-/>. f -^ -

NUMBER 50 A'Publication of tf^e GL|my "AUiance o-^ the esee v-^'it .

Get Bruce! Goodbye HPA

New Jersey approves domestic partner legislation M On Jan. 8, the New Jccscy Sta«e iSe^Ejtte ••ymM imti»imm^ w% voted 23-9 to approve a bill granting mm: domestic partners, including same-sex couples, a number of the legal rights the state provides married couples. The Assembly approved the bill on Dec. 11 of last year by a one-vote margin. I' Governor James McGreevy has signed ^•v*^ ,#1, •5 the bill into law. "Today same-sex couples in New Jersey have won a number of rights the state gives to opposite-sex couples when ll||||||||||||P^.^.,:;, it issues them a marriage license," said Alan van Capelle, Executive Director of Empire State Pride Agenda, which is Rochester City Council considers the statewide gay rights organization in neighboring New York State. "While same sex marriage Iicenses it is not yet full equality for same-sex BY SUSAN .lORQAN tion of marriage officers came before couples in New Jersey, it is a step for­ Due to an initiative by openly gay Council. ward. We praise the Assembly and the City Council member Tim O. Mains, "The city clerk dispenses marriage Senate in New Jersey for passing this bill Rochester City Council is consider­ licenses and provides an opportunity for and Gov. McGreevey for promising to ing the possibility of issuing marriage people to register to marry," Mains said. sign it into law." licenses to same sex couples. No legisla­ "Council designates each year certain Turning his attention to New York tion has been proposed, but the mere people (usually the city clerk and her State, van Capelle said, "New York is suggestion has received a lot of media assistant) as marriage officers, who can attention, including an article in The perform marriages as long as they take N.J. partnership continued on p. 13 Washington Blade. . place at City Hall. I have voted against Up to this time, city clerks (as in this for years because the licenses are Ithaca) have been forbidden by the state not equally available. After three or four Department of Health to issue mar­ years of having this annual legislation riage licenses to gay male and lesbian come before Council, they all know couples. 'Tim's going to vote no'. Tim Mains told the Empty Closet "As the issue of marriage rights started that for several years he has registered a to emerge in other parts of the coun- protest vote when the annual confirma­ City Council continued on page 3 School iioard adofits transgendered protections BY SUSAN JORDAN colleagues to let me chair the task force. is important that people understand TTie Rochester School Board added lan­ It seemed like a natural thing to do." that these types of policies will not only guage protecting transgendered students Bowers said that the first step was to protect lesbian, gay and transgendered from harassment to its Code of Conduct correct the policy, and the next step will students,** Howell said, "but will protect in December. be '*to make certain that the District will students who are wrongly perceived as The policy change came as a result model that behav­ being lesbian, gay or for teachers "The board's transgendered. Like 111 Tliis Issue of a presentarion made by local stu­ ior to create a dents, representadves of the Gay Lesbian and administra- respecful and ^sphere Dr. Martin Luther Straight Educarion Network (GLSEN) tors. That is the JT- King, we all look for­ and others on harassment in area schools. harder part.** J- ward to the day that The Board then created a City School Ally Howell, all people are judged District Task Force, chaired by James Co-Facilitator of the Rochester not by the color of their skins, but by the Bowers of the School Board, to examine Transgender Group, and a member of content of their character, but we dare the issues. the Gay Alliance Board, told the Empty to dream that people will not be judged Bowers told the Empty Closet, "For Closet, "The members of the Rochester by their sexual orientarion, gender iden- me, this issue is about making sure lgbt Transgender Group are extremely rity, sex, religion, national origin, or any students aren't experiencing discrimina­ pleased that the Rochester School Board other characteristic that has nothing to tion. I teach at St. John Fisher and wc added transgendered students to those do with a person's character. Dr. King have a sizable gay student and faculty protected under its policies. HopcfriUy» said he had been to the top and had seen popularion, and I've noriced over the the Board will also see fit in the near the other side of the mountain. Berhaps years they haven't been comfortable friture to add protections xo its person­ one day so shall we all see the other side widi coming out.... I have a friend who nel policies for transgendered persons. of the mountain where discrimination of committed suicide partly because of Wc are also anxious and hopdftd that ail Itinds no longer exists. sexual orientation issues. So for me, the die other school boards in Monroe Kitty Moran of GI^EN, a counselor issue has been a combination of petsonal County, the Genesee X^ky* the State wlio has been involved with GJ^EN, and professional experience and political of New York, and the United States will and wlio is a member of the task force, belief. An opportunity presented itself to fr>Uow the courageous leadership of tiie respond to the conununity and ask my Rochester School Board in tliis area.**!! SaHtol B/Mm cnnitittuid on. p. A tx. FEBRUARY 2004 THE EMPTY CLOSET WW w. g a y a I ]

The Hat Auction was the Idea of Beth Bloom and Maureen Viel. They are asking local artists to make hats to be auctioned, LETTERS TO THE EDITOR: in recognition of the fact that many women The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers lose their hair from the effects of chemo­ are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the therapy, and many use hats as well as wigs Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or the Empty Closet. We will print let­ to cover their heads, ters at the editor's discretion and on a space available basis.We will not The late Dr. Trudy Baran was a psy­ print personal attacks on individuals, nor will we be a forum for ongoing chotherapist, peace activist, mother and disputes between individuals. We reserve the right to edit for space and clar­ grandmother, and a proud and vocal ity. We will print anonymous letters If the name and phone number are provided Jewish lesbian. The daughter of early labor to the Editor; confidentiality will be respected. Submissions are due by the 15th of LOCAL STATE NEWS the month at: The Empty Closet, 179 Atlantic Ave. Rochester NY 14607-1255; activists in the garment industry, she advo­ viewpoints • that matter email [email protected] cated for those who could not advocate for LaSharon Haskins themselves. The Trudy B. Baran Memorial Breast Cancer She was a member of RWAP (Rochester Women's Action for Peace) and a found­ BY QAfSV EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR CHUCK BQWEN- Hat Auction is seeking to raise mo''Dupont Circle. The cabbie missed the turn for the car, clothes for the kids, or just to died at age 47 on Dec. 12, after a long help of Kitty Lawrence of Digital Image and Design, who is responsible for much of the call Beth Bloom at 585-256-2214, or email and wc ended up going fully around the circle. help get daily life chores done, when you struggle with AIDS. A celebration of new look, including the logos, which give a more harmonious, tied-together appearance her at [email protected]. M can't do them yourself because of the Trudy Baran her life was held on Dec. 16 at God's to the three sections of the paper. Thank you, Kitty. That trip made me realize could happen to us if a judge effects of the treatment." Cornerstone Tabernacle. Thanks also go (as a distribution route. Mailing how much I enjoy the work issued a ruling in opposition to LaSharon worked in many capacities questions along this line and came to the always) to Don Albrecht, our this month is Feb. 27. of the GAGV, but how frus­ our right to marry. Then we City Council are not "real," and that having religious as an AIDS activist over the years, with conclusion that heterosexual people are Communications Manager, We actually have a lot trating it can be at times. But have an entire new battle since continued from p. 1 faith somehow implies a mandate to a special passion for helping women. She getting 'special rights. So educating folks who since last June has of fun with the mailings. this time, my frustration is not we have a judicial ruling here follow an extreme right wing political served as Vice President of the Rochester There are two shifts on try," Mains continued, "I decided to go about what rights derive locally and what brought the paper out of the due to lack of support by the in N.Y. against us. agenda. Gays seem set to be the "Willie Area Task Force on AIDS (RATFA), Mailing Day: the afternoon beyond a simple protest vote and ask derive from the state is where a lot of the horse and buggy era into the community. (My sincerest of So like the ride around Hortons" of the 2004 election, as shown and previously served as chairperson for envelope-stuffing shift, usually thanks for the financial sup­ why the policy exists, and challenge us research is focused right now." 2ist cj^ntury. Many of our Dupont Circle, we have come by President Bush's state of the union several of RATFA's Rays of Hope confer­ noon to 2 p.m., during which port we received at the end to wrestle with the fact that we have a advertisers already appreciate full circle in Rochester. Over He said that same sex couples often do speech, which implied that same sex ences, that focused on the impact of the we munch goodies (often of the 2003. We exceeded our law that we must not discriminate in Don's invaluable help with the past year, we have sought not have the right to enter the hospital marriage is one of the threats to hetero­ disease on communities of color. producing their ads, and if home-baked) and socialize goal, which affirmed my belief to promote inclusivity by the area of public accommodations. Is rooms of their partners or to make deci­ sexual marriage. while stuffing, sealing and it possible that the state directives are LaSharon founded Positively Alive, a vou haven't checked out our that you are energized by the GAGV's working with community, government sions about their care. Even if they do, Mains said, "It seems to me that much bundling, and the evening bulk mailing in conflict with our intent to treat all support network of HIV positive women new photo "slide shows" on the online EC, new direction.) This time my frustration and business leaders. However, now that when the sick partner dies, the spouse of the opposition that foments against shift, which usually lasts just about an Rochester citizens equally?" in the Monroe County area. She worked you'll be pleasantly surprised.We should is due to too much support! the President has asserted his position (even as a health care proxy or possessing mairiage stems from the wrestling match hour (around 7 p.m. to around 8). We tirelessly to empower women and to also thank Dave Chubb and Sue Irvine at After George W. Bush's State of the that we are second class citizens, we At this time, Council is still research­ power of attorney) has no control over his within the religious community about count and weigh the bundles and put them ensure that the needs of women living AdNet Communit)' News, our printer, for Union address where he stepped on the Rochestarians accept the challenge and ing the question. Mains said, "I'm hop­ or her loved one's remains and may not whether we are really children of God or in sacks to be taken to Jefferson Road P.O. with HIV/AIDS were met through sup­ their patience this past year! rights of lgbt Americans to continue rise to fight for civil equality. Battles ing that one or all of three possible even be allowed by the biological family not. A number of denominations have the next morning (by the editor: any help port, peer mentoring, retreats, work­ We plan to keep adding improvements his political climb, I was contacted by for equality for Americans, especially things will happen. One, perhaps the to attend the partner's funeral. with this would also be appreciated!). 1 hen been welcoming, others are split, and shops and education. and new features over the coming year as members of the Rochester media asking women and African Americans, have /- city can sue the state. Mains said that he does not know we head out by 8 p.m. to disseminate our some arc operily KostUe. TViat debate Born in NorfoVVt, Va. on March wc strive for a more professional-looking, for a local response to the same-sex mar­ been fought in our city, and we will fighe%';>**' "Second, Td like to raise both my how far his colleagues on Council may queer publication around the community. within the religious community scenrvs 13, 1956, LaSharon's family rr\oved to attractive and readable publication. Your riage issue. In one interview, rhe reporter tlieni alstj mi behalf of Igbt persons. colleagues' and the public's awareness of be prepared to go. "The issue is literally Right now the evening shift consists of a to dominate discussion of the marriage Brooklyn when shc was a srrvaW c\\i\Oi. suggestions will be helpful to us, so please ended by saying, "As of yet, no same-sex If you are considering a visit to fh«?««ii^J the tremendous number of civil rights evolving as we go," he said. issue. As gays, we need to raise the level let us know what you think. core crew of five great guys, our very own Rochester City Clerks Office tor a mar- ""^^ She battled drug addiction, incarcera­ couples have applied for a marriage available to heterosexual couples and not Mains hopes rhat the media attention of the discussion to get beyond religious tion and homelessness for many years. Some things, however, haven't changed. Fab Five (now how about some women license here in Rochester." riage licens'e, please understand all of the same sex couples. I believe that as people getting involved???). We've all become will alert people ro the inequity, although hysteria and start talking about civil After her diagnosis wirh HW in 1989, For instance, we have kept many familiar I immediately thought "UGGH!" implications that might arise from your look more closely at those rights, they'll good friends over the years and both shifts local gay activists feel that couples need rights." she made a dec'xsion to live her life zo design elemems, and have even referred to Wliilc I believe it was unintentional, the actions. Make sure you are aware of the appreciate more how discriminatory the look forward to getting together with each much more information before applying Mains S,&Q.S part of the problem as one rhe fullest, and shc developed a person- the distant past. The Empty Closet logo reporter was baiting our community to work of our national organizations in failure to provide those rights is. other every month. for marriage licenses. "It's giving us as a of definitions. "I'm trying to consistently iil relarionship with God. Hev healing on the masthead, with the "M" opening bring the whole marriage issue to a cli­ preparation for the battle here. Check I can't really find words to describe how "Third, I'd like to see if there's any commimity a chance to speak out about use the term 'equal marriage rights,'" he began, and she remained out of prison, like a closet door, harks back to the origi­ max because it made a good story. with your attorney to see if your action much all of our volunteers mean to me angle that we, as a commimity that has the fact that many people would take said. "People keep wanting to use the bought a home in 1999, and obtained a nal logo designed by Sean O'Driscoll in I was right. We received numer­ might lead to a judicial review with a as editor, to the Gay Alliance, and to the a long history of pushing the envelope advantage of this. I have received a num­ term 'gay marriage'. I'm insisting... that bachelor degree from SUNY Brockport 1972, which featured an opening door. ous emails and calls from couples who negative effect that could have a ripple community we serve. There's not enough on civil rights, can use to play a role in ber of emails from people saying they'd there's no such thing as 'gay marriage'. in 2002. Another thing that hasn't changed is wanted to start the process and apply for effect throughout the country. room to list everyone, but THANK YOU furthering the battle for equal marriage take advantage of this if they could. I can There's marriage and either it's accessible LaSharon's wish would have been our need for volunteers. We're always a marriage license right away. While this On Feb. 22, from 3 p.m. to 5 p.m., and a big hug to Don S., Jeff G., Jeannie, rights." safely say that I want the same opportu­ to everyone or it's not. When we can that expressions of love for her be sent looking for good reporters, photographers, the GAGV will host a gathering of Tom and Peter, Jim E., Jim W, Deanna, would normally have been great news, Mains said that some of the civil nity to make the same choice to confirm put faces on (gay couples) and detail the to Positively Alive, care of the Health reviewers and proofreaders. Please call me national and locai lgbt leaders to explain Jeff Y., Tom K., Mark, Dick, Mar], Sherrill, I become concerned that an unplanned rights denied to gay and lesbian cou­ my life commitment with marriage, that kinds of situations that put people in Association HART Program, 250 East at 244-9030 if you're interested. what the implications of applying for Eric, Troy, Gerry, Ove, Julie West, Erik reaction to the media could jeopardize ples include health insurance; even with heterosexual people have." untenable situations because they don't Ave., Rochester NY 14604. We don't need as many word processors a marriage license could mean. Please, Libey, Ricki and our other columnists, the progress we have made and end up domestic partnership, same sex couples At a time when same sex marriage is have rights, (people's attitudes) will start For a personal memory of LaSharon, as we used to, since most of our submis­ doing more harm than good. attend our gathering, get the facts and sions come electronically. What we urgent­ Bob Osborne in Toronto, Doug Meszler must still pay a special tax. "Federal and becoming a major election-year issue, to change. I'm getting a lot of sponta­ see Eric Bellmann's column, p. C5. ii You see, we have been working with have your questions answered. Then, ly need now is mailing and distribution in N.Y.C, Dennis Tucker (and Bird and state governments tax all companies conservatives continue to argue, without neous positive responses from people I let's show the country that Rochester is volunteers. If you can give two or more Bun), the Youth Group members whose ESPA, Lambda Legal, Freedom to Marry with health insurance policies covering a basis in fact, that religion forbids same meet in Wegman's or wherever - from still the leader in civil rights. Being from Newsfronts continued on page 12 hours per month, and have been meaning work we publish, and all the rest of you and other organizations in our move­ domestic partners," he said. "I asked sex marriage, that gay love and families the supportive straight community."Pi the Carolinas, I often recall some of to volunteer, please consider helping with talented, generous people. We couldn't do ment who have "the experience and legal the monthly mailing, and/or taking on this without you! expertise to make sure we take the right Andy Griffith's analogies. When trying steps from a judicial point of view. In his to persuade the citizens of Mayberry to speech, Bush referred to activist judges gather all the facts before taking action, and implied they were pushing their he said, "You never pick a peach until Your confidential GAGV Membership includes an Empty Closet own personal agendas by ruling in favor it's all fuzzed up and this one ain't ready o/ sarne-sex unions, ywiif//^^ ^P^Jp^ ye^. A Publication of the Gay Alliance i of the Genesee Valley NEW YORK STATE'S OLDEST GAY NEWSPAPER 179 Atlantic Avenue, Rochester NY 4607-1255 © All rights reserved ^^__^_ GAGV, 179 Atiantic Ave., Rochester N.Y. 14607-1255. Editor-in-Chief Susan Jordan person or tfte members of that organization. For further We'd like to ask you to information, please write to TTie Empty Closet, 179 Atlantic • 1 year: $15 Ad Sales Richard Nielsen. 585-764-3713 Ave.. 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L J an indication of the sexual or affectional orientation of that THE EMPTY CLOSET Surgery re-writes British man*s hetero­ Riglit wing group's MOCplaiis events for ;-^» I to Many Week, Feb. 9-15 sexual tattoo; he threatens lawsuit marriage pon reveals Lesbian and gay rights activists on Jan. to apply for marriage licenses," added A British man may file a suit against the doctors and hospital responsible for "making mobilizing the affected community and 9 announced sweeping plans for a set of Perry, who was the first openly gay him gay" through surgery that re-wrote his tattoo. unexpected results their allies in the streets of the nation civil rights rallies and other events during and sending a strong message that our member of the Los Angeles Human According to the Daily Mirror, a patient in the Leeds General Infirmary for a heart An online poll on gay marriage by tbe "Freedom to Marry Week," Feb. 9-15. community deserves and demands full Rights Commission and a past delegate bypass operation had a large vein taken out of his leg to replace a section of damaged r%ht wing American Family Association National organizations The Equality equal legal rights, including the ri^t to the White House Conference on Hate artery in his chest. The paper claims that doctors did not notice the tattoo on the leg, (AFA) has revealed figures that the anti­ Campaign, DontAmend.com and to marry," said Tyler. "Accepting any Crimes. which read "I love women.** After surgery, the tattoo read, **I love men". gay group dkl not expect or desire. NATIONAL & INTERNATIONAL NEWS Metropolitan Community Churches, the status less than marriage, for example, Perry noted that his own legal mar­ -77ie Washington Blade; 365gay.com • The Tupelo, Miss.-based hate group announced late last year that they wcHiki worlds largest predominantly gay and civil unions or domestic partnership, riage in Canada this past year to his lesbian church group, are joining hands does not afford us the same benefits as longtime partner Philip Ray DeBlieck Center, Salb says Halpern received very forward results of their poll (asking if g^ Sen. Clinton to with a network of civil rights groups marriage. These so called 'compromises' had increased his commitment to work positive reviews, was promoted to per­ marriage should be legalized in this coun­ Faculty advisor who placed Barney including Marriage Equality and the are supposed to be 'separate, but equal' for marriage equality for all people. manent status in August 2002, and try) to members of Congress. As of Jan. Frank intern is fired; Franic protests National Freedom to Marry Coalition. but in fact, are a form of marri^e seg­ "We plan to use the events of received a performance-related salary 7, around 468,804 people had voted for HRC dinner Their goals are to increase support for regation which treats us as second class Valentine's Weeks as educational events; increase shortly before being fired. legalization of gay marriage, representing The Human Rights Campaign is proud to The nation's largest academic internship marriage equality for same-sex couples citizens. Marriage is a human right, not we're inviting the media and the press told that he was let go due to staflSng In addition to the discrimination 59.6 percent of those taking the poll. Gay announce that Senator Hillary Rodham organization is being sued for discrimi­ and to stop a proposed anti-gay amend­ a heterosexual privilege." to join us all across the country, and we reductions, but Halpern believes that suit filed by Halpern Congressman web surfers had apparently forwarded tli Clinton will deliver the keynote address nation after it fired a worker following ment to the US Constitution. If passed, Already more than 20 cities are plan to use this opportunity to explain there is no evidence to show that any Frank(D-Mass) is demanding answers poll's link to gay e-mail lists, asking that it at the Feb. 7 New York dinner. Rosie his placement of a student in the office the constitutional amendment would organizing civil rights rallies and other why God's gay and lesbian children other employee was terminated at that from William Burke, the President of be circidated widely to supporters of same O'Donnell will be one of the presenters. of Congressman Barney Frank. time, and according to Salb it appears sex marriage. not only prohibit marriages by same events, and national organizers expect should be entitled to full equal rights, The dinner is one of 2004s first The Washington Center. David Halpern was a Program that new employees were subsequendy The option "I favor a 'civil union' with sex couples, but according to some legal that number to double by Valentine's including marriage rights." major gay ftmdraisers during a politically In a letter to Burke the Congressman Supervisor for the added. the full benefits of marriage except for scholars, could also wipe out a host bf Day, Feb. 14. Many gay rights activists Persons wanting to organize Freedom charged election year. In addition to a wrote, "The central point of this is, to be Washingtowa9tiiiigi.v7ini v-/tnLtCenteir "r^^T'"^^^7"^^^""^^^'''^"^^**" / One month ear- the name" garnered some 62,508 votes, local, pro-gay civil rights protections are particularly incensed at the role the to Marry Week events in their com­ speech by one of the lgbt community's very clear, unhappiness at the assertion for Internships and [He] told the Student that he li^,^ Halpern had meaning that in all, over 67 percent of around the country. Catholic Church has taken in promoting munity are encouraged to contact strongest allies, Cheryl Jacques will be that my office was deemed an unaccept­ Academic Seminars did not want him interning in a come out to his respondents support legal recognition for "We're not taking this threat lying the anti-gay constitutional amendment, [email protected]. A free e-mail making her first major address at the able one for a student who had expressed in the wake of the Church's rampant sex in charge of placing "homosexual environment". supervisors after same sex couples. down. Activists in cities across the nation action kit for holding community actions dinner as the new executive director of interest in gay rights, and my additional scandal. students on Capitol ^—M...^.««»_.....i»«»Mii» receiving reports that Only 249,758 people supported the are stepping forward to organize civil is also available by writing too mcccurch. HRC. concern that the individual who had Hill. When the stu­ another gay intern third option, "I oppose legalization of rights rallies," said activist Robin Tyler, "We are not asking for special rights, org. The dinner will draw attendees from recommended the placement lost his dent told Halpern he was interested had felt unwelcome in the program. In homosexual marriage and 'civil unions'." a co-foimder of DontAmend.com and we are seeking equal rights," said veteran To get in touch with local organiz­ across the entire state of New York, as job in circumstances that make me fear in gay rights, Halpern placed him in order to help future interns feel more "I think it's a great response from the Executive Director of The Equality human rights activist Rev. Troy D. Perry, ers, please visit www.DontAmendRallies. well as Connecticut, New Jersey and thp.t his having acknowledged being gay Congressman Frank's office. comfortable, Halpern says he asked his glbt community," said Mark Shields, Campaign. Founder and Moderator of Metropolitan com. Additional resources for same-sex beyond. and having been an advocate for placing Tyler was an organizer and producer Community Churches, a Christian marriages can be found on-line at www. However, the student's faculty advisor supervisors to add an intern with me spokesperson for the Human Rights -Human Rights Campaign • at Calvin College, the Christian school a reference to his „ , . , . . t i i t • for three of the four national Lesbian denomination with 43,000 members in MCCchurch.org. may have played Campaign. "I hope the community will where the student attended college, told and Gay marches on Washington and 22 countries. MCC churches perform Cities currently organizing pub­ volunteer work '-^^ having acknowledged being some role his continue to harness that energy in more Qatk says he'll support gay rights the student that he did not want him in co-founder of StopDrLaura.com, a more than 6,000 same-sex weddings lic events and rallies include: Atlanta, for the Human gay and having been an advocate for dismissal." effective ways." interning in a "homosexual environ­ grassroots organization that helped to every year. "These are weddings that are Broward, FL, Chicago, Columbia, SC, Democratic Presidentaial candidate Gen. Salb says that; The AFA did not remrn calls from ment." On the same day, Halpern's Rights Campaign, placing an intern with me may have stop the anti-gay radio host Dr. Laura blessed by God but denied recognition Dallas TX, Delray Beach, FL, Denver, Wesley Clark said in mid-January that, if the Center has the Washington Blade., so it is unknown supervisor directed Mn Halpern to to the staff biogra- ^i , i - i - j- -in Schlessinger's national television pro­ by our government," said Perry. Ithaca, NY, Lancaster, PA, Little Rock, elected, he will push for passage of a gay not responded to whether the group will fulfill its pledge to assign the student to work elsewhere, phies available to putyed some role in hts dismissal. gram. "During Valentine's Week, Feb. 9-15, AK, Los Angeles, Sacramento, Seattle, rights bill and will order the Pentagon to the notice of suit forward the poll results to Congress. apparently based on the faculty advisor's incoming students. "These rallies across the United States I am calling on gay and lesbian couples Tampa Bay, Tucson, Washington, DC, correct the "Don't Ask Don't Tell" pol­ and Congressman -Ryan Lee, The Washington instruction. Halpern says his are designed to secure civil rights the to go to courthouses, municipal offices and Williamsburg, VA. • icy, which he called "discriminatory" in Frank's office says that there has been no Blade • Halpern, according to his lawyer, supervisors told him that they did not way they always have been v/on, by and marriage bureaus across America an interview with the Washington Blade. want him to become a "poster child" for reply to the letter to Burke. j« S. Micah Salb, protested the decision gay rights. , -The Washington Blade H -365gay.com • ^{ '•ri^ andwas fired the very next day. He was During his time at the Washington NLGTF denounces Pickering appointment Gays, opponents challenge Bush state ol union The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force on Jan. 16 denounced President Bush's On Jan. 21, in his state of the union most cherished document to strip away recess appointment of Judge Charles W. Pickering Sr. to the 5th Circuit Court of address. President Bush reiterated his will­ individual liberty and freedom would be Appeals, ingness to support the right's proposed nothing short of a disgrace." As a segregationist Mississippi state legislator in an all-white legislature in the amendment to the U.S. Constitution Alan van Capelle, executive direc­ 1960s, Pickering opposed measures aimed at expanding voting rights for African defining marriage as between one man tor of the Empire State Pride Agenda, Americans. More recently, as a federal district court judge, Pickering has continued and one woman. said,"This Presidenr came into office to display indifference or outright hostility to issues of racial equality. He opposes However, some commentators said wearing a suit of compassion and (on reproductive choice. that Bush's cautious comments mean Jan. 21) he exposed himself for what As reported by the Jackson, Mississippi Clarion Le^^ernewspaiper, Pickering equat­ that the constitutional amendment will he is, an Emperor with no clothes. The ed homosexuality with other social problems in a 1984 speech before the Mississippi be given a low priority. His statement homophobia in his remarks was pal­ i Southern Baptist Convention, saying that society has been degraded by such things that he would support a constitutional pable, and they diminish the office of as pornography, homosexuality and divorce. ban on gay marriage only if courts con­ the President.... Gay couples live in every Executive Director Matt Foreman issued the following statement: tinued to uphold the right to marry was county of New York State and in pracit- "In a bald attempt to win African American votes at the expense of gay Americans, said to signal a go-slow approach to the cally every county across this nation a. the White House told the media of their plans to unveil a $1.5 billion dollar plan amendment issue. One in four are raising children. Gay to promote marriage (as if the African /onerican and gay communities are mutu­ Conservative Republicans were as families need and deserve the same access ally exclusive communities). Yesterday, the President laid a wreath at the tomb of angered by Bush's caution as gay activ­ all other families have to ciivil marriage Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Today, through a recess appointment, he anointed Open Daily •Monday's ists were by his opposition. The gay Log and the beenfits and obligations the gov­ Charles Pickering to a U.S. Court of Appeals, an individual who has spent his life Cabin Republicans said that Bush had ernment provides with it." 12 Noon-2 AM Martini Madness opposing everything Dr. King stood and fought for. This kind of hypocrisy is both taken a "significant step" toward losing Matt Foreman, Executive Director All Call Martinis $3.50 All Day breathtaking and appalling. We stand in solidarity with the Congressional Black LCR loyalty. of the National Gay and Lesbian Task Caucus, the NAACP of Mississippi and national NAACP, the Leadership Conference Sen. George Allen (R-Va) said that Force, said, "We are appalled by the Early Bird Special on on Civil Rights, and all fair-minded Americans in opposition to this action. the president has shelved the anti-gay President's direct attack on the funda­ -NLGTF m M-F 12:004:00 Wednesday marriage amendment for now. He aid mental principle of American democ­ that conservatives would push for the racy, an independent judiciary. Contrary Two for One Well and Domestic Beer A amendment only if "unelectcd judges go to the President's statement, our courts with Brett from BPM 2AM DID YOU KNOW off on tangents." Happy Hours were not created to enforce the will of WE Also MAKE>« • The Deiiiocratic Nanbrial Committee the people, but to enforce arrd~interpret MF 4:00 8:00 Vahtde Miming and all seven Democratic Presidential the law. Mr. Bush ought to understand Sat Sun 12:00 800 Thursday Nigiits Window Leiflerkng candidates are opposed to what the DNC this, given that he sits in the White 8:00 2:00S2.75 Imported Beer and Vodka MlCdOf Graphics calls "this mean-spirited constitutional House because of court action, not the Banners amendment,r which would lead to the will of the people.... Friday's Happiest Hours immediate repeal of state laws providing "We are also disgusted by the Friday and •i»« kilerlof omce Signs basic benefits to glbt Americans, includ­ President's sanctimonious hypocrisy in 5:00 7:00 $1 00 Well and Domestic ArcNfechMU ing the right of same-sex couples to visit saying how the debate around denying 8:00-10:00 $1 00 Budweiser Saturday Nights Sandblaslea ^gns one another in the hospital. gay people the right to marry is impor­ UtUsHelp DlmensionQUMHers 10:00 2:00 S2 50 Well and Domestic Be^T Democratic National Committee tant. He and the extreme religious and ¥tHif Busii 1.^:-^., Chairman Terry McAulifFe responded, political right to which he is pandering "President Bush's willingness to support arc saying that we - lesbian, gay, bisex­ Stcuid CHIT liom such a mean-spirited measure shows ual and transgender Americans - are not that he is more interested in pleasing entided to equal rights. It doesn't matter 4 00 until 8 00 Ill0 OlOWCfc: ' • his right-wing base than demonstiadng how you say that, it is wrong. At the any compassion towards glbt families. very least, the President needs to have Ca:::h Prizes and Drif^K Specials $'gnbNo\\40S ^signsnoiv. Tliis anri-gay amendment would insert the guts to call it for what it is: utter 153 Liheriy Pule Way (585) 232 4719 .Roch»^stHr NY prejudice and discrimination into the disdain for and discrimination against U.S. Constitution. To use this country's gay people." M A6 THE EMPTY CLOSET w w w. g a y a i: i a n c

