MONSTERS OF THE AMERICAN CINEMA ______
Christian St. Croix
Public Copy. Address available on request.
619-616-9625 [email protected] SYNOPSIS
When his husband dies, Remy Washington, a Black man, finds himself both the owner of a drive-in movie theater and a caregiver to his late husband’s straight, white teenaged son, Pup. The two have developed a warm and loving familial chemistry but their relationship fractures when Remy discovers Pup and his friends have been bullying a gay teen at his school. Monsters of the American Cinema is a haunting and humorous tale about fathers and sons, ghosts and monsters.
Monsters of the American Cinema was selected for a workshop performance as Scripps Ranch Theatre's 2018 Out On a Limb Play Series. It was then produced at the 2019 San Diego International Fringe Festival where it won the Fringe Award for Artists' Pick and Cultural Exchange, earning it a future opportunity to represent San Diego at a Fringe Festival in Australia. The San Diego Union-Tribune called it, “touching and funny”, “honest” and “engaging.” In January 2021, it selected as 1 of 5 out of over 200 international entries to receive a digital workshop and reading with the Prologue Theatre's FOREWARD: New Works Series. It was selected to be a part of the Urbanite Theatre's Outdoor Reading Series in March 2021. CHARACTERS
REMY WASHINGTON Thirty-seven. Black. Gay. An aging activist who runs a drive-in movie theater in Santee, California. Remy leads his two-male household with a dry and loving sense of humor, but he knows when to drop the “cool dad” vibe and command respect. He's deliberately unrefined and not particularly interested in extravagance or luxury. His working class roots should be obvious in style and dress. He may or may not have tattoos.
PETER “PUP” MILLER Sixteen. White. Straight. Remy's charge. An aspiring filmmaker. Little more than a kid with a camcorder as of now. Pup's an awkward collection of nerves and hormones. He's growing into a set of prom-king good looks, but he hasn't quite left his adolescent geek phase behind. Fueled by peer pressure, he's learned how to successfully mimic a Cali- bro style of speaking when around his friends. He sprouts a little chin stubble.
SETTING
The action takes place in three areas of a modest mobile home on the lot of a small drive-in movie theater in the town of Santee, California, San Diego County:
The Kitchen. Neat, with cheap, studio-issued film memorabilia (the kind of useless stuff sent to all movie theaters in operation) collected and repurposed as decoration. Maybe there's salt and pepper shakers shaped like Star Wars characters. Maybe there's a clock on the wall boasting the Back to the Future logo. It's functional with a sink, cupboards, drawers, and a window that offers an easy weather check. It's also spacious enough to host a table, two matching chairs, and a refrigerator. Somewhere on the counters, there's a knife block. There's a wall-mounted coat rack near a kitchen door that leads outside of the mobile home. The entrance to a hallway leading to the rest of the mobile home may be visible, but won't be used. Nearby, in a section hinting at a living room area, an old and broken-in recliner sits. A door to a bathroom is visible as is another door leading directly into...
Pup's Bedroom. A classic monster movie lover's happy place. There's a bed. Film posters crowd the walls. The largest and most prominent is a Creature From the Black Lagoon poster.
Mobile Home Rooftop. Flat and even, often occupied. Two worn and mismatched lawn chairs, maybe a cooler. Accessed by a ladder.
TIME
The Present. High School Homecoming Season. NOTES
This play is performed without an intermission.
The duologues are thoughts and memories. Neither Remy nor Pup hear the other's side of the duologue. There should be no pauses when they switch from one character's side of the duologue to the other. When one stops, the other starts.
El Cajon = El-Caw-Hone. Filippi’s = Feel-LEE-Peez.
“A moment” marks short or long dramatic pauses depending on the...moment. MONSTERS OF THE AMERICAN CINEMA
SCENE 1 WE JUST EXIST
Lights rise on the roof of a mobile home. The sky is clear. The sun's just going down. There's a couple of lawn chairs, but REMY WASHINGTON, thirty-seven, Black, isn't bothering with either. He's sitting cross- legged before a piece of poster board and a small collection of bottled poster paint. Paint brush in hand, he's putting the finishing touches on a sign. A pack of cigarettes and a lighter sit on top of a small radio set. These are thoughts.
