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Coparenting: Risk and Protective Factors

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Coparenting: Risk and Protective Factors Coparenting: Risk and protective factors EMILY H. BECHER, PHD Applied Research and Evaluation Specialist Center for family Development University of Minnesota Extension September 12th, 2019 1 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. WHO AM I? 2 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. OVERVIEW ▪ What is coparenting ▪ How does coparenting reduce parent stress ▪ How reduced parent stress increases parent- related protective factors, and reduces parent- related risk factors for children ▪ What types of educational prevention programs can support coparenting and what should those programs include 3 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. WHO HERE HAS EVER CARED FOR A CHILD IN ANY CAPACITY? 4 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. SO YOU KNOW…. ▪ Children are wonderful ▪ Children are stressful ▪ Caring for a child well takes a large amount of a variety of resources 5 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. “A PROBLEM SHARED IS A PROBLEM HALVED” ▪ Not that my children are ever problems!! (or at least don’t tell them that) ▪ Coparenting at its simplest is the shared work of caregiving ▪ And the idea is that it’s a good thing because…. 6 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. COPARENTING IS POSITIVE FOR PARENTS (WHEN ITS WORKING WELL) ▪ Because you have people to share the load of caregiving with – $ – Changing diapers, getting kids to and from school, preparing food, cleaning – Supporting kids emotionally and having positive 1:1 relationships with them – Staying with them on out of school days – And lots more examples! 7 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. PARENTS CAN ACT AS A PROTECTIVE AND AS A RISK FACTOR FOR CHILDREN 8 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. ▪ When parents are stressed, their parenting is at risk for declining and at greater risk for engaging in behaviors like harsh discipline practices and less positive parenting/less engaged parenting ▪ Supportive coparenting practices can reduce the risk of parents engaging in harsh parenting practices through the mechanism of reducing parenting stress (Choi & Becher, 2019) 9 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. ▪ Supportive coparenting can increase the odds of positive outcomes for children through the mechanisms of reducing the risk of maternal depression and parental stress (Cabrera et al., 2012; Mallette et al., 2019; Wood, Miller, & Lehman, 2015) 10 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. A NOTE ABOUT INTIMATE PARTNER VIOLENCE ▪ Under no circumstances should a person who was victimized by their former partner be pressured into engaging in a coparenting relationship with their perpetrator ▪ Victims need alternate support systems and referrals in order to ensure that structures designed to support healthy coparenting aren’t actually forcing them to be victimized (Hardesty et al., 2017) 11 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. THINK ABOUT COPARENTING AS WRESTLING ON TV ▪ Parenting is hard ▪ You are tired and stressed and overwhelmed ▪ Bad things happen to kids when parents are too stressed (I’ll talk more about this) ▪ Your coparent(s) are there when you need to tap out and then you’re there to get back in the ring when they need you 12 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. BUT THAT IMPLIES THAT YOU AND YOUR COPARENT(S) ARE ON THE SAME TEAM RIGHT? ▪ And this is the problem ▪ Because often coparenting is tangled up with our other relationships with a person ▪ A person is not just our coparent, they are the ex partner who I really don’t like OR maybe never really knew that well 13 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. SO THIS THE CHALLENGE ▪ How can we support parents and coparents to disentangle their other relationships with each other, from the shared work of caregiving, so that everyone can “share the load” and in turn, provide a child and children with access to greater resources and less stressed parents who are able to make better parenting decisions? 14 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. COPARENTING CAN BE…. ▪ Dyadic meaning 2 parents ▪ Polyadic meaning as many caregivers are engaging in this work ▪ While I’ll use mostly dyadic terms, I think many of the principles apply to polyadic coparenting, we just don’t have as much research about what that looks like because of its complexity (Burton & Hardaway, 2012) 15 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. COPARENTING IS ABOUT SHARED WORK BUT IT IS BASED ON A RELATIONSHIP ▪ A healthy coparenting relationship is characterized by an understanding that the other coparent is important to a child ▪ Support (in whatever form that looks like) for your coparent in order for them to engage in parenting and coparenting to the best of their capacity ▪ Feeling supported by your coparent to be a high quality parent and coparent 16 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. EXPECTATIONS AROUND COPARENTING HAVE CHANGED AS SOCIETY HAS CHANGED ▪ We have more children with parents who are not in a current romantic/intimate relationship ▪ Presumed joint custody is now the norm ▪ So we have more parents who have to figure out what this coparenting thing is separate from their now ended intimate relationship (but even parents in an intimate relationship have to figure this out) 17 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. SO HOW DO WE SUPPORT COPARENTING? ▪ Supporting legal proceses that assume parents will be in a continued relationship ▪ Providing education specifically targeted at supporting health coparenting, otherwise known as divorce education or coparenting education, ideally connected to any legal processes outlining their parenting arrangments 18 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. WHICH PARENTS COULD BENEFIT MOST FROM INTERVENTION? ▪ Younger coparents who are unmarried and who did not have a longterm commitment at the time of their child's birth are often at greatest risk of weaker coparenting relationships ▪ Weaker coparenting are often associated with reduced father involvement over time (Waller & Emory, 2014) 19 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. SOME EXAMPLES OF PROMISING PROGRAMS ▪ Coparent Court ▪ Supporting Father Involvement Program ▪ Divorce education 20 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. DIVORCE EDUCATION ▪ Almost every state has at least one county where divorce education is mandated ▪ Better programs, that focus on key risk and protective factors, have some evidence of success in promoting healthy coparenting in divorcing parents (Fackrell, Hawkins, & Kay, 2011) ▪ Does your state mandate divorce education for divorcing programs and if so, which programs? This can be a source of disparity as often it’s the trigger of divorce that sets off the mandate (and what happens to unmarried coparents?) 21 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. COPARENT COURT ▪ Problem solving court for unmarried coparents referred through the child support system ▪ Coparent education classes taught by community educators ▪ Case management and wrap around support services (Marczak et al., 2015a; Marczak et al., 2015b, Ruhland et al., 2016) 22 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. SUPPORTING FATHER INVOLVEMENT PROGRAM ▪ 16 week preventive group-based intervention for coparents still in an intimate relationship but identified as at risk by child welfare systems ▪ 5 topic areas: individual stress and wellbeing, couple and coparent relationship patterns, multigenerational patterns, parenting, stressors and social support 23 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. SUPPORTING FATHER INVOLVEMENT PROGRAM ▪ The intervention seems to be most helpful for high conflict couples ▪ Did not seem particularly helpful for low or middle conflict couples ▪ Replicated in a variety of different communities and samples of parents (Epstein et al., 2015) 24 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. A MODEL OF CASCADING RESILIENCE ▪ Parent education programs can create cascading ripples of resilience – For example, I learn a new parenting strategy. I try it with my child and they respond positively. My self-esteem and self-efficacy is boosted. I reach out to a support system because of this increased emotional capacity…and so on (Doty et al., 2017) 25 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. FINAL PLUG! ▪ Connect with your local land-grant Extension system and find out what parent and youth and community education programs they offer FOR FREE and how you can partner with them to get education to the communities and families that would benefit the most from it ▪ https://nifa.usda.gov/land-grant-colleges- and-universities-partner-website-directory 26 © 2019 Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. REFERENCES ▪ Burton, L.M., & Hardaway, C.R.. (2012). Low-Income Mothers as “Othermothers” to Their Romantic Partners’ Children: Women’s Coparenting in Multiple Partner Fertility Relationships. Family Process, 51, 343-359. ▪ Choi, J., & Becher, E.H. (2019). Supportive Coparenting, Parenting Stress, Harsh Parenting, and Child Behavior Problems in
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