MARCH / APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 “ Give lightandpeoplewillfindtheirway.”EllaBaker and Poetrymonths IN THISISSUE: Women’s History Why Medicaid Celebrating Expansion? THE LIGHTHOUSE FROM THE MARCH / APRIL 2015 VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 DESK OF... EDITOR Natalie A. Collier Celebrating Women’s History CONTRIBUTERS Bria Griffith and Poetry months Nathan R. Harper Keyaira Sanders Zhane Steen
GRAPHIC DESIGNER Sirita Render The Academy of American Poets GRAPHIC DESIGN INTERN introduced National Poetry Zoë Meeks Month in 1996 to introduce more people to poetry. COVER IMAGE Since its beginning, another country—Canada—has also Salaam Muhammad, begun recognizing the month. “Beyond The Dreaded Abyss”
APRIL IS ALSO JAZZ APPRECIATION MONTH. In celebration, pull out a little Lady Day or Ella or Bird and Dizz. What’s that? Want something a bit more modern? Esperanza Spalding and Gregory Porter will do you just fine.
“I am a woman that came from the cotton fields of the South. I was promoted from there to the washtub. Then I was promoted to the cook kitchen, and from there I promoted myself into the business of manufacturing hair goods and preparations. … Everybody told me I was making a mistake by “Contrary to what we may have been “Give light and people will find their way.” Ella Baker going into this business, taught to think, unnecessary and un- but I know how to grow chosen suffering wounds us but need not hair as well as I know scar us for life. It does not mark us. What how to grow cotton.” we allow the mark of our suffering to become is in our own hands.” bell hooks Madame C. J. Walker in a speech to the National Negro Business League, “She is a friend of my mind. She gather Chicago, August 1912 me, man. The pieces I am, she gather them and give them back to me in all the MARCH / APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 / APRIL 2015 | VOLUME MARCH IN THIS ISSUE: right order. It’s good, you know, when Celebrating Women’s History you got a woman who is a friend of your and Poetry months mind.” Toni Morrison’s Beloved, pt. III Why Medicaid Expansion?
2 THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 pol·i·tick·in \`pä-li-tik-in\ intransitive verb POLITICKIN’ to engage in often partisan political discussion or activity Check here for the latest in politics in the region and resources that might & POSSIBILITIES make your life easier or open you up to another world of opportunities. Medicaid Expansion 101
191,300; Georgia, 409,350; and Mississippi, 130,000. These are the people in the Medicaid Expansion gap who have no options for affordable health insurance. Who falls in the gap?
Of the nearly 750,000 individuals in SRBWI states who fall in the coverage gap, there are fast food workers, barbers, hairstylists, construction workers, and daycare workers. These are all people who make our every day lives easier; in fact, we are many of these people. Who is responsible for this gap?
Said quite simply our elected officials are. Governors Robert Bentley, Nathan Deal and Phil Bryant in Alabama, Georgia and Mississippi, respectively, are. But it’s not just them. The other state leaders have the authority What is the Medicaid expansion gap? to accept federal money to pay for the hundreds of thousands of those under the Medicaid program. Under the Affordable Care Act, it was intended that Despite this opportunity, however, they have chosen to every person have access to affordable health coverage. withhold coverage that could be life saving for many. The law made it mandatory that states expand their Medicaid programs so that low-income people would Why is Medicaid Expansion important? be able to get Medicaid. But a Supreme Court decision gave states the option instead of mandating them to Aside from the nearly 130,000 Mississippians that expand their Medicaid programs. Up to now, unlike 26 would have access to affordable health insurance, other states, Alabama, Georgia and Mississippi have said under the most likely expansion enrollment scenario, “no” to expanding the Medicaid program that would Mississippi would see billions in increased tax revenues help and provide health insurance to nearly hundreds of as a result. Expansion would also bring billions of thousands of people in Southern Rural Black Women’s dollars in federal funds to the state and that would Initiative (SRBWI) states. How many exactly? In Alabama, result in, again, billions in economic activity. Expansion would generate tens of thousands new jobs.
