is not getting them renewed and that I will take her to get an id only. She is a mess. LOL Took my Mom to pick out and paint some pottery today. We both enjoyed painting and spending time together.

Last night at this time my Mom was sundowning. Her granddaughter brought her a stuffed frog to have when she does it again. She is watching her Atlanta Braves game and eating coconut cookies in her hospital bed. So far she has not sundowned tonight. If she does I hope the frog helps her. It was suggested by a member in this group. Is she not sundowning tonight because she is watching tv??? I'm confused because last night she was doing what I believed to be sundowning. She was diagnosed Jan 2018. It seems that my Mom sleeps all the time. I took her picture the other day and I had to get somethings out of my vehical. She was sitting on a stool beside an old red barn. I turned away from her for a minute and looked back and she had dozed off. We went to another location for photos and she did the same thing while I was getting something out of my vehical. I would say 75% of the time she is sleeping. My Mom gets confused sometime, but she still seems to know what is going on 70% of the time. I know I have to repeat myself to her. She had a son that passed away at 3 days old. She never got to hold or bond with him so she thinks that her grandsons do no wrong. When it comes to my son, the baby of the grandsons which is 21 years old, I get upset with her when she goes against my wishes , when it has something to do with him. Like the other day, I bought 3 burgers. My son and I ate ours. She said she didnt want one when I ordered ours but I got her one anyway. We ate ours and she tried to give hers to my son. I told her he had one and that was enough. Well she started eating hers and ate half of it and kept trying her best to give it to my son. Keep in mind my son is overweight. I told her I said he doesnt need it. You finish eating it or put it up and eat the rest for supper. She finally ate the rest of it. She loves all her grandchildren,

Today is my beautiful Moms 83rd birthday. She is able to do daily activities, except cook and drive. She doesnt clean house because shes not able. She has more bad days than good days with just feelng tired all the time . She wants to sleep all the time too. She still knows her family , but just gets confused sometimes at what she wants to say. As you can see in the photo she has had that sore on her lip for about 3 to 4 months now. She keeps picking at it. I tell her not to bother it, she tells me that shes trying to get it off. I tell her that it wont get well if she keeps picking at it. Does anyone elses family member pick at sores. She never did this before being diagnosed with Alzheimer's. She also says it wont be long before she sees Jesus. She says this because she knows her body is tired and giving out. I believe it wont be long. I believe that God will answer our prayers that he will take her before she gets to where she dont know her family and before she gets in the last stages. Me and my beautiful Mom celebrating her great granddaughters 3rd birthday today. I love her with all my heart and soul.

I took my Mom out for our weekly lunch. We went shopping afterwards. Today my Mom thought Easter was coming up. She spoke with a friend and after I got home, I asked my Mom who the lady was that stopped and talked to her. She didnt remember speaking to her. And while we were shopping I was walking behind her and I didnt hear this until I played back the video that she thought I walked off and left her. I was behind her. She has her good days and bad days of remembering. She is still able to do daily living. Except we dont allow her to drive or cook. Love my Mom. I enjoy this time with her. My Mom had a great birthday yesterday. I took her out to eat. My middle sister, Bro in law, nephew and cousin went also. She was surprised when the waitresses came and sang HaPpY BiRtHdAy to her. Then we went home and my oldest sister, her middle son, my husband and my son stopped by. Then we went shopping and she got some new make up. Friday or Saturday I'm going to take her to get a perm in her hair. Her family has a surprise for her this weekend! Can't wait!

Our family had our Easter on Saturday. After taking pictures, my 2 oldest nephews escorted my Mom to the passenger seat of her car. I told my oldest nephew I would be suprised if she didnt get down the road and make my cousin get out so she can drive. Found out today that after she left and got to stop sign she shut the car off and made my cousin switch places because she was going to drive herself home. After reading comments on my last post , I believe the best thing to do is set it up for her to take driving test. If that doesn't work then we will have the Dr write a paper to take to DMV to hae5 them taken. Gosh.... I feel like grieving for my Mom because she's going to have them taken away. Be a use I know how I would feel if I had mine taken I bought this coconut oil for my Mom to start taking to see if it will help her memory. Can anyone tell me how much and how many times a day does she need to take the coconut oil. I also got her vitamins. Is this the best kind of oil? What kind do you give your love one?

My Mom was admitted to the hospital yesterday. We thought it was side effects due to the new medication (RIVASTIGMINE TARTRATE 3MG) AND IT WOULD INCREASE TO 6MG AFTER A MONTH. she started taking the day before. She was vomiting, weakness and tremors. Around 1am that morning. And was so sick yesterday. When my Mom wants to go to the e.r. herself She feels something is wrong. Dr. said her symptoms are not from the new medication that her Dr gave her. The problem my Mom has , she was hospitalized last time and she sure didn't have tremors, weakness with it. Those are just a couple of side effects that the new medicine has. I am not giving her any more of it. The last one caused her more confusion and this one made her very sick. I believe part of her being sick is from side effects. How many caregivers don't give your relative medicine because of the side effects? And if you do, what is the name of it? When I googled side effects for this medicine after I found out it made her sick, it is prescribed for patients with Parkinson's disease. My Mom doesn't have that. I'm on the way to the hospital now. I'll get the name of the med that made her sick. Please keep her in your prayers. Very mu h appreciated. I was talking with a friend yesterday telling her about my Mom's illness and I got sick. I started feeling nauseated. Has this happened to anyone before? So thankful that my Mom was able to get out and enjoy our local Fair this year with family. She got her photo made with Mellow Mushroom. And enjoyed the funnel cake that I bought for her. She was chilling with her shades on and holding up peace sign. I love my Mom. Thank you everyone that prayed for her while she was in the hospital. My Mom's only living sibling, her baby brother passed away early morning hours on Sunday unexpectedly. My Mom was the oldest of 4. She had a sister and two brothers. Please keep her and our family in your prayers. Thank you

They discharged my Mom sometime yesterday. At 6pm they said the ride to the rehab would be there within 30 minutes to 3 hours. At 9:10pm I went and found a wheelchair. wrapped the hospital gown around her and tied it and put a sheet over her legs. Pulled up my vehical and took my Mom home! So my sister and I decided to let physical therapy go to my Moms home instead of her being in a strange place. Neither one of us felt comfortable knowing she would be there. She is where she needs to be. At home. She was so happy to see her furbabies and they were happy to see her. She is weak and has a cough. So please continue to pray for her. Thank you My Mom in 2011, 1973 and with me in 2018 I love her so much. And it breaks my heart that I am loosing the Mom that I use to know. My Mom was diagnosed in January 2018 with moderate Alzheimer's. I hate this disease. A couple of days ago she was visiting her grandddaughter and 60 minutes came on. It was telling about a husband taking care of his wife that has alzheimer's. Mom said "I hope I never get alzheimer's." My niece called and told me what she said. I gave her time to get back home and said, " Mom, so you were watching 60 minutes about the lady with alzheimer's. ?" She replied yes. " I said , "Mom you do have alzheimer's ." She replied "I do?" I said "Yes you do." She stopped driving about 4 months after her diagnoses. Yesterday she said she needs to go get her license renewed because her birthday is coming up. I told her that she cant renew them because she cant drive anymore. She didnt argue with me about it. The other day she was looking at a very old photo of her uncle. The corner part had gotten wet and stuck to another photo and that part was pulled off just the photo part. The photo was still whole. She said someone cut her photo. Instead of arguing with her about it, and I was taking her out to eat and shopping, I just Took my Mom to the new neurologist today to get a second opinion. He confirmed that she does have Alzheimer's. Today my Mom realized that she does have it and there is no cure. I gave her a hug, told her that my sisters and I love her and will take care of her and not to worry. That we will take it one day at a time. Please keep her in your prayers. Thank you.

Took my Mom for a check up today. Her regular Dr told her she needs to stop driving. She told him to get in his car and she will get in hers and he will see whos the better driver. Oh my goodness. She didnt want to hear that he didnt want her driving. She cut her eyes over at me. She said that I called the Dr before I got to his office and told him to stop her from driving. I told her that Drs just dont get on the phone to talk and his assistant even told her that he didnt talk to me on the phone. She didnt believe it. She is very upset with me. I told her it was for her safety and other drivers. And that we didnt want anything to happen to her or other drivers. She said I wasnt her daughter anymore. She wouldnt let me help her to the car. It upset me very much. How can my sisters and I take her driving priviledges away without her getting angry like that.? I have been taking her to town the past week and to appts {my cousin drove her today}. Just so she wouldnt drive. She doesnt want my cousin driving. I feel so sick to my stomach about this. UPDATE :It was confirmed today after all the testing, that our Beautiful Mom has Alzheimer's. It is all in God's plans. We are taking it one day at a time. Please continue to keep her in your prayers. And As her caregivers, keep me, my sister's Teresa and Debra and our cousin Pam in your prayers also. Thank you all so much.

Tomorrow we will be taking my Mom to see the Neurologist to get answers from her test results and confirmation if it is Alzheimer's for sure. Prayers appreciated. Thank you.

My Mom was diagnosed on Jan 29, 2018. The Neuro put her on medication. But it seems that her memory has gotten worse. She is having an MRI later today and an EEG on the 15th. Like another member posted, I am grieving my Mom while she is still living. I get nauseated even thinking about what is ahead for her and my sisters and I. I am very close to my Mom and when God takes her home, I know I will grieve myself to death. My Mom has always said she never wanted to get to where she didnt know her family. Family is the most important thing to her. My sisters and I have been discussing about who will be POA. Which a decision needs to be made soon. We will find out in about 6 weeks from the test what stage she is in.I believe that I will see if we can get an earlier appt so we dont have to wait 6 more weeks to find out the results. A couple of weeks ago I felt that she is in stage one, but since talking with my middle sister while I was out of town, I believe she is in stage 2. Only our immediate family and a few close friends know about our Mom. I am glad that we have this group so we have someone to talk to. Took our Beautiful 81 year old Mom to her primary care Dr. a couple weeks ago and by the verbal test, he said she has some dementia. Took her today to the neurologist and by the verbal testing he said she has UPDATE: We decided against the surgery.

My Mom has to have abdominal surgery sometime in the next 2 days. She is 81 years young. The heart Dr had a echocardiogram and EKG done on her. He listened to her heart. He said she sounds strong enough to have surgery, but will read test result in morning to make sure. She still has to see lung Dr to see why she gets short of breathe when walking a short distance and to make sure her lungs are good for surgery. Will also see the neurologist because of the side effects from the new medicine. With my Mom having Alzheimer's and will be put to sleep for the surgery, will it make her Alzheimer's any worse? Has anyone's family member had to be put to sleep and their condition change? Thank You. Well..... I'm taking my Mom out of town to see a new neurologist today, for a second opinion. We are praying that the Dr will say her memory loss is due to aging and not Alzheimer's. If we do get a 3rd diagnoses of Alzheimer's (first by her PD, second by 1st neurologist in our home town) then we will continue to take it day by day as we have done since her 1st diagnosis on Jan 29, 2018 and confirmed diagnosis by Neurologist Feb 22, 2018. If we get an Alzheimer's diagnosis, I believe we will take her to a different neurologist in a different city. Prayers please. Thank you.

We decided against Mom having surgery. We are also getting referred to a new neurologist in a big city for a second opinion. My sister and I was talking and recalled that our Mom seen a different neurologist 1 to 2 years ago. He did an MRI so he should have seen the beginning of alzheimers back then. So pray that the new neurologist will not see any signs of Alzheimers. And that she has been misdiagnosed. But if she does have it, that its Just beginning and not moderate. Thank you.

UPDATE on my Mom... Her kidneys are working 32% up from 20%. Heart Dr came in and said her heart has pauses in it. That the top part doesn't communicate with the bottom part. They will be putting in a pace maker in the next couple days. And they are giving her antibiotics for UTI. Continued prayers please.

It was confirmed today after all the testing, that our Beautiful Mom has Alzheimer's. It is all in God's plans. We are taking it one day at a time. Please continue to keep her in your prayers. And As her caregivers, keep me, my sister's Teresa and Debra and our cousin Pam in your prayers also. Thank you all so much.

P.S. Her Neurologist said she has moderate Alzheimer's. He wouldnt really say what stage she is in. So we are assuming 3 to 4 stage. He goes by mild, moderate and severe Alzheimer's. Has anyone else's family member been diagnoised with moderate Alzheimer's? What stage would you say she is in for moderate? WE feel that she is in beginning stages. Which for the neuro would be mild. He did change her medicine because what he had her on she said she was more confused. All I can say is I hate Alzheimer's! It's taking the Mom I have always known away.

I just want to scream! This Jan 29th it will be a year that my Mom was diagnosed with moderate Alzheimer's. Since Thanksgiving it seems that she has gotten a little worse to me. Maybe not to my other family. I have not seen or really been around my Mom since Thanksgiving and that is probally why I feel she seems to be getting worse. I believe that soon I will take my Mom back to the mountains or maybe to the beach. We both need this. Just me and her. I need this alone time with her before I loose her completely. My Mom told me today when I picked her up to go celebrate my birthday a day late, that she wasnt going to be here much longer. I said you are going to be here a long time. She said no I am not, I can't go on much longer. My Mom can still do everything except drive and cook a lone. Although her memory is fading. She was telling me today that her and her mom went to a family reunion last year. Then she said no my Mom passed away. My Mom also has a huge photo of my two sisters when they were little girls. My Mom was talking to my cousin saying something about the two little girls in the picture. That they are not her daughters. Then when I was on the phone with my cousin, She asked who are those girls in the photo. My Mom said my older sister and me. I said tell her no thats my two older sisters. It seems like she is getting more confused. God please heal my Mom and all those that suffer with this terrible disease. Amen. I love you , Momma. My Uncle passed away Sept 16. On my Moms birthday Sept 25, we were talking about my Uncle. She asked who he was. I said he was your brother. She said oh my brother that died. I said yesmam. I'm not sure if it's the Alzheimer's or if she didn't get closure because he was cremated and they are having his memorial service the end of October. My Mom is the oldest of four. All her siblings have passed away. Please pray for my Mom. Thank you I HATE ALZHEIMER'S. MY MOM FOUND OUT MY HUSBAND AND I WILL BE GOING ON A CRUISE. I TOOK HER TO GATLINBURG TN A FEW MONTHS AGO. SHE SAID BEFORE SHE WOULDN'T GET ON A SHIP. SHE JUST TOLD ME SHE RATHER GO ON OUR TRIP THAN THE RINKY DINK PLACES I TOOK HER. AT THE TIME SHE SAID SHE WAS HAVING A GREAT TIME. THAT REALLY HURT MY FEELINGS FOR HER TO SAY I TOOK HER TO RINKY DINK PLACES, WHICH I DID NOT.

My Mom is always complaining that she has a bad headache that starts at the back of her head. She has two cyst back there that are not cancerous. Thank God. The Doctor has done test . She takes over the counter med to try to get rid of it. Seems like she has a headache every day. My precious Mom has been saying off and on for the past month or so that she wont be here much longer. My Mom is still able to do everything. WE dont allow her to drive or cook. She is getting to where she is moving slower. And she wont use her push seat walker or wheelchair. She is very independent. She had a fever blister and keeps picking at it. She also had a sore where the dog scratched her and she kept picking at it. My Mom NEVER picked at any sores if she ever had any before Alzheimers. My Momma doesnt take any alzheimers medicine because one made her worse and the other put her in the hospital. If you know me, you know I love my Momma. I love her so much that I pray God will take her before she get to where she doesnt remember her children and grandchildren. She prays this also. I dont want to see my Mom be a shell . I dont want her to suffer. I dont want her to be scared. I love you with all my heart Momma.

As I sit here looking at photos of my Mom, I wonder will this be her true last Thanksgiving and Christmas? Next year will she remember and be able to enjoy these holidays with her family? Will it be our true last holiday for us (her family)? I feel that she has more bad days than good days. I am not ready to let this disease take over my beautiful Mom. I love her so much. I HATE THIS DISEASE! I WANT MY MOM BACK! Glad my husband is getting fed through feeding tube. Nurse said he isn't really eating at meal times. I'm concerned

My husband got out of the hospital and is back in nursing. He always is looking down and still isn't eating much because he likes to wander around. They are giving him nutrients through his feeding tube. I did get him to say I love you and miss you today. He did enjoy the Diet Coke I got him but then wanted to wonder around.

My husband is in Alheimers and dementia community. Today when I visited he knew my name, talked more, and said he wanted to leave. I know it's the dementia but it's the first time I heard this. Went to visit husband today in nursing home. First thing I saw was blood on his forehead and a cut. I knew he had fallen again. I said something to the nurse, he cleaned it up and said he didn't need stitches. Second time he did this in last few weeks I brought his dog in to see him and he just sat there with his blank stare. First Christmas apart from each other

As you know my husband has vascular dementia and is in ICU in the hospital. Dr told me today it's severe to advanced. He becomes delusional, combative, doesn't listen, and his blood pressure is still up. Today he took his feeding tube out and tried to take out his Foley of his catheter. Today he mumbled he had to catch a train. I asked him who I was and he said an old girlfriend's name. I have been staying there every day and night but took a break can last night and stayed at motel. I am wore out. UPDATE- I called to check on him and he had been up walking around and just laid down. They're keeping close eye on him

The nurse called me from nursing home. My husband was sitting on side of bed and fell off hitting his head. For those who have a husband in a nursing home with dementia, how often do you visit or call and Check on them? I visit twice a day or call and check on him twice a day. Is that too often? Just called the hospital and talked to Kevin's nurse. He managed to pull hs feeding tube and IV out even though they have mittens on him. Been crying. It's so hard on me because we do everything together and he doesn't even recognize me. I also dont have the support

My husband has dementia and is in alheimers/dementia facility. The nurses have told me he hasn't slept in a couple of days. He sits down for a few seconds to and gets right back up. He does nothing but walk around.

Talked to my husband's nurse today and she said he was up all night last night. Today he was grabbing other residents hands wanting them to walk with him. He finally feel asleep. He doesn't know me when I visit him at Alheimers/Dementia facility. I don't like dementia. It stole my husband away from me. Tuesday the facility where my husband is, had to hook him up to an IV for dehydration. I went Wednesday and he has to be fed and he didn't even know I was there. Today the nurse aid the they had trouble drawing his blood but finally got it. They are pushing fluids. He has been sleeping but has walked around a little. I'm having a hard time with this

Need opinion please. My husband was in hospital because his heart rate dropped extremely low and was unresponsive. He has dementia. I spent 9-10 hours the last few days at hospital and went to facility when he got back. Should I take this weekend off and just call to check on or go to facility? I'm exhausted.

My husband is in a Alzheimer's/dementia community. A dentist came there and checked him out and said he needs his teeth pulled and dentures. I don't think he can sit still long enough to do this. When I visit him he can't sit still and nurses say he is always up and walking. Don't know what to do

Husband still in hospital. Neurologists said it's advanced dementia. He has GI consult tomorrow for feeding tube so he won't be one severely dehydrated again. Then will go back to nursing home. He has gone down hill so fast in the last two months. We we're inseparable and this is so hard on me. They brought my husband from nursing home to hospital yesterday and admitted him. The snurse said he is severely dehydrated and has septsis. Ever since my husband was dehydrated about a month ago he hasn't got all his strength back. He walks with his knees bent and very unsteady. He is in a alheimers facility

My husband has vascular dementia. He is in a alheimers community. Today he was walking the halls and called me Santa Claus.

Went to visit my husband Monday and was shaking so bad they had to put him in wheelchair. Didn't even know I was there. The nurse checked his sugar and it was fine. Went yesterday to visit, he was still in wheelchair and very weak in the ones. He knew I was there but didn't know my name. This disease has advanced very fast on my husband. We we're inseparable and know it's just the dogs and I. I go twice a day to visit him.

My husband was put in a nursing on Wednesday for his dementia. He has broken things, wanders in other rooms and gets up on the bed and stands. I go visit him twice a day. Sometimes he knows me sometimes he doesn't. The nurse says it's normal for dementia patients to do this until they get used to being there I'm having a hard time dealing with all can this when a couple months ago he wasn't this way. Our anniversary is Wednesday, October 31 and we did everything together

Anyone's LO have a blank stare? My husband does this and needs help walking, eating and has a catheter. Hospital won't do one thing.

At hospital with husband for his dementia. It's getting worse and he won't admit it. My husband is in a nursing home now and still doesn't know me. Is anyone else's LO destructive? He is. The nurse said that comes along with dementia.

My husband is in an alheimers/dementiaa facility. I feel so guilty because I cannot visit him. I call every day and the nurses tell me how he is and that he's doing fine and being taken care of. I live in a hotel and cannot leave my dogs alone there and can't afford to take them to daycare. But I still feel guilty. My husband has dementia. Some days he knows me some days he doesnt. He eats with his hands instead of using silverware. Lately when I visit my husband in the alheimers/dementia facility all he does is walk. He won't sit still long enough for me to have a conversation with him. Today I had to leave because he got me so upset. I was visiting him every day. But I'm going to cut down to every other day or three times a week. I feel it's taking a toll on me

My husband has some and was in hospital for a few days in last week. His heart rate dropped real low and was unresponsive. While he was there the Dr gave him medicine to keep him calm and restrained him because he tried to get out of bed. Ever since he came back to facility he's at, he has be haviotal problems. The other day he tried grabbing a guys hand and the guy smacked his face. He was ok. Today the nurse told me he was swinging at the staff. This isn't him. I think it's a combination of the medicine they gave him in hospital and restraining him has affected his dementia more. Just had to vent. UPDATE lifesquad took him to er to check him out and released him

Last night he wouldn't let me sleep. He also tried to get his dog from barking and instead grabbed my head scared me and hurt me

I know he has dementia but now he has a phobia of not being ableto get out of the car. My patience is wearing thin. We have to sleep in car tonight. I was on phone to several senior agencies today. They would give resources but no help. Why is it that they love Ice-cream so much I had a half a pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream that’s my favorite and my mom eat it all and I didn’t get any of it! We go through 6 gallons of ice cream a week and that’s the only thing she seems to be eating Thank you so much for letting me join this group, I have Learned a lot my mom, my best friend my life my world went home to be with Jesus two weeks ago. I will miss her. So I will save some room for other people to join the group, thanks again for letting me join stay strong everyone and God Bless prayers go out to all of you Oh man I really hate this disease! With this frigid weather is really making my mom anxious! And I really don’t know what to do I am at my wits end my Boyfriend and I and also a really good friend of ours have been my moms caregiver, I can’t do this anymore! I need to start finding a place for us and his daughter. Man I really do hate this disease, Man I hate this disease! Sorry for venting but I hate this disease! It’s not fare God I hate this Disease it’s like dealing with toddlers even worse Man I hate this Disease!

I hate dementia’ it is a horrible disease why can’t they find a cure! God I hate Dementia! I always a child and God never blessed me with one, and now I am Dealing with my mom who is 83 with dementia she is like a baby 樂 I can’t deal with it anymore Please to give me everybody from the post I just had to vent Sorry I have to vent again why isn't there a cure for this damn f"""king disease, my Mom is still alive but it taken her brain, she is dead it's not her anymore, so I am losing my faith, so if there is a God then why does he put people though this! Damn it sorry but I have to vent me and ma daddy x My Daddy with me and his grandsons xxx I find these visits very difficult but I really enjoyed today he was very happy to see us and content x

We have had news tonight that ma big pal ma dad is going into care it's been a hard hard decision but we live 3 miles away and there are a lot of us involved x we love you papa xxx樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂

Who posted about council tax my mum and dad still paying and dad been diagnosed 5 years UK question xx This is ma daddy and ma boy my dad has vascular dementia and altziemers 5 years diagnosed an amazing man and still is xxx x love this group cause it makes you understand a little more every day and make it easier on them x love from Scotland Where is everyone from I live in Scotland x my dad been in respite for 2 weeks how will he be when he comes home ???? my dad has had a social work visit which means he may get rest bite do you think this make deterioration happen quicker ??? he has lost all short term memory bit still ma daddy and just wondered if rest bit makes it come on quicker he has been diagnosed about 5 years dementia and altziemers x thanks hiya from scotland x my daddy went into care for a week x should we visit he has his guitar and seems ok just us that aint x i feel like i have left him all alone with love we are lucky we have their memories loce him forever樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂 and a day x

So after another struggle trying to get Mom out of bed this morning. she didn't get up and have breakfast until like 11:15. I was able to capture this Precious Moment just don't few minutes ago

Moms having a pretty good day today.樂樂

Not even sure how to write this. My knee and hip have been bothering for many years but it's slowly progressing and getting worse so we're talking about a possible hip replacement. Bothering me so much I have actually missed work. Yesterday I started feeling a cold come on. However now couple nights ago all say mom started becoming kind of combative and not at doing as I asked such as getting up off the chair and going to the bathroom going to bed. Today it's gotten a little worse.not sure how much longer I can keep her in my home. I hurt. When we first decided to live together we made a pack of being a team. Shes not much of a team player any more. I work full time out side the house and well. Am thinking a nursing home is her very near future,can much as I dont want that to happen. This disease does really suck. It breaks families. I've you mom, but 8 want the real mom back. I hate you dementia...I HATE you, especially sundowners Not sure how much longer I'll be able to be her caregiver. I love my mom to death, but I'm thinking my own wellbeing may be coming compromised

I really dislike bedtime. Yesterday and today I haven't been feeling well a little sinus headache some stomach problems. But all day today Mom and I have been doing really good up until trying to put her to bed. I had to take a break and come out to the living room and and send this message on here. I love my mom to death but sometimes I just have to take a break and cry. Mom turned 95 today, her main caretaker Wendy brought this doll to her today. Plus she still folded laundry for me as well. Her favorite activity. My mom singing something and a picture of the 2 of us on our deck this afternoon.

Hopefully this video of my soon to be 94 year old mother with dementia singing Jesus loves me will brighten your day. It brightened up my day. She sang it numerous times randomly throughout the day yesterday. Please say a few prayers for my 94 year old momma who went into hospital yesterday morning. COPD, UTI, bronchitis and a little pnemonia. She's a trooper tho. And my house is to quiet. Just curious to see if any of your loved ones with dementia pulls their hair out of their head and puts it between their thumb and index finger on each hand and then kind of like lays it on there pants or on the arm of the chair? And if so how have you stop them from doing that? My 94 year old mother with dementia just started doing this couple weeks ago.

Sitting in my recliner in the living room crying. So I'm having a hip replacement August 23rd I have been in a lot of pain lower back left hip down to my knee. My mom 95 years old I love her to death she understands until asked a couple times a day when are you have going in to see the doctor. This morning I woke her up she was fine wanted 10 more minutes that's fine I gave her 10 minutes went back in to get her up she wanted 10 more I said Mama I'm really hurting today I need your help nope wanted nothing to do with it I finally coaxed her up to get into her wheelchair and got her into the bathroom. Try to get her to grab ahold of her a handicap bar to stand her up I let her sit in the bathroom in her wheelchair for a minute or two. Went back in she was able to grab ahold of the bar but then got kind of snippy again. I just can't do it today. I'm not sure how much longer I can keep my 94 year-old mother in my home. Today was a crap day. Literally crap, she had a very loose stool while sitting in her recliner this afternoon. I keep a waterproof liner on it. So I got her up off of there had her use her walker I helped her in the bathroom that are set down and it was all over everything. She wasn't assisting me and trying to get her cleaned up. She wasn't assisting me once I got her cleaned up and get her clothes back on. Very frustrating she's slept and hummed almost all afternoon in her recliner I tried to get her to color but she really didn't want to do much of that. Now I just brought her back on the pot again and trying to get her to change her panty and put her regular pants back on has been a chore. I work full time my brother cares for her and I have a dear friend that takes care of her also when I'm not able to but it's just getting to be a bit much for me. Twice today now I broken down and cried I've had to leave the room frustrated. Thought I just post on here and get it off my chest. And like other people have been saying other people that don't go through this don't understand so I'm so grateful for this group thank you and I love you all.

Mom and I had a wonderful time at our family reunion yesterday. Woke her up this morning she was still in a good mood. Put her on the pot and cleaned her up get her dressed, have her stand up so I can start wiping she starts peeing that's one pair of pants but I had to wash, not anymore what the third pair of pants on her that was good she had breakfast and I put her on the pot again after breakfast. She's been in there quite a while she's doing her Duty. Finally get her up to clean her up start wiping so, she starts peeing again. So we're on our fourth pair of pants today. I left the room came out to the living room and that's where I am now crying I don't know how much longer I can take this. It gets so frustrating. I really wanted to surprise her and take take her in her wheelchair and go down the street about 5 blocks so she can see her sister that was not able to attend the reunions because she's not feeling the best. It's already 1 o'clock. Not sure if we're going to go or not. Well wish me luck I'm going back in the bathroom to try to get her up off the pot thanks for letting me vent love you guys Please say a prayer for my mother who is 93 with dementia and myself. Today isn't a good day. I don't know how much longer I can take care of her. I'm trying to do what I can and keep her out of the nursing home but things are getting worse and more happening more often where as I can't control her. She won't remember what happened but I do and it hurts.

Mom said she hated me this morning as I was trying to get her out of bed and ready for the day. This was a first. I know she didn't mean it but it still hurt. I want me mom back. If I can't have her back then let her be with my dad (her husband) and her mom in Mom really tried my patience last night.

Moms starting out with a tantrum type of morning and I'm not feeling all that great, got myself a spring cold...grrrr

Not the good day at least not starting out very good. Want to get up Mom she didn't want to get up get me 10 more minutes give me 20 more minutes so I gave her a half hour okay maybe more than that. Got her up and into the bathroom and got her clothes changed her dentures in her hair combed. And now I know she's hungry she wants pancakes. But she just sit hunched over on the toilet doesn't want to get up and grab ahold of the bar so I can get her up and wipe her. Very frustrating when she's had the last days are good. I had to give myself a timeout I'm out in the recliner in the living room now it's so frustrating. I don't generally post on here not my frustrations. But I just had to this morning Great visit with this guy today. Gave him haircut, shave and mini manicure. He was trying to be funny with the camera. Lol

Now that dad's in a home full time I have so many mixed emotions that are churning around inside of me. I'm sad that's he's at the stage that that's where he needs to be and that will be his forever home. I worry that they won't take as good of care or pay as much of attention to the little things as I did. I feel guilty for putting him in full care instead of not taking care of him my self full time as I read so many of you do. I'm selfishly relieved that I don't have to be his main caregiver anymore and deal with the daily struggles of this horrible disease. Im happy that I get to just love him and cherish our visits together. So many emotions over this move. On we go....

Ok so... 8 weeks in hospital waiting and we finally got placed into a nursing home today. First hour there he went to a New Year's Eve "party" and danced his heart out AND to think the hospital told me he is officially wheelchair bound. ...HAHAHA Fingers crossed all goes ok for first night. He certainly doesn't like change and he can be feisty!! Here's a little dancing video to put a smile on your fac! Dad's 83rd birthday. First one that I can remember we didn't go out for dinner. We brought cake and party to him. Happy birthday dad. Just finished clearing out my dad's apartment. Also just finished decorating his room at the nursing home. My body starting to shut down. Feeling flu like symptoms coming on... Ugh Not taking care of myself. :( Remember caretakers... We have to take care of ourselves as well or we are useless to our LO. Friendly fact... Start LO and YOURSELF on Royal Red Krill Oil. It's amazing. I give and take about 1500mg a day (That's all he'd take). You can do more if you/they will take it. I swear by this stuff. They are small and easy to swallow and no fishy burps either!! Obviously not a cure but made dad more clear. Much more good days then bad and it's a preventative for me. The hospital has even asked me to bring it so they can continue giving it to him. PICTURE IS JUST FOR REFERENCE. You can buy it anywhere vitamins are sold. Is anyone using CBD for their LO? Outcome?

Has anyone had or have considered getting genetic testing done to see if they have the Alzheimer's gene? I'm thinking about it... Please share Also, what have you changed in your personal daily routine as preventative measures to delay getting it.?

Advice needed.... My dad (Alzheimers) best golf/travel mate of 40+ yrs just passed away suddenly. Still not sure what the cause. It's heartbreaking. 10yrs younger and living life. Regardless... he has been the one that has stayed in touch and visited through his diagnosis, move, hospital, nursing home. Dad acts almost like he's not sick, like he's seeing him in the pub not a nursing home when he comes to visit him and Greets him by first and last name every time.

My dilemma is.... I'm torn whether to tell him tommy has passed and that he's no longer here. Breaks my heart to think of dad mourning the loss of his friend or maybe not remember and asking over and over for him and having to explain he's passed and him mourning everytime I have to retell him. Also the service?? Omg..Do I take him? What if he doesn't understand?? 樂樂

Update: we got his blood and urine tests done two weeks ago. No delirium or infection.

My 83yr old father is in what I believe to be stage 6 dementia from Alzheimer's. He currently is still residing in indepentant living. I feel it's time to move him. He won't go down for meals any more and is having accidents in his bed and sleeps in it all night not knowing to change himself. I've hired home services but I feel he needs more 24hr care. The bc system is not helping much thus far. The guilt of having to move him is even worse. Am I wrong in thinking it's time for more help or a move?

It's moments like this that make this all "bearable". Still a biter sweet moment to see him at his prime and then to see what this disease has done. We have to remember who they were before this dreadful disease.

Since arriving in emerg last night, They have run every test possible to rule out why he is declining so fast, looking for a medical reason. Everything coming back clear.....

My mom and dad meet in there early teens. Had two boys in the 50's, immigrated to Canada in the 60's together. Had me in the 70's and divorced in the 80's. Either remarried. Remained best friends. She visits at least 3x a week and is my rock through this whole process. This was my mom's first visit in his new place. He couldn't remember her name this visit but when I asked him who she was he says "that's my sweetheart."

Then they sang this song... ❤ Just lost one of my aunties this morning. So heartbreaking as she is the first of all my dads siblings to go. May she rest in peace and be forever free of this horrible disease. I hate it!!!

My grandmother, my great aunt, now my aunt all passed from this sickening disease.

Rocking on to our 9th hour at emergency. Only took me that long to think of getting my laptop and start a movie on Netflix. Thank you Fraser Health for free Wi-Fi. I don't think dad will ever be going home again. He is no longer fit to be alone. We have hit what I believe to be Stage 6. .... 樂 Super emotional day. My fiance, Chris and I headed over to my mom's place. We decided while there, he'd take her to get the bed frame since hers broke the other day. I would stay and go through her photos since they seem to cause her distress and she's ALWAYS playing with them and carrying them around. She was in the beginning stage of a meltdown when I got there, but calmed right down when she saw me. I told her Chris was taking her to get a bed frame and I had to go home. She doesn't remember my car, so I walk out with them, Chris takes her to my car and off they go. I walked the other way, turned around go back in. I go into her room, and go through all her photos.Some are torn up. No particular theme either. Older pics before my brother and I were born were torn, pics of just her in her younger years, pics of her with my brother and I. It was so random, I didn't know what to make of it. SO, I decided to take almost all her pictures. Including her beautiful high school photo which is in perfect condition even though it's from the late 60's. I just can't risk her tearing them up. I left, got in my car, and just started crying. I feel like a criminal. Her brain is stealing her memories, and now I am, too. But, I'm just trying to keep these memories safe, and reduce her anxious behaviors. Often when she has a behavior she is looking or holding

My momma was having a good day today! I brought her some essential oils, a diffuser and an elephant diffuser necklace. She loved it all!! 樂 Thankful for days like today as yesterday was not so good.

I am so happy today! I was worried my mom would be having a bad day. I haven't stopped by in a week. I don't mean to sound horrible, but it's part of my self care. On occassion, I won't visit for a few days. There are times I need a break from being around people with dementia, and being I work in the field, and am studying it...It's rare to never I get a break from it. Anyway, I never go more than a week. If they call and need me, I'm there immediately though. So, I hadn't seen her in a week. My fiance stopped by on Saturday and visited her though. Today, I stopped by to bring her 2 pairs of leggings I had bought her. One had elephants on them, and elephants are her favorite, so I had to get them lol. She LOVES leggings, and is always complementing mine, so I bought her a few pairs of the brand I like. She LOVED them, and ran to her room to put them on lol! :D Anyway, she was in the BEST mood today. I love when my momma is having great days! Warms my heart. Anyway, just had to share. It's so nice to be pleasantly surprised. <3 Although today was a great day spent with my momma, I left feeling a little sad. And this makes me feel bad for not focusing on the good. During lunch my mom was asking about her dad (who passed 1/1999). She was saying she hopes he's doing well and she misses him. This is her new concern. Up until a few months ago, she knew he was gone. A new thing that I just noticed today...she loves talking about how when I was little I called my younger brother, "Gockel," because I couldn't pronounce his name, which is, Michael. She always calls him that as an inside joke, and tells everyone this story of how I called him this. Today, she was joking about how her dad called him that, and not me. I almost cried, but I acted normal and just laughed. Very slowly I am seeing her long term memory leave in tiny bits and it breaks my heart. BUT, I am so thankful she is unaware of all of this. She was just so incredibly happy today. It was heartwarming to see her having such an amazing day! Some days, she's sad and moody. So, I cherish when I can see MY mom in there underneath this awful disease. Anyway, just blabbering and getting it out. A great day, but sad at the same time. Thanks for reading/listening. I appreciate this group so much 樂 Took my momma out and she was so happy. Talking to strangers and browsing. As we left, she says..."I dread going back to that place." Broke my heart. Today was a hard visit. My mother was sexually abused as a little girl. Lately she has been having flashbacks, hitting and pushing away the care staff, believing they are either her grandfather, or are trying to abuse her. So, I'm slowly taking photos that are not of people I know or know who they are. I started crying. I hate taking her photos, but when she is looking at old photos (which is every day) she has meltdowns. Since I was only 3 when her grandfather died, I don't know what he looks like, and anyone that would know him, is dead. So, I feel this is best. I spoke to staff and asked them to just take the photos when she's not around, and I'll go through them to ensure they're "safe people" to look at and remember. This was so hard to do, and I've been considering it for weeks, as her anxiety and breakdowns occur when looking at pictures. But this was the clincher. It broke my heart knowing she was remembering this. These were repressed memories that didn't come to her til her early 30's. A mother's instinct is amazing though. After these memories returned, she had answered questions. The abuse occurred when on his lap from the time she was 2 or 3 to about 10. The handful of times I saw him before he died when I was 3, he'd pick me up to put We had an amazing time at the lunch provided by the facility my mom lives at. This weekend we're hoping to take her on a light cruise. Not sure if next year she'll be able to, so hoping it works out. Merry Christmas everyone! ❤樂

I just wanted to address the religion topic. There are no rules prohibiting religious posts at this time. Should that change, group founders will notify us. For now, if the post goes against your own beliefs, please ignore and do not comment anything negative. Let people share their source of strength and support. For some, faith in a religion is a huge support and that is fine, since this is a support group. That being said, the opposite is also true. Those sharing religious posts are NOT to post rude comments to those who share they do not believe, or share the same beliefs. This is a "support" group. If you see a post that you don't agree with or don't find support in, and provided it doesn't violate any rules...keep scrolling, please. We will not always agree with one another, but this is not a religious debate group. Thank you everyone for making this a great group!

This is the first Mother's Day where I could not really communicate with my mom. I'm heartbroken. I hate this f-ing disease. We shared stories and sang songs, and she sang along with us, but other than that, she can't really talk. Music is such a wonderful way to reach them...that and telling old stories. I told her stories she told my brother and I growing up, and she laughed, so I know she remembered 樂 Before dinner we stopped by to bring cupcakes to my mom and the other residents. Today is my birthday, and we always bring her. She's had AD for 4 years. This is the first birthday we decided to not bring her. Dinner in noisy restaurants is just too much for her. I broke down yesterday after discussing it and making

Has anyone had success with using essential oils, like in a diffuser or on jewelry to assist with anxiety and associated behaviors? I use lavender and other essential oils in a burner as part of my self-care. I started to think, they'd help my mom. So, I'm considering purchasing a diffuser and some essential oils for my mother when she's beginning to slide into an anxious episode. Staff say they can see the change slowly occur in her face and body language. I'm thinking essential oils could help head it off. Please no trying to sell me product. I have a brand I love that I purchase from my local natural and organic food store. Thank you! 樂 So question...I'm a social work student graduating in May. A project I am working on with a group is creating the curriculum for a caregiver support group. Caregivers often lack support. However, support is easily found for struggling family members. Resources are often tossed at them from every direction, which is very needed of course, however caregivers whether they are related to the individual or not, lack support and it's often not easy to find. Furthermore, many don't see the need, viewing paid caregivers as not needing it since it's "their job." So, it isn't that tough on them because you're unrelated and getting paid . As a former caregiver, this theory is garbage, as I'm sure most of you would agree. My question is, if there was an in person caregiver support group near you, would you attend? Or if there is one near you, do you attend?Thanks for helping!

With the many new members, as a moderator, I'd like to take a minute to remind everyone to please read the rules of this group. Also to remind everyone that this is a safe place to vent. There will be posts you may not agree with, some may be the type of posts you yourself would not share. This is ok. They have a right to share what they want as long as it doesn't violate the rules. The intended purpose of this group is to have a safe place to vent. Venting isn't always pretty. We are all fighting our own battle. We are hurting, frustrated, angry, etc. and not everyone deals with it the same way. There will be posts we will run into that we don't like. If you can't be supportive, please scroll by. This is what I do when I see posts I dont' agree with. This is not a debate group. It's a support group. I hope it was okay to share this. Thank you all for understanding, and all of the support you have given me. I love this group so much!

Our beautiful mama gained her wings at 2:15 am yesterday. I am in a complete fog. I hurt like I've never hurt. I feel like there is a literal hole in my chest. I am beyond lucky to have been able to stroke her hair, kiss on her and hold her hand as she took her final breath. What a blessing the Lord gave me! It will be beyond difficult to learn a new way of life without her here, but I rejoice in the fact she is free of a disease that so often left her feeling confused and scared. Be free, mama. Rejoice with all those who left before you, who you loved so much. I love you, mama 樂樂樂 Peggy Childers 1950-2019.

I got a call Wednesday of last week that my sweet mama was imminent. 6 days later she is still fighting. My heart is breaking in half. My head hurts from crying so much. I sit here day and night by her side, telling her I love her. I sponge her mouth, massage her legs, feet and arms. It's something I am so incredibly blessed to be able to do for her. No one deserves this disease. No one deserves to watch someone they love forget amazing memories, then watch them slowly die. It is quite possibly one of the most evil diseases ever.

I come here asking for prayers for the Lord to take her home and release her from this horrific disease. I want my mama to rest and be free of all of this pain. Thank you. Yesterday was one of the most difficult days of my life. I know harder days are to come though. Yesterday, I met with a funeral director to arrange my mother's services. She is currently on hospice. We chose to do this to get it out of the way, and so we don't have to worry about it when that day comes. As I entered the building, my hands shook, and I felt sick to my stomach. I fought back tears, which is normally easy for me. No matter how hard I fought, the tears just flowed. It was something I would not wish on anyone...ever. I'm not looking for sympathy, just prayers, and sharing another piece of this journey that I hate and is so unfair. Sadly, I know many here will understand. This is me and my momma. She's been living with dementia for 4 years. She's so strong, and despite severe depression, she is always trying to make the other residents smile or comfort them. She's has many bad days, but days like this make me thankful. This is my mom. This is also my mom telling Alzheimer's..."not today!" 樂 I'd like to thank you for adding me to this group. I'll take a minute to introduce myself and why I'm here. I'm 44, my brother 43. My mother was 63 when we started noticing odd, but minor symptoms. I had just started back to college majoring in geriatric social work. I have a semester to go, and I intern at a skilled nursing facility. My passion is working with those diagnosed with dementia and their families. I was also a caregiver for several years caring for those with dementia. Anyway back in 2013 my mom checked herself into a behavioral health center afraid she was going to harm herself. She had an MRI done and the doctor said her MRI showed "normal changes for a woman her age, and her memory issues were due to depression." I didn't know what I know now, so I trusted him. Her symptoms got worse, and another doctor said she had unspecified dementia. She was living with me for about a year at this point. I became unable to provide all the care and supervision she needed with my busy life, children, work and school; so I talked to her about assisted living. I didn't want to rush her, so I was just patient. After about a year, she agreed and came to me. In 2015 we moved her into a nice assisted living facility, where she is now. About a month ago she was taken to the ER with stroke like symptoms, and another MRI was done. No stroke. This time, I

This is such an amazing and supportive group. I found so much love and support, even advise when my mama was alive. Now that she's gone, I at times find myself jealous and frustrated of those who post their bad days. Not saying not to share those times, lol, I certainly did. We need to vent. It's a horrible disease. But one thing I never heard, that I would like to share as a piece of advise, now that I've experienced both frustration and grief: My advise is, be grateful for the bad days no matter how hard, and even MORE grateful for the good days. Once you are on this side, grieving the physical presence of your loved one...you would do anything for even a bad day. I would. I would give my right arm to have another moment to hug and kiss my mama...even when she was not her sweet self, and being a pain lol. One day, you'll ache for even a bad day. I do.  Tryna get her to eat. My cuz is. 樂樂樂樂 Mommi yesterday, she was eatting, Getting better but she Ready 2 go home Mommy yesterday. I brought her a fish sandwich to eat.(good process) and what they serve her and couple more(some ppls had different dinners). That krazy. Menisa Howard LaShelle Livinglife Thomas. She getting there. I'm so happy, mommy doing gd. She talking, recognize everybody and trying to walk again. Her womb is gettin better. Like my cuz always said may God be the glory. Amen.

Momma doing good and she is comfortable where she's at. She's in a new facility and I like them so far. They have more than the last facility for her and resources also more care and health to heal her. I had to move her I didn't like the last facility and they shouldn't be open. Also met the Disease Control Health Doctor, I never met last doctor at the last facility. He updated me with theirs plans for ma. She talked to me today, felt so good to hear her talk and for her 2 know who I am. I love her so much.The bed is much better and i like the way they clean her. Let see how this goes. Menisa Howard Update-Birthday was a success. God is gd. She talking and moving. Finally let me get her together. Hello everyone, I haven't been the same since ma left and my life had change. I'm glad I was able to enjoy 35 wonderful yrs with my ma. She will always be luv and never forgotten樂樂樂樂. I appreciated all the love I receive on here(ya'll r like family)-thanks 4 the luv

Sorry to inform everyone, momma got her wings last night. I'm hurting and just keep us in prays. Mommi doing good. Her and her god-grandbabies. She is eatting and i just can't wait to get this house together. I also added an video.(Yesterday) Mom this past summer(not to long ago) be4 she had to leave her home to live with me. She was happy. Ig moving her from her environment, she shut down. I love her eventho we don't see eye to eye. Get better mom. LaShelle Livinglife Thomas. Menisa Howard Me and mommi

Mommi doing better. I took granbabies 2 see her and she was happy, playin with them and eatting snack. Mommy after her biopsy yesterday, she was big 樂 mad. I love her anyway. She talking and communicating better. She look like she picking up weight and tryna walk again. This group/fam help me get ova my worries 樂 and support. Thanks Momma and her babies. She is doing gd. Just gotta keep an eye on her blood

Update:Mom is doing good. The dr said her blood count is good and she is healthy. The heart doctor said she is good also. Just waiting to bring her home. I believe she was mad at me. Mommy doing good, doctor appt was a success and now she eatting lunch. LaShelle Livinglife Thomas Menisa Howard 樂樂樂樂. Her bday tomorrow. Mom doing good. Tomorrow removing ventilator. God is good and prays. Thanks everyone's

Update: Mom gd. I feels better. She breathing on her own over the ventilator and she on her own blood pressure. She do have an infection(uti) and (pressure swore) could be in the blood causing the swelling in her body and something bout the vein. Dey have to put fluid in her to flush out the infection. The ventilator was to help air hole from closing and they never did have to revive her she always have breathe on her own. They also have her heavily sedated to keep her comfortable and she is on pain meds and antibiotics. There is more to be done, but she is a fighter.Thanks everyone's for prays and concern(i appreciated it).

This really pissed me off my mom was rushed to the hospital this morning near 6am and nobody knows why, she was rushed to the hospital all they know that her left side of her face was swollen and now she is on a ventilator. The doctors trying to put it together what happened and what's going on they have to revive her because she wasn't breathing on her own. Now there's a tube down her throat and she's in ICU. The Rehab Clinic said they was keeping an eye on her but nothing was changing. How you went from being happy 5 days ago and now in ICU. Ever since you left my care she been sicker I don't like it. Time to get her home. When I went to go see her Saturday all she said was give me my shoes I'm ready to go and the nurse getting on her nerves . She was trying to tell me something . She ready to come home . This a old pix. She doing better. Just waiting on the pressure ulcer to heal and she'll be coming home. She was just going thru a moment cause she wasn't with us every day. Went to c her Sunday afternoon yesterday. She said to me the first time in awhile, i wanna go home and I'm not eatting notin(that what she want). She finally read my notes, I write her. She tried to go the bathrm on her own and she said she have to use the bathrm. Luv her and i just have to be more carefuln with her. LaShelle Livinglife Thomas Menisa Howard Pray for my mom she was rush to the hospital yesterday from the rehabilitation/nursing, i forgot to post. I was dealing with the issues that happen. Also thank 4 da like of the pictures and love.. We appreciated it. God bless u all and much love ❤ Seem my mom yesterday 111918 and it really start 2 hit reality, that she sick. there no denial nomore, dat she does have dementia Keep momma in y'all prays. She not getting any better as I thought. It seen she giving up She didn't want me to wipe her eye yesterday, so ig i was getting on her nerves.

Mom will still take a bath on her own but she has stopped washing her forehead. 樂樂 I’m thinking of taking her in for facials but gotta find a spa with products she’s not allergic to. when i tease her about not washing her forehead she laughs at me. Glad she still thinks I’m silly. Yay, it’s a victory day!! Mom and I are ’vacationing’ at my cousin‘s house. I was able to get her out of her jammies and wash all of her clothes!! She even took a bath! Wahooo!! It’s a good day! I managed to not ask mom why she kept changing her clothes as we were getting ready!! I just kept walking out and back in. Finally caught her in an outfit and said ‘Good! You’re ready!!!!’ now to get her out the door!! My Mom's having a good day. With stage 4 dementia sometimes she can't remember how to prepare cedar for weaving but today she's doing great!!! Wahoo Wow, Moms heater has been on the fritz all week and her caregiver never called me. ?? The Caregiver said she never alerted me “because I thought you've set the heater that low!” Um, wow. The house was 60F when I got here at 10:30 a.m. I’m looking for a new caregiver Has anyone considered taking their loved ones overseas for better care. I visited the memory care facilities in my area that my Mom can afford and they reek of urine. It’s horrifying So nice to be down at my Dads house where I don’t have to lock my doors to get a moment of peace!! so thankful for the respite care at my Mom’s house

We sent Mom on a staycation with my niece and spent three days cleaning her room. We sent five bags and two boxes to the Goodwill. Another five bags of recycling. 10 boxes of craft materials. When she came home it took her less than an hour to have her bed completely covered again . At least there is less in her room for her to work with. I need a nap and a glass of wine Just need to rant. I keep putting bills on auto pay at my Moms and I just realized she takes them off, when the water was shut off. I so thought I was just loosing my mind Until I called the water company and was told the autopay was taken off months ago. I was never qualified to run one household, and now I’m running two. At least I got a place to rant. Thank you guys, just needed some mountain screaming. got it out of my system. better now.

I am the care taker for both of my parents. Thier houses are about 30 minutes apart. my Mom has stage 4 dementia and my Dad has diabetes & his kidneys are failing. There is only so much that I can do thank god for the help of my cousins and Niece. It is not a question of love or ability or effort. It is about safety. WHEN the time comes that my Mom is no longer safe in her home, I will find memory care for her. Please feel free to come here and judge me. That way I can get a cup of coffee while you sit and visit my Mom. I will be so grateful for the help. P.S thank you Jennifer Famiano for your marvelous words of support! you said it perectly!! I have caregiver question not a dementia question. So if this is inappropriate please delete it. my dear friend was a caregiver for 5 years for her mom who had emphysema and mental issues. Like me, my friend has physical impairments (hers are from a botched surgery). She was not able to keep her Mom’s houses clean but did everything else in her power to keep her Mom, fed, medicated, treated, etc. Now my oh, tough day!! She wants to move back home. But there's so much more drugs. And too many of our wonderful relatives have passed on. This is a hug her, turn on her fav show and go fix me a cup of coffee day. Take 3,? Maybe time to distract her another way.... my Mom and I have never been close and as her lone caretaker, I’m gettng better at letting go and rolling with dementia. But I am done, so done, with her coffee issues She started by dismantling my cofffee grinder, pot and dispersing the filters, creamer, etc no matter where I hid or locked them. So I switched to concentrate, cold brew then instant. Still she just can’t leave them alone. I just found the brand new jar ...empty! Empty! And in the recycle. So now ... Hi, I’m lora I hoard coffee and paraphenalia in my room. p.s. and ground cinnamon. (she leaves the stick cinnamon alone though.) I stopped in to see Iris, my gramma’s cousin, who also has dementia but is only stage 3. It was a startling visit. Her daughter, who lives in another state, has decided that visitors are no longer needed for her mom. The main visitors are Iris’s friends who are local police officers who stop by for coffee. The daughter has also canceled Iris’ house cleaner and massages. She wants her to stop going to her senior I’m a caregiver for my dementia stage 4/5 Mom. Today I’m back in the ER to treat my medical troubles and I’m so irked that my mom took my sleep mask from my hospital bag. Why does dementia know what need most and lead our LOs right to it!!!! Grrr dementia sucks.

Omg, how do I choose. Dementia care or dementia meds? i just got back from dealing with the cops. Mom left her house, in the snow and ended up at a local gas station. She does this less when she’s on expensive anti depressants but fights taking them . So she just needs to take them or go into a home. I am so sick of dealing with the cops. i just need help. She just needs help Omg I hate this so much My mom walked in on me In the bathroom today. I was so upset. She is stage 4/5 dementia. I hate that I was more upset that she still remembered how to unlock the bathroom door. But then again I’ve been doing this awful dementia thing foe ten years. She didn’t react at all that I was sick with the flu. Puking is not a thing. A locked door is Mom just woke me up saying she needed to call the radio to claim her prize. I managed to divert her and she headed toward the bathroom. It got quiet so I checked her and she had plugged the toilet and flooded the bathroom.. Sigh oh nooo. I think I left my car keys out in the living room where my LO could get them. Sigh, good thing I have more copies than memory!

My Dad is the best. Today he told me he should stop driving. Im so grateful he came to this decision himself. It will make things interesting since I am FT caretaker for my mom for the last ten years. But my Dad has been so amazingly supportive to me through my mom’s dementia journey that i will make this work. Btws they have been divorced for nearly 50 years!!

Ok, my moms car is missing. I came home from taking care of my Dad and mom had got ahold her keys, took hercar and now it's gone, I have no clue how she got home but she did. She even has her car keys. Im having one of those other caregiver moments. I'm struggling with the frustration of her behaviour patterns. She 'reorganizes' things by moving them from drawer to drawer or room to room. this repetitive stuff can be mind boggling on my own but when dealing with new people or family members who don't come see her often... well you know. So a friend of the family is helping my mom put up her kitchen curtains. again. this is the third time they've needed to be rehung. Its her current thing. He thought I was nuts to use command hooks. but I'm tired of fixing the holes in the walls. he pushed back nicely about "fixing it right for her". Im grateful I didn't have to rehang them. but I also really wish I didn't have to explain it again.

What a tough time tonight. Mom got 'stuck' on visiting a friend tonight. Although Eric is wonderful with her, his wife Anne is so, well, we need to call first she can clean the bathroom before we come over. It was such a huge deal for Mom, but how do I explain that we just can't drop in on Anne??? It wasnt as bad as it could be. I just drove to their house. Went to a dark house around the block and when no one answered, we left. It was a long aweful drive but seemed to calm Mom down. We got some dinner and i think she's settled down. I so so wish that Anne would be ok. But not everyone can get this. dementia takes a certain heart to understand. and it is so bewildering for those of us who deal with it on a daily basis. It must be aweful for those who only see it once in a while. Mom mom is still so able though. God forbid she show up there all on her own!!! some of the wierd changes from my Mom’s dementia include spices. I go to cook and there’s no dill in the cupboard. ?? she’s also odd about ground cinnamon. She will leave the stick cinnamon alone just not the ground. Unless it’s mixed with sugar. MomBtws, wasshe stillwell likes enough to eat to bothgo to seasonIngs my nieces babybut won’t shower let butthem it wasbe stored so hard in Tothe get cupboard her ready. or fridge.I had set 樂樂 everything out the night before but she was so confused. She had so much fun, but when I look at the pictures from the shower, I realized I never even brushed my

Oh Mom has had so many good days on this trip. But now that we are stuck in traffic she is sundowning so bad. But my Aunt Jan is spectacular with her!! So blessed!!

Ok. 3:04 in the morning. Mom hasn’t woken me up but I cant sleep. Why do I want to just get out Mom woke me up last night at 3 to ask who was sleeping in the living room. I told her 'no one'. Since she had just woken up the whole house just a lil bit before with the same question. since she remembered my oldest girl, I only ended up with my youngest nieces and nephews sleeping in my bed just so she could get through the night. Oh and the two dogs! Made Posset for Mom today. The recipe is from my Dads side of the family but now she loves it. She does says she remembers drinking it as a child though. That's ok. Its comforting for her. 1 qt milk (or substitute - we use almond milk) 1/2 to 1 c oatmeal Honey to taste Bring to a boil then cook on low for 15 or 30 mins until thickened to your liking. Add fruit or spices like nutmeg, cinnamon and/or ginger. Mom likes it both thin as a tea at first then thicker like a stew. there was a lot of violence in the home growing up so the holidays have never been very pleasant. But now that my mom's condition has deteriorated it's actually more difficult. If I remind her of the holidays, she will want to do the present thing. If she's having a good day she, might be happy but really just a normal day might be best for her. Im trying to make this decision based on her not, my dislike of the holidays. I'm not sure how well I'm separating things since I'm tired. Just venting helps though tonight I took my Mom to my cousins houses to trick or treat instead of to her cousins funeral. I love my uncle but her vascular dementia is getting so much worse and on this brief reprieve, I wanted her to enjoy her 'good day'. I will tell her about her cousin if the time is right but for now, the look on her face was worth any criticism I will receive. So be it!! My Mom has dementia and is having "trust issues." Well so am I. We had a family bday party today with some of the haters. If the party wasn't for my niece, I wouldn't have gone. my generation excluded my Mom for the sake of their mother. Yes, my mothers sister. But a child shouldn't suffer because her grandmother can't accept that her Sister has dementia. So tomorro, I will take my Mom out to get her toes done and we will celebrate my nieces bday just Mom and me. I hate family politics. Grow up Auntie rita! She, My Mother, put clothes on your back in high school so you could have a normal high school Experience. She got you through foster care, rape, and an abusive step mother, and then worked 2 jobs while she was in college to give you what she never had. Fuck you got glasses when she was legally blind. now, that woman, who sacrificed for you, has dementia and you can not handle her going to your grand daughters birthday party.. You should be there for her as she was for you. but you are less than she will ever become. im only ashamed of you Rosita Marie scoones of Seattle washington retired from boeing. You have much to be ashamed of. My Mother Carmen is not one of them.

Ok snow day chores done sit down to change my nail polish and then realize it’s med time for the whole house ! Mom was a dream but wrapping the dog’s pills... thank god there wasn’t a camera on us!!’ Lol

We live in the smokestorm area of Washington state and my Mom already has asbestos in her lungs. Keeping my Mom indoors or masked up while outdoors is frankly awful. There’s notes all over the house, the doors, Windows, door knobs, window latches. Masks at every door. Mom is stage 4 she doesn’t even know why her head hurts.

We caregivers are grieving as our loved ones are being being dismantled by this terrible disease.

