In Black and White a Retrospective by James Ernest
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in black and white a retrospective by James Ernest For Nora Someday, all this will be yours. This document contains excerpts from an early draft of Cheapass Games in Black and White, a retrospective of more than 100 original games released by Cheapass Games between 1996 and 2012. This document is meant only as an example of the format and direction of the book. None of the content is final. The historic game material is presented in its original form, except where old addresses and phone numbers have been redacted or replaced. Strategy Hints: About Cheapass Games: Bluff. No matter how many Failure cards you’re We here at Cheapass Games are aware of two holding, try to convince everyone else that you’re out. basic facts about board games: they cost too much, The more Failure cards you can force out of everyone and they are, at some level, all the same. else’s hands, the better. If you ignore the clever shapes they come in, the cheap little plastic pawns are an interchangeable Make as many murder attempts as you can. Even part of most of the board games in your house. So though your first ones will probably fail, you’ll be are the dice, the money, the counters, and just about M A Cheapass Game guaranteed to pull those Failures out of other peoples’ every clever spare part. These parts can account for hands. as much as 75% of a game’s production cost, and Do your best to keep track of how many Failures that cost gets handed to you. If you had your choice, you’d probably invest have been played. If you feel like the hands are thin, a little money in one good set of gaming parapher- KILL Included with this Game: hurry up and make your attempt before everyone gets nalia instead of twenty crappy ones, and then just Welcome to the J. Robert Lucky mansion, a buy the new part of every “new” game. Yet most the chance to draw again. rambling family estate seven miles north of companies insist on selling you the whole package The Kill Dr. Lucky Gameboard, 96 Cards, and If your games seem to be nowhere. It’s a stormy midsummer’s evening, ten W every time; it’s a little like bundling a VCR with every Game Title: Kill Doctor Lucky this Rulebook. W taking too long, or you’re always seconds after midnight. And someone’s just shut videotape. If you need help assembling the board, look at exhausting the deck, it probably Our games come packaged with the bare offStock the lights. Number: CAG 001 LUCKY the snapshot on the back of this booklet. means that you’re making fewer essentials: boards, cards, and rulebooks. If you You have hated Doctor Lucky for as long as need anything else, we’ll tell you. And it’s probably Release Date: Fall 1996 You probably want to tape the board to a stiff murder attempts than we do. you can remember, and you’ve been secretly something that you can scrounge from a game you piece of cardboard. The finished size is 17” x 22”. That’s okay. To speed things up, V awaitingCategory: this perfect chance Board to put Game the old man already have, or buy at a hobby store for less than try stripping out all the F-3’s. down. Maybe he destroyed your family business; we’d have to charge you for it. Players: 2 to 8 DOCTORYou Also Need: Base Value: 2 And, once you’ve got a collection of pawns, maybe you think he’s the leader of the vampires. dice, counters, and money, you can use the same PerhapsMSRP: he’s the $6.00 only person standing between you Worth 5 points in the ©1996 Cheapass Games ones for every Cheapass game. We’ve standardized Pawns for every player, plus a Master Pawn and the family fortune. Or maybe his cat just keeps SittingBAD Room. Graphics, Layout, and Game Design: James Ernest. our designs so your gaming toolbox will last. Designer: James Ernest (another Pawn) for Dr. Lucky. Assistant Design: Rick Fish, Dave Howell, E. peeing in your shrubs. Whatever your reason, it’s For a postpaid copy of our latest catalog, Use whatever you like for Pawns, as long as JordanILL OCTOR Bojar, UCKYToivo Rovainen, various well- send 50¢ to: Cheapass Games, [This was once our good enough toN/A push you over the edge. Now you CREAM Artist: everyone can identify themselves, and the Pawns are Kfed guineaD pigs.L street address]. absolutely can’t wait to take the lying old bastard not much bigger than 1” square. Dr. Lucky’s Pawn out. should be easily distinguished from the rest. And, though you don’t know it, everyone else in the house wants to kill him too. The Board: AmongTake a deep