will be divided among the groups which Are you HiV+? Tim Tompkins, chair of provide the most wish list-type services, HPA Board, on closing of like ARI." Do you have pain in fundraising organization The typical wishes fulfilled by HPA's Wish List included medication, dental your hands or feet? bills, trips home, eyeglasses, pet care, air BY SUSAN JORDAN conditioners, VCRs or TVs. 'A couple of people are doing better health wise, Helping People with AIDS (HPA), a You may be eligible for a research study non-profit volunteer organization which . since we gave them health club member­ raised money to flind programs and ships," Tompkins said- performed by Dr. Schifltto at Strong Hospital projects providing direct services to He said that giving gifts and pro­ people living with HIV/AIDS in a nine- viding resources to people living with using an investigational drug called Prosaptide. HIV/AIDS, who are often dependent county area, was founded in 1985. The The purpose of this study is to test the organization is now shutting down, after on social services, is a good thing to raising over a million dollars in the past do. However, he reflects, "The amount safety and effectiveness of Prosaptide in of time we put in as board members, 19 years. the treatment of painful neuropathy The founders included Jim Black, we'd be better off concentrating on our Dan Meyers, and Joe Bonvissuto. The careers so we can write bigger checks! (pain in your hands or feet). late Tony Greene, although not a found­ People have supported HPA's projects, but they tended to support more the er, played a major role over the years, as s did many volunteers. Bob Sperr, Patty ones that they thought were fim." Prosaptide is injected under the skin of the Doran and many others contributed HPA's most well known fundraiser endless time and energy. The current was the annual Dining for Dollars event, Dining for Dollars 1992 was held at Midtown Mall. abdomen once a day. There are 8 study board president, Tim Tompkins, spoke held from 1985 until 2001. The event consisted of individually-hosted dinner visits over a 13 week period. There is with the Empty Closet about HPA's his­ need the things provided by a wish Breedy MS RN, Daybreak AlcoholisH•^ni tory and the changing nature of AIDS or cocktail parties around the area, fol­ list. "There's a perception problem out blood work at 6 visits, and nerve conduction lowed by a gala at venues like Midtown Treatment Facility, Elisha House (honra^ care-giving programs. there," he said. Although the need still for the dying). Greater Roches Mall. The decoration and entertainment at 2 visits. If you are eligible, you will receive "It's all been totally done by volun­ exists, he said, "We don't want to com­ Interfaith Network, HIV Adult Progr for the events was always spectacular, teers," Tompkins said. "There was never pete with ARJ and CHN." for Personal Empowerment (HAPP and they eventually drew a large hetero­ $50 for 7 of the 8 visits. a paid staff." He added that for the past A typical list of recipients is that from Maternal and Child AIDS Interventi sexual attendance as well as gay. In 1990, two years, he has personally funded 1991: Action for a Better Community, Program, SS. Peter and Paul Ch the decoration was gigantic blow-ups of some staff, but income from fiandraising Actor's Equity Fights AIDS, ARI, CHN, University of Rochester Medical famous paintings, and a salsa band pro­ events had declined to the point where Anthony L. Jordan Health Center, and the Wish List Fund. Please call Kim for more information the effort and expense put into produc­ vided memorable music. Baden Street Settlement, D. Morrison- (585) 27 3-211A ing the events was greater than the pos­ Tim Tompkins noted, "Neil Parisella sible profits. should be mentioned. An extremely tal­ a "The last few years, we just tried to ented artist and designer, he contributed keep the Wish List going," he said. "We his great skills to Dining for Dollars." look at Communit)' Health Network Dining for Dollars V, in 1990, with the (CHN), AIDS Rochester Inc. (ARI), theme "Paint the Town," was dedicated J.j^ gg?5^p^ and the Strong AIDS clinic, and they to Neil. are all doing pretty well with huge state As the years went on, the income funds and other grants." from the event lessened. Tompkins said, AGL Homes Tompkins said that he feels that peo­ "I think it had a good run and it was a ple in the community are drawn now to good idea. I thought the time had come W©U C©@1L. ©DIFT o o contribute to organizations and projects for it to be replaced by other events," which provide services and identifica­ After the end of Dining for Dollars, tion with people. "HPA never had pro­ events like a wine tasting were tried. Beautiful Homes at mj^ir-'- fessional fundraisers," he said, "and it's However, the changing face of AIDS tough because there are only so many and the many demands on the lgbt com­ resources around. It's been a challenge to munity- for charitable giving meant that Affordable Prices REALTOR"^ keep it going. We have around $30,000 HPA could not continue meeting needs Animas Trader * 7 f^ew Homes on Display at the moment, and we will have cer­ as it was founded to do. "The net from for the tain legal fees to pay for closing up. We the past few years' events has not been * Virtually Hundreds of Plans just gave $5,000 to CHN, and they'll worth the effort," Tompkins said. * Choose a Model or Custom Order Latin American Arts 8 Crafts rename one of their patient examining Tompkins feels that there are still * Single & Multi-Section Plans past di^cade rooms after HPA. 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^1 her name for the first time that day. She founding in 1776; much has changed in former girlfriends and hope that yo Nonetheless we will have marriage Most women in relationships spend had dinner with me. She wiped my tears Getting Married: a and we are lesbians. the last two centuries. their time complaining to their single start to get the picture. I got Lexie lasi with her fur. I swore to never ag^n plan *So when we get married, we will be *So, when we get married, we will be #. year. She was six and a half weeks ok friends. Ail of the best people I know my birthday with a girlfriend. From now quiz bereft of vocabulary. seeking the pot of equality at the end of arc single. My friends ate a group and a beautiful little ball of golden fli s:*?;^ on, it's only with Lexie and my friends,. 2. Separation of church and state the rainbow. if 4 of wonderful women who have great She picked mc. When I went to view th BY MEREPmi REINIGER If I'm dating someone at the time, she's The separation of church and state 4. Bride, groom humor and intelligence, and happen litter, all of the other puppies were jum Wc arc getting married. A Simple sen­ welcome to join us so long as she doesn't is a myth. This myth illustrates that In some cultures, the bride is a total ^^i^rl to be quite good looking. I am sick ing around and trying to get my attei tence. A semantic conundrum. get in the way. the power of organized belief systems miss until she becomes the mistress of of people asking us why we are single. tion. Lexie just came over to me and And quite a vocabidary quiz. Two views on marriage My next debacle was with someone is strong. In this myth, perpetrated by the after-named male. On their wedding /A. We don't know! But damn it; it*s not quiedy between my feet. When I mov< Please take out a sheet of paper. Be who had such lovely blond hair. It's a elected and selected public servants, the day, she is to wear hypocritical white; he a sickness which one needs to be cured a few steps away, she came over and sure to write your name at the top, and mystery to me why she dyed her roots church can not and will not influence wears melancholy black. Then she is to be of. I am a whole person. If I ever have down at my feet again. It was love at fi include your gender, religion, age, politi­ Why my girlfriend is a dog black. Lexie doesn t color her hair. She the decisions of the state. In rhis mytho­ given away by her owner-by-birth to the a long-term relationship, she will not sight. Shc came home with me and cal affiliation, and the state in which you Do you suffer from chronic single syn­ once, in a long-distance relationship also returns phone calls and has never logical state, people (who are mostly subsequent owner-by-tradition. Then, be my other half. I am complete on never once shaking or scared. reside. This information will be used to drome each Valentine's Duy? Don't fret! with a woman who was not yet ready chei'ted on me. After Miss Clairol, I wealthy, mostly white, mostly male) are after the honeymoon, she will be well my own. I was dating a girl at the time correct your answers. Isn't it about time women celebrated being to admit she was gay. I could also tell dated a volleyball player. Her head was elected by a majority of chads. And every groomed in front of the mirror, mirror on was a lot younger than I (1*11 refrain Define the following terms, use each single? Rahel Eden Kent, Esq., takes afresh, you about the women who have told I am very lucky. I have a lot of ftdl of almost as much air as the ball. November, those politicians promise to the wall; she will become ready, willing, naming names to protect the guil word iri a sentence, and then write an humorous, yet sensitive outlook on being me that they were in love with me very close friends who would do any­ Lexie thinks for herself and is much bet­ represent their constituents, constitu­ and able to keep house for seven dwarves. She picked me, too. I never chase gi essay discussing their relationship to our single during a time when only couples when they haven't had a clue as to thing for me as I would for them. I ter at sustaining intelligent conversation. ents who- are variously colored of skin And they live happily ever after. , It doesn't work. It's either futile bcca topic. receive validation— what love is. But I'm not writing this have a family that loves me. I have a And she's awesome with a tennis ball. I and hair, constituents who are differ- Well, that's the story in some cultures. they are not interested, or I find The quite-a-vocabulary-quiz: BY RAHEL EDEN KENT article to bitch and moan (well, maybe career that I enjoy where I can actually also dated a very wealthy drug addict. ently-abled, constituents who are multi- The moral: some people in these United that having a thing is not as great 1. mar riage just a little). help people. And most of all, I have She was great in bed. Too bad that's all beliefed. States want to keep the broom in the As my birthday and Valentines Day wanting it- A few days later, on 2.separation of church and state This article is about a celebration Lexie. She is my one-year-old Golden she was great at. Lexie doesn't do drugs. Yes, my dear readers, it is true; those proper closet. approaches, I become introspective. birthday, I spent the day with a yo 3.equality of dogs and single life at a time when Retriever puppy. Before her I had a Lexie is great to cuddle with in the morn­ politicians put their hands on the bible •In other cultures, it's a different story. This is always a strange time of year girlfriend. It was a great day. As eve: 4.bride; groom only couples in our community receive Shepherd-Lab mix named Checkers. ings and doesn't look like hell because of and those politicians swear, so help me To be or not to be: two brides, two for me. The holidays are over, business approached, she decided to give me a 1. Marriage validation. Especially with Valentine's He lived to be 14 years, eight and 1/2 a prescription hangover. god, to obey th«* laws of the land. *So, grooms; that is a question. Certainly is slow, and I've got a lot time on my body oil massage We will have a marriage. Day approaching, I though it might months old. I missed him so much that when we do get married, there are those of us who want to be hands. I've spent another New Year's Eve My last girlfriend was Miss We will have a marriage ceremony. be nice to celebrate being single. I am I got Lexie only five days after he died. After about 45 minutes of m; Argumentative of 1993. She liked to a wealth of writers will write, neither bride nor groom. There are others with my mother, this time in Las Vegas. We will invite those we cherish to so sick of being viewed with distrust My dogs have been more than my pets. she be^ui to work my inner thii a parcel of pastors will preach, who want to be both. There are some I had a blast. At midnight, I was playing argue about the color of the sky. She was share the special moments of our mar­ by couples that are too insecure in They have saved my life. They have then rolled over and wanted to a pile of politicians will propagan­ video poker. There were no girls to kiss, also extremely angry, messed up, and had riage ceremony. who want to be the Couple or the Ttvo their own relationships to even let me made me want to live at times when I love. It was then that she chose to the nerve to lie and tell me she was in dize, or the One and the One. Perhaps the only my champagne glass. I toasted to a We will celebrate our marriage, our be friends with one or both of them. felt as though there really wasn't any­ that things just weren't going to love with me. Lexie never lies, she's not and a regiment of radios will rail... next Funk and Wagnall's unabridged better year and thought of the year that love, and our friendships at our recep­ I am sick of making excuses for why I thing else to live for. And most of all, with us. During this lovely con because they think that We are less will cite has passed, I had lots of fun, learned new angry, she's well adjusted, and she knows tion. things, traveled to the far east, got my didn't bring a "guest" to parties of both they have given me unconditional love my ex-girlfriend who was sup that the sky is blue. Miss Argumentative than They, because they believe that Bridoom or grooride; unfortunately, Hundreds of people do this every day, heart broken, made some new friends; my straight and gay friends. I am sick and support. take me to dinner, called up and One nation under God is conditional those just don't seem to capture the put up a good front to my friends so so this might not seem newsworthy; all in all, a good year. Not much dif­ of being told, "Ra, ' know such a nice I am going to compare Lexie to my out. Lexie licked my feet and that when we broke up, they all had to and that one lesbian under another is essence. However, we are not included in the ferent from the last one. Another New girl for you. You'll love her." I NEVER ^M ask, "What happened? You guys seemed unconstitutional. Clearly, the separation *So, when we get married, we will not dictionary definition of the word "mar­ Year rolled around and I still didn't have do! This is perhaps the first time in of church and state is a momentous play "here come the brides." When we like such a great couple." We were never riage." a lover. my life where I am going to go out a couple. I was just a couple of shades myth. get married, we will be our Selves, one on a limb and say it. I AM SINGLE We are not included in the definition ¥fhy should shy of my senses for going out with her. 3. Equality Self committing to one Self. In fact, I've been out for 22 years, BECAUSE I WANT TO BE! according to the President of the United s:?'j«f4 All of my fiends love Lexie and we do Equality is the distribution of rights and I've never really had a lover. I've States. There are even some who want a There. I've said it. There are more look great together. Our hair is the same and privileges based on categories had plenty of girlfriends, slept around • buy constitutional amendment to undefined of us single women out there than color. I got a dog with the same color designed to perpetuate the ideals of the enough, but I've never had anything syss^ our reality. long-term — and I've never lived with a those of you who are in a relationship. Long Term hair as me so that 1 couidnt get mad at Founding Fathers. Those Fadiers were lover. (I think that's a lesbian record!) And the single women outnumber her for leaving hair on the sofa. the married ones who are in healthy 1 could give you a lot of reasons why. Are you getting it yet? I've got my relationships by probably 100 to 1. InsuranC' I could tell you about how I was in love friends and dog to talk to and play with. For answers to your questions about why I have fulfilling work to do and the LONG TERM CARE INSURANCE time to travel and search for the greater WAEM UP Tins MONTH WITH meaning of life. No one ever bitches The Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley Presents is right for you...as well as detailed information about at me about the way that 1 squeeze the the 6th Annual Sweetheart Ball significant savings for qualified couples including toothpaste. If you are wondering about sex, that's the only thing that Lexie can't domestic partners help me with — although 1 have met Call Sy Zivan a lot of girls who came over to pet her. 585 586 3105 "Such a cute dog! May I pet her?" Sure. Free personal consultations. No obligation. What's your name? My last dog Checkers used to get me laid all the time. He was so protective; whenever I'd start to make out with a girl, he'd growl at her. I'd All Red Wine always say, "Why don't we go into the with ('ou[M>n - through March 1, t^(K)4 **Bringyour Sweetheart or Meet a Siveetheart" bedroom and leave the dog out here?" I A Special Night swore that the day that one of them fig­ Saturday, February 14, 2004 ured out that we could have put the dog 7:00 p.m. Dinner ir 8:30 p.m. Dancing in the bedroom I'd marry her. Well, I'm Deserves still happily single. Hyatt Regency Hotel, Downtown Rochester I have nothing against marriage. It's For more information: 585.244.8640 fine for some people. Maybe someday Special Food. it'll be right for me. The day that 1 have Ticket Information a twang in my gut when 1 think of life e se .a«3&&- without a person the same way I do \x\ Dinner/Dance Tickets n WoiiHvn s Ni^ht when I think of life without Lexie, I'll ^ s 2^4-03 RESTAURANT & BAR settle down and get married. But until e $40 per person for GAGV members then, I need no other person to define 1 .11 my existence. I honestly believe that if e^ (available at the GAGV or online at www.gayalliance.org) it's right, it'll happen. It's obviously not \\ iiH^ Sense $50 per person for non-members my time yet. And if it never is, that's OK, too. .hull lis (available at Pride Connection, Parkleigh, Outlandish) I would love it if, on this Valentine's Day, all of us single women who out­ Vv\i\ii\ lrl)ni;irv iO, H)i)\ number the attached ones would come $35 members of Rainbow Seniors out as single women and proclaim this ^c^c^ -3-y pm existence as being an acceptable way Dance Only Tickets to live. If we all do come out that $12 per person in advance way, maybe a few of us will meet, and 749 Park Avenue we'll find someone to date for a while. WEDEHNEWINE Remember, it's OK just to date. You $15 per person at the door don't have to move in on the second date Wine Sense, n. a wine and spirits shop 585.271.0590 or the seventieth. And lasdy, if you do where the wine sells itself. Peaturinq DJ Mighty Mic & PJ Chuck Berrvl get married, see me about a prenuptial www.WMrfiiicWbi€^oiii »:?>'. agreement. Rahel E. Kent © 2004

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HomoCorps at CBGB: Dean Johnson's latest edition of HomoCorps brolught together the best queer musalcians on Dec. 13 at CBGB, a renowned rock club in lower Manhattan. Pictured onstage: RLE.

Out of the Darkness, Into the Light: Joan Crowe, 2002 MAC award winner for Female Musical Comedy, signs the AIDS Memorial Signature Panel at the annual World AIDS Day convention at the LGBT Community Center in Manhattan on Dec. 1 ALL PHOTOS PAGES 10-11 BY DOUG MESZLER

Blackout: Rapper Willis Ninja from "Is Paris Burning" at the BlackOut New Year's Party at SBNY.