I had some that I’ve known since we were kids go to great lengths to tell me that I really needed to get some help in such a way that he was truly thoughtless. His wife is ‘uncomfortable’ with how taking care of my mom has ‘changed me.’ Wow, I have lost friends in this process but I never ever thought it would be him. He was downright cruel. Oh and by the way. Damn straight I need help. And a vacation. And... Im going to take my bubble bath right now. I may not get out until things get better. Finally, after more than a week of horrific air quality levels We are finally back to 'moderate' air quality' add in temps in the 90s and dementia and it's been a tough time. Plus my mom has asbestos in her lungs from working in garment factories in Seattle as a child. Eyeyiyi! Long week. i have also also been driving down to my Dads To help him. he's a Vietnam vet. So we don't know what's all in his lungs. Did I say it was a long weeK. Glad my pop had good black and white movies to cheer us up, thanks to Godfrey!

Hard to say No day. I taught a language class until cancer then my mom started teaching. now all these years later folks are asking for the classes again. But really don't get it about Mom's dementia and my Dad's heart & kidney trouble. Yes, as a caretaker in both houses. I love my language, but my parents come first. Forgive me If I don’t express this well but it’s complicated. my mom is nearing stage 5 dementia and I’m her sole caregiver. We were never close so as she’s slowly loosing herself, I care so much for her, but I’m not loosing a ‘Mom’ like so many of you are. My heart just breaks for you but I also feel grateful. Your posts are helping me understand what I went though as a child as I struggled to understand that she could never be a parent. Somehow you make me feel less alone for back then. As as much as I hate this disease, I just love this group. Thank you all.

My nephew graduated today. It took my Auntie, cousins and my nephew to get Mom here today but she was so happy! She is nearly stage 5, she didn't remember my cousin Cindy but she was great just helped Mom without blinking an eye !!! Mom thanked us for such a good time and slept nearly all the way home! Mom started talking to the minister yesterday. So maybe that's our last church service since he was in the middle of his sermon when she struck up the conversation. Lol Is anyone using anything like an Alexa for their LOs ?? I was given one and dont see any use just for me. but somehow I can’t stop mulling over using one as a reminder system for my Mom around her house like for garbage day. anyone got any insights??

Sharon Smith your post is stunning. I can’t believe so many of us are the sole caretakers of our loved ones!! I'm a sole caretaker for my Mom but I’m not an only child. Are you all in a similar place??? I posted this as a response to another caregiver’s post in this feed. But it made me think about how grateful I am, for all the wisdom and coping skills you all have given me in this group. I know that tomorrow or the next day I will fall apart again, but today I will be able to give my mom what she needs in order to cope with this horrible disease. So much of the strength I have to face this comes from this group. I can’t thank you all for how much you give to all of us.

Here's a pic of me, my mom and my niece when she graduated from college. That cap was the last project my Mom was able to weave on. Today was a tough day. Natalie, one of my favorite teenagers in our community died from an aneurysm. In our community we gather with the family each night until the funeral. I didnt have anyone to stay with Mom so just prayed, got my potluck items and we went. We just stayed in the quiet areas and Mom was great and then just started sundowning. My cousin and his girl friend helped us to get out without much fuss. I see now we should have stayed home. But Natalie was amazing. I just wanted to be there for her sister Aisha, in that sense it was the right call. She and I just hugged so long when we arrived. Our small community has such trouble understanding what has happened to Mom. They want her sweet guidance. She is not the first here to develop dementia but she is still so smart that I really struggle to help them connect to what is happening to her. They are just confused at both of our behaviours. Mom has caretakers for the rest of the week. But thank you all, right now I just need to vent and grieve.

My nieces spent the night last night. They are lovely with my Mom and just kept introducing themselves when she asked. And playing with her. but on the drive back home the 9 year old was upset. She told me that she had asked my Mom who her favorite was and she said “my other daughter”. oops, this isn’t news to me but how to explain it to a lil girl. So tough, particularly since my niece has never even met my sister - Who never comes around and never even visited my Mom when she was well. Ive been used to it for decades but my lil niece keeps thinking it’s unfair. She’s right but this is just what is. Sorry baby girl dementia makes for strange situations. We worked it through with the girls and their other grandparents. But wow tough day both of my parents are still in their homes. I spend one week with my Mom and then the next with my Dad. Today my nephew said “you are a grandmother and you’re still on a parenting plan”. We all just lost it!! Oh my what a night. I'm my moms care giver for the last ten years but it was never meant to be this way. My sister was the golden child. I was the wrecked child. But she messed it all up by perpetuating the family violence we all swore to stop. She beat my poor niece and I stood up to my older sister when I stepped in to protect my niece. Mom didn't notice but decaces later when my sister started harming my mom I stepped back in to protect her too. My my niece is in a better place in her life now. She is lovely, married and has a great lil boy who she will never harm him. But she struggles with her past. Her mom is still a stalwart church woman who did no wrong and now she says I keep her from our mom. On a phone call today my niece opened the door to a sliver of my sisters nonsense. What a hard conversation. But I trusted my niece and just spoke the truth. She is such a good person. But it was still so hard to say truth about her mom. my heart broke so many times for her. whem my niece comes to visit my Mom, I know she will say hard things about my sister that will hurt my nieces feelings. But I'm glad I told her the truth about why my Mom is so resentful. I sure never thought it My 25 yr old niece is coming up to help mom. I'm so greatful for her help but I nearly draw blood biting my tongue. Over and over. my niece has made peace with her mother, my sister, who neglected and abused her as a child. And they have become best friends; so my niece is happy at how much her mother has changed and how giving she is and how she volunteers to help others because she has changed so much. !! While I am so glad for my dear niece. I know my sister hasn't changed one bit. My sister never gives to our Mom and hasn't so much as even called, in years. How giving is that.?!?! My lovely niece can't see that neglect. Volunteering in your community but not driving a few hours to help with your own mom??? Sigh. reciting multiple mantras of peace. Having cup of coffee and ..... Sorry this is so long and looping but I just need to get it it. Thank you for all your prayers and Mom seems ready to go to canoe landing at the tribe down river from us. My tribe doesn't participate but Mom and I do. She taught down there for decades and shes still so smart that some still don't get it that her dementia is pretty tough. I'm certainly not her best help; my chemo fog makes names hazy. Thank god that most don't speak our language so I can give her hints sometimes. .( Wow can't believe I just wrote that after 30 years of language recoverey work)? But at least she gets to go. Im so protective of my cultural life. but my dementia world seems so separate from the rest of my Life. they see her and have relied on her teachings. They love her and want the best for her but just can't seem to see how much of her is gone. This might be such a strange post but I just don't feel so much of the personal loss that so many of you grieve. my grief is for my community. When I see your posts, I never had that connection with my Mom that way, but my community does. I see what they are struggling like you all are in your posts and I just don't know how to help. I just don't have that kind of connection with her. But I helped teach her our language and how to be a teacher. I've lost that myself through cancer and to see that loss in her is ..well that only you know. Has anyone else lost friendships over caring for their loved ones? Omg. Rant coming. My Mom has vas dementia and is in the hospital for the second time in a week with RSV (a very contagious virus) and pneumonia. She is getting treated sufficiently. But each time I take her in i have to remind them to mask up since she has RSV. (I am masked up and sanitizing appropriately). But they will be going to the next room with other patients! How can these professionals expect us to be cautious when they won’t. S I G H Here is my Mom a few years back recovering from her 2nd stroke. Does anyone else’s LO take things apart?? It doesn’t seem to mater what it is she takes it to pieces and distributes them separately. right now I’m looking for the battery cover for her remote that was working before!! Sigh

My Mom, who is advancing In dementia is very prominent in our community. She has been a leader, an adminstraitor, a teacher and a banker and so much more. I struggle with getting my close community to understand her struggle. So this year after much flack i posted this: I just wanted to let everyone know as we enter this holiday season that my mom and I wish you all are best. She has dementia and is not an always herself. But when she is , She knows that she misses her favorite people. As she and I struggle with this terrible disease, we aren't always able to be with the people we love and do the things that have made us the most alive. I know she misses you all and wishes that she could be with you. The best of this holiday season to all of you and your families, all our love. Carmen and Lora Sue Sumner, I know how you feel. This is so hard. Sending you love and light wish I could take you out for a coffee and a hug. my Mom is stage4/5 dementia and is on her 9th caretaker. Non have lasted long. her new caregiver has been here a month (?). So far all is well. I’m so relieved doing this basically on my own has been tough. But it’s wildly harder when I have this time to breathe and I’m having some meltdowns. Yes, I’m seeing my counselor and doing my selfcare. Ok Caregivers, rollcall for the wierd things WE have done: I just made a cup of instant coffee, got a spoon out of the drawer, rinsed it and put it in the dish washer. I took a drink as I was walking away and spilled it since it tasted so bad! Caregiving - it’s always something! Lol So struggling with depression right now. Mom is in stage 4 dementia and is having such a hard time. I am doing what I can to help her and getting the respite help available. But right now I just need to get sone work done it’s my busy season and I have two weaving orders to make for graduations and I just can’t move. We manifest our grief in our caretakering, in this uphill battle with dementia... its one of those days where i have to fight my own demons. mom and i are house and doggie sitting for my cousin. Mom loves it here but I'm the one the having the melt down. I I swear I had done evough laundry and stuff but now we are here she only has one change of clothes??? i find myself saying I wish she had someone competent to help her. Then I pick myself back up. She is so happy here. We are just going to the 2nd hand store. There all better. caretakers, do you feel a bit older than your years? I've been caretaker for my mom who has dementia for 7 years. My dad who lives in another city for 4. My younger cousins (ranging from 6 -12 years younger) are arranging Christmas. frankly I'm more concerned about in home care and a sitter for my mom than whatever my cousins are fluffing over. Christmas feels like a year away..... Venting time!!! Moms having tough days. I finally got her to take a hot bath with some bath oils and it really helped. but its been so been really hard to get much work done since Moms caretaker has been sick. I have another hat to make for a graduation on Thursday (yikes!!!). so hopefully mom will be able to calm down Wow, I’ve been a caretaker for ten years. I cant imagine if I’m still doing this in 2028. Tough day

Mom is on her 9th caregiver. I really like this one. Mom is gaining weight, likes her cooking, is taking showers and her meds and has been happy....until this week. Yup, now that Mom is feeling better she has decided she doesn’t need a caregiver and that she is a waste of $$. Arrrrrrrggg. I hate dementia Today while I was driving Mom freaked out and started hitting me. A song came on the radio and I said, don’t you like this song? ??? ? It distracted her long enough to at least pull over and turn off the car. She was confused. i cranked the radio, pulled her out of the car and said let’s dance. I replayed the song and danced until her rage passed. Today is a mountain screaming day.

Mom had a bad, bad, day today. I’m trying to prep for a class I need to teach this weekend. It’s my income. the rest of my family is ob vacation posting pix of whitewater rafting. I am so not ok. My mom’s behavior is much more like a tweaker than a dementia patient. She has been dismantling items for weeks I find a cord here, a lid here. Now she has taken on the storeroom. It had basic organization before she started now she is taking random items into her bedroom. To the point that she can no longer sleep on her bed. The elders advocate tells me that I just need to Work more. If I keep removing things from her room without her knowledge it will be in her best interest. Several months ago I tried this and it ended up in the most violent behaviors of mom’s dementia. Certainly not interested in that again and I will not be taking the elders advocates advice ever again. But when she can’t sleep on her bed because it is piled so high that I think it will actually topple , she sleeps in the living room and gets mad when anyone wakes her. Oh my

Moms had several really good days in a row but didn't remember my cousin Karla coming by yesterday. Mom started to get upset about it but got really quiet instead. Then she said "Dementia sucks!!

Fireworks day is the worst holiday for dementia bad bad bad night My mom has dementia and has become so upset by the notes around the house, we had to take them down. I tried getting her to write them but no go. Guess I will wait a few days and try to put them up in a different color ink And paper.

Got home from work, hubby mucked up the tv. Been just sitting here all afternoon doing absolutely nothing. Sorry had to vent. He’s eating carbs like there’s no tomorrow. Ugh樂 When does Medicare look back 5 yrs into your finances? Is it at diagnosis or when someone goes into a nursing home? Still waiting on neurologist appt for my husband. It took him an hour and a half to replace toilet seat last night, and it’s on crooked. I’m petrified of these changes I was told to ask a hospital For a petscan if we paid cash, not going thru insurance( since anthem won’t cover one) it would be cheaper. Anyone ever hear of this?????

Went to see a lawyer today about estate planning/ Medicare . My head is reeling! We own a restaurant and rental house. It’s all so complicated! My husband turned in his liscense today How do you take away all credit cards? My husband isn’t at the point where I can without him just calling for another one. Last night my husband got lost driving. He couldn’t follow directions.

Still awaiting my husbands 1st neurology appt ( the 20 th) Do you give your LO anything for a good night sleep? I’ve noticed he’s so much worse when tired

Has anyone else read about the possibility of taking statins bringing on dementia symptoms?????

Has anyone used CBC oil ? Has it made any difference I hear about heavy metals could contribute to Alzheimer’s , aluminum etc. could drinking from aluminum cans contribute? If my husband frigs up the tv one more time! What were the movies on Netflix pertaining to dementia?

Just swallowed my pride and anger to message my husbands brother. When their mother had Alzheimer’s , he couldn’t handle it and left in the middle of the night. He’s seen us once when she passed. I’ve written him Three times now to come see my husband ( his brother) I took one last shot tonight to come visit him . If he doesn’t karma will pay him a visit. He will not get away with being such a selfish jerk.

My husband has another neurologist appt in two weeks. Has anyone just stopped going? All he does is give him the test( draw clock etc) the dr won’t be happy that I stopped giving my husband aricept it did nothing but lower his blood pressure so he’d pass out. Sometimes I think they don’t know much about dementia. I’ve learned more from all of you in these support groups, How many people have gotten another neurologist for their LO? What can a psychologist do for a dementia patient

Got a letter from disability for my husband who has early onset dementia. They have his medical records, reports and a letter from his neurologist. They said they need more. Anyone??? My husband(63) has frontal lobe dementia. We go to his neurologist and dr talks about dementia/ Alzheimer’s . But he never talks about it with me. He doesn’t converse hardly at all. Is this normal? Not talking about it?? Now I’m reading about fvftd so confusing. Will a petscan be able to say exactly what type of dementia they have?? And when they say eating disorders does that mean like eating dinner then a few min later making more food? So how did you or you Lo finally get a diagnosis Well our insurance company denied a pet scan for my husband Has anyone got long term health care insurance before an actual diagnosis? Has anyone wondered if your LO had Lyme disease and. Not dementia??? My husband saw the neurologist today. Needs more extensive bloodwork( test thyroid and B 12 levels) then a pet scan, then EEG. He did mention frontal lobe~ anyone??? Ideas??? MRI showed no dementia. Now what Anyone diagnosed lose their sense of smell ? My husband had his MRI yesterday. Waiting for results My husband hasn’t had a petscan to narrow down what type of dementia he has. I believe he’s had it 2-3 yrs. he doesn’t seem to follow others behavior. He’s extremely passive, very nonverbal. Hard to put complete sentences together. Can make a sandwich or toast , but no cooking at all anymore( he was an executive chef for yrs( and we own a restaurant. He is more than content to literally watch movies ( the same) all waking hours. He will come out of bedroom to eat then back to the bedroom till he goes to sleep. He will start at adult daycare Tues. 5 hour day. I told him he would be a volunteer to help In the kitchen etc. he agrees to anything. His personality is completely different. I’m hoping he doesn’t get angry. Everyone says their lo talks. My husband can’t even put a three word sentence together. He has early onset dementia. It hasn’t even been a yr since diagnosis . He is basically non verbal. He just wants to lay in bed his waking hours and watch tv. For the second time this week, my husband has put clothes in the washer. Then I find him pulling clothes out of the water, wringing them out and putting in the dryer. It seems he’s declining a lot every day, so fast. Anyone else????

Help! My husband is generally good during the day, cooperative, and pleasant ... until sundown that is. But now I am writing about incontinence at night ... at bedtime he goes to sleep with his pull ups on but usually gets up to go to the bathroom 3 to 4 times a night. He often urinates on the floor in front of the toilet and I can deal with that ... but what MAKES ME CRAZY is that he often takes the pull ups off after the first trip to disastrous consequences (urine and feces) on carpet and EVERYWHERE! If I wake up and try to get pull ups on when he's half asleep he gets extremely angry and combative. Two mornings ago I woke up to 9 plops of poop in our light carpet and immediately started working on the impossible job of trying to clean it up. He woke up and said he had to urinate so it was my intention to guide him through the poop plops so he wouldn't have make it worse. Then I noticed poop coming up between his toes so ran to the drawer to grab a sock. As I was trying to put the sock on as a temporary measure, he peed all over me! Better me than the carpet I think ... at least I can have a long shower. He feels terrible and sorry and promises to keep the pull ups on, but, of course doesn't remember. Just woke up and they're off again and he won't put them on. I guess it's because he often slept in the buff throughout his life. Any advice welcome please ... I am at my wits end!!!!

Ohmygoodness ... Yesterday I set up a surveillance system so I could monitor my husband on my phone if I am out. I left for the office at 11:30 AM fully expecting his masseuse to arrive at noon, give him a back massage and make sure he had lunch. About 1:00 PM I received a text message she was sick and not going to show up. About 2:00 PM I turned on the surveillance just in time to see him carry a bowl out of the kitchen and drop it on the Turkish rug in the hallway. I don't know if it was the soup I left or water for our cat. I could see he was very upset and I he spent more than half an hour vacuuming back and forth over the area. When I finally got home after grocery shopping it was 6:45 PM and he was sitting on his rollater outside the door of our condo. We live on the 7th floor and he was locked out! I checked the video clip on my camera and it shows him going out at 5:05 PM ... I feel terrible! I will never leave him alone again

HELP CDB USERS! My husband suffers terribly from sundowners. Many of you have spoken about how much CBD helps. Please let me know the the dosage, if possible. I have tried 1:1 (cbd/thc), 3:1 and 8:1drops plus cookies and chocolates. The drops seem to make him EVEN WORSE! The cookies and chocolates do nothing. HELP! SUNDOWNERS! My husband, who is really sweet in the morning, totally loses it around 3:30 PM. If I am with him, it is mostly delusions and tears. If I am at work (4 afternoons a week) and he is with a caregiver, it becomes threatening and AWFUL. For, example, he locks them out. Many of you have recommended CBD oil ... This seems to get him even more agitated. All advice welcome please.

Has anyone got an answer the problem of severe sundowners? I feel like I have tried everything. CBD OIL gets him even more agitated. My husband is cheerful all day but dusk and nightfall often change him completely. I found many caregivers, even through agencies, are not equipped to handle sundowning episodes.

Hallucinations! Nothing looks right to him... a sweater draped on a chair could be a dog, for example. Then at night he insists we have to go home (We have lived in this condo for 34 years!) ... if I don't make moves to take him "home" he gets upset and accuses me of keeping him here against his will. Someone suggested medication...is that the only way to help him? HAPPYI try to giveGOLDEN him aANNIVERSARY lot of hugs and TO usually THE LOVE it works OF MY ... butLIFE not ❤❤❤ always. Like others he can get angry. He is stage 6, and although he had a meltdown before we went out, and a night of agitation after, we had a PERFECT anniversary dinner. Live Frank Sinatra music, lots of smiles, and great scampi. No one noticed I had to help him eat. I am so happy we got to celebrate our 50 years! "That casual glance was the beginning of a cataclysm of love that still had not ended half a century later" ... A funny story. My husband is physically disabled due to stenosis as well as stage 5/6 dementia. I took a chance over the weekend and we attended (part of) a wedding. l gave the bartender a bottle of non alcoholic wine to pour when I went to get drinks for him so he could feel he was celebrating too. I went up to the bar later and the bartender told me my husband came up on his own so he poured the non alcoholic. I told him that couldn't have been my husband because he couldn't walk that far. We both cracked up laughing! 樂樂樂樂 Has anyone had reverse effects from CBD oil? We give it to my husband at 3:00 PM because he gets sundowners quite badly. Instead of calming him, he seems to go ballistic! Nurse tells me it's because I don't give it to him every day. HELP! My husband has painful bedsores on his bottom. I have been cleaning and treating with Calmoseptine daily but there are more cracks in his skin and they are getting worse. What is the best treatment? I thought I was doing well as a caregiver but clearly have really screwed this up letting it go this far ... Any advice is welcome and really appreciated. Thank you. Mom can barely walk now having a hard time getting her from chair to wheelchair and back again she weighs about 115 I'm 102 it's killing my back beautiful she can't follow my directions what happens now. Bedridden ?

Hi everyone I have a question! I now have some help ( though right now I'm not sure it's helping). How many of you your loved ones respond to a new caretaker with anger saying. " that person can't tell me what to do! And is means and disrespectful to the caretaker it shocks me although I know it shouldn't because once again I comparing the old mom to the Alzheimer's person what do I do ignore it. I don't know if this new help will last if it continues because I have issues with people being rude to other people and conflict. I'm once again exhausted thanks for listening. If the caretaker can't control her behavior and I can't control her behavior then what??? Mom still in bed it’s 2pm can’t get her up she says no and goes back to sleep 樂? Is there a point we're sundowners stops and even though mom is clueless she still try's to go home she can barely stand but she still gets restless between 4:00-8 she's in stage 7 or 8 is on hospice but still won't settle without meds? Any one using xanax. Results?mom is out of control and doesn't know up from down she's not on this planet and I'm having a meltdown (caregiver ever consider sucide)? Not there yet but the thought sometimes sounds better than the hell im living in. Yes I'm glad she's here. But she's not for God sakes we're kinder to our pets when they get to this non existent stage Changed mom's medication to dyplexia (spell?). Any feedback? Anyone's loved ones on Depakote?

Haven't posted for awhile Mom was doing pretty good ghastly a UTI last Thursday she's on antibiotics should be doing better. Last 2 nights not sleeping though the night usually sleeps all night. Found her on the floor this morning she couldn't get up thought she may have broken. but said nothing hurt much. Of course she at the phase where she no longer makes any sense. I believe she's in stage 6. Took her to Dr. Did exray and blood work the exray showed nothing. Now we're going to do a MRI got her a wheel chair and had to use it tonight she's just out of it and can't swallow her pills either. So could this be we're moving into stage 7 where she can't walk or swallow pills she's now sleeping most of the day as well. ???? Not wanting to do this today burnout I want time to my self. I miss my Mom. This person I am taking care of is nothing like her how can the disease be so cruel. I need to take a break and think about the mom that raised me. Because I don't like this other person. Please help me I'm breaking 樂 What do you do when Mom starts hitting biting and throwing herself on the floor. Plus the screaming help me?

So much talk about poop yesterday my LO decided to join in ..he lives in assisted living but we basically do all the caretaking for now ..so yesterday was my sons day and he ran a few errands well he had accident #2 @ pulled it off poo everywhere floor shoes arms and was half naked and walked into hallway looking for help..this makes me so sad knowing how tall and strong he was before this mind robbing disease took over ...I think this is a start of another stage coming on ..樂

Things are changing with my LO 樂 he's having accidents in his underpants this past week... it always happens when hes with my son my shift starts today after work until Wednesday ..hes in assisted living right now but we pay for no care ..think we might have to start now....Reality check

This is Glenn my ex husband he's been diagnosed with Dementia about 4yrs ago..seen so many changes over the years yesterday was the first time he forgot our sons name ..well today was a good day I took a chance and shaved his face for the first time Glenn said " I trust you " lol I think in did a pretty good job 樂 I was talking with my lo the other day he was having difficulty with his sentences understood what he was sayng as he was struggling to say the right words...there was one the he did say Clearly "dont forget me Cindy don't forget me" he said this a few times....makes me feel like he really feels some changes happening now樂 this is so hard my LO has been tranferred to a different medical facility where they can take care of him because he's wanders off and gets lost ...its his 3rd time being moved.. in the past 1 1/2 ... hes never been in trouble with the law ever ...he's in prison.. i feel so helpless...my ex was a good man just a heavy drinker...we always kept in contact with eachother..meds were not working and dr told him to double up on wellbutrin a bipolar medication ...mixed with alcohol ...well landed him in prison for his actions...its just so sad to see this happen to the father of my sons...the facilitly is 6 hrs away each time we get approved they move him...need to get approval again from this new facility...it will be 4 yrs in June that hes been away...he gets out in November this year.. he wanders off gets lost forgets to shower feel his Dementia is rapidly progressing ..can anyone estimate what stage hes in?? I tell my sons we've lost so much time ,its just breaks my heart our lives our memories will all be lost , forgotten to this mind robbing disease 樂

Does anyones lo have Picks disease? And can you please share with me your experience my ex has this

My LO called me today and said this when i answered "Im dying from Dementia im dying" this is so hard to hear him say this ...wondering what brought this on...feeling to express his fears 樂 God help us My LO really loves the movies hasn't been to a theater in years so I'm really thinking about taking him ,they say the seats are so comfortable and the surround sound makes the movie experience realistic..any thoughts or comments greatly appreciated My ex hubby happy to be here with you love ..we're with you on this long journey ..the long goodbye..praying for the Lords strength When I'm having a conversation with my ex husband and he asks me to look for specific picture as I'm looking I forgot the photo then asked Glenn what pic I was searching for?? he said huh what picture!!樂樂 happy he laughed about it too...enjoying the moment I'm so burnt out already I need to sleep..but here at work for my 10hr shift...prayers for my safety please...Dementia sucks..find a cure already樂

I talked to my LO today he has FTD and his speach has really changed alot ..hes a very strong man kept saying he cant wait to hold me in his arms ..i could hear the fear in his voice and he was trying very hard not to cry ..i know hes scared ...im worried ..and hate how this disease robs you of all your memories and well being ...trying to stay positive but this really is hurting ... i just had to vent Thank you for the add...im really having a hard time accepting the reality that my ex husband was diagnosed with Dementia..all our memories as a family being together will all be fogotten...we have 2 sons Another NEW Mom took her depends off went back to bed Can we say Bath day? I knew you could....so now we make sure she still has her depends on when she goes to sleep...will be using the monitor now even when she's awake in her room. Oh the joy. Could have been worse so I found the gift and am grateful. It's a good start when the wakeup and showering is greeted with a smile and a thank you. Living in the moment. Always a good beginning to the day when bath time is filled with laughter. It's all good, just some water....result of someonepulling open the shower curtain during her shower. Aww the joys of Alzheimer's. A good laugh was had by all. Mom has been in a really good frame of mind today, so I took advantage and trimmed her nails. They are wickedly sharp when not trimmed and it's something of a battle when I want to do it. It went very well and she didn't snap at me once. WIN for the home team. Took my mom to get her hair cut today. Shortest it's ever been as far back as I can remember, and she really likes it. She aways wanted her ears covered. Still trying to get her to do more walking, it's like pulling teeth on a chicken...she just can't see a reason, when I tell her it's so she can still walk that we need for her to keep her leg muscles intact....like pushing a rope some days. The battle is real, but a small easy one. Up at just before 2am to get mom to the toilet, back to bed by 2:15...just drifting off to sleep whe mom started calling for help...off to the toilet again just about made it but she was trying to hurry and fumbling with her depends...boy am I thankful for gloves...all cleaned up, a bit of laughing at our antics and she was

It's now 5 am, mom woke up at 4 am soaked, my husband was the one who got her all changed and back to bed, she's now going back to sleep after unleashing her "inner pirate" and chirping like a bird until she had us both up....my husband was trying to let me sleep...not in the cards this morning tho. So now it's coffee, some crocheting while maybe an old movie on TCM....

There just seems to be no rhyme or reason to how wet she will be in the mornings. Same routine, basically same amounts of liquid intake during the day, but absolutely drenched this morning....pads, night dress, sheets...matress cover even.....Landry in and I've gotten her in and out of the shower without any complaints. I call that a win. Have the best day you can everyone. Cheers

Well that could have been really bad, mom decided to try to get out of her lift chair before the foot part was down, so it tipped forward and on the floor she went. Bruises and a bit of torn skin and I'm sure she will be a bit sore. Thank the stars she is basically okay, worried that she had caused some trouble, scared the beegees out of me for sure so for now no foot lift. Usually it is such a chore to get her to leave her chair, tries not to use her walker, today I feel like I just can't win.....but I know better. She'll definitely have a pretty colorful arm for awhile. Just like a toddler you just can't take your eyes off of her. Heads up Teresa Adele Baker Simpson...I may take a well needed break while you are here this weekend.

Oh my stars this could have turned out differently; Mom was at her Walker going to her washroom, decided not to use it, ended up sitting on the floor in front of her toilet. So grateful she didn't fall, she used all the safety bars to sit...not sure why she didn't just sit on the toilet...this all went down in the time it took me to see her getting up with her walker heading for her washroom (so I went to mine) as my husband was going down to check on her....and there she was sitting on the floor. We all got some sleep lastnight also as mom slept from her 12:35 trip to the washroom and back to bed. Wishing all the best day you can have. One of the hardest things to do these days is to sit with my mom while she's eating. Since most of her filters are nonexistent it has become challenging to say the very least. I try to see some humor in the fact that she would have smacked me upside my head if I had done some of the things she is doing. These days she is on a different eating schedule as my husband and I and that's a good thing because it gives me time to want to

After letting her inner pirate out and begrudgingly using the washroom, mom is enjoying her salmon salad sandwich while watching Robert Mitchum on TCM amazed that it's in color.....love her so so much. I wrote this 5 years ago and quite awhile before I was told about this group.... 5 years ago we moved Mumzie up here to live with us, it has been a journey indeed. She and I had some great plans, but as I had learned a long time ago, it's okay to make plans but you can't plan the outcome. Her health is still wonderful, but it's pretty emotionally painful to watch this hateful thing called Alzheimers steal her memories. The hardest is when she is aware of what is happening. The triumphs are the moments of complete clarity and we chat about things. Yes, I would love for things to be different but I am grateful for what I get. I was robbed at 25 of any more time with my father (and there are many who have been without parents even longer), I try hard every day not to grow bitter when piece by piece Mumzie is being taken from us. But alas life is what it is, best to keep in mind that it is also what we choose to make of it. Fast forward....another 4 years have past and now I have all but lost her, I've said this before and it's still true my mom has quality of existence at this point of her life. Our goal every day is to make sure she's as comfortable as she can be, clean, warm, and fed. I so love her smile and it warms my heart when she does. One of our sons and daughters in law are coming up soon and I know it will make her smile and laugh. These are the moments that I cherish now. Life is what it is and for now we live in the moment, one step at a time. Have the best day you can. This morning mom is fairly focused and sharp, knows where she is, who we are, and realizes why she is with us. Happy and grateful to be here. I'll take it for as long as it lasts. ~CHEERS~

Just spent some time reassuring mom that she won't be going anywhere. So tiny and frail and you could see the fear of abandonment in her eyes. Her arthritic knee is bugging her bit from stiffness and the dampness hopefully the tylenol will help her sleep....now that she doesn't remember why it hurts let alone how she wrecked her knee playing softball back in 1973, leads to questions over and over and over again....I have a great deal of empathy for her because I have a rod in one leg, a plate and 8 screws in one arm and the weather we are having right now leads to a lot of aches. I have a pretty high pain threshold and she used to (when she tore the ligaments in that knee, she taped it up with an ace bandage and played 5 more innings and didn't go to the doctor until the next day)....softball was her first love...times like this just break my heart and I have to work a little harder to remember that I am powerless over it all and still feel my emotions without raging at the injustices of this horrible disease. Thanks for listening and being the best group ever. Cheers everyone hang in there. Smiling with a broken heart... We just went in to get my mom up, she was at first confused and frightened, when I told her that this was our house and she lived with us she got a huge smile on her face, started clapping and exclaimed how happy that made her. I so hate this FU@#%&g disease. Well on with the day. Have the best day you can every body. CHEERS Lately in the mornings mom wakes up in a "fog", it takes her a while for the fog to "clear" but she's in a happy mood, So we'll take it. Life on the Alzheimer's merry-go-round. She's only been awake for about 10 to 15 minutes and the fog is lifting. Everyone have the best day you can. Cheers There's been a few additional questions added to her normal list... Have I ever been married? Do I have any other children? Why am I so much older than you? Do you live here?..... Guess it's time to redo the answer sheet.... It's been another good day so far, went to the washroom willingly, she ate lunch without complaining and is now enjoying her snack.... I live for these days. Hope you're all having the best day you can. CHEERS Having my coffee as I listen to my husband gently joke with mom and he reassures her while getting her into her washroom to change from her night things. She's amazed that she's now 93, and that her momma lived to almost 99. She's already looping with her questions but is in a very chipper mood. Here's hoping it lasts. As we all know this journey with our LO isn't always a smooth one so mornings like this one hold some hope. Yesterday she was wonderful all day, then just before bed the switch was flipped for a short time and her inner nasty pirate took over.....then by the time she was ready for bed and in for the night...back to her "new normal" self. More coffee! Have the very best day you can...Cheers.

This morning mom was awake at 5:30, but wanted to watch TV in bed...she was up having breakfast by 8. Really good mood, , had a snooze in her chair, off to the washroom without complaining, ate her lunch without complaining and is now watching MIB II. She likes the worms. These days are wonderful. Cheers everyone and may your day be as graced as ours.

Mom has been really alert today, very interactive with her care giver. So nice to see. The day has started early, 5 A.M. but mom has been made comfortable in her chair, had breakfast and is now snoozing. Me, I'm crocheting a new yummy soft affgan for the couch and enjoying my coffee. CHEERS to all and may you have the best day you can.

Hoping that the chirping and chortleing are a sign of contentment. Her mood seems to be a good one. Today started with a shower and thank you's for caring for me. Just warms my heart. So not looking forward to the "planned" power outage....but since it isn't storming here it will go on as planned. 9pm to 7 am.

This has been a day, the only things I've gotten done were things where I could do them in sports...like laundry and simple baking...having to watch mom like a hawk, her mind is set on not needing her walker and the confusion is not as bad as yesterday, but I don't dare get very far away. Was hoping to get some sewing done but that isn't happening until the husband is home and can keep an eye on her...... While giving mom her breakfast this morning she asked me how long she would be living here. Earlier she had stated that she wanted to go home soon. Will be watching extra closely to make sure she doesn't try another "great escape".... Have the best day you can everyone. So while I was in the washroom this morning mom went for the great escape...surprising how fast she can actually move when she wants to. I found her next door in the neighbors yard. Got her back to the house and into the shower to warm her up good. She's now a bit sore and doesn't know why. All last night before bed she was telling us that "no, your nuts, I haven't lived with you for over 8 years, I'm just here now". "I will be going back to Michigan where my family is". So I guess she warned us that she was going. I am just so grateful that she didn't get hurt other than a few bumps and a scrape on her arm. Her feet are sore because she was barefoot so other than being uncomfortable and not knowing why all is good, door alert is to be installed sooner than later. Funny thing is that if I hadn't been in the washroom she wouldn't have gotten that far so and an alarm would have alerted us. Husband was still sleeping and when I saw that she was out of bed and out of her room I went and looked for her in the rest of the house....then found her outside. Scary to think what could have happened if she had tried to go down the stairs in the front instead of the ramp off of the porch. Mom's new to us electric hospital bed is now in place in her room. It will make things a little easier in the future.

And we have found an electronic hospital bed for my mom....this will be a huge help. Life is changing again...but nothing that I/we haven't been expecting...purchased and installed a motion sensor/video monitor...excellent idea because I actually got some sleep because I knew I would hear mum if she needed me.

The hardest thing for my mom to do is always use her walker, she is convinced that she doesn't need it… Today was an adventure...had to make a 4 hr. round trip today and had to take my mom with me, the repeated questions were "How many miles have we gone? Why are we going? Do any people live here? "(Most of the 2 hour drive from our town to the next is a 2 lane hwy through forested land)....on the upside, she did not get car sick at all, and took only a short hour nap on the way home. Always grateful for days like this. Cheers All. Last night after mom had gone to bed I needed to go and sit and hold her hands until she was asleep. Didn't take long, and you could see her relax and settle in. This is a new phase for her. Mom slept (and is still) through the planned power outage. Power was back on around 6 Mom woke up because of her arthritic knee, some bud rub and back to bed, after a bit she was totally settled and going back to sleep...was nearly asleep myself when a certain someone started snoring because he took off his c-pap.....oh the joy, now it's 3:11am and I'm very awake....at least the cat is not trying to lay on my face now....

A whole night's sleep (well mostly, because I still listen to the monitor) Tucking mom in securely worked. It's going to be a long night, just put her back to bed for the 3rd time and had to put her depends back on her. Time for more crocheting. Got mom back to bed laying down and asleep...but not myself. Getting mom to eat tonight was a challenge, but I have alternatives, yummy chocolate protein shakes...with milk and ice…

I rarely get back to sleep after putting mom back to bed at 2:23 am. She's usually back to sleep by 2:30...I do get some crocheting done and would do some cleaning ( but a cleaning fairy was at my house the other day thanks to P.P.) I have started watching TV in bed after mom is in bed so that if I fall asleep early I'm already there....I've gotten more sleep this week....I may be on to something...about 4 hours this time.

2:28 am up to washroom; 3:40 am back in bed; 3:5ish she back to sleep. Somewhere around 4:35 I was back to sleep. 6 am, chortleing and swearing as loud as she could and just generally being as nasty as she could muster....sent her to the washroom, got her teeth ready for her, went and made her breakfast, and there she was, back to her new normal self....love my mom, but I hate this disease with a fiery passion. I would eat chocolate for breakfast, but I don't have any in the house. It's times like this when I wish I just didn't care about my overall health so I could just gorge myself with comfort food. This being all responsible and stuff sucks, but like all things unpleasant this too shall pass and I will power through. Looking so forward to small goals in our yard, getting caught up on sewing, (had a few special projects in the widths of other things) ....and the best to come is a visit from #3 and wife. Life is good even if I am tired. Have the best day you can. Mom was put back in bed by 11:30/midnight Still sleeping I made it to 6AM A win. Mom was up at 4 again, is changed and back to bed, the dog has been out and is back to her bed, husband is still sleeping...樂樂

Mom woke up at 4 A.M. so off to the washroom, changed depends, nightgown, and bed pad. Back to bed where she chortled fir a bit and then went back to sleep....no sooner did I get back to sleep (where I wasn't aware of sounds) when she started bellowing "hello anybody" around 6 ish....oh well, sleep is over rated...lol...breakfast done, she's content watching an old Doris Day movie (Doris all day on TCM). Have the best day you can everyone.

It's nearly 1A.M. Mom has finally stopped fidgeting with her bedding and is laying quietly...hopeful for some sleep. Sure glad I went to bed early last night...mom woke up at 3am Washroom, depends changed and she's was back to bed and sleeping.

Was really hoping to get back to sleep after tucking mom back in bed at 1amMaybe by 4? I can hope.

And the day begins at 5 A.M. She's back in bed and I'm wide awake. Oh well this is life with Alzheimer's. Mom was awake off and on all night, so I was also...my husband is amazed at how I can function on so little sleep....he has never been a "mom" after raising 4 boys I guess it's still second nature. The off and on sleeping is a 24 hour thing lately. She's awake more in the day still and doesn't attempt to get out of bed at night for which I am very grateful. But because I know she's awake I don't get a deeper sleep....always listening for her. I think I might try napping in the afternoon when she does....just like with my firstborn....Cheers and have the best day you can. I wasn't tired at all, wrote and post this on my personal fb page. Here's hoping that Mom sleeps a bit sounder tonight.

It was a bit of a rough night for Mum last night but today is looking up.

My heartfelt thanks to all of you who took time out of your day to wish my mom a happy birthday. She was impressed by how many. Happy Birthday to my Beautiful Mom who is 93 today. So, part of my "sanity" keeper through this journey with my mom is crocheting. This is what I've been working on since August....it was great because the pattern was ever changing and easy to put down when needed and picked back up whenever. Now I need more yarn...... Last night was day 3 of easing into the CBD oil and a patch for my mum. For the first time in a long time she had a good sleep (and so did we), shower time was cheery and animated....jokes and quips all around...I am hopeful that this will help give her a better quality of life. I love her so much and it breaks my heart when she's dealing with the pain of wreckage of her athletic past. Hoping this isn't just a fluke and it continues for her. Moments of magic are now few and far between. I have determined that with this horrid disease quality of life is fleeting at best. Because my mom is well loved and cared for living with us, she has quality of existence, but I wouldn't call it quality of life any more. In days gone by she had days where she was "off" "cranky" "just being" now those are the norm. She's healthy, and comfortable (as one can be with arthritis and old sports injuries), at the end of the day it's a far cry from quality of life. And as much as I love her and because I truly do, my hope for is that the invisible guy in the sky answers her constant plea to let it be over. Left CC with mom while I cleaned the kitchen up, then got the upstairs vacuumed. Love seeing the smile on her face. Mom watching CC while I clean up the kitchen. Watching Home Alone with mom, she's quite enjoying it. Earlier we watched Men in Black... She laughed a lot then too. Mom working on her colouring.....waiting for her hair to dry..... For me one of the hardest emotions of my mom that I deal with is her expressing her wish to die and just be done with it. Her heath is great, she has aches and pains that come from years of athletic abuse...she started playing softball as a kid back in the 30's and with only a few years of a break played until she was 70...then she took up snowmobiling until she was 75...was still climbing trees to trim them into her 80's...she is now closing in on 93 and on the downward slide of this viscous disease. For the most part she's very easy to care for and her emotional outbursts are few and far between by most accounts. But it is still so hard to hear her swear and rant because of her confusion. I know she is mortified when she wakes up wet in the mornings (you would think that with all the technology out there they could come up with an adult night time diaper). I am trying to make a panty to go over her depends (using the cover material for the baby diapers), hoping that it will stop her nightgown from wicking the urine to her and her bedding. I am aways grateful that because of her memory loss once she's up and we have changed her and bedding she doesn't remember. But it is so sad in the moment. I love my mom so much and she has been one of my best friends since becoming an "adult", even when we Our beautiful mom. In these days of technology one finds it easy to weed out those who really take time for others in their busy lives... What do I mean you might be asking? Well over time where mom is concerned, it's not escaped me that there are many who in the past years have clicked "like" or left comments on memes or pictures on my page, but it doesn't go beyond that.There are folks who barely know her or only know her through us who inquire about her more that so called family. Talk is cheap, thoughts and prayers cost nothing. We all have busy lives and trust me I do understand on the whole, but over the years I've learned to take words with a grain of salt, it's actions that speak loud and clear. This is not a judgement, just stating fact. There are those who can't be here physically, but I hear from them personally and a few of mom's friends who inquire about her pretty regularly, one who was able even came from Colorado to see us. Also I know that it goes both ways, and I try and this is why I'm still on fb, I'm not able to get away from the house unless John is home or home care is here, mom can't be alone at all any more for her safety. So if you have people in your life who you or someone else is carring for reach out/don't forget them, because they like myself will write you off and most likely won't "write" you back in when it's over.

I am sitting here smiling while I listen to the playful banter between my mom and my husband as he helps her get ready for her day. I am so grateful for him and everything he does to help me with her. Family means everything to him as he himself lost both his parents within 6 months of each other when he was 12 and a half and 13....truly what and how a real man should be. Love them both so much. Just got a call from home support and they will be starting home visits on the 1st. 2 hours twice a week to start with.

Today was a big day for mom. 3 of our sons are here,2 with their wives and our grandson. Our youngest's is here by himself as his lady is in Australia (where he will be heading in the new year.....loud and boisterous, but she was loving it. She was thrilled when they all made sure to say good night after she went to bed and before they went out to visit with their friends from school for a bit. Tomorrow our oldest arrives with his fiance. New memories being made in our new house (just rebuilt after the fire 2 years ago).....so grateful it's been such a good day for mom. Cheers Had a wonderful meeting with the coordinator for home support today. Recieved the call from the intake nurse today, we now wait for the meet and greet for a case worker for respite visits. Ease mom into having someone besides us helping out with her. Should happen in the next 2 weeks. Looking forward because I will be able to figure out when I will work out of our house and not have to take mom into town with us ever day we are at the shop. Now that the house has been rebuilt and we are pretty much settled in some of the stress has eased. Hope everyone has the best day you can. Cheers The struggle is real. The journey is hard. The memories of who she was is what gets me through days like today. I could do very little that was "right". I love her so much and hate Alzheimer's with a fiery passion, I am so grateful for the tools I learned in all my years in Al-Anon because they get me through and keep me sane most days, knowledge and science set me free from the false sense of security of "pie in the sky when you die".....so I rely on common respect and empathy for the loving woman who raised me, who taught me that loving and giving love is what life is about. This journey with her is so very frustrating at the best of times and totally devastating at the worst of times. My husband and I have a wedding to go to this weekend, we have a wonderful young lady who will be coming to look after her. It's been 19 months since we've had a real break and time away together. We will only be a few hours away, but it's still going to be an emotionally restful 2 and a half days. And all 4 of our sons (and respective wives & fiancee)will be there also...so looking forward to it. I feel better already just putting it out there. I am so grateful for this group may you all find comfort and peace. CHEERS

Dr.s appointment this morning and of course it's overcast and nasty just like how I feel...she's good but husband and I have chest colds....but we shall all survive this I am sure, but today I would just love to stay in bed. Okay putting on my big girl panties and taking on the day...... cheers all....have the best day you can. Not sure what is happening here, my mother has always gotten car sick as far back as l can remember and it had been getting worse in the past few years....she either drove or had to be at the very least in the front seat...yesterday evening she asked to go for the drive out to the property to tend to our critters and I had her sit in the backseat because there's a hand grip to help her get in....not one word about feeling sick, no "heaving" sounds, (forced or otherwise). I'm going to see where this goes, as it was so much easier for her to get in and out of our Edge.

Now that mom is settled again, I'm going to try to get some more sleep Alzheimer's is such a horrible disease...I daily remind myself that it's the disease not my mom who is the problem. Have the best day you can everyone. ~Cheers~ There always seems to be a few really good nights where we all sleep. Then there are ones like this one where it's up and down every few hours. Tonight has been a doozie yelled at me, screamed that I was a fucking son of a bitch and had no right to ask her to go back to bed. Told me she would throw me out of the house. That's when I started laughing, she reverted back to her more normal self and asked why I was laughing, I told her she lives with me and my husband in our house. She now wants to see the deed to prove it. I got her all settled and put her TV on TCM (old Glenn Ford movie) for her to focus on....I've been watching her on the monitor and she's quiet and calm....so I'm going to try to go back to sleep. Sure glad I went to bed at 9:30 lastnight. Just went in to get mom to the washroom before her lunch, she told me I was stupid for thinking she needed to use the washroom as she had just gone.....well mom, I would like you to try anyway....you don't Yesterday was a real rollercoaster of thoughts for mom. Not just her "normal" always asked questions. She was very focused on Michigan where she grew up and left over 72 years ago when she went into the Air Force. This new phase is going to be a definite challenge. We try to give the simplest of "generic" answers....like "everyone who needs to know wher you are does"....last night she was focused on her parents and were we sure they knew where she was.....and she was definitely a bit frightened. Because our house was just recently built after our house fire and there are really no familiar "nick nacks" or personal things so she was confused because she doesn't remember being here. Then she wanted to know why we didn't spend more time together....(I spent most of my day with her when she was awake)...wanted to know how long she would be visiting us and when she was going home....she has lived with us for over 8 years, but no longer remembers it. She now seems to have forgotten the years between growing up and now. She finds it "interesting that she was married, has children, yet she knows me, and asks about when my sons come to visit....our 3rd son and his wife will be here this weekend....at around 1:30 am I went and played her back in her bed because she was half asleep sitting on the edge of her bed....she has been waking up and stirring for almost an hour now... Probably sounds bad but at least I have had my first cup of coffee in relative peace and will be ready to face the day....no one for my 2 hours of respite...but while my husband is home I will go into town and do some There are times when screaming in my head is not enough. But alas at times it is all I have. Dinner time is just emotionally painful sometimes. Hard not to react to the attention seeking behavior. But I am strong. Been a pretty good day, but Princess resentful is getting in touch with her inner nasty pirate... The nerve of me to suggest she use the washroom. Swearing and cursing me as she uses the toilet. Me, well I'm sitting just outside her room waiting for her to be done, and by then this should have passed...... oh the Joy's of this horrible disease. NOT!!! So, my husband took care of my mom all weekend so that I could go down to our second son and his wife's house for our grandson's 2nd birthday. 2 of our other 3 sons were there also, it was a nice break for me,and I just got home after a 4 hour drive to have my mom start snarling and snapping at me when I asked her to go use the washroom. Filled the room blue.....I know nothing and was stupid to think I knew what I was talking about...yeah, her depends was full and she started peeing as soon as she sat on the toilet. 樂 ♀樂樂 ♀樂樂 ♀樂樂 ♀樂樂 ♀樂So, my husband took care of my mom all weekend so that I could go down to our second son and his wife's house for our grandson's 2nd birthday. 2 of our other 3 sons were there also, it was a nice break for me,and I just got home after a 4 hour drive to have my mom start snarling and snapping at me when I asked her to go use the washroom. Filled the room blue.....I know nothing and was stupid to think I knew what I was talking about...yeah, her depends was full and she started peeing as soon as she sat on the toilet. 樂 ♀樂樂 ♀樂樂 ♀樂樂 ♀樂樂 ♀樂 But what do I know? Then she got mad at me because I laughed when she called me a dumb ass and told her no, I'm a smart ass.... It's sure fun to be told how stupid you are because you've asked her to use the washroom... Oh the joy. Today is going to be a "wait and see" kind of day. It was a struggle to get her on her feet and to the toilet this morning, almost like she forgot how to stand. But whe she got mad at me she seemed to remember ( whatever works I guess). Washed, dressed, and having her breakfast...... now for my CoFfEe...... Cheers and everybody have the best day you can. So most of the day she was sweet as usual, then just like that she became the Tiny Toothless T-Rex ( fondly referred to as 3TR....) All because she was asked to please go use the washroom before dinner. Why the F*ing hell don't you just get a gun and shoot me?, You just want me for my money (what money ?) It was so very hard not to buy into it, Ive been up for a couple of days getting little or no sleep hand feeding and trying to save our new born lamb (that didn't make it), and have been re-making a wedding dress from an older one, (which is fun for me, but we had a few glitches and thank my stars it all came together) Normally I find it very easy to just chant in my head "let it go" "this to shall pass", but boy what a battle it was between my ears, I just about said "sorry mom but I love you but I'm 1. not willing to go to jail for your whim, and 2. I'm not about to make that big a mess in my own house that I would have to clean up and 3. Hopefully by the time you come out of the washroom your attitude will have changed back.....Happy to say, it did....all grateful and happy. Now she is sitting and coloring and quite happy. I am so grateful for this site as it does help to be able to just tell it like it is without fear of judgement... CHEERS I keep encouraging mum to walk as much as possible to keep muscle tone, some days it's a battle, today is one of those days.

Oh my, someone is being quite cranky. It must be so hard to be trapped by knowing what you probably feel you should know and not be able to express it or form the thoughts. We had visitors for a few days and attitude has gotten worse each day, and now it's different again. I am sure this will change yet again in a short amount of time. It's heart breaking to watch, but I know that the biggest part of this is this horrid disease and not the "real" her. Still tough to maintain the appearance of calm when your natural feeling is to speak to the nasty treatment that you don't deserve in any way. I love my mom so much and it crushes me that she slips away more and more each day. Have the best rest of your day that you can. Life on it's own terms really sucks most of the time.... Being an adult and not running from all the ups and downs can be so overwhelming at best.....other times I just shake my head and wonder why. Then the moment has passed and I think about the little things that do make it bearable in the tougher moments. Striking out and hurting those around us usually those who love us most seems to be a very basic instinct....living with someone who really doesn't have filters anymore has shown me this.... Confusion leads to frustration and it can sometimes lead to emotional outbursts...when we still have filters hopefully we use them, because we can remember what we said and did....but for someone with Alzheimer's the memory is gone so there thankfully isn't any shame or guilt for them to deal with. And it is up to us to try to remember that the outbursts aren't really directed at us,it just seems to be. I have been a grateful member of Al-Anon for over 25 years now and I have used the "tools" more with this awful disease in the past few years than I ever needed to when dealing with folks who needed a 12 step program. (And that includes raising 4 teenage boys to adulthood ). I do not blame all this on Satan or God because I believe it is just a horrible disease that scientists just haven't found how to fix yet. I try to take each step forward the best way I can,I except that I am in charge of how I feel not others, I alone choose how I "react" or "act" in any given situation, be it in the regular My mother is beginning not to eat enough. She is given vitamins but appetite not good. My mother is still very mobile and becoming very stubborn. She hasn't had any falls but she seems to stumble a little every now and then. Want to eat sweets and drink soda, although we don't give it to her all the time just sometime. We keep cranberry and crangrape around.

My mother is always asking about my grandmother who died in 1965. I just hate this illness.

Does anyone know why they say they are scared? My mother always says she's scared. I ask her scared of what and she doesn't kmow. She want my granddaughters to come over because one of them will sleep with her at night..She'll wake up 4 or 5 in the morning and tell me "Sharon if somebody don't come help us we gone burn up in here". Just different things. My sister and I are so frustrated listening to our mother with the negative comments. She was negative before she became ill and she is still negative.

This is for those who have never dealt with dementia. When I learned about it years ago, I was told they are no longer with us. Their world is entirely different now. They don't see what we see and my mother couldn't find a cabinet knob yesterday. I told her to look to the left she stood there. May I add she was Valedictorian of her class and a whiz in math. They see people that we don't see. Sad to say but that is their reality. By the way did you guys know you can look up a nursing home rating for staff and facility at: medicare.gov and there is also a Nursing home checklist. I just wanted to share that my mother have sent to a great facility in Dallas. It is Villages of Dallas and they take care of her. Yesss I don't worry anymore. Her hair gets combed, it's not pissy smelling and the residents are not in each other rooms. She had a very bad UTI that the other place ignored and almost took her out. An old friend was on her way to see her dad today and saw see me getting ready to leave the house and she shared a story with me that her husband is going through the same thing dementia with his mom. She also said that her in-laws explain to him because he is married that he should not feel guilty by putting his mom in a facility because she have lived her life and it would not be worth it to lose his family trying to take care of his mom when he is having a very hard time doing it. So they did make the decision to put her in a facility and it's an all-female area of the facility because at different locations that men try to touch the women. Which happens at some locations and I am going to pray and think seriously about this because she doesn't want to bathe and uses it anywhere. Have you guys noticed that when a loved one has an illness such as dementia the people that do not want to help immediately suggest putting them in a nursing home and the thieves in the family come out? Just sayin. Do you guys think it should be against the law for elderly people to sign papers for a Reverse Mortgage without showing proof they are mentally capable and proof from a physician that they truly understand what they are doing AND consult with that person's children first? Just saying because they are literally being taken advantage of. My mother doesn't remember signing papers. She's basically given the home away.

Good morning a co-worker of mine mother is having symptoms of dementia. She refused the chemical made meds for her mother. She told me to go to the store and buy some melatonin, so I went to Walmart and purchased a bottle. Lo and behold my mother slept all night, was not at my door pecking on it at 4:00 a.m. got up in the middle of the night and changed her own depend and went back to bed and slept all night. I can see the difference already, I only had to tell her once what to do and it is a relief already. This is a natural drug our bodies make so it will not harm them. She's not all the way back but this is wonderful. My mother have been ready for church since 1:00 a.m. this morning. Does anyone think stress can bring on dementia? Well it's a new day and when Betty doesn't get her way she says we are talking about her and start the crying and refuse to take her meds. What's a caregiver to do? She won't eat either just went in the room and closed the door. I've been reading a lot of comments where LO had issues with kidneys or liver, etc. My mother had a kidney issue and she had mini strokes, I wonder if that would have caused it..also when my father passed in 2004 that was stressful...hmmm just wondering. Has anyone given their LO Pravasin? I think that's how you spell it. Isn't it strange how so many people have this disease nowadays? What is really going on? Unfortunately our mother passed out yesterday morning. Called the paramedics, they took vital signs which were good. Appeared to be passing out a 2nd time in the evening. We took her to the hospital and we're going to have her admitted to a facility afterwards. It's been so hard on us. It's four of us but only two help out. I pray we get through this. I had my mother to bounce the ball to me. We were going back and forth. You can't see the ball good but I Goodthought morning it was goodguys mytherapy. mother had to be rushed to the hospital yesterday. She is only breathing 6 times per minute on her own but they do have her on the machine. They said they will test her again to see if she is able to breathe on her own. Please keep her in prayers but I know God's will must be done. Ok so as of Friday evening, I have decided to pull my mom out of the nursing home. When I walked into the dining room when she was eating, her face was laying in her plate. Not that many people are in the small dining room and when they saw that I pulled my mom's face about her plate they ran over trying to pretend My mother have started seeing her mom and dad who have been deceased for a while, also she is saying she see people in the hallway that are coming to get her. I have heard this some people too close to the end. I hate this stupid illness. I have a question, I don't normally look up and read what the stages of dementia are. For some reason I had to take my mother to the doctor today and I was telling the nurse that all she wants to do is sleep, so the nurse said to let her sleep but I explained that we have to send her to daycare because she cannot be left alone. So if someone know the answer to why she likes to sleep sleep sleep please give me an answer if you know it and what stage that might be in. She seems to be getting weak and stumbling a lot also and I'm afraid she's going to fall and break her hip or something.

For the people that are uplifting I truly appreciate the answers and referrals. I do realize though when one open up to the public venting, there are those that are being sarcastic. If you can't lift a person up don't answer. There is a breaking point for everyone some can take more than others and I happen to be the one that take a lot. We all get frustrated and tired. Have a great day.

I AM VENTING....I am so tired, everyday I come home it's the tears and the neighbors are sending their kids to throw trash in her yard or I want to go to a ladies house and get some of those things to keep my face clean,etc. Sometimes I just want to bypass the damn house and drive to the other side of the country. I have a dementia hot line to call but I just want to scream and run. I am so freaking tired of this crap.

Really embarrassed and can’t seem to let it go. As a care giver I work from home, cant’ go anywhere when my husband gets back from daycare, as one with dementia we don’t have any insightful/fulfilling conversations. When the healthcare worker came over for the 3.5 hours I went to the farmers market. I saw someone I barely know but I just kept talking and would not shut up. Her husband kept looking at his phone to you know give that clue they were done talking. I just could not shut up and I know its because I don’t have any human interaction and stuck inside with my husband. I am so embarrassed and can’t get it out of my mind. I don’t think people understand what this is doing to me. I have no friends or family out here either, it is not the first time I have done that. I am in such a loveless marriage because of this disease. My husband is so mean and unloving. I know it is the disease. I want to cry to get it out but I am so angry and defeated. My dad was so mean to me growino up and now my husband is. I know it is not all about me, I think I am having one of those days where I feel sorry for myself....it will pass.

My husband suddenly seemed like he did not have dementia and showed no signs for weeks. I did not know what to make of that. Then, last night he went back to his normal ways of dementia. Anyone know why someone would do this? I find it very odd and disappointing as I thought maybe the disease reversed itself. Do not know if that is even possible but things were good for a few weeks.

My husband kept asking me the same question every ~15 minutes, I thought finally it would stop then he calls me on the phone while inside the apartment to ask the question. I give him credit for making me laugh. I bought this braclet to wear as my husband fights this disease so he is always with me, it is my way of honoring him. He got mad at me for buying it and said some not so nice things. If someone did this on behalf of me if I had an illness I would think it is so nice. I have never had anyone love me the way I have showed my love for him. My question has always been how fast will the disease take my husband where I will need to put him in a home (I don’t want to) and I realize not definitive answer. However, I was told he is in between stage 5 - 6. He was not showing any additional signs of things changing for awhile but now the Kerug Coffee Machine is confusing to him, he is so fixated on things and gets nervous or panicky. For example, he had diarrhea yesterday and all morning before I took him to Adult Day Care and on the way he was so worried he would not be near a bathroom if he had it again. He got to Day Care and afraid to drink coffee Incase he got it. This is one example. Is he slipping into another phase? He’s also more depressed.

I was told by my husbands doctor that he is between stage 5 and 6 and told me he has progressed quickly since first seeing him 1 year ago. I know there is not a definitive answer for this but any insight would be great! Would you say within the year most likely he would be so out of it he might need to go to a home. I have been told by 2 doctors, family, and a couple of people from a support group it might be time to put in him a home because I am so overwhelmed and I need to take care of me to take care of him. I *hate* that suggestion, makes me so sad. I feel he is not ready but I want to be prepared. I kept telling the doctor “Don’t take him away from me”. I am overwhelmed, depressed, exhausted (like all other caregivers).