REMY (to the audience) We met at a rally. Transgender Equality. Have you noticed how corporatized rallies and protests have become lately? They’re practically sponsored. Half surprised a Red Bull blimp doesn’t fly over every last one of them. Last protest I went to, this man had his little girl selling merch. No shit. Cute little thing, her barrettes matched her little dress. She walked up on me with a Melanin Magic T-shirt and tried to talk thirty bucks out of me for it. I mean, she succeeded. Even threw in a tip. She was too adorable to say no to. (a moment, realizes he hasn't introduced himself) Oh. Sorry. Remy Washington. Age thirty-sev--four... (a moment) ...two. Owner and proprietor of the Good Time Drive-In, here in Santee, right outside of San Diego off the fifty-two.
Santee is...small. Population: mostly white. The, um, red kind of white. Quiet...for the most part. This charming pair of locals--husband and wife team--they decide to do a little shopping at a Food 4 Less grocery store, both with large swastika designs on their matching T-shirts. Another customer, she sees this. Things gets hot, words are exchanged, a fight ensues. The wife takes a hell of a wind-up punch to the grill and lands chin first into a bread display. One of the store clerks gets this on phone cam, puts it on Twitter, it goes viral, and two days later, an article comes out in the San Diego Union-Tribune that officially unofficially nicknames the city, “Klan-tee.” That Food 4 Less grocery store? It's two blocks from here.
1 REMY [CONT'D] We get a good sized crowd, all things considered. Multiplexes play the new shit, but we cover the classics. Casablanca. Psycho. Citizen Kane. We even do the old musicals. Singin' in the Rain, West Side Story. Every Christmas, we show It's a Wonderful Life, and every once in awhile, we'll even do Grease. I mean, it was shot in '78, so it's not an oldie-oldie technically, but this particular clientele doesn't seem to mind that.
Our biggest nights are the Monster Movie Double Features, Fridays and Saturdays, starting at dusk. Two-for-one admission, children under four are permitted free. If dining at our lovely snack bar, we offer a limited range of enjoyable snacks and beverages. Hot dogs, nachos and popcorn--also two-for-one on Monster Movie nights.
Lights up on Pup's bedroom, its door open, and PETER “PUP” MILLER, sixteen, white. He's in an undershirt and a pair of boxer shorts. A dress shirt and a pair of slacks lie on his bed. As he speaks, he begins putting the shirt and slacks on. A pair of dress socks also lie on the bed, but he doesn't put them on yet. There's a Creature From the Black Lagoon poster on his wall.
PUP (to the audience) Peter Miller. Everyone calls me Pup. It’s, like, a nickname. I’m sixteen-- just turned sixteen. Um. I’m a Junior. I live in Santee, the mobile home behind the Good Time Drive-In. Ummm. (a moment) I don't know what else to-- (a moment) I live with...his name's Remy. He's, like, my guardian. He was married to my dad. He owned the Good Time. My dad, not...
But when he died, it went to Remy. Remy's gonna let me run it when I'm old enough, if I want to.
Remy drops the paint brush, taking a break. He takes a cigarette from the pack on top of the stereo and lights it.
2 REMY (inhaling, blowing smoke out) So this rally, it was at a gay bar in Hillcrest—Hillcrest, that’s the “gay friendly neighborhood” in San Diego. The organizers invited some politician to give a speech and I’m like...ehhhh. Like, if you know me, I don’t do politicians. So when the suit took the podium... (wags the lit cigarette) I took a ten-minute cigarette break. Protests, rallies, they're exhausting. And they've changed, like I said. The sponsorships, and now there's a lot of rich and guilty white folks from freshly scrubbed neighborhoods, all in their designer blouses and CrossFit gear, trynna get on the news and best one another with the most creative protest signs.
Remy shudders dramatically.
PUP (gestures at the poster) Creature From the Black Lagoon. It's my favorite. I mean, I like most of them, but in “Creature”, there's this part where Gill-man kills Richard Denning, then climbs up the side of the boat, and when Richard Carlson-- two Richards, right--when he's distracted by the fallen logs, Gill-Man grabs Julie Adams and pulls her overboard into the water. He's swimming with her to his underwater cave and the special effects are so corny, but like a good “so corny.”