Factoid
In Alabama, Georgia and Mississippi, 15.9, 22.7 and 19 percent of black women reported not having a regular healthcare provider. An even larger percentage of Latina women in Georgia reported no provider at 40.4 percent; there was in sufficient data for the demographic in Alabama and Mississippi. Statistics for men, in general, are even more startling. Visit kff.org for more information. Source: The Kaiser Family Foundation.
THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 3 VOICES Ready! Set! This Sucks! Hut! by Bria Griffith
This is not about the Lingerie Bowl I’m still not sure if he was being
It was a Friday night entirely. But the Lingerie Bowl serious. I thought it best not to ask. and unlike others my age on the small (its existence) is the reason it’s screen so often seem to do, I wasn’t difficult to have these kinds of dressing up for a night on the town. “Would it surprise you to know it was conversations. It’s complicated Instead I was getting ready for a hot against the law for Greek women to balancing individual freedom with bath, soft bed, big bowl of popcorn compete in or attend the Olympics?” I the greater good, and alternatives and hours upon hours of OnDemand asked instead. When he didn’t respond, are limited, if not nonexistent. television. As I settled in to enjoy I compounded the question. “Would it my own version of a sexy weekend surprise you that the reason athletes evening in, my phone buzzed. I had a Initially, I thought Simon was trying to competed naked was to ensure no message. I hadn’t heard from Simon get me riled up. But after a while, it women were competing in disguise?” (name has been changed to protect was evident that this guy was serious. the ignorant) in a while. We talked Then he challenged me to prove him “That’s interesting. I didn’t know for two hours—the last, the most wrong. (If fools could be persuaded by that,” he finally responded. animated. My pulse raced, my face facts, they wouldn’t be fools. But I took frowned and my heart longed for the a deep breath, avoided calling Simon “When was basketball officially beautiful evening I’d planned, Simon an idiot and decided to forge ahead.) a thing?” I probed next. interrupted, and subsequently, ruined. First, I investigated. “I’ve attended “I’m going to Google it. … It I love football. And what started as a sporting events since I was a toddler. says 1892. The first NBA game lively discussion about the differences How many professional sporting was played in 1946.” between college and professional events have you attended?” football ended with Simon trying “What do you think women’s to convince me that women are no “A few,” he replied. attendance rates at those games more sexualized in sports than men. were in 1892 and 1946?” His evidence? Early Greek Olympians “Was it your experience that the competed naked; basketball players women in attendance were pointing “That was a long time ago! I’m sure used to wear short shorts; wrestlers and giggling at the players?” there were some there, though.” compete in matches in Speedos; and Ultimate Fighting Championship “No, not that I recall. Most of “To watch men play in basketball (UFC) fighters and boxers are always them watched the game.” shorts?” I asked sarcastically. shirtless in the ring. For emphasis, Silly Simon added two more points. “Yeah, that’s been my experience “Probably! Nobody really Women only attend sporting events too,” already knowing the answer. understood the game back then.” to gawk at the half-naked male “Why do you think Greek Olympians athletes. He was also adamant that competed in the nude?” “OK, well, basketball shorts have the Lingerie Bowl was proof alone been baggy since Michael Jordan that women were seen as equal “Because men and women wanted started the trend, so why are so many competitors to men in football and to see naked bodies! They had a women going to games now?” their “uniforms” were worn by choice. reputation for being wild,” he said.
4 THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 VOICES Ready! Set! This Sucks! Hut! (continued)
The expectation for women athletes is to be, as in the lingerie football league, sexy first, and then have athletic prowess. For men, however, athleticism is praised and conversations about sex appeal come later, if at all.
