Why Dungeon World is Shit are retarded. The "Charming and Open" thing, where someone basically HAS to answer truthfully, from a basic list of specific questions like "whom 1. The abilities... what the fuck? You don't roll for them, you just assign do you serve" and "what do you most desire". So if you're questioning some the exact same fucking numbers. No point buy that I can see. The modifiers faggot you captured, all that shit where you have to intimidate him or are also shit. It's trying to copy D&D when in fact there is no reason to. something, that's taken from the GM's control. The bard doesn't even have There is no reason for abilities to range 3-18, when the modifiers range -3 to to roll for that shit, he can just basically use Zone of Truth at will. For no +3. It's just trying to make itself look like AD&D. For that, fuck it right off roll. Or cost. I could go through all the classes and whine about each one, the bat. It's showing that it is 90% nostalgia-based, except there are plenty but this shit is gonna be long enough, so I won't. Trust me, it doesn't get of games that do AD&D nostalgia far better than it does. much better.

2. Retarded core mechanic. Okay, we can all agree that margins of success 8. Bonds. People fucking FELLATE Dungeon World's "bonds". Except is it and failure are important. People have been doing it in D&D for years ... really that creative? No. Again, no choices. It's a fucking fill-in-the-blank assuming you had a good DM who actually read the Dungeon Master's that basically puts stuff out there about your character without you having Guide and saw that advice, in just about every fucking edition. That's fine. any choice. For example "This is not my first adventure with ______" .... But every monster and creature has literally the same exact Armor Class. well, what if I've never fucking met any of them before? What if they Ranged, and melee. Ranged I could see (Savage Worlds does it that way), rescued me out of a Dungeon? Oh, and, I sang stories of some guy long but melee? Really? I can't be more skilled at parrying and getting hit less before I ever met them? The fuck? Are we starting as novice adventurers often? Oh but that leads into the next shit bit. here? This is a nice try to make people think out their characters' relationship, but other games do it, too. And they do it better. If you want to 3. "Moves." I put them in quotes because it makes them sound more like a have a rule for something like this, fine, but don't make fucking roleplaying shitty wuxia karate movie; which is basically what Dungeon World is trying decisions FOR my character before I've even finished making him. to be. I can see quite clearly how this game came about: some guys were playing D&D, and one guy decided to jump across a table trying to get a 9. The naming of EVERYTHING. Your DM's "agenda" is just basic bonus to hit some guy, or swing off a chandelier, or run up a dragon's back fucking DM shit. You didn't need to give that a name. And the DM section to get impromptu flanking on it, or some other shit. Then he rolled a nat20 just pisses the fuck out of me. "Dungeon World adventures *never* (or just succeeded normally) and the DM let him do it, and he felt bad-ass. presume a player actions." heh..... Okay. It just limits them to about 5 - 6 Then he decided to make an entire game ALL ABOUT THAT. basic skill check-thingies that limit their imagination. Which, ironically, is the OPPOSITE of what Dungeon World tries to do. People complain about 4. "Moves" continued: Basically the entire thing is like D&D 4e, where games like D&D 3.5 and Palladium and GURPS for their massive skill lists you just fucking "do" shit. "I USE THUNDERING STEP, and how the DM tries to make everything a skill check and thus limits 2W+STRENGTH DAMAGE PLUS 5 ONGOING, SAVE ENDS, PLUS I players imagination. That's a fair point. But at least it doesn't make SHIFT 4 SQUARES AT MAKE A SECONDARY ATTACK." Literally. The everything you do a "move." What if I stand completely still, Dungeon fact that regular actions are considered "basic moves" (and marginal World, and try to use my fucking "discern realties" on a boring-ass pole? missing just provokes a counterattack, which might be a cool mechanic for Might be nothing there, but if I roll a fucking 10+, the GM is entitled to tell something like charging) just *screams* D&D 4th. MUH POWAHS. But me this boring-ass pole's secret history, or some shit. And if the GM refuses even a powers system can be okay if you're trying to make a DOTA 2 RPG. the players whine and bitch and point to the dice "but I rolled the number i Let's continue... need to succeed." In D&D the DM can say "well, you didn't quite make the DC, sorry". Same in many other systems. Not Dungeon World. Also, I note 5. The fucking static target number.... how goddamn hard is it to basic there's margins of success in the negative sense (you succeed, but...) but no math? If you're a hipster trying out RPGs to be "ironic" for your fucking exceptional success. What if you get boxcars, or roll 12+ or 