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It doesn’t feel very Christmasy to me. I’m not even about it, but I’m in a bad mood there, too. Of all sure if that’s how you spell Christmasy, or if that’s the people to let me down, it was the Marines. really even a word. Maybe it’s because 2009 has Not the local Marine vets. They’ve been great. I been such a spectacular turd of a year. It seems expect nothing less. But the big cities around us like everyone is broke. Everyone is in a bad mood where actual Marines run the program. I get the or everyone is dying. I don’t even want to remem- feeling they look at the Toys program like they just ber how many of my friends all lost our dads in pulled kitchen duty. I offered huge loads of ex- the last year. While Dubuque has weathered the cess books and toys to the Quad Cities, who said financial fallout fairly well, it seems like the bah- they wanted them. Three weeks and a half-dozen humbug mood that comes with the fallout has still phone calls and e-mails later, they say they don’t managed to settle over our little town. Or maybe have to time or people to come to Dubuque to I’m just watching too much news. I’m not sure if get the six pallets of free stuff. That’s a three-hour people are in a bad mood or if there is just mass round trip folks. Oh, but if I want to bring the toys stupidity sweeping the nation. to them, they’ll take them. Gee, don’t strain your- selves, guys. So I offered it to Madison. They were I think Democrats could serve up free healthcare enthusiastic about coming to get them. But then that magically cost no one anything ever and Re- they never called back and have not returned my publicans would still oppose it just because they calls since. At least they answered the phone the hate Democrats so much. And Democrats con- first time. Des Moines wouldn’t even return my versely would pass a bill that actually does have initial call. So that’ll break your faith a little. Thank death panels just to stick it to the Republicans. goodness the civilians in the area who seems to And through it all, am I the only one who feels actually want to run the program are here. They like it’s pretty obvious that big business is pulling practically jumped at the offer for free toys. Now, the strings on the whole thing? I’m pretty much a Christmas is a couple days away and I still have six hardcore liberal. I admit that and I’m okay with pallets of toys that aren’t going anywhere thanks it. But I like John McCain. I have even voted for to some kind of mass apathy. That’s sad. And yes, quite a few Republicans in my day. I can admit I hope they do read this. I’m not a Marine, but my that, too. Why is it that Republicans are so ada- dad was and I was raised in a Marine household mant that Sarah Palin is not a completely embar- where you said “sir” and kept your shoes tied. I’m rassing joke? I’ve known plenty of empty-headed pretty sure dad would call it “piss-poor.” Democrats to say that nobody’s perfect. Why hang onto this battle, of all battles? It’s like watching a Wow, Bryce got up on the wrong side of the bed car accident. You got better horses. Ride ‘em. And today. Nope, I’m fine. I brush it off and go about while my team has the ball with a quarterback I my business. But unlike your average Joe, I have still like, we have to have a JV team around him. access to this column every two weeks to exact Or so it feels. Why am I uninspired by Nancy Pe- my revenge and point out stupidity when I see it. losi and Harry Reid? And who can take Barney So I can blow off my steam and try to keep acting Frank seriously with that voice? I guess at least I nice, even if I don’t feel like it. can say that Keith Olbermann and Jon Stewart are upfront about being raving liberals. FOX News is Last week I had a phone call from the 773 area still trying to claim to be Fair and Balanced, which code (Chicago), but they were living in Dubuque just makes it look ridiculous. I think if they would now looking for toys. I explained I didn’t do the say, “Yeah, we bash the left and we’re proud of it,” toy giveaway, I just give toys to the groups that people would give