“They see money on the court,” he kinds of endorsement deals. Very few And, quite frankly, he was wrong! said while laughing and showing (phenomenal) women athletes are his low opinion of women. able to let their work on the court or I ended my conversation with Simon field “speak” for them without having and drew a hot bath. I’d earned it with “So the only reason a woman, in the to sell sex. Most often, as is the case my physical and mental exhaustion. with the Lingerie Bowl, women have past, went to the game was to see men As I soaked, I thought about my in short shorts? And present day women to play in their bras and panties to childhood. I’m the only girl in my attend because they’re gold diggers. be paid attention to and have their immediate family, but I never want … I think we should stop talking about sports leagues funded. Yet football play with dolls. I wanted to play sports, this and get off the phone,” I told him. players are not playing football in jock straps and cut off T-shirts. especially football, which proved a “Why? Are you upset?” contentious subject between my dad Why can’t women be athletes first and me. The closest I ever got to the and sexy second? Why does sex have “I’m disappointed,” I told him. game was neighborhood scrimmages be part of the conversation at all? and an intramural league in college. Lolo Jones dashed into the public’s I went on to explain to Simon that eye because she was a beautiful The water turned cold, and I stared men’s sexuality in sports is secondary to virgin. And oh yeah, she runs track at my ticket to professional football their talent. Soccer (or football) players … in the Olympics no less. Why at this point in my life: my bra and know how to “bend it like Beckam” was her sex life the topic at all? panties. Yeah, no thank you. because he’s a great soccer player, not because he looks great with his Simon and I said allowed we’d come to shirt off. We know what he looks like a mutual understanding of each other’s half-naked because his skills on the viewpoints, though we really hadn’t. Bria Griffith is a government field preceded him and his looks drew Simon conceded through the concrete consultant with one of the advertisers’ attention. Male athletes examples I offered as our conversation get the endorsements after their skills continued, that women are not largest accounting firms in the are proven on the court or field. treated as athletes, but sex objects nation. Her parents’ favorite that play sports. We got that far. But (only) daughter, she shows Women, however, have to be sexy first as for my agreeing with his viewpoint, her love for sisterhood by and athletes second to get the same I couldn’t. We’d reached an impasse. serving as a YWLI mentor.
THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 5 BLOG Girls Run the World by Zhane Steen
Don’t believe everything people tell you. Being a woman means a lot. Seriously watch who you believe. That’s very It’s a lot of responsibility, balancing and thinking. Women 1. important. Everyone doesn’t mean you well. are valuable, though we see what the media displays, and we have to work harder to remember our value. It’s easy to get into petty disagreements and be disrespectful by Sugarcoating things only covers stupidity downing one another. That’s what we see a lot of, but 2.for so long. It might be who you know, we as women need to stick together. It’s a lot of work. but it’s definitely what you know too.
As a young woman, I face a lot of challenges. Just Live your life as a girl as long as you can. Do what menstruating. Hello, cramps! Of course, there’s 3. you want to do and don’t worry about fixing yourself more. I sometimes deal with jealousy, honestly, up to please anyone. If you’re carrying yourself a certain and my desire to work hard and get things before way to get attention, stop. There’ll be time for that later. somebody else does. I have to ask myself if that’s And maybe when later comes you wont’ even care! really helping me or other girls advance. Keep your joy, virginity and life simple as long as you I do a lot more question asking as I get older, and I’m 4.can. The boys can wait. Trust me. (So can the girls.) learning some things. The guy I thought loved me is no longer around. The friends I thought I had haven’t
always been there when I needed them most. Some God really will direct your path.
of the family that’s supposed to be there for me—so I 5.
thought—has pushed me away. So I wish I learned to be I look forward to learning more as I get older and doing a little more of an independent thinker earlier on. Better big things. When we women stick together, like others late than never. I’m actually getting older and wiser! tell us we can’t, we really can accomplish anything. We run everything anyway. Let’s make it official! I’m still learning and maturing, but I already know the younger generation of girls will someday be the ones taking care of me, so I look to them as though they’re Zhane is a graduating senior of John F. Kennedy me. And there are a few things I’d like to tell them. Memorial High School in Mound Bayou, Miss., and is a 2014-2015 fellow of the YWLI.