Saturday Residential New and Old Work Specialists Emery Awards: TeSruary 7, 2004 Serving the Rochester Community for over 20 years Olga Sosnovska, Eden Reigel and Susan Lucci of "All My Children" attend the Emery Awards at Capitale. The Hetrick Martin Institute, home of the Harvey Milk School, salut­ ed on Dec. 4 those making a difference for gay and lesbian youth. Olga and Eden play a lesbian couple on the soap. The Harvey Milk School, for Igbt students who are harassed In publlic schools, was the center of controversy when it opened last September. 'JOM^^JTQ^^ m -'.mm'

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• •^^'»r,riP»k~-y4ttmfWKKKRmi B n! J A P: V A12 THE EMPTY CLOSET WWW. gejyal' ;3'> ran hves one's religious beliefs in feiationshJp was the lead sponsor of the domestic at lower rates, which means, over time; with compassion toward humanity is partnership bill. "This new law extends Interfaith Keep your life insurance less interest may be credited. continued from page 1 what is of utmost importance to us. The EHop In Rates equal rights to another s^ment of our once again falling behind other states in Advocates marics WE RECOGNIZE LGBT persons Back in the early and mid-1980s, New Jersey community. We are talking running smoothly the rights it provides its citizens and its have suilered long enough from social when many people bought whole life about our children, families, colleagues, 13th anniversary; families and New Yorkers will be asking inequality and from hateful religious a^id tmivcrsal life policies, interest rates nei^bors and co-workers and we are BY DAVID C QUICK company*s mortality experience (the dif­ their elected representatives *Why'? I issues declaraticn and political rhetoric. We are tired of the climbed as high as 11 or 12 percent. At happy to welcome them as equal mem­ In conjunction with Sagemark Consulting, ference between how many policyholders urge legislators in Albany to be leaders appalling hurt and violent actions toward the time policies were purchased, projec­ bers of society," said Weinberg. The Interftuth Advcxiates ft>r Lesbian, ,a division of Lincoln Financial Advisors, a die in a given year versus how many were not laggards in makii^ sure that all New LGBT persons. It must stop. Let us tions of future interest earnings on these HRC supported the l^islation in a Gay, Bisexual and Transgender People, registered investment advisor expected to die). Yorkers, including gay» lesbian, bisexual move ahead to begin the h^ing pro­ policies were generally based on these variety of ways, including co-sponsoring Rochester, celebrates its 13th anniversary When's the last time you pulled out Whether you own a whole life or and transgender New Yorkers and their cess. then-current interest rate levels. Those a series of town hall meetings across the as an organization in 2004. your life insurance polic)' and took a universal life policy, a minimum level of families, are made equal under the law." WE GRATEFULLY AFFIRM our projected interest rates were used to help state to build awareness on the issue. "The commimity may have seen us good, hard look at it? If the answer is performance is guaranteed. When one or New Jersey becomes the fifth state to LGBT sisters and brothers, already part policy owners determine the amount HRC members in New Jersey sent hun­ marching in Rochester's July Pride seldom or never, join the crowd. Many more of these ingredients outperform the recognize domestic partners in some con­ of our faith communities — many serv­ and number of premiums that were to dreds of faxes and emails to legislators parade, or participating in the Interfaith policyholders tend to keep their policies built-in guarantees in your policy, policy text and to provide them with a range of ing in leadership capacities — and apolo­ insurers m*;y give excess or dividends be paid to adequately fund the life insur­ in support of the bill, and Carrie Evans, Pride Service in the Roundhouse in buried away in safe-deposit boxes or desk performance may exceed guaranteed lev­ rights and responsibilities. Other states gize for their ill treatment by many of annually. The policy's dividends or excess ance protection. HRC's State Legislarive Lawyer, drafted Genesee VaUey Park at the beginning drawers. For them, out of sight is out of els. In that case, this extra performance include Vermont with its civil unions, our religious leaders. We joyfidly wel­ credits are typically used to buy more But since the end of that decade and portions of the bill. of the Community Picnic, or you may mind. may be used in several beneficial ways: Hawaii with its reciprocal beneficiary come LGBT persons, as we welcome all life insurance, known as "paid-up addi­ until very recently, intetest rates have "The state of New Jersey has again have seen us introduce one of the films A much better approach is to periodi­ to help pay ftiture premiums —- resulting tions." When enough paid-up additions system, California with a law similar people, into our communities of faith. fallen dramatically. As a result, insurance taken a leadership role in pursuit of during the ImageOut Film Festival this cally review your life insurance, as you in fewer or smaller premium payments have accumulated, the cash value of these to New Jersey's bill and Massachusetts WE CELEBRATE the courage of all companies' investments of premium dol­ GLBTI rights.. I am proud of the legis­ past October," IA says. would any other important document, down the line; to be borrowed against; or paid-up additions can be surrendered to where the State Supreme Court ruled on people who have refused to let the voice lars have generally earned a lower return, lature and governor for making this leg­ "Although we are a small group, such as a will or financial plan. This is to increase benefits — either cash value, pay fijture premiums. Nov. 18 that it is unconstitutional to ban of intolerance and violence speak for which means less interest credited to islation a reality. But mosdy I am proud we are growing. About 20 people cur­ particularly important in today's low- death benefits, or both. same-sex civil marri^e. their religious tradition. The determi­ W^th a universal life policy — a flex­ those policies and a slower increase or of New Jersey's GLBTI community for rently attend the meetings we hold interest rate environment. Depending Insurance companies, on balance, are The New Jersey measure extends a nation of these people, especially those ible variety of permanent life insurance possible decrease in their value today ver­ building a large and effective coalition bi-monthly. Our members currently on the type of policy you have and when able to predict their expenses and mortal­ coverage — the insurance protection is number of rights and responsibilities to LGBT persons who meet hatred with sus their original policy projection. that included local, state and nation­ are from a number of faith traditions: you bought it, falling interest rates may ity experience with reasonable accuracy. separate from the savings element. The domestic partners, including hospital love and answer violence with compas­ Whether a reduction in your policy's al organizations....," said Laura Pople, Jewish, Presbyterian, Baptist, Roman reduce your policy's performance in the But interest rates are a different story. policy's cash value is made up of premi­ visitation and medical decision-making sion, is an inspiration to all of us. credited interest rate affects you depends President of the New Jersey Lesbian and Catholic, Catholic, Episcopal, Unitarian long run. In some instances, you may Despite the best efforts of learned econo­ ums and interest earned from which is rights, control of remains rights, exemp­ AND SO WE CALL for an end to all on several factors, such as your age, how Gay Coalirion. Universalist, Metropolitan Community need x.o take some action to keep your mists, stock market analysts, and other taken policy expenses and the cost of the tions on inheritance taxes, state-income religious and civil discrimination against long you have had the policy, and your Evan Wolfeon, executive director of Church, Society of Friends (Quaker), policy running smoothly. There's no need experts, no one knows with certainty insurance. tax deductions for dependents, health any person based on sexual orientation what direction interest rates will take in insurance company's expenses. Certainly, Freedom to Marry, the gay and non-gay Methodist, United Church of Christ. to panic, however. Often, an increase in Earnings on the cash value of your and pensions coverage for partners of or gender identity. All laws must protect the future. As interest rates, expenses, not everyone who bought life insurance partnership working to win marriage Anyone who seeks to make their faith the premium may be enough to keep policy will be determined by your insur­ state employees. It also prohibits dis­ the freedoms, rights, and equal legal and mortality experience change, how­ in the 1980s when interest rates were equality nationwide, hailed the bill as "a community a more welcoming place is your policy's performance on course. ance company's investment performance, crimination in employment, housing standing of all persons. We will continue ever, your policy's performance may also higher needs to be concerned. The drop step in the right direction," but noted encouraged to join. Our next regular Measuring Performajice which is the rate of return it achieves on and credit based upon domestic partner­ to work for and promote the dignity of be impacted. That's why it pays to review in rates does not affect people with term that "states like New Jersey would do meeting is March 21, 2:30-4:30 p.m. With borh whole Xxfe and universal the investment of your premium dol­ ship status and requires insurance com­ LGBT persons and their inclusion in our your policy with your planner from insurance — policies that provide a the country and its families a favor if at the Downtown United Presbyterian life insurance, a portion of the premiums lars. As mentioned, your share of those panies to make available health coverage socio-political, cultural and economic time to time. Your planner can keep death benefit only Those who bought they avoided the detour of separate and Church, 121 North Fitzhugh St." goes toward "cash value." Life insurance earnings will be credited to your policy for domestic partners. life. you apprised of these changes, tell you traditional whole life policies with the unequal and went right to the clarity, IA maintains a lending library, rec­ policies that build up cash value are as interest. "This is absolutely a great step toward To indicate your support for this dec­ whether your policy is affected, and sug­ intent of paying premiums out-of-pocket security, and equality that comes only ommend book and video resources, and often viewed as attractive to own because The amount of interest will vary, of equality for New Jersey's same-sex cou­ laration, please contact Ralph Carter via gest ways of responding. every year also may feel little impact. If with the freedom to marry. maintains a regularly-updated list of faith potential growth in cash value is tax- ples and their families, who have the email [email protected], call course, as market interest rates and invest­ they continue paying the fixed premium, "One of the major benefits of mar­ communities in the greater Rochester deferred. Impact of Interest Rates same need for legal rights and protec­ 585-271-7649, or write to 111 Milburn ment performance change. As interest they are guaranteed to have their cover­ riage is being able to say to your family, area who intend to be welcome places How well your policy performs is Out-of-pocket premium amounts and rates increase, insurers are able to invest tions that all other families do," said St., Rochester NY 14607. To indicate age for life. However, the policy cash your kids, the community, the govern­ for LGBT people. Visit the website, largely determined by three key ingredi­ premium durations on whole life and your support, we would Uke your name, new premium dollars at higher rates, Cheryl Jacques, president of the Human ment, and those you do business with www.lnterfaithAdvocatesLGBT.org universal life policies are based, in part, value they could tap through loans or the name of your religious community or ents: interest rates, the insurance com­ and thereby may eventually credit more Rights Campaign. "While there is great wherever you are, 'I am married,'" said on interest assumptions made at the time by surrendering the policy could be less email [email protected] or organization, your leadership title (elder, pany's expenses (administrative costs interest ro your policy. Conversely, as work yet to be done to ensure that all Wolfson. "There is no verb for civil of purchase. With whole life insurance, than expected. call 585-271-7649 for more informa­ pastor, deacon, member), location, and and commissions), and the insurance rates decline, new premiums are invested couples in the state have full and equal union, and nobody writes songs about tion. phone number (for confirmation). We rights under the law, we celebrate the domestic partnership." "Like many in the community, we signing of this bill as a landmark sign of - Empire State Pride Agenda, will be posting the declaration on the are concerned with the rise of anti-gay Interfaith Advocates website, and will qs?^ progress." Human Rights Campaign; Freedom religious and civil discrimination in the Assemblywoman Loretta Weinberg To Marry • post the names, leadership title, religious IT'S TIME TO (i \> U.S.," IA says, "and are dismayed that community or organization and location much of the rhetoric associated with this on the website, as a public witness of WTiether you just purchased a policy, life insurance discrimination is falsely justified in the our community's commitment to end or are a long-time policy holder, it pays ''iVi-^y^ continued from previous page name of religion. [ After several months this insidious discrimination. For more to review your policy with your plan­ of discussion, Interfaith Advocates has information about Interfaith Advocates ner every year. Your planner can run RcShaheen If you used a short-pay or so-called adopted "A Declaration to End All and its programs, please visit our website, illustrations that provide details on how "vanishing premium" design, lower Religious and Civil Discrimination." www. lnterfaithAdvocatesLGBT.org & Decorating Centers your policy has performed and how ITJSrESS interest rate crediting may concern you. IA invites the community to share this BriUiant Ideas...Beautiful Results your policy may perform in die ftiture, (Because of the life insurance industry's declaration with their friends, especially Theologian to based on current interest rates and other experience with decreasing interest rates religious leaders in the community, and assumptions. If you do not currently speak on faith at in recent years, regulators and the indus­ encourage them to affirm the declara­ work with the agent who sold you your try as a whole have discouraged the use tion. Directions on how to indicate spring forum policy, you can order projections from of the potentially misleading term "van­ your support follow at the end of the die company and review them with your "Christian Faith and the LGBT Professional ishing premiums.") With this design, Declaration. current planner. Experience" will host its Spring Forum you were scheduled to pay premiums A DECLARATION TO END Like any other insurance product, on March 28 and March 29, spon­ Personal Train! out-of-pocket for a set period of time ALL RELIGIOUS AND CIVIL your life insurance needs to be monitored sored by Third Presbyterian Church, — such as seven to ten years — instead DISCRIMINATION Tyairkfrig Sessions as Low as interest rates and other factors affect­ Lake Avenue Baptist Church, Lake of paying premiums for life. After that, WE STAND in solidarity with those ing your policy's f>erformance change. A Avenue Baptist Church, Downtown earnings on the growing cash value were who are committed to work and pray for periodic review and any necessary fine- United Church of Christ and Colgate expected to pay the premiums from then full acceptance and inclusion of lesbian, tuning will help ensure that your policy Rochester Divinity School's Women on. In order for the insurance to carry gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) continues to meet your expectations, and and Gender Studios in Church and itself as intended, however, you generally persons in our faith communities and in avoid costly mistakes. Ministry Program. needed to pay premiums for additional our world. LGBT persons continue to be years before premiums could be paid David C Quick, CSA is a registered rep­ condemned and excluded by individuals The Reverend Doctor Anna Carter from policy values. resentative of Lincoln Financial Advisors, a and institutions, both civil and reli­ Florence of Columbia Theological broker/dealer, and offers investment advi­ gious. This leads direcdy and indirectly Seminary will share her questions, Universal life policies may also be sory service through Sagemark Consulting, to intolerance, discrimination, suffering, insights and passions. affected. These flexible premium policies a division of Lincoln Financial Advisors and even death. Political and religious She will share with us on Sunday eve­ can be designed so that you can pay in Corp., a registered investment advisor,200 rhetoric has monopolized the public ning, March 28 at 7:30 p.m., at Third as much or as little as you like, as long Bring the colors of the rainbow to your home... Meridian Centre Suite 150 Rochester, NY perception of many people on this issue. Presbyterian Church, corner of East Ave. as the cash value of the policy can cover 14618, 585) 350-7234. Insurance offered This stance continues to cripple the and Meigs St. the cost of insurance charges. When it no through Lincoln affiliates and other fine spirit of innocent people. Our religious The lgbt community and friends are »*wiUi help from R. C. Shaheen Decorating. longer can, you will need to make higher a Mom MnraJo* paints, waUpapers^ flooring companies This information should not be faiths compel us to be part of the heal­ invited to a talk on Monday morn­ annual premium payments, or pay the construed as legal or tax advice. You may ing for the souls wounded by this tragic, 17 Morrh r^rtirArr ing, March 29, at 10 a.m. at Colgate and more^for every lifestyle. same premium for more years to avoid want to consult a tax advisor regarding this violent, and destructive hatred. Rochester Divinity School, 1100 S. having the policy lapse prior to your information as it relates to your personal THEREFORE: Goodman St. From cool khaki to fabaloos red - we have your color! death. Deciding which course of acrion Personal Trainiiu * ''k^^M 'Fitness Testing circumstances. WE STAND with other persons of Doctor Florence will be the Hudnut makes die most sense for you depends, faith and also with countless religious Diversity Preacher at Third Presbyterian 1400 St. Paal St. 121 S. Mala St. in part, on your age and sex, the size of 11900 *5«5.473.6960 scholars who find no rational biblical Church, Sunday, March 28 at 10:45 Rochester Fairport the policy, the number of premiums paid Twelve Corners Pla^jp or theological basis to condemn or deny a.m. LouitQcl in to date, and the assimiptions used by 264-1500 223-0200 the rights of any person based on sexual the company relative to ftiture expenses, David Quick P r««3r« StaJi M a st^? r Ycvrk' ^lag-n u m orientation or gender identity. How one mortality and interest rates. ,I ^ , ^• V-•. ^ f:. I «j-. V.';';w•"I 'T; k • ^-•.>..».•.; »-r!*\--'^

AIB A14 THE EMPTY CLOSET w w w. g a y ^1 "!'"•''- I School Board Kitty Moran said that the decision Continued from page A1 Elecrion Forum by the Board was unanimous and not "IVe even hope that the school district will provide told the Empty Closet, "(TheTask Force's) controversial. "The School Board is very Write Vs ¥mr Opinions an Eleetkm 2004 charge was to respond to the group of supportive, for the most part. They want domestic partner benefits like health care benefits James Del Favero community members who made the to provide an atmosphere of respect. for Igbt employees, including school 211 Culver Read presentation to the Board on how stu­ They just didn't know exactly what An Open Letter found their voice on these fundamental Rochester. NY 14607 dents are treated in our schools. The in the Code of Conduct needed to be questions. I call that courageous integ­ task force was formed as a result of this. changed or expanded, which is why they to the QLBT rity. Susan Pryntz is the GLSEN representa­ formed the Task Force." She emphasized task force charge, which is to address "We'd like to have the policy in each Communities I see a leader who is disarmingly hon­ tive on the task force. that the task force and the inclusion of the concerns of the group of citizens school's teachers' manual,** Moran said, est, decent and fair. He is friendly and "Jim Bowers had come to several transgender protection in the Code of who made the initial presentation, and "so it will be very visible to all teach­ To the Editon funny. I sce a leader who, because of GLSEN meetings to see if there were Conduct were Rochester School District then take the next step - which is to get ers. We're even hoping that the school I am asking for your help. You may his authenticity, resonates with Middle THE Barker's Barber any problems in the Rochester school initiatives. teachers. School Board, administrators district will provide domestic partner know me as a long-time grassroots activ­ America. I see a man who could and system," Moran S/id. "He is very gay- Currently the N.Y.S. Legislature is and students all trained in lgbt values benefits like health care benefits for ist in the GLBT movement. From my shoidd be president — a man who can friendly and is aware of lgbt issues, and considering two bills related to protect­ and how you address harassment in lgbt employees, including school staff. work in Oregon against the radical help us take back and reinvigorate this (585) 442-9537 wants the District to be respectful of ing students from all forms of bias- schools." Whatever benefits are provided at any right to the Gay & Lesbian AUiancc great country. Against Defamation, the Human Rights Certified Professional Pet Orooming students. His goal is to create a respect­ related harassment. The Democratic ver­ She said that GLSEN plans a "No level of employment would be extended Tens of thousands of Americans are Campaign and the Gill Foundation, my ful and positive atmosphere for all stu­ sion, the Dignity for All Students Act Name Calling" week the first week in to domestic partners as well. This will organizing locally, building the largest Pick-up & Drop-off Sen/ice Available focus has always been on the work of the dents." (A.1118/S.1925), includes protections March. (See the GLSEN article in the be up to the Board, but that will be our and most powerful grassroots and net- 'field'. My priority has always been real Moran said that the task force exam­ for categories including both "sexual Gay Groups section for more informa­ recommendation." roots campaign in modem history. The people with real lives all across America, ined existing District policies and found orientation' and "gender identity and tion.) Moran added that the task force excitement is not only about Howard especially in those communities often that they were good in the area of pro­ expression". The Republican bill, the Ross Levi has urged the Board to hopes to work with the teachers' union Dean; it is about his belief in us, and his forgotten when movement policy deci­ tecting against anti-gay discrimination, Schools As Safe Harbors Act (S.4023), make the new policy a reality by creat­ to have them provide some of the train­ ability to energize America, t is about sions are made. but not really clear on the issue of gen­ includes "sexual orientation" but fails to ing remedies when harassment occurs, ings. "Some of this training would be lifting us up, as gay people, as people of /'\ der identity and expression. provide language protecting transgender and training teachers to better under­ in the form of voluntary after-school This year, I have joined the Howard color, as rural Americans, as people of Duflfy Palmer, upstate co-chair of the students. In late 2003 the two parties stand bias-related harassment and how trainings and discussions for teachers Dean campaign. He is the presidential faith, as Moms and Dads and blue-col­ Creature Comfort Empire State Pride Agenda, who is also got together to try to resolve their dif­ to stop it. Duffy Palmer said, "This throughout the year. We'd like to see lgbt candidate I can support and respect. I lar workers, as people who, for the first a teacher, invited Ross Levi of the Pride ferences, but could not agree on several policy change protecting transgendered issues discussed, and would like to pro­ think that Howard Dean is a refresh­ time in a long time, want to fiolly engj^e Agenda to a task force meeting. Levi was issues, including the "gender identity students is an important step, but it's vide resources to help teachers include ing addition to the national politick in the democratic process. It's been a Pet Sitters and expression" protection. lgbt materials in their curriculum when landscape. I am moved by his work for able to provide input improving the lan­ only the beginning. The task force will long time since we've had a leader who "Loave us homB...bu} rx:it cjlon^. ' * guage on transgender protection. Kitty Moran commented, "SONDA now work to see that a strong policy appropriate; for instance, when discuss­ the rights of gay and lesbian, bisexual lives by and embodies the principles and transgender people. As Governor of Levi said, "The Rochester School (the Sexual Orientation Non- combating all forms of bias harassment ing Walt Whitman, to include the fact in our Constitution — and a leader Ned L, STtomfeia /Daily Visits (mos*. aoim?stia»t«d pvts) Board is to be congratulated for Discrimination Act, protecting lesbian, is truly integrated into the environment that he was gay." Vermont, Howard Dean put his political who, through his campaign organizing, Owner •P«?f Transportation