14+ total? blog, and can't even put the effort in, then fuck off! No one wants to make Nothing *extra* special happens? For a game of heroic fantasy, so far it's tabletop games more inclusive except absolute losers who can't find anyone seeming pretty boring. to play with, and I'll gladly take them under my wing to spare them the agony of playing with insincere assholes. I mean, come on. Parleying with 10. Moves move moves.... fucking hell I thought it would go away but I the fucking king has the same target number as "parleying" with a keep having to come back to it, rereading this PDF for the first time in six commoner for bread? (Also why do they need a fucking special name for months (the first time I almost puked). "Never tell the players what move every "basic move", for shits sake. It LITERALLY starts to be like a you are making" "Dungeon Moves" .... just .... fucking .... give .... DM .... computer game, limiting you on what "moves" you can do. "Discern advice. It's NOT that hard. Not everything has to be a goddamn realities" instead of just fucking Perception, or study the area? Really? I'd cockslurping move. What the fuck does that even mean? Just something rather die before narrating my character as "I use discern realities on the you're doing in the game? That's just something you're doing in the game! It dead body" like a fucking idiot, instead of just "I look at the dead body, to doesn't need a fucking name like it's a specialized thing. And to be honest, I see if I can figure anything out." But it doesn't matter if this guy was killed cannot see what it adds. I really cannot. What does the concept of "moves" by a master sniper who left no trace, or a pissed off garbage man who left being tacked onto EVERYTHING, add to the game at all? his fucking ID card behind, because the Difficulty Class, or Target Number, or whatever, is EXACTLY THE FUCKING SAME. 11. Fronts....another POINTLESS term. It does not need to be a term. It 6. The sheer number of shitty basic moves. The whole "outstanding adds nothing, and just makes me read further to see what the fuck they are Warrants" thing... well what if the characters are fucking privateers talking about. They are creating mechanics where none need to be there. sponsored by the local sheriff to kill shit? You can mention it in the GM Actually, they AREN'T creating mechanics, they are creating extra names advice section, "Characters might get in trouble for fighting shit without for things where NONE ARE NEEDED. permission." But don't... just don't. Making a mechanic for EVERYTHING... yeah, it could be cool. Carousing looks pretty interesting. 12. Monster Tags. Okay, so this is where it devolves into true Kike-starter / But it's NOT up to the fucking player whether or not they meet a useful hipster shit. Tags? Really? They showed in D&D Next, too, apparently, for NPC. It's up to the GAME MASTER. That's the problem with putting the the monsters in there. SUBTYPES . THE "ORC" IN "HUMANOID (ORC)" Target Number in the PC's hands every time. Because when they fail, they IS A SUBTYPE . NOT A FUCKING "TAG". GET THE FUCK OFF know you did it, and they start whining. TWITTER. I know accusing "hipster" is a meaningless term now, but you know who I mean. Fucking Big Bang Theory twats, or Chris Hardwick on 7. The classes. Holy shit I have not gotten 20 pages into this PDF yet, and that fucking Talking Dead show, the kind of pretty-faced faggot in a sweater already I've all but had it. So not only are there racial restrictions (can only constantly reading off inane tweets about whether Rick will rape the play elven or human bard, nothing else can be a bard), but the bard "moves" Governor in the next episode. But the mechanics of RPGs have been dumbed down brutally, because entitled people join them and put ZERO something cool happens. A commander rides his burning tank into a effort into learning, so we have to sink to their level. DUNGEON WORLD building and collapses it on an enemy squad, killing them. Then he is the NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND of roleplaying games. And it doesn't someone survives, and kills the rest in hand to hand combat. HIGHLY even do THAT well. It tries to be simple, while introducing fucking terms UNLIKELY in real life. Or in a roleplaying game, if he wasn't "heroic". But for EVERYTHING that a regular RPG assumes is common sense (and it is, in Dungeon World, you can just DO that, because there are no rules. It's by the way. you don't need to call the players' enemies a "front" for fuck's just, try to do something, and if you get 10 or higher, you did it. “Cool”. sake). I'm not insulting rules-lite games AT ALL. Let me make that clear. Games 13. Okay, so maybe I shit on the monster tags a bit TOO much. They are a like FATE and RISUS, while not really to my liking, are quite good to get sort of nice idea... for flavor... and GM advice how to run it. Except there is people into the hobby -- or just as a one-shot type thing, or for "deep- NOTHING ELSE TO THEM. immersion storytelling" role playing.