6 THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 BLOG Learning Young Passion and Growing by Alijah Steele by Keyaira Sanders Girls young and girls old Making an impact that can be told The Unita Blackwell Young Women’s Another thing I realized from this They come from afar Leadership Institute is a powerful institute is that we black young institute for young women who women must stick together to By bus, plane or car desire to make a change in their make the difference in our world. At this college they have learned communities, and who may one A lot of times we don’t realize how day impact the world. My first powerful we are, and how much we How not to let their intelligence be turned experience with the institute was can change the things that happen the summer of 2014. I learned so in the world around us. I learned People may try to down much during my time with the as young women, we have to begin them—yeah, they may fall other young women that I expect with us. We must be there for one But after that, they are I’ll carry the lessons along with another, even if we have to cry and standing bright and tall me for a long time to come. pick up the pieces along the way. I Old have learned, young know that we can and we will make are just beginning In one short week, I learned this change because we are all very How to change their life how to be comfortable in my strong, empowering women that can into a new living own skin, to love me for me. make our world a much better place. No matter what, ladies, don’t be moved Since I was a little girl, I knew I had The institute was one of the best a special gift to help others, but I’ve experiences I have ever had in my Keep your eyes on the prize realized I can’t help anyone else until whole 17 years of living. I met so That’s what was taught I help myself. Every morning after the many powerful women that helped at Tougaloo institute, I’ve woken up and smiled, me to realize how much more I want chosen to love myself for who I am, in to be a part of this change. I loved spite of what life may throw my way. the experience, and I am looking Movement forward to learning a lot more. I learned about and met a lot of in Parker phenomenal young women that by Pat Parker helped me to realize I am not I am the Black woman alone in this tough world. All of Keyaira Sanders is a part of the 2014-2015 cohort of the YWLI, I am the child of the sun the women in this institute are my is a junior at Vicksburg High The daughter of dark sisters and I appreciate them for School and is currently working I carry fire to burn the world helping me get to where I am now. on a website for teens. I am water to quench its throat I am the product of slaves I am the offspring of queens I am still as silence I flow as the stream.
THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 7 POETRY Dearest Daughter by Nathan R. Harper
I hope you are so Black in flesh and soul You have to use cast iron skillets as vanity mirrors As you understand melancholy is not a derivative of melanin and Photoshop is a thrift store for incompatible and obsolete standards of beauty Their wares would never fit around your hips Would never complement your complexion Or have a shoe size comfortable enough for you to walk in
I implore you Wear your barrettes as service ribbons Locs as tassels Your plaits as military chords Hair brushes as shoulder tassels Let your pompoms be spiked gauntlets And your cheer pyramid be a Spartan phalanx against enemies
I hope losing your virginity will be a ribbon-cutting ceremony Not closely followed by an “under new management” sign put up by a n*gga misleading and using you May your “hoe phase” involve you bedding as many books as you can with authors’ whose names you didn’t catch while checking them out With their dopey cover jackets ripped off like prophylactics in a moment of passion
In time You will find That whatever crooked path you find yourself on Is the collapsible cane of the blind that leads them with straightness and narrowness I hope I can be your guide through the swamps of self-doubt, as we wade through hair stores where weave hangs from racks like Spanish moss
Know that your scars are book marks And your genealogy is an index to locate the ancestors in the book of life As a woman You will never have to “put your dukes up” Because only feigners of feminism will use their fists to imitate the strength that comes from the mounds of motherhood
They say you should watch what you say around children because they’re little tape recorders Well, you will be my messenger to the future And I will be watching what I say Because you will become everything I have said about you
8 THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 POETRY Sorrowful Thank Yous by Nathan R. Harper (adapted for The Lighthouse)
