Catchers, Cases and Other Compositions An Anthology of Essays, Poems, and Stories

Composition, Section 146 (Grade 10) Paul D. Schreiber High School September 2011 ‐‐ January 2012 Port Washington, NY

Students: Jessica Altuch, Kahaf Bhuiyan, Sabrina Brennan, Christian Castillo, Bomin Choi, Roxana Diaz, Lauren Donahue, Amanda Ehren, Maggie Golder, Norma Gonzalez, Ezra Hyman, Ahmed Ismail, Henry Lee, Emily Perlman, Adam Rubenstein, Carrie Rybecky, Samara Walsh, Alessandra Verdi, Emily Weinstein, George Weiss

Teacher: Dr. Sara Brock

Table of Contents

Jessica Altuch When Bitten Kahaf Bhuiyan Augmented Sabrina Brennan Holden’s Journey Christian Castillo Phony Modern Teen Bomin Choi Different Faces but Similar Lives Roxana Diaz Dreaming about Loneliness Lauren Donahue All Paul’s Glory Over Amanda Ehren What Oranges Are and Aren’t Maggie Golder Paul’s Darkened Overture James Castle: A Monologue Norma Gonzalez Remembering the Trouble‐Maker Ahmed Ismail Holden: The Universal Teenager Henry Lee Darken Dusk Emily Perlman Hiding Behind the Hat Adam Rubenstein Holden’s Journey Carolyn Rybecky The Path to Success Samara Walsh An Anonymous Trouble‐Maker Ali Verdi Like Mother, Unlike Daughter Three Outsiders Emily Weinstein The Perks of Summer Reading My “Older” Brother: A Monologue by Phoebe Caulfield Weiss, George Two Faces

Cover illustration by Sabrina Brenna.

When Bitten by Jessica Altuch

With great power, there must also come great responsibility. ‐‐ Stan Lee, Amazing Fantasy #15

Spiderman is a famous, fictional, American character, who can be perceived as an outsider in comic books and the movies. How would you respond if your life were to dramatically change overnight? In Peter Parker’s case, a high school teenager was bitten by a genetically modified spider, which changed his life, and gave him spider‐like abilities, which he then uses for the good of the city. He is put to the challenge and has to fight evil because he is now a superhero. Spiderman is an “outsider,” as he is set apart from the world because of his supernatural powers. Peter used to be an average teenager, but his life changed overnight. He is then out every night protecting the city from any evil that may come.

Peter, before he was transformed, was considered your typical teenage boy. He had trouble with his love life, school, family, self‐esteem, and lack of friends. Recently, however, Peter’s character has gotten Hollywood updates. He went from being a shy teenage high school student to a more confident college student to a married high school teacher. Peter’s past has played a large role in shaping his personality and future.

Peter as a child was an orphan who was also bullied by many classmates of his. Peter also has to go through witnessing the death of his Uncle, with whom he is very close. Peter after gaining his powers from the genetically modified spider, wants to get revenge against the people who murdered his uncle. Peter Parker’s life was “normal” until something happened one day; he would be changed for the rest of his life. Peter Parker used to be your average teenager, then his life was totally changed one day when he was on a school field trip, and he was bitten by a genetically‐ altered spider. Peter then realizes that he has gained supernatural powers that next day. These powers allow him to have spider‐like capabilities which makes him an “outsider.”

After being bitten, Peter is no longer considered a “normal” human being. Spiderman wants revenge on the people who killed his uncle. Spiderman isn’t a normal human being anymore; he is a superhero with supernatural powers, which separates him from the city. Peter Parker went from being a normal school boy to fighting for the city against evil. Peter now is Spiderman to the city, and is living a double life, which is tough to balance. Spiderman is now depended on by the city to be protected from crimes being committed within the city. Spiderman is an outsider who is greatly appreciated in the city, to help save the city from evil.

Spiderman is somebody whose life was radically changed overnight, when he learned he has superpowers. On a daily basis he is out saving people and punishing those who have broken the law. He is looked up to highly because he is keeping the city safe and everybody counts on him to save the day. He is separated from society because of his supernatural abilities. Spider man used to be a normal human being, until he was bitten by a spider which changed him from that day on. This

1 spider that bit him gave him powers that were incredible which he then used for good. He helped the city stay safe and to protect the people from any means of harm.

2 Augmented by Kahaf Bhuiyan

I never asked for this. ‐– Adam Jensen in Deus Ex: Human Revolution

Have you ever thought about how your life would be if you had no limbs? Or what if your limbs were replaced with artificial implants with weapons that seem to appear out of thin air, making you a one‐man army? This is what happens to Adam Jensen, the protagonist in the video game Deus Ex: Human Revolution. After he gets attacked by members of the Illuminati, a group of people that say they are trying to make the human race better for everyone. In reality, they are persecuting humans by experimenting on them to find the perfect human to make the perfect cyborg. Adam Jensen happens to be this perfect human, but ends up stopping the experiments instead of helping the Illuminati. The only reason he fights the Illuminati is because they get in the way of him trying to find his girlfriend, Megan Reed. She had gone missing after the Illuminati had attacked Sarif Industries, the place where Jensen works. The most interesting part of the video game is that the entire game can be played without killing anyone, making it possible for Jensen to be a complete pacifist. Adam Jensen is a character from Deus Ex: Human Revolution, who can be seen as an outsider because he is different from many people physically and mentally.

Jensen lives in an apartment in Detroit, in the year 2027. He used to be a former SWAT team member, who quit because he could not find the courage to kill a person who had gone insane and had started harming innocent civilians. After he quit, he took his girlfriend’s advice and joined up with the company she worked for, Sarif Industries, as head of security. Sarif Industries develops cybernetic implants for humans, which are also known as augmentations. These augmentations can be mechanical limbs or a computer chip in the brain, and are intended to make human life easier. Unfortunately for Jensen, on his first day of work, the Illuminati comes and holds everyone hostage, while kidnapping many of the scientists so they can develop their own augmentations to control masses of people. While everyone is being held hostage, Adam Jensen is fatally wounded, and would have died if Sarif Industries had not decided to give him augmentations, replacing his arms and some of his brain, while giving life support to his heart. This essentially makes him into a cyborg, and the irony in this is that most of the people with augmentations willingly get them, unlike Jensen, who “never asked for this” (Deus Ex: Human Revolution).

Many people despise these cyborgs because they do not believe that humans should have their bodies drastically changed like this. This makes Jensen an outsider to “normal” humans, but it could even be said that he is an outsider even to the augmented people, because Jensen was given weapons as some of the augmentations, attempting, and succeeding into making him into a one man army. He is also unlike most other augmented humans because he didn’t have the choice of whether or not to get them.

Jensen has peculiar reasons for doing the things he does, most of them being all just to find out what really happened to his girlfriend, as he does not believe what people say, which is that she was killed on the day of the break‐in. Most people would not be so obsessed about finding one

3 person to the extent that he takes on whole gangs and eventually the master plan of the Illuminati just because he wants to find out the truth. In this way he is an outsider because he has very strong willpower and does not give up, which is the opposite of many people of our generation, and in the game. He tries to do what is best for everyone while on his journey, and helps anyone who looks like they really could need it. At first many people think that someone such as Jensen, who is augmented, would be a jerk and not want to help anyone, but once they get to know him they realize that he is actually a good person, especially considering that he did not want to become augmented. His perspective on things is realistic and bases his assumptions on evidence, such as the fact that there is evidence that Megan Reed is still alive, which causes him to go on his whole journey, asking people “Where is Megan Reed?” (Deus Ex: Human Revolution).

By the end of the game it becomes apparent that even though Jensen can be considered an outsider, he is just like any other person. He has his morals and can even have the choice to not harm anyone in the game at all. The reason he left the SWAT team was because he didn’t think it was right to kill a 15 year old kid was having a breakdown because of augmentations. It cost him his job, because even though he quit, he would have been fired for not following orders. It also cost the job of his co‐worker, Wayne Haas, who had to shoot the kid anyway. The guilt he felt caused him to perform his job poorly, getting him demoted to working behind a desk and eventually losing his job. After Wayne complains to Jensen about this, Jensen gets him a job at Sarif Industries, which Wayne appreciates a lot. If a person is friends with Jensen, they will find that he is a good man and always thinks about others.

Adam Jensen is an outsider because of his appearance and his actions. But underneath all that, it is apparent that he is as normal as anyone else, and to judge him so quickly is not a good idea. After he finds his girlfriend, he is overjoyed since he can finally stop his search, which took him across the globe and took weeks of effort. Jensen is a caring individual and is just like any other person, and his augmentations make him no less of a person that he used to be, especially since it was not his choice.

4 Holden’s Journey by Sabrina Brennan

The whole arrangement is designed for men who at some point or another were looking for something… they thought their own environment couldn’t supply them with. So they gave up looking. They gave up before they even started. ‐‐J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

In today’s society everyone seems to have a clear idea of where they’re going. We all have a set plan of what we have to do: graduate high school, go to college, get a job, get married, have kids and then finally, retire. It’s a plan we’ve stuck to for years, a plan that gives us comfort. We don’t expect any bumps in the road, such as never getting married, never getting a job, or never finishing high school. In the novel, The Catcher and the Rye, the main character Holden, is thrown off course when he’s kicked out of Pencey, an all boy private high school, for failing almost every subject. This isn’t the first time he’s flunked out of a school, it’s actually the fourth. At this point he doesn’t know what path to take. After he leaves Pencey, he goes to New York City, but before he returns home, he goes on a quest to figure out the next step to take in his life.

The first signs of Holden worrying about his future can be seen on page eighty one, when he asks his cabdriver, “Do you happen to know where they [the ducks] go in the wintertime, by any chance?” (Salinger, 81). Now Holden didn’t really care too much about the ducks. This quote has much more to do with Holden wondering where he was going to go in the wintertime. Would a fifth school even let him in with his track record? Is there even any point to going back to school?