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iuiCri*«rflT^ r.~M." «»«***^»«P*W*««(^1»?Bi»«P«? 3 A17| A16 HE EMPTY C! w Vl/ \.v. Q n V 3; u. Come on, give me a break. I would think institutions? No! Any church, temple, or same gender funily, and to encourage a in the past. That is just not true. We In contrast, a no-scalpel vasectomy for emergency treatment of potentially it is better to know, so as not to step in synagogue is ficee to perform, recognize, dialogue to implement a more inclusive have had these things more or less for uses one small pimcture. This procedure life threatening symptoms, it was clear traps and make the same mistakes again. or prohibit such unions. That would not policy, I am forwarding copies of this 30 years, just ask the many people vf^o typically lasts less than 15 minutes and is that P.ochestcr General would not even Yes, you were not involved and can change. Religious institutions are free to letter to our physician, The Gay Alliance tirelessly served this commimity by being performed under local anesthesia. Men accept or recognize the documents or therefore see things without the emo­ make their own restrictions, in the future FROM of The Genesee Valley, and the editor of members of the Board of Directors or can drive home afterwards and return to the primacy of our relationship. tional filter, that is good; but "ignorance as well as in the past. Many marriages The Empty Closet. volunteered for other positions in sup­ work in one to two days. The risks are Equally clear is Rochester General's is bliss**? I think nod in the Bible were between one man and I look forward to your immediate port of the GAGV, or who served for minimal and can include minor bleed­ OUR intention, by ignoring the prirnacy of Then I really got my panties in a knot several women simultaneously. For the attention to this matter and an oppor­ litde pay as staff members. ing, bruising, swelling and discomfort. a partner and requiring a "biological when I read, '*It (ignorance) doesn't effect first thousand years of Christianity, the tunity to work with you to resolve this What Chuck was hired for, I believe, The benefits of a vasectomy include next of kin", to trigger every partner's my ability to reach out to the straight fewer unintended pregnancies (and abor­ church did not want anything to do with Kcso^rs matter— was to improve on what wc had, to take greatest fear — to be separated from her marriage, which was about prof>erty, Carbon copy: Rochester General community begging for their under­ us to new and higher levels of success; tions), lower health costs, fewer compli­ loved one as she lies ill or dying. Based Very truly yours, not spirituality. In the United States, standing and support in our quest for it is not true that we never had these cations and male involvement. upon rhic receptionist's action, I knew Jenniier L. Gravitx, Esq. until after our Civil War, slaves could discriminated against lesbian couple equal chrU rights." BEGGING? What's thin^ in the past. The Gay Alliance The University of Rochester's that had my partner lost consciousness, not marry anyone — not even each other Dec. 30, 2003 source of emotional and physical sup­ with that? I do not want the Executive has been around for 30 years; we must Reproductive Health Program, located had her condition worsened or if she lay — because they were property. Interracial Mr. Sam Huston port. Director or anyone else, to beg for my, have done some things right. We need at Highland Hospital, has started a no- dying. Rochester General would have marriage was still illegal until 1967. If and As soon as my partner came out or anyone else's, rig|its. I am, we arc all, to embrace the promise of the future but scalpel vasectomy service ($99) for inter­ summoned her "biological next of kin," Quarrel with any religion wants to believe that a mar­ Mr. Rocs Peterson, R.N. of triage, the receptionist did an "end human beings, and for the most part, not forget the gpod or the bad of the ested men who don't have insurance cov­ Rochester General Hospital run" around the information I pro­ and not her partner of nine years, to her Bowen column - citizens of this nation; we do not need erage. For more information, call us at riage should consist only of one male bedside. The terror of being separated past. Ignorance is not bliss. "Those who and one female, that is their choice, 1425 Portland Ave. vided, approached her and asked for, to nor should we beg. We demand, we (385)341-6368 or www.strongheatth. from her is a nightmare which continues but he's doing a do not know their history are doomed to they are fi-ee to make that restriction for Rochester, NY 14621 and received from my ill, and unwit­ expect, we advocate for, we work for, com/vasectoME. to haunt me. repeat it." themselves, but there is still separation Dear Mr. Huston and Mr. Peterson: ting, partner, the biological "next of kin" great job etc., our rights. But beg? HELL NO, Let me end by saying, while I have Eric Schaff, MD, Director, Thankfully, my partner received of church and state in this country, and I am writing to inform you that my information she insisted on obtaining. WE DO NOT BEG! some quarrel with his prose, I continue Reprodnctrve Health Program, excellent care. Dr. Kerley, Kristen, her some of us want it to stay that way. The family and I were treated in a discrimi­ Rochester General's policy, as imple­ To the Editor: Just as my blood pressure was getting to be very supportive of Chuck and his Rochester nurse, and Angelina, our hospitality government should not encourage such natory manner in the emergency room mented by the receptionist, discrimi­ I love to read the Empty Closet; it is a great back to normal, I came upon Chuck's leadership of the GAGV. He is doing a technician, were warm, compassionate discrimination. at Rochester General and to request nates against same gender families. I paper, something for all of Rochester's comments about gay men. Not being great job, as is the staff as a whole. His people who made her physically com­ Marriage is a civil your immediate action to resolve the cannot believe that when a wife brings lgbt community to be proud of Each a gay man, I do not feel qualified to point is also valid: we all need to support Is there a persuasive {x>sitive case for fortable and respected our need to be problem. her husband into the emergency room, month I always read Susan Jordan's characterize them as a group, but I can the GAGV with our money, not only for rigiit for everyone marriage? Yes! Marriage, whatever its together. We are grateful to them for Late at night on Sept. 10, 2003, upon suffering symptoms of an apparent heart editorial, Eric Bellmann's column and say I know a number of very generous it to be successfiil, but also for its very imperfections, is a stabilizing structure their expertise and support. Donna has To the Editon the advice of our physician, I brought attack, that she is asked for his "biologi­ then Executive Director Chuck Bowen's gay men. We should not be picking on survival in these hard economic times. If encouraging commitment, caring, and Gay marriage will not destroy the my partner to the emergency room cal next of kin." Likewise, I cannot fath­ made a full recovery. column in one sitting and then, as I have one group. The next thing you know responsibility. Marriage helps connect we don't, then who will? institution of marriage. The current because she was experiencing chest pain om a husband, nervously awaiting the Their wonderfiil care does not excuse time, I read many of the other fine col­ we will be forcing them to wear funny sex with love and commitment. What Sign me Pamela Barres divorce rate, and the fact that one-third and difficulty breathing. triage examination, being asked for his Rochester General's discriminatory pol­ umns and articles that I enjoy. hats or something. The GAGV needs rational society would tell five percent a.k.a. "Annie Rooney^ of the child births are to single mothers, While she was in triage, the nurse wife's sister's name and phone number. icy, which refuses to recognize the sig­ But last month, the Dec/Jan. issue, the support of all our community: les­ of its population that they are banned are threats, but where are the serious asked me to provide the necessary infor­ Had I not been so concerned about nificance of our same gender partners. I just stopped for a while at Chuck bians, trans people, bi people, intersexed from such an institution? Is that the same efforts, and serious resources, to address mation to the receptionist. I introduced my partner's health, I would have been Other same gender families may not be Bowen's column and reread it several people, straight allies and, yes, gay men. No-scalpel vasec­ society that blames gay men and lesbian such fundamental threats to marriage? myself as her partner and proceeded to willing to prove our relationship with as lucky as we were. Had my partner, times, as I had trouble believing what I I wonder if Ms. Tulip would continue to women for promiscuity and then denies tomy has benefits Are TV shows such as "How to Marry a give the requisite insurance and address copies of our health proxies, powers or any other same gender partner, been was reading. Maybe the poor man just get her kibbles and bits if she kept biting them the right to an arrangement that Millionaire" or "Bachelorette," or the 55- information. When the receptionist of attorneys, joint deeds, shared bills unable to communicate her desire for needs a rest. I know he has been working Chuck's hand? To the Editor: promotes monogamy? Is that logical? Is hour wedding of Britney Spears threats asked for my partner's "next of kin," I and bank accounts, wills, partnership us to be together, or lacked the ability very hard for months, so I hope he was In the United States, more women than that Christian? Is that moral? One more thing: Chuck wrote, "Once to the institution of marriage? Society responded that I was her next of kin. agreement, Vermont civil union license to insist on my presence over the objec­ able to get some rest and relaxation over men choose to be sterilized. This is sur­ If the love of two people, commit­ we looked forward to a purposeful future should be concerned with marriage, but The receptionist refused to acknowledge and our upcoming marriage in Canada. tion of a homophobic "biological next the holidays. prising given that a woman's bilateral ting themselves to each other exclusively for the agency and operated it with their focus should be elsewhere, not on our relationship, did not enter my name Although we should not have to pro­ of kin," Rochester General would have A number of things just set me off. tubal ligation is expensive and the risks for the rest of their lives, is not worthy sound, responsible management and fis­ gay marriage. and insisted that she needed a "biologi­ duce them to prove our relationship, been a party to unimaginable emotional Like when he wrote that one of the great cal policies, opened the doors to anyone include those of general anesthesia and of respect, then what is? Gay couples Should procreation be the purpose of cal" relative to reference as "next of kin". unless Rochester General requires proof devastation. things about his job "is not knowing the who wanted to volunteer or be heard..." abdominal surgery. Recovery afterwards deserve the same respect and dignity all wedding vows? Some people intention­ 1 refused to provide the information to of marriage license each time a different In the interest of preventing this history of the area as far as personalities This implies that wc have not had this is slow and can take up to a week. accorded heterosexual couples, and equal make sure that I remained her primary gender person brings his or her spouse in nightmare from occurring to another are concerned". This is a great thing? ally, some without choice, have remained access to tangible benefits. As long as childless. Some choose not to procreate marriage remains exclusively a hetero­ or adopt. Should those with disabilities sexual option, lesbians and gay couples who are incapable of sexual intercourse remain second-class citizens denied for­ be forbidden zo marry? Should mar­ mal equality. Our government should riage vows of non-procreative couples be not encourage such inequalit)'. rescinded or annulled because they can There are some 1,046 federal benefits not or do not procreate? associated with marriage. They include YOUR BODY If gay marriage were allowed, would such things as taxes, pensions, inheri­ it open the door to polygamy or incestu­ tance, immigration, health insurance and ous relationships? No! The reality is that services, care decision making, social a central tenet of marriage is to promote security, survivor benefits, etc. MASSAGE stability, far more Hkely in two-way rela­ Gay marriage does not disparage het­ tionships than in multiple relationships. erosexual marriage, it enhances the very The risk of birth defects in children of institution of marriage. www.yourbodymassage.com close relatives is a powerful reason to James R. Ide prohibit them. 16505 Virginia Ave. C # 221 80 Laney Rd. Rochester New York 14620 Do gay marriages undermine religious Williamsport, MD 21795-1399 Phone 585-202-8754

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Left: Channen MAKING Quinn and Alicia Kibitlewski. THE Below: A group of partiers enjoy the the Holiday Gayla at the Museum and Science Center.

Holiday Gayia proceeds go to

HOUOAY DROf>-m AT THE GAGV Members, staff and friends enjoyed a holiday drop-in at the Community Center on Dec. RY THgRESE FELLER organization as a recipient of this won­ 12. (Center: Toby Greenfreld, Youth Services Director. ) The 2003 Holiday Gayla was held on derful gift." TfSETRtMMING Todd Plank concentrates on trimming the tree in the Nopper Room of the Gay Alliance Dec. 6 at the Rochester Museum and PFLAG hopes that this donation will Community Center. Science Center and was sponsored by The help them in updating literature and Lambda Network at Kodak, GLOB&L purchasing new videos and books for Gay Alliance hosts iidkiay drop-in on Dec. 12 their library and also help with adver­ at Bausch & Lomb and OUTWest at Over 50 guests attended the Gay dangling snowflakes, a Hanukah meno- tising costs in getting word out that Thomson West. Alliances holiday drop-in on the eve­ rah, and, of course, a Christmas tree The proceeds of this event, which PFLAG is still active in Rochester. The ning of Dec. 16. The GAGV staff was (another big thank you goes out to Dan totaled $ 1000, were donated to the local PFLAG Rochester website address is on hand ro meet and greet visitors as Myers for responding to Todd's plea for chapter of Parents, Families & Friends www.ggw.org/pflag. they arrived. donations of holiday decorations... your of Gays & Lesbians (PFLAG) here in Santa (a.k.a. Community Educarion generosity was truly overwhelming!) Rochester. The Holiday Gayla planning Outreach Coordinator Todd Plank) The candlelight reception (over 40 team met with two PFLAG representa­ and his elves (hugs and kisses to the tea lights were scattered about the com­ tives recently to present the $ 1000 check Silksational Charlie Lytle and Christmas munity center to illuminate the room) GIRL TALK: to their organization. angel Keith Eichel for contributing their was an elegant affair, with a delightful On Dec. 27, Donna Rose, author of the book "Wrapped in Blue," about her experiences "In the 15 years that I have been talent and time) were busily working spread of cheese and crackers, Christmas as a transsexual woman, visited the Rochester Transgender Group meeting at the Gay involved with the Rochester PFLAG right up until the last minute to com­ cookies, eggnog and Starbucks coffee Alliance Community Center. Donna, on the left, chats with Mel and Michelle of the RTG. chapter, we have never received a gift of plete the transformation of the GAGV s (a special thank you to the 12 Corners this magnitude," said Adrienne Kllc, co- community center into a winter won­ Starbucks for donating the coffee for chair of PFLAG Rochester, "We are very derland. our event). delighted and grateful that the Holiday The community center was festively While the guests mingled and enjoyed I. Gayla planning team considered our decorated from floor to ceiling and wall- the holiday goodies, Anne Murray and to-wall with beautiful garlands, wreaths, Whitney Houston softly serenaded the crowd with Christmas music. One GAGV board member was heard to comment that in all her years as a mem­ ber of the GAGV, she had never seen the Community Center look so beautiful. The Gay Alliance is looking forward to hosting another holiday drop-in next year. SCHUMER RECEPTION: Above: Bill Pritchard with a ^est at the reception for Sen. Schumer. Below: Charles Arena Laloe Avenue Reception for Sen. and Chuck Bowen. photos by Don Albrecht Schumer on Dec. 3 Baptist Church raises $10,000 A WELCOMING AND Members of the Rochester lgbt com­ AFFIRMrNG munity held a fundraiser on Dec. 3 to benefit the re-election of Sen. Charles CONGREGATION Schumer, at the East Avenue home of Charles Arena. Over $10,000 was INVITES YOU! raised. City Council member Bill Pritchard, 10:00 AM: one of the organizers, told the Empty SUNDAY MORNING Closet that Sen. Schumer's support for the community is important. "He pro­ WORSHIP SERVICE vided proof of that when he connected himself and the Gay Alliance to explore 11:10 AM: A T]M£ FOR COFFEE & the possibilities of federal funding for FELLOWSHIPS A CHANCE FOR die GAGV." Pritchard said. US TO MEET YOU! . "When asked for his support," 11:20 AM: Pritchard said, "without missing a beat, YOUTH & ADULT CLASSES. the senator pointed to his legislative assistant Joe Hanna and said, *Have the CHILDCARE & SUNDAY SCHOOL Gay Alliance call Joe and he will con­ FOR CHILDREN ARE AVAILABLE. nect Chuck Bowen Mrith the person you should speak to in Washington.* This is a FIRST SUNDAY OF EACH MONTH: perfect example of why hes important to OPEN COMMUNION the Rochester gay commimity; access." Lake Avenue Baptist Church is located Among the hosts for the evening were wttcfe Jones and Ambrose Streets meet Evelyn Bailey, Chuck Bowen, Harry Laice Avenue. aixMit one liair mile nortit Bronson, David Carpenter, Sue Oowell, Of the Kodak Ofilce Buildiilg. Tom Ferraiese, Patrick Glavcy, Hon. Tim Mains, Hon. Bill Pritchahl, Mary : FeraiweloferaMtiQnc«H459-576S McCrank, Duffy Palmer and Mark BUODiNG AOOESSIBIJE t AUDIO i^OOiPl Siwiec. The dessert reception was catered AVABjynLE. by Crfcmc de la Crfcmc. . •^

-* HAVE YOU GOT THE SCOOP? Share rt with the rest of the gay community! The Empty C/oset Is always k>oking for information regarding events and social activities. If you know something, send it to us! Submissions are due by the 15th of each month at: Tfte Empty C/o$et, 179 Atlantfc Ave., Rochester. NY 14607-1255. Or call 244-9030.

FEBRUARY PCTTALK THIS MONTH Columnists Check it out Home/Travel/Style • Misadventures in Boyland: • Miz Tulip offers advfce to • Is there a Florida outside Troy goes way over the rain­ pets about their gays and South Beach and Key West? bow. how to train them. Page Merle Exit explores. PageBIA Page BIO

ASBC to iiost Cabaret Nigiit on Feb. 28 at lira's upstairs iounge

The Atlantic-Beacon Sculpture Committee (ABSC) will be hosdng a "Cabaret Night" fiind-raiser at Taras on Saturday, Feb 28 fi-om 8 p.m. to 10 p.m. in the upstairs lounge. Join ABSC for a fun-filled evening of music featuring the piano tunes of Peter Nickles and three outstanding featured performers, Michael Lee, Don Simonetti, Jr., and Thomas Warfield. Sing-a-longs and audience solos/duets will also add to a great evening of win­ ter merriment. A delicious selection of hot and cold appetizers is included. Advance tickets for $15 vdll be available for sale at Tara's, 153 Liberty Pole Way and through ABSC members beginning heb. 1. If you wish lu urder tickets via e-mail, please contact us at [email protected] for details Only a very limited number of rickets will be available at the door for $20 as this event is expected to sell out quickly. For additional informarion about other j^kt^il^ best feept ABSC events, check out our website at JYz I X30uUt maBy see what your www^BSCI 4607.org. 9V^ Otiur i$am pmaHf ham «w«rfw ^Noe Isohsd ^kct tiie dhin line* when you weieaidd. BVs 1fi^» me too, wiieii I siMfvcd, but now X b^nne a jowl, so I am rr|4m. i»aii}r^tiities a^^ do you at aO ' • haveWiha^rd^?-^ •---^^^ ^' ,••;:.-;;: : •) 1^ '^^tdL bgmaBS and^l!^^!^ ^'^tsatty out jY: Httchcockian is not such a bad jibiMits, tcQuM ttii ^ IQEi^ ib^k his place to be. It goes with your "Rear Window" oontmerit. Or was that «iNM^«atstta% mmiiM^ aii mt^estiiiqg "Back Do6r**? (Laughter) Have you Pi«...! ^^ a yo^ cm opcn- ever dbne a musical before or is this Bmce continued on next page slips past the velvet ropes for an inside streets. In the Life meets teens benefiting MOCHA Project holds Meet & Greet h the Life inleiviews HomnI Dean, look at "the circuit" - the controversial from a Minneapolis program that con­ loob at cinut parties, lesbian raU^ all-night, drug-enhanced gay dance par­ nects homeless lgbt youth with welcom­ on [fib. 3 at Pink Bephant ties. Are these party boys defining the ing lgbt homes. The Men of Color Health Awareness For its February episode. In the Life, the way the rest of America views the lgbt Coming Out in the Developing (MOCHA) Project, Inc. will host a Meet TV newsmagazine of record on gay and community? World; In the Life takes a look at the and Greet with appetizers and cash bar at lesbian America, showcases a fascinat­ Lesbian Rabbis: No longer an oxymo­ acclaimed documentary "Dangerous The Pink Elephant, 581 E. Main St., on ing interview with presidenrial candidate ron, lesbian rabbis are sparking a revo­ Living," which explores struggles and Feb. 3, from 7 to 10 p.m. Howard Dean, a special report on circuit lution in modern Judaism. ITL reveals triumphs of lgbt people in non-western The event will be an opportunity parties, and a powerful profile of lesbian how a "queer sensibility" is helping to cultures from Egypt to Thailand. to get to know the MOCHA staff: rabbis. The show will air here on Feb. 22 reshape not just Judaism, but contempo­ For more information, visit In the Executive Director John Morgan, new at 11 p.m. on WXXI. rary American religion. Life's online pressroom at: http'7/www. Program Director Kraig Pannell, new Hosted by acclaimed slam poet and Ag^ng v^dth AIDS: Diagnosed with inthelifetv.or^press/. Community Liaison Michael Booth, Def Poetry Jam star Staceyann Chin, the HFV thirteen years ago, Bert, now 56, is Client Service Navigator Cheryl Rivers, February episode of In the Life features one of a generation of people living with Howard Dean and Peer Educator/Receptionist Fatima is interviewed the following sc^;ments: HIV/AIDS who were preparing them­ S. Woods. For more information about selves for death, but thanks to modern on In the Life "Howard Dean Up Close": In the lor February, MOCHA, call 585-420-1400 or see L^ kicks off its Campaign 2004 series medicine are now entering "an unex­ aired here www.mochaprojecLorg. wiili a candid interview with Democxatic pected age.** ITL explores the reality of Feb. 22. fiontrunner Howard Dean. Having made growing old with AIDS. [history by signing the nation's first civil Homeless Queer Youth: Lesbian, gay, GAGV Sweetheart Bal is Feb. 14! See fuoions law, the former Vermont governor bisexual and transgendered (Igbt) youth an on HHHI COW U mn iisiiMiiei on what a Dean presidency would are 10 dmes more likely to be kicked out page A9. Don't miss diis! for g^ and lesbian Americans. of their homes and wind up in foster care. Cifciiit Parties Uncovered: In the Ufr Many of them ulrimately end up on the THE EMPTY CLOSET w w vv. g a y a 1 j I ;i n c p o r Knzy Qutt Cabmit in NYC ID rain Bruce you know in your life or from your Yoa literally see this after the 55- continued fivm previous page I'm glad I didn't shave myself at continued from previous page childhood? second costume change where she money hrVimiioiit Faerie Camp home or I might have killed myself BV: A whole bunch of people. My is tran^rmed Ibr the first time. "Kiss My Brass" tour ^Midler wiU per­ your first one? On Feb. 28, at 8 p.m. at the Lesbian, Gay, after I saw what was underneath. mother most certainly. She was around She just keeps building on that. Just form at the HBSC Arena in Buffalo on BV: Ahhhh, as an adult. I was a Bisexual and Transgender Community (Laughter) in 1962, we weren't in Baltimore, we keeps getting bigger (laughter). March 9) I will be goii^ out on child actor. I was never a child star Center in N.Y.C, The New York Circle JY: Who are the comedians that you lived in New Jersey and she wasn't Mondb,ys (when Hairspray is closed) to or I would be probably being doing JY: Was that fun for you? The 55- of the Radical Faeries will present a wild enjoy? taking in laundry. Ah, she was one of second costume change? where she is appearing. This is the first rehab. and wacky evening of Faerie entertain­ BV: Well, the ones that I have those women of that period. She had BV: Oh yeah, yeah, it*s live theatre, major tour she has done that I have JY: (Laughter.) That would be fiin.... ment, performance and hoopla to benefit written Ibr, like Bette, Whoopi, Billy big hair and she wore gloves and pearls it's teamwork. not been on. The last tour I was in and an interview at Betty Ford. Faerie Camp Destiny, a Radical Faerie Crystal, Robin, Nathan Lane. I mean when she went out marketing, grocery JY: How long are you going to be out because of "Hollywood Squares". BV: Yeah! I can't talk, I have to Sanctuary in Grafton, Vermont. they are all hilarious. 1 think George shopping. So there is that wiiole sort doing this show? I was taping a lot, so on weekends so make my bed, take out the garbage, Special guests include John Cameron Carlin is just a genius. of mind set that I understand. BV: Through September 2004. I would fly back and fi>rth. But this take a piss and perform a moral inven­ Mitchell of "Hedwig and the Angry JY: You wrote for George too? Ummm, a lot of other people. That^s my contract and then we will one I will only be able to be theie fiir tory. Inch" fame, Lavinia Co-op of BlooUps, BV: Yeah, I did, I wrote fi>r George Divine was certainly an inspiration. see virhat happens. Depending on a few dates because of the Hairspray But I acted a lot when I was a kid. I Scotty-the-Blue-Bunny, downtown poet years ago* Obviously the people I She (Edna) is such a larger than life \«^ere we go, I could do it for a schedtde. So I am doing it all "fiom a ^ras in a million productions and I did Brandon Ohlson, and Robbie LaFosse work with are really, really fiinny. I character. At the same time she is not while. I mean this is the Cold Cities distance**. musicals as an adult, but just for very from the New York City Ballet. The mean Betters body language is just a performer, she says she is a simple and Cold Weather Tour. I looked at JY: Isn't that exciting to be in this big limited runs. Nothing, nothing on Faeries say, "Come to support this inclu­ hilarious. Watching her move is just housewife of an indeterminate girth. the schedule and said, where Is Ft. show and running around the country? this scale, no. I concentrated on other sive non-profit Radical Faerie Sanctuary one of the fiinniest things. Just the And in the course of the show she has Lauderdale? I am very excited for you and hope this aspects of performance. This really is at a darn good kooky evening of song, way she does things. That's her genius an extreme makeover and becomes JY: Who booked this show anyway? leads to many new projects. a first, and yet I feel as if I have been dance, performance, and audience partic­ and she is intrinsically fiinny. doing it all my life. Because I have glamorous as her inner self explodes. BV: Exactly, what Eskimo came up ipation. Door prizes, handmade quilt raf­ BV: Yes!! The joy of this all is reaUy having a second act. I m«*a« T K^w* K<»*»ti JY: I am sure you are very intuitive. I been doing musicals from the time I Ummm, there are quite a lot of big "with this Minneapolis in February? fle, refreshments, drumming and dancing was a child so I have gotten into that mouth, big boned women that I have (laughter) and more" Event tickets are $20 for show, habit at least. drawn from. JY: Chicago's my stomping grounds. qr $25 for show and quilt raffle ticket. JY: That's a lot of the show, a lot of A fun city. Have you been there? sudden having this ^ second act, I've k^n writing for j<7Connect with peo- JY: ^-Tiat I liked (and I got to see the ^gina Monologues mns Feb. 12-14 performance twice) from my perspec­ the women finding their voice. Your BV: Oh yeah! I lived there for five kinda peHbrming long and havi^0m performing Pj^ ^^^" ^^^ ^^^^ tive of being in the audience, were your role, you really come full circle from the years. I have fiiends there. We are For the third year in a row, Nazareth beginning of the show to the end. going to be there with the show for ™ h^^ *JSS '^'^'' '^'"^ ^d^^how often does \^^,^ yc^r'^^Srin^ expressions. I love how animated you are College is helping stop violence against does that happen ^^^^ happen at this Stage in a girl's well ot is that just on on stage. Great looks. It was a lot of fun BV: It*s literal though. She has very two months. I'll have a chance to do women and girls by presenting a benefit at this stage of a " " auto pilot? Like, you to watch you add those in and they var­ little self esteem, she is agoraphobic lots of things. But these kinda two production of Eve Ensler's The Vagina Iter girl's life? get intuitive insights ied from performance to performance. and will not go out of the house. weekend runs in cold spots are not so Monologues. JY: It's all about timing isn't it? into someone you are Was the character Edna, is this some­ She is a mess! She has this incredible much fim, but we will see what the Directed by Beth Lajoie, the play is transformation as the show goes on. future holds. BV: Oh yeah! going to be working with, and how does body you are pulling from? Anybody being performed Feb. 12 at 8 p.m., Feb. your writing start to change? JY: Well speaking of Edna, is size JY: Did you change your role much 13 at 9 p.m., and Feb. 14 at 8 p.m. in BV: I listen to them. At this point really important? Does size matter? from Harvey Fierstein's portrayal? room A-13 of the Nazareth College Arts of my life I write for those people that BV: (Chuckling). In what context, BV: Well, it's essentially the same Center. Tickets are $10 for adults and $5 have established themselves and they African American ancestors return for my dear? part. A lot of stuff that Harvey does students; audience members bringing a have a stage persona and you can write JY: 1 guess you could just about take and that Harvey came up with for Black History Month "Walk the Walk" canned good to the performance receive to that. When they don't have one you that anywhere. himself in the show is because he is a a dollar off on admission. have to help them create a character. A BV: I bet you could... (laughter) brilliant writer and he is unique. He For more information and to reserve playwright comes up with characters Douglass and others bring to life the trag­ JY: Anyway, how did you first meet has that incredible voice and I can't do tickets, call the Nazareth College Arts and writes them and these people sup­ edies and triumphs of Rochester's rich Bette Midler? Where did you guys {mimicking Harvey's voice) "Tracy, Tracy, Center Box Office at (585) 389-2170. ply you with the characters and you African-American past. meet? blah blah blah." He can do more with (For RIT info, see Calendar.) have to just continue to give them fiiel Multiple generations are also repre­ BV: We met in Chicago. We met at that little voice, that little thing, he can The Vagina Monologues is presented in to make those characters come to life. sented. George Brown will greet the audi­ a club called Lucella's. She Mras on a tum any line into an opera. cooperation with V-Day, a global move­ So it's difficult when they don't ence the day before his 90th birthday, and vacation, she was on Broad^ray and I I don't have that facility, so ^ve proudly recount his escapades as a veteran ment aimed at eradicating all kinds of Kave one, and yov» start »ip and you was writing for the Chicago Tribune had to find other things to do, so ^ve just discover one, and it is quite joy­ of the Civil War — in both the Confederate violence against females, including rape, and I was covering music and night­ I rewrote certain things that would land ous when you discover who they are and Federal armies. An orphan from Mother battery, incest, genital mutilation, and clubs and things Uke that. A fiiend of in my voice range that weren't quite when they are on stage in the begin­ Dorsey's Home will give voice to the young­ sexual slavery. mine was managing her and got her Harvey. So we will see what happens. I ning. That is a long and painfiil pro­ er generation, looking forward to going out "V-Day is an experience for anyone, Above top: Bruce Vilanch with Charlie Lytle and "Bahama Breeze," one of the Hairspray this gig in Chicago opening for Mort guess as Hairspray gro^rs it will kinda cess, and at this point in my life I have on their own and sharing what they have male or female," said Lajoie, a Brighton Heads raffled off at the Gay Alliance cast party on Nov. 18 at the Strong Todd mansion. Sahl, no, not Mort Sahl, it was Jackie be organic depending on who plays not met anybody that I have wanted learned from Mother and Father Dorsey. resident belonging to Nazareth's Theatre Bottom: Bruce has a photo op with Cookie Krisp (left) and Pandora Boxx. Vernon, she later opened for Mort the part and which version they will to go through that with. I have started PHOTOS BY DON ALBRECHT. Presented in the historic Hochstein Arts faculty. "We can all learn from the Sahl. He asked if I would go and do. Things they are doing on the road to do it myself. I have my own pain School of Music Performance Hall, Walk the words of the monologues and the some­ review her and if I liked her, inter­ they are incorporating in the New York thank you. JY: Chicago is a great theatre town! there? Walk: Encounters with Rochester's African- times heart-wrenching experiences these Captain Sunfish view her, because there was not much show and the writers keep going back JY: Well, 1 think you are just going to BV: I hope it will work out well. We BV: You know I did! American Ancestors, is offered to the public stories tell us." press. So I went and thought she was to the show and finding things they do your own show, man. will be there for quite a while. JY: I did too! FREE of charge. This moving performance Nazareth is one of five local institu­ Rochester's remarkable African-American terrific and we had a great time and want to mess with and change. So it BV; Yeah, I did it before, I mean JY: Did you enjoy Rochester? BV: It's one of those places. But begins at 12:15 p.m. Hochstein is located tions presenting a student production of ancestors return to the city they made she called me the next day and she gets cast in stone afier a lot of experi­ given the opportunity to go out and BV: Yeah, it was fim. The audiences you know I have a feeling, like the at 50 N. Plymouth Ave. The Vagina Monologues. Others doing so home to entrance a lunchtime audience said, that was a very fiinny interview, mentation. perform for people who wotdd pay were spectacular. Thanksgiving week first time I went there, I felt like I Additional performances are avail­ are the University of Rochester, Rochester during Walk the Walk, the Landmark Society you really should write more. And JY: Is your wardrobe pretty much set? money, and, uh, I got to tell a lot of is always tough on the road in any knew where I was going. And I feel able for school children on the morn­ Institute of Technology, St. John Fisher of Western New York's annual tribute to I said, you are very fiinny on stage, BV: Oh yeah, the designs are all the stories. I had been doing four or five place but New York. It was about a like I am at home here. It's odd. And ings of Feb. 5, 6, and 10. To schedule a College, and Monroe Community Black History Month. On Thursday, Feb. you should speak more. And that was same as Harvey is wearing. Because the stage personalities. I would like to go half house. I mean Rochester itself is then I thought thiait it's kind of like a school group, call or e-mail Cindy Boyer at College. Ninety percent of the Nazareth 5, businessman Austin Steward, frontiers­ the beginning and it just grew fiom show is just hilarious and it is just too back and explore that. But it really is not that big a town for a two-week lot of people feel that way. But there [email protected]. production benefits SafeJourney, a man Captain Sunfish, abolitionist Frederick there. fim to be doing the same piece every engagement and a theatre of that size, are some things in the past that you national organization serving local vic­ good to be messed with. Now I am a JY: Are you still friends? night and discovering the depth in it. a 2,100'seat theatre, it is a lot of seats connect with and perhaps that's why, tims of abuse, while 10 percent goes blond and it is a redhead in Harvey's BV: Oh yeah! In fact she is launch­ version. Ahh, in her last ensemble she to fill. and in a past life you were there. ing a tour Dec. 10 in Chicago, the toward relief efforts in Juarez, Mexico, I don't know. Everybody you meet where hundreds oi migrant women have is completely in flame and I am more \ that had a past life was Cleopatra. Bruce continued on next page of a big platinum blond because I am been kidnapped, raped, and murdered in It's just so boring. I mean there are the last decade. a blonde as I gp through the evening. I '7 know (Arnold) and Ive worked am blonder to start with. millions and millions of Cleopatras. As a movement, V-Day falls on How about the girl that cleaned out ^ Gay owned and operatic or around Valentines Day. (The "V" JY: Well you know that blondes have Wiide-WooH Society more fiin! Cleopatra's chamber pot? I mean you ©RBECE RIDGE CENTER stands for victory, Valentine, or vagina.) with him a U good guy, but never meet her. I mean nb~one vrill holds open mic, It primarily promotes events that increase BV: Oh Baby!! / 585-339-9957 JY: When you had your beard shaved ff ever claim to have had that life. Who Valentine's Day party awareness, raise money, and revitalize the vrere you before? I was a slave. /Www.ctsimagecreations.coiii spirit of existing anti-violence organiza­ off on the Regis and Kelly Live show, was Fm leery o^ nn... JY: It takes courage to claim those order securely on line tions. In 2003, nearly 1,000 V-Day ben­ that fun, did you have a good time with The Wilde/ Woolf Society, Rochester's past lives. efit events were presented by volunteer that? Did they set it up ahead of time? lgbt writers support group and open Especially when doing it on the road, BV: There is also the theory that activists around the world, educating BV: They set that ap ahead of time. JY: What are you reading right now? i I love You mic, will meet at 7 p.m. at Writers & when yon have new theaters and new the lower the soul the less likely it millions in the process. I didn't k^ow that tliey were goii^ BV: I am so eclectic I have a soft Books, 740 University Ave., on Feb. 14, audiences and new towns and (voice is to continue into another life. The V-Day is also a non-profit corpora­ to bring in "Sol the Speed Barber". spot for thrillers and show business for a Valentines Day party and open mic drops) new critics. only ones that keep reoccurring are tion that distributes fiinds to grassroots, Who sliced me open and I still have biographies. At the moment I am read­ Specializing Photo reading. JY: Rochester's critics treated you the higjher souls, the ones who are national, and international organizations the scars. It actually made for a very ing a new novel, by a writer named in Photo All arc welcome to read from original OK! more enli^tened. And that's why the Mouse Pads and programs that work to stop violence lasciiiatiiig moming. I looked very Robert Harris, called "Pompeii". work in genre, and/ or be a listener. For BV: Yeah, the review here vras abso­ more historical figures that we know TeeSliirts felt posters against women and girls. In its first mgged bleeding all over Kelly, which Sort of a thriller set in the days of more information, email Pat Schwartz, lutely spcctftcniat; I suspect that the about seem to keep coining back and year of incorporation (2001), V-Day was was a thrilL I didift iueiw I was deed­ when Vesuvius erupted. He is a ter­ Sweatshirts BalloorKA^iams Calenders co-facilitator, at [email protected]. fiurtlMer I get fiooi NewYbtk the easier that they vrere enlightened in their named one of Worth Magazines "100 ing until I looked over at her and rific writer. He v?tote a book tided Hats For All Occasions :.'*:> Dennis Rosenbaum is the other co- it will be in that legud. They won'k own fl^e. I don^ know if that's just me Keychains Best Charities." In its first six years, the she looked at me with such honor "Fatherland" that I love. facilitator. have seen Harvey and they will not or from having dinner vrith Shirley Delivery Avai^ble V-Day movement has raised more than I thongM that Kathy Lee mmt have JY: Have you been there? Pompeii? The gtoup will meet again at Writers have the temptation to oompaie me $20 million. More information about been standing behind me* (Langliver) BV: I have and it's fobulous. Brttce continued on next page & Books on March 10, at 7 p.m. Harvcy» tliey caiA resist. V-Day is available at www.vday.org. It vras just gmt! JY: Ek) you think you had a past life