Now, before I go any farther, let me say; I am big fan of the one line of stats Dungeon World stands in the middle; too much complexity to be truly-rules- that AD&D monsters had. Simple. Their HD, move, morale, #attacks, lite, but not enough actual rules to be a real game. And it's not even #appearing, that sort of shit. Yet these monsters have like, an attack, and complexity, it's just stupidity. It's tacking names and specialized terms to some HP, and some armor. That's it. The special abilities are not a problem, already-estabilished RPG tropes in an effort to be a specshul snowflake, but there's no rules for how to handle them. It's all up to the GM fiat. Which when it soooo isn't. Sorry, Dungeon World. You are merely a testament to why Dungeon World is fucking BACKWARDS. It makes rules where what a gyp Kikestarter is, and an insult to AD&D and all other editions that NONE are needed, for stuff like GM advice and basic actions, yet leaves the came after it. Wizards should sue you for using its stats. It really should. rest of the combat up to the DM to the point where it's almost freeform RP. As a last note, I do find it FASCINATING that they released If there's ANYWHERE you need SOMEWHAT detailed rules, it's combat, SUPPLEMENTS for this. As though their fantastic idea deserved new where the characters' fate is decided in 90% of RPG campaigns. And I'm classes with retarded-ass powers. Just make up your own! Isn't that the sure not saying that complex rules for every little thing is good. Not at all. point of rules-lite, so you can homebrew easily? Nope, it's so you can spend But absolutely NO detail on how fast a winged creature can move, relative more money on classes that you probably could have made better yourself. to others, or anything... this is literally an RPG for retards. Not children, Essentially a tax on stupidity, which I fully support, but please don't push it children are intelligent. At age 13 was when my friends would DM complex into my face as if it has any real quality to speak of, or offer. D&D campaigns for us. Why? Because they GENUINELY cared about the fucking game, and wanted to play it. It was cool. They put EFFORT into learning the rules. And they weren't even that damned hard to learn! But To sum up the shittiest parts (a “TL:DR” if you will): Dungeon World is for bringing people into the mix. Which is fine, to start them on something rules light, but Dungeon World teaches MULTIPLE 1. Static target number means it's as easily to shoot a mosquito as it is to shitty habits: shoot an elephant. Or as easy to land a blow on a master swordsman as it is to land a blow on a commoner. This tiny amount of complexity is 1. Everything in an RPG is a "move". Don't think outside the box, don't apparently too much for the brain-damaged people who play the game. explore organically, just roll your fucking "discern realities" every 5 feet to 2. Abilities ripped off of D&D, with unnecessary modifier system (save find traps and shit. for the dry leveling system). Obviously attempting to cash in on AD&D nostalgia without doing the requisite homework. 2. You know what's going to happen. If you roll a 10, you succeed. if the 3. Bonds forces you to have known the characters before, and to be the DM says you don't succeed, he's wrong, cause "it says so in the rules." A 10 “butt of jokes” from one of them. Uncreative roleplaying mechanics on ANYTHING succeeds. The only way to change that is for the GM to shoved in there for people to ooh and ahh over, when they are just give a shitload of penalties whenever something difficult happens. badly-done formalizations of suggestions from games for years. 4. Lack of Choice: The game seems to like making a lot of choices for 3. “Awesome” things constantly happen (then become the norm after 2-3 you. Like whether you can be an dwarven bard (you can't). Or what sessions). No, they don't. A lot of times you will just fight shit, and it will you can do. If it's not a basic move, Dungeon World suggests you make die. if you try to do something creative, more power to you, and a good DM it into one. Instead of, you know, improvising. will give you a bonus to hit as a reward if you pull it off. But it's not easy. 5. No Substance : Like D&D 4e, you get to pick an ability from a list, and It's not easy to fucking bullrush a dragon, or some shit. But in Dungeon THAT'S one of your abilities. There's basically nothing else to World, if you try that, and roll a 10, GUESS WHAT? YOU DID IT! character customization, other than filling the blanks on bonds with the HOORAY! NICE JOB DOING SOMETHING EPIC IN A GAME WITH other PCs, and deciding how to order your 16, 15, 14, etc.. array with ZERO RIGOR! Because when “cool” things happen constantly, they some modicum of creativity. But you can't anyway, cause you need to become less and less memorable as the bar is raised for what constitutes put your best stat for your class. You can't even roll for your stats, “cool.” Thus, rather than being an RPG with 1-2 memorable things a according to this game (say it with me: everyone is equal) which was session, Dungeon World quickly escalates into a wu-xia mush that smells of the entire point of the 3-18 ability scores in the first place (and the a bad karate movie. modifiers system, though that came later). 6. Monster Tags: In addition to living in the niche of shitty game that Because that's a lot of the fun of other RPG systems. They try to be can't decide if it wants to be rules-lite or rules-heavy, Dungeon World "realistic". They AREN'T, it's an illusion, and an effective one, but people shows that the niche it's really gunning for is twitter, by giving will shit on it with "wew it's a wurld of dwagons and gobbins, why argue monsters “tags”. At least be honest, and put a hash-tag there, Dungeon over wealism??" World. 7. Conclusion: The saddest part is, not simply that Dungeon World Except the basics of versimilitude spit on that. Just because dragons exist, exists, but that that it is foisting new players on a community that and characters are heroic fantasy, doesn't mean the world needs to be simply doesn't need them, and training them to be bad RPG players unbelievable. Like in D&D if someone 20th level falls 300 feet and survive right from the get-go; entitled, not respecting of GM fiat, and thinking the huge damage because he has enough hit points. How does it logically they can do whatever the hell they want and succeed... as long as they follow that just because there are elves and dragons in this world, he should roll a 10 or higher. survive that fall?

There is a wargame I play with very complex rules. Some (many) would say overcomplex. But what makes it truly fun, in the end, is when