Holden’s confusion continues until he goes on a date with Sally Hayes. “Here’s my idea… we could drive up to Massachusetts and Vermont…We’ll stay in these cabin camps till the dough runs out. Then when the dough runs out, I could get a job somewhere with a brook and all and, later on; we could get married or something. I could chop all our own wood in the wintertime and all. Honest to G‐d, we could have a terrific time” (Salinger, 132) Sally rejects Holden’s proposal. Although it was very romantic, it was also very unlikely, because of Holden’s lack of education. Sally thought it would be best if Holden went to college first. This greatly frustrated Holden. He finally had an idea of what he wanted to accomplish and he was actual excited about it, but he was shot down. This causes Holden and Sally to fight, leaving Holden as alone as ever.

When you’re in a situation like Holden’s, it’s always good to have a respected figure in your life to give you helpful advice. When Holden goes to stay with his old teacher, Mr. Antolini, he gets some important advice about what to do next. Mr. Antolini stresses the idea of Holden applying himself in school. “I do say that educated and scholarly men, if they’re brilliant and creative to begin with… tend to leave infinitely more valuable records behind them the men do who are merely brilliant and creative” (Salinger, 189). He explains that people who are educated are more disciplined and finish the projects they start. Although, school doesn’t seem like that big of a deal, the work ethic needed for school can be very helpful to people later in life. Holden continuously says that he’s “so damn tired” which indicates that he’s not fully retaining what Mr. Antolini is saying, which is a shame, because he needs this advice more than anyone.

5

Later on in the novel, Holden plans to run away and leaves his sister, Phoebe, a note telling her his plan. Phoebe does not approve of this and runs after him to tell him she will be joining him. This leads to an argument between the two, which ends with Phoebe in tears. Holden, feeling guilty, takes Phoebe to the zoo to cheer her up. During their outing, they find a carousel, that Phoebe rides multiple times. Watching Phoebe ride the carousel happily without a care in the world gave Holden the push he needed. It’s easy to sit around and complain about not knowing what to do all the time, but the way to make progress is to look on the brighter side of things and find a solution. Holden finally realizes what he’s going to do. When Phoebe gets off the ride she asks Holden if he will be returning home after they left the zoo, his response is, “Yeah,’ I [Holden] said. And I meant it too. I wasn’t lying to her” (Salinger, 212). Later on the story, we learn that Holden goes home and eventually returns to school.

At the end of the novel we learn that Holden is in a hospital while telling this story. He still seems to be rather fragile and anti‐social, but perhaps his time with these doctors will help him grow as a person and lead him to live a better life. Hopefully there he will be able to find the guidance he has been longing for throughout novel. Although it’s not as simple as just going back to school, this is an important step for Holden to take. After all, Holden isn’t that simple of a person.

In the novel The Catcher in the Rye, Holden Caulfield figures out the next step to take after being kicked out of Pencey. He takes time to admit the problem, think of different solutions and look for guidance, but in the end, it’s something as simple as watching his sister be happy that reminds him of what’s important. Sometimes the answers to our problems aren’t as far from home as we think.

6 Phony Modern Teen by Christian Castillo

People are always ruining things for you. ‐‐J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

There has been an ongoing debate about Catcher in the Rye by J.D Salinger and whether Holden, the narrator, has become outdated. Holden often wanders around aimlessly hoping that life will guide him towards happiness. In other words he is a confused teenager who is trying to find his place in the world. This book has been deemed a classic, as many people today could probably relate to Holden as a character. Holden can constantly whine throughout the book, as many modern teens would in his place. To compensate, Holden would try to escape his problems by drinking, smoking and when all else fails, blame others.

Holden doesn’t care much for people, as he constantly complains about his childhood and how his parents are very touchy. He feels restricted in a way, as he tries to avoid his parents or anyone else who tries to boss him around by going to New York. Some teenagers today really want to be independent and seem as if they were an adult when they haven’t reached that level yet just like Holden attempts to. At the end of the book Holden’s sister Phoebe is going on the carousel when she asks Holden “Aren’t you gonna ride, too?” (Salinger, 211). This is when Holden intelligently responds, “Maybe I will next time. I’ll watch ya” (Salinger, 211). This symbolically means that Holden is growing up and being the teenager that he is, he feels he is too old now to ride carousels, but yet to young to stay with the adults. He is still an adolescent and like many teens today, he has trouble being stuck in the middle. This can be a very confusing time, and Holden is no differen t. Holden is fifteen and still clueless of how his future will affect him.

Holden was kicked out of his high school, Pencey. Nevertheless he is still an intelligent teen, just one with little understanding of how to succeed in school. He demonstrates this by being able to “survive” alone without any help for a significant amount of time, while also using his ability to lie to his own advantage. He can comprehend how people work and although he may not always agree with them, Holden can still bring up intelligent conversations and see life beyond the same casual routine. This is very relevant to now because many people are left unsatisfied and feel trapped to living the same daily life for countless years. Holden can also come up with ideas about helping others by being the “catcher” whenever someone is metaphorically falling off the cliff. Holden has displayed some skills in real world except that school was just not right for him. School is not for everyone, including Holden, and many teenagers today feel the same way. Once the idea of being condemned to living a harsh life seems unbearable, some teenagers would come up with ludicrous ideas of leaving that life behind.

Holden wants to “escape” reality and run away to a cabin for the remaining years of his life. During his date with Sally Hayes, he vigorously persuades Sally as he exclaims, “We’ll stay in these cabin camps and stuff like that till the dough runs out, I could get a job somewhere and we could live somewhere with a brook and all and, later on, we could get married or something. I could chop all our own wood in the wintertime and all. Honest to God we could have a terrific time!” (Salinger,

7 132) Teenagers today can see how Holden can sometimes just want to escape from the harsh truth of reality, to a peaceful location where all problems just disappear. When all hope of “running away” is lost, many teenagers try to find alternate solutions such as drinking.

Regardless of Holden’s age, he occasionally drinks alcohol with a side of soda because he is tall, which makes him appear older. Holden is one devious and slick teenager who can obtain drinks without being of age. To be honest many teenagers today can easily get alcohol if they gave some effort, by knowing relatives or friends who are old enough to buy the drinks legally. Holden once said, “Boy, I sat at the goddam bar till around one o’ clock or so, getting drunk as a bastard. I could hardly see straight.” (Salinger, 150) Holden is usually acting like an adult by drinking let alone smoking. Holden smokes cigarettes at times too. Due to drinking and being a high school drop out, things will not become much better for Holden. As time passes Holden can only helplessly think as to why all the negative events have come about, such as him wanting to leave his trapped life, drinking, smoking, and being unemployed. Day after day Holden just sits at bars, talking to strangers reminiscing to himself how phony everyone is.

There are a handful of teenagers who can relate to Holden in various ways, he wanders around seeking for answers to life while finding means of dealing with the stress that comes with being a teenager. While some parts in Holden’s story might not seem relevant, the life of Holden is far from outdated. Overall, Holden can be considered someone peers around his age can relate to today.

8 Different Faces But Similar Lives by Bomin Choi

The motto “it's just me against the world” perfectly relates to Holden Caulfield, the protagonist of The Catcher in the Rye. This motto absolutely describes a complacent young man struggling in his society. On the other hand, in the graphic novel Skim, Kim Cameron faces some hardships in her local high school. Both characters struggle for recognition from others and a better understanding of their own identity. Despite their different backgrounds, Holden and Kim have many similarities that reveal their in common struggles of growing up, including the feeling of loneliness.

Holden and Kim, the main protagonists of the two novels, have contrasting backgrounds. Firstly, their families are very different. Holden’s family appears to be a comfortable family with financial stability. Obviously “wealthy,” Holden’s family supplies him with abundant cash: “I don’t remember exactly how much I had, but I was pretty loaded. My grandmother’d just sent me a wad about a week before. I have this grandmother that’s quite lavish with her dough” (52). On the other hand, Kim seems to not be as financially secure, one of the reasons being that her parents heavily depend on their jobs. In addition, Kim is clearly affected by her parents' separation and her mother's job. She writes in her journal: “My parents fell out of love the year my mother got a job at WRE Publicity. Mom found her job more fulfilling than her marriage” (65).

Another difference between Holden and Kim is their religious background. Although both characters have enrolled in schools with Christian chapels, they have their own personal beliefs. Holden confesses: “I'm sort of an atheist. I like Jesus and all, but I don't care too much for most of the other stuff in the Bible. Take the Disciples, for instance. They annoy the hell out of me, if you want to know the truth” (Salinger, 99). This passage reveals Holden’s opposition towards Christianity, and suggests that he thinks other individuals from the Bible, besides Jesus, are “annoying.” However in Kim’s case, her perspective on Jesus and the Bible are never discussed. Instead, Kim’s fondness for witchcraft is demonstrated throughout the novel: “So I was reading my book yesterday. It said witches believe in reincarnation, but it didn’t say anything about believing in suicide” (Tamaki, 33). Not only is Kim interested in witchcraft, but as a pastime, she explores many spiritual doings: “Lisa and I went to the park after school to channel the spirits, but it started to rain” (Tamaki, 38). Even though Holden and Kim both question their religious traditions, they do so in different ways.

Lastly, yet most importantly, the two characters are set in different time periods. J.D. Salinger, author of The Cather In the Rye first published his book in 1951, setting his character, Holden, to live in the 1940’s. However, Mariko and Jillian Tamaki, wrote Skim in 2008, putting Kim in a more modern society, the 1990’s. The 50 years difference makes the differentiation between Holden and Kim even more pronounced. Overall, both Holden and Kim come from different financial situations, different religious standpoints, and different time periods.

Despite their outward differences, Holden and Kim, in fact, have much in common. This includes their outlook towards school and individual people. Holden and Kim struggle with school

9 and express their lack of interest in academics. In Holden’s situation, he expresses his distaste for school pretty clearly, part of the reason being that he gets kicked out of school quite often: “I got the ax. They give guys the ax quite frequently at Pencey. It has a very good academic rating, Pencey. It really does” (Salinger, 4). Given by his casual tone, it is almost as if Holden has no concern over whether he “gets the ax” or not; he simply does not care. His distaste for Pencey and its students is clearly expressed by his scornful farewell: “Sleep tight, ya morons!” (Salinger, 52). Kim, similarly, shows her lack of enthusiasm towards school like Holden: “My school = goldfish tank of stupid” (Tamaki, 45). This line expresses her contempt for her classmates and for the school itself. Kim even mentions the pointlessness of the English curriculum: “I just think it’s stupid. I mean, you know, that we’re studying all these books… plays… whatever… that everyone studies every year. I mean, they’re not even all that interesting, or like, unique” (Tamaki, 26).

