Heaven's Got Talent
Total Page:16
File Type:pdf, Size:1020Kb
HEAVEN’S GOT TALENT by Brian Yapko Copyright Notice CAUTION: Professionals and amateurs are hereby warned that this Work is subject to a royalty. This Work is fully protected under the copyright laws of the United States of America and all countries with which the United States has reciprocal copyright relations, whether through bilateral or multilateral treaties or otherwise, and including, but not limited to, all countries covered by the Pan-American Copyright Convention, the Universal Copyright Convention and the Berne Convention. RIGHTS RESERVED: All rights to this Work are strictly reserved, including professional and amateur stage performance rights. Also reserved are: motion picture, recitation, lecturing, public reading, radio broadcasting, television, video or sound recording, all forms of mechanical or electronic reproduction, such as CD-ROM, CD-I, DVD, information and storage retrieval systems and photocopying, and the rights of translation into non-English languages. PERFORMANCE RIGHTS AND ROYALTY PAYMENTS: All amateur and stock performance rights to this Work are controlled exclusively by Christian Publishers. No amateur or stock production groups or individuals may perform this play without securing license and royalty arrangements in advance from Christian Publishers. Questions concerning other rights should be addressed to Christian Publishers. Royalty fees are subject to change without notice. Professional and stock fees will be set upon application in accordance with your producing circumstances. Any licensing requests and inquiries relating to amateur and stock (professional) performance rights should be addressed to Christian Publishers. Royalty of the required amount must be paid, whether the play is presented for charity or profit and whether or not admission is charged. AUTHOR CREDIT: All groups or individuals receiving permission to produce this play must give the author(s) credit in any and all advertisement and publicity relating to the production of this play. The author’s billing must appear directly below the title on a separate line where no other written matter appears. The name of the author(s) must be at least 50% as large as the title of the play. No person or entity may receive larger or more prominent credit than that which is given to the author(s). PUBLISHER CREDIT: Whenever this play is produced, all programs, advertisements, flyers or other printed material must include the following notice: Produced by special arrangement with Christian Publishers. COPYING: Any unauthorized copying of this Work or excerpts from this Work is strictly forbidden by law. No part of this Work may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form, by any means now known or yet to be invented, including photocopying or scanning, without prior permission from Christian Publishers. Copyright © Christian Publishers Printed in the United States of America All Rights Reserved HEAVEN’S GOT TALENT A Christmas Competition By Brian Yapko 2 HEAVEN'S GOT TALENT HEAVEN’S GOT TALENT A Christmas Competition By Brian Yapko SYNOPSIS: A friendly competition takes place in heaven to determine which angel with be the Herald Angel who will announce the birth of Jesus. CAST OF CHARACTERS (5 females, 6 males, 6 either; extras) IN HEAVEN: ANGEL ANNOUNCER (m/f) ................. (1 line) GABRIEL (m) ......................................... Co-head angel. (17 lines) URIEL (f) ................................................ Co-head angel. (20 lines) MICHAEL (m) ........................................ An older experienced angel. (11 lines) MURIEL (m) ........................................... An older experienced angel. (7 lines) CLARENCE (m) ..................................... A young angel. (10 lines) ARIEL (f) ................................................ A young angel. (5 lines) ANGELICA (f) ........................................ A newly-arrived angel. (10 lines) IN BETHLEHEM: JOSEPH (m) ............................................ (29 lines) MARY (f) ................................................ (21 lines) INNKEEPER (m) .................................... (15 lines) INNKEEPER’S WIFE (f) ........................ (13 lines) MAGI 1 (m/f) .......................................... (4 lines) MAGI 2 (m/f) .......................................... (4 lines) MAGI 3 (m/f) .......................................... (5 lines) EZRA (m/f).............................................. A shepherd. (10 lines) JETHRO (m/f) ......................................... A shepherd. (13 lines) EXTRAS: Additional non-speaking angels if available. DURATION: 15-20 minutes. This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. BRIAN YAPKO 3 PRODUCTION NOTES SET: You will need to visually divide your stage in two: one side for heaven and the other side for Bethlehem. The set for heaven may be quite abstract. Paper clouds or some silver paper as a backdrop should suffice to