REMY They'd invited a politician to speak. A goddamned politician! Look, I don’t care what party you go for. Once you’re one of them, you’re not one of us. You'll say whatever you need to say just to get those votes. Us? The folks from the streets? We're there for the right reasons. We’re out there, balls to the ground, really trynna make shit happen.
So I'm outside of this bar, I'm smoking, and there’s, like, this guy standing a few feet away from me on the sidewalk. Wild red hair, denim jacket, kind of a porn-stache thing going on, totally not my type. And he’s smoking a cigarette too. Or, I mean, I thought it was a cigarette. It was a joint. You know I never got into weed? Yeah, tried it once when I was fourteen at a friend’s house. I remember I crawled beneath her kitchen table and couldn’t figure out how to crawl back out again.
PUP And then the scene when Gill-man carries Julie Adams into the cave? Urban legend is that the stuntman accidentally struck Julie's head against the side of the set and she was truly unconscious for the shot they used in the film. She'd later say it wasn't true.
3 REMY At that time in my life, there was nothing a white boy could do for me but fetch my slippers. So I rolled my eyes, looked away, figured he’d get the message and find something else to stare at. But I look up and he’s still, like––his eyes are still on me. Then he starts to walk over and I’m thinking, “Fuck, I don’t want to have to cuss this white boy out.” The white gays have this bad habit of treating us like we’re Thug Porn. Like we’re these soulless stallions who don’t have any thoughts or feelings or, like, a favorite Beyonce song—Love On Top—or anything. It’s not uncommon for some plucky bottom to walk up on us asking about the size of our dicks before even asking our names. (returning to his work on the poster) So yeah, he gets to me, and he goes, “Excuse me, are your feet tired?” The lamest, most cliché pick-up line. He got me. He got me with that one.
PUP I had to be six, seven. He said I'd wake him up in the middle of the night, screaming about a monster. I think...I remember shapes. And eyes. I couldn't see them clearly, but I know they saw me. I remember it talking to me. Whispers at first. And then roars.
REMY So he asks if he can join me and I’m like, “Fuck it, why not?” He stands next to me and—this is what did it for me—he didn’t say a word after that. And I smoke my cigarette and he smokes his joint, and we both just...exist.
I think sometimes people have to fill every waking moment with the sounds of their own voices. Like, no one just enjoys the silence. I’m the type—you can be right there on my hip and I'll just want to listen to the city. I like the sounds of cars and power lines and wind, y’know? Like stay with me, but be silent. Listen, y’know?
PUP Dad took me to a psychiatrist once. “Total quack”, from what I remember him saying. I remember because I thought it was funny that he'd said “quack”, I was a kid. He spent a lot of money just to have some dude tell him to start giving me antidepressants. Dad didn't like that idea. He didn't like the idea of medication period because...
He used to say, “The world is one big ball of drugs.” His mother used to do heroin too. I heard him telling Remy about it one night when they thought I was sleeping.
4 REMY The suit on the mic inside the bar says some fake cheerleader shit and the crowd goes crazy. But I was outside smoking with Brian.
Remy pulls a chain with a ring hanging from it from the inside of his shirt. He cups the ring in his hand, holds it close to his chest.
REMY [CONT'D] (a moment) That’s his name...was his name. He's...no longer with us. Brian. Together for four years, married for two of them, and the first time we met is still my favorite memory of him. (a moment, a smile, small and sad) Stupid white boy.
Lights rise on the mobile home's kitchen. A camcorder with a playback screen also lies on the table. A dress jacket with a tie laid over it sits on the back of a recliner that sits just outside of the kitchen area. A denim jacket hangs from a wall-mounted coat rack next to the kitchen door, above a pair of mens dress shoes.
Pup, now dressed in the slacks and dress shirt, enters from his bedroom. He looks around, noticing Remy isn't there.
PUP (calls out) Remy?
REMY Shit.
Remy flicks the cigarette over the side of the roof. He loads the poster paint bottles and the poster board in his arms and climbs down the ladder. It's a struggle, but he manages. He enters the kitchen door, rushing and dumping the poster paint on the table before he can drop them. He lays the wet poster board down on top of it all.