Not sure what to do. My husband’s son lives 4 hours away and we were planning to go next Friday and Saturday (he knows that he is going) and my husband would not be in Adult Day Care for those 2 days. For the past week he has been saying he wants to live with his son and yesterday told the Adult Day Care that he is going to move there. When my husband does not go to the Adult Day Care he gets nervous/agitated that he is missing “work” and he is going to get fired. I get the impression that they could care less if we came up or not. Based on that, do you think he is overwhelmed by the thought of going or it would be too much to go to take him out of his surroundings/routine? Normally he does not say he is moving there but now he is saying it. He now is also saying I don’t love him or our marriage is not good. Not sure what to do.

I got these cards made to hopefully to help with certain situations. I made other cards so he thinks they are his business cards for work (he goes to Adult Daycare) and I have on the back his “work hours” and on the front pictures of each of our dogs so he can look at them.

My husband is really become depressed more. His doctor increased his depression meds but my husband says he contemplates suicide. I try to cheer him up and he talks about how bad our marriage is. He says that a lot. Do you think he always felt that way and now with the Dementia it is coming out? He was so confused last night thinking I was on Dancing With The Stars and really upset at me. I just wonder (need closure) if he always thought our marriage was bad. We will be married 10 years this June. He had 5 wives before me and I have been married to him the longest so not sure. I just feel hated by him.

I received an extra 4 hours of assistance so now I can have Sundays for 8 hours to myself which is SO needed. My husband is having a hard time dealing with me away that long. I had to cut it short yesterday to come back. He was so out of control with the health care worker, the only way to calm him down was for me to come back to ease him mind then go back out again but that will to work each Sunday. I work full time so this Sunday is so needed and I need to find a way to make it work. The Serequil and the TCH is not working anymore on him to calm him down. Any suggestions? My husbands doctor never said what stage he is in. How long do you stay in a particular stage. I realize probably everyone is different but on an average.

It’s hard to take care of someone with Dementia when you don’t want to go on yourself. So tired of living in this sadness and watching my husband suffer and last night he said he wanted to throw himself over the balcony and asking me where the gun is. We don’t have a gun. I went the gym tonight thinking I would feel better since the healthcare worker came over and on the treadmill I just wish it would end. Can’t get out of this funk as I have to take care of my husband. Just want to vent, thank you! I’ve been crying and having severe anxiety all weekend. My husband is confused or angry. I feel like my freedom is taken away (I feel selfish thinking that way but it is how I feel). I hate watching him with this disease. I am 48 and he is 70 and I tell myself I will never marry again, I can’t go through this again, so painful. I try to give him the best life possible. When people ask how old my husband is I say 60 as I can not take the ridicule of our age difference but I feel like I am not being true to him when I try to avoid the ridicule. I just can’t take anymore, I am already a mess. I love him and want to protect him from the disease and kills me that I can not.

I know this feeling I have I will regret when the time comes when my husband needs to go to full time care but I can’t get rid of the feeling. I would never divorce or leave him but I don’t want to be married anymore. I just exist each day to take care of him. I can not seem to appreciate the 7 hours I am able to leave him a week as a healthcare worker comes in. I looked at him last night when he was sleeping and he used to hug me at night in bed and tell me he loved me and I was his little trincket. Those days are gone. Yesterday I thought that it would be a good day to kill myself. I would never do that either as I would not leave him and my dogs as they need me, I just wish I could fall asleep and not wake up. I am so tired of struggling. My husband is not at the point of going into a facility/home yet but his son (his biological son) would like him to live in a facilaity/home where he lives which is 2-3 hours away. I want my husband to be near me so I can visit him daily if he went into a home. I could not afford to make a weekly trip that far away, rent a hotel, and house the dogs. Because I am not the biological mother what rights or moral rights to do I have to keep my husband near me? I could not function if my husband was far from me. Not sure how to handle this.

My husband is on week 2 of Adult Day Care and he has been doing amazing. When I drop him off it is hard to say good bye as in a weird way I want to spend the day there. He can’t wait to go everyday. It does look fun and people are so loving there. He is having more fun than me during the day. I am happy for him but kind of jealous. I think because everyone there is so kind and they are dealing with the same struggles and there is support. For me I have to be with the rest of the world where people could care less. Just thought this was a strange realization I came to.

My husband and I toured the Adult Day Care that he is going to go to. We are referring to it as “The Silver Fox Club”. Two women could not stop smiling at him there, I didn’t have the heart to tell them he is my husband. He seems acceptable to going but I know it is going to be hard dropping him off the first day. I am learning as the care giver going through this journey that it is just hearbreaking. I am trying to take something positive from this by taking more of an initiative when I know others are not feeling better to let them know I am thinking of them. I am trying not to let the acts of others not showing any love/concern/empathy for my husbnd affected with this disease or for me being the care giver not to overtake me, it is hard as it hurts but I am trying. We just got approved for Medicare to asssist with the cost of Adult Day Care. Does anyone have good advice for picking out one? Any lessons learned that you wish you would of done? We are going to go tour some but checking to see if anyone learned anything after the fact of picking out an Adult Day Care. BTW—> I hate that name they use, I told my husband that we are going to pick out a school. Just to vent....why would they call it Adult Day Care? Today is the day that I know my husband needs more help than I can give him. I am going to call Medicaid tomorrow to sign him up for benefits, or whatever you call it. I am so sick to my stomach right now, I feel so numb too. Today is a sad day, I don’t know how he is going to react to outside help, he gets angry when doctors are mentioned. I‘m so sad, its like I dont’ have my husband anymore but he is here.

Has anyone started a Go Fund Me Page to gift the facility that your loved one is at a modest gift and if so any insight into what makes a good post? I made a page and was looking for $350 and noted that a gift card to Target, Amazon, or Toys R Us would work in lieu of money. I also noted I would show proof of items purchased. I communicated that I wanted to gift the facility brain games like 300 piece puzzles, dominos, color books, etc. I saw that 49 people viewed my post but no donations. I see others who have asked for thousands and got donations. I don’t want to “Tweet” or post to FaceBook as I don’t want to solicite money from people I know. I want people to give because they want to. Any suggestions? Any helpful advise from lessons learned for signing up my husband for Medicaid to help pay for his care? I do work full time and we live pay check to paycheck including his social security he receives and we have no assets and owe more in debt than we have in savings. He is not a vet. I just want to know what to expect and what I can be proactive on. Also, with care coming in should I get a camera that videos what goes on during the day?

Thank you everyone for the security camera options. I want to hide one in the apartment but appears this is not an option as you can tell that it is a security camera. Has anyone just left them out in the open so the worker knows they are being filmed? If I got a bad homecare worker then they would just take him into a room where there is no camera like the bathroom if they were going to mistreat him or my little dogs. What is your thought how to do this. I want to make sure my husband and dogs are ok.

Any recommendations for Monitors that are hidden inside the apartment. It would be nice to see what is going on in realtime. My husband will have home healthcare and I want to be able to see what is going on.

Today is the first day that my husband was going to leave the house (which I was afraid was going to happen one day) he was confused and said he was going home. I now know I can not leave him home alone. I did buy him a medical bracelet noting he has dementia and my contact info. He can still function in other ways but so confused and forgetful so not sure at what point can I get someone to come in and help me for a few hours so I can leave the house. Any direction someone can give me on next steps?

Are people numb? Taking my husband shoe shopping is to overwhelming for him because of having to make a decision so I bought 9 pairs from different stores and now starting to take them back for the ones that do not fit him right. I don’t tell everyone my husband has dementia but they kind of gave me attitude returning the items so I explained why I was shopping this way. Not that I am looking for sympathy but when you get not even a hint of compassion it makes me think how people just must be numb inside. Same thing happened at the XFinity Mobile store when I would not get my husband a smartphone and I explained why he can not have a Smartphone as it would frustrate him to use and would set off a situation the guy rolled his eyes at me. We live in a cruel void of human kindness overall. Very sad

My husband is so agitated he just sits there with a mad look on his face and is not sleeping, is up at 3 AM and wanting to go to what he thinks is work. I gave him another Serequil at night but it is not keeping him asleep. The doctor does not want him to go on anymore pills to “drug him”. I purchased a door/motion sensor so I can hear if he tries to open the door. At lunch I bought him the attached to maybe calm him down but I did not realize how expensive it is, I can’t buy a new pack of Canahis CBD gummies every week. I am hoping the Cannabis CBD lotion will work on him, I have never used this before. Has anyone used it on their loved one? Anything I should be aware of? Enduring means more than simply putting up with trials or adversity. Endurance involves our mind and heart, or the way we react to hardships. A person who endures manifests courage, steadfastness, and patience. Endurance is “the spirit which can bear things, not simply with resignation, but with blazing hope,” “It is the quality which keeps a man on his feet with his face to the wind. It is the virtue which can transmute the hardest trial into glory beyond the pain.

My husband has taken 3 doses (over 1.5 days) of a new prescription Divaloproex (12G MG). To him he says it is making him more irritable is it too soon to tell. Also, he was irritable before he took it. The doctor gave it to him to slow down his racing thoughts. Anyone have experience with this medicine, do you think I should give it some time, he just got if from the doctor this past Friday. I have a home healthcare worker come in twice a week, 4 hours each time. My husband gets upset when I leave and I came back early tonight as it bothered me but then I did not get my errands done. I don’t know what he is thinking, is there a way to make the person feel ok with leaving the house? I am only gone 4 hours twice a week.

Curious what people do at home for exercise when you are in the care giver and can’t leave your loved one alone. I was thinking of getting the small trampoline but not sure if it will get boring. I will have to excessive in the garage (its attached to our apartment) so its going to be cold out there right now but can be done.

So I text my husbands sons wife and told her I need one week of every 6 months and they are going to have to look as a family for someone to stay with him and take him to daycare or pay for hired help that week as I can not afford it. I want to see my family which is out of state. Now that I said what I want and if they do not comply should I just drop it as so far I have not received any help and it has been close to 2 years. I am riddles with anxiety and do not want to take on any more stress. I made my wished known. What do you think? I have never asked or anything financially from them (they are not my children) I am just asking for help or for them to pay for help twice a year.

My immediate family does not reach out to me much anymore to see how I am doing. I think they got sick of my texts (I wasn’t sending a lot) as it was probably depressing for them but they are the only ones I have left to communicate to. Has anyone had family back off from them? I am in tears and hurt and angry. My husband says his children care for him (they barely call and have not come and visited him except once for one of them for a few hours) and he says deep down I care for him but I am taking advantage of him. I am the one that takes care of him 24/7. I have no friends or family here in OR where we moved to. We moved here in part so he could be near his kids. When he has his breakdowns I am the one to rub his back and comfort him, when I breakdown I have to do it in private by myself. I feel so trapped.

My husband is at the very beginning stage of Alzheimer’s. I am able to work from home so I can be with him but my job is so unfulffling and I feel so isolated not working in an office around/with other people. I want to look for something else but feel guilty. I feel so isolated and alone. Not sure if I should just stay where I am at so I know he has someone here with him. The only thing he needs help with is his medicine other than that he can function on his own. But there will be a time when he will need me all day but having a job where you can work from home all day is not typical where I am at. My husband has dementia and he has to be in Adult Day care so I can go to work and I have to be with him in the evenings at all times. I just found out that he now has minimal emphazima(sp) and minimal clogged arteries. I did not tell him as it will cause more anger and relentless questions. I don’t know the plan yet from the doctors. I’m just not sure what disease will take him first. I drank again to cope, so upset with myself. Between the guilt and now having additional medical issues how much more is there to deal with? My sister did not respond when I told her about him so I need to vent here to get it out of my system. Thanks for listening. Does anyone know what it means when you see lights flashing or going around your head? My husband woke up like this and I am not sure if this is something I should go to emergency for?

My husband is sitting here talking to me (Charlene) not realizing that I am Charlene, his wife. He is telling me all about Charlene. Earlier he thought I was calling to have him taken away. I guess I will find out what he really thinks of me. It’s weird being married but your not the spouse anymore.

I am having such anxiety and can’t get anxiety medicine from doctor. I cant go to the non ermergency doctor as I don’t have the time because I have to look after my husband. What else can I do to get help? Mindful meditation is not working. I know I need anxiety medicine as I am at my breaking point.

Been crying all morning. My husband is so confused with this disease. I have been trying to not wallow in pity so I have been googling funny and happy things on the internet that has made me laugh then I start crying. I have no friends here when I moved away to another state so he could be close to his family and he barely sees them. I can’t leave the house unless he is at Adult Day Care but then I have to work. I wish his family would be more involved, how can you not help out your dad and brother. My dad was abusive to me and wont’ speak to me or any of my brothers and sisters but if he got his disease I would take care of him. I am so lost, angry, sad. I had a major breakdown in front of my husbands son and it did not help I had a few glasses of wine, I was just so stressed and wanted relief so I had more wine. Most of me if disgusted at myself for doing that but the wine numbed me but then I had a melt down. A total meltdown. I don’t want to turn to wine or food to cope. Embarrassed and mad at myself.

I am curious what inner strength or something you learned through this journey of caring for a loved one about yourself. It’s 4 AM and he’s starting already, yesterday was a bad day, all day. I think so far I am holding my emotions in better than before but I still keep texting my mom about the situation which I never wanted to be that person who seemed to complain all the time.

I was driving today listening to an upbeat Podcast and the people on the Podcast were lauphing. It dawned on me....I don’t know when the last time I had a really good laugh, my days are so focused on dealing with my LO. I want to laugh. When is the last time you laughed really hard, what was it about? I am new dealing with my husbands memory issues and the results. Last week was a particular hard morning but I told myself I need to get out for at least 30 minutes. I went to a public place and for some reason just broke down crying. I was so embarrassed, I could not move to get to my car I was so distraught and stood there and cried. People saw me. How do I get over the embarrassment? I also don’t want to repeat it. Rough night with my husbands anger. I have had chest pains tonight but I downloaded some APPS for exercise and looking online at pets that got adopted at the pet shelter To see some happy situations. Trying to do everything to feel better. They day will come when I won’t have my husband, I watched a documentary and it was said “It’s not if, but when”. Trying to live in the moment even though he is causing me emotional pain, so angry and mean to me tonight. It’s like that every night. Good night everyone, hugs to you all. I learned the hard way not to take my husband out of his routine of going to adult daycare every day. I took him for a week trip to see my family and it was a nightmare. At least my family sees what I am dealing with. He was uncontrollable and refusing to take his meds and dillisuional and the list goes on. Has anyone left a loved one with a care giver overnight for a week. I thought maybe in 6 months or next October I would do another trip to see my family but I can’t bring him. I feel guilty so not sure what I am going to do. Does anyone know why when you have this disease you say mean things to the person that is caring for you?

I was told to find the humor in the situation and so far the past 3 weeks it has been nothing but anger and crying. Them my mom said something funny to me when I told her that Jim with his dementia keeps trying to leave the apartment. She says “For years you could not get him to leave the apartment to go out....now that’s all he wants to do”. It’s funny because it is true, he was such a home body that our arguments were because he would not go anywhere...now he wants out. Last week mom made her escape and walked out the alarmed front door when someone came in. She made it up the street and halfway across the field before the nursing home staff next door found her and brought her back. She told the staff she was going to get her car that I had taken before I used all the gas. Her door to her room is now alarmed with a motion sensor. Truthfully this is what brother #3 and his girlfriend were doing to mom. And after we went to court and stopped them I made the decision to enter her in assisted living. Brother #1 decided he was going to take over moms house for financial gain by renting it out. Are there no morals when it comes to your own parents. Today was a great day. Moms 96th years young day. Enjoyed lunch with cake and ice cream. I sat next to her, feeding and talking with her - truthfully her biggest concern was that she couldn’t hear the television because of all the noise. Its been a year since mom went to the assisted living memory care and she has missed her cat that couldn’t go with. A friend gave me this for her.

Mom has been in assisted living / memory care for two years now. She has only escaped the building once and wears a bracelet that sets the alarm off when she goes out an exit door. She has never gotten violent with any of the staff or other residents. Yesterday she insisted she needs to go home and will never leave again. She asked how far it was to my house and then said it was to far to walk. Her friend had a stroke and rarely comes out of her room. I think this has affected her emotionally. She insists that she is going to the doctor so that they will take the bracelet off of her wrist. She can not walk on her own and uses a wheelchair if she is anywhere but her bed or her recliner. She will be 96 in a week. I’m thinking that she is ready to go to the next world.

This is my mom. I was gone for two short weeks. She is now in a wheelchair and cannot transfer herself in or out of it. She remembered me but didn’t know that I was gone. But she let me feed her at lunchtime. Mom getting beautiful today. 95 and counting.

Mom got out of bed last night and fell in the bathroom. Stitched up and back by midnight. I was 60 miles away so her court appointed guardian had to take her to the emergency room. I was feeling pretty guilty about the whole thing but I was at a friends wedding miles away. I went to visit this morning and she told me she hated me and that I was crazy. Then she insisted that my brother who is deceased was in her room laying on the floor after he broke in the window. Tough day. I am a firm believer that your legal documents such as a will and poa’s are such very important documents to have, I now must say that the next most important thing is the person you name to execute your wishes. My brothers wanting to take over moms property and she isn’t even gone yet. This past year has been an emotional struggle for me, both with her health and well-being as well as my brothers attacks.

I picked up mom this morning and we went for a cruise on the back roads north of the town where she is in assisted living. Yikes, drove 65 miles through there. I was lost and driving in circles. I dropped her off and she said, “thanks for the ride, I don’t know where we went but I don’t think you do either.” Did she see me turn on the GPS? Some times she is so clear and the next minute she tells me my oldest brother visits her. He passed on 15 years ago. Hey guys so I know this is probably going to sound like a dumb question but I am wanting to know do people with dementia and Alzheimer’s tend to have good days and bad days? We haven’t got a diagnosis for my grandma yet but she is being tested however she phoned me last night after 10pm out of the blue and was asking me for grandads number. When I asked if she meant my grandad Arthur or her husband she said no she meant grandad Norman which is her dad. I wasn’t sure what to say at first as I never met my grandad Norman as he passed away about 50 years ago, didn’t know how to explain that to her so I did the best way I could, then she was telling me how she has decided to move into her husbands house even though it’s the same house she has lived in for the past 18 years. I phoned her husband straightaway to let her know what she had been saying and he told me that she seemed to be having a really bad day was asking over and over again where she was even know she was in the house and apparently she has now forgotten twice who her husband is and has also been saying she started seeing her dad around the house. Beforehand she just thought she could hear people in the house but now she is actually starting to see them is this a bad sign and will there be more days like this to come? I need help guys. I live in the UK and look after my Grandma part time. She’s getting a lot of scam calls on her landline and she answers them and takes them seriously and I’m worried she’s going to fall for one of them. Just yesterday she got one that told her the WiFi was going to be switched off so she unplugged the entire router. Is there anything I can do? I don’t want to take away the landline as she needs it for appointment calls etc and she always misplaces her mobile but can I put a block or anything on? I know I This is just my opinion so please don’t hate. I don’t think that adverts that are appealing for money like RSPCA etc should really be on the TV. My Grandma always watches them and wants to donate money to the cause, meaning she ends up sending money to 5-6 different charities each month shelling out a small fortune. And if we cancel them with her bank she is told about the cancellation and goes mad with us, she can’t really afford to pay out to all the different charities each month and each time she sees a different advert she starts paying them too. Stuck on what to do any advise would be lovely

Well it’s finally official, after years of tests and trials my Grandma has finally being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. She’s been put on a medication called donepezil which will help with her symptoms apparently. We shall see, anyone with experience of this medication please advise if it’s any good x Not having a good time I’m afraid. Although the I don’t live with my loved one how do you guys cope when they are phoning you 3-4 times a day 樂 this disease is really starting to take its tole on my mental health and I’m just not sure what do to. I can’t stand the fact that it takes so bloody long to get a proper diagnosis. My poor Grandma has been passed from pillar to post having scans and tests done all over the place but no one seems to be getting in contact with any results etc. This had been going on for a few years now and I know she’s either got Dementia or Alzheimer’s I just wish they would tell us what it is so we know how to prepare for it...the weight on my shoulders is getting too much at the minute 樂樂 Well seems like I’ve finally got some answers as to what’s going on with my Grandma. Had to go to a second specialist who listened to all mine and her Husbands concerns and we went through everything that’s different. She then did a memory test on her own which she scored good in, but rather than just tell us he’s not sure he said from his professional opinion she may have early onset Alzheimer’s. He is going to review the scans she had in August and send her for bloods and an EEG. Hopefully we can finally get a solid diagnosis soon ❤樂

Well that was a complete waste of time! Went to the memory clinic after waiting for weeks to hear from them only to be told my Grandmas results were inconclusive! Her PET scan and MRI came back fine so doesn’t look like Alzheimer’s but they still don’t know what’s wrong so it’s yet more testing and more waiting. There is clearly something wrong but we are still no further forward!! 樂樂 Pray for me today is the day my Grandma has an appointment at the memory clinic hopefully for a diagnosis! Not having a good morning so far she’s not sure where she lives and keeps asking to go home 樂 cannot wait to find out what’s wrong ❤樂

So my Grandma finally has an appointment at the memory clinic this coming Monday. Hopefully it’ll be her diagnosis after not hearing from them for weeks. Not sure how to feel about it as we’ve been in limbo for so long. Hopefully it’ll come as a relief when we finally know what’s happening ❤樂❤樂 I’ve just found out my Grandmas PET scan results have come back clear. But there is definitely something wrong. Anyone had this happen and it still be a dementia diagnosis?

Hey guys so I just wanted to ask a quick question for the people in this group as some of you know my grandma is currently going through the testing to see if she has dementia, i’m just want to know how long some of you guys waited until you got the diagnosis for either yourself or a loved one, my grandma has already had a pet scan done and she has some appointments to see the Neuropsychology department but it is killing me at the moment not knowing how long the tests are going to go on for as I’m wanting a diagnosis ASAP so we can start to put plans into place. I don’t want to sound impatient I just want to know what is going on just wondering what people’s time frames were x Hi everyone just wanted to thank you first of all for allowing me to join the group and share my story a little I guess. My story is about my lovely 72 year old grandma, she’s been my mother basically for the past 13 years since loosing my mam to cancer, even giving me a home for 3 years. She has not had her diagnosis of dementia yet but she is currently undergoing the tests to get a diagnosis after being back and forth to the memory clinic a few times. I first noticed subtle signs of memory problems a few years back but it was daft things such as forgetting where she had put something or having to repeat information a few times to her but I just thought it was old age. She did go to the memory clinic and was diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment and was given stuff she could do to help it. But over the past 6 months I’d say it’s gone downhill fast, she is starting to forget who is in the house with her and thinking there are people in the house when in fact she is alone (only her and her husband live there) and is even starting to forget that she is at home, asking for confirmation all the time of where she is. It’s hard at the moment as I live a fair distance away and her husband still works full time as he is younger than her but I do try see her when I can. I’ve started to research dementia and what we can do to help her if she does get the dementia diagnosis but I wanted to share my story to help people understand my current situation and I’m sure people will be able to suggest things to help us all.

So for the first time the other day my Grandma fully forgot who I was 樂 first time she has done it and I know it’s only going to get worse but I don’t know how the hell to handle it....how did you guys handle the first time your loved one forgot you? I just cried for hours and went numb 樂 Hey everyone, I need some advice. My mom has dementia. She’s still independent but my brothers and I take turns going during the week to help her with some needs. Our biggest issue right now is her obsession with bread. There’s so much food in the fridge but all she wants to eat is bread. She gets upset when there is none even though we tell her it’s not good for her. She eats bread fills her up. Does anyone else have a family member like this?

Hey everyone, in 2016, my mom was diagnosed with the onset of dementia. To this day she’s still independent except she doesn’t drive now. She spends a lot of time in the back gardening and enjoying outside. However lately, she’s been eating a lot of bread. Sometimes a whole loaf. She eats bananas and drinks water and tea but by eating a lot of bread, she’s not getting the nutrition she needs even with the food prepared for her in the fridge. She complains of being dizzy and tired. I realized she feels like that because she’s not eating the right foods. So I was wondering if you’ve experienced any of your loved ones with dementia start to crave one food even though their condition is still mild. Thanks. I don’t know if this is something to smile or cry about but my mom who has dementia likes to talk about happy things she sees in the backyard. For example, she saw some kids hanging out on the roof across the street, she keeps asking about some church she thinks is also across the street on the next block. What am I supposed to do? Obviously they’re happy things and she laughs about it sometimes but I’m like nothing is there. There’s no church, no kids on the roof etc. Thankfully she still has a good memory despite forgetting the dates and more. At what point did you decide it was best to move your loved one into a care home?

Does anyone in this group live in California? What options have you found regarding help caring for your loved one with dementia including costs? If your loved one with dementia has a caregiver at home or at another place, how much does it cost for you? Did you get any financial help? Have any of your loved ones with dementia woken up in the middle of the night, thirsty and confused about where they were but where fine the next day? Does it frustrate anyone else that there is no cure for dementia and ALZ yet? Why hasn’t a cure been found for Dementia and Alzheimer’s? Have any of your loved ones taken aricept for dementia?

In November, the ALZ association is hosting an event called “Walk to end Alzheimer’s. My mom has Lewy body dementia and I’m going to walk for her and other people who are going through this or caring for someone who has it. I created a fundraising page and linked it to my FB. Now, what’s the best way to write a short and simple note to my FB friends and family about why I’m doing this without saying the person I’m doing it for? Anyone here in the Bay Area and know of a dementia support group? How long did your loved one suffer from dementia or ALZ before they passed? Is Lewy Body Dementia the last stage before the memory goes downhill? This picture was 3 years ago. My Patti didn't know or care what day it was but we could still do things. I had learned through the few years leading up til this time what I had to do to keep her safe while making her happy. The little stuff like going to the grocery store that'd take for fkn ever to get through cause she saw so many people that "she knew"! It made her so happy to chat with folks she'd never known and the really amazing thing was how many big hearted wonderful people would know what the deal was and just talk and talk. If you're taking care of somebody you love don't you dare be ashamed of them. Take them out as long as you can and let them feel as normal as they can. The picture is of us at a really nice restaurant close to the house. A friend's band was playing on the patio area that night playing music from the late 60s early and 70s. The long term memory was still good then and my sweetheart had a monumental night seeing friends. AND drinking Coronas. Love your people. Take them out and treat them like normal as long as you can!! Don't EVEN be ashamed of them. I'm gonna apologize for my diatribe but this fucked up disease took the love of my life at 64 years old. Truthfully about 2 years ago. I thought I was ready but the finality of loss has hit really hard here in the last couple of days. The picture on the left was taken not too long before we met. Patti came to work in the office of my plumbing business. The other picture I took 2 weeks ago at the short stay in the nursing home. She's in the hospital Geriatric Behavioral Health Center now and they're adjusting her meds. Good visit with her yesterday and going today. Got her laughing yesterday. Really does suck watching your sweetheart/running buddy going away in slow motion.

My sweetheart Patti has on her favorite hat 9 years ago. The other pictures are in the last week. Patti turned 64 on July 25th. I hate this disease and pray daily for her/my nightmare to end. I still visit every day and talk to her like she understands everything I say. Took care of her by myself til May. I miss my running buddy, lover, love of my life. Fuck Alzheimer's/Dementia and everything about it. I been mad all day because of the shithole nursing home she's in. All they wanna do is warehouse her and collect the money. It's been awhile since I updated my Patti's story. She's still in the Geriatric Behavioral Health Center in Thomasville Medical Center. The Doctors are still trying to adjust her meds so her Lewy Body Dementia symptoms are under control enough that she'll be able to go to a nursing facility with a memory unit. I'd love it if she could stay long term right where she is. The Doctors, Nurses, CNAs, Social Worker, and everybody else are the best I could ever hope for. I go visit every day and have really gotten to love all them. When I leave to come home it's like I'm leaving Patti with loving family members. That's the highest compliment I can give. Patti's had a little setback because of a respiratory infection. The Doctors have been real aggressive with treatment so it wouldn't maybe go into pneumonia. She's responding to that treatment and feeling better. I'll ride over today at 12:00 to see her. I took pictures of her riding her motorcycle about 15 years ago for her to look at on Friday. She looked at them and got a big smile and I'm sure she knew it was her. She said, lookatme! I'm gonna continue to pray daily for all y'all and your loved ones. We're all in this fucked up club together and all know how dark the dark times are and what it's like to have little good

When I was doing everything, every day all day, it was normal at the time. Last December I found and got Patti into a 3 day a week daycare program. That took 3 months to realize I was off duty for 24 hours in a week. Now I'm going to visit Patti daily and everything kinda revolves around the times I can visit. The hospital behavioral health unit has strict hours. The worst part now is not seeing her much because I'm really seeing her changes. When it's 24/7 I was just not noticing. All day yesterday I was doing things that a year ago I had Patti with me while we did the same things. It was slower with her but at least she was with me. Michael Sharlow and Doug DaThug Hilliar I know y'all know exactly what it's like. This picture was a year ago April. Good warm day. We were eating lunch. Patti's stay at the nursing home was 5 1/2 days. Her Lewy Body Dementia didn't fit their plan. She went Tuesday to a hospital close to here that has a Geriatric Behavioral Health Center. Hopefully they'll get her meds adjusted so she'll be able to go to a nursing home with a memory unit. Turns out these days the patient has to be really docile to go to most places. Kinda makes me think of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. This morning Patti was admitted into a longterm care nursing facility. I've had POA and Medical POA for 6 years. If you're the caregiver get these in place. It's really hard to describe what I'm feeling. I've known I couldn't keep doing it any longer. I'm finally admitting it. The best news is that it's 10 minutes from here. I met the nurses, CNA's, and administrators and got a real good feeling. It's clean and smelled it. A hard thing in nursing homes is keeping them smelling good. It's a crazy bunch of thoughts and feelings now but I'm pretty sure tonight at 3 or 4am when I'm sleeping and not changing a soiled diaper I'm gonna get used to sleeping. I got a call from the hospital Thursday 8:30am to come get Patti. The plan had been to keep her there til a facility had an opening. I was basically told she had to come home. No discussion. The last time she'd walked was a week ago last night when I took her in the bathroom. She barely walked Thursday and yesterday some in the a.m.. Had to get her son to come help me get her up last night after slow motion sit down on the floor. My lower back is screaming today. Just called the "on call" nurse for her day care to tell Iher went I may to ahave meeting to tap with out the today. 14 women that are over the different areas of the program I got Patti in last December. The short story is they told me I'm in denial of how advanced she is. I've been doing it so long I reckon I'm just used to everything. When the Doctor that was in charge asked me to put a percentage on Hadn't posted on here for a long time. My Patti's Early Onset Alzheimer's and Dementia has moved really fast. Got her into a program in December. They pick her up at 8am and bring her home 4:30 three days a week. Before I'd been 24/7 caregiver. Having that time off has been unbelievable. I know all y'all know what it's like to have folks say, "oh I know how much work it is cause my Aunt Sally had Alzheimer's." Unless you've lived with and taken care of them you ain't got a clue what it's like. Sorry about blowing off. Went yesterday to the "quarterly assessment" for Patti. They told me based on it I'll probably have to put her in a facility here in town. I'm having a real hard time thinking about that cause a couple of years ago she'd always know I'd keep her at home as long as I could and that'd get her out of her funk mood that day. Michael Sharlow and Doug the thug Hilliar have already been through this and I have heard how hard it is. Glad for all support. Friday night my sweetheart Patti escaped Hell on earth and went to Heaven. I'm so happy for her because she's out of the miserable existence she was suffering through. I thought I was ready for this and I know it'll get easier with time, but it sucks right now. I appreciate all the interaction with folks in this group. I'll be around to hopefully help some of y'all.

I went to a reunion meeting for folks that have participated in the Tools for Caregivers Program that Well Spring Community gives. I realized last night it was 3 years ago. My Brother Timothy Crews came those 6 Thursday night's and stayed with Patti so I could go. It made me realize too how bad I've been at accepting offered help and also not asking for it. The one thing I'd say to all y'all that read this is don't make the same mistake. If it's offered accept it. Don't be shy about asking. Real friends really do want to help you.

Patti's still in the hospital. They're waiting on an opening in an interim facility to get her in to get her meds adjusted to reduce aggressive behavior and anger issues. Hopefully it'll be today. The hospital she's in is great if you're in regular part. She's still in a room in the ER. Some of her care since Thursday has really sucked. I've been feeding her most meals because they give up on first bit of refusal. I started with the idea of saying I'm realizing how much I've done for all these years. When I come home I'm kinda lost. Also realizing how screwed up my sleep patterns have been. I'm missing her snoring beside me. I really appreciate all y'all that have showed us the love you have. As of Saturday p.m. Patti's still in the hospital ER in a room. The plan now is to transport her as soon as a bed opens up at 1 of a possible 3 places within 30 mile radius. She was in and outta sleep so peaceful. I had to show the nurse how I get her to take meds by talking her through swallowing. I asked them to change Patti too. When they did the switch flipped and it was game on. If I hadn't been there they'd have had to get 3rd person to help. When I go at 8:30 that'll be the first thing I check. The CNA looked at me and said, "so she can't tell you when she needs to go?" Bless her heart. Update on my Patti. Yesterday was supposed to be the first night of a 4 night respite care stay. I had her things packed and ready to go. The van from her 3 day a week daycare picked her up at 9:30am. I got a call at 10:45 telling me she'd come uncorked at the facility so she couldn't stay. They took her to the daycare to see the staff Doctor. She lost it there. They told me they were taking her to one of the local hospitals and would be there in an hour. I was waiting 1 1/2 hours later when they finally got there. They called and I went to the entrance to the ER and they turned her over to me and left. Two people left me with an out of control Lewy Body Dementia patient to take care of and get checked in through the ER by myself. Then I found out the facility hadn't even alerted the hospital she was coming. If you've spent anytime in an ER at any hospital you know what it's like. After 1 1/4 hour waiting dealing with her they took us back. I tried to tell the girl that took her blood pressure it was not gonna work. It took me and two others to get that done. I left the hospital at 9:00 because the part of the ER she's in is where law officers bring criminals and where Behavioral Health patients come in. I left on a bed with 4 point restraints holding her down and nurses I'm new to the group today. I'm caregiver/significant other of Patti Parker. We live in Greensboro NC. Patti was diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer's and Dementia 6 years ago. Tonight will be day 33 taking Namzaric. The 3rd mornin she came down the hall and said good mornin to me. She's talkin to me and makin pretty complete sentences. My older sister called me and told me about Namzaric. I called our Doctor and she prescribed it. Don't know why more Docs not prescribing it. Its made my 24/7/365 life but more important hers a whole lot better. Not a cure but damn if it helps her and me! Hope some of y'all get as good a results Monday a.m. update on Patti. Non ambulatory, zombified. Shouldn't have been released from the hospital on Thursday like this. I'm really pissed. Waiting on a call from the 3 day a week program she's been in,since December. I'm gonna have to dig deep to be civil. Does anyone have any ideas for clothes with minimal seams? My Mom thinks all her clothes are cutting her. She is bothered to no end by the seams in her clothes.

Not looking for advice, just wanted to ask if anyone else has this issue? After dealing with my moms clothes not being where they are supposed to be, like hung in her closet or God forbid in her dresser. I removed 75 short sleeve shirts from her closets to a basement closet that she hopefully won’t look in. There is still at least 100 shirts in her closet! I dare not get rid of any one of them. She went shopping every day for years having Alzheimers, (before we knew something was wrong). She still has tags on some and has many doubles of the same top! I am amazed on the volume! My Mom qualified for hospice today. I am both happy and sad. I am happy that we will all receive some much needed help, and sad we have truly reached the beginning of the end. 樂

I hope this post is understandable. I have a few questions about being DPOA. Especially what to do if your lo who has been deemed unable to make any important financial or health decisions by two Doctors wants to give away money? I should also say, I have two siblings who have already accused me of taking my moms money for my own expenses. Of course I haven’t, and I have every possible receipt since DPOA took effect. I’m trying to really be diligent in keeping records and receipts, knowing the shit storm I’ll face from the both of them when my mom passes. I am hoping I can get some advice from someone who has gone through this. Exactly what and how much accounting will be scrutinized after Mom passes. My mom couldn’t sign a card for my sisters wedding last Sunday. Today my husband had to tell her how to spell her own name. She was supposed to sign a form for her Dr. she ended up just printing her name. Alzheimer’s sucks 樂 My mom turned 80 on the 30th. We had a big party, I’m so glad we did. She enjoyed it so much! This is a picture of her with all but two of her great grandchildren.

So this angel on earth visited mom today. Emily sang to mom for almost an hour. The happiness in moms eyes had me in tears for most of that hour. Emily is a volunteer on the hospice team from Lahey.

Sadness is when my 80 year old mother asks us to help her call my sister, while on the phone my mom asks as best as she can and in as many ways as she can to go over this sisters house for a visit. My sister continually says we are all working! And never suggests another time or day for a visit. I know this crushes my mom. Thankfully mom forgets about the call. Mom has made this call 4 times over the last month or two. Mom misses her and her family so much. I just don’t get it. My mom has started hallucinating, she’s talking with relatives alive and deceased, she’s also talking about herself in the third person. Has anyone else’s lo had these symptoms?

Well it happened! My mom has forgotten that I am her daughter. Gets really angry when I call her mom! My husband and I are trying not to call her or refer to her as mom anymore. It’s so hard not to! She is complaining to her sisters about how I’m trying to become a part of her family! This is so sad. I did buy a special automated puppy from Amazon for her. It came yesterday, and she’s all smiles. She talks to it and about it like it’s real one minute then makes another comment about it being not real the next. At least she likes it! Has anyone been called a selfish because they had to put their LO in a nursing home?? What was your reason that led you to the choice to put them in a nursing home?? Are there any caregivers here who are 35 and younger?? Has anyone here tried to put their LO in a nursing home and they were given a hard time??? Do anyone’s LO wake up at 4am, complaining that they are starving. Yet they had a good meal the night before. Did your LO know that something was wrong with them before they were diagnosed? All of us have a common evil enemy that we are up against for our loved ones. Did u know that music helps Alzheimer’s patients??? I play music from the 1970s to help awaken the person that is deep in her.

May I plz vent??? I hope that you can lend me an ear or a shoulder to lean on. Sometimes we all need somebody to lean on. I am having a difficult dealing with the challenges of caring for my mother, who has Alzheimer’s. She is very demanding and wants me to be with her all the time. I am totally worn out. I have not had a good night sleep in a long time. I have basically put my life on hold to be her sole caregiver. I am now working part time and money is tight. I am seriously thinking of doing a gofundme to help us. I have tried putting her in a nursing home to care for her but they keep throwing her out and dumping her on my lap because of her behavior. She gives them a hard time because she wants to come home. She constantly demands my 24/7 undivided attention. I don’t even have a second to take a breath. I am always doing stuff for her. My friends are out living their lives getting married and dating. They are advancing in their careers. Meanwhile, I living my life for my mother. Yet, she is very mean and angry at me. Saying nasty stuff, insulting me, and always being abusive. I am beginning to hate her. My brother or other family members never help me. I am doing this alone. Help!!!!!!!!!! Has anyone’s LO lost their sense of smell and taste as a result of Alzheimer’s?? I am thinking of obtaining guardianship because mom is making poor choices. Does anyone here resent the person you are caring for because you had to give up your entire life to care for them???

Has anyone felt jealous of their friends who are out living life, while they are stuck caring for their loved one. Are there any sole caregivers here?? Are there times that you wish that it could end and you can have your lives back???

How do you talk your other half into getting into the bathroom and getting cleaned up without fighting you I’m having that problem I try waiting a few minutes and try again see what happens Went and seen my wife Pamela today got her to smile and she actually said hello hasn’t said anything in about six months brought me to tears Had a good day with my wife hardest part is taking her back to the nursing home

Here are a couple pictures of my wife Pam at her birthday yesterday it turned out to be wonderful I have a question my wife’s birthday was today I want to get her a present for Saturday she does not have any communication skills anymore I’m just wondering what I can get her for her birthday I’m at a total loss I do plan on getting her a cake she is in a home I’m going to pick her up I just don’t know what to get her Picked up my wife today taking her to Christmas bingo with family As we all know today is a happy Fourth of July unfortunately I’m not really happy I had put my wife in a nursing home because I could not no longer take care of her I am just wondering how other people are dealing with not being with their wife on holidays

I would like to thank everyone for their support update on my wife she’s out of the hospital she’s back at the nursing home all her test came back OK blood pressure heart CAT scan they said everything was good they think it was just a combination of her medication that made her faint and dropped her blood pressure so she back at the nursing home and she’s in a new room which is good because she’s with a lady that can talk which I think will be good for Pam thank you all for your prayers I hope all is well with everyone else I hate these up-and-down feelings I get I feel so guilty about putting my wife in a home

Does anyone else feel guilty when They have to leave the nursing home from seeing their loved one How does one cope with having to put their spouse into a assisted living home because they can no longer care for them this is not easy and I don’t know how to go about doing this I feel like a big loser or I’m giving up but I can no longer take this

My wife is starting to freak out when she sees her self in the mirror does anybody else have this problem All mom wants to do the last two days walk!!! Back and forth all day long from the den to her room. Her butt barely hits the chair before she’s up and gone again. She is driving us mad! I think if not for Coke my mom would dehydrate, it’s all she will drink anymore… Mom has all of a sudden decided she isn’t hungry. What’s next? So, I make lunch for my mom and she eats. 45 minutes later my daughter makes lunch for herself and mom tells her she is hungry and wants some lunch too. How do you combat this and make her understand we aren’t starving her??

Well mom has decided that last couple of nights that she doesn’t want to go to bed. Even with melatonin she still doesn’t want to go. She isn’t willing to change her clothes either, so, who has ideas??? She does go to bed if we turn out the lights and turn off the TV but she still hasn’t changed clothes. Well mom decided last night at midnight that it was morning and that she should get up and get dressed! Finally with help from my wife we got her back to bed, but according to the camera she was back up and dressed at 1:30 and sitting in the den. So, she has been up all night and now she is gonna try to sleep all day!! Nope!!! Not gonna happen. It appears that melatonin is no longer working...... Well mom has decided she wants to lay in bed all day....not sleep...just lay in bed....weird After living with us for 3 years and getting up around 7:30 or 8:00, mom decided this week to start sleeping in. It’s at least 10:30 before she gets up, sometimes later if we let her. She is still ready for bed at 8:30 though. Odd…

It’s a sad day. I look at mom and she looks tired and haggard. This disease not only affects the mind but it also affects the physical appearance. I often wonder why people have to go through this. It seems such an unnecessary suffering considering today’s medical technological advances. People that suffer from Alzheimer’s and dementia are literally in a prison with no keys to unlock the door..... I guess we are headed down a slippery slope. Just in the last week mom has decided to stop everything. She doesn’t want to brush her teeth, doesn’t want to change clothes or her depends. She eats, she watches TV and she sleeps at with the help of meds. Its almost like she has given up...... where does it go from here?? Well another exciting afternoon of mom stomping around the house calling me hateful. She has no clue who I am or that she is living in my house. Oh the joys of caring for an Alzheimer’s patient...... This sure is a strange disease, one day mom is up fussing at her sitter the next day she wants to lay in the bed all day. One minute everything is fine and the next minute she is fussing at me for no good reason telling me I need to leave. One morning she will get up wanting hugs, the next morning she wakes up wanting to fight! Major swings in her mood seem to be more the norm. It’s like a box of chocolates, you just never know what you gonna get!! Does anyone have experience with C. Diff? My mom has had chronic UTI’s, most of which went untreated by our home health agency. Now, mom has a staph infection in her blood. The strong antibiotic for that has apparently left her vulnerable and now she has C. Diff. I understand that it’s very contagious but I’ve been told what precautions to take and I feel confident with those. My brother on the other hand, is so freaked out that he’s considering moving out of the house! That would be a disaster for me as I’m really relying on his help currently. Is he overreacting or am I missing something?

I’m so completely overwhelmed. I’m a sinking ship and my siblings just keep cutting more holes. All the while saying, “we’re here with you”. This coming weekend will be the last that I have any help for a while, probably not until mid November. I have no earthly idea how I’m going to do this on my own, but I’m also looking forward to not have them judging every little decision, complaining about so many things that my head is spinning trying to keep up with their priorities. I just want to scream! It’s been made clear to me that I’m too emotional and they don’t want to hear about what’s hard and how I feel.

I just need to vent. I’m so frustrated with my siblings right now. Last night my brother was upset with me because he thinks I need to have something to “fall back on” and “look forward to” after mom passes. It sounds absolutely absurd to me. I have some big picture plans. I want to move closer to my sister that has kids and be in their lives. For now, I’m happy to focus on my time with mom. Yes, I’m tired. Exhausted some days. But there’s nothing I’d rather be doing than caring for my mom. Then tonight, one of my sisters came over just after I got mom to bed. She wants to take my mom to Mayo Clinic in Minnesota. She thinks that maybe my mom doesn’t even have dementia. That just baffles me. My mom definitely has a variety of other health issues but nothing that would mimic dementia. Plus, this sister lives in the same town but almost never spends time with mom that would give my brother and I a break. She doesn’t come around enough to even know how mom is doing these days. It’s very irritating and she can be very punishing when she doesn’t get her way. I just don’t have the energy to deal with them while I’m caring for my mom. Thanks for listening. I’m feeling so defeated tonight. It hit me like a ton of bricks tonight that not only am I still doing a huge majority of the caregiving, but I am not even safe around my siblings! Emotionally. Here I’ve been, like an idiot, thinking that we’re all grieving and can renew our relationships, bond over our shared love for our mother... It’s not like that at all! I’m spending so much energy trying to navigate family dynamics. I’m so exhausted even though more people are helping. I’m really looking forward to my brother and his wife moving out. I at least need peace in this house.

Gotta vent. Earlier today, my sister offered to come over and help or give me a break. My mom’s needs have escalated greatly and I am sick this weekend. So, she came over a while ago and there was a lot of tension and attitude. I don’t know why. Then she asked if she could go downstairs and take a nap! I was planning to ask if I could go downstairs for a break. What the heck?!?! So frustrating. My siblings have let me know that the way I’m grieving and taking things so hard with my mom is more than they can handle. They say It interferes with handling her finances and making decisions about her care. I don’t see how my emotions affect the financial affairs that my brother is responsible for. As far as her care, I have been her live in caregiver for over a year. I want to keep her in her home as long as possible. They think that because it’s hard on me that I shouldn’t do it. That breaks my heart. I am taking her illness and inevitable death harder than them because I have the closest relationship to her and I don’t have a spouse or children. I will definitely be shattered when she goes. But I’m not living like she’s already gone, I want to spend as much precious time with her as possible. They want to get her house all cleaned out before she dies. I said, keep her main living areas the same and don’t be hauling out loads of stuff in front of her. Do they listen? No! My mom has been very upset several times. We agreed last week to bring in a skilled personal aide for three full days each week to give me time off. We are actively pursuing it and today my brother emails about when should we put mom in a facility. Inside, I’m freaking out. How did that escalate so quickly?? I hope she never needs a facility. For what they charge, we could pay personal aides to come in almost every day. Starting today, my brother will be the primary caregiver to my mom, for the next week. I’ve done it for the last year. I’m hoping he’ll understand my situation better. And we’ll have some shared experiences and can work better together to give my mom the best care possible. I just want to share a positive story. This is my first niece, born today. She is healthy and my sister is doing great! My LO, mom, is in respite care while I’m helping my sister and her family. I called mom and sent her pictures tonight. She is thrilled to be a grandma again! There are still wonderful things to come, even in the midst of this disease and being a caregiver. I’m so thankful for this joyous occasion to celebrate! My heart is so heavy tonight. My mom is getting a port placed tomorrow for the chemo and radiation treatments she’ll start next week. This is not what I want. I’m out of town visiting my sister, but I am normally the primary caregiver for my mom. My brother with POA decided on the cancer treatment and to start it before I get home. I just know that my mom doesn’t understand, even though she says she wants the treatment. I honestly don’t know how either one of us are going to make it through this. And for what? If she beats cancer, then we go back to “just” having Alzheimer’s?!?! All the added support will be gone-people know about Cancer, but they don’t understand dementia. I’m not ready to lose my mom, but I’ve spent the last year watching her slowly go. My siblings haven’t seen that. They think cancer is the worst way to die. They don’t listen. 樂 My mom does hand movements when she is anxious. I thought I could help relax her... Apparently not. Lol. I’d like some advice about communicating with my LO about pain that she is having. She says she has abdominal pain. It doesn’t seem to be severe. She normally would be able to tell me but she’s been confused for several days now. With prompting she says it’s like cramps. She has bladder cancer so that could obviously be an issue. But might be some indigestion or something. No vomiting, diarrhea or constipation. How do I find out what’s really going on?

Today has just been so damn heavy. Emotionally, physically, everything. It all hurts and it’s only Monday. I’m already exhausted and heading into a grueling day tomorrow. Just needed to vent.4

Today has been so hard. My mom is so confused and it’s one of the worst days she’s had since she got on meds. I had to take her and walk her through step by step how to go to the bathroom. She was still asking, are you sure? She didn’t remember how to turn on the faucet or use the soap dispenser. Most of my questions and comments were met with blank stares. How can there be such dramatic changes in her cognition? All week she was doing well. Tired, but pretty clear. Then today right from the start, she is just not there. It’s so extreme. Is that normal??

Advise would be great.. My mum has at 67 suffered with alzhiemers varient of frontotemporal a combination of the both.. I've been her main carer since say one. She moved to an assisted living apartment last year. We have a good routine set up. She is coming into money soon my bother who I do not get along with is all of a sudden around her I've been told the motivation is money to get it off her I've found out he's had nearly 2k already in dribs and drabs since August I'm her power of attorney and carer I'm so concerned for her finances and welfare. She sees him as her son who does no wrong but even his best friends rang me yesterday to warn me of his ways and what he's doing. Help!!! Xxxx Been up since 4am already got high anxiety cared for mum 22 hrs already since Monday... Do I cry now or later.... Hate this life!!!

This is my mum this time last year on left and yesterday on the right.. Now I know we can't stop alzhiemers nor reverse it but I think we've mastered how to change our lives to hopefully slow things down and live better as mums carer I have taught her to swim again in 20 weeks we go on walks once a week too.. I've got her joining social groups like bingo.. I cut out alcohol sugar and caffeine we eat healthy via joining slimming world we stick to routine and iv incorporated essentials oils and reflexology in her life... The difference a year can make when u add little changes has a huge impact

I really appreciate your help and advice please... So yesterday we had a meeting with a care team who haven't seen mum in over a year this lady had never met mum.. Mum has frontotemporal dementia alzhimers varied.. I went to meet the lady and burst out in tears saying how often I'm getting burn out that no family are helping and how much of a change I've seen in a year since last review.. Bear in mind mum was on a good day n you wouldn't even know anything was wrong with her if u hadn't seen her before.. Bythe end of the meeting she told me mum was good didn't need as much care and I obviously have a bee in my bonnet about something that she's worked in mental health before and thinks I need to see a Dr for myself as mums fine.. 樂 I just need a rant to strangers.. If ud of told me ten years ago at 36 u will be a sole parent for near nine years with no help financially or have any input from The father or father's side.. Ud have to put ur career on Hold to be ur mums full time carer too as she suffers ftd alzhimers and then find out ur dad has had an affair whilst ur mum needed him the most so now have to sort out they're divorce I'd of laughed at u all but oh no this is my real life and sometimes I want to run far far away... The only light my life is my little boy I thank the universe I have him around me to ground me and lift my spirit even if he does someday get a tired mummy emotional mummy or fed up mummy I will never give up because people need me xxxx rant over sorry Nanny has vascular she's been hospital bound now 5 weeks she's constantly refluxing but not much comes up she's hardly eating she's had 3 spoons of mashed carrot today she's all. Bones from weightloss and forgoten how to wee so a cathater attached now.. Does any of this sound familiar to ppl will she be out or is this it??

This came up on my time hop mum about 6 years ago.. Now this on the right is my new mum she now lives in an assisted living home she has many health issues aswell as fronto temporal dementia varient alzhiemers.. I mourn for my old mum in so many ways and have found it hard adjusting to my new mums ways charecters moods etc but two things alzhiemers can't take away is courage and love Anyone else's loved ones compulsive obsessive about things mum is constantly asking to go to asda for fruit tea.. I've just opened her cupboard to this.. 樂 Lately mum's eyes look so lost is this a sign in decline... Even my son noticed and asked if nanny was going to cry on Saturday she just looks so far away and sad

Off to the doctors this morning my caregiving has taken its toll abit too much now, I began 4 years ago then started suffering mild anxiety and worry. now I get major burn outs cry most days fall to the floor tight chested can't breathe awful sleep always tired extreme back pain sickness alot and snap easily. I pray for everyone having to go through this journey I'm only 37 and also a sole parent to my little world but lately I've not been my best state because of my care work. 樂

My mum was diagnosed four years ago with a combination of both alzhiemers and frontal lobe dementia I have cared part time for two years then full time for two years but as of Sept will be giving it up. I feel like a failure, but it's effecting my life, my health, my mental health and mine and my sons bond and lives. I've not seen friends in tears or dated any male in two years.. I cry weekly burn out monthly shout and get snappy quickly and I'm in bed before 9pm It's getting too much now. My advice to anyone do as much as u can before u burn out like me xxxx

Why is it everyone else gets the good side and the carers get the bad.. Ppl don't believe when I say how hard it is.. At times I feel like giving up on mum and going bk to work life was easy fun and free then, but If I give up caring for her and no one else will take it on out of family she will deteriorate rapidly change isn't good for frontal love dementia but this disease is waring me out I hardly laugh anymore I cry n burn out alot.

Does anyone ever sit back and think why me.. I'm 37 I already have a tough job of being my sons only parent playing both roles I've gave up my dream jobs and now even had to give up part time work because I'm so tired.. I haven't seen friends in so long not properly anyway I am always ill or tired.. Mum has fronto temporal dementia with a varient of alzhiemers.. Six months ago we found out my dad was having an affair so my brother got my mum to divorce my sad but left me to deal with it all so I've had to go through a divorce as mum's power of attorney move her into assited living care home deal with her sadness make her get used to a new life alone in a home in a new town.. Then lastnight I ring my brother so upset as all week all mums done is cry and his wonderful response was.... Oh suey love this is ur own fault getting too involved being mum's carer you should step away from mum n not visit her as much she doesn't need you she's OK... Is it normal for the caregivers to be constantly tired n worn out we haven't even done much together today but emotionally physically and mentally I'm drained I wish my old mum was still here x This disease is destroying and destructive and causes so much pain… It's been a long week and it's only Wednesday.... 樂

Mum has been away with my auntie for respite 3 days as I got diagnosed with stress and anxiety and needed to recover I've felt amazing by yesterday now today knowing she's bk I've got chest pains racing heart and can't breathe I hate alzhimers u shouldn't Feel this way about seeing amd caring for ur mum 樂 樂 樂... I pray for carers pray for those who have it and pray for my self too

Having a moment.. I wish life was back to it was three four years ago I'm only 36 I want a job a career il probably never get that... I want to see my friends maybe one day find a partner have some free time to socialise I miss being me so bad.. But then I feel guilty for wishing these things I hate life... Anyone else get that horrible sense of guilt anger and sadness whenever they wish they had a life of their own or old lives back 樂樂 Anyone else find it really hard to accept ur loved ones new charecter my mum used to be so fun full of life kind and energetic now she's slow moody angry confused and just a shadow of who she used to be.. Its so hard.. I miss mum even tho she's still alive. 樂 i got a question why is it most care givers tend to end up with health problems either during caring for their loved ones or after they pass away even if the care giver goes to the doctors and have different tests done well i wanted to tell everyone what has happened since my mom passed away. well i went from smoldering multiple myeloma to full blown multiple myeloma i have to start chemo in a week or a week and a half and i found out i have a blood disorder as well it is called factor 8 which is hemofelia on the high end factor where my blood clots. i guess now it is time for me to take care of myself. but i wish my mom was here so i can tell her and so she can help ,e threw this. what i am saying please what ever u do if your a caregiver pllease take care of yourself as well as your loved one.

Well my mom's birthday was Sunday. I couldn't even hardly get out of bed I slept all day and all night I was going to get a cake just to celebrate her life but I just couldn't bring myself to even get out of bed or even wake up. This was her first birthday that she has been passed away. I would have gotten the cake and went to her cemetery but I wouldn't have any place to put her piece like I did with my brother's cake when he died because my mom isn't Barrie's in the ground she is in a mausoleum. How long after a parent passing away will it be easier to deal with their passing. Im getting tired of crying and missing my parents.

Why was it easier to mourn my old mom when she was alive but it is so hard to mourn the mom that died. This is the tattoo i got for my mom

I have a question how long did it take for someone to get rid of their loved ones clothing after they passed away. The reason why i am asking is because i cant bring myself to get rid of my mothers clothing.

Just wanted to let everyone that i am doing ok and i went back to work lastnight. My mom and dad would want me to live my life and move past all the drama and bs. Work went fine yesterday and today. I just wanted to let everyone know how i am feeling and what i saw in the clouds today whole driving to ny. Im feeling fantastic ty everyone for your prayers. If you are wondering what i saw in the clouds was an angel praying. My beatutiful mother and my handsome dad they are fully together My Mums is Bed bound, so the carer told me about Chlorhexidine shampoo cap absolutely brilliant x

Thankyou for letting me join your group X My Mum as Vascular Dementia & Alzheimer’s We are in our 5th year that we know of, My Mum is now bed ridden since December 2018, we ave Carers coming in 4 times a day. We can only get biscuits and coffee into her, and she only sips her coffee, we ave fresh water there for her. She smokes she as gone down from 15 cigarettes a day to 4 (The family done this ) the doctor wanted her to stop all together, but every time she has her cigarette she wants another, she on No Medication that all stopped when she went into hospital for 3 weeks. Her only pleasure is a fag and a small glass of sherry...... My Dad is 81yr and is her Carer..... Are we doing wrong in giving her these two treats..... I’m sat with Mum while Dad as a Weekend break, Mum is bed bound so we can’t go out, can’t ave the patio windows open cause the Bees 樂 keep coming in, curtain close cause we can’t see the TV. Got NCIS on back to back. Happy Easter to you and your love ones樂樂 Thank you for all the information over the last 9 months. You've all been like one big family. But it's time to move on Mum & Dads Funeral was yesterday a sad day for All but they both left this world together ❤樂樂 Be kind stay safe and love them 樂樂 It's been a week today my Dad passed away from phenomena and COPD. We didn't expect this it as hit my brother and my self like a ton of bricks. Dad was Mum soul carer, mum as mixed dementia and Got told today Mum in her last stages of Vascular dementia/ Alzheimer’s, we got told this is February, But lots more as happened this weekend...... so we will take one day at a time 樂樂 Mum keeps dropping her cup good job it's got a lid She also bed bound so we are on our 3 quilt anybody else having the same problem 樂樂 My Mum hasn’t spoke for 2 days is this common 樂 Mum as now got Jaundice Just glad she in not in Pain 樂樂

Any body else LO have fits??? Mom never wore long sleeve...even in the winter. She was always complaining of being hot. That has all changed now, so I bought some new long sleeve gowns for her. Green is her favorite color so she loves this one!! Please excuse the wall behind her...we are doing some renovations at the moment.

Ok...with Mom not able to get out of bed now I am having to change her diaper and wipe her. However, she is fighting me...yelling for help, grabbing the diapers, pulling my hair, pushing me, grabbing my hands. I need any advice on making this easier for both of us. I've tried explaining what I'm doing but she does not understand. I'm rolling her to her side, folding and tucking the diaper (like I was shown to do when I had to change dad) but she is fighting me with rolling her even. Any advice would be appreciated Mom has had nothing to drink today, no food since Thursday (she did have ensure over the weekend, but it took 3 days for one bottle and it still wasn't finished). Hospice is going to be coming out every day, at this point her vitals are good and she is resting comfortably. Her journey and suffering with this horrible disease is almost over.

