April 16, 2013 - Uvm, Burlington, Vt Uvm.Edu/~Watertwr - Thewatertower.Tumblr.Com
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volume 13 - issue 12 - tuesday, april 16, 2013 - uvm, burlington, vt uvm.edu/~watertwr - thewatertower.tumblr.com by staceybrandt “Psychedelic funky noise-ass-shakin’ jam” was the response of bassist Braden Lalancette when I inquired about the genre of his new band. Braden, along with gui- tarist Brigham Burlingame, guitarist Nick Ledak, drummer Lincoln, and singer Steph Marandi, form the new band Squimley and Th e Woolens – a bizarre name which com- pliments the uniqueness of their style. Hav- ing recently played gigs in and around cam- pus at Radiobean and Slade, this bunch is ready to spread the love to all of Burlington. Squimley’s shows are characterized by a sense of joy and energy, which the crowd “even the most self- righteous hipster would tap his foot (ironically, of course)” Who do you want to be aft er you leave ing is off limits aft er graduation if you’ve sionate about creating local gardens and UVM? Th roughout our college careers, this got the drive and aptitude. I feel a bit guilty public natural reserves for the community. displays by dancing (in any combination question gets reworded and rephrased to us imagining how, aft er years of taking classes Donate your money, your time, and your of swaying, ass shaking, and arm fl ailing) a million times. Th e major we choose and in a specifi c fi eld for thousands of dollars, voice to any cause—whether it’s striving to and the band displays with their commit- the clubs we join may scratch at the surface I may go on to become a professional in spearhead preventative medicine through ment to the music. “We’re providing a good of this question, but the truth is you won’t some unforeseen career. our culture tendencies or endowing invalu- time and having a good time”, says Lalanc- know who you want to be until you are. I Moreover, I want to emphasize that able lessons to your children. ette, who believes that though everyone in work for Chatty Cats and I’ve had a variety you don’t have to spearhead some revolu- Many conversations with our ordinary the band has their own style, all the sounds of phone calls with alumni who represent tionary business or make millions of dol- alumni have changed how I talk about my work together. I think he has point. Smooth what UVM was in the past and demon- lars to justify your education aft er gradu- experiences at college. Th e age old question guitar riff s atop upbeat drums and bass strate what citizens this college can pro- ation. To date, the most popular careers I of “What do you plan to do aft er gradua- lines create grooves that could make even duce. During my hundreds of phone calls, hear from alumni are nurses, teachers, and tion” is less daunting once you’ve gotten a the most self-righteous hipster tap his foot the surest truth is that our alumni do good picture of what most alumni (ironically, of course). Soulful female vocals not just equate to what is found on our have done. Th e teacher in Texas, add a texture to the music which most jam Wikipedia page. inspired by her summer in Nicara- bands lack, and which puts Squimley in its Th e most interesting and unpre- gua, who now fi ghts passionately own category. dictable alumni are those who have to educate immigrants no matter It’s all about the vibes with Squimley gone on to work in a fi eld completely their legal status has taught me and the Woolens, and whether that vibe unrelated to their major. In this day about building upon and adapt- is cool, funky, or just groovy-hippie-shit is and age where the main goal of at- ing one’s experiences. Th e many up for audience interpretation. Th e gig in tending college is getting a career, it’s hard cubicle-type jobs. Sure, there’s a random ski instructors living on each pay check in the basement of Slade solidifi ed Squimley’s to fathom that aft er semesters of focused CEO of a bank in there—or my personal fa- Colorado have demonstrated the impor- presence on campus as well as their entry study there is no guarantee. A degree is vorite, a post-war zone archaeologist based tance of care-free living. My favorite con- into the underground music scene (literally not a binding contract; just because you’re in Hawaii—but those are the anomalies versation was with a graduate student who and fi guratively). Th ough the usual Slade a business major doesn’t assure you’ll start, more oft en than not. And, hey, it’s okay to has built a career upon medicinal musical crowd can be, well, a little strange, a sur- own, or even work for a business. Take the just live simply! Modern society puts pres- therapy in nursing