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Bruce The interview was a success. I brought I have to admit that I have a fondness continued from previous page along some home-baked apple pie which ful. That's how a child will think. Later for the old flick. I mean what gay man we enjoyed while continuing our "oflF doesn't like a movie about a hot pair of MacLaine and listening to everything the record" chat. What a talented and on I drank. Another mistaken quest she said and going yeah you're ri^t, for control. Even today. Little Debbie, hard-to-find shoes? And if I catch it in beautiful man, this Bruce Vilanch. We the right frame of mind (when I'm feel­ or if that is actually the truth. But if have both made a new friend. •! the cheapest sugar fix going, has been a you believe in any of that stuff it prob­ steadfast source of solace for me. There ing especially lonely or my apartment is ably has some sort of relevance. Who are lots of options to managing desperate devoid of chocolate), I have been known knows. More about Bruce feelings: food, sex, shopping, gambling. to shed a tear when Dorothy says her JY: How are the shoes that you have to The list is pretty extensive. They are all good-byes at the end of the movie when wear? Are they uncomfortable? Get Bruce! 75 min. videotape. Available short term fixes. I have yet to know a returning home to Auntie Em. BV: They were at the beginning. at Rundel Library. compidsive gym rat who isn't trying to But during my most recent viewing of Right before I started rehearsals I This very funny tape is basically an compensate for some long-buried hun. The Wizard of Oz, I came to a startling dislocated a knee cap and it has been infometcial for Bruce Vilanch, legend­ Perfectionism, too, is a false resolution. conclusion. I realized that all the men I ary Hollywood comedy writer, with a have dated in the past can be slotted into slowly healing and it just takes longer • •; i My therapist's son plays basketball. He to heal 'cause I keep putting it into glimpse or three of Bruce the performer says, "You miss 100 percent of the shots simple categories based upon the four pumps. I keep ii wrapped so that it (currently running amok in the Midwest you don't take". (I pay for this advice!) major male Oz characters: the Scarecrow, does not go crazy on me. I guess it in Hairspray). Taking your shot, going to bat, getting the Tm Man, the Cowardly Lion, and is taking longer but I guess this is We see Bruce at home at the Villa La up and trying again, is what it's all about. the Wizard. I was amazed how many something that women go through, Vilanch, popping out of bed, getting hit recendy. He's going through a devas­ The point of anything, even tragedy, is prior men in my life fit so neady into women who wear heels. It's really fine by an avalanche of part of his huge col­ Growing Up tating loss, the death of his partner. I that it gets you to the next place in life. these fairytale roles. welcomed the chance to chat, however and healing great, but there is nothing lection of fiinny t-shirts, and skipping Times may be hard, but I have to remind The men who fell into the Scarecrow briefly, as the Russian ^migr^ women you can do when you have to put it endearingly through his garden. myself that they are never too hard. category had a lot going for themselves. shoved past us in the supermarket. I into high heels every night and twice We see him talking, rifFing and kid­ BY ERIC BELLMAN Here and now is where 1 want to be. They tended to be pretty boys who were have a strong interest in how people a day on the weekends. It's just one of ding around with some of the people he LaSharon was a gift. She knew I liked her. loyal to a fault. Like the Scarecrow, all of cope with loss. Maybe that's a bit like those things. writes for, and it's no coincidence that We had in common being survivors, and them were amazing dancers. And in bed, About tragedy my staring into the mirror; wanting to JY: So the same schedule continues? they are among the most intelligent and each of us knew that being a survivor was these gents were able to bend and stretch learn about those defining experiences BV: Yeah, everywhere we go it's creative people in Hollywood. not the endgame; it's just the beginning. into all types of positions as if they were everyone has, which, sadly, some endure pretty much the same thing. That's Bette Midler (their long, close friend­ I cried a lot during adolescence. I had My therapist is a gift. He's enabled me stuffed with straw. Scarecrows are very in isolation. what a road schedule is like. It is a ship has obviously been crucial for both of no idea how to deal with being queer. to find self acceptance and compassion flexible and make hot lovers. hard time getting people off the streets them), Lily Tomlin, Billy Crystal, Robin I didn't have any friends. The church He confided he wasn't big on the for the child and the choices that a child But alas. Scarecrows do lack brains. on a Wednesday afiemoon to see a Williams, Whoopi Goldberg, Nathan we went to was stringent. My home life therapy. Well, as it happens, I can't made. A chance encounter with an old These guys are fun to fool around with, imagine not having a therapist as part show. 'Cause there is no real tradition Lane and others talk affectionately about was profoundly unhappy. Plus I had acquaintance in the supermarket is a gift. but don't try to hold a conversation with of my support system (along with a hair of that on the road. It really only exists Bruce and the wit that has played a part wretched acne. Life was no ftm at all. I It may not even be an accident. But this them that doesn't revolve around food or colorist, dermatologist, car mechanic, in New York and a couple of other cit­ in building their own careers. Bruce hid in books and movies. is beyond my understanding. The crux of shopping or their fitness regime. These massage therapist and a squad of dental ies. In San Francisco and Chicago we in turn comments on them; of Robin When I cried, I would look at my face the matter, for me, is not to try to under­ boys do enjoy reading books written by a professionals. At some point, a point I are doing a few. I think partially there Williams he says, "You don't write for in the large beveled glass mirror in my stand why things happen. The key is to very famous doctor — Dr. Seuss that is. am definitely at, it's all about mainte­ is actually walk up business in those Robin, you write AT him. You throw the bedroom. Movie actresses like Audrey respond and be grateful for everything, I'm not saying that I'm some Einstein, nance.) My therapist who provides me cities. There is a more of a theater tra­ material into the cage." (Robin makes Hepburn cried and their faces always even the pain. Especially the pain. but occasionally I like to hear sentences with good insights. I'd gone through a dition and an audience that actually caged-animal growls.) remained lovely. My face twisted into an I wanted to grab my friend in the that use words with more than one syl­ difficult stretch: a romance that hadn't goes to shows in the mid-day in larger (So when is Bruce going to start writ­ ugly grimace. I failed to look beautiftil supermarket and tell him how lucky he lable in them. Scarecrows are the Jessica endured. The pain of rejection activated cities. ing movies or sitcoms for himself? When in my sorrow. was to have found true love. I can mis­ Simpsons of the gay male world. (How long suppressed feelings related to child­ JY: Do you have any questions for can we expect "I Love Brucie?") Today I gave another take on what handle the knowledge I've gained over do you like that hip MTV reference?) hood abandonment. We could work me? We see Bruce at work on projects was up with me back then: I wanted to hours of talk and tears. If I had become Then there are the guys who resemble Please Join Us see evidence of feelings. I was plagued, on both issues simultaneously. Hard, the Tm Man. They appear stoic and BV: Yeah! No, not leally, just that I ranging from the Oscars to AIDS orga­ a therapist, no doubt I'd be the therapist nization benefits to a gala at the Clinton quite unaw^ares, by doubts about the worthwhile work. He calmed me by from helll The one -who tcUs you stuff brave to the outside world. These men like you! usviaWy V\ave very secvire \oV»s. av\Robin Williams, who LaSharon died. She was in no way experience, proud of having lived. That's JY: Oh, 1 have just one more question Publicity, Ticket Sales to Special Events, Development prelude to the next one. I woiddn't be crushing his heart, and he hasn't dared notes, "He cracks my cheeks, and you done with life. LaSharon was 47, and what LaSharon's advice meant, I think. for you. What about your new Governor? doing OK today ifl hadn't gone through to ever grow a new one. A Tin Man will can take that any way you want." to Theater Operations, among others. \%it our website for as long as I had known her she had A Buddhist sage advised, "Lean into Do you think Arnold is going to be able whatever yesterday. Now I know: be keep you at arm's length no matter how We even see Bruce vulnerable and for infonmation on all the volunteer opportunities - had full blown AIDS. She told me so the the pain." That's a tough one. to handle the job? gratefiil for the pain. Parenthetically, I much you fight him. In the end, he'll close to tears, then turning it all into a day we met more than 15 years ago. She [email protected] BV: I know him and I've worked www.imageout.org. want to add that the SOB over whom crush your heart if you let him. joke - a really fiinny one, of course. was a pretty scary woman then, intense, with him and he is a good guy, but I I shed tears is a better man for knowing Cowardly Lions are an unusual bunch. We see Bruce explaining that his com­ angry. I liked her right off. While she am leery of any Republican, because me. They tend to be nervous types but some­ edy is about "what's happening right changed a lot over the years, shc was Misadventures they don't have a good track record on Whether you have a few hours or many you can devote how make you feel at ease. A Cowardly now" — the moment he finds himself in. never less than a vital woman. I hate to The question lingers — why do bad issues that matter to me, and my con­ to the Festival there is a need you can help fill. Lion usually has a great head of hair and And if that moment is a hard one, laugh­ think of her as gone. I refuse to. Once things happen to good people? It's a in Boyland cern politically is that the only way he is a snappy dresser. They like to go out at ter is a way of coping. We hope to see you Monday evening, February 23. she said, "Live every day as if it were your worthwhile puzzle. I know a man who m 1 will be able to get California out of its BY TROY ROBINSON night to stalk their prey, which is often The one thing we don't see about last." Good advice. Not easy to pull off. lost his arm in a car crash. He'd been fiscal crisis is to get bailed out by the small, young, defenseless playthings. It Bruce the writer is exactly how he does I procrastinate. I think 1*11 start the diet driving dead drunk. Later, when other White House and the price of that is is very common for a Cowardly Lion to what he does - pulls the moment togeth­ next week'or at some gathering off in the sober people wotdd recount their narrow just much, much too high. tf he only had a brain, a heart and also be a chicken hawk. er and makes it fiinny. Get Bruce! makes fiiture I'll run itw romance. I continue escapes from accidents, when they'd say JY: California was already punished IVIontlaif Whereas a Tin Man can't love because the whole process seem almost td6 easy. to wait for another "opportunity to" get G6d'sparc3'1chem,'1ic^"aslc, "Docs God courage... by the White House with the last energy he doesn't have a heart, a Lion can't You start to wonder, doesn't this writer things right. love you more than mc?" That would scandal last year. Februarv 23. 2004 "I'll get you, my pretty. And your little love because he is afraid to give up his ever struggle? Isn't making people laugh I^haron came into the fullness of bring them up short. BV: Yeah, that's my practical con­ dog too." freedom. He doesn't want to lose his ter­ the hardest thing in the world? (Maybe, her being through living with her ill­ A rabbi wrote a book about his cern. I mean he got elected because A litde while back I got a chance ritory or his ability to prowl for the next from the filmmaker's point of view, 7:OOi]nri ness. Fm sure she wanted more from life. son's death from premature aging. He people were rabidly unhappy and the best thing. watching a writer at work is the most Preferroil Care Eiltioaiioii Center She talked about adopting a child. She watched his son fade away and there was to watch an airing of the classic movie only way to fix it is to align themselves And unlike the Lion in The Wizard of boring thing in the world.) regretted not having a successfid intimate absohitely nothing he could do about The Wizard of Oz on television. With with the federal government. So... Monroe Siiuare Oz, these boys will attack when feeling relarionship. Lately, when I was thinking it. Prayer and pleading didn't alter fiicts. all its rainbow symbolism and campy JY: You were one of the few people We see Bruce's hands poised over the cornered or vulnerable, especially when 250 IVioiiroe Aueiitie. Rooliesier. NY about her, I reflected that we had a lot in What he concluded was that it isn't so songs, it's no wonder that it's grown to that didn't put yourself on the ticket. computer keyboard as the voice-over you try to pin them down to a commit­ common. Shc was, at times, intimate, at much about what happens to us, as it be quite the gay phenomenon. In fact, BV: Well, I was on the road, but if says, "Now all that remains is to turite (Please use tlie liaoH eiitranee) ted relarionship. They'll take a chunk out times aloof. I'm like that. She was angry, is about how we behave through what whenever Oz is on television, gay men I was there I would have just elbowed the material". But we don't see inside of your heart faster than that tiger took fiinny, vulnerable. Me too. She had a happens. Do we honor our pain or bury all over this city ptdl out their prayer Angeline aside. that quick, acute, mischievous mind as a chunk out of the neck of Las Vegas very solid sense of herself. Ahead of me it? Do we strive for dignity or scatter rug$ (designed exdusively for Target by JY: Or Gary Coleman. You could have the synapses start popping. Real magic magician Roy Horn. A Lion can smell on that score. And shc dressed great, blame? Isaac Mizrahi) and bow in the direction just kneed him aside. (Laughter) remains a mystery. blood, so you can never show fear when much better than I. She liked me a lot As a kid, one response to the chaos of Kansas. (Not to be confused with the BV: The last thing I have to say is -S.J. backing out of a room away from one of and that meant a great deal to me. Fm of my life was an extended period of HBO prison drama Oz when gay men that R^ublicans can't win elecrtions these pussies. angry about her d«ith. In her honor TU kleptomania. I acquired things I felt bow in die direction of the county jail anymore. They can only steal them. Then you've got our Wizards. And just think about her advice more often. I needed. I loved the exdtement, the while praying to find a felon like hottie JY: Touchy, my fiicnd. (Columnists contintted on next page I bumped into an old acquaintance risk. It made me (eel alive. I felt power­ Chris Meloni.) N ^! fvi (> t H THE EMPTY CLOSET www. g a y a . i < c^ r. ^ H --i « ' : A t ," V THE h Nl P • T C L B7