Holden and Kim also tend to be very judgmental of classmates. Holden’s strong dislike towards his peers includes his next door roommate, Ackley: “Besides that, he had a lot of pimples. Not just on his forehead or his chin, like most guys, but all over his whole face. And not only that, he had a terrible personality. He was also sort of a nasty guy” (Salinger, 19). Kim as well has some things to say about her classmates: “If you are ugly, like Natasha Cake who has no eyebrows and doesn’t wash her hair, then you are marked to be treated like crap for life” (Tamaki, 124). Both comments reflect the disgust of Holden and Kim with their own school and classmates. However, the main reason behind their denouncement may come from their own immaturity and narrow‐ mindedness.

Another similarity Holden and Kim share is the inner struggle with depression. The two characters are constantly wandering without a direction. Without direction, Holden and Kim tend to blame abstractions for what makes them feel gloomy, such as money and love. Holden says, “Goddam money. It always ends up making you blue as hell.” (Salinger 15). Simiilarly, Kim writes in her journal, “Things that make me sad: Love” (Tamaki 67). Even though they blame money and love for their sadness, they confess their tendency to become depressed. Kim admits to herself: “Truthfully I am always a little depressed…” (Tamaki, 22). Similarly, Holden says: “I guess it was because I was feeling so damn depressed and lonesome” (Salinger, 153).

The two characters despite their different background also complain about a similar type of loneliness. At a certain point of each of their lives, Holden and Kim definitely state their loneliness; however their loneliness actually results from their own actions and withdrawal from society. Surrounded by family and friends, Holden chooses to stay outside the border: “I remember around 3 o’clock that afternoon I was standing way the hell up on top of Thomas Hill… You could see the whole field from there, and you could see the two teams bashing each other all over the place… practically the whole school except me was there” (Salinger, 2). This quotation demonstrates Holden’s lack of effort to interact with peers. Kim deals with the same inner conflict: “At first I was scared to walk home on my own… But in the end… I decided I’d rather be alone in the dark” (Tamaki, 87). Kim’s acknowledgment of “rather being alone in the dark” reveals her own decision to take the lonelier road. Holden and Kim's basic struggle with loneliness is what generally links the two characters together. By choosing the lonelier road, they eventually become so isolated from the

10 world that they even admit that they are depressed. On the whole, throughout each novel, Holden and Kim ’s self imposed loneliness become more prominent.

Overall, the similarities between the two main protagonists of The Catcher and the Rye and Skim are apparent through much of the narration. Despite their different backgrounds, Holden and Kim, tend to share similar struggles either dealing with individuals, or dealing with their inner loneliness. I personally think that despite anyone's different backgrounds, we all face similar struggles of growing up. This could include loneliness, depression, self acceptance or self discovery. By looking at the bigger picture, we all go through similar conflicts, whether being born in the 19th century, or the 21st century; it's all part of life!

11 Dreaming About Loneliness by Roxana Diaz

I find pe ople confusing. ‐‐Mark Haddon, The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime

Imagine being the only human alive on earth. How would you feel? According to Christopher John Francis Boone when he sleeps he dreams about being the only person alive. It’s his favorite dream. One memorable character that lives as an outsider is Christopher, from The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime by Mark Haddon. Christopher is a fifteen‐year‐old boy who is gifted in math and science. Although nowhere in the novel does Christopher describe himself as being autistic, he sees the ways in which he differs from others.

Christopher is a character who brings back memories of detective characters we read when we were younger. Though this novel is a detective novel, Christopher’s autism makes the novel different from other detective novels. Autism plays a big role in the novel and it’s what makes Christopher an outsider. Christopher hates anything with the color yellow. He must always know when and what time things are happening, which is why he wears his watch everywhere. He avoids social interactions; chatting with people is “pointless” to him. Throughout the novel, Christopher shows a desire for independence and realizes how he differs from the rest.

Christopher is one of those characters the reader expects to grow and develop through the novel. However, sometimes it’s difficult to tell how much he has matured, because of how his thoughts are different from other people’s thoughts. For example, Christopher likes dogs. He sees himself as having transparent moods and as someone who doesn’t lie. He states, “I like dogs. You always know what a dog is thinking. It has four moods. Happy, sad, cross and concentrating. Also, dogs are faithful and they do not tell lies because they cannot talk.” Speaking about dogs, Christopher seems to give straightforward descriptions of himself; he wants people to know he is much like these dogs.

Christopher fantasizes about being the only person alive on earth. He writes, “and when I was asleep I had one of my favorite dreams...and in my dream nearly everyone on earth is dead" Christopher strongly desires to be in a world where only people with his condition are alive. If only people like him remained, he would be a typical teenage boy. He desires to not feel like an outsider. Christopher also mentions how he likes the sound of "white noise” which he describes as "silence but not empty." He likes white noise because it blocks the sound of other things happening in the world. By hearing the sound of others, he knows he exists in the world.

Christopher knows he’s living as an outsider, and eventually he accepts himself. Even when he is at t he train station, he feels as though he’s the only one there. Because of his difficulty with social si t uations, he realizes his dream of being the only human alive is no different than his reality.

12 All Paul’s Glory Over by Lauren Donahue

The carnations in his coat were drooping with cold, he noticed, all th eir red glory over... ‐‐Willa Cather, “Paul’s Case”

Flowers are beautiful and colorful in the beginning, but in time they become old‐looking and not so beautiful. In the story “Paul’s Case” by Willa Cather, there is a lot of symbolism and objects that somehow seem to relate to Paul. The red carnation is an example of an object that can be related to Paul throughout the story. Over time it changes and starts to die and that represents Paul and how his life starts off, and how it ends.

Paul is a troubled kid and very misunderstood by most people. His teachers don’t understand why he misbehaves so much and they even compare him to the carnation. Cather writes, “his teachers felt this afternoon that his whole attitude was symbolized by his shrug and his flippantly red carnation flower, and they fell upon him without mercy, his English teacher leading the pack” (Cather, 198). His teachers dislike his “shrug” and his “flippantly” red carnation flower. They feel he is just like his “flippantly” red carnation flower because he is disrespectful, and does not really care about anything. The only time that Paul does not misbehave is when he is at his job at the th eatre. At the theatre he is well‐behaved and well‐ liked.

The red carnations are the flowers that Paul sees in the show windows. The carnations are sort of similar to Paul because throughout the story they change rapidly just as Paul does. When Paul first sees them they are beautiful and new and healthy, but over time they start to droop and die out. Paul himself notices, “The carnations in his coat were drooping with cold, he noticed; all their red glory over” (Cather, 214). Paul starts to notice that “all his red glory” is over and it is almost as if he is starting to “droop” as well. Paul is very depressed and unhappy with his life. Paul doesn’t really see the point in living his life unhappily and he feels like it will not get better. Paul himself notices, “It was a losing game in the end, and it seemed, this revolt against the homilies by which the world is run” (Cather, 214). Paul knows that his life is not going to get any better and it is almost a “losing game” for him to try and continue his life because he is different then most people and he c an’t continue being different or “revolting against the homilies by which the world is run.”

The carnations can also be seen as foreshadowing for Paul’s suicide. Paul sees that the carnations are dying and it is time to let them go. Cather writes,” It was only one splendid breath they had, in spite of their brave mockery at the winter outside the glass” (Cather, 214). Paul himself starts to feel as if he only has “one splendid breath” left and it starts to become obvious that he is considering committing suicide and ending his life around the same time that the carnations are going to die. He makes a little grave for the carnations. Cather writes, “Paul took one of the blossoms carefully from his coat and scooped a little hole in the snow, where he covered it up” (Cather, 214). While Paul is making a grave for the flowers it is almost as if he is digging his own grave and getting ready for his own death. Once the flowers are in the grave it isn’t long before Paul commits suicide.

13 The red carnations represent Paul throughout the story because they start off lively and beautiful but then they start to get older and become less beautiful. Throughout the story Paul becomes more and more unhappy and sees that the carnations are starting to die. Even though flowers are beautiful and lively, there comes a time when flowers start to die and they don’t seem so beautiful anymore.

14 W hat Oranges Are and Are Not by Amanda Ehren

In the novel Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit by Jeanette Winterson, the main character, Jeanette is torn between the church and her sexuality. As the novel continues, Jeanette starts to realize her attraction to women. Lesbianism completely goes against her mother’s beliefs and the beliefs of the church. In the church these feelings are called “unnatural passions” and they are a sin. Throughout the novel, Jeanette’s mother contradicts the novel’s title by saying that “orange’s are the only fruit,” w hich symbolizes an ongoing problem between Jeanette and her mother.

The title Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit is a huge contradiction in the novel. Oranges represent the dominance of heterosexuality. Jeanette’s mother strictly enforces the idea that oranges are the only fruit. According to the title, which is from Jeanette’s point of view, oranges are not the only fruit. This contradiction between Jeanette and her mother shows that they themselves contradict each other. It is a symbol showing that they will not get along with each other and settle their differences due to Jeanette’s lesbianism. Jeanette doesn’t believe that heterosexuality is dominant while Jeanette’s mother does. Throughout the novel, oranges are forced onto Jeanette by her mother.

Whenever Jeanette is upset, uncomfortable, or uncertain about something, her mother offers her oranges. Winterson writes, “I started to cry. My mother looked horrified and rooting in her handbag she gave me an orange” (Winterson, 26). In this situation, Jeanette becomes “deaf” and her mom doesn’t know how to deal with it since you can’t heal her with the powers of the church. When Jeanette’s mother doesn’t know how to deal with situations, her direct instinct is to give Jeanette an orange, and hope that will make her feel better. This relates to her mother not knowing how to deal with the situation of her being a lesbian. Since the orange represents the dominance of heterosexuality, an orange won’t help in that situation. However, orange fruit isn’t always the symbol for dominance and heterosexuality, the color also is.