homes and hospitals. prisingly mixed group of people showed up accounting major whom I talked to who sures on us to feel like if we don’t change Unlike the sage wisdom of our grandpar- to watch Squimley jam among dim Christ- now is an international pilot. Or how about the world than we have failed somehow, ents, alumni grew from the same location mas lights, washing machines, and artifi cial the home economics major who, without but I think that mindset fails to take into as us. Even if you don’t ever have the op- grass. Hell, even some lax bros ventured having taken a single math course while account small-scale humanitarians. Be portunity to really talk with alumni before into hippie territory to hear Squimley play. at UVM, now runs the books at a national like the woman from Williston who is cur- graduation, refl ect upon what sort of UVM Th e sudden removal of the band members’ contracting agency. Th e reality is that noth- rently unemployed but is extremely pas- alumnus you want to represent. ... read the rest on page 5 ... read the rest on page 10 apartment shopping how we became rappers test tube meat k-pop by lizcantrell by lauragreenwood and by coleburton by juliannaroen kerrymartin news ticker: seriously look up the tree guy now +++ pearls before swine: BBC uses students as meat shield for journalist making program on North Korea +++ cruelty to badgers increases twofold g by nickpatyck of Quick, vouched for the regularity of his potential attackers will most likely result actions. “I can’t imagine what would have in the detainment of innocents. The only On Tuesday April 9th, Dylan Quick of trated mostly by men aged 16 to 62. Anoth- happened to that young man to make him other option is intelligent prevention. Es- Lone Star Community College went on a er disturbing statistic indicates that one-in- do something like this. He is very normal.” sential to the health of a community is its with jamiebeckett stabbing spree. He managed to injure four- five women who attend college will become So why are “normal” kids wielding box emotional fluidity. Thus, early education teen people before being taken into cus- the victim. So why are college campuses cutters, and how to we prevent the recur- should emphasize the healthful expression The Common Cold – Everywhere I go I hear someone coughing up a lung. Maybe that’s just me suffering through my daily routine hacking up phlegm or it could be tody by police. such epicenters of violent crime? Within the fact that there is an epidemic on campus. To those of you whose constitution is better than an HIV positive elf, stay strong and power through finals. rence of incidents like this one? of emotions. Although elementary schools Was the attack premeditated? Abso- the report, a third of the attacks were con- In essence, mental healthcare must be do a good job at teaching kids basic math lutely. Quick “has had fantasies of stabbing nected to close relationships. The next Lack of Points – It’s that time of year again, the time where everyone who’s on unlimited likes to remind you how great their meal plan is. Shut up and throw your made clearly available to all who need it. and reading skills, there seems to be a dis- people to death since he was young.” (Dana leading cause was revenge, followed by “ro- There is no reason why such extreme vio- tinct lack of emotional education. Another faces in the Grundle, I’d rather starve, steal and scrounge to get by on points than have unlimited. On a serious note, I have no sympathy for people who ran out of Ford, CNN). Luckily, a group of students mantic rejection and obsession” (Daniel De points buying water. lent acts should take place when preemp- report on campus violence suggests that tackled the perpetrator and ended the Vise, Washington Post). tive action is possible. Sometimes there are students K-12 should take a required “in- madness. Yet this report fails to help schools pro- just obvious signs. For instance, directly troduction to mental health” course. It also Snow – Why is it still snowing? Go away. Seriously, where was the snow in January when I wanted to go snowboarding? Now it’s April and all I want is some sunshine Yet this incident is only one of many. file future killers. Is this possible? A good and bipolar Vermont weather decides to throw a whole slew of unpleasant weather events our way. Cum at me vitamin D! after the Columbine shootings of 1999, suggests that schools at all levels should As shown by a report by federal law en- starting point is an examination of the Seung-Hui Cho actually wrote a paper encourage the development of “organized forcement officers, over the past century mental support system offered by schools.