As my husband and I were getting mom changed and turning her last night she had a few minutes of clarity...she knew who I was and I was able to talk to her and love on her for a few minutes before she drifted back to sleep. I was able to tell her how much I love her, that I know she is tired and it's ok for her to go be with dad, I told her I'll miss her but that I will be ok and I'll see her again someday. She is still with us this morning and I'll continue to love on her and talk to her...maybe she will have another moment of clarity, but if not at least I had those few precious minutes to hold on to. 樂樂

Mom has not walked more than the couple little shuffle steps it takes to transfer from bed to potty, potty to transport chair, transport chair to recliner in over a week (all with assistance). Hasn't been able to get up from her recliner without assistance in over a month, has to have assistance getting into bed for over 2 weeks. This morning, the alarm goes off letting us know she is awake...I was brushing my teeth so my husband went to her...she was standing at her bedroom door!! She got out of bed and walked to her door by herself this morning!! Of course, this may never happen again...or maybe it will happen frequently...we just never know what is going to happen from one moment to the next on this journey!! Its Thanksgiving, and 3 weeks since mom passed away. The holidays are hard for caregivers so I wanted to check in today and tell you all that I love you and that that you are all awesome!! Mom chewed up her blood pressure meds this morning. I could not get her to stop, could not get her to Itake need a drinkadvice...I and believeswallow I knowthem...she what justthe rightkept chewing.answer is for mom but I'd like to hear your thoughts and opinions please. I agreed to blood work last week in the hopes that it would help mom get approved for hospice. It seems all Mom had an appointment with her cardiologist today, she has lost another 9 pounds in a month. She just doesn't want to eat. I've tried everything...I know it's part of the disease but it is really hard to watch. She was 138 in March, 128 in July, 118 last month...now 109.

The hospice nurse that came out to draw mom's blood only brought one tube with her...one tube! So, you are going to draw blood from a dementia patient with kidney disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, and who isn't drinking or eating much...and you only bring one tube? She was not successful and now has to come back again tomorrow...mom's upset and I'm upset. She said another girl packed her bag for her today but she will pack it tomorrow and be more prepared...not sure I believe that excuse...but she was very apologetic, not that that helped mom any.

It's heartbreaking how fast mom has declined. She became bed bound on Friday. I got hospice here for her Friday afternoon, got a hospital bed by Friday night. Yesterday all I got in her was 3 ounces of ensure...and so far today all I've got in her is 5ml of water that I dissolved her meds in.

Mom has been a 2 person assist this week, thankfully my husband has been able to help me... however, this morning, we could not get her up for the day. So today, for the first time, mom is staying in bed...I'm worried that this is going to be permanent. Palliative care is supposed to be here Monday but I'm going to call them this morning and discuss how much she has declined in the past couple weeks. I'm slowly starting to live life again. Yesterday my husband and I went shopping, not a planned in advance grocery shopping thing but a spur of the moment "hey let's go to the mall" thing. And today we decided we didn't feel like fixing dinner so we went out to eat, just grabbed our coats and the keys and off we went. It still feels strange and I fight feeling guilty for enjoying being able to do things like this again...and when I'm out I often find myself rushing so I can hurry home and then remember that I don't have to rush home anymore. I miss mom so so much...I'm slowly starting to live life again and I know that is what she would want. I am in desperate need of a good night's sleep!! I know I'm not alone here...you all know exactly how I feel! 樂樂

Not looking for platitudes or just hang in there or prayersThese don’t work for me anymore I can’t just abandon wife but don’t k ow how much more I can take Life really isn’t worth it anymore How the hell does one keep their emotions in check when dealing with totally irrational Person Wife has dementia possibly Alzheimers I know it’s the disease and not her Iknow all that stuff I’ve listened to Teepa Snow and all that but bottom line is the disease is terminal 99 percent of treatments are failures I am so pissed off right now Font tell me it will get better or that I’ll get through it Life has changed and will never be the same why even bother anymore Just came across this Kinda helps me dealing with wife”s illness “Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved” by Barb Johnson With all the problems Alzheimer’s brings and heartache My wife with all the problems is still my wife to be loved and cherished even through my tears and frustrations and worries

It’s a learning process with this illness I am learning that my “morning “ attitude can set tone for the day My wife is glad “good John” is here today I am learning to just go with my wife’s reality and kinda how to translate it in my mind How I need to ask her if it is ok to do something like dusting and housework asking if she thinks “John” would mind me dusting or whatever I might need to do I think this allows her to have a hand in day to day things as well as keeping an eye out and letting her make the coffe for us both At least at this point I am grateful for this cooperation between us and adjusting to her reality I read so many other posts and the difficult experiences of others and it helps me to be grateful Words of love and encouragement to all out there in the “the trenches”

Maybe next t quiet right analogy but sometimes it feels like I am raising children all over again I know this isn’t so but kinda to me seems like it First time I got in trouble for cleaning the house lol Wonder what the suicide rate with caretakers of spouses with moderate Alzheimer’s

Why do people feel it is “ok” to post pre Alzheimer’s and pre Alzheimer’s photos of loved ones It’s in my opinion no better then showing one photo of my wife Alive then showing here she is in her coffin We don’t need to be reminded of the devastation brought on by the disease It does service to no one Has anyone heard or read book on Alzheimer’s by Dr Bredeseno Have to keep my sense of humor being with my wife seems like a cross between the movie Groundhog Day and Fifty First Dates Wow where to start I wonder if I am losing my mind I swear I left my wallet and care keys on counter yesterday This morning wallet there but no keys We had an appointment to have dogs groomed I got upset and let my emotions get better of me Anyway finally found spare key now at dealership spending more money Then friend who was supposed to have lunch with wife canceled The only way I can “reach out” to my wife is by calling her on her phone and listening about this other man why won’t I come home am I with somebody else (right hand count ?) why won’t I come home I love you but when I am home she doesn’t know me I wish I could know what is going on inside her Brain I know it is the illness I realize that understand that but why over the phone she knows my voice yet in person with same voice no connection Don’t know if there are any Rocky Horror Fans in group but song “Trying to stay inside insanity” keeps popping into my head Good morning been up unable to sleep I was wondering (as I guess we all are) why my wife seems to be “declining “ quickly Our primary doctor said it was Alzihmers but we are waiting to get her to neurologist We went to one neurologist about 6-7 months ago and he said my wife scored a thirty out of thirty on memory tests I asked her about “these people “ she sees and I asked her what did they look like She said one is kinda tall ( I am) and one is shorter. I’m just rambling on here Tell me something Is it wrong to find humor in following situation My wife doesn’t know me doesn’t recognize me as her husband John In her mind John is gone she doesn’t know where No humor there but she is on phone with a lady friend who knows nothing of current condition and told her John isn’t home she doesn’t know where John is Lady friend keeps pumping my wife for info about me This lady friend is thinking I have abandoned my wife or is cheating on her My wife stepped outside so I (the guy in her mind) won’t over hear conversation Can only imagine lady friend thinks “John” is a dirt bag or something to that fact

Good evening everyone As I have shared. My wife who is suffering from Alzheimer doesn’t know me or maybe better to say doesn’t recognize me I received a heart breaking text from her today and it is just breaking my heart She feels so heartbroken because she feels that I don’t love her anymore doesn’t know why I won’t come home wants to do the things we talked about just as I retired I know it’s the disease that doesn’t allow her to “ know me” The reparation of stories or not remembering or sometimes not knowing how to make coffee I can handle or deal with these things It is the emotional aspects that is killing me inside

My wife has been diagnosed dementia with symptoms of Alzheimer’s just a couple of weeks ago We have to wait until June 4 to be seen at Cleveland Brain Institute of Las Vegas We have been married for twenty years yet she doesn’t know who I am I have sleep in different bedroom When she asks where I was born she says that’s nice so is my husband John Or we went shopping today I bought pretzels and she said You like pretzels so does John We watched Glen Campbell special I had tears streaming down my face she showed no emotion and didn’t even acknowledge I was crying I know it’s the illness or the disease I think what bothers me is there is no hope with this illness at least with a lot cancers not all there is a fighting chance Here there seems no chance no hope and that’s what kills me The only blessing is my wife doesn’t realize this cold hard fact New phrases I am starting to hate Stay Strong You can handle this Hang in there to name a few If this disease has taught me anything during this “battle” life is so very short and fragile I am learning not to take anything for granted anymore I am learning to have more compassion I am learning that life is not fair we do not always get what we want I-am learning that I am not alone in this and other life struggles I am learning that nothing here on earth lasts forever that one day everything ends the good the bad the joy and the sorrow Is there a phrase your LO repeats CONSTANTLY? My mother’s is “What am I doing?” 10 times today as I’m feeding her dinner. 12 times when she was on the toilet. And countless other times during the day. It is very draining My mother, stage 6, is on Aricept and Namenda. Hospice refuses to pay for those meds anymore because they don’t have to. They’re saying she hadn’t declined enough while she’s been with them on the Alzheimer’s diagnosis and they gave me a 5 day discharge notice. I wanted to keep her on hospice and they ended up changing her diagnosis from Alzheimer’s to colon cancer. I asked them to make it a dual diagnosis. They said they can only treat one diagnosis but can document multiple. Of course this means they will only pay for one as well. I’m not treating her for the cancer. I begged them to pay for the dementia meds and they said no as she’s not on hospice for that anymore, just the colon cancer. For those of your LO on hospice, does this sound normal? What can I expect symptom wise if I take her off Aricept? What can I expect symptom wise if I take her off Namenda? Thanks

It’s the damn questioning that drives me insane. Never ending. Always repeating. Do not give me the “It’s the disease” or “she did it for you” crap! I timed in 2 hours how many questions she asked us. ... 115. 樂 I’m still shaking my head in disbelief. THREE THOUSAND SIX HUNDRED AND EIGHTY is the average number of how many questions she asks me on a weekly basis over and over and over again. If I write it down, she still asks. If I answer it, she will ask me twice more. It’s exhausting! Yes, I will miss her voice but NO I will NOT miss this. It’s gotten to the point where I dread her opening her mouth. Never a conversation. Never a statement. Only multiple questions Name 1 thing that drives you insane that your LO does. Next, name 1 thing you’ve heard others complain about and you’re thankful that your LO isn’t doing that (yet!) My answers: 1. The CONSTANT questioning. No conversations. No statements. Only Questions. The same questions. Over and over and over again. 2. I hear so many caregivers complain about their LOs saying mean things or being physically aggressive. I am very thankful that she is always in a pleasant mood. At least for now, lol. She’s gone 樂樂樂樂樂 I pray my beautiful mother is hugging her own mother and dancing with my beloved father. My heart is broken. I cannot thank you all enough for your prayers Update on my beautiful mother. She has suffered for 8 long days at the hospital with no food and no fluid (she aspirated when she gets either and ends up in coughing spells.) She is completely unresponsive. Truly a heartbeat and a set of lungs, period. We are at the hospital all day, watching her die minute by minute. I cannot begin to tell you the level of torture that exists watching a dead body breathing. She’s gone, yet she is still here. I wake up in the middle of the night hoping my reality was just a nightmare. But when I open my eyes in the morning, the truth punches my heart. Eight days is such a long long time. It truly is. When it comes to watching a loved one pass I used to think that hours and days were a measure of time. They’re not. They’re a second of watching tv, a minute of remembering you need to pay the bills you’ve been ignoring, an hour of thinking of your life without your loved one, and a million years of tears. Thank you everyone for your kindness and gentle words. I hope that when she goes to Heaven I have the strength to stay in this group so that I may help you guys the way you have helped me ❤樂 Hospice is not involved. For OUR family, it is better that she is at the hospital. All I can say is “Friggin Wow!” I honestly never expected to get such an amazing level of responses on my earlier post about my dying mother I have received so much love and understanding and support that it blows my mind. I don’t know any of you personally, but sitting in the hospital room and reading all of your responses has been such a welcome distraction from just watching my mother die. I cannot thank you enough for that. Update: she’s a lot worse. She cannot walk. She sleeps a lot. In ONE DAY She literally went from being able to whisper sentences to us, to now just making unintelligible sounds. We try so hard to understand what she is saying so we put our ear right next to her mouth in a hopeful attempt to hear even one word, but all we hear is her sad attempt to communicate with us and our desperation to try to make out anything. Her bony body is so tiny. Her face is so gaunt. She looks exactly like those heartbreaking photos of Holocaust victims. I cannot believe that only a few days ago she was walking and talking and reading and writing. I just cannot fathom it. She is not receiving any fluids or nutrients anymore. I never never ever wanted to starve or thirst her to death. The day we gave her 2 straws full of water and tiny tiny amounts of pudding (less than a quarter of a teaspoon), she was up all night coughing and had to have lots of phlegm? Pudding? Water? Combination? suctioned out of her mouth. And that is why we aren’t doing it anymore. On my posts the other day I said that I had such an internal battle within me. I so strongly wanted for her suffering to be over and for her to go to heaven. But at the same time I desperately desperately wanted so badly for her not to leave. Asking for prayers and guidance. My beautiful mother is in the hospital. The colon cancer came back and is “all over her body” according to the doctor. She is very weak. They put an NG tube in to feed her. Haven’t started the food yet. Should I? My brain is saying; “feed her, she may get better and stronger and who the hell wants to die from starvation anyway?” It’s been exactly a week since she last ate. Then my brain says “For what? She’s going to die from stage 4 cancer anyway.” Then “But at least she will be alive for x amount of time” The 3 of us (me and 2 kids), are crying our eyes out. Constantly She stares into space a lot, sleeps a lot, but can answer questions with a very weak voice, even wrote a few sentences to us, walked a little bit down the hallway with PT yesterday. she is looking at a book we have her just now. So she’s a little still here and that’s what makes this so difficult. If she was in a coma or something it might be easier to make this decision. She is aspirating so she will die if she isn’t fed. Either we withhold food (starving her to death), or we give her the food so she can die from colon cancer. Have any of you had to make this choice? What did you do? This is brutally terrible. Here I am for the millionth time wishing this was over. It’s been TEN YEARS! When is enough, enough? This can go on for 20 years. I would rather be dead than do this another 10 years. I prayed to God today. I prayed he would kill my mother. Or me. I changed her pull up 4 times in less than an hour. Of course you know damn well that my day consisted of a hell of a lot more than this. But this was my breaking point. She peed on the toilet seat twice and the floor once. Again, this was just the straw that broke me today. Do any of you wonder if you have died and live in hell? There is no joy in her life. There is no joy in my life. Everything hurts her. Everything. She can’t move at all without help.

My mother, stage 6, has had dementia for TEN years now. I’m just so done. Truthfully. I wish she was in Heaven because I feel like I am in hell every day of my miserable existence. From the time I wake up until the time I go to bed, my entire “life” revolves around what my mother needs. I just wish she would pass very gently and peacefully in her sleep. It’s what she wants too. Anyone else feel invisible? Stressed to the max? Feel like it will NEVER be over? Mom super resistant when trying to change her diaper or clothes, or get her on toilet. To the point of slapping me, being rude/nasty and stiffening her legs so I cannot move her or get her to step into her pants, or tightening her arms so I cannot change her top. Need tips on how to handle that. I talk gently to her, however last night I lost my cool because she was being super combative. Sometimes it's hard to separate the person from the disease. Once in a while I find myself getting annoyed at the person even though that person would not normally do the things they do. How did you learn to separate that (aside from the "it's the disease" mantra which I've read ad nauseam and doesn't do the trick for me). I noted on a pad of paper when my daughter is visiting and my mom added her own note. Interesting that she used a shorthand symbol. And amazing the type of information she has retained, even though none of it is really understandable. What do you do when they won't respond to redirection? Last night she was really anxious and testy, when I tried to redirect she said "leave me alone!" she kept going into the refrigerator and grabbing things in the kitchen. She usually gets more testy in the evenings but redirection normally helps her. For whatever reason she wasn't buying it from me. I really thought she needed a bowel movement but she refused to sit on the toilet, a lot of the time after a BM she calms down but not last night. I tried to distract and redirect but she wouldn't have it. We had a great day together but sometime after 5 pm Mr. Hyde decided to take over, even after her pm meds and supplements. update below I have been out here staying with my mom away from my family for 9 months. No other family around so it has been very lonely. Tomorrow morning I have a hearing to approve my petition to move my mother out of state, so I can take her home to Colorado and get her into a memory care and be close to the family. She has nobody here except her brother who lives pretty far and has a disibility and doesn't drive, he is fine with her moving out of state. Welcome prayers for a good outcome. All the roadblocks were addressed but it seems like California courts make everything so difficult and they seem to always reschedule another hearing for one reason or another. Hoping that won't be the case and it will get approved. That would be a great relief to get her into a facility. My husband flew in today to come to the hearing with me, and my kids are going to be praying along with us at 8 pm. My sons are in Colorado and my daughter is in Arizona. update - the hearing went super quick and the judge approved the move. so happy. all the paperwork may take a couple weeks to a couple months. thanking all of you for your prayers and wishes. you guys are One thing she likes to do is the dishes, which go into the dishwasher after she's done, but tonight was a short one.

Last week my daughter and I took my mother to a restaraunt. She was really ansty but eventually settled down. There was a bratty little kid screaming at the top of its lungs, it was ear piercing. My mother said loudly "I wish they would shut the hell up!" Fortuantely or maybe unfortunately the family wasn't in earshot. Mom kept getting into the fruit bowls on the counters, cutting into the fruit and moving the fruit around, in the afternoon when sundowners hit her. At first it was cute, then it started getting very annoying and then downright irritating, as she would cut into avocado's, citrus and mangoes and then just leave them on the counter. So I got this hanging basket and she no longer does it and now I have more counter space! I also have to remember to put the knives away and not leave them on the counter after I wash them - I started putting them in the back of the drawer behind the cutlery tray, she still takes the silverware out though.

So the queen had a good night's sleep last night, finally, and now her sundowning is at an all time high. She is very agitated as I caught her figuring out how to open the stove covers and turn on a burner full force. Then when I was trying to fix that she plugs the bathroom sink and turns the faucet on full force and walks away. This is what I had to do to Alzheimers-proof the stove (let's hope it works) - cover the already covered stove knobs; cover the stove with baking pans; place a very heavy portable oven over the pans. Then give her applesauce with 2 droppers of cbd oil. I hope that calms her down. Grateful having installed locks on all the inside doors. I finally put a flip lock on the kitchen door and a safety gate on another opening so she doesn't go past the hall for after bedtime. So if she gets up at night she has the bathroom down the hall and that is it. I had a much better sleep last night because I finally didn't feel like I had to sleep with one eye open. As long as I can get to sleep myself I can get a fairly decent night's sleep now. Some of the things that I thought would have stumped her but she figured out: 1) the guardian lock, she figured it out while I've had to train people how to use it, go figure! - I had to add some other locks for back up 2) new Rubbermaid food storage containers, she figured out how to open the lid - still thinking about a solution for those 3) metal shafts on stove - removing the knobs didn't fix the problem, she will still turn them on with the shaft, I'm getting safety knob covers 4) During meal times, I have to give her one dish or cup at a time, if she gets a cup or dish or bowl with another she will pour the contents one into the other. So I line up all her dishes in a row and hide them behind the Instant Pot, and will give her the next one after she finishes each dish bowl or glass of something. Which reminds me... 5) the instant pot. She will not leave it alone! She will play with the lid, she figured out how to take it off, and she unplugs it all the time. I will probably have to put it away in a cabinet. Today is a time of cleansing, starting off with acai smoothie bowls for me and mom. Treating our temples with care. Will be going through all the frozen fruits and veggies I have stored up in the freezer, hope to get it empty or close by the end of the year. Happy Sunday, thought it would be nice to have a positive thread about something good that happened, or something we are grateful for. Mine is that the Queen slept through the night, and I finally woke up at 6 am (instead of 3am and not being able to back to sleep), just getting a few extra hours of sleep is going to make a big difference in my day. Any little or big thing you are grateful for today? Today is my mom's birthday, took a chance and got her a baby doll named "Annie" (my moms name is Anne). I think she's in love with it, she cannot stop talking to it.

A friend informed me that using morphine speeds up the end of life process. Esssentially it helps end their life. I have never heard that and wanted to ask those here who are in the know if that is true. I thought morphine was for pain management not speeding up the dying process. Just wanted to add I am not faced with this decision now, but will be sooner or later for my mother when her time comes. This discussion came up with a friend whose grandmother was a nurse and said that she wanted morphine at her end of life process. So I have been using the cannibis oil with my mother and I have to say it has made a world of difference. Mind you there are still difficult days but the severity has been much reduced. My neighbor gave me a sample because she didn't use it, and then she wanted it back to try with her husband with Vascular dementia, when I told her how great it was, lol. So then when I went to order from the neighbor's supplier, I was shocked to find out it actually contains about 20% THC (the stuff that makes you high), and that the oil that has zero THC usually doesn't work. I felt a bit conflicted about ordering it because of that, but went ahead with the order because she had been using it for a solid week already and she has improved so much. Besides she is taking a pharmaceutical for anxiety and it didn't seem to be improving her angry episodes very much. They suggested starting with 3 drops, I worked it up to about 10 with her PM meds that are crushed and mixed into applesauce. And if she is still very active I will give her a few more drops in some pudding before bedtime. People at her daycare are saying they have seen a marked improvement in her and that she is smiling a lot more in the past couple of weeks. She doesn't even get any in the AM -- she gets it after she comes home from daycare. The cannibus oil which was once working is now not working, she is super angry and nasty at night 8 times out of 10 and it's been very hard when I need to change her and clean her BMs up (yes I incorporate Teepah Snow techniques and that usually doesn't work when she gets that angry and she ends up having her episodes). The geriatrician is talking about trying Respirdal (sp?) which is an anti-psychotic he warns there is a possibility of side effects of stroke or death which is low but still possible even at low doses. Would like some opinions about it, has anyone tried this? This can be hard on the caregiver's health, what do you do to take care of yourself, physically? While waiting for the anti anxiety med to start working for her sundowner's, I'm adding in melatonin. Anybody ever try that? I think this is better than a brick and mortar support group. I was sent an invitation to one that cost $100 a month and meets once a week from 5 - 7:30 pm. I can't even imagine the traffic in LA just to get there let alone that is the time I'm on my own with my mom after the caregiver leaves. I wonder if they get anyone to come to the group, and if they do they are likely not the main caregivers but have their LO's in a facility so how could every person find a relatable situation. It's way more likely to find someone here to match and understand your unique situation.

This is really random but once in a while I see the most ridiculous advice given here. It would be nice and more helpful - that instead of telling people what to do, tell them what you have done for your loved one and how it worked. Chances are this won't get read by the people who need to read it, I guess it's just more of a venting post.

Let's post the happy **BEFORE** photos of our loved ones! Let's remember how they used to be! Would love to see what your loved one used to look like before this disease took over them. Here is my BEAUTIFUL mom, about 7 years ago with my daughter during her high school graduation. I will not post what she looks like today, this thread is for remembering our loved ones the way they used to be! What did your loved one look like before?

Mine no longer seems to care about her posture. She used to be so diligent about doing back exercises. Now she sits in the sofa like a teenager with her bottom all the way to the edge of the cushion, and she walks around with her body slumped over. I wonder why that is.

What kinds of crazy absent-minded things have you done in your exhaustion? A couple times when I am crushing moms meds, I mix up the am and pm and put them in the wrong containers. So the pm meds go in her morning applesauce cup, while her am meds go in her to-go applesauce container. I always catch myself. Also I couldn't find the jar of applesauce this morning, and finally found it in a totally random place hiding in opposite side of the fridge from where I normally put it. I know mom didn't do it because she didn't go near the fridge yesterday. I have also blamed my mother for things that I did, like I left things on a weird place or put it out of her reach and though she put it somewhere when in fact it was me who was the culprit. I always realize that I did the crazy thing later so it gives me some relief that I'm not losing it (yet!) Wondering if anyone else does these crazy absent minded things. I have been thinking about how my life is going to be after this season, of a loved one with dementia, is completed, and I don't want to be that person who has been broken and injured and defeated afterwards. I want to be that person who lives a full, joyful and meaningful life. The kind of person who, just when you think they always had everything so effortless & easy, you come to find out they have been through the harshest trial and tribulation to the hilt and survived. And because of those rough seasons they have been shaped and formed to live a wonderful life and appreciate every present moment. P.S. I understand that this is so much rougher on spouses than it is on children, grandchildren and siblings.

What kinds of crazy absent-minded things have you done in your exhaustion? A couple times when I am crushing moms meds, I mix up the am and pm and put them in the wrong containers. So the pm meds go in her morning applesauce cup, while her am meds go in her to-go applesauce container. I always catch myself. Also I couldn't find the jar of applesauce this morning, and finally found it in a totally random place hiding in opposite side of the fridge from where I normally put it. I know mom didn't do it because she didn't go near the fridge yesterday. I have also blamed my mother for things that I did, like I left things on a weird place or put it out of her reach and though she put it somewhere when in fact it was me who was the culprit. I always realize that I did the crazy thing later so it gives me some relief that I'm not losing it (yet!) Wondering if anyone else does these crazy absent minded things.

For those who are too physically exhausted and emotionally drained from caregiving, do you think it would easier on you to work full time instead and pay for caregiving to give yourself relief? I don't know what made me think of that, but just wondering if that is a viable solution.

A lot of hurting and sometimes angry posts. I am also going through a lot of these emotions, not only with my mother but from others, and I am working on just accepting that people are going to be the way they are. And they may not like the way I am handling things, but I'm doing the best I can and in the best interest of my loved one with the disease. As hard as it is to accept the feelings and actions of who I cannot control, it will eventually resolve a lot of stress, anxiety and anger I feel, in turn giving me more peace and happiness. This starts with accepting that my mother is how she is as well as others who are upset, angry or trying to tell me how to handle things. I just have to let them be who they are, I don't have to agree with them and I can continue to do things the way I see fit within my control. I cannot control others just myself.

Does anyone get a stress-induced itchy rash? I believe the stress I have been having over trying to help my mom has contributed to developing a rash, I had it this past December when I had bronchitis and low-grade fever, now it is back. I am a few days before my cycle so that may be another contributing factor. I took a antihistamine so now they are flatter. It is not shingles because it's on both sides of my body, and mainly on my body, around bra- strap, stomach, chest areas. Any idea on how to treat it other than the antihistimine - I don't want to go to the clinic where all the flu patients are.

I am starting to understand why conservators and guardians rarely take care of the loved one themselves. What do you do if your LO has a nose bleed and they don't let you wipe their nose or hold a tissue to their nose? The first time I held it there and counted to ten loudly but it didn't work after that, she kept yelling at me to get away. Lord help me the last thing I need to do is call an ambulance because my mommy won't let me dab her bloody nose.

Please can someone give me some advise about how to encourage my mum to take a shower. Literally last week was the last time she agreed to have a wash, now she is point blank refusing to, she is incontinent at night and I’m so worried she’s going to get a nasty infection from being unclean 樂 let alone the smell Hi has anyone got any tips I can pass on to my dad who is my mums main carer about washing and hygiene please? my mum is now not bothered about getting washed and dressed and sometimes is getting dressed before having a shower and then argues when my dad tells her she needs to wash. He really doesn't know how to handle this situation. Thank you Hi, does anyone’s LO become faint, shaky and feel nauseous after having wet the bed/floor? My mum has also had an episode of diarrhoea which she was completely unaware of on her way to the bathroom after one such episode, is this related? 樂

Hello, my first time posting here...my mum is yet to be diagnosed, she has an appointment at the memory clinic on 18th Jan and has had an MRI so hopefully we may get some answers. Today I felt so sad and bad as I brought up the matter of me going to the appointment with her but she became defensive and says she wants to go alone, I told her I need to go as she will tell the doctor she is ok and wont be able to tell the doc whats been occurring, with that she got quite upset as she's convinced we are 'ganging up' on her...she is so unaware that anything is wrong and blames all her 'mishaps ' and problems on other people and reasons. Now I feel so guilty at what she feels we are putting her through...is this normal to feel like this ? 樂 Has anyone got any tips on how to deal with when your LO makes something up which you know isn’t true, do you tell them it didn’t happen like that or what?! I’m finding I’m upsetting my mum because my knee- jerk reaction is to disagree with her 樂

Hi my dad is really struggling with my mum who I’d say is around stage 4/5 as she won’t cooperate with him for anything, example: she is becoming increasingly incontinent and when he asks her to put a pad on she refuses or says she has when she hasn’t. This goes on with everything down to taking a shower, eating, drinking, she was always a strong willed person and this is proving to be a very difficult situation and my poor dad is in pieces all day every day 樂 he can’t cope and I’m so worried about his health deteriorating, he loses his rag with her as he’s so stressed 樂 Hi how have you told your LO’s friends or other members of the family about their condition? My mum doesn’t want people to know, but I know I’m going to find it difficult not to say anything especially when she does or says something out of character 樂 My mum was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s today..I need a big hug 樂

Hello, I have a question, has anyone suspected a LO has dementia but they have found they have not got it? Hi its d-day tomorrow as my mum has her first appointment with the memory clinic and hopefully we will get some answers, what I wanted to ask was is there any tips or suggestions you can give me about the appointment..ie questions to ask the doctor? what to mention? Feel once we cross this threshold life is never going to be the same :( thank you

Hi when people say ‘my lo has had dementia X amount of time’ do you generally take it from diagnosis? As my mum was diagnosed in January and the doc said we’ve got it early, but I reckon she started showing signs at least two years ago, so where would that put her in regards of how long has she had it? Hi has anyones LO been diagnosed with Picks disease (Frontotemporal dementia ) ? Hi, is it normal for the carers to get confused about stuff as they are constantly living in their love ones 'dementia' world? I'm worried about my dad as he's got really confused about things for the past few weeks 樂

Hi I need some advice please.....my mum was diagnosed with Alz in January and we are so concerned by how quickly she seems to be declining or does it seem like that to everyone? She also keeps having 'fainting' fits where she takes ages to come round, I witnessed an episode today and it broke my heart. It could have been because she had dressed in 4 t-shirts and a jumper on a hot day I really don't know, she also has sleep apnea so drops off to sleep all and everywhere....the doctors seem to think shes doing really well but all we see is a very sick woman...please someone reassure me 樂

I went to the memory care unit where my mom lives yesterday and we had dinner together. While eating she told me that she just doesn’t feel like eating anymore, she took about 8 bites of her food. 樂 On my drive home I played a song that reminds me of her and bawled my eyes out. 樂 Alzheimer’s is the absolute worst and it’s so heart wrenching. My heart feels like it weighs 80 lbs and truly aches.

Today was the best visit I’ve had with my mom in so long! We laughed a lot and she seemed so much more like her old self. I am feeling so happy and blessed that I got to have a glimpse of my mama back! We even walked in the pouring rain because we both have always found the rain calming and have always loved it! Plus I think my mom looks so cute and happy with her hood on 樂❤樂樂.

It’s officially been one month since my mom moved out of my house and into an Adult Family Home. This disease comes with a wave of emotions and at first I was really sad about it. Sad that I wouldn’t be seeing her everyday, sad that I wasn’t able to provide her the care she needs and just sad that she was even more confused. After about two weeks I can say that she was honestly happier and to a certain degree so am I. My kids and I go visit her about 4 days a week sometimes more. She’s sleeping better, she loves the quiet environment (my house is so loud, we have 5 kids) and she’s around people her age. The woman who owns the house is seriously the greatest about communication and so sweet! She loves being a caregiver. Her nurses that come in are so great with everyone, I’m allowed to be there all day and even into the night. I’ve helped her throw a birthday party for one of the other residents and my mama’s birthday is coming up so her party is next! It feels good to post a happy post! ❤樂 Prayers and love to all of you who are taking care of your loved ones, you are all so amazing.

My mom has been living with my five kids, my husband and I for a little over 2 weeks and I am realizing that I can’t care for her the way she needs. In the last year this disease has made me cry more then everything else that’s every happened to me in my life added up. I constantly feel guilty. 樂 I feel guilty that it’s not working with her living here, it’s so hard on my kids. Especially my 12 year old & my 3 year old. Our house is loud, crazy and so busy. My mom hates it, she gets so mad and yells at the kids. I feel so guilty moving her into an Adult Family Home or into a long term care facility. I feel guilty for wishing I had no kids so I could take care of her the way she deserves...then I feel guilty for wishing I didn’t have kids. Ughhhh 樂樂樂樂樂樂 This disease is the worst hands down!

Tonight is the last night where it’s just my husband my kids and I. Tomorrow my mom moves in and I can honestly admit I have never been more scared. I am scared for literally a million reasons, but this is her only option at this point. I keep telling myself I hope my brain is making it worse then it will be...but I think we all know first hand this disease is literally the most devastating and cruel one out there. I am asking for prayers for strength, patience, forgiveness and sanity for my family and I. Thank you, I know I’ll be reaching out and asking for advice or help along this journey. I love my mom so much, I just hate this disease more then anything. I wish I could have her back! 樂 Have any of you had to take a pet away from your loved one? If so what were some of their reactions?

This is so perfect and this is how I feel ❤樂. I’m sure some of you or all of you can relate to this! Thank you for caring for your loved ones or for caring for anyone fighting this cruel disease! 樂樂樂

This is my beautiful momma and my beautiful baby girl! 樂 The two most important women in my life! It’s been really hard for my daughter (she’s 13) to watch her grandma go through this. They’ve always been so close. I’ve started my daughter in counseling and I see how much it’s helped her, it’s made me want to sign up and see a counselor. Does anyone else see a counselor? Has it been helping you? Thank you!

Has anyone else dealt with C-Diff with their loved one? My mom first was diagnosed with C-Diff on May 17th was treated for 10 days and then shortly after showed symptoms again so then was treated for 21 days. She stopped her antibiotics on Tuesday and her symptoms seem to be back! 樂樂 Yesterday my moms caregiver at the Adult Family Home she lives at let me know my mom had a low grade fever and that she had been scratching her eczema the day before and it seemed irritated. I asked if she was eating and staying hydrated she said yes. She has antibacterial cream and a steroid to put on it (3 times a day EVERYDAY is the instructions) I was just picking my kids up from school (4 of them) and she asks for my moms doctors phone number, I give her the number. She lets me know they are busy. She asks if I want to take her in to urgent care...I ask is there anything else going on? She said well no, but maybe I should take her in. I said well she might just have a virus if it’s a low grade fever. My littlest son had a low grade fever that lasted 4 days before it spiked and he was better. I said I don’t want to rush to the doctor. My FAULT right there. 樂 Her FAULT not explaining my moms HUGE behavior change and that her eczema was SCABBED and hot to the touch! Those were not told to me!!! At 5:30 pm, I ask hey, how is my mom doing? She replied not good, she needs a doctor. I go over there and my moms eczema was not irritated...it was so hot to the touch and there were multiple scabs and painful to the touch. She is so delirious and cannot

I am seriously starting to go a little crazy! 樂 My mom lives in an Adult Family Home! She’s been there since March 11th. Since moving in, she contracted sepsis from scratching her eczema to much. Then she contracted C-Diff for being on such strong antibiotics and not taking probiotics or eating probiotic foods. Now it seems she might have shingles on her arm! 樂 I had to find her a place to live because I have 5 kids, my husband and I own our own business I truly couldn’t give her the care she needs or do everything she needs! I miss my mom, I haven’t seen her in two weeks because I’ve been sick and I couldn’t risk getting her sick with her weakened immune system from being on antibiotics for 20 straight days! 樂 Please please please pray for my mom, I want her to start getting healthy! Or is this how it is...just constantly sickness and illness from here on out? Please send positive vibes and prayers! ❤樂

When your LO gets sick...cold...flu...etc does their side effects from the dementia get way worse? More confused? I ask because in the last 24 hours my mom has been SO much more confused then usual. Sometimes I miss my mom so much and it hits me so hard that I instantly start sobbing and feel like I can’t even move! 樂 I hate Alzheimer’s so much. She was the person I could call and talk to about anything in this world... good, bad, funny, scary, silly, happy...literally ANYTHING! It’s been a year and a half and I have yet to find someone to fill that position. 樂 This group has been so helpful for me because you all know how awful this disease is and it’s comforting to know there are people who understand all that you’re going through. When some of your own family and friends don’t even get it. I hate Alzheimer’s so much 樂, it’s so painfully difficult on every level to watch my 64 year old mom not be able to do really anything for herself. She loses EVERYTHING and then gets so irritated and annoyed and whatever it is that she lost is always right in front of her. 樂 I’m 30 years old; married with 5 beautiful kids and take care of my mom 3-4 days a week. The other days she has nurses that come in. It’s so defeating to know it’s just going to get worse. I believe in God and I pray to him constantly. I know there will be a time when she has to move in with us and I’m terrified I’m not strong enough to do it all. It’s been a rough few days, I’m asking for prayers and positive thoughts for my family & I. Thank you! 樂❤樂樂 My dad can't drive anymore, so his newest obsession is mowing my lawn. Or should I say giving it a crew cut every 3 days! God help me. I am not being patient enough. There are 10 thousand other things my yard needs, like pulling weeds, planting. He doesn't want to do that! I am new to the group. My dad is 81 and has been living with me and my daughter for a month now. I am a teacher that lives out of town during the week and my daughter has a,2 year old and a 7 year old and works full time. We are really struggling. We got his meds on a schedule. We prepare meals and snacks and he has a room of his own with a tv, sound bar, CD player, recliner etc. I cannot quit my job and have to go until May. Our concern is that he still thinks he can drive and has a tight reign on his car keys. He took off last week before the weather turned bad and went home an hour and a half away. He didn't tell anyone or leave a note. How do I approach This? His Drs. were going to call adult protective services if he did not come with us. He has days where he hates it here, and days he is good. We are trying so hard to make things good for him, but he is often irritable . He can't go back to living alone. It is early stages, but he has probably had it for 2 years now. Thanks for letting me vent. This is all new for us.

12:45 in the morning and dad has some shoot em up program on the TV. No hearing aides in, so it can be heard through his door, my door down the hall. I have to work tomorrow. I really want to scream. WTF

My dad has dementia, he lives with me. A week ago my mom who has been divorce from my dad forc40 years , went into the hospital with what she thought was pleurisy. She died tonight of cancer, she was full of it. I used to day how wonderful it was to have my parents this long, when so many of my classmates didn't. I sat with my mom this evening, I played Alan Jackson gospel music for her and told her when she was ready to leave, to go and not worry about us, Jesus was ready and waiting for her,...and Elvis. RIP mom. You lived a very full life, not an easy one, but you were a scrappy broad who loved us.

Last month when my sister took my dad out for the day, it was 1000.00 she got. Today I asked her to take him to the safety because he wanted a pair of boots. His boots cost 150.00. Yet 900.00 was spent. I am moving my dad out of my home as soon as I can. He can go live with her. He called me a jealous bitch when I asked him about it. He complains everyday that he can't afford a hearing aid, then does this. He can't even remember why we fought about it, or who the granddaughter is he bought the stuff for. He claims we think he is crazy when we try to talk to him about his dementia. He is in denial. We have never taken advantage of his finances. He has his own debit card. The only thing limited is the cash pullimit of 200.00 a day. He talks about all this money he has, when he doesn't have it! I cannot do this with my sister anymore. I am done, done done. She can have it all. She has no idea what she is in for My dad has been with my daughter and me for a month and a half. My sister who lives in town has been to see him 2 times. The first time she didn't visit with dad, but my granddaughters. Didn't check out dad's room or ask about anything. Today she came over and then tells my daughter she should have some say in his care too. Here is what is pissing me off: not once on her days off had she, brought a meal over, cane to see dad, taken him out of the house do anything, drive or dinner etc. We have foot the bill out of our own for everything in his room, groceries, added utilities, toiletries, a tv, bed etc. We have not touched his money for anything. Not food, toiletries, nothing. Her and my mom, ( ex wife For 44 years) are so awful to my daughter and me when they have done nothing to help us. We are not trying to keep them out of any loop, or information, in fact the first person we called when dad went missing last night was my sister. Has anyone else dealt with criticism from outside looking in siblings?

I am so angry right now I could smash my fist through a wall! My mom and dad habe been divorced for over40 years. She has always been a gossip and I have tried to maintain my distance from that, while still being a good daughter. I am the oldest and never really stood up to my mom because the repercussions were never worth it. If there is conflict, she is never in the wrong. So now that my dad lives with me, she is best friends with my youngest sister and they had my dad talked into giving my sister his car today! He went to coffee with them this afternoon and he couldn't remember who the lady was that picked him up to go. ( my mother). I tried to tell my mom that he isn't remembering things and she went off on me about my poor sister needing a car. And why am I upset about it. My sister can afford her own damned car! Take advantage of someone with memory loss!!! She took him to lunch last week and he wrote her a check for $1000.00 to fix the car she has. She is a dispatcher and makes damned good money, has no house payment or rent either! She doesn't help my daughter and I with anything regarding dad's care. Meals, shopping, appointments, dog care, dog food, nothing....I just want to scream.

I found out last Thursday my mom has terminal cancer. I drove for 2.5hrs to see her at the oncology unit where she is getting radiation treatment. I took my 82 year old dad, who when he wants to escape, moves like the wind. He putzed along everywhere like we we sightseeing. The second trip into the hospital I was able to park much closer thank God. We went to eat lunch and he asked what the lady's name was, who we had just seen. He doesn't remember that or what is wrong with her. So I am trying my best to keep it together, when I really want to scream! As if my dad having dementia weren't enough, I do I d out my mom has cancer in her lungs, liver and spine. The cancer on her spine is causing nerve damage so she cannot walk right now. I am sick about this news. I haven't stopped crying since I heard.

Dad said today he doesn't remember anything anymore. He has a Dr appt today and he is not happy about having to go. Keeps asking me why he has to. Now that he lives with us, I can see the progression more clearly. I will most likely have to quit my job to stay at home with him, but as a single person, I have no other income. I am praying the VA can help. My last option. I don't want my dad in the rest home here. Their Alzheimer's unit is lock down, and he isn't that progressed. It would be an awful placement. Another row with my dad. My God I cant do this anymore. It sends my brain back to trauma mode from childhood. I want to cry, but can't I am so frustrated and angry. Takes me hours to calm myself back down. Somedays he can be such a fucking asshole to me. Snarky and sarcastic, like I'm one of his 3 ex wives. He Huge fight with my dad. He will not go to the clinic. Swears the blood on the floor in front of the toilet is not his. I have to leave Sunday night to be gone for the week. He will not go to the Dr. I'll try again tomorrow, but he was so awful about it today. He eats nothing I cook, eats cookies and ice cream and drinks a quart of grapefruit juice a day. He is like a little brat in an adult body ! He takes meds, but swears he doesn't. Wits end today! I am having a major meltdown today. My dad is driving me crazy with getting into everything. Like having a 3 year old underfoot. Already this morning. I want to run away from home.

I have read a few posts concerning how hard it is when the appetite and ability to swallow becomes an issue...well here at our house we are there...my MIL went from eating all day long to barely able to swallow..I am the one who feeds her so I had to be pretty creative with ways to entice her to eat. I have to help her swallow sometimes. But it has been so stressful but I was giving her Ensure(the milky kind)but that was getting hard for her to swallow so I researched and found Ensure clear. But I only had 2 flavors and she quickly got tired of them...so I did some more research and found online 2 more flavors and these are Institutional grade or Theraputic nutrition. Whatever that is...but they do have more calories than the other ones. And she actually loves the apple flavor. Here are pics so maybe this can help others with this issue as well. I don't too much post on here...mainly I read and maybe comment if I think I could help in a small way...but tonight I felt the need to get a few things out there...I guess for others and for myself. I have been caring for my mother-in-law for a year and a half...it is my blessing and my honor...even though I had never met her before I love her so much. Well she is declining pretty rapidly...its one thing after another...I'm so stressed out for every little thing...am I doing enough and am I doing it right. Well its this disease...its awful and very ugly. It will have you fooled into a false complacency then tear the rug from underneath you with a new phase of whatever stage they are in. But I love her and I will fight right beside her as long as she can or has the will to. She has been bedridden for almost 6 months now I feed her change her bathe her even help her swallow. I talk to her(she can not verbalize)... i sing to her...I watch tv and videos with her...I hold her hand and especially pray with her. All that and to still know she can't hold on too much longer. I am so stressed. But I will do what I do until the end. I live for her...just to see her smile. God bless everyone out there sorry so long. I just needed to vent

Oh my goodness...as if life isn't stressful enough...we are in the middle of a very bad storm and the electricity keeps flickering. This is definitely not good...my MIL is bedbound and of course we have a hospital bed with an air mattress and an aspiration machine to suction out her mouth to prevent choking. So needless to say having power is a must. We have a generator...I don't know how to use it or if it even has gas in it...sometimes we use my father-in-laws SUV to plug up to in emergencies...he's not home. I'm here alone with her and I'm praying it doesn't go completely out. Heaven forbid her mattress deflates. If she wasn't so frail I would be able to possibly pick her up but that is not an option. Im sorry im just venting. Thank you all for just being there. Its good to be able to do this. God bless We have been told that "Its just around the corner" for the third time. My MIL is and always has been a fighter...well she has been fighting the battle of her life. But I'm so torn between trying to do everything right to keep her alive and praying for her to not have to suffer anymore. She is so frail and weighs less than 70 lbs. She is in constant discomfort...moaning every waking moment...she has trouble with gagging so we have a suction machine. She has pressure sores thats are there due to her skin breaking down. The skin is the biggest organ of the body so basically its failing. I hate to see amd hear her suffer and sometimes I have to just let her moan herself to sleep like a baby. But my FIL wants to keep checking and messing with her thus keeping her awake longer. I'm so torn and really exhausted. Thanks for letting me vent.

I would appreciate some feedback on this please...we have been planning my MIL service as she is declining so rapidly...I want to order some purple ribbons with attached safety pins to put in a bowl on the table where people usually sign the book. I would like everyone to where it for the service to honor the long hard fight we all face with this dreaded disease that takes our lived ones from us. What do you think.

My dear mother-in-law Haydee passed away on 8/5. I had moved from California to Florida to be her caregiver...I am now back in California...but its how I got back here that is the reason I'm posting this...We(my brother-in-law, his wife, and I) did a memorial road trip. It was amazing...we took a picture of her and my honey, her son(he passed 2 yrs ago)on that trip with us and took pictures with the picture everywhere we stopped. What a blessing to honor them in this way.I can't seem to let go of this group.. You all meant so much to me and helped me at the most stressful times. I thank all of you and God bless everyone. Well her fight ended at 3:30pm today. My mother-in-law is with my honey her son in heaven. Hi everyone I know how emotionally, mentally, and physically exhausting we as caregivers can get at times...its only with God that I do what I do. I not only care for but I love my MIL...well my brother and sister in law will be staying with us for a week and is it wrong of me to want them to witness all that I do on a daily basis??? Not for pity or recognition but for them to be able to see what she goes through and has to endure each day. She is sadly not doing too well...she's a fighter though. There is a lot to do everyday and if they can actually see it...it may put things in a better perspective. Well I will keep praying for all of us. God bless

Well my brother-in-law and his wife left back to Vegas yesterday and I had posted before they got here that I wanted them to see all that my mother-in-law has to endure on any given day....well I must say they saw it all. Because whatever could happen did happen... They were both very helpful and much appreciative for all that I do. It was very hard for my brother-in-law to see her in her present state. She is bedbound and is very thin...she knew him though and it was beautiful to see her get happy and excited to see her son. Even though she can't talk he talked to her and held her hand a lot. Its sad because he knows this was most likely the last time he will see her. But it was a visit that was well worth it all. Thank you all for your feedback on my last post. God bless

Hello everyone Thank you for adding me...I came to Florida to help care for my mother-in-law...she is a late stage Alzheimer's/Dementia patient. She has been on in home hospice care for over 1 year. (The whole time I've been here). Well its been a rollercoaster and we were on a good upswing and all of a sudden she is declining and things are getting super tough. I live here with her and my Father-in-law.( my honey passed away 2 years ago) so this has been my entire life since moving out here from California. Its been a journey and I have learned so much. But its getting so stressful now. Its goid to feel like I can have people to communicate with about this that have something in common. Once again thsnk you This morning my husband got up and went for a walk he came back and was trying to change his clothes and looked embarrassed. I asked what was wrong and he said he had a problem that feces was seeping out of him. I thought maybe diarrhea he said no it's just seeping . 5 months ago the doctor said he was mid stage FTD. Is it possible he is starting with incontinence this quickly ? Is this how it happens? I have no experience with this and I hope this isn't too much information . I am concerned , anxious, scared as I am sure he is even more so. I'm trying to act as if it's just a thing so he has some dignity I don't want to make him feel bad on top of it . My husband recently began having "accidents" and is asking for pull-ups more often. It seems in the last week he's had a few more minor incidents. How fast does this disease progress from here? I know everyone is different and timelines aren't the same, but with FTD does it seem to progress more rapidly once it starts like this?

So a week or so ago I was helping my son move furniture back into my living room when the floors were done and I threw my back out and sprained my wrist. It hasn’t gotten much better. Trying to help my husband get dressed trying to bend has not been fun nor easy. Now the frustration sets in and the anger at this disease. I am no longer able or allowed to recover with the constant calls can you change the channel on the tc, oh I hit he button can you fix the tv and he constant shivering and freezing when it’s 73 degrees in the house can you close the windows (I like a good crisp fall morning fresh air) so I am up and down up and down answering to his whims (I’m sorry I’m venting right now-my back is killing me and I’ve spent the better part of my morning doing everything for him and I’m feeling the pressure today) I know it’s not his fault I just can’t help my feelings.樂

My husband has grown extremely close with our familySiberian Husky. Our Tasha is 14 and failing in health. She is having a hard time walking , sitting, and I believe she has cancer. At her last visit a few months ago I was told that I would know when it was time. My 17 y/o sat up with her all nite carrying her in and out to relieve herself. It's now time . I talked to the vet and we are bringing her in tomorrow after work. It's my first experience with losing a dog and it's hitting me very hard -I think because of what is happening with my husband. I'm really concerned with how he is going to handle this. His daily routine has consisted of taking her for walks and spending time with her. It's almost like she knew when he got sick she bonded with him. As my husband's health has been progressing so has Tasha's. My heart just breaks We lost our Tasha to old age in December and my husband reverted back to doing nothing but watching tv. We adopted a rescue dog and she is trained as an emotional service dog. This is Casey - hoping she will bring him some joy .

I don't know how people survive this disease financially. You make too much money yes though barely make your bills every month so you get no assistance. You basically end up penniless and homeless 樂 Has anyone ever done a quit claim deed by themselves? I was told to take my LO name off the house and I haven't done that yet. Money is very tight , I don't have an elder care attorney-saw one who was zero help l. Basically he saw we have nothing left and the house is close to upside down in mortgage so he told me don't worry about others have told me do it NOW! And said to download a form and do it myself - is this

Tomorrow my youngest son Graduates High School it's bittersweet for me. Third and last of my three boys. I had to tell my son that his father wasn't going to be able to make his graduation. The look on his face as he said it's ok I understand just broke my heart. My husband doesn't do well with crowds and didn't think he'd be able to sit there that long (nor do I)my oldest son left for 6 weeks for Air Nat'l Guard and he will miss it also. Then tonite I found out my sisters' cancer has come back. She finds out at the end of the week if they caught it early enough and what the next steps are. Sorry for the long post , I'm just feeling a little numb tonite and don't have anyone to talk to and needed to vent Thank you all for your kind words and support. I took some photos of my husband and my son before we left for graduation and I found out they are videotaping and streaming the ceremony so my husband can get to see it after all. We sat for 3 hours and there was no way he would have made it for 1 let alone 3, and way too many people for him. It all worked out for the best in the end. Turned on the movie "Dying of the Light" with Nicholas Cage. All about a man with FTD. Came across it by accident . Wow, that's all I can say, hits home .

Thank you for adding me to the group. My husband was diagnosed with FTD a little over two years ago at age 57, I am 53 with 3 boys a 20 y/o , 18 and 17. That part is relevant only because I have hard a hard time accepting and dealing with my anger, resentment, at who knows what. I work from home(took a lesser paying high stress job just to be able to take care of my husband). All three boys are in school - next year all three in college, so financially this has devastated us. Yesterday it came to my attention that my 17 y/o has actually been affected a lot more than I thought . There are very few support groups around and he doesn't want to see a counselor. I'm hoping to maybe gain some insight from this group. Thank you again.

I need a moment to vent I hope you don't mind. I spent the day with my LO and my brother driving 2 1/2 hrs ea way to visit my son at college. My brother is opinionated and began grilling me about what I need to do with my older son ---middle son who I'm Visiting comes to my rescue says leave her alone ur stressing her out she doesn't need any more stress ---then brother gets mad--middle son is not wrong. We go to lunch LO has pouted all day. Go to lunch he complains about the burger He was using two knives instead of. Fork and got mad when I corrected him. I learned not to ask what he wants just order after 5 min and him yelling at me. We drop off brother on way home lo says to me I deserve it all of the aggravation I deserve it. We get home my son left garage door open but he was here and lo got mad and started yelling. Then he goes down stairs as my son is working on his jeep and starts yelling and mumbling at hm in front of his girlfriend and yells fu$& u then throws the flag pole downstairs at my son. Need less to say after all this I'm ready to slit my own throat. All I wanted was a nice visit with my son take him to lunch buy him some stuff for his dorm and see his smiling face. Instead I got this mess. I'm so done!