I’m sorry You are the vessel, the sea, and the apartments of spiritual low income ballast that is the belief in what I I’m sorry like crumpled “I’m sorry” can become; you are the flowers You gave me what Mary notes rewritten with the penmanship in the vase on the nightstand Magdalene gave Jesus mastery a toddler’s motor skills passed down from the rocked, yet will allow then discarded in the sturdy hips of grandmothers You gave me what Rita Marley refuse of my refusal only to be gave Hailie Selassie I unfurled on the elementary school To trace the line I came from, I playgrounds of my maturity would have to forego the rough For you recognized me for drafts of my former self and my who I was the first and the I am sorry own sketchy past in order to second time I came around outline daughters in the shape of As men, we see walls put in place For You are Emissaries of Gawd as an opportunity to conquer; we grandmothers that are the flowers deceive to enter these walls; but in the vase on the nightstand I thank my mama for You when y’all build walls, y’all see I thank Fannie Lou for You home, closed doors, and security The shelter I’ve taken in the pitched I thank Sophia for You against us so we come into your tents of the wilderness of my own I thank Destiny for You lives like home invasions, I guess savagery, I can never say sorry enough I thank Unita for You and still you left nature trails out of I thank Sirita for You These walls are insulated with the it that I have made well-worn paths I thank Jean for You pink fluff of our broken promises and that are a legacy of hurt to you I thank Maya for You past failings to block out the sounds I thank Vivian for You of their resounding insecurities; I am sorry I thank Sheree for You I could not grant you empathy I thank Oleta for You Much more than spirit guides to I thank Nikki for You until I emptied the pith of my my metaphysical tourist, you’re I thank Margaret for You excuse to treat y’all like y’all crazy more like the realtor who wants I thank Shirley for You me to buy into heaven by trading I thank Lorraine for You I’m sorry in the ill-conceived philosophies I’ve been renting in the section 8 I thank God
Love takes off the masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within. I use the word “love” here not merely in the personal sense but as a state of being, or a state of grace - not in the infantile American sense of being made happy but in the tough and universal sense of quest and daring and growth.
James Baldwin in “The Fire Next Time”
THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 9 Keep Up With Us TWEETBEAT http://srbwi.org http://www.cdf-sro.org A Twitter History of Unita Blackwell
UBlackwellYWLI @UBlackwellYWLI Mar 18
It wasn’t until 6th 01 Unita Brown (at the 02 grade, at her teacher’s time) was born in 1933 prompting to come up with in Lula, Mississippi. She a “real name” that the two was actually named U.Z. decided she’d be called by her uncle. Unita Zelma. March 18 this year, 03 The family left Lula But the family didn’t 04 Unita Blackwell a few years after stay together long. Unita was born b/c her Unita’s parents split, and turned 82 years old. dad feared for his life after Throughout the day, to mom and daughter settled confronting his boss. They in West Helena, Arkansas. celebrate—in the middle settled in Memphis. of Women’s History Month (apropos, right?)—and 05 Unita’s mom chose A quality education 06 West Helena for ensure the Twitterverse was not a possibility two reasons: she had for the youngster in knew the basics about the family there and there was Mississippi then. (Sound a greater chance she’d vaguely familiar?) woman who lead a life like receive a solid education. few other ever could, we offered a fact or 30. And just 07 Unita met Jeremiah And in 1960, now 08 in case, you don’t follow Blackwell when she with a 3-year-old son was 25. They married a few @UBlackwellYWLI on (Jeremiah Jr., whom they years later in Clarksdale, called Jerry), the family Twitter (don’t admit it aloud, Miss., at the juice of moved to just go follow), here it is the peace. again for you: Ms. Unita’s life 09 In 1964, after two in several 140-characters-or- Once settled in SNCC volunteers had 10 less doses. Mayersville, Unita’s visited her church, involvement in the Civil Unita and six others went Rights Movement began. to the courthouse to take the voter registration test.
11 Unita and Jeremiah lost their jobs the Unita took and failed 12 next day when their the voter registration employers learned they test three times. The fourth were in the group that had time was a charm. gone to register to vote.
13 Unita and Jeremiah lost their jobs the Unita took and failed 14 next day when their the voter registration employers learned they test three times. The fourth were in the group that had time was a charm. gone to register to vote.
