Howdy, Texans!

It’s the final weekend of Fiesta in San Antonio, and one of the Alamo City’s hot- test clubs, Heat – get it…hottest clubs….Heat….moving on – is bringing in two world-renowned DJ’s to close out ten days of fun and frivolity that make SA such a happenin’ place each April. Our coverman, Roland Belmares, provides the hip-swaying, groin-gyrating tunes tomorrow night that have kept the party going around the world for close to a decade, while our feature fella Seth Gold works his twelve inchers to perfection this very evening. Clubs throughout San Antonio will be laying it on thick this weekend, so hop on into your ride and make a bee-line for the River City for a party that you won’t soon forget.

San Antonio’s not the only town that’ll be rockin’ this weekend, as Galveston welcomes WET Galveston 2009 on the island’s East Beach – a six-hour dance party in the sun and on the sand on Saturday that’s devoted to helping the city’s residents continue their recovery efforts after Hurricane Ike. There’s nothing better than dancing on hot sand, and there’s nothing better on the Island than being WET!

Rounding out our content this week are This Week’s Best Bets, Chris Allen’s Groovelines, This Week’s Web, Ask the Man, a tasty edition of This Week’s Porn that features my currently-favorite object of affection, Dimitri Romanov, This Week’s Scopes and, of course, This Week’s Tea – which returns to its regularly-scheduled format of tidbits and tales after a trial-run (read brain fart) of photos only that registered more negative comments in our suggestion box than George W used to get in his inbox. And it’s all right here in a handy little handbook that’ll fit right into your back pocket…or down your boots, if you don’t like panty lines on your Wranglers!

Until next week…we’re This Week in Texas!

BEST CHEST with Jordan Sinclair WED $100 in Prizes Plus All Request Videos with DJ Bryan $3.50 ‘U-Call-Its’

BEST BUNS with Jordan Sinclair THUR and Dannee & Ben ELEKTRIK Nights with DJ Aqualight $2 WELLS 8-11 pm

The BEST in RETRO Concert Tickets SUN $1.00 WELLS Sunday Ticket Giveaway GWEN STEFANI

MAIN EVENT Dannee Phann in conjunction with The Brick, 4117 Maple Ave. Tickets online at THE BRICK present a benefit for www.brickparty.net TURTLE CREEK CHORALE

VIP Party at Mickey’s on Friday, May 8 mickey’s 3851 Cedar Springs Rd. Dallas 214-219-MICK www.mickeysdallas.com

“you may pick up a woman...”

Dear Man: I have to get this off my chest. I’m a les- bian who loves sex. I go out to the bars all the time and pick up strange women and bring them home and have sex with them. I can’t help myself. I’m a nymphomaniac when it comes to sex. I’ve tried counseling to no avail. I just can’t stop. What would you do if you were me? Girl crazy Girl There is nothing wrong with you that isn’t wrong with me. I love sex myself. Can’t get enough of it. Now the only difference be- tween you and me is that I’m a gay male. I use protection all the time and you should also. Just because you are a woman does not mean you can’t get any sexually trans- mitted diseases. Also be very careful be- cause one of these days you may pick up a woman who may turn out to be psy- cho. Just take care and protect yourself. I would not want any harm to come your way. Dear Man: My friends think I am an alcoholic. Now I love to drink but don’t think I have a prob- lem. I party a lot but can hold my liquor. Do Dear Man: you think I’m an alcoholic? I need some advice. I’m 17 and gay. I have Questioning a boyfriend in high school. We want to go to prom together, but are being told that Questioning we can’t by the school. We have even Honey if you have to ask then, yes, you gone to the school district but they aren’t have a problem. Just because you can being very positive about it. Any ideas on “control” your liquor does not mean that who to turn to? you don’t have a problem. I have plenty Running out of time. of friends that tell me they don’t have a drinking problem, they just like to drink. Time Oh please, you have a problem I think to In some cities, they have gay proms for myself. But I don’t judge them. After all it students from all schools to attend. I know is their life. Have you spoken to someone it would mean a lot for you to attend your in AA about your questions? Check your high school prom. Have you spoken to both local Alcoholics Anonymous organiza- of your parents and seen what help they tion and sit with a counselor or through can be? Maybe if they go speak to your a meeting and see if you meet any of the school or even the superintendent of the check points. I hope you don’t drink and district they may be able to do something. drive. I care and don’t want to see anyone I know this is off topic, but in San Antonio injure themselves or anyone else for that this week, a young gentleman was able to matter. keep his hair long because of his Indian heritage when the school wanted to cut Want your questions answered honestly? it. I know it’s not the same thing, but even Email me @ [email protected] and I he was able to prevail. Best of luck and I will be more than ready to give you what you hope you get to dance with your honey. want. Don’t want to hear the truth? Move on Stay strong. and just enjoy the letters sent to me. Happy Reading! And until next issue…Play Safe!

The Guide 2009 Your Source for GLBT Businesses In Texas