It’s been just over 5 years since his FTD diagnosis and several years prior in the making. Today he turns 61. It’s amazing how he changed just before my eyes. Went from this man who worked endless hours, commuted hours to and from work , side jobs, kids games and some functions to this “child-like” adult that does nothing but sit and watch the same tv shows day after day and does nothing but eat, sleep, and watch tv. He doesn’t like to interact with people as he can’t hold a conversation, he gets agitated easily and gets nervous in public. So very sad. 樂 this disease sucks! Recently my husband has been getting more and more forgetful. Just before thanksgiving we went to breakfast at a diner , something we don’t normally do, as his brother and sister in law were in town and we all went out. I got him dressed-warm thermals, sweats, heavy coat (he is always cold) his hands were shaking I ordered for him and he just sat there with his head down and eyes closed- my son finally got him to start eating as we fed him, then he finally was able to finish. He has been agitated more and more, sits with his forehead in his hand, stands a lot, etc. this morning he got up went into the bathroom and took his bottom clothes off to go he came out all confused and was shivering , I got it of him that he couldn’t remember how to put his clothes back on. I put him In a warm shower and he stood there freezing and shivering visibly shaking and moaning. Took him out of the shower dressed him warm and he came out sat down and started to fall asleep so he went back to bed. Our last visit to the dr he was in mid stage. He seems to be progressing faster now, my other son who came home from college for thanksgiving said he noticed a big difference. My question is this , should I be concerned with the constant shivering and is this going to progress faster now or maybe just a phase cuz it’s winter ? Should I be concerned and take him to the doctor? Can anyone tell me if constant belching a symptom of FTD? My husband has been belching a lot and I'm not sure when it started. I really just noticed lately (the last week or so that he does it quite a bit) I know he can't help it but it's driving me insane. (Sorry I know it shouldn't and I can't help it, I work from home and he sits behind me and that's all I hear . Is there any correlation with frontotemporal dementia and heartburn and burping constantly? I know this sounds impossible but ever since my husband's diagnosis he has had heartburn and burps all the time it drives me crazy? I have a question. Reading posts I see people mentioning Stage 6 Dementia for example-is there somewhere that gives you an idea of the stages? How do you know what stage your loved one is in? I'm sure it differs patient to patient but is there some sort of guideline? ****warning long post*** Feeling like a horrible person. This morning I woke up in a horrible horrible mood! There are days I can handle this but most days I question what the hell am I doing. I'm not liking for pity , others have it much worse I just needed a place to vent I have no one who understands any of this. I don't even understand it all. I work 55-60 hours a week and care for my husband who is 7 years older than myself and just turned 60. He was diagnosed with FTD at 55. Our lives were not perfect before the disease which makes it that much harder. No matter how much I work I can't catch up and I have 3 boys -2 soon to be 3 in college and feel helpless that I can't do for the one that I did for the others before helping with college. Every morning I work out of my house and my husband sits behind me watching reruns of Harry Potter or game shows or car shows . He sits there chattering his teeth cuz he's freezing he chews with his mouth open and I continue to work which has quotas and 99.9% accuracy requirements they watch us like hawks . I am stressed 24/7 365 days a year he won't go anywhere or do anything unless I go he comes to the grocery store with me and makes no bones about showing his dissatisfaction with anything. And I feel guilty for all of it. Had gastric bypass surgery years ago lost 150 lbs and gained back all but 60 of it. Each day I try

~~~warning just needed to vent a moment ~~~I have derailed and derailed and derailed. My life has been nothing short of a huge rollercoaster ride and I desperately want to get off! It's all excuses I know and I know I need to be healthy to take care of everyone else I need to take care of me., I always seem to lose myself. Trying to get three boys financed for college next year, a husband with FTD, working 65-70 hours a week to pay for the bills and said college educations. A dog that is supposed to be a support dog that turned out to be satan's sister and now.. I get a call that my sister's breast cancer has come back and is worse than the first time and it's spread to the lymph nodes. She goes for a full body MRI next week to find out what the next step is and if they caught it or what . They say God doesn't give you more than you can handle, but Lord it's getting heavy down here.

So, my husband & I went to the memory care facility on Friday. He showed his true colors during the assessment. Today I find out they will not accept him. I knew that this could happen, but felt they were able to handle it. My husband said he would find a way to escape. And that's why they won't take him. I'm trying to see it their way, but I'm not sure if it would work anyplace. I better say another Rosary to beg for more patience with him. I can do it, because I have to! I can't handle him, but I guess I'm the only one who can handle him. Please just help us out with a prayer or two. Thanks group!

This damn disease is torturing my husband, who has been placed in a facility for Alzheimer dementia for 28 days. He has called me six or seven times in the first four days. It is tugging at my Heartstrings literally, and I don't know how much longer I can leave him there. Why oh why does this disease exist? What is the point? It serves no purpose! It only destroys innocent people! I don't understand, and I don't want to understand because none of it makes any sense. I just might have to bring him home, and make him happy again. He loves to sweep the patio! He loves to vacuum! God bless him! I miss him so bad I love him so much.樂 My husband has been in respite for two and a half days, & I miss him so much, I'm losing my mind. There are no words that will ease this pain. It hurts him just as much.樂 How can I get the break I need when we are each missing each other so much? This disease is so dam cruel. When is the cure coming? I pray that God will show me the way to function when he returns home to me so that I NEVER need a break again!

Although my husband is in a facility to give me a 28-day break, I feel so guilty that he's not here. Some break! I'm not very good at taking a break! Bottom line is that I don't need or even want this big, long "break"! What I really need is someone to be with him for two days per month from 5:30 a.m. to 6 or 7 p.m. while I take my daughter for her chemotherapy. Long hours, but only twice a month. I mentally am struggling with my hubby being away, although I see him every single day! There are little issues with the facility, but I understand none will be exactly the way I want them to be. Having a break is not what it's cut out to be! Ten more days, and I get to have lo back by my side again. Please pray that my "bank-account-for- patience is full and earning interest"!

My husband is getting more difficult. I called his son to request some help with his dad, and his wife was screaming in the background excuses why they can't help. I finally told him that I didn't want to create a problem for them, & I will figure out what to do. I'm just about at my wits end with his whole d*** family! What do I do? I'm actually a whole lot more calmed down than I was a couple hours ago when his poor- excuse-of-a-family showed their true colors --- worthless human beings that they are! Karma will call on them some day. Thanks for letting me vent!

My hubby started seroquel recently. 25 mg didn't seem to do much. Dr said try 50 mg, and he went wild! Hallucinations, anger, OCD, from 8 pm to 2 am. Next morning dizzy, & chest burning. Gave 1 nitro under tongue, panicked, & I called 911. Anyway, has anyone else had opposite effects from seroquel? P.S. Hospital admitted ran urine & blood tests, heart monitor, & ct scan. He's ok, & came home next day. Gave NO seroquel, that night, & was fine. Gave NONE tonight, & is driving me nuts cause he won't settle down. Grrr! No pattern or consistency yet. Will there ever be? My real question is about others success or failures / results using seroquel. God bless you if you read my lengthy post! 樂樂

My husband keeps moving things around, put dirty socks on top of my desk, tries to use the phone to change channels or turn volume up on tv, a few minutes after his shower he starts taking pj's off so he can take a shower, and the list goes on and on. Ugh! He's driving me nuts. Another meeting tomorrow morning with memory care facility to complete the volumes of required paperwork in order to place him for respite. I need this break so bad. We spent 5 hours in the ER yesterday because he kept getting dizzy, losing his balance, low blood pressure, etc. Bottom line is he was dehydrated. Huh? How does that happen when daily liquids consist of: 12 oz Cranberry juice, 2 Coffee mugs of coffee 2 glasses milk, & 2-3 or 4 16-oz bottles of water every single day! They gave 2 litres of fluids intravenously. I really have tried my best to take the best care I can of him, but it looks like I'm slipping. I need this break so I can be THE best caregiver for my honey again! Prayers requested for our journey! Thanks for listening while I vent again! My husband did NOT want me to leave him at the facility today. Makes me feel like a criminal. My husband is so very angry. Don't know why. It's comfortable in here, but he has worked up a sweat. Working on at least temporary placement so I can get a badly needed break! I am going to miss him, but I can't take care of him any more. Sundowners is hell for both of us. I give up! Ever since my husband was placed in a memory care facility for a 28-day respite stay, I have not been able to bring myself to keep up with my day-to-day normal responsibilities that I was always so adamant about before. Although he's home now, I need a push from you. What is wrong with me? Is this depression? Please don't baby me..... but instead give me a lecture, a scolding, or whatever you see fit to make me "knock it off and stop being so lazy"! You're a great group, and I appreciate you. No hugs, no love, just necessary direction. Thanks. I'm going to try to accomplish a little something now, but will check back later. 樂 So yesterday when he woke up he asked me if we’re having a baby. I’m 66 and he’s 72! I was all ready to head out to the store and found that my keys are missing, They could be anywhere. No doubt Bill put them in a SAFE place. The spare pair is not where I keep them either. Argh! I hate this damn disease!

Does anyone know of an alarm that will chime when a door is opened? I'm not talking about a monitored alarm system, just something that will alert me if my LO sneaks past me out the door. Thanks for your input!

I have heard and read about how sugar can have an impact on brain health which I am totally on board with. My husband is in late stage five and after my sister who is a hospice nurse visited a couple of week ago, she thought he was displaying signs of stage six and that he may need memory car in two years or so. Anyway, the thing is our son who lives with us and helps out with his dad wants to cut ALL the sugar from his diet. I'd like to reduce h;is sugar intake, but at this stage I feel like he may have so little time left I don't want to deprive him of simple pleasures. He doesn't have,nor has ever had diabetes. I'd like to hear from others on this. Thanks! It's an adventure every day. This morning when I woke up Bill was under the bottom sheet!

Over the last ten years or so I had made a habit of saving the greeting cards my husband got for me. Now I just let him choose which one he wants to give me. He came shopping with me and helped me pick out some new summery pajamas and a beautiful hanging plant for Mother's Day. Today at the party, though he just seemed pretty out of it as usual. I don't look forward to what the future has in store for us. Today was the Seattle Walk to End Alzheimer's that Bill and I have participated in the last couple of years. I am feeling really disappointed not to have been able to go since I've got one of the worst chest colds I've ever had which is made worse by the immunosupressive meds I take for lupus. Bill is declining so quickly I wouldn't be surprised if he can't go at all next year. I always post many pictures on Facebook of the walk after the fact as part of my thank you to my donors. I collected over $1100 this year. I'm embarrassed for them to know we didn't even go. We attend various activities at our local senior center for those with dementia. We wanted to get him into a group called The Gathering in which they do stimulating activities for 3 hours once a week that help retain brain function. We went in for an interview with the social worker there which I had the impression was just a formality. She gave Bill the mini-mental exam and he only scored 15 out of 30 and a 20 is the minimum to be in the group. I feel embarrassed that I didn't know how much things had deteriorated for him because he is covering for it so well. Then last weekend was our youngest son's wedding. Bill had been asking many times each day for weeks beforehand when it was. We even went shopping for a whole Saturday afternoon to buy him a suit. Then I am working on a narrative to send to friends and family about my husband Bill disease progression for my fundraising efforts for our Alz Walk next Saturday. I hoped I might get some feedback here before sending it out. Does this sound good, or am I oversharing? "I thought I’d give you an update on how Bill is doing. He has advanced to Stage 5 of Alzheimer’s disease. He reminds me so much of when our boys were preschoolers. He struggles to find the right words to express himself and often makes noises to imitate his environment. He has confusion about dates, seasons and time and is unable to read a digital clock. His spatial reasoning and motor skills are declining. Dressing has become a challenge, including choosing appropriate clothing vs. pajamas. He will ask oddball questions such as whether we’re married and this week if we’re going to have a baby. Bill has lost nearly all short term memory and many long term ones, including his personal history. For the most part he has been able to keep his spirits up by seeing the humor in what’s going on, but when he can’t it can be heartbreaking. This morning he began to cry when he didn’t remember even having one of our grandchildren. We are lucky to live where there are programs that can help him at our senior center including a song circle. There is a respite program he attends once a week that provides stimulating activities. I feel especially blessed that our adult son, Sean, is living with us, providing me with additional respite when More and more you can see the progression of Alzheimer's in the photos of Bill. This was on his 72nd birthday on Sunday. Yesterday he had a vague recollection about his birthday and asked me when it was, thinking it was that day. What are the losses from you LO's Alzheimer's that affect you the most? What are the things you dread in the future? My husband is so funny he try to get dress and look what he did. I love him so much. For trying. Hello I do not know what stage my husband in but I’m losing it. He will pick up the trashcan and pee in it. And put his shit in the sink. Awww what do I do. Help please

Ever since my sister passed on the 30 of Aug 2017 my husband stays in bed and is alway asleep. I tried to get him up and he will not get up. Today he will not eat. I gave him a protein drink so he would get something in. He only wanted a little bit. He had lost weight again we want to the dr yesterday. What am I to do.

My husband is talking to his self and seeing people . Should I just let him do this or tell him no one is there.

This is my husband and Candy She is his emotional support dog she helps him all the time. When he had fell in his room she came and got me when his sugar was high she came and got me I love this dog and I love this man for the rest of my life yes he may have all time is in dementia but when we got married it was for better for worse for sicker for poor till death do us part and that's exactly what I'll be I love you baby I’m going to do this I have to go to the hospital and I have to take my husband with me I just hope he doesn’t walk away. I’m just in to much pain right now. Wanting on the bus.

I need to ask My husband is sleeping all the time for the last two days. What is going on. And he keeps saying he wants to go see his mom she is in heaven what do I say to him. And is sleeping all that time okay Today my husband can to me and said Baby I’m not going to be here much longer so take care of yourself. I told him I’ll be here until the end and I love him. He tells me this more and more. I say when God is ready for you I’ll be there. This is my husband he is the love of my life. He has Alzheimer’s but today he doing good. My husband had so much fun . Hello I have a question I take care of my husband with Alzheimer's and Dementia he is 78 next month he will be 79. Will he been asking to see his kids but they will not come over they say they do not have the time. My kids before we got married come some times. He has one step Dar that comes when she can. But his biological Dar said she coming and do not he stay up all day for her. He lets me know he not going to live long to 80. I do not know what to do. I try talking to her but she still says the same things I be there.

I want to say I’m sick of this daycare that my husband goes to. I can no longer let him go there it hurts me to much to see him come home so wet and cold. I think I’m done. He can stay home with me all the time This hut me so much I know it happened but It really hurts. Im doing this all by myself and I feel like a house just felling on me. He does not know how i am and I am his wife. My husband forgot my name. He hide his food to make me think he's eating all of it he does not drink a lot I'm a little worried about that what can I do. The doctors are telling me this is part of the dementia and all timers so don't worry about it. It hurts a lot but I keep telling him who I am. Is this the right thing to do. My Mom, suddenly gets better, starts eating like with so much hunger, she knows things, but doesn’t last to long, is this normal?

A person who is very confused, but still reads, and still recognizes family members, she also says things that are not true, things that she says somebody tells her. What level would you rate this person? Hi, I need help! I don’t know what to do with my Mom, she is a 89 year old she has suffered for Hiperactivity disorder, bipolar and personality disorders, she was living in a nursing home, since December, she has taking like 7 falls in this place, the last one was so terrible she fracture bones on her face, first they send her to the mental unit, then her Doctor said that he order to take care to a medical floor to take care of the fractures, now I don’t want to send her back in the nursing home, so I think I found one closer to my home to keep in eye on her and help her more! My concern is that my mom refuses to live in this places and she does everything possible for the CNA no to like her, even now in the hospital she calls them fakes, she hates every nurse, and she continue to try to get up with out help! So I am afraid the same thing is going to happen over again in this new place! They told me that my mom needs one an one all the 24 hours and they can provide that ! She only has medical and they don’t pay very much! My mom still remembers who we are, I try to talk to her about being positive about her care, she just gets mad! It is so frustrating! Please help! 樂樂 My Mom, she will be missed very much, but her soul his in peace! ♥樂樂❤樂樂樂樂 With much love to all of you Angels! You are very much appreciated ! ❤樂樂♥樂樂樂樂樂樂

I am very sad, to see the way they treat the elders, in the Nursing Homes. My Mom is been in one for almost a year and four months. She has taken numerous falls, the latest one was that She got her hand crush in the opening of a door, she broke two fingers and her nails were taken out by the crushing of the hand.樂 I have called the Protective Service for the Elders, the give me the number of the Oldsters I am not sure if this is expelled right, anyway this is the person that cares for my Moms Nursing home, she went there and talk to my Moms place, and in the end she end up defending the place! She broke her left hand, and now the only hand she could move it was crash! Any ideas? I am so frustrated, I don’t have a place to take my Mom! 樂樂 This are pictures from just three of her injures, I have like other seven times! 樂樂

My mom is seeings things that are not there! Like she acuses her Caregiver of inviting her boyfriend and them being naked in the bathroom! I was just there in the Nursing home and her caregiver was given a bath to my Moms roommate and also was and other CNA male helping her! Does anybody had this experience? I ask the CNA and they said they never had any patient behaving like Mom! 樂 I went to see my Mom, I saw how devastating is this illness, she looks so old, i brought her favorite food, she usually eats what i cook for her, this time she turn her face away, when I try to feed her! I find myself tonight having a panic attack, the worse part is that I know she is really depressed, being in that awful place, I try so hard to get Caregivers and It was not possible for her to live alone! I am hurting for her so much! I Does anyone had experienced your love one acting like a baby? My started to behave so strange, yesterday, she was calling her Mom and making noises when my niece try to give her meds. I never seen her like this. Anyone? 樂 I have a question, my Mom is getting very confused, the other day I went to visit her she is now living in a nursing home, one of the nurses was taking her to her room, and when she saw me she told me they are arresting me! So sad, because she was really scared! Anybody experience this before? Please share. Why is it when you talk or call them they look in s completely different way Dad's last fall, Staples in his head. Don't know how many more falls I could také

Duz anyone have a parent that seems to be always falling. My dad fell at least 5 time yesterday. We are thinking about getting him be a wheelchair for around the house. Input please

We Are try to find a pad that you put on the floor by the the bed and it will go off when they get up at night Any suggestions Is there an estimate on how long someone lived with this. Is it heritage Can anyone tell me if dementia and or Alzheimer's is hereditary Well dad passed last night. I feel an empty void. He will be missed but will be with his loved ones on the other side. Hopefully I'll marry someone like him. Thanks for all your support Well dad is in the hospital day 3. The saddest thing is to see the paramedics take him screaming in pain. Once they get him stabled they will transfer him to palative care with the VA. The stress and drama. Love you dad Papa is in hospice now. Not only do we have to deal with Alzheimer's with my dad we found out he has brain damage do to poor circulation. There's no winning. I miss being daddy little girl, his princess

I know there are 3 and 7 stages. Could someone tell me what stage the anger comes in. Very fustrating I'm concerned, the last 2 days my dad has been breathing hard is that a sign? He has been shaking his hands too. Is it possible to have Parkinson's with Alzheimer's I dont know how i did it. My dad was in one of his grumpy moods. Some how i was able to get him out. He even laughed. Duz anyone have tricks to share Oh wow, dad has now got to the angry stage. I don't like it My dad is now going thru his anger stage. Don't know how to handle it. I know it's not but I always get upset. How do you all deal with it

Can I get help please . I brought my mom home a few weeks ago and everything in my home changed plus my 23 year old son has his 2 year old son for a week . My husband is wanting to stay away from home and my home is a wreck . I'm going through menopause and since my mom moved in my health has declined even more . My mom goes to bed at 11 and is up by 5 I wait on her all day and I can't even get any help . I upset because my son room is a mess and he doesn't even clean up after his son . I can't even leave home to go to the grocery store because it's so cold and my mom is very cold nature . I just want to leave my home and go live with her in her apartment who I suppose to turn the keys in on the first . When you are caring for a love one day in and out the ups and down the stress and sleepless nights you feel you can’t take much more and then you think about if I put them in a facility and they don’t take care of your Love one only what they know they have to do to not get in trouble that seems so cold and unfair to spend your ending of life like that . But then what if they go and they like it and do better with having more people to take care of them and as a daughter you can visit and enjoy your mom more . I wish I knew what would be best . My mom has medicade and medicare and she has dementia, i have been told she can only get 20 hours of caregiving a week paid by medicare but she needs more care than that she has late stage dementia .Does anyone know how I can get more pay for caregiving so I can leave my job to take care of my mom?

My mom moved in with my brother a few weeks ago and now she is crying to everyone she wants to come back and live with me .No one helped me when I had her and my brother had 5 people and he cant handle it . What should I do and a nursing home is not an option at this time ?

It is now at the point that my mom has to leave her home . I have went against doctors for 2 years . The problem is mom can't really do much for herself and she wants to stay in her apartment but we have to have someone coming bye 2 times a day . The home health care companies for Medicare are very unreliable and inconsistent. I know my mom will be so sad but all my siblings have gotten worn out and don't want to do anymore caregiving . Her income is very little monthly and me leaving my job will cause less in come for my family . I just don't think I can bear to see her in a nursing home not from what I see . Those people will not love and care for her like me , but I'm worn out too. I ask God to please give me strength and I feel like he wants us to look after our parents when they are ill . Please any advice?

I feel like no matter how much I do my mom will end up in a nursing home. Its to much for one person , Taking Mom to church this Morning she has been going for 50 Years .

My mom has been on Loritab for 7 years,she also has dementia and cant remember when she last took a pill .My mom lives alone and has caregivers 2 times per day for a couple of hours . I have had her medication halfed ,up the dose .lower the dose .and hid the medication due to family memeber taking it also has to make a police report .Last night my sibling went to my moms and took out pain med for this week and gave her extra .I left my mom house crying and wanting to give up .I have been dealing with this addiction for 7 years and it has cause alot of problems because all my mom seems to care about is if she has her pain medication. All of the siblings (4) has been in arguments over this and my mo talks behind my back because im trying to keep her safe.

My mom has been with my brother for a month now ,and i have always been her primary caregiver for years even before dementia and me and my brother are not on speaking terms now . Even though my mom wanted to come back to me and I would have taken her back but now I feel like I just need help with getting through the grieving process of not being her caretaker now . How many of you are the Primary caretaker of your love one without help from family ? My Mom has a pressure sore from sitting so long,she is being treated by a doctor,was wanting to know if any of you have dealt with that and what would be a good pillow to buy? Thanks I found this company and I ordered my grandmother a new bra (she hasn’t worn it yet so I don’t know if she likes it) however there are some clothing items that my be beneficial to my fellow caregivers. They have a website. The catalog came with her order. This morning we had a first.... Grandmother gets dressed and comes into the living room and my stupid self asks her “Are you going to wear the same clothes as yesterday?” Boy she was mad and told me they weren’t the same clothes and I shouldn’t be trying to make her crazy! I just said “oh I thought they were the same” Tried to play it off and make it my mistake but she is still stuck on it. 樂樂 ♀樂 Hopefully after a trip to town she’ll forget I even said anything! Time to buy multiples of clothes I suppose.

Question: How did your loved ones deal with moving and getting rid of some of their things? My grandmother is moving in with my husband and I in a few months when her addition to our house is complete. She will have her own bedroom, bathroom and living area. The area is quite large so she is getting to keep the majority of her furniture. I'm getting rid of my dining room table so she can keep hers. I want my house to feel like her home when she moves in. My issue is she has multiples of things that aren't needed but won't part with them. For example she has 15 lamps I explained to her she will only need 5 for her new area but she wants to keep all 15. Same thing with water hoses. Do I just pack all these things and store them or do I have her sell them in her garage sale now? She is in the beginning stages of dementia but need supervision. Thanks for the input and guidance. I got my grandmother signed up for the adult day center. I cried when I left the office. I know it’s the right decision because she cannot stay alone while I’m at work anymore, but it made me sad because we are to this point. I miss the woman that she was when I was growing up.

Needing advice: my grandmother is in the early stages of dementia, she’s very independent and can do most things on her own with guidance. She doesn’t think she needs help with a lot of things so we pretty much have things “dementia proof” at our house except the thermostat to the air conditioner. We have two separate thermostats in the house. One controls the air and heat in her rooms and the other is ours. We purposely had a separate air conditioner installed for her so she could be warm without my husband and I sweating to death (we live in Texas) our problem is she will get hot while vacuuming and turn the thermostat down to 60F then she’s complaining she’s cold and wearing a sweater. I know they make plastic lock boxes to go over the thermostat but I would like something else to restrict access to it so she still thinks she has the ability to control it. Do they make thermostats that you can lock but will allow you to still push buttons? This may be helpful for caregivers. If your loved one is still living alone or likes to check the mail. It sends you notifications and pictures of the mail so you know if something is missing. My grandmother doesn’t usually check our mail but I signed up just in case. I know that we are getting a phone bill and a Christmas card delivered today.

My grandmother had a birthday today. Big 80 she really enjoyed her party. Her friends she’s had for nearly 60 years were able to make the trip and see her. It was a good time for her reminiscing.

My granny with her plant my dad sent her for Mother’s Day. She said “what did I do to deserve this” 樂

My grandmother and her Easter bag she received at the Day Center. She loves candy! I encourage caregivers to look into sending their loved one to a day center if available. She didn’t want to go at first but I made the final decision and it has been a positive experience for us. This is geared toward kids obviously but it may be helpful for some of our LO if it’s changed to their specific schedule. I personally haven’t tried it but thought I would share. Found this at Hobby Lobby, it’s 15 mini puzzles shaped like birds. May be easier for our LO to put together than one single large puzzle. I am waiting for an answer from our alzheimers branch here in winnipeg. my husband told me this afternoon to say hi to his dad(deceased) and to bring him with me when I come to visit. I said ok. This has left me speechless. i am having a hard time accepting my husband is not the same anymore. Yet, when he is clear he sounds the same. When I visited him on Monday, his eyes opened wide in delight and surprise. He said "i have a visitor!" I don't think he knew me at first but after a few minutes it clicked in. He was very sad while I was there. When I left, I took both his hands and sqeezed real tight. He took each one and kissed my hand. I didn't want to go.

My husband has entered the second phase of the dementia. He calls out all the time asking for HELP and HELLO. He also makes a groaning sound or moaning sound all the time. He is on clonazapam twice a day and now has been put on risperidone twice a day. His short term memory is gone. He doesn't remember how to use the phone etc. What has been your experience with "risperidone? What else should I expect? I wish I could actually talk to Murray. We had a skype call this morning. He is so distracted. We could not even have a conversation. It is so sad. Now he is unable to go out for lunch outings with the other residents because of his washroom situation. This is even more sad. He needs a hoyer lift to get him up and into the wheel chair or on the toilet or into bed. I am so LOST!! My husband lost his battle on February 27th. Complications were septassimia from Febrary 12th. We were called to the hospital on February 23rd to say good by. He hung on till February 27th when he left this earth. It is still so very hard to accept. it does not seem real. I will miss you and love you always Murray. You are in my heart. bettie My husband's dementia is advancing. The CHF is also but stable. My daughter feels the dementia will take him before the CHF. Is she right?????????

My daughter has laid a guilt trip on me. I visited with my husband today. He just sat there. Very dopey Only one word answers. He is confused. There are not too many clear moments. I thought it would be best to take his wallet home with me and his apartment keys. I left a message for the unit coordinator about my idea and she forwarded to the triage nurse or unit nurse of the day. This nurse told me to go ahead and take the wallet. I could not find the keys but she found them. Where I don't know. I showed my husband the wallet and the keys because I was taking them home. He seemed upset when I showed him the keys. His brown was knitted together. He did not say anything. My daughter says I should not have shown him anything. Now he knows he is not coming home. She says he was crying iniside. I felt like I was stealing without telling him. He could have a clear moment and look for these. He is in adaptive pants now which do not require a belt. When I asked him if he knows where his wallet is he said no. It was a good thing I checked his drawer as it was unlocked. There was a whole bottle of gaviscon in there besides his wallet. DID I DO A BAD THING????????? I visited my husband mothers day. he smelled bad. his clothes were not clean. i sent a e mail to the nurse manager. i included the ceo and the director of care. i got chastized by the ceo because we had an agreement for me to only e mail my concerns once a week. they cant keep up with my vm's and the second e mail. did i not have a right to bring this to their attention on monday. why should this keep until the following friday??? I have been very unhappy since falling out with the nursing home. All I did was ask a very reasonable question: "what does daddy do all day". This was for my daughter. Then at the end I asked "what does Murray do all day". I got slammed so hard that I have been crying for days. I also was maligned in this weekly e mail. There were untruths about me phoning the nurses all the time asking a ton of quesitions despite the e mail agreement between the director, the ceo and myself. None of this was true. I have now been relegated to try and call Murray in his room. I don't know when they put him to bed. I see him only once a week. What does it hurt to allow me to say a few words to him. He has forgotten how to use the phone. Somebody has to do it for him. I cant even call to ask how he is doing. I was told I will be called if there is something I need to know. Boy, do I want to make a lot of noise about this. But I am afraid of the fall out on Murray if I do. In the meantime, I am sick with gastritis all week. I lot twenty lbs in a year. Now I don't know what I can and cant eat. My daughter says "mother dial down the stress". She just doesnt understand how I feel. Mydysphasia:does heart is very anybody sad today know My husbandanything hasabout gone this? into late stage dementia. He no longer talks to me on the phone. The nurse brings him to the phone. He says, hi, what's new? but does not respond. He says he can't He does not use cutlery anymore to eat. He uses his hands. The staff dont say anythig because they want him to eat. The staff fill in for the stuff he can't pick up. I tried talking with him on skype. His attention span visited my husband. he has started yelling for "help" " burning" "help" for the last week and a half. He would not stay in the concert yesterday asking to go back to his room. I found a HCA to take him back. Once in the room, he started again. I am sitting right there. I tried to find out what was hurting. He said "I dont know" or it is "everything". He would grimace first trying to handle the pain and then proceeded to yell for help. I told him to stop it because he is scaring me. The call bell by thistime had been ringing almost five minutes and nobody came in. When he quieted I had phoned my daughter to wake her up. When I got her on the phone, he started again. She claims there was three seconds of silence before I talked with her. She blasted me for doing this to her. I said I didn't plan this. Even last night at 9 pm she asked again why I did this, We began sniping at each other. Even asking the nurse, she doesn't know. Every time they ask him he says a different thing hurts. They cant keep pumping him full of pills. I asked for them to do a pee test. He also has CHF. I wonder if it is from the heart. I have nobody to talk to. Everybody is on holidays. I am reaching out to all of you. HELP! thank you for welcoming me to your group. My name is Bettie. My husband has demential which is progressing. I visited Murray yesterday. I thought he knew it was me Bettie but when I left he asked me about the house Dad and I bought if it has 4 rooms. I told him I am not Mum. I am Bettie. I did not buy a house with Dad. He said "you didn't". Dad is in his own house. I am in an apartment. I really donit know if he knew it was me. I tried calling him last night to talk some more but couldn't get him on the phone. DID HE KNOW IT WAS ME? I gave him his Fathers Day card when I came in. He could not read it. He thanked me up and down for coming and making Fathers Day special. But he did not refer to me by name. I am still troubled by my visit with him. How does one handle/cope with your spouse having a significant personality change? His behaviour had to be managed with respiridone so he can converse and participate in activities without yelling? How does one cope? Sign me sad. Bettie I'm trying to find respite care for my mom. I did it recently but it was expensive. Anywhere else maybe not so expensive. Thank you My mom keeps flushing the utensils down the toilet. What can I do??? Can Sundowning occur in the morning? My mom won't take her meds. I can't put it in any food cause she won't touch it. ... I'm done at this point 樂樂樂樂樂

I'm going to take my mom's phone away. any suggestions. she's called my sister 50 times yesterday How can I tell what stage of dementia my mom is in. Do I have to ask her Dr. ? I'm thinking of giving up. I'm just tired of all this. I'm done at this point. I can't think straight. I'm so tired physically mentally, I want to pack up and move away. I'm done getting no help. I just don't want to be around my mom anymore I'm so done with my LO I'm having caregiver burnout any suggestions how to cope ? Thank you

Well just found out mom has Alzheimer's... God help me. The reason why I say this cause I'm doing it alone. A feel good post. For those that remember my Dad's obsession with toilet paper and always saying someone stole his toilet paper, well Charmin Forever roll to the rescue. He loved it!!! Have any of you ever had a LO sent to a Geriatric Mental Facility? My Dad attacked my Mom again last night, police were called. He's now being held separately and as you can see we're resting, waiting on them to come get him. When he does this it's because she doesn't remember him and bc he has Alzheimers as well he doesn't understand. Hopefully they can get his meds straight and he can come back. I'm afraid this will be the end of them. They've never been apart. Sorry so long I'm exhausted and have cried so much today. I'm new to this group. My Mom has MS and Alzheimer's and my Dad has always been the primary caregiver. My sister and I started noticing some forgetfulness and agitation with my Dad about 6 months ago. My Mom was in and out of the hospital 9 times since June. Mainly minor things but the hospital discharged her to a nursing home for rehab and we ended up talking Dad into staying there too because he was going and getting her in the middle of the night and just taking her out AMA 樂 ♀樂. So they were doing pretty good there and we were up visiting and checking on them every day. Well one Saturday there was a birthday party and my Dad snuck out, hitchhiked home, got his car and went back and snuck Mom out. So now Adult Protective Services are involved. We have home health set up but honestly it's not enough and I can't force them into going back into a nursing home. The main issue is their medication. They don't take it right and get mad when we help with it. Mom is supposed to be cath'd 4 times a day, never happens. I take Dad to get results tomorrow from tests at the Neurologist, I really hope he has some answers. They don't want anyone living with them, they won't live with us and my Dad is still driving. Sorry such a long post. I'm just so spent mentally with them. I quit my job to help take care of them and I also have a new 2 month I'm so thankful for all of you! This has been a journey and one that I hope doesn't end soon. My Mom has MS and Alzheimer's and my Dad, who has always been her caregiver now has Dementia. They were in a nursing home but Dad snuck them out and now Adult Protective Services is involved. Anyway, here we are 2 grueling months later and tomorrow we're finally moving them into a different facility more suited for their needs. Dad is ready, I think he sees he is no longer able to care for them but Mom can't see it because she's in another time, with her Alzheimer's. She's so frail and barely eats. She isn't getting her meds like she should and today I was looking for something and went in the bedroom and there on the floor was poop, like she got up from bed, pooped and kept walking. I'm so hoping tomorrow goes good and this works. I'm exhausted from the many trips to their house to check on them and the meetings with social workers, home health and APS. I love them dearly but can't do this alone. I have a sister but she is a school teacher so I end up with it a lot which is understandable. I hate this disease. Sorry, really just venting.

Yesterday was my parents 59th wedding anniversary and their first in the nursing home. They have a tradition of eating a burger and a shake on their anniversary, that's what they ate on the night after they got married. I keep my 1st granddaughter on Monday and Wednesday and it's an hour and a half drive away. Anyway, I couldn't stand it so I went and picked her up, we got their burgers and shakes and here's the picture. She was so good and interacted with them for over an hour which is pretty good for an 8 month old. My parents didn't remember it was their anniversary nor could they keep it straight of who's baby she was but they enjoyed it none the less.

I know you guys are not my God and my jury but on stressful days do you think it's ok to know answer my Dad's calls? He and my Mom are in a nursing home due to her MS and Alzheimer's and his Dementia. She was in and out of the hospital about every other week and lost a ton of weight. She was in rehab from a fractured pelvis due to a fall and he snuck her out. This got adult Protective Services involved and after review they are forced to be in a "lock down" facility. For the most part things are good and I visit 3-4 times a week and my sister 1-2. Anyway, sometimes he will go off on tangent and call me over and over about going home, which will never happen. Usually I talk him down but I wonder with his demented memory if for my sanity I would be better to not take every single call. I end up feeling so rude and disrespectful for not answering. I'd appreciate your comments.

Guys! I don't know how you that are caretakers 24/7 do it. My Dad calls me 20 times a day asking when I'm coming to take them home which will never happen because adult protective services says they have to stay in a "lock down" facility. I go up there and see them about 4 times a week and my sister the other days. I took their laundry yesterday and Dad called me angry that Mom has no clothes. I have a small load, now in the dryer, it's mainly his clothes. I know I'm gonna get up there and she has plenty of clothes. Ugh! She hides stuff. She has Alzheimer's and he has Dementia that is escalating so fast. Sorry, just venting.

My parents house has become cluttered with paperwork from visits to the hospital and nursing home. I think the paperwork clutter is confusing them. I'm wondering if any of you have any tips on how to get rid of it without setting them off. I was thinking maybe get a little cardboard filing cabinet and telling them I'm just organizing it for them and see how that goes. They have old medication lists and I have noticed this confuses them when I'm filling the box. That will be one thing that's gonna be hard to get out of their hands. My Mom has started having these spells where she doesn't know who anyone is. She said my Dad looks just like her husband but that's not him. Are we moving to a next step? Both my parents have Alzheimer's and are in a facility. My Mom is much more advanced and has started having periods where she will not know who my Dad is and then wants to be away from him. Because he also has the disease he doesn't understand and gets upset. For now they can give her meds to calm her down, she naps and wakes up with no memory of the incident and neither does he. I'm just wondering how long until she doesn't come back from not knowing him or us. Most of the time it's just him she doesn't know but sometimes she doesn't even know who she is.

So both my parents have Alzheimer's. My Mom also has MS. So my mom sometimes has these spells where she doesn't know my Dad. They are in the nursing home. When this happens they usually put her in another room. My Dad always assumes she is with another man. So this happened the other day and he hit my mother several times. I'm out of town but even though I know it's the disease I'm so angry at him. He has no memory of it. Neither does my mom. I'm going to put a camera in their room on Wednesday when I'm back in town and the dr is upping their Xanax. I wish I could past the fact that my Dad hit her ugh!

Sorry, long post alert! So my Mom had an episode this morning. She has MS and Alzheimer's. Usually she can only walk a few steps with the aid of her Walker. So she didn't know who my Dad was and was being very mean to him. Told him to get blankety blank out of her room. So my Dad who has Dementia gets upset because he forgets she has Alzheimer's. She tells him she has a boyfriend. So Dad calls me and I run up to the nursing home hoping to calm the situation down. I get there and Dad is pouting because she's hurt his feelings and Mom is walking out of the room to get away from him with her Walker. Ok, so this usually frail little woman walks with her walker all the way to the front of the nursing home, a long way. All while telling me she has no clue who my Dad is because there were so many around that time 樂. So my question is 1) do they sometimes have strength they normally wouldn't and 2) does it give them an alter ego? She's usually sweet as pie and they were high school sweethearts and are usually inseparable. I got her back on track for now and they were being sweet and I talked to my Dad about the disease and that was all it was. Funny for the day: my parents are in a nursing facility, Mom has MS and Alzheimer's and Dad has Dementia. Dad calls me, very apparently angry. Someone stole the extra toilet paper out of his room. Yup, toilet paper. He doesn't like that they don't leave extra rolls in his room so I bought him a 4 pack to have spare lol. I got him another 4 pack and took it up there. Obviously he threw a big fit to the staff because they all warned me on my way to their room lol. By the time I got there he knew something was taken but couldn't remember what lol

I just want to say a big thank you to this group and whoever it was that suggested washing mothers hair like this. We have gone from a crying nearly hysterical woman when we tried to wash her hair in the sink to her telling me how great the warm water (the wash cloth) and my scrubbing her head with the shampoo feels. And even if it drips on her face she just laughs and asks for a towel. Love it! ok I'm fairly new to this primary caregiver position - today was hair washing day and it did NOT go well - a home health care worker came in to do it and she and my niece kept ASKING my mom to do things - can you lay down so we can wash your hair (in the inflatable thing like they used at the rehab center) - no. can we go to the kitchen sink to wash your hair - no. can we go to the bathroom to wash your hair - no. I'm thinking you just TELL her this is what we're going to do and do it! wouldn't that be easier? maybe not easier but quicker? it took two hours to get her hair washed and she cried for most of the time. YAY!!! we got her on the scale tonight and she weighs 91.8#! in rehab less than two months ago she was only 78# - so happy!!! I'm new to this page - looking forward to the interesting tidbits and helpful knowledge y'all have. This is my beautiful mother enjoying "the neighbors" (my sister and her family) cows. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer's several years ago and no longer knows who I am. I miss her! The her I remember...... such a sad disease! Got a smile out of her tonight! Even after another fall earlier tonight which thankfully she didn't get hurt and thanks to the Alzheimer's she doesn't remember it! tonight as I was helping her get ready for bed she showed me a wedding picture of her and my dad - he died she told me - and now I have no one - no children or anyone. I just assured her I was here for her and I love We're making progress. When I got home tonight she (my mother) told my niece "she's the one who comes here all the time" - at least she remembers that! 樂

Not getting any response to my previous question about what you could expect to pay a full time live in caregiver so I'll ask this. Does anyone know what a nursing home facility costs? My mother is in northern Minnesota. I know the cost probably depends on care needed but can anyone give me any idea?

Mother has suddenly taken a turn for the worse and is bed bound. Sweet kitty came and found her! it's like having a child again - if it's too quiet you have to go look to see what they're getting into.... can anyone out there recommend a doorway alarm system that will reach like 500 feet to my sister's home? mother was out this morning in 37 degree temps in her stockings - no shoes - we need to know whenever she leaves her home Ok I have a question. Living in Minnesota with my mother. My sister has medical POA and is leave on a ten day vacation. If something happens to my mother while my sister is gone what will the hospital or clinic do if I have to take her in and I have no POA? my mother is in a rehab facility after taking a fall and breaking her hip a couple weeks ago. This morning the facility called that they found her on the floor in front of the bathroom. She doesn't appear to have re injured her hip or to be hurt further they said. She doesn't remember that she broke her hip or why she is there - my question is how do we keep her from getting up when she gets home? I will be moving home at the end of the month to live with/care for her for the next year and this makes me very nervous! they told us today that my 87 year old mother weighs a mere 78 pounds. She was 5'7" before - weighing around 130-140 pre-Alzheimer's - how do I get her to eat more? what can I feed her? she eats like a bird… When my father was alive he was a minister. I am now caregiver for my mother who is stage 6 Alzheimer’s. Lately when my sister takes my mother to church she ends up crying and she has to bring her home. So sad. Church was always such a big part of her life.

Telling my mama I loved her and saying goodbye just moments before she took her last breath last night. She’s in heaven now with my daddy!

Arrived a couple of days ago to begin a year of living with and caring for my mother who has mid to late stage Alzheimer's. She fell and broke her hip last month and someone has to be here full time with her now. She doesn't know who I am really but she can still play that harmonica! sadShe day....mystill remembers sister and how brother to snap never green even beans! came to visit Mother today...my nieces and nephews never even came to say Merry Christmas to Grandma...and they live right next door. I guess she doesn't know so it doesn't matter...... My niece is my mothers primary caregiver. Mother still lives at her own home which is in my sister's yard on the farm and my niece comes in daily to take care of her. She is truly heaven sent! I don't know what we would do without her. She has been with my mother for over a year now. She has the patience of a saint and is always so upbeat! She sends us "sweet grandma" email updates weekly. Here's an excerpt from this week. "On our way over to Dad's place for lunch one day, Grandma turned to me and asked, "Where are you going?" Teasingly, I replied, "I'm going where you're going. Where are you going?" We laughed and then she said, "Well, that's okay. You can come. You're my baby, my good child." Thank you, Grandma!"

My 87 year old mother took a fall and broke her hip. She is understandably very confused and in a lot of pain. My sister and brother are with her still in the emergency room since 10:00am. They say the hospital is full and they are waiting for a room to open up. I'm feeling very far away....樂 she is in Minnesota and I live in Texas but am in Arkansas right now on vacation. Waiting to hear more news. Appreciate your prayers

They just called. Again. Mother fell again at the rehab center. She fell and broke her hip three weeks ago today. Now she has fallen twice this week at the rehab nursing home. They still plan to send her home next week on Tuesday. Very scary to be the one responsible for her when she's falling so much! The entire day today and even now at 10:40pm from her bed my mother has been singing/chanting/humming sometimes mixed with laughter sometimes crying. She’s never done this before. I mean it’s been literally NONSTOP! Mom doesn’t particularly enjoy eating nutritious food so after dinner I give her dessert and she devours it. If she knew were the sweets were she would eat them all in 48 hours. Today mom drank all the coffee creamer in the middle of the night and left almost 1/2 a gallon of milk from the refrigerator in kitchen and left it on top of her refrigerator in her room. Rejoice in their life, that they had a good one. They are angels watching over us, out of pain. They may be not here but they are happy.

Thanks to all of you! I just called a hospice facility and my mom would qualify. Just more paperwork, lol. Went to a Hospice facility today. Really nice actually. Going to go one step at a time. Tomorrow someone will be coming in to see mom. Thank you all for your info!

Can someone tell me how respite works, does someone come to house or does LO go somewhere? Sometime last night mom unplugged her tv and camera in her room. Oh ok what about anger when there are toddlers in the house? Or she picks one up and she’s been deemed high risk for fall. I’m sorry I have all these questions. Fixed LO breakfast this morning before work, woke her up to let her know and to eat. Left at 11am, when I got home at 4pm it’s still sitting there untouched. Any caregivers suffering from severe stress? Just called Medicare and to qualify for respite hospice dr and regular doctor must certify she has 6 months to live

I’m glad my children have such wonderful memories of my mom. For me it wasn’t the same, she tried to give me to my paternal grandparents at 11 and succeeded in my uncle and aunt taking me instead. I was lucky to have them. The were the most loving people. The have passed and I miss them so much, they were who I went to in times of need. I moved back with my mom at 15 and raised myself from then on. I wish family members would understand that a hug and I love you once in a while would mean so much and help the journey so much easier. I have lots of flaws but I try. The frustration and paperwork to make sure is done for so many things, and making sure she’s safe. The unknown alone is overwhelming. Good night and God bless you all for listening and providing advice. Just going to to the store is a welcome chore to get away for a while. I have 2 of my grandchildren living with us and I look forward to coming home and being with them. 3 other grandchildren live 45 min away and we take trips to see them but mom sits and doesn’t hardly speak.

I have a horrible guilt I never wanted to be a nurse, CNA, or any related field. I am having a lot of guilt because I’m not doing a real good job in my eyes. I wasn’t built to be a caretaker. But I try my best. I’m tired, wrung out and not coping well I am trying to remember my mom as she was.. Not as she is. We used to have long talks and she was the one that always comforted me when I was down and felt lost. My mom is here.. but not here. It makes me sad. But I know that I'm doing what I can. #ihatealz

My mom has Alz. She was diagnosed about 4 years ago. She is in a skilled nursing facility right now. About 2 years ago she was put on Hospice and she graduated out of hospice and was admitted to memory care where she is now. She's been declining quickly over the last few weeks. I got the call today that they want to put her on hospice. I kind of expected that, but I don't want this to happen. On one hand she suffering tremendously. And on the other hand I love her and I want her to be with me. I feel so conflicted right now. I could use some prayers please. I hate this awful disease..and I know it's like torture... But I hope others will smile...I'd like to share one of those good moments that you have.. My mom and her room mate get along so well at the nursing home. My mom gets weaker and weaker, but is doing ok for now...Her room mate is not as bad as she....but they get along so well. We've been blessed to have them together. This is heart warming. Got to have some smiles.#ilovemymom Its been a month or so since my last post. I am trying to make sense of something I don't understand. Maybe you guys can help me process this. My mom's Dr called and told me that my mom is doing well. She's not as depressed as she has been and she was able to respond to the Dr. That was good news. Then right after that he told me that the US government is making changes to the meds they are allowed to distribute. He continued to tell me that all of the meds that help me mom should be cut back. This includes her Lexipro and Spariva. These are two meds that are crucial to her well being. The Lexipro is her mental meds to clam her so she can handle the situation the best she can. The Spariva is her Asthma Meds so that she can breath as normal as she can. He also confused me when he told me that the US government is in an opioid epidemic and that they are suggesting these meds are cut back. I asked him if either of those meds were considered an opioid? He responded to me by saying no. Hummm, Well, why is a panel of government officials telling you that you have to take the very meds that are helping my mom and making it so that she does not suffer anymore. With out my mom's Spariva.. she could have a serious asthma attack. It helps with her lung function. Take away her Lexipro and she is miserable. Why? There was no explanation as I continued to probe. He assured me that he would not take away her meds. There are good days and there are bad days. For my mother and for me. Unfortunately today was one of those days where my mom was pretty good but I was so sad. I couldn't stop crying. I can't put my hands around the concept that my mother will die from this horrible disease. It breaks my heart because there's nothing I can do. Most of the time I am pretty strong. But today I'm breaking down. My mom is OK to day except remembering her 10 years ago is making me sad because she's not the same lady. I'm lucky my mom is here, and I know it. But it still breaks my heart to have this disease rob you of your life..

I think the beginning of the end is starting. I'm at the nursing home. Mom is refusing to eat and wont wake up. I hope that this is one of those time where she will bounce back. But I have to prepare for the fact that it might not happen. She is weak and she is frail.. and I thank God for my time with her. I am so confused right now. I dont know what to pray for. Please God help me accept your will.

I lost my mother to Alzheimer's on Thursday September 6th. She's flying with the angels and visiting with her mother, father and son. I so appreciate this group. I have conversed with people from all over the place and have been very fortunate to learn from them and to pass on some of my experience. I am so thankful for everyone that encouraged me through this process. I'm sad that my mom is gone but on the same hand I know she's not suffering. I will miss her so much. I was very fortunate to get some videos of my mother. Please allow me to share with you my most prized video right now.

I really like being in this group. My mom passed in September. It was heartbreaking as well as a relief to not see her suffer. I batteled the feeling of guilt when I felt the relief. I am told this is normal. I hurt because I will never see her again on this earth. But then I'm reminded that I lost her a year ago to the dreadful disease of ALZ. I also fear of getting ALZ my self. It scares me so much. I'm in my 50s and have read of so many cases where it starts earlier in people. I am trying to change my life to be more healthy and concious of what I eat and exercise. I am eating Turmeric because they say that helps. All of the folks that have lost a loved one to ALZ.. my heart goes out to you. My prayers are for a cure and my Hope's are that I get to see that in my lifetime. This place is a good place to vent.. and to compare your feelings with others. It's the 1st place I went when I needed guidance. When I saw others post.. I could relate to them. Thank you so much. I am not getting out of this group with the hopes that I can contribute to someone who feels lost like I did when the journey began. Sheila My heart is breaking... My mom asked me to help her get to the other side. The decline is not rapid.. it's slow and so painful for her. So painful for me to watch. How do you cope with this? How can I help her feel different? Any suggestions? I am sick and tired of having to fight for my mother. I'd like to know if I am the only one who feels this way or if it's just me. Here's my situation. My mom is on Hospice. Shes in a skilled nursing facility. Is it too much to ask to have consistancy? The facility used to be a great place. Now they are going through a management change. And everyone can care less about what is going on. I sware, if I hear one more time this is not my job, or that's just the way it is, I am going to screem. I have tried to get a consistant bill for ever. They can't provide that for me. They tell me that it's the billing process that puts everything together. I should be able to get one bill for one month. And I should be able to understand it. I have tried to call the "new" person in charge and they dont call me back. I get such attitude when I do call, it makes me want to screem. This is the 2nd facility that I have encountered these issues with. It seems that all the facilities go through this. No one stays. They are always moving around. Uggggg Does anyone else have different experiences? I'm very lucky so far. My husband Don has stayed his sweet self. The hard part is to see him leaving me a little each day. I feel the death of so many things we used to share. It's hard to be alone when the person is still here. I'll take anything I can get. One thing that makes all this so hard is my husband and I were never apart. Every waking moment was spent together. I never got tired of him and or him me. I needed the routeen as much as he did. He is the other side of me. Here's one for you. I can say to my hubby "do you want a shirt?" and he will look at me with an empty star but if I ask him " do you want a s-h-i-r-t? Then he understands. Spelling works for some strange reason. Anyone else ever try this? We found this out by accident.

After a very hard night my husband looked at me and asked "Do you have a disease too?" He knows he is slipping and that makes me so sad for him It's been an extremely hard week and it's still far from settled what I will do for Don. The re-hab centers that the VA suggested got horrible ratings and reviews. I printed out the reviews and left them for the case worker to see when she comes in tomorrow. I'm seriously thinking of taking him home. I have a friend who has offered to build us a ramp so I can get him in the house safely. He can now sit up with help and he can stand and walk with help. I'm my husband's only caregiver. I don't mind, I love being with him. But with this Arizona heat I can't take him out much. I figured out how to push him in his wheelchair and pull a shopping cart but if it's too hot I can't get out to run any errands. I've been trying for 4 weeks to get the VA to ok someone to come in for a while so I can go do what must be done. Sometimes I feel cut off from the rest of the world. This disease can make your life very lonely as a caregiver. So tired. Just went three days of no sleep with my husband. Not sure what the next step is going to be. Feeling so down.

Night before last my sweet Don was talking in his sleep almost all night. Any other time I would just wish to sleep. But this time it was music just to hear his voice. It's very rarely he say anything anymore. It was a gift from God to hear him speak even if it didn't have anything to do with me. Good morning to you all. We had a crazy night. Don was looking for something under the bed all night. He didn't even know what he was looking for. Every time you get kind of comfortable in a stage they take another turn. Never a dull moment. Gave him a bath and now he is back in bed. Hopefully to get some sleep. This is the life of us caregivers This is where I am right now. Does anyone else get their loved one into bed and then you think "I better get in bed myself to be ready for the next day" but find you can't seem to go because you don't want give up the "My Time" ?

They say that stress, lack of sleep, and a broken heart can kill you. Well I'm living proof that's not true. Please forgive my rant. I'm suffering from all the above. Give me a couple of days and I'll be back on track. I need some suggestions on sleep medications. We've tried Trazidone and that was a complete failure.When I speak to the doctor again I would like to bring some of your suggestions to the table. Thanks for your help.

Remember you are never alone. We are all in this together. Have a Blessed Friday I thank God for this place to share what we are all going through, the good and the bad, So much understanding. Being a caregiver to someone you dearly love is very hard work but you savor every moment you have because someday soon you will wish they were back.. What I would give to have my Sweet Don back. It wasn't a chore it was a privilege to care for him. I miss him so much.

My sweet guy passed away from this horrible disease last January. Not only have I lost him but I feel I've lost me too. The last ten months we were literally one. I was his arms. legs and was constantly troubleshooting to make his life as peaceful and safe as possible. I'm lost without him. Cherish every moment you have with them, God bless all you caregivers. You have a mission from God. <3 My Dear Sir-Care-a-Lot passed away last January 25th. How do I get pass the feelings that I didn't do enough to make him want to stay? When he had to be put in a hospital bed at home did he feel I gave up on him? I struggle with these questions all the time. Maybe it's just I don't want to except he's really gone. I want him back!! My sweet Don is finally at peace. He passed away this morning. I will be lost without him. Thank you all for being here through these last ten months. My Don has been gone for 5 months. The hardest part is I never know when I'll get hit with the pain of the loss. It takes nothing to trigger it. I miss him so much

Today my sister-in-law did something so wonderful for me. She came to my house and said there was a sale on our favorite ice cream and would i like to go get some? She would stay with Don, my husband who has dementia. She could've just gone and got it for me but she let me get out and go get it myself. It was so refreshing to get out. She is such a doll. That's why we call her Santa Barbara The sudden changes are so hard to deal with. Some are permanent but some aren't. Each day is so different from the next. Some people can't understand and they want you do things for them. Some days we can and others we can't. You can't make any plans. Plus I wish people would come see us. It's lonely by ourselves. Just needed to cry on shoulders that understand. Does any one know what the ratio should be between aids per patients? Does any one else wish you could have just one day that you could text the rest of the family with a good update. Just about the time I was going to text that Don was very alert and having a great day his nose started to bleed. It bled from 9:30 am until 6:pm. For those who haven't heard my Don is in the VA hospital. He fell this last Monday. . A Cat-scan showed that he has broken his back. Unfortunely it has set him WAY back with his Alzheimer's .He will have to be moved to a long term facility Monday. The house is soooo very empty without my dear Sir-Care-A-Lot.. I don't know how much of him I will get back or how much will be lost forever. .He doesn't know me. . I'm in a sad numbness. Please keep him in your prayers. This guy is so precious to me.