names will be used without permission. the kitchen and all of us would still be so You don't have to be a right-winger or grams: They preach no sex until mar­ Remember, while the risk of woman- their lives without saying a word? Would Columnists to-woman sexual transmission of serious we ever love someone again? Write to [email protected] continued from page B5 deeply in the closet as to be invisible. a conservative Republican to believe it's riage. And at the same rime, Bush is Let's Talk Whenever people, and particularly best for teenagers not to have sex until trying to deny us equal marriage rights. infections such as HIV in generally con­ Tough questions without answers or like the great and powerftil Wizard in the politicians, start yapping about "tradi­ they are more mature and responsible. I'm sure he and his supporters would just sidered to be uncommon, women who guarantees. Tough questions that carry movie, these guys tend to be not so great tional values," it's always a red flag. It's But abstinence-based programs ignore love if wc never had sex! That, of course, have contracted HIV or other infections BY JULIE WEST a lot of pain and regret. And so I won­ and not so powerful. They're all smoke an expression that has come to be code the hard reality that America's kids are is not going to happen. from sexual contact with men or women, r/"^ dered all that and more until.... that and mirrors. At first they appear larger for attacking gay men and lesbians. And having sex sooner, and more frequendy. What docs need to happen, however, or from intravenous drug use, are srill "click". than life with big cars and big houses, but in his State of the Union speech. Bush Our nation's teens — including the gay is that all of us as gay, lesbian, bisexual at risk of transmitting that infection to The Click And on that day, I had the first inkling Wizards always seem to be compensating stayed true to form. and lesbian ones — deserve complete, and transgender people need to work to other women if they participate in risky that it was possible. 1 could say it was her incredible smile, her dark brown eyes for something. These are the guys who Bush never uttered the words "gay" or honest and accurate information on how defeat Bush's re-election campaign. No sexual behaviors. Happy February, ladies, and if it's OK or her long legs that seem to go on for­ claim to be the "well-endowed blonde "lesbian" or "bisexual." He didn't even best to protect themselves from the myr­ more excuses about how Bush is simply / promise that I will practice safe sex with you, I'd like to share something Dean for America ever but it was much more. I know that. jock with a swimmer's build" in the chat use the antiseptic "homosexual." And iad of sexually transmitted diseases out trying to mollify a radical element of his with my partner, that happened to me recently, something There was a warmth, a sense of humor Columnist's Note: Those of you who rooms, but then turn out looking like 1 doubt he knows what "transgender" there, especially the HIV virus. Any party, how he is "tolerant" and "compas­ 5afer sex is anything one does to lower unexpected. . and a vulnerability that she was willing read the online version of the Empty Closet Uncle Fester from the Addams Family. It means. Still, his attack on our commu­ medical expert can tell you that condoms sionate" or, for heaven's sake, that he isn't her risk of getting a sexually transmitted It was what I call a "click". Now mind to show me the edge of. Time will tell may remember a letter to the editor I sub­ isn't unusual for a Wizard to dabble in nity was clear and straightforward. have an exceedingly high success rate at anti-gay at all. infection. It's about having more plea­ you, this is for those of us that have what this person will bring into my life mitted last October. I was convinced then, the modern day magic of plastic surgery, Though Bush has been hedging his stopping the spread of rhe virus. He's taken sides. Now it's time for us sure with less risk. Safer sex also means been single and wondering if there is and just as importantly what I can ofier as I am now. that one of the most important liposuction, or/and hair plugs. Don't get bets on whether or not to support a There's also an ironic catch-22 for protecting your partner, so return the life beyond meeting a woman at Spot to. her. But for now, we have promised each things we can do as gay Americans is to near a Wizard (unless to get your name constitutional amendment that would us glbt people in Bush's abstinence pro­ favor and don't allow your body fluids to and going home to ingest vast quanti­ other honesty, trust and communication. have a voice in the political process. Here in his will). alter the Constitution in order to define get into your partner's body. Also, don't ties of chocolate to bolster the sagging I. couldn't ask for more. are some excerpts of that letter. Here's a little cheat sheet to remember marriage solely as a union between one participate in sexual activities if you have spirits. It's that moment when you meet And so, if you ever doubt that "she" Columnist David Talbot (Saion.com) hit the major characteristics of these Oz man and one woman, his State of the I promise that I will make an appoint­ sores or other symptoms. Make sure someone and you feel that "something" is out there, just wait for the "click" and the nail on the head when he wrote that men: Union speech made it clear he would ment for my annual gyrtecologu:al you get checked for sexually transmitted is there, you're not sure what, but you you'll know. nothing is more gratifying to a movie audi­ Scarecrows: Hot in bed. Dumb in the support his party's core right-wingers on examination. At the annual exam, the infections every year, and get the correct know it draws you to this person in a treatment if you become infected. On the political front; The bad news ence than the moment when a sorely head. this issue. MtaMMkiMlilA clinician will discuss your medical review way that others didn't. And when you - The Ohio senate has approved one of abused protagonist (the American public In Tin Men: Uses a lot of lube for the He called marriage "one of the most with you. Your blood pressure will be I promise that I will follow-up with feel it, you can't help but wonder if this the most far-reaching gay marriage bans this case) finally feels its strength and gives bone. But has a heart of stone. fundamental, enduring institutions of taken, as well as your weight. There my Pap test results to reduce ray risk person could be... just might be, "the" in the nation, A divided senate approved the tormentors what they richly deserve. Lions: Has great hair. But has not feel­ our civilization." That was perhaps the will also be a breast exam check, pelvic of cervical and endometrial cancers. one. It happened to me the other day the bill 18 tol5. The good news- A From "Roci '^ o u f r. • • F n r T t M' Ci :i y <''* L '•- ^^ t> i -"> n (' • 1111; r women would still be barefoot and in THE EMPTY CLOSET w w w, a a V 3 I i i o f ic e o

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r- tBRUARY 2 M;.-! BfO\ THE EMPTY CLOSEl w w VJ. g a y a 11; a :^ c J". o ' 9

cuisine. Billed as "home of Mannys SHARE YOURSCLF... 'Monkey Butt* hot sauce". But don't let KAVOP TTie EC is always looking for your reci­ that scare you if you're not burning for Th KAVOO pes, entertainment ideas, travel tips and a bite. Great atmosphere, too and worth more! Submissions are due by the 1 Sth '» a profascional and of each month at: The Empty Closet, 179 the short trip. oonfidsniial program for people Atlantic Ave.. Rochester. NY 14607-1255. Head on over to Dolphin Landings Skalny Travel Group with aexual addidions Gall 244-9030. Fax 244-8246, or email to: Charter Boat Center for another cruise... and conipulsions [email protected] I love to cruise... sightseeing, sportfish- at Van Zile Travel ing, dolphin watching. This time it was a KAVOD docks. The cottages are fully equipped there is a public bathroom. This one sailboat with a two-hour dolphin tour in 399 Alexander Street the inland waterways. Cute captain! and decorated with individual themes, even had little curtains above the stalls. Rochester. New Yoric 14607 OK guys, I'm not leaving you out of Enjoying the Florida gay spots such as Women In The Arts and Women Amusing thing. Next to the baby chang­ 585S46-«iaO Sports Figures. This would be a great ing station was one of those heavy duty this. I did check out St. Petersburg's solo kavodreoovery.oom place to go with a group of fnends and rain jackets. Now, that's protection! gay resort... not that women aren't wel­ 110% even your pet. We found a restaurant in Gulfport come. The Suncoast Resort has 120 hotel BY MERLE EXIT swimming with the dolphins. On this If you want to cook there is a nearby called Pierhouse Grill & Pepper Co. rooms and suites, an outdoor pool, bars, 169 AtUmtto A>i*nu» Oh, to be out of the cold or "out" in one, they swim with you. You have to (luroimA th» cor«wr ftom 0t* ArXMALK) lounges, shopping and entertainment. 271-6S20 the warmth of Florida. Key West and cheer them on as they jump around fol­ supermarket- Not Uke those in NYC, Steaks, seafood. Florida and Caribbean This is the popular center of gay activity. South Beach aren't the only places xo lowing the boat. Knock against the sides This is not a new resort so don't expect A A/ew Stares I be in order to have a gay old time. I and they'll stay with you. the rooms to look luxurious. (Gay OMtfiedf 6- operated) "JetBlued" to the Gulf Coast passing Continuing on the nature topic, INNS & OUTS I stray to tell you that I did have the through Fort Myers and onto Sanibel we took the 90-minute narrated tram Sanibel Inn, 937 East Gu^f Drive. Tacra«4onjs opportunity to sample the likes of South O w \v ^ Island. tour through the j.N. "Ding" Darling Sanibel. 800-965-7772. www.sanibeiinn. Beach when the ^^Y Sharks played the Let's just label Sanibel In 1 as "gay National Wildlife Refuge. Great foot­ com Let us take the stress ...Ihat you/ COYV oufford/. friendly plus'. There are a few properties paths, winding canoe trails, and a five- Windows On The Water, Sundial Beach Miami Fury... we won. I have a feeling owned by the same company, Meristar mile scenic drive. Lots of native birds, Resort. 1451 Middle Gulf Drive, Sanibel. that you're already familiar with the area. and time out of planning m sTniss HoiixMY sHoppma i Hotels and Resorts, but Linda Logan raccoons, otter, and alligators. C.R.O.W., 239-395-6014. www.sundialresort.com. I stayed at Chesterfield Hotel. Excellent location! Rooms are chic! Bedroom has your vacation. Call us and her companion manage this par­ Care and Rehabilitation of Wildlife, Lee Island Coast CVB, Fort Myers. 800- shop irva/Muarm ocyyy atmoiphere/. its own bathroom in it... no door. A today to book your ticular gorgeous piece. Sanibel Inn has and the Sanibel-Captiva Conservation 237-6444. www.LeelslandCoastcom 96 units that include hotel rooms, suites Foundation should be considered to short wall separates the toilet view from A UWIQUE EKnniE^^ Mermaid Kitchen, 2055 Periwinkle Way, great gay getaway. and two-bedroom accommodations, all enhance the relaxation of "nature" out­ the bed. Otherwise, expect to be with Sanibel. 239-472-1242. www.themermaid- having screened balconies to observe the door attractions. someone you love or who tolerates you. ioew and/reclai/me^Ctem^ kitchen.com. Extra freebees. Safari Bar and restaurant. beauty of it all. May I also recommend Mermaid h(Muif)iched/fiyr yoiAAl Changing Tides, 225 Boca Ciega Dr., Mediterranean cuisine. Delicious food. If this isn't romantic enough, try Kitchen. Eclectic foods, mermaids and Madeira Beach. 727-397-7706. WWW. Really. Time to go home. (5.5,244.8430 a sunset dinner at Windows on the native legends. It's really a hoot. There's Store/ Hotu-j- Water at Sundial Beach, whose resort this large aquarium housing some won­ changingtidescottage.com. So, have you viewed the latest Showtime www.greatgaytraveLcom TtAeiday - Saturday is also one of the properties. The cui­ derful creatures and striking fish. Ask Pierhouse Grill, 5401 Shore Blvd. S., offer, "The L Word"? I enjoyed the first 11:00 O'.m - 6.00 p.m sine is "Gulfshore" and "FlorAsian." about the legends. Gulfport. 727-322-1741. www.piertiouseg- episode. My question is, will Dana get a [email protected] toaster oven? Olivia Cruises recently had Entrees include Duck Noopie, Bronzed Off to St. Petersburg, specifical­ rillandpepperco.com. HoUday ExtetioLed' Houry a trip that included the cast members. 2349 Monroe Avenue Grouper, Mangrove Snapper, Seafood ly Madeira Beach as we check into Suncoast Resort. 3000 34*^ St. S.. St. (Starting' 1219/03) That's OK, but there's one cruise com­ Wed/M'tdayy and/ thundayy Sicily and Barrier Island Beef Changing Tides Cottages, a woman's Petersburg. 727-867-1111. www.suncoas- Rochester, NY 14618 ing up from Boston to Montreal where umtXl 8:00 p.nu "By the sea, by the sea by the beauti­ place owned by Kathy Behrmann: 10 tresort.com. ful sea..." Captive Cruises, Out-Island waterfront cottages, four two-bedroom they'll be celebrating July 4"^ in P'Town Serving the community since 1991 Chesterfield Hotel, 855 Collins Ave., by having kd lang onboard to perform. (no pun intended). Sunset, Shelling and six one-bedroom, where you may Miami. 305-531-5831. www.southbeach- 169 AtiamtSc A^t»wt> Cruises...we opted for the Dolphin and Check it out at Olivia.com. (euvunif tK» conver fromr tiKc AriMALK) see dolphins and manatees frolicking group.com. 2n-€8ZO "WWdWfc A.dventure Cruise. You hear of in the "front yard" and pelicans on the Cmm for Sunday Omner in tlw Rnger Lakes-.

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iPtal Bia land arrows of quietly oiitraged family and When I transltkxiedt people used to I mean, we are not likely to run out of agenda and polrcy that divides us. Bush He does not hrcle ftom his convictions, nor Ifriends. There were also days of being out compltment me on my courage for what I Columnists breeding stock, are we? And do you really divides us by race by instituting quotas does he avoid controversy. God knows how there just out in the natural world, playing was doing. I would deflect that praise by care what I'm doing in my bedroom (unless Continued from p. 7 and attacking a woman's right to make her hard the other democratto hopefuls spin [mostly. answering that rt wasnt really courage, but criticize this orgy of dreadful leadership as own heatth care decisions. Bush divides us the truth alaout Dean's character. Through you are lucky enough to be thereO There were nights too, spent playing sinnply something that had to be done. But "un-American". by sexual orientation by supporting sena­ it all, he still is standing tall. He represents In October's column I wrote my defini­ I with friends and others galiivanting around now that I took back on it four years after A backlash was inevitable as resent­ tors who continually slander and bash gay the voice of millions of people who hold the tion of what a transsexual Is. After some Rochester, k>oking for what was happen­ the fact, I'm changing my mind. ment continues to grow. Enough already. Americans. same values that are essential to improving constructive criticism from some friends ing, and sonf^etimes finding it. I TKw think that transittoning In fact This urgency to change the political Dean seeks an America where It is not the quality of life for every American. of mine, I decided to amend my words of Lately though, as I have progressed does require courage, as do^ racing any direction of America's future has mani­ enough to protect our own rights under But most of all. he does it with hope, wisdom with the caveat that transsexu­ down this transsexual path, and have new challenge for the first time. However, fested itself in the living rooms, coffee the law, but it is a duty and an obligation class, a sense of purpose, and fortified als are bom; we do not devetop into one. accomplished some of my goals, I can feel there are very few challenges that human beings can face that have as far reaching shops, and websites across America. This for each and every one of us to make sure optimism. Elect Howard Dean as your next There are more potential transsexuals than more relaxed and appreciative of life and and life changing consequences as does wave of vibrant energy, that has surfaced everyone is equal under the law. When then President of the United States in 2004. You actual ones. I maintain my opinion that an all that that includes, and maybe just a little transition. in money and volunteerism, has catapulted Gov. Howard Dean signed the first Civil could play a major role in building a new actual, here and present now transsexual less fixated on self. Tnat is a good thing, as Uke flight 100 years ago, transitioning is Ex-Governor Howard Dean to the position Union legislation of its kind, less than half American community. Peace. lives full-time In the gender opposite the they say, and i will write again nest month. something that very few people have done of one of the leading candidates In the race of his constituency supported the bill. one assigned at birth. But who cares about Love, and most can't even comprehend. But for the Democratic nomination. Wearing a bulletproof vest, he traveled definitions anyway? What we really need is Ricki like flight, doing it is incredibly liberating. After 9/11, Democrats seemed to lose the state to promote and confront those more love. Transgem Most of our transgendered friends dress Another llransgender essay It's something you can't truly understand their backbone, opting for bipartisan unity. who threatened him with bodily harm. unless you've done rt. Not Howard Dean. He made his opposition as women to fulfill a deep need, not just for He tried and successfully convinced the This makes it frustrating to try to explain (H 1 U sexual gratification, but to actually move this month known eariy on that the conflict with Iraq people of Vermont that it was simply the transition to the worid at large. You can't their awareness to the realm of femininity so was not justified. Dean has consistently right thing to do. If this testimony of cour­ Flight, Dreams, Journeys tell people what it's like, because it isn't as to experience a spiritual and emotional been telling the American people about the age and integrity isn't an example of presi­ Posing some questions like anything else they know. The very idea stability and a real uplifting of spirit which is RY MICHgLE DENBER lack of character in the White House. He is dential merit, then I'm not quite sure what of changing one's sex, whether from male not available to them as men. forcing all the other candidates to amp up else could be. This month I would like to F>ose questions Rather than dealing with what seems like to female or female to male, boggles the the Bush-bashing to match the party faith­ Moreover, his commitment to the ide­ to my multitude of readers (at least four at Many transgendered people do feel an endless stream of problems afflicting mind. It's not like going to college or get­ fuls' passionate mood. Dean is the initial als of "community" seem very genuine. last count). physical gratification at becoming women transpeople, I thought I'd start the new year ting married or any of the other transitions politician who lit the fire in the people who Integral to this is part of reaffirming the What is the big deal about changing as well. All that said, I have a caution — no with an affirmation and perhaps a celebra­ most people go through, and it's not even previously lost hope, or were disenfran­ shared belief that everyone regardless of genders? And for that matter, what's wrong one does this full time if they don't have to. tion of things trans. like being gay (although you can be both ^.v. >,^^>.. chised for one reason or another. race, sex, creed, sexual orientation, or with having a lover of the same sex? Only a masochist or someone "loony-tunes' This note is being written on the day of trans and gay). Psychotherapy Si Ttierapeutic would go through the heartache and just the 100th anniversary of powered flight. It's especially not about sex. It's atjout I'm supporting DeanforAmerica because immigration status is entitled to equal pro­ About the first question - hey, we aren't Spirlt-Mlnd-Body Work he truly has the most insightful policy tection and justice. This is just not happen­ alone. Several other species do it, too. plain crap we endure to get where we are. It's easy to lose sight of how remark­ who you are at the core. It's about your able this achievement was in today's era solutions to some of America's most per­ ing today. Take a look around. They are supposedly "lower animals", but So in a nutshell, if you don't have to live full deepest Innermost identity as a human of intercontinental jet travel. The Wright plexing problems. He is also the only I'm supporting Howard Dean because what's lower than war, mass murder, self- time, don't; you are probably not a trans­ being and it's about being able to express brothers had a dream and a passion that candidate willing to fight forcefully in plain he wants to rally the worid around funda­ destruction and destruction of our pre­ sexual. And yes, my dears I'm prepared for that identity and receive the validation of Individual, Couple and Family they could accomplish something that had ttinseling & • spoken, mad-as-hell language against the mental principles of decency, responsibility, cious MOTHER EARTH. People really are ever more controversy over these genuine society for it. As flying frees you from the never been done before. Many of the quali­ Sexual Abuse Recovery 6f hcjaling no higher or lower than any other specie of gems of gender generalities. bonds of gravity, transition frees you from • neo-conservative onslaught. He pulls no freedom, and mutual respect. He states ties that led to their success are the same Retreat Center punches when it comes to answering the that our foreign and military policy must life, and we seem to behave most pooriy. I would like to digress as I end this having to live a lie every day of your life Depression that transpeople need If we are to succeed and allows you to be and express who you smug, smarmy, good ol' boy rhetoric of the be about the notion of America leading the Regarding the second question. It's missive to my dear readers. I am writing ClifDnic physical or emotional pain in realizing our own dreams. truly are. current administration. been going on for a long, long time. And this column on a very beautiful, mild late- worid, not America exclusive to the worid. Being "trans", whether it's transgen­ exploration & Development of it's certainly not unheard of In other crea­ November day while sitting at my desk Well that's probably enough of my per­ Some pundits refer to his "tempera­ In a speech to the Council on Foreign dered or transsexual. Is not easy. spintuai gifts ment" and "electability". If any of these Relations on June 25, he stated four spe­ tures. watching the fading sunlight on a day I am sonal Transgender View for now. Trans means crossing over, traveling There's certainly no shortage of topics misanthropes care to personally meet the cific goals. You would think that with overpopula­ very grateful for. I am grateful for this as I try from one place to another. This journey we we can discuss, from what's both good real Howard Dean, they will soon reaWze First, defeat the XhreaiX posed by ter­ tion being what it is, and the real problems to be grateful for all my days, and the days Learn to Fro mote your own Health undertake is as frightening as it is fraught and bad about being trans, who we are and that he Is more than presidential material. rorists, tyrants, and technologies of mass attending to that, a realistic and common I have truly enjoyed for the last few years, with peril. And society doesn't make it any how we're perceived, the problems and the I'm supporting Howard Dean's candida- destruction. sense viewpoint would be — Gayness is days that I spent largely fixed on improv­ Leigh Woodley Ehresman, MS.Ed. easier. It requires an all-consuming com­ rewards. After all trans is about crossing cv ^ot Pres\cier\cv because he has a proven Secondly, strengthen our alliances and Goodness. ing my female self and suffering the slings mitment, a passion to reaching a goal in 315-524-7588 over, and this is one journey that changes I \ra.c\K. record in Vermont, where he was ensure Russia and China are fully inter- order to succeed, and the will to believe you forever. governor for 11 years. Neariy 92 percent grated into a stable international order. that failure is not an option. of all adults in that state have some form Third, enlarge the circle of beneficiaries of health coverage. But more importantly, of the growing worid economy. 99 percent of all children are eligible, and Lastly, ensure that life on our fragile 96 percent have it. There is no reason why planet can be sustained. this country of ours can't use Vermont's Howard Dean believes the worid could model to provide health care for those who be a place where our children could grow OUTIan Stor«o« Systoms* need it most. up In security and peace, not because the • Spsoi ContoMctalions • VTlandish Another reason why DeanforAmerica axis of evil would be absent, but conversely • Q«n«ril R«psirt • Pttimblng • Elsdricai • is my choice is his commitment to ensur­ Isecause the forces of right would be united ing civil rights and justice for ail Americans. and strong. Howard Dean really speaks for THRfF RrNFI»flTI0N5; IM RIMI HlHf? RniTf? rMVIRftMMrWT*; Ttdeos &! gifts The current administration promotes an me. He's listening to every gay American. Where it's IN to be OUT Lea+her for Your Lifes+yle Greeting Cards T-Shirts Pride Jewelry Boolcs We have a large stock of Jackets, Vests, Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church Stickers Magazines Shirts, Pants, chaps, caps, t^elts and Empowering People • Embracing the Journey • Touching the World accessories by Schott NYC, Kookie, Carroll Sunday Moming Worship 11:00 A.M. Shop Rochester's largest library of over 4500 and others in our Leather Department. Sunday Evening Worship 7:00 P.M. QLBT themed Mainstream and Adult Videos and DVDs for rent or sale. at OUTtandish Laafker Jim Mulcahy, Interim Pastoral Leader PLUS We feature Upstate New York's largest seiectioii of 17S Norris Drive Hundreds of new & previewed videos & DVDs top qaaHty Fetlsli aod Kink soppUes. Rochester New York 14610 for sale, pricked from $4.95 - $19.95 Shop In comfort and privacy ft»r: Email: "maittoiOQmcceffrontiefnef.ner • CttslOBi designed, LocaDy cralled Playroom fomkhlngs. 535-271 -8478 • Top qnaUty Hand crafted Floggers by Wian Stodkis <^'T- • Leatlier & Steel Bondage soppUes An OUTlaodish • Hoods, Siiags, Crops, & all types of personal ose items Coupon • Dnngeon CDs by cool composer Butt Boy - Or shop onr catakigi - 1 FREE i Onr firiendly staff Is here to serve yonr needs. TARA RUSSOW, Ph.D. RENTAL : O OOOO CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGIST f^9^ I^SJ^ ^^ifiSf ^CwT ^98^^ VitfeoaOMIsA North OoodnMiii Olieet, bi tfie Wage Gale 120 ABens Creek Road .ItiUMi-tlPM Noon - 5 PM _ AAer-hoiiis Vkieo^DVD Drop is Available Rochester, NY 14618 (585)442-4447 www.RussawCbnsultin9.com