show that this part of the stage is “heavenly.” The set for Bethlehem may be fairly spare, but will require at least two “inns” for Joseph to try to find room at, as well as a traditional stable/manger. COSTUMES: Traditional angel robes for the angels, including halos and wings. Since heaven is presented in a non-traditional way, if robes are unavailable, the angels—especially Gabriel and Uriel—may wear white street clothes or business attire. Costumes for the Bethlehem characters should be traditional: Bedouin-style for Joseph, Mary, Innkeeper, Innkeeper’s Wife, and shepherds Ezra and Jethro, and exotic “wise men” attire for the Magi. PROPS Cell phones to serve as “H-phones” for select angels A small prop harp A water bottle covered in strips of brown paper for an authentic look A sign reading “Heaven’s Got Talent” A Christmas tree or electric Christmas star Papers for Clarence, Ariel, and Angelica to read their descriptions of Jesus (scene 5) Doll for baby Jesus Magi gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh Two shepherd staffs This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 4 HEAVEN'S GOT TALENT MUSIC & SOUND CUES Harp music for entrance of Gabriel and Uriel and entrance of angels in last scene. Angel bells for Clarence in scene 4. Faux television theme music. Cell phone ringtone. Clip-clop sound for Magi entry. Sheep bells for re-enactment by the shepherds. Accompaniment for “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing.” SCRIPTURE: Luke 2: 8-20, KJV. This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. BRIAN YAPKO 5 1 SCENE 1 2 Heaven 3 4 ANGEL ANNOUNCER: (Offstage in the dark.) Attention, all angels. 5 Attention, angels. Please report to the Angelic Fellowship Hall 6 immediately for an important announcement. That is all. 7 8 ANGELS gather onto the elevated section of the stage, which will 9 serve as the Angelic Fellowship Hall. As they gather, things are said 10 like, “Hey, Ariel!” “Hey, Michael!” “New halo?” While ANGELS are 11 mulling around, CLARENCE wanders in looking confused. 12 13 CLARENCE: Why is everyone here? Did I miss something? 14 ARIEL: Didn’t you hear? Gabriel and Uriel are going to make a big 15 announcement. 16 CLARENCE: Right on! (He high-fives her and takes out his H- 17 phone to text a friend.) 18 19 The ANGELS are excited about the announcement. What could it 20 be? Some chat. Some text on their H-phones. One says a little too 21 loudly, “I got a text saying, ‘Meet me at the Pearly Gates!’ ” During 22 the hubbub, a young angel, ANGELICA, walks in and introduces 23 herself. 24 25 ANGELICA: Hi, everybody. I’m new here. 26 27 Some of the ANGELS are focused on their H-phones and ignore 28 her, but MICHAEL, an older angel, greets her enthusiastically. 29 30 MICHAEL: Welcome to heaven! I’m Michael. What’s your name? 31 ANGELICA: (Sadly.) I don’t have one yet. 32 MICHAEL: I see. Well, let’s call you Angelica until the big Boss 33 gives you your name. Hey, everybody! This is Angelica. She’s 34 new. 35 ANGELS: (Ad-lib) Hey! Welcome, Angelica! Nice to meet you! 36 (Etc.) 37 MICHAEL: Come on, Clarence. Off the phone, and greet heaven’s 38 newest angel. This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 6 HEAVEN'S GOT TALENT 1 CLARENCE: Hey. 2 ANGELICA: Hey. 3 MURIEL: (A motherly angel.) Greetings, my dear. I’m Muriel. I’ll 4 help you get the hang of things. 5 6 ANGELICA sees many of the ANGELS return to their H-Phones. 7 8 ANGELICA: I didn’t know that angels had cell phones! 9 MICHAEL: Pffft. I wish they’d never been invented. Angels don’t 10 talk with each other the way they used to! (He walks away.) 11 MURIEL: (With a little laugh.) Oh my dear, they’re not cell phones, 12 like on earth. These are H-phones. “H” for heaven. 13 ANGELICA: Oh! Do angels Tweet? 14 MURIEL: (Points to one of the ANGELS.) Angels don’t use Twitter, 15 dear. We play the harp. 16 17 Harp music plays as GABRIEL and URIEL enter. All the ANGELS 18 snap to attention. 19 20 ANGELICA: (Whispering to MURIEL.) Who are they? 21 MURIEL: That’s Gabriel and Uriel—archangels who help oversee 22 things here in heaven. And every so often they go to earth to 23 make announcements to the human children of God who live 24 there. 25 GABRIEL: My fellow angels, Uriel and I are pleased to announce 26 a miracle unprecedented in the history of the world. We are 27 going to witness the birth that has for so long been foretold! 28 URIEL: (To GABRIEL, bursting with excitement.) Can I tell them? 29 GABRIEL: Go ahead. 30 URIEL: Angels! In less than one earth day, we are finally going to 31 see the birth of the blessed one, Jesus Christ! 32 VARIOUS ANGELS: (Ecstatic, cheering. Ad-lib.) At last! Finally! 33 Why didn’t you tell us before?! 34 MICHAEL: We need to get ready! What should we do? 35 ARIEL: I need to get my wings done! 36 URIEL: No, Ariel—this has nothing to do with vanity. This is about 37 God’s love for all of creation, and especially for the children of 38 Adam and Eve, who have waited centuries for this day.