Well this last Monday I was to spend my "Personal Time" doing thing for myself. Sounded good. Don's Aid Will came at 10 am. By 11:30am I was in the emergency room with a kidney stone that is blocking the left kidney. Two day in the hospital. Thank God for my friends Carol Wray and Lois and Will. They had my back. It wasn't my idea a a personal day LOL. Got to have a sense of humor sometimes. The kidney stone is scheduled to be removed next Wednesday. Wish me luck. Been down this road before. My sweet husband has had a few really bad days. He fell Monday and hurt his back. Things have been changing a lot in the last two weeks. I've also notice when there is some kind of physical trama things really get worse.. Last year it was his gall bladder surgery. He was totally gone for 3 weeks and when he came back he had lost a lot. I don't know what this new episode will bring. Scares me a lot! He means so much to me:( We're moving into the hard times. Hospice is moving in a hospital bed today sometime. It's getting too real now. My heart is breaking. Need your prayers to get through this.

Is it normal for someone with dementia to always undress? We can't keep my mom's clothes on.

My mom is currently in the hospital with a horrible UTI. She isn't swallowing anymore, but they haven't done any feeding tubes yet. I think it's weird they aren't feeding her something as she is type 2 diabetic. My question is, when they quit swallowing, what does that generally mean? She is pretty lethargic with a blank stare and doesn't say much at all. I fear the end is near. Do they eventually start swallowing again or no? I feel so alone!!! I'm with my mom right now the nursing home. She got really excited to see me to the point where she kept asking me why I'm here. She said she was going to go home with me. I told her I couldn't take her home so she told my husband who is here with me that she will go home with him. I HSTE seeing my mom like this and I'm so devastated. I'm angry at my family because no one seems to understand what I'm going through. My husband said she seemed fine while I'm sitting here, bawling my eyes out. They don't get it!

I went to see my mom today. She has been in the hospital for 2 weeks now. She has Dementia. When I walked into her room, she was shivering. She didn't realize she kicked off her blankets so I got her blankets in order and comfortable. Today she was in good spirits. She told me she wanted "one of those things" (my cell phone) and asked how much they cost. We went through that 3 times, but each time, I acted like it was the first time she said it. I made sure to show her pictures, talked about her grandkids and talked about good memories. I found this rather difficult as my mom was emotionally, verbally and physically to me my first 20 years of life, but I pushed that all aside and focused on the good memories I did have with her. I ran into my dad on the way out and just cried and cried. I feel so bad for all she and he are going through. And despite my mom's past, I wouldn't ever wish this horrible disease on her or anyone. I went and saw my mom today. Yesterday she was restrained to her bed because of her severe UTI. She is in what I believe is the last stage of dementia. She is non-verbal and when I walked in, she seemed to recognize me this time as her eyes seemed to light up. I talked to her as she kept repeating the word "house" today. Before I left, I told her my son passed his driving exam and I THINK she understood because she got really excited and started saying the word "driving" over and over. She even hugged me back today when I hugged her. Today was a good visit. I went to see my mom today. She recognized me today and kept hugging me and cried because she was happy. Today we talked about her grandkids and how she has been married for 42 years. This was a good visit. I saw blurbs of my mom. It's like her memory skips like a scratched record. Definitely hard to watch, but so happy she remembered me today. I went to the nursing home to see my mom today. She recognized me. Today she talked to me about how she quit smoking. (She was forced to quit back in January). She was in a good mood today. I only stayed 30 minutes as any time longer than that, she gets upset when I leave. I went to visit my mom in the hospital yesterday. We had a nice visit. She told the nurse she has 4 children (3 sons and a daughter). I teased the nurse and said I wasn't sure where the other two kids came from (mom only has my brother and I). Anyway, she was in good spirits, excited about being moved to a nursing home in the next week or two. In the meantime, I took this photo of the sunset as we watched from her hospital room.

My mom will be leaving the hospital and go to a care home in a couple weeks. I'm worried it will not be a smooth transition. All she does is want to go to her home. Her mind is still with us, but not enough that my dad can properly take care of her anymore. My question is, if your LO went into a home, how was the transition? My dad will be with her to get her settled and we will all visit often.

Thank you for the add. My mom was just diagnosed with Alzheimer's. She was admitted into the hospital on Sunday and she is still there. She is a diabetic and an amputee. She thinks it's the year 1995 and she doesn't know where she is or why she is in the hospital. It's so hard seeing my mom like this. We were told it is best she is placed in a memory loss care facility. My dad can no longer care for her, as she wanders at night and also becomes very agitated. He worries about her safety.

My heart just breaks for my dad. He went to see my mom in the nursing home today and brought her some pictures. She tried to eat them. He tried talking to her, but instead she wheeled around all over the home. Dad just followed her around. He called me crying today telling me how lonely he feels. He lives down the street from me, so I'm going to spend more time with him.

My mom has late stage dementia and since tomorrow is Mother's Day, I wasn't sure what to really give her. I decided to make her a picture book of the family. It's a 6x6 inch album with pictures of herself and family inside. I wrote each name by the person and next to her photos of herself, I wrote "Me". I made sure to put her name in the book in case it goes missing in the nursing home. I hope this brightens her day.

I went to see my mom today. Still in the hospital. Today was a tough visit as she kept taking the only article of clothing (a scrub top) off and on and screaming, "come on!" I asked her where we are going and she said the commissary. (The military grocery store). She didn't even realize I was there. This is so exhausting. I wish my friends understood what I'm going through. I can't even go to work because my all my thoughts are consumed with my mom and then worrying about my dad's stress. Tonight we got a phone call from the nursing home to come say goodbye to my mom. They said she can go at any time. She is a type 2 diabetic and with the combination of dementia, she seems to be going so fast. What I mean by fast is at Christmas I could have a completely normal conversation with her. So signs what so ever. Two weeks later she forgot everything and everyone and has gone downhill so fast. My dad is devastated. We all are. My parents have been married for 42 years. I've done everything I can for my dad, to be there in support. I HATE this horrible disease so much. I said my goodbyes tonight, asked her to please watch over us and prayed over her. My mom went to heaven this morning at 4:40am. I was able to say my goodbyes to her on Tuesday. Thank you for all the support in this group over the last 8 months. Please love your loved ones with all your heart. This is a devastating disease. My mom has been in the hospital since the 3rd of July with a severe UTI. She has been rapidly declining and today they recommended hospice and tonight they removed all meds to include her insulin. I'm beside myself. I know the time is coming where we will lose her.

I'll make this as short as I can. Yesterday morning my mom was found unresponsive in the nursing home. They got her to the hospital where they discovered a severe UTI and sepsis. They currently have her strapped to a bed because she is combative. She kicked me while I was there today. I think my mom is at her final stage of dementia. She undresses herself, can no longer feed herself and can't talk. She is a diabetic and her diabetes is hard to manage. My question is, if this is the final stage, what is an estimate of how much time she has left? She also no longer recognizes people or objects. It's devastating.

I feel bad for feeling frustrated, but every day my dad visits my mom in the nursing home. She has vascular dementia. The way he makes it sound, it's like he can hold conversations with her, she remembers stuff, etc. When I go, I spend the entire time chasing her around the nursing home as she wheels herself all over and when I do try to corner her to talk to her, she just babbles and then takes off. I get frustrated at my dad because he makes me feel guilty for not seeing her often (I go once a week), but it is exhausting for me to attempt to visit with her. I always leave upset and crying. I was never close to my mom anyway (she was abusive) and I feel he shouldn't make me feel bad. I've told him my thoughts on this and all he does is turns around to my 16 year old son and says, "when she passes, she will feel bad that she didn't visit more." Seriously?! Even my own kids don't like their grandma. I wish my dad understood this. I hate this disease so much. My dad just stopped by and I was showing him my son's cap and gown for graduation and he started to say, "I wish your mom..." and then he started to cry. He misses my mom so much. She is in a nursing home with late stage dementia and it just breaks his heart. I wish I could make him feel better.

The 3rd of July my mom was rushed to the hospital from the nursing home with a severe UTI and borderline sepsis. She was dismissed yesterday and back in the ER again today. My dad went to her side and told me her antibiotics just aren't strong enough so they are trying new meds. He worries her health is declining so rapidly. (She has vascular dementia and type 2 diabetes). Her blood sugar levels have been all over the place, at one point so low that she had a seizure last month. My dad always scares me when he calls me because he makes it sound like she can pass at any moment. Today I rushed to the ER and when she saw me, she knew exactly who I was! I hugged my mom for what felt like forever and just sobbed into her arms. I stayed with her for an hour and as she just stared off into space, but then would look at me and give me such a big smile. I'm trying so hard to be strong for my dad! I just wish she could shake this nasty UTI as it is causing so much confusion for her. My dad called me yesterday, so upset. My mom was unresponsive yesterday for quite some time. She just would not wake up. The hospital even gave her Narcan because they think the nursing home is overdosing her and that did not wake her up. They discovered she has a bad UTI and borderline sepsis. She will remain in the hospital for a couple days. I'll know more details later today. My mom was moved to the nursing home from the hospital, finally. Dad checked on her this morning and she was sitting on the floor, butt naked. They told my dad they couldn't get her blood pressure checked or get her to take her meds. This really makes me mad! She is a type 2 diabetic, so are they just not going to give her the meds she needs? This is supposed to be a nursing home that specializes in Alzheimer's and dementia.

My dad went and saw my mom in the hospital today. He said she didn't look good. Later he found out her blood sugar levels were over 600 last night and as low as 24. (She is diabetic). I'm not understanding why her levels are so out of control, I don't know much about it. She is insulin dependent. I feel so bad for her as she is dealt this double whammy with Alzheimer's and diabetes.

Is becoming a kleptomaniac part of Dementia? My mother is apparently collecting things from other patients. I hope this is a phase. 樂 ♀樂 My mom was brought in via ambulance today from the nursing home to the hospital. She seems to have another UTI. My mom hasn't recognized me in weeks, but when she saw me today, she said, "my daughter! Heidi!" That made me so happy. My heart pretty much exploded. She will stay at the hospital again for a Ifew took days. my oldestAs I was sister leaving, with she me kissedto see myour hand. mom. She Our is mom in the had last my stages sister of at dementia, 17 and placed so this her was up huge for today. adoption thanks to the hand of my grandma. Anyway, they reunited when I was 13. My sister hasn't seen my mom in a few years. The visit was good today. My mom remembered/recognized me, but had no clue who my sister is. We spent the time with our mom as she talked about how she needed to go to school today. At the end of the visit she no longer recognized me and thought I was her sister who passed away many years ago. Regardless of that, it was a good visit. I hate dementia so much. I took my 3 kids to see my mom today. She has late stage dementia. She recognized and remembered all of us today and she, my oldest son and I all cried. I made my mom a small photo album of her family for Mother's Day. I'm so thankful she recognized us. This was truly a wonderful gift.

I saw my mom today and this time I brought my oldest son with me since I was taking his senior photos near the nursing home. Mom always said he was her favorite out of her grandkids and I truly believe that. He was her first. She knew exactly who he was!! Me however, she didn't know who I was. That's ok. As we were leaving, she gave my son the biggest hug and said she loved him so much and called him by his name again. I just bawled. I was so happy she remembered him, but so sad and frustrated that this disease is taking my mom slowly. My mom has finally been moved to a nursing home. My dad went to see her today and she just stared at him. He asked her if she knew him and she kept staring. She finally said yes, but when he asked her what his name was, she just kept staring. This makes me so sad, especially when my dad feels she doesn't have very many days left.

My mom who couldn't speak for 2 weeks is finally talking in sentences. However, she is extremely confused as to be expected. I had an emotional visit with her. She thought I was her best friend who she hadn't seen in years. I asked her who I was a couple times and she kept telling me I was her bff. I asked her where Heidi was (me) and she couldn't tell me. This disease sucks!!! I did get a couple pictures of me and my mom today. My mom was diagnosed 3 weeks ago with significant dementia. She also is an amputee and she is an insulin dependent diabetic. She has been in the hospital because they can't get her diabetes under control. That being said, I don't have the best relationship with her, but she is my mom. I've been helping dad out as best I can. I'm now becoming depressed which is wearing on my husband. I think he is getting frustrated that I just can't snap out of the way I feel. I don't know what to do. I'm also losing interest in friendships and things I once enjoyed. I'm considering a therapist. Has anyone else that feels depressed found a way to feel better? I'm on meds for anxiety/depression, but I don't feel like it's helping.

Geez had to tell my mom she needed to shower and now she's mad at me. Does the guilt ever get better??

Why do I argue? Why do I argue? Ugh. I know better.樂 Doc suggested my mom may need to be placed in a memory care facility. The guilt is overwhelming me. Don't know if I can. I need help. I'm lost.

After 2 years of 24/7 I'm having to put my mom into an assisted living apartment. Plus she's telling everyone that we are kicking her out. Even strangers. Some look at me like I'm the devil. Ugh She's fighting me every step of the way. I pack something she unpacks it. So now I pack fast and tape up the box quickly. So the day care that I signed my mom up for decided they don't have enough people enrolled so they are shutting the group down. It was my life line so I could go back to work. I've heard you can't trust people that come into your home. Any suggestions?? Yard work is my therapy. It's a beautiful day here. Out getting my garden in and my mom comes out and totally goes off on me for not talking to her. I invited her out but NO. Dear god give me strength. I'm always outside in the spring. Sorry guys.

My mom all of a sudden wants to give herself her medications. Says she's a grown ass woman and needs no help. Should I let her try it with supervision and show her she cant?? Not sure on this one. Help.... I know better than to argue back. I know better. 樂樂樂 I need a break. 24/7 is doing me in.

My moms in an assisted living facility. I'm having the problem of finding her friends there. She cries all the time because she is lonely. I take her out of there 2 to 3 times a week. She has NO hobbies, doesn't read does nothing really. Never did. I'm at a loss on what to do with her. Buy a friend??? Its only me that does anything with her. No one wants to visit with her because shes so depressing. Any ideas? Shes pretty much with it most of the time but cant live on her own. Sorry long post.

Does anyone else's person keep telling you that they know you don't want them there?? My mom cries every single day saying I don't want her here. And that she wants to die. Help

Maybe dumb question but when do you know it's hospice time? My mom's in assisted living apartment and just had a heart attack and her carotid artery is 70 percent blocked still. Had a small hemorrhage in her brain also. She actually does pretty well sometimes but the others all she wants to do is die. Do I let them do another surgery?? She's 88. Sorry just so conflicted. Ugh. Sorry long post. Talking to my mom's primary and asking questions on this site,doesn't my mom need to be diagnosed with testing ?? He says no. I know memory loss but what kind?? And she's getting worse. I guess go over his head?? I'm so confused. Question? My mom has been diagnosed with memory loss by her primary,doc. How do I find out what level she's at? She's slipping pretty fast.

Mom's primary doc recommended a psychiatrist to see. And a neurologist. I don't know what kind of dementia she has yet. I don't understand the psychiatrist. Do you all agree she needs both? I know my mom can't help it but I totally dread tomorrow. She thinks Christmas is over. All she does is cry and I try to fix it. She's getting worse by the day. I'm at a loss. Finally happened. My mom didn't know me this morning or my husband. I talked until I calmed her down. She thinks she can live by herself and wants to go home. Do I try to explain her memory loss? She's scared and thinks she's going crazy. Got a call in to her doc. Not sleeping either. Help. Any suggestions? Rips my heart out.

My mom's on the phone telling everyone how bad I am to her. That I gave away all her belongings. We turned our garage into a exact copy of her living room so she'd be comfortable. Hasn't been in it once. Omg. Meltdown time. I can't take this. Just ignore. Just ignore. My mom has told me Happy Birthday every day for the last week. NOT my birthday lol. Where's my present??? Just kidding about the present.

I did what I said I'd never do. I screamed at my Mom. After her telling me at least 20 times I hate her and that she will find a place to move to tomorrow I couldn't take it anymore. Totally lost my cool. Now I feel like a jerk. I tried calmly talking to her all day. I'm a type 1 diabetic and my blood sugar is now 576. Seriously can't do this anymore. I should be thankful to still have my mom. She's so mean and hateful I just want to drive away. Always wants to argue. No friends,no respite, no daycare,no break. 24/7 . I can't do this much longer.

So my mom has been in a assisted living apartment for 3 months now. She hates it, doesn't want to make friends, won't do activities and cries all the time. She's the most negative person I've ever seen. She lived with us for 2 years and all she wanted to do was fight and argue. My health couldn't take it anymore. Well this morning she begged to come back and that she'd stay in her room. Says she's gonna kill herself if I don't let her. What the heck do I do????

My mom's in assisted living,hates it. Now she's saying she's moving. She's NOT. Most negative person I've ever known. Sometimes I just get worn down. She won't give it a chance. Been there almost 3 months. Won't join activities at all. Every day a different object is "stolen". Anyone else's SO like it after a while?? Sorry long post. Now I'll feel guilty all day for not bringing her to our house. Ugh. All my mom is doing today is wanting to argue. About everything. I'm trying NOT to lose it. Ugh. I know this is trivial compared to others. Sorry.... Manicure day. Mom loves her nails painted.

How do you handle dental care ? tough visit with mom. Last stage of dementia. Just wants to lay in bed and sleep. No eat, no drink no meds. Ugh! Hopsice says its part of it. Mom seemed comfortable today. We talked about shelling peas, freezing tomatoes, making cakes and cleaning the house. I ask her 3 different times if she would like to get up. she said she was comfortable, or no not now, or no I really don't want to. It pains my heart to see her like this. She is 91yrs old. Lived a good life. I understand this is part of it. Any words of encouragement are welcome. Mom said it again yesterday and it just blows my mind when she says " Jan thank you for all you do for me". Moments of saneness. Love them. Kitty therapy today. Mom was trying to whistle for the kitty. Sophie loves mom Every time i take mom for a drive she continually comments on the trees. Look how green they are. Look how thick they are. Just look at all the trees. I asked my sister what do you think and she said maybe Mom is just now really noticing the trees.

So mom has been mean in the evenings. Sundowners and now the full moon. She’s on medication to help with that. Friday the hospice nurse tells me how mom changes from this sweet lady to this mad angry woman. Today the daytime worker tells me “ maybe you can get her to get up” from chair. (Maybe mom doesn’t like this lady)Then later another worker tells me how mean she was the other night when they were getting her ready for bed, but she’s so sweet during the day. I’m worried about her getting kicked out. Tell me I’m not alone with this. I know it’s the disease. Mom had a moment of sanity last night. She looked me in the eyes and said,”i couldn’t live without you. I just don’t want to be a burden to you.” I said “ mom, i love you. You’re not a burden”. Then she slipped back into sundowners. I almost lost it 樂樂 So it’s full moon. Last night i went to see mom at “ sundowner” time, 6pm. We had a wonderful visit. Even spent about 45 outside in the AL courtyard with beautiful flowers and a light wind. When we went back in and i tried to leave she wasn’t having it! She was going with me. “ I’m not staying here!” I tried redirecting, i tried sitting her with friends i tried everything i could think of. She started crying sitting on her bed saying she hopes she was a good mother. Her room mate started crying saying “ i just wanna go home”. Omg it was terrible. I kissed mom on the cheek told her i loved her and i would be right back. I left and spoke with the girls on duty and told them i stayed to long to night. I feel terrible. I know mom won’t remember that i left. They encouraged me not to go back to her room that they would give it about five minutes and go down there and help her get ready for bed. Because if I went back down there it would start up all over again. I felt rotten that i left my mom like that. I know when I get to visit her this morning she won’t remember one bit of it. It reminded me when I had to leave my babies in preschool and they’re screaming with their arms out for me not to leave. UGH!!! Full moon and sundowners The Easter bunny came today AND brought cupcakes. I also completed the Understanding Dementia course. It’s all free. It helped me.

Mom is sleeping a lot during the day. Up some at night. Refusing to eat or drink some days. Spits out her meds , even with applesauce or pudding. Doesn't always know who i am now. I miss my mom. When mom used to live in her house and then in assisted living and then the very beginning of memory care , she had a phone and i would call her many afternoons on my drive home from work. We ended the Have you ever felt like, when you're sharing with others about your loved one and situations that happen good and bad, that by their actions, and response, they could really care less? That you're totally boring them? I have to keep reminding myself people have no idea unless they have walked in our shoes. So I'm so thankful for this group. Mom and her babies. She told me they weren’t real but they are so cute Today was a good day. She sat in a comfy chair in her assisted living room and watched me hang family pictures. She asked me who her grandchildren, and great grandchildren were over and over and I told her over and over as if it were the very first time.We played Doris Day songs and the Gaithers, and I danced for her and she laughed. I love you mom Mom took my hands and danced (swayed back and forth ) with me today. 樂❤樂樂 OK the next funny is. A commercial came on the TV at moms place about a ageless foundation, make up. Mom asked me what that was about and I told her it's a foundation to help older women look younger. So mom says, when are you going to start using it? I danced with mom today and it was fun. Even though she won’t remember it, I will. Mom's sister sent her a new baby doll today, and she loved it!

I just joined this group and am very thankful to read and know i am not alone. I suffer from feeling so guilty if i dont go by and visit mom in the memory care. I usually go 3-4 days a week. I work FT. She is always so happy to see me, and does not remember that i was there the day before. I feel guilty if i go out of town for the wknd. I feel guilty if i have a day off to go to appt and run errands and i dont go by to see her. I know my time is short with her and this disease. She and i are closer than ever. She’s a friendly dementia person. Every now and then the angry comes out. Anyone else feel like this? Is it crazy to feel guilty on my day off for not going by and taking mom out for a bit? I know i shouldn’t feel guilty. We had been outta town to visit our son in college. Flight delay and finally got home at 130am. Just dragging today. Geez the guilt.

Yesterday she was all smiles, today she told me to go away leave her alone and come back another time.

You know when you plan something with your LO it often times works out in a different way. I’m a bit depressed as the disease takes over. This afternoon all mom wanted to do was sleep. Did not want anything to do with me. They said they had to help her with breakfast because she could not remember how to use her fork. She would not eat lunch. I’m very sad. Hugs to all of you as we dredge through this horrible mess. So I ask mom, “ who is your best friend?” After thinking for a few seconds and me naming several people mom finally says, “ i would say you”. Awwww mom. 樂You made me tear up. So my mom told me i was a smart ass today and i started laughing and so did she.

My mom makes me laugh. A huge beach seen poster. She loves to look at it every time we walk by. How do you deal with oral care? My mom has no teeth and brushing is a problem. How do you deal with weight loss in Alz pts , especially if they dont move around as much I don't normally post pictures of my mom who has Alzheimer's. And I think a lot of it has to do with privacy issues. It's not that I am ashamed of it it's just something that happened but I'm posting this picture because this is a really nice one of her. I went to visit her at the nursing home and she was actually a little bit more Lucid then she was for Thanksgiving. I got her to walk around the facility for about 20 minutes and brought her a packet of Twinkies that she likes. I stay for a couple of hours with enough time to feed her her tasty food. I've tasted it and it's not that bad it's just that it looks like three balls of Puree. every time I go I always take pictures and post them on the Family Facebook page. You guys may consider doing this. To share any pictures of your family. This family page is only exclusive to family. Some things are private I don't like plastering family pictures all over the place on my regular page

When do the nursing home around noon. My father had said yesterday that my mom was more animated. But she was pretty much asleep in her wheelchair. Of course hard to kind of wake her up or respond but I don't know if with Alzheimer's they sleep more as well. I think so. Kind of sucky to see your parent like that

Things cannot always be as they were. Especially with Alzheimer's. Like I mentioned before my sister wanted us together and my parents place and me taking her there was difficult in the sense that walking was it a minimal and I feel that we should have done it there at the nursing facility. Just venting out my thoughts to everyone. I work in the medical field. And I've seen all sorts of medical conditions from a to c and a more realistic when it comes to changes. Like I said just venting that I wish we could have held it at the nursing facility I don't know what we're going to do for Christmas in the sense that we should do it at my parents and or nursing home. We shall see

We planned Thanksgiving as though it were previous days in the past. Where we would gather at my parents house for a ginormous potluck Thanksgiving. This year my mother was admitted to a nursing and Memory Care Facility. I wasn't sure whether she was going to be able to go to the family house for the day. I wanted at least to have a potluck dinner at the nursing home. Because they have a wonderful elegant dining room you can rent for the day. Free and be with family. My sister decided she wanted it done at the family home. It's gotten to the point where it's very difficult for Mom to go from the nursing home to the house up 13 steps into the house. When I picked her up this morning she was kind of slump down and looking down. The nursing facility did a wonderful job getting her together and nicely dressed. I rented a wheelchair and between my brother-in-law and two nephews they managed to get her up the stairs and a small transport chair. I guess we all want to think that things will be alright that things could be like they were before. But it was just difficult for Mom in the sense that she was not much there physiologically speaking and it was at least nice having her and my father together. They have been married 64 years Happy birthday mom Many products are expensive. What is your opinion to get more protein ? Ensure or Whey protein? Ensure has about 9 grams of protein yet Whey has double Perception of temperature. My mom always says...that , that is wet. This is when she touches something that is cold , such as a banister or clothing.

Did uou know...... An estimated 5.5 million Americans of all ages haveAlzheimer's disease. Of the estimated 5.5 million Americans living withAlzheimer's dementia in 2017, an estimated 5.3 million are age 65 and older and approximately 200,000 individuals are under age 65 and have younger-onsetAlzheimer's. This illness takes a lot of good people in all walks of life . Can medicare help with a home care taker? we alway do thanksgiving day at my parents house. Potluck and family, we all chip in. I told my sister that mom was in no shape to be going to the house. that she was out of it. I rented a traveler chair and it took 3 to bring her in the chair up 13 steps and then down. Everything else went fine. Everyone brought their assigened dish and help clean up. Mom had minced turkey , stuffing gravey and cake. I asked my sister that it would be better to do x mas at the nursing home because you can reserve an elegant dinning room for an occasion and the doors can be closed as to not have wandering residents come in. .. No was her response...But yesterday, i think she saw how difficult it woul be for all especially mom. Not to mention the fact that i was going to aske my sister to pick mom up. So x mas will be at the nursing home. 50 years of doing the holidays in their home, change i hard , but it is time.

Sometimes the more I talk about certain problems with my family more I get depressed or rather sad

Fyi As a population gets older in the United States many people have to deal with aging parents who suffer from dementia and or Alzheimer's. An average middle-class person would have to deal with placing their loved one in a nursing home or trying to keep them at home. If you don't know a nursing home can be horrifically financially devastating to the average middle-class person. I often wondered why is it that we don't have some kind of coverage as we would for Social Security Medicare and such. I wouldn't mind if 1 to 2% of my salary would go towards a future elder-care bank for myself. The state of Maine will be asking that question in elections next week. They will be asking voters if they can contribute to a Elder Care Bank by contributing 3% of their salary towards Future Care. This is a step and hopefully the other 49 States will place on their future voting ballots. Many of you may think it is not important to you at your point in life however if you live to be past 65 you may be in need of this. How will you be taken care of if you come down with dementia and or Alzheimer's

This is just my way of venting. I understand that this disease is horrific. Regardless and what stage is. But one of the most things that we would all want is for our loved one to be taken care of if not by ourselves at a facility that specializes in Alzheimer's. What really makes me mad is that even for a middle-income family the expense to have a loved one in a nursing home is financially devastating. Even if the patient with Alzheimer's has any kind of small savings. The state will not help the patient unless you're almost semi destitute. And for the average Joe either you go bankrupt keeping your loved one in a nursing home or you keep them at home with all the other issues that arise such as having additional care and even as far as going to quitting your job and becoming financially destitute yourself in order to take care of a loved one. I wish that the middle class families with members that have Alzheimer's could get some kind of additional financial help when it comes to placing a loved one in a nursing facility when you think of it we are all working to have a nest egg towards retirement that most likely will be used at a nursing facility this chaps my hide

A friend has to put both parents in a nursing home. San francisco cost $8,000 per parent. $16,000 per month. $192,000 per year. If they sell their house for $900,000 the money will last 4.6 years. THEN WHAT So the nursing facility that my mom is staying at did a reassessment of her needs and upped the monthly amount by $1,000. It has been decided by my father that it's best to bring her home and to provide a caretaker for her. Like I had mentioned in my previous comments that it could be financially devastating to keep your loved one in a nursing facility especially in the San Francisco Bay Area This is one of my Rants and Raves regarding this topic I needed a transport chair for my mom. they have many features that are important. Such as hand brakes, removable side arms and tilting feature. There is a medical supply store in my town that sells bandages to hospital bed rentals. I checked out a couple of transport chairs and the prices were very high $300. So i selected the one i liked and went on Amazon.com and found the exact model for $121. Wow!!!!! 2 day delivery. By the way i also bought a nice seat cushion Alzheimer's sucks. If you're poor the state could take care of your loved one if you're rich there is no problem. For the middle class it is financially devastating!!!! One thing about Alz is that it can be financiallly devastating for the middle class. We want to take care of our loved one.

You know what really sucks is that throughout your life we work diligently to support ourselves and our families. And when there is a need for long-term care for a loved one or yourself with Dementia or Alzheimer's we don't have the financial support. Unless we use government services because we have nothing to our name no money no property. I would not mind if one or 2% of my salary tax went towards a fund specifically geared to using this when a person is 65. Like a bank account.

Hello. I have not posted in awhile because things were going good. My mom has alhhz and is in a home. My father , however was upset that the fee for the home went up. And he seems to be taking it out on me and my siblings. We have offered to pay for all utilities but has not taken up the offer because he rather we give him the money straight, instead of one of us just paying the bills. You think it would be easy but no. He does not want one of us on his utility bills. We think he is hiding something and would rather do other things with the money like buying crap. We have gotten to the point where he got into an argument with my brother and sister. We all three have helped him and mom out immensely. And it pisses me off on how he treats us. We have all been suscessful on our own. Not millionaires but responsible siblings. and he treats us like 3rd had citizens. I think he would rather see us picking fruit that doing professional jobs. You would think a parent would want more for their kids to succeed in life. All of this pisses me off...... just venting!!!!! Just like everyone gets social security at retirement. I wish we could get a percentage to use for nursing home expenses!!!!!! I wish I could get some kind of financial help to help my parents I wish the government could help out financially with the costs of alzh!!!

You know it's a real stinker that our government does not provide some kind of financial help lose social security for family members that have Alzheimer's no I'm not speaking of covering 100% but at least help out regardless of financial status. I know some people that are low income would probably get full coverage. However it would be very beneficial to the middle classes as well what do you think What politicians can we complain to about getting $$$ for alzh dementia or elderly care!!!!!? Did you know that if you needed to transport your loved one from one place to another there are services that will do this. They are catagorized at medical transport if you look for them in yelp.com Call around and find the best service for the best price. We did this for our mom and the trip one way came out to $200. Not bad. However, if it is an emergency the insurance will cover it. Are any of your Alz family members a Kaiser Patient? Did you know that Kaiser can give you things that your loved one may need. Our mom needed a hospital bed. Checked with her md. And she qualified for one. Free . It all depends on your plan. So please check with Kaiser before hand. Also wheelchairs, comodes and bathroom chairs are available. This can save you a ton of money. SO CHECK WITH them to see if your loved one qualifies.

If you need a hospital bed for your loved one , and are on the Kaiser permanente plan, check with them about how much the co pay would be for a bed. Turns out my mom can get one for free!! Always check with your insurance company if they cover assesories such as wheel chair, cane, toilet chair , shower chair ...... Can save you money on these things

Well it's starting. The wandering off. Looking for her brothers house. Brother has been dead for over 20 years. She took off out the door today and I grabbed the back of her shirt to stop her. She started screaming "help, help, your hurting me, help somebody help". Yes we were outside. Her craziness ( but she knew what she was doing) is enough to get me arrested for elderly abuse even though I only had her shirt tail. I let her go and she took off down the street in heat of 106 heat index. I had to get in my truck( in my housecoat) and go pick her up on the next block. Smh. I'm at my wits end. I don't think I can do this anymore. I order door locks for dementia patients. Hope they get here soon.

Well this blue moon sure is having an effect on my little dementia lady. She has been so irritable today about everything. She got dressed, put her lipstick on and took off walking down the street looking for the little girls someone had dropped off for us to watch. She just can't imagine why I didn't watch them better. (And she is right....it's hard to keep up with imaginary children all day). Whew....been a long day. I need a drink!!!!

Does anyone know if a major event such as a tragedy could trigger their dementia to progress more rapidly. My LO hates my cleaning sponge. She has decapitated 2 so far. Then hides the parts. Our newest obsessions! Cutting things into tiny shreds(paper, underwear, boxes) Reading aloud the same thing over and over and over. Concerned with going to school. Dear Lord this Louisiana hurricane weather sure has my little lady confused. She is packing her clothes, walking all through the house looking out every window and door. Poor thing. Question???? My little lady with Dementia is constantly looking for her Mama. One minute she is telling me about the cemetery where her mom is buried. The next minute she is asking me where did she go, that she was just sitting on the couch. What is the correct way to answer her? Do I say Mama just left. Do I say Mama is at the cemetery? What do I say? When this job is over...... if one person ask me "where's Mama" I swear I'm going to catch my first felony assault that day! Rant over!

This disease is slowly taking every bit of my sanity and strength. It's killing not only my LO but it's killing the life out of me also. Never, ever will I do this again. I'm miserable. We have had to buy new locks for the doors and windows. I'm a prisoner in more ways than one. I feel like a caged animal. I can't take it. It's entirely too much for 1 person to handle. Sorry for my rant but I'm done. Crispy....fried....through. I would never expect 1 person to go through this for me. It takes an army. I stay on the verge of a complete breakdown. I'm afraid to cry.....afraid I won't be able to stop. This is a living hell for all involved...patient and caregiver. People....dont do it alone. Place them.in a care facility where there are enough people to take turns and it not fall on one person. Do NOT feel guilty about saving yourself and them. It's too unfair to all. RANT ALERT! Please let me rant! These people(lo, so, patient, etc) with dementia, Alzheimer's, need to be in extended Care homes where they can get 24 hour care by trained professionals. It should not be placed on a family member with no break, no relief, no training, no education of this terrible disease except for our precious support group. At least in a home, the caregivers are paid, get to go home and take a break, have days off, insurance, etc. Plus they do not have the emotional attachment to hinder their judgment. Family caregivers get none of that. The stress is unbelievable. The guilt can be overwhelming. From am I doing enough, am I being too impatient, should I not expect so much, etc. I swear, I will never do this to my kids or family members. And you cannot tell me that the ones we are caring for now would knowingly be putting us through this. Thanks for letting me rant. I'm tired. Very tired. Need a break. Need some understanding myself. Need some appreciation. Just give out. Mentally exhausted!!! Well today was the ole accuse everybody of stealing or moving her things day. Geesh! Then we looked for the imaginary kids with a flashlight. I'm exhausted. And so the incontinence has begun... And so has the process of stripping mama of what little dignity she (and us) have tried so hard to prolong. I'm sad. But I'm also super fucking pissed that this horrible illness won't even let her live out her days in peace. And remember a soothing voice is key. Your tone can truly diffuse a tense moment. Bless. My last post was a little heavy, so I wanted to share this fun and memorable moment of clarity I had with my mom today. Here it is, anecdotally: Prison. That’s what mama calls home when she’s bored. And on Shabbat, they don’t do much but rest. Dad fell asleep, mama said “I’m bored in this prison”. It’s my mama - so I BUSTED MAMA OUT OF PRISON to go outside and get some fresh air!! If anyone asks, you last heard we were headed to a private airstrip 樂樂

THANK YOU ALL for helping me through a rough day. Saturday is also my mama’s birthday and I wanted to share it with you all - with gratitude and love ❤樂 The most loving, beautiful woman I know is celebrating her birthday today! HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAMA! I am indebted to you for everything I am; for teaching me how to be a man and how to understand the complex mind of a strong woman. You'll never fully grasp my undying love and adoration for you. 120 ans en plus, b'h" ❤樂❤樂❤樂 樂樂 I can tell you that I love you; that’s easy. But I owe SO MUCH of my amazing life - to you. For that, I can only say I may be your son; but God blessed me to have a mother as wonderful as you. So while I try to find you that 25 year old boyfriend you keep asking for, I’ll say happy birthday Mom. I love you to the core of my soul

I think mama has turned a final corner. She has lost most of her dexterity, and can't use utensils anymore. My mama - who spoke 4 languages fluently - can now barely speak one. She has regressed to the mental and emotional equivalent of a child. She squeals with delight at nothing, laughs hysterically at inappropriate things, and acts like a child. Telling strangers "you're my friend". And I find myself getting frustrated with her behavior. And that's my fault - not hers. While she is obviously not in pain, she's not in reality either. As her son, this is crushing. My mom is the strongest woman I've EVER known. And this new chapter she's in, I'm sure will be one of her last. It hurts. Really fucking hurts. Know what's hard? The feeling of mourning my mama each time her condition degenerates. Caregiver burnout aside, each time she steps down, it's like she's died again. My heart literally feels like this: Alzheimer’s is a horrible degenerative illness. 樂 樂The neurologist said that Dementia / Alzheimer's should be called "failure of the brain," because the other names are nebulous and do not show the severity of the disease to most people. As the patient's brain slowly dies, you know they've changed physically, and the caregivers are often in shock!! Patients will end up bedridden, unable to move, and unable to eat or drink. But it is the different phases beforehand that are just as painful. The day they suddenly forget how to dress themselves, and become confused or combative when you try to fix the shirt, or pants, they've put on backwards. When they repeatedly ask where their life- long mate is while looking straight at her. When they are confused, angry, or frightened, because they are still partially aware of who they were, yet are no longer... So beautiful. So sad. So unfair.

Friends, need some advice. I'm getting ready to move out again as I've been looking after mama (who is also blind), and a bed-ridden dad for 2 years. Our FT caregiver is back but the moment I mention my moving out, mama has an anxiety attack and begins to tremble and cry; even though I'm not going to move far. She is very, very dependent on me for laughter, affection and caring for her. As she says "if I cough, Patrick is there with water and cough syrup". So my absence will be very noticeable. Thoughts? I don't want to cause mama undue anxiety. This works! When I play French music for mama, it takes her back to a happier time; and she hums, sways back and forth and always has a story from her youth at the ready. It always chokes me up. I’m confused.... Mama (blind, late stage dementia & late stage Alzheimer’s) has been puking the last 3 nights. She’s complained of bad heartburn as well. I’ve given her tums, Zantac & today doc suggested gravol. Doc also said it could be a bug. I’m not so sure it’s a bug cuz she’s only puking at night; which makes her very anxious and scared, then she pukes once or twice and eventually gets to sleep. Could this be her digestive system shutting down? I’ve noticed significant changes for the worse in the last few months - she has problems with multi-syllable words which she’s never had before, problems with her dexterity and knowing left from right. If it were a bug, she’d probably be puking throughout the day, have fever, lethargy, etc. Thoughts? Doc didn’t seem alarmed...but I’m starting to worry... I just took mama to get her flu shot. I had to fill out a form, and when I got to a certain question I asked my mom: “hey mama, are you pregnant?” There were 7 nurses and a doctor there. All stopped and cracked up. Whatever it takes to make mama laugh — I’ll do that shit!

How I handle my mama when she has an anxiety attack. .5 mg of Ativan, then I hug her and speak soothingly until she lets go. But I still hold on for a few more minutes to increase her comfort. Then a small joke. I don’t let go until I see her smile. You can see the difference in her eyes. Hope this helps someone. And pardon my look of death - I’ve had the flu for over a week now; and so has she. So I’m pretty burned out.

Feel me? Sadly, most of you do. Wish it were just me dealing with it and not you all. Your stories (and mine) are so hard to read. We didn't chose this - but we still must see it through. For better and for always. Did I burn some herb tonight that made me all thoughtful and kind? Absolutely 樂樂 Bless.

To all caregivers, patients and friend/family members of people with this horrible illness. This is for US. Bless.

Caregiver burnout 樂. I need a hug We all pay the price for this horrible illness. Hello friends, I'm sorry I haven't been around. I hope you all are well. Wanted to post this for you all; we all need to remember that our patient is going through so much more than we can imagine. Patience and empathy should always be top of mind. Much love to you all! ❤樂 Just had the most amazing coffee date with the most amazing woman --> Mama ❤樂 TIP: Something I've been doing for my mom in an effort for her to keep her dignity - I have a business card and on it I wrote "she has virtually no vision and problems with her memory"; and I show that to all nurses and doctors so they can speak to my mom casually, respectfully and get the answers they need - and my mom doesn't have to hear me say it all the time, as she gets embarrassed.

This came up on my “on this day” timeline - and I think it’s something so many of us can use. We don’t have to be perfect, but we try and put SO MUCH pressure on ourselves to be perfect. We just need to know that we made a difference in a loved-one’s life. And YOU ALL make a difference every morning your feet hit the floor and you’d prefer to stay in bed. Feel me? Bless up! 樂樂

Patience Truly is a Virtue 樂 First and foremost, look after your OWN health. Don’t extinguish your own light just to warm others. Bless. If this helps even one of us, it’s worth posting. Bless. You need to find great pleasure in the small things. Happy Friday. Bless. My husband was looking for something last night . Couldnt tell me what it was n i couldnt guess from his babble...he started again this morning. Its so hard when he accues me..i still have no idea...hate this My husband has pretty much forgotten who iam..i had moved us to downstairs bedroom last fall..last night he wouldnt come to bed so i went upstairs 樂..he came up 4am. Thats his room..so i came down n he stayed up..so tonight.i went in downstairs to get pjs onn ge came n went out..so i came out said i was staying up a bi but im sleeping on couch...what do you do

Does anyones lo make these little grunting noises..would this probably be due to brain damage?

I started my husband on cbd oil mid September..i have given 5 drops daily its only 10mg..theres less than 0.78 mg thc per ml..i have noticed past 2 wks..hes more confused admits at times he doesnt realize hes in our home..tried to make egg n toast ..he put the cheese n bolgna in toaster no bread ..another time broke eggs on a plate n put 2 pieces buttered bread on top..this is just a few ..what i want to know..to appease my mind as it helps immensely with his frustration and anxiety paranoia..does this make the disease progress quicker..thanks for any thoughts

Hi..I just started w/o ago my husband on cbd oil for anxiety and panic attacks..he has done well just wondering how long your loved one if on....how long and if years any problems..thanks Hi..my husband is moderate phase..noticed he's been more tired..he sleeps well..but dozing off a lot more..is this norm or should his meds for antidepressants revaluated My husbands getiatric dr today said wr could start a new med ebiza..but its not a cure she said it really doesnt do much .. Said it can cause increase agitation ..anyone out there on this n how did your loved one do with it..we decided to not take Took my 68 yr old husband for yearly checkup with geriatric dr...he completely failed his testing...hes stage 5..we live in canada My gusband is moderare alz..he fad a ercp November. Found 1gallbladderstone..he is not inanydiscomfort..the surgeon wants to remove the gallbladder at some point..does the anesthetic cause them to decline faster. Anyone have their lo go thru surgery Had our yearly check with geriatrics...my husband did the testing he was 12/30 ladt year..today 14/30...grateful.but hard to see how he struggled.. Hi..been awhile..my husband has forgotten me for at leadt 48hrs ..off n on before .now. I show him.our wedding pic he doesnt believe me ..thinks im a friend. My daughter told him im working..wr still share a bed..but he grabbed my arm last nigjt demandinbbi give his money back..hrs 69 n im 65 married 45yrs. Do i just go slong with pretending im a friend.. Thanks for listening

Hi I'm Cindy..My husband diagnosed 2014..He's so frustrated can't do what he wants.license taken away year ago..Still mad N blames me..Were just I think in latter early stage..So every day good day. Only way to deal with..Quite a learning g curve .Thanks for letting me join..I'm in canada I have to stop this madness. I’m tired of the Friday arguments. My hubby for the past 3 years has been doing the dishes at our Amvets Post on Friday nights. For quite a while now, I have to remind him that it’s Friday, dish night. Then the roller coaster begins. He doesn’t want to do it anymore, he’ll do it cuz he likes the money. With sundowners kicking in I notice he gets slower as the night wears on. So I proposed to him that I would take over at the end of the night & do all the cooking dishes for him & he can have all the money (plus he gets a free meal). Sometimes he’s receptive when I show up, sometimes not. So last night I take him (he doesn’t drive anymore) & I was going to do some things in the auxiliary office (I’m an officer). We walk into the kitchen & the dish room is a mess. Clean & dirty stuff. I tried to help him make sense of it but he snapped at me so I went about my business. Next thing I know he’s at the door of the office telling me he can’t do it. So I wound up doing the dishes last night. I wasn’t prepared for this so I’m paying for it today. This morning I mentioned to him about letting the kitchen manager know that will have to find someone else & I got the green snakes coming out of my head look. He obviously doesn’t remember. So I’m "It's just another manic Monday" Wouldn't let me sleep thru the nite. Not supposed to clean the car & we can't afford to pay someone. Not supposed to clean the house. Just supposed to sit all day with him & do nothing but watch TV or play kissy face. Now he's mad, wants to sign the deed of the house over, left to walk to the bar. "It's just another manic Monday"

So, unprompted, my hubby decides to cut the front lawn & sides this morning. It needed to be cut. So he eventually shuts off the mower & comes in. I ask "Are you done or taking a break?" He responds "I'm done". So I remind him that he only cut half of the yard that is in between the driveways. His response "They (the neighbors) can cut it!" He's clearly irritated. So I try to remind him we always cut it & why. It's actually our property. He starts screaming at me. I let it go..for now. It will have to be done eventually! 樂

Ok! So I’m wrong for wanting him put a clean shirt on after his shower. We cut the grass today in 89 degree weather. If I had said nothing he would have worn it to bed & all day tomorrow. ☹樂

Day isn't starting out good. Very argumentative today. I'm being scolded for interfering with his dish washing job at the Amvets Post. (I made him quit for reasons I stated here a while back, and thanks for everyone's support on that). He says doesn't have to tell me if he decides to leave the house for a walk. I need to get some work done at the Post this morning. I'm afraid to leave him home for fear he will decide to walk someplace. If he goes with me, and I'm not finished when HE thinks I should, he says he will walk home. I guess I'll stay home today. I HATE this disease!!! Just about every night my hubby wants to go to bed starting around 7 pm. I get it...sundowning. But he gets angry with me because I won't go to bed too. 1) I won't be able to get to sleep & 2) if I could sleep I'd be up for the day at 2 am. I'm always telling him that he can go to bed but I'm coming later. I make sure he does all his meds & the tell him "see you in a bit". But he's not satisfied. Constantly getting out of bed & being angry with me because I won't go to bed. Anyone else have that problem? Well, I'll be walking on eggshells all weekend. Hubby still obsessing about going to see his son in CA. Can not accept the fact that they already have a house guest. Had words yesterday & he left for 3 hours. Got his neuro appt. moved up to Monday. Can't wait! We had a nice afternoon at a St. Pat's Day luncheon...that is until on the way home. I'm getting the 3rd degree. Him: Why didn't you tell me where we were going? Me: I did, lots of times. You tell me not to tell you things before hand & then you accuse me of keeping you out of the loop. damned if I do & damned if I don't. He apologized for going off on me, in fact he's been real quiet since we got home & is keeping his distance. The hell I go thru for the one I love...... I don’t know what more I can do. Hubby has no concept of time. I told him we were going to the gym & food pantry after. We will leave around 11:30. I get ready about 10:45. He is now upset with me because we are not leaving. I remind him of the departure time. Still upset. He has absolutely no concept of time. I’ve tried waiting until the last minute to say something but he gets upset cuz I didn’t tell him earlier. ☹樂 I can’t win. Hubby was quite mellow today compared the the last 3 weeks. My brother said that they had conversation & hubby wasn't stuttering. I guess adding the Aricept is helping!!! A friend of ours passed away and the wake was yesterday, funeral today. This friend was a part of the Marine Corps League group that my husband, Bob, is also a member. Most of the members know Bob has an Alzheimer's diagnosis. At the wake yesterday, Bob was reminded how to stand watch at the casket by not only the Sr. Vice but by another member. Didn't bother me the 1st time but it did the second time. And this all took place between the 2 watches he was a part of. The 1st time I wasn't bothered but when he was reminded the 2nd time I was a bit miffed but i got over it. Ted, another member who knows about Bob's diagnosis offered to pick him up today and take him to the funeral, graveside, lunch & home. I was fine with it except I was coming to the funeral but going home after so if he could take Bob to the later events, I was OK with that. So after the funeral I'm in the parking lot by the car & Ted walks by to his car & I asked where's Bob? "He walked off the other way" he says. So I look across the lot, Bob sees me & when he gets close I said "You are going with Ted & he will bring you home". I was upset. I couldn't understand why Ted would let him walk off like that unless he forgot Bob's condition. I feel I can't trust him with anyone, they won't take care of him like they should. Bob isn't ready to be homebound, he still works on Friday nights

What a week! My hubby has been fixated on his son's visit last week. He's been agitated over the fact I won't let him go to California to visit (we are in Illinois). There's a number of reason's why that can't happen at this point #1 being we don't have the money. He's driving me nuts with this! I just want to scream!!!!! Thanks for letting me vent. You people are so understanding. Love you all. 樂 Well, just as I suspected, we only got a 1 day visit from my stepson. But he did spend most of the with his Dad before returning to his BFF's place for his birthday & going home today. Guess beggars can't be choosers. He's driving me crazy today! I can't wait until his son from California is here in 10 days. He can spend some time with him while I go do something for myself! Had Neuro appt today. Hated to squeal on the hubby but it needed to be said. Now 3 instead of 6 month follow up & adding Aricept to his Namenda. After the episode this morning, I’m calling the doctor’s office for help. I can’t take anymore of this mental abuse! Hubby went off the deep end this morning. Doesn’t matter what I say, he can’t get it thru his head he cannot go to California right now. Now he’s accusing me of giving all our money to my kids. He tried twice to get out of a moving car today. He has a neurological appt this month. This behavior will most definitely be discussed. For now I’m getting help for myself before I wind up in a psych ward medicated & on suicide watch.

Thank you for all your kind thoughts and prayers. They put my sweetheart on Hospice today. I can’t believe the help they offer. Thought I could handle it alone but have to face the fact I am 80...not a wrinkle and nobody believes I am 80 but me body is telling me it’s true. I feel so blessed. What a night!! I was still awake at 4. Finally got to sleep. Bed alarm went off. Took me a minute to register. The bathroom was a flood, he was soaked as well as the bed. So thankful for bed pads. Got it all cleaned and him back in bed. I know God has to be propelling me along. The distant look on his face tore my heart. I am so blessed he isn't combative YET. My poor pacemaker was going full speed. I am 80 and am so thankful I can still motivate. This disease is so ugly. So thankful for all the modern things. Bed pads save me so much work. Sorry just venting. I can do this with God by my side. Thanks for letting me vent. Do Any of your loved ones moan and cry out all night.

60 yr anniversary today. Didn’t think we would spend it this way. Took my sweetheart to his favorite burger joint. They love him. Treated us to ice cream. He knows who I am but not my name. He was so tender and precious. Told me he loved me a bunch of time HAs hAd UTI. So hard. I got a bed alarm. It is a life saver. Very emotional day. Makes me wNt to be more patient with him. So happy we have so many beautiful Memories. I feel a peace in my heart. I can do this with Gods help and friends here who really understand.

Pretty tough past couple weeks. I spent three scary days in hospital. I am 24/7 caregiver for my sweetheart of 60 years My family helped me through it. My son and his wife came quickly. She cared for him with such tender loving care. They revamped the house to make it easier I have problems with the veins in my legs. I have to take a med to keep the veins open, Terrible leg aches. I have a difficult time asking for and accepting help Please send a few prayers to the man above that we get Hopice. I need help so badly. I am so thankful for friends and family that I came home and stooped down to pick up something and heard a pop. Pain immediately Finally I went for injections today. It is so painful I can barely walk In the middle of this I found a dead battery in my car. He always took care of that job. New battery My kind, professional, caring Dr had Hospice and talk to me. Theywill be here tomorrow to see if we qualify. Please say a prayer. I am 80. I have a know knee and hip, a back surgery a pace maker. I The Hospice people were so kind and understanding and keep me going. I couldn’t do this alone I am so sad and weary Day from hell. I am struggling so hard trying to care for my sweetheart. I went to health and welfare this morning to work on Medicade. Waited an hour to be called. Was at the desk talking to the lady. Next thing I was waking up on the floor. Passed out...fell hard. Went to ER. Tons of tests and xrays. Nothing broken. They pushed IV as I was dehydrated. I have a sore back of my head and sore bottom but soooo blessed! And wounded pride!! Thankful there was hardly anyone there. I am so thankful my son from Utah is here. He took over and took care of his dad. So gentle with him. I have to go back tomorrow no matter how sore and to look at a facility. The whole thing is breaking my heart. I want to take care of him. Just keep reminding myself I am nearly 81 So many health issues...pacemaker, hip, knee, back surgery. The veins in my leg are shrinking down. Have to take a med like nitro to dialate veins..gives mega headaches. Waiting for them to fly a rep in from Seattle so they can put a stent in a vein in my leg. How did you ever handle putting your loved one in a home. Is going to hurt so bad. He has been so good to me I know this is what he would want. I feel soooo blessed (and sore) tonight. My son leaves Saturday and I will be on my own except for hospice Thanks for letting me get it out. I bnever use the word HATE but I hate this ugly disease Thanks for your friendships. Don’t want to be a Willy Whiner but life is tough Sending hugs and prayers. You are the only ones who truly understand

Having a difficult time making decisions. I am burned out. Hospice wants me to do a five day respitethey will put him in a skilled nursing facility for five days. They remind me I can’t pour water from anampty bucket. I have finally decided to do it this Friday. It will be so hard to leave him My legs have vein problems so my dr is doing a procedure that afternoon. I will have time to put up my legs I am even putting my dog with a sitter. It made me so sad today when he asked me if I knew where his wife was I am 80 And full time caregiver. I pray I can rejuvinate and regroup as I don’t want to put him in a home. I am so thankful for Hospice. They help me with so much. Having a difficult day. My hubby either has a bladder infection or prostate problems. My heart is hurting for him. Got some Meds for UTI but not working yet. Please tell me your experience with this I don't know what to do next. Big heartbreak today. He asked them to find his wife. I tried to tell him I am. Wanted to go home. How does it go down so fast I just spent three painful days in hospital with twisted intestine. I am so sad. I want to cry it out but can’t. I might explode

Could use a few extra prayers. Having some trying times. I have help from upstairs holding me up!

I am feeling like I am living on a deserted island. Can barely hold back the tears today. I try so hard to find something he will eat. Just no appetite. I have never had this feeling of loneliness. I am so blessed as he is still gentle and not combative. We just shared everything. The silence is so difficult I feel like my walls are closing in on me. It is too cold to go out. Mom is progressing more rapidly than I have ever imagined and yesterday was a testament to that. I had her all dressed and ready to go for a birthday dinner party that I was invited to. I was finishing getting ready myself when my mom walked into the bathroom where I was finishing up with my hair. She asked me, "Did I put this on right". I was confused because I had already gotten her dressed and there was nothing obvious at first glance. When I lifted up her shirt, I realized what she was referring to. She had put on a pair of underwear over her pants. I can't believe how horrible this disease is and sadden that it continues to affect so many with no cure in the near future.

Things r getting stressful. Mom is constantly saying her room is a disaster. She is taking stuff out of her draws but forgetting she is doing it herself. Yesterday it was 5 below in NY and she tried to go outside in her nightgown and coat stating she wanted to go on a walk herself. Then statedthatshe was going to a homeless shelter as not to bother anyone. Cries all day and doesnt want to leave her room. I do you deal?

I know this question has been asked before, but since my mom was not at that stage, I didn't pay attention. Well, at 2am this morning, my mom got up to use the restroom. I heard a very loud noise and when I went into the bathroom, she was on the floor. Luckily, no serious injuries that required medical attention. I'm looking for bed alarm recommendations. Thank you in advance for your support.

Comic relief for the moment. Hope it brings a smile to your face in an otherwise somber and stressful time. My mom had just moved in with us after she was found by police in a nightgown and slippers wandering the streets at 3am. My son is 8 and was in an afterschool program. They made chocolates covered marshmallows on a stick. There were 3 in total. He ate one and gave me another when I picked him up. There was a third witch he said was for grandma. It's a 15 minute walk home and he was holding that stick. He kept looking at at it like a dog waiting for his snack and taking itsy bitsy bites from it during our travels. I finally said, "Landon, don't worry, just eat it." His response had me on the floor. "No mom, we have to be nice to grandma if we want her to stay with us forever. Once she says yes, then we can go back to our old ways and hide the snacks(Mind you, there are 2 older brothers who eat everything). What an amazing kid. I guess I don't have to worry when it's my turn, lol. Here is the culprit. On this Thanksgiving, I send love and prayers to those in need, suffering or at a crossroads. First post. My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's at 62 and she is now 65. Are there any preventative tests for me.

Recommedations. I'm looking for advice on medications for moderate to severe Alzheimers, thanks. This is my mom, enjoying a ride at the amusement park. This disease is breaking my heart. This women was fearless. Drove to Canada with two small children before GPS. Ran 2 businesses with little education. Took us on trips, without our dad, to many places. Know she is living with me, and in the mid, on the verge of late stage Alzheimer's. Crys and is depressed due to loss of independence. Lost of bodily functions during the night. Latest is not recognizing the was a door's position to open and closed. I am heartbroken. Luckily I have a husband and three children who help beyond measure. Wouldn't be able to care for her on my own. I was losing my patience and arguing with her on a regular basis due to her mood swings that I to took to heart because I am a pleaser and her actions hurt. I am gratfuly for this group. These post keep me grounded and helps me cope and change my attitude. As the saying goes, you can't change the person but you can change yourself. I pray for all those affected. Thank u all and for those who hesitate, please share. You are making a difference in someone's life, though you may know it or not. God bless and continued prayers. I don't usually post but I need to vent. I just broke down in tears. I take care of my mom who has this dreaded disease. She is now in the habbit of saying that no one tells her anything. I tell her everything and if it is something that I know she would want to be informed about, such as an event, I will tell her several times a day, every day, up untill the day of the event. I even have gone as far as recording her while I'm telling her about it, so I have proof that I have told her. Today, I had it. I told her that I have no reason to not keep her informed. I would not benefit or get any satisfaction in keeping information from her. This is an everyday accusal and it finally wore me down. I told her I was just sick of this daily accusations and I broke down in tears. I know it's not her fault but it still hurts. Thanks for reading this and keep me and my family in your prayers, as I will keep yours. Wishing i could just be the kid and mom could just be the mom