At a point in the novel, Jeanette is found talking to an orange demon. Her mother is keeping her locked in this room so she talks to the demon. Jeanette asks, “Demons are evil, aren’t they?” The demon replies, “Not quite, they’re just different.” Jeanette’s mother and the whole church believed that Jeanette is “sinned” and “evil” due to her sexuality. When she asks the orange demon this question, it is also like she is asking herself this question. She is not evil, she is just different from everyone else. So just like the oranges, that understanding could bring a sense of comfort to her‐‐ knowing that she is not evil and sinful, she’s just different and there is nothing wrong with her sexuality. The demon further goes on to explain that “the demon you get depends on the coulour of your aura” (Winterson, 108). The demon is bringing her comfort by telling her that her aura is orange.

In the beginning of the novel, Jeanette’s first love is named Melanie but they were forced to be broken up by the church. One day after church, Jeanette see’s Melanie at a bus stop. Melanie says, “‘Want an orange?’ she offered as we sat close, in a steady silence. She made to peel it. I grabbed her arm. ‘No, don’t do that’” (Winterson, 122). Jeanette’s refusal to Melanie’s orange represents a huge

15 change. After all that she has been through and the constant forcing of oranges on Jeanette by her mother has finally worn off. Jeanette is ready to move on with her life and to try to become a new person. This time in Jeanette’s life is a huge turning point in the novel. Maybe now the constant war between h er and her mother is over. There will be no more need to force oranges onto Jeanette.

According to Jeanette’s mother, lesbianism is a sin. In many parts of the novel, we see how much Jeanette’s mother tries to change her. However, we see no point of change through the novel except when she refuses the orange from Melanie. The symbol of oranges may not only be the fuel to her and mother’s differences, but they could also be the end.

16 Paul’s Darkened Overture by Maggie Golder

It was at the theater and at Carnegie Hall that Paul really lived; the rest was but a sleep and a forgetting. ‐‐ Willa Cather, “Paul’s Case”

The many art forms that exist today offer people means of escape and relief. They allow people to relax, and draw away from their menial and stressful lives. In the short story “Paul’s Case,” written by Willa Cather, Paul is a young man who is greatly drawn to the arts, theater, and a luxurious lifestyle. These new ways of life are revealed to him when he acquires a job as an usher at Carnegie Hall in Pittsburgh. However, because of his exposure to all the performers and personages, he found the menial ways of everyday life revolting and meaningless. As a result of his exposure to the arts, Paul begins to take part in perilous behavior such as dropping out of school, stealing, and running away from home in an attempt to leave his normal, monotonous existence behind.

Paul would often become extremely energetic and euphoric upon entering Carnegie Hall before each performance. He would take on a certain buzz and excitement that at times would cause him to irritate others helping with the show. Paul loved every aspect of the theater, and looking upon the entire world of the arts with rose‐colored glasses. Simply the sights and sounds in the theater were enough to stimulate him. It was as though he couldn’t place what it was, but that something about the sophistication of the arts changed him. Cather states, “It was not that symphonies, as such, meant anything in particular to Paul, but the first sight of the instruments seemed to free some hilarious spirit within him” (Cather, 200). In the outside world his “hilarious spirit” was suppressed. The sights and sounds that existed in the theater were always absent, and a dull reality would take its place. However, the entire atmosphere that Carnegie Hall produced stirred Paul and left him restless. Soon, Paul began to feel that the world of the arts that so enriched him was much more favorable than the mundane world he lived in, and therefore didn’t wish to leave. It became increasingly difficult for him to transition from his job within the Hall to his average life on Cordelia Street. Paul often had “the feeling of not being able to let down; of its being impossible to give up this delicious excitement which was the only thing that could be called living at all” (Cather, 201). The “delicious excitement” which came from the extravagance and beauty that the theater and arts provided left him to see the commonplace world in which he truly lived as ugly and crude.

In comparison to Carnegie Hall, the world in which he lived in was dull and unsightly, and so he began to look on his lifestyle with disgust. His feelings extended so far as to cause him to “loathe” his own home. The author states, “He approached it tonight with the nervous sense of defeat, the hopeless feeling of sinking back forever into ugliness and commonness that he had always had when he came home” (Cather, 202). Paul seemed to detest everything about his home, from the designs of his bedpost to the ill‐kept sink he described upon the mention of his house. His hatred for the “common” world in which he lived, as well as the contempt for those who shared it with him, brought about Paul’s abnormal behavior.

17 Because he couldn’t stand the world outside the theater, his behavior towards those in that world was poor. Paul would lie to his classmates about taking on important endeavors and meeting near‐famous people in order to appear as though he was above the people of other working‐class families. He would also avoid his teachers and act terribly towards them, for they were as simple and ugly to Paul as his home. For instance, whilst Paul was writing on the board in class, the narrator recounts that “his teacher stepped to his side and attempted to guide his hand. Paul had started back with a shudder and thrust his hand violently behind him” (Cather, 198). It was an act of revulsion that the teacher didn’t fail to recognize, and was incredibly “hurt and embarrassed” (Cather,198). Paul was truly able to experience the life of which he dreamed at Carnegie Hall, where his character and conduct were completely transformed. As an usher, he would enthusiastically hustle back and forth helping people to their seats. An audience who hadn’t known Paul as anything but an usher would’ve thought he was the most thoughtful boy they had ever met. However, because his poor behavior led to expulsion from his school his father forbid him to return to his job as an usher. He was cut off from all of his connections in Carnegie Hall, and sent to work. When Paul’s father relayed the events of his absence to the actors Cather writes, “The members of the stock company were vastly amused when some of Paul’s stories reached them…and they laughed rather bitterly at having stirred the boy to such fervid and florid inventions” (Cather, 207). For even though Paul himself had not created the arts and lifestyle he enjoyed, he used them to form himself an alternate reality. Paul’s only window into this luxurious fantasy was closed. This finally spurred him to leave his home, and was the ultimate cause of his suicide.

Paul was greatly engrossed by the luxuries presented in the art, theater, and the lives of impressive people that went or performed there. However, because of being subject to all of these beautiful sights, sounds, and people he looked disdainfully upon the realm of normal working‐class families. Paul wanted to forever live in the rose‐colored world he created for himself instead of the world that was moving on around him. His revulsion towards his surroundings led to negative and perilous results such as his expulsion from school, leaving his home, and eventually his death. While many others have used music as a refuge from the world, the arts drove Paul away from everything else around him.

18 James Castle by Maggie Golder

My resolve as hard as concrete If for nothing but a word: conceited. I foolishly stood by it, And for it I was scarred. The punishment became too great. At the moment it was so appealing— The sky— And the window was wide open. I jumped and before my eyes The concrete came to meet me As hard as my resolve.

19 Remembering the Trouble‐Maker by Norm a Gonzalez

One day my cousin pulled the fire alarm at his middle school and he got in trouble. People didn't know him as a trouble‐maker in school, just at home. We called him a trouble‐maker at home because we were his little cousins, and we thought that he was the meanest person we had ever seen. But the funny thing was that at school he was best known as “the good kid" or "the A+ student." He always got good grades, better than my other cousins and other people. He pulled the alarm because he just wanted to see what that was and what it did, and because in El Salvador we did not have those fire alarms. So when he pulled it, the alarm went on and everyone went outside and the teachers were asking among each other what was going on because it wasn't planned. So they were trying to find out who did it and why he did it and they ended up finding out that it was my cousin who had done it. So he ended up getting in trouble in school and at home by his mom and dad. At school his punishment was getting in school suspension and detention during recess. At home he got grounded so he couldn’t go out with his friends.

20 Holden: The Universal Teenager by Ahmed Ismail

I didn’t even bother to listen to him. –J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

One may ask, what really makes a teenager modern? According to my friend, Juliana Beall, “The modern teenager has a craving to escape a sheltered life.” In the novel, The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger, Holden shares many characteristics with modern teenagers. Holden’s cravings for independence, his confusion about sex, and his questioning of his religion are problems that all teenagers deal with. For this reason, any young person can relate to Holden.

The first way Holden is linked to a typical 2011 teenager is his desire for independence. As one may notice, Holden never asks his parents for their help. He lives on his own for a very long time and doesn’t mention living with his parents at all throughout the story. He leaves his comfort zone and learns how to live alone and take care of himself, as well as rely on himself. Most people want to gain independence in their teenaged stage of life. My sister, like Holden, is a perfect example of a teenager wanting independence. Mirna, my sister, is a senior now in high school and has applied to many colleges, some even out‐of‐state. She hopes to get accepted to an out‐of‐state college so she can move out of the house and live independently in a college dorm.

Furthermore, typical teenagers try to get out of trouble whenever they do happen to be in trouble. When they do get in trouble and can’t get out, they try to cover it up before their parents find out. They think they know more than their parents and believe that their parents are always wrong. I for one think the same way. When Holden gets kicked out of Pencey because of his grades, he figures his parents won’t know about it until later on. He wants to wait for his parents to find out from someone else so their anger is less severe. Holden writes, “I didn’t want to be around when they first got it. My mother gets very hysterical. She’s not too bad after she gets something thoroughly digested, though” (51). This small passage of the book shows how Holden wants to be independent because he doesn’t want pity from his parents. Holden assumes he can fix this problem by being a better student the following year.

The second way Holden relates to a typical 2011 teenager is with his craving of sex all the time. Most males during puberty would do anything to have sex, and Holden is the same. Holden declares, “In my mind, I’m probably the biggest sex maniac you ever see. Sometimes I can think of very crumby stuff I wouldn’t mind doing if the opportunity came up” (62). Even though Holden is constantly complaining about girls, he still tries to get involved in sexual activities with them. He even shows the reader that he is looking for sexual pleasure by hiring a prostitute to be with him at the hotel. He ends up not doing anything with her, but this section of the novel shows how his testosterone level kicks up a notch sometimes. Keep in mind that Holden says that he had the chance to “give the time” to women, but he actually never knows how to. Surprisingly, not many guys are that different from him. I blame the internet, TV, and magazines for making males believe sex is the best thing in the world. Teenagers think purity is an embarrassing thing. They think that everyone knows everything about sex, when they really don’t.