10 THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 Keep Up With Us TWEETBEAT http://srbwi.org http://www.cdf-sro.org
15 And to survive, the family In August Unita, her friend 16 received money from SNCC Fannie Lou Hamer and 67 biweekly, Jeremiah worked for others represented the MS the Army Corps of Engineers 3 Freedom Dem Party at the 1964 months/yr and they gardened. Democratic Nt’l Conv in NJ.
17 The group was unsuccessful The US Commission on 18 in getting a seat at the Civil Rights came to Miss. in convention but b/c of their voyage 1965 and Unita testified about the and activism, the national spotlight discrimination she faced trying to was no on MS. register to vote.
19 20 For her outspoken nature and Unita was jailed more than 70 determination, Unita and her times because of her socio- family were constantly harassed. political activism.
21 In the 1970s, through Unita was elected mayor of 22 the National Council of Mayersville in 1976. She was Negro Women, she worked on a the first black woman ever to be development program for low- elected mayor in the state income housing. of Mississippi.
23 Under Unita’s leadership, 24 The Honorable Unita Blackwell Mayersville saw the held the office of mayor 1976- development of public housing, 2001. That’s SIX terms! fire & police depts, a public water system and paved streets.
25 The mayor gained national While she was not a high 26 attention when she traveled school graduate, because of ‘cross country promoting the her activism, a fellowship program construction of low- helped Unita gain admittance to @ income housing. UMassAmherst.
27 Unita was a member of many 28 orgs and received plenty And in 1982, she earned a accolades--too many to name. master’s in regional planning. One of the most notable is her 1992 MacArthur Fellowship.
29 After a whirlwind life from A life this storied should be 30 sharecropping to meetings documented, right? Well, w/ presidents & diplomacy trips, she has a book! “Barefoot: Life Unita is in a nursing home and Lessons from the Road cared for by her son. to Freedom.”
THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 11 HISTORY “Barefootin’: Life Lessons from the Road to Freedom”
“Barefootin’: Life Lessons from the Road to Freedom,” a book penned by Unita Blackwell with Jo Ann Prichard Morris, details the challenges and triumphs of Blackwell’s life from one Mississippi small town, Lula, to another, Mayersville, and all the stops in between. In the pages of the book, one finds a vulnerability many movement builders and sustainers seem loath to share. Choosing to hide their humanity and show only their superhuman selves, we’re led to idolize other leaders, not admire them. But the former mayor of Mayersville, Unita Blackwell, offers us an opportunity to go barefootin’ along her journey with her. The flaws we see, potentate and critters alike we meet, lessons she bought so we could be taught and growing pains all endear her to us on our own roads to freeom.
had taken me years to come to like a loose garment.” As I grew into You don’t have to water down the the place that I didn’t get angry believing more in my own abilities message; I gave it to people straight, It with people like Mr. Harper. and dignity as a human being, I got but sometimes just a little at a time. My first years in the movement, I my angry spirit under control. I found out that rushing into a group was seething with anger. You have I’d never met before with ultimatums to have some anger to get involved I came to find out that one of never works, or not for very long. To in a movement. Mrs. (Fannie Lou) the most liberating things that work with others to solve problems Hamer used to say, “Child, don’t let can happen to you is to face the o to persuade people to consider white folks get you so upset. Don’t opposition calmly, declare your new ideas and new ways of thinking, pay no attention to them. They’re position, and come out feeling good you have to listen to people and try sick.” She’d try to get me laughing, about yourself. We have all name- to understand where they’re coming poking fun with her stories. Gradually called each other in anger. Through from, what their concerns and it began to sink in that my fury wasn’t the years, I had seen that some of the needs are. And then give them some hurting the white folks I was mad at, most “radical” people were the ones wiggle room and time. When you’re but it was eating me up. My anger who sold us out, and some of the solving problem and negotiating was taking away the very freedom I hard-liners have managed to do good through people’s differences— had worked for. It was no longer the things after all. I look at results. I want whatever they are—everybody kind of anger that motivated me; it to know what you can do and if I can needs to feel recognized; everybody was holding me back. I knew I had to trust you. Then I can decide how far wants to come out looking good. free myself from it. “Try to let up off I’m going with you and where I’m not yourself. Don’t take things so hard,” going. That’s the way I think, and I’ve Even at my most angry I never hated my mother would tell me; “Wear life gotten a lot of work done that way. white people. None of my family