Now my sister has an obsession with brushing her teeth. She keeps going in every 10 to 15 minutes. My sister keeps grinding her teeth. Any ideas on how to get her to stop? My sister doesn’t talk much anymore but she constantly says nope or yep all day long. She says one or the other between 6 and 20 times a minute. Is this normal? It’s driving us crazy. Why does my sister get on my nerves so bad on the weekends? I can’t do anything without her following me around and i just want some peace and quiet. My sister keeps repeating “nope this one” or “nope, not this one” at least 1000 times per day. Is this normal? She dosn’t say much else but it is getting on my nerves. My sister is wound so tight she can’t sit still or stop saying no this one. It’s been a long day and I have a feeling its going to be a long night.

My sister keeps putting one of her rings in her mouth and rolls it around with her tongue. Is this normal?

So my mother just told me that Betsy from home Helpers told her she wouldn’t help out with my sister because she doesn’t do crazies. If Betsy thought my sister was crazy it’s because my mother told her she was. I have bent over backwards to take care of my mother and help her to stay out of a nursing home. She better hope she doesn’t fall again because I’m not keeping her home again. I’m done. Does anyone have suggestions for IPod games? My sister is stage 5/6. Are there things that an alz person in mid to late stages can do on their own? I can’t sit here and entertain my sister all day long. What exactly does an eeg show? My sisters doctor ordered one for her. Every morning I think “I got this” and every evening I think “I cant’t do this anymore.” I am at the end of my rope. She went for a walk while I was in the bathroom. She was wearing pj pants, a hoody and slippers. Now she just went back to her room and put clothes on to go somewhere. I keep telling her it’s Sunday and she’s not going anywhere. Lord help me because I really can’t take much more of this. I’m tired. So so tired. Sometimes I just want to curl up in a ball and cry myself to sleep My sister keeps hitting her leg and it sounds like it hurts. It is really loud and driving me crazy. Heard my mom for the first time start grinding her teeth pretty loud .. is this something to do with the Alzheimer’s desease

Mom is 74 has just started to grind her teeth very hard during the afternoon? What stage is this usually normal? And what advice can you share... I most sure Mom will not tolerate mouth guard Is their signs of when they are going to stop walking...or do they completely stop.... took mom to a small store and she had a couple of moments that she would freeze and just stand their and not move for about 2-3 minutes … Stepping back taking a breath I serve Mom her lunch and it’s a paper plate I don’t want paper plate , change her plate, then its plates to big, then no that’s not my plate , food is to cold , then to hot , tea is to sweet no not that glass 樂and I’m back and fourth biting my tongue fixing what she wants fix so she won’t get angry& combative this is exhausting ..praying patience & strength in my life in Jesus Name Is it normal for Mom to be loosing weight even though she eats 3 very good meals a day and is not extremely active... 3 months ago she was wearing a size 14 pants today I had to get new ones because they were looking big on her.. she is now wearing a size 10 樂 Need advice on the Best way to handle Mom when we make her something to eat she will not want it .. we will make something different and still she won’t want it up to 3 times .. she gets angry because we don’t ask her but when we do she doesn’t know what she wants .. there is so much food wasted and Mom refuses to eat樂

Feeling a heavy heart as momma seems to be loosing weight weekly two weeks ago she was at 26 arm measurements, last week it was 25 and today it was 24 even though she eats though eating less ...this week we had to call plumber as she is flushing her pads ... we are also hearing so much hurtful things that she tells others about us .. she also seems to be giving a blank look more often and her interest in things she used to enjoy have diminished.. my mind is all over the place thinking is this just this week will it be better next week or worse ... reminding myself one day at a time one day at a time Can a Alzheimer patient be fine walking and doing things, get combative and stop eating and drinking lead to the end I’m so worried that mom is not eating like she used to .. she is complaining about everything we give her and won’t eat and maybe grab a little something

My mother was just diagnosed Wednesday with stage 5-6 Alzheimer she is 74 I’m still feeling shocked and scared of the reality of her condition even though I was already somewhat aware something was wrong. I do not know a whole lot on the disease and I’m not sure where to start first or what exactly is best I do not have medical or financial power of attorney nor does she have a living will and can not think what is exactly best for her as far as assistant living her living with me or a facility please any suggestions would be greatly appreciated feeling broken hearted Trying get Everything in order trying find out what moms qualifies for sorting through her finances and finding out she has a reverse mortgage 樂樂 .. any advice? Mom just managed to open one of the locked doors she unscrewed dead bolt from the door with guardian lock in 3 minutes time 樂 she knew to get a screwdriver and use it .. but can not do or understand other things .. I’m puzzled 樂樂How?

My daughter and I had gotten the courage to take mama to the zoo with my 4 year twin grand-babies was it a adventure .. I thought when we first got there it was going to be tuff being that Mom loves to give random people hugs and will talk about random stuff. she also gets super excited to see babies, she will dart right towards them to touch and play with them .. well as soon as we got there it was the very first thing she did luckily the family understood and was very nice and loving to her. We decided to rent the scooter which ended up being the best thing I could possibly do being that she walks and scoots very slow .. once she was on that thing she took off so happy, of course I had hold of the handle to drive her .. needless to say mama had the best time of her life she smiled all the way through as did my grandkids .. at the end my daughter asked her are you tired grandma? and she replied no I’m happy ❤樂 Just learned their is an Alzheimer’s seizure I have never heard of it .. when Do they happen? Do they happen to all Alzheimer’s patience? What happens during the seizure? And what are the signs? Sorry so many questions Been seeing a lot recently about mini strokes in Alzheimer’s patience. I didn’t know this could happen .... what stage do they start occurring and what are the signs .. Learning my mom was addicted to pepto and pain killers , to which we have cleared her home of all over the counter meds lately she has gotten so upset because she wants her pink pill (pepto) and will complain it hurts here and there so I bought a bag of smarties candy for pain killers and Canada mints for pepto. I gave her one of each this morning and she is all better and very happy like nothing is wrong then again this afternoon again.. this is so upsetting to learn and wonder how long she had been doing this 樂樂樂

Mom has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s for about 6 months already though we had already noticed signs since 2014 .. since her prescribe prescription of Donepezil and Memantine I’ve have noticed so much improvements is this possible? Mom before the meds had not been able to do something’s that broke my heart and now she does them like washing dishes, sweeping,carrying a conversation even making a phone call to me and no longer doing things that this disease would cause her to do like hide her wet pads, use a soiled pad to wipe down bathroom now she actually will clean the bathroom with cleaner, walking without cane,...I Praise Jesus for such an improvement ..though I still want to understand is this possible have there been known cases . Mom had been supposedly stage 7 Awesome tip if your needing help with LO taking meds Any insights or experiences on Lorazepam and Seroquel what I should possibly be noticing or keep an eye on? Does anyone use a medical alert? If so what are your reviews? Looking into getting one for my mom, but really know nothing about them and how well they really work?

This morning I was faced with momma going to be needing a little more help .. help that I know mom isn’t going to want ... Mom has always been so private and highly believes someone in the bathroom with her period more so while she showering is so disrespectful.. unfortunately mom is having lots of difficulties bathing ... she also fell last night and Hospice nurse highly recommends a medical bed at this point that it would be really beneficial to her .. again I’m at a road block because mom loves her bed holds it dear because it’s the bed her and dad had pretty much when they first married.. I know the change will upset her though I know it’s what is best ... any suggestions on how or what to do or say to make the transition easy on her 樂樂

Found An awesome fidget thing for very little cost like $5 weaving loom for kids mom really just likes putting the loops on the loom not so much making pot holders but it keeps her busy for a couple of hours . Thought I share .. they also have refill loops but I just take them off and let her reuse them another day .. she had lost interest on coloring and painting so I was on the search for something new to her busy .. she use to love sewing and this is about as close I can get her to fabric without being worried about scissors and needles 樂 I’m thinking of cutting squares of fabric and having her glue on a canvas or poster board 樂 Moms up time dancing to run around sue and moms down time connecting connectors .. sorry now if sound music was blocked Momma enjoying her painting time ...you can see she really concentrated on her painting, though she still had a little difficulty but finished her project 樂樂

This has worked for Mom at least for now assorting and connect these bright disk , Mom has an aggressive Alzheimer’s ..thought maybe might be helpful for anyone thinking of things for your loved one to do .. they are called snowflake interlocking Snowflake Interlocking Disc Connector Set 528 on amazon for like $14

I’m trying to understand where Mom is she has already started hospice comfort care at home, yesterday was first day .. she still walks and feeds herself showers and dresses herself .. though she does have some both incontinence bladder and bowel .. she has lost 12lbs in 2 months .. And i did also pick up on dr and hospice nurse noticing and mentioning something on how she reflex’s of her hand movements when someone places their hand in her hand .. something like an infant what is this all meaning? 樂 Is there a difference from early onset Alzheimer’s, Frontal lobe, and progressive Alzheimer’s? Today (for the first time) I bought my dad adult diapers. He is refusing to wear them. My dad (76 early dementia) says he has to pee all the time, no discomfort. He is afraid to leave the house. Refuses to wear “disposable underwear”. Is this “normal”? I had his urine tested and came back fine.

Hi. I am new to the group, and so thankful to be a part of it. Sharing the ups and downs and very therapeutic. Knowing I am not alone in our struggles, means everything to me! My dad (76) has dementia but waiting for testing to determine which kind. He is in that awkward stage where he is still very aware of what's going on and yet also very confused about what we are trying to do to help him. For example we are trying to put my dad and mom's assets in a trust, and he thinks we are taking his money. He recently transferred all his money from one act to another.....then called me to take him to the bank because someone stole all his money. He cries non stop. He won't let me hire someone to give my mom a break and won't consider moving to a memory care facility. Yet he is so miserable. Can I force him into a facility because I know it will be best for him? Feeling helpless, Beth Great visit with my dad today!!-Daddy’s Girl forever!! Dad has horrible bed sores on his bum. Tips? Suggestions?

Please help! My dad (76) won't stop crying. We have an appointment tomorrow with his Dr. to review his meds. Any suggestions? Medicine or otherwise? I hate seeing him like this! Non stop sobbing!!

Anyone have any luck with medical marijuana? If so, can you give details on what you or your loved one uses? I just got my dad a card, confused what % cbd vs thc to get him. Thanks in advance!!! Worst moment of my life....had to call 911 to take my father away. He is threatening to kill himself and is mentally abusing my mom. I am at such a loss. I can't find a good Psychiatrist here (south florida) that cares about him. He is on way too much medication, and NOTHING is helping him. So mean and angry all the time. Sobs constantly, begging for his life to end. Where is that sweet man that I have known all my life? I miss my dad!

Ok my dad was diagnosed with frontal lobe dementia over a year ago. He cries and begs for death all day. My mom just doesn’t get the disease. She is so impatient with him. Always frustrated with him. What BOOK do you recommend to help her better understand him and how to help him?? She is not good on the internet. Many thanks!! ❤樂 樂 樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂樂 My dad (76) was diagnosed with early Alzheimer’s 3 months ago. But now, a different doctor says he has Frontal Lobe Dementia. What’s the difference? Does anyone’s LO have frontal lobe dementia? So confused!!! 樂 Mom is in respite care to get her medication under control. Doctor gives her 4-6 weeks before passing on. All her medical problems are catching up. I am trying to be strong for my dad. They would be celebrating their 50th Anniversary in May. This is a hard time between the holidays and my birthday in January. Thank you for letting me talk! Got this from Really Good Stuff to help my mom remember Days of the Week, Seasons, Months and the Date! Hospital bed arrived today! The past few days have been very hard. It’s so hard when she refuses her medication and my husband argues with the hospice team how she must take it! I just want to run away and cry somewhere! Pissed off because my mom was at the doctors and when she got home she was having speech and other problems. Called an ambulance and they took her to the hospital. She has a UTI. I want to scream at her doctor! He won’t officially diagnose her with dementia but she sundowns almost every night. I am mad!樂 So upset because we can’t get help for my mom so it looks like she will have to go to the NH. Last time she was up there she got very sick and now they will get the house! So mom is being admitted into the hospital again because she is not able to fight the Uti infection. How much more can I handle?

I hate this disease so much! It has turned my mom into such a mean person! All I want to do is cry! It’s so hard seeing my mom like this. Even the dog knows something is not right! So hard listening to my mom telling my dad how she’s afraid of me. She told me today not to talk to her! So I decided that’s fine for me not to talk but then don’t ask me for anything either!

It’s so frustrating when someone doesn’t know what dementia is like because he wasn’t around to see his father go through it. My mom has Late onset dementia and has episodes at night. She yelled for everyone to be quiet while we were sitting in the living room with my brother in law and sister in law. His brother watched his dad go through dementia and was trying to talk to him about it. My husband totally blew up at his brother and told him if she can’t act normal then she shouldn’t be in normal society and be locked up in a dementia ward. It is so upsetting to me. Trying to get by one day at a time.

Keep them busy, encourage them...my mom was a "mom". She was never much of a joiner, but oh how she loved to take care of her family. So here is an example of how you can include your loved one and stimulate them through tasking. Give clear instructions, tell them how well they are doing, thank them for helping. My mom is in the dementia care facility and when they return her clothes clean, they know i have her help put them away. Just wanted to share this video to help people understand people with dementia are capable and believe it or not, want to help. Thought this could be helpful樂

I share this to show that no matter what Dementia and Alzheimer's thinks it's powers are, God is always with US and our loved ones. I crocheted a blanket for my daughter and my mom was able to remember the Lords prayer. Never stop praying with them, speaking with them, playing music they love for them...my mom is in hospice care and non verbal, but God spoke through her this day...it was a good day樂 Your final journey to peace. Mommy, in my life, I love you more... The clouds have parted for you. Take the Lord's hand, you're almost free. I got this…

Sitting, reflecting, the sun on my face...listening to the cardinal chirp. I know what she sounds like. I just can't see her. Mom, I miss you, but today is a good day to to have a good day. I hear you, but just like that cardinal I can't see you樂 strength...Yup, that is what we have. Hang on tight people. It'll be ok. I wanted to share this post since my mom passed. I thought maybe it could help those struggling with their first mother's day without their mom like I did... 樂 And off she went...With peace in her heart and a lifetime of memories. Now for her work to really begin under the hand of God. Watch over us mommy. You are the love of my life and will be with me till my last breath. After my mom passed away this past October, as a caregiver, I am learning my way back. I made a video and started a page on self-care to share struggles if anyone is interested. I hope this is ok. I'm not selling anything, just looking to help others going through the same thing I did. My page is called Self Care, Thankful, grateful. <3 This book changed my life dealing with my mom's frontal temporal lobe dementia. It's written by Virginia Bell & David troxel. It's not a depressing book about caregiving, it's about helping you live in your loved one's world. It's called A Dignified Life The best friend's approach to dementia❤ This was me bringing my mom back home to the Bristal from the hospital. She is non-verbal, but music and her smile speaks volumes. My mom is in end stage care for Pancreatic cancer since this video back in May. She still loves music. Never give up, cherish and document moments like this so you can appreciate the good days.樂

I wanted to share this video I made. I posted it on facebook as I have been taking care of my mom for 8 years now. My mom is only 70 years old and in her final days. I hope this helps you to see how getting care for your loved one is truly the most selfless thing you can do for them. I have 2 sick parents and have researched for years to give my parents the best care I can give. If you cannot afford an Atria or Bristal please utilize a free service called A place for Mom. They find you affordable care for your loved one. It is SO important to scout out the facilities and be aware of how the staff treats the residents instead of the amenities they provide. You are a strong person for taking this care on your shoulders. Make sure that you remember to take care of you. I had to be put on 3 medications for anxiety and depression to realize I needed help. ***Also, a fact not many people know, Medicare does not pay for lockdown facilities, but due to the necessity for it, it is tax deductible as are all their medical costs.<3 I hope this helps. I pray for all of you that you may find peace with this disease with love and knowledge. xo This is my mother and I. Took her out of the nursing home for a treat. Hanging out with mom at nursing home! She loves my Halloween teeth!!樂樂 This is me right now with mom at the nursing home trying to have a good time with her even though my head feels like its gonna explode. Birthday girl is 85!!!! Thank you God for allowing her to celebrate another year!!

Happy Mother's Day to my mother Rosita!! Thank you God for allowing us to spend another year together!

Early Friday morning my beautiful queen was called upon to return back home in heaven. My heart is broken,destroyed,and I feel,lost. I know she is happy to be with my father and be able to walk again but the pain in my heart is so deep that it's hard to accept. I love you mami,my queen. RIP ROSALIA樂樂 My mom singing to me at the nursing home! This is moms look today樂樂 Lol! Mom in the gangster life樂樂! My daughter loves doing the filters with her! She finally let me do a little video of herself!!

Mom looking cute,being silly!! She said omg look how pale I am next to you. Ummm I am also pale!! 樂 My mom with alot of sass today!

Almost 2 weeks straight with a migraine that feels like something is chewing the left side of my head. Stress is slowing killing me. Not having a job yet,bills,trying to keep everyone happy,and seeing my mom slowly going into her own world is really taking its toll on me. I try to keep a happy face up for everyone and do my best to do for everyone. I feel like my head is gonna explode. Can barely sleep because I can shut my brain off. Trying to keep mom safe and happy while she is still here with us but sometimes there is nothing I can do to make her happy which makes me feel like I'm failing her. I try to stay positive,and I pray everyday for some peace in my life. Idk what to think or say anymore so I give everyone around me the silent treatment at times just so I end up saying something wrong. This is my cutie mother!! She is always smiling once she sees my husband and I walk in. Well the antibiotics are working and the uti weirdness is better. But ... she stumbled and fell today. Doesnt pick up her feet enough. Lucy was right there with her but it happens fast. Big ole goose egg of a bump on her forehead, so a little ER trip and back home. Nothing broken and no internal bleed. Good bones. (She's on a blood thinner so we needed to check.) Its a blockbuster goose egg though. No fussing abt taking her meds though. Yea.

After weeks of working to get moms food intake and fluids, back up to an acceptable amount and was finally there this week. Five 8 oz fluid and just enough to not loose weight. Yesterday she woke up and refused any fluids or food. Still talking. (Made up stories) and walking enough with assistance, to go to bathroom or from wheelchair to comphy lift chair. Dont know what happened. I suspect a mini stroke. Maybe just the alz. But mostly it seems to be a mindset. The more you offer it, the more she's sure she doesnt want it. Sigh. I've gotten her back twice. Didnt think she would bouce back last time but she did. If I cant get her to change her mind, this is the last downhill slide. Wont do iv again. Here's hoping she starts drinking again. Celebrating just a bit. Mom actually asked for food tonight. A scrambled egg. She ate toast, half a slice of bacon and at least half the egg. Yea! Hey. We celebrate where and when we can. She had a bad turn abt 2 weeks ago. Faint. Weak. Very. Wouldnt eat. Hardly drink. A-fib worse. Couldnt walk to the bathroom without help. Big huge change. Just all of a sudden. This came 2 weeks after a med change. I changed her back hoping it would turn her around. A week goes by and i had the nurse out again and also her MD. No sign of stroke. Personally I think it was a mini. Doc put her on an anribiotic because there was some sound of fluid in her lungs. Not much but antibiotic wouldnt hurt. And i asked for nausea med for her because when i offer food she would say she just couldn't. She would throw up if I made her. (She and dad never said things straight out). Betw the meds and nagging her to eat to get stronger. I'm a loving nag when i need to be. Shes gotten a bit stronger. Just a tiny bit. But tonight she actually asked for food. 8:45 pm but hey, I dont care. I cooked and she ate. Yea!!! I know... Shes not going to get back to where she was. But i can have a while longer with her now. Kinda strange. Shes actually been clearer. Knows me most of the time. Knows cheri's coming to visit. Knows shes

I wake up to the sound of mom wandering the hallway, saying " Is anybody here ?" I can hear what sounds like trying to use the phone. She doesnt remember how . She picks it up and starts talking. Asking for something. Its too early. I pretend to be asleep. Just a few more minutes please. The front door opens and closes. Moms in front asking if anyone is here. Such a sad sound. But i hear it all day long. You dont become immune exactly, but you must breathe. I hear it if I leave her sight for one minute going to the bathroon or cooking or cleaning or stepping outside or breathing. So i wait. Wait to begin my day. She comes down the hall. Finds my door . Guess my day begins early today. Im up. Give her a hug. She's so glad to see / find someone. I walk to the kitchen too see if she plugged in the perculator. She did today. I made it up the night before as usual. She remembers perculators which is why I use it. Mother is following. I pour her a fresh cup. Set her down. Microwave a fruit danish for her. Walk to the back door to let the dog out as her eyes follow. She wants to know who she is. I give her full name but tell her shes mom to me. I head to the bathroom. I hear " is anybody here?". My day has started. 2 yrs ago and now. Happy 90th mom ! Wanted to share this resource. Teepa Snow on How to deescalate a crisis. What is Dementia. Tips for caregivers. Words to use. The different types of dementia and why knowing matters on YouTube. She has lots of tips and ideas and other video's that I've found helpful. Go to youtube.com and go to search and search by her name: Teepa Snow. Well ... Moms first uti for the year ! Its a big improvement. We were doing every 6 weeks. Hard getting enough liquids in her. We go to the bathroom with her and do the wiping/ cleaning. Tmi? Lol. Cut back on sweets but some cant be helped. Hard to get enough food in. Started doing a spiced tea in the mornings. Hot green or a decaf tea , touch of honey, some cinnamon, dash of ginger, drops of vanilla, cbd drops, sometimes some lemmon. I think it helps. But Unfortunatly we r there again. Imaginary people, poisoned food, bad guys, sigh. Antibiotics kick in please. Ever try cbd oil? Have you found it affective? Mom has alzheimers. Later stage. I suffer from tmj. Jaw joint pain. UGH. Started from clenching my teeth at night in my sleep from back pain. Back pain from straining it when i cleaned out the freezer. Re- straining from when i had picked up mom. Lol. Old age is for the birds! Anyway, my back is finally better ( took long enough) but the tmj goes on. It's better than when it started, but I'm ready for it to be gone too! No fun. I bought some of that expensive cbd oil. Heard its good for dementia patients (sundowning) and their anxiety. but I tried it on me first. To see if it would help me quit clenching my jaw at night. Man oh man. I slept all the way through the night. it did not make me feel sleepy and I took it early. 6pm. I go to bed late. Its 'me' time after mom goes to bed. First time in quite awhile that I slept that well. Jaw is better too! No weird or unweird side affect. That stuff is expensive but seems worth it. Comes in different milligram levels ( 500, 1000 & 1500 milligram) and flavors. Moms pharmacist makes it himself. Just started. ( I'm in Tx) Had me laughing cause he was so excited abt all the flavors he was making. I'll try it on mom next though she doesnt sundown that badly. Some days her Mom asks " why do I have to take that pill? I don't like it. It makes me sleepy. I dont like pills." She's kindof herself in the mornings. So I explain. I know. I cut it in half. And I'll work with the doc to find something better but for now you need this. It's for anxiety. Without it, you have a bad day. Then I have a bad day. We all have a really bad day. " but why?" Because you get confused. Then scared. Then loud and a bit mean. Sorry . This will help. " ok. If you say it, it must be true. I trust you." Thank you mom. Love you. Its going to be a good day. 樂

Anyone used 'nitrofuranton mono 100 mg' (extended 22 hr release) for an uti on a lo with alzheimers And got a weird agitated and manic reaction? I had to give her the abh cream ( which has benadryl in it) to bring her down to a level to get her to go to bed last night. Whew. Its not listed as a possible side affect. Nothing like that is listed. She is not experiencing any of the listed side affects.

Prayers for mom please. Its heart, I think, mor than the alzheimers. A fib. Change in meds precipitated this I believe. Changed them back. Was ok a week ago. . now... A-fib is worse, No appetite. Stomach upset. Refuses to eat. Doesnt drink enough. Doesnt eat. though i can usually get an ensure down. Too out of breath to walk much. Oxygen blood levels ok. Blood pressure too. Ankles swollen. Back on water pill. I know i cant reverse alzheimers but hope a fib gets under control. Just want to say thanks for those who posted abt meditations. Came in handy today. My mom has started some serious sundowner syndrome and I just cant deal with another all day episode. Ive got the new prescription and cream will be here tomorrow. Fingers crossed. Has anyone else noticed how much better your lo is when on antibiotics? You think its the anti inflammatory property if them or could they actually be doing something to fight the viral property of alz? Afraid mom is on the down hill slide. Ever since her hospital stay abt 3 or is it 4 months ago after a series of falls, she's been up and down with her food intake and fluids. One day bad, nasious, not eating or drinking, then back up again in the next day or two. . But each recovery is not quite up to the food intake of before. Still walking (with help) and talking. Strong willed lady. Food intake is very little now. Hard to even get her to drink ensure. Wanting to go to the bathroom often but it is not a uti. Checked. Think its because she eats so little but her body wants to have a bowel movement anyway. She does eat half a bananna a day usually, for the fiber but its not enough even with some benefiber in a drink once a day, I dont know if its the alz, or her a-fib (heart) or maybe even mini strokes. She's on hospice and I'm not having any tests done of that nature.. As hard and terrible and scary as it feels, it is prob best to let it be and let her go. I could push it and treat it and prolong her misery but she wants to go home. I keep offering the food and drink. Sometimes she takes a bite. These days, mostly not. But she's rebounded several times, but that may not happen this time. The up and down trend is mostly down. I don't want her to go yet. But she really already has. Why is it Wish i could hire help that was actually help. Hospice doesnt show up till afternoon. Ive been listening to mom wanting to get dressed for 3 hours now. Seems an eternity! The hired help isnt coming in cause her car is in the shop. She heard me say the other one couldnt come in last tuesday for that reason . This after she couldn't come in last Monday or Wednesday or Thursday, because her blood pressure was off and she didnt feel well. This tuesday is the 4th so the other one isnt coming in. Comes late. Leaves early. Other jobs . Calls with last minute changes. Only worked here 2 1/2 weeks. I said i was flexable but not that flexable! AGH!!! Nope. Didnt make me feel better to say it ... time for a new ad. Problem is , we live in the country between towns. Hard to get good help. End of gripe session. Sigh. Thanks for listening . Been an interesting week. Not. Mom hasn't felt well. Uti. Antibiotic ,while it helped uti, made her , mmmm, misbehave and uncooperative. Combative. She was doing that already. Got her off that after 5.5 days. Ok for a couple of days. Then she was nauseous, not eating or drinking. Weak. No virus going around here. She slept all day yesterday. Finally got her to take a nasea pill and drink some. Then finally eat just a bit. She felt better. Awake all last night. But ok today. Hoping she's abt to take a nap, but she's trying hard to stay awake. Cant nap till she does, cause shes able to stand and walk a tiny bit and will prob fall. Sigh. I could use a nap. She's eating some today at least and is being pleasant. Her ears are stopped up. Hate when she cant hear. Makes everything harder. Been doing drops to loosen ear wax. Not working. Called My bro last sunday. Left msg. Did the same today. No call backs. Mom has announced out of the blue that he's in the hospital. I'm thinking she's prob right. Has health problems. Bro says he's not burdening me when crap happens cause I have enough on my plate but not knowing and not hearing does not lighten my load! Makes me feel even more cut off from the world and lonely. I think he also wants to distance himself from all this. Sigh. Ok. I know he does. Got taken on a sales deal but its ok I guess. Live and learn . Got an attempted scam call abt ss. They havent called back. Other stuff too. Tmi. Lol. Bad week. Too late for my mom in later stage but OMG I'm estatic. Have you been reading abt the ultrasound treatment? Ill copy one over. I dont know where exactly, but the clinical trials have begun for ultrasound treatment which has shown very promising results in lab tests. Limited Trials in process in the US and Canada for those in early & mild stage if Alzheimer's dementia. 6 in the US. I live with my 87 yrs of age mom with Alzheimers. Time runs in mysterious circles for her. No short term memory. She lives in the "now". Sometimes she knows me. Mostly not. Mostly I'm a friend helping her or a traveling companion or maybe a nurse. Sometimes she knows my siblings. Certainly the names if not the current faces. She talks abt going to see her dad before he dies. He was gone long long ago. Sometimes she speaks of her illness like it was before I was born . She spent time in a facility getting over TB in her youth. She asks if she's getting better. So Mom asked if anyone was coming to see her today. Joe & Barb couldn't make it during the holiday. Storm & power ourage. Richard & Tina and the kids didnt make it. Rick didnt feel well. Working too hard. Has health issues. I worry abt him. Cheri had been up earlier in the week but she can't remember. Told mom they'd be up later. She said " I may not see them again but that's ok. I have my memories. I hope they grew up straight and strong and on the right path. The right path is important. If they did that, they will be ok. " - Oh so sad, but oh so sweet! - I cherish the time I have. I went for a walk today. Its a big deal . Im moms' live in 24 hr caregiver. Im not an early riser and i wont go walking alone down a country road at night. (Especially in the spring. You country kids know. The snakes and other critters go there for warmth). Ive been letting moms needs and fears over ride what i need. She is afraid to loose me even if she doesnt really know who i am. Im her best friend and shes in a place she doesnt know. Home. Cant stand for me to leave the room. For a whole year, ive let her call the shots. I havent had a real day off. Yes i have a couple of ladies come in for a few hours, a couple of days each. I go to the store or stores, a rare evening once in awhile. But then im back home, and it feels like prison sometimes. My fault, not moms. Ive let her fears and my imagination get in the way. ( i worry that she will get up and look for me and fall or try to wander away and fall. ) so ive stayed right by her side. Cant even hardly go to the bathroon without a " is anybody here?" Which is just heartbreaking to hear ... And super annoying too. Sigh ... I can sweep, mop, do dishes, well ... Some, cook if i keep coming back into the room to tell her what im doing, grrrrrrr, or sit her in the kitchen with me. Siamese twins. Getting old. I feel really really old. And lonely, and getting fatter cause she wont eat unkess i set the example. But i eat. She takes 2 bites and stops. Thus I'm getting bigger as she disappears. ACK !!!!!

Whew. Right now, mom is bat sh* crazy. Mad abt a kiddie show where I, apparently, am responsible for bad behavior and animals being mistreated, and lies, and worse ... Not admitting my guilt. soooo, im on the porch waiting for the pill i gave her to kick in ( i think she got it down) or she wears herself out. All out of abh cream. Turned lights down. Leaving her in her comphy lift chair with blanket. Mad at me for turning lights down and not staying to fight with her. Gotta laugh and sigh. My oh my. She doesnt walk that well so not going anywhere. Front door locked and blocked. So ... Settle in and wait her out. My puppy is scared and staying with me. Poor pepe. Kitty has hidden. Not that mom could hurt anything but animals know crazy when they hear it. She's getting quiet now. No one to fight with. Not that it stops her when shes on a roll sometimes... Think I'll take a peak in. Crying just a bit this morn . Bad day n night. I hate having to get up early so i can catch my mom when she first wakes up, groggy, to get her pills down her, to drug her, so we don't have to have another suspicious , I'm the bad guy, bad day. And it doesn't always work cause they wear off. God I hope the new medication does better. And I dont know why I bother asking god. I dont believe anymore. No merciful god would allow this. She was a kind & christian lady who found comfort in going to church. Its slow and torturous. To her. To me. To the rest of the family. She afraid. She doesnt know me or her place or whats going on so her mind congers up a kidnapper. Me. Who holds her here against her will when all she wants is to go home. Usually to her dad. Sometimes to her husband and becky. That me. Becky. But I'm not her. To her. Sigh. . . Maybe the new med and gel will help. - Sorry. You're my therapy and release today. Ill be better now and get on with the business of helping and protecting her, even from herself. ... I'm tired. Just hired new help. But if i cant get this under control, the help wont be able to help or deal with her. She doesnt want help. Says she's not sick and not a child. Screams for them to go. Stands on the sidewalk and yells for the police. Just so you get the picture . More sighs ... . Those times when you need a shoulder to rest your head, a hand in yours to not feel alone, or just a caring ear to listen. A Hug ... People often think of me as strong, I'm not anymore. Youths strength gives way to mature understanding of how things work. ... I'm not tilting at the wind all the time as it sometime appears ... I'm falling, but the storm wind is holding me up ... Use the storm. Lean on me friend and I'll lean back and together we can stand. Have any of you experienced not being able to get shoes on your loved one. My husbands feet are swollen and have been now for over a month. Doctor is aware of this and is tring to get the fluid down. My question is winter is coming upon us and we have a wedding reception to go to,In a month. What am I going to get for shoes to put on him. Do any of you recommend a pair of elastic waist jeans for men. His length is only a 29. Im going to try full elastic verses his zip blue jeans. His other ones he cant keep up where they belong,and then rips out the seat in them I have a question for our caretakers. What kind of socks do you buy for your loved ones. It was hard last year to get them on my husband, and just wondering if there is a good easy kind to get on. He doesn't wear in the summer How was your loved one before they became bed ridden? My husband can hardly walk. Comprehension is barely nothing. I just am getting to the point I am lost for answers. How do you go about getting a care giver? How expensive are they? I am now going on the third day of nothing but nasty behavior coming from my husband. It is more then I can take. Very hateful towards me. I am actually scared that he will do something. Have any of you tried respite care? Wondering since VA denied my husband health benefits,if he might be able to get respite care

Has anyone experienced their loved one refusing there meds. I seen it coming with him spitting them back into water glass,but this morning put the icing on the cake. He spit them all back out at me. Tring to stay calm i just kept talking to him real soft. Finally I got him to take them all. Such confusion. I guess I am going to have to try apple sauce. Any other sugestions are sure welcome. How many of your loved ones are on namenda? How do they do on it?

UGH I am to my wits end. Bad day today. my husband has addemia in his left foot. Doctor has not looked at it but wants him to have a echo done on friday to see if its his heart . If heart is fine then they are going to lean towards circulation problem. He says it hurts him. He is very aggitated,and today he peed his pants for the first time. Wonder if I should wait till the echo on Friday or try to have Doc look at it tomorrow. With holiday probably wont know results till Tuesday/ Having a bad day! So sick of my husband grabbing me everytime something doesnt go his way.This morning i got fed up when he was grabbing my arms and through my arms up in the air,which hit his glasses and now he has a nice scratch on his nose from his glasses. I am just fed up trying the best I can to help him and he reacts with anger. Putting him in a home will just make him worse. I have a call into my Doctor to see if he can change his meds to calm him down some more. There I got my vent done. Feeling exhausted!!

I need advice. Mom is in memory care facility. They are supposed to be toileting her. Each time I go there lately she is wet and her depends are wet, I change her and clean her up, but for the last 3 days her bedding is all wet and they have to wash it. Is there a brand of diapers that work best especially at night? Is your loved one completely incontinent? Last night I wrote a post about incontinence. I was curious of which brand works best. Couple of things. My mom is in memory care because she is safe there and she actually is happy there with all her activities. I work, my dad cared for her at home as long as he could. He will be 86 soon and we,worried about his health. He sees her every day and has lunch with her. Stays for a few hours. I see her every other evening and have her at my home for Sunday lunches and visits. I broke my ankle a week ago and am at the mercy of whoever can drive me until I can drive again. I work with dementia clients. I strongly suggest a lot of you educate yourself on this disease. Best thing you will ever do for yourself. I have to take my recertification every year. This is a disease. Please stop making this about yourselves and once you figure that out your life will be easier. They can not help how they behave. Try looking at it like,a,toddler. You have to always be prepared. Putting mom in memory care was the best decision,and very tricky as well. Mom is insulin dependent type 1 for 56 years. A lot for my dad to take on. But he wanted to care for her as long as he could.,It was not an easy decision to make. It is not helpful to have comments that say they would never Do you have issues with nurses calling you back? I will call about mom not getting a shower and some other issues and usually never call me back. Moms been in a memory care facility since end of August and I hardly ever call but to not call me back just seems rude. Mom is also type 1 diabetic so of course we have extra concerns. Just need advise on how to handle this. My mom is type 1 diabetic for 55 years, we just moved her to memory care and realizing how difficult this seems to be They offer her soda even though she can't have it. They have called my dad at 9:30 on Sunday night because they did not know what to do with her because her blood sugar was 62...really!? I specifically ask if they are able to take care of her. They sure make it sound good but once you sign that dotted line....another story!

My mom is in memory care, dad sees her every day and has lunch with her. I see her every other day. Lately she has been weepy has this happened to any of your loved ones? She has been happy there and seems fine she has been there for about a year and a half and adjusted very well when we moved her, this is just within the last couple months, not all the time but today was one of those days. Breaks my heart

So mom has vascular dementia for about 8 years? Hard to tell how long. She is also a type 1 diabetic for 56 years. We moved her in to memory care facility in August and had some issues. She qualified for hospice a few weeks ago and they have been wonderful. The Hospice nurse recommended we take mom off her Aricept, Namenda and her stations for her cholesterol, as the stations can raise blood sugars. Well mom mom is so much better off these meds. She is not vacant anymore and much more interactive and seems stronger and happier. Anyone else experience anything like this? I am so sad for my dad that had lovingly taken care of my mom for so long. She is nearing last stage and her type 1 diabetes is not well either..my heart is broken but it is doubly broken for my dad. What will become of him? His whole married life he had taken care of her. 85 years old and not many friends..he is such a private man but so kind. Ugh! I broke my ankle and can't get up to see my mom! Can't drive and I live in a house with lots of stairs. This stinks!! I am so thankful my dad goes up every day and spends a few hours with her bit I would go on the evenings..I worry about her so much. My dad is taking her out to visit at my house on Sunday and I can't wait!! But I did so much for her and now I can't..breaking my heart

Feeling anxious. My mom fell on Monday, than the restricted visitors because of stomach bug. Went there yesterday and picked up moms soiled clothing and washed them ( they left them soiled in her laundry basket). She is also type 1 diabetic for 56 years. She was off yesterday and blood sugar was lower than I would like at dinner..prob not much appetite yet. Today I want to return clothing and check on her and now a different sign that says no visitors for influenza A now.. Mom is in the memory care portion and I am praying she is ok, my dad sees her every day for lunch and a couple hours and I go every other day. I just have to trust but it is so hard. Had our first care conference for mom today. Mom went in memory care in August.,She is also a type 1 diabetic for 56 years. My dad helped her at home as much as he could and we all helped but ultimately he got no sleep. Mom is comfortable there and dad has lunch with her every day. Stays for a few hours, I go if not every day, every other day. We see her slipping from us a little each week. She still knows who we are but not too verbal. Our meeting was tough but a good meeting. She was placed on hospice last week. Its is tough for my dad to let go of things he has helped with to have her live this long. We want her to have a good quality of life while still here but dad does not want her to have treats, because of her blood sugars etc. They were giving her pop and we do not want that, a treat but not pop. She was seeing out sugars all last week. So no pop but maybe some treats. Thus has been such a difficult journey for me. I have taken care of mom most of my life...I will feel so empty and so will my dad. I am so glad you are here for me. Tough sometimes as I am trying to be strong for my dad. My mom,always had low blood sugars and never wanted to have high numbers because of articles she read and research with a strong correlation between

I went up this afternoon to see mom and she was napping. When she woke up she was so weepy, I asked her what was wrong and she said she was so sad..juat crying so hard it broke my heart. She is not normally like this. I am having a hard night. She was okay when I left but it just made me so sad..樂 My mom had a wonderful day. She was feeling so good today. ❤ No matter what else my mum in law forgets...she still obsesses about having brandy...drives me mad. Running out of distraction theory's. She throws a paddy in every shop coz I won't get her some.....anyone else witnessed obsessions with things.... So just asking...my mum in law is at the apathy stage....most days doesn't get dressed...happy to sit on the sofa watch tv while dad in law does EVERYTHING.. for her...is it better to leave her if she's happy..she can get nasty I think if he tries to get her to get dressed...I think he leaves her for a quiet life. Very difficult to know what is best.. advice please x You know....seriously. .what if this is as good as it gets..... 樂 So we are taking my in laws on holiday to Cornwall in may.. mil has alzheimer's...worried that taking her out of familiar surroundings might make her worse..

Hi. Thank you for accepting me into the group. My mum in law is 83 with Alzheimer's and dad in law at 85 her full time career.. there are sons I'm married to the middle one. Finding it very hard to encourage them to get out in to fresh a8r and sunshine and to keep up fluids and regular meals...very frustrating. Don't think he realises how bad things could get. Any advice and support is welcome 樂. Got mum in law on holiday in Cornwall this week...took her to Trebah Gardens where they lent us this electric wheelchair...was amazing..couldn't have got her there without it...she may not remember but we always will 樂樂樂 My mum in law has been on doneprizil for about 2 years and no real follow ups from gp. I am taking her for a review 26/11. What should I ask them to check?? She is getting worse. Doesn't get dressed most days. Just sits and watches tv. 樂 Honestly...no matter how hard I try to make life better for my mum in law...its not going to make a difference to the outcome..樂 So my mum in law has alzheimer's...I often go at the weekends and take her into town...when it comes to paying she just hands me her card and asks me to do it.. I was away at the weekend but my son and daughter in law went to see her and took their kids.. she tells my daughter in law....that Carole she knows all my personal details and all my card numbers...its just not right...not even sure if her and David are still together.... Makes me feel like she doesn't trust me.. and feel like not taking her anymore...I am the only person who has the patience to take her out shopping...樂

Don't ask questions....learn from your loved ones as the experts on their own disabilities..always agree with what they say and don't interrupt them...C.A.R.E. ...continuing acceptable recycled experiences... Quotes from a book I'm reading...Contented Dimentia by Oliver James...makes a lot of sense..highly recommend. So mum in law has Alzheimer's....she is on donezipril tablets. She has recently been in hospital over night and had an ultrasound. And then back for an mri scan due to stomach pains...still no results. Dad in law done some "research" into tablets...and has decided that the tablets side effects are causing the stomach problems and her loss of appetite and her tendency to nap in the daytime...so he hasn't given them to her for 2 days!!!....help樂樂樂樂

Taking mum in law for cataract surgery today...hope all goes ok...... 樂樂...so update..took her..but as the hospitals don't talk to each other...cant be done as no surgery within 4 months of heart attack, which she had on 10th July. Waste of unpaid leave from work and four hours of the day...feeling frustrated.. My mum in law is in hospital after having a minor heart attack yesterday and cant remember why shes there 樂樂 This journey is like dante's inferno...and we never know what we are going to have to deal with from one hour to the next 樂樂 Just asking....what do carers do when they feel like you're not coping very well. 樂 It seems this disease as it goes on gets harder for us carers than it does for our lo's...樂 Whilst walking my mum in law from car park to drs surgery..her walking stick one side and linking my arm on the other..she squeezed my arm and says...."I don't know what I'd do without you "...little moments like that mean such a lot. 樂樂樂 My father moved in with me yesterday, straight from rehab, recovering from a broken hip, broken shoulder and broken wrist. He's not strong enough to move by himself and is 145lbs of dead weight. It took me an hour to change his diaper, clothes and sheets!! Help!! My back feels like it's breaking!! I need all of your tips and tricks! Please and thank you!!

I just completed the first week of my father living with me. The first few days after he moved in were filled with a lot of tears and aches and pains from trying to maneuver him while I changed his diaper, clothes and bedding. It's getting easier and taking less time. The first day took me AN HOUR AND A HALF to change everything and tonight only took me a half hour. I'm learning technique is key, plus I need to strengthen my back more. Thank you all for your words of encouragement, support, tips, tricks and ideas. I've spent the last few weeks preparing for my fathers discharge and him moving in with me, I've also spent the last few weeks preparing for the launch of my brand new business. The universe was testing me and my father was discharged on my launch day!! Neither could be postponed!! I knew I'd have some major juggling to do, but never in my wildest dreams thought it'd be so difficult. I've raised 6 children and even some of my grandchildren, so figured this would be a walk in the park since I've basically spent my life taking care of children, teenagers and adult children. But nothing has prepared me for taking care of an immobile dementia parent WHILE I work my new business!! And I still have some teenagers living at home. Thankfully I'm a positive person and a hard worker, but I still want to utilize all the resources I possibly can so I can keep my positivity (and my sanity). I'm on hospice, not thrilled with them so far, but hopefully it'll get better. How does respite work? Do any of you use respite? Although he is mostly blind from macular degeneration that he has along with Dementia, I always make my dads food pretty so he knows he's special ❤ Does anyone have a quick overview of the different stages of Dementia?

I'm desperate, please help!! My father has Dementia, I don't know what type, but it's accelerating by the day and getting worse and worse. His Sundowners is almost unbearable for me and my mom to handle. We are very apprehensive about giving him medication because we've heard it could make him worse and possibly even violent. Please let me know what type of medication you give your loved one and what side effects they have. I am hell-bent on healing my father! Everyone says he's at stage seven and declining, I'm not ready and he's not either! Who is using medical marijuana to help your loved one? I'm not talking about just making them comfortable, I'm talking about helping them and healing them. If so, please comment what you're giving them and how much. Is anyone else in here a Grieving Mother and scared to death to lose another loved one? I lost my 21 year old daughter to suicide and I'm still trying to cope and endure that loss. I can't even imagine what my heart and soul will be like when I lose my father too since my heart is completely broken 樂 My father is getting discharged Friday and moving in with me. Doctors and nurses are suggesting hospice and kindred hospice to get as much support as possible, but he still has many years ahead of him. Who knows how they work these days? It's hard to get past the "end of life" stigma? I am unfortunately getting a lesson on the true meaning of "family". If a parent has dementia and needs 24/7 care, and if one of the 3 children is providing that care (ME), doesn't it make sense that the siblings would help in any other way they can? Bring over some meals, order some pizzas, help with the expense of some health aids or some extra help around the house, errands, anything, anything at all to help and support!! What is the sense of having a large Italian family if all of the work and responsibility falls on one person and everybody else just comes over to "visit"?? AND.....they will come "visit" empty-handed and during meal time!! Sorry, I know I'm not crazy, I know that it shouldn't be like this! Is it customary for Hospice to "show" you and "teach" you how to take care of your LO? I was lead to believe by the liaison that they provide EVERYTHING to make this transition as easy as possible for me. But when they transported him to my house yesterday, they had a nurse come by to check him and get his history, but didn't offer to show me how to take care of a bedridden parent. I'm also now learning from this AMAZING group and all of you amazing people (❤) that there is a lift available for patients like him. Wouldn't that be something the liaison should have offered and suggested before setting me up to fail?

42 days ago my father was walking, talking, eating by himself and living a fairly normal life with a mild amount of dementia. Then he fell, broke his hip, had emergency surgery and the anesthesia expedited his dementia to the point of him being 100% immobile, 100% dependent on me and dying in my arms last night. He was my hero and I am crushed and devastated beyond belief! My life will never be the same!! I was only in this group for a short amount of time and I want to thank everybody for the love and support that you have showed me and each other. I can't continue in here; as I need to attempt to keep his memory alive, but not reliving this last 42 days of hell, watching my father disintegrate more and more every day. Anyone that felt any type of connection with me, please comment below and I will add you to my friends list so we can still keep in touch, stay in each other's lives, but it doesn't have to be while rehashing this monster disease. 樂 PLEASE HELP ME HELP MY DAD!!! My dad has been talking repetitively for 48 hours, non-stop, around the clock and without sleep; pleading and begging for help, counseling and guidance. I feel like he's not in his right mind and I don't know how to get him back. He asks for me when I'm right there holding his hand. Begging for me to help him. I've never felt so helpless in my life!!! He is experiencing complete and utter mental anguish and being tortured!!! 1. What is this? 2. Where is he? 3. How do I snap him out of this?

Hello everyone.....again 樂 Sorry I've been SO needy!!! I've been on here every day since my dad moved in!! Since 6:30am, he's been saying; "Hello, hello!!! Help me, show me, hello, council me, guide me, hello, hello, Camille Lisa, where are you, hello, help me, show me the way, can someone please show me the way" It's going on 18 hours now and the repetition is driving me insane! Please!! For the love of God!! Someone tell me why he does this, what it means and how to make it stop. Hello, My father is 82 years old and currently in rehab with a broken hip and a broken shoulder from a fall. I've been helping take care of him for about a year, but when he's discharged next week, he'll be moving in with me and I'll be his primary caregiver. He sleeps most of the time and when he wakes up he chants over and over, for hours on end, thousand of times; Wow! Right now! Help me Council me! Guide me! Show me! He still knows his name, address and phone number; plus he still knows all of his family members. Am I safe in assuming he will not be getting any better? Does anyone else have loved ones with these symptoms?

I am a grieving mother and a reluctant traveler down the road of child loss. I lost my 21-year old daughter to suicide and I found her body. It was, is and will always be the nightmare of my life!!! Finding the inner strength to care for my father "while" grieving is definitely difficult to say the least!! But the most difficult part is coming downstairs every morning with the ambiguity of how I'll find him since I'm suffering with PTSD from finding my daughter. So, PLEASE tell me, so I can know what to expect and prepare myself..... What are the signs of the last weeks and days? In the hospital twice in two weeks with my wife. Slip and fall separated shoulder. She won't wear a sling so it separated again while she was sleeping. Feels like we're getting closer to a nursing home. Hurt my back picking her up. This is awful. Christmas parties are off the list. Little by little life is ending for us both. No Mothers day here. This disease destroys everything. I am looking for suggestions for meals. My wife (dementia 5 1/2 years) eats with her fingers now. Many foods have to be spoon fed and she hates to be fed that way Up early to have some time alone before my wife wakes up.

The Neurologist said that Dementia/Alzheimer's should be called "failure of the brain," because the other names are nebulous and do not show the severity of the disease to most people. As the patient's brain slowly dies, you know they've changed physically, and the caregivers are often in shock!! Patients will end up bedridden, unable to move, and unable to eat or drink. But it is the different phases beforehand that are just as painful. The day they suddenly forget how to dress themselves, and become confused or combative when you try to fix the shirt, or pants, they've put on backwards. When they repeatedly ask where their life- long mate is while looking straight at them. When they are confused, angry, or frightened, because they are still partially aware of who they were, yet are no longer... There will be people who will scroll by this message because Dementia/Alzheimer's has not touched them. They don't know what it is to fight or to have a loved one who leads a battle against Dementia/Alzheimer's. For all the men and women I know, I ask you a small favour. If you know someone who has led a battle against Dementia/Alzheimer's, is still struggling or who has passed, please add this to your status for one hour as a mark of respect and remembrance... Copy and paste it in support of the carers and families affected by Dementia and Alzheimer's. It truly is an ugly disease #alzeihmerssociety #alzeihmersawareness 樂樂樂 We need a network where caregivers can connect. It would be great if we all had some fellow caregivers who lived nearby who would share the burden then a network could be formed to compete with high priced institutional care. If each of us had some friends who are living with the same challenges as we are we could barter for care from people who understand what we are going through. We need a national movement to take back our ability to care for our loved ones without being robbed by the nursing home syndicate. We are being robbed . Always wondering when this misery will end. UTI time. I's been two months but it's back. A seizure just added insult to injury. Cat scans, EEGs, x rays all terrifying when she doesn't understand what's going on.

We have another U.T.I. Three in a row. The antibiotics don't seem to be working. Going to the E.R. I hate this desease! I can't cry. Six years since we started seeing signs of this disease.(fronto Temporal Dementia). It just keeps getting worse. Good morning. Up early for some alone time before the day begins Pfizer stopped research on Alzheimers an Dementia drugs. Not very promising. Why do Doctors continue to give false hope.?

Do any of you have any good ideas on how to get an LO mom to listen? She won't wear panties at night then she pees on the floor when she gets up either at night at 2 a.m. to make French toast or when she gets up in the morning. I've tried. I don't life with her. My daughter does. She doesn't help much. My mom won't listen. I've gotten her pads and bed pads. I've tried to talk to her. She will use the pads sometimes during the day but I don't know what to do. She makes one of us the bad guy and plays us against each other. My brothers only help once and awhile. Now, my daughter has started posting photos of the wet floor and her bed. My daughter has mental problems too. God help me. thought of those dehydration jello like things posted on here a long while ago. Would be cool to see the LOs get more water:

Ok, maybe you all know about this device but I just learned about it. I don't know how expensive it is, of coarse I don't even have a watch like this but I thought it is a really cool thing to have. I'm a fall risk. Falling down the stairs isn't so fun. My friend who had a stroke in June, only 50-right before her 50th b day, just fell out of her wheelchair and hit the wrong side of her head! I think she is ok, but in pain. She went from ICU to Rehab then now is in a nursing home, not a good one because they didn't keep a better eye on here, all since June. I think these would really help the elderly as my aunt has Alzheimer's and hated the "bracelet" from the fire dept because they told her what it was. I told them they should have just told her is was a bracelet. Well that didn't go over well so they put her in a home. I miss her, I'm across the country. Here's what I saw and wanted to share:

Thank you for adding me. I hope to get some ideas and answers to some questions. I've worked only as a receptionist at a nursing home for 2 years and 1 year at a senior apartment type living center. My father died in 2016. He had level 4 dementia and Parkinson's. My aunt just was admitted to a nursing home because of her Alzheimer's and 1 cousin just died and had dementia and Parkinson's. He was only 61. Lastly a close friend of my youth died last year from Alzheimer's. Thank you for having this group! I'm disabled and have no car so it's hard to get out to find a group. My 76 year old mom has not been diagnosed and my brothers won't talk to me about her. She takes Norco and Ambien for pain and sleep, been for years. She forgets things, which I can understand but when she's stressed, she will asked for my things or for me to buy her things, like another hearing aide because she keeps loosing each one she has. I'm afraid of her driving anymore but there's no one I can talk to. I've worked in nursing homes and senior living centers so I know a few things but how do I handle this alone? There's more to the family problems but how do I tell her I can't afford to keep buying her hearing aides, the cheap ones yes, but after 3? I'm feeling like a bad daughter. She gets a bit childish-is that common? and at other times, she thinks I owe her. I know I owe her and there isn't enough money in the world to pay her back. Does she keep forgetting what I've spent on her this year? I'm trying to get by as a disabled person now. It's really hard trying to handle her alone when she visits, still drives, but wow, can she forget right after saying something! help?

Prayers please~my aunt Loretta isn't doing well. My cousin posted: 9:34PM Hi Sheri update on mom she seems to be quickly deteriorating. She fell twice once at the nursing home once at the hospital. She isn’t eating much at all and seems to not be able to read anymore. When I went to see her in the hospital she didn’t know me. 樂樂I think she thought I was audrey. Not sure. I don’t think she knows who I am half the time anymore. But fakes it really well and I don’t push it it hurts too much. I really wish your mom could have seen her when she was here. I will be calling aunt evie tomorrow and letting her know how poorly mom is doing if she wants to see her

Well, I went and did it. I messaged my niece about my mom and her dementia getting worse. I also said my mom goes through her pain meds too quickly, which was my main concern. Why do I feel like a traitor? I don't know if they suspect her about her meds. She lives alone with her dog, 75 years old but doing ok in a lot of respects but she tried to do all the chores herself. Her eldest sister has Alzheimer's and a nephew just passed away at only 61. My mom is worried about a lot of things and there have been incidents would rather someone be hired or anyone closer to her to check on her. My cousin's wife is a leading teacher and nurse for Alzheimer's and she posted this. It will make you cry me because my dad never had a chance that I know of.

Mom's fighting physically smore with my daughter because she wanted her car keys back. I'll find out more but my mom bit and scratched my daughter who lives with her, she's a adult who works out of the house but was a caregiver for awhile. My mom's not done that before. I'm worried. Do I call social services? My daughter called the police to tell my mom that her eyes were dialated so they took her to her doctor's appointment. I have disabilities, so does my daughter. A few days later, my mom tells me that she got a black eye from her but I hadn't seen one when I saw her. I've seen my mom put her own arm down where the dog could scratch it when he was scratching the couch next to her to make it warm. She's doing that so he will scratch her arm and she'll get the attention! Have you all been through the same thing? Why?! Yes, she was living alone and is along when my daughter's at work. My mom is the kind to look for attention by complaining. Yikes, is that common? Hey I have something good to share and that's always good. I've been waiting to know if my aunt received the beaded necklaces I made her. She had been going downhill and hate that I'm so far away. I know I will see her in Heaven one day, though. Praise God! She has received the necklaces and her daugther sent me a pic this morning. My day shines! I moved my mother into senior living late last year because I didn't think she was doing a sufficient job of caring for herself and she, being fiercely independent, didn't want to live with me. I'll go into the saga of the move another time. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. But, anyway...I've been emptying out her former home over the past month so it can be put up for sale. The memories. The "things" that I know were special to Mom that I had to pick and choose over. Some kept and others that have been thrown in the trash. Those items that may be valuable to someone else and were set aside to donate. Each and every time I entered Mom's old home I had emotions to deal with. So many emotions. I've found strength I didn't know I had. Has anyone else been dealing with this lately? How do you know when it's time for assisted living? Please share your experiences! Admiration, blessings and much respect going out to those of you who care for your loved ones in your home. My mother wanted nothing to do with living in our home and my husband and I travel quite a bit so Mom is in a senior community near us. All that doesn't stop me from feeling guilty about her not living with us. I feel like I'm failing her. What made you decide it was time for memory care for your loved one? Mom is so forgetful these days. She's still in independent living and the staff and residents know her situation. The environment is safe and I don't believe she is doing anything to endanger herself.

I volunteered to be one of the admins who "approve" people who want to join this site. I know that we're all in different time zones, but it amazes me how many "middle of the night" requests there are to join. Sleep deprivation is linked to dementia and we all know we don't want to go there. Does anyone have any non-drug related ideas that have been helpful for getting a better night's sleep?

Happy Mother's Day to those of you who are mothers and to those of you caring for mothers! I moved my mother from her home into a continuing care community 6 months ago. I moved her and then began going through all of her things. I came across a slide projector that hadn't been used in I-don't-know-how-many- years. It still works! This afternoon we'll have a slide show. There are many slides but the ones that were already loaded in the cartridge were from her late teens/early 20's. I can't wait for her to see them! I had genetic testing done to see, among other things, if I have APOE e4 which is found in most Alzheimer's patients. I've been asked if I was worried about getting the test results. No, because I know lifestyle is a defining factor and I am living my life in a way to avoid dementia. If I was APOE e4 positive I would be more dedicated to the way I've been eating and exercising but, other than that, I wouldn't change a thing. Has anyone else been tested for this gene?