21

Despite the fact that religion and sex seem to be at polar opposites of the social spectrum, in the teenage world they may go hand in hand. Many teenagers nowadays are very confused about their religion and start questioning it. In this day and age teenagers don’t listen to what their religion says about sex, and go against the advice of adults by having sex before marriage. In The Catcher in the Rye, the author does not link sex and religion together as many teenagers do today. Teenagers, like me, believe that just because we follow a certain religion, doesn’t mean we have to do everything it tells us to do. Holden even says that he sometimes is an atheist. He sometimes agrees with his religion and prays. Other times he doesn’t pray because of his unusual outlook on the church. I can relate to this problem. Whenever I doubt my religion, or feel it is unfair, I don’t pray. Whenever I feel that religion isn’t bringing me down, and that it’s guiding me toward the right path, I pray. Holden reports, “Take the Disciples, for instance. They annoy the hell out of me, if you want to know the truth. They were all right after Jesus was dead and all, but while he was alive, they were about as much use to him as a hole in the head” (99). This little segment of the story shows how Holden questions his religion. This can be compared to the modern world since many teenagers question their religion.

On the whole, Holden is like a typical modern teenager. His craving for independence, his confusion about sex, and his questioning of his religion help connect him to the teenagers of today. For example, there are several similarities between Holden, my peers, my sister, and myself. What do you think? Have we ever been like Holden at some point of our lives?

22

Phantasmagoria (Part II of Darken Dusk) by Henry Lee

I have traveled to and from many places. I was forced to move out a lot because of how I looked and my color. The forest animals forced me out because I’m an aberration. Places like the rainforest, savanna, taiga, and tropical rainforest. So now I have escaped to this city.

I don’t know what I am. All I know was that I’m a small animal that looks purple. I don’t even know if there is a name, in human term, for my race. I’m a very visible animal, that’s why I was being preyed upon so many times. If I was put with a thousand animals altogether, I would be the first to catch the eye. There was one time when three Chinese alligators in the swamp tried to eat me. Because I was small like a genuine piggy bank, so I could hide in small places. They were chasing me, and then I accidentally fell in a gap where the tree branches split. Another time a black‐ chested buzzard‐eagle tried to get me, but I fell into a hole by accident. I’m pretty clumsy. Oh, I forgot to tell you that I been having many dreams about being human. That’s why I know many things that humans know. I don’t really get it but I think my past life may have been a human life…or perhaps it’s my distant future.

This feeling of water dripping onto me makes me feels so nostalgic. I fell down in an alley somewhere in this crowded lonesome city. I’m so solitary. I wonder if I will ever find any other animals in the world of my kind. My body is starving and I’m really fatigued. I’m so cold and I can’t think. My consciousness is slowly starting to fade away. Then I see a faint figure of a person with an umbr ella coming toward me. My sight gets blurrier and I try to lift my head up to see the whole picture. My head feels heavy and I fell asleep as soon as my head touches the ground.

I woke up in an apartment. I was in the arms of a beautiful girl. She had long brown hair. She was the nicest person I have ever come across. Her voice is so warm that I feel so happy just hearing her speak. She was beautiful like a flower, and kind of like a mother. She was so beautiful and so kind that I grew attached to her very quickly. She was a high school student who lived alone in this apartment. She woke up in the morning when the sun hadn’t risen yet and left food for me to eat when she went out. She always lowered herself and said, “I’ll be back soon, so wait for me, okay?” Then she would leave the apartment through that dark heavy door. I would often hear the sound of the buses, trains and airplanes. It gave me an idea.

One day I decide to follow her to school. When I was in the school, I was near the front gate, where there were little bushes and I hid in there. I saw Her classroom up at the third floor, and I tried to g et her attention by running around in the front gate and showing myself in the bushes. She was staring out into the sky.

She whispered to herself, “I want to fly.” Then she looked down and saw me surprisingly.

She came to the front gate, and asked, while kneeling down, “What are you doing here? More importantly, how did you know my school was here? Did you come all the way here?”

I only made some sounds to answer her questions. She had no choice so she took me in the building. She held me to her chest in the hallway and other students were looking at her like what is she doing? Normal people would have put me in a locker or a container, but she didn’t. She told me to stay put like a pillow and I did what she said because I didn’t want her to get in trouble. She

23 kept me on her lap in class and when the teachers asked what she was holding, she would answer, “It’s a cushion.”

I noticed something that day. She was eating alone at lunch time. She didn’t talk to anyone, except me. She was alone, was what I thought. That’s when I decided, I will do my best to keep her company.

We got back home and she started reading a book. “Do you want to read with me?” she asked.

I made a poo noise as a “yes.” She held me up and put me on her chest. She lay down on the ground and started reading the book, but all I did was stare at her with heartful eyes. Hmm, if I recal right, the book was called The Hedgehog’s Dilemma. It was the happiest moment of my life.

I could feel her warmth. I could hear her slow and gentle heartbeat with the clock as one. She took me out for walks a lot in the evening. I tried to stay as close to her as possible because it was painful to have the thought of losing someone dear to you.

Our walking route was: Apartment ‐‐ Store ‐‐ Shrine ‐‐ Park (and back).

She always talked about her school life and what she dreamed about in the past few nights. She talked to me as if I were actually human. We walked to the playground and stopped there, watching other kids play and enjoy nature. After that we walked back home.

24 Hiding Behind the Hat by Emily Perlman

In the novel, The Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger, the main character, Holden Caulfield, “hides” behind his red hunting hat to escape from his feelings of not fitting in with society. Holden is a 16‐year‐old boy who was just kicked out of prep school. He thinks all adults are phony and is often dissatisfied with the people around him. In response, he repeatedly runs away (“hides”) from different people and situations in search of feeling accepted. For this reason, The Catcher in the Rye is a quest narrative about Holden’s search for acceptance from others.

On the first stop of Holden’s quest for acceptance, he visits his teacher, old Spencer. Early in the book, we learn that Holden has failed out of his prep school, Pencey, so Holden goes to Mr. Spencer’s home to say goodbye. Mr. Spencer tells him that “life is a game that one plays according to the rules” (12). This is not what Holden feels or what he wants to hear. Holden feels that “if you get on the side where all the hot shots are, then it’s a game” (12‐13). In other words, Holden feels he is on the wrong side, without the hot shots, and does not want to change his personality or behaviors to become accepted. So he leaves old Spencer’s house annoyed with Mr. Spencer and feels unaccepted.

Another time that Holden shows that he wants to be accepted is on his date with Sally Hayes. Holden tells Sally he loves her at the beginning of the date and really believes he does at the time. However, the date takes a bad turn later when Holden asks Sally to run away with him. While with Sally, Holden thinks he has a clear head on what he wants in life and he feels “excited as hell” (171) thinking about running away with Sally. Even though Holden felt confident about this, Sally didn’t accept the idea, saying “you can’t just do something like that” (171). Holden now felt rejected by Sally, so he pushed her away by telling her she gives him a “royal pain in the ass” (173). Although Holden wants to be accepted and fit in, he repeatedly pushes people away.

Later on in the book, Holden does find people in his life who accept him, though it is not always clear to him at the time. For example, Holden goes to visit Mr. Antolini when he was looking for a place to stay in New York City. Mr. Antolini is a former teacher of Holden’s whom he trusts. Mr. Antolini reassures Holden that he’s “not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by human behavior” (246). He told Holden that he knows where Holden is coming from and it is okay to feel the way he is feeling. He also tells Holden that “someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from you” (246). Unfortunately, Holden runs away from Mr. Antolini’s house when he is awakened by Mr. Antolini patting his head while he is sleeping. Though Mr. Antolini accepted Holden and genuinely wanted to help him, Holden left his apartment feeling very upset. Holden was confused and thought that maybe Mr. Antolini was “flitty.” Holden never really understood that Mr. Antolini accepted him.

Lastly, Holden’s younger sister, Phoebe, teaches him the greatest lesson of all. Phoebe is only ten years old, but is very wise, knows Holden better than anyone else and is very devoted to him. Before Holden goes to Mr. Antolini’s house, Phoebe lends Holden her Christmas money and Holden realizes how much Phoebe cares about him. He starts to cry and gives Phoebe his red

25 hunting hat because “she likes those crazy kind of hats” (233). So, even though Holden says he is giving Phoebe the hat because “she really likes those kinds of hats,” (233), in truth, he is coming out of his hiding by parting with his hat because he feels accepted by Phoebe. Later, when Holden comes back from Mr. Antolini’s house and tells Phoebe he wants to run away and leave, without telling Holden she packs her bags to leave with him, but then Holden won’t let her come. At first she is very angry with Holden for not letting her come with him. “All she did was, she took off my red hunting hat – the one I gave her – and practically chucked it right in my face” (269). But as they walk to the carousel in Central Park, she becomes less angry. Holden realizes that Phoebe accepts him and will not let him push her away no matter how hard he tries. Holden loves Phoebe very much and she clearly loves him too. “Then what she did – it damn near killed me – she reached in my coat pocket and took out my red hunting hat and put it on my head” (274). This is when he realizes that Phoebe accepts him for everything he is and watching Phoebe on the carousel, he felt “so damn happy all of a sudden” (275). Just watching Phoebe and being with her gave him comfort to be himself. Thus, these experiences made him realize that he can be accepted.

Holden’s quest eventually teaches him that he can be accepted. The visit to Mr. Spencer and his date with Sally Hayes force him to realize the fact that people don’t always accept you and tell you what you want to hear. But, by the end of the book Holden should have recognized that although everyone did not accept him as he was, his quest for acceptance was successful. Both Mr. Antolini and Phoebe did accept Holden. The Catcher in the Rye teaches us that it is really important to believe in yourself and also realize that, as you go through life, you will meet some people that you fit in with and some people you don’t fit in with and it is OK to just be yourself. There are lots of people around who will accept you for who you are and you don’t need to hide behind a hat for protection.

26 Holden’s Journey by Adam Rubenstein

I don’t even know what I was running for‐‐I guess I just felt like it. ‐‐J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

Have you ever been afraid? Today there are many people just like Holden who are afraid to grow up. Numerous kids in high school do not know what path in life they will take as they look towards the future and start thinking about college. Some people may not go to college because they can’t afford it or they don’t have the grades. Then there are people like Holden who are constantly getting kicked out of school not because of the terrible things they have done but for their lack of hard work and being disinterested. Holden Caulfield is constantly struggling to find his way in life. He is uncomfortable talking to others about his future because he does not want to accept the fact that he needs to grow up. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger is a quest narrative because Holden, the main character is constantly searching for answers to what his future will be. Through out the book, people are trying to help Holden find his way; yet he constantly ignores them because he is afraid to grow up. However, Holden keeps searching despite his fear.