12 THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 HISTORY “Barefootin’: Life Lessons from the Road to Freedom” (continued)
hated whites, and that’s the way I household routines had changed. All along. I needed some peace and was brought up. I hated the way I’d of a sudden people were looking for joy in my life that I couldn’t find been treated and the way I was always me, asking me questions about what in my marriage. Or in my work. having to look out for snakes and be to do or what I thought. It didn’t get uncertain and afraid. But I had grown intense until after we got a telephone. Although my job gave me a lot of to see that people can change. It’s not Jeremiah’d answer the phone, and satisfaction, and I felt confident and easy to free ourselves from beliefs the caller would want to talk to me. capable and productive, I carried my and attitudes that have controlled and And he’d say, “Well, I’m here. What personal unrest with me. So I tried guided our lives since childhood. But is it?” And the caller would say, “No, to drown the turmoil and fill the void when they’re no longer applicable, we don’t want to talk to you; we want by drinking whiskey and partying. I think we must do so, to become to talk to Unita.” And this started Since I’m not a person who can mature, free people. If I could expand competitiveness between us. And it drink just a little bit, that only made my own horizons and understanding as got worse and worse. Even though matters worse, both at work and at much as I had, I had faith that others Jeremiah had been supportive of my home. I decided to free myself from could do so, too. My faith became work in the movement—because he alcohol and marriage both in 1971. more steadfast as I saw people willing always was an independent thinker— to open their minds and respect each he was still a man who considered It wasn’t easy to do either of those other and work together. When that himself the head of the household, things, but I’ve never been sorry happens, there’s also no limit to the and my new professional status wasn’t I did. I found myself more able to good that can be accomplished for easy for him to deal with. He just move toward the joy and peace I the betterment of the whole society. couldn’t believe that I was the woman needed, and I became more free he’d married. I don’t want to put and responsible and fulfilled. I was I have to confess that I was more everything off on Jeremiah, because discovering that freedom has many successful at creating harmonious much of what was going on between layers, like an onion or a cabbage situations in the professional world, us was about me. I had changed on the head, and becoming free is an among people I didn’t know, than inside. I guess I was blooming into the ongoing process of peeling them off, I was in my own house. I had been person I really was or wanted to be— one by one. For me it is a spiritual working nonstop at home and around someone who would make decisions journey, which draws upon my the country—being a mother and a on my own and not be hampered. deepest faith in the divine source wife, an activist and a professional and brings me closer and closer and woman. I always managed to work my By 1970, I had come through several closer to my own spiritual ore. trips around Jeremiah’s work schedule stages of self-development. The civil and my son’s school activities—the rights movement had been a crash I haven’t had a drink since way many women have done for years. course in psychology and self-analysis. 1971, and Jeremiah and I But keeping up such a hectic pace took The women’s movement was taking remain friends to this day. a toll on my personal life. When I was hold all over the country—women’s home, Jeremiah and I were arguing lib, as we called it then. And like more and more, about every little thousands of women, I was more thing, and I was drinking too much. As aware of my equality with men, an excerpt from “Barefootin’: Life Lessons from the Road to Freedom,” I’ve said before, the man was a talker and of my power. I never had been chapter 17 “You Don’t Always Have to and he loved to argue, and in those a woman who wanted to sit over in Fight to Win,”188-191. “Barefootin’” is days, I gave as good as I got. As I’d the corner and not say anything. But available at any online book retailer. become more involved in movement the civil rights movement and then and professional activities, our the women’s movement pushed me
THE LIGHTHOUSE | MARCH/APRIL 2015 | VOLUME 1 | ISSUE 3 13 Keep Up With Us http://srbwi.org http://www.cdf-sro.org
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