I've taken my mom to a neurologist who, from a cursory memory test, confirmed memory issues and scheduled a CAT scan (results showed nothing unusual) and additional memory testing (long story but Mom walked out so no results). What now? My mother definitely has dementia. Repetition of stories, forgets minute to minute, paranoia. What do I do now to get her diagnosed? She accuses me of all sorts of things when I schedule an appointment for her...even the dentist for a cleaning. The medical community has seemed so unsupportive. I don't know what to do next. I'm really reluctant to do the hours long memory testing again. Surely there must be other avenues for diagnosis. Advice, please! I'm so glad to have found this group! My mother is 80 and hasn't been officially diagnosed with a particular form of dementia because she won't cooperate with any kind of doctor. I understand she has anosognosia (an inability or refusal to recognize a defect or disorder that is clinically evident) and that has made this a long and lonely road. Tonight has been a struggle. Mom has called me time and time again. Where is the money from the sale of her home of 50 years (sold 3 years ago) and where is her car (she is in a Sr. care community and I cannot give her her car back because of her confusion and poor memory). I've tried to be patient and comforting. I don't know what sparked her stress or if I put any of it at ease. I guess tomorrow is a new day and I'll see where she is in the morning. (sigh) I'm so grateful that I have this community to share with. I know there must be someone out there who is in my shoes....

I have studied up on dementia. So, I get it. Why does the forgetfulness still take me by surprise each and every time? My gut response (which I do squelch) wants me to remind my mother of...whatever. I guess it's just because it breaks my heart. I know there's no answer for that.

I apologize for any tears this video may bring, but it gave me an important reminder today to remember who my mother used to be before dementia and find something that brings that person out whenever I can.

I had to move mom from her outside cottage at an independent living facility to an inside apt at the same place and also considered independent living but closer for her to walk to things. She climbed into the window of her old apt and spent the night there. Next day she refused to leave and even though we locked the front door back up she sat on the porch in 95 degree weather. I went to the office to see if I could find someone to persuade her to come inside. I was only gone 15 minutes but by the time I got back she had let the air out of two of my tires! Okay I had to kind of find the humor in that but it was still inconvenient. What I don't know is if she keeps causing trouble will they kick her out of the place? Y'all that window climbing, vandilizer of tires person is my 90 year old mom樂. I have POA and would like to hear if you've had similar experiences. Not sure what to expect or what my rights are here.

Everyone on this page has been so helpful and kind. I just don't know how those of you who keep their LO at home do it. I go to see my mom once a day sometimes twice and visiting with her and hearing her accusations and demands are affecting my health. I take care of my grandkids after school we are moving about 45 minutes away and I somedays just come home and cry. She needs be in assisted living or memory care and if I decide that's best for her it will be one of the hardest things I ever do.

I need to make a big decision and would appreciate any advice. My mom is in independent living but will need to go to memory care soon. Her memory is really bad and she doesn’t bathe. I am thinking about having her live with me. Problem is our bedrooms are upstairs so we are looking into putting a nice modular home right next to ours. We live on several acres in the country and she enjoys it there. I hesitate because I am bipolar and even though it is controlled by medicine I still have my bad times. I am so afraid we are going to spend money on this housing and I won’t be able to take care of her. If I do this there is no going back because she will not have funds for memory care. I plan on having home care for her two or three times a week. I am shaking as I write this just with the magnitude of this decision.

I'm afraid I may have got bad advice and made a mistake. I recently moved my mom from one apartment to another at the facility where she was living that offered her a safer environment. She was not happy and kept going back to the old apartment and getting in (crawling through windows) and saying she was moving back. Some of her furniture was still in its garage while I was looking for a storage unit. She let the air out of my tires because she was mad and was at the front desk night and day arguing with them. Her doctor suggested I put her in a hospital/behavioral center so they could put her on medicines for all her new behaviors. She is mad at me and I am not really sure I did the right thing. Any words of wisdom for me. I am trying to decide if my mom needs to go to memory care or can stay in her independent living facility. She is getting argumentative and unhappy but is still aware of her surroundings. She would know that she was in a place where people are worse off than her. I am stressed and sick and worried about her. How do I make this decision?

I am very fortunate that my mom, with twice a day visits from me is still able to live in an independent living facility. I honestly don't know how those that have 24/7 responsibilities for their loved ones do it. I admire the fact that they are able to take on this task. I would like to know how others feel or try to prepare yourselves for the possibility that you may also share the fate of those with Alzheimer's and dementia. I was up all night thinking about it and when I was able to doze a bit I had nightmares about it. I woke up with a lost scared feeling and the worst was I couldn't remember my kids and gkids in the dreams. I am trying to live a healthier lifestyle but other than that how can you ever possibly be prepared for something this awful. The director at the independent living facility my mom lives in now is telling me mom needs to go into memory care. I don't think she is ready yet. I hear everyone talking about stages and wonder if there is a certain stage when they need more attention. My mom also for the last year has been having delusions or hallucinations. Is this associated with a certain stage? How will I know when it is time to move my mom to memory care. She forgets what she has said 1 minute after she says it. She doesn’t clean herself or her clothes very often.

When your lo has to go to memory care do we have to hand over her finances to them. She lives in Texas

Is Alzheimer's or vascular dementia hereditary? Has anyone tried writing down answers for those with dementia? My mom calls me and demands to know where her car is or asks when she’s moving back,etc. everyday she asks this and then hangs up when she doesn’t like the answer. It’s like I have to break her heart several times a day. When she asks a question I can tell her to look at the papers I left her.

How do you know or how does your loved one act when they have a urinary tract infection?

How long does a person have AD before anyone notices or they get diagnosed. My mom has been repeating herself for the last three years and could have been doing so longer and I just didn't notice.❤樂 find all the comments and complaints on this page very helpful. My mom is clearly in stage 5 of dementia but I have never had her tested. Is this really necessary? Does she need it to qualify for any Medicare extras? TIA and bless every one of you❤樂

How can one person know they have dementia and another in a similar stage not know? My mom has been forgetting she asked a question about every two minutes now she is forgetting almost immediately. What can I expect next?

I have been part of this group for about 6 months and it has helped me as a caregiver learn what to expect and how to cope. This is my new hurdle. I am moving mom into an independent living complex and know she will be resistant to the idea. She is probably in late stage four but thinks nothing is wrong. I am going to tell her tomorrow and I know what to expect as we had to relieve her of her car several months ago. I am not questioning the decision but would like to hear how others have been able to take this significant step with their loved one❤樂 I'm a positive person so I tend to find the good in everything but sometimes it's hard. The other day my mom said I hope I live long enough to see your kids take everything from you. She's 90! My daughters said that's okay memaw we're already doing that樂 and we all burst into laughter. ❤樂 I'd love to hear your stories of finding humor with this devastating disease. The Eating Saga continues:

MIL: can I save this for tomorrow? Me: yes you can MIL: do I need to finish this? Me: Do you want to finish it? MIL: uh huh, yes Me: good MIL: takes another bite MIL: can I save the rest for tomorrow? Me: Do you want to save it for tomorrow or eat it now? MIL: save it for tomorrow. Me: ok, set it to the side and I’ll clean up when I finish eating. MIL: can I try another bite? Me: yes ma’am! MIL: takes another bite. Where can I save it? Where can I rest? Where can I put this until the morning? Takes another bite. This is good! I’m going to try to finish this! Me: ok MIL: I’m going to give it another try! Me: ok! MIL: Can I save this for tomorrow? Me: ... sure 樂

Anyone else relate? 樂樂樂 After a couple of months of researching, filling out forms, working up the nerve, I have finally made the decision to make use of SarahCare Adult Daycare. Today is the first day for both of my in-laws, and I am so apprehensive. I have the same feeling today as I did 24 years ago dropping my babies off at daycare... lol! Praying they both have a good day! We just got back home from a long weekend trip to Dallas area. We took my in-laws to his 60 year High School reunion and to visit family in the area. He was so surprised and happy to see so many familiar faces. Thankful that it was a great trip for everyone! Class of 1959 ❤樂 Hello! I would like to get some feedback and/or tips on traveling with your LO’s suffering from dementia and Alzheimer’s. We will be flying to Los Angeles from Texas. We did this last year and it was good. But, now that they are more confused and anxiety is worse, I’m concerned this trip will be more stressful. Do you have any tips that you would like to share? CBD oil is a staple in our house, and I don’t want to increase meds just for the trip if it can be avoided.

Also, is there anyone with ideas on day activities that can be done in or around Anaheim that would be more geared for them? They are both fairly active so getting around would not be an issue. I just don’t want to over do it. Thanks in advance!

Warning... rant coming!

Sent my in-laws home with their daughter this past week. I had to be with my daughter who recently had a miscarriage and had to have a D&C procedure. I knew it was going to be bad once they came back home because of previous visits to her home. However, I did not expect more bruising and no bowel movements for 6 days!!! No one can explain anything and just shrugs it off while I get stuck with the aftermath once again. Trying real hard not to hate people, but she’s really pushing all the buttons. Amazon delivered today! I’m really hoping we can make a connection or find a spark of interest with these new items. 樂樂 While I’m busy working on a new caregiving plan, Jean (my mother-in-law) asks if she can work with me. This was her choice of “work” 樂樂樂樂 She loves to paint flowers!

She is diagnosed with late-stage Alzheimer’s and Dementia (+video)

I was finally able to clean out the guest room enough to make space for a home gym. My father in law has gone to the gym faithfully, 3 days a week, for about 30 years. I am not motivated enough to get everyone ready and out the door by 5:30am to take him, so this was the next best thing. He has been in and out of that room all day today making use of it all! Mother in law has never liked to exercise, so she wasn’t as happy about all the equipment... lol! She did use the recumbent bike for 10 mins so that’s a good start! And yes, we work out in our pjs, don’t judge 樂樂樂

I took both of the in-laws to their Neurologist today for their 6 month checkup. My father in law (early on- set Alzheimer’s) scored a 10 on the MoCA test. This was an 8 point decrease in score since February 2019. The dr was concerned about the rapid decline and says it could be due to lack of sleep. He is starting Seroquel 25mg tonight for impulsive behavior and hopefully to help with sleep. I know it will take several days, but fingers crossed this will work. The dr explained to me that there are two types of Alzheimer’s. One is with depression (mother in law), and the other is with impulse behavior (father in law). Has anyone else been told this? I honestly did not know that there were “types” of Alzheimer’s. 樂樂 ♀樂 Today has behaved just as a Monday should! Waking up knowing the plan for the day, but having to change it entirely! “They” say routine is crucial for dementia/Alzheimer’s patients, but I’m finding it is crucial for me as well... lol! So why was I so mad? I had to make myself stop and breath, then reschedule my own appointments for today so that I could accommodate their last minute appointments. All in all, I’m just ready for the day to be over!

It wasn’t all bad! We did go grab a nice lunch, with no complaining, while waiting on my flat to be fixed on my car. 樂樂樂樂樂樂 My FIL is falling around once a week. He refuses a walker or cane. There’s nothing we can do to convince him, just walk with him.

My FIL is starting to fall once a week. He hasn’t gotten hurt yet, you know, title cuts and bruises. But yesterday he fell on the escalator and today trying to ride his bike. He REFUSES to use a cane or stop riding his bike. He is in Florida for the winter with just his wife. She doesn’t listen to our advice. ANYTHING?? Does anyone notice that their LO’s sight is beginning to decline.

All of a sudden my FIL hates eggs. Loved them all his life, not anymore. Anyone else’s LO experience this. So it begins, my FIL is starting to blame his wife, saying she doesn’t let him do anything, just want him out of the way. Blaming her for things she didn’t do. She is holding up very nicely. Just not sure how much longer. She is 82. We are here for her whenever she needs us. My FIL was diagnosed last July, but if you think about it he’s had Alzheimer’s for about 4 years. Anyway, dr put the patch on him, and it’s really working. I don’t know for how long, but it’s helping for the time being. He asked the server to give him the check, he told us he was paying because of all the work we’ve been doing. However he still asks the same question 100 times, and can’t really carry on a conversation. But will take it My FIL hovers. He wants to be of help. It’s good and bad. After being diagnosed, do you still take your LO to the memory care dr, or do you just take them to their primary. What more can the memory care dr do I cannot believe that there isn’t a GPS watch that doesn’t cost hundreds of $$, paired with a phone and not a monthly fee for our loved ones. I’ve spent 3 days looking, speaking with the Alzheimer’s Assoc. as well. Any ideas. I’m looking for a gps watch for my FIL. A simple plain watch! Ideas? Best tracking device for my FIL. It’s time to buy a device. Thinking a watch. He wears his everyday, not sure if he will wear a new one, unless we present it as a Father’s Day gift. Thoughts on what others have purchased. Has anyone bought a fake puppy or kitten for their LO. I’ve seen some that move, has hair that feels real, barks, etc. but no mess.

My FIL just recently started closing one eye, looks around, he says it doesn’t bother him. Any suggestions!!!

This is so so very very sad. In the town I live in, an 81 year old man, called police at 2 am, stating that he had a shot gun and was going to kill his wife. The police show up, he is outside, pointed his gun st the officer, the officer shot and killed him. The mans wife was upstairs in bed and knew nothing of what was going on. The man had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. So it’s believed he committed suicide by police. So my FIL is beginning to become combative with MIL. So glad they will be home from Florida in 3 weeks. She’s going to need our help. Someone posted about their LO always being cold, cranking the heat to 75. I didn’t get a chance to read the responses. My FIL turns it to 75 too, and it wakes my MIL UP AT NIGHT.

My FIL doesn’t remember what you tell him 2 minutes later. However, he knows that he has to shower, shave, etc. he knows the leaves need blowing, , etc. he has slowed down a lot, he would walk 4 miles a day, now maybe a 1/2 mile. It’s so sad watching such slow deteriation. very complex disease. VERY

My MIL won’t put her foot down when it comes to my FIL. He isn’t suppose to climb ladders anymore, but did it anyways. She is afraid of him getting angry and possibly striking her. Last year my husband put a lock around the ladders, but she unlocks them and let him climb. End of rant. My FIL hovers, has been doing it for a couple of years. Anyone else's LO do this. It makes me nervous, but I know he isn't doing it on purpose. Wish us luck. My in laws are moving from their home that they lived in for 50 years. They are moving into a HOA track, which will be perfect. My FIL, has Alzheimer’s, and I’m worried about the transition. Praying it will be a smooth one, but prepared for anything. My FIL was told by 2 drs today that he doesn’t need to check his numbers for his diabetes anymore. He’s 84, doesn’t remember how to do and when the does he doesn’t know what he is suppose to do. I say amen. Let him eat what he wants. Does anyone’s LO wear the patch? It’s suppose to help slow down th Alzheimer’s. Pros/cons?

I'm not sure what stage my FIL, is in, but he gets up at 3 am and takes a bath. Then goes back to bed. He also paces a lot. Anyone else's loved one does this. The problem is he wakes my MIL, then she has trouble falling back to sleep. She really needs her rest, as she is currently his total caregiver. It’s such a frustrating disease, for the caregiver. This group gives me hope in humanity. There are so many people that want nothing to do with family. Everyone on this site, loves their parents/grandparents, etc. As my husband has moved into the late stages of this hideous disease, I have discovered products that make caregiving easier. I want to share two of them. I don't sell them, just discovered them online. 1. Touch of Care - anti-strip jumpsuits. Every day at 6 pm my husband undressed. He also urinated wherever he was when he felt the urge. These twill jumpsuits eliminated both problems. They zip up the back with a snap tab covering the zipper pull. They wash and dry beautifully. 2. Gillette TREO - a new razor DESIGNED to be used by caregivers. It's new and apparently popular because it was delayed in shipping but was worth the wait. I left patches with an electric razor and had to go over and over some places. The TREO comes with shave gel in the handle and a guard on the blade. Blan went to church with a perfect shave yesterday. Blan didn't sit still and sustained no injury 樂. I was so happy. I hope this is not against the rules. I think knowing about successes of others are wonderful to hear about. Still looking for perfect incontinence supplies. Love and blessings to you my fellow-travelers.

Two of Blan's work friends are coming to pick him up tomorrow and take him to Ft. Morgan and to lunch. He's been retired 7 years due to Alzheimer's. Please pray with me that they have a great time. He was Historic Site Manager at Ft. Morgan for 24 years. The 3 authored a book about the fort together. They are planning to sign the books now for sale in the museum. I'm not sure Blan can do that. I'll try to get pictures. Blan just left on his adventure. Felt like sending him off to first grade. Blan and Mike Bailey both assured me that Mike will take care of him. So funny.

"If you can't read the menu ask Bob and Mike for help." "Or if you need help to pay"... Blan, " I'm sure they will take care of me."

So precious to me that he knows he might need help and that he trusts his friends. Oh, the stories they will share. Friends of 25 years who haven't all three been together in 7 yes. All retired historians. And shenanigans to remember!

Thank you for accepting my request to join the group. My husband and I have been married 46 years. He is 68 and I am 64. He was diagnosed 9+ years ago with Alzheimer's. It was not a total surprise when symptoms occurred because his mom, grandmother and great grandmother had the illness He had to retire 7 years ago. Today he still cares for his own hygiene, walks the dog alone, and engages in limited conversation. We are truly blessed. He takes Aricept, Namenda Lexapro and Kepra. We have 3 grown son's and 6 grandchildren. I look forward to getting to know you and enjoying the support of fellow travelers. I found another stress reducing product for caring for my beloved! Amazon

I have some good news. Our 43 year old son is moving home to help me take care of his Daddy and the house. I am overwhelmed by the love this decision represents. He is giving up his life in a place he loves. He has worked at the same place 20 years and will be starting over in some new place. He came in November for a week. Decided on the way home that we needed him. Text 2 days later to ask if we have a spare room he can have. My husband was diagnosed 10 years ago. He has declined very slowly until recently. I know we're just approaching the hard part. So thankful for our son's selfless love. I know this is not possible for all, I couldn't be close by when my parent's health was failing.

My goal is to live one day at a time accepting my husband as he is today and enjoying his company at whatever level he can muster. He is 4th generation Alzheimer's in his family, so we benefitted from learning how we didn't want to live. If I could get him to stop hoarding trash, I'd be a happy camper.樂 A local church has a respite care program that is incredible. Monday and Wednesday 10-2. They have live music, sitting exercise, painting, bingo, etc. It is operated by volunteers 8-12 each session and 8 participants. They suggested that I call it a social club but my man won't go to a social club. So, he calls it his Thursday meeting Downtown. It's not on Thursday or Downtown but he loves it. They listen to his stories over and over and he knows all the words to the 50s& 60s music. Lunch Is catered by a local restaurant. It's only $40/wk. I felt so guilty the first day I left him, but, he loves it. Some of the helpers are retired nurses and other health care folks. They also screen very carefully to have participants who are at similar levels. Blan is the youngest by far at 68. He is a true southern gentleman still and everybody loves him. He doesn't know one day from another but Monday and Wednesday he's up and dressed and ready to go about an hour early. I don't know where he got the idea it was on Thursday. My beloved husband of 47 years is now on hospice. He is not yet bed bound . He was diagnosed ten+ yrs ago. Did great until April then began a rapid decline. Medicare pays for all meds, diapers, ensure. A fantastic aid comes 3x/wk to bathe him. Nurse 2x/wk. Social Worker 2x/month. Chaplain as needed. The relief of not paying for the diapers is huge. I'm still getting used to the people coming so often. I don't think he has less than 6 months to live, but denial is a powerful defense mechanism. Pray for us. God has blessed us

We have reached the hard part of Alzheimer's. Blan (husband) has episodes of disorientation. He doesn't recognize me. He's looking for "Debbie" and he says he's scared to death. I tell him I'm Debbie. He says that scares him for me to say that. He says I'm not the one he married. He shakes and cries. I hold him and sing as much of Happy Together as I can remember. When the episode breaks, he apologizes, asks if he hurt me, asks if I'm going to send him to an asylum. I assure him we're fine; he's not going anywhere, that I will always love him and be with him. God is not surprised by this new phase. He put it Bobby's (son) heart to move in to help us. God provided a job for him at our church - 2 blocks away! He is great with his daddy. I would not like to be handling this by myself. God is so good. We see his hand in our lives every day. I can't imagine walking this walk without God's love and provision. Thank you for your consistent prayer. Please continue to pray. Blan still prays and worships. I thank God for Blan and for our life together - all of it. We thought he missed his chair. Turned out he just wanted to sit with me.

I love it when he's so happy that the Alzheimer's doesn't show in his eyes!♥樂 Because Blan is the 4th generation of his family with Alzheimer's, we noticed the symptoms early. Our family Dr agreed with us and started him on Namenda and Aricept before the Neurologist was ready to call it. The earlier the better for those meds to work well. I think that is part of the reason Blan has progressed so slowly. Very thankful. Does this happen to some of you ,I take MIL shower or towel bath. When I do shower she poops in the shower and the really mentally gets to me. I bathe her like twice a week. She doesn't really like getting showered. Does this happen to any body? My mother in law today fall thank God it was nothing the weird think is she seem not to remember how to use her legs at that moment but as soon as we got her up she was able to move. Has this happen to any of you?

How does Respite work any feedback please Just something to share that I see in my MIL ,she has forgot almost everyone her children her grandkids to bath to use restroom but the most amazing thing is she thanks God every time she is about to eat, and she will talk about God and his amazing power. That's tells me that he is somewhere in her and will never leave her sight. Just wanted to share this its just feeling of the power of faith and God in our heart .Sorry if I offend people with other believes. God bless you all! Do you have same thing happing with your love ones ?

My mother in law has been prescrib this medication memantine 10mg has any one had a bad experience Mil is very weak doesn't walk but just a few steps and her speech is getting less understanding ,drinking only like 8 to 16 oz water a day eating very little hardly remembers anyone. And last month she said I don't want to die this month. Yesterday she said I feel so scared ,I asked why Josie she stated cause I'm so scared of dying I wonder if she feels something., Good morning may you all have a great weekend. Well I'm trying to start a support group so together we can share our our experiences and by them learn. I'm an Hispanic women and I take care of my mother in law our Hispanic community does really talk about this disease , many people are ashamed or just lost and don't know what to do. Please if you or relative friends are going through this join this group were we can help and learn together. Thank you... Have a question the doctor has been wanting to have a UTI for my MIL they have to use a catheter due to her being in bed being incontinent. We don't what her to have one cause I have read its usually very upsetting to a person with Dementia. But now they wont refill one of her medication. She is very stable why do they do this. MIL has doctor appt . going a public transportation due to it being easier. Waiting I rather go on own car but not able to.

Oh my its been so hard this past weeks mil wants leave , she's wetting on her bed . Had a doctors appt everything came out good. Just feeling overwhelmed with this situation. Just venting Good evening everyone just hoping you could guide me my mother in law had her first visit to a neurology Doctor. The doctor did a test called MMSE her score was 5 does anyone know what this means? Thank you hope someone can help

Good morning everyone prayers this new year goes good for everyone. As a caregiver I know we go through so many changes so I pray we can stay positive and in peace so we can keep caring for our love one. I care for my MIL she had gotten so bad in the last 2 months from going to the restroom on her own to now not being able to go. So now she is on diapers and can even walk her speech is getting worse hardly drinks water or eats. We had a very stressful December , she even said I don't want to die this month not this month. I wonder if this is the last stages of this horrible disease.

Bad day yesterday MIL was good all day until the evening she started say I need to go home ,we tell her and re assure her you are home. Starts crying and stating I can't believe what horrible people you are. She didn't even remember my husband her son, and keep saying you are both horrible. She hasn't been drinking water I wonder if she is dehydrated and if that's the reason of this, Don't know but my hubby was so upset. Well just venting and praying for a better day. GBY Well this is MIL I take care of her basically 24/7 at times it get overwhelming then I realize its not her fault , and I pray for God to give me the grace,compassion my MIL so much needs. Thank God for my faith its so very tough! As the bible say I can do all things through Christ that strengthen me. Thank you for approving me into this group. I'm caring for my mother in law its been hard 1 year and months. I believe she is in the late stages but not sure. I hope I learn to deal more with this disease so I can help her and help my hasband to deal with this season of our life. Everyone have a blessed day!!

I've had a very bad few days MIL is worse then ever what's to leave house and is getting aggressive toward my son and I. She was doing good in occasion she would have bad days. But this so sad cause its my hasband mother. God help us through this. Word if advice, if your loved one is newly diagnosed, have them recall their past and remember their own history. Write it down, because once it's gone, there is no getting it back. No amount of 'do you remember when' will ever bring back their memories. Does anyone else's LO think the shows on TV are real and the people who are in them are part of your family? How do you convince your LO that they now live with you. My mom moved in with me in 2010 before she started showing symptoms of the disease. In the past 2 years she keeps asking if someone is going to take her home. Sometimes she asks 5 if 6 times in a 15 minute period. 樂 Alright I need suggestions. My mom is constantly asking to go home. I understand this and usually redirect her. But that isn't lasting long. Today my sister was telling me that mom was talking about walking to her old home town. We live 2 hours away from there. Now I need to get some type of alarm system so we'll know if she opens the door. Any suggestions? Thanks for all the birthday wishes. I told mom that it was my birthday and she said happy birthday then promptly forgot. Today's my birthday, sure wish my mom remembered. The 樂

Ok, question. I'm kinda new here and from what I've read so far things change rapidly. Anyway, did anyone's LO take Tramadol for pain before showing signs of dementia? My mom was 100% fine, then took a fall and the dr prescribed tramadol. Shortly after she started being confused and it hasn't stopped. I feel certain had she not taken that drug she might not be so bad now. I keep seeing 'break through' treatment for this disease but how come it's just trials and no actual application yet? Does anyone have experience with loved one taking Seriqual? Had it helped or no difference? Does anyone have a LO who constantly folds things? My mom has a throw blanket on the sofa that she is always folding. Even when she is cold and needs it on her she folds it up. Ok, does anyone else's lo have times that they totally forgot to do simple things. We've noticed that when mom gets tired she gets like a little kid not knowing what to do even though you're telling her. I'm wondering if this is an indication of how much time we have left. Sometimes I think my mom is going to drive me to drink, than I remember, I don't drink. God give me strength! Ok, my mom is extremely upset that I won't take her home. However the home she is thinking of has been gone for years. She wants her mom and dad who have been gone for 30+ years. I had my niece call and pretend to be her mom telling her that she had permission to stay with me. Mom started crying and so I put her to bed for a little while. But she is really upset that her mom is gone. This breaks my heart because I know that nothing I do will make a difference. Hi..been awhile..my husband has forgotten me for at leadt 48hrs ..off n on before .now. I show him.our wedding pic he doesnt believe me ..thinks im a friend. My daughter told him im working..wr still share a bed..but he grabbed my arm last nigjt demandinbbi give his money back..hrs 69 n im 65 married 45yrs. Do i just go slong with pretending im a friend.. Thanks for listening

Ok, I'm going to have to get some advice. My mom moved in with me 8 years ago. In the last 5 or so she has gone downhill considerably. She fell last August and broke her leg and while the leg healed just fine she developed a sore on her ankle. It has taken some time to heal and I can't afford to pay for someone to stay with her while I work so I asked my oldest sister to stay and help. I am now thinking that my mom will never be able to stay by herself again. What am I going to do.

My mum has the memory nurse coming in a couple of weeks, my sister says he needs watching she had problems with him with her in-laws, he sent her MIL home from the psychiatric hospital when he really shouldn't have as her MIL was violent and distressed, in fact before he assessed she could go home he said she was the worst case he'd ever seen!!

Is there anything I need to think about, I thought he was just come and test her and talk to her about it. She's just at the start and managing fine on her own, I didn't think I would need to say much it's her appointment for now she's still in control 樂 My sister will be in Spain, she does drama I don't. 樂

Is anyone able to give me advice on introducing carers/befrienders into mum's routine. Her memory is increasingly worse by the week and I am unable to visit daily or become a carer so it's time to slowly introduce someone to check on her. She will probably qualify for someone to go in daily and check meds soon but they are trying blister packs first so that could be weeks away.

Tablet taking ....mum's fine if you take it before bed but out with that she forgets. She's getting new tabs and they are out with bedtime and she is forgetting them. I suggested an alarmed box and she said no it was complicated ...she would make an extra special.effort to remember. She has taken 6 water tabs instead of 21 ...she said I was agitating her by complicating things...she's not remembering that she forgets ....樂 Scan results today, a fair bit of shrinkage inconsistent with age along with a score of 88 in the memory test, which isn't bad but not great translated to my sister as " it's nothing to worry about, just old age everyone gets it".

So glad she took it well, he didn't say dementia or Alzheimer's just she'll see the memory nurse every few months.

She's happy with a hint of edge here and there I'm going to enjoy my time with her a day at a time and take it from there 樂 I don't often post as things are just mozeying along but things are gaining momentum, the memory nurse says the next thing to look for is mum not changing or washing but I am wondering if I should be making a connection between my mum asking if our local shop sells tenna lady bladder leaking pads today and the fact she's been telling me for the last couple of weeks that she can't keep up with her washing, she just doesn't know where it all comes from.

She said today she just hadn't headed to the toilet in time and had an accident. Also for a few weeks there Weanytime had ourmy psychiatristsister or I called appointment she was in. Some the toilet tips .from Your the thoughts pysychiatrist and guidance in no particular is very much order appreciated. 樂 1. Take More EPA fish oil and eat oily fish 2. Exercise the body 3.Exercise the brain, draft game, chess game, word search. Write down things from olden days, like a wee story etc 4. Fruit smoothie twice a week 5. Socialise with friends, go out for meals etc 6. Eat more fruit and veg 7. Listen to classical music esp Vivaldi Four Season and other good ones Motzart & Bach

Then I had to ask him ...SUGAR .. P:'do you eat alot of sugar' M: ...huge grin 'Oh yes, I have a very sweet tooth' P:'what would you eat in a day?' M:'I like snickers, I would have snickers, oh and I like ice cream so I have an ice cream, oh and I love carmel shortcake I have 1 or 2 of them ME 'What about a biscuit with your tea mum M;' No I would just have tea' ....she lies P:'Do you take sugar in your tea?' M: ' yes, sweetners' ...I hold up 5 fingers when she's not looking. Psychiatrist looks like ...please don't tell me anymore 樂

So he says if you do nothing else do the EPA oil ...(it arrived yesterday she had no idea we had ordered it but is keen to take it.) and move the body ( so I thought we could do 10 mins of yoga ...she is sore with arthritis so is reluctant but I think she'll be surprised if we do gentle movement together.)

Lots to work on, the sugar reduction just won't happen she lives alone and I KNOW it would make a huge difference I am a healthy eating freak so it kills me to see her destroy herself with sugar but it will never

Mum was at my sister's for a family dinner and the taxi arrived to take her home, it was a mini bus and she could not get in it. My sister says it took 20 mins she just could not co-ordinate her legs atall. This is new, she's declining very fast now and she is changing from extremely happy to a tone of worry and adgitation in her voice not all the time but it's getting more noticeable and regular 樂. Mum fell when we came out of the Doctors on Monday. She struggles to lift her feet and they seem to move too fast for her with her upper body always tilted in front of them. Any advise on how to slow her down and stop her falling or even how to get her back up would be so appreciated. She is getting bigger as she eats alot of ice cream and sweet things and I can't hold her up if she's going down. I grabbed her arm thinking I could and she swung round and went down backwards and cracked her head if she had gone forward she would have done some damage to her face. She hardly felt any pain. It's a first but I fear not a last. 樂 Mum's memory hasn't been the best, so she had the flu vaccine 4 weeks ago and her memory has nose dived, it is very bad, no short term memory, She's had bloods all fine. Anyone else had this rapid a decline flu vaccine or not? Mum is going through the confusion where now she can't find things or remember things. She has a note book and pad but can't remember to write in it and if we make sure she does she doesn't remember to look at it ....I would appreciate some ideas...she says if she can see it she remembers ...I was thinking a board on her kitchen wall. She lives alone. 樂樂 My mama and her new baby My mom having some fun with her favorite song and family樂

Moms really confused today and not putting her words together very well. Her sentences are all over the place. I was showing her pictures she looks at daily with me and she didn’t recognize some of her family today樂 She didn’t want to eat breakfast this morning and that was a shock for her. But I made her one Piece of toast and had her eat it and she did. I wish they had a cure for this ugly sad disease 樂樂 My mom drew a clock for me today Trying to help my mom keep her Independence Mama enjoying herself again today樂樂 yes my mom owns like 10 purple 樂 shel loves purple... nails are purple, room is purple and her nails are done every two weeks purple樂 For some reason my mum isn’t happy today. In a very somber mood Trying to keep my moms spelling skills up樂 Dementia Sucks!!!! Mama went for a walk today and loved it... I love CBD gummies for my mama Yes mom I’ll play this song over 7 times in a row if that’s what makes you smile and laugh and be happy樂 road trips with my mama 樂 my mom unloaded the dishwasher and loaded it this morning... she did a great job. She’s been on CBD oil now for 3 weeks… My mom did good today making her favorite sandwich 樂樂樂樂 My mama and her new doll she got today樂 she loves her... Doll Therapy For Dementia senior-doll-therapyAlzheimer's doll therapy is a known resource in working with dementia patients. Using a Teddy Bear or a Baby Doll can be a very effective way for a person with Alzheimer's or any kind of dementia to decrease stress and agitation. A caregiver can use doll therapy for dementia patients as a way to put responsibility, caring and structure back into the lives of those afflicted with Alzheimer's. Working with a realistic doll has to be introduced to those with Alzheimer's very carefully. A doll or teddy bear can be seen as a welcoming grandchild or the little sibling of their youth or the Alzheimer's patient can fear the therapy doll as an unwanted responsibility. dementia-patients-doll-therapyFrom experience, introducing doll therapy in a controlled atmosphere by allowing the dementia patient to take responsibility rather than giving them the doll to play with, can bring structure to their lives. The Alzheimer's doll can help a person who is not verbalizing to initiate speech again. It is part of the basic thought process to speak, hum or sing to a baby in your arms. The therapy doll can have its clothes washed, folded and put away and then dressed the next day. Even the teddy bear brings soothing comfort as it can be heated to bring warmth to the patient and can be a cause of an activity. Whether it is realistic baby doll , a heated bear or a furry fish shaped doll, doll therapy for dementia and Alzheimer's patients can really work!...click here to read our article, "Learning About Doll Therapy" dementia-doll-therapy“A baby doll can… Calm someone who is upset; Provide endless hours of hugs and smiles; Lull a person to sleep; Create a distraction from a dangerous, harmful or upsetting event; Serve as an attention-getter; I hate having to get stern with my mother樂

My mom is having a great day today! She’s been happy all day樂樂樂 she loves her companion 樂 Dyna Reactions Comments Stage of AD Type of text Basic ADLs Instrum. ADLsOther IADLs

101 11 6 2 7

31 6 6 2 1

219 17 6 2 3

2 0 6 4 4

45 2 6 2 5

5 0 6 2 5

59 7 6 2 5

3 0 6 4 6

277 49 6 2 66 16 6 2 6

7 0 6 2 6 0 0 6 2 6

40 5 6 2 6

28 3 6 2 6 1 0 6 2 6

74 20 6 2 6

9 1 6 2 6

14 2 6 2 6

38 13 6 3

39 4 6 2 8 455 75 6 2 8

131 13 6 2

305 200 6 2

5 10 6 1

9 16 6 3

41 20 6 2

8 27 5 1 6

246 91 5 2 7 14 7 5 2 7

3 3 5 2 7

3 13 5 3 1

1 0 5 2 4

3 12 5 1 4

45 10 5 2 5

44 7 5 2

44 32 5 2

79 79 5 2

49 16 5 2

11 10 5 3 165 12 2 1

18 0 2 1

18 5 4 3

31 2 2 5

181 62 4 6 63 7 2 7 71 2 2 7

68 9 2 7

56 2 2 2

95 9 2 3

152 23 2 3

66 4 2 3 101 11 2 3 41 3 2 3

66 4 2 3

73 12 2 3

155 25 2 3

20 0 2 3

211 56 2 5

89 4 2 5

6 16 3 5

45 5 2 5

22 1 2 6

10 11 4 6 3 21 1 6

0 1 2 6 3 15 1 6

4 6 2

4 4 2 10

4 7 2 7

80 8 2 8

94 5 2 8

86 25 2 8

96 11 2 8 35 2 2 8

80 9 2 8

47 3 2 8

53 12 2 8 187 21 2 9

6 11 2 9

5 2 2 9

24 29 2 9

42 1 2 9

94 12 2 9

20 3 2 9

7 2 2 9

16 3 4

2 4 3 22 1 2

31 1 2

6 2 2

6 12 3

1 4 1

5 17 2

37 1 2

6 3 2

109 13 2

69 12 4 12 32 3 4

22 26 3 6

33 10 2 6 49 4 2 7

17 5 2 7 60 0 2 7

9 2 2 7

60 6 2 7

50 32 3 1 370 95 2 1

1 4 3 1

40 17 2 1

19 0 2 1

9 18 3 1

81 24 2 1 6 22 3 1

3 23 1 1

11 2 3 1

22 11 2 1

14 9 2 1

5 6 2 1 37 21 2 1

30 32 2 1

3 3 3 3

2 7 1 3 12 20 2 1 3 2 4

10 7 3 4

17 8 3 5

370 31 2 5

110 12 2 5 10 1 2 5

42 53 2 5

1 9 1 6

23 25 2 6 1 8 3 6

5 22 2 6

20 6 2 7

68 11 2 7

30 0 2 7

3 3 4 8

16 1 2 8

7 3 4 8 14 56 3 9

2 3 3 9

9 24 2

5 5 2

4 3 2 6 5 2

267 45 2

21 9 2

7 4 2 33 13 2

48 9 2

148 41 2

8 8 2

25 16 2

25 16 2 33 2 2

32 7 2

18 13 2

27 14 3

30 6 2

11 8 2

65 23 2 2 6 14 3

46 42 2

8 12 2 15 7 2 13 30 3

35 22 2 6

45 25 2 3

11 3 2 4

26 6 2 4

18 5 2 4 34 21 2 4

62 73 2 4

14 15 2 5

8 14 1 10

25 52 3

13 1 2 20 4 4 7

4 33 2 10

0 6 3

11 18 3

109 16 2 22 23 2

7 9 2

18 9 2 7 24 2 7

18 9 2 7

10 6 2 7

4 2 4 4

8 4 2 6

37 24 2 7 41 4 2

12 5 2 8 1 2

6 0 2 8

391 71 2 8 11 0 2 8

14 0 2 8

27 3 2 8

5 0 2 8

18 10 2 8 23 6 2 8

8 6 2 8

6 0 2 8

16 0 2 8 2 12 3 8

28 14 2 8

34 33 2 9

10 2 2 9

69 38 2 1 0 2

62 18 2

21 0 2 2 0 2

17 1 2

7 0 2

4 53 3 4

29 134 1 6 3 16 3

22 45 3

21 21 2

241 54 2

18 27 2

24 35 3 6 54 8 2 1

12 31 2 1

18 7 2

29 1 2 2

13 42 3 3 11 23 3 6

0 8 2 7

5 20 3 10

27 9 2

93 24 2 2

17 32 2 2

40 110 husband (patient) 2 4 17 5 2 4

101 9 2 4

2 10 3 4

2 34 3 4

3 45 1 4

14 19 2 5 41 91 2 6

29 78 3 6

82 64 2 6 19 59 2 6

44 55 4 6

23 28 3 6 87 28 2 6

5 21 3 6 21 14 2 6 16 9 4 6

39 5 2 6

29 3 2 6 5 33 3 7

33 6 4 7

186 33 2 7

385 46 2 7

32 3 2 7

27 8 4 7

68 45 2 7

54 18 2 7 18 11 2 7

45 5 2 7

209 40 2 7 42 19 2 7

96 10 2 7

94 45 2 7

52 8 2 7

114 18 2 7

65 46 2 7

54 12 2 7

94 29 2 7

10 2 2 7

101 22 2 7 18 20 3 7

18 14 2 1

37 15 2 1 20 23 2 1

7 10 2

167 46 4 1 25 32 2

11 92 3

2 42 1 3

27 22 4 3

25 23 4 3

0 36 1 3 13 62 1 3

11 3 2 3 52 43 3 4

37 30 2 4

370 66 2 4

23 10 2 4

17 18 2 4

65 36 2 4

4 3 2 4

10 10 2 4 26 44 2 4

6 10 2 4

17 30 2 4 29 17 2 4

4 4 3 4

14 14 2 4

19 19 2 4

21 35 1 4

6 0 2 4

3 1 1 4 193 22 2 4

12 10 2 4

10 16 2 4

6 0 2 4

13 6 2 4

14 6 2 4 8 61 1 4

29 26 2 4

11 52 3 4

4 1 2 4

7 90 3 4 11 16 2 4 1 21 1 4

25 17 2 4

4 8 2 4

9 3 2 4

21 29 2 4 108 91 2 4

5 16 2 4

45 13 2 4

8 15 2 4

0 17 3 4

220 63 2 5 5 19 Stage 7 3 5

118 11 2 5

14 11 2 5 27 4 2 5

87 61 2 5

321 67 2 5

31 4 2 5 98 23 2 5 49 5 2 5

35 6 2 5

128 30 2 5

148 86 3 5

2 1 2 5

92 10 2 5

25 2 2 5

51 3 2 5 14 124 1 5

2 30 1 6

1 38 3 6

16 20 4 6

19 2 2 6

4 20 1 6

43 55 2 6

7 17 1 6

80 33 4 6

7 90 3 6

1 3 1 6

37 1 2 6 5 65 3 6

22 20 4 6 16 8 2 6

2 0 4 6

7 47 2 6

21 24 2 80 3 2 14 26 1

31 9 2 8

515 48 2 8

19 11 4 8

91 5 2 8

0 6 2 9 20 15 2 9

4 1 2

57 19 2 9

50 78 2 9

48 2 2 3

19 3 4 9

3 0 2 9 29 21 2 9

16 7 2 9

15 19 2 9

26 37 2 9

24 43 2 9 10 41 3 9

65 45 2 9

14 7 2 9

28 20 2 9 28 20 2 9

29 26 2 9

32 30 2 9

56 23 2 9

3 11 3 9 58 19 2 9

9 15 2 9

8 0 2 9

193 14 2 9

11 3 2 9

39 54 2 9

2 0 2 9

14 24 2

47 79 2

81 33 4

33 16 2

2 54 1 4 12 3 7 3 2

82 1 2

3 11 1

2 35 1

46 18 2

1 13 3 42 29 2

192 46 2

26 27 2

102 83 2

4 30 1

3 16 2 95 32 2

89 63 2

75 31 2

80 14 2

105 49 2

57 49 2

30 25 2

137 70 2

27 2 2

111 76 2

33 14 2 16 20 2

10 9 2

30 38 2 27 7 2

92 41 2 36 24 2

58 39 2

70 82 2

83 44 2 11 32 3

50 65 2

10 6 2 24 1 2

30 5 4

17 27 2

32 13 2

28 12 2

64 65 2

17 10 2

97 83 2

25 1 2

3 4 2 2 29 1 3 147 14 2 6

183 27 2 7

215 24 2 7

159 18 2 7

161 17 2 3

138 25 2 5

50 20 3 9

58 7 2 1

10 6 2 1

7 5 1 2

8 4 2 5 102 25 2 6

40 2 2 6

114 20 2 3 77 15 2 3

2 4

33 3 2 8

25 67 2 9

74 9 2 10

5 10 2 10

30 46 2 4 9 2

54 54 2

23 8 3

2 18 2 118 2 2 7 144 17 2 7

150 17 2 7

213 24 2 7

15 32 3 10 143 3 2 250 118 2 8

1 8 3 3

2 3 1 5

8 22 1 7

18 86 3 7

19 21 2 1

3 7 2 1

1 9 3

3 9 1 1 5 11 2 1

1 0 3 1

0 14 3

20 10 3 2

7 4 2 4

2 8 1 4 2 21 1 6

9 24 1 6

3 6 4 6

2 0 4 8

11 37 3 8

2 5 4 8

74 49 2 9 40 31 2 9

32 70 1 9

14 10 3

3 30 3 9

29 18 2 10

7 14 2 10 18 10 2 10

3 21 3 10

2 12 3

15 10 2

0 4 2

8 38 3

3 9 1 2 8 3

19 2 2

201 61 2

7 21 3 6 7 3

0 15 1 6 9 64 1 1

14 40 3 2 7 1 4 3 30 1 4 2 1 1 4 2 10 1 5

7 35 1 6

4 15 1 6 4 17 1 6

0 2 1 6 2 5 1 6 2 6 1 6

0 2 1 6

1 8 1 6

7 19 1 6

3 8 1 6 6 54 1 6 1 0 2 6

2 21 1 6 5 13 1 10 31 1

0 5 1 3 8 1

2 17 1 8 45 1

1 3 1 20 16 2 2 7 1 5 9 1

0 10 3 29 1 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 2

4 8 2 6

55 3 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 7 29 38 2 7 18 9 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 7 12 8 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 7

17 15 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 7

16 6 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 7 25 26 2 7 35 5 2 7 52 0 2 7

16 3 2 1 31 9 2 3

14 7 2 3 37 7 2 3

62 11 2 3 18 3 2 4 57 12 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 5 32 10 2 5

78 71 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early4 2018 6 209 85 2 6

25 20 2

66 28 2 6

272 308 2

24 23 2

14 7 2

49 85 2

23 16 2

25 17 2 17 8 2 8 3 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 8

36 2 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 8 102 12 2 8 30 7 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 9 81 9 2 9 51 9 2 9

41 3 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 10

24 4 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 10

42 18 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 10

56 15 2 10

35 14 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018

7 11 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018

102 73 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 74 41 1

16 8 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 24 30 Alz diagnosed late 2017/early2 2018 8 5 2

17 6 2 39 25 2

57 23 2 21 13 2 176 43 4 1

4 12 3 5

10 3 2 6

43 40 4 7

11 25 2 7 22 29 2 2

10 7 2 3

18 79 1 4

0 15 2 6

7 59 3 6

8 50 1 6 18 96 1 6 152 7 2 8

124 31 2 9 18 83 1 10

43 9 2

19 93 1

7 7 3 28 56 1 30 129 1 26 15 2

0 10 3 2

17 12 3 5

35 18 2 5

39 6 2 5

97 12 2 7

4 17 2 7 28 14 2 7

44 30 2 3

196 16 2 3

83 11 2 3

37 8 2 3

42 4 2 3

4 5 2 4 8 11 2 3

64 5 2 3

62 21 diagnosed Jan 2018 3 4

5 4 2 4

173 72 2 5

158 46 2 5

62 18 2 5 63 14 2 5

5 3 2 5

8 38 1 6

16 22 2 6 13 17 1 6

73 13 2 7

69 20 2 8

27 10 2 9 20 11 2 9

368 144 2 10

27 113 2 10

23 22 2 10

21 34 2 10

10 14 3 10 11 26 3 10

16 31 2 10

7 7 2 10

192 68 2 10

10 13 3 10 144 40 2

34 6 2 127 35 2

41 14 2

16 16 2

177 40 2

96 25 2

5 4 2 6

4 0 2 6

12 9 2 7 46 11 2 7

41 35 2 7

19 20 2 1

9 19 1 1

71 33 2 3

11 18 3 4

117 21 2 4

15 9 2 10

17 60 3

20 101 2 10

56 31 2 10

31 10 2 10 32 14 2

16 4 2

39 16 2

53 21 2

2 2 1

19 45 2

7 15 1

16 23 2

52 52 2

19 22 2 10 9 2

24 24 3 6

120 43 2

4 5 2

16 14 2 91 35 2 142 66 2 93 33 2 98 36 2

127 42 2

32 25 2 5 7 2

59 54 2 31 10 2 7

89 5 2 7

5 0 2 1

2 18 1

109 22 2 74 422 1 2 4 1 2 10 1

13 8 2

27 30 2

215 50 2 6 107 9 2 7

15 16 2 1

98 58 2 4

37 13 2 4

310 76 not the main caregiver - daughter2 5 148 19 2 8

434 119 2 8 257 87 2 10

3 13 2

21 17 2

61 27 2

77 24 2 46 25 2

73 13 2 33 18 2

22 11 2

17 8 2

145 8 2 2

142 57 2 1

258 38 2 1

133 34 2 5

46 12 4 5 2 1 4 6 6 14 1 6

0 11 1 6

23 33 3 8

3 8 3 10

72 19 2

274 51 2 40 11 2

66 22 2

64 38 2 7

39 14 2 7

48 12 2 7

30 17 2 7 10 1 2 3

47 25 2 3

29 5 2 3

64 7 2 5

103 7 2 5

54 13 2 5

4 21 3 6 13 46 3

72 8 2

216 88 2 8

302 139 2 8 150 98 2 8

138 16 2 8

34 31 2 10

31 7 4 40 12 2 6 107 11 2 6

32 3 2 6

24 3 2 7

71 15 2 1 94 19 2 5

22 7 2 8

614 263 2 8

45 6 2 8

19 3 2 8 242 26 2 8

98 8 2 9

114 22 2 10 72 14 2 10

43 15 2 10

103 34 2 10 77 11 2 10

22 10 2 10

100 39 2 43 5 2 10

21 5 2 10

28 5 2 117 48 2 12 1 2

10 4 4 2 1

40 6 4 2 2

12 2 4 2 3

87 18 4 2 7

17 12 4 2 1

13 39 4 1 1

8 0 4 2 1

22 3 4 2 1

30 8 4 2 1

22 10 4 2 1 3 30 4 3

3 1 4 2 1

16 16 4 2 1

6 8 4 2

8 6 4 2 3

22 18 4 3 3

6 5 4 2 3

18 2 4 2 3

1 2 4 2 3

23 1 4 2 3

37 53 4 2 3 6 0 4 2 1

3 3 4 2 3

3 0 4 2 4

36 12 4 2 4

8 4 2 4

1 1 4 2 4

2 1 4 2 4

3 4 4 4 4 11 7 4 2 5

96 19 4 2 5

11 7 4 2 5

8 6 4 2 6

8 12 4 2 6

24 4 2

20 18 4 2 6 10 4 4 2 6

8 0 4 2 6

22 2 4 2

44 5 4 2 5

104 20 4 2 5

2 7 4 1 7

2 1 4 3

23 3 4 2

25 2 4 2 5 10 4 4 2 7

12 6 4 2 9

19 3 4 2 9

20 6 4 2 9 6 4 4 3 9

6 0 4 2 9 66 76 4 1 9

2 4 4 2 26 1 4 2 10

3 3 4 1

20 4 4 2

2 0 4 2 41 10 4 2

14 17 4 2

22 13 4 2 47 5 4 2

6 8 4 2

11 4 4 3

20 9 4 2 5 3 4 2

47 23 4 2

43 10 4 2 5 6 4 2

14 21 4 2 7 4 4 2

16 8 4 2

17 19 4 2

5 7 4 2

18 13 2 6

7 79 1

9 0 2 10

1 19 1

6 16 2 172 33 2 3

1 24 1 3 49 57 2 3

4 26 1 4

7 34 1 6

2 16 1 6

6 44 1 6 18 26 2 8 2 51 1 8

12 2 2 9

31 58 3 10 10 33 1 10 10 60 1 10

6 43 1 10

5 16 1 10

2 5 1 10 2 16 1 10 46 68 1 10 6 46 1 10 9 49 1 10

3 12 1 10 8 73 2 10 5 32 1 10 9 8 2 10 19 16 2

71 67 2

8 11 3

15 19 6 2 4

31 2 6 2 3

2 24 6 3 4 1 15 6 3 4

2 17 6 3 4

5 9 6 3 4

550 114 6 2 5

22 0 6 2 5

3 19 6 1 6

15 52 6 3 6

1 8 3 5

3 7 3 1 38 39 1 4 3 14 3 4

22 34 3 6 0 3 1 6 2 14 1 6

10 8 3 10 29 16 2

94 79 2

11 19 1

23 1 2 4

10 24 2 4

148 14 2 7

37 12 2 7 5 9 3 1

2 2 1 6

59 13 2

3 11 3 8

101 6 2 8

7 0 2 8

36 9 2

12 12 2

9 16 3

7 3 2 1

50 8 2 1 9 0 2 1

23 13 2 1

40 8 2 2 47 12 2 2

35 6 2 4

15 2 2 4

20 12 2 4

9 8 2 5

7 5 2 5

9 6 2 6

39 5 2 6 20 8 2 7

40 1 2 7

22 1 2 7

44 5 2 7

10 0 2 7

7 0 2 7 26 4 2 7

71 0 2 7

85 6 2 7

23 2 2 7

11 0 2 7 45 1 2

7 21 2 3

1 4 2 3

27 11 2 3 15 18 2 3

19 0 2 3

34 8 2 3

6 1 2 3

28 30 2 3

18 0 2 3

11 0 2 4 9 2 2 4

13 6 2 4

31 5 2 4

54 23 2 4

6 3 2 4 17 7 2 4

16 8 2 4

33 10 2 4

72 11 2 4

13 8 2 4

34 4 2 4

57 10 2 4

11 4 2 4

26 16 2 4

25 4 2 4 7 1 2 4

38 1 2 4

36 2 2 5 198 54 2 5

145 66 2 6

9 5 2 6

36 11 2 8

7 1 2 8 102 7 2 8

41 1 2 8 114 6 2 8 26 13 2 8 136 14 2 8

9 9 3 9

64 14 2 9

44 14 2 9

27 3 2 9 14 7 2 9 10 0 2 9

16 7 2 9

19 5 2 10

10 5 2

14 1 2

33 6 2 19 17 2

23 6 2

11 2 2 47 12 2

8 5 2

14 5 2 19 10 2

5 2 2

15 8 2

31 9 2

20 12 2

14 6 2 6 4 2

17 47 2 6

20 14 2 7

10 32 3 7

22 26 2 7

67 22 4 7

7 3 4 1

21 4 2 1 5 0 2 1

85 59 1 1

25 26 3 2

15 6 2 4 29 18 2 4 134 247 1

0 3 3 6

5 2 2 6 0 8 1 6 149 194 1

75 32 2 8

39 8 2 9

86 39 2 10

70 33 2

36 3 2 5 27 2

44 16 2

44 28 2

113 88 2 7

87 56 2 7

2 31 3 7

35 1 2 7

82 20 2 7 2 15 3 1

15 12 3 1

6 8 3 1

241 33 2 3

19 36 3 6

4 5 3 9 4 15 1 10

51 34 2

37 25 2

106 76 2

21 77 3 1

75 19 2 1

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4 22 3 1 66 22 2 1

1 13 3

3 16 3 2

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3 6 1 3

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61 31 3 5

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6 24 3 9

0 21 2 9

13 27 3

55 66 3 9

25 20 2 9

0 13 2 9 40 23 3

6 2 1

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8 59 3

38 27 2

35 53 2

4 9 3

10 4 2

33 64 3

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6 1 2

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17 2 1

120 22 1 6

92 6 2 7

148 30 2 9

72 1 2 9 165 13 3 9

70 23 2 9 13 6 2 9

17 1 2

2 22 3 7

2 25 3 3

13 61 4 2

4 23 3 6

8 43 3 11 25 2 10

7 1 2 10

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38 32 2 10

2 6 2 10

3 41 1 10

6 17 3 10 3 0 3 10

29 20 3

2 28 3 6

5 14 3 6

11 23 2 7 10 67 1 1

0 1 1 1 3 13 1

16 26 1 4 346 172 1 6 121 113 1 6 12 66 1 6

0 5 3 7 0 3 1 28 121 1 8 1 28 1

347 88 2 7

214 34 2 7

536 174 2 1 49 9 2 1

26 4 2 1

29 17 2 1

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13 3 2 1

47 14 2 1 17 11 2 1

373 138 2 8

14 0 2 9

31 8 2 1

23 8 2 10

142 76 2 10 48 29 2 10

22 8 2

1 10 1 3

12 36 3 3

75 18 2 1

4 30 3

38 9 2 5

90 13 2 5

117 12 2 8

43 32 2 9 6 10 1

62 30 2

26 95 1 1 37 116 1 1 7 52 1 1

3 14 1 4 37 152 1 6 13 4 1 6

204 91 1 8

31 57 3 60 77 1 35 56 2

104 272 1

188 158 1

137 118 1

7 21 1 1

262 19 2 7 94 11 2 1

109 11 2 5 19 70 2 5 56 1 2 5

14 8 1 5

22 4 2 10 72 38 2

36 31 1

16 23 3

31 49 1

11 32 2 5 49 124 2 6 18 60 1 6

6 46 3 6

2 37 3 4

15 31 2 4 12 19 2 4

7 29 2 4

69 7 2 3 6 3

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34 24 2

6 36 3 6

23 26 2 9

77 64 2 9 39 23 2 9

30 39 3 9

46 73 2 9

83 43 2 9

167 37 2 9

122 79 3 10

13 11 2 5 49 3

30 23 2

24 18 3

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27 17 2 4

164 60 2 6

26 45 2 9 42 15 2

6 5 3

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13 5 2

28 20 2

40 28 4

30 23 2

39 29 2 40 31 1 79 23 2 8 2 2

46 20 2

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101 56 1

32 18 3

11 34 1 6

124 52 2 8

41 17 2 8

51 50 1 8

70 27 1 8 56 12 2 8

45 156 1 8

95 38 2 8

52 11 2 8 329 30 2 8 12 17 4 1

20 49 2 6

23 6 2 5

207 69 2 8

94 68 2 8

32 14 2 10

6 16 1 47 35 2 18 0 2

2 12 1

111 20 2 3

11 37 3 4 73 26 2 6

120 11 2 7

12 0 2 3

82 16 2 5

5 12 2 6

14 37 3 10

20 26 2 10

21 26 2

49 22 2

26 13 2 95 16 2

78 17 2

49 64 2 7

23 4 2 7

20 4 2 7

4 3 2 1 33 59 1 6

19 57 1 8 4 16 1 8

56 17 2 8 13 18 2 9

6 15 3

16 13 2

45 11 2

110 40 2 32 23 2

41 7 2 19 43 6 2 7

12 69 6 3 6

66 166 6 2

8 24 6 3

449 12 6 2 8 174 78 6 2 8

204 183 6 2 8 229 227 6 3 8

109 105 6 2

104 129 6 3

15 47 2 4

9 7 2 7

7 2 2 7 4 10 3 7

34 16 2 1

32 11 2 1

8 5 2 3

12 20 2 3

13 20 2 3 18 10 2 3

2 17 2 3

6 1 2 4

11 6 3 4

219 48 2 5

28 117 3 6

44 53 2 6 2 20 3 6 33 73 1 6

16 37 1 6

24 25 2 7

26 15 4

28 43 3 8

3 14 2

6 18 3 54 28 2

6 18 3

7 38 1

19 9 2

4 17 3

13 10 2 7 13 2

7 39 3 1

3 23 3 1

2 9 1 4

27 105 3 7

24 120 3 7

22 44 2 7

1 10 2 7 410 356 2 10

3 16 1 10

8 20 3 10

3 10 1 10 1 18 1 10 15 34 3

6 11 3

149 34 2 6

127 8 2 7

122 30 2 1

83 74 2 1

100 82 2 1 1 7 1 2

54 1 2 8

45 7 3 9

0 13 3 10

133 91 2 10

63 24 2

3 15 1

35 21 2 18 14 2

7 12 2 1

5 16 3 3

7 6 2 4

217 49 2 8

37 30 2 24 46 3 9

54 54 2 9

43 11 2 10

102 58 2 10

7 23 2

51 43 2

22 22 2 28 19 2

24 4 2 6

55 52 2 7

26 16 2 3 36 29 2

102 65 3 8

88 12 2 8 469 147 2 8

13 12 2 9

21 1 2 9

24 4 2 11 14 2 4

2 17 3 4

20 28 2 7

55 34 2 2

82 14 2 2

58 42 3

2 7 3

89 45 2 7 67 8 2 7

3 5 2 8

6 4 2

15 26 2 9

58 26 2

6 10 3 3 18 3

2 14 1

3 5 2

29 25 2

46 25 2

141 122 2 1

120 45 2 1 44 41 2 1

23 28 2 1

122 114 2 9

24 69 2 10

86 62 2 170 117 2

87 67 2 20 100 3 144 36 2 7

7 13 2 3

2 13 1 3

19 107 3 4 19 4 2 4

5 1 2 5

6 9 2 7 23 15 3 9

3 0 2

10 92 1 213 41 2 3

21 63 1 4

6 6 2 6

61 120 2 7

74 9 2 2

8 12 2 3

4 8 1 4

205 36 2 8 250 34 2 8 9 0 2 8 17 31 2 9

30 17 2

89 25 2

26 42 2

6 15 1 7

1 3 1 7

4 16 3 1 213 47 2 8 11 1 2

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4 7 1

7 11 2 5 0 2 7 186 41 2 3

4 10 3 3

4 10 1 3 1 6 1 6 19 102 1 6

251 98 2 8

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55 12 2

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11 22 2 1 6 11 2 1

1 38 3

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8 16 2

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6 20 2

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0 1 3 až 4 3 3

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136 5 2 5

68 11 2 7 26 8 4 8

24 3 4 8

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51 4 2 7

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16 46 3 9

68 101 3 17 68 2 6 28 1 10

66 47 3

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54 26 2

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0 11 1 1 26 42 1 3 6 26 1 4 40 57 2 6

63 105 1 7 10 26 1 10 155 121 2

100 81 2 14 27 2 20 40 1

210 119 2

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19 11 2 1 25 4 2 1

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38 2 2 6 45 8 2 7

106 17 2 7

127 23 2 7

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93 13 2 2

57 20 2 3

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16 8 2 5

794 291 2 8

111 28 2 8

49 2 2 8

235 104 2 9 113 17 2 9

44 22 2 10

6 15 2 10

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9 30 2 6

3 7 2 6

20 3 2 7

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0 29 1 1 4 9 2 3

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6 1 2 4 375 456 1

20 56 2 8

19 0 2 9 13 3 2 9

45 64 2 101 79 2

74 32 2 7

24 29 2 1

41 1 2 1

31 25 3 6 169 69 2 6

112 85 2 8

235 75 2 8

51 30 2 8

21 9 1 8 11 8 3

71 5 2 7

19 16 2 7

9 6 1 7

39 3 2 7

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62 42 2

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51 0 2 4

9 0 2 4 68 3 2 5 164 62 2 6 56 34 1

20 4 2 6

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109 24 2 8

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278 94 2 8

65 19 2 8

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64 23 2 9 3 24 1 9

15 9 2 9 153 66 2 10

46 30 2 10

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10 26 1 3

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38 23 2 7

39 11 2 7 136 12 2 7

117 12 2 7

98 6 2 7

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25 2 2 5

31 16 2 705 237 2 8

510 205 2 8

146 53 2 8

56 51 3 8

10 35 2 9

77 5 2 9

149 46 2 10 61 15 2 10

38 31 3

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48 93 1

196 39 2

77 4 2

185 6 2

178 20 2

44 5 2

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92 79 2

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23 41 2 3

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53 12 2 4 20 3 2 4 78 3 2 4 79 44 4 6

19 8 2 6

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42 4 2 8 285 24 2 8

121 13 2 8 246 28 2 8 231 19 2 9

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219 106 3 7

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57 20 2 8

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75 5 2 4 255 64 2 4

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500 151 2 7 77 21 2 8 109 20 2 8 72 16 2 8 88 35 2 8

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29 6 2 9 2 16 3 9

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22 0 2 113 33 2 2

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7 1 2 8 37 12 2 8

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64 93 2 7

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38 8 2 5 289 198 2 4

4 19 3 6

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35 11 3 259 32 1 65 7 1 6

203 39 1 5 37 10 2 6 85 11 1 6 27 0 1 6

633 126 3 6

163 31 3 6 147 24 1 7

104 29 1 9 42 45 1

207 30 1 CgsDLs

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11

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11

11

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16 Caregiver ID Number of posts Cgs status: 1Patient: daughter 1 mother or dil, 2or wife, mil, 32 husband,father or fil,4 son, 3 wife, 5 other 4 husband, 5 other Michelle Bell 21 10 daughter both parents Cathy Reynolds 63 13 daughter both parents Héléne Barrette 4 70 daughter father Joan Millar 23 14 daughter father Melinda Tangen 51 13 daughter father Eileen Silon 58 15 daughter father Beth Vilker Samreny 80 10 daughter father Camille Meraki Solar 88 16 daughter father Christine Cain 2 13 daughter mother Kate Perry 3 58 daughter mother Andleeb A Joyia 8 7 daughter mother Meriska Anaya Holt 11 8 daughter mother Místy Abraham 12 18 daughter mother Cori Cole 13 7 daughter mother Deborah Lowman 14 39 daughter mother Cara Booth 15 31 daughter mother Nora Generalao 16 51 daughter mother Dee Diaz 17 22 daughter mother Lanell NeNe Barber 18 45 daughter mother Theresa M Yore 20 12 daughter mother Marcie Hop 22 18 daughter mother Theresa Erbe-Neuberger 24 19 daughter mother LaToshia Swann 25 24 daughter mother Lora Pennington 26 73 daughter mother Denise Swanson 29 11 daughter mother Francelia Lynn Baker Trevor 31 87 daughter mother Sharon Robertson 32 25 daughter mother Denise Walsh 37 10 daughter mother Tara-Yostina Elizabeth Stok 38 13 daughter mother Lissa Simpson 41 13 daughter mother Suzanne Thelwell 42 20 daughter mother Tanya Spiegel 43 10 daughter mother Joanne Richards 44 10 daughter mother Hope Sleight 45 14 daughter mother Karen Parikh 47 10 daughter mother Sharon Basner Oliver 48 31 daughter mother Sharon Anne Stone 49 14 daughter mother Carla Posey 50 14 daughter mother Tere Terrazas 57 10 daughter mother Sharon Smith 59 11 daughter mother Nancy Olivo 62 11 daughter mother Charity Yoder-Smith 64 23 daughter mother Jann Magee Turman 65 15 daughter mother Sheila Walter 66 10 daughter mother Heidi Shepherd 68 31 daughter mother Diane Zarkie 69 23 daughter mother Janet Witchoskey 70 28 daughter mother Mez Potter 71 31 daughter mother Wendy Rodriguez 77 10 daughter mother Cecilia Perez 79 26 daughter mother Doreen Pitera 81 10 daughter mother Patty Dickson Poulin 82 10 daughter mother Maribel Vazquez 83 14 daughter mother Mary Zihlman 84 22 daughter mother Kathi Bjerke Wilkerson 86 13 daughter mother Sherilynn Napp 90 10 daughter mother Beth Horton Wilson 91 12 daughter mother Cheryl Davis Stevenson 92 18 daughter mother Lori Culpeper 98 15 daughter mother Jean Connor 99 10 daughter mother Laura Jeans 100 15 daughter mother Anne Tomaszewski 101 10 daughter mother Monica S. Jackling 94 25 dil fil Christine Tello 52 10 dil mil Carole Walker 87 17 dil mil Cruz Cruz 97 16 dil mil Teresa Cochran 93 10 dil mil and fil Loraine Vines 72 11 female female Barb Dee 5 11 female male Chloe Elizabeth Walker 34 14 granddaughtergrandmother Brittany Reyes 60 11 granddaughtergrandmother Daniel Boudreau 6 7 grandson grandmother Stuart B. Jennings 1 26 husband wife Phil Orr 36 17 husband wife Michael Sharlow 39 12 husband wife John Singley 46 15 husband wife Jill Smolley- Triscritti 53 19 husband wife Paul Shanahan 89 16 husband wife Mary Beth Schmidhamer 78 17 sister sister Joaquin Marin 7 32 son mother Rhett Anderson 9 10 son mother Jason Schembri 35 14 son mother Bill Whitfield 40 12 son mother Patrick Trojman 73 25 son mother Jessie Calderon 10 217 wife husband Sandy Meyers Reeve 19 26 wife husband Debra Chesley Selmi 27 32 wife husband Beverly Parsons 28 10 wife husband Cynthia Flores Stanley 30 13 wife husband Maurice Tobey 33 48 wife husband Paula Vaughn 54 10 wife husband Ginger Storts 55 10 wife husband Ann Williams 56 14 wife husband Bettie Sparber 61 15 wife husband Deblen Oke 67 29 wife husband Cindy Hamilton-Tait 74 12 wife husband Linda Thornton 75 16 wife husband Verna Sorensen 76 12 wife husband Cindy Schubert 85 10 wife husband Debbie Olinger Blankenship 95 13 wife husband 2110 Statistics Number of caregivers 100 Number of posts 2110 Average number of posts per caregiver 21 Average number of reactions per post 48 Average number of comments per post 25 Number of text posts 1734 Number of text+photo posts 307 2110 Number of text+video posts 46 Number of text+link posts 23 Highest number of posts per caregiver 217 Lowest number of posts per caregiver 7 grandmother grandmother grandmother

CGs status husband 6 wife 16 son 5 granddaughter 2 grandson 1 n/a 2 dil 5 sister 1 daughter 62 100 Patients both parents 3 father 6 female 1 fil 1 grandmother 3 husband 16 male 1 mil 3 sister 1 wife 6 mother 59 100 Typical characteristics of the question/testimony Number of posts Type of text 1 Question 301 2 Testimony 1454 3 Both 307 4 Recommendation 48 2110

Basic ADLs in % 1 Bathing and showering 19 6.0 2 Personal hygiene (excl. 1) 17 5.3 3 Dressing 14 4.4 4 Toilet hygiene 30 9.4 5 Transferring (functional mobility within the house) 20 6.3 6 Self-feeding, eating/drinking (incl. chewing and swallowing) 62 19.4 7 Communication and interaction (person to person) 157 49.2 319 15.1 Instrumental ADLs 1 Cleaning and maintaining the house 22 7.4 2 Managing money 7 2.4 3 Moving within the community (outside the house/the family) 38 12.8 4 Preparing meals 21 7.1 5 Shopping 4 1.3 6 Taking prescribed medications (incl. discussions about medications) 114 38.4 7 Using the telephone, computer and online communication 7 2.4 8 Entertainment (movies, music, books, pictures, videos) 77 25.9 9 Physical activities, sports 7 2.4 297 14.1 Other IADLs 1 Selection of caregivers and health facilities, moving to a facility 119 13.9 2 Care of pets 18 2.1 3 Safety procedures and emergency responses 67 7.8 4 Sleeping disorders, sundowning 128 14.9 5 Religious observances, holidays, birthdays, anniversaries 76 8.9 6 Health management, maintenance and prevention 64 7.5 7 Social groups and other public events 36 4.2 8 Ageing, death and dying 90 10.5 9 Getting help from family members or people ouside of the family (nurses) 152 17.7 10 Appointments, tests, surgeries 107 12.5 857 Caregivers issues of daily living 10 Quality of health services 18 2.8 11 Change of a health state of the patient (emotions, …) 135 21.2 12 Recognition of close relatives (persons) 42 6.6 13 Exhaustion, the feeling of giving up, guilt 199 31.2 14 Fear of the future 33 5.2 15 Patient´s violent or suddenly radically changed behaviour 103 16.2 16 Caregivers´ positive feelings 26 4.1 17 Financial troubles 48 7.5 18 Expressions on group support, its appreciation in the life situation 33 5.2 637 Average Reactions Comments 23 36 59 22 21 28

standardized value

43 14 57 59.375 38 11 49 51.04167 30 18 48 50 28 31 59 61.45833 12 11 23 23.95833 35 24 59 61.45833 59 20 79 82.29167 35.0 18.42857 71.85714

23 14 37 26.24113 23 19 42 29.78723 70 14 84 59.57447 32 34 66 46.80851 36 12 48 34.04255 18 27 45 31.91489 28 15 43 30.49645 83 22 105 74.46809 24 17 41 29.07801 37.4 19.3 76.1

35 23 58 28.43137 34 12 46 32.62411 26 18 44 21.56863 36 18 54 26.47059 92 22 114 55.88235 40 31 71 34.80392 80 22 102 50 117 49 166 81.37255 41 23 64 31.37255 39 31 70 34.31373 54.0 24.9 103.8

44 43 87 42.64706 34 23 57 40.42553 63 22 85 41.66667 59 39 98 48.03922 48 38 86 42.15686 28 21 49 24.01961 96 11 107 52.45098 21 22 43 21.07843 43 37 80 48.44444444 28.44444 76.88889 120

100

80 extent of communication

Category extent of communicationengagement in content 60 Bathing and showering 8 91 Communication and 40 Personal hygiene (excl. bath and shower) 7 65 interaction Dressing 5 65 20 Toilet hygiene 13 100 Self-feeding (incl. Transferring (within the house) 9 51 0 chewing and Self-feeding (incl. chewing and swallowing) 18 84 Transferring (within the Communication and interaction 100 98

extent of communication extent of communicationengagement in content Cleaning and maintaining the house 32 35 Managing money 29 50 Care of pets Moving within the community 41 54 Selection of caregivers Preparing meals 23 56 and health facilities, Shopping 5 57 Taking prescribed medications 100 45 Using the telephone, computer and online communication32 62 Entertainment (movies, music, books, pictures,68 videos) 100 Physical activities, sports 10 49 Physical activities, sports Entertainment (movies, extent of communicationengagement in content music, books, Selection of caregivers and health facilities, moving87 to a facility47 Care of pets 9 62 Safety procedures and emergency responses 38 26 extent of communication Sleeping disorders, sundowning 71 28 Religious observances, holidays, birthdays, anniversaries58 66 Health management, maintenance and prevention100 67 Social groups and other public events 12 31 Ageing, death and dying 73 100 Getting help from family members or people ouside76 of the43 family (nurses) Appointments, tests, surgeries 86 48 Appointments, tests, surgeries

Getting help from family members or people ouside of the family (nurses)

Ageing, death and dying

Social groups and other Social groups and other public events 120

100 100

extent of communication engagement in content 80

Bathing and showering 60 100 Communication and Personal hygiene (excl. 40 interaction 50 bath and shower)

18 20 0 13 feeding (incl. 9 8 7 5 Dressing chewing and … engagement in content extent of communication 0 Transferring (within the Toilet hygiene house)

extent of communication engagement in content Cleaning and maintaining the house 100 Care of pets Managing money 80 Selection of caregivers Moving within the 60 and health facilities, … community 40 20 Preparing meals 0

Shopping

Taking prescribed Physical activities, sports Entertainment (movies, Using the medicationstelephone, music, books, … computer and online …

extent of communication engagement in content

Selection of caregivers and health facilities, moving to a facility 100 Appointments, tests, 90 Care of pets surgeries 80 70 60 50 40 Safety procedures and 30 emergency responses 20 10 0

Sleeping disorders, sundowning

Religious observances, Social groups and other holidays, birthdays, Religious observances, Social groups and other holidays, birthdays, public events anniversaries Health management, maintenance and prevention