5 PUP Were you smoking again?
REMY (quickly, out of breath) Nah bro, you know I quit. What's up?
PUP I can't find my...
Remy holds the poster board up for Pup to see. It's a sign. It reads: “GAY OWNED.” It's very...green.
PUP [CONT'D] (the sign is hideous) ...tie.
REMY Real thoughts, okay? And don't go easy on me just cuz my heart's on the line.
PUP Needs more green.
REMY You think?
PUP “Gay Owned” what?
Remy crosses, hands the poster board to Pup and gestures at him. He's gay owned.
REMY It's a new addition for the snack bar. Mandy wore her “Eat Pussy, Not Animals” tee last week and one of Santee's finest gave her a hard time. (taking and laying the poster board back on the kitchen table) So this is a declaration. You come to the Good Time, you are on gay- owned land. Show some respect.
PUP Why doesn’t Mandy just wear her uniform? You wear your uniform when you're working the snack bar.
6 Pup crosses into his bedroom. He scans the top of his bed for his tie. He turns, spots the pair of dress socks and picks them up.
REMY (calling after him) It gets hot behind the counter with the hot dog steamer and the popcorn machine going.
Pup crosses from his bedroom with the socks.
REMY [CONT'D] What were you looking for again?
PUP My tie.
REMY (snaps his fingers) Your tie! Right. The Case of the Missing Tie.
PUP I just had it.
Pup crosses into the bathroom on his search. Remy spots the tie on the back of the chair. He picks it up and crosses to the bathroom. Pup exits and Remy throws the tie around Pup's neck and begins to tie it for him.
PUP [CONT'D] I can do it.
Pup takes the tie into the bathroom. Remy stands by the bathroom door, waits knowingly. A moment and Pup exits with the tie. He hands it to Remy who begins to tie it on for him, a comical pout on his face.
PUP [CONT'D] What's that?
7 REMY (deepening the pout) Hm?
PUP What are you doing with your face right now?
REMY Nothing! (a moment, then in a baby voice) You're just my widdle man...
PUP Stop it.
REMY I'm, like, really feeling this shit right now. Look at you! You're all man sized, got a little chin sprout going. And you smell like you’re about to get married to a chick you know I’m totally gonna hate.
Remy's done with the tie. He sniffs Pup.
REMY [CONT'D] (sniffs) Scratch--you smell like me. Are you wearing my cologne? What happened to your cologne? You too good for Axe body spray now?
PUP Did you go to Homecoming?
REMY (a moment) You think I'd be living vicariously through you if I did? Woop! That reminds me.
Remy rushes to the denim jacket next to the kitchen door and pulls a box of LifeStyles condoms from the pocket. He hands them to Pup.
REMY [CONT'D] Homecoming's the dance the kids go horizontal after, right? Or is it Prom? I get my heteronormative traditions mixed up.
8 PUP (scrunches nose at the box) LifeStyles?
REMY I know. Thought we'd be a Trojan household, but the liquor store was all out.
PUP (hands the box back to Remy) I won't need these.
REMY You're saying that because you don't see what kind they—look, look! (holds condoms up) “Ultra Sensitive.”
PUP Mia and I are just friends.
REMY “Mia.” So she has a name. She tell you what color dress she's wearing?
PUP She's wearing pink. Cameo Pink, thank you, Google.
REMY Good boy. What color hair?
PUP It's...dark. She keeps it short.
REMY Like how short? Demi Moore Ghost? Alien 3 Sigourney?
PUP Not like...her hair's... (a moment) She's Black.
REMY Like, a Black girl? A real-life Black girl? You're taking a Black girl to Homecoming? D-do we gotta rent a limo, or--?
PUP I'm walking over with some friends, meeting her there.
9 REMY Why didn't you tell me your date is Black?
PUP Does it matter?
REMY Yes! (quickly) No! (a moment) So you remember the rules then?
PUP Don't call her “exotic.” Don't call her “chocolate”, she's not a flavor. Don't touch her hair without asking. Don't ask to touch her hair.
REMY (fist in the air) Stay woke! (holds condoms up) Just take one. Two.
PUP Mia's just a friend.