Holden does not want to face the consequences of growing up and becoming an adult. He is distraught when he thinks of leaving his childhood behind and forgetting his childhood memories. An example of Holden fearing adulthood and the disappearance of his childhood memories is when he arrives home one night, his sister Phoebe asks Holden what he likes. Holden ponders for a while and then says, “I like Allie. And I like doing what I’m doing right now. Sitting here with you, and talking, and thinking about stuff” (222). In this passage Holden reminisces about his brother, Allie, who died as a young boy. Holden relates to Allie because his brother never had the chance to experience growing up and becoming an adult. Holden wants to model his life after Allie’s because he fears growing up. He is resistant to growing up because he is scared of confronting the responsibilities of adulthood. Holden is also worried that he will forget about Allie as he grows older.

Holden is searching for something he may like to do with his life. However, he is afraid to face his future. When Phoebe tries to help Holden, he fabricates excuses as to why he does not want to talk about his future, or he just ignores her. One example of Holden making up excuses in order to change the subject is when Phoebe asked Holden, “Name something you’d like to be. Like a scientist. Or a lawyer or something” (223) Holden responds, “I couldn’t be a scientist. I’m no good in science. Lawyers are all right, I guess but it doesn’t appeal to me. All you do is make a lot of dough and play golf and look like a hot shot. How would you know you weren’t being a phony? The trouble is you wouldn’t” (223‐224). When Phoebe tries to help Holden he becomes extremely defensive and pessimistic. He does not feel he is capable of working as a scientist or lawyer because he believes he is just a kid. Holden is nervous about growing up and moving on with his life because he has never been able to succeed at anything and he believes if he stays a kid he will not fail. Holden lacks the confidence he needs to grow and mature, which prevents him from facing the challenges and responsibilities of adulthood.

27 This fear of failure causes Holden to ignore people who want to help him find his path in life. Holden believes people that have real working jobs are phonies. He does not want to be like them. An example when Holden is trying to figure out his path is when he is in a taxicab going to a hotel, he asks the taxi driver, “You know those ducks in that lagoon right near Central Park South? That little lake? By any chance, do you happen to know where they go, the ducks, when it gets all frozen over? Do you happen to know, by any chance?” (78). In this passage the reader may believe Holden is simply asking where the ducks go when it gets cold out. However, the ducks symbolize Holden and where he will eventually end up when things become difficult for him. Furthermore, in a very deceiving way Holden likes to talk about his future. However, when others try to direct him he becomes anxious, he feels withdrawn and tries to change the subject because he fears failure.

The Catcher in the Rye is a quest narrative because throughout the story the main character is searching for answers about himself and his future. Although Holden is reluctant to ask for help, in the end he realizes that being with his family, especially Phoebe, helps him to figure out his next steps in life. In many cases people need to be comforted and loved by their families in order to grow up and face their fears just like Holden.

28 The Secret to Success by Carrie Rybecky

… how do you know what you’re going to do till you do it? ‐‐J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

Thinking about one’s future can cause a great deal of stress. The idea of following the “right” path of stereotypical way to success is not always palatable for everyone. What does a person have to accomplish in order to be successful? What defines success? Most people, now a days, believe a person is only successful if they the go to college, get a job and make a lot of money. However, for many individuals success can simply mean enjoying your life and doing what makes you happy. If this is the case, a person that is happy with their life can be equally as triumphant as a stereotypically successful being. Every person in society has their own individual opinion about the definition of success and how to become successful. Throughout the novel, The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger, Holden Caulfield is constantly receiving advice, pertaining to what should be his next step in life. However none of the advice that comes his way seems to interest or influence him. Holden is a unique kid that will not allow himself to be molded into the stereotypical successful man. For these reasons, Holden tends to ignore the advice he is given by others and only follows his own ideals, no matter how far from ordinary they may be.

Holden is going through life acting as if he doesn’t have a care or a concern in the world about anything or anyone. The people close to him notice what they believe to be faults in his actions and continually attempt to guide him onto a more stable life path in the hopes he will become as successful. However, Holden shows no interest in the wisdom of his friends or family and resists the advice he is given because he has a different idea of success. A previous teacher of Holden’s, Mr. Spencer, wisely states, “Life is a game, boy. Life is a game that one play according to the rules” (8). Mr. Spencer lectures Holden about the importance of passing school and following the general rules of society in order to attain a solid future. Mr. Spencer abruptly asks Holden, “Do you feel absolutely no concern for your future boy?”‐‐ clearly he is annoyed by Holden’s inattentiveness while he was speaking to him (14). Once Holden is presented with a question about the future, he shuts down and blocks out the rest of what Mr. Spencer had to say. Holden comments, “I couldn’t’ve sat there another ten minutes to save my life” (15). Holden’s reluctance to receive advice is again demonstrated later on in his narrative, when another former teacher, Mr. Antolini, warns him about his current actions and their possible consequences. Mr. Antolini carefully remarks, “I have a feeling that you’re riding for some kind of a terrible, terrible fall… a special kind of fall, a horrible kind… Are you listening to me?” (186‐187). Holden is not listening to Mr. Antolini’s predictions in the slightest bit. Holden is instead stuck in the moment and only cares about the fact that he was tired. This exemplifies Holden’s restraint to take in advice about something other than what’s occurring right in the moment; in other words, the future.

Holden not only resists the advice from wise elders, he also avoids the pressing questions pertaining to his future when they are posed to him by his sister Phoebe. Throughout Holden’s narrative, he continually speaks about his love for Phoebe and his admiration for her intelligence. However, all of these thoughts seem to be forgotten when Phoebe brings up the uncomfortable

29 subject of his plans for the future. Holden immediately becomes closed off and disgruntled when Phoebe tells him to “… name something you’d like to be. Like a scientist or a lawyer or something” (172). Holden tries to avoid the question but Phoebe would not drop the subject until she receives an answer. Eventually, Holden fabricates an imaginary story of wanting to be a catcher of children in the rye, just to get her to drop the subject of his future. Holden creates this fake job scenario to avoid having to give Phoebe a real answer to her question. The hesitation and resistance to confront matters concerning his future are a common occurrence as Holden progresses through life.

However this is not the case when Holden is constantly asking himself questions about the future. Holden is a walking contradiction to his own actions. At different moments throughout the book Holden seems to get genuinely excited about an idea or plan he creates in his mind about what he would like to do down the road. For instance, while Holden was on his date with Sally Hayes, he had a spur of the moment idea to runaway with Sally and to go live up in New England. Holden kept pushing his idea on Sally because he “… was getting excited as hell, the more [he] thought of it” (132). Holden explains to Sally, “Here’s my idea. How would you like to get the hell out of here?... What we could do is…Borrow his car for a couple weeks… and drive up to Massachusetts and Vermont... We’ll stay in these cabin camps… till the dough runs out” (132). When Holden comes up with an idea, of his own, about what he would like to do in the future, he shows no hesitation or signs of reluctance to fulfill his plans. This eagerness is a polar opposite reaction when compared to Holden’s attitude when he discusses his future with someone else. In a way, Holden contradicts his own actions when he becomes excited about a plan for the future and then switches personas and avoid the topic all together when it is brought up by someone other than himself.

As Holden advances through life, he appears to be on a quest for answers about his future. However, when someone other than he himself brings up the subject, he shuts them out and is reluctant to discuss the matter. When he fabricates a plan himself he is very enthusiastic and ready to act on it instantly, but then he becomes unsure soon after and never completes the plan. He is never truly capable of fully answering most of the questions he comes upon or acting on the few answers he does accept. Holden’s quest to achieve success is stalled by his hesitations to receive the input from someone other than himself.

30 Like Mother, Unlike Daughter by Ali Verdi

I have a theory that every time you make an important choice, the part of you lef t behind continues the other life you could have had. ‐‐Jeanette Winterson, Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit

Conflicting passions is a common obstacle adolescents face growing up. The word passion, meaning a powerful or compelling emotion or feeling, causes conflict in the novel Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit by Jeanette Winterson. There are two conflicting passions in the story: Jeanette’s mother’s passion for religion, along with the entire community, against Jeanette’s passion for other women, as she discovers she is a lesbian. These two passions conflict with each other because the religion of Jehovah’s Witnesses is strongly against the idea of gays, lesbians, and same‐sex marriage. Conflicting feelings of religion and sexual orientation are recurring themes in the novel.

Jeanette is surrounded by people who are extremely devout Jehovah’s Witnesses inside of her home and out. Jeanette’s mother, a key character in the novel that symbolizes the devoutness of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Jeanette’s mother reads the Bible and listens to the religious radio station at home. Because the people of Jehovah's Witnesses believe the world is going to end, Jeanette’s mother would pray everyday to God thanking Him that He let her see another day. On Sundays, her mom would pray for hours, not letting anyone in her room. Jeanette’s mom’s passion for this religion is extreme devotion. Everything in their lives revolves around religion. Her mother worships this religion so much that she has Jeanette’s life planned out. Her mother had a certain plan even before adopting Jeanette. Winterson writes, “She would get a child, train it, build it, dedicate it to the Lord: a missionary child a servant of God, a blessing” (10). This shows Jeanette’s mother’s love for this religion. Not only is her life all about religion, but she is trying to make Jeanette’s life about this as well. Many people in Jeanette’s church and community also have a passion for Jehovah’s Witnesses. The people in Jeanette’s church have a fervor for their religion, and everything in their lives revolves around it. The church is even trying to get people to join their community. Winterson writes, “It was a proud day when they hoisted the flag, with SEEK YE THE LORD embroidered in red letters...During the first year my mother had gone into pubs and clubs urging the drunkards to join her at church” (36). The members of the church are even interested in finding more people to recruit. Both Jeanette’s mother, and the people of the church are so motivated, inspired, and have truly sought dedication by this religion. For example, Jeanette’s mom and the church plan prayer trips, religious festivals, and big events like the Salvation Army meet. The people of the church have such strong emotions and ardor for Jehovah’s Witnesses.