A B14 THE EMPTY CLOSET w w w. g a y a I o « 1. ^ A Pet Talk with TUlip

Miz T.'s outfitt^Two of Hearts" head­ band by Doggolce&Gabbana, red silk scarf by Doggone Karan,. Fragrance (Bitch in Heat) by PETA. The BY MIZ TULIP (AS TOLD TO TODD PLANK) Hello my lovelies. It's your favorite canine confidante. Miss Tulip, United Way here. As the ED (Elegant Dog) of the GAGV (Gay Animals Gaynlng Visibility), I've decided it's high time that Rochester igbt pets be given a forum (don't be confused by the association with the gay bar down the street from the GAGV... that's a subject for a future column) for addressing our issues and concerns. For too long, Igbt pets (or Animal Companions to use the politically correct term) have Campaign is been relegated to the shadows, kept in the basement (or garage), been left out in the cold, been denied adequate snacks, and remained silent. It is time for us to speak out, demand our rights, and be proud of who and what we are! Through my column, I seek to increase the visibility of Igbt pets everywhere. Each month I will seek to address a topic of concern to the animal queerdom. It is my intention Coming! Ever find a dollar in your pocket? if you're eligible for an Earned income Tax to be inclusive of all my feathered, furry and amphibious friends, and I invite all of you to Credit, we might be able to help you find $2,000. write into me with your questions, as well as offering your suggestions for future articles. The average amount of money recovered by C AS.H. clients is $2,000. So you may have serious money coming to you if you vrarfced full or part time in 2003 and had a 2003 income less than... Some of the subjects that I intend to cover this year include how to come out to straight • $12,230 for childless workers between the ages of 25 and 65 pet owners, where to go to meet other Igbt pets, what to do about anti-gay bias towards • $30,666 for families with 1 qualifying child • $34,692 for families with 2 or more qualifying children animals, and who to support in our fight for equality. I have enlisted the aid of a local vet­ How can I C.A.S.H. In? erinarian, who will provide authoritative answers to your questions about proper nutrition, Just file a tax return. You can file your tax return for FREE at various sites around the city. Call health, and fitness for Igbt pets and their owners. the C.A.S.H. hotline at 242-6485 to learn more. Exercise Also, being the hip chick that I am, I'll be featured in a fashion spread each month, displaying the latest in cature, grooming products (I refuse to use any pet care products ^^ tested on our human friends.) and home decor. There are plans to visit some of the local C.A.S.H. AOCOUNCl. establishments and let you know how "family friendly" they really are. C(«

"Civil Disobedients" (A Birdbun Thcutre Tale) - Part i of lo Tinuuj.birdbun.com

Y<R fCAOA ViG. WAS TfeRRECT; AS ALWAVS ^TH€ scazev IS A PMC vusn^kS or Remember: CArZRaVS... piP Vou TCV We Receive no United Way Funds Unless Designated

GayAlliance of the Genesee Valley 179 Atlantic Ave. Rochester, NY 14607-1255

585.244.8640 office 585.224.8246 fax [email protected] iSi-@l |B16 THE EMPTY CLOSET w w w. g a y a 111 a n c e . o 1 V <) I] itifx^ e or T^ H fc fc M P T V ... L O b t Gay A 11 i uuce of the Genesee Valley... 31 years NEWS UPDATE AN UPSTATE REPORT Gay Groups Upstate Reports • Atlantic Beacon Sculpture Committee • News from Buffalo's Gay and Lesbian hosts a Cabaret Night Feb. 28 at Tara. Archive. PageCA Page C3 GAGV hosts families

BY TQPn PLAMiC Over two dozen families (attendance was upwards of 50 people) turned out" for the kick-cfF meeting for Pride and Joy families on Jan. 17. The Community Center was rear­ ranged to create a kid-friendly area for the children to play and a section for the adults to sit and talk. The youngsters were encouraged to draw pictures of their families to be hung up on a clothes­ line so that everyone could see. While parents and children munched on pizza and wings, Claudia Stallman, Project Director of the Lesbian and Gay Families Building Project (LGFBP), and her co-worker, Project Outreach Educator Karen Armstrong, discussed the Pride and Joy Families groups that What more could yo H have been successfully organized in Binghamton and Elmira. Thanks to id. additional grant money awarded to the

Families continued on next page Meet IOOO*s of Great people right from your phone! Paul Berezney Susan Jbitian Youth Group update: Quiche Masters returns Feb. 21 -22 Live Wire is Fast, Fun an 100% FREE to new callers for the first five days! Empowerment at to train presenters for GAGV Common Threads The Gay Alliance will be hosting another professional speakers' training, called Quiche RY TORY CSREFNFIFI H Masters (formerly known as the GAGV Speakers Bureau) on Feb. 21 and 22. Grceting&i from Youth Ciroup L^nd Nationally rei\o>Afne«l pviViWc spcaVcer av\«\ V'gVn; activ^Vst I'^c.rvrva \^e<\ '^Jy/Xn^ >jvV\\ V»o Then if you choose to become a member we offer a We have had a jRin, busy and success- returning to Rochester to deliver the training. Saturday (9 a.m -4 p.m., with lunch ail past two months - from our big included) will be dedicated to new volunteers and individuals who were a part of the Holiday Youth Dance, to earning some Gay Alliance's former Speakers Bureau and would like to resume their activity/role as 30 Day Membership for only $30! donations demonstrating our fabulous GAGV presenters. Sunday (9 a.m. to noon) the GAGV will be inviting members of the first Quiche •;.g^: .11 ....jiii. wrapping skills at Borders Books, to That's only $1 a Day! being the very grateful recipients of Masters training to attend, as we will be introducing a new, user-friendly template for the donations from Rainbow Theater presenters to begin using in 2004. On Sunday morning, rhe Gay Alliance will also be Group's performances at Nasty D's the providing an overview of new modules that are currently being developed to meet the Why Pay $2.99 a minute, $3.99 a minute or even more? last two weekends in January. many requests for information and training that we have been receiving from educa­ We were also lucky enough to have tional and human service organizations in the greater Rochester area. them come to the GAGV and perform If you are not currently a member of the GAGV Speakers Bureau, and would Give us a try and... specifically for the Youth Group on Jan. like to volunteer some of your time and talent as a speaker in support of the GAGV 25- They were absolutely wonderful! If Community Education Project, you can apply to attend the weekend (day-and-a- half) training. Call the Gay Alliance at (585)244-8640 ext. 24 for more details. W Lef Us Puf You In Touch! Youth Group Continued on next page Inside Harvey Milk: two students speak up ' $^]innm wnKnumwwanna%m BY ALITA SCHRATWEISER Tolerance policies on harassment based on sexual and/or gender identity. But Deep in the heart of New York City sits those who have faced harassment have a a building on a corner. Inside this build­ different view, well aware that the many ing, a little over 100 students are now of the schools give no help in aiding a l-c'-i k' I C- ^ *T. . attending school. The school's name is ...•>*%'.' student against discrimination. Harvey Milk High School and it attends C585) JaLnine Weekes and Daron Davis, in his senior year, and he needed a place specifically to the needs of Gay, Lesbian, both students at Harvey Milk High to fully discover his sexual orientation. Bisexual, and Tiansgender students. School, were kind enough to express to After being harassed at school, a guid­ Named after San Francisco's fornner me their opinions on the type of learn­ ance counselor recommended the school openly gay city supervisor, who was assas­ ing environment Harvey Milk could to him, and he welcomed the thought of sinated in 1978, the school gives children provide. a new experience. an environment where they can focus 1. Why did you decide to go to Harvey 2. What is it like to attend a GLBT on their schoolwork, without worrying Milk? Were you recommended? based schcK>l? about harassment or distractions based Janine says that she likes school, but At Harvey Milk, Janine feels very able on their sexual or gender identity. (716) (315) _ ^ there were too many students in regular to be herself. She says, "I can say 'my girl­ There is much controversy surround­ schools, while Harvey Milk currently friend* and not have anybody look at me ing die consecrated opening of the school, fosters around 113. It's a better learning and say *wow' she's a lesbian." She claims 566- 2176 which has been ninning a similar program she has a brighter smile on her face and 703-0191 environment, with a low teacher-to- ibr students in need for several years with student ratio. Most who attend go by really wants to come to school now that the help of the Hetrick-Martin Institute. choice. She says she found Harvey Milk she's found Harvey Milk. Some consider the school an extension of Buffalo Syracuse through an ad in the newspaper, after she Daron is more into the fun and games the "separate but equal** laws of the Civil had currendy been repeatedly harassed aspect of Harvey Milk, where he's allowed Rights a^. Those against the opening in her old school, many times letting the to feel comfortable about being himself Flin provided by TdeCHOICE 327-6000 18+ of the school argue that there is no need discrimination erupt into fights. out in the open. He feels safe attending for a separate school to be opened for Daron says that he felt that he needed Avoid Tolls-Call us from your local access number. GLBTQSI students, but rather there is someplace where he could truly be *'out" Harvey Milk Continued on next page * Rut S Diy« 100% FREE (g hotw/diy) a need fbr existing schools to form No- THE EMPTY CLOSET w w w. g a y a 111 a n c e . o f

a video for classroom use and other Dignity- Friends can join us for a poduck on the This is a support group (not therapy) promotional materials will be available 14th at 6:30 p.m. at the GAGV. We'll intended to discuss the challenges facing for educators to assist in facilitating the RY THERESF FFI LER MEET PEOPLE: Integrity have supper and some decadent des­ gay fathers. Some topics for discussion week's activities. Check out this section and the Ongoing serts, then move the party to the Forum include dealing with wives, ex-wives, or The Lambda Network at Kodak is a Calendar to find the group that's rightfo r Dignity-Integrity Rochester is a faith for our monthly BEARNIGHT at the children; coming out to children, par­ The project is targeted at grades five gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender youl If you are already In a group send a community in the Roman Catholic and FORUM. The theme for February is ents, spouses, co-workers; building new through eight - years when the prob­ employee network at Eastman Kodak monthly news update to the The Empty Episcopal faith traditions. Wc meet every Closet, 179 Atlantic Ave. Rochester, NY long Johns, so break out your red woo- relationships or maintaining existing lem of name-calling is particularly acute Company. With the start of 2004, the Sunday at 5 p.m. at Saints Luke and 14607-1255 by the 15th of every month. lies and join the fun. relationships; issues with children and — although the concept can easily be Lambda Network has 100 members and Simon Cyrene Church, 175 Fitzhugh adapted for students at other grade lev­ a new Board of Directors, which consists We continue to meet every Monday your partner. St. All are welcome regardless of wor- els. of 24 new and returning board mem­ night, but our venue has changed. We're The meetings are held on the first •ship tradition, gender identity, or sexual A groundbreaking new video for bers. ^about having fun^ presently trying Michellina's on Henrietta and third Tuesday of the month (except orientation. June, July and August and the first grades 7-12, "Dealing with Differences be lead by parents COLAGE looks for Rd. at 6 p.m., our usual time. It's a nice The 2004 Lambda Executive Officers Please join us on Feb. 15 following our Tuesday of September, when we do ~ Open Dialogue about Lesbian, Gay the children to take an active role in Italian place, and the food has been are Patti McGory, President; Chuck Butch Femme planning and communicating meetings/ regular worship service for our monthly not meet), from 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. at and Straight Issues," includes four Campanella, Treasurer; Therese Feller, Atlantic Beacon Sculpture Committee is good. Check our website at empirebears. the GAGV, 179 Atlantic Ave. A group It's time for red hearts and love, love, events and assisting in the development potluck. This months poduck will have vignettes focusing on the discrimination Secretary and Linda Rinas, Membership planning a "Cabaret Night" fundraiser org for updates, sport events, pictures of social night is also sometimes planned love! Our Discussion Night topic on Feb. of educational ideas. a Mardi Gras theme. The Lenten season and harassment leveled against lgbt stu­ Coordinator. for Saturday, Feb. 28, from 8—10 p.m. events, and info on joining. We welcome on a monthly basis, for the fourth or 6 will be True Love Stories! Activities may include movie nights, begins this year on Ash Wednesday, Feb. dents. Following each segment, a panel The new Lambda Board held an in the upstairs lounge of Tara's at 153 men from 18-118 to join our group for fifth Tuesday of each month. Please call Come share your own love story (or poetry readings, brunches, and bowling 25. Why not plan to drop in during one of nine diverse student representatives all day workshop on Jan. 10 at Camp Liberty Pole Way. For more information friendship and fun. Woofl the GAGV at 244-8640 if you are inter­ someone else's!). It's 7-9 p.m. at the - and any others we can think of We of the Sundays of Lent to help prepare ested in finding out more information. shares their experiences, amplifying the Eastman, which included reviewing about this upcoming event, click on to serious effects anti-gay bullying can have GAGV, 179 Adantic Ave., corner Elton/ will also offer facilitated group discus­ for the Easter season? We have brochures about our group also Lambda strategies and setting goals for www.absd 4607.org. on all students. Atlantic Ave. Please bring a snack and/or sions and educational activities (i.e. shar­ The winter blues getting you down? available at GAGV. 2004. The Board voted Amy Friend ABSC had a busy holiday season, with The Gay Father's Group had their annu­ non-alcoholic beverage to pass. ing stories about our families, talking March 20 ~ save the date. That's when GLSEN Rochester trainers have been as Board Chair and Marian Herz as the very successful art raffle fundraising al holiday dinner at Rob and Will's home Our Social Event will be Dinner Night about having lgbt parents). we'll hold our "cabin fever" party. Check busy with requests from the Rochester Parliamentarian. The days events ended event which featured an original water- on Dec. 16. We had a great time and it Out on Monday, Feb. 23. Meet outside COLAGE offers many opportuni­ this space next month for complete City School District, Pittsford Mendon with a volunteer recognition dinner to color, "Toweling Off" by John Gilchrist. was nice to see members from previous the GAGV between 7 p.m.-7:15 p.m. ties for children of lgbt parents to build details. The Rochester chapter of GLSEN (Gay, High School, School of the Arts, Geneseo thank all of those who contributed to the Gary Pease, event chair, and several years come together and meet the new and we'll head out to a restaurant of the a community of their own and assists For more information about Dignity- Lesbian and Straight Education Network) High School and more. successes and accomplishments of the ABSC members sold tickets raising over members of the group. group's choosing! them with breaking down the isola­ Integrity, please see our display ad in this will hold its winter membership meet­ Think you might be interested in Lambda Network in 2003. $800 for ABSC. W.S. of Ohio was the Everyone brought a dish to pass, share ing on Feb. 5 at 7 p.m. at the GAGV For further information, contact tion they may experience by not having issue of the Empty Closet or phone 234- becoming a trainer? Come to the meet­ The third annual Winter 'BreakOUT" winner of this beautiful painting. and enjoy. Plenty of food to go around Community Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. Kerry at DressyFemme@)aol.com, connections and support from other 5092. We look forward to seeing you at ing on Feb. 5 at 7 p.m. and hear more Cabin Party is scheduled for Saturday, ABSC received a favorable response for everyone. Thanks go out to all of you (585)-865-4619, or write PO. Box COLAGErs. regular Sunday 5 p.m. service or any of Come and learn more about "No about our "Train the Trainer" sessions. Feb. 7, at .the White House Lodge from the City of Rochester's Sector for coming; we're looking forward to 18734, Rochester NY 14618. Our first meeting will be on Saturday, our events. All are welcome. Name-Calling Week" (March 1-5) and in Webster Park, from 12 p.m. to 7 Targeted Funding Initiative (STFI) for Feb. 21, from 2 — 4 p.m., at the GAGV doing it again soon. how to use the new "Dealing with p.m. The theme of this year's event is a matching grant towards the design and Com.munity Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. We will continue to meet on the first Differences" video as a teaching tool. Women's "Hawaiian Luau". Tickets are SIO in construction of the proposed sculpture Children, between the ages of 8 — 18, and third Tuesday of each month, at the Anyone with an interest in making advance and $ 15 at the door and can be slated for the intersection of Beacon and their parent(s), are invited to attend. Gay Alliance Center on 179 Atlantic schools safe for everyone is welcome to Hiking ordered by calling (585)234-4388. This COLAGE (Children Of Lesbians And It's cold, so bundle up when you leave Ave., at 6:30 - 8:30 p.m., and as always St. and Atlantic Ave. The sculpture will We request that at least one parent attend. We are gearing up for spring hiking... event will be sponsored by the Lambda Gays Everywhere) is a national commu­ the warmth of your cozy cave to join new members are welcome at any time. honor the history of the lgbt commu­ attend with their child/ren at the first "No Name-Calling Week" seeks to join us! Cool way to meet great women. Network at Kodak and GLOB&L at nity-based group that provides children the Empire Bears. You can gather at the Group information: nity. meeting. Refreshments and snacks will focus national attention on the problem We have lots of fun, and you are never Bausch & Lomb and is open to members of lgbt parents support, education, and GAGV for our monthly meeting on The group consists of men and in ABSC meets on Tuesdays from 6-7 be served. of name calling in schools and to provide alone because new ladies are always join­ and guests. advocacy in a comfortable safe environ­ Wednesday, Feb. 4 at 7:30 p.m. some cases, their same sex partners. p.m. every week. If you are an inter­ Please RSVP to students and educators with the tools ing our adventures. Meet new friends, or The 10*^^ Annual 2004 Lambda ested artist, community organizer, or just ment where they can meet, have fun, You can meet at Borders, across from We are all at different points in our and inspiration -to launch an on-going and get involved. [email protected], or call maybe find romance. Educational Event will be held on looking for a flin group to join, contact Marketplace, on the 6th or 20th to lives: some are married; some are going dialog about ways to eliminate name- Wednesday, April 7 at the Rochester This is a great opportunity for chil­ 585-244-8640. If you have any ques­ For information, call Donna Marie us at [email protected] for more choose a movie and then go out for a through the separation/divorce process; calling in their communities. Riverside Convention Center for dren with a similar family make-up to tions, you can also email us at the same Kearney at 585-442-6399. information. address, or visit the national website at late fish fry. On Sunday the 22nd, we'll and are in various stages of coming out. A resource guide with lesson plans. Groups continued on next page interact. Although initial sessions may www.colage.org. brunch at the Pink Elephant at 1 p.m.

•It .R-CCflfitllCC • t.Uni} N' Ot <>!IS,'!'!1 V\(ir "They will know we are ChristMstns by out love* ^r Geri Stanton Third Presbyterian Church nnogetHer we will create an Counseling Services a More Light Church MS.Ed., MS.Ed. Narionally Cerrifted Counselor Dignity-Integrity JL environment that promotes Certified Clinical Mental Health Counselor Sign Language Skilled where glbt persons are weteomed as (Roman Catholic-Episcopal) healing, provides support for exploring partners in ministry An active faith commumty since 1975, yonr personal journey and empowers Accepting new membefs into... Sunday Worship 10:30 a.m. you to make self-respecting choices. Women* s Deaf Gay (Child care available, wheelchair accessible Men's looped for hearing impaired) Liturgy every Sunday at 5:00 p.m. Bisexuality R. C. Liturgy of the Word - first, third, and fifth Sundays of the month. Group Group Episcopal Mass - second and fourth Sundays of the month. Monday (1st and 3rd) Social Hour following Liturgy. (CJK "YU. uJ'.^l*V>.*-.a , MS. Ed. GLBT Support Qroup 7:30 p.m. Nationally Certified Church of St. Luke and St. Simon Cyrene Individual • Couple • Group Office M Individual Couples, Groups at East Ave and Meigs St 17 South Fitzhugh Street (Corner of Broad and S. Fitzhugh) Sien Language Proficient Blossom Road Ps\ chothenipy 5S5.325.71S0 Rochester, NY 14607 (the chun-b with the pink steeple) 271-6613 (716) 3R^-47.\=; 595 Blossom Road Suite 315 TT\ www.thirdprest>yterian.org D-I Info-Line: (585) 234-5092 ,clt luccpciiKc • taniiK ^-^i ori-in woik • ciMUinunt^anon [xittcrn-- • hoJ\ Rochester, NN 14610 5S5.533-2041 (Recorded information and voice mail) E-mail: dirochesigrochestet.rt.com Web Site: http://www.ggw.org/DI-Rochcstct/ Pastoral care is available. ^BADBVB Denes, M-5- All ate welcome regardless of worship tradition, Elaine Elkins M.S. gender identity or sexual orientation. Psychotherapist Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church (^ounse oryLesoian Individual and relationship counseling: Empowering People • Embracing the Journey • Touching the World Join us as we claim our rightful place] Encouragement Sunday Moming Worship 11:00 A.M. in the Church! anxiety & depression Sunday Evening Worship 7:00 P.M. Caring loneliness & separation ^,* ><•-* lipiPiilli Cfirfsti CtmrcH resolving conflicts Jim Mulcahy, Interim Pastoral Leader (3u'

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taken. Sorry, i cannot accept ail requests. * 1 « ^ T :: V:\'|::;MII||i:i Hi, my name is Ckegory L. Hamilton Thanks fbr your interest. 461-4246 or #21147. I'm a 47-years-ok1, 5'11'' 165 lbs '.:i* ^^s -w^ •te a real, true small business mortgage and vehicle friend if given the chance. Race and age k^ans. Immediate response. Give us a cail l^^^s.. ^sWm are not Important. It's what Is in the heart r>^.i'' :%XB?"! at 1-866-219-7661. that counts. I will answer all who write me. Gregory L. Hamilton, #021147, PO Box Residential Cleaning 1989, Unit #1. Ely. NV 89301. + X ^^ *^ Occupied or vacant. 20 years experience, buy it. sell it. trade it. dependable, quality work, reasonable rates, references. Linny, 224-3933 HOUSEiiATESmOOMIMATES .1^.%* THE RIGHT PRICE: "isf.jto**'' Classified ads are $5 for the first 30 words; each additional word Is another $1. We do Hot oil rub, fuU-kody, ^.$^ ^ij'Sh' i^^i* .r- not t>lll for classifieds, so please send or t)ring ad and payment to The Empty Closet. 179 Treat yourself or a friend to a very relax­ Housemate, gay or lesbian, i-'tf Atlantic Ave. Rochester. NY 14607-1255. The deadline is the 15th of the month, for the ing, sensual rub. I'm a very friendly male to share large house by the water. Rent ,. ^. ..-^^¥?:rBS*^«Jti?*i*'>^:^^:iL:^'!*iS^^^ following months issue. We cannot accept ads over the phone. We publish fi'ee ads for with 8-plus years experience. Students reduction for assistance with care of the •fi^:'^Ji'h.'^ "v^ prisoners on a space-available basis. $13/hr. others $20/hr. Discretion assured. house. Ten minutes from downtown. To schedule an ap|x>tntment only, call Bedroom has balcony with view of water. THE RIGHT l>RICEs 585-325-7241. 7 p.m. - 11 p.m., or leave 266-4582 \£ '^ We will accept only ads accompanied by name and phone numfcTer. Neither will be pub­ a callback phone numt>er. CM lished, but we must be able to confirm piacement. The Empty Closet is not responsible „^SP^% Ifor financial loss or physical injury that may result from any contact with an advertiser. Eleetrieian for home and business FOR RENT Certified Advertisers must use their own box number, voice mail or personal address/phone numtjer. Telephone jacks, CATV, paddle fans. Call MPETulUPJ l,]lW*M^* Martin, 585-266-6337. Park/University Art walk. Used Spacious three-k>edroom apartment in a t^ ^j, -«>^ WiJHijUALITY HELP WANTED Victorian home. Gleaming hardwoods, a Vehicles decorative fireplace, eat-in kitchen and y^ANn VALUE!!! I BodylMuscle rubs formen . dining room. Off-street parking. $895 plus Volunteers Needed Outreach Specialist heat. Call 473-5088 3te the standard Volunteer for the Empty Closet. Are you Give your partner, a friend or yourself -to Black and Latino men who have sex a unique Valentine's Day gift! In-shape. ^*.*- , a reporter, reviewer, proofreader or pho­ with men. Requires one year of expe­ Park/East, Italian male (10 years experience) and/or ONLY equipment tographer? Would you like to help with rience working with Black and Latino Beautiful newly remodeled two- and three- tan construction guy. Reasonable rates, bulk mailing and distribution? Call Susan communities. Knowledge of HIV, preven­ bedroom apartments, txsth with amenities discretion assured, central location, days at 244-9030! tion and counseling preferred. Education galore. Open fioor plans, eat-in kitchen cars and or evenings. In/out/hotel calls (585) 235- requirement flexible based on experience, with dishwasher and ceramic tile, gas 6688. Calls accepted 7 a.m. - 11 p.m. to Metds On Wheels but college degree preferred. Must have fireplace, hardwoods and Jacuzzi bathtub. trucks used CM i set appointment. Meals On Wheels provides hot meals reliable vehicle and meet agency driv­ Laundry on premises. $995 and $1,150 and warm smiles to Monroe County's Tudor Creek House Bed & Breakfast ing policy. Annual salary $25,313 plus include all utilities. Call 473-5088 that meet car or elderly and homebound. During the win­ benefits. Resumes to AIDS Rochester, 750 sq foot, self-contained unit. Bathroom ter months, we need substitute volun­ Inc., 1360 University Ave, Rochester, NY and kitchenette en suite, fireplace and Park Avenue Area. the high truck! teers to deliver meals. Your gift of time 14607. No telephone calls, please. A must see! Newly remodeled two-bed­ A./C. Intimate weddings can t>e arranged. can provide the "winter reller needed. room apartment with den. Open kitchen/ Phone toll free 1-877-202-2259. Web: standards Can you spare an hour or two at lunch­ Male Performer Needed dining room with island, dishwasher, and «• f. www.tudorcreek.com time? Call 787-8326. Traveling Cabaret of Irondequoit seeks ceramic tile. Other features include a wet of the WmtSwK Mate Models Needed adult male performer for song, dance bar, hardwood floors, decorative fireplace Call for Work and comedy musical reviews. Year-round, and Jacuzzi. Off-street parking and laun­ ^-^j-.^Lt'.i'iss'M' J The Hartnett Gallery is inviting propos­ Professional photographer with studio is company tamfve looking for male models to expand his long-term interest necessary. Call 234- dry. $995 includes heat. Call 473-5088 >.-?, als from individual artists (or groups) 6677. interested in exhibiting their work at portfolio. I have experience with fine art, iffww.RentRochester.com that built fashion, and sports photography, and am .»6^ Property manager Apartments, houses, condos and more... I the Hartnett Gallery in the academic now looking to branch out with portraits fear. The gallery is located In Rochester, wanted for 4-unrt apartment building. also serving Genesee, Livingston, Ontario, and full-figure shots. Although I cannot Meigs St./Monroe Ave. area. Maintenance Orieans, Steuben and Wayne Counties. fheml ^New York, also home of the Intemational pay model fees, I am willing to work TFP [Museum of Photography at the Geotige and/or management skills required. In lieu 585-325-3640. ("trade for prints"). This means that the of salary, reduced rent options availab le. Eastman House, the Memorial Art Gallery model will be compensated with prints Property manager »•% Fax letter of interest andf resume Attn: ind the Rochester Contemporary (RoCo). for their time. You will receive three 8x10 iasj*. MW'l'aBWia;. Dave, fex # (585)346-6515. wanted for 4-unit apartment building. M': please submit a CV, proposal/descrip- prints, as well as a CD of the best images [tion of work, labeled slides (examples from the shoot. No prior experience mod­ Meigs/Monroe Ave. area. Maintenance HI of past work or proposed work), and eling is necessary, but you must be at least and/or management skills required. In i-i" .-s^t. 21 years of age. It's also not necessary that •*>** an SASE (for return of materials) by lieu of salary, reduced rent options avail­ March 22, 2004. Send all information to: you look like an A&F model, just that you able. Fax letter of interest and resume have an Interesting look and are in shape. The following prisoners are lonely and Hartnett Gallery Call for work, 2004/05, attn: Dave, fax # (585)346-6515. f*;?' You should expect to provide a picture by would appreciate hearing from anyone 201 Wilson Commons, University of *« .§> .^•> ''#M-=^f^ email prior to setting up an appointment, who will write: ^•f*^!^. Rochester, Rochester, NY 14627. EVERY GMCERTiriED.USeDVEHIClilNClUDES: •^"f but it does not have to be professionally