Pup looks down at his feet, realizes he's not wearing socks, rushes back into his bedroom and begins searching for them. Remy leans on the wall by his door.
REMY Have I ever told you the Legend of Dawson's Creek? A long time ago–– 1998––in a magical and enchanted land known as Massachusetts, there lived a bright young lad named Dawson. He had a “just a friend” too. A lovely young maiden named Joey, short for Josephine––
Pup enters again and begins scanning the kitchen.
PUP Even hormonal teenagers can have friends of the opposite sex.
He crawls on his knees and checks beneath the table.
10 REMY What are we looking for now?
PUP I can't find the socks.
REMY You must've moved them.
PUP Why would I move them? I put them there specifically so I wouldn't move them. I had a system planned. Slacks, shirt, tie, socks, shoes, jacket.
REMY (crossing and entering the bathroom) Wouldn't it make more sense for the socks to come before the slacks?
PUP You know how my feet sweat. I was gonna put them on last.
Remy enters from the bathroom with the dress socks and holds them up as Pup turns to him.
REMY They were in the sink. Not even gonna ask.
Remy hands the socks to Pup. He sits at the table and begins putting them on.
REMY [CONT'D] Speaking of hormones--you power wash the shower this morning like I asked?
PUP Yes, I did.
REMY I don't want to double check. Really don't want to double check.
PUP Roof to drain, and we're out of Fabuloso.
11 Pup crosses to the kitchen door and slips his feet into the dress shoes.
REMY Okay. Good.
As Pup crosses to the dress jacket on the chair and puts it on:
REMY [CONT'D] (a moment) Because I was, like, my body wash is green and Pup's is blue, so then what is this stain on the tile? Was the kid icing a cake or something? Then I realized it was one of the ten signs that you're living with a teenage boy--
PUP (annoyed, embarrassed) I cleaned the shower!
REMY Judgment-free zone here, I was a teenage boy too. But, dude, shower's community property.
PUP (holds arms out) I think I'm...how do I look?
A moment as Remy looks at Pup. He pouts again.
PUP [CONT'D] Stop that.
REMY (wiping faux tears away) If only the Suit Emporium could see you now. Stand just like that.
Remy takes a smartphone out of his back pocket. Pup poses and Remy snaps a pic.
REMY [CONT'D] Okay, now work it from the side.
Pup strikes a side pose. Another pic.
12 REMY [CONT'D] Yassssss, bitch! (crossing behind Pup) One more for the 'gram.
Remy holds the smartphone up, selfie- style. Both guys make silly selfie faces, Pup with duck lips, Remy, winking with his tongue out. Remy steps away from Pup, checking the pictures in his camera roll.
PUP What are you playing tonight?
REMY Uhhh. The Little Shop of Horrors. The original, not the musical. The one with Jack Nicholson. And the double is I Was a Teenage Werewolf.
PUP I'm gonna miss “Little Shop?”
REMY I can throw it on anytime you want. How 'bout tomorrow night? We can do our own double feature like in the olden days before you started growing armpit hair. Ooh! “Little Shop” and “Black Lagoon.” That's the pair right there. The lot will be closed, we'll have the joint to ourselves. It's a date?
PUP It's a date.
REMY Right on! Tomorrow night. Pick me up at eight.
A moment. Pup runs his hands through his hair. Remy watches him, suspicious, amused.
PUP Who's in the projection booth tonight?
REMY I'm on the projector. Are you okay?
PUP I'm...thumbs up. You think Mandy'll need help at the snack bar?
13 REMY I gave Mandy the weekend off. (continuing the questioning) You sure?
PUP Very sure. Who's working the snack bar?
REMY I got Nate coming in.
PUP Nate's coming back?
REMY Just for the weekend.
PUP I thought he moved to Vista.
REMY He did. He's doing me a favor.
PUP That's nice of him. I like Nate. Good ol' Nate. (strikes a bodybuilder pose) Muscle Shirt Nate. (makes comically sexy eyes at Remy) Looks At You Like This Nate.
REMY I'm sure I don't know what you're implying.
PUP He likes you.
REMY Nate does not like me.
PUP He likes you.
REMY He was an employee, he will be an employee tonight. Nothing more, nothing less.