In the novel, Jeanette finds herself finding her own passion, which is not at all similar to her mother’s or the community’s. Jeanette find that she has feelings for woman. Jeanette meets a few girls in the novel, and has relationships with them. Jeanette shows her passion for her second love affair, Katie. Winterson writes, “She was my most uncomplicated love affair, and I loved her because of it. She seemed to have no worries at all...” (123). This shows how much Jeanette has an attraction toward girls. Katie makes Jeanette feel reassured that nothing will happen because of Katy’s energetic and uplifting personality. Katie makes Jeanette feel even better about her feelings

31 of being a lesbian. Jeanette is happy when she is with Katie. Jeanette even shows her passion, but in a negative way, when her old lover, Melanie comes back, declaring her heterosexuality. Winterson writes, “...I objected to her getting married to him. And she was serene, serene to the point of being bovine. I was so angry, I tried to talk to her about it” (124). Jeanette is mainly upset because she is mad that Melanie gave into the church’s beliefs and left her. Jeanette believes that she really loved Melanie and was truly attracted to her. Another factor that shows Jeanette’s passion is that she does care about getting in trouble, and she doesn’t want to be known as a bad girl, but her passion interferes with this. In certain parts of the novel, it seems that Jeanette does not care about getting in trouble by her mother or the church, but this is only because she can’t deny who she really is and has other strong feelings deep inside. Jeanette’s uncontrolled feelings toward girls conflicts with her mother and the community’s zeal for their religion.

Jeanette’s passion and the community’s passion conflict because of the teachings of Jehovah’s Witnesses and what they believe in. Jehovah’s Witnesses ban the idea of same sex marriage, or being gay or lesbian. Throughout the novel, the term “unnatural passions” is brought up often. This term basically is saying that it is unnatural to have passions for people the same sex. When Jeanette asked about the two woman that were not married and were old, her mother replied that they “dealt in unnatural passions” (7). This shows that Jehovah’s Witnesses see the feeling of liking someone the same sex as you to be “abnormal” and “prohibited.” The church believes that if one feels this, that they are being taken over by the devil. Jeanette makes it clear that she knows what to expect within the church when she compares homosexuals to animals. Winterson writes, “At that point I had no notion of sexual politics, but I knew that a homosexual is further away from a woman than a rhinoceros. Now that I do have a number of notions about sexual politics, this early observation holds good” (128). This makes it clear of how strongly the church opposes homosexuality. They are unwilling to accept anyone who is not straight, and feel that homosexuals do not belong in their church. They even tried to take “the devil” out of Jeanette when they found out about her. When the preaching and reprimanding wasn’t working, they confined her to a room, alone, where she had nothing to do.

The two clashing passions are the cause of a self versus community conflict. Jeanette is a lesbian, and her church shuns her because of her sexuality and her relationships with other young women. This leads to unfair treatment of Jeanette, when the church tries to change her. In the end, the church is unable to change Jeanette and they are unwilling to accept her feelings. Jeanette decides to live on her own, leaving the church and partially her community. Jeanette still visits her mother, but separates herself from her mother’s life. Oranges are Not the Only Fruit portrays conflicting passions between a mother and daughter. This novel raises a controversial question, Is it ever appropriate to betray the teachings of your childhood and your mothers wishes?

32 Three Outsiders by Ali Verdi

Imagine a girl disconnected from the rest of society because of her religious beliefs. This girl dresses differently than everyone else in school. Many people ignore her and avoid communication because she looks different and has different religious beliefs. This makes her an outsider, a person who is disconnected or unaccepted within society. Being an outsider causes conflict and problems because of rejection and lack of acceptance. However, outsiders find ways to accept themselves. Oranges are Not the Only Fruit by Jeanette Winterson, Tell Us We’re Home by Marina Budhos, and The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison, are three novels that explore the theme of being an outsider because of ethnicity or race, and sexuality.

Jeanette, the main character in Oranges are not the Only Fruit, is considered an outsider in a situation that is not so common. Jeanette realizes that she is a lesbian, this brings conflict, because Jeanette’s mother is a devout Jehovah's Witness. This religion is very strict and strongly discredits the idea of gays or lesbians. Jeanette is placed in a tough decision when her mother is unwilling to accept this “unnatural passion” as the church calls it. Her mother gets the church involved to try to release the “demon” out of Jeanette. In the end, Jeanette cannot have both her religion and the decision to be a lesbian. Jeanette is seen as an outsider by her family, her church, and her town. Even at the end of the novel, when Jeanette makes her final decision to stay true to her inner feelings, Winterson still portrays Jeanette as an outsider. Winterson writes, “At that point I had no notion of sexual politics, but I knew that a homosexual is further away from a woman than a rhinoceros” (128). Though Jeanette might be joking, this comparison that she thinks of, shows how strict everyone is about homosexuality. Jeanette is surrounded by people who are unaccepting of what she is, a feeling that she cannot control. Jeanette faces a hard time throughout the rest of the novel, and even in the end, Jeanette still does not belong within her community.

Lola, Jaya and Maria are the three main characters in Tell Us We’re Home. These girls have all moved from foreign places, to a rich town, Meadowbrook, New Jersey. Meadowbrook seems to be a lot like Port Washington, a town with a lot of money and a lot of rich families. These girls feel like outsiders, because they are very different from the people they go to school with. The three girls cannot afford what the rich kids can afford. Also, the girls’ moms work for their classmates families, as house cleaners. All three girls are in the same exact position and do not feel comfortable in the environment in that they live in. Budhos writes, “The other girls would gaze at her, with their sparkly green glitter eyes, their perfect tanned arms, as if she were an alien on the planet” (14). This shows what it was like for the girls to live there. They were surrounded by people who looked, and seemed better than them, just because they could afford big houses and to live a spoiled and rich life. The girls were looked at as social outcasts and felt that they didn’t belong. Not only did the girls feel like strangers, but their families did too. For example, Maria’s mother feels like she does not belong in the town. Maria’s mother says to her, “Don’t be a stranger to me. I live in a world of strangers. Please” (143). This shows that it’s hard for the girls’ families, as well as the girls. They feel that it is hard to survive in the town too. How the girls feel in school,

33 against to all of their rich classmates, is probably how the parents feel. They feel inferior to the families, especially because the girls’ mothers work for them.

In The Bluest Eye, Pecola Breedlove feels like an outsider because she is an African American, and not like the blonde‐haired, blue‐eyed image seen everywhere. Pecola is surrounded by white people, who look very different from her, and have very different lives. The novel shows Pecola being treated very poorly, by her family, and also being taken advantage of, by men. She is not treated equally to little white girls in this time period. Pecola is treated poorly, and is treated as an outsider in her community. Girls Pecola’s age would make fun of her and bully her, and her own father had no respect for her, when he raped her. The community used Pecola to make themselves feel better. Morrison writes, “We were so beautiful when we stood astride her ugliness. Her simplicity decorated us, her guilt sanctioned us, her pain made us glow with health, her awkwardness made us think we had a sense of humor....Her poverty kept us generous” (205). Pecola was used as a scapegoat for the society. They used Pecola to express their self‐hatred, by hating her and to make themselves feel better. The community is in denial about themselves, and watching Pecola suffer made them feel better about themselves. Pecola made the people of the community feel beautiful, healthy, funny, smart and generous. Pecola is only used by the community and is looked down upon.

In all three novels, Jeanette, Lola, Jaya and Maria, and Pecola are isolated from society because of various reasons. Jeanette in Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit accepts the fact that following her passion will result in her communities' unwillingness to accept her. Lola, Maria, and Jaya in Tell Us We’re Home also face the fact that they cannot fit in with their society. However, Pecola in The Bluest Eye still wishes to be someone she is not and does not want to face that she differs from others. Some people in society face the fact that they are different, while others wish to fit in and be someone they are not.

34 An Unknown Trouble‐Maker by Sama ra Walsh

Everyone knows troublemakers and has stories of them. Troublemakers are people who are usually considered "bad,” but usually their mischievous behavior makes for great stories. I remember in middle school I encountered a particular troublemaker who stirred up trouble and caused what would become a very memorable incident.

It occurred in sixth grade and it was a typical class day. We did our usual work work, studying new topics and noting teachers' explanations of subjects. Then, our teachers informed us that something had occurred, and we went outside on the football field for a safety drill. A few students had either threatened to plant a bomb in the middle school, or claimed that they already had hidden one somewhere in the school.

For our own safety, the teachers were directed by the administrators to bring us out on the football field, located across the street from the school. It was a hot day and summer was approaching. Everyone had to endure the scorching, blistering heat. The children and faculty were sweating and some classes sat in the shade to keep cool. However, everyone had to stay outside for a few ho urs until the teachers were finally informed it was safe to bring the students back in.

No one knew who the trouble‐makers were who had caused all the ruckus, not even the faculty or principal. It was never found out who the students were who made the call or if the bomb threats were legitimate, but it was rumored to have been some seventh graders. Whoever it had been wh o called and made the threat had managed to disturb the school day for two or three hours.

Everyone remembers the bomb threats in middle school. After discussing the event with peers, I discovered that many of the students actually enjoyed sitting on the field. They were happy to miss class that day.

35 The Perks of Summer Reading by Emily Weinstein

Sometimes, I read a book, and I think am the people in the book. ‐‐Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Over this past summer I read the novel The Perks Of Being A Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky. To my surprise, this novel quickly became one of the most interesting and thoughtful books I have ever read. Of course upon picking up the book, I assumed it would just be another typical boring novel of which Schreiber forces us to read. I picked the book because my friend recommended it, so I trusted that it would, if nothing else, be the lesser of the evils. Yet, this novel completely surpassed all of my expectations.