'^Ts Buii/iiem BUMHeRmiMITeja^WARRANTY i Earn adiMartBf dobns ftwaitfe ^V_ ' Position Availabie Oitilied ^ S^-HOUR CM ROWDSIDE.ASSISTANCE^,; USED VEHICLES Gav Alliance ca? THE ROCHOESXEa AREA ^ fREE A/VSfrispectens « toftg as V 100 PLUS POINWMSPECriON PROCESS If )tx/own yoer ne/Kcfe' ^^/of the Un«^ «iii^ Anti-Vioienca Program Coordinator J Many more awanfes-sw S9ib$ ApplicafUon Deadline: Ftfaruafy t6.2004 MILE MONEY BACK^CUARANTEE V person ftvctofsrfs' ppi r^ -^^^ -<»i, 5*/ •$?"lts^^ r *>. The Anti-Violence Program Coordinator is responsible for the development^ implementation, and overall coordinatk>n of the GAGV's same-sex anti-violence ^ -*'s*C*^V'^' T"^ ''S** *^*> program. This is a new program and the Coordinator must have visionary skills ar>d -> the at>illty to work with local law enforcement, the courts and the greater

'.*#i«.'^^^ community to develop and implement the program. Strong managerial and f 11 -t^ organizatkmal skills; good oral and written skills; alNlity to relate well to people of FOR DETAILS CALL 271-4475 'I diverse backgrounds and a knowledge of the special needs and concerns of the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community. A bachelor's degree Is required. Starting salary in mid $20's pkis benefits. .-;>»* .^••>N> .•i.< *-rts. ' Since 1973« ifae 0$y AUianee of the Genesee Valley has worked to improve the quaHiy of life fbr Grealcr Rochester's Gay. Lesbian, Bisexoal A Transsefider Community. Sewl w^ns letter, resume, and rrfemiees: Paul Beraon^, OcfNity DiCKlor, Gay Alliance of tte Gencaee Valky, 179 AtlaoMic Ave., \l^y Rodmttr.NY 14607 or PBeraBey^g^rallianoejooni •*tw ;i«V&|Si^ -ftw/'^ •« ,V COUNSELING SERVICES ENERGY THERAPIES i> f ;;'i*S!;t- MAXINE MCDONALD CSW'K, CASAC (585) 244-9550

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GAGV Sweetheart Ball Empire Bears brunch. 7 pm, dinner. 8:30 pm, dancing. Hyatt 1 pm. Pink Elephant, 581 E. Main St. Regency Hotel. For complete information on tickets and sponsorship levels, see ad In the Lifo. on back cover of this section (C), or call Feb. issue of TV newsmagazine. WXXI, 11 The Ongoing Calendar 244-8640. pm. Underwritten by Outiandish. Wilde Woolf Society. Tottm meeting on marriage. CONSISTENTLY SCHEDULED HAPPENINGS LGBT writers' open mic and Valentine Forum on the rights and responsit>ilities Day Party. 7 pm. Writers & Books, 740 of marriage. Speker: Ross Levi of ESPA. MOCHA coffee chat group/ or call 461-1338; 330-9738. Atiantic Ave. Info: (716)251-2132. Moderator: Donna Redwing. Location to RAonday University Ave. Open discussion for men of cokx who FOR FABULOUS FEBRUARY be announced; call 244-8640. Gay and Lesbian Support Group have sex with men. Coffee, refreshments. Country Une dancing Transgender Group Empire Bears Potluck Third Presbyterian Church, 4 Meigs St. First, First and third Tuesdays, 6:30 pm. MOCHA Every Wednesday at Muttiers. 7-10 pm. Last Saturdays, 2-5 pm, GAGV Community with Decadent Desserts, 6:30 pm, GAGV MONDAY 23 thircl Mondays, 7:30-9 pm, 338-3466. Free lessons. Kevin. 325-6745. Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. COAP at Winter Cabin Party, Project, 25 Franklin St., Suite 1060. 420- SUNDAY 1 Community Center; move on to Bearnight Triangle Talk. 1400. 12 pm. Call Jen7 Wang, 802-5868. at the Forum. After AIDS Bereavement Support Thursday Country line dancing Intbolc or Candlemas, "10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do Second, fourth Mondays. 4-5:30 pm, AIDS Second and fourth Saturdays, 6-9 pm. Call Ancient Celtic festival of light, sacred to Rochester Gay Men*s Chorus To Improve Their Lives," by Joe Kort. Youth of Color Group Presbyterians for Lesbian and Gay SUNDAY 15 Rochester, 1350 University Ave. Free. 442- 3-5 pm, MOCHA Pre)iect. 25 Franklin St., Kevin, 325-6745. Brigit, goddess of fire, poetry, healing and Valentine Wine Tasting. Discussion leader Cory Tylenda. 7 p.m.. 2220. Concerns smithcraft. Dignity-Integrity. Borders Books & Music. Free, open to Sibley Center, Suite 1060. 420-1400; 244- 5-7 pm. Wine Sense, 749 Park Ave. $20 8640. 6:30 pm, first Thursday. For location call Saturday Night Special Gay AA donation requested. 423-0650. Mardi Gras potluck follows regular 5 pm public. Co-sponsored by GAGV. Rochester Historical Bowling Society Ralph. 271-7649. 7 pm. Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd. S. TUESDAY 3 worship service. St. Luke and St. Simon 7:15 pm, Mondays. Glover Lanes, 2750 First Steps AA Meeting Men and women. Cyrene Church, 175 Fitzhugh St. 234- THURSDAY 26 MOCHA Project Meet and Greet. Georgia Beers book-siting, Monroe Ave. 7:30-8:30 pm. Downtown United Mercy Spiritual Companion Program Pride Connection, 728 South Ave. www. 5092. Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf 7-10 pm. The Pink Elephant, 581 E. f^aln COAP Mexican Dinner. Presbyterian Church. 121 N. Fitzhugh St. Evening of reflection for those impacted prideconnection.net. COAP St. Appetizers, cash bar. Meet old and new 244-8640. Open meeting but gay-friendly/ by HIV/AIDS. 7-9 pm. Call 671-6070 or (LRAD) MONDAY 16 6 pm, Eric S., 461 3174. Come Out and Play. Business meeting last MOCHA staff. welcoming. 473-6893. Fourth Saturdays, 6-9 pm. GAGV MONDAY 9 Mondays, 7 pm, GAGV Community Center, President's Day. FRIDAY 27 Community Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. THURSDAY 5 179 Atlantic Ave. Tom M., 454-3609. Wednesday Greater Rochester Gay and Lesbian Freedom to Marry Week. GifKGSJ Community Center closed. Empty Closet mailing party, Something for da Sistaz Feb. 9- 15. For information on national Business Forum GLSEN winter membership meeting. Noon-2 pm, stuff envelopes. 7-8 pm, American Baptists Concerned Women's Community Chorus Women's group, every third Saturday, events, see [email protected] or THURSDAY 19 Professionals' social group. Second 7 pm, GfKGM Community Center, 179 bulk mailing. Distribution routes - any time Third Mondays, 7:30 pm. Webster House, Rehearsals each Wednesday, 6:30-9 pm. MOCHA Project, Suite 1060, 25 Franklin [email protected]. Thursdays. 5:30-7 pm. 234-8706. Atlantic Ave. Help keep schools safe for COAP Cards Night. from noon to 7 pm. Downstairs at GAGV 57 Ambrose St. 442-5486. Call for location. 234-4441. St. 420-1400. Igbti students. 7 pm. Mike O., 415 6833. Caregivers Support Group TUESDAY 10 Community Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. 244- HIV Positive Gay Men Support group 9030. Gay AUiance of the Genesee Valley First, third Thursdays, 5:30-7 pm. Episcopal Pride and Joy Families Every Monday, 5 pm, AIDS Rochester, FRIDAY 6 SATURDAY 21 Board of Directors Diocese House, 935 East Ave. 231 -6808. Third Saturdays, 1 -3 pm, GAGV Community COAP Game Night. 1350 University Ave. 442-2220 x 3051. 7 pm.. Call Eric S., 461 3174. SATURDAY 28 Meeting, second Wednesdays, 7 pm, 179 Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. Butch Femme Connection. COLAGE Latino Mission Green Party (political) Atlantic Ave. 244-8640. Discussion Night topic: True Love Stories. FRIDAY 13 (Children of Lesbians and Gays Everywhere) Atlantic Beacon Sculpture Committee Second and fourth Thursdays, Third Sunday 7-9 pm, GAGV Community Center, 179 first meeting. 2-4 pm at GAGV, 179 Atlantic Cabaret Night fundraiser. 8-10 pm, upstairs Second Mondays, 7 pm, GAGV Community New Freedom New Haziness AA Gay Presbyterian Church. 7 pm. More Li<^t Presbyterians Atlantic Ave. 865-4619. Empty Closet deadline. Ave. Children must attend with at least lounge at Tara's, 153 Liberty Pole Way. Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. 234-6470. meeting Ads, articles and EVERYTHING. The 15*"' one parent. Refreshments. 214-9476, or WWW.ABSC14607.org. GLOB&L for gay and lesbian people and friends, Bassically Treblemakers Band 7 pm. Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd. 12:15 pm, last Sundays. Downtown United SATURDAY 7 or the closest working day to the 15**^' is [email protected]. Men and women. (Gays an^ Lesbians of Bausch & Lomb). now our only deadline of the month; please Krazy Quilt Cabaret. Rehearsals 4:30-6:30 pm, every Monday. Meets every third Thursday in /Vrea 67 Presbyterian Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St. Third Annual Winter Break Out Call Tim, 242-0237. call to reserve ad space ttefore the 15*". Cliche Masters training NYC Circle of Radical Faeries presents Support Group for Parents Who Have conference room at the Optic Center. Voice 325-4000. Cabin Party Ltsau. Feb. 21-22. Saturday 9 am- 4 pm; Sunday (This month only the deadline is the 13th). fundraiser for Faerie Camp Destiny, Transgender Group Lost Children mail 338-8977. Sponsored by GLOB&L (Bausch & Lomb). 9 am- noon. 244-8640. Grafton, Vt. LGBT Community Center, Parents and Friends of Lesbians and 244-9030. Second Mondays, Open Arms MCC, 175 First, third Wednesdays, 11 am-12:30 GALAXe pCerox) and Lambda at Kodak for Manhattan, 8 pm. $20 show; $25 includes Rochester Gay Men's Chorus Gays (PFLAG) Norris Drive, 6:30-9 pm. pm. Third Presbyterian Church, 4 Meigs members and guests. RSVP by Feb. 3. The Vkgina Monologues Pride and Joy Families raffle ticket. 646-263-9137. St. Sponsored by Genesee Region Home Downtown United Presbyterian Church, 2:30 -5 pm. Last Sunday. Call for location: Noon-7 pm. White House Lodge, Webster 1-3 pm, GAGV Community Center. Also Nazareth Arts Center, Feb. 12-14. $10 Care. Free. 325-1880. 121 N. Fitzhugh St. 7-9;30 pm. 423-0650. 234-0156. Park. Pig roast. Bring your favorite games, kick-off maeeting for COLAGE, 2-4 pm. Rochester Frontrunners/Frontwalkers adults, $5 students. 389-2170. RIT SUNDAY 29 Run/walk every Monday, 6 pm, meet wear your loudest Hawaiian shirt (win Inglewood Auditorium, Student Alumni (See article on page Cl). Frontrunners/Frontwalkers Free confidential walk-in HIV testing Dignity-Integrity a prize). $10 in advance, $15 at door. COAP Will & Grace marathon. George Eastman House parking lot. 271- Every Thursday night, 5-9 pm, AIDS 5 pm, St. Luke's/St. Simon Cyrene Church, Union. 8 pm, Feb. 13-15. $10; $5 students. 2709. 6 pm run/walk; meet George Eastman Please bring laundry detergent or canned 475-7464 V/TTY; 475-2239. WNY Lesbian Couples 10 am. Mark M., 734 0208. House parking lot. 271 -2709. Rochester, 1350 University Ave. 442-2220. 17 S. Fitzhugh St. Every Sunday. 234- GfKGM Community Cneter, 7-9 pm. 5092. goods donation for ARI. Invited: GRGLBF, Triangle Talk OUTWest, COAP, GAGV board, volunteers HAPPY LEAP YEAR! MOCHA movie ni^t SATURDAY 14 Fourth Mondays. Lgbt book discussion. Empire Bears and staff. SUNDAY 22 First Wednesdays, 7:30 pm, GAGV Second Thursdays, 6:30 pm. MOCHA Open Arms Metropolitan Community Borders Books & Music, 7 pm. Free. Project, 25 Franklin St., Suite 1060. 420- Church Sponsored by GAGV. Community Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. 1400. 175 Norris Drive, Cobbs Hill. 11 am. Tkiesday Transgender Group Contemporary worship service, 7 pm. Weekly GLBTI AA Meetings in Rochester Third Wednesdays, 6:30-9 pm, GAGV Friday 271-8478. Atlantic Five O Community Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. There are six reguiariy scheduled GLBTI AA friendly." Gleason Works and walk through the park­ Mixed men and women Gay men 50 and over. Second Tuesdays, Gay Men's AA meeting Gay Men*s Alcoholics Anonymous /\sbury Methodist Church, 1050 East Ave. meetings in Rochester every week. Mixed men and women. ing lot, or take the #1 Park Ave bus and Handicapped accessible, take the ele­ 6:30-8:30 pm, GAGV Community Center, St. Luke's/St. Simon Cyrene Church, 17 S. 7:30-8:30 pm. What makes GLBTI recovery a bit differ­ Handicapped accessible, take the ele­ walk one block north from Jine's. vator to the basement 179 Atiantic Ave. 461-0821. Multicom'4 Coffee Talk Fitzhugh St. 8:30 pm, 232-6720. Weekly. 7 pm. Spin Cafe (739 Park Ave.) Social for ent is that we recognize: issues surrounding vator to the basement. Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics This meeting begins with a speaker who Orleans Rainbow Fellowship Women's Movie Nigjht. Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Friends former Multicom-4 BBS members; other Third Fridays, 7 pm. GAGV, 179 Atlantic our sexuality can contribute to our alcohol­ Each week this meeting studies one of and addicts is followed by an open discussion. Support/social grouo, meets second Association (GLBFA) glbt cyber geeks welcome, every fourth Ave. 244-8640. ism and addiction; coming out and coming the Twelve Steps of AA and discusses how Men's meeting Sundays Tuesdays, 7 pm. For location call Dale, 589- Wednesday, 8 pm. U. of Rochester. Sundays, 5 pm, Morey to terms with ourselves as alcoholics or those steps relate to us and how to imple­ NOT handicapped accessible Rochester Gay Men: 8:30 PM at St. 9107, ore-mail [email protected] 401. 275-9379. E-mail: glbfa@uhura. addicts can be as traumatizing as coming ment them into our daily lives. This is a round-robin discussion meet­ Luke's Episcopal Church, 17 S Fitzhugh Gray Area cc.rochester.edu Gay Fathers* Support Group Support/social group for bisexual women. Rochester Rams bar nigfjt out and coming to terms with our sexuality; Wednesdays ing. If you are shy about meeting people St. Bus riders use the Fitzhugh St stop on First and third Tuesdays, 6:30-8:30 pm, First Wednesdays, 5;30-7 pm. For location, Third Saturday. 8 pm-2 am. Bachelor GAGV Young Adulu other drugs of abuse run rampant in our New Freedom/New Happiness Group: or speaking up in a group, you will find Main St at the County Office Building and GAGV Community Center, 179 Atiantic Ave. see http://home.rochester.rr.com/grayarea- Forum, 470 University Ave. 271-6930. Sundays 12-1:30 pm. GAGV Community community and we do not exclude those 7:00 p.m. at the First Unitarian Church, 220 this meeting particulariy warm and inviting walk south one block. Center. 179 Atlantic Ave. 244-8640. so addicted (you will not be shouted down S Winton Rd. Bus riders: Take the last #18 because everyone gets their turn to speak Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics Frontrunners/Frontwalkers 9 am mn/walk. Meet George Eastman GAGV Youth Group for speaking words like pot, cocaine, crack, (or pass). As a result, this meeting often University bus to 12 Corners. Use the stop and addicts House parking lot. 461 -4246. Ages 13-18. Every Sunday, 2-4 pm, GAGV heroin, ecstasy, K, speed, meth, pills, etc.); just past the top of the hill at Hillside Ave runs long, so plan on more than the usual Men's meeting Community Center, 179 Atlantic Ave. 244- the bars play a large role in socialization and before Highland Ave. Or take the #1 hour. NOT handicapped accessible Empire Bears 8640. within our community which can present Park Ave to the corner of East and Winton, Saturdays This meeting begins with a speaker who Second Saturdays, Bachelor Forum, 470 University Ave. Beariine: 234-3381. Rainbow Amateur Radio Assoc. challenges even when we are fully commit­ then walk five minutes south (uphill) on Saturday Night Special: 7:00 PM at the is followed by an open discussion. • Finger Lakes chapter. ted to our sobriety. After our meetings, we Winton. First Unitarian Church, 220 S Winton Rd. Cross Dresser Support Group Business meeting/lunch. Call Bob, frequentiy go out for coffee, dinner, mov­ This Is an open discussion meeting. All Bus riders: The #18 University Ave bus First Saturdays, 6:30-10:30 pm, GAGV. 179 442-7185. ies, whatever; while it's tempting to stay issues — as they relate to our alcoholism/ does not go hy the church on weekend in the fold of GLBTI recovery, we live and addiction and recovery — are fair game. evenings. Take the #1 Park Ave bus to the work in a predominantly straight society, Fridays (2 meetings) corner of East and Winton, then walk tive Richard so we encourage our members to include Free to Be: 7:30 PM at The Yellow minutes south (uphill) on Winton "straight" nrieetings in their program. House, 1601 Jackson Rd, Penfield. NOT Open meeting, all are welcome, "straight- Open meetings are open to alcoholics accessible by bus. friendly" Fenwick and addicts as well as to our partners, Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics friends, family and anyone else Interested in and addicts Contractor Marthtf M. Howden, CSW, CASAC the AA program of recovery. Closed meet­ Mixed men and women Now olhiftig Hunltr-Oougtafr 1 496 Wliite Spruce Blvd ings are limited to alcoholics and addicts. Handicapped accessible loBmrdraiM&NrKfifflW We ask that partners, friends, family and This can be a speaker, discussion or Rochester, New York curiosity seekers respect our privacy. steps meeting depending on what seems 716-272-1760 Voice 716-272-8986 FAX «id VMTf Ml Uinda . best at the time. Most Insurtmves Accepted DM|gpi,DryVMl,(Mtt| The First Steps Group: 8:00 PM at the Friday Night tepMitiK MiNNty llrogMiit Downtown United Presbyterian Church. Gay Men's: 7:30 PM at Asbury First 121 N Fitzhugh St. Bus riders: use the United Methodist Church. 1050 East Ave HqNi)i$10 fullrapiacomett t ^ Fitzhugh St. stop on Main St. at the County @ Berkeley St. Note: The meeting Is in Office Building and walk north two blocks, the Bishop's Residence to the left of the Fri9»«8iimatiM or use the Church St stop on State St church. Use the outdoor stairs to the base­ Anxiety • Depression • Alcohol • Stress • Grief across from the Federal Building and walk ment. Bus riders: The #17 East Ave bus Relationship -» Family Pain -» Rectification Work west one block turning right at City Hall. does not run evenings. Instead: Take the • ^*«Vr'- Open meeting, all are welcome, "straight- #18 University Ave bus. use the stop at Hoiotropic Breathwork ^uciaUzing In H^ork W^ ImlividuL ts mnd Families In $ke 0»mJMg Om Process ciej t =MPTV CLOSE w w w c, ,1 y Ll 111 a n c e o ' ^.:

THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY

Presents the 6th Annual Sweetheart Ball

'Bringyour Sweetheart or Meet a Sweetheart >y Saturday, February 14, 2004 7:00 p.m. Dinner ^ 8:30 p.m. Dancing Hyatt Regency Hotel, Dov\fntown Rochester For more information: 585.244.8640

,1 Ticket Information Sponsorship Levels Dinner/Dance Tickets Valentine Sponsorship level: $175 for GAGV members $40 per person for GAGV members $225 for non-members Includes: two dinner/dance tickets, bottle of (available at the GAGV or online champagne, box of Godiva chocolates, one long-stem at www.gayalliance.org) rose, one song request, a personal message displayed at the event, acknowledgement in the March Empty Closet $50 per person for non-members (available at Pride Connection, Sweetheart Sponsorship Level: Parkleigh, Outlandish) $150 for GAGV members $200 for non-members Includes: two dinner / dance tickets, one long-stem $35 members of Rainbow Seniors rose, one song request, a personal message displayed at the event, acknowledgement in the Dance Only Tickets March Empty Closet $12 per person in advance Won't be able to attend the Sweetheart Ball? $15 per person at tiie door Consider a Cupid Sponsorship.

Cupid Sponsorship Level: DJ's Include $125 for GAGV members DJ Miglity Mic: Red & Blacic Basil $150 for non-members DJ Cliuck Berry: Main Dance Floor Includes a personal message displayed at the event and acknowledgement in the March Empty Closet I •^v^ GayAlliance ^ of the* genese^nm9M^me valltvalicyv

Tickets Available Now!