14 PUP I'd be okay. Y'know, if you wanted to...start dating again.
REMY Really? (touched) Aww. Pup.
PUP Of course, his family will have to pay the dowry.
REMY I walked smooth into this.
PUP A couple of mules and your weight in silver oughtta do it. And we’d have to make absolutely sure he isn’t a vampire. I mean, he worked here for years, but did we ever really get to know him? Huh? I’m thinking the Lost Boys test. We invite him over for dinner, serve him spaghetti with extra garlic...
REMY Pup.
PUP You think he'd be cool if I called him Papa Nate?
REMY You're the only man I need in my life.
PUP (a moment, he runs his hands through his hair) Who's cleaning the restrooms?
REMY (a moment as he watches Pup) Your dad used to do that. The hair thing. I had to force his hands away from his head the day we got married. You remember? (Pup groans) Don’t. This isn’t gonna be one of those “I wish he could be here now to see what a fine young man you've grown into” things. I mean, I do wish he was here to see what a fine young man you've grown into...and to help with the drive-in...and the dishes. You just remind me of him. He'd only do the hair thing when he was––oh my god.
15 PUP Don't do this.
REMY Oh my god.
PUP This is beneath you.
REMY You're nervous! This is so precious.
PUP This is childhood trauma. This is how the Joker got started. You're making me the Joker.
REMY Okay, one: You're the Penguin at best. Two: We need a rap session?
PUP We don't need a rap session.
REMY (sits at the table) Rap session! Sit 'er down, boy.
Pup sits at the table.
REMY [CONT'D] Talk to Dr. Phil.
PUP Mia's just a friend, alright? Just a friend.
REMY Friend, double-underlined. Got it.
PUP But what if she, like...she wants to...?
Pup begins to move his upper body. It's horrible.
16 REMY (realizes) You don't know how to dance! The White Man's Burden. Your dad danced like he was fire walking. Bit his bottom lip and everything, it was bad. (stands) Okay, easy fix. Dance lessons.
PUP (stands) Maybe a quick tutorial.
REMY Bring her in, kid. Come on. Love on Remy.
Pup crosses to Remy.
REMY [CONT'D] Okay, it's been awhile since I've danced with a girl, or at all. But I think you'd be safest with the basic two-step. (demonstrating) Step left, middle. Step right, middle. Come on. (as Pup begins to move with him) Left, middle. Right, middle. Left, middle. Right, middle. There it is. And then, from here, you can kinda do your own thing with your shoulders... (he demonstrates) ...move your hips a little bit...
Remy demonstrates. Pup tries. It's bad.
REMY [CONT'D] And if this doesn't work, you can also fake a leg cramp and sit it out.
We hear the sound of a text tone. Pup separates from Remy and takes his smartphone out of his pocket.
PUP (a moment) My friends are at the park.
Pup takes his camcorder from the table.
REMY You be careful with that thing. It's worth more than both of our lives.
17 PUP (a moment) You'll be okay tonight?
REMY Go! Go meet up with Shaggy and Velma.
Pup makes a slow cross to the kitchen door. He turns, looks at Remy, five seconds from losing his nerve.
REMY [CONT'D] Monsters of the American Cinema: Bandages. Thread! Go!
This is a little game between them.
PUP (quickly) The Invisible Man!
REMY (quickly) The Invisible Man Returns!
PUP The Invisible Woman!
REMY The Invisible Agent!
PUP Abbott and Costello Meet the Invisible Man!
REMY Abbott and Costello Meet the Mummy!
PUP The Mummy!
REMY The Mummy's Curse!
PUP The Mummy's Tomb!
18 REMY The Mummy... (he lost) ...Episode Three, Revenge of the Sith. Shit, I should've went with “tomb.” What goes with “tomb?” Ghost! Frankenstein's Ghost!
PUP Too late.
REMY The Abbott and Costellos shouldn't count. They always mess me up.
PUP It's about the journey.
Pup is laughing, more relaxed now.
REMY (a moment) You have fun tonight. Dance for the both of us. Even if you suck at it.
Pup exits. Remy exits behind him, climbing up the ladder and standing on the roof, watching him go.
REMY [CONT'D] (calls down after him) Don't touch her hair!
19