them reputation points. give them away, and the deadline had passed. But I bent the rules and got them helped by one of Enough politics. I saw today that someone glued a my recipient groups after the sign-up deadline has cat to a highway in Minnesota, a baby was eating passed. Wouldn’t you know, it wasn’t ten minutes drugs the babysitter left on a coffee table and they later I mysteriously got another call from a 773 stole the sign from the entrance to Auschwitz this number looking for the same thing, but they had week. At least they caught those guys. And locally, no knowledge of the first caller. Right, sure you some genius thought it would be fun to pour a can don’t. No good deed... of pop into the giant Toys For Tots collection bin at Kennedy Mall last weekend. I can’t even fathom I made one last-ditch effort for some karma. I got a what would make a person do that. It’s not cruel long, sad e-mail from a lady in Waukon a few days like gluing a cat to the road, or disrespectful to ago. Yes, Waukon. Nowhere near here. But they an entire race of people like the Auschwitz thing, don’t have Toys for Tots in their area. I checked. but come on. I hope you read this because you And it’s not worth the drive in gas cost to get here are human trash. It’s like watching teenagers these to be part of a gift program, so I had to tell her I days finish their drink and just drop the fast food couldn’t help her. She was disappointed but she cup on the ground and keep walking. I’m turning understood. This was a day before I let the Chi- into a curmudgeon, but it wasn’t that long ago that cago (773’ers) sneak around the system. For some I was in high school and I knew what a trash can reason she stuck in my head. So last Friday I put was and how to use it. What happened? I watched some toys and books in a box for her 8-year-old a person open their car door and dump a full ash- daughter and dropped it in the mail. She should tray out in a parking lot. Does that not even phase get it just in time for Christmas. I’m pretty sure at these people? I wanted to go pee in his window least that one will achieve its desired effect. and see how he felt about it, but I had just gone ... and he was huge. I’m losing faith here. But don’t you go asking for a box in the mail. That cost me $10 to mail and I’m broke. Hrumph! The 365ink crew... faces you already know! I just finished Toys For Tots. I should feel good Tim Mike Kristina Jeff Kelli Ralph Oliver Matt Lisa Chris Pam Jon Ben Ron Bob Roy Brad Bryce Issue #98 _____________________The Inkwell Publisher: Bryce Parks ([email protected]) DECEMBER 23 - JAN 6 Editor: Tim Brechlin ([email protected]) Advertising: Kelli Kerrigan ([email protected]) In this Issue: 563-451-9365 Kate Lydon StreetJaw 4 ([email protected]) The Word on the Street 515-441-6754 Writers & Content: Community Shorts 5 Mike Ironside ([email protected]) Heroes of the Tri-States Tim Brechlin, Bryce Parks, L.A. Library Movie Events Hammer, Chris Wand, Mayor Roy Warehouse Art Gallery Buol, Matt Booth, Bob Gelms, Pam Kress-Dunn, Jeff Stiles, Me- YMCA New Year gan Dalsing and Pat Fisher. Audobon Bird Count Designers: Shalom Kristina Nesteby 365 Pop Quiz 6 ([email protected]) Bryce, Tim & Mike New Year’s Eve 6 Photography: Reflections in the Park 7 Mike Ironside, Ron Tigges, Bryce Parks New Year Cont’d 8 Layout: Inspirit Institute 9 Tim Brechlin, Bryce Parks Director of Operations: Pam Kress-Dunn 11 Patricia Reisen-Ottavi, J.D. Wando’s Movies 12 Community, Incorporated Brad Parks, C.E.O. OTLAG Opening 13 Ralph Kluseman Mindframe Movies 13 Special thank you to: Brad Parks, Fran Parks, Christy Monk, Women On Fire 14 Katy Brechlin, Kay Kluseman, Todd Locher, Everett Buckardt, Julie Steffen, Diamond Jo Events 15 Sheila Castaneda, Ron & Jennifer Tigg- es, bacon, the crew of Radio Dubuque and all the 365 friends and advertisers Budweiser Nightlife 16-17 for all your support. You are all 365. Inspirit Cont’d 18 Dubuque365 / 365ink Women on Fire Cont’d 19 401 Locust Street, Dubuque, IA, 52001 Bob’s Book Reviews 22 dubuque365.com Mattitude 23 (563) 588-4365 All contents (c) 2009, Community, Incor- LifeStiles 24 porated.