the breath. first Remember block why you’reof games I designed for Cheapass Games, here. And then start sneaking around in the dark. I thought Kill Doctor Lucky was the best.Dr. That’s Lucky’s Estate whyhas 32 it “rooms”, earned including the the first If you run across a weapon, grab it. If you bump 8 hallway/stairways. When you try to kill Dr. Lucky, slot,into #CAG Doctor Lucky,001. give him hell. you must be alone in a room with him. You also can’t Trying to kill Doctor Lucky is pretty easy, as It’s a simple premise. A group ofmake colorful the attempt ifcharacters anyone else can see has you fromgathered long as no one’s looking. But they don’t call him another room. in the“Doctor home Lucky” of for nothing.Doctor He’s J.got Robertan uncanny Lucky, and although they don’t know Sight lines work like this: if someone can stand talent for slipping out of harm’s way. But don’t it, everyone in the party wants to killanywhere him. in one room and look straight through door- despair; after enough tries you’re guaranteed to ways into the room you’re in, they can see you. So, for wearPlayers the old codger sneak down. aroundYou just need thea clever house looking for good weapons and example, someone standing in the Kitchen can see plan, a good bluff, and a little more luck than places to hide. Catch the old man alone(and beand seen youby) people can in thetry Master to Suite,kill thehim, west but everyone else. stairs, the two adjoining hallways, the Trophy Room, So gather in the Drawing Room, shut off the they don’t call him “Doctor Lucky” forthe Winenothing. Cellar, and the Winter Garden. lights, and get cracking. Somebody’s got to kill You can’t see diagonally through doors, so for DoctorWhen Lucky you tonight, try and toit might kill as wellDoctor be you. Lucky, all the other players get to play example, someone in the Foyer can’t see someone in his luck, in the form of Failure cards.the He Carriage usually House. escapes, but your goal is to draw the luck out of everyone else’sImportant hands, note: without the Gallery overlooks surrendering the Dining Hall. It’s a musician’s gallery, like a balcony. You can too much of your own. When the timesee through comes, that wall, you but you can can’t hopewalk though to it. strike the final blow, and finally kill DoctorThis meansLucky! that the Gallery can see (and be seen by) CHEAPASS GAMES CHEAPASS O C every room straight down to the Piazza, plus the Kill Doctor Lucky has been throughNursery andmany the Armory. editions in its twenty year history, including a major overhaul in its 19.5th year. Here is part of the story of how it came to be. Kill Doctor Lucky • 1 Inventing Doctor Lucky I spent my college years at the University of Missouri at Rolla. This “University” was basically an engineering school, teaching almost entirely science and math. Every liberal arts department was crammed into a single building. Actually, half of one building. I spent my free time in the computer lab, writing dumb stories on dumb terminals and sending them to a giant printer somewhere in the basement. I had to write in this weird pre-HTML markup language to make the pages print correctly. Because 1987. One of those dumb stories was “The Butler Wore Black,” the first chapter of an absurdist murder mystery. A cadre of colorful characters with ridiculous names were gathered in the drawing room of a Victo- rian mansion, where the hostess lectured them about their various motives to kill the victim, who at that moment was still alive. Each of the murderers was based on a character in pop culture (for example, Lois Lane and Darth Vader). Here’s an excerpt: Duchess Effing reached the bookcase directly opposite the fire and turned again, walking slowly around the room and gazing at her ten dumbfounded guests. “Some of you know one another, others of you have never met. But you have all been gathered today because of an ac- quaintance you share with this man, Jose Gonzales.” The ten guests murmured in disbelief. Tennie Lynn Phosgene shook her head. “I’ve never seen him before,” she de- clared, her schoolgirl shyness wilting the nearby flowers. “Nor have I,” boomed the muffled voice of Father Grace Harley from behind his black faceplate. “So you say,” the Duchess went on. “But each of you has been in one way or another involved with Mister Gonzales, and…” she paused behind Father Harley, lightly resting her fragile arm on his polished black helmet, “each of you has good reason to want him dead.” 2 • Cheapass Games in Black and White Chapter Two was pretty short.