It was not the place I was in as I read this book that helped me, it was actually the music I was listening to. As I read this novel I would move from place to place, trying to make myself comfortable, whether it was a rainy day in my house, or when we were on the car trip to say goodbye to my brother. At one point in the novel, Charlie, the main character, references two songs: “Landslide,” by Fleetwood Mac, and “Blackbird,” by the Beatles. It was definitely not a typical way that someone would read their summer reading book. Yet, I thought that if Charlie considered those two songs to be “beautiful,” maybe I would get into the story more, or possibly get into Charlie’s head. This method of reading helped me a lot, because not only did it block out the outside noises and help me focus, but I felt that every single word that Chbosky wrote on each page were words that while listening to that music, I could relate to. I found that the words really sunk into my brain. Another thing we both share is common is a love for music. Though Charlie did not play any instruments, he enjoyed making mix tapes for people. He believed that music was not only a way of escaping from problems, but also for celebrating good times.

What did keep me turning the pages? It really is a thoughtful question, as most of the time I find myself slowly drifting off to sleep when I read books. I mainly read for school but I can’t say I read that much for my free time, only on occasion. Perhaps it was the way it was written. Instead of “Charlie said this” or “Charlie did that” Chbosky had created almost a journal entry of some sort. This way of writing is much more interesting, because you feel as if Charlie could be someone in your grade, not just someone in a book you’re reading for school. I believe I can relate well to Charlie myself. I tend to think things through thoroughly. My only sibling had just graduated high school this past June. I remember seeing my brother, and all of his friends, who I had known since I was little, graduating. They were leaving everything in Port Washington, moving on to bigger and better things. The way that Charlie had described his sister’s graduation, really brought back some memori es for me.

Although I wouldn’t consider myself a “wallflower,” I can be shy at times, and I’m only entirely comfortable around my closest friends. I feel that Charlie felt this way as well. His two best friends, Sam and Patrick, were the only people that he didn’t feel out of place with. In fact, he once described himself as feeling “infinite.” Only with his friends could he feel that way.

36 Charlie was not just another introverted kid who opened his mouth but never spoke, who stood but was invisible. He was an individual who was able to think deeply, and in fact, I would be as bold as to say he found himself earlier than most his age.

37 My “Older” Brother: A Monologue by Phoebe Caulfield by Emily Weinstein

She was right, though. It is ‘If a body meet a body coming through the rye’. I didn't know it then, though. ‐‐J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

My older brother, Holden, is so misguided. He has no idea what he wants to do with his life. He thinks he knows everything about the world. You see he uses this phrase “phony” all of the time. He has this pessimistic view that growing up is a horrible thing; certainly not something one would look forward too, but rather, fear. Look, I’m only ten years old myself, so I’m not claiming I know everything that’s going on in his head, but I do believe I have a clue. For some reason, I think Holden believes I’m the only one he can trust. I feel in a way that he sees me as different from other people. I think I’m the only one he’s never called “phony.” My theory is that it’s because I’m the only kid he talks to. Come to think of it, he really only calls adults phony. Sometimes I wish he would just grow up and get a job. I mean, I’m already more mature than him. I do care for him you see, which is why I want him to stay in school for once and get a job so he can provide for himself. Isn’t part of growing up having more independence? Of course if you have more independence, you certainly have to have more responsibilities, but I believe in him. I believe that his time will come soon. One day he’ll just wake up and “smell the coffee.” He’ll come to terms with the fact that he can’t hide from adulthood forever. He’ll realize the world is passing by him so quickly that if he doesn’t start trying soon, he’ll never be able to catch up. Sure, he may not be the best role model of a big brother, but he’s got a big heart at least. He’s a thinker too. I’ve noticed that he’s always analyzing people and things. Nothing gets past Holden. Nothing except for time. Maybe one day, he’ll make a good children’s psychologist. This way, instead of “saving children from adulthood” like he thinks he will in his dream job of being “the catcher in the rye,” he will instead help kids in their struggle to find themselves and mature during their teenage years. Yeah, I think he’d be good at that.

38 Two Faces by George Weiss

The best thing, though, in that museum was that everything always stayed right where it was. Nobody’d move … Nobody’d be different. The only thing that would be different would be you. ‐‐J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

In Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger, Holden Caulfield is nothing more than a normal teenage boy always wanting to hangout with friends and trying to find where he fits in. Holden’s time period,(the 1950‘s) made it very easy to get away with not telling people who you really are and lying about your age, and today he couldn’t have gotten away with this. Holden doesn’t know what to do with his life; he thinks this might be the end of his high school career. J.D. Salinger shows us the hardships of Holden, and the hardships of being a teenager. Holden is a normal teenage boy, because he wants to be independent and talk about sex, drink and smoke to feel older.

Holden, as a sixteen‐year‐old boy gets kicked out of his second high school, Pencey, for failing all of his classes except English. When Holden was kicked out of school, no one called his parents to tell them that he had been kicked out, so Holden would have to do it himself. Like any other teen, the last thing Holden would do is to tell his parents that he somehow got kicked out of school. He would be to scared to tell them. He would know that his parents would probably not let him live with them, or maybe even rent a room so that he learned his lesson. Teenagers today are pushed very hard in their academics‐‐at least I feel this way. Even if someone gets a bad grade, we don’t want to tell our parents, let alone saying something as horrible as getting kicked out of school! We can relate to Holden and feel how horrible this must be, to get kicked out of your second school. A good example of this is my uncle Pete, he got kicked out of high school when he was in ninth grade because he failed all of his classes and didn’t even show up for some and ended up leaving his house. Why? Because he didn’t want to face his parents because like every teen would be he was scared. Holden is a just like any other teenager who feels ashamed when something goes wrong in school.

Another thing that makes Holden and teens today similar is that we both want to be independent with the activities we do. Whether it be a school project, hanging out with friends, or going into the city for a concert, we don’t want our parents to always be nagging us and asking “where are you?” twenty‐four/seven. So Holden when he goes into the city (New York), he feels like he is the boss of what ever he does, not to mention that he wants to wait out the time he has until Christmas. I’m in a way similar to Holden. I love going into the city with my friends and feeling like an adult, and being responsible for myself. When Holden goes into the city also wants to feel responsible for himself and so he drinks so he feels more mature. When people ask Holden how old he is, he replies, “Twenty‐two.” He asks a taxi cab driver, “Would you care to stop off and have a drink with me somewhere?” The cab driver replies, “ I ain’t got no time for no liquor, bud, how the hell old are you, anyways? Why ain’tcha home in bed?” (Pg.83) Like teens in high school, for some reason Holden thinks that drinking is the cool thing to do, like most teenagers do today, so we know how he feels in the sense that he may actually not want to drink, but he wants to feel older and more independent.

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Just like most high school guys, Holden thinks about sex a lot. We’re all going through puberty now and we think of these things. “In my mind I’m probably the biggest sex maniac you ever saw” (62). Most high school guys think and talk about this stuff all the time, and Holden too seems to talk about sex quite often. He even jokes that he might move to China so that his sex life will be better. Holden gets a prostitute from a guy named Maurice. Maurice is a “pimp” whom asks Holden if he would like a prostitute for the night. Her name is Sunny, but for some reason he doesn’t feel like doing anything with her. When she comes over he is awkward in all social situations, and he doesn’t want to hold on to his childhood and she reminds him of a child. “I don’t feel very much like myself tonight. I’ve had a rough night. I’ll pay you and all, but do you mind very much if we don’t do it?” (96). Like most teenage boys if you actually had the opportunity you would probably turn it down because you would be to afraid to actually do it. Holden’s time period is differen t than ours but it doesn’t mean that he’s not similar to us in the way he acts.

Teenagers will always lie to get out of anything. Holden is a very big liar. He even says to us, “I'm the most terrific liar you ever saw in your life. It's awful. If I'm on my way to the store to buy a magazine, even, and somebody asks me where I'm going, I'm liable to say I'm going to the opera. It's terrible” (16). He lied repeatedly about his age and even his name if he felt like it so that he could get what he wanted (like drinks) or so that he didn’t have to tell people who he really was. When you’re a teenager sometimes you feel like you don’t have control of anything so Holden feels very much in control of what his name is, how old he decides to be for that day, and if he wants to drink or not. Many people do it today. They get fake ID’s and go around and buy alcohol for themselves and their friends, only because they think it makes them cool. Holden might have been the same way. He only did it so he could be cool to himself. We relate to Holden because we all tell little lies here and there, to our friends, teachers, and family. Of course we all want to do is be cool, act like grown‐ups and feel like were adults and be mature, but sometimes kids take it too far, like Holden did.

Being a teenager is very confusing because it is a time in your life that your’re changing and deciding things for yourself. Today people, especially young people, are very skeptical about religion because the things you learn in school don’t reflect the idea of religion. Holden thinks about dying and if god is real or not: “Boy, when you're dead, they really fix you up. I hope to hell when I do die somebody has sense enough to just dump me in the river or something. Anything except sticking me in a goddamn cemetery. People coming and putting a bunch of flowers on your stomach on Sunday, and all that crap. Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody” (155). Here Holden is not only thinking about death, but he also might be thinking about his religion, a topic that teens are confused about because what they learn in school contradicts what is taught in church. Holden even refers to himself as an “atheist” during the book. I am surprised to say that quite a few teens I have talked to personally are in fact also atheist. Holden is just thinking about when he is going to die, and how it will happen. Throughout his journey and this story Holden sometimes on and off becomes depressed at random moments like these, not knowing if god is real or not and questioning what will happen to him when he dies. A lot of people my age stress about this topic of when you will die and if god exists.

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If you ask anyone in my grade if they have a brother and a sister and if they fight with them, they will almost always say yes. Brothers and sisters always have a tendency to fight together, Holden and Phoebe are the same way. But for most of the time Holden says nothing but good things about Phoebe and how much he misses her: “But I kept walking over to the mall anyway, because that’s where Phoebe usually goes when she’s in the park.” Here Holden can’t take it anymore, he has to go see Phoebe and tell her what happened. We understand that Holden loves his sister because most of us have siblings and feel the same way that Holden does. We fight with them and love them at the same time. “I felt so damn happy all of a sudden, the way old Phoebe kept going around and around. I was damn near bawling, I Felt so damn happy, if you want to know the truth” (213). When our little brother or sister is happy we also feel happy and enjoy each other’s company.

We were all teenagers, and we all know what stress feels like and we went through the same time in our life so we to can relate to Holden. Holden’s mistakes were not one that everybody does, but his actions were similar to what a teenager today would do. I do feel like Holden is one of my peers. All in all, we all change through out time and people make mistakes and learn from them.

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